Me (18/M) and my father (60), don't have a good relationship because all he does seems very intolerable to me.
To start this off, he likes to lecture and tell people stuff to make himself better. You know how i know? Because he doesn't care wether or not when he's making a mistake and when someone lecture him back, he doesn't like it and continue doing it. Even when my mother told him not to do this or that, he still continued doing it. He even tried to be really rough with his arguing.
Next, he likes to mess with people's things or stuff. He has done this alot of time and it literally affects our family. Sometimes, he likes to give random things away to people he met and one time, he also sold my mother's old car without her permission. My mother even agreed to give him $640 to build a gate around our house, but he instead bought a fricking wood! And because of that, some of our dogs can get attacked by other dogs and get car accidents.
Third, he likes to take advantage of his OWN family. I still remembered the time probably around 3 years ago), he took my sister's (18/F) bank money by getting her fingerprints to the bank And of course, he treats us by giving us KFC. He also took mine which has about 1K about that time and he took it all. Also for a side note, we knew it because my mother who's hardworking, checked our bank account and she found nothing left.
Fourth, distancing behaviour. My father keeps himself busy but in reality it's not necessary at all. I knew him very well, and his obsession with buying lands and building a fish pond is just tiring. He does it for a very long time and in reality, i don't actually care much if he does it. But the thing that icks me is that he uses some of OUR money to buy it. Even my mother's.
Lastly, he likes to compare our lives with others. Everytime there's someone who succeeded, he always say that we should be like them or this or that. He just can't shut up about other's and always looked down at us!

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[REQ] (£160 ) - (#London, England, UK), (25/11/2021), (Bank TransfePaypal)

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Started a new job and got hit by emergency tax. I've got an urgent bill that I can't put off, but I'll repay promptly on the 25th of the month when I'm paid.

I am 34 year old male registered nurse living and working in the US. I came to the US to work as a nurse a few years ago. I was a nurse outside the US. My net worth is 790K and all but 1000 dollars is invested in ETFs that tracks nasdaq 100 and s&p 500 and Bitcoin. 85% of my NW is in stock market and the rest is in Bitcoin. Half of my NW is my contributions and the rest has resulted from investment gains. No inheritance.
I have been trying to earn as much as possible and save as aggresively as possible.
I always have picked up extra shifts and overtime whenever available. I have lived below my means for many years. I don't own a house and car. I rent a room, use public transportation and walk. I try not to eat out often. Even when I eat out, I try to spend less than 25$.
I have been trying to DCA stocks whenever I get paid for the last 5 years at least.
As soon as my pay comes into my bank account, I send it to my brokerage account and buy stocks. I prefer stocks and bitcoin over cash because they always appreciate long-term while cash loses its value over time. I recently switched 20% of my NW from stocks to Bitcoin.
My goal is to hit 2 million dollars by age 40 and go leanfire.
When I hit 2 million dollars, I will probably start working 24 hours per week and not try to save my salary because I know that my net worth will keep growing as long as I don't touch it.
I hope my post helps people interested in leanfire including some fellow nurses around the world.

I've bought several cars before but they were in low interest environments (pre-COVID) and one during COVID. I'm aware things have drastically changed today with a combination of auto manufacturers somewhat catching up to demand, [some] dealerships having vehicles on lot longer, and high interest car loans.
Two big questions I have:

• Are we now in an environment where new car APR from dealership beats outside financing? I come from an environment where I'm always told to do financing through my bank or CU
• Is there a technique/strategy/attitude change on car salesman? I'm use to going in preparing to haggle and play dealership games but I won't if we're in an environment where its not possible. For example during COVID and car shortage.

So it happened. 5 years I have been a Monzo customer with all of my finances going in and out of this account. Never had an issue. They even let me purchase my car of £21,000 via Bank Transfer without any questions.
Yesterday I sold our family car, it was only a small amount of £1,750. I tried to move the money and send it to my partner and boom, your account is under review. The support team keep repeating themselves and state "a specialist" will contact you.
Once the account is open I feel it's time to move.
Anyone else experienced a similar thing?

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[REQ] ($550) - (#Chicago, IL, USA), (11/19/2021), (Cashapp, Venmo, Paypal)

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Hi, long shot since this is my first time borrowing but I can pay back realistically by Tuesday or Wednesday at the earliest. I signed up for a yearly gym membership over the weekend and forgot I have a payment for $550 coming out on Monday which I can't cancel. I'll transfer money out of my savings account to cover it but I need to link my bank accounts and make a transfer which will take until Tuesday or Wednesday. I could pay back at the earliest Wednesday or Friday at the absolute latest.

I knew my husband was in recovery when I met him (which he so kindly threw in my face Wednesday night) and we’ve been through some rough times with his addiction during our 8 year relationship. This last year, however, has just taken the cake.
He hadn’t used drugs in several years but was still drinking. It escalated to a point last summer where he started hallucinating things, including thinking there were people in our house. He was convinced I was cheating on him, when all I was trying to do was make it to and from work every day without having a meltdown. He finally sobered up in January and was sober until the end of March.
We went on a trip for his birthday in April and he decided it was ok for him to drink. I knew it wasn’t, but that’s not my decision to make. At first it was “manageable” but I could quickly see the escalation even if he couldn’t.
It finally came to a head Wednesday evening when he drank so much that he jumped out of the car while I was driving us home from a concert. He then blamed me for abandoning him, and got violent when he got home which resulted in me calling the cops. He wouldn’t let me get any of my belongings or my car and so I left in a Uber with the clothes on my back. I went back the next day to try to get some things, only to discover that my car had been moved from the garage to the street and it looked like someone had taken a baseball bat to the entire drivers side. I can’t prove he did it but I know he did.
I have been staying at a safe space since Wednesday night and he’s continued to text me on and off since then, going back and forth between being sorry, being hateful, and being all woe is me. Based on his bank account activity, I suspect he’s not only drinking but also using drugs.
The thing that kills me is that he claims he knew I would never see him as enough for me, that I would always want more. The more I sit and reflect on the whole thing, I realize that nothing I did would ever be enough for him to stay sober. I know that’s not my job but it still really freaking hurts. I love that man so much but it will never be enough.
Sorry for the long post. I’ve been trying to be super logical about next steps and the emotions just all hit at once.

Married couple, mid 30's. I make ~150k self-employed income. My wife is currently full time stay at home with our kids. The better part of the past 5 years our savings/investments have gone towards buying and renovating our current home. We're pretty settled in and my business has been improving so I really want to focus on getting back into investing and building our portfolio.
I haven't done any sort of self employed ira/401's etc. I have a sep ira from a old job but havnt touched it. Between saving for a home and being at a low tax bracket, anything we saved was just put into a post tax brokerage account.
Current financials:
Cash / Checking: $45,000 My Brokerage: $25,000 (vtsax) Sep IRA: $10,000 (vtsax) Wife Brokerage: $50,000 (ekbax - high fees but mostly all profit so we've been avoiding a taxable event)
Home Equity: ~$325k
Debt: Mortgage: $400k @ 3.25% Car Loan: $4800 @ 2.95%
Monthly Net after all personal & business expenses paid: ~$3750
I guess my main two questions would be:

1. Where should I be putting $X/mo? Split between brokerage and self-employeed accounts? Or primarily all self-employeed pre-tax accounts? We may consider investing in additional real estate in the future so I'm not sure if I want everything tied up in retirement accounts. For the time being my accountant says the tax savings are minimial so it really comes down to wether or not we plan on accessing the money in the near future.
2. Do we sell my wifes brokerage account and combine all of the funds in vanguard. Her current fund has a 1.1% expense ratio and we dont contribute anything towards it. It will have roughly $35k in capital gains when we sell tho. How will that effect our overall tax bracket for that year?

So this is an insane story that I've put a post on LegalAdviceUK to try get some advice from the legal eagles but that didn't really cover the full story. But having an informal chat in a comments section of this page about it and posting the legal ins and outs yesterday has given me some strength. And if I need to I will have the tub of cookie dough ice cream to comfort my big fat butt. So here we go a story which I've been trying to do for months without feeling nothing but shame and humiliation for allowing this parasite into my life enough to impact it like this.
So some backstory on my life in January 2023 I was working for Uber Eats as a delivery driver and had a Motorcycle accident. As a result I broke my foot, lost my insurance as Uber did everything they could to make sure it was invalidated to avoid responsibility for me. As a result I became jobless and homeless within a matter of days as I was already behind due to high insurance costs and low pay. I spent the next 9 months couch surfing and jumping from job to job until I finally settled working for a convenience store chain and leaving the city of Portsmouth for the town of Gosport across the way. I was settled with a roommate in October and I was doing well again.
During this I'd won a seat for myself into a semi major Poker tournament that I cashed in during August. I made £1300 for a weekend. In enters Mr S the person who will be the focus of this piece. He needed me to help him out with opening up some betting accounts for some online sports betting. He sweetened the deal by saying that he would invest in me to make my dream company come true, making a film business. He would invest £5000 into me to get me started which is all I needed because my plan was to work from home and get film clients and work up to an office. I too would invest £5000 over time. You see Mr S was a successful businessman in the community, a former sports personality and everyone loves this guy. Couldn't find someone to curse his name in a thousand miles I'm pretty sure. I had known him through my times as a poker player for nearly 12 years myself and I couldn't say I knew a bad thing about him. So I opened the accounts thinking nothing of it, then he asked to borrow money off me which I thought nothing of at the time as he said that he had it in cash and could pay me back in the morning as it was in cash not the bank apparently. He regularly did have this issue apparently because he worked in a cash heavy business (buying precious metals) and he was a regular at casinos. So I gave him the money. He paid me back some of it then made me wait another week to get the rest after I was calling him regularly to make him respond. This would be a recurring theme throughout the story.
After this issue was resolved I made a thought to push for the money to secure the investment. Mr S got the call and stated that we needed a business meeting in his office. So I asked to set up the business meeting which he regularly called to reschedule. After two months of this I got fed up of him brushing me off whilst he's borrowing my entire salary to gamble on and off when he ran out of his own money. So I changed the passwords on all the gambling sites to force him to take a meeting and pay me back the most recent amount he borrowed. I was naturally pissed off that this multi-millionaire was so reckless with his money that he was borrowing off of me and was constantly late paying me back. He paid me back and set up a meeting. He didn't make the meeting but assured me he was going to transfer me £3000 without one. He did not claiming his accounts were frozen by the government (I know I should have ran like a Gazelle from a Hyena at this point). Well I excused this behaviour because he reassured me everything would get sorted. This accounts frozen issue also became a recurring theme throughout the story too.
For a while Mr S didn't borrow any money off of me, he just used his own money (or some other poor sods), I kept asking him to invest into the business as I had opened a business account and I was investing my own money and borrowing money via a credit card. In total I put in £5000 whilst working a minimum wage job and using small amounts I'd earned through a bit of penny stock trading and poker, trying to get the money together. I worked 50-60 hours a week to pay for Christmas and invest in the business because of the fact that I didn't want to waste time. I set up business meetings, got business cards, bought equipment and got my friend who I will simply call Angel to work with me to put together a team. My friend Alf and a guy we found on LinkedIn I'll simply call J became our first team. We also found a lovely Graphics Artists online who I'll call Ally. Everyone was on freelance for now as we needed to get clients but we assembled the team. Mr S kept missing business meetings with clients that I set up for him to secure including three major ones that might have cost me a potential 6 figure contract that I spent two months setting up. Making County Football (Soccer for you Yanks) games on a Patreon page and YouTube for live streams. This mega pissed me off and Mr S reassured me he would get the contract back or getting a bigger one. I entrusted him with this task but as far as I can tell he never did anything for it.
On the night of his youngest child being born, whilst his wife was giving birth he spent his time playing online poker or sports betting, I know this because I had the transaction record and he even borrowed money off of me. He took a week to pay me £500 and I almost lost my brand new housing because of this. Thank goodness for my new friend and housemate being understanding of the situation and after this I put my foot down and said no more borrowing from me and if he asked again I would cut him off. I also insisted again that he should invest into the business. He made his excuses of the bank being frozen again and I told him to get his shit sorted out and invest because I'm getting annoyed waiting on him. I wanted to make an advert and without his money I couldn't do this.
So it comes January 2024 I lost my job with the convenience store after I stopped a shoplifter who'd assaulted me when I turned a corner. And by stop I mean used my big boy voice and scared the crap out of them. Don't know why they fired me for that but what do I care it freed me up and paid me £2000 to go away. I got a new job whilst also securing my first client. The client paid the first half of the money which they owed for the filming to be done and Mr S knowing this asked me to lend it to him for the purpose of gambling which I flatly shut down because it was staff wages for the project. When I told him this he said "I'm sure I'll have it back in time and if not they won't mind because they'll get experience." Yep you read that right he was willing to let the staff work for free so he could bet on horses. I told him that I would never put myself or him above my team when it comes to pay because we have no right to ask anyone to work for nothing when they are all multi talented individuals.
Angel was a video editor, animator, photographer, camera operator and lighting expert. She holds a Masters degree in film technology.
J was a camera operator who had worked on major TV documentary sets and was already taking a pay cut to work on this as an investment in the companies future. He held a BA degree.
Alf is a sound operator and musician with a masters degree in music.
Yep this guy wanted to not pay these guys so he could gamble recklessly. I semi caved though by giving him my personal money because he would repeatedly call me three times an hour over this. This was his tactic, begging and harassing me so he can get the money and then when I want the money back ignore and excuse the debt for a week. He regularly said he'd have it back in a day and it would take a week. He gave me £200 extra on top of this debt and said to put it into the business account to help pay for an advert. I did it and yeah that apparently was all I was going to need to make and distribute an advert in his mind. In reality it would barely cover the graphics and music for the advert.
Finally my old debts were catching up with me in March 2024 and I got myself an IVA (Individual Voluntary Arrangement) to protect myself and the company as a debt management option. This is because of the fact that old bills, credit cards and loans that I'd taken out were catching up with me that I expected to pay off by now. Which I might have done, had Mr S not been screwing around with the investment. In this process I had to shut down all the gambling sites to comply with the IVA. I called Mr S and informed him to which he promptly told me he was no longer going to invest in my business if I won't let him gamble and risk my IVA. According to him he was going to invest when he won £10000 and was going to give me half of the money as his investment forgetting he'd already won that and then some 2 weeks prior and I knew it. I called him out on this fact and told him to pony up or bugger off because he'd wasted 8 months of mine and my teams lives promising his investment and failing on every level. He exploded on me telling me no one talks to him like this, how dare I describe him as a con artist and a fraud. He demanded his £200 back which I flat out refused as I didn't have it. I spent it paying the Angel the money I owed her because she did extra work on the editing that I failed to secure the money for from either Mr S or the Client. She offered to work for less but I flat out refused that offer because it was my mistake and my problem to deal with.
Over the next 6 weeks now I've been harassed every few days over £200 to be paid back which I'm now refusing to pay because screw him. He lied to me for 8 months and as far as I'm concerned he stole money out of the company and then wants me to pay him more money to buy him out and disregard the team members so he can get his money when he's a multimillionaire and the team are like me on minimum wage and freelancing. So AITA for calling him a thief and con artist whilst refusing to pay him a penny so I can prioritise fixing the damage he had caused? If he'd had invested in the business the way he said he would and it was a normal falling out I probably would pay him out as the business would have been more likely on solid ground with an advert made and a chance for the business to thrive. But this was my lot. I've since been told I'm a worthless person because I won't pay him back and take his calls. I'm a terrible friend for letting such a small issue like me trying to sort out my life at the expense of Mr S's gambling life.
As it stands I haven't paid Mr S back, I still owe a small amount to Angel but am paying her back and I've taken a new job at my local Maccies to insure I do. I'm still looking for more clients to do film work with to get my team into the swing of it. Hopefully we do get more work as I have a wonderful team and I want them to get work with me and make a very successful future for us all. I'm looking into getting a start up business grant from the UK government as well so we can go forward properly as well.
So AITA for cutting Mr S out of the business, trusting him at all and risking so much on his word or for not paying him back the £200?
Click here if you are interested in seeing our first clients advert. I apologise to the great Lady Charlotte Dobre for plugging my work on her channel but I would love to have people view my teams wonderful work and hopefully get more work for the future here in Hampshire UK. Please DM me for details to hire us too we intend to make music videos, business adverts and commissioned films.
For all you reading/listening this short novel I thank you and I wish you well. I hope I get more business soon and I want everyone to know that we will be posting up Patreon work soon covering Entitled People and Neckbeard Stories from Reddit along with Documentaries that we might be making with Sky TV, English Heritage and also a planned comedy show in the style of a budget John Oliver Last Week Tonight. Again sorry for plugging myself Lady Charlotte Dobre and I send you love and respect because your videos make my days feel better when depression is biting my ass.
PS - That Ice Cream Tub didn't survive.

Hey y'all. I'm trying to help my partner get her bills in order. She has 3 open accounts. 2 credit cards and 1 loan for a washing machine from Conn's.
She did get these cards while she had a much better job paying twice as much as her current job, but now she's barely making bills and we still have to get this shit taken care of.
The cards are capital one (she banks with them) with a balance of 1700 (maxed) she misses payment or is late and it bumps her back up to the max amount even after she's paid them a few times on time.
The other card is Kohl's. It had a 300 limit which she maxed immediately and never made a payment (I just found this out).
Conns wants 1500 to pay off the washer and I think she's paying them 108 a month.
I don't know what other information y'all need but I definitely want to help her get in front of the debt to pay it off. She's been making late payments on most of them , and definitely the minimum.
We need to get them paid off so that she gets her credit score going back up (or at least stop going down) and do better the next time around.
What steps should we take first?

For context, I broke my arm badly and ended up needing surgery to repair both my humerus and my radial nerve. I lost complete use of my right hand and wrist right after my boyfriend and I used our savings to move into our new home.
My father is quite literally rich. He owns a business and makes VERY good money. He’s bought cars for his girlfriends.. his daughter in laws.. he even helps out with my brother’s BM’s rent. The hospital wanted $1500 down before I could have my surgery and I was struggling to get the money together. I could’ve taken out a loan, but my credit had actually been ruined by my dad. When he got out of jail years ago he opened tons of credit cards under my name and subsequently never paid them off.
When I asked him he kept putting it off. I begged him to call me for about a week, never did. He couldn’t talk to me when I needed it most but he was actively posting pictures of his new corvette on FB. After this I kinda just snapped, told him to eat shit. Asked why he could buy his girlfriends fancy cars but couldn’t shell out a grand to pay for a surgery that I genuinely needed and then I blocked him. He then FINALLY decided to reply by sending me a long, nasty messages via Facebook. He bad mouthed both me, my mother, and my half sisters mother. I told him he had no place to be talking bad about anyone, especially my mother, as he has walked out on every kid he’s ever had.
My mother ended up paying for my surgery, I paid her back shortly after as this all happened right before tax season started. I just pretty much gave her my tax return. I was hesitant to ask her to begin with because I always feel bad for asking her for stuff when she struggled so much as a single mother. She has a good amount of money now but I never really ask her for anything. She was actually the one who insisted I message my dad since he's always saying that he'd help if anything major were to happen.
My father has since tried to reach out, he’s apologized through alt Facebook accounts but I really want nothing to do with him. His girlfriend has even reached out pretty much shaming me calling me an asshole for ignoring him because apparently he really is genuinely upset about the whole thing. He’s had a lot of kids, I know I have brothers and sisters I’m probably never going to meet. Yet I still tried to see the best in him, I let him vent to me when he lost his dad, when he felt lonely saying that all of his kids hate him (rightfully so) and I’m the only one of his kids who would actually visit him just to visit him. I never asked for much from him growing up and the one time I genuinely needed help he flaked out. I dunno, guess I just needed to vent. I feel like I’m the asshole for asking him to help out to begin with.

Hi, my car loan has my moms address (only because i had a phone bill and bank statement go to that address) and in pretty sure that will be the registration address. Is there anyway to change that on the registration only? License and insurance will be my address.

I (23M) decided to take a bank loan to buy a car. It was a big step for me, and I was both nervous and excited about the decision. I asked my mom for help because she's more knowledgeable about these matters. However, she's quite particular—if she's not reminded to do something, she won't do it, and if you remind her too often, she feels pressured.
She advised me not to buy the first car I saw or to make a purchase out of desperation. She also warned against buying a car that was just 'okay.' I was adamant about using only my money because I wanted the car to be solely mine and to avoid any potential arguments with her over financial contributions.
Despite this, my mom took out a loan to help me get a 'nicer' car, even though I had used part of my loan for other expenses. I reluctantly agreed to her help under the condition that it wouldn't lead to any arguments. Unfortunately, that's exactly what happened after we got the car.
She also insisted on looking for trucks, claiming I would look 'dumb' getting out of a small car due to my height—I'm 6 feet tall. I didn't agree with her reasoning and continued to send her recommendations for small cars.
To my surprise, she bought a car without my input—the only one she had contacted—and based on her friend's opinion that 'the motor looked nice.' This broke both rules she had set. When she picked me up from work with the car, I immediately noticed several issues: a cracked front window, only two functioning windows, a missing door handle, weak lights, and faulty wipers. Later, we discovered the car leaked and had overheating problems.
The repairs were costly, and my mom had to take out a second loan. This led to a fight because it was the exact situation I wanted to avoid. The car has continued to deteriorate and become more expensive to maintain. Now, my mom complains about the car's condition and claims it's practically hers because she's investing in the repairs, even though the car is registered in my name.
Everytime my mom mentions any issues with the car i tell her to please cut it short bc i'm not comfortable with hesring anything else the car needs to get fixed (the fact i'm going through a heavy depressive episode is not helping either), but i feel one day if she keeps up with this i'll blow up and tell her that is all her fault and that she cost me a nice car i could take care of myself, and that it seems like all she did was scam me out of my money, convince me to take a loan, all for her to mess up big time for something is now not even mine bc all she'll do is gaslight me into just surrendering the car to her.
I understand she's the one that at the end have been investing the most into the car so she'd be right to say that, but i'm not kidding... I feel scammed out of it and i'm tired to not even feel ownership of something i so desperately wanted.
WIBTA? i just need some feedback bc this has been bugging me for a while now

Four years ago, Reddit helped me make one of the best financial decisions I'll ever make. Well, we're coming up on another one, and I would love some feedback/advice.
Back then, y'all encouraged my 23-year-old self to buy my first home. We ended up paying ~$210k for a terrific home that's now valued at ~$360k+ and an interest rate of 2.875%. I still work at the company, and several years later, my wife and I are doing really well.
3 days ago, we found a home in Zillow that's gorgeous and in a terrific neighborhood near downtown in our up-and-coming city (we're currently about 20 minutes out). It checks nearly all the boxes, and it's listed at $649,000.
It's the kind of home I never thought I'd be able to afford - and I'm still not 100% sure if we can. But I think so?
Quick stats Ages: We just turned 28/29 Combined Salary: ~$180k-190k (depending on bonuses and inconsistent freelance work). Savings: $101,000 in cash. ~$12k in a brokerage account. ~$191,000 in retirement accounts. 2 cars - paid off. Mine should be good for 8+ years. My wife will likely need to replace hers in a couple years. Kids aren't in the cards for us, so thankfully that's not a concern.
Current home - mortgage payment is $1,200 monthly. Rental calculators online say that we should expect to get $1,600-$2,000 from it. Would likely go through a property management company. It's 4 years old and in solid shape.
Avg. Monthly spending: $6,700-$7,000, including existing mortgage. We've been a little sloppy here, and could probably cut this down a bit.
Monthly takehome - combined, I have us at around $12,125 monthly. If we adjust retirement contributions down to 15% each, then that jumps to $13k.
Because we want to maintain an emergency fund, we only want to put around 10% down on the home.
If you've read this far, I genuinely appreciate it.
Specific questions: 1. Are we about to be house poor? By my numbers, I'm thinking we should still be saving around $1,500 a month with the new plan, but that is tighter than we've been.

1. Is it more efficient to use a 401k loan (or a HELOC on our existing home) for the other 10% of the downpayment? PMI (est. at $300/monthly) feels like throwing money away. Would also appreciate any other ideas here.
   
2. Lower interest rate aside, are we likely to save more in interest from selling our current home and applying the equity toward the new one? Or would it be better to rent it out, try to cut even on the mortgage, and maintain the equity/rate there?
   
3. I recognize that we've been privileged/blessed to be in a really good situation over the past few years. Any additional advice/concerns about the above? Anything I'm not considering? Thanks!
   

Four years ago, Reddit helped me make one of the best financial decisions I'll ever make. Well, we're coming up on another one, and I would love some feedback/advice.
Back then, y'all encouraged my 23-year-old self to buy my first home. We ended up paying ~$210k for a terrific home that's now valued at ~$360k+ and an interest rate of 2.875%. I still work at the company, and several years later, my wife and I are doing really well.
3 days ago, we found a home in Zillow that's gorgeous and in a terrific neighborhood near downtown in our up-and-coming city (we're currently about 20 minutes out). It checks nearly all the boxes, and it's listed at $649,000.
It's the kind of home I never thought I'd be able to afford - and I'm still not 100% sure if we can. But I think so?
Quick stats Ages: We just turned 28/29 Combined Salary: ~$180k-190k (depending on bonuses and inconsistent freelance work). Savings: $101,000 in cash. ~$12k in a brokerage account. ~$191,000 in retirement accounts. 2 cars - paid off. Mine should be good for 8+ years. My wife will likely need to replace hers in a couple years. Kids aren't in the cards for us, so thankfully that's not a concern.
Current home - mortgage payment is $1,200 monthly. Rental calculators online say that we should expect to get $1,600-$2,000 from it. Would likely go through a property management company. It's 4 years old and in solid shape.
Avg. Monthly spending: $6,700-$7,000, including existing mortgage. We've been a little sloppy here, and could probably cut this down a bit.
Monthly takehome - combined, I have us at around $12,125 monthly. If we adjust retirement contributions down to 15% each, then that jumps to $13k.
Because we want to maintain an emergency fund, we only want to put around 10% down on the home.
If you've read this far, I genuinely appreciate it.
Specific questions: 1. Are we about to be house poor? By my numbers, I'm thinking we should still be saving around $1,500 a month with the new plan, but that is tighter than we've been.

1. Is it more efficient to use a 401k loan (or a HELOC on our existing home) for the other 10% of the downpayment? PMI (est. at $300/monthly) feels like throwing money away. Would also appreciate any other ideas here.
   
2. Lower interest rate aside, are we likely to save more in interest from selling our current home and applying the equity toward the new one? Or would it be better to rent it out, try to cut even on the mortgage, and maintain the equity/rate there?
   
3. I recognize that we've been privileged/blessed to be in a really good situation over the past few years. Any additional advice/concerns about the above? Anything I'm not considering? Thanks!
   

Four years ago, Reddit helped me make one of the best financial decisions I'll ever make. Well, we're coming up on another one, and I would love some feedback/advice.
Back then, y'all encouraged my 23-year-old self to buy my first home. We ended up paying ~$210k for a terrific home that's now valued at ~$360k+ and an interest rate of 2.875%. I still work at the company, and several years later, my wife and I are doing really well.
3 days ago, we found a home in Zillow that's gorgeous and in a terrific neighborhood near downtown in our up-and-coming city (we're currently about 20 minutes out). It checks nearly all the boxes, and it's listed at $649,000.
It's the kind of home I never thought I'd be able to afford - and I'm still not 100% sure if we can. But I think so?
Quick stats Ages: We just turned 28/29 Combined Salary: ~$180k-190k (depending on bonuses and inconsistent freelance work). Savings: $101,000 in cash. ~$12k in a brokerage account. ~$191,000 in retirement accounts. 2 cars - paid off. Mine should be good for 8+ years. My wife will likely need to replace hers in a couple years. Kids aren't in the cards for us, so thankfully that's not a concern.
Current home - mortgage payment is $1,200 monthly. Rental calculators online say that we should expect to get $1,600-$2,000 from it. Would likely go through a property management company. It's 4 years old and in solid shape.
Avg. Monthly spending: $6,700-$7,000, including existing mortgage. We've been a little sloppy here, and could probably cut this down a bit.
Monthly takehome - combined, I have us at around $12,125 monthly. If we adjust retirement contributions down to 15% each, then that jumps to $13k.
Because we want to maintain an emergency fund, we only want to put around 10% down on the home.
If you've read this far, I genuinely appreciate it.
Specific questions: 1. Are we about to be house poor? By my numbers, I'm thinking we should still be saving around $1,500 a month with the new plan, but that is tighter than we've been.

1. Is it more efficient to use a 401k loan (or a HELOC on our existing home) for the other 10% of the downpayment? PMI (est. at $300/monthly) feels like throwing money away. Would also appreciate any other ideas here.
   
2. Lower interest rate aside, are we likely to save more in interest from selling our current home and applying the equity toward the new one? Or would it be better to rent it out, try to cut even on the mortgage, and maintain the equity/rate there?
   
3. I recognize that we've been privileged/blessed to be in a really good situation over the past few years. Any additional advice/concerns about the above? Anything I'm not considering? Thanks!
   

Throwaway account. Genuinely, this is my sibling's situation, not mine. Much of the 'story' of this is what the sibling related to me. Sibling has had financial issues in the past. This may belong in FinancialAdvice, but I sense things may beyond money fixing...
Sibling is in Alabama, I am in Georgia.
Sibling is self employed in a profession that involves taking many direct payments, and uses Square to accept those payments. Sibling purchased a home in August of last year. They claim that they [attempted] to use Square to make the mortgage payments, however apparently the mortgage company never actually accepted them. Sibling and their spouse apparently ignored many letters before realizing the situation and were months past due. Between them and the mortgage company, it was finally realized the failure to make/accept via Square, so Sibling began the process of getting the money back from Square and succeeded.
Sibling apparently also banks with a non-mainstream online-only bank, so then getting the funds from Square to that bank was a process. The mortgage company apparently told Sibling that they HAD to overnight a cashiers at the time she was finally in possession of the funds. They get online bank to increase withdrawal/ATM limits, and over the course of several days they get the cash in hand... at this point I'm just going to round the amount to 15 thousand dollars.
Sibling takes cash to local, mainstream brick-and-mortar bank they have a car note with and get a cashiers check, takes that to FedEx, and send check and paperwork as instructed.
It takes two weeks for the mortgage company to come back and say "Got your FedEx envelop - and the paperwork - but no check." Commence cashiers check cancellation process... money is locked up for 90 days according to brick-and-mortar bank.
1-2 weeks later, the foreclosure notice is in the newspaper and they're getting notice of foreclosure. (Don't ask me what notices they've gotten or ignored, I'm aware these things don't happen overnight.) I would have thought all this is was a scam if I didn't find the notice in the newspaper myself.
Courthouse steps sale is in 10 days.
I am liquid enough to help my sibling - I've known about the situation for 48 hours at this point. After the initial story from my sibling, my spouse and I slept on the situation and decided that if there was something we could do, we should do it...
I asked sibling "If a wire or ACH could happen today, would it solve this problem." They waited until the end of the day to call/text me back (they were working, maybe I didn't imply strongly enough that I was willing to make a payment). That was Friday. Little/no contact since then from sibling.
So, I have two areas of questions:

1. What do you think the options for my siblings actually are at this point? The mortgage company has referred the whole thing to Brock and Scott for the foreclosure, and with them involved, it's not clear to me whether a payment is possible at this point, who it would be to, a deadline, etc... (Not that I'm trying to get directly involved). Apparently bankruptcy is an option to stop foreclosure? If the story is true, perhaps they could even exit bankruptcy before it's complete?
   
2. If I do help my sibling, are there logical safeguards I should put in place? Some form of written agreement? Do you have recommendations on how to go about this? I want to verify the status of the cashiers check cancellation and that that money IS coming back, and if possible or logical draw up an actual contract with my sibling about this (if that's a logical thing to do?)
   

I greatly appreciate any input you may have. (including if it is just a statement of direct advice to my sibling of 'Go get an attorney.')
I have redacted some known details or minutiae for the sake of length of this post. Happy to fill in any gaps I have knowledge of.

I purchased my first Tesla, an M3, and I'm getting financing though a 3rd party so I listed that in the order. The loan company ACHed the money into my bank account and Tesla is saying I need a check from the finance company made out to me.
Can I just bring a check from my personal account with me for the amount or get a cashier's check from the bank? As I said I've tried reaching out twice to Tesla and they haven't responded.
Thank you

Her post: https://www.reddit.com/relationship_advice/s/ooTwyFNwWk She only showed me this a few days ago, but for the past couple of weeks my now ex gf has been curating the truth to extract as much validation as she can from this situation, and has prevented me from commenting or sharing my side.
She admits that I actually said - that I bought a house with us in mind. I did say that. When i first met her, I was moving away to LA. I had already lived in a home that was paid off for 12 years, but when i met her; i decided that maybe it's best and continue to build a life here, and should things work out, we could figure out a future together.
I had been looking at the market and one day, an amazing house came on the block, for 300k less than it was a months ago. I pounced and went to see it. That night i told her i saw a place, i even sent her the photos and said, i'm going to place an offer, which i did.
She seemed to love the place and see how much of an upgrade it would be from my current place - this is a 2M house, with 4 bathrooms, 3 bedrooms, 2 living rooms and most importantly, a garage as my cars kept getting stolen since i didn't have one at my current place.
There was never mention of us moving in together right away, at the time we were together for 6 months, wayyyy too soon. We weren't even saying "i love you yet" - and i did say that once actually, and she just didn't return it anyways.
That being said, since we spend 95%% of our time sleeping at my place when we see each other once a week, figure this would be good for us, and when it is time, we could move in together there and go from there.
She loved the place, from what she said, this was supposed to be a positive.
Now let's rewind though.
3 months into the relationship, she asked to borrow 4000$. I was not comfortable with it, but as usual, she made herself seem so much in need, that I couldn't say no and just break up with her there, but now I realize i should have. She guilted me sayinf that couples have to work together and be there for each other and all that jazz.
The fact is, within those first 3 months, i had brought her to LA while i had to be there on business and the total cost of the week that she was there was around 3K. Then, over xmas, we went to another city, another 2-3K, as well as a punta cana vacation for 7K. So after all that is when she decided to ask me, and you don't need to be a genius to realize thst she chose me because clearly, she pinned me as having the money to.
Had this been my wife or long term gf, this wouldn't of been an issue, but 3 months in - this was a big flag and i talked to her about it. As usual, and as a pattern throughout this relationship, she would get extremely angry, lose her cool and make me feel bad for "questioning her character".
So, fast forward to me actually moving into this house over a 3 week period. She helped none whatsoever, never offered and my own family, friends, and people who were working at the house asked me about it apl the time. Oh she has school, oh she texts me though and so on. Completely MIA until of course friday or saturday night where she wanted to go for dinners or go to shows - that we did, of course.
One day, once her exams had tailed down and she told me she was waking up early to write a paper, i saw that she posted a sunshine kissed selfie saying: yoga! Meal prep! Coffee! Sunshine!
And i wrote her privately: " you know, i feel you could have at least offered to help in some way today". Again, she loses it, tells me : " you know you don't have to tell me something just because it bothers you" and then eventually she says, and i will never forget this ever : " don't you think you're expecting a little much of me for 7/8 months of dating"?
I was shocked. For some reason, pressuring your bf for a 4000$ loan 3 months in, but offering help in any way over a 3 week period is too much.
I called it off, decided i don't need her and this relationship wouldn't work with this set of values we don't share.
A couple of days later, after trying whatever she could to flip this whole fight on me, constantly chaging the goal post as a pattern i had identified and made her aware of repeatedly over those 7/8 months, she eventually showed up unannounced, apologizing profusely, and apparently seeming to genuinely recognize that it wasn't right, and she could have offered.
I took some of the responsibility once she did, and said that maybe, i could have been more direct as to when and how.
We resolved, we started to laugh again, this was a fight that we would "learn from" we both said.
Well, last week we disagreed for another simple issue, and she blew up as she does, yelling, calling my life chaotic, calling me eveything she can think of, and then says she resents me for wanting her to help with the house when she had exams!
Basically she took back the apology fully and stormed out of the house, i did not chase her. I did not text her, and i did not want to negotiate at all anymore.
The next morning she said she acted like that because i told her she was fucked. Tbh, i don't remember saying that, but i probably did as she was having a massive blow up.
I apologized for saying that she is fucked because afterall, whatever i do is in my control and tried my very best to get her to see that blowing up like that, is her behavior to be accountable for.
That's when she shared the original thread... again - no words, shocked that for a couple of weeks in the background she had been farming all these comments about me, sharing our personal stuff and curating it in a way to make herself look like, you guessed it, a "victim" whose boyfriend "bought her a house"?
We met off hinge. She asked to borrow 4000$ from me 3 months in, and I told her since then that it just didn't look good at all, and I'd hate to have something like that i couldn't even share with my friends / family.
The facts are that she only shared as the relationship went on:

• she is over 40k in debt
• Got fired from her nursing job because the educator had it in for her
• Missed out on receiving funding from the school because of their online portal
• Wasn't able to apply to graduate because the school didn't let her know properly
• Hates her parents even though they gabe her a car, paid for her exams and other failed attempts at schooling in the past
• Told me that her last relationship was "toxic" and she didn't see a future with him but stayed with him for 3 years and when they broke up, he threatened to jump off their building, same building she currently lives in - where 1 bedroom costs more than my previous mortage did for the 12 years that i paid it.

Overall, yes i had reason to play it slow with her. I didn't want her moving in on a technicality, or making me responsible for all her bills or getting trapped if things didn't work out.
I didn't buy her a house, i bought my house, in cash, paid in full and she was well aware that.
I bought a house because I had settling down in my current city in mind after meeting and had hoped it would work out.
But here she is complaining about if she would have an office in it, for...nursing?
A shoe room? I have 25 pairs of shoes in a closet. The spare bedroom would be for a baby's room, possibily if my future half is comfortable with that. Discussions would be had but i realized that discussions would never be had with her.
She has rage in her mind, a wild sense of entitlement and at present time is currently getting evicted from her apartment, and has no full time job but all the time in the world to make reddit posts for validation.
This problem is solved, she is not going to move in, and i am accountable for my house and hope she becomes accountable for "her house".
I welcome any comments / questions but i know I was dealing with a highly problematic person who will never truly realize her ways.

I am in desperate need of $50 for a Lyft or an Uber to get home. Long story short I was with my friend and we got pulled over. My friend (the driver) ended up getting arrested and having their car towed. The cops would only bring me to the closest gas station. I am still about 35 miles from my house. Also I just had ACL surgery a couple weeks ago so walking really isn't an option for me. I just paid bills so I literally have $0.17 cents in my bank account. I only have a few friends and no one is able to help me. I don't have any family ( they are deceased) I am not sure what I am going to do. Anything would be so appreciated. Thank you so much I have paypal or venmo or cashapp

Hey everybody, wanted to share our details, help hold us accountable as well as provide info to anyone interested.
Mrs and I both have FT jobs, our primary interest right now is in financial independence. We live in a LCOL area and both WFH at different companies (I'm in tech, she does govt/tech work). 2 kids (high school and middle school). It's a full house, lots of pets etc.
Combined Assets:

• House (450k value estimate, probably more as its had a number of upgrades, paid in full)
• 600k in various age 59 retirement accounts (401k, IRA, etc)
• 400k in brokerages
• 230k in vested company equity (RSUs)
• 20k in HYSA accounts
• 2 commodity cars, paid for and both good working condition
• 30k in 529's for the kids but not really counting that either. Will probably double that this year.

Liabilities, none. No house debt, no car debt, no student loans, no CC debt. Ok, that's not entirely true. There is 8k on a store card to pay for a kitchen upgrade, but this 8k is just sitting there at 0% for 24 months. I could pay it on Monday but there's been no rush. I've committed to paying it off at some point this year to keep the missus happy.
Net income is too high for our expenses and living area. Combined we're about 850k/year. Basically, salary plus company RSUs, so that is not all straight salary. It has had some variability to it.
Expenses are about 5k a month. If you do the math, assume about half of our income is going to taxes and 401k/IRAs (which are maxed out), we live on 60k/year and have roughly 350k/year left over. That 350k goes to more investments, savings, 529's or the occasional extra thing like a vacation or some fun money. In the past that money has gone to those things plus paying off the mortgage, house upgrades and the like. But its been like that, we're actually fairly frugal so well over 90% of that goes to more saving. It's not torture, we enjoy it.
In past years we did make less, so this is a bit of a record acceleration year for income. It has not always been like this.
My projections for the next 3 years are fairly linear and are bound to be wrong, because our progression has not been linear so far:

• 2m in assets by the end of 2024
• 2.5m in assets by the end of 2025
• 3.1m in assets by the end of 2026

Past that I couldn't predict. We passed the 1m mark about a year ago so I could be way off with how things could accelerate now. I think you can see that we are big on saving and investing, at this point we really enjoy the progress and talking to each other about it, and trying to do better at it. As I said our goal right now is complete financial independence, I'm not sure what we'll do with that but we don't like to be beholden to anybody or anything.
Long term we'd like to figure out how to get a 2nd home in a different area. We intend to always keep this house, keep it in the family and get a 2nd home somewhere for us. But the timeframe for that is probably 8+ years out so we don't have that figured out yet. We wouldn't be doing it before both kids are grown and out of high school. We also intend to be travelling more often at that point, so we'll have more things to spend our money on.