Selena gomez breast photos

Title says it all.. my partner with really bad mommy issues loves his tits and mommy milkers. Literally mommy milkers…
I’ve known he has a weird obsessive breast fetish for awhile but just learned he actually gets off on seeing milk come out of woman’s tits and there a lot of porn on his computer about that…
Some of his YouTube search history was “How to hand express breast milk”.
I have a very weird relationship with him touching my breasts and idolizing them as I’ve found so many images of his ex girlfriends breasts on his computer awhile back so it disgusts me to have him touch me there and for him to have photos of me like that… let alone see him look that stuff up and masturbate to it.
He’s always trying to suck on my tits when we are intimate but it just makes me feel violated..
Is this normal? Idk how to feel I’m grossed out honestly and he’s definitely got some unresolved trauma that’s lead him to fetishizing this so intensely..

taken from this tumblr post; https://spicysighs.tumblr.com/post/718136492512493568/matty-healy-taylor-swift-timeline
Matty Healy + Taylor Swift Timeline 11/7/13: Matty talking about Taylor liking the band and being asked to tour with her.
1/21/14: Matty talking about Taylor liking the band. xx
3/31/14: Matty talks about being asked to tour with Taylor and turning it down. "That was cool. It’s like, ‘We can’t, but that is really nice, thank you very much.”
11/4/14: Matty is pictured wearing a deluxe 1989 album cover tee at his concert in Milwaukee.
11/8/14: Taylor reblogs the picture on tumblr and says they are her favorite band.
11/9/14: Taylor likes these two pictures of Matty wearing the 1989 t-shirt.
11/9/14: Taylor liked this gif-set of Matty talking about whether he’s a dog or cat person.
11/19/14: Selena Gomez, Taylor and other friends went to The 1975 show in LA. Video of them singing along to ‘The City.’
11/19/14: Taylor & Matty making a video for a fan. (Jamie’s daughter Kitty)
11/22/14: Matty follows Taylor on Twitter.
11/23/14: Taylor was pictured wearing a The 1975 band shirt.
11/23/14: Taylor likes these two posts of them wearing each others merch.
11/24/14: Matty dedicates ‘Robbers’ to Taylor. Supposedly he’s done this multiple times. xx
11/25/14: Taylor likes these Tumblr posts. And this picture of Matty.
11/26/14: Taylor likes this Tumblr post.
11/26/14: Matty likes Taylor’s post on Instagram.
11/26/14: Matty wearing the 1989 t-shirt again.
11/26/14: Matty talking about meeting Taylor “I met Taylor Swift, that was really nice.” and when asked about possibly dating “I mean bloody hell, what am I going to do? Go out with Taylor Swift? She’s a sensation, I wouldn’t say no.”
11/28/14: Taylor is rumored to have attended The 1975 show in Chattanooga, TN.
11/29/14: Taylor likes this Tumblr post.
11/29/14: Matty signed this Polaroid for a fan, and the fan talking about the interaction.
11/29/14: Matty says he can’t kiss a fan because he’s taken.
12/2/14: Matty’s mom retweets this.
12/2/14: Matty likes Taylor’s Instagram post.
12/3/14: Matty about Taylor “Well, she’s amazing. She’s an amazing role model. And not only is she an incredible songwriter, she’s an incredible pop songwriter, which I think is even harder. I can’t speak highly enough about Taylor Swift.”
12/4/14: Taylor, Martha, Karlie and others went to The 1975 show in NYC. Where Matty dedicated ‘fallingforyou’ to her. Rumored that Matty missed the after-party and spent the night with Taylor. xx
12/5/14: Taylor likes this Tumblr post about Matty singing ‘fallingforyou’ to her.
12/5/14: Matty’s tweet in response to articles about him and Taylor getting his name wrong.
12/6/14: Matty has a breakdown on stage in Boston, MA. In 2015 talking about the incident he says “There was girl stuff. There was family stuff. There was financial stuff. There was drug stuff.”
12/6/14: Matty talking about a fan saying “I love you” to him. “What did I say to the poor fucking girl? ‘You don’t have the right to love me. You don’t know me. I love you but you don’t get to love me.’ Jesus. Can you imagine your favorite band shouting that at you? What a dickhead. What a horrible thing to say to a kid who fucking does love me.”
12/9/14: Matty at a show in NY “I was sad the other day as someone told me they loved me. And I said ‘No, you don’t. Not really.’ And today I told someone I loved them. And they said ‘No, you don’t.’ And it fucking sucks to hear that. Especially when you mean it. Don’t do that to someone. Don’t do what I did.”
12/14/14: Matty posts this on Instagram.
12/30/14: Matty deletes this Instagram post.
1/16/15: Matty denies dating rumors. Admits they exchanged numbers but “That didn’t really happen as much as it’d be amazing for me if it did, unfortunately it didn’t.”
2/25/15: They hangout at the BRIT Awards afterparty. (This weekend is when she met Calvin and they started dating)
2015: Matty & Halsey date and breakup.
11/15/15: Matty talks about Taylor in an interview “The things that surround her are like Barack Obama. I fell for her a little bit, but everyone falls for Taylor Swift” “The day after she’d been to a show of ours, someone sent me a screenshot of E! News with the headline ‘Who is Matt Healy?’ That freaked me out. I’m not ready to indulge in that world and I’m not ready to be judged by that world.”
12/8/15: Matty talks about reaching out to Taylor to have her in his music video.
Sometime in 2015: Matty & Gabriella Brooks start dating.
2/1/16: Matty talking about Taylor “She was a fan of the band and we just became friends, and we related to each other over how mental our lives were. But when you’re with people like Taylor, there are a million people flying around you the whole time, and this security guard is talking to that guy, and this guy is the new manager. I didn’t like the pace of it, because it makes me confused and I feel like I’m going to miss something. And being perceptive is one of the abilities that I like to think that I have.“
3/17/16: Matt Healy has suggested that dating Taylor Swift would have been “emasculating” for him because of her huge global fame.
3/18/16: Journalist who interviewed him writes an op-ed saying his words were misconstrued and “I saw an intelligent and liberal man wrestling with our culture’s gender roles.”
3/19/16: He apologizes for said comments and calls Taylor “One of the most gracious, hard working, creatively gifted, and beautiful women that I have had the pleasure to meet.”
6/1/16: Taylor & Calvin Harris breakup.
6/15/16: Taylor starts dating Tom Hiddleston.
8/17/16: Matty says he has Taylor’s number but “she’s probably changed her number by now.” And jokes “I keep texting her.”
8/30/16: Matty talks about Taylor on the BBCR1’s Breakfast Show. They joke about Taylor doing jury duty.
9/6/16: Taylor & Tom Hiddleston breakup.
October 2016: Taylor & Joe Alwyn start dating.
10/27/16: Matty about Taylor in Rolling Stone “She came to our show, and you would have thought that Barack Obama had come out. I don’t know another person on the planet that would elicit that kind of reaction.”
11/11/16: Matty again denies he dated Taylor and says “She came to a show and we hung out. We fancied each other, but then we couldn’t have it go any further, because it would be like going out with Barack Obama.”
11/20/17: Podcast talking about Taylor & Matty.
12/3/18: Matty talking about his journal “It’s mainly stories that I write about my dreams of being in love with other popstars.”
12/4/18: Matty retweets a picture of Taylor.
8/28/19: Matty & Gabriella Brooks breakup.
9/23/19: Mentions wanting to produce an album for Taylor in an interview (at 13:48 & 32:00) “Taylor, if you ever want someone to help you set up the mics for your little acoustic record, just so you know, I’m there.”
9/23/19: Matty retweets and tags Taylor in a post quoting him saying he wants to produce an album for Taylor.
9/24/19: Matty tweets “Taylor Swift. With an acoustic guitar. Doing her ‘Nebraska’. Doing her ‘Blue’. Kill me.”
January 2020: Matty & FKA Twigs start dating.
2/12/20: Both attend the NME awards and hug. Beabadoobee (who Taylor is talking to in the video) about meeting Taylor that day “Taylor’s so ethereal, So badass, I was like ‘Holy shit!’ She was walking towards me and I’m like, ‘She’s going to Matty [The 1975] not me.’ And then she comes up to me and I’m like… I vomited in my mouth. I couldn’t believe it.”
2/20/20: Matty mentions seeing Taylor and wanting to work with her in an interview with Zane Lowe. “She was just stood behind me. I mean, I haven’t seen Taylor in years so it was actually a really nice room. But it, unfortunately, wasn’t the time for me to pitch my post-rock Joni Mitchell project.”
10/22/20: Deuxmoi posts these.
2021: Matty starts working with Jack Antonoff on The 1975′s upcoming album.
November 2021: Taylor and Jack Antonoff start working on “Midnights.”
6/7/22: Matty & FKA Twigs breakup.
8/9/22: Matty Healy shares Taylor Swift’s reaction to The 1975’s new album, with her saying “it’s so funny.”
9/3/22: Matty says there will be no collab on Midnights. “I would love that! But unfortunately FAKE NEWS :(”
10/7/22: Matty tweets “You guys actually thought Taylor Swift was gonna have me on her album”
10/11/22: Matty on working with Taylor “Oh we’re not. We’d love to. Love to work with Taylor Swift. Love Taylor Swift, think she’s one of the best songwriters, but yeah, no we haven’t done that. We’d love to though.”
10/11/22: The 1975 discuss covering ‘Lover’ for the BBC live lounge.
10/12/22: Matty briefly mentions Taylor in a Zane Lowe interview (45:53).
10/18/22: Matty briefly mentions Taylor in a podcast (1:22:40) when talking about who they would like to see on the podcast. Interestingly enough her name seems to be cut from the video version of the podcast.
10/23/22: Matty posted on his Instagram to stream Midnights.
10/26/22: Matty posted he was listening to ‘Hey Stephen TV’ on his Instagram story
11/27/22: Matty said he worked on Midnights with Taylor but their versions didn’t make the cut (4:52). “We actually worked a bit on that, but then the version of it never came out.” “It was for reasons not to be criticized.”
12/21/22: Matty said ‘Chocolate‘ reminds him of Taylor “Tumblr, Doc Martens, Taylor Swift, the 1975”
‘Question…?’ Played in The 1975 pre-show playlist. (Don’t have dates because it happened multiple times)
1/12/23: Matty & Taylor before The 1975 show.
1/12/23: Taylor does a surprise performance at The 1975 show in London. Deuxmoi later claims they stayed up until 4 am talking (later confirmed in his profile with The New Yorker.)
1/12/23: Matty “I’m not kissing anybody in front of Taylor Swift, have some respect. in front of the queen? not happening“
2/2/23: Matty briefly mentions Taylor and the Ticketmaster situation (38:06)
February: Allegedly spent several days at a Los Angeles recording studio together.
3/15/23: Matty seen with Ana Salazar.
3/17/23: First show of The Eras Tour
3/22/23: Puff-piece comes out stating Joe and Taylor are ‘great together’ and ‘super supportive of her career’ and will be travelling to her ‘when he can’.
‘About You’ plays at the same time as the Lover MV has been playing on The Eras Tour pre-show playlist. (Don’t have dates because it happened multiple times)
3/29/23: Matty’s ex says “Things were going well until around March 29th then, out of the blue, he stopped replying to my messages and calls.”
3/31/23: Taylor changes The Eras Tour setlist from ‘Invisible String’ to ‘The 1’
4/7/23: Matty follows Taylor on Instagram.
4/7/23: Matty likes Taylor’s Instagram post.
4/8/23: Matty’s birthday.
4/8/23: It’s announced Taylor and Joe have broken up.
4/8/23: Matty talking about love and how happy he is.
4/10/23: Matty deactivates his social media accounts.
4/10/23: Matty on why he deactivated “Everything happens in eras. The 1975 is a very eras band. And I think that the era of me being a fucking asshole is gonna come to an end.” and “I perform all the time and it’s my job and I love doing this, but I can’t perform off the stage any more as I just want to be a bloke.”
4/10/23: Matty says “Hey, I love you.” during ‘About You’.
4/10/23: Matty mouths “You know who you are.” and points during ‘About You’.
4/11/23: Matty “A call for something sincere and direct. That’s what we’re all looking for. That’s what I’m looking for. Maybe I’ve found it.. I’m feeling quite happy.”
4/13/23: Deuxmoi says she got a tip that Matty & Taylor are dating. (19:16)
4/14/23: Matty cheering during ‘Me & You Together.’
4/14/23: Matty “Romance is nice when it works, this next song worked.” ‘fallingforyou’ starts playing “Oh it’s a different song, this song did not work.”
4/14/23: Before ‘About You’ “Ok, this is the one that worked.”
4/14/23: Matty mouthing “I love you” during ‘About You’ and saying “Fuck yeah, I win!” after it ends.
4/16/23: Matty’s “Yeah you will!” during ‘Happiness’ after the line, “I’m never gonna love again.”
4/19/23: Matty says “It takes bit to get here but its worth it” and “true story” before playing ‘Me & You Together.’
4/21/23: Matty plays a cover of ‘The Best of Me’ by The Starting Line. Take note of the lyrics.
4/24/23: Matty spoke about how he sees people listening to ‘She’s American’ in three places: Manchester, Tokyo and Pennsylvania “that’s a whole other thing don’t worry about that.”
5/3/23: The Sun reports Matty and Taylor are dating and will go public with their romance at her shows in Nashville.
5/3/23: Matty introducing ‘Me and You Together song’, saying “I’ve got something real to tell you guys!”
5/3/23: Matty mouths “This is about you, you know who you are. I love you.” while playing ‘About You.’
5/3/23: Matty does a cover of ‘The Best of Me’ by The Starting Line again.
5/4/23: Matty introducing ‘Me and You Together song’, saying “So I’ve been trying to tell you guys” and “That’s right.”
5/4/23: Before playing ‘About You’ Matty mouths "This is why I’m happy. Who is it about? Who am I talking to?”
5/4/23: Matty is seen mouthing the words “I love you” before writing the letter T on the camera lens.
5/4/23: Matty saying “she sure is” before playing ‘She’s American.’
5/4/23: Matty flies from Manila to Nashville. (Which is around a 20hr flight)
5/5/23: Matty at Taylor’s concert. Nashville night 1.
5/5/23: Taylor mouths “This is about you, you know who you are. I love you.” during ‘cardigan.’
5/6/23: Matty grabbing coffee accompanied by Taylors bodyguard after leaving Taylors condo.
5/6/23: Matty at Nashville night 2. xx
5/6/23: Matty & Taylor pictured arriving at Taylor’s condo together.
5/7/23: Matty at Nashville night 3.
5/11/23: Matty and Taylor spotted on a date with Jack Antonoff in NYC. More pictures here.
5/12/23: Matty at Philly night 1.
5/13/23: Matty at Philly night 2.
5/13/23: Taylor performs ‘This Love’ with no introduction.
5/14/23: Taylor plays a request of “Hey Stephen”, but doesn’t say who requested it.
5/14/23: Matty pictured at the VIP tent at The Eras Tour Philly night 3
5/15/23: Matty and Taylor pictured leaving a party at Electric Studios in NYC.
5/18/23: Article comes out saying Joe is ‘distraught and slighted’ over Taylor & Matty dating, saying he ‘trusted’ Taylor when she said they were just friends.
5/18/23 Matty entering Taylor’s NYC Apartment.
5/20/23: Matty’s ex talks about Matty and Taylor.
5/20/23: Taylor’s speech before playing ‘Question…?’ in Foxborough, MA. “I want you all to know that I’ve never been this happy before in my life. It’s not just with the tour, I just sort of feel like my life finally feels like it makes sense. And so I thought I’d play this song, which brings me a lot of happy memories.”
5/20/23: Taylor plays ‘Question…?’ on night 2 in Foxborough, MA.
5/22/23: Matty dropping Taylor off at Electric Lady Studios.
5/24/23: Taylor and Matty leaving the Electric Lady Studios separately.
5/27/23: The Sun reports Matty and Taylor are moving in together.
5/29/23: Matty’s profile with The New Yorker comes out which includes multiple mentions of Taylor.
5/29/23: From The New Yorker “Healy found it annoying that, at a certain level of fame, celebrities can cultivate liberal auras while avoiding the risk of taking real political stands. (Swift, I thought, but didn’t say, seemed to be excepted from his critique.)”
5/29/23: From The New Yorker about Taylor & Matty dating “ Neither of their representatives would comment on the record, but I kept getting texts from people who knew them, and who insisted: this time, it’s real.”
6/5/23: Matty & Taylor reportedly break up.
6/6/23: People releases an article saying “There is no drama, and who knows what could happen again.” and "Taylor and Matty still care for one another but they are in the middle of world tours so both are incredibly busy. They’ve been friends for years and are still friends.”
6/6/23: While discussing Taylor on his podcast (21:06) Zach Sang says “I’m like kind of friends with Selena Gomez. We’ve known each other for a very long time and we share a lot of close friends. And from what I heard like in the aura around Selena, Taylor was talking about Matty Healy like he was the one."
6/11/23: Matty reactivates his Instagram.
6/11/23: Matty “You know what’s nice, playing songs in context“ before ‘Me and You Together song’
7/1/23: Matty mentions Taylor "I don’t wanna use this thing [the catwalk], it feels very democratic, it feels very… I mean Beyonce of course, Taylor, Machine Gun Kelly, whoever it may be… I don’t like it, it makes me feel exposed.”
7/5/23: The Sun claims Matty & Taylor are back together and “want to make it work at all costs.”
7/5/23: People declines claims that they are together.
7/18/23: Matty briefly mentions Taylor “I speak about this a lot, the Tumblr times, the simpler days, the golden days. When it was just us and Taylor and Lana and Arctic Monkeys.”
7/22/23: Taylor removes ‘About You’ from The Eras Tour pre-show playlist.
8/7/23: Matty is seen with Meredith Mickelson at an airport in Hawaii.
August 2023: Taylor starts dating Travis Kelce.
September 2023: Matty starts dating Gabbriette.
December 2023: Multiple people receive miss prints of “1989 (Taylor’s Version)” which appears to show the song “Slut” originally featured The 1975.
4/19/24: Taylor releases her new album “The Tortured Poets Department” where many songs are believed to be about Taylor and Matty’s previous relationship.

I gained 15 pounds after taking this anxiety fixing med, and I feel like it aged me! It makes me more hungry. You know how Selena Gomez keep getting made fun of for gaining weight and swelling on her face? That’s me after this med 😭 I don’t feel as pretty as before.

This is my first time writing anything like this about my life so I'm sorry if it's too long as there's a lot to unpack and I want to just lay everything out to get the best advice to help my decision.
I come from a family of 6. There was me, my mother, father and three sisters. I'm the youngest and there's an 8 year gap between me and my sisters, who only have around a one year gap between each of them. Growing up it was always World War 3 in our house with them as when they were in their teens the three of them shared a room. The sister in question, "Sarah", is the middle in age of the three, "Winifred" the oldest and "Mary" the youngest.
Sarah has always been the least like any of us, we're all very different, both in personality and looks, it's been pointed out multiple times by friends how different we all are from each other, but Sarah has always carried an air of superiority I've never seen in the rest of my family.
The one trait me and my siblings share would be we all have/had put ourselves first, which can be a good thing but can lean into selfishness pretty easily, a problem that plagued my personality until I met my husband who helped me see the difference in putting myself first and being a selfish AH.
Sarah has never been the type to let anything go. She always brings up things that happened when my sisters were teenagers (they're all in their 40s now) along with embellishing or completely fabricating things that have happened that make her out to be completely blameless. She retells these story's over and over until she genuinely believes them and then throws a tantrum when one or more of us correct her. I remember arguments Sarah would have with my parents that always ended up with her storming out of the house, she tends to run away from problems.
Sarah and my mother have never seen eye to eye. In many ways they're too similar, always need the last word, headstrong, never apologizing, the need to always be right and they obsess way too much about what people think (in different ways, Sarah cares about how people/ strangers perceive her and her families manners/ social status and success, my mother is particularly obsessive on people knowing details about her personal life and is a very private person). It's always been my view that Sarah has always lacked my mother's warmth and her honesty (mostly to a fault but she would always try and spare someone's feelings and bite her tongue when she really needed to). Sarah's name calling about my other sisters was always a main spark to her and my mothers arguments.
Her and Winifred got on well for the most part from what I remember, and when we all got older she was fine to talk to. There were even a few times when my father was sick, myself, Sarah and Winifred had some bonding time which was nice.
Several years ago Mary was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia ( severely effects her central nervous system, can cause wide spread pain and can easily cause fatigue) and a few years ago she was diagnosed with cervical cancer. She had a full hysterectomy and the cancer seems to be a memory but this still wasn't enough for Sarah to not belittle Mary and her, what Sarah calls "life choices". Mary has struggled with her weight since she was a teenager and Sarah never held back in letting her know her opinions on it.
It's common knowledge in our family that Sarah has always been ashamed of where she comes from and would always be embarrassed by how my mother and Mary acted and spoke (little filter and Sarah considers this candour and how they speak "lower class" ). Mary has always Sarah's verbal punching bag, both to her face and behind her back but has always disliked when people, mainly my mother, would call her out and tell her to stop. The most recent example of this I was told about was that at my wedding, she made a nasty comment about the dress Mary was wearing. Months later my mother mentioned it in an argument to Sarah that her sister (my aunt) overheard Sarah's remarks and made a disapproving face. Sarah apparently just walked away from the conversation. The next day my aunt called my mother and asked that she "not be involved in my family's drama". My mother, confused asked her what she meant and my aunt said that Sarah drove (1.5 hours) to her house to confront her about it even though it happened just short of a year before.
For years our father had been desperately trying to get my mother to agree for them to move and downsize homes so they could enjoy their retirement with a little extra money but she was extremely reluctant to leave the family home due to a combination of leaving happy memories behind and being afraid of such a big change.
Then one day, Sarah offered to give up some of her land for them to live on as a cheaper option. I think we all agreed it was a good idea and we were all so surprised by what seemed to be generosity, it blindsided us all and we mistook it as her turning over a new leaf. Our father was all for the idea as him and Sarah agreed it was good to be near family in their golden years.
I replay my parents asking my advice on this over and over in my head, as in hindsight it was obviously an awful idea. But like Winifred and Mary, I agreed it would be the best move.
Their original idea was for them to get a tiny home and have it about 100 yards from Sarah's home. Sarah entertained that idea for a short while but convinced them a built small property attached to their home would be better.
The family home was nearly 2 hours drive away from Sarah's home so her and her husband took charge with contractors and overseen almost anything to do with the build if my parents couldn't make it.
The first quote, pre-build, they received was 50k. But in the end it tripled into 150k. Over the course of the build Sarah had changed things, the location of the front door, which was now facing the window to her home office (which is her main place of work), and back door, which changed to face the back of Sarah's house ( I know this all seems like major red flags but again, her and her husband convinced them it was to do with not damaging parts of her property and what seemed like other valid reasonings).
Cut to the house being built, selling the family home and them moving in, it wasn't long until our father became ill. First we noticed his memory wasn't as sharp as it was, then he had difficulty driving and had to stop completely. It was around this time and slightly after the sale of their house Sarah started pestering him for a loan. He told me this himself, at first it was suggesting they bring everyone on a big holiday, then it was saying it would be nice to give all their kids 20k and how it would be nice to see us enjoy it. She eventually wore him down and he loaned her 20k, I'm assuming to get her off his back. At some point after she booked a trip to New York, brought 2 suitcases, one of which was empty but came back with them both packed full. I know it was her business what she wanted the money for but even if it was for a shopping trip she could have had the decency to conceal it a bit better. She promised him time and time again she'd pay him back. He never seen a penny. Previous to this he offered Winifred the same amount as she was going through a divorce and it would have gone to a house for her to move out, she thanked him for offering but turned it down and said she'd be ok. She didn't tell him that it was because she thought it wasn't right to accept money from him knowing he was sick as he was a very proud man.
My father was the best man I've ever known. Incredibly down to earth, very open and friendly and could make friends at the drop of a hat. I remember a couple of vacations when we were kids. Thousands of miles from home he'd bump into old friends of his.
He was the kind of person who rarely got a cold so his decline was obvious to everyone. It was a year of being misdiagnosed until he was finally correctly diagnosed with stage four liver cancer, which had moved to his lung and towards the end, a part of his brain.
His last month was the worst time of my entire life. The arguments, the tears, My mother and one of my sisters (I can't remember who) caught covid so we had to juggle who could be where. It was also the first time in nearly 20 years all of us were together for longer than a day.
Myself and Winifred were lucky enough to have bosses that were very understanding and adjusted our schedules so we were given the month off to be with our family.
As I said Sarah works from home and sees clients from her home office. She maintained her regular work schedule while we were all meters away. I understand that was her choice but it seems like odd while our father was literally wasting away in his bed, especially since she works for herself so has a pretty good control of when she can work.
Our father was such a strong person. Every palliative nurse that came were more and more taken aback with each visit that he was still with us.
We all said our individual goodbyes and promises to look after each other when his condition had advanced too much not to, and the next morning, he passed.
He had a special relationship with all of us and things Sarah has said since his passing leads me to believe she thought hers was the only one that mattered.
The funeral ceremony was quick (as per his wishes). We elected Sarah to be the one to give the eulogy as the rest of us have anxiety issues with public speaking, but we read what she was going to say a few days before the ceremony. I was the first one to read what she wrote and noticed a bulk of the corrections were changing "My Dad" to "Our Dad", I wouldn't have mentioned it but there were even times even in conversation I would correct her on this, it may seem insignificant but it's just something that really bothered me. I mean when siblings talk about their parents to each other is normal to just say "mom" or "dad" to each other.
There was light food and drinks in a local bar afterwards. As there were so many arguments the previous month between Winifred, Sarah, Mary & my mother, me and my husband were really the only people making conversation with her and her husband, apart from the odd distant relative or two. A week or so later Sarah flew off to New York, something she tried to conceal from my mother but she forgot she mentioned it to her almost a year before. There was yet another huge argument between Winifred & Sarah when Sarah thought Winifred told my mother this big secret. This is another trait Sarah and my mother share, forgetting they say things and to whom. When asked why she was so mad if my mother knew she was going away was something along the lines of "Because I didn't want to give her any ammunition use and tell everyone at the funeral". My mother is a chronic complainer who has never seen the bigger picture in social situations, but she knows better than that. Plus she had just lost her husband of 46 years who was also her best friend of 50, something I think Sarah will never see
The last two years without our father have not gotten any better, Winifred was diagnosed with breast cancer, started chemo, then discovered it has spread to her other breast, all while looking after 2 teenagers with CF and going through a divorce to a deplorable human being who seems to take pleasure in making her miserable. When Sarah heard the news of the divorce she offered to attend court with her, Winifred told me she yelled at her and her representation for not saying enough in court and then later told my mother "I only helped her because she has cancer".
When going on vacation with her family Sarah told my mother days before there departure and I later found out her children caught chicken pox but she took them on the plane anyway. My mother does not drive and there is no stores that are easily accessible for her.
Sarah was also diagnosed with a cancerous tumor in her colon. Both have had treatments and they seem to be on the mend.
The relationship between Sarah and my mother did not get any better in fact Sarah's partner Billy became a reluctant go between for them both.
After our father passed, my mother asked Billy could her utility bills be altered as she was still paying half of everything, even though there was four people in their house (2 kids) and she was now on her own. His response was no and that her and our father agreed to split utilities evenly. We advised my mother to organize a pre-pay electric meter for her part of the house so she could manage it properly. Shortly after, Sarah and Billy stopped using the jacuzzi they recently purchased as it was too expensive for them to run.
One month my mother paid €400, the next month €200, 2 months later it was €500, there's no way a pensioner living on her own could rack up half of those bills (The average household here only gets their oil refilled once every 3-6 months). She also bought a free standing gas bottle heater in her main living area and had her upstairs radiators were turned off to try and limit the usage as she never really went up there. I will add that Sarahs business requires a somewhat constant use of energy so even a 50/50 split of bills seemed unfair. Since our fathers passing, my mother would also spend days at time either with me, Winifred or Mary, but she paid it anyway just to not have any arguments.
She made one small payment of about 4% of the total 20k to my mother before our father passed and laid out a payment plan to her about how much she'd pay each month. There were no further payments. A year later Sarahs family dog got seriously ill and needed a surgery that would cost 1300 and asked my mother to lend her this money & my mother, being soft hearted loaned it to her. She did make an attempt to pay my mother back but again, one small payment was made and no more. Each time my mother brought up the money she'd brush her off and not speak to her for a while. The longest was 3 weeks with zero contact, and remember, she lived right beside her and my mother doesn't drive and it would be impossible for her to walk to a store. If it weren't for Myself and Winifred constantly checking in my mother would have just rationed the food she had. We had suggested to arrange a food delivery in the past but Sarah and Billy didn't want strangers to know the code for the gate to the property, but knowing she hadn't spoken to our mother for 3 weeks and didn't care enough to ask if she needed anything in the store forced my hand to arrange one anyway.
Everything that's happened with Sarah has made us seriously re-think everything she said has happened in her life, and a pattern we've noticed is that she's pushed away all her serious partners family from them. Her first serious boyfriend of 7-8 years, then her ex husband and her current husband Billy. First it would start with their mother or sisters, small squabbles at here and there, then on a weekly basis, followed by a giant falling out which would result in her partners only seeing their family on occasion and eventually cutting contact. At the time we all took her at her word: their mothers didn't want their sons taken away, they were rude, they were jealous of her independence etc. But seeing her push us all away and seeing the same thing happen to us we all feel incredibly foolish.
Sarah has done and said some pretty horrible stuff over the years. I can't remember specific times or dates and some may seem trivial but these ones just stuck with me:
- When Winifred was fighting with my mother over something trivial, she suggested "keep your kids away from her (my mother), that will hurt her". She's always used her children under the guise of care anytime they had a disagreement, to try and manipulate the argument in her favour. On several occasions my mother would wave to them playing outside or walking by her window and they'd rapidly put their heads down as if being scolded, so god knows what Sarah has ben saying to them. While we were helping my mother was move out, my niece came inside and she was in tears because my mother was not there for her birthday a few weeks before. She asked her why she didn't come out to her, why she didn't see her on her birthday and asked why she was moving and if she still loved her. Taken aback when she heard this she said of course she told her she loved her and she always would, she told her once she has a phone she could call her every day if she wanted, she explained she needed to be somewhere she could go grocery shopping and have things close to her home. I wasn't thee for the whole interaction but when my niece left my mother said the things my niece said were things Sarah had said to my mother in the past verbatim.
- Bringing her kids on a plane to vacation while they (1 or both I can't remember) had chicken pox.
- Casually mentioning to my mother about money she has left from the sale of the house and what pension she’s getting and how much (some of my mothers post had gone missing)
- She once ran away from home when she was a teenager for several weeks because my parents gave her an 11PM curfew
- Always passing comment and keeping tally about how much her or her children received for birthdays or any kind of milestone event (most recently my aunt gave her son €30 and it was the first thing she mentioned when she talked about my aunt not staying until the end for her sons birthday, something along the lines of "€30? What can he buy with that?" He just turned 12 and we only see this aunt a couple of times a year. (Also I give all my nieces and nephews that amount for birthdays and Christmas so hearing this made me re-think all her past thank yous)
- Decades of berating Mary and putting her down, always about her weight or the way she acted (hyperactive, no filter etc)
- Admitting to Winifred that she decided to build a barrier at the end of her patio to make my mother take a less direct route and, in-turn, from "looking into her house" when she needed access the trash, but told us all it was a wind barrier. My mother has always preferred to keep her own blinds shut so she's usually adamant on not looking in other peoples houses.
- After divorcing her first husband my parents took her in until she had somewhere to live. Sarah was insistent on compensating them and our father eventually accepted as she wouldn't let it go. Months later during a heated argument she said they never cared for her, to which they argued that they recently asked her to live with them after her divorce, and without missing a beat she replied calmly "you were well paid for that"
-While our father was in decline he wasn't very verbal and his motor skills weren't the best, one time she brought her and her family out for waffles, she posted a photo of them in the car, and on inspection I noticed he is holding a knife, backwards trying to eat, I still think about this photo regularly because it just angers me that she mostly wanted to be seen taking care of him, without first seeing if he was even able to eat. She documents almost every activity her and her family do, which is fine, but it really calls into question if any of it is for the sake of the activity and trying to capture the moment for her family to remember, or just to be seen doing it. Another instance of this was each morning if it wasn't her turn to stay up for the night shift, the palliative care nurse would arrive Sarah would bring everyone breakfast, but if the nurse wasn't there there'd be nothing, which I know she didn't owe anyone and I shouldn't expect good deeds from people, but she'd also be in to see our father much later those days.
- Once my parents moved into the house, not a week had passed and her and Billy would say things such as "you know we're not your carers so if it comes to it you should have something arranged" and there was always snide comments about how they built their property on her kids play area, suggesting it was an inconvenience and big of her to let them build but I don't think she's ever thought how my parents chose to spend their retirement years with her and her kids. Both my parents had told me this and we were all appalled.
- While our father was unconscious towards the end, my mother just asked Billy about an additional €5 on her utility bill. He said the internet went up and my mother either just asked when or that she didn't know it increased. He left and then 20 minutes or so later, Sarah marched in and loudly exclaimed something like "Do you think Billly is a thief or something?!". This could normally be passed off as a somewhat regular family argument, but it was generally agreed between all of us that my father could still hear us. There were certain reactions when my mother would speak to him, or when I played him his favourite songs, so her choice to start a fight about this with our dying father inches away still infuriates me.
- My mother was an avid gardener, but when she got to Sarah's land she only allowed her to have 4 plant pots at the back of the house. So many times I remember waking up with her already outside, she'd have her visor on with dirt on her clothes waving to me in the kitchen. I've been asking her what plans she has for her garden now it's taking a lot of encouragement from the rest of us for her to get back into it now she has the space.
- When me and my sisters were alone while my father was sick, we were talking about my mother and how she would cope with life when my father passed. He was responsible for everything, bills being paid on time, insurance etc. Her finances came up and Winifred asked the room if she'll have enough coming in to live off. Sarah, with a combined covetous and grudging tone I'll never forget, listed off payments my mother would be getting and ended with a " so she'll be fine" and then scanned the room for our reactions. I immediately responded with "Oh thank god, I was so worried she'd be struggling", shocked by my relieved response she stared at me for a couple of seconds and then shifted to a softer tone "Oh yeah she'll be ok" then changed the subject. I know this is conjecture, but I know my sister. Her repeated mentioning of my parents money and her general obsession with how much people have, I know she was hoping for us all to join in on what I know would have been an acquisitive rant.
- Close to our fathers end, I could only bare to be at the top of his bed. It was too much for me too look at him. This shell of a person, who was so strong in life was now half his body weight and all my family in agony around him. When it got too much for me I'd ask someone (occasionally Sarah) to sit with him while I called my husband for support and to help me through it. I later found out she brought this up against me and said I was a wreck and kept running off and my sleep breaks were too long (I stayed up for 24-30 hours at a time so I was the only one to sleep more than 5 hours). Who is she to monitor how anyone grieves. She could go into Billy whenever it got too much so she had her support system right there.
I'm sure Sarah is a good mother to her children, as they're both always so happy and care free, but Sarah sees the rest of us all as this big stain on her life she's more than happy to wash out. She's said this in some form of another several times to my mother over the past few years, "I don't need any of you, I have my family, they're there for me". I've never been the most involved in all of my sister's life, but I always make sure to never miss a Christmas or birthday for them and I always send money or buy gifts for her children, I've sent her flowers when she was unwell and when she received her diagnosis, but with everything she's done even the idea of keeping up the pretence of civility puts a bad taste in my mouth.
My mother has recently bought a new house and looking at her it's like a light switch has turned back on. I haven't seen her so relaxed and happy since my father was alive. The years living on Sarah's land she barely decorated and never really got comfortable. But the same day of moving in the first thing she did was put up one or two stuffed animals and other trinkets. Our mother decided to keep buying a house a secret to not cause an argument with Sarah as it was too draining and Sarah would make an argument out of anything my mother said. When she had signed the papers she decided to message Sarah to tell her she was leaving (Sarah had decided to not speak with her at all and for months had only spoke to her through Billy, but if my mother was outside while Sarah was with a client she would wave and say hello to her) her response was very nonchalant with a "that's your decision" all of us expected a huge reaction as it was the norm.
A part of me thinks maybe this was her end game all along, not speaking to my mother, not helping her with groceries and never having time to knock on her door to see if she was even alive. Sarah's last words to my father while he was unconscious were that she was going to try and make it work with my mother and my mother promised the same. With 2 kids and a business to run she's always so busy so any text messages my mother would always sign off with "I'm her if you need me, you know I'm always here" and varying ways to let her know the ball was very much in Sarah's court. Myself, Mary and Winifred all have been visiting my mother from hours away so I don't know why she expects my mother to be the one walk 15 meters to her front door, one time my mother tried and she was greeted with Sarah's arm literally blocking the doorway to stop her from coming in. It's my view that Sarah's last words to my father were a complete and utter lie to him, a lie she can never take back or explain and I hope it haunts her.
The way Sarah has acted and the things she has said since my father’s passing it’s obvious she has warped the memory of who my dad was and it couldn't be more wrong. Being the youngest, quiet, and sort of on my own a lot growing up I was always a very observant person. My father worshiped my mother, they were best friends, did absolutely everything together, he always took her side about everything, every argument, every situation, he was her number one fan and it never faltered no matter what, they were always a united front. I know he would be incredibly ashamed and appalled of what Sarah and Billy have put my mother through, squeezing her for every penny, being incredibly cold and not even feigning that they care, although through outside sources she's painted a completely different picture, to which my mother and sisters have used pain remover each and every time. To Sarah, she lost her father and her father only. She is starting chemo soon and sources say things are looking better for her health wise but I'd still like advice.
Thank you.

So here goes... Last week my girlfriend asked me to tell her a fantasy I wanted her to do. I said I wanted a blowjob while watching Selena Gomez music videos. Sounds simple enough doesn't it? She was hesitant and wanted to have a discussion about why it wasn't porn and make sure that I was sure about my request. Made it through two and a half of her sexiest videos and finished on my girlfriend's tits, that's only weird because she is a swallower. As soon as she finished I got her her iced macchiato as per usual and a wet towel to clean up. After which she headed straight into the shower. We cuddled and finished watching a couple of binge episodes of Shogun before falling asleep. The next morning she was quiet during breakfast before I had to leave for work and didn't give me my kisses I walked out the door. When I came home from work she was waiting for me in the living room with one of her girlfriends and said she wanted to talk. We had a pretty heated discussion as her friend was there for moral support because my girlfriend couldn't find the exact words to display and communicate how she was feeling about last night. That being said two weeks later she wanted a break and went to stay with her friend. She came back and we had a conversation about how my perverse proclivities were causing her to feel self-conscious and unsure about where my mind was when it came to other women. Not having to spell it out but we broke up.
I say that without saying this we had had multiple conversations before about our other fantasies and on the regular would act out a fantasy for each other. For instance she wanted me to go down on her every 15 minutes during fifty shades of Gray. I didn't have a problem with that that was getting to do what I wanted to do while she was getting what she wanted. It never dawned on me that she not only was writing down the fantasies and keeping score but also commenting and making little side remarks in a journal about how my fantasies made her feel but me fulfilling her fantasies didn't have any commentary. Just trying to put two and two together and still figure out what happened and where I went wrong and generally just trying to vent. Thank you for having this outlet.

I just got my reduction today! (Will post photos when I’m feeling better) laying in a hospital bed as I type this. I thought I’d share my experience in Ireland because I couldn’t find much info myself.
I got a unilateral breast reduction since I had a difference of about 2 cups and the bigger one was also very droopy. This cost approx. €4000 in a private hospital and I was waiting maybe 8/9 months from gp referral to my consultation on January 24th, had to wait 3 weeks to call and say I’d like to go through with it, had a second consultation on April 10th, and had my pre assessment appointment on April 18th for a May 2nd surgery. I was initially quoted €6500 but I think this was for if I got both breasts done.
Insurance didn’t cover me as my breasts weren’t large enough and it’s mostly cosmetic. I’m approx a 36C on the smaller side and 36DD on the bigger side - I couldn’t measure with the difference so it’s just a guess.
I had to go to the hospital at 7am this morning, got an ekg, blood test and they took a pee sample. Got marked up at 9am and woke up in the recovery room at around 11:30 and stayed there for an hour or so before they brought me down to my room.
I was a bit nervous about anaesthesia but it was like falling into a nice sleep! Woke up very groggy and came around slowly but I’m still very tired. No pain but slightly stingy around the incisions. They put me in a soft comfortable bra that I have to wear for 6 weeks. I’ll be in the hospital overnight and can go home tomorrow!
I haven’t looked yet but I can already tell it’s a huge improvement. Excited to share before and afters when I’m able to!
TLDR: Unilateral lollipop breast reduction in Ireland (south area) €4000 out of pocket 9 months waiting for consultation, just over 3 months between initial consultation and surgery day 1 night mandatory stay in hospital