Clingfilm wank

I've been compiling this for years. May as well share it. One or two of them are just different pronounciations too. I've kept this pretty much to myself and and American friend who I've pestered with questions over the years, so feedback and contextual corrections are welcome. I suppose this is mainly aimed at Americans for two reasons: Brits know most Americanisms already via mass American media, and this project began as a pretty small list for one person. The list does include a few equivalents, ie 999 instead of 911.
There are a few spelling differences which I haven't mentioned since the list would be gigabytes long, such as we (England) write -ize suffix as -ise, and Americans omit the "u" in the -our suffix, eg. "colour".
One more thing worth mentioning is that both parties have unnecessarily strange terms for simple things, so one party isn't more "correct" than the other. For example, jungle-gym is a weird name for a climbing frame, but dodge'em is a weird name for a bumper car.
Anyway... here is the list:
Traffic Cop - Traffic Warden
Sidewalk - Path
Trunk (of a car) - Boot
Hood (of a car) - Bonnet
Boot (Yellow thing they put on a car's rear wheel to immobilise it) - Clamp
Safety-Belt - Seatbelt
Highway / Freeway - Motorway
Lawyer - Solicitor (We say "lawyer" aswell but much less often, and probably thanks to American media)
Gift - Present (We only say "gift" sometimes lately because of internet lingo)
Closet - Cupboard
Faucet - Tap ("Faucet" here can only mean a valve, and even then we usually just say "stop-tap")
Automobile - Car (never ever ever "automobile")
Aluminum - Aluminium
Tuna Fish - Tuna (Why say "fish" afterwards?!!)
Apartment - Flat
Potato Chips - Crisps
[French] Fries - Chips
Candy - Sweets
Cotton Candy - Candy Floss
Candy Apple - Toffee Apple (Even though it's just crude toffee - melted and set sugar)
Parking Lot - Car Park
Parking Spot - Parking Space (Never spot)
Vacation - Holiday
Math - Maths
Diaper - Nappy
Sneakers - Trainers
Panties - Knickers
Pantyhose - Tights
Pants - Trousers
Liquor - Alchohol (Never liquor)
Gasoline/Gas - Petrol
Gas Truck - Petrol Tanker
Drugstore/Pharmacy - Chemist
Large Grocery Store - Supermarket
Counter-Clockwise - Anti-Clockwise
Leash - Lead
(Large Load Pulling) Truck - Lorry
Elevator - Lift
Eraser - Rubber
Fanny Pack - Bum Bag
Bum (Homeless Person) - Tramp
Tramp - Slut, Slag, Slapper
Fanny/Ass - Arse
Vagina - Fanny (That's what "fanny" means here!)
Fag (Homosexual) - Poof, Bender (Among other things)
Subway - Underground (Where I live it's the "Metro". In london its "The Underground", or "The Tube")
Mom - Mum (Where I live it's "mam". In the rest of the country it's "mum")
Sweater - Jumper
College - University (College here is sort of a bridge between school and University)
Highschool - Senior School, Comprehensive School
Middleschool - Junior School, Secondary School
Elementary School - Infants School, Primary School
Kindergarden - Nursery
Flashlight - Torch
Dessert - Pudding (Also "Dessert" here sometimes)
Jello - Jelly
Lollipop - Lolly
Cigarette - Fag, Tab (Among other things)
Popsicle - Ice Lolly
Bucks (Dollars) - Quid (Pounds) - This doesn't really count. It's just a perfect slang equivelent
Barf - Puke, Spew
Trunk (Luggage) - Suit Case
Booger - Bogie (pronounced "boe-ghee", not "boe-jee"... ryhmes with "hoagie")
Boogerman - Bogie-Man
Bug - Insect (Or even "creepy-crawly" for kids in some regions)
Ladybug - Ladybird
Soda - Pop
Bottle Cap - Lid (Particularly the plastic screwable caps)
Can - Tin (For both food and drinks)
Bath Tub, Tub - Bath
Store - Shop
Convenience Store - Corner Shop
Refridgerator - Fridge (Even electrical stores don't say "refridgerator")
Jerk (off) - Wank, Toss
Jerk (person) - Wanker
VCR - Video
TV - Tele
Soccar - Football
Football - American Football
Counter (Kitchen) - Bench
Bartender - Barman, Bar Keeper, Landlord/Landlady (if he/she owns the pub)
Electrical Outlet - Socket
Trash / Garbage / Junk - Rubbish
Junk Yard - Scrap Yard
Dumpster - Skip
Guy - Bloke (Though, "guy" is becoming quite popular in a lot of England. Not where I live.)
Buddy - Mate
Boombox - Ghetto Blaster (No idea what cunt called it that...)
Stereo - Hi-Fi (It was stereo once)
Stove - Cooker
Vacuum Cleaner - Hoover
Construction Site - Building Site
Construction Worker - Builder
Police Officer - Police Constable, Policeman
Air Duct - Air Vent
Duct Tape - Gaffer Tape
Electrical Tape - Insulation Tape
Santa - Santy (Might just be a Sunderland thing..)
Pacifier - Dummy
Mashed Potato - Mash
Lunch - Dinner
Lunch Lady - Dinner Lady
Dinner - Tea
Social Security Number - National Insurance Number
Vetanarian - Vet (I only ever hear Americans say the whole word. I grew up not knowing vet means that!)
Attic - Loft
Basement - Cellar
Tower (Building) - Sky Scraper
Apartment Block - Block of Flats
Thresher (Farming vehicle) - Combine Harvester
(School) Test - Exam (Don't think Americans say exam... do they?)
Oven Mit - Oven Glove (We never say mit... like "catcher's mit"... it would be "glove" if we had those)
Mortar (in walls) - Cement
Elastoplast - Plaster
Cast (on broken limb) - Plaster, Chalk
Twine - String (We never say twine)
Bill (paper money) - Note (Ten Dollar Bill, Ten Pound Note)
Check (money owed at resteraunt) - Bill
Check (from a checkbook) - Cheque (Webster changed the spelling to "Check" for some reason)
Enoculation - "The Jab", "Injection", "The Needle" ... Immunisation
Casket - Coffin ("casket" is only American)
Tombstone - Gravestone
Crib (Baby's Bed) - Cot
Cradle - Moses Basket
Stroller - Pushchair
Baby Carriage / Carrycot - Pram
Onsie / Romper - Babygrow
Pantry - Larder
Dentures - False Teeth
Slaughter House - Abattoire
Dish Towel - Tea Towel
Ketchup - Tomato Sauce, Red Sauce ("Ketchup" is catching on now though)
Baptism - Christening ("Baptism" also valid but less used, even though most know that's the proper word)
Salt Shaker - Salt Celler
Hair Piece, Toupee - Wig (I've never heard someone hear say toupee here, even talking about a man's wig)
Wrench - Spanner
Teeter-Totter - See-Saw
Jungle-Gym - Climbing Frame
Merry-Go-Round - Roundabout (Only the small manual one, not the big powered one with horses or whatever. I can't remember if we call those carousels)
Swing Bars - Monkey Bars
Motorcycle - Motorbike (Never ever "motorcycle")
Cell Phone - Mobile Phone (Or just "Mobile")
Laundry Detergent - Soap Powder, Washing Powder
Clothes-Pin - Peg
Silverware - Cutlery (Silverware here means cutlery made of the actual metal silver)
Dish Soap - Washing-Up Liquid
Bread Box - Bread Bin
Poop - Poo
Pee - Wee
Hair Tie - Bobble
Trailer - Caravan
SUV - Jeep, or whatever. We never say SUV or anything like it
Saran-Wrap - Clingfilm
Bacofoil - Foil, Tin Foil
Zipper - Zip
Mail - Post (Words like E-Mail are making "mail" more common though. I say "mail" now, not "post" because Americanisation.)
Mailbox - Letter Box
Mailman - Postman
Chinese Checkers - Draughts
Fall (Season) - Autumn
Beet (Vegetable) - Beetroot
Drapes - Curtains
Mall - [Indoor] Shopping Centre
All-Purpose Flour - Plain Flour
Q-Tip - Cotton Bud / Ear Bud
Ear Buds - Earphones
Stopper (For Sinks' Plug Holes) - Plug
Winnebego - Mobile Home
Dresser - Chest of Drawers
Tater Tots - Croquettes
TV Dinner - Readymeal, Microwave Meal
Couch - Couch, Sofa, Settee
Floss - Dental Floss
Grandma - Gran, Granny, Nana, Nan
Grandpa - Grandad, Granda
Nanny, Sitter - Babysitter, Minder
Slingshot - Catapult
Purse - Handbag
(Girl's) Wallet - Purse
(Protective) Sports Cup - Jockstrap, Cod Piece
Comforter - Duvet, Quilt
Train Tracks - Railway
Toilet Paper - Toilet Roll
Toilet Roll - Toilet Roll Tube (The cardboard center)
(Sticky) Tape - Cellotape
Photograph - Photo (Never say the full word)
Streamers (Little plastic things that bang when you pull the string) - Party Poppers
Bathroom - Toilet (Unless there's a bath in there!)
Diner - Cafe
Barber Shop - Barber's
Butcher Shop - Butcher's
Biscuit - Scone (A biscuit is something else - closer to a cookie but not that either)
Moon Pie - Waggon Wheel (Smaller and not as many flavours) - More of an equivelant than translation
Night Stick - Truncheon, Baton
Cellphone Carrier - [Service] Provider
Aerosol - (Spray) Can
Zip Tie - Cable Tie
Hackey Sack (The Game) - Keepy-Uppies (Played with a soccar ball, not some little bag)
Shopping Cart - Shopping Trolley
Gurney - Stretcher
Homocide - Murder (never homocide)
Sun Cream - Sun Tan Lotion
Movie - Film
Broom - Brush, Sweeping Brush
Gas Station - Garage
Coal Mine - Pit
Dumb - Thick, Daft
Porno - Porn
Tag (School Yard Game) - Tiggy (You say "tig!" when you tag someone - maybe only in in the North East)
The Oky-Poky - The Oky-Coky
Toaster Oven - Toaster (Never ever said "oven" on the end)
Cab - Taxi (Never cab or taxi-cab. I think Londoners say "cab" or "black cab".)
Thermus - Flask
Flask - Hip Flask
Chick (Woman) - Bird (We say "chick" ironically sometimes)
Shop (Car Repair) - Garage
Chalk Board - Black Board
Brassknuckles - Knuckle Dusters
Rubber Band - Elastic Band
Cash Register - Till
Public Swimming Pool - Swimming Baths
Trolley (Tracked Transport Vehicle, like in San Francisco) - Tram
Ice Cream Cone - Cornet (Not really used anymore.. it's pretty much Ice Cream Cone now, probably because of Americanisation)
Wiener - Hotdog (or whatever the hell a wiener is)
Cat Box - Litter Tray
Key Chain - Keyring
Tea Kettle - Old Fashioned Kettle (Ours are electric :P)
Barrette - Slide, Hair Slide (The first time I heard "Barrette" was 2010 on an American show)
Bobby Pin - Hair Pin
Buzz-Saw - Circular Saw
Zip Code - Post Code (They include letters which is helpful. eg. Newcastle postcodes start with NE)
Firecracker - Banger
Firetruck - Fire Engine
Bumper-Car - Dodge'em
Zee (the letter Z) - Zed
Splinter - Spelk
Drawing Pin - Thumb Tack & Pushpin
Tic-Tac-Toe - Noughts and Crosses
French Press - Cafetiere
Storey (building level) - Floor (eg. "12-floor building") "Ground floor" is ground level.
Stick Figure - Stick Man
Zebra - (the same but pronounced zebb-ra, not zeebra)
Exclamation Point - Exclamation Mark
Parenthasis - Brackets (())
Training Wheels - Stabilisers
TV Show - TV/Television/Tele Program
(TV/Radio) Station - Channel
Allowance - Pocket Money
Laundry - (The) Washing
Washing Dishes - (The) Washing Up (which makes no sense, I know)
Wind Shield - Wind Screen (so "wind shield wipers" are "wind screen wipers")
Road Cone - Traffic Cone
Crossing Guard - Lollipop Lady/Man
Sand Trap (golf course) - Bunker
Movie Theatre - Cinema, The Pictures
Sand Box - Sand Pit
School Principle - Headmaster / Headmistress
Chutes & Ladders - Snakes & Ladders
Jawbreaker - Gobstopper
Frosting - Icing (Cakes)
Bread Roller - Rolling Pin
Box Openner / Box Cutter - Stanley Knife
Résumé - C.V. (Curriculum Vitae)
Rerun (TV Show) - Repeat
Rock-Paper-Scissors - Scissors, Paper, and Stone
Sun-Block - Sun Tan Lotion
Fishing Pole - Fishing Rod
Flea Market - Car Boot Sale
Ant Pile - Ant Hill
Oatmeal - Porridge
Semester (School) - Term
Faculty - Staff
Freshman - No word for that
Molassus - Treacle
Vest (suit) - Waistcoat
Suspenders (that go over shoulders) - Braces
Takeout - Takeaway
Schedule - Timetable
Phone Booth - Phone Box
Line (of people) - Queue
Station Wagon - Estate Car
Blinker (car) - Indicator
Tire (car) - Tyre
Crosswalk - Zebra Crossing
Playing Field - Pitch
Tie (Sports) - Draw
Uniform (Sports) - Kit
Zucchini - Courgette
Eggplant - Aubergine
Polliwag - Tadpole
Bouncy Ball / Rubber Ball - Powerball
Baby Pool - Paddling Pool
Pit (fruit) - Pip / Stone
GPS - SatNav (GPS is the tech, so we'd say SatNavs use GPS)
Pamphlet - Leaflet
Pound Sign - Hash (A pound sign is £)
Fire Fighter - Fireman (Never fire fighter)
Fire Department - Fire Brigade (the service) and Fire Station (the building)
Police Officer - Police Constable
911 - 999 (Emergency services phone number)
Pickles - Gherkins
Canker Sore - Coldsore
Couch Pillows - Cushions
Port-a-Potty - Port-a-Loo
Pick-Up Line - Chat-Up Line
Exacto-Knife - Craft Knife
Can (food) - Tin
Garbage Can - Bin
Oven Mitt - Oven Glove
Doggy Door - Dog Flap
Cat Door - Cat Flap
Lost & Found - Lost Property
Stick Shift - Manual
Eye Glass - Magnifying Glass
Pork Rinds - Pork Scratchings
Styrofoam - Polystyrene
Rim (car wheel cover) - Hub Cap
Tidbit - Titbit (nobody really says it)
Lieutenant - The same but promounced leftenant
Plow - Plough
Anise - Aniseed
Sour Keys - Sour Dummies (dummies as in pacifiers)
Pop Rocks - Popping Candy
ATV (Vehicle) - Quad
Shifter (car gear lever) - Gearstick
Alan Wrench - Alan Key
Hoppity-Hop - Space Hopper
Lug Wrench - Spider Wrench

When I was about 13, I accidently jizzed all over the ladies underwear section of my Mother’s Littlewoods catalogue while having a wank. She went berserk and told my Dad to deal with me. He taught me a lesson that I have never forgotten to this day.
Put Clingfilm over the pages first.