man this is actually really confronting to think abt. hell, i even logged back into this old ass acc because this was the only space that i felt could have some semblance of understanding of how i feel. or maybe not. we'll see :3
thing is, i always prided myself on not having crushes like everyone else my age, and really put myself on a pedestal thinking 'wow, other teenagers are so preoccupied with people they like--thank god i'm only preoccupied with grades!!!' which was probably cause of how i grew up (strict parents, so no dating; also went to a small school so it'd be really awkward)??? it gets to the point where i'm reassured in my identity as an aroace person, and that i'd be perfectly content living out a life that didn't have romantic relationships.
and then i made friends with This One Mf. it wasn't then that this all started, but it was around a year into our friendship when (at the time) he came up to a group of us during lunch, masc haircut and all. so he's a dude, no big deal until you realise that a) catholic all-girls high school and b) i've only been surrounded by homophobic people up until high school
it's not meant to be a big deal (i think, i'm not too sure how this works), but oh my god. idk how many times i've had to re-write this because nothing will ever do justice to the way the world changed when i looked at him. i looked up at him and i just thought to myself 'oh shit he's attractive' and told myself it'd be fleeting and that nothing would change and that i was better than everyone else because i didn't have crushes.
it's been two years. two years, and i keep making this ideal version of him that always knows what's wrong and makes jokes and somehow breaks the physical contact barrier that we both put up around people. he's not even a shitty person, and he's damn observant (as in. stalking profiles and psychoanalysing his friends kind of observant), so i always know that half of what i think of him isn't just stuff rooted in my daydreams and it's eating me up because i always have to worry about whether or not he's catching on.
as i type this, it's the second time that i've gone silent on him. i thought i was doing better???? getting my grades up, being fit, volunteering and achieving in school????? and then i talk to him and suddenly it's all 'i predict that in next year's camp, he'll try to find me while i'm in a field disassociating or whatnot and it's night and he'll immediately know what's wrong and i'll confess and he'll kiss me because he's felt the same all along'. like. he's observant but no he won't care that you're wearing his favourite character's earring. or that you liked an edit on instagram. or that you always turn away and ignore him because you're scared your cheeks are red. i ride the bus, and i think of the singular time we rode a bus together. doing my work, and i suddenly think of all the little moments and texts i've collected over the years and how it means we're written in the stars. i try to sleep, and i imagine him comforting my while i cry or staying up because we both love each other's company when it's just the two of us. i can't fucking think anymore, if not about him.
it's gotten to the point where i've started indulging some of my more disturbing thoughts, trying to pretend that i hate him or that he's into other people or that i've just been lying this whole time. here i am, trying to remove every trace of him in my life until i can gaslight myself into thinking that we've never met. purposefully trying to make him hate me so then i can spot his figure by the bus stop in record time and think 'yeah, it was never gonna happen anyway'.

I recently finished running chapter 5 using the Grimskalle Reimagined supplement from DM's Guild; since it's a relatively recent product and I haven't seen any other reviews, I figured I'd share my experiences with it. My party was level 7, and accompanied by Vellynne. I ran the trials using theatre of the mind, with one small exception. Endurance and Cruelty took a session each to get through, while Isolation and Preservation were done in a single session together.
Starting info: each of the trials is paired with one of the Reghed tribes, who are bound by tradition and duty to proctor it in order to keep Auril appeased.

Endurance

The trial consists of the party being teleported to the base of Kelvin's Cairn with no clothes or gear, and having to make their way up to the peak. It's divided into two basic parts: the forest and the mountain.
This was probably the most mechanically complex trial presented- in the forest, characters had to scramble to make a fire, obtain food, and hunt animals to make clothes from before the cold set in. On the mountain, the characters need to complete a skill challenge to make their way up without guidance or climbing gear, eventually having a scale a sheer cliff to reach the summit. During this ascent, I rolled a wolf encounter as a complication (they failed the first skill challenge, and had to try again). This fight with the wolves was the only part of the trials I needed a battle map for, and I just used a generic snowfield one I had on hand. While at level 7 a pack of wolves would normally be trivial for them, without their weapons, armor, and a bunch of their spells it was actually rather tense for them.
Everyone made it up the cliff in the end and reached the summit, though with exhaustion levels ranging from 2-4 (since most of them failed several times and/or had acquired a few levels of exhaustion during the ascent). My party had only one player with high strength though, so that probably contributed to how much trouble they had with it.
Overall, I really enjoyed running this trial, though it required a lot of pre-reading to make sure I thoroughly understood all the mechanics it was using. The last section also might be trivialized if your party has a character with a flight speed.

Preservation

I did not use the Grimskalle Reimagined version of this trial; I did not feel comfortable describing the content to my group and/or having them roleplay with it. To sum it up: a woman supernaturally becomes pregnant rapidly, gives birth to a daughter and dies in childbirth, and the child then ages rapidly and is herself afflicted with the same curse. This repeats until the party realizes they have to 'preserve' the woman currently experiencing the curse by taking her outside the tent so that she freezes, thus stopping the curse (and killing her).
Pregnancy/birth horror just isn't my cup of tea, so I instead used the alternate Preservation trial from this post.

Isolation

In this trial, the party is sent to a labyrinth of mirrored, icy passageways: I had my players separate into different tunnels and have them go through the trials alone, rather than them all being able to see/hear what the others were going through. The characters were confronted with 3 questions: what they feared most about themselves, what shamed them most, and what brought them the most pride.
This part was where my players took the opportunity to really shine when it came to roleplaying, to the point where I kind of regretted having them split up since they didn't get to see how good the others all were. Part of this, I think, came from me telling them in advance to think about these questions in regards to their characters, so they weren't scrambling on the spot to make answers up.
The characters had to make 3 saving throws, one for each mental stat (intelligence, wisdom, and charisma)- a success got a boon, a failure got a bane (a table of these with examples were provided). I like this concept, but I think some of the boons/banes were far too strong, and ended up making some of my own for my players instead of using what was provided.

Cruelty

In this trial, the players are each tasked with killing three people: a stranger (prisoners of the Tiger tribe, who are administering this trial), an enemy, and a friend. This was another one that was almost entirely roleplay- one religious character rolled religion to try and determine if her god would approve of her choice, but that was about the extent of the dice rolls for this trial. This one was definitely the one that was the hardest on the players and the characters- all of them went through with killing the prisoners and the enemies, but it was about a 50/50 split if they could bring themselves to kill the friendly characters or not.
Both the enemies and the friends that the characters were tasked with killing were NPCs that the players had encountered before during the campaign and had formed emotional connections too, both positive and negative. This did make things tricky for one player though- his character had actually died right before they set off for Solstice, so he'd brought in his new character essentially two sessions before they started the trials. That meant his character's secret (Harper Agent) had to do most of the heavy lifting here, since the character hadn't been around long enough to have any connections with NPCs.

General Thoughts

Overall, I think Grimskalle Reimagined is a good supplement, and I think my players enjoyed its trials a lot more than they would've the vanilla ones. It does require a fair bit of reading ahead of time (particularly the Endurance trial with all its details), and will work best I think with groups that enjoy a lot of roleplaying.

Scriptbin
Note: This script is fine for the recorder to monetize and edit genders or other words. I will only ask for script credit, thank you!
() is for sound effects or actions
\Italics** are for emphasis/tone when speaking
... is for a pause, usually when it's the listener's turn to "reply" to a line.
Summary: You invite your rich best friend to a picnic. She is pretty reluctant at first, but after a moment bonding together, it convinces you to go out with her in an actual relationship.
Script Below:
(Speaker knocks on door)
Open up, it’s me.
(Listener opens door)
What was so important that you couldn’t go to my place? My hou- I mean, my mansion has everything you could possibly need. And don’t give me some silly excuse like your place is “homey” so you prefer it. I’ve heard it all before, and it never makes any sense.
…
You want to bond with me? As in, you’re finally asking me out after all this time? I was worried for some time that you wouldn’t, since most boys are completely head over heels for me. I’m glad you’ve finally succumbed to your urges. So do you have a love letter for me to read or did you already mail it?
…
That look of confusion on your face is quite romantic, too. Oh wait, you’re not confessing to me at all, you’re actually just confused. Forget what I said, then. What do you have me doing here?
…
\mocking laugh** Honestly, I think you’ve finally lost your mind. Why would I go on a picnic with you? That’s so… archaic.
…
Mhm, you’re very traditional. Good for you. But that doesn’t mean you have to rope me into it.
…
Because wealth means that I don’t need to be traditional. I can do whatever I want, however I want. I can take any approach I want and succeed.
…
Well, my approach to bonding would start with it being like… fun? Cooking isn’t fun. It’s some chore that people have been doing since the Stone Age. I prefer sleeping, or reading books, or playing games, or literally anything other than cooking. I believe it’s boring since I have a chef. You’ve met him. Five star meals all the time. Basically anything you can imagine, he can make.
…
Stop talking, you sound ridiculous. It’s food… What could possibly be fun about that? There’s not much to it aside from eating. Setting up a picnic doesn’t sound entertaining at all. It’s beneath me.
…
Getting my hands ‘dirty,’ as you say, is weird to even think about. If I cut my finger in an accident, then I have to begin a lawsuit with the knife manufacturer. I’d win, of course, since my family’s lawyers are always worked to the bone on cases, but it’d be such a hassle.
…
So what if cooking is a life skill? I’m rich, remember? Fine, look. I’ll try my best to assist you with this, but then we’re going to my place. Deal?
…
Good. Now, where do we start?
…
I don’t really know how to make sandwiches… You’re going to have to teach me.
…
It’s not funny, don’t laugh at me. I never learned how to make food. I never needed to learn. If my personal chef isn’t around, those are usually the days I ask to hang out with you. You’re like a pack of rations to me.
…
Wait, I didn’t mean that in a bad way. I meant like… you’re always there when I need you. You’re basically my go-to for anything I might have trouble with. Right now, for example, I’m having trouble making a sandwich, so you’re going to show me how to make one.
…
Okay, let me check the fridge. Hm? What kind of bread is this? This isn’t like the stuff I have at my house.
…
It’s… normal bread? If you say so. What else do we need? Lettuce, tomatoes, meat, and some cheese. Oh, are you going vegan, by the way? I could remove some stuff if you don’t want it. I think I saw some tofu back here.
…
Alright then, so here’s everything we need. It’s actually simpler than I thought to put this together.
…
Wait, can I slice the sandwich? I saw this cooking show in my personal theater the other day, and they always cut their sandwiches in half. It looked more presentable, you know?
…
No, I don’t just watch cooking shows because I’m jealous of their skills. They’re only a little interesting, that’s all. Like, have you ever watched Iron Chef and thought; “hey, this would be fun to make?” That’s how I feel sometimes. I know my chef would make it, but I don’t know, it feels better when you’ve gotten inspired from a show.
…
Hm? I’m not rambling. Not every word I say is nonsense, you should know that better than anyone.
…
Let’s finish up these sandwiches and put them in the picnic basket.
(Brief pause, listener is teaching speaker how to use a knife)
And here it is. Two decent sandwiches, evenly cut. Thanks for teaching me how to use a knife, by the way. I know I don’t say that often, but I really do appreciate your kindness. Sometimes I feel like I should say nicer things to you, but my pride gets in the way.
…
Just because I’m rich doesn’t mean I understand how people feel. I thought that was obvious when you first met me. I was such a moron. I don’t know why I thought I could tease you by flaunting my net worth. But, at least it’s in the past. I’m much more comfortable to be with you now.
…
Anyway, before this gets any more embarrassing for me to talk about, I’m going to put in some snacks and drinks. What else do you think we should add to this basket?
…
I haven’t had fruit salad in a while. Don’t make the whole thing without me though, I want to help.
…
Alright, making a picnic basket is a little fun, I’ll give you that. I thought it’d be far less interesting. I’m a bit impressed with how low-budget this can be, too. I can’t believe picnics can be this cheap to set up.
…
W-well yeah, I know not everything needs to be expensive. Duh. I’m just not used to it being… not expensive at the same time. That doesn’t make me spoiled, by the way. I simply haven’t gotten the time to be as cultured or whatever as you are. I think it’s because you’re really cute, so it helps me learn faster.
…
What’s wrong? I’m just telling you how I feel. I did say that I should start trying to say nicer things to you. You’re cute, so I ended up admitting it!
…
I don’t know why your cheeks are all red, but at least we’re done with the fruit salad. Is it alright if we go to the picnic spot? For once, I don’t feel like calling up my chauffeur. If it’s close, maybe we can walk together.
…
Oh, good, it’s just down the street. You’re carrying the basket, though. I can’t be seen touching such a thing in public.
…
Wait, hold on. Don’t be upset with me. I don’t want to cancel this picnic. I’ll carry it, alright? God…
(Brief pause, listener and speaker are walking)
Out of all the picnic baskets you could buy, why’d you pick this color? It’s so embarrassing. Did you see that old lady call me “princess” on the way here? I feel really awkward for once.
…
Shush. It wasn’t funny. It wasn’t “adorable” either. I feel like I lost some of my confidence.
…
That’s-that’s not a good thing! Please just help me set everything up on the picnic blanket instead of taunting me. Thank you.
…
So… are you happy now? You convinced me to actually hang out here with you. The scenery is a little romantic, and it’s at least up to my standards. \sigh** I’d love to get a boyfriend to see this kind of place with.
…
Mm, finding the right person is hard. They can’t be a complete idiot for starters. They need to be charming, and pretty, and a lot of other stuff. Rich girls like me have a lot of preferences. It'd be great if they were someone like you. It’s so annoying that you’re not into me, though. If you were, I’d be all over you, and this could be a date.
…
Of course I want you. I’d give up every bit of money I had just to be closer to you! What made you think I wasn’t in love? I know sometimes I can give off mixed signals, but I still was hoping that you’d be willing to… court me?
…
If this means you’d give me a chance, then yes. I promise to be a bit more humble from now on. That means more picnic dates like this, right? Or that one time you wanted to go to the museum with me but I declined. I’m up for things like that now. I might like them as much as I enjoyed being out here today.
…
Now, can we go to my mansion? There’s this new film we got for the theater that I’d really love for you to watch with me…

Hello, I did an oral evaluation this morning and noticed this moderately sized red spot.

1. It’s painless
2. I have never had this before
3. I am a 29 year old male
4. I’m not sure how long it’s been there
5. No history of STD’s or random tongue related diseases
6. No other spots on my cheeks, gums, or rest of mouth

https://imgur.com/a/zpjASHj
It doesn’t feel any different than other spots on my tongue, maybe somewhat smoother, but it’s hard to tell.

Hello ,
I live in Japan in an apartment. I recently found two tiny black bugs in my apartment that both left behind a bright red stain after being squished that looks like blood. I spotted them about one to two weeks between sightings.
Google seems to adamantly claim that they’re bedbugs, but I’m not too sure. I’m hoping it’s not an infestation but rather just isolated intruders.
I didn’t see them on or near furniture where people sleep, one I saw on the floor in my living room and the other I saw on my dining room table
I also haven’t noticed any bites that can be bedbugs, just one massive bite on my shin that’s more likely from a spider
Is there anything else they could be ? Perhaps spider beetles or ticks ? Do you have experience with bed bugs in japan or exterminators in japan ?

Business
Ixigo, started in 2007, as a flight comparison website enabled travellers to research and compare relevant price information and book their preferred flight in a cost-efficient and informed manner from OTAs. Ixigo later graduated to OTA( Online Travel Agent) in FY20. Ixigo is the 2nd largest OTA( Online Travel Agent) in terms of revenues, with 6% market share.
They operate through 4 different apps Ixigo flights,Ixigo trains, ConfirmTkt and AbhiBus. Ixigo is the largest Indian train ticket distributor in the OTA rail market with largest market share of around 51%, in terms of rail bookings, among OTAs. Their bus-focused app, AbhiBus, was the second largest bus-ticketing OTA in India, with a 11.5% market share in online bus ticket bookings in FY23. They had a market share in India of about 5.2% of the total airline OTA market by volume in H1 FY24. They have the highest app usage among OTAs with 83 million Monthly Active Users cumulatively across our apps. However, within each of their apps, they integrate and cross-sell all services they operate to ensure that users may not necessarily require another app ,like users can book a flight on the ixigo train app or ConfirmTkt and a bus journey on the ixigo flight app, and a train ticket on the AbhiBus app allowing them to discover and buy multiple travel services.
Product segments
1. Airline ticketing
Ixigo commenced operations in 2007 in the flight vertical by launching a travel meta-search website - providing aggregated comparison of deals and accurate travel information. Later in FY20, they transitioned to an OTA.
2. Rail
They launched the ixigo trains app for android in 2013 as a utility app with the objective of improving the experience of Indian train travellers by allowing them to search for train related information and providing utility services. Subsequently, in 2017, Ixigo started selling train tickets through their Ixigo trains app.
3. Bus tickets
Bus accounts for 70% of transport modes in India. Ixigo sells bus tickets by partnering either directly with operators or source inventory from bus ticketing aggregators in the country.They acquired the business of AbhiBus in 2021 to further consolidate their position.
4. Hotels
In December 2023, Ixigo have launched a hotel booking section on their website and apps to allow users the ability to search, compare and book hotels on their own platforms in India and across the world. They offer properties across domestic and international hotels, spanning budget, mid-range and luxury price points.
90% of users of Ixigo are organic users. Ixigo has market share amongst OTAs in terms of volumes - flight 5.3%, rail 53%, bus 13%. In July 2023,Ixigo became the first OTA in India to launch a Generative AI based travel planning tool named PLAN to help travellers plan their trip, get itineraries and real time information and recommendations based on input criteria.
https://preview.redd.it/cc7d8rv38i5d1.png?width=577&format=png&auto=webp&s=4b668adeeb8b9632de2bdd4683f59d442009f1bc
Industry overview
The Indian travel and tourism market for air, road, air and hotels accounts to around 3,80,800cr, expected to grow at a CAGR of 9%. In the overall Indian Travel market, 54% of all travel spends were made online in FY23, expected to reach around 65% in FY28.
Within the overall budget of ₹ 24 billion allocated to the Ministry of Tourism, a significant portion of ₹ 17.4 billion has been earmarked for the enhancement of tourism infrastructure.
Online penetration is 66-68% which is expected to go to 73-75% in FY27.
OTA (Online Travel Agency) industry in terms of net revenues is 11000cr, expected to grow at 14-15%
B2B OTA is at 4500cr(expected CAGR 14-15%).
In FY23 online penetration of the air segment stood at 70% of all air travel, expected to increase to 80% by FY28. Share of online hotel booking is low at 32%.
The Bus segment is highly underpenetrated by OTAs and represents an increasing segment in terms of volume. Long haul intercity bus services have good revenue margins for players like RedBus, AbhiBus (ixigo bus business), PayTM and RailYatri. For middle market OTAs, this represents the next frontier of growth from Tier- II & III cities and provides the bulk of their top line and growth. Bus along with the air is the fastest growing online travel segment, with a forecasted CAGR for Fiscal 2023 to Fiscal 2028 of 18%
Breakup of the travel industry ( by revenues)
Airline ticketing 44%
Hotel booking 26%
Rail ticketing 16% Bus ticketing 14%
Growth drivers
With per capita income growth, discretionary spends on travel to increase, leading to growth in OTA industry, along with further increase in share of online booking will drive the growth. Convenience of booking with OTAs, making luxury destinations affordable to fit into middle-income consumer budget , workation ( working during travelling)- all these are fostering growth of travel industry.
The surge in affordable smartphone users is expected to reach 1 billion users by 2026, according to TRAI. This, coupled with high speed internet connectivity( launch of 4G/ 5G) will drive online bookings.
The ability of OTAs to offer value added services that offer additional protection and refund guarantees such as zero cancellation fee programmes, fully refundable and flexible ticket types, price protection, travel insurance etc. and their ability to bundle in multiple types of services in one transaction.
A shift in demographics of overall travellers to the age group of 18–35 years who are dominating the Indian travel scene, comprising almost 66% of the overall trips.
Market leader is MakeMyTrip with 24% market share, and other players are Ixigo, Easemytrip, Cleartrip. Ixigo’s market share of the overall OTA market (flights, trains, hotels and buses) by GTV stood at 6% in FY23.
https://preview.redd.it/5lohlijrhi5d1.png?width=738&format=png&auto=webp&s=3f121266147e862945611dcf70df70ec736b9b11
https://preview.redd.it/i3fwx0vvhi5d1.png?width=463&format=png&auto=webp&s=5427dfbb9b7a4a8a933c09de83973e06593b7cb4
Operating metrics
Gross booking revenues is Rs 7450cr (Makemytrip Rs 53790cr). Gross booking revenues is total ticketing values. Revenues for FY23 is 500cr. Contribution margin was 220cr, at 44% in FY23. Though highly fragmented, contribution margin for bus segment is highest at 61.9% Gross take rate is 8.15%.
Comparison of metrics vs FY22, FY21 will not yield correct picture as travel was highly reduced due to covid during those years.
Segment wise revenues (Total revenues 500cr)
Airline ticketing 100cr (20%) Rail 300cr (60%) Bus 100cr (20%)
With the overall improvement of travel and internet infrastructure in India, it is expected that increased travel from / to non-Tier I cities to drive growth in trains, flights, buses and hotel bookings. Transactions booked through Ixigo's OTA platforms involving either origin or destination as non-Tier I cities were 94%.
To gather more tier II customers. Ixigo has run Hindi language outdoor media campaigns at non-Tier I railway stations and target audience in such regions through multilingual digital ads. Their mobile apps are available in multiple regional languages, and have several voice-based features. In FY23, 97.7% transactions are done through the Ixigo apps , rest website. Ixigo's brand presence and loyalty amongst users is evident from the growth in Monthly Active Users, which has increased from 21.59 million in March 2021 to 62.83 million in March 2023. They had a repeat transaction rate of 85% in FY23. Ixigo took 9 hrs to process a complaint, a total of 191576 complaints received in FY23.
90% traffic to Ixigo is organic. Ixigo operates through house of brands approach like Makemytrip. Ads & sales promotion expenses stand at 18.6% of revenues.
https://preview.redd.it/2k5dnhb2ii5d1.png?width=793&format=png&auto=webp&s=986e64cc2f7ebc215bdf5d19e0d25cb1d08f0efc
Financials
Annual revenues of Ixigo is 500cr. PAT 23cr.Revenues for 9M FY24 is 490cr and PAT for 9M FY24 is 65cr.
Take rates ( Operating revenues/ Gross booking revenues) of Ixigo is 8.15% (Yatra Online 5.7%, Makemytrip 9.1%, Easemytrip 6%)
EBITDA margins 8.7% (Yatra 17.6%, Makemytrip 10.2%) PAT margins 4.6% (Yatra 2%, Makemytrip is loss making Rs 90cr loss)
Balance sheet as on Dec '23
Borrowing at 43cr ( short term)Current debt/ equity ratio at 0.01
Trade receivables 33 cr.Cash equivalent of 52 cr. Cashflow from operations 30cr for FY23.
Points to consider
Market leader Makemytrip is still loss making, despite having 24% market share and 10 times revenues of Ixigo, indicating there is significant cash burn involved in terms of customer inducement/ customer acquisition cost which is 39% of revenues for Makemytrip.
Hotel & package booking is higher margin business, but Ixigo has just entered the segment in Dec '23.
Ixigo has a good hold in bus segment , which is still underpenetrated, and has higher take rates and contribution margin.
Transactions booked through Ixigo's OTA platforms involving either origin or destination as non-Tier I cities were 94%. Most of the future growth will come from non- Tier I cities, which places Ixigo in favourable spot. Given the growth drivers discussed , OTA industry is expected to grow at 14-15% CAGR.
IPO size /Promoter holding/ Market cap
Total offer ~ 720cr Fresh issue 120cr OFS 600 cr OFS sellers are SAIF Partners India IV Ltd , Peak XV Partners Investments V, others.
QIB- 75% NII 15% Retail 10% Funds raised from anchor investors is 333cr.
Price band- 88-93 Market cap post listing ~ 3635cr
Purpose of IPO
to fund working capital 45cr Technology & data science 26cr rest amount to fund inorganic growth
Valuation
Ixigo is valued at P/E of 56 and P/S of 7x. Yatra online is valued at P/E of 267, and P/S of 4.8x, whereas similar sized listed peer Easemytrip is at P/E of 48, P/S of 12.5x

Hello my red faced friends, I was given a script for metrogel about a month ago and while it’s been helpful, I’m having difficulty acclimating to it when I follow someone’s instructions (not on the prescription leaflet but apparently from this sub people put it on then wait 20 minutes before putting anything else on- I heard the same thing about tretinoin when I started it 10+ years ago, which I couldn’t do because it was too drying and it worked the same whether I waited 20 min or even mixing it with lotion at the same time)
Does anyone wait less time after putting metrogel on before putting your next layer of skincare product (maybe 5 min or so?) to curb irritation from it? Does it make a difference in effectiveness? For tretinoin it doesn’t (it works regardless and less side effects)
Also, do you put it all over your face or just the spot areas where you need it? (Mostly cheek and nose area for me).
Thanks!

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It had been a few weeks since Altier was brought to the run-down shack that his black-scaled companion likely called home, and he could now comfortably say he was accustomed to the…household’s routine. The kobold typically left at the crack of dawn, returned a little after noon, and occasionally left again to forage until nightfall. When the weather was bad or there wasn’t a particular need for something, they half-heartedly chased their rabbit around for a bit, which usually ended with a bout of quiet petting while everyone got ready for the night. It was always amusing to see the energetic side of what he had come to know as a relatively lazy loaf of an animal. As for the routine of the ferrorabbit in question… Well…it was at least more interesting than expected.
Hoppit would begin his own series of activities as soon as his caretaker left—the first of which being a check of every nook and cranny in the shed. He sniffed at anything that caught his interest, varying from morning to morning, but he gave every object or corner its due attention. Once he was satisfied with that, he would eat some of the ragged plants that made up most of his diet, take a drink from his bowl, then jump onto the tro— table and plop himself down, his ears pivoting towards the door. It was hard to say if the lounging spot had been established before Altier’s arrival, but it was somewhat amusing to pretend that the little rabbit was standing guard over his core—if it wasn’t for one particular part of the morning ritual, that is.
Indeed, the ferrorabbit had a habit of licking the obsidian orb that sat in the middle of the room, which thankfully didn’t seem to perturb the system enough to give Altier a headache. He was confused when it first happened, but it was commonplace enough now that he barely acknowledged it. A part of him liked that he was getting attention as a core, even if it was delivered via a strange grooming method. The closest he got to being acknowledged as something other than ‘the dungeon’ was through an unfortunate misunderstanding that he could never properly rectify. He supposed that was hardly worth thinking about now, though; too much time had passed for there to be anyone left to correct. The little oddity of his mornings would have to suffice.
There wasn’t much to comment on as far as the rest of the day’s happenings. Hoppit would end his loafing by shaking his head and ears in a way that filled the silence with soft clacks, give the core a customary tongue bath, then jump off the table to nose his way out of the shed through a hole that was hidden by the storage cart against the wall. Where the rabbit went was anyone’s guess, but he always returned before anyone noticed he was gone, and often did so while covered in small cuts and scratches. Any blood from the lacerations was quickly licked off before it could be seen by the kobold, and in the event that the scaly caretaker happened to return earlier than expected, Hoppit would scurry over to the bundles of blankets to finish the cleanup in secret.
Today looked to be following the usual pattern. The kobold left bright and early with various gardening tools and a wooden pail, and Hoppit had since set off into the great unknown for one reason or another. Hopefully, he returned less injured than usual. It was frustrating to admit that Altier had begun to grow rather fond of the fluffy creature, and seeing the thing come back hurt was bothersome. Was it off looking for food? There wasn’t a whole lot given to it, so that was a possibility, and it could be getting into fights over whatever it found. That still didn’t explain why the animal was so thin, and Altier didn’t have enough to go off of to think of a potential solution. He wanted to help it in some way, like by summoning a creature to act as an escort, or maybe just by manifesting something edible like he once could. No, he could only stare at the ‘Synchronizing…’ that occupied his menu, wishing he had more information to work with.
He never thought he would miss the bombardment of notifications and their lingering presence that filled the edge of his mental vision; at least with that he could surmise enough to hazard some kind of action. Even knowing why the menu was acting the way it did would be a start. Yet, try as he might, there wasn’t a history for him to reference anymore, and he had nothing to work with. He was confident the last message had asked him to ‘accept’ something, then took his befuddled ponderance as an answer, but he was no closer to an explanation for what it wanted, nor why it prompted him in the first place. He just didn’t have another experience to compare against, since nothing like that had ever happened before. Not that he was ever in much of a position to allow it.
The entire purpose of having Altier inhabit a core was for him to become a dungeon of Decay, which entailed all the skeletons, poisons, acids, and whatever else came to mind when one pictured the concept. ‘Living’ creatures were something he only had the chance to experiment with near the beginning of his new existence, though he never dabbled past the first few insects before transitioning to the mindless undead. Having a thinking, feeling, breathing entity touch his core was a rite reserved only for the adventurers and soldiers that bested his trials, and that was usually a painful experience. Now, he had spent what he could only guess was hours being held by a kobold, followed by having a rabbit bump against him, and neither felt like what he came to expect. Instead, both had led to a completely novel reaction from the system. The strange circumstances put him at a bit of a loss as to what it all meant for him.
Sure, he could dismiss the deluge of errors from his companion’s involvement by pointing to the numerous ‘corrupted’ messages before it, and Hoppit was a part of mostly unexplored territory, but the lack of clarity nagged at the back of his mind constantly. Being exposed to activity after potential decades or centuries of unchanging solitude made him despise the informational dead end. If he couldn’t make sense of the rabbit’s circumstances, then he didn’t have much hope of deciphering the reason for why his system was misbehaving so terribly. He also didn't know much about the one who owned the decrepit holdings he was housed inside.
He still wasn’t sure what drove the kobold to take him from the cave. His suspicion of becoming traded goods fell flat after the first week or so, and he hadn’t noticed any cult-like behaviour, which was promising. Granted, a lack of nefarious behaviour didn’t mean there was a lack of nefarious intent, but he didn’t get the impression his companion held that either. The kobold itself didn’t seem quite settled on an opinion of his core, though it was up for debate if the hesitation was due to knowing what he was or not. They seemed to mull something over before bed each night, yet never reached a satisfactory conclusion, staring at the obsidian orb through weary grey eyes until they eventually forced themselves into sleep.
Whatever the underlying reasoning for his abduction was, he had observed enough to know that the kobold didn’t deserve to live in destitution. As beaten as the shed might be, they cared for it as best they could, and did so without a single groan or grimace of complaint. The floors were cleaned with a tattered rag and fresh water, dust was removed regularly, and any stray mess that Hoppit made was dealt with promptly. They even took the time to wipe off his core, which was possibly where the ferrorabbit got the idea to start licking him. The only time Altier had seen discontent from the kobold was when they didn’t find much during their foraging, and thus couldn’t give any treats to the excited and bouncy herbivore.
He wasn’t aware that a creature’s face could make such a painfully broken expression, and he was quick to decide that he never wanted to see it again.
Vexingly, his metaphorical hands were tied; a dungeon could only influence their Domain, and given the state of his system, not even that option was available to him. All he could do was glare at the rotting wooden beams that held up the roof and remember when such an issue didn’t exist. It would have taken a mere flicker of thought and a paltry sum of mana to mend the struts when he was a proper dungeon. He could even outright reinforce the structure by weaving in other materials, leaving the appearance as it was while making everything stronger than iron. Well, he once could. Working with other affinities was something that came to him after absorbing the coloured motes left behind by adventurers, and the accursed stone that stole his mana had taken that ability as well.
An attempt was made anyway, his will ordering the deteriorated wood to absorb any trace metals from the ground, but it was no use. He couldn’t feel the iron or stones beneath the shed like he would have been able to before, all but confirming his suspicion that his connection to the Earth element had slipped away. Nature was much the same; the only way he knew when Hoppit had returned most days was from the subtle noise and the essence of injury. The other attributes—Air, Flame, Luma, Shadow, and so on—were ones he never experimented with to any real extent, so it was less noticeable when he lost his grasp on them. Perhaps they faded early. Either way, all he had left was a waning cognizance of his own alignment, and that wasn’t of much use to him. If he had any appreciable mana income, then perhaps he could do something, but he wasn’t even sure what the upkeep of his current Domain might be. It was entirely possible that he was running on a deficit, which would offer a reason for why his system had been so—
[Do#$@n Ex@#d$%^&d! CRe@#r H-H-H-HoPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP—]
[Errrrrrr—]
[Sy$%^hroni%^$zing…]
[Creeee-tu— Hoppit ha@$ esttttb-hed terrrrrrr-ity f^#% t$e dun@&$n!]
- - - - -
“Well then,” he mumbled to himself, taking in the strange scene behind the shed. For one, he could actually view a small distance beyond the structure now, and two, there was a rather proud-looking Hoppit sitting on his haunches before a pair of significantly less prideful examples of the species. They looked quite a bit bigger than the lazy loaf Altier had come to know, yet they were more cut up and dejected than his furry friend. That answered where the injuries had been coming from, he supposed. Hoppit was probably running off to bash heads with whatever animal population existed here beforehand, and they had only just reached a consensus on who was in charge. Impressive.
One of Hoppit’s ears turned back towards the shed, his head following suit as he gave a lagomorph’s approximation of a ‘Look what I did!’ smile. Altier blanked out mentally, but didn’t have time to question anything before the new leader of the local rabbits imperiously pointed a paw towards the surrounding forest, which was equally surreal to witness. Most surprising of all, the…subordinates? The other ferrorabbits did as commanded, keeping their forms small as they took off into the foliage. Soft clacks came from Hoppit’s pleased shake of his head, then he too left the area with only a slightly lopsided bounce to his stride.
The man-turned-core could only gape at what he saw. Were animals always so…expressive? Had Hoppit heard him? What in the world was happening? Why had Hoppit’s personal conquest led to Altier’s Domain expanding?
He lamented not having fingers, nor temples to rub with them. His system was a garbled mess of errors and inconsistent messages, his residence was falling apart at the seams, his companion was someone who abducted him from the dungeon, yet never did anything past that, and his first real experience with an animal was turning out to be more confusing than he thought possible.
All of this was after an unknown amount of time spent commanding legions of undead to strengthen the very people who he would later learn had lied to and manipulated him, making him into a nightmarish entity just to bolster the power of their forces. He almost missed the days spent gazing out of a mossy window. At least then he knew what to expect.
Nothing made sense anymore.
= = = = =
The soft sound of roots ripping free from soil suddenly stopped, only to be followed by a dull thud of Ceele’s palm slapping against the ground to catch her fall before she landed on her rear. She righted herself with her tail and tossed the stubborn weed into a pile with the others. No matter how many mornings she did this, they always seemed to replace themselves faster than she could remove the pesky things. A sigh slipped from her muzzle as she set about grabbing the next one embedded in the vegetable garden.
Aches and spreading stiffness flared up, but went ignored as she neared the end of her duties, though she was well aware that they would come back with force once she tried to settle down for the day. The impending soreness was an inevitable byproduct of spending so much time working. Still, she knew that if it wasn’t for the kindly old couple that allowed her to call their shed home, she would still be sleeping beneath the stars while making sure nothing tried to get at her Hoppit. Even if it was just a part of the deal, they were owed this much in return, and she would see it done properly.
The sun bore down on her back as she did her usual tasks, which was a departure from the slightly overcast weather as of late. It looked somewhat promising when she checked in the wee hours of the morning, yet as her gardening duties dragged on, so too did the intensity of such a clear sky. A disappointed glance at the empty wooden bucket on the edge of the field was quickly corrected. She hadn’t thought to refill it at the river after watering the crops, and her parched throat was making its protests known, while also reminding her that there wasn’t much water left at home either. One more thing to take care of when she was done.
A gruff cough brought her attention towards the old kobold resting his back against a tree some distance away, safely shaded from the unforgiving rays beaming down. Her displeasure at having yet more to do was hastily wiped away. She was undecided on what to think of the detached audience, but looking so sour while upholding her side of the agreement wouldn’t reflect well on her. Hopefully, he hadn’t seen it. Not that she could tell if he did; he always had the same expression when he watched her work. The elder kobold’s arms were crossed, a finger tapping absently against his bicep, while his tail sat motionless on the grass, the muddy red colour of his scales standing out amongst the greens and browns. ‘Makis,’ was his name, assuming her memory served.
Makis had taken to observing her every so often, usually propping himself against this or that at a distance, the unwavering scowl being as unnerving as it was belying of his age. Somewhat loose skin sagged a bit around his jowls and neck, yet the rest of his face was still taut from how much time he spent examining red-hot metal, and his arms were marred with countless burns and cuts from his profession. He held an oppressive aura, though the crinkles around his eyes and muzzle suggested he smiled as frequently as he glowered, even if Ceele was yet to see the former. There was only the same judgmental expression aimed at her when he was around. She could only hope that he didn’t take offence to some unintended slight, but she didn’t know him well enough to say what might be considered one.
They hadn’t spoken since she took up residence on the outskirts of his land. His wife was the one to introduce them, but it was quickly established that he had no intention of being a chatty individual. He led Ceele to the shed hidden amongst the trees on the edge of the property, then dismissed her with only a grunt coming from the elderly kobold. She supposed that it was for the best. Her experience in socializing was centred around convincing others to employ her, and there hadn’t been much of an opportunity to expand her horizons while living a life on the road. If that had been the end of their interactions, she would have swiftly written the terseness off, but he appeared every few days, taking up residence beneath the shade as he watched her work, never speaking a single word. At least he didn’t openly protest her presence, yet she figured that would be easier to manage. He wouldn’t be such an enigma then.
There wasn’t a whole lot she knew about him besides his penchant for ‘supervision,’ and anything beyond that was what his wife had volunteered during the rare opportunity they had to chat. She was told that Makis worked the smithy out front, and although he had retired from doing so in an official capacity, she could still regularly hear his hammer as she tended to the garden, so she figured he kept himself busy most days. It made her wonder what was so interesting about a vagrant like herself, but when there was so little else to do, she could see how anything could be made worth the attention. It was just him and his wife living in the once bustling home, after all; the couple’s children had long since grown up and made families of their own.
She noticed his gaze shift elsewhere as she tugged yet another stubborn intruder from the soil, his arms falling from across his chest and the perpetually worn displeasure melting to that of curiosity. He wandered off shortly after, and she had to make an effort not to fall onto her tail as the pressure on her shoulders unexpectedly evaporated. Did something happen?
Ceele shook her head free of the distracting thought. It wasn’t her business if he grew bored with watching her work. As long as no one voiced any complaints, she could only assume that she was doing a satisfactory job. Maybe he finally decided that he didn’t need to be so watchful because she was doing well! That could be it, right?
A glance at the somewhat sloppily maintained garden erased the false confidence from her face, but she was just as quick to focus on finishing up, unwilling to allow darker musings to fester. Thankfully, there didn’t seem to be anything else that needed her intervention. The weeds were all uprooted, the soil was appropriately dampened, and her check for pesky insects or wildlife turned up nothing to worry about. She was free for the rest of the day!
…Or she would be free—as soon as she finished the last of her tasks, anyway.
The black-scaled kobold got up from her crouch unsteadily, shivering and wincing from the pins and needles in her legs. She would have to remember to stretch more often; it was far too easy to forgo that kind of thing just to make the overall work go slightly faster. Her hand reached out to grab the pile of weeds and put them into the bucket as she ran through what needed to be done before she could properly relax. Hoppit’s food needed to be washed, she needed to bathe, and they were running low on water anyway, so she would have to visit the river. Just the thought of dragging herself into the forest again made her muscles protest, but she wouldn’t have the energy to do it later. She forced the smile that had started to fall and took the first of many steps.
- - - - -
The river wasn’t too far away, only taking a few minutes of traipsing through the dense woodlands until she reached her destination. It was an idyllic little spot. The trees thinned out to allow a grassy bank along the water, and there was an appreciably gentle slope from shallows to depths, making for a convenient place to take care of various needs. She had discovered this place during her travels, and it was where a kind older woman found her.
Ceele was washing off at the time, with Hoppit safely taking shelter from the outside underneath the bundled blankets while he waited. The trickle of the stream brushing against rocks covered the sound of footsteps, so she was rather surprised when an aged voice called out to ask if she was okay. Her first reaction was to distance herself and apologize—the why didn’t matter, but she had learned that most people were more lenient of her presence if she seemed apologetic for it, and she usually was. The elderly kobold just laughed at her scrambling, tacking on an assurance that there was no need for modesty. The woman was blind, apparently, which explained how Ceele’s blackened colours hadn’t deterred her.
Strangely enough, there was a comforting sense of ease around the one who introduced herself as Hira. It was a sort of presence that Ceele could only vaguely remember, and it drew her close enough to speak as she finished bathing. The conversation wasn’t anything profound, of course—they hardly delved deeper than surface-level small talk—but Hira lost her smile as she listened to the younger kobold. By the end of it, the old woman posed a series of questions with a dark inflection to her voice, and Ceele struggled to find an answer.
‘Are you tired of looking for something that only slips away? Are you tired of running? Do you really want to be scared and alone?’
If the silence bothered Hira, then it didn’t show. She had simply held out a hand and offered Ceele a way of life that didn’t involve wondering where she would be spending the night, nor entailed cowering in the brush while fearsome predators roamed freely. It would be a simple existence of few fortunes, but it was safe, and it was honest. All she had to do was say yes.
Ceele denied it at first, partially because she knew most people despised Hobbit's species, and partially because she couldn’t shake the offer being too good to be true. Hira was quick to propose a compromise; Ceele could take residence in the gardening shed that had fallen from use, and to satiate the nagging sense of an unfair deal, she would be put in charge of maintaining the garden itself. All Hira wanted was to ‘see’ her favourite space bloom again, since she couldn’t take care of it anymore. The black-scaled kobold stared longingly at where Hoppit was, his little body shivering from the prolonged cold and fear that he would be hurt if he left the blankets hiding him. It was with a heavy guilt that she accepted Hira’s offer, keeping quiet about her true reason for doing so.
That was in the past, however, though she thought about it every time she stopped by and saw the smooth rocks where she and Hira first met. Eventually, she might gather the courage to admit that she was housing a ‘pest’ and beg for forgiveness. Until then, she would just work her hardest to prove it wasn’t a mistake to give her a home. That her endless efforts weren’t meaningless. That Hoppit deserved to be more than a ‘pest.’
That Ceele was more than something she had no control over being.
She cleared her head a bit and started on the reason she came all this way. Her dress was rather easy to wash in the meandering water, and the trees provided a suitable place for it to dry in the sunlight and light breeze. The weeds were fine with a thorough rinse near in the shallows, but taking care of her own hygiene required her to wade farther in, though it only came up to her chest in the middle of the rill. Still, she could scrub off the soil and grime, which was all she really needed. Perhaps some simple soaps would help rid her of the pervasive black that stained her skin and scales, but that was beyond her meagre means for the time being, as well as being mere wishful thinking.
She worked past the dreary mindset that settled in when she allowed it, focusing on how serene the river was. The soft birdsong from the trees helped make for a peaceful experience, and she could feel the somewhat chilled liquid basically pour into the aches and pains throughout her body, washing away the stiffness from spending so long under the unerring sun. It was nice to escape reality and let thoughts drift while held buoyant by calmer waters.
Yet the bliss was short-lived. Even if winter was gone, spring was still far from warming the waters enough for her to laze about for too long. She dragged herself from the soft current and fetched her dress from the low-lying branch she left it to dry on. It was still a touch damp, but it wasn’t anything a bit of time in front of the fireplace wouldn’t fix.
Ceele was only a short distance away from home when she heard a gravelly male voice, but it was the flicker of sight between the trees that made her drop what was in her arms and lunge into a sprint.
Makis stood just outside the gardening shed, a ferrorabbit held at arm’s length by rusty crimson hands placed on the scruff and haunch, the rabbit’s little ears flattened as fear filled its tiny face. Her eyes widened further when she noticed the small stains of blood in his light brown fur. They found out about him. Ephemeral claws of blackness clutched at her soul, ripping the very fabric she was made of as an unseen beast smiled, eager to take yet one more thing from her. Her Hoppit. Her baby. Her everything.
“Hoppit!” she shrieked, her words all but tearing out of her throat in desperation. Frozen blood coursed through her veins, yet poured into exhausted limbs. She broke through the treeline with no regard for the branches slashing against her flesh, panic making each sting fade before it could be processed. The grizzled glare of the older kobold snapped towards her, his usual scowl picking up an actual air of intensity that she never thought could be absent, the promise of violence lurking in his eyes. She skidded to a stop a few paces away, the lump in her throat threatening to clog her airway. “S-stop hurting him!”
“Didn’t,” he barked back, his tone even yet firm. “Cuts ain’t me. I’d’a done worse if’a had ta mind ta.”
The blatant declaration snapped her from blind panic, although his apparent anger didn’t do her fear any favours. “B-but… Then how…”
“‘Hoppit.’ Named it, did’cha?” he grunted, ignoring her confusion and bobbing the rabbit to get her attention again. His gaze shifted back to the animal, the flames of ire cooling slightly. “I was wonderin’ why yer plots ain’t dead yet. Suppose this critter’s why.”
One of her hands hesitantly reached out until she pulled it back, while the other clutched at her chest to stop her heart from hammering against her ribs. She couldn’t act rashly. Not while her baby was in his arms. “I—”
“Soft thing, ain’t it,” the elder kobold commented curiously, cutting her off.
“Y-yes?” she returned reluctantly, struggling to stop herself from lashing out to reclaim the ferrorabbit in his grasp.
“Like fine silk.” Makis tipped and tilted the animal, inspecting this and that with a deep-seated frown, all while Hoppit silently looked to her for help. The pit in her stomach grew. She needed to get him back, but how?
Ceele swallowed the dense dread as she tried to formulate some sort of plan, stumbling over her words and forced smile. “I-it’s nice! Isn’t it nice?”
His eyes snapped back to burrow into her own with hatred. “Wasn’t a compliment, girly.”
“B-but you—”
He released Hoppit’s lower half to jab a claw at the various spikes around his body, plying them with minimal force. “Look. See this? These’r suppose ta break bone. ‘Specially when he’s stiff like this. Ain’t no way I should be able ta bend ‘em. He’s barely more than a walkin’ carcass—all skin ‘n stick. He’s gonna get picked up by a wandering pecker if he keeps pissin’ about out ‘ere. It’s a wonder he’s still kickin’. What’cha feeding ‘em?” His gaze dropped from her face to the rest of her, disgust curling his muzzle into a snarl. “N’ver mind. I can guess.”
She felt the dampness build at the edges of her vision, unprepared to not only worry for Hoppit's immediate health, but also to face such harsh criticism while she was so vulnerable. “I… I try to make sure he has…”
Makis crouched to release the ferrorabbit onto the ground, Ceele dropping to her knees the moment he did. The terrified lagomorph wasted no time, bolting towards his adoptive mother and leaping into her arms, shaking uncontrollably. The rust-coloured ‘bold stared as she started soothingly stroking the animal’s back.
“Yer given’ em the weeds, aren’t ya?” he stated rather than asked. She gave a teary nod when her voice wouldn’t respond for her. The old kobold drew a breath, letting it go in an exasperated sigh as he stood back up, his expression becoming more impatient than antagonistic. “What else?”
“I— Um…”
“What. Else?”
“W-whatever I c-can find!” she sputtered out. Hoppit tried to hide against her neck, prompting her to tighten her hold. She couldn’t stop herself from shrinking, the guilt and confusion pulling her head down. “R-roots, vegetables, fruits… I give them as often as I can.”
His glare continued unimpeded, his cadence cold. “That it?”
There were a million things Ceele wanted to say. A part of her wanted to beg him not to kick them out of the first safe place she had in longer than she could remember, but she couldn’t find the words. She wanted to deny the judgmental tone that stabbed into her insecurity surrounding how good of a job she was doing with Hoppit, but the deadened void in her chest swallowed her pride whole. She knew he was right to critique her. That she was failing in the only thing that mattered anymore. That the feeling of loss would return.
“I try,” she whispered through the beginnings of a sob. “I try to find more, but he needs someone around, and I have to work the garden, so there’s only so much time I can spend looking. He won’t even eat all of what I bring back…” Tears dripped off her cheeks as she aimed a desolate smile at her furry friend. “He wants to make sure I have some too.”
“Yer killin’ em,” Makis pointed out plainly, crossing his arms. “He’ll be dead ‘fore the summer at this rate.”
“I know!” she shouted, forcing back the memories of insidious murmurs that lurked in the back of her mind, eager to creep into her ears again. The hate-filled stares that followed her, the rumours that arrived in towns before she had the chance to make an impression, and the guilt that loomed over her like an executioner's axe… “I know I am… I just… I don’t know what he needs. I don’t know how to make him happy…but I try. I’m trying…”
“…Yer an idiot, girly.”
She looked up to see the elder kobold walking away without another word. Her eyes fell to Hoppit, the ferrorabbit pressing himself against her as much as he could. He was small, thin, soft, and growing weaker by the day, but he never let it keep him down for long. No, he always showed his best for her, giving her joy that wasn’t provided anywhere else. She saw the thin cuts and dried blood, though she didn’t know where they came from, nor how he got out of the shed in the first place. But that was okay. Hoppit was okay, and she had Hoppit, so everything was okay, right?
…But how much longer would everything stay okay? How much longer until her efforts weren’t enough, and she was left desperately reaching for fading memories of what once was? How much longer until she killed her baby too?
How much longer until she was alone again?
Soft footsteps drew near, pulling her from the spiralling thoughts that threatened to gnaw at her soul. Damp, blurry eyes fell on Makis returning with a small wooden crate, the older kobold stopping a few steps away. He dropped the box, a deep, rattling thud produced as it impacted the ground, making Hoppit flinch in her arms. Ceele blinked as she kept him calm, then blinked again, looking up at the man for answers.
“The name, girly,” he spat in irritation. “Ferrorabbit. Ther’ Earth aligned creatures; they need metals. They don’t care where they get it, but they need lots of it. Iron, copper, tin, lead—raw crystal, if they can find it. You name it, they’ll take a chunk out of it. It's why they bother farmers so much; the best soil’s usually top’a gem deposits, ‘n the little bastards have no issue burrowing deep to get it. Dries up the element’s energy ‘n makes the crops weak.”
Ceele’s mouth opened and closed, each unsuccessful attempt to speak making her feel smaller and smaller. More and more lost. Why was he telling her this? How did he know? What was in the—
He kicked the crate with the side of his foot. “Scraps. Don’t’cha look at me like that. I’m a smith, girly. I might be old and retired, but I still work a forge. Now, this ain’t anything pure—it’s just slag and hunks—but I’m sure the critter won’t mind. Your little gardenin’ project pays off, ‘n I’ll see which of my contacts can get in some better ore.”
She ripped her eyes away from the box and met the perpetual scowl of the old kobold, seeing a warmth behind the hostility that she had never noticed before. “…Why?”
He scoffed in amusement, which looked somewhat menacing on such a hardened expression. “Yer a touch stupid, girly, but the missus adores ya, ‘n yer a good worker.” A shadow of a smile formed on his face. “Hira spent more evenings asking ‘bout how the plots are doin’ than I got time in the day. She’d bite my head off if I noticed a critter like that sufferin’ and didn’t lend a hand. ‘Specially when it’s obvious you ain’t tryin’ ta hurt the thing.”
“B-but the garden… Isn’t he a problem?”
Makis rolled his eyes, turning with a dismissive wave of his hand. “If he was, he’da killed it by now. I’d say he’s been keepin’ the others clear ‘n got scratched up for the trouble. That’s more reason to feed ‘em right in my eyes; pay the poor bastard his dues.” He paused after a few steps, shooting her one last incredulous glance. “‘N the rabbit’s right. You’re not much better off than he is. Eat. Before the missus takes my head, preferably. I ain’t need ta hear her worryin’ over you more than I already do.”
And with that, he walked off back to the house, leaving Ceele to sit stunned on the ground with Hoppit quietly nuzzling into her.
“Hoppit…?”
The ferrorabbit perked an ear and gently licked her collar. Fresh tears ran rivulets down her face, yet they didn’t weigh her down. They felt freeing. She adjusted her hold on the rabbit and held him out, taking in the small cuts and numerous other injuries she had never noticed before. He stared back at her with worried eyes.
“You’ve been busy, huh?” she cooed quietly, doing her best to keep her voice from cracking. He shrunk in her hands. “I told you to stay home, baby. What if something happened to you? I wouldn’t know where you went, and…”
Her protests died out as she saw what was unmistakably guilt on his little face. She brought him back to her chest and cleared her throat.
“It’s alright, Hoppit. If… If you want to help momma, then we can work together, okay? Just…please don’t go off getting hurt… I don’t know what I’d do without you…” The rabbit didn’t reply, and she was pretty sure she had never heard him make any sounds that weren’t his happy little ear clacks, but she chose to interpret the nuzzling as an agreement. “Such a smart boy…”
She took a breath and wiped off the excess moisture from her cheeks, setting Hoppit down on the ground. “Let’s bring Mr. Makis’ gift in, and then I need to go get more water so we can clean you up, okay?”
He bounced his way to the door of their home, waiting patiently for her to lug the surprisingly heavy crate into the shed. He was even still behaving himself by the time she returned from picking up the things she dropped in her haste. There wasn’t a single protest from the ferrorabbit as she washed over his wounds with warm water, nor when she asked him to wait as she cut up a small salad for him using an extra portion of her rationed vegetables. Finally, once everything else was gone, she tentatively sifted through the box until she found a chunk of something that didn’t look so sharp, then offered it to Hoppit skeptically.
As startling as it was to see him bite through metal without issue, she couldn’t help but tear up again at how pleased he looked with the bizarre addition to his diet. He munched through the first piece, then stared at the box while pawing at the air, asking for more. She obliged through wet laughs, feeling lighter than she had since he first gazed at her from his burrow, alone and afraid, just like she was.
Her little baby was happy, and that made it okay.
Next
—
A/N: Thank you to my Patrons, new and returning! No Thanks, Emmanuel, and Megathor join the others who get to read 1 chap ahead!

Recently I had sex with a girl who I know pretty well, and was tested for STD's (not herpes b/c she had no sores) and we used a condom for most of the interaction, except for the first 10 seconds. About mid way through, she complained of soreness and we discovered she had just started her period, and stopped. About 5 days later, i had intense itching in my groin, down my legs, and my buttocks. I began to get worried, and then began to get a soreness at the tip of the penis, with redness. She started having symptoms 2 days later, similar itching and burning. Neither of us had any blisters, and were both diagnosed with yeast infections. I did notice 3 peculiar paper cut like "scratches" on my inner thigh, about 6 inches down, each 1 inch in length. They were slightly itchy, but the pain was in the penis post-itchiness so i did not think much of it, and was told by my doctor, and a STD specialist that if it was herpes, id have blisters, and that the fact that she had a similar reaction would lead them to believe it was fungal or bacterial. I have the itching again, 3 weeks after we had sex, and 1 week after the first occurrence. COuld this be herpes? or is it a yeast infection? What I read on the internet about paper cut sores scared me as I didn't even consider them to be herpes. Im very anxious and would appreciate any help.

Hello sub, I'm a 21F and I need advice on how to remedy this.
I live in Texas and the mosquitos this year have been especially vicious. I had mosquito bites all on my arms and legs that have all by now gone away. However, I first noticed a red itchy spot on the side of my thigh that would just constantly feel itchy no matter what I did. I tried to stop scratching it as it was getting hot and irritated, but it was really difficult. I then felt the same itchiness on my leg but without the redness. Eventually, the spot went away but was soon replaced by a spot on my calf muscle.
I'm not sure what this is. I have dry sensitive skin so I thought maybe I need to moisturize more ( didn't help). I've had contact dermatitis before but I'm not sure what I could've come into contact with that would just affect that small area of my skin, plus it doesn't look similar (at least to me).
Thank you for your time and any advice is greatly appreciated!
A photo will be in the comments.

I was trying to kill a mosquito in my home by throwing red Skittles on it. But then when I looked at the ceiling, I saw like 7 tarantulas, very fluffy and white with black spots like dalmatians, each about the size of an apple. Then my dad tried to kill them and they started dropping from the ceiling while each is slowly becoming much bigger and starting to look like Maui from Moana, but still fluffy and dalmatian, until every one of them reached the floor, human sized, standing on two feet. As it was happening, I took a picture of them and searched on Google Lens, and it said that these are "Brobro", and then they started making that "bruh" sound effect (like in meme videos) repeatedly. They took my dad down and started coming after me, so I ran away outside, but then I realized how ridiculous this is and that is must be a dream, and the dream became lucid (the only lucid dream I ever had). I used it to just fly around my hometown until I woke up, and it was amazing.
I feel like this dream needs to be animated but I'm not that talented lol

Slovakia has multiple cases of murders or disappearances of investigative journalists, and this is one of them that isn't that heavily covered in Slovak media, so I decided to cover this case first.

A Dangerous Job

Pavol Rypal, 39 years old, was an investigative journalist known for exposing the operations of the Slovak mafia. He shed light on crime-related cases and the underworld in Plus 7 Days, Reporters of STV, Krimi SK, and Palba on TV Markiza. Pavol assisted many people who were wrongfully harmed by the state.
"Pavol Rypal was one of the journalists who tackled the most dangerous issues, such as organized crime in the state. Informing about the methods of serious crimes, large sums of money being siphoned, and sophisticated underworld transactions is treacherous terrain for a journalist and often proves inconvenient for many involved parties," says security analyst Juraj Zabojnik.

Last Cases He Worked on Before Disappearance

According to findings by Startitup reporters, just before his disappearance, Pavol was working on a large project involving hundreds of missing people whose cases remained unresolved.
Among the cases on Pavol's list was the disappearance of Katarina Hrozanyova, an ordinary woman, mother of two children, and an official of Slovenska sporitelna (the largest commercial bank in Slovakia). Her mysterious disappearance caught the attention of several journalists at the time.
Members of two rival gangs discussed the tragic fate of this ordinary woman. According to their testimonies, the Takac family, along with the Sator family, were involved in the kidnapping and brutal murder of 37-year-old Katarina. In 2005, an unknown man was supposed to pay a million crowns to the mafia for her liquidation.
The most feared killer from the Sator clan, Zsolt Nagy, known as Conty, allegedly marked the spot in the outskirts of the village of Blazov where he buried Katarina's body. However, her remains have never been found.

The Disappearance

Pavol disappeared on April 22, 2008, from a rented apartment on Rezedova Street in Bratislava, and no one knows where or why. The day before, he tended to work matters, arranged other meetings, and was last seen in Bratislava by the owner of the apartment. Yet, he remains unfound, and he has not contacted his family. Various theories about his disappearance exist, but evidence is lacking.
However, he did not vanish without explanation: he left a handwritten note for his girlfriend, instructing her to take the cats and dispose of his belongings. "I'm sorry, but I saw no other way out," the message read. "Disappearing is not easy; it's mentally taxing." There must be a serious reason behind it. "You have to sever lifelong ties with your closest family," said psychologist Anton Heretik, who also knew him personally, after his disappearance.

Clues About Murder

In 2018, Plus Media reported information from his friend and colleague, Peter Nota. Peter received information about the location where Pavol's body was supposedly buried, apparently in Zazriva village, in the middle of a forest. Over the next two weeks, two more witnesses contacted him, confirming the same location. According to them, there are at least two to three other bodies buried in the area. One of them allegedly belongs to journalist Pavol Rypal, missing for more than a decade.
"Physical harm to him was mentioned by a witness for the first time half a year ago. Then a second witness from Germany spoke, followed by Jana Teleki. Later, I also received several anonymous messages, but I didn't pay them much attention," says Peter Nota.
According to his information, the main reason for Pavol's liquidation were promissory notes, either from TV Markiza or from Ducky. Peter believes that Pavol's body will be found concreted in a well in Zazriva.
"If journalist Pavol Rypal's body was buried in this location, it would definitely confirm that both cases involving promissory notes are connected and have the same owners. According to my information, in both cases, they were BIANKA promissory notes, and the signatures were either forged, even in Ducky's promissory notes, or they were signed later than claimed," Peter reveals.
Ducky's promissory notes were signed by Jan Ducky, director of the Slovak Gas Industry (SPP). Their consideration was supposed to be "services of a commercial and financial nature," which never materialized. The promissory notes were not registered in the accounting of the SPP and therefore it is not known to this day for what amount all the promissory notes were issued, but there is talk of several billion crowns. Some promissory notes could be blank even without specifying the amount. Ducky was found shot dead on January 11, 1999.
In the case of TV Markiza promissory notes, while the controversial Marian Kocner was in the limelight, he engaged in legal battles for significant sums. One such case involved the promissory notes. In mid-June 2016, the mafioso's company sued Pavel Rusko and Markiza TV for the payment of four promissory notes totaling 69 million euros. He claimed that they were issued years ago as part of a settlement over television with his former company, Gamatex. On February 27, 2020, the Specialized Criminal Court convicted Kocner and Rusko of forgery and sentenced them to 19 years in prison.
"In my opinion, the state knew who killed him, just like they did in Daniel Tupy's case," his colleague Peter Nota once wrote on social media.
He also said that he knows who killed him and that the person who ordered it is still alive, while the killer is dead.

State Concealment?

According to Peter Nota, there are individuals who possess comprehensive knowledge about this case. The archive regarding Pavol is allegedly located abroad. It's possible, colloquially speaking, that foreign intelligence services are involved. Peter says that certain foreign entities have meticulously tracked the behavior of Slovak politicians and oligarchs over the past 20 years. They've even mapped out the connections between the underworld and political leaders. In Slovakia, it's feasible to arrange for someone's demise. The famous quote of Pavol Paska (former speaker of parliament for the SMER-SD party) rings true: 'Win the elections and you can do anything.' This includes orchestrating kidnappings, murders, and theft...
Despite this, it's worth noting that the SMER-SD party has been in power for four election cycles, and they continue to hold power even now. Sadly, in the election polls, the populist, pro-Russian party still ranks first.

Family Convinced Pavol Was Murdered

Iveta Uhliarikova, Pavol's sister, also spoke about her brother at the launch of the book Slovak Mafia on the Aktuality portal. According to her, his family worried about him due to his work, and he was certainly in danger. Once, he was supposed to run home because a red light appeared on his shirt.
The family no longer believes that Pavol is alive. But they would like to find his body and bury him.
In 2018, his sister Iveta wrote on Facebook that she had learned the most terrible news: her brother had been murdered. She expressed her grief and revealed the fears that had haunted her and her family. Iveta's post reflected her struggle to remain strong while grappling with the devastating truth. She stated unequivocally that her brother, investigative journalist Pavol Rypal, was no longer alive, and she firmly believed that he had been murdered."
According to TASR, the search for Pavol is ongoing.
Sources:
https://www.zilinak.sk/clanky/27898/od-zmiznutia-novinara-pala-rypala-preslo-16-rokov-podla-sestry-ho-zavrazdili-interpol-ho-stale-hlada
https://www1.pluska.sk/krimi/nezvestny-novinar-palo-rypal-viem-preco-zomrel-sokuje-jeho-kamarat
https://www.startitup.sk/exkluzivne-palo-rypal-je-nezvestny-uz-15-rokov-pred-zmiznutim-pisal-o-katarine-hrozanyovej/
https://domov.sme.sk/c/23160212/pavol-rypal-zmiznutie-vyrocie.html
https://plus7dni.pluska.sk/domov/novinar-palo-rypal-je-nezvestny-15-rokov-odkaz-jeho-sestry-mrazi
https://www.ginn.press/news/palo-rypal
https://www.topky.sk/gl/541133/2150227/Dalsi-zavrazdeny-novinar--Vieme--ze-je-mrtvy--tvrdi-rodina-10-rokov-nezvestneho-Pala-Rypala
https://www.omediach.com/tlac/14264-nezvestny-novinar-pavol-rypal-je-nadalej-v-patrani
https://www.dnes24.sk/desat-rokov-od-zmiznutia-nezvestny-novinar-pavol-rypal-je-nadalej-v-patrani-313469
https://sarm.pluska.sk/pribehy/vrah-pala-rypala-nebeha-slobode-vysetrovanie-podla-jeho-kamarata-pokrocilo/3

Female, 31 years old. 5' 4", ~97 lbs. Entirely healthy pre Sep 2024. I don't have flares or episodes per se, just getting sicker and sicker which more signs of systemic issues.
After 10 months of seeing over 20 specialists, a misdiagnosis that put me on immunosuppressants/biologics for 6 months, ER visits, hospital stays, and almost entirely normal testing... finally received some quite out of range results. And they are... not what I expected.
Symptoms: - Edema (no joint involvement or synovitis) in fingers, hands, knees, and able with large tissue lumps/cysts around ankle bone and feet. This started in my hands only and time got much worse, spreading to other body parts. - Livedo reticularis and rashes: Vasculitis tests are negative (ANCA and biopsy), but livedo is not particularly benign. Always present in ankles and hands / wrists as well as knees. Gets worse when cold but doesn't quite go away upon warming. Maculopapular rash on chest and back. Burning red patches on mottled skin. Intermittent odd rashes that come and go. Constantly purple feet and very obvious evidence of vasoconstriction. - Severe BP fluctuations. I have been sent to the ER for 70/30 before and then once had an acute kidney injure after a period of very elevated BP. Recently, it is 150/110 whilst resting. While it does lower at times slightly in the day, the high or low levels tend to last months. - Acute kidney injury in Feb 24, but quickly resolved after 4 days hospital admission - otherwise rising but normal creatine. - Daily headaches, abdominal issues, significant weight loss. - Tender skin with what looks like small patches of lost pigment (permanent) - Clusters of blood spots, disappear within a few days but reappear elsewhere. New bruising daily. - Abnormal UAs but no infection or bacteria culture growth.
Tests: - All autoimmune, heme, cardiology, neurology tests normal for typically tested conditions. No sign of concern with vein or arteries via Dopplers, aside from diminished PVR waveforms in feet/toes and milt arterial insufficiency in upper extremities. - Very odd MRI results - suggest chronic changes in tendons / ligaments in ankles + edema around the cartilage in knee (I'm slightly underweight, have never been particularly athletic, no prior injury, and am 31 - so unlikely to be overuse) - Punch biopsy on leg (no lesion or ulceration) showed perivascular erythrocyte extravasation, increased vessels, and subcutaneous fibrosis.
Recent tests (normal): - Chromogranin A: 64 (Normal range: 0 - 187 ng/mL) - Metanephrine, Free: 32 (Normal value: <=57 pg/mL)
Abnormal ** - Normetanephrine, Free: 382, ~3x elevated (Normal value: <=148 pg/mL) - Total, Free (Mn+Nmn): 414, ~2x elevated (Normal value: <=205 pg/mL) - Glucagon: <6, low (Normal range: 11 - 78 pg/mL) - Aldosterone, LC/MS: 102, ~5x elevated - Plasma Renin Activity, LC/MS/MS: 3.44 (Normal range: 0.25 - 5.82 ng/mL/h) - ARR: ~30
I understand this suggests adrenal dysfunction / potential tumor - my dr. has been vague as I am guessing he does not want to scare me but these odd results are causing even more anxiety as I don't understand the degree to which they are indicative of such. Next step is 24 hour urine.
More confusing, my Dengue antigen test came out quite high, though antibody low so no current infection. My symptoms began 3 days after a spending a week in USVI - a dengue epidemic. I did not have a typical fever but rashes look similar to "acute phase"... though 10 months later I still have these. I don't see much research on chronic Dengue that lasts this long, but timing seems way too coincidental. I was also put on immunosuppressants within a few weeks of this, so am wondering if it's crazy to think this may have caused long term vessel issues / immune deficiency / and proliferated potential tumors??

Female, 31 years old. 5' 4", ~97 lbs. Entirely healthy pre Sep 2024. I don't have flares or episodes per se, just getting sicker and sicker which more signs of systemic issues.
After 10 months of seeing over 20 specialists, a misdiagnosis that put me on immunosuppressants/biologics for 6 months, ER visits, hospital stays, and almost entirely normal testing... finally received some quite out of range results. And they are... not what I expected.
Symptoms: - Edema (no joint involvement or synovitis) in fingers, hands, knees, and able with large tissue lumps/cysts around ankle bone and feet. This started in my hands only and time got much worse, spreading to other body parts. - Livedo reticularis and rashes: Vasculitis tests are negative (ANCA and biopsy), but livedo is not particularly benign. Always present in ankles and hands / wrists as well as knees. Gets worse when cold but doesn't quite go away upon warming. Maculopapular rash on chest and back. Burning red patches on mottled skin. Intermittent odd rashes that come and go. Constantly purple feet and very obvious evidence of vasoconstriction. - Severe BP fluctuations. I have been sent to the ER for 70/30 before and then once had an acute kidney injure after a period of very elevated BP. Recently, it is 150/110 whilst resting. While it does lower at times slightly in the day, the high or low levels tend to last months. - Acute kidney injury in Feb 24, but quickly resolved after 4 days hospital admission - otherwise rising but normal creatine. - Daily headaches, abdominal issues, significant weight loss. - Tender skin with what looks like small patches of lost pigment (permanent) - Clusters of blood spots, disappear within a few days but reappear elsewhere. New bruising daily. - Abnormal UAs but no infection or bacteria culture growth.
Tests: - All autoimmune, heme, cardiology, neurology tests normal for typically tested conditions. No sign of concern with vein or arteries via Dopplers, aside from diminished PVR waveforms in feet/toes and milt arterial insufficiency in upper extremities. - Very odd MRI results - suggest chronic changes in tendons / ligaments in ankles + edema around the cartilage in knee (I'm slightly underweight, have never been particularly athletic, no prior injury, and am 31 - so unlikely to be overuse) - Punch biopsy on leg (no lesion or ulceration) showed perivascular erythrocyte extravasation, increased vessels, and subcutaneous fibrosis.
Recent tests (normal): - Chromogranin A: 64 (Normal range: 0 - 187 ng/mL) - Metanephrine, Free: 32 (Normal value: <=57 pg/mL)
Abnormal ** - Normetanephrine, Free: 382, ~3x elevated (Normal value: <=148 pg/mL) - Total, Free (Mn+Nmn): 414, ~2x elevated (Normal value: <=205 pg/mL) - Glucagon: <6, low (Normal range: 11 - 78 pg/mL) - Aldosterone, LC/MS: 102, ~5x elevated - Plasma Renin Activity, LC/MS/MS: 3.44 (Normal range: 0.25 - 5.82 ng/mL/h) - ARR: ~30
I understand this suggests adrenal dysfunction / potential tumor - my dr. has been vague as I am guessing he does not want to scare me but these odd results are causing even more anxiety as I don't understand the degree to which they are indicative of such. Next step is 24 hour urine.
More confusing, my Dengue antigen test came out quite high, though antibody low so no current infection. My symptoms began 3 days after a spending a week in USVI - a dengue epidemic. I did not have a typical fever but rashes look similar to "acute phase"... though 10 months later I still have these. I don't see much research on chronic Dengue that lasts this long, but timing seems way too coincidental. I was also put on immunosuppressants within a few weeks of this, so am wondering if it's crazy to think this may have caused long term vessel issues / immune deficiency / and proliferated potential tumors??

I remember this one time when I landed myself in a bit of a pickle. I was visiting my grandma, who lived in this quaint little town at the edge of the mountains. I stepped out to buy some groceries and my car broke down just as I was leaving the supermarket. Naturally, I freaked out. I was stuck in the middle of nowhere with no mobile signal.
There I was, a city boy stuck in an unfamiliar countryside. No transportation, no communication, and the groceries were melting. I glanced at my surroundings, looking for a garage or a telephone booth, but all I saw were fields as far as the eye could see.
Instead of panicking, I decided to take a lateral thinking approach. I started thinking about how to solve this problem creatively. I had some cool soda in the groceries, maybe I could wave down a passing car with the shiny cans reflecting the sun?
But then, I remembered reading about the 'Availability Heuristic' in a mental model book. This mental model suggests that we tend to rely on immediate examples that come to our mind when evaluating a specific topic or decision. So, using the materials I had at my disposal, I came up with another idea.
I grabbed a bag of flour and a pack of red juice from the groceries and made a large 'SOS' sign on the road. A farmer saw the sign and kindly offered me a ride to the nearest repair shop. On the way, we shared a couple of sodas and we even became good friends.
So, remember friends, whenever you're stuck in a tight spot, try to think creatively and make the best out of whatever you have. This event also made me realize how we can turn a problem into an opportunity. Not only did I solve my immediate problem, but I also made a new friend in the process, all thanks to a mental model.
P.S. Don’t judge, this story might sound a bit outlandish, but hey, didn't it just make you picture using Availability Heuristic in your real-life scenarios? Also, yeah, I do ride around with jugs of red juice and bags of flour in the car. Doesn't everyone?

My 2.5 month old boy kitten has a red dot/fleck/mark/debris on the cornea of his eye. I noticed it a week ago and its still there, unchanged, and in the same spot. It is a 1mm x 1mm solid red square 🟥. As far as I can tell, he is completely unbothered by it, it’s like it’s not even there. No irritation, no bleeding, no wincing and no discharge. His pupils dilate as they should, and his sight is fine
I figured it was either something caught in his eye and his tears/eyelid would wash it away or it’s an odd injury from playing with his brother.
I have a few photos with his pupil contracted and expanded and his eye in different positions. You can see the shadow of this dot on his iris. Which is why I’m thinking it’s ON his eye and not IN his eye. (I don’t know how to provide these photos in this subreddit, I have them posted in another subreddit)
I was hoping to see if anyone here has seen something like this before as no one I know + google searches don’t show me anything remotely like this.
He is orange. So maybe this is his brain cell trying to escape? Jokes aside, I would appreciate any advice and or guidance on this! Thank you!

Female, 31 years old. 5' 4", ~97 lbs. Entirely healthy pre Sep 2024. I don't have flares or episodes per se, just getting sicker and sicker which more signs of systemic issues.
After 10 months of seeing over 20 specialists, a misdiagnosis that put me on immunosuppressants/biologics for 6 months, ER visits, hospital stays, and almost entirely normal testing... finally received some quite out of range results. And they are... not what I expected.
Symptoms: - Edema (no joint involvement or synovitis) in fingers, hands, knees, and able with large tissue lumps/cysts around ankle bone and feet. This started in my hands only and time got much worse, spreading to other body parts. - Livedo reticularis and rashes: Vasculitis tests are negative (ANCA and biopsy), but livedo is not particularly benign. Always present in ankles and hands / wrists as well as knees. Gets worse when cold but doesn't quite go away upon warming. Maculopapular rash on chest and back. Burning red patches on mottled skin. Intermittent odd rashes that come and go. Constantly purple feet and very obvious evidence of vasoconstriction. - Severe BP fluctuations. I have been sent to the ER for 70/30 before and then once had an acute kidney injure after a period of very elevated BP. Recently, it is 150/110 whilst resting. While it does lower at times slightly in the day, the high or low levels tend to last months. - Acute kidney injury in Feb 24, but quickly resolved after 4 days hospital admission - otherwise rising but normal creatine. - Daily headaches, abdominal issues, significant weight loss. - Tender skin with what looks like small patches of lost pigment (permanent) - Clusters of blood spots, disappear within a few days but reappear elsewhere. New bruising daily. - Abnormal UAs but no infection or bacteria culture growth.
Tests: - All autoimmune, heme, cardiology, neurology tests normal for typically tested conditions. No sign of concern with vein or arteries via Dopplers, aside from diminished PVR waveforms in feet/toes and milt arterial insufficiency in upper extremities. - Very odd MRI results - suggest chronic changes in tendons / ligaments in ankles + edema around the cartilage in knee (I'm slightly underweight, have never been particularly athletic, no prior injury, and am 31 - so unlikely to be overuse) - Punch biopsy on leg (no lesion or ulceration) showed perivascular erythrocyte extravasation, increased vessels, and subcutaneous fibrosis.
Recent tests (normal): - Chromogranin A: 64 (Normal range: 0 - 187 ng/mL) - Metanephrine, Free: 32 (Normal value: <=57 pg/mL)
Abnormal ** - Normetanephrine, Free: 382, ~3x elevated (Normal value: <=148 pg/mL) - Total, Free (Mn+Nmn): 414, ~2x elevated (Normal value: <=205 pg/mL) - Glucagon: <6, low (Normal range: 11 - 78 pg/mL) - Aldosterone, LC/MS: 102, ~5x elevated - Plasma Renin Activity, LC/MS/MS: 3.44 (Normal range: 0.25 - 5.82 ng/mL/h) - ARR: ~30
I understand this suggests adrenal dysfunction / potential tumor - my dr. has been vague as I am guessing he does not want to scare me but these odd results are causing even more anxiety as I don't understand the degree to which they are indicative of such. Next step is 24 hour urine.
More confusing, my Dengue antigen test came out quite high, though antibody low so no current infection. My symptoms began 3 days after a spending a week in USVI - a dengue epidemic. I did not have a typical fever but rashes look similar to "acute phase"... though 10 months later I still have these. I don't see much research on chronic Dengue that lasts this long, but timing seems way too coincidental. I was also put on immunosuppressants within a few weeks of this, so am wondering if it's crazy to think this may have caused long term vessel issues / immune deficiency / and proliferated potential tumors??

This isn't something I'd ever want to repeat ever again, but I already went through a horrible burn (it felt like a chemical burn) while using tretinoin. Long story short - I layered tretinoin with a new serum and moisturizer without 1) doing a patch test and 2) waiting until a non-tret night.
I woke up and my skin was screaming. Red. inflamed, burning, sensitive to the touch and throbbing. It was the worst thing I've ever dealt with related to skincare. Pretty sure some actives were in there that I missed, so my skin absolutely and horribly freaked out. So here is my advice and I hope that it helps in case it ever happens to you.
I recommend you purchase these (or at least purchase #1, 2 and 3):

1. OTC Hydrocortisone ointment (OINTMENT, not cream - the cream will sting).
   
2. Zinc oxide cream (aka. Diaper rash cream). I used Desitin since it had the highest percentage of zinc that I could find.
   
3. La Roche Posay Cicaplast Balm B5 (also high in zinc). Known to calm inflammation, dryness, redness, etc.
   
4. Aestura Atobarrier 365 Cream (in a tube) or any barrier cream that suits your skin, but this worked amazing for me.
   
5. If not Aestura - vaseline, aquaphor, etc. should work too but I get milia easily. I heard facial oils like rosehip, jojoba, etc. can work well too but I didn't go that route. Any barrier cream should work, just make sure it has good ingredients and is fragrance free/suitable for sensitive skin.
   

***
Stage 1: Red, burning, stinging, itchy, inflamed = The worst stage.
Do not wash your face. Do not use any moisturizers formulated with water. I know that sounds weird because you want to hydrate your skin to soothe it, right?
Welp, using water-based products on your face will just make it burn like hell and sting more. Just don't do it. As a matter of fact, stop ALL skincare products immediately until you heal your skin.
Immediately apply the hydrocortisone ointment in a very thin layer. It'll help bring the inflammation down. Then apply a thin layer of diaper rash cream. The first two nights, I used an old pillow case and went to sleep with a diaper rash cream mask.
Continue this until the inflammation calms down (I took about 2 days of this until my skin moved onto stage 2).
Stage 2: Sensitive, itchy, still inflamed but not as bad as stage 1.
You can splash your face with water but don't use any cleansers right away. Trust me, your skin isn't "dirty". It's crying for help, so the most important thing is to soothe/heal your skin first.
Once the inflammation is down, apply the cicaplast balm b5. Continue applying it throughout the day as needed to make sure your face remains hydrated. Before you go to bed, apply another diaper rash cream mask. Continue until your skin is feeling better.
Stage 3: Starting to heal and sensitive, but not inflamed, itchy or stinging at all anymore.
At this point, you can slowly start introducing a gentle cleanser back in. Continue moisturizing with cicaplast balm b5, but I started using Aestura in combination because cicaplast is so thick throughout the day for me.
I still didn't use any of my skincare products at this stage, even though I felt a lot better. I waited until I knew FOR SURE that I had healed, and then I slowly incorporated them back in at a later time.
Your skin should feel a lot better after a week.
Key points:

1. Don't use hydrocortisone on your face for too long. It's not good, so only use it as needed to bring the redness/burning/stinging down.
   
2. Trust me and make sure to use diaper rash cream because it's incredibly soothing. It doesn't feel that comfortable because it's so thick, and I looked like Casper for a few days, but I'm confident that it's what helped my skin heal so fast. Amazon sells them, but you can also find them at drugstores/Target, etc.
   
3. Cicaplast Balm B5 is amazing for its soothing/healing properties, and it absorbs a lot better than the diaper rash cream. This won't heal your skin as much as the diaper cream, but it's great to use after Stage 1.
   
4. Introduce your skincare products after at least 2 week. Definitely do not use any retinol, tretinoin, acids, etc. until you know for sure your skin can handle it or you're just setting yourself back again.
   
5. Make sure to stay hydrated and stay out of the sun during this process.
   

Be safe and hope this helps!

Okay, I am about 9 weeks pregnant and only found out a couple days ago. The father to this child and I were not a thing together beforehand and agreed to be just friends like a week before. My reason being was that we did not share the same level of interest (he was more into me), sex was pretty shit and a lot of time, he just gave me the ick (eg. whining like a little girl when he gets woken up in the middle of the night, very serious ALL the time, acts like a baby sometimes).
However, since finding out about the pregnancy he has been so good and supportive. Brings me fruit everyday because thats what I have been craving. Is so invested into the pregnancy (wants to know everything, reads books and more). Drives me around everywhere and lets me know, if I need anything, even just an orange in the middle of the night - He'll get it straight away.
But if I spend more than a day with him, I feel really suffocated. Last night, he came and put his hand on my tummy. Then whispered "Hello?", "Can you hear me?" like in a scared little kid voice and it was so weird. Then after, he tried to initiate more intimate things and it was the first time he was over since we agreed to be friends. It really felt like he was trying to suck reassurance out of my body in such an insecure way. I am just really confused.