Letter of withdrawal from daycare

Daycare told me at pickup today that my son has hfm and the spots would get worse and more in number, and that he has to stay home until they are crusted over. I want to follow the directions and prevent other children from getting sick, but....I'm doubting it's hfm. He's my first kid and quite healthy (he's avoided at least 90% of daycare illnesses and in 2 years has only had to be kept home sick 3 times) so I'm worried that I'm wrong in thinking it's just a few mosquito bites from the night before. He was waving them off and came to tell me there were bugs on his neck so we went inside since it was late anyway.
The "spots" in question is one on the back of his hand, on on his bicep, and three on the back of his neck (one kind of closer to his jaw below his ear), that all look like classic mosquito bites. The other child at daycare with hfm was clearly sick, rash around his mouth, spots/warty looking large bumps on his hands (backs and palms), and not at all himself which was a complete 180 from when I saw the that child in the morning. Basically he looked nothing at all like my son is right now.
Over the evening, nothing further had progressed. No more spots appeared, no rash anywhere, no fever, appetite is just fine, no change in behavior. Checked him head to toe at bathtime. I'm here wondering if I'm completely off base since I've never dealt with an illness before. Daycare described it to me that it was going to get a lot worse by suppertime - that it would be clear he had it in mere hours once they noticed the spots (although I do not know when they noticed the spots could be morning could be 4pm at pick up time). This hasn't happened and google isn't showing me anything that looks like the spots I'm seeing on my kid.
I don't mind staying home with him at all, in fact I often offer to keep my healthy child at home during inclement weathestaff shortages to ensure that parents who don't have a work from home option get dibs on the spot that day. But in this case, I don't feel it's necessary. Obviously if it progresses and he's clearly got it in the morning he will be staying home.
But I suppose I'm asking for advice from experiencex parents on whether daycare was correct that it would start getting worse right away (and if it doesn't then it isn't hfm) or if they were wrong (and I should keep him home because he will eventually get worse in the next few days).
Help a first time mom please!! I don't want to make the daycare mad, since it's a great one although a bit sticky on the sick policy (I previously had to get 2 specialists to write letters supporting my child simply has post nasal drip that aggravates a wierd lung thing that causes him to cough and the two symptoms should not be used to send him home sick). So I am a bit... Less than ready to accept this suggestion to keep him home due to the coincidence of the bugs biting the night before. I'm rambling....thanks in advance for all the insight so I can learn about this!!

Untying the Knots of the Twelve-Letter Alphabet
https://www.astrologyinstitute.com/articleprofile/articles/2016/untying-the-knots-of-the-twelve-letter-alphabet
12 Letter Alphabet Exposed
https://westernastrology.net/12-letter-alphabet-exposed-part-a/
https://westernastrology.net/12letter-alphabet-exposed-part-b/
Liberating Uranus and Aquarius – From Each Other
http://www.astrologyinstitute.com/articleprofile/articles/2016/liberating-uranus-and-aquarius-from-each-other
Probing Pluto and Scorpio, Clarifying Neptune and Pisces
http://www.astrologyinstitute.com/articleprofile/articles/2015/untangling-astrologys-symbols-part3
10 Astrology Habits to Break.
https://ambientastrology.com/articles/2016/3/25/10-astrology-habits-to-break
https://soulfriendastrology.com/category/learning-astrology/
12 Letter Alphabet Exposed
FIRST HOUSE
While the words; are a manner of speech there might be less confusion if they were replaced with "present": The first house shows how we present as an individual. This presentation includes attitude, physical health, demeanor and appearance, among other things.
The first house is much more than how we strike out as an individual. It can actually show a ‘wait and see attitude’. If a passive sign is on the ascendant or the ascendant ruler in a passive sign there will be less ‘striking out’ and more withdrawal or cautious approach to life.
With other factors such as the house location of its ruler and aspects to the ascendant, the first house shows temperament style and general attitude to life, which may be nothing akin to Mars or Aries.
The odds are only one in twelve that the sign on the ascendant will be Aries and the wide scope of other possible expressions cannot all be described as Arian or Martian.
Neither should we restrict the red planet to its daytime domicile of Aries. It is also the nocturnal ruler of Scorpio although this is rarely considered or understood.
Associating Mars with the first house also ignores the other two planets which have a connection to this house.
The first is Mercury, which has its joy in the first house. The joys of the planets is a worthwhile study of its own.
Mercury has a natural association with the brain and head and this correlates well with the association of the first house with the head.
Mercury is also associated with speech and communication.
Mars has no natural association with the head or brain, unless you are thinking of using your head as a battering ram!
In the system of planetary joys Mars is placed in the sixth house of injuries and sickness, a place where it is at home.
The first house straddles the boundary between day and night which is an apt fit for adaptable Mercury as the go-between.
Saturn also has a first house association because this is where the soul is entrapped within the body as it incarnates. Saturn is the natural ruler of doorways and the first house is the soul’s doorway into physical life. The eighth house of death is the exit doorway, also associated with Saturn.
SECOND HOUSE:
Yes Taurus is about stability and physical comforts and pleasure, but has little to do with money itself. Venus, the planet which rules Taurus, is about the comforts that money can buy, the adornments and beautiful things. But money itself is represented by Mercury, the natural ruler of exchange and financial dealings. Mercury does the buying and Venus does the enjoying. Venus does not represent money; that is Mercury’s domain.
Jupiter the planet of wealth and prosperity, has a natural association with the second house. In the Chaldean order of the planets Jupiter follows Saturn. Saturn is associated with the first house, Jupiter with the second house.
THIRD HOUSE:
It is understandable that, at first glance, the third house would seem to have an association with Gemini and Mercury.
However in previous generations it was clearly understood that the third house was the house of the "goddess", and the Moon had a special relationship with this house.
In horary astrology the Moon is frequently seen as conveying messages between other planets in its role as ‘the translator of light’. Among the seven classical planets it is the fastest moving body, linking planets as it aspects one and then to another. This sequential linking is very significant in questions about communication, linking people together, or the movement of goods. In this latter respect it also has an association with transport.
FOURTH HOUSE:
Historically the 4th house is associated with foundations and property, the land, deep roots, mines and wealth from under the ground.
Compare these fixed traits to that most fluid and movable of planets: the Moon. This is not a good fit. The changeable Moon is much better suited to the busy comings and goings of the 3rd house.
In the ancient model of the “4 Ages of Man” the IC is associated with the winter of our lives. Yet in the northern hemisphere where Western astrology arose the Sun passes through Cancer at the height of summer. Neither is the 4th house a good fit for Cancer.
Historically the 4th house is associated with the father, not the mother.
FIFTH HOUSE:
The Sun is the supreme ‘Commander-in-Chief’, the symbol of might and mastery, power, truth, light and enlightenment. The superior planets genuflect and step backwards in retrograde motion when they come face to face in opposition with the Sun, and all the planets disappear in his blinding light when in conjunction with the Sun.
The fifth house is the house of fun and frivolity, parties pleasure and entertainment. In a sense this is the most superficial of houses and is in no way deserving as the home of the Lord of the Heavens.
The Sun represents so much more than parties, children, pleasure and sporting games. The importance of these activities pales into insignificance when faced with the majesty of his presence. In many religions and spiritual systems the image of god or the force which guides the universe has a solar representation.
To suggest that the Sun is restricted to the rulership of the house of fun and creativity is to diminish his great power and demonstrates a profound misunderstanding of his role in the heavens and in astrological interpretation.
In the diagram above describing the joys of the planets we see that the Sun rejoices in the ninth house, the house of higher learning, spirituality, and the search for the ultimate meaning of life. The joys of the planets describe places where planets are most comfortable and ‘feel at home’. The Sun is much more comfortable than in the ninth house of spirituality than in the fifth house of frivolity.
Neither is Leo a good fit for the fifth house as it is regarded as a barren sign because of its dryness. The 5th has long been known as the house of sex procreation and children. In horary astrology in questions of fertility and in electional astrology when choosing a suitable time for conception Leo on the ascendant or on the fifth house cusp is generally avoided because of its association with infertility and sterility.
To link the sign associated with barrenness with the house associated with fertility and creativity shows a misunderstanding of basic astrological principles.
SIXTH HOUSE:
Confusions relating to the meaning of the sixth house are worthy of an article on its own.
The association with work in the sense of career or profession can be attributed to a misreading of Lilly where he refers to the 6th house as the house of service. He was actually referring to servitude and servants.
The modern equivalent are the working poor doing menial jobs, in the service of another. There has never been, at least until recent times, a sense that the 6th house is associated with anything resembling a career. Historically this is, among other meanings, the house of slaves. While perhaps there are few real slaves in the Western world, the unskilled worker going from job to job is a close equivalent. These workers are typically more lacking in skills, rather than being skilled.
Going back to the objection mentioned above that Virgo is focused I am not sure how focus is a noteworthy trait of the sixth house, or even that Virgo is especially focused. Virgo is after all a double-bodied sign. Scorpio Aries and Capricorn also have some claim to being focused.
It is more common for people to confuse the sixth house with Virgo because of Virgo’s association with health. However the sixth house is not the house of health; that honour belongs to the first house. The sixth house is the house of ill-health and also injuries, the opposite of health. The preoccupation with exercise and diet typically associated with Virgo is better explained by the combination of the dry earth qualities of Virgo when combined with its discerning ruler: Mercury.
It is the first house which is the house of life and health and vitality. Mercury rejoices in this house and is much more comfortable here than in the sixth house of sickness and injuries.
It is Mars which rejoices in the sixth house. It is of course the minor malefic and is well suited to the house where the slings and arrows of outrageous misfortune beset us all from time to time. Incidentally in mundane astrology the sixth house is associated with the military which has an obvious connection with Mars.
SEVENTH HOUSE:
Yes the seventh house is about relationships of all types. As well as amorous relationships and contractual business type relationships, also included are adversarial relationships with open enemies and those involving a sporting or other type of contest.
Relationships involving open conflict can hardly be confused with the graciousness associated with Libra or the pleasantness associated with Venus. These relationships could better be described as Martian. As the enemy rides over hill towards you, rifle at the ready with bayonet attached, Venus is nowhere to be seen. These situations are better described by Mars. So should we associate Aries and Mars with the seventh house, as well as Libra and Venus? The logic is similar. It should not be ignored that the seventh house is as much about engagement with the enemy as it is with the lover or friend.
The seventh house is about ‘the other’ we engage with, for whatever reason, whether it be the terrorist or the lover, the violent bully or the loving spouse. The relationships associated with the seventh house can be associated with love or hate. The seventh house is primarily about the people we engage with, and the type of engagement cannot be restricted to just Venus or Libra. The planet which usually best describes the type of engagement is the one ruling the sign on the seventh house cusp or a planet conjoining the descendant.
EIGHTH HOUSE:
The confusion concerning the eighth house is connected both with the adoption of Pluto as Scorpio's modern ruler and the adoption of the '12 letter Alphabet'; system by some astrologers. In the 12 letter Alphabet, invented by Zip Dobyns, the meaning of the houses planets and signs are merged. For example the eighth house, Scorpio, and Pluto are seen to have a similar theme, referred to as an archetype. Pluto's association with transformation and regeneration and Scorpio's association with sex are both transferred to the eighth house.
However the eighth house is the house of death. While it's true that some astrologers have associated the eighth house with sex because sexual orgasm is sometimes called ‘the little death, the purpose of sex is to procreate, to bring life into the world, not death.
Previous to the modern era the eighth house was not associated with sex. This modern confusion is perpetrated by a misunderstanding of the primary functions of the houses. Sex is a fifth house matter. Death and bringing life into the world are opposite things. One should not be confused with the other.
I have often heard it said that death is only one form of transformation and somehow this justifies assigning transformation as a core meaning for the eighth house, which in turn validates Scorpio’s and Pluto’s association with the eighth house.
It is ironic that Pluto's mythical association with rape is rarely mentioned in conversations about eighth house sexual activity.
The tangled web of confusions associated with the interchange of Scorpio Pluto and the eighth house is mind boggling and really does take us a long way from the real meaning of the eighth house. Followers of the 12 Letter Alphabet system associate intimacy with the eighth house because of its new association connection with Pluto.
The core meanings of the eighth house have to do with death in the physical and real sense; fear and loss; the resources of those we engage with, and inheritance.
The eighth house is not a particular pleasant place no matter how much we might like to romanticize it or give it a positive spin. The sign on the cusp of the eighth house and the planet which rules that sign are what is relevant in any type of astrological interpretation of the 8th house.
NINTH HOUSE:
We tend to liken Jupiter to philosophy and religion and the attribution of Jupiter to the 9th House fits fairly well. (Jupiter is also the planet associated with the Ninth in the wheel of houses that begins with Saturn as the First.) The Ninth was the place of the “Sun God” in ancient astrology and was strongly associated with public religious practice; yet, like the Third, it was also associated with dreams, prophecy, and divination. The Ninth House being associated with higher education or long journeys is a later addition.
The planet in joy in the Ninth House is the Sun and, for a place that is cadent, the Ninth gets a lot of sunlight and the Sun can be happy here. It also fits well with the deification of the Sun’s power in many cosmologies and religions throughout history. It may also conform to the image of Sun as a planet of higher intellect, as the light of reason.
TENTH HOUSE:
Astrologers after my lifetime or yours will look at this affiliation with bewilderment. Archetypally mixing the House of career, reputation, and fame to Saturn and Capricorn is itself enough to throw out the entire Twelve Letter Alphabet system.
You might retort, “But it’s the place of one’s boss!” I answer that there are many kinds of bosses and they’re not all oppressive. The dimensions of leadership and mentorship – solar and not saturnine factors – are prominent Tenth House factors.
The 10th is the traditional place of one’s “action” – career, calling, fame and reputation. I include a larger sense of “vocation”, so that if you work retail by day but are a political activist or animal rights advocate otherwise, the latter would be included within your Tenth House. If a “lifestyle” includes neighborhood vigilantism, being a “survivalist”, or attending a lot of funerals, that person’s Tenth House would qualify as Saturnine.
Capricorn, as the cardinal earth sign, governed by a heavy nocturnal (feminine sign) Saturn, and the place and time of least light in the Northern Hemisphere, is completely out of place in the public and daylight-filled Tenth. Because the Tenth is place of authority, it is far closer in meaning to the Sun than the gray planet Saturn.
ELEVENTH HOUSE:
In ancient times the 11th, the “Place of the Good Spirit (or daimon)”, was a place of fortune and abundance. According to traditional sources Jupiter is in joy in the Eleventh, befitting a place that is considered so fortunate. (The Eleventh is the House opposite the 5th, the Place of Good Fortune and the joy of Venus, the other benefic.) The Eleventh House became the place of “hopes and wishes” and later the place of friendship and social groups; “hopes and wishes” is more in line with the original meaning of the Eleventh House.
Is this like the fixed air sign Aquarius? The “Water-Bearer” has a linear mental quality and a tendency to become conceptual that is not particularly like the Eleventh House in its original meanings. Aquarius is a sign of social responsibility and objective mind, and Aquarius relates well to a diurnal (masculine sign) Saturn that is a lighter Saturn than the one who governs Capricorn. However, if you confine the Eleventh House to friendships and social groups, the affiliation with the diurnal Saturn isn’t such a problem.
Things become much more confusing when astrologers mix up Aquarius with the outer planet Uranus, the planet of eccentricity, suddenness, and genius, and then try to bring in the Eleventh House. Uranus is quite different from the fixed mental “human” sign Aquarius. Uranus is rebellious, radically individualistic, and is deliberately outside convention. Aquarius, the sign opposite Leo, is humanitarian and oriented more toward groups and cultures than individuals. To bring this confusion to the Eleventh House only makes this problem worse; it obscures the original benevolent and protective quality of this house which is well demonstrated by Jupiter’s traditional association.
TWELTH HOUSE:
There are many difficulties here, and many are based on the distorted ways that the sign Pisces has been defined. But first let’s look at the Twelfth House by itself.
Like the Sixth and Eighth, the Twelfth is also disconnected to the Ascendant and is also a place about life’s difficulties. The Twelfth is a cadent house that in ancient astrology was the Place of the “Bad Spirit.” In the outer world the Twelfth is where we locate prisons, confinement in institutions, and dark hidden places. More internally, this is the place of being haunted – by previous karma, psychological “unfinished business,” and other manners of “self-doing” that come about because of what we cannot see. Psychological astrologers have looked to the Twelfth House for unacknowledged factors that may wreak havoc on one’s person and within one’s relationships. This is in keeping with the qualities of this house.
This all seems very different from the mutable watery sign Pisces that is flowing, changeable, and can develop different disguises for its personal and social roles. Pisces, as a quality of mind, has a strongly intuitive nonlinear bent. Unlike the planet Neptune, however, natives with prominent Pisces placements manage to maintain their identity even if that identity is not well-defined. Both the sign Pisces and its purported ruler Neptune are a far cry from the vice grip many of have experienced when in conditions of external or internal confinement.
Jupiter, the great benefic and the traditional ruler of Pisces, is even farther away from the significations of the Twelfth House. Jupiter – especially in the feminine sign Pisces – brings intuition of possibilities that is often called “faith” or “hope”. The Twelfth, however, is where cold reality comes at us from behind often with harmful intent; it is far closer to Saturn than Jupiter. And Saturn is, of course, the “joy” of the Twelfth House.

Hello to all who dwell in the hell that is The Great Refund Delay of 2024.
I filed 1/29, ID Verify letter 3/8 and the Shut up and Wait 60 Days letter 4/8.
In my endless research trying to understand the processing delay this year, and trying to get information that might allow me to expedite the return of my money, I learned that Principal Financial Services did not submit information about retirement account early withdrawals to the IRS until April 30, 2024! Principal did not send information to the IRS about early withdrawals, and the associated withholdings, until April 30, 2024! WTAF?
When checking the newly updated Wage & Income Transcripts today, I saw that information from early withdrawals from my retirement account, managed by Principal Financial Services, Inc, is missing from the transcripts. I called Principal, for the third time since March, and asked them to confirm that they submitted my account information to the IRS as usual for 2023. She put me on hold three times, I had to ask for confirmation several times, each time being clearer and more concise, until finally she told me about the delay. I insisted on verification in writing. Apparently it is now going to "research' who I will hear from by Friday. We'll see.
When I called the IRS to see if they would confirm that they now have that information, the representative not only would not confirm, she insisted my return was randomly selected for review and that the Shut up and Wait 60 Days letter is no more, it's now Shut up and Wait 120 days.
Hope this might help some of you.
Peas stout!

I NEVER met anyone like that until that day! I never wanted to see MM again. He should have left things at that and stopped pursuing me since that year in 1989. That would have been better for him and I. It's NEVER healthy relationship if guy or girls's parents have bad reactions or disapprove. By 1988, I was retail store manager and hadn't done ANYTHING bad that I am insulted for. I deserved good things in my life because I am/was a good person. MM brags he has time machine and he has place picked out to take me, does he???? I don'thave to do anything at all. I can die of gun, arrow, weapon, hunger, animal bite, rabies, weather, exposure to elements, infection, illness, fractures or any number of things, whether he takes me forward or back in time. Same risks in foreign country because I won't be citizen, insured, have $ or a good job in an office. #death more probable He took away my reasons to live but I don't think suicide is the answer. I didn't LIKE him because he hurt my feeling. He kills me because I SAID no to being his slave. He wasn't the right guy for me and I am OFFENDED and HURT by everything he said about me online or offline. He kills me because he stalked me since 1989. That's the statistics. REALITY: the longer guy #stalks woman, they kill! He killed me by making me appear to be bad mother, or sleazy or whatever. I actually THOUGHT it was different guy stalking me.
Can people send healing energy to that guy so he can finally let go and stop convincing his friends to target me for his "revenge". Obsession isn't healthy. I'm worried about my safety with a stalker that persistent. Statistics don't suggest that I survive. He needs to be healed, not suggest how I or situation needs to be "fixed" for him to date me!
I wish my brother R had bet him up dead in 1997 or whenever they met. I wish my dad DEFENDED me instead of "joining" that bad pack. I wish those "time machine grandchildren" had DEFENDED me instead of him! Life could have better for more of my family without pimping any kids out for $ like someone DECIDED while thinking of "revenge" on me. If my kids cried? I won't have any reason to forgive MM at any time of my life. MM wants a hooker? He can find some and leave me ALONE. He made sure he has $ to pay for them because he brags he stole from me, but my FAMILY kept secret for him?
I hear them cheering for MM getting child support order(?) to get $ from someone he took money from AND MADE CHILDREN IN A LAB WITH FAKE SIGNATURE? Is that how bad America has dropped? #testtubekids My tubes were tied in 2002, so he should be facing criminal charges: #harassment! Because I wasn't asked to appear for OFFICIAL lab testing so DIFFERENT WOMAN IS THE MOTHER, and so he needs to stop talking trash about me. I am abolitionist and I don't belong to him. I think if his dad was KKK, that he should have proved it by killing the white guy focused on black women. If he was under any kind of spell, it could have been removed. MM made a choice and he wasn't ever made powerless just because I read about natural cures and herbal remedies. MM's demand to make me be a slut isn't appealing for me. I had goals, MM, even if YOU NEVER ASKED back in 1988. Did he had relationship with the next lady renting room at same house? I moved when we broke up, so did that happen?
Is he responsible for day of missing mail, so I can't RESPOND to legal notices or important letters? Is he really bragging online bout having my kid since he was 6? What kid? I had THREE in my house from birth and know where all three boys are right now? Which school district needs to be sued? Which daycare?? CAN WE CALL FBI TO CREATE REUNION OR CHARGES NOW instead of using social media to harass me??? Yes, not they claim that my SIL swears that I asked her to kill my kid, so she could have big $ and management or CEO career but I fulfill some illegal sex contract? Snuff films weren't me, but my aunt looked like me.

Dad,
After searching my feelings throughout a turbulent relationship with you, I began to feel that you do not truly love me or your granddaughter. I think seeing how distant you and (my daughter) actually were when you were here in (the country that I live) opened my eyes to the distance that has always been between us. I became vulnerable to you and tried to be emotionally honest with you in the hope that we could elevate our relationship. I allowed you some time to do some emotional deep diving so that we could both participate in a conversation of this sort without your initial defense mechanisms kicking in.
More than a month has gone by and I think the lack of response speaks louder than any words that I could hear from you and my feelings feel validated. If you needed time you could have let me know that instead of letting me sit in my own head for a month losing sleep over trying to work out what is wrong with you or I. If you thought I was wrong you could have defended yourself. If you thought I was right you could have consoled me. The lack of any response only shows me your distilled apathy. I can’t imagine that putting out this fire was a priority for you.
I find myself writing draft after draft of this letter trying to be completely honest with you about how I feel about my childhood and our ensuing relationship but I find the more honest I am the more cruel my letter becomes. When I decide to pull punches to placate you, the more inauthentic I feel so I will not be getting into the weeds with you. I do not wish to be cruel and I do not wish to be dishonest so I find myself in a stalemate.
I do not want to tear you down nor do I want you to be unhappy. Without getting real with you I cannot get rid of all the baggage that has kept me from having a meaningful relationship with you. I don’t know what has prevented you from having anything more than a superficial relationship with me or (my daughter) on your end but for now I think I need to withdraw from participating in this relationship. Many times I have anticipated having a heart to heart with you but I think the willingness to do so has only come from my end. You more than anyone else have the context to truly understand who I am and where I came from which is why our wooden relationship disheartens me so. The disparity between the potential and the actuality of our relationship is regrettable.
My focus now needs to be on (my daughter), ensuring that she grows up in an environment free from the same emotional barriers I've experienced. If, in the future, I feel better equipped to revisit our relationship, I may reach out. But for now, I need to reevaluate where I invest my energy and attention for both my family's sake and for my own mental health.
I am not going to get in the way of you having a relationship with (my daughter) and I am not going to force you to either. If you would like to talk to her you are free to do so however, if I can see your apathy affecting her the same way that I have known it to affect myself and (my sister), I will intervene.
I truly hope that you take care, and live your best life.
-Me
For some context I was raised a Jehovah's Witness. My mom left the religion and my dad when I was around 1 and both parents married again very shortly after. At 8 years old I was present for the suicide of my step father, and my step mother was neglectful and abusive until she left without saying goodbye. My dad remarried a woman who was closer to my age than his own and the JW influence really picked up from there. Although I lived with my mom in the summer, I was taught that my mom was to be shunned if I wanted to be a JW, and really in that family there was no choice but to become a JW. I was taught that loving the only parent that actually showed me unconditional love would make it so that I could not have a relationship with god. My mom had her own demons but I have no doubt that she truly loved me and my siblings. The only way I could get praise from them was to accept more responsibilities in the religion. There was always major internal conflict inside of me.
When I was 15 we got a call that mom too had killed herself and from there it was much easier to please those around me because I would not have to say goodbye or hurt my mom for JW reasons. So I made the biggest mistake of my life and got baptized as a JW. As a kid I was so messed up that both my sister and I had bald spots from pulling our hair out. We never got therapy after what we witnessed with my step-dad, even at the minimum school counselor's were never informed. After my mom died it was just the same.
College was discouraged for JW reasons. I got married young and eventually came to my senses about the religion and that could not be reconciled with my wife and I got divorced. If I were to directly announce that I was through being a JW I would be disowned by my entire family so instead I essentially ran away to a different country to start a new life. And because the relationship with my dad focused primarily on that fucking religion everything became very forced.
I got married, and I had a baby girl, when she was about 1 we were considering a trip to my hometown so that my dad could meet my wife and daughter. I had not seen my dad in about 5 years but he said that he had plans to watch the lunar eclipse with his in-laws on the dates that we would be able to fly (across the fucking planet) to see them.
Later I had a near death experience that landed in me in the hospital with my leg broken in 3 places, although I knew my dad had known about the incident he never reached out. Relating to this we had a come to Jesus moment where I invited him to be choose to be in our out of my life because the half ass relationship was not working for me. He pledged to try to call more and that lasted for a little while but we only ever had very superficial water cooler talk, mostly talking about the weather and people I used to know.
I never had my dad on my social media but I would always message him directly with pictures of things that were going on in my life. My wife did add him. And I think scrolling insta and seeing our happy family was satisfying enough to him that he felt he did not have to put any effort into our relationship.
Finally 10 years after moving away from the USA my dad and his wife came to visit us. We planned all sorts of things for us to do and made sure they would have lots of time with their grand daughter who they have only met once before and who they only have talked to because I would video call THEM with her, and who they have only known through my wife's insta, and the messages that I would share with them.
They spent more time looking for souvenirs for my step-mom's nieces than they spent quality time with my daughter. Take them to the park, they would talk to each other a bench. Take them to the beach, they would sit in beach chairs while I play with my daughter. One incident that really hurt me was my step-mom was trying to find a key chain with her nieces names in the local language. My daughter 6 at the time did her damnedest to help her find those key chains. She very obviously wanted one as well and it would have been so easy to be a doting grandparent and drop an extra $2 to make her grand daughters day but as soon as my daughter found her the key chains she wanted, she was out of there and I made sure to get my daughter one.
Every moment they had to make up for lost time with her they squandered and did not appreciate at all, all while being very ungrateful for the work that my wife and I put in to make their vacation the best that it could be.
Saying goodbye at the airport I told my dad that he better keep up communication with her because they are really on her radar now. He was somewhat offended and we said goodbye. Him calling to talk with her lasted about 2 weeks.
The whole trip left me steamed and after a while I started matching my dad's energy and waited for him to contact us. Eventually our country had a large earthquake and he must have seen it on the news and it reminded him that we exist. He said I sure love and miss you guys, are you ok from the earthquake?
For the first time there I considered that he really does not love or care about us. He was never outright abusive but but looking back he was so emotionally neglectful and the way he raised me really ruined the trajectory of my life both in aspects of my relationships with other people and in my education / career. I tried to gently hash this out with him and wrote him a series of texts trying to figure out where we went wrong and try to fix our relationship so that it would be one that I want and not merely tolerate and he completely vanished. After giving him several months to respond I wrote the above letter and was able to feel some closure.
Months after I sent the letter he took my closure away by writing "Hey Son, don’t get in hurry to throw me away yet, I’m writing my own letter and it’s along one."
1 month has passed since he sent that, I check the mail box everyday but he never sent shit.
The end.
PS my sister had been NC with him for 7 years.

Hello, throwaway account because some of my relatives know my reddit handle.
My father passed recently, and suffice to say, our relationship was not great in the past couple of years. One of his life insurance policies was listed as me and his 2 adopted children in another country to be the beneficiaries, however upon receiving the check I was listed as the sole beneficiary. My late father's financial adviser asked me to wire 2/3s of it and I did, not knowing about the law.
Recently I received a letter from a different life insurance policy where the will stated his new wife to be the beneficiary. However, the letter addressed to me stated that I am the sole beneficiary and she needs to fill out a withdrawal of claim form, and I need to submit a new form to claim it.
You can see why this is awkward for me. I did not have a great relationship with my father in the past few years, and was not on speaking terms with him. That said, I did make an effort to emotionally support my stepmom around the time of his passing and so she is not just a random stranger to me anymore.
I guess my questions are: 1) What would you do here? I realize the law is probably on my side, but it's a huge moral dilemma. If I keep the money, can she take me to court?
2) Is there any way I can get back the money I wired over for the first policy before I knew the law?
Thanks.

Ever since I was pregnant, my MIL has had a very different perspective or expectation of what her life and role as a grandparent would be like.
To give a bit more context, she has always had a toxic relationship with my FIL. She has two boys and is very emeshed to both. Almost would call it emotional incest with her oldest (my partner) because she very much used him as a replacement husband when he was growing up since her actual husband was working away and they had an unhealthy relationship.
Anyways. The attachment to my son started when I was pregnant. Because she still was extremely emeshed to my partner, and he was kinda still emmeshed to her. He’s since made a lot of effort healthily distancing himself but it took some work. She’s still not completely used to it.
At my baby shower. Almost every single item I opened. She talked to the whole room of guests how ‘that was coming to her place’ or ‘she couldn’t wait to use that at her house’. Literally almost every thing I opened. ‘I can’t wait to dress him in that’
Keep in mind. I’m not close with her at all. I actually don’t have a lot of respect for her because she takes like 20 bong rips a day and she’s just pretty unhinged when she’s going through withdrawal and doesn’t have weed in her system.
She was really upset when we moved 40 minutes away. Making comments all the time that we practically moved out of province and that they never see us anymore. We still went to see them once or twice a month. And my partner would go more than that.
When the baby was born she had a tough time not respecting boundaries we had at the start. She was debating on come to the hospital when she was sick. Shouldn’t have ever been a debate. Then we asked family no visitors at our house for the first four weeks but she came over at two weeks because she was saying all the time she was heartbroken she never met him yet.
We tried to make a point of only visiting them once a month with baby. Because we have other friends and family to see other weekends and almost every weekend we have plans. She’s asked to start a habit of us seeing them every weekend. Every time we are there she makes a comment about how long it’s been since she’s seen him. And she’s asks my partner all the time to make plans with them and he just comes up with excuses or tells her of our other plans. But she never stops asking.
I had really bad postpartum anxiety and had difficulty letting people hold my baby at the start. She was crying and commenting on it so much that my FIL and BIL both messaged my partner that she was heartbroken and it guilted me into her holding him before I was ready.
She has asked multiple times when she can babysit. She mentions often that she will baby proof her house soon. She got a car seat (that’s expired) from another family member to have for him. She’s asked me if she can get a photo shoot done with just her and my FIL and my baby. She even suggested leaving her job to watch him full time instead of going in daycare if I go back to work. My partner was truthful with her and said that I wouldn’t be comfortable with that because she smokes and she said she’ll quit. But her addiction is so bad I doubt she will. Even if she did, she has a lot of mental health issues that would make me uncomfortable about her watching him. She wants to play parent again. I can tell. I don’t want my son’s relationship with his grandmother to be an unhealthy one because she is overly attached to him.
She was emotionally attached to her kids. Then when they got older and were out of the house more, it became her dog. Her dog just recently passed away and now she suggesting or offering to watch him full time. I’m not even close to her. Like I know she’s his grandmother but don’t you think you should have a good relationship with the mother to ask for something like that!? Absolutely delusional in my mind.
Now we are moving back closer to them soon since we bought land. We will be 10 minutes away and I am terrified that she will be trying to insert herself into our life all the time. My FIL is also going to be working away again and she doesn’t have her dog anymore so I’m scared that she just thinks she’ll find a way to fill that emotional void with my son. Don’t know if she’ll take the hint if we politely decline her all the time.

Hey everyone. I find myself feeling a bit overwhelmed by the sheer volume of information available regarding law school admissions and preparation, I don’t even know where to begin. I’m looking for any advice, recommendations, encouragement, or anything helpful anyone has to offer.
I’m 29 years old and employed full time. I have been contemplating applying to law school and advancing my education for several years. I have finally decided to apply for law school for the fall 2025 school year. I realize now I’m a bit limited on time with regard to LSAT prep, but I am very motivated and diligently preparing.
There are a few things I’m concerned with as I analyze my situation. My undergraduate GPA is not particularly desirable. I graduated in 2021 with a 3.2 GPA. However, I experienced several mental health issues at the end of high school and into my early 20’s. I ended up dropping out of college in 2015 after my second year in school. My GPA showed a sharp decline in my first 2 years of undergrad, with a failed final semester and a 1.9 GPA. I returned to school in 2019 after receiving treatment and therapy (which I continue with now). I petitioned the university to retroactively withdraw my spring 2015 semester from my transcript. My petition was approved, and the failing grades were removed. This helped my GPA and confidence tremendously. I finished my final 2 years in undergrad from 2019 to 2021 with excellent grades, and I made the Deans List 2 out of 5 semesters (I took a full course load in summer 2020). Anywho, I fear my GPA will hold me back as it’s not a true representation of my academic capabilities. I’m unsure how I can compete with outstanding GPAs I’m seeing in this forum and in my research in general.
Another concern of mine is regarding letters of recommendation. As mentioned above, I’m employed full time and I’ve been with my company for 7 years. I am a certified auto subrogation arbitrator, and I have nearly 5 years experience in this field. I feel my work experience will provide a solid foundation for a legal career. However, my employer has a policy against allowing supervisors or managers to write letters of recommendation on behalf of their employees. I have already begun to push back on this. I’ve met with both my immediate supervisor and center manager, both are on my side and ready to help me plead my case to HR and upper management. My fear is our efforts won’t pan out in my favor, and I will have to justify why I could not obtain a letter from my supervisor. I’ve spoken with an admissions advisor at one of the schools I intend to apply to, he was very frank in saying it would be a major red flag on my application if I was unable to produce a letter of recommendation from my supervisor.
I hope to be able to overcome these obstacles but I’m in need of help on where to begin with the application process, and how to achieve excellence in regard to the LSAT and personal statement so I have something to set me apart. I apologize for the ramblings, but I sincerely appreciate any and all input and guidance.

Hi everyone, I'm in the process of applying for a Tourist UK visa, and I'm having troubles with my supporting documents.
1- I have a monthly salary of 550 USD which I get paid in TRY. And I'll add the pay slips from my work place. 2- My monthly expenses are around 200-250 USD and I exchange rest of my salary to USD and keep it in a savings account. So I currently have a savings account with 3100 USD in it. I will add a 6 month statement of this savings account which only features manual deposits from me.
So here's where the dilemma starts. I'm considering not adding my TRY bank account which I receive my salary because I fear it can be used for nitpicking. I receive my salary in a bank where I don't use regurarly, so I withdraw it to another account upon receiving. You might say I could add that secondary TRY account, but it also has quite a few deposits/withdrawals from friends and family.
In 2021, I was denied a UK Tourist visa, and I was given two reasons for this. First, they thought I had no ties to my country, I was fresh out of college and just started working, and secondly they picked out transactions from my TRY bank account statement and questioned them, saying they looked odd and I had showcase my ties to these random transactions in a document with 6 month history. More details about his can be found in my 2021 rejection letter at the end.
At the time of writing, my TRY accounts' balances are zero because I exchange all left overs to USD for savings purposes. Do you think payment slips from work + USD savings account combination is enough? I fear an agent might overanalyse my TRY accounts and use it to reject me like the last time in 2021, so I don't want to include them. And I just don't think I should be required to explain all non-salary charges on my TRY bank statement.
Overall, I'm planning a 5 day long trip this time around, and I have a solid Schengen zone traveling history, the last Schengen visa I received was for 6 months and I traveled to nine countries during its validity period and I followed all the rules to the dot.
For those curious, I'm also leaving my rejection reason from 2021 here:
"You have applied for entry clearance to the United Kingdom. You state that you intend to visit for tourism purposes. I have considered the supporting information provided and the information provided on your application, but I am not satisfied you have met the requirements of the Immigration Rules on this occasion.
When assessing your application, I have to consider whether you intend to leave the United Kingdom at the end of your visit. As part of this, I have to consider the information provided by you about your personal and economic circumstances. When assessing your application, the responsibility is on you to qualify for entry clearance based on your own circumstances and your own intentions.
I note several lump-sum transfers to your bank account, with the account number ending in XXXX, and I am minded that they are inconsistent and disproportionate to your stated income. These include 1,000.00 TRY on 11.06.2021, 2,000.00 TRY on 18.07.2021, and 1,460.00 TRY on 28.09.2021. The documents provided do not demonstrate where those funds have been accumulated. Whilst these documents are indicative of funds held in your name, it does not demonstrate your involvement with your stated profession. They do not in themselves demonstrate that you are in receipt of your stated income.
The evidence provided does not demonstrate the origins of these funds and without further clarification I am not satisfied that, the funds shown in this account are genuinely available to you. I am not satisfied this account is a true reflection of your overall financial circumstances.
You have not declared any dependents or property in your home country and the documents that you have submitted do not demonstrate that you have sufficient ties to your home country that would encourage you to return after a visit to the UK. I am not satisfied you have shown that, on the balance of probabilities, your ties to your home country (or elsewhere) are sufficient to provide you with an incentive to leave the UK at the end of your proposed visit."

My ex-boyfriend and I had a terrible relationship. He was highly abusive verbally and psychologically. Whilst together I kind of knew how to manage him to calm him down and deal with his moods. It was stressful but I didn’t really understand how stressful until we broke up and I began to see what normal was - and his moods got worse than ever without me there to calm him down. He became completely unhinged.
He drank a lot while we were together but mostly behind my back. I realised how much he drank based on the empty spirit and wine bottles and cans of beer in his trash and the side effects when we’d been together for a day and he’d not been able to drink in secret. He had a lot of anger issues anyway but it was much worse when he didn’t have the opportunity to drink.
We broke up in terrible circumstances that will impact my life for years to come.
In the almost 4 months since our break-up, I’ve repeatedly tried to recover my belongings from my ex-boyfriend. This has been extremely stressful. He would switch between refusing to give it to me to saying he was going to throw it in the trash if I didn’t collect it. His friend sent me abusive messages. Throughout all of our communications my ex has been verbally abusive, threatening me (not physically), calling me names… it’s been highly stressful. I was at the point where I thought I’d have to involve the police.
Now, I have finally moved into stable accommodation. I have an incredible new boyfriend, who treats me so well and he’s helped me so much to re establish myself. I’m completely in love and just want to cut ties with my ex.
On Saturday I finally managed to get almost everything back from my ex. I was so relieved. He insisted I see him though and then told me he’d had a breakdown, been put in prison (meaning the hospital), then that he’d had a stroke, then that the doctors hadn’t told him he had a stroke…
He blacked out at the vets and was taken to hospital and kept nil by mouth for 16 hours. They did a CT (or CAT) scan and sent him away with a referral letter for a neurologist mentioning epilepsy. They’d asked him to do blood tests to check his liver and kidney functioning and blood clotting stuff. He refused to do the blood tests or see the neurologist though. He broke down crying as he told me.
I was angry and told him I’d tried to keep him alive while we were together but I’d told him to stop drinking and now within months of me leaving he’s in hospital. He said he knew and had reduced to only drinking at the weekends. Now Im wondering if that reduction triggered a seizure from withdrawal.
I don’t know what to think. Im angry and I want him out of my life but Im worried about his dog. His dog was like my baby and I miss him. Now Im scared my ex could have a seizure or something and the dog could get injured or run into traffic. I’ve also read a little about the dangers of alcohol withdrawal and considering he refuses to get help I’m now considering that my ex might actually die or incur serious injury.
I want him out of my life - I will stay away - but this is a headfuck and I don’t know how to process the emotions.
I’d be grateful if anyone wants to share their thoughts or experience.

Sprive is an app that you can use to overpay your mortgage. I'm not going to get into the ins and outs of overpaying your mortgage. Whether it is right or wrong for you is a deeply personal matter, but if you already overpay your mortgage or you know that you want to in the near future, Sprive is perhaps the app for you.
With Sprive, there are two different ways you can overpay your mortgage:

1. With smart (automatic) savings - set this up to get a £5 bonus, then refer your friends to get more free cash.
2. With cashback from buying gift cards (like Jam Doughnut)

How it works

You link your bank account and your mortgage to Sprive, and it uses some fancy smartsave technology (like Chip) to calculate any extra money you have each month. It squirrels away this extra cash, and you can choose to use this money to overpay your mortgage. You can set limits on the overpayments, pause it at any time, and you can also manually overpay your mortgage too. Or if you decide against overpaying, you can withdraw the money.

I've used it to pay a little off my mortgage many times, and have also had it automatically detect my new mortgage when I had to remortgage in the summer (that hurt).
How to get the bonus £5 (see below for how to get more!)
Only those who have a direct debit set up with Sprive can refer new users. You must also set up a direct debit or deposit £5 to get the bonus.

1. Click the Sprive Referral Link
   
2. Download the app
   
3. Click get started and register using your email address and the referral code:
   

   CCLOM844 (the fourth character is the letter O!)
   

4. Login using the magic link sent to your email
   
5. Link a bank account (via TrueLayer)
   
6. Finish the sign up to link Sprive to your mortgage, and set up a direct debit to collect your autosavings.
   
7. Receive your £5 bonus shortly after your first automated payment or manual payment hits your account.
   

   I signed up when the bonus was only £5. Here's my bonus getting applied after I tested out the app by setting up a direct debit, and sending an additional fiver to pay off my mortgage This nice thing about Sprive is that it doesn't automatically send your savings to your mortgage. You have to actively send the money to your mortgage. But you can also send the money back to your bank if you need it for other things.
   

8. Refer your friends and receive a bonus for each that completes the above.
   

How to use cashback to pay off your mortgage

1 - Buy gift cards for your favourite shops (using TrueLayer for quick payment)
I just tried this, and it's very smooth and quick. Cashback rates are identical to the higher rate on Jam Doughnut.
2 - Instantly Receive your voucher for shopping and your cashback into your Sprive account
3 - Use your voucher for your shopping, and the cashback to overpay your mortgage.

Cashback cannot be withdrawn and must be put towards your mortgage.

Links
Sprive Referral Link - Use code CCLOM844 for the £5 bonus.
Sprive no ref link
Sprive FAQ
Sprive Referral Terms

I filed T2 against the LL in March 2023. We have resolved the issue in June 2023 and i withdrew the T2. May 2024...I received a letter from the LTB - They scheduled a hearing and denied the withdrawal of the T2 because it contained claims harassment. But i have since moved out in June 2023, and the LL sold the property. Shouldn't this hearing be dismissed?

For background knowledge: 3 years ago I met my boyfriend. I had just come out of a super messed up and abusive long term relationship that fucked me up real good mentally. This guy was a narcissistic abusive gaslighter that love bombed and cheated on me- I know….perfect situation for a developing teenage mind. I dated this person until November of grade 12 where he dumped me (thank god) in order to more openly sleep with the entire town. I was a mess and a disaster, while also having to go to school and see this abusive asshole every day. However, this did allow me to witness all the horrible outcomes of a bad relationship and taught me what love isn’t and also how to cope after a breakup. I am an extremely empathetic person, which is probably why I ended up dating someone like that. Now on to the rest…
I started talking to my current boyfriend (well ex now I guess) a month and a bit after my first ever boyfriend broke up with me. We actually met on Tinder of all places, but it was obvious neither of us wanted to be on there. I’m not the hook-up type, have never done it, and met him by chance for the soul reason of my friends making me download it that night. I will be first to admit that I’m a bit odd for a 21 year old girl. I collect antiques and first edition books, grew up playing boys hockey and boys sports, have mostly dude friends just because of similar interests, work on my car, go fishing, and my legs are usually covered in more bruises than not. It was clear when we started talking he liked me a lot. We talked for a month and a half before he could convince my traumatized ass to meet him in person. We hit it off and talked for hours until he had to leave (He lived 3.5 hours away in a different city). He liked how weird I was. I was very clear I was not in any form to be in another relationship. This man waited and waited around until June when I said yes to dating him. Words cannot describe how grateful I am to have met him. He is kind, compassionate, and supportive of everything I had been through. He listened and helped heal something critically broken in me. His presence calmed me and he was like home to me. The distance did not matter one bit and was never even a deciding factor in dating him. We visited eachother whenever we could and things were just fine. I instantly hit it off with his family and frequently visited them with or without him. They are wonderful amazing people.
We both had similar interests, career driven, hiking, love for the outdoors, photography, animals, and it turns out 10 years before, we were at the exact same hotel at the exact same time in another country because both sisters competed in the same sport lol. His gifts are always thoughtful and sweet and well planned out. He was so good to me and taught me how it feels to be truly loved. A year and a half in, his life starts to get more stressful as he’s finishing school and becoming a pilot. No big deal, life can suck. He ends up having to move a 17 hour drive away to a remote community across the country. I was sad, but I knew it would be fine. I visited as much as I could even with a full university courseload. I had to take two separate planes each way to get there, one being sketchy as hell lol. But that didn’t matter, relationships require effort and he came to visit me whenever he could.
He became extremely depressed while he was up there, lost a ton of weight, didn’t smile much, it broke my heart to see him that way. He was more sharp with me now and was struggling, just needing me to be there for him. I cooked him big fatty dinners when I visited and gave him a bit of extra grace. Things started to get really hard. We were fighting a lot more, but it’s hard to resolve deeper issues from so far away. We communicate our feelings very openly though which is good. I just felt like he had lost part of himself, there was no sparkle in his pretty eyes. Periods of good and bad came and went but I couldn’t shake the inner feeling that he was still not ok. But he was trying. We still laughed and made fucked up jokes to eachother and the banter was there. He eventually moved back home close to me after getting a new job. I was so thrilled. We had movie nights, went out and did things, hikes, etc. However, he still seemed off. Things were good for a while. We were happy, and the person that makes me feel like I’m home was in my arms once more. Slowly, he started withdrawing himself from lots of activities we enjoyed. When we argued, he started saying things he didn’t mean. Not things like calling me names or swearing or anything, just kind of petty little jabs like “well you do this”. This just worried me more. It’s hard watching the person you love most suffer. This continued and it seemed like he just couldn’t shake stress and anxiety away which caused him to channel it into our relationship. Over the last year, he has channeled this stress and anxiety into stressing about me. Slowly everything I did wasn’t the right way or I shouldn’t have done it. Don’t get me wrong, we are different, I live my life by doing what I want, being spontaneous, laid back, and letting things play out. He is a bit more structured and likes plans. But this always balanced us out, it worked really well and wasn’t ever really a serious cause of conflict for two whole years…. Until he started channeling his high anxiety onto me. He stopped wanting to do things with me. Because of the anxiety, everything that a normal 21 girl would do became micromanaged and I slowly started to feel like he didn’t even view me as a good person anymore. Even though when I brought it up to him he got sad at the thought of me saying that and would go “I love you so much why would you think that??” If I had one too many drinks the night before and end up hungover then he’s mad at me and I turn into this endlessly reckless person. Don’t get me wrong sometimes I do take it too far, but we are young and are supposed to be having fun? I want to go camping at 4pm and have nothing better to do? Everything I did was critiqued in a way that made me feel like I was being parented. He went away for a month for work training and I excitedly showed up to his apartment and was met with anger, because I just “always show up places unannounced and never have a plan for anything, always late.” I was really taken aback; this was not like him at all. He just totally spiralled out of control when I got there and it hurt me. These are all things he always loved about me, and suddenly it’s all bad? Intimacy declined entirely too. Months on end no making out, compliments, sex, or excitement. It was horrible to see how absorbed he was in his own head that it impacted everything in his life. Then, a low libido from stress will make you feel awful and insecure. And before anyone wonders, this boy has not an unfaithful bone in his body, and from the letters and cards and body language, years of long distance, he loves me a whole lot and would never ever cheat. Hurting me hurt him and made things even worse for him. I am not a quitter, I don’t believe people have one true love they are supposed to meet and that’s it. I think love is something you build with someone worth building it with. I think these days young people have sad views on relationships and love. He wants to change, and acknowledges how much he had changed every time I brought it up, and I don’t think the lack of progress stems from a lack of respect for me, I think he is truly stuck. Then, needing to change would just stress him out again and the circle continued.
So, last week, I made the absolutely heart shattering decision to break up with him as I knew for a fact that he couldn’t figure it out with me being with him. I want him to get better and I felt as if he almost got too comfortable, whether subconsciously or not, with using me as a crutch and having me to be a big part of his cycle. And me being a part regardless of the state he’s in. It was horrible, we just cried in eachothers arms and made (what most would consider) distasteful jokes to get eachother to smile. I want to be with him, I started his wedding present the week we started dating and have been working on it for 3 years through thick and thin (journal entries at least once a week about how much I love him, what we’re up to and can’t wait for that day). I have faith that being alone is what he needs and that he is capable of being the person he once was. He was good about the entire thing and understood why I was doing it. He said he has felt so guilty because he can see how much I’ve been hurting and that he’s taken my spark. It broke my heart to break his. Perhaps losing me will be a wake up call.. Has anyone here ever experienced something like this? Help

My ADHD (hyperactive) soon-to-be husband works a super high demand stressful job and had to work yesterday (his day off, he's salary too and not paid enough to cover overtime) more than his full regular daily hours, and today has to do a whole bunch of work preparing stuff for our wedding. He asked me to do ONE THING. Make lunch. It has been 3.5 hours since he asked, and I have been so completely stuck, trying so hard to reason out what we can have and then periodically breaking down because wtf. How can I spend 3.5 hours not being able to make freaking lunch for the family??!!! And how am I supposed to manage ANYTHING when I can't even make lunch?!
I switched from Vyvanse to biphentin 2 days ago, so I know I'm withdrawing from vyvanse and adjusting to biphentin, I also went almost a week without workouts when I've been doing intense cardio every other day for a while now but couldn't make it work this week due to scheduling out of my control, and this morning I wasn't ready in time to get to my workout class in person so I did it at home but had to clear a space in my kitchen first and missed 1/4 of the workout and didn't push myself as hard as normal cause I wasn't into it, AND I'm supposed to get my period in the next couple days and I get PMDD. I didn't get it with wellbutrin, and didn't seem as bad on vyvanse, but I'm feeling totally defeated and useless right now. So I know those are factors to feeling this way but still...
I don't work, I haven't for 8 years being a stay at home mom, and I can't see how I can possibly manage having a job buy I really need to for money.
I just feel like absolute shit that my man works so freaking hard WITH ADHD, and is able to just function, and I'm so useless. The house is a mess and he doesn't have time to help clean with the demands of his job right now, our wedding is in a month and there's so much left to do and I'm struggling to do much of any of it, and I can't even figure out meals. Or make them.
I was feeling so hopeful about medication, especially after the honeymoon phase of wellbutrin, but even with that and vyvanse I wasn't getting things done. I was getting more focused on the distractions than normal. I just want to be able to function cause I feel like this isn't fair to my man and my kids but I just don't know what to do anymore... it's so unpredictable never knowing when this is going to hit and I'm just useless... and I feel so stupid trying to say that I was trying to make lunch... for 3.5 hours... and just couldn't. It feels like such a cop out and I feel so lazy and hopeless and I don't know how I'm supposed to function in life in any kind of meaningful way if I can't get past this. And now I'm spending time writing this lol. Ugh
I don't even eat breakfast or lunch usually cause it's just too much to figure out what to make and make it for one person every day, on top of figuring out and making dinner, even though my kids are in school and daycare now. And I just make sandwiches for them and my man every day but even that feels really hard a lot of the time. But less hard with wellbutrin and vyvanse.
Don't know what I'm looking for, I just needed to get this off my chest cause I feel like I'm drowning... 😓
Edited to add: we also were supposed to be at my parents house an hour ago to help with wedding stuff there and I needed to shower before going there, but couldn't shower til I figured out lunch so I still haven't done that either. 😓
But I ended up just heating up some canned chicken soup, which was my first thought... 3.5 hours ago. But I wasn't sure if it would be filling enough for him working outside all this time, and I didn't want to do sandwiches cause we need the bread for lunches tomorrow and any of the quick frozen foods we have are either unhealthy and I didn't want to do that, or I feel like I should save for quick dinners during the week when we need them. I just told him I made soup and he said "Oh perfect!" Lol
And here I originally thought I didn't have that severe of ADHD, and never knew I had it at all until like 6 months ago... 🙄

ok i'm a fucking idiot and haven't started choosing schools to apply to, but i would love some advice. (i.e. schools that i might have a better chance with/ how top-heavy my list can be). i took the mcat a month ago and am expecting my score back on the 29th (practice test avg was a 518). 4 letters, really nice letter writers but not expecting anything super insane (2 from profs, 1 from a prof for the class I TA, 1 from research PI).
-3.87 gpa, 3.76 sgpa @ T15 (i'm a junior)
-350 ish clinical hours as an ED scribe (ongoing)
-600 research hours as an RA, doing honors thesis next yr (ongoing)
-240 clinical volunteer hours - 170 at pediatrics dept where i volunteer over breaks (ongoing), 70 at another hospital
-45 hours shadowing (3 neurologists at same hospital)
-100 non-clinical volunteer hours at daycare
-300 hours as a paid chemistry tutor (it's for a school org that provides free tutoring for our student athletes) (ongoing)
-200 hours as a TA for my school's intro bio class (it's an autotutorial class, so there's no lectures. TA office hours are a big aspect of the course, and we also write + administer oral tests for every unit.) (ongoing)
-200 hours for my school's pre-health club (1st year just a member, 2nd yr points director, 3rd yr community service co-chair, will be co-pres next yr. we usually have ~150 members) (ongoing)
-100 hours for my school's science olympiad club as an event supervisor (write + proctor the cell bio/ anatomy tests for competitions) (ongoing)
-other clubs i did my 1st and 2nd year that idk if i'm putting on my app (feminist org, kidney disease awareness + screening club, podcast club)
-10 years playing piano (i do not perform whatsoever)
i'm also a ny resident. would appresh any help/advice, thankyeww

I need help with cancelling and how to go about it. On Monday May 20th i called American Income Life to cancel. The lady said it will take 72 hours for the cancellation form to be sent by email which I have now learned from other posts that's a bs excuse so they don't send it. It is now May 26th and I never received it. As of right now I made sure to send multiple emails especially after emailing customer service on Thursday about never receiving the form. I made sure to tell them if things don't get resolved I will be contacting a lawyer and escalating things further. If they are opened tomorrow on memorial day I will be contacting them and telling them over the phone not only do they need to send me the cancellation letter on the spot. I will also mention to them that phone call is recording, and that they need to stop the automatic withdrawals right then and there. I will also tell them that I will get a lawyer if i see any withdrawals from them moving forward. My mom told me worse case scenario I just open up a new bank account up with my current bank who can transfer over certain things and not them. That will be my last resort. Luckily the only things I have set up automatically with my bank besides AIL monthly withdrawals is direct deposit with my job and my two automatic credit card payments. Any other automatic payments I have are on credit cards. It feels like I have to become a Karen to even get them to do anything. Also contacting an agent is out of the question because you only ever hear from them at most twice before another agent is contacting you. I also learned that AIL is a huge scam and that overall their company is very crappy. I am willing to accept an almost 500 dollar lost just to get them out of my life.