Turkey basting for amatures

Would you take on the role of Henny Penny, Goosey Loosey, Turkey Lurkey, Foxy Loxy, or would you be the Peter Pan Narrator?
I would be Turkey Lurkey or Goosey Loosey. Turkey Lurkey cause the costume is great and seems like the best character to do. I won't be able to portray Turkey like Dorothy did lol. Wouldn't be able to say "Help" like she did. Goosey Loosey for the fabulous costume.
Side note: Sophia annoying. A play for children and she can't help but make sexual innuendos about Blanche and calling Dorothy "self basting". Get a grip woman the kids probably aren't going to get it but the parents would.

A group of us had been selected for special duty in a far-off place at the other end of the Country. And for some reason, I’d been further selected to shepherd our small flock to there. Into my keeping was given everyone’s individual travel orders, tickets, meal vouchers, etc. We’d be flying commercially, so mine to deal with airport personnel, make sure we got to our gates on time, damn transfers, etc, etc. Lucky me.
Why me, I had no idea. I Had achieved NCO status by that point, but I wasn’t the only one. I wasn’t even the senior one. And tbh, I didn’t consider Myself all that responsible.
I Was good at talking, lying, conniving, obfuscating, bribing, and otherwise getting my charges (and by extension Me) out of whatever they’d gotten themselves/us into again. THAT I was good at. Those bast……fine young men were walking chaos. It took up more of my time and ingenuity than you might think.
But this one more minor headache I didn’t need.
Then the skies brightened, and the sunlight it did appear. Gathering at the departure point for to depart, I was delighted to see a SSgt among we lesser sheep.
Approaching his August self, with a happy smile, I informed him of the obvious: “You’re the ranking man here. I believe these belong to you.”
And I attempted to hand over one tan-colored expandable accordion file, flap secured with a string, issue one.
With an even larger smile than mine own, he replied: “No the hell they do not! YOU were assigned this duty. This is Your turkey shoot. I’m just along for the ride. Lead on, McDuff……nice try, though.” The old adage in action: “Don’t volunteer for Anything.” And he wasn’t about to. Smartass.
Gray skies again. But a minor nuisance. Keep counting heads, make sure noone wanders off with departure in five minutes. Tries to sneak a couple of drinks before the flight’s called. Gets to talking to someone and forgets they’re supposed to be going somewhere.
“Let’s go - where are You all goin’?”
“Gate nine’s this way.”
“Gate Five! Gate Five!”
SSgt smiling.
“Are all of you young men in the military?”
“Yes, Ma’am.” (Maybe the uniforms gave it away…..be nice. She’s somebody’s grandmother).
“Flying commercial, I see.” (Well, we’re in an airport…..probably a lucky guess. Be polite. His taxes pay your salary. He’ll tell ya).
“Yes, Sir.”
Boarding call. One, two, three, four, five, six…..”Where’s Cpl Evans?”
“I think he’s makin’ a head call.”
“We been here for an hour, and he goes Now?…..Never mind - here ‘e comes.”
SSgt happy.
“So you’re all flying together?”
(No shit, Sherlock! We’re all Standin’ here together, ain’t we?…….Be patient - she’s just doin’ her job).
“Yes, Ma’am.”
SSgt smiling again.

Earth's orbit experiences an “Orbital Eccentricity”, 100,000 year cycle orbit and inclination variation, going from circular to elliptical, the hemispheres experience more or less sun or exposure to the sun for extended periods, causing ice ages. Scientists estimate we are near the minimum, a 6% change in solar energy. At peak, the earth experiences a change of 30%.
Modern Day Primates, in the wild and captivity, are able to communicate, near and far, using verbal and gesture components, even to other species. Have been observed using wood as tools, and in using medicinal plants to treat wounds.
44 million y a - Hominid ancestors acquire Herpes virus.
10 million y a - Primate ancestors develop genes to digest alcohol.
6 million years ago - Primate ancestors split from Chimpanzee/Bonobo line (15 million DNA mutations have occurred since then; each person born today has 100 mutations distinct to them, most don’t survive.)
5.3 m y a - Mediterranean Sea experiences the Messinian Salinity Crisis, for 600,000 years the Straight of Gibraltar closed off, causing the Mediterranean to shrink down to two inland seas with Italy and Greece separating them. Ends in the Zanclean Flood, a river of Atlantic sea water flows thru Gibraltar and fills the Mediterranean in 2 years.
5 m y a - Arabian-African continent reconnects with Asia. Land based Turtle species start going extinct.
4 - 3 m y a - Hominid ancestors acquire pubic lice from Gorillas (genetic evidence).
3.6 - 2.58 m y a - Considered the Neogene Period.
3.3 m y a - Stone tools found in Kenya and Ethiopia.
2.6 m y a - Mode One Stone Tools found in Ethiopia, would subsequently spread. Flourished to 1.7 million y a in southern and eastern Africa. Paleolithic (Old Stone Age) Era (2.6 m y a till end of last Ice Age, 11,000 y a). Subdivided into the Early- or Lower Paleolithic (c. 2,6 million years ago - c. 250,000 years ago); the Middle Paleolithic (c. 250,000 years ago - c. 30,000 years ago); and the Late- or Upper Paleolithic (c. 50,000/40,000 - c. 10,000 years ago)
2.58 million - 11,700 years ago - Considered the start of the Quaternary Period, and covers the Pleistocene.
2.4 – 1.4 m y a – Homo Habilis (4.5-3.5 feet tall).
2 m years ago - Earliest Hominids start eating meat.
1.9 – 1.8 m y a – Homo Rudolfensis.
1.89 m y a to 110,000 y a - Homo Erectus (first to leave Africa and spread across Asia).
1.8 m years ago - Mode One Stone Tools found on Java.
1.7 m years ago - Mode Two Stone Tools (slicing, hand-axe/butchering, evidence of drilling tools) appear in Kenya and southern Africa.
1.6 m years ago - Mode One Stone Tools found in northern China.
1.6 - 1.5 m y a - Africa, Turkana Boy dies, likely from a tooth cavity infection. He was either 8 or 11-12 years old and 61 inches tall. Brain 880 ccm.
1.5 m y a - Kenya, possible start of Hominids using fire to cook food. (increase in caloric intake, which would lead to evolution; however, Paranthropus Boisei is the local species, brain 500-550 ccm, 54 inches tall)
1 million years ago - Likely split between ancestor of Homo Sapiens and proto-Neanderthal-Denisovan species. (Mitochondrial DNA evidence.) South Africa, evidence of fire use for cooking.
1 m - 700,000 y a - Java, Java Man dies, brain 900 ccm. 5' 8" tall.
900,000 y a – Possible earliest use of boats.
820,000 - 580,000 y a - Durum Wheat develops out of natural hybridization with Einkorn Wheat (genetic analysis).
800,000? y a - Low world temperatures recorded. Height of Ice Age?
790,000 y a - Levant, oldest Fire hearths found. (Homo Heidelbergensis, 1,250 ccm brain, 69 in tall)
740,000? y a - Height of Ice Age?
7-200,000 y a – Homo Heidelbergensis (East Africa and Europe, likely first to hunt large animals with spears)
640,000? y a - Height of Ice Age.
550,000? y a - Height of Ice Age?
540,000 - 430,000 y a - Art: Sea shell formed into decoration by Homo Erectus. (Could indicate when sea shells began to be used as whistles and horns.)
530,000? y a - Interglacial Peak (between Ice Ages, high CO2 content in the atmosphere, 524-474,000).
500,000 y a - South Africa, evidence of Spears. Genetic evidence of Neanderthal spread from Europe to Caspian Sea, Denisovans occupied land from Caspian to the east.
450,000 y a - Earliest physical evidence of Neanderthal.
450,000 y a - Global temperatures had dropped, stayed that way for thousands of years.
430,000 - 230,000 y a - Durum Wheat cross-breeds with wild Goat Grass (genetic analysis).
400,000 y a - Interglacial Peak (between Ice Ages, 424-374,000).
400,000 y a - Germany, oldest Spears found. France (Terra Amata), possible evidence of manmade shelter using prepared wood.
360,000? y a - Height of Ice Age.
335-236,000 y a – Homo Naledi (South Africa, 4’9”)
310,000 y a - Interglacial Peak (between Ice Ages, 337-300,000).
300,000 y a – Mode Three Stone Tools (smaller knife-like, scrapers, developed in Europe by Neanderthals)
300,000-200,000 y a – Africa, Origin of Male Y-Chromosome that all current males are descended from. (40% of males do not reproduce.)
270,000? y a - Height of Ice Age.
240,000 y a - Interglacial Peak (between Ice Ages, 242–230,000).
200,000 y a - France, evidence of Neanderthals fishing. Africa, "Mitochondrial Eve," source of all Human Haplo-groups that everyone is descended from, existed at this time.
194,000-135,000 y a - Penultimate Glacial Period.
190,000 y a - Early physical evidence of Denisovans. (At least three interbreeding events would occur with Homo Sapiens. EPAS1 gene, hemoglobin concentration, Tibetan plateau.)
190,000-50,000 y a - Flores Island, evidence of tool use by the Human Hobbit.
170,000 - 80,000 y a - Body Lice evolve (genetic evidence, feed on human skin, live in clothing; evidence of clothing)
164,000 y a – South Africa, heat treating Silcrete Stone to enhance stone tool production.
140,000 y a - Homo Sapiens found in Europe.
130,000 y a - Evidence of humans in North America. Crete, earliest human settlements found on the island. Art: Neanderthal necklace made of eagle talons. Croatia: Neanderthal teeth show possible dental work.
125,000 y a - Interglacial Peak (between Ice Ages, 130-115,000). Sea levels 4-6 meters (18 feet) higher then today.
110,000-15,000 y a - Last Glacial Period. Grey Wolves would migrate from North America back to Asia prior to the maximum.
100,000-60,000 y a - Flores Island, bone fossil evidence of the Human Hobbit.
100,000 y a - Oldest example of proper human burial. South Africa, Pigment (paint) Creation Kit found. (would cover bodies in mud/clay and then spray the paint over the bodies, sun screen-protection from insects)
90,000 y a – Harpoons.
86,000-37,000 y a – Neanderthal and Homo Sapiens begin interbreeding, based on genetic evidence found so far.
75,000 years ago - Likely rise of Hunter Genotype in Homo Sapiens.
75,000 y a - Art: Drilled snail shells found in South African cave.
73,000 y a - South Africa (Blombos Cave), evidence of Red Ochre art on pieces of stone, stone with deliberate lines cut into it possibly representing count marks.
72,000 y a - South Africa, Beads found in cave.
70,000 y a - Mitochondrial DNA suggests this is when the Haplo-group of early humans migrated out of Africa to populate the rest of the world.
70-60,000 y a - Earliest evidence of bone and stone arrowheads (for Spear Throwers), found in South Africa. 64,000?
70,000 - 35,000 BCE - Neanderthal burials in Europe and Middle East.
68-16,000 y a – Smallpox evolves from an African Rodent Virus.
67,000 BCE - France, burial shows skulls with Trepanation (cutting holes to relieve brain pressure), earliest example of surgery.
65,000 y a - First humans settle Australia.
64,000 y a - Spain, oldest evidence found of Cave Art (Neanderthal hand).
61,000 y a - South Africa, possible evidence of a Sewing Needle.
60,000? y a - Height of Ice Age?
60,000 y a - Evidence of man/Neanderthal using herbal medicine.
55,000 - 40,000 y a - Italy, evidence of Neanderthal using Pine Tree Resin and Beeswax for hafting tools, in cave. (Beeswax can be used in making Candles.)
52,000 y a - Last evidence of Denisovans.
52,000 – 41,000 y a – Archaeological find of “Bast” tree fiber twisted into primitive cordage, possibly as handle for a Stone Tool. (meaning they had access to Clothing, Nets, Cord for Fishing or Hafting tools, rope; thinking processes of Counting, Sets, Patterns, and possibly abstract thinking)
50,000 - 10,000 y a - Mode Four Stone Tools (long blades).
50,000 y a - Australia, last evidence of megafauna. Siberia, needle made from bone found in Denisovan cave. Genetic evidence of Neanderthal spreading to western edge of China.
50,000 years ago - End point of development of Gatherer Genotype (can survive famine), Teacher Genotype (can handle new and different environments, analytical).
45,000 y a - Evidence of Neanderthal and Homo Sapien interbreeding. (Fossil found, DNA tested.) (France, to create stone tools required precision, “Soft Hammers” were likely used.)
44,000 y a - Evidence of art found in Indonesia.
44,000-40,000 y a - Europe experiences cold and dry weather, displacing populations.
43-42,000 y a - Germany, oldest musical instruments (flutes) found.
42,000 y a - Australia, skeleton of man suggests Atlatl use, pre-dating earliest evidence; earliest example of cremation found. Spain, small amounts of Natural Gold found in a cave.
40,000 y a - (Mankind is at the “Forager” level.) Last evidence of Neanderthal. (Inheritance of "STAT2" gene, immune response. HYAL2 gene, helps skin recover from sunburns.) China, test on body found that ate a lot of fresh water fish. Possible example of oldest petroglyphs. Beads found in Lebanon.
40,000 - 26,000 y a - Studying toe bones, showed they became smaller and weaker, indicating shoes were worn. Prior to this, shoes were likely bags wrapped around feet to protect from cold.
38,000 BC - First appearance of Mode Five Ground Stone tools on Japan. (rock was quarried; thin slivers of flint stone, attached to hafts, man is learning the use of a "handle" for tools and "leverage", create Adzes, Celts, and Axes; grinding helps to penetrate trees and was likely discovered when grinding plant matter; found buried with owners; were traded) Lasted till 14,000 BC. (Would not become popular elsewhere until 10,000 BC?) Germany: Clay Figurine featuring human with lion like appearance, thought to be earliest representation of a Deity.
35,000 BCE - Europe, earliest examples of "Venus figurines" found buried in graves (some showing they were deliberately broken or stabbed repeatedly); would later spread to rest of Eurasia. Early examples of skulls and long bones showing red ochre, indicating possible relic worship.
35,000 y a - Germany, flute made from a vulture bone found.
30,000 BCE – Solomon Islands, first humans settle (60 km sea voyage).
31,000 - 27,000 y a - Evidence of Pit Fire (Earthernware) Pottery developing.
30,000-20,000 years ago - Explorer genotype (Ice Age refugees, idiosyncratic, asymmetrical, contrarian mentality)
30,000 y a - Evidence of starch residue on rocks, indicating where plant matter was pounded and ground. (Would likely be the pre-cursor of developing bread from roots of cattails and ferns. Quern Grinding Stones would spread and gain popularity.) Georgia, Flax used as a textile (harvested, dyed, and knotted) found in Dzudzuana Cave. Fertile Crescent, Einkorn wheat harvested in it's wild form. Evidence of man using the Atlatl. Poland: Boomerang carved from mammoth tusk found. France, Lunar Calendar. Likely when Bolas (stone weight(s) and length of cord) began to be used.
28,000 y a - Europe, oldest evidence of rope.
25,000 - 15,000 BCE - Blood Type A develops in the Fertile Crescent. (able to survive Plague, Cholera, Smallpox)
27,000 y a - Australia, oldest example of petroglyphs found. Czech Republic, earliest example of "Weaving" of material together to create baskets and basic cloth. (Leads to counting and simple math, organizing.)
26,000-13,300 y a - Considered "Glacial Maximum", ice sheets extend to the 45th parallel north. (26,500 considered to be maximum glacial reach.)
23,000 - 12,000 y a – Europe, Perforated Batons found, made of antler, assumed to be a form of Atlatl that uses a leather strap or string to wrap around the spear and give it a slight spin, arrow or spear thrower (similar to Swiss Arrow). Right and left handed throwers find preference. Most carved with Horses, have one or two holes (one had 8 holes).
23,000 y a - Israel, Ohalo archaeological site, hunter-gatherer society (6 brushwood shelters, 132 stone tools some attached to hafts, stone Sickles, dwellings showed flint tools were made at entrance, cooking at other end, grind stone showed sand and cobbles to place and had U-shape of seeds around it) that grew/harvested Barley, Millet, Bromus (grass in same tax tribe as wheat/barley/rye, can be used for fermenting beverages, can be eaten by humans and animals), Rubus (same family as Rose plants, similar to blackberries), and various fruits (seeds from 13 different species), earliest evidence for “Bedding” material.
22,000 – 17,000 y a – France, Solutrean inhabitants make use of Antler.
21,000-17,000 y a - France, Atlatl's found in caves.
20,000 y a - Height of the Ice Age, sea levels 120 meters (360 feet) lower. Mode Five Stone Tools (microliths glued to handles, Fertile Crescent). Earliest example of a building/house found. Ukraine, Bullroarer (wood on rope that is swung around to create sound over long distance) found. Iraq-Iran, Zarzian Culture, had domesticated Dogs.
19,050? - 13,050 y a - Oldest Dryas Period, stadial, abrupt cooling period. Sea levels rose 10-15 m in 500 years.
17,000 BCE - Mesopotamia, Wild Emmer Wheat harvested.
18,000 - 17,500 y a - Siberia, earliest example of a domesticated dog found frozen. Germany, Bow and Arrows found. Early evidence of Darts used.
18,000 y a - Japan, oldest pottery discovered.
15,100 - 14,000 y a - Morocco, earliest example of a cemetery.
15,000 y a – Mode Five Stone Tools reach Europe. Southern France, cave art depicting possible Musical Bow, Nose Flute; "The Sorcerer," a figure showing human and many animal qualities (bison), made out of Clay.
15,000 – 10,000 y a – France, Stone Oil Lamps.
14,500 y a - Oldest example of bread making, Jordan desert.
14,160 - 13,820 y a - Archaeological find: infected tooth partially cleaned out with flint tools.
14,600 - 13,600 y a - "Melt Water Pulse," sea levels rose 16-24 m.
14,000? y a - Older Dryas Period, around 200 year cooling period.
13,500 - 8,200 y a - China, wild Rice domestication event occurs.
15-10,000 BCE - Himalayas, development of Blood Type B.
11,050 BCE - Syria, attempts at domesticating Rye.
13,000 y a - Greece, evidence of lentils found. Earliest evidence of Amber used in jewelry. Israel, archaeological evidence of beer like gruel for ceremonial purposes found at Haifa. Likely beginning of Slavery.
13,000 - 12,700 y a - Fertile Crescent, archaeological evidence of man corralling and using pigs.
12,900 - 11,700 y a - The Younger Dryas Period, when temperatures went cold instead of warming from the Last Glacial Maximum.
10,000 BCE - Jericho, considered mankind's first town, is established. Buildings of clay and straw, dead buried under homes. (Would reach 70 dwellings by 94,000 BCE.) Chickpeas domesticated. Earliest evidence of the Bottle Gourd being domesticated and used (Africa and Asia variety). Azerbaijan (Caspian Sea), petroglyphs of reed boats. Starting point of Ocarina type flutes. Cyprus, humans arrive. Germany, Jet artifact (Botfly larvae, which can be eaten). Curved Stone Oil Lamps.
11,700 y a - Considered the beginning of the Holocene.
9600 BCE - Southern Levant, earliest use of wild Emmer Wheat.
11,500 - 11,000 y a - "Melt Water Pulse," sea levels rose 28 m.
11,400 y a - Cypress, archaeological evidence of pigs (indicating they had been domesticated and brought from the mainland).
9400 - 9200 BCE - Jordan Valley, Fig trees found, indicating earliest agriculture since these trees could not reproduce.
9130 - 7370 BCE - SE Turkey, Gobekli Tepe, oldest known worship location.
9000 BCE - Syria, oldest (Saddle) Quern found. Mesopotamia, Copper first used. Bartering of Cattle and agricultural products likely occurring at this time.
9000 - 3300 BCE - Neolithic Era, roughly. Time period of when man has begun herding, before using bronze.
11,000 - 9,000 y a - Mesopotamia, domestication of Sheep; Rammed Earth construction technique developed. Iran, Domestication of Goat (focused on management of the animal, varieties would come later).
11,000-4,000 years ago - Warrior genotype (farmers, soldiers, inventors); Nomad genotype (life upon a horse, can handle different environments, good immune system)
11 or 10,000 y a - Last Ice Age ends.
8800 BCE - Emmer Wheat spreads beyond the Levant.
8700 BCE - Iraq, Copper pendant.
8500 BCE - Domestication of Barley. Domestication of peas occurs around this time. Turkey, Beer production found at Gobekli Tepe. Domestication of Cattle from the Aurochs (two separate populations, one in Mesopotamia [pop. 80], the other Pakistan). (Rendering cattle bones into Tallow allows for the creation of Candles. Beeswax also used.) Oregon, oldest pair of shoes found made from bark twine. Oats possibly start to be harvested, crop mirrors wheat (is like a weed).
8400 BCE – Cyprus, earliest dug Water Well (26 ft).
10,300 - 8,700 y a - China, Millet harvested.
10,200 - 9,500 y a - Emmer Wheat domesticated(?).
10,000 - 7,000 y a - Archaeological evidence of boats.
8000 BCE (10,000 years ago) – Genetic evidence of breeding Pigeons. Palestine, archaeological evidence of pastoralism. Pre-Pottery Neolithic people in the Fertile Crescent form perfectly smooth stone vases. Iran, Goat domestication. Believed to be when primitive dairy-cheese making began. Flax cultivation. China, Quern Grinding Stones. England, Antler used in headdress costume.
9,500 y a - Cyprus, earliest evidence of cat domestication. SE Anatolia, cold-working, annealing, smelting, lost wax casting of Copper.
7570 BCE – Indus Valley, Lapis Lazuli artifacts.
7500 - 5700 BCE - Anatolia, Catal Hoyuk develops as a spiritual center, found many clay figurines and impressions (feminine, phallic, hunting).
7400 BCE - A monolith ends up submerged in the Straight of Sicily.
7176 B.C. – Earth hit by one of the most massive Solar Storms from the sun ever recorded (visible at night with the magnetic field interaction).
7000 BCE - Archaeological evidence for pastoralism in Africa. China: evidence of mead (honey, rice, water fermented) in pottery; evidence of musical instruments. India, first archaeological evidence of Dance (cave art); evidence of dentistry. Armenian Highlands, art depictions of Cymbals. Durum Wheat made thru artificial selection in Europe and Near East. Greece, earliest evidence of grain silos. Turkey, Catal Hoyuk, art depiction of a Slinger. Afghanistan, Lapis Lazuli mined and traded to Indus and Mesopotamia societies. Europe, Cave Wall art of Honey Collecting.
7000 - 6600 BCE - China, domestication of Soy beans.
7000 - 6000 BCE - Turkey, domestication of Bitter Vetch. (Too bitter for human consumption without being boiled several times, has been found to be great for cattle feed.)
6500-3800 BCE - Ubaid Period (Mesopotamian citystates rise, evidence of specialized workers, evidence of taxation)
6500 BCE - Turkey, evidence of lead smelting at Catal Hoyuk. (Wrapping the dead in textiles, too.) China, archaeological evidence of Silk. Kosovo, oldest Ocarina found in Europe.
8,200 - 7,600 y a - Sea levels rise rapidly. Linked to North American great fresh water lake (Agassiz, Ojibway) sudden draining into Atlantic Ocean. 8,400 y a?
6050 BCE - Moldova, evidence of man extracting salt from a natural spring.
8,000 y a - Western Europe, white skin first appears. Iran: earliest evidence of irrigation; man starts choosing sheep for their wooliness, not just meat and skin (2-3,000 years later, would start wearing wool). Georgia, earliest evidence of wine. Spain, cave painting shows people collecting honey from a wild hive, using a container to hold. China, Buckwheat cultivated (near Tibetan plateau), possible first example of Influenza. Earliest evidence of the Ard Plow used (castrating bulls to train 4 years to become Draft Oxen, also means they can be used to haul logs thru and from forests). Mediterranean, Broad (Fava) Beans, Broccoli. Portugal: Almendres Cromlech, begins, aligned to equinox and solstice, occupied for 2,000 years, would become largest complex in Iberian peninsula, equal to other large complexes in Europe. Anatolia: Obsidian polished into mirrors. Spelt Wheat appears. First Stone hafted Axes. Earliest evidence of “Cock Fighting” game fowl. (Iraq, Kiln.)
6000 - 3500 BC - Mesopotamia (Sumer), Poppy domesticated.
7,8-5,000 y a - SE Turkey, Einkorn Wheat grown and domesticated.
5600 BCE - Evidence of The Black Sea Flood, turning the fresh water lake into a salt water sea, rose shorelines and displaced populations (source of flood myths in religions).
7500 y a - Earth experiences a cold climate period? Lasts for 500 or more years.
7500 y a - Earliest example of chickpeas being used. Poland, archaeological evidence of cheese making. Ukraine, Romania, earliest examples of traps used for hunting. Pakistan, evidence of Cotton found in copper beads. Egypt, earliest Combs found (placing a leaf in the teeth can create a primitive sound instrument).
5500-5000 BCE - Serbia, Copper Smelting.
5200 - 4700 BCE - Iran, earliest evidence of a wheel, for pottery, made of stone or clay.
7,000 y a - Earliest example of Dolmen, single chamber tomb, consists of two stones supporting another on top (table design), found in western Europe, would spread and be common 4000 - 3000 BCE in Europe. Iranian plateau, evidence of Bronze made with naturally occurring arsenic. Tin would replace as the major ingredient (and releasing non-toxic vapors) in the late 3000 BCE period. Iran, evidence of wine found, using sealed containers. China, Hemp domestication (smoking was likely cause for spread, Iron Age would use for production); Rammed Earth construction technique, Silkworm domestication begins. Egypt, Badarian culture starts farming, used boomerangs. Roundels, circular enclosure often with entrances aligned to solstice, would be constructed in Central Europe (Germany, 120-150 altogether). Siberia, oldest carpet found (likely a funeral gift, from Armenia, featured griffons). Mesopotamia: first use of Stamp Seals for government purposes; Rotary Quern milling stones are introduced. Armenia: possible origin of Apricots. Lake Zurich, cultivation of Pear. Indus Valley Civilization, using Bitumen aka Asphalt for waterproofing (a basket), adhesive. Bulgaria, Turquoise beads.
6950 - 6440 y a - Papua New Guinea, cultivation of Taro and Yam.
4800 BCE - Egypt, early evidence of peas being grown. Cairn of Barnenez, Brittany, England, begins (burial monument and later bronze age use, considered one of the oldest and largest man made structures).
4700 - 4200 BCE - The town of Solnitstata, considered the oldest known settlement in Europe. Built around a salt deposit.
6,500 y a - Croatia, earliest example of an oven found. Slovenia, dental filling made with beeswax. Indus Valley, irrigation. Wine production reaches Greece. Carnac Stones, Brittany, France; would become large complex of standing stones, menhirs, domens, tumuli (burial mounds, with passage tombs), large rectangle formed by stone. Americas: various tribes domesticated “chili peppers.” Bulgaria, Carnelian beads. Manufactured Red Pottery Oil Lamps.
4500-4000 BCE - China, Investment Casting develops.
4200 - 4000 BCE - Mesopotamia develops true, easy to spin pottery wheels.
6,000 y a - Earth experiences a cold climate period? (Starting maybe 500 years earlier and ending 500 years later.)
4000 BCE - (Mankind has achieved “Farmer status.”) (Thought to be when Cattle were turned into Oxen for Draft Animal purposes.) Egyptians start building big Brick structures; manufacturing Papyrus; Gold artifacts; (domesticated Donkeys?). Earliest examples of Kilns. NE Italy, archaeological find of Appleseeds. Sicily, evidence of wine found. Ukraine, Kazakhstan, Horse domestication begins (they became small and varied in size as compared to their wild ancestors). “Pontic Language Explosion”. [People from north of the Caspian and Black Seas migrated around Eurasia, ancestor of western languages. (shared origins with: milk, horses, sheep, cattle, pigs, goats, grain, copper, carts, yoke, weaving, mead; patrilineal clans)]. Earliest examples of Viticulture (wine making). Levant, earliest examples of harvesting Olives; start using grain Silos. Art: Earliest depiction of Shoes, Sandals. China: example of a Loom for Silk production; Ramie (similar to flax, requires chemical processing, not as popular, believed to be used for Egyptian mummy wraps). Persia (Iran), Mung Bean domestication?, Chang (precursor to Harp) found on artwork, made with sheep guts. Mesopotamia: Stamp Seals come into use; Mirrors made of Copper; 30-40% of animal bones in settlements were pork (understood to be a way of removing trash from community, easy to feed and raise many); Uruk clay tablet describes two temples owning a herd of 95 pigs to be rendered into soap to clean linen; clay pipes for sewage. Europe, farming reaches northern regions. Anatolia, Silver production.
4000 - 1000 BCE - Ethiopia, Teff is discovered (can feed people and livestock, building material).
3800 - 3500 BCE - Czech Republic, possible evidence of earliest plowed fields.
5,700 y a - Lolland Island, a blue eyed, dark haired, dark skin woman spits out some Birch Bark gum; oldest complete human genome extracted; had Mononucleosis ("kissing disease"). Possible archeological evidence of pit traps used for migrating animal hunting.
3630 BCE - Oldest example of silk fabric found.
3600 BCE – Pork bones in settlements (Levant, Mesopotamia) dropped to 16-30% of total livestock.
5,500 - 4,700 y a - Georgia, tomb found had honey remains on pottery. (This culture could identify Linden, Berry, and Meadow-Flower varieties.)
3500 BCE - City of Uruk: (Mesopotamia) begins outward expansion and influence, later first example of organized warfare (would influence Egyptians to start building pyramids); "Cylinder Seals," a type of noble seal, that can be rolled unto wet clay (would be popular until 1000 BCE). Iraq, Kish Tablet, considered to represent the early transition from pictographic to cuneiform. Mesopotamia, earliest Harps and Lyres found; Gold artifacts. Modern humans settle the western coast of Europe, hunter-gatherers. Egyptians show Cat domestication; Gold Smelting; used a vertical Gnomon as a primitive Sundial? Iran, Beer made from Barley. Armenia, earliest Leather Shoe found. China, Pottery in shape of silkworm indicates earliest example of Sericulture (silk worm production).
3500 - 3350 BCE – Mesopotamia, earliest evidence of wheeled vehicles. Indus Valley civilization uses Stamp Seals with a type of script.
3400 BCE (5,400 years ago) - First metal casting. France, Cow skull showing Trepanation found.
5,400 -5,100 y a - Itzi the Iceman dies in the mountains of Northern Italy. Had a copper axe. Earliest evidence of tattoos. Shoes made from two types of animal skin (bear and deer). Arsenic residue in his hair.
3300 BCE - Egypt, tomb paintings show people Dancing. Indus Valley, develop Sanitation.
3200 BCE - Examples of using symbols to represent real life objects (would go to form written language). Ireland, construction begins on Newgrange, largest passage tomb in Europe, aligned to winter solstice. Egypt, Bead made of Meteoric Iron found.
3100 - 2900 BCE - Jemdet Nasr period (following fall of Uruk) would be known as establishing Cuneiform as a proper language.
3100 BCE - Upper and Lower Egypt unified. Mesopotamia, likely evidence of the earliest Lute type device.
3000 BCE - Onset of Bronze. Mesopotamia, Irrigation; Glass Beads appear (possible side effect of making metal); possible earliest Iron working (required higher temperatures), cuneiform mention of Pigeons. Sumer, Medical text found on tablet, believed oldest ever found. Egypt, Hieroglyphs of Pigeons and use of Homing Pigeons for message delivery, first record of a Doctor named, Imhotep; Antimony harvested from rock and made into eye makeup; earliest evidence of domestic Donkeys in the south. Egyptian Mummies show evidence of Smallpox (deathrate 30% especially among babies, can leave people blind). Dromedary Camels likely domesticated in Somalia at this time. (Camel hair can be harvested for shelter and clothing, outer guard hairs make for water proof coats. Camel milk readily turns into yogurt. To turn into butter requires a clarifying agent and extended process.) Chicken reaches Europe from Asia. England, earliest Stone Circles found. Slovakia, Romania, earliest chainmail found. Sheep chosen for wooly coat, not long hair. China, Clay Bells found. India, River Buffalo domesticated (water buffalo); Jute grown for fiber (burlap). Northern Iran, earliest examples of Trumpets. SE Asia, earliest records of Radish. Pakistan, Terracota female figurines.
2800 BCE - Solid evidence of plowed fields. China, Copper smelting discovered. Babylon, evidence of manufacture of soap like substance.
2700 BCE - Chinese treatise on health. 40 kinds identified.
2650 BCE - Egypt, dental work found.
2630-10 BCE - Egypt, Pyramid of Djoser constructed by Imhotep, considered first.
2600 BCE – Egypt, domestication of Honey Bee complete.
2600 - 1900 BCE - Indus Valley, Stoneware Pottery (meaning fired at 1000 degrees Celsius), would become a major industry; (Ivory?).
2580-50 BCE – Egypt, creates first true Ocean Dock for sea trading vessels (with Indus Valley).
2560 BCE - Great Pyramid of Giza completed.
2500 BCE - Evidence of The Amber Road, trade route from the Baltic Sea to Mediterranean Sea. E Iran, Bactrian Camels domesticated. Iraq, "Lyres of Ur," considered world's oldest stringed instruments. Peru, oldest Sling ever found. Egypt, earliest depiction of a Khopesh (sword). Sumerian Clay Tablet with instructions for manufacturing soap (heating mixture of oil and wood ash, earliest record chemical reaction, used for washing woolen clothing). China, axes with Corundum (precious stone). Harappan Culture of Indus Valley, chicken used for Cock Fighting, not food.
2500 - 2000 BCE - Mali, domestication of Pearl Millet. Turkey, Meteoric Iron dagger.
2400 BCE - Sumer, description of Prostitution and a Brothel-Temple to Fertility Goddess.
2300 BCE - Mesopotamia, Urukagina of Lagash, considered the earliest Law Code. (Widows and orphans exempt from taxes, state pays for funeral expenses, the rich must pay in silver and cannot force the poor against will, checked power of priests, protect from usury, abolished polyandry). Iran, Quince (fruit). China, oldest Gnomon (painted stick that casts a shadow for sundial purpose).
2200 BCE - China, first known tax, using salt. Iraq, tablet reads “22 jars of Pig Fat” (each jar 18 liters of Lard, 396 liters total, require 45 adult pigs; likely used to make soap to clean wool of sheep before turning them into textiles)
2200-2000 BCE - Turkey, Iron Smelting.
2100 - 2050 BCE - City of Ur: Earliest written Code of Law discovered. References Butter. (Fines for bodily harm, references murder, robbery, adultery, rape. Two classes of people: free and slave.)
4000 - 3000 y a - Mesopotamia, earliest Scissors (shear, spring type). India, Mung Bean domesticated.
2000 BCE - Murals show horses pulling chariots. Horses become common in western Europe. England, Great Orme Mine started, would become largest copper mine in region (most productive between 1700 - 1400 BCE), used bone and stone tools. China, Bells made out of metal (Bellfounding); domestication of the Swamp Buffalo (water buffalo). Ghana, earliest evidence of Cowpea (black eyed pea). India, Canola/Rapeseed; Diamonds being used to drill beads. Egypt, Lupin Beans. Greece, Kale grown.
1900 BCE – Homing Pigeons used for warfare.
1800 BCE - Egypt, medical text on gynecological issues; Safflower for pigment. India, Iron working.
1754 BCE - Code of Hammurabi (recognized Prostitution and gave women protection and inheritance; theorized that a fertility goddess had a temple that offered sex workers).
1700 - 1200 BCE - (Late Bronze Age) 8 societies in Middle East: Aegean, Egyptian, Hittite, Canaanite, Cypriot, Mitanni, Assyrian, Babylonian. Considered a "globalized world system." Next time this would occur is today.
1700 BCE – Mesopotamia: The "Mari Letters" reference Minoan society, King Hammurabi; clay tablets list Trigonometry Tables and Applied Geometry (for land ownership, speculated to aid in construction).
1628 BCE - Island of Thera/Santorini experiences huge volcanic eruption, possibly causing a tsunami thru eastern Mediterranean.
1600-1500 BCE - Greece, Helmet formed of boar tusks found.
1600 BCE – Levant, Mesopotamia, Pork bones rarely found in settlements (banned from temples in Anatolia, Mesopotamia, Egypt). (Found amongst the poor classes, difficult to tax since it did not produce wool or milk or could plow a field.)
1550 BCE – Papyrus Ebers, Egyptian medical text, mentions Chlamydia.
1500 BCE - Modern Trumpet design found in eastern Mediterranean. India, Pigeon Pea domesticated. Egypt, Mercury found in tombs; archaeologists find earliest Sundials; Emerald mines. China, Water Clocks.
1400 BCE - Syria, Hurrian Songs, cuneiform music tablet in Ugarit. Greece, oldest body armor found, made of bronze, Dendra Panoply (not actually worn, more of a showpiece, but clear representation of body armor for battle). China, Meteoric Iron axeheads. Art representation of Scale Mail in Egypt. Art: representation of Shields.
1350 BCE - Turkey, Hittites chronicle Egyptian prisoners of war bringing "the plague.”
1300 BCE - Uluburun Shipwreck, off coast of Turkey, had 300 sixty pound copper ingots (10 tons), 1 ton of tin, and tin objects and ingots of colored glass (blue, rose, brown). From Cypress/Minoa.
1300? - 900? BCE - Eastern Mediterranean experiences a 300? year drought. (Could also be: Cypress 1200- 850. Syria 1250-1187. Galilee 1250-1100)
1279 BCE - Battle of Qadesh (Egypt vs Hittites).
1200 BCE (3,200 years ago) - Onset of Iron smelting. Earliest Camel saddles appear. Last appearance of Megaliths. India, earliest evidence of Firewalking.
1200 BCE - Eastern Mediterranean civilization collapse. Drought in Greece. Earthquake series.
1188-1177 BCE - Egypt suffers invasions from "The Sea People."
1185 BCE - Syria, Ugarit Letter, Famine.
1140? BCE - Ramses 6th, mummy found to have Smallpox. No record of people dying from Smallpox.
1100 BCE - Phoenicians establish nation. Europe, Iron Age.
1100? BCE - Earth experiences a cold temperature period?
1100-750 BCE - Egypt, Iron Smelting.
1070 BCE - Egyptian mummy found with Silk in hair, earliest evidence of Silk Road.
1000 BCE - Early Cuneiform script (late stages, still pictograph in nature). Bactria, Barbat (primitive lute). Egypt, Kenaf is grown for fibers, leaves can be eaten by animals and humans (similar to Jute and Hemp; rope, rough fabric, sails). Mediterranean, Cabbage domesticated. China, Iron Age. Sport: racing Homing Pigeons.
930 BCE - Camel bones found in Arabian peninsula. Jordan, earliest Bloomery for Iron working found.
800 - 600 BCE - Ethiopia, Sorghum Wheat begins to be harvested.
800 BCE - Considered the beginning of Ancient Greece, after the Mycenae Civilization. China, Bloomeries used.
700-500 BCE - The Illiad orally composed. India, Diamond mining starts.
708 BCE – Greece, Olympics, Discus Throw.
700 BCE - Turkey, first Coins in Lydia. Assyria, first equipment recognized as a Saddle for a Horse.
660 BCE – Massive Solar Storm hits Earth.
600 BCE - Earliest example of a Steel Sword.
600-400 BCE - Ancient Greece rise of scientific inquiry and philosophy
550 BCE - The Illiad written down.
540 BCE – Sri Lanka, earliest record of Pearls.
500 BCE - Camels used in warfare. Persians use kettle drums for military maneuvers, frighten enemies. Greece, Grape Syrup, early form of sweetener and preservative; earliest written mention of what could be Influenza. Blackberries consumed around Europe. Spain, Disk Quern developed. India, Cholera described in Sanskrit. Romans manufacture dipped Candles.
430 BCE – Athens, Typhoid Fever outbreak during siege by Sparta.
400 BCE - The "Celts/Gaeil" settle Ireland. Greece, the “Hippocratic Corpus” seventy collected medical texts, mentions Pneumonia, Meningitis, Valerian Root.
396 BCE - Olympics, horn blowing competitions.
314 BCE - China, first mention of Sweet Orange.
298 BCE - Foot powered Loom.
200 BCE - China starts making paper.

I(23f) have been with my partner(31f) now for a little over a year. We both use they/them pronouns so not sure if putting f is even accurate but idk. This is a long one, so get your popcorn or snacks and read on.
Last night, my partner and I were watching "Love on the Spectrum: Australia" and one of the people on there talked about whether or not they wanted kids. My partner looks at me and says "I want kids" in a pleading way. The best I can describe of what there face looked like would be this emoji: 🥺 They talked about at least having 1 or 2 kids.
At the beginning of our relationship, we talked about kids. And at the beginning I said that we could have kids together and we even talked about how and what not. But we didnt make concrete plans. A few months after that, I changed my mind and told them I don't really know if I want kids anymore. I said that I was young and all I can think about right now is starting my career and getting my adult life together. I just graduated college and I have a job lined up 6 hours away from where I live and they said they wouldn't move with me because they didnt want to move "place to place to place". But that could be a different story for a different forum.
But anyways I have a couple of mental health diagnoses: anxiety, depression, adhd and I've been trying to see a psychologist the past couple of months to see if i have bpd. I think having a kid or kids would be so detrimental to my mental health because i see this forum and i've looked through the regretful parents forum too. I feel like if I had kids, my mental health would plummet. I feel like you have to give a lot up for them. I feel like I would spend their first 18 years of life giving everything up for them. I think it would drain me and I would lose who I am/trying to figure who I am. I also feel like I want to do a lot with my life and travel, I feel like that gets taken away when having kids and I dont want to be old to be able to travel.
I think it would be selfish to bring kids in this world. Especially since I'm entering a career where there's not a lot of money involved unless i want to spend time growing clientele which I really don't want to do at the moment. I'm a professional dog trainer. My goal with this career is to do something regarding scent detection training or animal welfare. From job postings that I've seen I'd only be making around 45-75k a year depending on where I work and what I'd be doing. I don't want to take on personal clients because I'd rather have a dog as my work partner doing search and rescue and tracking. My partner doesn't have a career, they have a job. They only make about 45-55k a year. I feel like kids are so expensive and given our salaries, i don't think we'd make enough to support ourselves AND a kid. Plus I love dogs. I would rather have dogs than kids. In the future I want to have at least 3 dogs. I don't think I would be able to afford dogs and kids.
I grew up with a mom and a dad, and my partner grew up with just their mom. My partner has a great relationship with their mom. Me? Well the reason I want to move so far away is to get some space away from mine. The way I grew up gave me trauma. I wasn't beaten or severely abused. But I was given the belt, spanked, yelled at, told "go to your room and don't come out until you've stopped crying", given silent treatment, and stuff like that; I can't really remember it all because my brain makes me forget and blocked out a lot of my childhood. I know it's not really bad, but it has affected me to this day. I think I'm a pathological liar, as I'm compulsive and lie on the spot. Because when I was a kid and lied about a lot of things to my parents to avoid getting yelled at or spanked. I don't lie about very serious things, but little things like saying im okay when I'm not okay and I will avoid talking about things that I know may make a person upset. I don't want to do the same to these kids. I know I don't want to repeat a cycle but what if I can't help it because that's how I was raised?
Plus omg yall have seen the kids today and they are crazy!! Idk if it's just the area I'm in but omg kids here are bad. They are little bullies, they don't care about the earth, people around them, or anything except themselves. I don't want to have hopefully done everything right to raise them right and they still turn out to be assholes! On the other side, I was the black sheep all through pre-k - 12th grade and I was bullied. What if I raise my kid to have too good of a heart and they won't be able to stand up for themselves like I wasn't able to? What if they grow up to be like me? Depressed, anxious, angry, and so self aware and conscious of this ugly world we live in?
My partner is 31, which means I only have like 4 years to figure out my life before my partner would really start asking questions about kids. Idk if that's enough time for me to know by then. I love my partner a lot. This is the first person I've dated that I truly love and want to spend the rest of my life with. I can't convince them to not have kids, because I feel like no matter what I'd say, it wouldn't change their mind. Plus what if we get to 4 years later, I say yes to kids, and then I resent my partner for it?
My partner got to live through their 20s and do all the shit young people do. In 4 years I'd be 27, i still feel like that's too young to have kids. But given their biological clock, I'm assuming I'd at least have that time. Another thing is, I don't want to ruin my body having kids. I already have insecurities with myself and I feel like I have worked really hard to at least start loving myself. My partner said before they would carry if they would HAVE to.
Also, I feel like there are a lot of kids in the foster system. If anything I'd rather foster to adopt. Why bring more kids into the world when there are already kids that need homes? Now I'm remembering a convo my partner and I had a while ago, they would want to have at least 1 kid related to them. My niece is turning 1 on Saturday. I remember seeing my brother's gf pregnant and raising the kid till now. My brother's gf would tell me about her struggles being pregnant. When my niece was a baby baby, she cried. Even when you changed her, fed her, or tried to put her to sleep, she cried. She liked to be moving. So you couldn't just sit down with her. You had to like walk around with her for her not to cry. Whenever my partner is over and my brother is over with his family, my partner does great with my niece. It makes me smile because it's cute to see them love being around my niece and what not. It makes them smile. We've talked to my brother and his gf (when i still had the thoughts of having kids) if they would surrogate for us. They said they would but omg it's even expensive to just give birth like WTF?? Or the other option is for my brother to give his sperm and turkey baste it into my partner.
But in all, I really don't know if I want to have kids. I'd feel selfish if I wasn't able to give my partner kids. They would probably resent me for it. Oh but they said with or without me they would have a kid one way or another. Last night I asked them about that statement and they still held up to it. I asked them if they would break up with me. (because my memory is really bad, i think they said they wouldn't break up with me but i could be wrong). I can't really remember the rest of the conversation because my memory is bad and i think i went to sleep shortly after it.
If you have read this far, you've finally reached the end and I thank you for taking your time to read my post. I don't know what to do regarding this part of my life. I love my partner and don't want to lose them. But idk if I want kids either. I do know that if I didn't have them, I wouldn't mind. At the moment, I really enjoy thinking about life without kids, and with a bunch of dogs.

They had a weird relationship. It was like a " I can't stand yo ass but we gonna stay together" type of situation 😂. Derwin cheated they broke up and started dating other people but was still arguing about who they were sleeping with. Mel cheated on Jerome with Derwin and Derwin cheated on Janay. He broke up with her to chase Melanie and he beat up Jerome. Mel found out Janay was pregnant but instead of leaving, she decided to make their life a living Hell. Fast fwd Melanie and Derwin broke up again, she decided to get closure with Derwin by bringing gifts for the baby. Derwin and Melanie making googly eyes in the hallway while Janay was standing right there. Derwin broke up with Janay again and proposed to Melanie. Their toxic marriage didn't end them. Mel decided to go back to John Hopkins and Derwin finally decided to support her in the finale. S6 Derwin and Melanie still together but he got traded so that was the end of Merwin being on the show. Came back in s9 pregnant with twins and Kelly and Tasha cheered for them. They also ran into the turkey basting chick that basically became a professional surrogate lol. It's crazy cuz Melanie was looking for a surrogate but I'm glad they didn't go that route. Their babies were beautiful. But Derwin and Melanie had me tripping the whole entire show.

[An excerpt from Jane Crocker's autobiography, The Art of The Deli]
I hate the name "Earth C". It's not Earth C! It's Earth! My Earth! The one that I grew up on. The one that I saw the troll empire come to devastate and conquer and rule despotically for centuries. Which you'd think, if I were as racist as alleged, I would hold against Trolls. But no, I'm totally well-adjusted about that. When SBURB ended, with eight divine humans and three mortal trolls, we didn't cast out the trolls in revenge. We didn't force them to find their own planet. We let them live here.
We even renamed the planet itself out of some kind of sensitivity, to not remind the trolls they conquered it. We called it "Earth C". Not "Earth", which is what it had been called this whole time. Not "Earth A", or even "Earth B", which would have been insulting but at least sort of made sense with there being a "pre-scratch" Earth. Earth C! There are only two Earths and we call theirs "Earth" and mine "Earth C"! That's so goofy, can no one count to two?
Regardless, not only did we allow the trolls to live on Earth (C), we allowed them to live equally. The humans generously ceded three-quarters of our home planet so that every race could have their own kingdom, equal in all respects. And I was fine with that! I love fairness! I love how humans gave up most of our land to colonizers, the governments of which are now flagrantly ignoring the treaties that have led to the last 5,000 year of peace!
But then Kanaya started getting greedy and producing an excess of Trolls, upsetting the balance. I ask her to tone it down a little and suddenly I'm Hitler for it. It's absurd. Am I going around rounding up the trolls and putting them in Death Camps? Of course not. Am I forcing loving Troll parents to not extrude a flesh fountain of their throats to fire sexual fluids in all directions in the hopes some of it hits a bucket that then gets thrown into the grub's gaping ovipositor, as I understand Troll romance to work? No! No troll couple is being prevented from basting the mother grub's turkey. All I was asking was to slow the grub down. Give her a break, y'know. She works hard, let her take a spa day. As someone who'se actually been pregnant (unlike all trolls) I can tell you that pumping out even one baby is really hard, let alone thousands every day forever. I'm the only one looking our for the Mother Grub, here!
And this wasn't something I was going to run unilaterally. I invited Kanaya, the person who's been in charge all this time, to my cabinet on the Board of Responsible Troll Reproduction. She would still be in charge, just under me. She told me to fuck off! She declared war over being asked to stop a demographic invasion, which, I dunno, seems a bit sus as to her original intentions. Karkat calls it oppressive speciesism when all races are equal, as they've been for five millennia of peace and harmony on our literal paradise. I think it's speciesism when they're not, and for that I'm apparently a tyrant to be killed.
But even then, I was reasonable. When Kanaya's wife asked me to take care of her secret half-dog mutant daughter, did I take advantage of the baby hostage to win the war? Did I even narc on Rose to Kanaya to disrupt their marriage and sow discord in the rebellion? No! I was a complete gentlewoman, working overtime to help Rose and Jade keep their weird experiment a secret. Did I kill Kanaya? No. Did I kill Karkat? No. And what do I get for my restraint? For my kindness? They murder my fucking father, who wasn't even involved, and kidnap my son. And, yes, I blew up John's empty house in a fit of pique, and yes I used Yiffany as a hostage to get my own son back (a deal they didn't honor!), but if makes me a "nazi" well then it's Springtime for Crocker, I guess.

My Husband and I want to have another baby. However, we thought we were done, so he got a vasectomy a couple years back. We don’t necessarily want to reverse his vasectomy, just get some of his sperm. Also, I’m very fertile as our other children were “oopsies”, so IVF isn’t really necessary. Has anyone had this issue? Is there a way to extract his sperm by doctor and (for lack of better example) turkey baste it in?

Sorry for long story. I want to give some background on myself, so the whole story makes better sense. It is a good read for any one on M&K. It will be debatable for Controller players. It will be a very good read for someone played on both input types.
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There was big debate recently for people using AA with M&K. I heard this a couple weeks ago. But I didnt think much then. But then I kept losing 80% of my CQCs and decided to look into it further. After researching if it is bannable, iif it is considered cheat or not, I decided it is safe to use it and tried for a few days for AA. For a background, I am 42 years old gamer. I played pro level in Turkey from CS beta to CS 1.6. Then I took 9 years of from gaming since I got impluse personality(And recently diagnosed with it by a psychiatrist and I got addicted to things. So I had to sell my PC all together and not to buy even a semi-decent laptop all these years to get away from it. I had some issues here and there with phone gaming, but got bored quickly and never reached to the same levels as PC gaming. My team finished WCG Turkey finals 3rd place between 2001-2004 and we finished many other LANs mostly 3 place. We were called from top players of the time "The Thirds" Then I moved to US in 2005 and started gaming here and made some impact, but language barrier kind of stopped me from being successful. But I helped many gamers at the time and some of them become pro and 1 of them is still an Idol too many gamers now. I played started playing CSGO end of 2019 and quickly formed a full Turkish line up end of the year and we joined the season 33 in ESEA open league. Then we made some name making all the way to advance and played head to head with some of the top pro teams. Made some finals and good reputation. But disbanded early 2023 since there was no money to be made and it was like a full time job to cope with the best of the bests. I was originally IGL of the full Turkish line up first 2 season. But I see the talents, so I demoted myself to coach and we found a new 5th and team even got better. Lets be honest, I am old and cant compete with the young studs. I was good to the point, but I wasnt as consistent due to my age. And quiting for 9 years didnt help as I lost some of my skill like constantly misclicking to wrong keys.
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I played Valorant when it came out. I formed a half Turkish team there and we were playing head to head with the top teams. We made to top 8 in the first major Valorant tournament in beta. All was good until I played Warzone when they closed the Valorant beta and shut down the servers for 5 days before coming back as full version. And Valorant didnt give me a joy anymore after playing Warzone. I never played any other game other than CS in my life(if we dont count Fifa type of games and Football managers). Played Starcraft2 when it came out shortly, but probably 4-5 months after I quit gaming all together and took my 9 and half year break from gaming. I got my ducks in a row in that time frame. I graduated from college. Got a shit job paid not much, but helped me to build resume and 9 years later, I am a Network Security Engineer and after 15 years of struggle financially, I am making decent money to take care my family. Back to the story, I started Warzone, but I was like bot first 6 months. Game was totally different. Especially someone never played COD or Battle Royal. I had like 0.5 KD to 0.7KD first 2 season. Then start learning how to play COD, how to play Battle Royals and how to plays Warzone. I started make some name in Turkish community. Played with top streamers. Started have high win percentage. Went from 0.5kd average to finish with 2.4kd average. My last couple of season were around 3.5 to 5kd average(45K kills and 700+ wins in total, most of the wins were solo, but also had a lot of duo and trio wins). But, as we all know, Activision F...ed up big time. They ruined the game with Caldera. I still sticked around here and there. Still had 2.5kd average. But I didnt enjoy the game. Switched to Tarkov and quickly learned that Tarkov is a game for masosists and I didnt live hurting myself. So I quit that. Then played Apex Legends and made to Diamonds my first season Masters in my 3 seasons. I kept quiting and trying to play CS and Valorant in between, but that didnt work as they feel so slow after Warzone and especially Apex. Tried Tarkov and it got worse after innertia update. I bought the COD for the WZ2, leveled up for all the guns, but I didnt like the game, so I only played 3 WZ games, won 2 of them and never touched it again. Fast forward to 3 weeks ago, I started new warzone after hearing some good feedbacks. I came back as a bot again. I am old and my learning curve struggles a bit when I keep switching between games. Not back to close to 1.5 KD in Warzone. But I struggle a lot with my close fight. I was like terrible with CQC. But I started having my KD go up to 1.5 after trying to play smart and don't engage close range fights. I cant have perfect fights after perfect fight, but one slight whiff and I am dead. With M&K, you have no luxury to make a mistake, or else, you are dead. The OG Warzone was already terrible with AA, WTF developers thinking to make the AA even stronger? This took me to the edge and I decided to try the AA for with reWASD. As someome on M&K for 20+ years, I will tell you, not worth the hassle, at bast, you will destroy on CQC, and lose some long range fight or snipes that will balance it out. The best case scenario, you will have similar KD unless you are someone playing 10-12 hours a day and build that new sense of hybrid gaming(playing with M&K with controller style, but need to develop new sense to use 2nd layer of controls in certain cases), then you can be a monster and destroy any M&K and controller player. Someone plays occasionally or someone like me plays 2-3 hours a day(sometimes more, sometimes less. sometimes not at all), it is not worth the hassle. I assure you, 90% will switch back first day of trying and the 9% will switch back within 3-7 days. The 1% may still stick to it or give up depend on their dedication.
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Lets come to the reWAS features and Azeron: I got Azeron Cyborg. I love this thing so much. It broke one day, and I bought 2nd one while the 1st one was on warranty. I cant game without this anymore. Someone who is considered older gamer, but also quit the gaming for a long time, my hands doesnt reach to certain keys. I cant do certain things like move and throw a nade at the same time or lean to the sides and move at the same times. Also my left pinky is not bending, so I cant use multiple keys with it. Only thing it can use is thecaps lock or tab. I can use Lctrl with side of my palm, but sometimes causes mis clicks. I dont know why it is not bending. I never needed this many keys as in CS, you only need just enough keys to play the game. But Battle Royals, Tarkov type of games, you never have enough keys. So I got the Azeron. Misclicks drove me crazy first 10 days. But significantly reduced after that and almost got to zero mis clicks after 4 weeks. Still had hard time hitting the top keys, but I had easily usable 19 keys that can do most important actions without an issue, then had 4 top keys I assigned to not much important features like ESC, Burst, scoreboard etc... Also having ability to assign multiple keys to the same key was a big plus. Tarkov does this in game. Looks like Warzone does this for controller, why not for the regular game? But Azeron and reWASD fixes this problem. I just discovered that some reason reWASD gives me less input lag compared to Azeron's own software. Just the specific case is slide-cancel in Warzone. It was all smooth reWASD. But I didnt even realized until accidentally I turned off the reWASD and it started feel delayed movement on slide. Then also realized interact button has the same thing. I thought it was the long press issue was causing me this. But I checked and didnt have long press for the both keys I am using for slide cancel and interact. So this was a plus for me and I decided to buy the software full version. One thing I wish works better was using multiple keys better, but you need to carefully assign those as, they may do things you are not intended. So I removed most of them since I had enough blank keys. Still have like 2 easily accessible keys, so it wasn't an issue for me.
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Lets talk about AA in M&K. I decide to give it a try. My concern was if it is bannable or not. But turned out it is not bannable feature according to developer who had conversation with the gaming studios(Listened the interview with a guy for the Finals debate for using reWASD to get AA. Finals nerfed the AA to 35% and bunch of other AA features after the interview). And the software is not bannable for the AA since it is not something it gives to the people, the AA is a featured offered by the game itself. AA was all good for the close combat. I was shredding with it. But I didnt like how sniper felt and how it impacts my feeling of mouse in other games and had to tweak a lot to feel good with sniper and it is totally new experience how to use the inventory and MAP. And lastly jumping with parachute was terrible since you had to have a second layer where you press a button to feel natural to navigate while flying, . It was ok for the first jump from air plane, but then you always jump off from buildings and shit(and forget to enable this on the air, it wasnt a big issue, but definitely not good in some cases). You can make it work out with all the caviats I mentioned, it would require some dedication and could be a while time to get used to the new key binds and somewhat new mechanics to use the MAP, inventory and flying with parachute or from buildings. I could probably continue to play with AA. But it felt too easy like doing 80-90% of the work for you. Especially if 2 guys next to each other, you would kill one and automatically locked to the other one. But the tricky situation is when they are just a bit apart, it kind of fucks up which one to go to. And this is 40% AA on the PC. Imagine the 60% AA on console. So no one tell me that AA is no god like. This shit shreds. I won so many fight I shouldn't have one. Like the enemy already would break my armor, and I turn around and shred this guy like not a big problem while I was already half way wounded before I even start shooting. It has its cons and pros for the mouse player. But someone playing on controller for a while should not have any of these issues. The sniping issue can be fixed with playing with the zoom sensitivity in controller or even on mouse. Also people would say you wont get good field of view on console, I just reduced my field of view to 100 which helped me to win some of the CQCs since the enemy characters are bigger and easier to aim.
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For my opinion if AA strong or not: For someone just tried for 2 days, AA was so strong. I finished every game I played in multiplayer with 2KD+ and 50+ kills every game and some games I had 70-80+ kills(like shipment or similar small maps). Normally with M&K, I would still have a lot of top frag, but would have a lot of death too and I would be top Frager. Also would have occasional bad games. AA helped me to shed the death numbers. Be top Frager every single game and be more consistent. AA is 1000% OP in Multiplayer. Imagine playing with AA for a long time...
For Warzone: If you are someone using SMG and ALMG/Battle Rifle type of guns, they are still OP. Maybe not as strong since any fight over 100meter levels the playing field. But again, at worse, you will be as bad as a regular controller player. And no AA does it worse for mouse and keyboard player on the long range. Because it gives you that inconsistent mouse movement in the long range aim fights. Sometimes, it messes up with your aim. Especially harder if your opponent has head-glitch like position. Sniper felt the worse with AA on M&K. I had to play a lot with 7x to 10x zoom setting in game. I was getting to a place it was usable. But I decided it was enough experiment after playing CS2 with a friend and my mouse movement felt terrible. It was like I had hardware acceleration on steroids. Also I never had long intention to play with AA anyways. My goal was to play for a week and see how it fares to M&K. I can definitely say it is very strong. After some fights I win, it felts like cheating. But I am a person hates cheaters. It was the main reason I quit Warzone in after MW2(dying to 5 different cheater in same game and other games, I would die to cheater or people use bugs (like invisibility hack and immortality hack) or getting stuck to the buy station, loadout etc... I know some controller players will call me cheater because I tried this on M&K. But I don't care their opinion after experiencing AA. Don't tell me this thing is balanced. I am all for giving controller players for some AA to balance the game. But needs to be a fine balance. You cant give one side a basically sticky aim(all you need to get close to enemy character and the rest is done by AA). But why the game is aiming for them? I don't understand that part. Look at the pro players, they can go head to head with best of the best M&K players even without the AA. So don't tell me you cant aim on AA. It can be as good as M&K for the people plays a couple of hours a day. For the console-dads or people playing a few hours a week, the half the AA will do the job. Combine that with better match-making, and all will be good. At minimum, the AA needs to be come to Warzone MW2 levels that was in 2020. That was even strong, but at least it would be step to the right direction. Any person argues that AA is balance is just selfish person no different than a cheater. Using the one feature in the game giving you the benefit is one thing. I would understand it. But arguing that it is just balance is plain stupid. No different than someone using the invisibility bug or immortality bug that Warzone 1 had. Is it a cheat? No! Was it fair play? Was it equal to everyone? Was it enjoyable for everyone? NO!
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TLDR about reWASD: I am not here to argue people should be using the reWASD to have aim assist. In fact 99% of people that will install reWASD will uninstall it within couple of hours if not within minutes. It has a lot of issues to work for M&K and even than, there are a lot of issues cant be fixed. My point is M&K players are so frustrated and looking for ways to equal the playing field against AA. And this is not right. The game developer needs to make the playing field equal. These people that try reWASD and doesn't find success will turn to cheat developers and we will just continue to complain about cheaters. We just need to fix the underlying problem to get to a better foundation for this game.
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In this long post, I tried to give my perspective and hope we this will be a post with a lot of controversial comments and people name calling each other. LOL just joking, relax...
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Sorry for long story. I want to give some background on myself, so the whole story makes better sense. It is a good read for any one on M&K. It will be debatable for Controller players. It will be a very good read for someone played on both input types.
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There was big debate recently for people using AA with M&K. I heard this a couple weeks ago. But I didnt think much then. But then I kept losing 80% of my CQCs and decided to look into it further. After researching if it is bannable, iif it is considered cheat or not, I decided it is safe to use it and tried for a few days for AA. For a background, I am 42 years old gamer. I played pro level in Turkey from CS beta to CS 1.6. Then I took 9 years of from gaming since I got impluse personality(And recently diagnosed with it by a psychiatrist and I got addicted to things. So I had to sell my PC all together and not to buy even a semi-decent laptop all these years to get away from it. I had some issues here and there with phone gaming, but got bored quickly and never reached to the same levels as PC gaming. My team finished WCG Turkey finals 3rd place between 2001-2004 and we finished many other LANs mostly 3 place. We were called from top players of the time "The Thirds" Then I moved to US in 2005 and started gaming here and made some impact, but language barrier kind of stopped me from being successful. But I helped many gamers at the time and some of them become pro and 1 of them is still an Idol too many gamers now. I played started playing CSGO end of 2019 and quickly formed a full Turkish line up end of the year and we joined the season 33 in ESEA open league. Then we made some name making all the way to advance and played head to head with some of the top pro teams. Made some finals and good reputation. But disbanded early 2023 since there was no money to be made and it was like a full time job to cope with the best of the bests. I was originally IGL of the full Turkish line up first 2 season. But I see the talents, so I demoted myself to coach and we found a new 5th and team even got better. Lets be honest, I am old and cant compete with the young studs. I was good to the point, but I wasnt as consistent due to my age. And quiting for 9 years didnt help as I lost some of my skill like constantly misclicking to wrong keys.
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I played Valorant when it came out. I formed a half Turkish team there and we were playing head to head with the top teams. We made to top 8 in the first major Valorant tournament in beta. All was good until I played Warzone when they closed the Valorant beta and shut down the servers for 5 days before coming back as full version. And Valorant didnt give me a joy anymore after playing Warzone. I never played any other game other than CS in my life(if we dont count Fifa type of games and Football managers). Played Starcraft2 when it came out shortly, but probably 4-5 months after I quit gaming all together and took my 9 and half year break from gaming. I got my ducks in a row in that time frame. I graduated from college. Got a shit job paid not much, but helped me to build resume and 9 years later, I am a Network Security Engineer and after 15 years of struggle financially, I am making decent money to take care my family. Back to the story, I started Warzone, but I was like bot first 6 months. Game was totally different. Especially someone never played COD or Battle Royal. I had like 0.5 KD to 0.7KD first 2 season. Then start learning how to play COD, how to play Battle Royals and how to plays Warzone. I started make some name in Turkish community. Played with top streamers. Started have high win percentage. Went from 0.5kd average to finish with 2.4kd average. My last couple of season were around 3.5 to 5kd average(45K kills and 700+ wins in total, most of the wins were solo, but also had a lot of duo and trio wins). But, as we all know, Activision F...ed up big time. They ruined the game with Caldera. I still sticked around here and there. Still had 2.5kd average. But I didnt enjoy the game. Switched to Tarkov and quickly learned that Tarkov is a game for masosists and I didnt live hurting myself. So I quit that. Then played Apex Legends and made to Diamonds my first season Masters in my 3 seasons. I kept quiting and trying to play CS and Valorant in between, but that didnt work as they feel so slow after Warzone and especially Apex. Tried Tarkov and it got worse after innertia update. I bought the COD for the WZ2, leveled up for all the guns, but I didnt like the game, so I only played 3 WZ games, won 2 of them and never touched it again. Fast forward to 3 weeks ago, I started new warzone after hearing some good feedbacks. I came back as a bot again. I am old and my learning curve struggles a bit when I keep switching between games. Not back to close to 1.5 KD in Warzone. But I struggle a lot with my close fight. I was like terrible with CQC. But I started having my KD go up to 1.5 after trying to play smart and don't engage close range fights. I cant have perfect fights after perfect fight, but one slight whiff and I am dead. With M&K, you have no luxury to make a mistake, or else, you are dead. The OG Warzone was already terrible with AA, WTF developers thinking to make the AA even stronger? This took me to the edge and I decided to try the AA for with reWASD. As someome on M&K for 20+ years, I will tell you, not worth the hassle, at bast, you will destroy on CQC, and lose some long range fight or snipes that will balance it out. The best case scenario, you will have similar KD unless you are someone playing 10-12 hours a day and build that new sense of hybrid gaming(playing with M&K with controller style, but need to develop new sense to use 2nd layer of controls in certain cases), then you can be a monster and destroy any M&K and controller player. Someone plays occasionally or someone like me plays 2-3 hours a day(sometimes more, sometimes less. sometimes not at all), it is not worth the hassle. I assure you, 90% will switch back first day of trying and the 9% will switch back within 3-7 days. The 1% may still stick to it or give up depend on their dedication.
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Lets come to the reWAS features and Azeron: I got Azeron Cyborg. I love this thing so much. It broke one day, and I bought 2nd one while the 1st one was on warranty. I cant game without this anymore. Someone who is considered older gamer, but also quit the gaming for a long time, my hands doesnt reach to certain keys. I cant do certain things like move and throw a nade at the same time or lean to the sides and move at the same times. Also my left pinky is not bending, so I cant use multiple keys with it. Only thing it can use is thecaps lock or tab. I can use Lctrl with side of my palm, but sometimes causes mis clicks. I dont know why it is not bending. I never needed this many keys as in CS, you only need just enough keys to play the game. But Battle Royals, Tarkov type of games, you never have enough keys. So I got the Azeron. Misclicks drove me crazy first 10 days. But significantly reduced after that and almost got to zero mis clicks after 4 weeks. Still had hard time hitting the top keys, but I had easily usable 19 keys that can do most important actions without an issue, then had 4 top keys I assigned to not much important features like ESC, Burst, scoreboard etc... Also having ability to assign multiple keys to the same key was a big plus. Tarkov does this in game. Looks like Warzone does this for controller, why not for the regular game? But Azeron and reWASD fixes this problem. I just discovered that some reason reWASD gives me less input lag compared to Azeron's own software. Just the specific case is slide-cancel in Warzone. It was all smooth reWASD. But I didnt even realized until accidentally I turned off the reWASD and it started feel delayed movement on slide. Then also realized interact button has the same thing. I thought it was the long press issue was causing me this. But I checked and didnt have long press for the both keys I am using for slide cancel and interact. So this was a plus for me and I decided to buy the software full version. One thing I wish works better was using multiple keys better, but you need to carefully assign those as, they may do things you are not intended. So I removed most of them since I had enough blank keys. Still have like 2 easily accessible keys, so it wasn't an issue for me.
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Lets talk about AA in M&K. I decide to give it a try. My concern was if it is bannable or not. But turned out it is not bannable feature according to developer who had conversation with the gaming studios(Listened the interview with a guy for the Finals debate for using reWASD to get AA. Finals nerfed the AA to 35% and bunch of other AA features after the interview). And the software is not bannable for the AA since it is not something it gives to the people, the AA is a featured offered by the game itself. AA was all good for the close combat. I was shredding with it. But I didnt like how sniper felt and how it impacts my feeling of mouse in other games and had to tweak a lot to feel good with sniper and it is totally new experience how to use the inventory and MAP. And lastly jumping with parachute was terrible since you had to have a second layer where you press a button to feel natural to navigate while flying, . It was ok for the first jump from air plane, but then you always jump off from buildings and shit(and forget to enable this on the air, it wasnt a big issue, but definitely not good in some cases). You can make it work out with all the caviats I mentioned, it would require some dedication and could be a while time to get used to the new key binds and somewhat new mechanics to use the MAP, inventory and flying with parachute or from buildings. I could probably continue to play with AA. But it felt too easy like doing 80-90% of the work for you. Especially if 2 guys next to each other, you would kill one and automatically locked to the other one. But the tricky situation is when they are just a bit apart, it kind of fucks up which one to go to. And this is 40% AA on the PC. Imagine the 60% AA on console. So no one tell me that AA is no god like. This shit shreds. I won so many fight I shouldn't have one. Like the enemy already would break my armor, and I turn around and shred this guy like not a big problem while I was already half way wounded before I even start shooting. It has its cons and pros for the mouse player. But someone playing on controller for a while should not have any of these issues. The sniping issue can be fixed with playing with the zoom sensitivity in controller or even on mouse. Also people would say you wont get good field of view on console, I just reduced my field of view to 100 which helped me to win some of the CQCs since the enemy characters are bigger and easier to aim.
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For my opinion if AA strong or not: For someone just tried for 2 days, AA was so strong. I finished every game I played in multiplayer with 2KD+ and 50+ kills every game and some games I had 70-80+ kills(like shipment or similar small maps). Normally with M&K, I would still have a lot of top frag, but would have a lot of death too and I would be top Frager. Also would have occasional bad games. AA helped me to shed the death numbers. Be top Frager every single game and be more consistent. AA is 1000% OP in Multiplayer. Imagine playing with AA for a long time...
For Warzone: If you are someone using SMG and ALMG/Battle Rifle type of guns, they are still OP. Maybe not as strong since any fight over 100meter levels the playing field. But again, at worse, you will be as bad as a regular controller player. And no AA does it worse for mouse and keyboard player on the long range. Because it gives you that inconsistent mouse movement in the long range aim fights. Sometimes, it messes up with your aim. Especially harder if your opponent has head-glitch like position. Sniper felt the worse with AA on M&K. I had to play a lot with 7x to 10x zoom setting in game. I was getting to a place it was usable. But I decided it was enough experiment after playing CS2 with a friend and my mouse movement felt terrible. It was like I had hardware acceleration on steroids. Also I never had long intention to play with AA anyways. My goal was to play for a week and see how it fares to M&K. I can definitely say it is very strong. After some fights I win, it felts like cheating. But I am a person hates cheaters. It was the main reason I quit Warzone in after MW2(dying to 5 different cheater in same game and other games, I would die to cheater or people use bugs (like invisibility hack and immortality hack) or getting stuck to the buy station, loadout etc... I know some controller players will call me cheater because I tried this on M&K. But I dont care their opinion after experiencing AA. Dont tell me this thing is balanced. I am all for giving controller players for some AA to balance the game. But needs to be a fine balance. You cant give one side a basically sticky aim(all you need to get close to enemy character and the rest is done by AA). But why the game is aiming for them? I dont understand that part. Look at the pro players, they can go head to head with best of the best M&K players even without the AA. So dont tell me you cant aim on AA. It can be as good as M&K for the people plays a couple of hours a day. For the console-dads or people playing a few hours a week, the half the AA will do the job. Combine that with better match-making, and all will be good. At minimum, the AA needs to be come to Warzone MW2 levels that was in 2020. That was even strong, but at least it would be step to the right direction. Any person argues that AA is balance is just selfish person no different than a cheater. Using the one feature in the game giving you the benefit is one thing. I would understand it. But arguing that it is just balance is plain stupid. No different than someone using the invisibility bug or immortality bug that Warzone 1 had. Is it a cheat? No! Was it fair play? Was it equal to everyone? Was it enjoyable for everyone? NO!
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In this long post, I tried to give my perspective and hope we this will be a post with a lot of controversial comments and people name calling each other. LOL just joking, relax...
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Hey all,
I typed this up for myself to have at the ready next Thanksgiving or anytime I want to throw some poultry on the smoker between now and then. This is just sort of what I cobbled together from reading others' posts and experimenting on my own. Lemme know what you think :)
I use a Weber Smokey Mountain.
How to smoke turkey chicken poultry etc. DRY BRINE the bird - uncovered in fridge. 48 hours for turkey. 12 hours for a chicken. Try different dry brines - applewood smoked sea salt with smoked paprika, a tiny bit of brown sugar, and herbs is my go to. SPATCHCOCK the bird - Before dry brine? After? Probably doesn't matter INJECTING - I don't inject the bird with anything Smoking - Get smoker hot, 300 to 350, and try to keep it there by adding charcoal during smoking process Use applewood chips only at beginning. Not a lot...you don't want to oversmoke DO NOT leave the bird on the smoker too long - it will get chewy and weird Chicken - no longer than 2 hours Turkey - no longer than ??? hours When the breast hits about 145 to 150, OR the smoker starts to die down, OR you start to get temperature plunges in certain parts of the bird, OR you hit the threshold for the bird being on the smoker for too many hours, immediately take it off of the smoker and finish it in preheated oven at 400 degrees. This crisps up the skin nicely and guarantees a full cook. Don't fear the oven, the oven is your friend when it comes to finishing. When the breast is 160 take the bird out and let it sit, minimum of 15 minutes. Then eat! Things to experiment with - brushing with oil/butter after dry brine or as you transfer it into the oven, or spraying with some sort of a baste at intervals during smoking (one recipe suggested apple cider vinegar every 30 minutes)

I’ve had my Traeger for about 3 months and tried a ham, turkey and prime rib. Finally smoked St Louis style ribs today and they were a hit. Used Meat Church all purpose seasoning, 2 1/2 hours then pulled and wrapped in butter, brown sugar and honey for another 2 hours then basted with Traeger apricot barbecue sauce open for about 15 more minutes. Did a second rack at the same time but basted with Blues Hog champion blend. Both were great.