Citron: citrus fan story
Chapter 1:”Limelight”
A loud groan escaped my lips as the shrill notes of nano.RIPE's 'Azalea' reverberated from my electric alarm clock at the ungodly hour of 8:00 am. A familiar voice, that of my mama, Yuzu, cut through the morning haze from the kitchen below. I sat up in bed, my surroundings still blurry with sleep. As my vision slowly cleared, I realized I was in my sprawling and charming bedroom. But hold on! Before we dive further, allow me to introduce myself...
My name is Yumi Aihara, and yes, it's me, the one and only! A fabulous 14-year-old with black hair and piercing purple eyes. My family is…well, unique. My mother, Mei, is a strict, traditional woman, while my other mother, Yuzu, puts her children's needs above everything else. Together, they run the prestigious Aihara Girls Academy. As for me, I have three younger siblings: Joshua-Kai, a brilliant 12-year-old; Emi, an 8-year-old who acts like the boss but is fiercely loyal; and the adorable baby Emi. We might look like a picture-perfect, happy family, but the truth is, it's not that simple, especially for me. I'm destined to inherit Aihara Academy, but it's not my dream.
My ambition is to become a renowned ice skater, captivating audiences with my talent. While I don't aspire to take over the academy, there's another layer to this desire. My mother, Mei, has poured her heart and soul into the school, making it her life's work. It's almost like her child. Since high school, she's dedicated herself to the academy, even becoming the first female chairwoman at 19. This unwavering devotion has meant missing every birthday, Christmas, and countless other important moments in our family's life. The sacrifices she's made have also impacted mama and my younger siblings.
for clarification:
mother=mei
mama=yuzu
p.s. I'm thinking of doing the chapters as pages, so i have more motivation to write.

... and I'm really happy with it! It's for my birthday and I'm excited to get it all set up.
However, I've only used other methods of making coffee previously, from French press, to chemex, to aeropress. This is a new beast to me.
The grinder we have is a cuisinart Burr grinder, but I am getting the sense that this won't quite cut it, so I've been given a bit of a choice; we can return the bambino plus and get one with a built in burr grinder (perhaps the barista pro or express impress) or buy a grinder which is about the same sort of money as it'd be to get the combined.
I know that this sub has a high end outlook, but I'm looking to get started and wondered what thoughts are on these options, and whether I am in fact being too brutal towards my cuisinart grinder?

Don’t get me wrong suicide is bad and no one should do it. But I can’t help but think like what’s the point? I’m by no means a sad guy to others, I smile all the time and I’m always nice and giving, willing to help, want to make people days better. I’m an unbelievably nice and happy guy to people. It’s all my work place talks about is how nice I am and how much fresh air he brings to their day and I appreciate it. It makes me feel good but I can’t help but feel depressed all the time. Those silent moments inbetween words, sentences, letters I just think of suicide.
I look at my mother and father a lot and wonder how is it that they haven’t killed themselves. I wonder why the people on tv, the people I know haven’t done it. Only a few people do I see and be like “their life is great” and I understand but for everyone else idk. My father is a lonly man, his gf of around 16 years cheated on him and now he lives alone in an empty house barely making rent or money. He given up everything he loves so he can make his rent. Why? What drives him? Is it me? Is it that he has a kid? I could understand that. My mother has a twin and is very very close, both have kids and I consider my cousin a sister. But I look at them and wish I had someone like that, someone to love. Just have fun or just be together. But I know for everyone else, it isn’t likely. How many people do you hear abt being broken up with or something like that? I think my worst nightmare is to have something one day and to lose it the next. I’m literally my father, same mannerisms and so nice that it should be a con. If he can’t make it how can I? My dream is to be with a woman that can help us raise our children. I want the typical white picket fence, doesn’t have to be perfect but just something. I want to see my son succeed or my daughter finally learn to drive and I want to give my wife love that can sustain her. But especially with the world now, cheating is rampant, options are plentiful. What’s the point? Wont there always be someone better? And they leave you, no house no kids no wife, no life. If my life’s this bad and I haven’t lost everything then how bad will it be when I do? Isn’t it logical to just end it? I hate begging for sympathy and I don’t want it, but doesn’t it make sense?

Which GameCube Mario Party has the best 4 player minigame set? And Why?'
Here are the lists:
4: Manta Rings, Slime Time, Booksquirm, Mario Medley, Avalanche!, Domination, Paratroopa Plunge, Toad's Quick Draw, Three Throw, Photo Finish, Mr. Blizzard's Brigade, Long Claw of the Law, Stamp Out!, Mario Speedwagons, Take a Breather
5: Coney Island, Ground Pound Down, Chimp Chase, Chomp Romp, Pushy Penguins, Leaf Leap, Night Light Fright, Pop-Star Piranhas, Mazed & Confused, Dinger Derby, Hydrostars, Later Skater, Will Flower, Triple Jump, Hotel Goomba, Coin Cashe, Vicious Vending, Flower Shower, Dodge Bomb, Fish Upon a Star, Rumble Fumble, Frozen Frenzy, Fish Sticks
6: Smashdance, Odd Card Out, Freeze Frame, What Goes Up..., Granite Getaway, Circuit Maximus, Catch You Letter, Snow Whirled, Daft Rafts, Tricky Tires, Treasure Trawlers, Memory Lane, Mowtown, Cannonball Fun, Note to Self, Same is Lame, Lift Leapers, Blooper Scooper, Trap Ease Artist, Pokey-Punch Out, Money Belt, Sunday Drivers, Throw me a Bone
7: Catchy Tunes, Bubble Brawl, Track & Yield, Fun Run, Cointagious, Snow Ride, Picture This, Ghost in the Hall, Big Dripper, Target Tag, Pokey Pummel, Take me Ohm, Kart Wheeled
View Poll

**Trigger warning for in-depth discussion of the deaths and bodies of children*\*
Many of you probably know the story of the Unknown Child, or Body #4 – the body of a baby boy recovered from the sea shortly after the sinking of the Titanic and buried in Halifax’s Fairview Cemetery. Unidentified for years, he was speculated to be either Gosta Palsson or Eugene Rice, tentatively identified with DNA analysis as Eino Panula in 2002, and definitively identified through improved DNA testing in 2007 as Sidney Goodwin. The Unknown Child has come to represent all the young lives who were lost in the disaster.
However, much less well-known is the mystery of Body #1. Pulled from the icy Atlantic on April 21^st 1912 by the cable ship Mackay Bennett, the body of an approximately 10-12-year-old boy was the first of 337 Titanic victims to be recovered. Officially, Body #1 was identified as Walter John van Billiard, a 9-year-old third-class boy who perished along with his father Austin and 10-year-old brother James William. He was buried next to his father, whose body was also recovered, in the Whitemarsh Union Cemetery of Zion Lutheran Church, Flourtown, Pennsylvania. However, doubt has always lingered among Titanic researchers and enthusiasts over the true identity of the body. In this post, I’ll examine the case for and against the body’s identification as Walter Van Billiard, investigate some other possibilities for its identity, and summarize my findings.
A few disclaimers: firstly, I’m not a professional, just someone who’s been interested in the Titanic (and specifically its child/teen passengers) for a long time.
Secondly, although I’ve never seen a detailed write-up on Body #1 before, others have discussed this topic and arrived at similar conclusions as mine, so I’m not breaking any entirely new ground here.
Finally, this post isn’t meant to disrespect or offend any of the Van Billiard family or to shatter the idea of a father and son resting beside each other. I’m just trying to take a critical look at the identification of Body #1 and suggest some alternate possibilities.
Approximately 115 Titanic passengers and crew under the age of 18 were lost, and very few of their bodies were ever found. In attempting to identify one of them, I hope to honour them all.

Part I: The Van Billiards

Walter and James van Billiard (photo here) were the two eldest sons of Austin Blyler van Billiard and Maude Murray. One or both boys had been born in Paris, France, but spent most of their lives in Africa, where the family was engaged in diamond mining. By April 1912, the Van Billiards had had four more children and wanted to return to Austin’s family in North Wales, Pennsylvania. They travelled to London, where Maude fell ill. It was decided that she would stay there with her parents and her four youngest children to recuperate, while Austin would take James and Walter ahead to America. Austin’s parents had never met any of their grandchildren before, and he wanted them to spend Easter together. Tragically, they booked third-class on the RMS Titanic, and the rest is history. No survivor accounts mention the Van Billiards by name, so it is unknown how they passed their time on the ship or how exactly they met their ends. A newspaper article (Daily Home News, April 23rd 1912) suggests the boys may have refused to leave their father, but it’s equally likely they simply arrived on deck too late to have the option of boarding a lifeboat.
What is known is that two bodies purported to be members of the Van Billiard family were later recovered and sent to Austin’s relatives in Pennsylvania for burial. Body #255, that of an approximately 40-year-old man with a dark red beard and moustache, was identified as Austin. Body #1, allegedly young Walter, was described as such:
No. 1 – MALE – ESTIMATED AGE. – 10-12. – HAIR. LIGHT.
CLOTHING – Overcoat, grey; one grey coat; one blue coat; grey woolen jersey; white shirt; grey knickers; black stockings; black boots
EFFECTS – Purse containing few Danish coins and ring; two handkerchiefs marked “A”.
Probably Third Class.
Furthermore, the “Inventory of the property found on the body of the late W. VanBilliard” adds that the purse also contained one United States cent and “three wooden disks.” This document can be viewed online at the Nova Scotia Archives website. Interestingly, “Unable to identify from clothing or effects” has been written across the middle of the page in pencil. Further down, it says “Remains shipped. See #255.”
Right off the bat, it's unclear why Body #1 was identified as that of 9-year-old Walter, as opposed to 10-year-old James – or, in fact, why a connection with the Van Billiards was made at all. The Philadelphia Inquirer of May 8^th 1912, reporting on the arrival of the bodies in Pennsylvania, states that identification was made “through the Red Cross Society and papers found on their persons.” However, no such papers are mentioned among the effects found on either body, despite this being common practice for the descriptions of Titanic victims’ bodies.
It is also noteworthy that no member of the Van Billiard family was reported as having identified or even viewed the bodies. Identification would, of course, have taken place at Halifax, where the recovered bodies were brought before being buried there or forwarded elsewhere, and I could find absolutely nothing to suggest that any Van Billiard travelled to Halifax to view them. The North American newspaper of May 8th 1912 states quite clearly that Austin’s father, Burgess James van Billiard, was in Pennsylvania when the bodies arrived. Maude and the other children were still in England, and in fact would not make the trip to America until February 1913, almost a full year after the disaster.
Moreover, it must be remembered that none of the Van Billiard family members in America had ever seen their grandsons. They may have seen photographs of them, but this doesn’t necessarily mean that they’d be able to identify a body which had spent six days floating in the freezing ocean. There are stories from other maritime disasters of the era, such as the General Slocum (1904), the Eastland (1915), and the Princess Sophia (1918) of children’s bodies being misidentified (or dubiously identified), even by close relatives. Therefore, even if Burgess van Billiard or another family member had seen Body #1, would that have conclusively proven that it was Walter (or James)? Or would it simply be a case of a grief-stricken human being clinging to the belief that their loved one was one of the few recovered from an icy grave?
According to Judith Geller’s Titanic: Women and Children First, “popular reports” of the time stated that Austin’s body was found with Walter’s clasped to his chest. However, as she goes on to state, this was not the case. This can be seen plainly from the numbers of the bodies, which were assigned in the order that they were retrieved. Body #1 was recovered on April 21^st, while Body #255 would not have been picked up until April 25^th, according to the diary of Mackay Bennett crewman Clifford Crease. Therefore, identification of Body #1 cannot have been made by its proximity to Austin Van Billiard.
The effects found upon Body #1 also do nothing to prove, or even suggest, that the body was that of Walter Van Billiard. It is true that the handkerchiefs marked “A” could have belonged to Austin, but “A” could stand for many other names of those on board the Titanic. The Danish coins are a tantalizing clue, but none of the Van Billiard family was known to have lived in or visited Denmark. (Of course, it’s possible that the coins could have been misidentified – perhaps they were actually Belgian or Boer, as the Van Billiards lived in both the Belgian Congo and South Africa; or Dutch, as Austin Van Billiard is known to have visited Amsterdam shortly before embarking on the Titanic. (Perhaps the “A” handkerchief was a souvenir from the city?) However, these are only theories.)
It has never been conclusively accepted by Titanic researchers and enthusiasts that Body #1 is that of Walter Van Billiard. Walter’s entry on Encyclopedia Titanica contains the footnote: “Because of the effects recovered with the body there has to be some doubt over the authenticity of the identification.” Similarly, Women and Children First states that “the body might in fact have easily been that of another Third Class boy.” That book’s section on the Van Billiards ends with the somber observation that “a monument to [the] husband and two sons … stands in the Whitemarsh Union Cemetery, but only two (and perhaps one) of them lie beneath it.” Whether or not Walter van Billiard was truly Body #1, one hopes that this (mis?)identification brought some solace to his surviving family members.

Part II: Other Possibilities

With it being established that there is no conclusive proof that body #1 belonged to either of the Van Billiard boys, let us examine other possibilities. I have assembled a list of all male Titanic victims between the ages of 8 and 14 whose bodies were never found. The reason for extending this range is that the estimated ages given to bodies were not always entirely accurate. For example, the body of 12-year-old William Sage was estimated to be 14, the body of 16-year-old Rossmore Abbott was estimated as 22, and the body of 17-year-old Ernest Price was estimated as 26.
Our candidates are:

1. Eugene Joseph Abbott, 13
2. Filip Oscar Asplund, 13
3. Clarence Gustaf Hugo Asplund, 9
4. William Neal Thomas Ford, 14
5. Charles Edward Goodwin, 14
6. William Frederick Goodwin, 13
7. Harold Victor Goodwin, 10
8. Frederick William Hopkins, 14
9. Husayn Mahmud Husayn Ibrahim, 11
10. William Andrew Johnston, 8
11. Albert Rice, 10
12. George Rice, 8
13. Betros Seman, 10
14. Karl Thorsten Skoog, 11
15. George Frederick Sweet, 14
16. William Albert Watson, 14

A few possibilities can be easily excluded from this list:

• Karl Skoog had been involved in a railway accident at the age of 7 and had to have his left leg and the toes on his right foot amputated. He used crutches for mobility. It is impossible that such an obvious feature as a missing or prosthetic leg would not have been noted in the descriptions of the bodies.
• Husayn Ibrahim and Betros Seman were from Lebanon. It is unlikely (though not impossible) that a Middle Eastern boy would have had blonde hair or carried Danish coins. Accounts from the era almost invariably describe Middle Eastern passengers as “dark-complexioned,” “foreign-looking,” or “Italian types” – a detail which does not appear in the body’s description.

Several more possibilities can be marked as unlikely, if not ruled out entirely:

• In the only known photo of the Goodwin family, the boys all seem to have had dark hair. The eldest boy, Charles, was also only 2 months away from his 15^th birthday, putting him at the very edge of our age range and making it relatively unlikely that he would be mistaken for a 10-12-year-old (let alone one who could feasibly be 9 years old).
  • However, one point in the Goodwins’ favour is that the body of their youngest brother, Sidney Leslie (the ‘Unknown Child’) was found, meaning at least one member of the family was above decks at the moment of the sinking.
• George Frederick Sweet was one day away from turning 15, and was not permitted (or did not want) to board a lifeboat along with his adoptive mother and sisters, implying that he looked his age and could not have been mistaken for a preteen. A purported* photograph of him circa 1912 also shows him as dark-haired. Finally, he was in second class, while the body was described as “probably third class” (although this is hardly conclusive).
• Frederick Hopkins and William Watson were members of the crew, Hopkins being a plate steward and Watson a bellboy. It is therefore possible, if not certain, that they would have been wearing some sort of uniform rather than the clothing the body was described as wearing. Furthermore, like Charles Goodwin and George Sweet, both were within several months of turning 15.

Our list is thus reduced to:

1. Eugene Joseph Abbott, 13
2. Filip Oscar Asplund, 13
3. Clarence Gustaf Hugo Asplund, 9
4. William Neal Thomas Ford, 14
5. William Andrew Johnston, 8
6. Albert Rice, 10
7. George Rice, 8

Now, let us look at each of these boys in turn and examine the evidence for and against them being Body #1.
Eugene Joseph Abbott:

• His last name starts with A, meaning the handkerchief could be his.
• He was originally from (and was returning to) the U.S., so may have carried American money.
• He was just 2 weeks past his 13^th birthday, meaning he could likely have passed for 12 (within the estimated age range for the body).
• He and his family were known to have been on deck right at the time of the sinking, rather than belowdecks in the steerage areas. His mother, Rhoda, was the only woman to be rescued alive from the water, and his older brother Rossmore’s body was found (#190).
• He may have had fair hair – his brother’s body is described as being “very fair,” though it’s unknown if this refers to skin or hair. An alleged* photo of him from the Pigeon Forge Titanic Museum shows a light-haired boy. However, both his mother and brother appear to have dark hair in photos taken of them.
• There is nothing to suggest he would have had Danish coins.

William Neal Thomas Ford:
Little is known about Ford, an English youth emigrating to the USA with his extended family and a family friend. None of their bodies are known to have been recovered (although they may be among the unidentified). He has no known connection to the letter A or to the nation of Denmark. Therefore, I see him as among the most unlikely of these boys to be Body #1.
William Andrew Johnston:
William Johnston, a cousin of William Ford, is a slightly more likely candidate for two reasons. Firstly, his father’s name (and his own middle name) was Andrew, providing a connection to the letter A. Secondly, in the one photo of him provided by the Titanic Museum in Pigeon Forge,* he appears to have had light hair.
Albert and George Rice:

• The Rice family is known to have been on either the boat deck or A-Deck on the night of the sinking (reported by family friend Bridget Mulvihill, who survived), and their mother Margaret’s body was recovered. In fact, her body was #12, meaning her body was presumably located far closer to #1 than Austin Van Billiard’s was. (Though this doesn’t necessarily mean much given how far apart the bodies might have drifted, how they might have been flung around by the ship’s foundering, etc.)
• They were originally from the U.S., having only lived in Ireland for about a year following the death of their father.
• Albert’s first name, of course, starts with “A.” One may imagine that, perhaps, Margaret Rice might have given handkerchiefs to all her sons with their own first initials embroidered on them.
• Their hair colour is difficult to determine from photographs – it looks on the darker side to me, but this may simply be due to poor lighting.

Filip and Clarence Asplund:
I believe the Asplund boys are the strongest possible candidates for body #1, due to the following evidence:

• They have, by far, the strongest association with Danish coins out of all the boys I have examined. The Asplund family was of Swedish descent; most of their 5 children had been born in the U.S., but they later returned to Sweden and had been living there about 4 years before deciding to return once again to America in 1912. Their home in Sweden was Alseda Village, Småland, located relatively far south in the country; they certainly lived closer to Denmark than anyone else on this list, and very likely passed through it on their way to England to board the Titanic. It is even possible that the coins were not Danish but Swedish – someone more knowledgeable about early 20^th-century Scandinavian currency would have to tell me how similar they looked.
• Furthermore, as they had once lived in the U.S. and were travelling back there, it makes sense for them to have been carrying American money as well.
• Obviously, the “A” on the handkerchief could be for Asplund.
• As Swedes, the boys could very well have had light hair. It’s hard to make out their hair colour in the only known photos of them (Filip, Clarence), but surviving siblings Lillian and Felix appear to have had light hair in some photos (1, 2)
• The entire family was known to have been on one of the upper decks (Boat or A) at the end. As third-class passengers, they arrived there quite late in the sinking. Mother Selma managed to board one of the later lifeboats (I have seen boats 10, 15, 4, and Collapsible C all suggested) along with children Felix (3) and Lillian (5), but somehow the three other children – Filip, Clarence, and Lillian’s twin Carl – were left on board with their father, also named Carl. Furthermore, Carl Sr.’s body was recovered (No. 142), further proving that the Asplunds were up on deck during the final plunge.

If I had to choose between the two Asplund boys for the true identity of body #1, I would suggest that it was 9½ year old Clarence, rather than 13-year-old Filip, due to the fact that those identifying the body clearly deemed it likely to belong to a 9-year-old. However, I think either boy is a likely option.

Part III: Conclusion

None of this is to say that I think the body couldn’t have been one of the Van Billiard boys. After all, there had to be *something* that caused Walter Van Billiard to be singled out amongst all the other possible candidates. Any of the clues I pointed out in this post may have been red herrings.
Maybe the “A” handkerchiefs were a parting gift from a friend whose first or last name started with that letter, or a souvenir of some city the boy had visited. Maybe the Danish coins were simply picked up off the deck, or given to this boy by a Danish passenger for whom he had done a favor. Maybe the age estimate was far off, and the boy was actually a tall 7-year-old or a very young-looking 15-year-old. Maybe Walter really is resting alongside his father in Union Cemetery, Flourtown, Pennsylvania. In the end, unless DNA analysis is ever done, we will never know the true identity of body #1.
My personal ranking of likelihood, out of all the boys examined, is:

1. Clarence or Filip Asplund (in that order), aged 9 and 13
2. Walter or James Van Billiard, aged 9 and 10
3. Eugene Abbott, aged 13
4. Albert or George Rice (in that order), aged 10 and 8
5. William Andrew Johnston, aged 8
6. William Neal Thomas Ford, aged 14
7. Harold, William, or Charles Goodwin (in that order), aged 10, 13, and 14 – I might even bump Harold (and possibly William) up higher than William Ford due to their younger age.
8. Frederick Hopkins or William Watson, aged 14
9. George Frederick Sweet, aged 14 (almost 15)
10. Husayn Ibrahim, aged 11, or Betros Seman, aged 10
11. Anthony William Sage, aged 12 – borderline impossible as Will Sage’s ticket was found on body #67, meaning that was almost certainly him. Perhaps an onboard friend of his had stolen his ticket as a prank, or they had switched tickets to keep as mementoes of each other, but I find this quite unlikely.
12. Karl Thorsten Skoog, aged 11 – impossible; his missing or prosthetic leg would certainly have been noted.

The true tragedy of Body #1 is the fact that there are so many possible candidates for its identification. In memory of all these boys and their families who were lost on the morning of April 15^th 1912.
^\I have some doubts about the veracity of some photographs from the Titanic Pigeon Forge Museum, but the vast majority of the photos I've seen from there are genuine. I can elaborate further in the comments if anyone is interested.)

Yall are delusional af. We all know that Zack belongs to Aerith and Cloud belongs to Tifa! Cloud literally kisses Tifa. (Those dates show how Cloud truly feels about each party member) And Tifa makes up 90% of Rebirth and Remake. And Cloud literally confesses to Tifa in the OG life stream scene and they share there feelings together under the highwind through words and body. They literally adopt Denzel and Marlene AS A FAMILY. Cloud and Tifa are PARENTS TOGETHER! I don’t know how this isn’t clear. And we all know Aerith only likes Cloud because he reminds her of Zack. She literally says it herself. And when Cloud asks if she still likes him she says “Maybe”. The girl even wrote a whole love letter to him. You think she’s just gonna move onto Cloud because Zack has been dead for 5 years??? She was in love with him. I don’t think she’d just move on like that. Like yeah, maybe Cloud kinda liked Aerith when she was alive. But now she’s dead. And she can be happy and in love with Zack in the life stream and Cloti can be together and raise a family just like how Tifa wanted

I’m planning on confronting him about him distancing himself and losing feelings/interest in me tomorrow to clear things up and it’ll most likely end in a breakup. This is the letter in question:
What hurts the most isn’t having to leave you
Well, maybe it’s part of it. But I’ve come to accept it, this decision. Thinking about saying goodbye to you, never looking at you or talking to you in the same way, closing this chapter of our lives. I’ve had the time to grieve and process it and realize. People change, and I tried my best to save us, but it takes two to tango.
What hurts the most is remembering the way you used to love me. Truly, you showed me what love was, and what love could be. The way you gave me a whole Polaroid that you bought with your hard-earned money when we weren’t even dating. The way you rarely dreamed yet dreamed of me. The way you were never good with words but did your best to write the most beautiful words I’ve read in my life. The way you encouraged me to experience life by taking me to every place we hadn’t gone and keeping track of the movies I haven’t watched. The way you let me name your first car. The way you talked about our future plans. The way we spent hours talking about nothing and everything at the same time. When I see the Polaroids in my room, the photos on my phone, the messages we exchanged, I sometimes think back to these times. I wonder what changed for you, how things got to where they are now, but I guess you must’ve had your reasons. I would like to think the adventures we’ve had and the challenges we’ve faced weren’t all for nothing.
I hope someday you’ll be able to look back on the time we shared fondly. But if you choose to forget me I understand. Delete your pictures of me or throw away the things I gave you, do whatever you need to do. I remember you told me before really early on that you were beginning to lose the point of things but you wanted to become great because of me. Well, I wish I could’ve continued to help motivate you, but even back then, I knew I couldn’t, because the only one who can is yourself. I hope that you want to be great and live a fulfilling life for you. I know you can, from the way those around you smile at the sight of you and talk about the happiness you bring into their lives to the way your eyes light up when you talk about cars and all the ways you’re planning to customize your car. I know that as long as you work for it and put your mind to it, you can do more than you could ever imagine, so never let anyone doubt your abilities, not even yourself. Finally, I wish you happiness. I wish you are able to continue to do fun shenanigans with your friends, find your special someone, and have the family and life you’ve always wanted. I wish you find something or someone worth living and fighting for. I’ll probably no longer be in your life from now on but I’m glad I was able to be a part of it.
In the end I’ll leave off with this: From the beginning to the end of this, I’ve loved you (his name). Goodbye.

It's difficult to find someone who doesn't have strong opinions about which of the different types of cake flavors is the best. Each of us has a favorite type and flavor.
It may be a mile-high, rich and sweet layer cake with lots of frosting for some. Others prefer a lighter cake with a dollop of whipped cream and fresh berries, such as angel food cake.
Some people will only eat homemade cakes when it comes to birthday cakes, but a few of us enjoy a good old-fashioned grocery store cake or even a cookie cake with a letter scribbled in tube icing.
Whatever your preferences, knowing the facts about different types of cake flavors is beneficial. Cakes are ideal for sweets, gatherings, celebrations, and pretty much everything else.
There are many distinct cake flavors, and You can combine them in many ways, such as red velvet and vanilla cakes.
Nowadays, you can make cakes in almost any flavor and shape. There is a great cake flavor out there for whatever occasion or craving.
However, not all flavors complement one other. Some flavor combinations are simply superior to others. Cakes are a delectable and traditional part of any celebration, and it is your responsibility as a baker and host to provide the best options available.
Without much ado, let's discuss some of th different types of cake flavors available.

1. Yellow Butter Cake

A sheet cake variation of this delicacy, covered with billows of chocolate frosting and rainbow sprinkles, is served at many kids' birthday parties.
Also, c the butter and sugar together (with an electric mixer in modern times) is a standard method for making yellow butter cakes, then adding dry and wet ingredients.
There are also "dump" variations, in which all of the ingredients are simply combined in a bowl.

2. Red Velvet Cake

A chemical reaction between cocoa powder and acidic buttermilk turns red velvet cake scarlet, but a drop of red food coloring makes the bright cake shine.
The delectable cream cheese frosting is an absolute must. This is a true Southern classic and a great favorite. The color of red velvet cake derives from the reaction of buttermilk and cocoa powder when made with either butter or oil.
Also, modern variations often use red food coloring, or in the instance of the raspberry velvet cake shown here, pink food coloring.

3. Pound Cake

This cake doesn't rise much when baking and has a dense texture. It's named after the fact that it's made using a pound of each of the key ingredients (flour, butter, and sugar).
Matcha and cocoa powder is used in our version, although vanilla essence is used in traditional recipes. Bake one of these in a loaf pan or a Bundt pan. This is one of the different types of cake flavors.

4. Carrot Cake

Carrot cake is a shorter cake leavened with baking soda and baking powder and utilizes oil instead of butter as its primary fat.
Also, The inclusion of grated carrots adds moisture to the cake. Warm spices flavor the carrot cake, topped with a luscious cream cheese frosting. Walnuts or pecans are optional!.
Furthermore, Carrot cake recipes vary in the quantity and amount of spices used and the addition of nuts and fruit.
Still, tender chunks of sweet carrot, an ideal dosage of cinnamon, and a fantastic frosting are what make a perfect carrot cake. Try our Carrot Cake Cupcakes recipe.

5. Sponge Cake

This foam-style cake has no artificial leaveners (baking powder or baking soda). It is entirely made up of whipped eggs, either whole or just whites.
This cake can be soaked in flavored syrups (try lemon syrup with a dab of lemon curd) or stacked with whipped cream and smashed berries.
Sponge cake can be rolled with fillings when baked thin in a sheet pan, like Buche de Noel's Christmas classic.

6. Genoise Cake

In Italy and France, a sponge cake is known as Genoise. Egg yolks, egg whites, and sugar are mixed together until mousse-like in this dessert. The flour, oil, or butter is then folded in. This cake is moister and more delicate than its sponge cake counterpart.

7. Chiffon Cake

A chiffon cake is a sponge cake and an oil cake hybrid. It has the richness of a shorter cake thanks to the addition of oil, and it's light and airy thanks to whipped egg whites and baking powder.

8. Angel Food Cake

Angel food cake is the lightest of the light, created with only beaten egg whites for leavening and no extra fat. It's traditionally made in an angel food cake pan and then cooled upside down in the pan to keep the light texture. Its high sugar content in an angel food cake gives it a chewy, sponge-like feel.

9. Funfetti Cake

Funfetti is a joyful and fun dessert that has received a lot of love from its fans, earning it the eighth slot on this list. Also, Funfetti is a delightful birthday cake with colorful sprinkles both inside and out. This is one of the different types of cake flavors.

10. Vanilla Cake

Vanilla is, believe it or not, the third most popular and well-liked cake flavor. It's flexible and goes well with various flavors, including chocolate, lemon, and strawberry.

11. Coffee Cake

They're tasty and come in various coffee flavors, including Irish and Mocha. Also, this cake is ideal for coffee enthusiasts as a treat.

12. Banana Cake

The banana cake is the cake flavor that makes you go bananas. It has a juicy texture and an overpowering flavor. This is one of the different types of cake flavors.

13. Pineapple Cake

The pineapple, like the cake, is a beautiful element for desserts. The cake has a refreshing flavor and a stunning appearance.

Hello
My little sister comited suicide on May 10th. She did it while everyone was asleep, and I was asleep in the next room. We had to bury her on May 13th, my 20th birthday
I’m going to therapy, but it is not helping much. I don’t feel like talking to my therapist about what happened. I didn’t want to, but my parents kinda forced me because they were worried
Every day is getting harder. I’m starting to go the gym again, eating and even trying a new job. They make me feel good for about 10 minutes before feeling like shit again. I cannot stop thinking about my little sister. We had always had a great relationship, but we were getting even closer lately
I cannot stand the fact that I will never see her grow up, finish high school, get her license ect.
I’m honestly so mad at the world. And I sure as hell am not going to celebrate a birthday besides a “happy birthday” from the others. Never again
My therapist says I am in denial. Which is true. To me, I’ve never had a sister. But sometimes I have small insights where reality hits and I break down. I’m starting to get angrier at everyone or simply have break downs
Does anyone have advice on how to cope with grief in the first period? Any advice would help, really. I’m trying here but nothing seems to work. Life looks like shit without her :(

for over 20 years i have a weird connection with matt and muse.. its not my birthday today as well, but i also turn 46 today. i wonder if matt hast a special connection to his / our birthday...or if its just a random day for him.
happy birthday to both of us anyway! cheers

Plan: (Majoria's?) Commerce Restaurant Hurricane Katrina Memorial City Park Sculpture Garden Parkway Poor Boys Audubon Park Exhibit at Federal Reserve Sidecar (for oysters) Vyonne's (it's a birthday dinner for her) At some point...buy a lottery ticket.
Commerce Restaurant was closed. Which is too bad, because it seemed like it woulda been exactly what we needed. But she had an early day anyway, and I happened to stumble into another unplanned gem.
Morning Call. Beignets and coffee. It was a great start to the day. I almost feel like it was magic, adding strength and luck and whatever I needed to have a good day.
The Hurricane Katrina Memorial was something I stumbled across in my Googling, and I'm really happy I went. It's just a quick public art installation, but it was an experience worth having. I've wandered the cemeteries in previous trips, so this really resonated. It's right there by Morning Call. If any visitor is going there anyway, it makes for a nice double play.
The sculpture garden at city park was open. YAY! If the weather wasn't so oppressive, I would have gone through it much slower. There was so much good stuff. Some of the pieces were very challenging, which was so refreshing to see in such a public place. The air conditioned pavilion was perfectly placed. Right before all the tourists pass out from the heat.
I got a lottery ticket at the Winn-Dixie on Carrollton! (And yes, I did actually pass by this Winn-Dixie every single day so far) Then down the greenway to Parkway.
I was told that I was lucky to stumble into the sandwich shop when "it wasn't busy". It was full of life. Roast beef. It was as good as I had hoped. I can only imagine what it would be like when the whole place is full.
I'll do the park on Thursday. I needed a nap.
Sidecar was ALSO closed. So we moved up our reservation to Vyonne's. It was so good. We didn't sit in the courtyard, but that must be really nice when the weather isn't like a dog's mouth. The cocktails were interesting. The food was so well executed. "How did you find this place?" she asked. I think it first landed on my long-range radar when I heard about it here. Thak you, Reddit.
This means that bar trivia is back on the table. 8pm at Turtle Bay, and I think I could just barely make it. I got there at 8:03. I was actually a little early. I gotta stop being a slave to the clock. Not stated anywhere is that the winner of each round of trivia gets a free shot. I might be too much of a lightweight to play bar trivia in New Orleans. The people were super fun, and I was glad to support an independent trivia company.
Activities: Morning Call Hurricane Katrina Memorial City Park Sculpture Garden Mega Millions lottery ticket! (we don't have the lottery where I live...this was fun) Parkway Poor Boys (via Laffite Greenway) Vyonne's Bon Temps Trivia (@Turtle Bay)
One last note: I know it doesn't exist, but I REALLY want a t-shirt that says "RTA has the right of way." That PSA that plays on the streetcar has infiltrated my brain. Also, the way the guy says "STAHHP! Requested." on the bus. So good.

We have gotten to the point where we had to Euthanize our cat for behavioral issues and here is the letter I wrote her before it happened.
Dear Little Miss, I'm sorry It's coming to this decision. You never liked me and that's ok but you made your Mom so happy when you hugged her during your adoption interview. You never did it again but from that moment you instantly became her baby. You joined our family with a very important role, helping Gizmo with his grief after the passing of Flora and to be a friend to Anastasia should the inevitable come for Gizmo. Though he only lived a short while after you joined us you brought life back into him and for that I will forever be grateful. Thank you so very much for your help. You were always a very weird cat but that was ok. You loved to play in the empty fish tanks amongst the wood. You even pulled a knife on me once while your mom was away. You loved you jingle toys and only very specific ones. So much so that we scoured the internet just to find more of them and bought MANY packages of them because they break a lot, we still have some in the closet. We have for the most part always had 3 cats so we brought Zoyja into our life from a cat that gave birth in Lowes. You were always pretty independent from the other cats but got along with everyone. You would sit and watch the fish tank with Anastasia or go hang on the exercise bike in your weird special way or air out your cooch on the cat trees. Then almost a year later we got word that someone was abusing kittens by putting them into water as punishment. We brought these guys home with us fully intending to find homes for them but they really bonded with me especially Sophie. You were good with them for quite a while but things started to change suddenly, you began attacking the kittens with an ever increasing frequency. We got you a coller and you seemed to love it weirdly and that seemed to help for a bit but it started getting worse again. We kept you separate from them and rotated you both so you could smell each other and worked on reintroducing. We made sure every room had a cat tree, if not more, that we had plenty of litter boxes. It didn't help. We bought Feliway plugins for every room in the house and did that for many months but nothing changed. We saw a behavioral therapist and she didn't have anything to offer. So we just rotated you guys if we weren't home and that seemed to work. Sure you destroyed the carpet to whatever door was closed but it was something we could live with as long and everyone was happy. This seemed to work. We then moved. We wondered if a new bigger house with an Arizona room to watch nature would help. It seemed too for quite sometime you would still go after them if they were in your vicinity but we had plenty of room for everyone to spread out. Then you started to get more and more angry and/territorial. You started peeing in all the rooms. So we bought more cat trees and litter boxes. So we started keeping you all separate again hoping it would cool you off, but you continued to get worse. You would sometimes attack me while I was petting you completely out of nowhere. You were getting more and more weirdly bitey when you would get happy while hanging out with your Mom. Time moved on and the peeing got worse and you wouldn't eat quite often. You were starting to have symptoms of intestinal issues so we bought you tons of hydrolyzed food to help but you wouldnt touch any of it. We then went on to do steroid injections to help with the issue and that helped with you eating again but now you were even more violent for a few weeks after the injection. We went through this cycle many times keeping you both rotated if needed. But it started to feel like taking one step forward and 3 back. You were becoming meaner and peeing more, you didn't really want to sit with your Mom anymore. Then your Mom became pregnant and had a baby. We didn't give you guys the attention you deserve for a few months while we had so much on our plate. Once things fell back into a reasonable rhythm we noticed you peeing around the house more than ever. We figured that it is a part of her issue so bought a carpet cleaner and kind of vowed to just do the rooms every few months. But you would get angrier attacking my hand while petting you with 0 warning. We decided to try SSRIs but you would ever eat them with any of your food and piling you was such a fight it would be cruel to do every day. Noticed you giving our Son crazed looks on occasion and began to worry. We asked around to more vets and moved forward to try Gabapentin which you ate but it would somehow make you even more angry. You corned Sophie and she left with claws stuck in her face and you would seek out Molly and constantly terrorize her. This is how we got to this point. I hate this so much and wish you could tell us what is going on in your head. You have always been an extremely weird cat who seemed to never have any thoughts going on up there but it was part of your charm but you seem to be dedicated to being a terror to the other cats almost constantly now. You look at our son in scary ways sometimes. I never cared that you attacked me, you always made your Mom happy. Though now it seems like even your Mom doesn't bring you much happiness anymore. I wish there was something I could help you with and part of me feels like this is a way to help you. To help you quiet your mind from all this building hate and anger. So you don't have to deal with these ever increasing stomach issues. So you don't have to deal with monthly car rides and being poked. Or being terrified in cages at the humane society possibly passed from person to person if they don't want to put up with your quirks. I don't know, I can't help but feel that I have completely and utterly failed you. I feel such disgust in myself. But I have to look at everything else too. We have talked to about 7 vets at this point and they all say we have done way more than anyone ever would have. You are now making sure the kittens live and in a constant state of fear hunting them near constantly. I'm afraid you will really hurt our Son. I love you Binkers but I'm not sure what else there is to do to help you anymore. I hope that doing this will quiet the voices that make you so crazy and mad. That your stomach won't hurt anymore. I hope that while I don't really believe in it that there is an afterlife and you are now at peace and free with all the bagels and meat you can eat. I truly do love you and I'm sorry. And hope you can understand that we really did care and tried to make this work over the past 6 years. Rest easy Baby Binks. I love you.
I feel so awful and sad I've had many many pets through out my life but never had to do anything like this before and it just destroying me.

This is my last hope. This is my very last chance that someone--anyone--will see me. Please don't leave me alone.
I thought after eight years I would have gotten used to it. I thought after twelve I would have gotten used to it. As the years passed, I told myself over and over that this would be the year where I stopped whining. But that day where I finally accepted my fate would never come. How could it? It’s hard to come to terms with not existing.
So uh, hi. I’m an eighteen year old girl, and I have no name. Not that it would make much of a difference if I gave myself one. Nobody would ever say it--not in reference to me, at least. The most I could do is stand around in some family’s home and pretend like one of their names is my own, pretending like I can be enveloped in the solace that they share with one another. The unbreakable bonds I can never form. Because for all intents and purposes, I don’t exist.
It took a while to come to terms with. Not that I’ve accepted it as permanent just yet, but I understand my predicament now far more than I ever could. I stated it simply before, and I don’t mean it with the slightest exaggeration. I don’t exist. The world itself denies my existence at every turn. I can’t properly communicate just how much I don’t want to live like this--though even if I could, it’s not like anyone could listen.
But I don’t have a way out. I tried to put an end to things, but the world didn’t let me. The gun suddenly stopped responding to my fingers, the rope untied itself from the ceiling. I’ve never been sick, either. The world denies my existence, and so does everything living in it--so why wouldn’t the smallest, most insignificant organisms do so as well? Viruses aren’t exempt from the cold indifference of the world.
I’ve heard people say that before--that the world is cold and uncaring, indifferent to their suffering. And they couldn’t be more wrong. The world doesn’t deny them their life, it doesn’t deny them their very existence. It lets them interact with everything, with everyone. If they knew just how good they had it, they would be worshipping the universe for all the attention and care it gave to them.
I still wonder how I came to be in the first place. Of course I wasn’t born like any other person--I have no parents to speak of, and if I had been born normally, I doubt I would have ended up like this. The question then becomes--what am I? The first conclusion might be that I’m a ghost--and in a metaphorical sense, sure. But that’s far from the truth, since the ghosts can’t see me either.
I enjoyed living like this for a while. I could take whatever I wanted, live any life I wished and the universe would bend over backwards to accommodate whatever decision I made. But there was a caveat--I could live any life I wanted, but it would have to be a life of solitude. It didn’t matter how much I took, how much I gave, how much I tried to manipulate the world to put me at its core. It would simply never allow that to happen.
I decided to test it out one day. I walked alongside a man in a grocery store, and I figured that even if he didn’t see me, I could get his attention somehow. So I stuck my leg out to trip him--and to my surprise, it worked! I was so ecstatic that I had truly interacted with the world--until he got up, complaining about careless workers. And when I looked down to where I had tripped him, there were a dozen or so soup cans spilled across the floor. I ran to catch up with him, and stuck my fist out in front of his face. But it was even more severe this time--the structure of the aisles shifted so that he was still walking in it, but I was several feet away. And nobody bat an eye--to them, it had always been like this. To them, there was zero oddity in this new world, because it wasn’t new. The universe itself reshifted its structure to avoid acknowledging my impact.
I began to suspect that it wasn’t just cold indifference, it was hatred. Of course it would never acknowledge me enough to tell me such a thing, but I believed it nonetheless. It seemed to be going out of its way to spite me personally, to make sure I could never have a place in it. What was so wrong with me, then? Was I born wrong? Was I a defect in its eyes? Was my very existence so horrific that it went out of its way to deny every aspect?
I didn’t want to keep living like this--I couldn’t. But I couldn’t put a stop to it either, I wasn’t allowed to. I made one last desperate attempt--I broke into someone’s house. Well, moreso slipped in, but that’s besides the point. I took a knife from his kitchen drawer, and pulled off his blanket when he was sleeping. And I took his arm in my grasp--and I carved into it--LOOK AT ME.
He woke up, looked at his arm, and screamed. He slowly raised his head up--and for a second--his eyes met mine. He wasn’t just looking in my direction--he was looking directly at me. And then the world flashed for a moment, and it was gone. The letters I had delicately carved in were replaced with basic vertical slashes. I remembered him yelling at his wife who was screaming in return, both of them having no idea how the cuts manifested. I remembered looking out the window as he was wheeled away on a stretcher, the world worse off for my involvement. Maybe it did have a point, then.
Maybe it was right to forget me, but unfortunately I couldn’t forget myself. I remained firmly locked into my own fate, unable to change a thing besides ruining the lives of those around me. I tried to do nice things too--grabbing stuff from stores and sitting it down by the homeless, cleaning up people’s houses for them. But I noticed that those changes would either get erased entirely or turned into something bad--the food would be moldy or poisoned, the cleaning would have caused structural damage to the house. So I stopped getting involved entirely.
Unfortunately, this doesn’t have a happy ending. I pulled away entirely, trying to not let my presence make the world a worse place. I figured that maybe if I isolated myself enough, the world would reward me for my understanding by letting me die. That was naive. It remained uncaring to my suffering, unable--or unwilling--to grant me the slightest relief. But I had long since stopped aging, so I simply sat around.
I couldn’t possibly describe how mind-numbingly boring the passing of time was. I sat around for--thousands? Millions, billions? An indescribable number of years passed me by, each life I saw insignificant and every planet that died barely able to make me raise an eyebrow. I was almost disappointed that I didn’t suffocate when the planet I had spent my early years on finally gave out. I had done my research, and I knew the end of the universe was approaching as well. And I eagerly awaited it at every moment--perhaps then there would be an afterlife that I could partake in.
…But the afterlife was only for people, though. And as far as the universe was concerned, I didn’t count as a person. The only upside of this was that I could outlive the concept that had made my life agony. I was honestly looking forward to when everything gave out and I could finally close my eyes and rest.
Yet even when the universe breathed its last breath, I would remain. The universe is an odd thing. I've seen so much in my practically infinite lifetime, yet never had anyone to share it with. The universe went through a whole cycle--I don't really know how to explain it, but it seems like we're on loop, destined to repeat every single event that happens. Maybe I'm destined to break that loop. So I had an idea.
The whole world ignores my existence, but I don't think it can ignore this. Every key I push is real, whether or not it wants to believe me. I expected it to shift again to ignore my inputs, but it seems like it forgot about me. Guess my laying low did have a purpose. To be honest, I'm scared. I'm scared that this last idea of mine won't work, that it'll cut me off before I can hit post. I don't want to live in a world where I don't exist any more. Please--if you see this, talk to me. Acknowledge me. If this post actually gets out there, please don't let me forgotten.
Can you hear me?

this is a long story but i need advice. to give full context we need to start from the beginning.
i (20 f) was adopted by my father (51m) whenever i was a about 3 or 4 years old. my biological father was barely in the picture and would jump in and out of my life, my mom (48f) never liked that about him and she met my dad and he later adopted me to give me the father i never had. which brings me to about 9 years in the future when i was 13. i met my bff (20f) when we were in middle school. she didn’t like me at first but we became good friends after we realized we were fans of a musical artist. (Melanie Martinez if you’re curious) she didn’t have a great home life and i kept telling my parents this and eventually she moved in. things were great. we really leaned on each other for everything, breakups to passing of loved ones all the way to my parents divorce 3 or 4 years after she moved in.
my dad was very present in day to day life since he was dealing with a lot internally, which can be understandable in certain situations. my mom moved out and i went from house to house. you’re probably wondering what my bestie was doing. she would mainly come with me until my mom met her boyfriend and she stopped coming with me. i still don’t know why but honestly with what was coming next, it raised a lot of red flags.
my dad was engaged to an amazing woman for 4 years, until he suddenly broke up with her the day before her grandsons birthday party. this was in december. trust me this is important. he says he wasn’t happy anymore and hadn’t been for a long time. which doesn’t make much sense, given they were still wedding planning, he threw her a birthday party less than a week prior as well. the math wasn’t mathing.
that’s when he let his true colors shine. he mocked his ex fiancé for saying that him and my bff were too close. saying things like “maybe we should just get married” and stuff like that. that’s when i told them my truth, that if they ever got together, i’d disown both of them. they got very defensive about the situation. i went silent, that seemed to be how everything went always. what once was my happy life, quickly turned sour.
so my dad is a taylor swift fan. my friends, including the girl, and myself went to the eras tour at the end of june in 2023. my dad was hurt he didn’t get to go, he didn’t help he was a new fan, the tickets were super expensive and this was going to be a girls night. well he gave me a lot of shit for it, it hurt me a lot and he turned it onto me when i said it hurt my feelings saying it’s just a joke and to take the joke. well that was the beginning of the boiling pot.
my friend ended up moving into the room he lived in, because it was more cold than my room. it bothered me but i let it slide, i was going through a difficult time and thought maybe they just didn’t want me around anymore so to save myself, i stayed more with my mom and her boyfriend. fast forward to August 26th, 2023 at about 1 or 2 am. we are on our way back from a birthday celebration for my dad, i treated him to a taylor swift dance party with VIP, so he could sit and enjoy himself. little did we all know this would’ve been the last good night together. i know what your thinking, they died or something. that would’ve made the blow more soft than what i was about to get. that night they proceeded to tell me they had been in a secret relationship for 5 months. so april to august. that’s 5 months after his broken engagement, which ruffled my feathers. i said a few things i shouldn’t have but did it anyway.
i was devastated. they lied to me for months, mocked my bonus mom, and made me feel small. my dad would introduce her to our family as his bonus daughter which he denies now.
which leads me to today and writing this post. he’s been extremely cold to me unless it’s with our family, i moved out and barely speak to him, for reasons like this. now he hates me for no reason and my now ex best friend hates me as well. i had to come to a lot of realizations but i don’t know what to do. do i try to fix my relationship with my dad and get his mind back to where it was or do i say disown him like i said i would? could really use the advice