My husband and I are separated. Due to some temper issues. We have a 4 year old girl and a 4 month old son. 2 months ago I had enough while he was on his paternity leave with his temper. I will not allow my daughter to see this behavior towards her mother. I never want her to think it’s okay for a man to talk to a woman like that. Not just a man, but anyone to talk down to us. We just had the baby and we have our 4 year old daughter and he just couldn’t handle it. I kicked him out. I rather be alone with 2 kids. He left to stay with his parents fine. We haven’t talked much since. That’s fine. I’m not going to beg him to comeback. He just “assumes” everything is fine and I just need a break. On Saturday night I was furious that he didn’t even ask me to do anything for Mother’s Day. I only take care of our kids 24/7. And he is so oblivious that I don’t need him to communicate with me about what’s going on and what’s the next step? I told him I want your shit out of my house. I don’t want your crappy flowers the day of. I made plans with my mom and my kids bc you didn’t take the time to plan anything with m. He assumes I know what he plans to do. Is this normal? He also knows that I’m just there to take care of my kids and I don’t have a life. I am taken for granted. He just doesn’t communicate with me. And then when I’m pissed through a text he tells to im a “loose cannon” Okay, well I wouldn’t be so upset if we talked about what we are doing. This whole bullshit about me being crazy when I blow up is bc nothing happens when I stay quiet and it is beyond me. Why do we have to let it get to this point? Today he pretty much fixed everything I wanted. I’ve been needing a new car before my son was born 4 months ago, which we are going shopping for tomorrow.. I’ve needed access to OUR bank accounts which happened today. I’m SAHM mom and he has been able to “hold” that over me. But no more. Why? Does a shitty Mother’s Day have to be what it takes to get us mad enough to get results?

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1. Claire Vs. Frank Underwood
2. J.D. As A Father
3. Donna & Eric
4. Charlie Becoming A Mature Responsible Man
5. Mike & Rachel Becoming Top New York Lawyers
6. Amy's Career Journey
7. Rachel & Finn On Broadway
8. Wally West As Kid Flash
9. Roy Harper On Team Arrow
10. House & Cuddy's Relationship

Link to article

I have new to me 2021 4runner and have been looking to disable all the big brother data stuff. Someone on this forum helped me with connected services - essentially how does a new owner revoke consent
BUT- this was new to me.
I also came across text in the owner’s manual (page 9 for 2021 4runner) that the truck stores images that can be given to law enforcement (no mention of subpoena) or in a Toyota lawsuit. This storage can be deleted snd disabled by the dealer. I happened to be in the dealership today and requested it. there was one guy who knew what I was asking about. I’m not sure if they actually did turn it off. I don’t have the truck back yet, but I’ll come back here and provide an update.
I really see no reason for Toyota to have pictures of my driveway

I genuinely do not understand how they pulled off the entire New Years section of the movie. Like the taxi driver LA scenes where they're just burning the town down are crazy enough. You can kinda get the full picture there, but that whole last 45 minutes? It's crazy that they were filming all that with those actors and what looked like at least 1000 plus extras just losing their friggin minds in a giant mosh pit of bodies and concerts and military and swat guys just all over the place pushing each other. How people weren't hooting and hollering in the aisles when that section of the movie comes is beyond me. I was watching it in total awe of the scale of practicality. And then Kathryn Bigalow hits you with like three or four of the coolest images put to screen with Angela Bassestt and Vincent D'nofrio.
The cyberpunk aspect is cool, but they really were ahead of their time with the whole POV angle. That's like 60 percent of pornography now. I think the only chink in this things armor is the love of cops and the whole ending where the good law enforcement guys prevail. That was total bunk, but it's like god damn, i'm not gonna discount this movie on a bad last minute with the cops proving they're still good.

A good night so far, cashed #1 MLB play Phillies and NBA top play Celtics 1st half. Smaller game bet busted by a point on a ridiculous buzzer shot. Hopefully Mavs keep playing like they did in the 1st half up 10 for a really good night!
Hope everyone tailng cashed tonight. Let me know.
Thank you in advance to those who say thanks and tip when they hit.
MLB-5-2 (Cash #1 Top/3 Top plays)
NBA=1-1 (1-0 top plays)
NHL=
MLB=11-12 Sun (Cash #!)/11-11 Sat (Cash top 2)/12-11 Fri (7-4 Top)/4-7 Thurs/11-10 Wed/11-9 Tues (Cash Top 5)/12-5 Mon (7-1 Top)/10-12 Sun/13-8 Sat (7-3 Top)/5-14 Fri/5-4 Thurs/13-8 Wed (Cash top 6 straight/12-10 Tues (Cash #1)/8-8 Mon (6-3 Top)/7-12 Sun (6-4 Top)/13-9 Sat (6-4 Top)/9-9 Fri (5-4 Top)/7-5 Thurs/14-6 Wed (9-2 TOP)/15-8 Sun (9-3 Top plays)/
452-387 YTD/ (244-175 Top plays)
*All plays are standard bets unless adorned with a star. Those adorned with a star are TOP Plays.*Top plays are listed in order of strength.
⭐️Phillies-115-W
⭐️Brewers-133
⭐️Boston-113-L
⭐️Orioles-1-110-L
⭐️Tigers-1-105-Push
⭐️Arizona-135
⭐️Royals+135
⭐️Angels-105
⭐️Guardians/Rangers Over 8-130
⭐️Oakland/Houston Over 8.5-115-W
Cubs+0.5-125 (F5/First 5 innings + RL)-W
Guardians+105
Padres-1-145
Gigantes+1.5-105
Cincy/Arizona Over 8-130
Phillies/Mutts Over 7.5-104-W
Marlin/Tigers Over 8-115-W
Rocks/Padres Over 7.5-130
NBA=2-2 Sun/2-3 Sat/1-4 Fri (1-1 Top)/1-2 Thurs/1-1 Wed/3-1 Tues (2-0 Top)/2-2mon (2-0 Top)/2-0 Sun/1-1 Sat(Cash #1 top)/3-0 Fri/3-1 Thurs/2-2 Wed/1-4 Tues/3-3 Mon (Cash #1)/5-3 Sun (4-1 Top)/5-2 Sat (3-0 Top)/4-2 Fri/5-0 Thurs/2-3 Wed/2-4 Tues/3-5 Mon/2-4 Sun/3-3 Sat (Cash top 2)/6-3 Wed/10-5 Tues (4-2 Top)/7-7 Sun (Cash top 2)/5-2 Sat (3-0 Top)/7-2 Mon (5-0 Top)/7-4 Sun (Cash 3/4 Top))/6-3 Sun (Cash 2 top)/6-5 Sat (Cash 3/4 Top)/7-3 Tues (Cash 3/4 Top)/9-4 Wed (Cash 3/4 Top)/7-3 Thurs (Cash 3/4 top)/10-2 Wed/6-2 Mon/7-1 mon/5-2 Wed (Cash 2/3 top plays)/4-1 Mon (cash 3/4 top plays)/787-700 YTD
⭐️Mavericks ML-115
⭐️Celtics-4-120 (First Half)-W
Celtics-8-114-L
ThundeMavs Over 213-118
NHL=0-2-1 Sun/1-2 Sat/2-1 Fri/1-2 Thurs (Cash #1)/2-1 Wed/1-2 Tues/0-1 Mon/2-1 Sun/1-0 Sat/0-3 Fri/0-1 Thurs/2-1 Wed/2-4 Tues/2-1 Mon/4-2 Sun (2-1 Top)/1-4 Sat (Cash #1)/3-3 Fri (2-1 Top)/4-1 Sun (Cash top 2)/3-0 Sat/4-3 Thurs/5-1 Sun/4-2 Friday (2-1 Top)/6-1 Fri/6-3 Thurs (3-1 Top)/4-2 Wed (2/3 Top)/5-3 Tues (Cash #1)/6-0 SUN/8-4 Sat/2-0 Fri/5-1 Sun (Cash 2/2 Top)/7-4 Sat (Cash 3 Top)/7-4 Thurs (Cash 3/4 Top plays)/4-1 Wed (3-0 Top)/6-3 Tues (Cash top 2 plays)/7-2 Sat/4-0 Fri/7-5 Sat/4-2 Friday/6-0 Sun/6-5 Sat/3-1 Fri/3-1 Wed/4-2 Tues/2-1 Sun/11-0 Sat/663-635 YTD
⭐️Colorado-134
⭐️Hurricanes/Rags Over 5.5-102-L
New York Rags-106-L
Dallas/Colorado Over 6-135
My picks/analysis/answering questions is and will remain free- but if you’ve been crushing the books with me, would you consider a tip for my time and effort? (and keep wife off back ha!)
As always Tips are NEVER expected but GREATLY appreciated to the newborn diaper fund/medical bills for wife.
Venmo=@ECU03 (LAST 4 DIGITS IF IT ASKS=5029)
PayPal=@superbae
Cashapp=$Alew1980

1. What will you be doing with this PC? Be as specific as possible, and include specific games or programs you will be using.
   

2. Music Production as in Fl studio and Playing AAA games like Cod,Rdr2 etc to indie games found steam at 1440p with the best frame rate possible with live streaming of sorts
   

3. What is your maximum budget before rebates/shipping/taxes?
   

4. $1500 BUT willing to above budget to $1700 but mainly $1500 is the goal
   

5. When do you plan on building/buying the PC? Note: beyond a week or two from today means any build you receive will be out of date when you want to buy.
   

6. within the next 90 days i want to build this pc
   

7. What, exactly, do you need included in the budget? (ToweOS/monitokeyboard/mouse/etc)
   

8. Tower
   

9. Which country (and state/province) will you be purchasing the parts in? If you're in US, do you have access to a Microcenter location?
   

10. North Carolina,USA and allegedly theres is a microcenter opening this month but it was delayed so no
    

11. If reusing any parts (including monitor(s)/keyboard/mouse/etc), what parts will you be reusing? Brands and models are appreciated.
    

12. everything new
    

13. Will you be overclocking? If yes, are you interested in overclocking right away, or down the line? CPU and/or GPU?
    

14. I dont think so?
    

15. Are there any specific features or items you want/need in the build? (ex: SSD, large amount of storage or a RAID setup, CUDA or OpenCL support, etc)
    

16. at least 2 tb storage/ best graphic card money can buy
    

17. Do you have any specific case preferences (Size like ITX/microATX/mid-towefull-tower, styles, colors, window or not, LED lighting, etc), or a particular color theme preference for the components?
    

18. Rgb tower(mid or full)
    

19. Do you need a copy of Windows included in the budget? If you do need one included, do you have a preference?
    

20. windows 11
    

I was doing a difficulty 7 mission and we had to extract 45 citizens, I though "This'll be fun!", and then we proceeded to get overwhelmed to the point were if we killed a strider another would show up instantly... I killed a tank, looked around and 2 new ones just materialized. My point is, how are we expected to do 2B bot kills and have fun when the avarage bot experience is Kill Wave > New one shows up instantly > Get overwhelmed > die?

A good night so far, cashed #1 MLB play Phillies and NBA top play Celtics 1st half. Smaller game bet busted by a point on a ridiculous buzzer shot. Hopefully Mavs keep playing like they did in the 1st half up 10 for a really good night!
Hope everyone tailng cashed tonight. Let me know.
Thank you in advance to those who say thanks and tip when they hit.
MLB-5-2 (Cash #1 Top/3 Top plays)
NBA=1-1 (1-0 top plays)
NHL=
MLB=11-12 Sun (Cash #!)/11-11 Sat (Cash top 2)/12-11 Fri (7-4 Top)/4-7 Thurs/11-10 Wed/11-9 Tues (Cash Top 5)/12-5 Mon (7-1 Top)/10-12 Sun/13-8 Sat (7-3 Top)/5-14 Fri/5-4 Thurs/13-8 Wed (Cash top 6 straight/12-10 Tues (Cash #1)/8-8 Mon (6-3 Top)/7-12 Sun (6-4 Top)/13-9 Sat (6-4 Top)/9-9 Fri (5-4 Top)/7-5 Thurs/14-6 Wed (9-2 TOP)/15-8 Sun (9-3 Top plays)/
452-387 YTD/ (244-175 Top plays)
*All plays are standard bets unless adorned with a star. Those adorned with a star are TOP Plays.*Top plays are listed in order of strength.
⭐️Phillies-115-W
⭐️Brewers-133
⭐️Boston-113-L
⭐️Orioles-1-110-L
⭐️Tigers-1-105-Push
⭐️Arizona-135
⭐️Royals+135
⭐️Angels-105
⭐️Guardians/Rangers Over 8-130
⭐️Oakland/Houston Over 8.5-115-W
Cubs+0.5-125 (F5/First 5 innings + RL)-W
Guardians+105
Padres-1-145
Gigantes+1.5-105
Cincy/Arizona Over 8-130
Phillies/Mutts Over 7.5-104-W
Marlin/Tigers Over 8-115-W
Rocks/Padres Over 7.5-130
NBA=2-2 Sun/2-3 Sat/1-4 Fri (1-1 Top)/1-2 Thurs/1-1 Wed/3-1 Tues (2-0 Top)/2-2mon (2-0 Top)/2-0 Sun/1-1 Sat(Cash #1 top)/3-0 Fri/3-1 Thurs/2-2 Wed/1-4 Tues/3-3 Mon (Cash #1)/5-3 Sun (4-1 Top)/5-2 Sat (3-0 Top)/4-2 Fri/5-0 Thurs/2-3 Wed/2-4 Tues/3-5 Mon/2-4 Sun/3-3 Sat (Cash top 2)/6-3 Wed/10-5 Tues (4-2 Top)/7-7 Sun (Cash top 2)/5-2 Sat (3-0 Top)/7-2 Mon (5-0 Top)/7-4 Sun (Cash 3/4 Top))/6-3 Sun (Cash 2 top)/6-5 Sat (Cash 3/4 Top)/7-3 Tues (Cash 3/4 Top)/9-4 Wed (Cash 3/4 Top)/7-3 Thurs (Cash 3/4 top)/10-2 Wed/6-2 Mon/7-1 mon/5-2 Wed (Cash 2/3 top plays)/4-1 Mon (cash 3/4 top plays)/787-700 YTD
⭐️Mavericks ML-115
⭐️Celtics-4-120 (First Half)-W
Celtics-8-114-L
ThundeMavs Over 213-118
NHL=0-2-1 Sun/1-2 Sat/2-1 Fri/1-2 Thurs (Cash #1)/2-1 Wed/1-2 Tues/0-1 Mon/2-1 Sun/1-0 Sat/0-3 Fri/0-1 Thurs/2-1 Wed/2-4 Tues/2-1 Mon/4-2 Sun (2-1 Top)/1-4 Sat (Cash #1)/3-3 Fri (2-1 Top)/4-1 Sun (Cash top 2)/3-0 Sat/4-3 Thurs/5-1 Sun/4-2 Friday (2-1 Top)/6-1 Fri/6-3 Thurs (3-1 Top)/4-2 Wed (2/3 Top)/5-3 Tues (Cash #1)/6-0 SUN/8-4 Sat/2-0 Fri/5-1 Sun (Cash 2/2 Top)/7-4 Sat (Cash 3 Top)/7-4 Thurs (Cash 3/4 Top plays)/4-1 Wed (3-0 Top)/6-3 Tues (Cash top 2 plays)/7-2 Sat/4-0 Fri/7-5 Sat/4-2 Friday/6-0 Sun/6-5 Sat/3-1 Fri/3-1 Wed/4-2 Tues/2-1 Sun/11-0 Sat/663-635 YTD
⭐️Colorado-134
⭐️Hurricanes/Rags Over 5.5-102-L
New York Rags-106-L
Dallas/Colorado Over 6-135
My picks/analysis/answering questions is and will remain free- but if you’ve been crushing the books with me, would you consider a tip for my time and effort? (and keep wife off back ha!)
As always Tips are NEVER expected but GREATLY appreciated to the newborn diaper fund/medical bills for wife.
Venmo=@ECU03 (LAST 4 DIGITS IF IT ASKS=5029)
PayPal=@superbae
Cashapp=$Alew1980

The Collect
O God, the King of glory, you have exalted your only Son Jesus Christ with great triumph to your kingdom in heaven: Do not leave us comfortless, but send us your Holy Spirit to strengthen us, and exalt us to that place where our Savior Christ has gone before; who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, in glory everlasting. Amen.
Readings:
Psalm 97; 99; 100 Reading I Samuel 16:1–13a
Gospel: Matthew 8:18–27
18 Now when Jesus saw great multitudes about him, he gave commandment to depart unto the other side.
19 And a certain scribe came, and said unto him, Master, I will follow thee whithersoever thou goest
20 And Jesus saith unto him,The foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests; but the Son of man hath not where to lay his head
21 And another of his disciples said unto him, Lord, suffer me first to go and bury my father.
22 But Jesus said unto him,Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead.
23 And when he was entered into a ship, his disciples followed him.
24 And, behold, there arose a great tempest in the sea, insomuch that the ship was covered with the waves: but he was asleep.
25 And his disciples came to him, and awoke him, saying, Lord, save us: we perish.
26 And he saith unto them,Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith?Then he arose, and rebuked the winds and the sea; and there was a great calm.
27 But the men marvelled, saying, What manner of man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey him!
Commentary:
Our study for today encompasses a collection of seemingly unrelated passages, but when viewed as a whole we find a great lesson in the cost of discipleship; not only for those who made up the first century church but for us today as well.
Although the verses recommended for this day begin with verse 18, by looking back at the rest of the chapter we find information which establishes the scene and gives us context for our understanding. Rather than to take a single verse at its face value, we must always look at the preceding verses as well as those that follow so as to thoroughly understand.
Assuming Matthews recollections of the events of chapter 8 are reflective of works of Christ that hapopened on the same day—and not events from throughout his ministry and lumped together here as Matthew wrote this Gospel years after the fact—we could conclude that our Lord had a busy day.
The chapter begins as Jesus is coming down off of the mountain where he preached the Sermon on the Mount, a great multitude of people following his every step, and a leper comes to worship him, he heals the man and tells him, “See thou tell no man; but go thy way, shew thyself to the priest, and offer the gift that Moses commanded, for a testimony unto them.” Then after entering Capernium a Roman Centurion comes to him asking Jesus to heal his servant. Impressed by the faith of a man who was not a Jew, but a Roman Gentile, Jesus healed the man’s slave by the authority of his word without even going to the slave’s bedside.
Matthew tells us that Jesus continued to heal many that day, beginning with Peter’s mother-in-law, then many others who were sick or possess by demons.
Our Lord had no qualms about healing the sick, but throughout the Gospels we can detect a note of concern on his part in that many were coming to him, apparently for the sole purpose of the healing of physical ailments, and not for the healing of spiritual illness. We find in more than one place, Jesus making the decision to cross over the Sea of Galilee, presumably so that he could teach away from the crowds that seemed to only want physical cures.
“Now when Jesus saw great multitudes about him, he gave commandment to depart unto the other side. And a certain scribe came, and said unto him, Master, I will follow thee whithersoever thou goest And Jesus saith unto him,The foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests; but the Son of man hath not where to lay his head” (vs. 18-20)
In a time when most were illiterate and few could even write, Scribes held an important position. Scribes had knowledge of the law and could draft legal documents (contracts for marriage, divorce, loans, inheritance, mortgages, the sale of land, and the like). Every village had at least one scribe, and we can surmise that scribes enjoyed a certain degree of wealth due to the need of their services.
Jesus lived a very simple life, traveling about teaching the people of his plan for salvation, a life that was not glamorous and one without financial compensation. Jesus didn’t tell the man “No, you can’t follow Me.” But He told him the truth, without painting a glamorized version of what it was like to follow Him. This is the opposite of techniques used by many evangelists today, but Jesus wanted the man to know what it would really be like.
“And another of his disciples said unto him, Lord, suffer me first to go and bury my father. But Jesus said unto him,Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead.” (vs. 21-22)
“Actually, this man did not ask for permission to dig a grave for his deceased father. He wanted to remain in his father’s house and care for him until the father died. This was obviously an indefinite period, which could drag on and on. This man was another of His disciples; yet he did not follow Jesus as he should have, nor as the 12 disciples did. This shows us that the term disciples has a somewhat broad meaning in the Gospel of Matthew, and must be understood in its context. The man wanted to follow Jesus, but not just yet. He knew it was good and that he should do it, but he felt there was a good reason why he could not do it now.” (Guzik)
“The excuse that this disciple made, to defer an immediate attendance on Christ (v. 21); "Lord, suffer me first to go and bury my father. Before I come to be a close and constant follower of thee, let me be allowed to perform this last office of respect to my father; and in the mean time, let it suffice to be a hearer of thee now and then, when I can spare time." His father (some think) was now sick, or dying, or dead; others think, he was only aged, and not likely in a course of nature, to continue long; and he desired leave to attend upon him in his sickness, at his death, and to his grave, and then he would be at Christ's service. This seemed a reasonable request, and yet it was not right. He had not the zeal he should have had for the work, and therefore pleaded this, because it seemed a plausible plea.” (Henry)
“And when he was entered into a ship, his disciples followed him. And, behold, there arose a great tempest in the sea, insomuch that the ship was covered with the waves: but he was asleep. And his disciples came to him, and awoke him, saying, Lord, save us: we perish. And he saith unto them,Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith? Then he arose, and rebuked the winds and the sea; and there was a great calm. But the men marvelled, saying, What manner of man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey him!” (vs. 23-27)
“He does not chide them for disturbing him with their prayers, but for disturbing themselves with their fears.” (Henry)
Here we have three great lessons in discipleship. The scribe would have been accustomed to receiving remuneration for his services, a disciple of Christ in those days as well as today must be prepared for hardship. Scribes such as this man enjoyed a certain degree of celebrity, an important man in the community who provided a service that was often needed. Disciples seldom gain celebrity, and the ones that do, frequently experience a downfall. Jesus said; “No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.” (Mt. 6:24) Jesus knew that this man would find it difficult to leave that which he was used to and to take up the cross and follow him.
The second lesson involves a disciple—a follower but not of the 12—who would have Jesus wait on him, until the man’s father had died and his affairs settled. Jesus knew his time on Earth was short, his appointment with destiny was just months away, but this man expected Jesus to wait for him.
We have to remember that at this point in his ministry, even the 12 seemed to think that when he established the Kingdom of God, they would enjoy high ranking positions in his administration. So many failed to realize that Jesus was speaking of a spiritual kingdom, a heavenly kingdom, and not a worldly political subdivision. Although Matthew does not make this point clear, we might surmise that this man wanted to be part of what he erroneously perceived to be a glorious worldly kingdom that rivaled that of King David’s era. Whatever the case may be in this man’s situation, when we consider the rebuke Jesus gave him “Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead.” We can learn of another great cost in discipleship, the need to serve Jesus versus the need to serve our own agenda.
Finally we come to the third lesson. “Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith?” We, as disciples of Christ, must always have faith, even in the face of danger.
Matthew Henry wrote: “His disciples followed him; the twelve kept close to him, when others staid behind upon the terra firma, where there was sure footing. Note, They, and they only, will be found the true disciples of Christ, that are willing to go to sea with him, to follow him into dangers and difficulties. Many would be content to go the land-way to heaven, that will rather stand still, or go back, than venture upon a dangerous sea; but those that would rest with Christ hereafter must follow him now wherever he leads them, into a ship or into a prison, as well as into a palace.”
Benediction
Almighty and most merciful God, grant that by the indwelling of your Holy Spirit we may be enlightened and strengthened for your service; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.
Thought for the Day:
The best thing to give to your enemy is forgiveness; to an opponent, tolerance; to a friend, your heart; to your child, a good example; to a father, deference; to your mother, conduct that will make her proud of you; to yourself, respect; to all others, charity.
Benjamin Franklin

I know they were considered sinful in the old law but in the new law are they still considered sinful

I’m really not sure how to begin writing this because I’ve never taken myself onto a forum to vent. But I don’t even know where else to express what has been happpening to me over the last few years. I’m relatively successful and young, I have legitimately dedicated my LIFE up until this point (from age 16 to 29) building my makeup business. I accomplished all my goals. But now I’m sitting here, as a high functioning depressed person and I can really feel the internal struggle I’m having. It’s like I don’t even know who I am anymore. I used to be so ambitious, full of life, go getter. Now, I feel like a burnt out version of myself that’s been chewed up and spit out. I went though Covid with my business and when we reopened I got to truly see how nasty the industry is, I’ve been treated terribly and have been through a lot of dramatic episodes that have broken me down from work. I really feel like the lowest version of myself. I’m super happy when I’m with friends and no one would even tell I’m depressed, but deep down I feel this horrible feeling that I’m just not happy. I don’t know what to do. I also have obsessive thoughts about new ventures, such as moving. I’ve moved probably 7 times in the last 2 years. The thought of moving homes just makes me feel like a fresh start is near. And I get depressed when I realize I can’t do it (my partner has had enough of me saying we’re moving). I don’t want to see or talk to anyone tbh. I haven’t left the house for work in a while, I work from home and I have such low energy. I obsessed about how to make more money, I have no hobbies. I don’t know how to turn my brain off. It’s making me miserable, it’s a roller coaster ride I am on. Help. :(

The Collect
O God, the King of glory, you have exalted your only Son Jesus Christ with great triumph to your kingdom in heaven: Do not leave us comfortless, but send us your Holy Spirit to strengthen us, and exalt us to that place where our Savior Christ has gone before; who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, in glory everlasting. Amen.
Readings:
Psalm 97; 99; 100 Reading I Samuel 16:1–13a
Gospel: Matthew 8:18–27
18 Now when Jesus saw great multitudes about him, he gave commandment to depart unto the other side.
19 And a certain scribe came, and said unto him, Master, I will follow thee whithersoever thou goest
20 And Jesus saith unto him,The foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests; but the Son of man hath not where to lay his head
21 And another of his disciples said unto him, Lord, suffer me first to go and bury my father.
22 But Jesus said unto him,Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead.
23 And when he was entered into a ship, his disciples followed him.
24 And, behold, there arose a great tempest in the sea, insomuch that the ship was covered with the waves: but he was asleep.
25 And his disciples came to him, and awoke him, saying, Lord, save us: we perish.
26 And he saith unto them,Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith?Then he arose, and rebuked the winds and the sea; and there was a great calm.
27 But the men marvelled, saying, What manner of man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey him!
Commentary:
Our study for today encompasses a collection of seemingly unrelated passages, but when viewed as a whole we find a great lesson in the cost of discipleship; not only for those who made up the first century church but for us today as well.
Although the verses recommended for this day begin with verse 18, by looking back at the rest of the chapter we find information which establishes the scene and gives us context for our understanding. Rather than to take a single verse at its face value, we must always look at the preceding verses as well as those that follow so as to thoroughly understand.
Assuming Matthews recollections of the events of chapter 8 are reflective of works of Christ that hapopened on the same day—and not events from throughout his ministry and lumped together here as Matthew wrote this Gospel years after the fact—we could conclude that our Lord had a busy day.
The chapter begins as Jesus is coming down off of the mountain where he preached the Sermon on the Mount, a great multitude of people following his every step, and a leper comes to worship him, he heals the man and tells him, “See thou tell no man; but go thy way, shew thyself to the priest, and offer the gift that Moses commanded, for a testimony unto them.” Then after entering Capernium a Roman Centurion comes to him asking Jesus to heal his servant. Impressed by the faith of a man who was not a Jew, but a Roman Gentile, Jesus healed the man’s slave by the authority of his word without even going to the slave’s bedside.
Matthew tells us that Jesus continued to heal many that day, beginning with Peter’s mother-in-law, then many others who were sick or possess by demons.
Our Lord had no qualms about healing the sick, but throughout the Gospels we can detect a note of concern on his part in that many were coming to him, apparently for the sole purpose of the healing of physical ailments, and not for the healing of spiritual illness. We find in more than one place, Jesus making the decision to cross over the Sea of Galilee, presumably so that he could teach away from the crowds that seemed to only want physical cures.
“Now when Jesus saw great multitudes about him, he gave commandment to depart unto the other side. And a certain scribe came, and said unto him, Master, I will follow thee whithersoever thou goest And Jesus saith unto him,The foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests; but the Son of man hath not where to lay his head” (vs. 18-20)
In a time when most were illiterate and few could even write, Scribes held an important position. Scribes had knowledge of the law and could draft legal documents (contracts for marriage, divorce, loans, inheritance, mortgages, the sale of land, and the like). Every village had at least one scribe, and we can surmise that scribes enjoyed a certain degree of wealth due to the need of their services.
Jesus lived a very simple life, traveling about teaching the people of his plan for salvation, a life that was not glamorous and one without financial compensation. Jesus didn’t tell the man “No, you can’t follow Me.” But He told him the truth, without painting a glamorized version of what it was like to follow Him. This is the opposite of techniques used by many evangelists today, but Jesus wanted the man to know what it would really be like.
“And another of his disciples said unto him, Lord, suffer me first to go and bury my father. But Jesus said unto him,Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead.” (vs. 21-22)
“Actually, this man did not ask for permission to dig a grave for his deceased father. He wanted to remain in his father’s house and care for him until the father died. This was obviously an indefinite period, which could drag on and on. This man was another of His disciples; yet he did not follow Jesus as he should have, nor as the 12 disciples did. This shows us that the term disciples has a somewhat broad meaning in the Gospel of Matthew, and must be understood in its context. The man wanted to follow Jesus, but not just yet. He knew it was good and that he should do it, but he felt there was a good reason why he could not do it now.” (Guzik)
“The excuse that this disciple made, to defer an immediate attendance on Christ (v. 21); "Lord, suffer me first to go and bury my father. Before I come to be a close and constant follower of thee, let me be allowed to perform this last office of respect to my father; and in the mean time, let it suffice to be a hearer of thee now and then, when I can spare time." His father (some think) was now sick, or dying, or dead; others think, he was only aged, and not likely in a course of nature, to continue long; and he desired leave to attend upon him in his sickness, at his death, and to his grave, and then he would be at Christ's service. This seemed a reasonable request, and yet it was not right. He had not the zeal he should have had for the work, and therefore pleaded this, because it seemed a plausible plea.” (Henry)
“And when he was entered into a ship, his disciples followed him. And, behold, there arose a great tempest in the sea, insomuch that the ship was covered with the waves: but he was asleep. And his disciples came to him, and awoke him, saying, Lord, save us: we perish. And he saith unto them,Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith? Then he arose, and rebuked the winds and the sea; and there was a great calm. But the men marvelled, saying, What manner of man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey him!” (vs. 23-27)
“He does not chide them for disturbing him with their prayers, but for disturbing themselves with their fears.” (Henry)
Here we have three great lessons in discipleship. The scribe would have been accustomed to receiving remuneration for his services, a disciple of Christ in those days as well as today must be prepared for hardship. Scribes such as this man enjoyed a certain degree of celebrity, an important man in the community who provided a service that was often needed. Disciples seldom gain celebrity, and the ones that do, frequently experience a downfall. Jesus said; “No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.” (Mt. 6:24) Jesus knew that this man would find it difficult to leave that which he was used to and to take up the cross and follow him.
The second lesson involves a disciple—a follower but not of the 12—who would have Jesus wait on him, until the man’s father had died and his affairs settled. Jesus knew his time on Earth was short, his appointment with destiny was just months away, but this man expected Jesus to wait for him.
We have to remember that at this point in his ministry, even the 12 seemed to think that when he established the Kingdom of God, they would enjoy high ranking positions in his administration. So many failed to realize that Jesus was speaking of a spiritual kingdom, a heavenly kingdom, and not a worldly political subdivision. Although Matthew does not make this point clear, we might surmise that this man wanted to be part of what he erroneously perceived to be a glorious worldly kingdom that rivaled that of King David’s era. Whatever the case may be in this man’s situation, when we consider the rebuke Jesus gave him “Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead.” We can learn of another great cost in discipleship, the need to serve Jesus versus the need to serve our own agenda.
Finally we come to the third lesson. “Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith?” We, as disciples of Christ, must always have faith, even in the face of danger.
Matthew Henry wrote: “His disciples followed him; the twelve kept close to him, when others staid behind upon the terra firma, where there was sure footing. Note, They, and they only, will be found the true disciples of Christ, that are willing to go to sea with him, to follow him into dangers and difficulties. Many would be content to go the land-way to heaven, that will rather stand still, or go back, than venture upon a dangerous sea; but those that would rest with Christ hereafter must follow him now wherever he leads them, into a ship or into a prison, as well as into a palace.”
Benediction
Almighty and most merciful God, grant that by the indwelling of your Holy Spirit we may be enlightened and strengthened for your service; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.
Thought for the Day:
The best thing to give to your enemy is forgiveness; to an opponent, tolerance; to a friend, your heart; to your child, a good example; to a father, deference; to your mother, conduct that will make her proud of you; to yourself, respect; to all others, charity.
Benjamin Franklin

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