Headache feve

Jo Malone English Pear & Freesia? Is it just my nose or does anyone else smell it?
I just got decants (2ml) of Delina, Feve Delicieuse and Mugler Aura. I know Aura is polarising but oddly enough, I loved that one the most (a bit like damp laundry? 😅) Delina smells good, but like I said, smells like Jo Malone to me and also very common to my nose, I literally smell this everywhere! I can’t smell anything other than sandalwood with Feve Delicieuse which gives me a headache.

Either Ray has been here or this medicine cabinet belongs to a druggie 🤣

Hello FragCom! The fair denizens of fragrance may remember me from the niche sample frenzy with my mom a while back. Well, you see, here I was almost finishing up my collection more recently but it kinda bothered me... I don't really have a solid, vanilla-focused fragrance in there, one of the most common notes in perfumery. Sure there's vanilla in some of those frags, but it's never the star of the show.
I also made a new friend recently who, enamored by my enthusiasm, sorta started falling into the world of fragrances as well. After doing some research and being bombarded by Facebook ads, she eventually relented... and bought some samples from Imaginary Authors. She found herself a huge fan of A Whiff of Waffle Cone! And so the search for the Perfect Vanilla Gourmand was born.
Not everything I tested was a vanilla fragrance, there's a sprinkling of a few other hype beasts I decided to finally get around to trying plus a few other wild cards, but most of them are. And since a certain popular niche house just released a flanker to one of the most well-regarded men's fragrances in perfumery today... Yeah, I got my decant of Reflection 45 in Tuesday and have been wearing it for a few days as well. I'm reviewing that too.
In the order I tried them in...
Lune Feline (Atelier des Ors) - Warm balsamic, spicy vanilla opening with woody undertones. I can smell each of the individual spices: the sweet and slightly green cardamom, the cozy cinnamon, and the pepper that pops. Yummy, I do get gourmand vibes from this although not strongly so. The cinnamon softens as it dries down but the cardamom remains ever-present. The scent gets sweeter and smokier over time. Weak-moderate projection for 2-3hr, longevity 5-6hr. 3/5
Ani (Nishane) - Ginger is very noticeable in the opening, along with bergamot and pepper that pops off the skin with a sort of fuzzy, woody and resinous undertones. Not to my tastes, but the vanilla comes in after 20 minutes along with a bright greenness that smells fantastic in comparison. The fresh notes make it a bit lighter wearing than the average vanilla IMO, and it doesn't come across as especially gourmand to me. Projection seems soft at first, but picks up after 45 minutes. Projects for ~2hr, longevity 5-6hr. 3.5/5
Velvet Amber Sun (Dolce & Gabbana) - Opening has a very prominent black pepper accord sitting atop some nondescript woods and vanilla sweetness, underlaid with warm balsamics. Dries down into a fairly simple amber, similar to MFK Grand Soir adding a light dusting of cinnamon and the remaining pepper. I think the cinnamon is a good complement, but that harsh black pepper sticks out like a sore thumb amongst an otherwise soft and warm mixture of sweet accords. Benzoin also tends to produce a disagreeable sharpness off my skin, which it does here but that's a me thing. Moderate projection for 2-3hr, longevity 6-8hr. 2/5
Au Coeur du Desert (Tauer) - I haven't put my nose to L'Air du Desert Marocain for comparison but on its own, I get a powerful herbal blast in the opening sandwiched between fresh spices on top and dry woody undertones. An ambery sweetness quickly makes its presence known and it stays that way through the drydown, getting slowly more syrupy-balsamic over time but never overpowering the other elements of the fragrance. The image evoked in my mind is a vanilla-flavored wind blowing across the twilight desert, picking up bits of sand as it swirls about, enough to feel but not to cause harm. Can wind be flavored? I don't care. Strong projection for ~3hr, longevity 9-11hr. 5/5

• I needed one more sample to toss into my ScentSplit order to hit free shipping and though this isn't a gourmand, it is vanilla! A FragCom darling and hype beast, I thought why not. Well, does it live up to the hype? A resounding yes. Beautiful, evocative scent. Fairly unique. Fantastic performance.

Tobacco Vanille (Tom Ford) - Fresh spicy blast of tobacco in the opening more than vanilla, but the cocoa is a nice touch. Strong and very sweet, pretty linear drydown. Like 50% tobacco, 40% vanilla, 10% cocoa to my nose. It's a bit heavy on the tobacco and overly sweet for my tastes, which might come from the dried fruits lurking in the base notes because I don't think it's the vanilla alone that's so sweet, but I can understand why this is one of Tom Ford's darling frags. Strong projection for 2-3hr, creeping faintly through 4hr. Longevity 7-9hr. 3/5
Silky Woods (Goldfield & Banks) - Pungent opening immediately settles down into a clean oud and creamy vanilla. Earthy woods and leathery accords, a healthy dose of saffron, some vanilla, plus a light dusting of warm cinnamon. Drydown brings in sandalwood to support the oud, a smidge of tobacco leaf and smokiness, and gets progressively sweeter. This is not a vanilla fragrance to me, this is a woody fragrance with vanilla adding a touch of sweetness, and I get more cream than powder. Balanced enough to be an all-occasions fragrance. Solid performance with moderate projection for 3-4hr, longevity 10-12hr. 3/5
Imperium (Electimuss) - One of the lesser known Aventus-likes: pineapple. It's bergamot imitating as opposed to actual pineapple, so it's really more Explorer than Aventus/Hacivat, but same difference. There's a hint of orange, a melange of white florals, and a healthy dose of creamy vanillic sweetness that makes it the brightest and most uplifting fragrance in this "genre," however. Fairly linear drydown to my nose, I never get much of the darker base notes here. The people who says it smells like Aventus/Hacivat + Ani aren't completely wrong, but this is my favorite of all. Moderate projection for 4-5hr, strongest in the 1-3hr range, longevity 12hr+. 5/5

• I'd buy Imperium if it wasn't somewhat redundant with Uden which I already own. It's great in its own right but not the kind of warm & delicious vanilla I seek; a strong 4.5/5 but a weak 5/5.

Tonka Imperiale (Guerlain) - Opening is very sweet and nutty. The bergamot comes across as limey and combines with the rosemary to create a bright green, almost mentholic, overtone mixed with a hint of tobacco leaf, uplifting jasmine, and vanilla. Minimally powdery. Becomes even more sweet as it dries down, something akin to a creme brulee or cream soda with cherries. Moderate projection for 3-4hr, longevity 8-10hr. 3.5/5
Spiritueuse Double Vanille (Guerlain) - Soft, boozy vanilla opening that pops just a smidge, like a vanilla rum-flavored Reflection Man. The boozy accord quickly fades to added sweetness. Gets the faintest hint powdery as it dries down, otherwise linear. Nice scent, trash performance especially for the price. Very soft projection for ~1hr, skin scent for 5-6hr. 4/5
Cuir Beluga (Guerlain) - Creamy vanilla opening with a hint of suede peeking out from beneath. The suede lends a soft and fizzy, almost cola-like, accord at first before quickly becoming more noticeable, along with hints of the floral notes: immortelle provides a honey and dry hay accord, while the heliotrope contributes a slight almond accord. Gets sweeter as it dries down but fairly linear. Moderate projection for 2-3hr, longevity 9-11hr. 4/5
Angelique Noire (Guerlain) - Angelica provides a fresh green and musky opening overlaid with sweet pear and a hint of powdery vanilla underneath. Almost... like a dry green bar soap. Jasmine provides a light airy touch. I find the scent very linear and never detect much of the vanilla, this is really more of an angelica bomb to me. It's interesting but I don't love it. At least the performance is solid, I get moderate-strong projection for 2-3hr with 8-10hr longevity. 2.5/5
Vanilla Woods (The 7 Virtues) - Light, sweet caramel opening. Hints of a watery pear quickly fade to a creamy amber where it stays. Very simple but effective scent, definitely a gourmand. I never detect the rose note in here, it's just caramel. Moderate projection for 2-3hr, longevity 7-9hr. 4/5
Oud Wood (Tom Ford) To my nose it's a lighter, more polite version of Oud For Greatness. Lightly woody and sweet-spicy opening with a hefty camphorous, almost jasmine-like, airiness to it. Not too sweet, not terribly pungent, very well-balanced. Just enough dusting of spices to give it some added lift from the skin. Linear drydown. Moderate projection for 2-3hr, longevity 8-10hr. 4/5
I was content to stop after the Guerlains, but I couldn't let hype beast Unknown Pleasures go unsniffed... 😩
Unknown Pleasures (Kerosene) - Opening is a sharp, slightly bitter lemon rind. Quickly loses most of that edge as it settles into a baked lemon bar, mixing in hints of vanilla with those natural sugars caramelizing. Moderate projection for the first hour, soft projection for 2-3hr total, skin scent for 5-6hr. I like the scent, but the performance leaves something to be desired I think. Very similar to Xerjoff Lira, which I ultimately prefer and is a few reviews down. 4/5
Vanille Havane (Les Indemodables) - Opens with a boozy, dry tobacco leaf underlaid with a healthy dose of warm, rich chocolate and vanilla. Moderately sweet at first, after 30 minutes dries down to include a prominent amber accord and the leather comes in to aid the fading tobacco with a fuzzy/powdery touch. I'm not a huge tobacco fan but this stuff is fantastic, right up there with JTC 400 as my favorite by far, though the vanilla is a role player here. Moderate-strong projection for 2-3hr, longevity 8-10hr. 5/5
Divine Vanille (Essential Parfums) - Sweet vanilla and osmanthus, which adds a floral touch with peachy undertones. The faintest dusting of spices give it a slightly dry, powdery feel. The spices and lurking tonka bean give a sort of tobacco-like accord, making this similar to a tobacco-vanilla fragrance with the balance heavily toward vanilla. Conceptually reminds me of JTC 400 with the way it accents its primary accord (vanilla here, honey + tobacco in 400) with floral and fruity accords. Like 75% vanilla, 10% spicy, 10% floral, 5% fruity. Moderate initial projection quickly softens to an intimate scent bubble over 2-3hr total, longevity 6-8hr. 4.5/5

• Excellent, authentic vanilla gourmand. The cinnamon really sells it as something to get warm + cozy with. Performance isn't great but it's surprisingly cheap for a niche fragrance -- at only $75/100mL (currently) it's cheaper than some higher-end designers, like Dior Addict or Armani Code Absolu -- and purchases support a great company that makes heavy use of sustainable naturals and packaging. Also, people compare this a lot to PdM Herod and Guerlain SDV but I don't think it smells especially similar to either. This is its own scent, and it's very good. Influenced by the price, I went ahead and bought a bottle.

Ganymede (Marc-Antoine Barrois) - Recent hype beast, not a vanilla gourmand. Anyway, the opening is a sparkling, mineralic suede kind of thing with a light touch of fruitiness, primarily orange. Effervescent, but more rock salt than a fine mist. Like tiny bismuth crystals coated in orange oil buffeting your olfactory receptors. Smooths out a bit over time, becoming straight metallic as a skin scent. I would broadly say this evokes the "weird outer space" vibe many other reviews mention. It's clean and sterile, but like a cleanroom in a research lab rather than a hospital. Very intentionally synthetic, cold and alien. Projects softly at first, peaks in strength ~1hr in, and peters out after ~3hr. Longevity 7-9hr. Pretty good, even more interesting and unique. 4/5
B683 Extrait (Marc-Antoine Barrois) - Opens with a powerful blast of earthy, woody oud lifted by lighter notes of green apple, violet leaves, and spices. The safraleine adds a hint of smooth suede, while the apple and vanilla add a touch of sweetness. I would consider this a lighter and more pleasant take on Oud for Greatness, while smelling less synthetic and more rounded than Oud Wood. Woody and leathery but well-balanced by the lighter notes. Gets just a smidge sweeter and more leathery as it dries down. Nuclear projection for 4-5hr, longevity 10-12hr. 3.5/5 personal score, 5/5 objective score.

• I accidentally sprayed this on myself when I went to spray myself down with a second round of Ganymede. My mom smelled me through the wall in the next room over and immediately asked me what the heck I was spraying on myself. 😂 This is seriously potent juice, right up there with Oud Satin Mood Extrait as arguably the strongest I've ever tried.

Vanilla Reve (Shalini) - Light and airy vanilla sponge cake with a hint of spices. The floral notes can be vaguely made out, but they mostly serve to lift the composition so the vanilla isn't overly dense. Dries down to a pure creamy vanilla as the supporting notes fade over time. Strong projection for 2-3hr, longevity 10-12hr.

• A very pure vanilla gourmand. It's good, and I'll give it credit for having very solid performance, but dear Lord is this stuff absolutely disgustingly overpriced. Divine Vanille is literally more than TEN times cheaper by volume and that's if you buy the largest bottle of Vanille Reve. Sure, DV is a little less versatile because the cinnamon makes it a warmer composition and the performance isn't as strong, but you can practically bathe in the stuff compared to this. I personally prefer the scent of DV anyway because I'm a cinnamon fanatic, but I suppose if you put a gun to my head I'd say this was better overall. It's just you're paying a 1000%+ premium for that last 1% of fragrance superiority, in true luxury fashion.

Italica (Xerjoff) - Opening smells like almond toffee cookies, or marzipan, with a hint of fruitiness. Some say cherries, which I sorta get. A very artificial, almost medicinal, cherry unfortunately, though it's not prominent. Dense and dry. Becomes a creamy, milky vanilla-caramel sort of thing as it dries down with a gentle hint of spices. Moderate initial projection quickly settles into a soft bubble for ~2hr, longevity 5-7hr. 1.5/5 Sad to say I just don't like it. The almond is too bitter and the composition is too dry.
Amber Star (Xerjoff) - Spicy, woody amber opening. Rich balsams, a touch of vanillic sweetness, the faintest glimmer of animalic undertones. Ylang-ylang adds a yellow floral touch after a few minutes, then it's linear. Moderately strong projection for 2-3hr, limping through a fourth hour, longevity 9-11hr. 4/5
Lira (Xerjoff) - Sugary sweet lemon, a touch of vanilla, and a healthy dose of caramel. Sorta lemon bar-esque if you imagine the caramel note comes from natural sugars browning during baking, like Unknown Pleasures, but UP is less caramel and the lemon is more a bitter rind than sweet flesh. Lira uses Bergamot and Blood Orange so I don't know why it still smells like lemon, but whatever! Anyway, Lira dries down to pure, creamy caramel as a skin scent. Moderate projection for the first hour, soft projection for 2-4hr total, longevity 5-7hr. 4.5/5 Also similar to Ex Idolo Love & Crime -- review further below -- which comes across more orangey and adds a cocoa note. Lira's kind of in between UP and L&C. I prefer L&C among the three, which also has the best performance off my skin.
Alexandria II (Xerjoff) - I decided it was time to finally try the darling of Xerjoff's collection. Opens with a strong soapy lavender backed by a crisp, juicy apple dusted with cinnamon and a woody base. Base notes slowly become more prominent as it dries down, becoming sweeter with a light, airy almost jasmine-like or medicinal lift from the oud, blending in with but never completely overtaking the top/mid. Strong projection for 2-3hr, faint whiffs many hours later, longevity 12hr+. 5/5

• I'd say this was nothing like I imagined, but to be honest I never actually bothered to read reviews and build any sort of image in my head of what this was "supposed" to smell like. It's excellent. I think it's extremely versatile being a fairly fresh soapy scent, not something that needs to be particularly avoided in hot weather or daytime, but it's not as boring as something like a Prada L'Homme or the typical minimalist scent because the woody base is noticeable and there's a fair bit of sweetness permeating the composition. The oud makes its presence known with the way it lifts everything else but it always stays in the background, combining its woody element with the other woody notes present and never revealing its more typical earthy/dirty, strong spicy, or heaven forbid fecal facets. Strangely, I have no particular impetus to buy a bottle, but in some alternate universe I have a one-fragrance collection and this is my signature scent.

Cavatina (Dusita) - A flouish of sparkling green florals: a champagne fizziness, fresh cut flower stems, and a rather indolic jasmine. I never really get much of the base notes coming in but it has this weird musky, powdery undertone that might be coming from the sandalwood in here that gives me vibes similar to Angelique Noire. Strong initial projections settles slightly over 2-3hr, longevity 6-8hr. 2.5/5
Love & Crime (Ex Idolo) - Citrusy chocolate-vanilla caramel. Very similar to Lira but this is more orangey and adds a hint of cocoa, and as such also a close cousin to Unknown Pleasures. Has floral notes that I can vaguely pick out, but I wouldn't notice them if I wasn't told they were there. Not much else to say about it, the cocoa is a nice added touch in the "caramel gourmand" space that makes me prefer this one over the rest. I also get better performance out of this one, a very consistent moderate-soft projection over 3-4hr off my skin, longevity 8-10hr. Lira and UP start out stronger but die down quicker and don't last as long. 4.5/5
Tihota (Indult) - Milky, creamy vanilla. There's perhaps a slight warmth about it, maybe a touch of nuttiness, but otherwise I don't get anything else in the way of secondary accords. It just smells like melted vanilla ice cream at room temperature. One of my friend's two favorites (the other is L&C, which we agree on) and she thinks it's very masculine, heh. Also probably the most pure vanilla of the bunch along with Vanilla Reve, but I just think it's okay. Moderate projection for 2-3hr, longevity 6-8hr. 4/5
Vanitas (Profumum Roma) - Sweet vanilla opening, with a spritz of bitter citrus that quickly turns syrupy sweet. Dunno if I'd peg it as raspberry as many other reviews do, though, more artificial strawberry to my nose. Offputtingly sweet. Moderate-strong projection for ~2hr, soft projection through 3-4hr, longevity 8-10hr. 2/5
Vaniglia (Mazzolari) - Candy sweet floral caramel. It only has three notes -- vanilla, caramel, orchid -- and that's what it smells like. There's not a whole lot of depth here. Becomes more pure caramel, losing the orchid and over-sweetness, as it dries down. Soft projection for 2-3hr, longevity 6-8hr. 3.5/5
Note Vanillee (M. Micallef) - Here it is... almost the very last one. Basically everything SDV was supposed to be. Strong boozy vanilla with a gentle splash of citrus on top and the faintest hint of creamy, powdery sandalwood beneath, all elevated by an airy jasmine. Smoother, boozier SDV. The jasmine blooms more over time, however, eventually becoming the dominant accord deep in the drydown. Moderate-soft projection for ~2hr, longevity 5-6hr. 5/5

• I need to get a decant of this to better assess the performance and see if it's worth adding the bottle to my collection, but it's certainly not as poor as SDV and the scent is to die for. These last four samples were from Luckyscent, so I didn't really have enough juice to spray them as freely as I normally would.

Tuxedo (Yves Saint Laurent) - Alright, time to finally give this hype beast a shot. Well, where's the vanilla? A dominant violet leaf takes a kinda sweet (probably the vanilla with facets of the patchouli), kinda earthy, kinda floral composition and gives it a hefty ozonic, borderline medicinal, airiness. Or maybe it's the ambroxan cuz it has this sort of nondescript sweetness, in the vein of BR540, but more candied. Meh. Soft projection for ~90min, longevity 5-6hr. 2.5/5
And just because I got free samples of these through the mail in the meantime...
Le Male Le Parfum (Jean Paul Gaultier) - A balanced mix of sweet vanilla, powdery iris and aromatic, almost soapy, lavender with a touch of cardamom sparkling off the skin. Moderate-strong initial projection dies down to a small bubble over 2-3hr, longevity 8-10hr. 3.5/5
Phantom (Paco Rabanne) - Vanillic sweet fruity, aromatic opening. Smells like apples and lemon most prominently, with lavender swirling about. Like a sweeter, even more synthetic Eros with no mint. It's not bad at first but the more I smell it the more I dislike it, as it's somewhat headache-inducing. Moderately strong projection mellows slightly over ~3hr, longevity 8-10hr. 2/5
If you want my quick opinion on cheap designer vanillas, you would see from my previous topics that I have owned Armani Code Absolu and Spicebomb Extreme in the past. I've also given a number of others a quick sniff or two through my local department stores. IMO:
Divine Vanille (hint of warmth and fruits)
=-=-=
Code Absolu (powdery, pure vanilla)
Prada LR Black (darker, slightly spicy amber)
SBE (spicier tobacco-vanilla, best performing)
Le Male Le Parfum (most aromatic)
=-=-=
Code EDP (more citrus and aromatic, less vanilla)
=-=-=
=-=-=
Phantom (very fruity, but sickly sweet and synthetic)
 
And of course, I can't forget the definitely not vanilla...
Reflection 45 (Amouage) -- Not merely stronger than Reflection Man. This is richer, woodier, more aromatic. It's a solid scent that maintains the fundamental scent profile, but like BR540 Extrait compared to BR540 EDP this kinda misses the mark for me. I love Reflection Man for how bright, fresh, and airy it is but 45 rather "fills in the holes" of the white florals with a bunch of sweet aromatics and woods that take away from the uniqueness of the Reflection DNA by making it more dense, more sweet, more generic. Strong initial projection settles down over 2-3hr, longevity 12hr+. The projection isn't much better, but it sticks around as a skin scent significantly longer. 4/5
Worth $500? Not for me.
 
... But wait! There's more! Shoutouts to Indigo Perfumery for sending me bonus samples with my initial sample order, plus another with my purchase of a full bottle of Divine Vanille.
African Rooibos (Chris Collins) - Piercing lime and smoke opening, which immediately settles down into a vaguely sweet, slightly dry and chalky up close, tea note with a touch of lime and herbs. Tea isn't a common note, so the only comparable fragrance I'm familiar with is Nishane Colognise but they aren't very similar. The immortelle becomes more prominent as it settles, pushing the composition to be sweeter and more dry. Moderate projection for ~3hr, strengthening through the first hour, longevity 12hr+. 2.5/5
Vetiver Santal (Marie Jeanne) - Opens with a gentle, not-too-sweet lemony spritz on a slightly green dry brush vetiver. This citrus quickly settles atop a creamy sandalwood and earthy patchouli. Slightly soapy, mostly foresty, very linear scent. It's a nice smell all in all, leaning masculine and mature, but the performance is pretty bad for me. 12hr+ as a skin scent but I'm lucky to get maybe 90 minutes of soft projection out of it. 4/5
Jasmin Patchouli (Marie Jeanne) - Mostly an earthy, woody, fairly pungent patchouli with the jasmine serving to give it a smidge of lift. The dankness gives way to the jasmine more as it dries down. Very soft projection for ~1hr, longevity 12hr+. Lasts forever but is basically a skin scent from the first minute. 2/5
Quick reference:

• [5/5] Au Coeur du Desert, Vanille Havane, Alexandria II, Note Vanillee, Imperium
  
• [4.5/5] Divine Vanille, Vanilla Reve, Lira, Love & Crime
  
• [4/5] Spiritueuse Double Vanille, Cuir Beluga, Vanilla Woods, Oud Wood, Unknown Pleasures, Ganymede, Amber Star, Vetiver Santal, Tihota, Reflection 45
  
• [3.5/5] Ani, Tonka Imperiale, B683 Extrait, Vaniglia, Le Male Le Parfum
  
• [3/5] Lune Feline, Tobacco Vanille, Silky Woods
  
• [2.5/5] Angelique Noire, African Rooibos, Cavatina, Tuxedo
  
• [2/5] Velvet Amber Sun, Jasmin Patchouli, Vanitas, Phantom
  
• [1.5/5] Italica
  
• [1/5] N/A, this time...
  

No intended order within each tier, but Imperium and L&C are probably more like a 4.75 and ACDD is close to "Dior Homme Intense tier" (aka 5.5). 😛 Thanks to ScentSplit, DecantX, The Perfumed Court, Beverly Hills Perfumery, Indigo Perfumery, Luckyscent, and Xerjoff direct for samples.
I'm done actively seeking out more samples, but here's a running list I'd still like to sample in an ideal world:
Really want to try - Initio Absolute Aphrodisiac, Mercedes-Benz Club Black, Histoires de Parfums Ambre 114, Amber Heath Burberry, Dior Fahrenheit Le Parfum + Vanilla Diorama, Stéphane Humbert Lucas O Hira, Maitre Parfumeur et Gantier Ambre Precieux, TRNP Embers, Arabian Oud Arabian Knight + Kalemat + Kalemat Black.
I wouldn't mind trying - Argos Triumph of Bacchus, Dame Perfumery Black Flower Mexican Vanilla, Diptyque Eau Duelle, Ligne St. Barth Vanille West Indies, Lorga Ambre Platine, Kayali Vanilla 28, Profumum Dulcis in Fundo, M. Micallef Vanille Vanille, TF Vanille Fatale, Nishane Hundred Silent Ways, Frederic Malle Musc Ravageur, Lancome Lavandes Trianon, Mon Guerlain EDP Intense, L'Occitane Eau des Baux, Molinard Ambre + Vanille + Lavande, Jovoy Remember Me.
Running edit of notable scents I've managed to try since posting this:

• Sorriso (Profumum Roma) - Opening is offputting sharp, but it's a creamy chocolate that slowly transitions to a woody vanilla. Crazy good performance, and smells nice once it dries down, but that opening is a no-go. 2/5
  
• Angels' Share (By Kilian) - Boozy and woody vanilla praline with a hint of cinnamon; I wish the booze was as strong on skin as it seems on paper. Slight apple pie vibe, though not as strongly nor as artificial as Ambre Narguile. Goes powdery in the drydown. Moderate performance. 4/5
  
• Hermessence Ambre Narguile (Hermes) - Honey, heavy cinnamon, and a bit of apple. Not so much an apple pie as it is an apple pie-scented candle, it has a waxy and dare I say synthetic smell to it. Moderate performance. 3/5
  
• Symphonium (Xerjoff) - Decadent chocolate orange, but it's an actual fresh orange dipped in dark milk chocolate rather than a cheap Terry's Chocolate Orange. Dries down to include some vanilla and woods. This is the gourmand I was always looking for, though to the point of the topic focusing on vanilla I will say this is mostly chocolate. Excellent performance as well! 5/5
  
• Feve Delicieuse (Dior) - Like a warm spiced eggnog with touches of lavender and jasmine. Well balanced composition of warm creamy vanilla and chocolate, a melange of holiday spices, plus hints of nuttiness and cherry flavoring. Reminiscent of Tonka Imperiale with the green facets replaced by cocoa. Solid performance. 4.5/5
  
• 1888 (Xerjoff) - Warm woody amber with spicy floral accents. Touches of leathery saffron, sweet and fruity ylang-ylang, and a smooth pepper. Carnation and the heavy woods give it a slightly masculine lean. Kinda smells like Starlight but it gets more powdery and floral as it dries down. Solid performance. 4.5/5
  
• Whispers in the Library (Maison Margiela) - Opens kinda musty but airs out quickly. More or less smells like a bucket of wet wood pulp with a splash of vanilla extract, lacquer, and a dash of black pepper. It's papery and woody, with an air of gentle sweetness. I actually like it a lot, it's rather light and clean. A bit soft projecting, it seems, but decent longevity. Not gourmand at all. 4.5/5
  
• Sultan (Royal Crown) - If Symphonium was the cocoa gourmand I didn't know I wanted, this is the vanilla I was seeking all along. It's a warm, balsamic, slightly creamy vanilla-amber with the perfect hints of added sweetness and smokiness. Has undertones of dried fruits and smells of a gentle incense or burning wood chips. It's not as spicy or smoky as Lune Feline, not as cloyingly sweet as Tobacco Vanille, not as plain as Tihota or Grand Soir. Solid performance. 5/5
  
• Code Absolu Gold (Armani) - Beautiful sweet vanilla-iris garnished with a fresh, fizzy orange-apple top. Somewhere between OG Absolu and Le Male Le Parfum: not as powdery or purely vanillic as the former, not as aromatic as the latter without any lavender to bolster the iris. The woody and suede base is a bit more prominent as well, giving it shades of Dior Homme Intense with ~55% of the iris traded in for vanilla. The best of the designers IMO, comparable to Divine Vanille. Moderate performance. 4.5/5
  
• L'Air du Desert Marocain (Tauer) - Basically Au Coeur du Desert (scroll up) with +10% more herbs, -10% less amber, -10% performance. Ultimately I prefer ACDD, but they're close enough to be redundant and LDDM is 40% cheaper. 5/5
  
• Resala (Arabian Oud) - The famed, uber-hyped chocolate gourmand. But this isn't a chocolate gourmand at all, no, it's just another rose-oud fragrance with a slight dusting of cocoa powder. Nonetheless, it's chocolatey enough to be noticeable and adds a unique twist to an otherwise basic scent profile. Vanilla in the base adds a warm, creamy undertone that smooths out the oud and saffron. Like a combo of Oud for Greatness + Oud Satin Mood Extrait. Excellent performance, with a nuclear opening but more moderate drydown. 5/5
  
• Ambre Sultan (Serge Lutens) - Warm vanilla-amber with a hefty dose of uplifting but medicinal bay leaf and a melange of dusty spices that give it an herbal and slightly powdery feel. Dry aromatic scent, similar to Tauer LDDM/ACDD but a bit sweeter plus the bay leaf. Solid performance. 4/5
  
• Gentle Fluidity Gold (MFK) - Warm, slightly powdery amber-vanilla but a hefty dose of juniper berries provides a fresh fruitiness and fizzy pop to the entire composition. Like a full glass of gin and tonic, crisp and clear, garnished with a little wooden plate of vanilla pods, warm resins, and tiny dusting of spices floating on top. Solid performance. 4.5/5
  
• Amyris Homme EDT (MFK) - Orange citrus and fresh aromatic opening quickly settles into a soft iris with creamy vanillic undertones courtesy of tonka bean. Gets sweeter as it dries down, kinda like a fresher Code Absolu Gold with less woods. Solid performance. 5/5
  
• Amyris Homme Extrait (MFK) - A more full-bodied version of the EDT. Not as big a difference as you might think going from EDT concentration to Extrait, as while it's more dense this also retains more of the fresh orange as it dries down. Like a floral creamsicle. Performance remains roughly the same, if not actually slightly worse. 5/5
  
• Fahrenheit Le Parfum (Dior) - Smells like Vanilla Coke to me, heavy on vanilla. A warm, fizzy dark cola with an interesting mix of creamy and powdery notes, a heaping dose of buttery smooth vanilla beneath the fizzy orange and pop of spices on top. Dries down to vanillic suede as a skin scent. Almost like a combo of Armani Code Profumo + Absolu. Moderate performance. 4.5/5
  

Beyond excited as I just received 7 samples from 4160 Tuesday, a niche perfume house in the UK.
For context so you know whether your perfume preferences are similar to mine my favourite perfumes are Feve Delicieuse by Dior, Whispers in the Library by Replica, Bleu Turquoise by Armani, Bewitching Yasmin by Penhaligon's, Armani Si, and Lost Cherry by TF.
I thought I would share my thoughts (excuse the weird descriptions I am quite new to this):
- Rhubarb and Custard: described as a sharp gourmand scent which is a nod to Yorkshire Rhubarb Triangles. To me it smells like a beautiful but not overly sweet vanilla with a sharp fruity edge. It's a beautiful scent with a very slight old fashioned touch to it. 8/10
- Amberama: described as woods, amber and drop of raspberry. This is a warm and nostalgic scent. I am prone to getting headaches from certain scents and I think this is would be the type as it is so heavy. 6.5/10
- Creamy Vanilla Crumble: described as rich creamy custardness (is that even a word?) with notes of crumble and fresh tobacco and hay. This is like a more adult and smoky Rhubarb and Custard. It's rich and creamy and deep. I am in love. 9/10.
- The Dark Heart of Old Havana: described as jasmine, tobacco, sugary desserts, oranges and mangoes. Smells like a suave and slightly smoky gentleman's club where the men have been smoking cigars and enjoying some lavish desserts. It's a very deep and beautiful masculine smell. 8/10
- Captured by Candlelight: described as a plum pudding alight with brandy served in an oak-panelled dining room lit with beeswax candles. This is my first proper plum scent. It's a sweeter and fruitier Old Havana. Absolutely beautiful and boozy but perhaps a little bit too heavy for me. 7.5
- Sleep Knot: described as jasmine, sandalwood, ylang ylang and black pepper. Beautifully rich floral and woody scent. I don't know if this makes sense but for a floral perfume it feels very rich and dark with almost a smokiness to it. 8.10
- Another Kiss by the Fireside: described as wood fire, cinnamon biscuits, rose and lavender in a farmhouse kitchen. This is like a floral version of By the Fireplace. I cannot really smell the cinnamon biscuits. I like it but would choose the Replica scent over it. 7/10
Overall I am very impressed by these perfumes and would recommend this niche perfume house. The prices are decent too!

In 2020 I bought over $2500 worth of bottles, samples, and decants. Here are some of my thoughts. For reference a 5 is an average score with 6 being above average and 7 being pretty good. I’ll be honest I didn’t find a lot of scents I didn’t like. I'll also list if I bought a bottle, decant, or sample.
Dior Feve Delicieuse (9/10) – Cozy vibes. This is for when you’re at home snuggled up with your significant other. It’s so comforting and very delicious to wear. Decant
YSL Tuxedo (8/10) – Lots of hype lately but it’s always been good. Not the best scent ever and very pricey but none the less a very good scent and the best from YSL. Decant
Tom Ford Lost Cherry (6/10) – Doesn’t last on me but has one the most beautiful cherry notes I’ve ever smelt. Love the smell but hate the performance. Sample
Creed Green Irish Tweed (8/10) – This scent is from the 80s yet still manages to stay modern. Green grass on the Irish countryside is the perfect description. Bought it
Initio Atomic Rose (9/10) – A realistic and wearable rose scent I have tried. This is a modern take on rose and will last you all day easily. Bought it
Amouage Lyric Man (7/10) – The smell is great, but my GF thinks it smells like a grandma. My major issue is that this does not last very well on me. My lady hated this. Sample
Fredric Malle Portrait of a Lady (7/10) – This is the most realistic rose scent on the market but it's damn near unwearable for someone under 50. This pure art but can’t imagine some wanting to smell like this outside. Sample
Parfums De Marly Delina Exclusif (9/10) – Beautiful rose scent for women. This doesn’t have any rough edges and would make an amazing signature scent for women. Sample
Initio Side Effect (10/10) – To smell this good should be a crime. This is a perfection as a unisex scent. Rum, Tobacco, and Vanilla. You must get your nose on this scent. My lady loves this. Bought it
Parfums De Marly Layton (8/10) – Has a menthol smell like Vicks vapor rub but a really good scent that will get you compliments. It’s not super unique but definitely will impress people. Bought it
Parfums De Marly Herod (8/10) – The perfect tobacco and vanilla scent. Has average projection but good longevity. This is so much better than V&R Spicebomb Extreme or TF Tobacco Vanille. My lady loves this. Blind Bought it
Parfums De Marly Pegasus (8/10) – Slight metallic vibe but mainly the men’s version of Hypnotic Poison. Almond and Vanilla the stars and is perfect for someone who wants a fragrance to smell light and airy in the winter but with good performance. Bought it
Parfums De Marly Galloway (7/10) – This isn’t everyone’s favorite because it’s simple. I get that but it’s by far the easiest fragrance to wear from this house. Pepper and musk are what you get and that can be boring for others. Bought it
Parfums De Marly Percival (6/10) – Mont Blanc Legend Intense or Abercrombie & Fitch Fierce. This what you are getting with this. So many other everyday scents on the market for cheaper Decant
Parfums De Marly Carlisle (9/10) – Smells like a mix of Layton, Oajan, Herod, and Habdan if I’m being honest. A very good performer and smells great in the cold months. Decant
Parfums De Marly Oajan (7/10) – You smell like apple pie. If that’s what you want to smell like, then is for you. For me it’s okay. Decant
Parfums De Marly Habadan (5/10) – Don’t get the hype. For the price this costs it feels like you’re wasting money if you were to buy this. It doesn’t feel well constructed. Decant
MFK Baccarat Rouge 540 (8/10) – Smells like cotton candy but with opulence. Not much can be said that hasn’t been said before but is sadly overdone and copied these days. Ariana Grande cloud smells very similar if looking for a cheap alternative. Bought it
MFK Oud Satin Mood (10/10) – This will make anyone smell amazing. Amazing performance and smells expensive. This scent is an Oud, Rose, and vanilla combo out of the many that will make you stand out. Sample
MFK Grand Soir (9/10) – Amber and Vanilla. Sounds simple but makes a lasting impression. Once again MFK knows how to make you smell rich and expensive. Easy scent to wear in the winter. Blind Bought it
Initio Oud for Greatness (7/10) – Smells amazing for sure. Scent and performance are great, too great. This stuff is really strong and makes it hard to ever wear. A full bottle will last you an eternity. The score isn’t indicative of the smell but also the value. Bought it
Initio Blessed Baraka (8/10) – Easy to wear amber and musk scent. Great performance and compared to OFG you’re going to reach for this far more. It can feel a little meh initially but gets better the overtime. Bought it
Nishane Ani (9/10) – I call this a lemon sponge cake. This is definitely a gourmand and has one of the best vanilla dry downs on the market. Lady loves this one. Blind Bought it
Nishane Hacivat (8/10) – The initial sprays of this feels like a harsh version of Aventus. This stuff is strong and too much can cause a headache. Dries down to a wonderful woody aromatic scent that differs from Aventus which thankfully make it not a clone. Blind Bought it
Savoir Faire Soul Café (9/10) – Black-owned fragrance house with a standout fragrance. For the price, this is easily worth the score. If this had Dior on the bottle this would be winning a Fifi award. Blended so well I can’t even describe the scent. Blind Bought it
Dior Spice Blend (4/10) – Smells really good but vanishes after the first hour. The price you pay is definitely not worth what you’re going to get. I now see why no one talks about this scent. You get a fresh spicy scent but not worth the disappointment. Sample
BDK Gris Charnel (6/10) – Opens up amazing then falls flat fast. Also has mediocre performance unfortunately. A fresh woody scent that honestly matches a day when the sky is gray. Sadly disappointed. Decant
Acqua Di Parma Sandalo (9/10) – Sandalwood, sandalwood, sandalwood. This scent is simple yet so fantastic. This is worth every penny and it’s truly sad no one talks about this. This is better than Le Labo Santal 33. Decant
Acqua Di Parma Fico Di Amalfi & Arancia Di Capri (5/10) – They smell good but the performance is so bad. You will be spraying them every 3 hours, unfortunately.Fig and orange respectively. Decants
Acqua Di Parma Mirto Di Panera (6/10) – A blue scent but with the unique note myrtle. This unfortunately still doesn’t stand out enough and the performance is okay. Decant
Acqua Di Parma Quercia (7/10) – A nice clean woody scent with spices but feels a bit boring compared to everything else on this list. None the less still a good scent. Decant
Acqua Di Parma Leather (4/10) – You have to want the most realistic leather scent to like this. It’s just way too realistic for me to pull off. Decant
Acqua Di Parma Colonia (3/10)– classic but good for collection purposes. Hard to pull this one off in 2021. I do wear it to the gym. My lady hates this
Acqua Di Parma Pura (8/10) – Love this scent. Take the original and keep it bright and modernize the scent and you get this. Wonderful to wear on a nice spring or summer day.
Byredo Oud Immortel (8/10) – OFG but far more wearable. This can even be pulled off in the spring. Oud and Limoncello are the main players here and who knew they would make such a good combo. Decant
Mancera Aoud Vanilla (4/10) – The opening is headache-inducing and smells unpleasant from the oud. The deep dry down has amazing vanilla but to get to it takes a lot of time to get to it. Decant
Mancera Velvet Vanilla (7/10) – On me, this smells like the color pink. I wouldn’t buy this but for a gift for a woman, I feel like this would be 9/10. Bubblegum is what I smell but it's balanced so well. Sample and Bought as a gift
Mancera Black Vanilla (8/10) – This is a cozy a creamy vanilla that smells so good. It’s not feminine as people say but it has florals. It’s Vanilla extract with flowers basically. Decant
Mancera Instant Crush (8/10) – This what you want if you want a clubbing scent. This stuff is so good and is definitely different from BR540. Performance is amazing as well. Decant
Mancera Aoud Lemon Mint (9/10) – Smells super synthetic but smells really good. Nothing smells like this. Very unnatural but will easily make you the best smelling guy in the building.
Mancera Lemon Line (5/10) – You will smell like lemonheads. Performs well but isn’t the most interesting smell on the market. Decant
Mancera Roses Vanille (9/10) – Easily one of the best fragrances a woman can own. Roses and Vanilla blended perfectly. Decant
Montale Oudmazing (9/10) – This makes scents like Ultramale seem cheap and boring. This has so much going on. Grapes, fig, Oud, rose. An amazing scent which I like to call the cheap version of MFK Oud Satin Mood
Montale Sensual Instant (9/10) – Smells nothing like Baccarat Rouge. This stuff is sexy. Would make a sexy date night scent, club scent, or everyday scent. Montale is on fire rn. Blind Bought
Montale Instant Café (9/10) – Read the above. This is more rose dominant than Sensual Instinct. Blind Bought it.
Carner Barcelona Tardes (5/10)- Boring and bland but not bad either. Perfect for someone who doesn’t want to stand out or a good office scent. Pales in comparison to El Born and Cuirs from the same house. Decant
Armani Prive Myrrh Imperial (8/10) – This is Grand Soir with myrrh on the top notes. Dries down to be the same fragrance.

My girlfriend is 17, almost 18. I met her when she started playing in our sports team (Our sport is boys & girls mixed.) We were friends and we started dating at the end of the summer vacation.
I had no idea she had a really tough time in school and in her previous sports team. Her friends dropped her all of a sudden. She had an incident where a picture of her in her bra was spread throughout the school and a lot of people were fake friends with her, bullied and mentally abused her. Her mom found out about the picture and chatted with the culprits. The culprits made her mother believe that my gf was the one to blame and that really broke her.
The period of exams right before the summer in which we started dating she had it really rough. Her parents were constantly angry for seemingly no reason at all. They didn't trust her and often blamed her for things she didn't do. It really drained her mentally. At this point she felt terrible and powerless. She started self harming sometimes to cope with her pain at the time . She couldn't focus on studying at all and failed two exams, because of that she had to redo that year as well, which also weighed her down a ton.
She cut herself a few times during these exams. She told my sister (who also plays in the same team) that she had cut herself a few times. My sister apparently reacted not in a very supporting manner. And was rather angry at her for having done this. This was the first person she had told this too.
When we got together I had no idea she was suffering this much, she told me about a month into our relationship. She seemed like a very happy jolly girl with no problems what so ever. She never told anyone about her problems. So everyone also thought of her as a very happy person. (we are together for a little over a year now).
She has had very low self esteem now for what's seems like ages and things aren't really getting better. She is very relieved to have me, because I fully understand her and she can say anything to me. And I have prevented her a lot from self harming again, by loving her and taking care and being there if she needs someone to talk to. I love her dearly.
She never dares to tell her parents/brothers anything, because they have completely wrong image of her and they have repeatedly expressed that they find self mutulaters "weak", "crazy" and "cowardly".
She has also had glandular fevee/mononucleosis for almost a year now. She was so helpless, because she couldn't see anyone outside of her family and me for a long time. She also had a lot of pain physically such has headaches, muscle aches and stomach pain for days on end. this also made her feel like absolute thrash and she cut herself again. I tried so hard to prevent that but couldn't in the end.
Corona virus also made her mental state worse, because again she didn't see me as often and was constantly with her family, faking being happy and hiding scars.
But for a time things seemed to be going better the mononucleosis was getting better and so was her mental state as a consequence. She was becoming more social again and felt better than before.
Recently things have gone down hill very fast hower. My sister told mutual friends of all us (they play in the team as well). That she and my mom think that I deserve a better girlfriend, and that they don't like her as my girlfriend and want us to break up. I never knew this. One of my gf's close friends from that group told this to my gf
She had always had low self esteem but it is at an all time low. And my sister told her side of the story to our mutual friend, and my gf feels betrayed because it made her seem like a bad person. She was also close to those mutual friends and she fears their friendship might change now. I also have thought about breaking up with her but that is because we both want different things in our relationship. These are different reasons than the ones my sister pointed out. And I have and will not break up with her because things would not go well if I did. I still love her very much tho, we're just not meant to be. But I don't want anything bad to happen to her because I still lover her so very much.
Yesterday we were chatting and I was motivating her to seek professional help (I have done this multiple times already) . I sent her a link via Facebook messenger of a site on which you can chat with people about your problems. Her mother saw that link on her messenger. Her mother than proceeded to read further into our previous chats and she saw messages where we talked about my gf's self harm.
Her mother than in a very angry manner inspected the arms of my gf. She luckily didn't see the scars as they are on the outside of her arm and she looked on the inside. She clearly suspected my gf to have self mutulated, but then looked her dead in the eye and said: "no you can't have done that of course, you are not so weak and stupid... And more insulting terms " Then her mother forced her to send messages to me via my gf's account. In which she forces my gf to tell me that all the self harm was a lie and a cry for attention. And that she was very stupid to have said such things for attention from me. I suspected hower after a period that this was in fact her mother messaging me, because of the writing style and the content of the messages. So I didn't say anything that made it seem like my gf did in fact had self mutulated. My gf could later confirm that it was indeed her mother.
Now my girlfriend hates her home, hates herself, has nowhere to go. She hates being at home, she doesn't like coming to my home because she knows my mother and sister don't really like her (although they don't show it, or at least my mother doesn't). She only feels moderately comfortable if she's with me. She told me yesterday that she could end this all very quickly but just doesn't because it would hurt me. I would like to be with her as often as possible, but I'm in uni (med school) (18 yrs old) and I often times don't have a lot of time. She is in her last year of high school.
I have no idea how to help er apart from loving her. I don't know how long she will be able to not do herself any harm.
We both don't know what to do.
.

My girlfriend is 17, almost 18. I met her when she started playing in our sports team (Our sport is boys & girls mixed.) We were friends and we started dating at the end of the summer vacation.
I had no idea she had a really tough time in school and in her previous sports team. Her friends dropped her all of a sudden. She had an incident where a picture of her in her bra was spread throughout the school and a lot of people were fake friends with her, bullied and mentally abused her. Her mom found out about the picture and chatted with the culprits. The culprits made her mother believe that my gf was the one to blame and that really broke her.
The period of exams right before the summer in which we started dating she had it really rough. Her parents were constantly angry for seemingly no reason at all. They didn't trust her and often blamed her for things she didn't do. It really drained her mentally. At this point she felt terrible and powerless. She started self harming sometimes to cope with her pain at the time . She couldn't focus on studying at all and failed two exams, because of that she had to redo that year as well, which also weighed her down a ton.
She cut herself a few times during these exams. She told my sister (who also plays in the same team) that she had cut herself a few times. My sister apparently reacted not in a very supporting manner. And was rather angry at her for having done this. This was the first person she had told this too.
When we got together I had no idea she was suffering this much, she told me about a month into our relationship. She seemed like a very happy jolly girl with no problems what so ever. She never told anyone about her problems. So everyone also thought of her as a very happy person. (we are together for a little over a year now).
She has had very low self esteem now for what's seems like ages and things aren't really getting better. She is very relieved to have me, because I fully understand her and she can say anything to me. And I have prevented her a lot from self harming again, by loving her and taking care and being there if she needs someone to talk to. I love her dearly.
She never dares to tell her parents/brothers anything, because they have completely wrong image of her and they have repeatedly expressed that they find self mutulaters "weak", "crazy" and "cowardly".
She has also had glandular fevee/mononucleosis for almost a year now. She was so helpless, because she couldn't see anyone outside of her family and me for a long time. She also had a lot of pain physically such has headaches, muscle aches and stomach pain for days on end. this also made her feel like absolute thrash and she cut herself again. I tried so hard to prevent that but couldn't in the end.
Corona virus also made her mental state worse, because again she didn't see me as often and was constantly with her family, faking being happy and hiding scars.
But for a time things seemed to be going better the mononucleosis was getting better and so was her mental state as a consequence. She was becoming more social again and felt better than before.
Recently things have gone down hill very fast hower. My sister told mutual friends of all us (they play in the team as well). That she and my mom think that I deserve a better girlfriend, and that they don't like her as my girlfriend and want us to break up. I never knew this. One of my gf's close friends from that group told this to my gf
She had always had low self esteem but it is at an all time low. And my sister told her side of the story to our mutual friend, and my gf feels betrayed because it made her seem like a bad person. She was also close to those mutual friends and she fears their friendship might change now. I also have thought about breaking up with her but that is because we both want different things in our relationship. These are different reasons than the ones my sister pointed out. And I have and will not break up with her because things would not go well if I did. I still love her very much tho, we're just not meant to be. But I don't want anything bad to happen to her because I still lover her so very much.
Yesterday we were chatting and I was motivating her to seek professional help (I have done this multiple times already) . I sent her a link via Facebook messenger of a site on which you can chat with people about your problems. Her mother saw that link on her messenger. Her mother than proceeded to read further into our previous chats and she saw messages where we talked about my gf's self harm.
Her mother than in a very angry manner inspected the arms of my gf. She luckily didn't see the scars as they are on the outside of her arm and she looked on the inside. She clearly suspected my gf to have self mutulated, but then looked her dead in the eye and said: "no you can't have done that of course, you are not so weak and stupid... And more insulting terms " Then her mother forced her to send messages to me via my gf's account. In which she forces my gf to tell me that all the self harm was a lie and a cry for attention. And that she was very stupid to have said such things for attention from me. I suspected hower after a period that this was in fact her mother messaging me, because of the writing style and the content of the messages. So I didn't say anything that made it seem like my gf did in fact had self mutulated. My gf could later confirm that it was indeed her mother.
Now my girlfriend hates her home, hates herself, has nowhere to go. She hates being at home, she doesn't like coming to my home because she knows my mother and sister don't really like her (although they don't show it, or at least my mother doesn't). She only feels moderately comfortable if she's with me. She told me yesterday that she could end this all very quickly but just doesn't because it would hurt me. I would like to be with her as often as possible, but I'm in uni (med school) (18 yrs old) and I often times don't have a lot of time. She is in her last year of high school.
I have no idea how to help er apart from loving her. I don't know how long she will be able to not do herself any harm.
We both don't know what to do.
.

yea papacito, today im wearing feve delicieuse from dior prive exclusive lines. it is lightly sweet but not gourmand. wont be headache or tooth ache inducing. has cardamom spices to mix up woth swwets