Context: I thought that AEW did a great job with the Continental Classic 6 months ago and I want to try to book the next one (as I imagine they will be doing this again). For this booking, I will be doing the men's continental classic in 2024. Now for this, we are changing one major thing for this tournament compared to what they did last year. The winner of this tournament will get a shot at the AEW World Championship at the Revolution PPV. The finals of the Continental Classic will take place at World's End. The world champion in this fantasy booking for around this time is Will Ospreay. All of these matches take place on episodes of Dynamite and Collision respectively (I won't book what match takes place on which network) , I'll just be booking the tournament week-to-week. Below are the competitors listed for each block.
EDIT: My first draft exceeded the character limit for a post so I will be trimming down match details
Gold Block:

• MJF
  • Just made his return recently, defeating Adam Cole at the latest PPV to settle their rivalry. Now has his sights set on winning the tournament and challenging for the World Championship.
• Konosuke Takeshita
  • The Don Callis family has representation in this tournament as Takeshita has been taking the AEW world by storm the last few months, being the stand out in the Callis family. Konosuke Takeshita is Don Callis's chosen one and declares that Takeshita will be bringing the World Championship to the family.
• Jack Perry
  • Has been put in thanks to the Elite, looking to bring the World Championship to the Elite.
• Dax Harwood
  • Playing the Mark Briscoe role of this tournament. Storyline-wise, he's been placed in this tournament by the Elite to keep the FTR from being able to compete for the Tag Team Championships. Cash encourages him to make this the biggest mistake of the Elite's life.
• Darby Allin
  • Since returning from injury in May, has been on fire with key wins over The Elite in Anarchy in the Arena, Jay White, and Big Bill. Looking to get back in the title hunt.
• Eddie Kingston
  • Last year's winner looking to go back-to-back, this time for a new prize. (I know he is injured in real life, i'm hoping he is recovered by then).

Blue Block:

• Kenny Omega
  • Has returned from injury and looking to get right back on track after being put in this tournament. (The Bucks tried to keep him from the tourney but was overruled by TK)
• Kazuchika Okada
  • The Elite have two members in to try to ensure that the World Championship goes to the Elite. Commentary puts over his familiarity with this kind of tournament).
• Chris Jericho
  • Seen as the veteran in this whole tournament, looking to make a statement and show his followers of the Chris Jericho "Learning Tree" how to succeed at the highest level and compete for a World title at this stage of his career.
• Ricky Starks
  • Has also returned from injury recently and considers himself a master of tournaments (puts over his win in the Owen Hart tournament) and looks to win this one, and win the gold.
• Malakai Black
  • The House of Black has been kicking all sorts of ass for the last several months and has a lot of momentum on their side. Malakai Black (the leader of the House of Black), will be part of this tournament to win the tournament, beat Will Ospreay, and continue to strengthen the momentum of the House of Black. The House always wins.
• Penta El Zero Miedo
  • Was originally going to be PAC, but a week before the tournament, PAC was mysteriously attacked and deemed unable to compete (storyline). While AEW investigates to find out of PAC's attacker, Penta El Zero Miedo steps in on PAC's behalf to compete.

Scoring: Win=3 points, Draw=1 point, Loss=0 points
20-minute time limits for each match
Outside interference is prohibited! No one is allowed at ringside (breaking these rules result in a point deduction)
Gold Block: Week 1

• Eddie Kingston def. Dax Harwood
  • We kick off the tournament with our first matchup in the Gold League between last year's winner of the Continental Classic, Eddie Kingston, going up against Dax Harwood. These two have a competitive match, with Dax pushing Eddie to his limit, but Kingston wins with the Spinning Back Fist. The two shake hands after the match and Eddie continues to celebrate his win.
• Konosuke Takeshita def. Darby Allin
  • For this match, Darby takes control early in the match, going at a very fast-pace, hitting dangerous and high flying moves to keep Takeshita at bay. However, Darby goes for one too many high risk moves and it costs him, as Takeshita hits his Power Drive Knee to pick up the victory. Post-match, Takeshita brawls with Darby and throws him off the stage, sending him crashing into some tables, as medical personnel tend to Darby.
• MJF def. Jack Perry
  • Before the match, there is a backstage segment between the two, as Jack Perry talks about how he remembers what MJF told him a long time ago and how he did in fact cut the goody-two-shoes act, but, instead of ruling AEW together, Jack has surpassed MJF and will prove that tonight. MJF tells Jack that Jack hasn't done anything yet to think that he has surpassed him and that being a top guy is more than just a cute arm band saying "scapegoat" and being friends with the EVPs. Max says that if he thinks that he is on MJF's level, that he can prove it in the ring against him. Jack is not amused. These two will main event whichever show they're on as they go back and forth. Both of them are using dirty tricks against each other and it appears that Jack has learned from their last encounter. Jack works over the shouldearm of MJF that comes into affect when MJF goes for Salt of the Earth but can't keep it locked in. The match ends after Jack attempts Salt of the Earth on Max but is able to turn it into a roll up and hold onto Perry's tights to secure the pinfall victory (because he's still a scumbag, but our scumbag). MJF gains 3 points and smiles and winks at a very frustrated Perry as he walks up the ramp, telling Perry that he still has much to learn.
• Gold Standings after Week 1:
  1. Konosuke Takeshita: (3 pts)
  2. Eddie Kingston: (3 pts)
  3. MJF: (3 pts)
  4. Darby Allin: (0 pts)
  5. Dax Harwood: (0 pts)
  6. Jack Perry: (0 pts)

Blue Block: Week 1

• Ricky Starks def. Chris Jericho
  • Starks and Jericho go about 13 minutes. Jericho uses veteran trickery to get an advantage at times but Ricky is able to take control at times, showing how good he truly is. In the end, Jericho goes for Judas Effect but Starks ducks it and running against the ropes and hitting Jericho with a second spear. Starks immediately picks Jericho back up and hits his finish, Rochambeau and gets the pinfall victory. Starks gets his first 3 points of the tournament.
• Malakai Black def. Penta El Zero Miedo
  • Malakai and Penta square off against each other and go a little over 10 minutes. The whole match is a sprint, as Penta tries to be more aggressive after being familiar with Malakai from their past encounters. The match ends after Penta goes for his package piledriver but is countered as Malakai then hits Black Mass to Penta, getting the pinfall victory. Malakai Black gets his first 3 points of the tournament.
• Kenny Omega vs Kazuchika Okada (TIME LIMIT DRAW)
  • This is the main event of a very special episode of Dynamite. These two go back and forth with plenty of callbacks to their previous matches, but Okada specifically targets the midsection of Omega (who has had his surgery). Both men go for their finishing moves multiple times in the match but is countered by the other man. In the end, Omega goes for the One Winged Angel after hitting several V-Triggers. Okada is able to counter once again, hitting a knee strike to Omega's midsection (that sends Omega to his knees, that one really hurt him). Okada hits his finish, Rainmaker but is down as he is completely exhausted. He crawls over to the pin but before he can get to him, the bell rings as the time expires, ending the match in a draw (a callback to their first match). Commentary puts over how this may affect both men for the rest of the tournament. Both men are awarded 1 point.
• Blue Standings after week 1:
  1. Ricky Starks: (3 pts)
  2. Malakai Black: (3 pts)
  3. Kazuchika Okada: (1 pts)
  4. Kenny Omega: (1 pts)
  5. Chris Jericho: (0 pts)
  6. Penta El Zero Miedo: (0 pts)

Gold Block: Week 2

• MJF def. Dax Harwood
  • These two have an old-school, classic wrestling match as Dax, again, pushes his opponent to their limit and give them their best as MJF has to dig deep to pull out a victory. Both men have their opponent in submissions, testing the will of their opponent as both fight to stay alive. In the end, after missing with a Diving headbutt from the top rope, MJF rolls Dax towards the apron and hits Heat Seeker to get the pinfall victory. After a tense stare post match, Dax finally offers his hand to MJF, MJF with a little hesitation, accepts it and the two shake hands after the match. MJF now has 6 points total and Dax is still scoreless.
• Eddie Kingston def. Darby Allin
  • Darby is BARELY cleared to compete for this match, and it's even encouraged by doctors backstage that Darby pull out of this match to which Darby will of course refuse. During the match, it is clear that Darby is less than 100% and Eddie takes most of the match. Eddie, knowing that Darby is in bad shape, is concerned and tells Darby to stay down (not in a heelish way, but more in a concerned way. He doesn't want to beat Darby this way and hurt him even further). Darby just keeps on fighting, taking advantage of Eddie not putting him down and hitting come back offense, resulting in close near falls. In the end, Kingston finally puts Darby down after slapping Eddie to stop patronizing him and gets another 3 points. Eddie shows his respect to Darby after the match.
• Jack Perry def. Konosuke Takeshita
  • Its a heel vs heel matchup but Jack will be wrestling heel while Takeshita wrestles a babyface style. Perry again is using dirty tricks but it doesn't faze Takeshita, who has been prepared by this in his training with Don Callis. It seems that when it is a fair fight, Takeshita is the one that is getting the upper hand, hitting the more significant moves during the exchanges. In the end, Takeshita goes for his Power Drive Knee but misses Jack, colliding with the turnbuckle instead (he sells the knee) and then, Jack Perry rolls Takeshita up, grabbing the tights of Takeshita, and picking up the pinfall victory. Takeshita and Callis (who now has entered the ring once the match was over) are fuming and argue with the referee who did not see what had happened. Jack Perry celebrates as he goes up the ramp and the Young Bucks congratulate him. Perry is on the board.
• Gold Standings after Week 2:
  1. MJF: (6 pts)
  2. Eddie Kingston: (6 pts)
  3. Konosuke Takeshita: (3 pts)
  4. Jack Perry: (3 pts)
  5. Darby Allin: (0 pts)
  6. Dax Harwood: (0 pts)

Blue Block: Week 2

• Malakai Black def. Chris Jericho
  • Jericho cuts a promo before his match saying that last week didn't go the way that he wanted but to not worry, because he is at his best when he is the underdog and he will still find a way to come back and win this entire tournament (he says this in a babyface way but is still clearly a heel, continuing that story they are doing in real life). Malakai Black beats Jericho in about 13-15 minutes with the Black Mass after countering the Judas Effect with Black Mass. Malakai Black gets another 3 points.
• Kazuchika Okada def. Penta El Zero Miedo
  • These two go a little over 15 minutes and Penta has his moments, but ultimately falls to the Rainmaker as Okada gets the pinfall victory. Okada get 3 points. Penta looks frustrated, as he has now lost twice already in the tournament.
• Kenny Omega def. Ricky Starks
  • These two go back and forth as Ricky is very close to victory at multiple points (this match is designed to showcase Ricky and elevate him), especially at one point, hitting a spear which Kenny sells like death as that spear looks to very much damage his midsection. Starks goes for the pin but Kenny kicks out at 2.9. The ref starts to check on Kenny, who looks to be in serious pain but Starks knows that he is almost out of time and sets up for the Rochambeau to which Kenny counters into a roll up but is kicked out at 2. After being unable to connect with the One-Winged Angel because of his midsection, Ricky goes for his finish again but Omega pins Starks after hitting a small package rollup, countering Ricky's finish. Ricky Starks is shocked and frustrated that he lost but then tends to Kenny who is still on the ground, and helps him to his feet. Starks helps him to the back.
• Blue Standings after week 2:
  1. Malakai Black: (6 pts)
  2. Kazuchika Okada: (4 pts)
  3. Kenny Omega: (4 pts)
  4. Ricky Starks: (3 pts)
  5. Chris Jericho: (0 pts)
  6. Penta El Zero Miedo: (0 pts)

Gold Block: Week 3

• Konosuke Takeshita def. Dax Harwood
  • There's a moment backstage between Takeshita and Don Callis as Don tells Takeshita its time to get serious, and that he needs to go out there and prove why he is the Alpha. Callis tells Takeshita to not disappoint him again. Dax and Cash interrupt the two men as Dax tells Takeshita that while he has no love or respect for Jack Perry, he says that him losing via cheating was karma coming to bite him. Dax says that after doing what he did to Darby, compromising him for possibly the rest of the tournament and aligning himself with Don Callis, any misfortune that happens to him will be of his own doing. Callis says that while Dax is a very accomplished tag team wrestler and respects his accomplishments, he tells Dax that he doesn't have the singles resume to address them in any manor. Callis says that Takeshita is looking for a bounce back, and says that Dax will be the perfect man to make an example of tonight. Dax tells him to tell Takeshita to bring his best, because if he doesn't, Dax will expose him. The two have their match, and despite Dax's best efforts, Takeshita picks up the win.
• Jack Perry def. Darby Allin
  • Jack Perry attacks Darby before the bell rings, the official asks Darby if he can continue and Darby says yes. Jack Perry takes advantage of Darby being less than 100% but is also being cocky, talking trash and taking his time, rather than going for the win right away. Darby takes advantage of this by being able to hit comeback offense and take control of the match at a certain point. After an accidental ref bump where either Perry or Darby hit the ref with an accidental elbow. Darby gets the Last Supper in (and would have gotten the 3-count) but the ref take a little bit to get back up from the strike, and when counting the pin, Perry kicks out at 2. Perry picks up the win after hitting a sneaky low blow to Darby and hitting his finish, Blindside Elbow to get the pinfall victory.
• MJF def. Eddie Kingston
  • Before this match there is a vignette promo from Eddie Kingston where he talks about the importance of winning this tournament and how happy he is that he is off to a hot start but doesn't have his eyes off the prize. He continues by acknowledging his opponent MJF and how different the two are. Kingston says that MJF has always had everything he has ever wanted and grew up different than how he did, he calls MJF privileged, saying that he hasn't had to work to the degree that he has to get what they have achieved in their careers. Kingston finishes by saying that against him there is no easy way out, and that if he is going to win, he's going to have to earn it and tells MJF that he doesn't respect him. He has to earn that too. MJF responds in a backstage interview telling Eddie that even though its true that he grew up different than Eddie to not disrespect and try to minimize his accomplishments and the work that he has put in to achieve his success. He tells Eddie that he doesn't care whether or not Eddie respects him, but that Eddie will have no choice but to respect the fact that he is better than Kingston. MJF nearly loses after teasing using the diamond ring but choosing not to which results in Eddie hitting a spinning back first for a 2-count. MJF ends up hitting the Heat seeker and pinning Eddie. MJF offers his hand to Eddie to shake his hand. Eddie refuses and just walks to the back. (Backstage, Renee tries to get a word with Eddie, but before Eddie can say anything, he is attacked by the Young Bucks and Jack Perry, trying to get an advantage in next week's match).
• Gold Standings after Week 3
  1. MJF: (9 pts)
  2. Eddie Kingston: (6 pts)
  3. Konosuke Takeshita: (6 pts)
  4. Jack Perry: (6 pts)
  5. Darby Allin: (0 pts)
  6. Dax Harwood: (0 pts)

Blue Block: Week 3

• Penta El Zero Miedo def. Chris Jericho
  • These two men are desperate to get their first points in the tournament and stay in contention as they beat the hell out of each other. Jericho starts to use dirty tricks to try to gain an advantage and Penta is wrestling a lot more aggressively and brutally than we're used to (for those who are Lucha Underground fans, he's wrestling like the first few seasons in this match). In the end, Penta picks up the win after Jericho fails with his dirty tricks, getting caught with his feet on the ropes at one point. Penta low blows him after a ref bump, hitting his finish right after. Penta celebrates as commentary says Jericho now is eliminated from winning. Post-match, Jericho attacks Penta, frustrated of this result. However, Penta is able to get the upper hand of the brawl and Penta looks to tease going for the arm snap spot he does where he wrenches back on his opponent's arm, but then decides to spare Jericho, letting go of the arm and walking to the back.
• Kazuchika Okada def. Ricky Starks
  • This is another 15+ minute match designed to showcase Ricky Starks as he comes as close as anyone has so far of beating Okada up to this point. Ricky has many counters to the Rainmaker, even countering one Rainmaker and hitting a spear after for a close 2 count. Ricky seems to have an answer to all of Okada's best moves. However, Okada is able to counter Rochambeau and finally hit the Rainmaker and get the pinfall victory. Okada gets 3 points and Starks has dropped his last two matches, still at 3 points total.
• Malakai Black def. Kenny Omega
  • Kenny looks to be in rough shape for this match. Malakai relentlessly goes after Kenny's midsection, throwing kicks and knees targeting Kenny's injury. Kenny is able to hit big moves and have moments where he looks to be taking control, but before he can fully take control of the match, Malakai hits a heavy strike to the midsection of Omega, flooring him and sending him down to the mat. Kenny is able to fight back and hit significant offense but at another point, Black hits Black Mass to the midsection, sending Omega to the floor and nearly getting counted out. In the end, after Kenny attempts a One-Winged Angel, Kenny hesitates as his midsection is compromised thanks to Black's strategy, Black spits the mist into his hands and rakes Omega's eyes (The ref doesn't see as they are dealing with an exposed turnbuckle that Malakai exposed earlier). As Kenny is blinded, Malakai hits Black Mass, and gets the pinfall victory. Commentary puts over that this may be Black's biggest win in his career and the biggest win in the tournament so far. The final shot is Malakai sitting cross legged in the ring with the biggest smile on his face as referees and doctors check on Kenny.
• Blue Standings after Week 3:
  1. Malakai Black: (9 pts)
  2. Kazuchika Okada: (7 pts)
  3. Kenny Omega: (4 pts)
  4. Ricky Starks (3 pts)
  5. Penta El Zero Miedo (3 pts)
  6. Chris Jericho (0 pts)

Gold Block: Week 4

• Jack Perry def. Eddie Kingston
  • Eddie comes out with a fury, immediately brawling with Perry to start the match after the attack from last week. Perry is able to use Kingston's anger to capitalize on his mistakes and take control of the match at times. Perry targets Kingston's previously injured leg from back in May, slowing Kingston down from being able to hit any major offense. At one point, Eddie is able to hit his Spinning Back Fist out of nowhere to Jack but isn't able to cover him right away because of his leg, but still crawls over to go for the pin. Perry kicks out at 2.9. Perry goes to the top to attempt a cross body but Eddie moves and Perry connects with the ref instead. Eddie gets back up and hits a second Spinning Back Fist and covers Jack (visual 3-count) but there is no ref to count the pin. Eddie is frustrated, knowing that was his best chance up to this point to get a crucial win. Eddie picks Jack up and goes for the Northern Lights Bomb, but his leg gives out, Jack Perry hits a low blow and then follows it up with his Blindside Elbow finish and gets the pinfall victory as a new referee enters the ring to count the pin. Jack Perry has earned another 3 points in a crucial match as now he is in a good spot in the tournament and Eddie looks crushed (though not eliminated yet, he needs a lot of things to happen to have a chance).
• Darby Allin def. Dax Harwood
  • These two go back and forth in a hard hitting match and Dax comes as close as he has gotten to winning any of these matches. Dax nearly wins multiple times but Darby is able to get his Last Supper pin and beat Dax. Darby gets 3 points. Backstage, Cash is trying to motivate and support his tag partner until Jack comes into frame, laughing and talking trash to Dax, telling him that he is showcasing that he was the weak link in FTR and that he will be sure to credit Dax in his victory speech when he beats him next week. As Jack leaves, Dax is fired up, finding the motivation that he needed as Cash tells Dax that this is the opportunity to make the Elite pay for putting him in the Continental Classic.
• Konosuke Takeshita def. MJF
  • MJF in a backstage interview before the match calls Takeshita, "Take-a-shit-a", and tells him that though he has been very impressive since they last had their encounter, he will show that when they step in the ring together, no matter what day, he (MJF) is the alpha. MJF says that there is nothing Takeshita can do to stop him from winning this tournament and in the ring, MJF will show Takeshita that he is better than him, and deep down, he and Don Callis knows it. These two have a main-event level match as they go back and forth, with both men looking to come close to winning at different times. Takeshita looks very intense and motivated for this match, wanting to not only secure a very important win, but get revenge on MJF who has insulted him and beaten him in the past. In the final stretch, MJF puts on the Diamond Ring and waits for Takeshita to get to his feet, but, before he can connect with a punch, the ref catches MJF in the act and takes his ring. The ref makes his way over to the corner to hand the ring off to the ring announcer at ringside, but Takeshita picks up MJF and drives him towards the turnbuckle, they collide into the ref, who drops the ring in the process. As the ref tries to get back to their feet, Takeshita puts on the Dynamite Diamond Ring and waits for MJF to get to his feet. Takeshita nails MJF with the ring, knocking him out right before the ref could see. Takeshita covers MJF and gets the pinfall victory in a shocking upset. Takeshita celebrates wildly as Don Callis comes running in the ring, hugging Takeshita and celebrating as if they have won the tournament already. Commentary puts over that this is the biggest win of Takeshita's career and has put him in a great position in the Gold League. Takeshita nails MJF one more time with the Power Drive Knee and leaves with MJF's diamond ring.
• Gold Standings after Week 4
  1. Konosuke Takeshita: (9 pts)
  2. MJF: (9 pts)
  3. Jack Perry: (9 pts)
  4. Eddie Kingston: (6 pts)
  5. Darby Allin: (3 pts) (eliminated from winning)
  6. Dax Harwood: (0 pts) (eliminated from winning)

Blue Block: Week 4

• Kenny Omega def. Penta El Zero Miedo
  • Kenny is looking to bounce back and secure a victory in order to stay alive in this tournament while Penta is trying to build off his win from last week and secure a victory over Omega to stay alive in this tournament and keep his momentum going. Penta shows a more hard hitting style, using precise strikes to target certain parts of Omega. In the final stretch of the match, after hearing that there is a minute left in the match, Penta abandons the arm break spot that he was teasing and picks Kenny up to attempt a Package Piledriver. However, Kenny counters out of the Package Piledriver, hits a V-trigger and follows it up with the One Winged Angel and gets the pinfall victory. Kenny celebrates his win as he is still alive and Penta is sitting in the ring, furious that he is now eliminated from winning the tournament. The ref tries to tend to Penta but Penta shoves the referee, shouting at him in spanish and looks like he may attack but Fenix comes out to calm him down. There's a tense stare between the two and then Penta superkicks the ref as he gets back to his feet. Penta storms to the back.
• Kazuchika Okada def. Chris Jericho
  • Chris Jericho cuts a pre-match promo, doing the whole style that he has been doing lately where he pretends to be a Babyface but is a Heel where he talks about how the tournament hasn't gone the way that he had hoped but he will be looking to have the biggest wins in the tournament when he beats Okada and Omega back to back. Jericho says that he will show his followers, fans, and the wrestlers in the back what it's like to be the greatest of all time and the Learning Tree. Jericho tries to use some dirty tricks to slow down Okada but in the end, after a little over 10-12 minutes, Okada wins with the Rainmaker, getting the pin. Okada is in a good spot while Jericho is still winless in this tournament as now, even he is looking frustrated.
• Ricky Starks def. Malakai Black
  • A big match with big stakes for both of these men as Black can secure his place in the finals with a win over Starks and Starks needing to win to still have a chance to win this tournament. Malakai takes most of the match but Ricky gives him a fight, nearly pinning him with a spear. In the end, Malakai Black signals to hit Black Mass but Starks counters it into a jackknife pin, 1...2...3! Starks has pulled the upset win over Black! Starks gets 3 points and keeps himself alive in this tournament and Black (who would have guaranteed himself being in the Blue League finals with a win) now has to win next week against Okada. Black is furious, spitting the black mist into the eyes of Ricky Starks, blinding him as Starks screams in pain. Malakai then hits Black Mass to Ricky, and walks to the back as referees and doctors tend to Starks.
• Blue Standings after Week 4:
  1. Kazuchika Okada: (10 pts)
  2. Malakai Black: (9 pts)
  3. Kenny Omega (7 pts)
  4. Ricky Starks (6 pts)
  5. Penta El Zero Miedo (3 pts) (eliminated from winning)
  6. Chris Jericho (0 pts) (eliminated from winning)

Gold Bock: Week 5

• Konosuke Takeshita def. Eddie Kingston
  • This is a must-win for both Takeshita and Eddie, but even more so for Eddie, who must win to have a chance (though it's a slim one anyway). Eddie comes out with a fury, trying to catch Takeshita off-guard. Takeshita goes for a lariat but misses as Kingston connects with a Spinning Back Fist (after only a minute has gone in the match) and goes for the quick, shocking pin but Takeshita kicks out at 2. The rest of the match is a hard hitting affair with Kingston refusing to stay down, even enduring some of Takeshitas best moves (Blue Thunder Bomb for a close 2-count, Spinning Falcon Arrow where Kingston gets his foot on the ropes, etc.). Kingston at another point hits a second Spinning Back fist but Takeshita rolls to the outside, avoiding the pin attempt. In the end, after attempting the Northern Lights Bomb, Takeshita counters and chop blocks Kingston's leg. Takeshita hits Eddie Kingston with the Dynamite Diamond Ring (the ref doesn't see it) and puts Kingston away, getting the pinfall victory. Takeshita and Callis celebrate the win and await their opponent for the finals and Eddie just looks crushed.
• MJF vs Darby Allin (TIME LIMIT DRAW)
  • MJF can guarantee his spot in the finals with a win over Darby but after Darby won last week, he will be looking to win again especially against a familiar foe from his past. The two go back and forth, MJF working over the arm of Darby to set up for his Salt of the Earth submission but Darby is going for high-risk moves, even hitting a few of them to get himself back in the match. MJF looks to hit a tombstone piledriver on the apron but Darby counters it into a Scorpion Death Drop (Sting's old finish) and then hits the Coffin Drop to MJF on the apron, taking both men out for a little bit. With a minute left in the match, after Darby kicked out of the Heat Seeker, Darby attempts a springboard Coffin Drop but MJF moves out of the way going and goes for a rollup pin, which Darby kicks out at 2. Darby attempts Last Supper, but MJF kicks out at 2. MJF finally is able to get Darby into the Salt of the Earth after attempting it all night, and Darby is in serious pain and trouble. Darby can't get to the ropes but refuses to tap. MJF starts to bend and twist the fingers of Darby but Darby again, refuses the tap. Commentary puts over that MJF might break the arm of Darby if Darby doesn't tap and then the bell rings. The ring announcer makes an announcement, declaring this match, a draw. MJF looks devastated, knowing that a win tonight would have guaranteed him a spot in the Gold League finals. Now, his fate is in Jack Perry's hands when he takes on Dax Harwood later in the night. MJF is pissed off backstage, trashing an area of the backstage area in frustration. Jack Perry shows up (with the Young Bucks by his side) as he laughs, telling Max that he blew it, he choked when it was all on the line. Perry said that he's going to go out there and win, and when he wins and goes to the finals, he's going to win the whole tournament and eventually become the AEW World Champion (and says that he'll be an even greater champion than MJF). Perry leaves to prepare for his match.
• Dax Harwood def. Jack Perry
  • Jack Perry is a cocky prick during this match as he thinks this is a shoe-in to win. Jack seems like he is more focused on showing off and trying to embarrass Dax rather than trying to win the match. Dax starts to fight back and give Jack some serious problems. With a minute left and feeling the pressure, Perry attempts a brainbuster but Dax turns it into a small package rollup and gets the 3-count, pinning Jack Perry! Jack Perry is shocked, now officially being eliminated from the tournament as he argues with the referee (and so do the Young Bucks as they come down to the ring). Dax leaves up the ramp and celebrates with Cash. They have succeeded in making the Elite pay.

Blue Block: Week 5

• Ricky Starks def. Penta El Zero Miedo
  • Ricky Starks needs to win to stay alive and hope for the best with the matchups later tonight as Penta is now playing the role of spoiler. Penta seems to be wrestling different than we are used to, wrestling more like a Heel focusing more on his brutality than his high flying move-set. Ricky refuses to stay down. Eventually, after being frustrated he can't put Ricky away, starts to set up his arm break spot, having the worst intentions in mind as commentary says that this could seriously injure Ricky. Before Penta can snap the arm back, Ricky counters and hits a spear. Ricky then picks Penta up without hesitation and hits Rochambeau to get the pinfall victory. Ricky celebrates his win in the ring as he has done all he can and now awaits the results (he needs Jericho to beat Omega and Okada to beat Black). Penta is as FUMING and attacks Ricky Starks after the match, hitting him with a superkick and then the Package Piledriver to Ricky. Penta has lost it, as he starts to set up the arm break spot but as a ref tries to intervene, Penta hits the ref with a Package Piledriver as well! Rey Fenix comes down to the ring and tries to once again, calm Penta down but it doesn't work as Penta has now turned on Fenix, hitting him with a Package Piledriver too (he has truly turned Heel). Ricky starts to move a little bit and Penta notices Starks. Finally, he hits his Arm Breaker (snapping the arm back, whatever the move is called), injurying Starks as he screams in pain. Commentary puts over that Penta may have just broken Ricky's arm and Penta leaves. (so, with this, if Ricky is leaving for WWE, you have an angle that writes him off for good. If Ricky decides to return to AEW, you have a story waiting for him).
• Kenny Omega def. Chris Jericho
  • This is a must-win for Kenny Omega, as he could potentially be in the finals as long as he wins tonight. Jericho says that this match is personal for him. Jericho says that not only does winning this match mean he doesn't go the whole tournament without scoring any points, but also gets revenge on the man that betrayed him and left him stranded in the tag division when he abandoned the Golden Jets (Kenny needed surgery but Jericho, being self-centered, sees it as Kenny abandoning him and being selfish while Jericho has done nothing "but be completely selfless, wanting to be a teacher and mentor, not a deserter). Jericho uses all of his dirty tricks in the book to try to beat Kenny. Jericho even successfully hits the Judas Effect on Kenny but Omega kicks out at 2.9! Jericho has the Walls of Jericho on Omega but Kenny gets out of it eventually being able to hit multiple V-triggers on Jericho. In the end, Kenny Omega is able to counter the Codebreaker, putting him in a powerbomb position but then is able to shift Jericho around on his shoulders and has him in position to hit the One Winged Angel and gets the pinfall victory. Kenny is officially in the Blue League Finals, awaiting to see who his opponent (or opponents) will be. Jericho just sits there in disbelief, he has not won any matches and has scored 0 points for the whole tournament. He looks over by ringside to see Big Bill, who is looking over at Jericho. Big Bill looks disappointed, shaking his head, and walking straight to the back, without his mentor by his side.
• Kazuchika Okada def. Malakai Black
  • This match has very high stakes as Kenny Omega is now guaranteed to be in the Blue Block finals after beating Chris Jericho. If Okada wins, then it is he and Omega facing off one-on-one in the finals of the Blue block. If Malakai Black wins this, then the Blue Block finals turns into a triple threat match of Omega, Okada, and Black. These two have a very competitive back-and-forth match as Okada looks to avoid Black Mass and the Black Mist at all times and Malakai goes after Okada's arm, targeting and weakening it to affect his finish, Rainmaker. At one point, after missing Black Mass, Okada is able to hit Rainmaker on Malakai but grabs his arm in pain after using it to hit Rainmaker (but it's also the same arm that Malakai has been targeting the whole match). Okada goes for the pin but Black has his foot on the bottom rope to break the pin right before the ref counts 3. At another point, Malakai is able to hit Black Mass out of nowhere on Okada but can't get the pin as Okada rolls out of the ring after being hit with Black Mass just before Black can go for the pin. Malakai rolls him back in the ring and goes for Black Mass again but it's countered into a Rainmaker, but that's countered into a knee strike. Black goes for a lariat but Okada counters and finally hits a second Rainmaker (again, Okada sells the pain of doing his finish) and gets the pinfall victory over Malakai Black as both men are spent. The match is official between Omega and Okada.

Final Standings (Gold and Blue):

• Gold Block:
  1. Konosuke Takeshita: (12 pts)
  2. MJF: (10 pts)
  3. Jack Perry: (9 pts)
  4. Eddie Kingston: (6 pts)
  5. Darby Allin: (4 pts)
  6. Dax Harwood: (3 pts)
• Blue Block:
  1. Kazuchika Okada: (13 pts)
  2. Kenny Omega: (10 pts)
  3. Ricky Starks: (9 pts) (breaks tiebreaker with Black)
  4. Malakai Black: (9 pts)
  5. Penta El Zero Miedo (3 pts)
  6. Chris Jericho: (0 pts)

Gold Block Finals:

• MJF def. Konosuke Takeshita
  • In an interview before the show, MJF addresses Takeshita by his real name (no longer calls him "Take-a-shit-a") and says that he has gotten so much better since their last encounter, but with everything on the line, he won't be able to put down the Devil. These two open the very special episode of Dynamite, "Winter is Coming". They have another great match, throwing everything they have at each other to try to put their opponent away. Takeshita comes very close, but in the end, after failing to hit MJF with the Diamond Ring, MJF makes Takeshita tap to the Salt of the Earth. Post-match, MJF takes his ring back.

Blue Block Finals:

• Kenny Omega def. Kazuchika Okada
  • These two have a face-to-face backstage with the theme of the encounter being, who is the true "best bout machine". These two have a classic that they are absolutely capable multiple times over of having as they also main event a special episode of Dynamite, "Winter is Coming". Omega and Okada again go a long-time and nearly go to another time limit draw. This match comes down who will make the first mistake. After a long battle, Kenny wins with the One-Winged Angel, putting away his biggest rival and going to the finals.

Continental Classic Finals: AEW World's End

• Kenny Omega def. MJF
  • The match is very similar to their first match on Collision. These two hit each other with everything they have, even showing some new moves that we haven't seen them hit. In the end, after going for the One Winged Angel for the entire match, Kenny finally hits it on MJF and gets the pinfall victory. Kenny has won the Continental Classic. They shake hands and then MJF nails Kenny with a low blow and leaves.

(MJF goes on to be a heel from this and Kenny Omega will face Will Ospreay in the main event of Revolution for the AEW World Championship)
What did you think? Did you like it? Did you not like it? What did you specifically like or dislike about it? Let me know!

1. Imagery: Prompt: Choose a setting (real or imaginary) and describe it using detailed sensory imagery. Imagine the sights, sounds, smells, and textures to create a vivid scene, just like a painter with words.
   
2. Metaphor: Prompt: Compare a personal experience to an everyday object or phenomenon in an unexpected way. For example, "My heart is a compass that always points to the north of your laughter."
   
3. Simile: Prompt: Write a series of similes to express intense emotions. For instance, "As brave as a lion facing the storm, as fragile as a petal in the wind."
   
4. Rhyme: Prompt: Craft a short poem or lyrics with a consistent rhyme scheme. Experiment with different rhyme patterns (ABAB, AABB, etc.) to enhance the musicality of your writing.
   
5. Meter: Prompt: Compose a poem with a specific meter, such as iambic pentameter. Pay attention to the syllabic beats in each line to create a rhythmic flow.
   
6. Alliteration: Prompt: Create a tongue-twisting line using alliteration. Focus on the repetition of initial consonant sounds to add a playful or musical quality to your writing.
   
7. Assonance: Prompt: Write a passage where the vowel sounds within words echo each other. Experiment with different vowel combinations to create a melodic effect.
   
8. Personification: Prompt: Choose an inanimate object and personify it. Describe its actions, thoughts, and emotions as if it were a living being.
   
9. Symbolism: Prompt: Select an object or element and explore its symbolic meaning. Connect it to broader themes or emotions in your writing.
   
10. Enjambment: Prompt: Write a poem where the thoughts flow continuously from one line to the next without a pause. Explore how this technique can create a sense of movement or urgency.
    
11. Repetition: Prompt: Repeat a word or phrase throughout a poem for emphasis. Consider how repetition can enhance the overall impact and meaning of your writing.
    
12. Free Verse: Prompt: Embrace the freedom of expression by writing a poem without adhering to rhyme or meter. Allow your thoughts to flow organically, exploring the beauty of formless verse.
    
13. Stanza: Prompt: Divide your writing into stanzas to create distinct sections with varying themes or tones. Explore how the organization of lines contributes to the overall structure of your work.
    
14. Theme: Prompt: Choose a universal theme (love, loss, freedom, etc.) and explore it through your lyrics. Delve into the nuances and perspectives associated with the chosen theme.
    
15. Tone: Prompt: Write a poem that conveys contrasting tones. Explore how shifts in tone can evoke different emotions and responses from the reader.
    
16. Connotation: Prompt: Select a word with strong connotations and use it in a poem. Explore the emotional baggage and cultural associations tied to the word within the context of your writing.
    
17. Irony: Prompt: Craft a poem with elements of irony. Create situations or lines that convey a meaning opposite to the literal interpretation, adding layers of complexity to your writing.
    
18. Allusion: Prompt: Reference a well-known song, book, or historical event in your lyrics. Explore how the use of allusion can enrich the depth and meaning of your writing.
    
19. Syntax: Prompt: Experiment with sentence structure to create different effects. Play with word order, sentence length, and punctuation to convey specific emotions or rhythms in your writing.
    
20. Diction: Prompt: Choose a specific mood or atmosphere you want to convey and carefully select words that evoke that feeling. Pay attention to the impact of your word choices on the overall tone of your writing.
    

Let's start with some fundamental concepts: - Lemonade/Ned: creativity - Storm: negative thoughts, overthinking, etc. - Cycle: allegory for the writing process
All of "Backslide" focuses on the allegory of the cycle, a theme repeated in other songs, representing a cycle that Tyler is repeatedly drawn into—the cycle of writing where he delves into his mind/Dema and writes about his fears, insecurities, etc. The "rat race" symbolizes the chase for success; the writing process has become a rat race, not just a cathartic process but also one aimed at profit and success (see the "Lane Boy" video with two people in hazmat suits labeled "fame" and "success"). The entire video symbolizes his creative writing process. Here, we see a contrast between Ned's buns and young Tyler's lemonade (pure and uncorrupted). When Tyler tries to eat a bun, he throws it on the ground because he doesn't like the taste, symbolizing his dissatisfaction with his creativity. However, when he goes to the lemonade stand, he buys and drinks it with pleasure; the lemonade represents healthy, good creativity before Tyler started going into Dema. When the child picks up the bun, he doesn't recognize or dislikes what he sees.
Now let's talk about the storm. During his bike ride (his writing process), Tyler is intermittently thrown into a storm, symbolizing his insecurities about what he writes and creates. Once he reaches Josh, the buns are unusable, meaning his creativity and what he creates become unusable due to negative thoughts (the buns are soaked by the storm = his negative thoughts overpowering his creativity). The video ends with him returning to buy the buns, but notice where he buys them—in a shop reminiscent of Dema, indicating that he returns to Dema to write about his insecurities and the cycle begins anew.
I have an entirely different theory about "Chlorine" and the number 17, about him being the papermaker and his disdain for his creative process being tied only to his insecurities and thus only talking about Dema. Maybe I'll write another post to analyze this in detail.

"While the Badlands has always been a scary place in the Trek universe, there's also something ethereal and magical about this specific spacescape. In DS9, it was a place of refuge for an idealistic band of rebels. In Voyager, the Badlands became a doorway to a larger adventure, changing the lives of Janeway and the rest of the crew in ways that had countless repercussions throughout all of Star Trek history. And now, in Discovery, the Badlands becomes a diaphanous, whimsical setting for a library in space."
Ryan Britt (StarTrek .com)
Link:
https://www.startrek.com/en-un/news/brief-history-of-the-badlands
Quotes/Excerpts:
"Discovery's return to the Badlands might be the next-to-last stop on the treasure map to get the elusive secrets of the Progenitor tech, but it's a thrilling moment for longtime Star Trek fans. The Badlands isn't just a random Easter egg. This is a part of space pivotal to the history of the 24th Century, a place which spans not just a chunk of the Alpha Quadrant, but the paths of two beloved Trek shows — Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and Star Trek: Voyager.
In many ways, the Badlands represents a moment in Star Trek history where the franchise was getting really good at planting seeds for later plot developments, and, in the case of the Badlands, for TV series that had yet to even premiere. As many longtime fans know, back in the 1990s, having serialized arcs on any TV show was rare, meaning that ongoing shared continuity between Star Trek: The Next Generation and Deep Space Nine was downright revolutionary.
How does this connect to the Badlands? Well, before the U.S.S. Voyager actually went into the Badlands in the 1995 series premiere of Star Trek: Voyager, "Caretaker," the concept of the Badlands was introduced in Deep Space Nine.
On April 24, 1994, in the 20th episode of Deep Space Nine's second season, the concept of the Badlands was quietly introduced. Titled "The Maquis, Part I," the episode introduced the growing resistance movement among former Federation colonists living in a demilitarized zone that now was part of Cardassian space. This storyline was directly connected to The Next Generation episode "Journey's End," which had aired just a month prior on March 28, 1994. That episode established the conundrum of what was happening to the Federation colonists in the Cardassian DMZ, and then, DS9's "The Maquis, Part I" and "The Maquis, Part II," revealed what happened when those colonists organized into a fighting force.
By May 16, 1994, this storyline pivoted back to TNG with the episode "Preemptive Strike," in which Ro Laren defects to the Maquis, breaking Captain Picard's heart for nearly 30 years, until their reconciliation in the 2023 episode of Star Trek: Picard, "Imposters."
So, in 1994, the Star Trek franchise escalated a huge storyline in March, April, and May. And one common element of this entire Maquis storyline was the Badlands.
Although Deep Space Nine introduced the concept of the Badlands in Season 2, and later mentioned it again in the Season 3 episode "Defiant," the full destructive and absurdly dangerous aspect of the Badlands wasn't fully on display until the first episode of Star Trek: Voyager.
In "The Maquis, Part 1," Sisko says, "A few ships have been lost there over the past year or two," which again, foreshadows the moment when Voyager, and then Chakotay's ship the Val Jean, are transported to the Delta Quadrant, from the Badlands.
So while the Badlands had been visited and name-checked before Voyager, most fans associate this unstable region of space with that series. And with good reason, if Voyager had never pursued the Val Jean into the Badlands, the entire show would never have happened. Janeway even selected the temperamental, former-criminal Tom Paris as her pilot, because the Badland were known to be treacherous. And although DS9 would revisit the Badlands a bit more in subsequent seasons, the pink-orange landscape of the plasma storms from the opening moments of "Caretaker" have been burned into the brains of fans for almost 30 years.
[...]
While the Badlands has always been a scary place in the Trek universe, there's also something ethereal and magical about this specific spacescape. In DS9, it was a place of refuge for an idealistic band of rebels. In Voyager, the Badlands became a doorway to a larger adventure, changing the lives of Janeway and the rest of the crew in ways that had countless repercussions throughout all of Star Trek history. And now, in Discovery, the Badlands becomes a diaphanous, whimsical setting for a library in space.
One of Star Trek's recurring themes is the ways in which the pursuit of knowledge can help us all overcome hardship. And in Discovery, that theme is perfectly exemplified by a celestial library, at the center of an interstellar storm."

Preface With Part 2 out for a good while, I thought it would be time to make this thread. I'm sure there are other threads that I probably missed in the months since the release of Part 2, but I'm going to start this regardless. If anyone has a reference to a previous iteration, please link it.
The complexity of Part 1 was apparent. It's why many of us watched it over, and over. Obviously not perfect (stares at the few long time community members). I was drawn to the visions. It wasn't until the third time I saw Part 1, tripping on mushrooms as any proper DUNE enjoyer should do if your serious about the franchise. If that's a bridge too far, sorry, you're not a fan. Do I have to point out the sarcasm? Something that I really focused on were the visions. After watching twice before, the memories of those viewings were playing tricks on me. It felt like an intentional experience crafted to put forth the themes of prescience in a way outside of narrative foreshadowing. To quote my previous post:
It almost felt like it was supposed to be watched this way with how the oppressive music made me feel. The relief I felt when Paul meditates during the thopter escape in the sand storm. I must not fear, fear is the mind killer. so many things specific to what they say when going on a trip. That's the point of Spice right? It's psychoactive, but also taps into prescience. The past, the future folding in on itself. Holy shit I picked up on a lot of details I had not noticed. Like Jamis and the Fremen's prophecies. How the spice gives them a tangible connection to their beliefs. Sensing the future through spice, convincing them of who Paul is, because it was preordained according to the seed planted by the Bene Gesserit. So when Paul came to them in the desert, Jamis knew he was going to die if Paul was really the one. Jamis appearing earlier in a vision to Paul, talking about going with the process, guiding him, was more clear to me. He became Paul's guide in a more important way with his death.
The scene before the fight when Paul tries to say something to Chani, but couldn't find the words. I think the words he was looking for was "sorry to disappoint you" in regards to him being expected to die. He almost seems to giggle. Another moment too, when the Baron has Duke Leto at the dining table and had just killed Yueh. The Baron says "you know what's next?" In the context of Spice, this came across very differently. The line hovered in the air for a long moment. It felt like it was being said to the audience in part. Like, "you know what's coming, you've seen it before".
Of course, this is all speculation, but tied to my experience with the adaptation none the less. I use this thought as an example of cool experiences or neat details people noticed or have built into their headcanon. Perhaps they are less talked about, more objective details. I'd love to hear about them!
Another detail I noticed in Part 1 was the Space Guild Heighliner. It doesn't operate like in the books or other adaptations. The Heighliner in Part 1 acts as a sustained Portal between destinations. We see this clearly when the Bene Gesserit flies through. The planet in the background would take up far more of the screen. Also, it was flat-out confirmed by production designer Patrice Vermette on the Dune Pod podcast.

Connections between Part 1 and Part 2 have overt parallels.

Such as the scene in the final battle sequence where Chani fights the Sardaukar. It is not an exact recreation, but a very close match to Paul's vision in Part 1. In the vision, he saw himself. In reality, it was Chani. It visually establishes that Paul's visions were not perfect in Part 1. This is to contrast the clarity of vision he obtains after consuming the water of life. This was done as foreshadowing for the connection between Paul's vision of Chani in Part 2. Obvious to anyone who has read Messiah.
Combined the scenes for reference: https://x.com/Solahmi_/status/1777108950829383778
A less overt connection is one I thought about today while listening to the Part 2 OST. If you haven't watched Thomas Flight's video on the breakdown of Part 1, I recommend doing so now. https://youtu.be/P50VrsM_xlU Specifically, the 5:45 timestamp is relevant for this discussion. The track used for "Paul's journey" is titled Herald of the Change. Keep that track in mind. Specifically the part at the beginning with the the duduk. In Part 2, as the fight between Paul and Feyd comes to its climax, the same section from Herald of the Change plays. The section when Paul was receiving an education about Arrakis and the Fremen from a film book. Now it was being used again, intentionally so. But why? Another important detail here is that the duduk is playing along side the iconic Octobass lines that represents Paul's KH status. The grungy, dirty, dark, malicious tones that signifies his awakened mind in all its terror. That combination makes me think this combination invokes Paul teaching the first of many brutal lessons. Paul heralding in a radical change that will be recorded in the history books to be read to future generations. When listening to Herald of the Change again, I realized for the first time that the Octobass, Paul's KH status, was teased all the way at the beginning of Part 1, directly before being tested by Reverend Mother Mohiam.
These movies are so damn cool.
Anyone have stuff they'd like to contribute? or discuss the ones I've mentioned?

One thing that I was thinking about the other day while I was at my brother's house playing was that pink wasn't a color in the color wheel. at the same time, you could say that a red/white deck would be a pink deck. this was only because my SIL's favorite color was pink.
So I quickly thought of what pink's mechanics would be based around. which got me thinking that a pink deck should be about slowing the pace of the game down, while also pumping up pink until it does damage. a long-term type of deck that doesn't quite snowballs, but instead scales higher and higher. I think that a blue deck is similar, but the idea isn't to counter spell, but to cast spells that can stun creatures, and is essentially a celestial type of color.
one concept that I was thinking of was the idea that there would be a spell that could skip your opponent's turn. tying into the celestial type of way that this deck would work would be that it controls the mechanics of the game rather than playing against your opponent's cards. or maybe there's a card that won't let your opponent untap their mana on their next turn, or a spell that targeted your opponent's draw phase.
with this I decided to call the land type, "Sky," in an effort to tie in the theme to the cards.
and then I thought, well if this concept would be too overpowered, there should be a color that would counter this type of deck, and I decided to invent the purple deck as a semi-direct counter to pink.
Purple would have a spell shield identity to it. where most spells cast on a purple deck would have no effect. purple would be the barrier between man and the sky. So I decided that purple would have the land type of "Storm," as its mana.
with this, I decided that the mechanics of the purple deck would be that of punishing those that attack the purple deck. so there would be lightning charges attached to purple cards that would inevitably smite creatures that attack purple decks. while also being safe from spells that would cause the purple deck to falter. at the same time, a color has to be balanced, so the creatures in a purple deck wouldn't have high toughness. so steam rolling a purple deck is the best way to go with more powerful creatures, but beware that attacking a purple deck is always a double edged sword.
a concept for a purple deck mechanic is that as your opponents' monsters build up charges, and those charges go over the toughness of that creature, it would instantly be smote, and then be sent to the graveyard. ways to build up charges would be if the creature has attacked, and there's an artifact that will grant charges, or if there's a monster with an electric charge, then it would put a charge token onto the opponent's creature. in order for that creature to be smote though, there would have to be a spell, creature, or an artifact that does that in play.
I'm sure that there would be ways to play against this type of synergy in the future, but imagine these concepts with all of the other colors. like a storm/island deck that claps a sky/plains deck or something.
https://preview.redd.it/ovbd1fspl41d1.png?width=457&format=png&auto=webp&s=252335fe24ee3fba87964ad699a33ade9f6c0422
I also created concept mana to try and get a feel for how this was playing out in my head. it would definitely add a lot more complexity to deck building though. so it's kind of niche to think about actually doing something like this.

The Fall Least Unexpected
Camp Wapiti was the most competitive summer-camp on the western border of the Allegheny Mountains, titular for the raving children’s testimonies by the end of the season. An influx of young campers had signed up this year to roost in forests of Red Spruce and Eastern Hemlock. The camp had reportedly gone through a series of expansion, including state-of-the-art “lodging enclaves” and an Olympic-sized swimming pool; at least according to the Wapiti parent Facebook Group. Rah-rah Elks!

A slew of bus rentals carries the kids to the gates of the 150-acre property, summer reveries already taking effect on everyone - from the bus drivers to the happy campers. The counselors had done a splendid job in garbing under the theme of Swan Lake, tinges of pastel pink and candlelight establishing the camp’s timbre; all awaited returning and new faces alike.

Once they reached, a horde of children spilled out from vehicles from all directions. The season had started.

“Welcome to Camp Wapiti our future outdoorsmen and adventurers! Plenty of secrets and fun await you this year - but first some rules…” bellowed Hailey Clifton, head counselor of the ensemble and youngest chick among the staff. The other counselors rolled their eyes during Hailey’s yearly pitch about showing a high level of care towards the surrounding wilderness and carrying the Happy Camper’s Guide to Nature: Dynamite Deciduous at all times. Many of the children began fidgeting, a crowd of creepy-crawlers wiggling underneath the heat vortex and swarm of mosquitos.

Finally, a cool breeze could be felt as Hailey finished off, invigorating everybody’s spirits once again. Campers and counselors drifted off into their own respective circles, reuniting with old friends and meeting new ones, breathing life and community into the grounds. Already burnt bodies sticky from chlorine and Sun-Bum were packed like sardine and people of all ages hollered from the tree-tops.

The first afternoon and night had been a success in every sense of the word. Residents were comatose within their cabins before 10 pm, in anticipation for a day at Lake Dimii in the morning. Somebody was dreaming of the unmarred lake and its magical properties according to the Iroquois, at any given moment during the night.

Come morning, camp was bustling with movement in every corner. Louie, an independent, fire-cracker 11-year-old from Brooklyn led a large pack of his well-rested peers to the lake. The other kids couldn’t help but look up to Louie, who was often disinterested in the bull of the others, but who was also the first person someone would ask for help in messing with the counselors or sneaking into the girl’s dorm at night. The children sang Wapiti’s jingle on their trek:

We are the happy herd of elks
Roaming through the fields with stealth!
On our crow’s nest seat,
We are the Camp Wapiti fleet!

The children’s chants could be heard reverberating through the wood, like a canyon wall is to singing birds. The menagerie cannonballed into the lake from all perimeters, the counselors struggling to keep up. But the day swelled with happiness as the surroundings looked effervescent within the sunlight, everything appeared to be cast underneath a yellow, sparkly film. After head-check, Hailey could finally record the potpourri of foreign flowers in her scrapbook.

Michel Barre and his two most loyal pals, Barnett and Sal, were camped away from the others, scoffing at the troupe of wildlings swimming in the waters. Michel, son of hot-shot French socialites, had moved to the North-East just two years ago, and still couldn’t wrap his mind around the hobbies and traditions of American kids his age; especially the dreaded capture the flag. The counselors had attempted to urge the three to join the others in the water, coaxing them with extra pie during dessert, but with no luck.

Traditionally, the first few days of camp were a hedonistic blur with no planned activities or events. Counselors encouraged to introduce themselves with one another and become comfortable with their bunk-mates especially. After a blistering day in the heat at Dimii, the whole lot was absolutely worn-out and immediately returned to their quarters following a hearty meal of chicken fried steak and apple pie fritters. Another day of sunshine and splashing around in the surf awaited everybody tomorrow, with a round of softball and soft serve afterwards. Even Michel felt a knot of excitement grow in his stomach.

Yet at half-past three in the morning, just two remained awake. As the moon’s image was reflected upon the lake’s surface while the others peacefully slept, Michel had been awoken and dragged by his feet out of his bed, across floorboards punctuated with nails, and out into the night. He was dragged for what seemed like hours. Across the gravel, dirt, and bushes, his skin was battered, and his limbs mangled. He contained no mental or physical capacity to identify who on God’s Earth was forcing him through his misery.

After a while, Michel could discern a certain atmospheric change - the air had felt more serene - what could only be Lake Dimii.

SWIM AT YOUR OWN RISK “NO LIFEGUARD”

• Read a wasted sign, torn at its hinges.

“Please, I'm so sorry for whatever I did - please don’t-” Michel’s captor continued on to the edge of the lake and held him there, his face inundated like a trembling leaf caught in a storm. Michel didn’t know how to swim and tried to remember what his camping guide said about situations like this, but his mind went blank, and his lungs burned.

A passerby would be able to make out the two figures easily, even though the humid mist: One submerged and one forcing its grasp on the nape of the other’s neck, calmly watching. Michel was so incapacitated he wasn’t even aware that he was being forcibly held - he only regretted refusing to take swimming lessons as a child. And now his despairing amount of weakness against the dark waters was apparent. He thrashed about like a wild animal, a trail of bubbles circling his head. Gasps and sunken murmurs were the only sounds that could be heard on the lakeside at this hour.

And the other continued to watch, looking almost disinterested in the slump of his shoulders and the swaying of his feet. The moon still stubbornly shone, indiscriminate in its gleam, illuminating the other boy’s poor, sinking body. The scene was now still - a sharp contrast from a mere 8 hours ago.

The one on the bank turned to leave for the campgrounds, whistling a familiar tune.
The amount of time it takes to notice a person is missing is usually longer than one would think. In the case of Michel Barre, it took nearly 2 hours after the inhabitants of Wapiti rose. Barnett and Sal eventually realized that Michel was nowhere to be found and alerted Hailey before they were blamed for something they didn’t do. All campers were to report back to their bunks immediately for the rest of the day and stay there till instructed otherwise. A wave of confusion and frustration hit the camp – and rumors quickly spread like a nasty bout of lice.

According to the older kids, Barnett and Sal were messing around with Michel in the woods and left him there for inexplicable reasons. Others believed that Michel’s mega-loaded parents airlifted him out of the woods after just a few hours sleeping in the itchy twin sheets.

Meanwhile, in the counselor’s lodge, absolute pandemonium had settled alongside the cabin’s perpetual dust. These ‘designated adults’ were not adults at all, but hormonal, dewy-eyed teenagers who had been looking forward to an unsupervised summer. None of them were prepared for a situation like this.

“How on Earth will we ever explain this to Michel’s parents? The poor boy - he is probably wounded in the middle of the forest somewhere. Who knows, he could already be dead right now,” cried Hailey. The others stared at her blankly, not knowing what to say in response.

Javon Scott, who was only there for the massive paycheck that would hit his bank account at the end of the summer, couldn’t stop concentrating on Hailey's strawberry-blond curls. They smelled like apples.

“Hailey’s right, guys. Michel’s probably dead somewhere in a ditch. Shit, I can’t handle this right now, I need to smoke,” said Javon. He couldn’t keep his legs from bouncing, even with two hands on his thighs. Hailey let out a dry sob.

“You’ve been smoking too much Javon. The kid is probably fine, he couldn’t have made it that far into the woods,” chimed in someone from the back. A few other counselors murmured in agreement.

“We can’t bank on that. We have to tell Michel’s parents and call the authorities,” said Hailey. Javon aggressively nodded his head - the only one out of the bunch to agree.

“Like the cops? No way, I like this gig and my parents would murder me. Let’s all just split up and try to find him first,” said Bryce, one of the older counselors, a local town bum. There seemed to be a consensus already made at that point and all of Hailey's lamentations were paid any further attention.

The teens decided on rounding up the campers towards the center of the ground for the remainder of the day and to keep guard for God-knows-what, while the rest divvied up the surrounding woods in sections to search for the missing boy. Seemingly overnight, Camp Wapiti had transformed into a dire place – a canvas of frantic people and an obscure disappearance coloring the air.
Hailey had volunteered to scale the one of many huge rocks overlooking the eastern corner of the camp, a citadel over the surrounding area. Javon had offered to accompany Hailey, but everyone agreed it would be best if he stayed out at camp and watched over the fidgety kids. Javon grumbled about his role, because the last thing he wanted to do was spend the rest of the day with the snotty-sits, but he was sorely outnumbered. Besides, Hailey wanted to be alone.

The rock sat among the treetops, overlooking miles beyond the peripheries of the camp in each direction. It was a hot spot for late-night hookups, summertime dares, and sunrise viewings. Some of the graffiti that marked the base of the rock was almost two generations old.

It took a good 20 minutes for Hailey to reach the peak. Once she did, she was taken aback at the unstable illusion that was presented - the forest and vegetation seemed to have no end, swallowing all the land in its vastness. She shuddered to think where Michel could be within the thickets, as there was no way she could make out a 9-year-old from this vantage point. Her day had been spent in vain.

She plopped down at the edge of the overlook and began to burst into fitful tears. She couldn’t even begin to imagine how scared Michel was. Her stomach felt like a bowling ball. She decided that she would immediately contact the Allegheny preservative police and Michel’s parents before telling the others. She took in the horizon for a few months, ablaze in a deep mandarin, before heading back to Wapiti.

Except, someone had been watching her and her lovely head full of curls for a while now. It was a quite pleasant evening, and a single sight was more like a shout in the dead silence. And so, when Hailey could hear the heavy breathing of someone behind her, she chose not to stir.

“I know that’s you Javon. Look, I don’t have the time for this right now,” said Hailey, sniffling into her hands. Only silence followed and the breathing now ceased. Hailey looked over her shoulders and saw only rock. She felt as if she were becoming progressively crazier as the day went on.

Hailey turned back to stare at the view. And as she tumbled down the face of the cliff - from a single push or a gust of wind, no one would be able to tell - her last thoughts were of Michel’s ill-fated end instead of hers and how beautiful the sea of green looked when falling. Down, down she went, impaled upon the serrated end of a branch. Dark, gelatinous fluid sprayed from where she was impaled. She writhed in agony for thirty long minutes before her organs failed from the fatal amount of blood that was lost to the forest dirt.
By 10 pm, all of the inhabitants were united, and unlike this morning, there was a noticeable absence in the atmosphere. With the chief counselor nowhere to be found, the modus operandi of the camp had been altered. Campers were ordered to stay in their cabins and to not leave under any circumstances. Most of the counselors themselves hunkered in their bunks, too exhausted to search for yet another missing person or were a little paranoid themselves. Besides, Hailey probably bailed on the rest of them to avoid being complicit in anything that anything might have happened to Michel.

Still, a few agreed it was best to search the immediate vicinity at least once more, including Javon, who hadn’t felt this terrible since his parent’s divorce.

The crag wasn’t too far from the camp and so when five odd teenagers stumbled upon the grisly sight that was the remains of their fellow counselor – with what the forest scavengers had made of the relatively fresh carcass anyways - a wave of nausea and hysteria hit the group. Two immediately ran straight backwards towards the lodges, escaping into the night.

Javon stood within the fetid odor of the body, unable to take his eyes off the ravage in front of him. Tears silently raced down his cheek. The Allegheny Mountains had turned into an inescapable hellscape paradox.

The remaining counselors turned to wake and alert the others, concluding that the only possible explanation was that Hailey had tumbled from a rock. Javon contested this theory, adamant foul play was involved, but like always, he was ignored. Hailey’s body was left alone, and Camp Wapiti was bustling in panic for the second time that day, except everyone knew what had happened to Hailey. And now with the bus rentals back already less than 96 hours, followed by a parade of police forces, the warmth of the season had disappeared just as quickly it had come.

There simply weren’t enough buses available to transport the entire camp’s population in one batch, especially considering the time of night. The kids were priority and were bused off the premises as soon as possible, except for around two dozen. The police rounded everyone else - which included all the counselors – into the canteen, dead-center of the campsite.

By 6 AM, Javon had become sick of his environment and everyone in it. No one had been able to sleep the whole night except the police, who were used to sleeping in their patrol cars. A distinct tenor could be felt in the canteen, not a soul felt safe during those 9 dreadful hours.

Louie – the Brooklyn boy – entertained some of the other kids by reciting gruesome renditions of what could have happened to Michel and Hailey. The kids took morbid interest, looking over their shoulders for the monsters in Louie’s reenactments. A detailed sketch had been made of the killer. The kids described him as like the silent Northern Saw-Whet Owl, camouflaging within the dark envelope of the forest.

Javon snuck off into the sunrise to go smoke a joint in the hammock park behind the canteen, in plain view of the swarm of knocked-out cops. His nerves were in desperate need of soothing and he didn’t need to think twice about using the only medicine at hand.

The sunrise was dim and sullen, casting its gray halo throughout the sky. The hammock swayed slightly from the cool morning breeze and Javon was starting to get a little sick. Images of Hailey had been burned into his subconscious and he wondered how he would ever be able to sleep again. Well, not sober at least.

Javon could care less about the “owl” killer if he were staring at the end of its barrel, he just needed to forget about this place. This was the first time he had regretted not filling out college application forms, because now, he couldn’t escape this town even if he tried.

As he continued to ruminate in his limited prospects, he saw a shadow flit from the corner of his eye. He jolted awake from his existential morning thoughts.

It was a rather small shadow, one that emerged like a premature lightning strike. The figure disappeared into the woods – seemingly spawning from the direction of the cabins. Snuffing his joint, Javon waltzed in the shadow’s path, determined to not let the sly thing get away. The police were starting to stir. Javon dashed into the thicket’s cover.

While the figure had been in full sprint before, Javon had caught up to it within a couple of minutes. From behind a tree, looking onto an unobstructed clearing, there was the silhouette, his back facing Javon.

It was a boy. A shirtless boy. Quiet and unmoving. But Javon could easily recognize the person’s gait – strangely self-assured for just an 11-year-old. No doubt it was Louie, unruly, scraped and bruised, swaggering within late dawn’s mist. Javon observed quietly for a few moments, watching the boy sit in silence in the grass.

Louie knew someone was watching him. Besides, he had been on the other side – the one who was hunting the unsuspecting so many times that his instincts were deceivingly sharp. Louie turned his head around slowly, catching Javon’s direct line of vision and holding it. Javon froze under Louie’s blank expression towards him.

Slowly, Louie made his way towards Javon, carefully maintaining eye contact. Javon was almost in some sort of trance and had been. rendered immobile. Louie started to quicken his pace, opening his mouth to say something before Javon snapped out of his terrifying reverie.

Javon’s paranoia was through the roof, fueled by all that weed he consumed on an empty stomach. He ran towards the cabin for dear life to warn the others, convinced of Louie’s hand in evil. Something about Louie’s vacant eyes, devoid of emotion and almost-artificial like, sent Javon reeling for shelter from that empty expression. Even Hailey’s lifeless face exhibited more human-ness.

He finally had enough courage to look behind him when in view of the canteen, only to be met with a silent wood. Nevertheless, he continued to run, right outside to the main grounds, running right smack into the punchy gut of a cop.

“Do you think you can tell me what you are doing out here, hm,” asked the man in faded blue. Javon relayed his morning, leaving out extraneous details. But what he said fell upon empty ears and a boisterous laugh!

“Hmph, you kids sure aren’t meant to be out here as counselors. Clueless, all of you.”

But the police soon realized that Javon was telling the cold truth. Louie was thought to be on the busses, but the police received word that the boy was nowhere to be found in the vehicles. A small search-party was sent into the woods, but there wasn’t a single trace of an 11-year-old to be found. Only a lumbering 21-year-old, who took embarrassingly long strides.
Louie and his belongings had dematerialized along with warm winds of summer.

As the rest of the kids and counselors were sent away through a second round of buses, Javon looked longingly at the shrinking campgrounds from the back window.

On our crow’s nest seat,
We are the Camp Wapiti fleet!

Javon dreamt of distant heights and killer elks for months after the incidents.

I (56M) and my daughter (28F) just finished our first trip to Universal. Sitting at MCO here's a few ofy thoughts.
Accommodation: we were at the Portofino, Bay View room. I knew there would be construction so was prepared for that but we ended up in the East Side and had no issues at all. I didn't eat at the hotel so can't comment much about it, but it was clean and I have no complaints.
The hotel included express passes and these were embarrassingly good. I felt bad for all those we strolled past on every ride. With the exception of Hagrid's we never had more than a 20 minute wait.
We arrived at the hotel at midday Tuesday and we're given early access to the room which was great. However there was a storm forecast so the river taxi was initially suspended. We decided to walk but it was absolutely pouring by the time we got as far as the Hard Rock hotel so we sheltered in there and decided to stay for lunch.
By the time we got to the park it was about 2pm and both parks were closing at 6pm so we stayed in Studios and did everything we wanted to except ET which was closed until Thursday.
Horror Makeup Show was good, particularly as it is something my daughter has been involved with in the past, but not something I'd do twice.
Simpson's Ride was OK, I was quite impressed with the experience but my daughter suffered a bit of motion sickness on this one and we didn't do it again.
Men In Black was a lot of fun, we did this twice during our stay and I would have happily done it again. It never seemed to get busy and was a good escape from weather.
Although not a ride, we did find the whole Diagon Alley area to be extremely well themed, better even than Hogsmeade.
Escape from Gringotts was really good, probably the best 3D simulator. This was another ride we repeated.
Revenge of the Mummy was probably our favourite indoor ride, I think we did this three times and it was the most thrilling of the indoor rides.
Rip Ride Rocket was the final ride on the first day and we really loved it. The only problem was our song choice, something we fixed subsequently.
We did make use of the river taxi the rest of the stay and that was really useful.
The rest of the week we had park to park with express of course so I can't remember the exact sequence. We just took our time and did everything we wanted to.
Bourne Stuntacula was excellent, so good we went a second time during the week.
Transformers was OK, but didn't seem to have a good story, probably our least favourite of the 3D rides.
Fast and Furious was fun, not as terrible as many on this sub say, there was little wait time when other rides were busy so fit that gap.
King Kong is essentially the same equipment as F&F but a much better story and visuals, so better for that.
Spiderman was similar equipment to Transformers, but again a better story and so this one we repeated.
Forbidden Journey is a great experience, including the queueing area, we even took one trip through the standard line because the express line missed some things. Not quite as thrilling as Mummy and lacking the 3D experience of Gringotts, but excellent transitions between screen and physical effects.
Hagrid's is an amazing ride, unlike anything else we experienced. However, as an express pass holder I couldn't justify doing it more than once, it's such a time suck. To be fair we did not use early access, but even then there was a lot of queueing outside the park. We waited an hour and that was the lowest we saw it at the times we were in the park.
Flight of the Hippogriff is made for children, we were too big to enjoy it I think.
Velocicoaster was our favourite ride, and the express pass was really handy, we were able to do it three times without having to plan for particular times.
River Adventure was our favourite water ride, really good visuals leading up to the drop, but I won't give any spoilers.
Ripsaw Falls was OK but we did get absolutely drenched even before the end. It seems the whole experience is just about getting as wet as possible without any real story.
Dr Dooms Fearfall is just too short, it is what you'd expect but I can't imagine queueing very long for it.
Hulk is another great coaster. It certainly can rattle your head but we knew that. I would have liked it to be a little longer, that's what ranked it lower than Rockit and Velocicoaster.
ET did open yesterday and I'm glad we did it, but it wasn't really something for us and better suited to kids.
TLDR: we went for 3 days, had express pass which was amazing. Top 5 rides for us were:

1. Velocicoaster
2. Rip Ride Rocket (Sandstorm sound track!)
3. Revenge of the Mummy
4. Hulk
5. Gringotts

Honorable mention for Forbidden Journey for the experience and Hagrid's if it had an express pass lane.

So for a while or so I've been playing older Sonic games just to see if they still held up. So far a majority of the games I played were at the very least good with some of the best ones being Sonic Adventure 2 and Sonic rush. But something that might be my biggest Sonic hot take ever is that Heroes is one of the worst games in the entire Sonic series(unpopular opinion I know but let me explain myself). And just a heads up this is gonna be a long one because I got a lot to say about this game.
Because this game has a lot of aspects that I don’t like, I'm going to first touch on some aspects I actually like about the game. Even though not every character was written the best I will say some stand out characters I enjoyed are Cream and Omega, especially Omega but I wanna touch on Cream first. Ever since reading the IDW comics I've always had a soft spot for Cream just from how innocent and adorable she was and that sentiment continued with how she was paired with Blaze in Sonic Rush. I was admittedly nervous about how she would be portrayed in Heroes for reasons I'll get into later but she was handled alright. Nothing too groundbreaking but she kept her cute nature and even had some small moments of sass which was nice. The real star of the show was E-123 Omega. He really only has one thing on his mind with destroying Eggman and doesn’t really go through any sort of character arc, but that’s fine with me because the dude’s funny as hell with how aggressive and angry he is. He doesn’t have much of a face or eyes that are able to emote but you can still tell exactly what he’s thinking. I can’t explain why but every piece of dialogue that comes out of his…mouth?....speakers?...is hysterical. From “ANNIHILATE” to “USELESS CONSUMER MODELS” even down to when he says “GOOD” every time you pop an item box or balloon every quote is comedy gold with how monotone his voice is. The chemistry each team has with each other is nice to watch since from their dialogue you can tell that these trios have known each other for a while, are good friends with one another, or in Team Dark’s case just work friends(but their banter is still entertaining with how Omega keeps telling them to stay focused). And the music is good but as a Sonic fan that’s par for the course at this point. What I’m Made Of is a stand out banger for me.
But unfortunately that’s where all the positives end as we move into the negatives with one of the biggest being the physics of the game being poorly optimized. Throughout my playthrough I have run into so many bugs or victims of poor game design that I’ve lost count. But over half of my deaths have been due to the fact that there are no invisible walls to act as safety nets for players incase they misclick or even do something as simple as do a homing attack or perform a 3 hit combo with a power character, the latter happening way too often because power characters are the most reliable way to deal with enemies. Enemies bumping you are also a common way to die but not because of running out or rings, but because of the lack of walls keeping you on the platforms. Speaking of the homing attack, with how the movement physics work with speed characters I never use them because they end up being too slippery to control with instances where it feels like I'm fighting for control just so I can move forward in a straight line or hit a boost pad on a loop. The Light Speed Dash works whenever it feels like it and there’s no way to aim the homing attack so you pretty much have to press A twice and pray that rn-Jesus does you nice, otherwise you’re falling down a pit like you’re Scrooge McDuck diving into a vault of gold coins. And remember how I said enemies bumping you off cliffs was a common way to die? Well they can also just combo you for free because this game has no invincibility frames meaning you can get hit once and then instantly die if you or one of your teammates doesn’t pick up a ring right after being hit. This is especially apparent in horde fights like Robot Storm where you can get easily swarmed. And a staple mechanic from Sonic Adventure 2 that was butchered in this followup was the rail grinding. It was super fun to build up speed by balancing and crouching but now you just mash B with any real sense of speed being from a speed character. And heaven forbid you decided to grind rail with a flight character unless you like sliding at the speed of a snail, but you might wanna do that anyway to be save because if you switch rails the game doesn’t magnetize your character to it risking you to just shoot yourself off the map just for swapping rails or getting off of a rail.
Another awful aspect with the game is the team mechanic itself. It’s an interesting idea on paper to be able to swap between 3 characters to perform different actions based on what the level throws at you. But the problem with that is not every formation is balanced. The flying formation is awful in every way. The totem formation itself looks weird and looks especially janky with how it looks when going off a set of springs or going through a dash panel loop. How it controls itself makes absolutely no sense either; you jump and jump again to fly which drains a meter, which makes sense since Tails worked in a similar way back in Sonic 2 and still works like that in every other 2D classic style game. But I didn’t learn until the last story that the gauge only drains if you move forwards and won’t drain if you don’t move forward which not only makes no sense but doesn’t work like that in Sonic 2 at all. And whenever the meter runs out you might think that you would just glide down to the floor right? No. Instead the game halts all of your momentum and has you fall straight down like a boulder making flying based platforming impossible which was not the case in Sonic 2. And for some reason there’s a limit for how high you can go even though there’s already a limit you can fly for. Wanna know what game allows you to fly as long as you want until you run out of stamina? SONIC FUCKING 2 ON THE SEGA GENESIS/MEGA DRIVE. Sonic Heroes not only came out 10 years after Sonic 2 but was released on more powerful consoles so I'm baffled that they didn’t even try to make any of this shit work in any similar fashion. And this gets even worse for Sonic Heroes because you know how I just described how they would have improved the flying mechanics in Sonic Heroes? Well it WORKS EXACTLY HOW I JUST EXPLAINED IN SONIC ADVENTURE FOR THE THE DREAMCAST 1999. What the hell were they thinking with this!? This makes absolutely no fucking sense. And the Thunder Shoot attack? It doesn’t do much except paralyze enemies and hit targets meant to help you move forward in levels. Except it only does one of these things correctly since the game doesn’t auto target the targets meaning 90% of the time you’ll be constantly throwing your teammates into the ether while missing entirely as you try again and again to change your angle to hit the target just so you can move on with the average 10 minute level. And the switches you’re meant to pull are janky in their own right but the switches you have to fly for are the worst since no matter how close you get to that switch the game won’t register what you’re trying to do which is annoying as balls. And as the finishing touch all flying character have no differences in gameplay despite slight animations and apparently they have this unique attack they can do if they don’t have party members to throw with Thunder Shoot by pressing B again...but the game doesn’t tell you that and even knew that you’ll never see it in practice because if you toss a teammate with Thunder Shoot they’ll come back almost instantly.
And the biggest failure is that you can no longer spin dash in this game. It’s no big deal, it’s not like they removed one of Sonic’s most essential moves in his arsenal that was present all the way from Sonic 2 and was even in Sonic Adventure 1 and 2, useless crap like that. Instead you have to use the stupid Rocket Accel which can’t be activated instantly like the spin dash with instead having the player get a running start to have your teammate boost you forward that doesn’t go as far as the spin dash in Sonic Adventure 1 and 2. It’s an alright concept that would be fine to keep if the spin dash remained in the game and not replaced with some trash faker that doesn’t hold up to the original. Which leaves us with the power formation which is the best formation by far but not by much. Power is the easiest one to control since it allows you to properly control your character at a moderate speed, a novel concept I know. But combo attacks that involve the character moving forward in a short burst are risky to use since you could wind up pushing yourself off the map which happens way more often than you’d think and more often than it should. And because they have to share data with all the playable teams they away Knuckles’ ability to climb walls in favor of a tacky looking team glide for platforming just like they took away the Spin Dash.
Another team related mechanic the game introduces is something called the “Team Blast” which has a gauge fill up every time you deal damage to enemies or collect rings no matter how you collect said rings(remember this for later). When a team gauge is filled you can perform a Team Blast by pressing Z that acts as a screen wipe that clears almost every enemy on screen. I say almost because it doesn’t really remove every enemy on screen because some doof over at Sonic Team thought it would be a good idea to give an ultimate attack that’s meant to wipe out all enemies on screen with a limited range, which is smaller than you’d think by the way. Each Team Blast has their own special effect that appears for around 10 seconds after the attack is used which i’ll be talking about when I talk about each team on their own but know that after Team Sonic’s Team Blast Sonic will be able to use the Light Speed Attack from Adventure 1 and 2…but that’s useless when you’re able to still fight as Knuckles and it fucks up your Thunder Shoot when attacking bosses.
And the next fancy mechanic they try adding in is the new level system. And I hate this system so much. The idea of the level system is that your character starts off dealing an ok amount of damage but can get stronger the more you level up by collecting orbs that can drop from enemies. Speed characters get a stronger spin dash, flight characters get a stronger Thunder Shoot, and power characters get stronger combo enders. The problem is that in terms of combat no Sonic game has ever worked like this. For the most part every enemy in a Sonic game that came out before and after Heroes is able to be one shot by a simple jump, roll, spin dash, homing attack, mech shot, boost or punch with the only exceptions I can name off the top of my head being Sonic Rush, Sonic Unleashed’s night stages, and Sonic Frontiers. But those 3 examples are excusable since with Rush it’s only one enemy that has more than 1 HP that doesn’t spawn often and with the other 2 being based more on combat than speeding through levels as fast as possible. Your team will only be satisfying to play after everyone as at the maximum level of level 3 which can be difficult to do since whichever orbs enemies drop when defeated are not only random for when exactly they’ll drop but it’s also completely random who the level up is meant for. Imagine needing to level up your power character to get through a large horde of enemies but instead all the levels go to the other 2 teammates that are virtually useless in a fight. “Ah dammit, I needed a power orb to get to level 2…ah well might as well give my other teammates their 50th orb of the fight.” The only ways to get guaranteed levels for a certain character is with certain item boxes and balloons scattered throughout the level and with checkpoints but the latter only works for the character leading the formation when touching the checkpoint, not to mention they’re single use only. And say you grinded all those levels so you can blitz through this level, guess what, if you die all of your levels get reset and it doesn’t matter if you only lose a life or game over. And i’ve made it very clear how easy it is to unintentionally kill yourself in this game.
Something else that isn’t properly explained is the hidden difficulty system. The problem is that each team campaign has a hidden difficulty system but the game doesn’t tell you that at all unless you want to willingly listen to Omochao(note that I played the tutorial and afterwards I actively avoided his tips on the main menu). The difficulty from easy to hard is Teams Rose, Sonic, Dark, and Chaotix being a gimmick team but the game orders them from Sonic, Dark, Rose, Chaotix which is bad game design because not only are people gonna wanna play as the main character Sonic the Hedgehog, but with how the stories are laid out players would instinctively play from left to right causing them to play the game on normal, hard, easy, and then gimmick which doesn’t make too much sense. I knew the difficulty levels before going in but I played in order of Sonic, Rose, Dark, Chaotix because I like Sonic as a character. But what I wasn’t prepared for is that this game is kinda hard even on the normal difficulty because the game is full of jank that can just kill you for playing the game as intended.
But now for Team Rose and Team Dark. Team Rose is so piss easy that it’s insulting for players who are well affirmed with the series. For one they force you to play the tutorial even after you’ve completed a story previously. Which btw this is the most bullshit tutorial in the history of gaming. Most games have pop ups with button commands and visuals to help the player out or they let the player figure things out themselves. Sonic Heroes does neither of these but instead have this little annoying ass robotic fuck hold your hand throughout the entire thing. What makes this worse is that every time he pops up to tell you what to do your character is stuck in place as you gotta wait for him to shut up so you can play the game only for you to be stopped by his rambling again and again and again until it’s finally over. And most of the skills players can learn on their own since it’s not that hard to just press a random button and get immediate feedback of “oh this button does this? cool beans''. Their moveset is also broken with Amy’s tornado attack being a moving projectile meaning you don’t have to willingly get in contact with the enemy in order to use it, Big having a combo that doesn’t have him move so he can’t fall off the map along with a broken belly flop that’s good for not only combat but weirdly enough platforming, and Cream…she’s just the flier. Their Team Blast is just a win button for no good reason. Not only does it give all of your teammates a free level, not only does it give your team a shield, but it makes your entire team INVINCIBLE. Ok game I get it, stop treating me like a baby. And the finishing touch is that all the levels are cut in half. Awesome. Setting up unrealistic expectations for newcomers and disrespecting older players in one foul swoop.
And then there’s Team Dark…oh Team Dark…when they said this was the “hard” mode they were lying. Because it should’ve been called “kaizo” mode. Enemies are everywhere including places they shouldn’t be, the amount of rings available is greatly reduced, And the bosses become borderline impossible to beat at times(except for the rival fights but we’ll get to that). And not only are there more enemies but the stronger variants of said enemies spawn more frequently. And you’d think their Team Blast would make things better, well yes and no but here’s why. Their Team Blast freezes time completely and I mean completely. Rings don’t spin, projectiles don’t move, even the timer doesn’t tick down. But the most annoying part is if you’re using your Team Blast to try and move forward the puzzles are stuck in time too until the gauge runs out so you gotta sit and wait to move on. And even after you move on the game will probably toss 3 giant armored robots at you at once that fight like mini-bosses(if you know you know) immediately after your Team Blast just ran out.
But before I talk about the final team with Team Chaotix I wanna talk about the level design! Yippee! Except not really because it’s all terrible. The locations and themes are unique in their own right but each level suffers from their own issues coupled with all the bugs that can kill you outright without the player having any time to think about what just happened. Ignoring the main bugs, Seaside Hill and Ocean Palace are fine first levels in all honesty. Power Plant’s elevator section is long and tedious and it’s worse if you have a character than use the Light Speed Dash along with a super stressful rising lava section that you gotta hurry up to climb or else you’re dead. But oooh nooo it’s not that easy because the lava moves faster along with the player which means if you’re too slow, you die and if you’re too fast…you die. Casino Park and Bingo Highway have pinball mechanics that will leave you stuck in one of the tables forever unless you’re a pinball god or just lucky. And we just love games marketed at children that encourage gambling addictions, especially if said gambling minigames are rng. Rail Canyon and Bullet Station rely entirely on rails which don’t work properly as I said before and Bullet Station in particular has a cannon that’s supposed to shoot you onto another rail track but in actuality it fires you straight into the death zone if you’re unaware about this and hold forward…and because it’s a Sonic the Hedgehog game you’re gonna do that. “Gotta go fast” and all that. Frog Forest and Lost Jungle have flying flowers that are so jittery they’re impossible to control, swinging vines with an awkward timing window, and it ends on a chase sequence against a giant crocodile that relies on the janky vines that last way too long. Hang Castle and Mystic Mansion are puzzle-filled mazes with ghost enemies that show up at the worst of times to jumpscare you…which is all the time, and everything else(we all know these levels sucks moving on). Egg Fleet and Final Fortress have tons of bullshit cannons that can home in on you, can snipe you out of the air which can hit you out of a platforming segment and send you falling to your death, crumbling floors, everything’s in the sky so there’s almost no floor to stand on, and rails. The worst part about it all is that all 4 campaign’s use the same exact 14 levels. You heard me right. ALL 4 CAMPAIGNS USE THE EXACT SAME LEVELS. Sonic Adventure 2 had 2 campaigns with levels that heavily differed from each other one way or another. Each campaign has either a speed level, a treasure level, or a mech level and even then it’s not equal to how many levels each type of level gets and each level has a different setting and music track. Rush is the one case I can think of where the campaigns had minor differences. Only thing is that those differences are huge. The levels are the same but they’re in a different order for Sonic and Blaze, Blaze plays completely differently from Sonic, Blaze gets her own music tracks, and Sonic has to use special stages to get the Chaos Emeralds while Blaze doesn’t need any to get the Sol Emeralds. And at the end of every other stage you gotta face off against-
Bosses! They all suck for different reasons. The mech fights boil down to mashing homing attacks like it’s a Mario Party minigame, the rival team fights are a joke, and the horde fights…oh my god the horde fights. I’m just gonna rip the band-aid off here. ROBOT. FUCKING. STORM. This is not only the worst “level” in Sonic Heroes but the worst boss fight out of any Sonic game I have ever played. Team Sonic’s is hard enough as is, Team Rose’s is a pushover(as is every boss in their campaign really), Team Chaotix…we’ll get to them later. But Team Dark’s has to be the boss fight that throws the bullshit at you. Don’t believe me well then let’s see here, we got; a long robot gauntlet that feels like it takes years to get over with, more enemies that spawn with a lot of them being the stronger variants of the enemies we’ve already be accustomed to, multiple giant hammer wielding robots paired with either robots that heal them or robots that sap all your rings which because it’s a Sonic game it’s basically life steal, and because this game was programmed with monkeys holding hammers the enemies will constantly knock your ass off the map and there is NOTHING you can do about it except pray. Pray to rn-Jesus that you can make it out alive with what little sanity is left in your body. And after all that Eggman has the balls to say what I'd call the worst line in any Sonic game, “Don’t get too excited boys! Those were the easy ones!”. It’s genuinely unbelievable that such a level exists. This was marketed towards kids. How is fucking little Casey who just got Sonic Heroes as their first video game gonna beat this shit? He’s not. Because the developers didn’t think about that just like they didn’t think about anything in this game except making a “fun” gimmick. But that’s not all. Because there’s one more boss...
Egg Emperor…and the bullshit continues. I definitely know what true evil is when facing this boss all right. The fight consists of running across a few platforms before making your way over to a bigger arena. The boss only has 3 attacks but 2 of them are what make this boss a slog to get through. He can fire energy waves by swinging his lance like he’s Cloud Strife and a charge attack that has no weaknesses that the game says activates whenever you’re too far from him. Because this is a Sonic game I figured that meant he can only charge if you’re too slow, but if you manage to run ahead of him he’ll charge anyway. But if you get too close to him you could risk either getting hit by a lance beam or by his massive hurtbox. And you might be thinking “why don’t you homing attack the body at that point?” and that’s because he has a shield that blocks all attacks and it’s only worth attacking his body after the second part of the fight where you go to that arena section. In the arena section you have to destroy some cannons and defeat some enemies before getting to the big man himself. You can make him drop his shield by using Thunder Shoot and follow up with your Power character but you probably wouldn’t do as much damage as you were hoping for since in order to do any real damage you’ll have to level your Power character up to level 3 which could take forever in this fight. After a certain amount of time the boss will flee causing you to chase after him again and repeat the boss cycle. But don’t go too fast because then you’ll wind up smacking right into his body or he’ll swat you out the air like a fly with a lance beam attack. And you can’t go too slow or else he’ll just charge at you which if he does it at the wrong time he can intercept your approach and boop you off the map meaning you’ll be dead. And if you thought that was enough, because the developers don’t know how to properly make things different between campaigns you have to fight this motherfucker 4 SEPARATE TIMES. And it doesn’t matter what campaign you go through because you’ll always have a tough time regardless of difficulty. I know it’s the final boss and that it’s meant to be a challenge but holy shit tone it down, there’s kids playing this shit.
And the last campaign involves Team Chaotix and they’re by far my favorite team to play as…and they still have problems. Instead of going through levels the same way you did 3 separate times already it instead focuses on missions. And I have mixed feelings about this. It’s great because it finally keeps things fresh and gives the player another way to experience the game that isn’t platforming focused. The problem is the fact that it’s still the same levels, levels that were meant for an action platformer instead of things finding an x amount of…I don’t know seashells. While the treasure hunting stages were my least favorite aspect of Sonic Adventure 2 they at least did a better job with the concept than some of the collecting missions in Heroes since the maps are built specifically for this kind of gameplay and there was at least a tracker telling you if you were going in the right direction. The Chaotix has you searching through levels you’re meant to speed through while not giving you any sort of tracker to tell you if you’re in the right direction. The Casino Park one in particular was the worst one because of the instructions: “Win 200 Rings!”. Anyone who sees this probably assumes they mean to use the slot machines since we’re a casino level with slot machines built into the pinball tables. But the thing is you can easily just collect 200 rings by playing the stage. But the game doesn’t say collect 200 rings, it says win 200 rings which is the dumbest piece of misinformation in this game and that’s saying something since this game loves to withhold information from the player for no reason. Like did you know you can fire your Thunder Shoot at nothing to charge your team gauge? Or that even though the game says to use a Speed character’s tornado to deal with shield enemies Power characters can punch right through them no problem? You probably didn’t because the game doesn’t tell you this. Anyway the stealth missions are the best ones because Espio’s invisibility is broken. And their Team Blast causes any enemy destroyed to turn into rings and for the duration of the meter any enemy destroyed turns into rings. This is the most broken move in the game. Why? Well remember when I said that the Team Gauge charges from attacking enemies and collecting rings? Well the game counts any rings collected towards the meter. Meaning if you destroy enough enemies at once with this attack you can immediately get your gauge back to repeatedly use again and again. It’s such an easy exploit to pull off that I'm not even surprised that this was left unchecked in all honesty. It even makes the dreaded Robot Storm look like a joke.
So that’s it. You beat all the 4 campaigns and you’d think that it’s time for the usual last story, right?...right? Well unfortunately special stages make a return and with that the 7 Chaos Emeralds. And this is by far the worst one. In the past special stages were unlocked by method of holding at least 50 rings until the end of the stage and jumping into a warp ring in Sonic 1 or holding at least 50 rings and jumping into a star post in Sonic 2 or by jumping into a giant warp ring hidden in the level in Sonic 3 & Knuckles. Sonic Heroes decided they wanna be a bit quirky in a horrible way. In order to access the special stages in this game you have to collect a key hidden in the stage and bring that key with you until the end of the level or mission in order to unlock the special stages and collect the Emeralds…there’s so much wrong with this…Not only is it already easy for the game to send your ass to the shadow realm for existing but if you get hit and lose your key it doesn’t just fall out like rings do, it disappears completely meaning you’ll have to reload at a checkpoint or worse, restart the entire level every single time you get hit. And after you get through that bullshit we get to the special stage itself…if you’ve played this game you already know what’s up. The special stage acts similarly to the half pipe in Sonic 2 but except it’s a full enclosed pipe you run around in. The goal is to collect orbs to fill your boost meter and speed ahead to catch the emerald. It sounds very simple but remember, this game was coded by monkeys with hammers so the physics don’t function. Your character will constantly jitter around while moving making positioning yourself impossible when trying to collect the orbs. You have to pick between a Power or Speed character because Flight characters are too slow to do anything but even then you’re picking your poison. Do you wanna control your character better at the cost of speed or do you wanna go fast in order to get the emerald quickly at the cost of controlling your character? ‘Cause that’s exactly what it feels like. And I'm still not done because each Emerald is locked into every other stage. Sonic 1, 2, and 3 & Knuckles allows you to get the Emeralds as easy as the first 2 or 3 zones if you know what you’re doing. If you miss an emerald in one of the few stages they appear in you’ll have to repeat the level and do everything I just explained ALL OVER AGAIN. WHAT KIND OF COLLECTOR HATING SADISTIC BASTARD THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA WHEN THE EMERALDS ARE REQUIRED TO BEAT ALL OF THE STORY!? Before going in I knew how bad the special stages were while being blissfully unaware how bad the unlock requirements were so I used save states(yes I used an emulator) to collect the emeralds in a timely fashion. Not only did this end up taking longer than expected even with save states but I was forced to keep using them for every time I got hit, sent off the stage, or missed the Emerald causing my save file to corrupt and erase all my data. Which caused the auto save to fail and use exclusively save states to progress. And let me tell you, nothing’s scarier than booting up the game and discovering all of your save data has been completely erased even after you completed 2 campaigns previously.
Before I get into the last couple topics of discussion I'll touch on some minor things that don’t warrant their own paragraph individually. The voice acting is hit or miss with stand outs like Omega and Sonic and then there’s instances of some of the worst voice acting in the series with Tails where they deadass brought an 8 year old to voice the character. “Look at all those Eggman’s robots!”. But it gets weirder since Cream was voiced by an actual voice actress and Charmy was voiced by a teenager. Doesn’t help that the game has the characters not stop talking for every single damn action in the game. It’s the same cheesy lines for the entire playthrough. The game looks ugly with the admittedly improved models having textures that look like they’re plastic toys ready to be sold in some Walmart or Target. The pre rendered cutscenes might be revolutionary at the time but are horribly dated by today’s standards and the in game cutscenes that start at the beginning of boss fights and levels look extremely jittery and stiff with characters’ arms flailing to move into position, Omega’s eyes constantly bugging out, and the camera repeatedly having a stroke. Some assets feel like they are copy/pasted and slapped onto characters that don’t make sense. Omega and Big share the same aura color along with Espio and Sonic sharing the same aura color, purple and blue respectively. Omega’s triple glide animation looks exactly like Knuckles’ even though he could’ve been animated to use his thrusters. Rouge has a weird outfit change that is never used again. Some might think that it could be for censorship reasons but her chest is still exposed through a cleavage slit in the outfit which makes me wonder why they even bothered to change it. Plus her pink eyeshadow is less aesthetically pleasing than her iconic bright blue. It’s unclear if all the teams are doing everything at the same exact time or not making things really confusing.The way the characters are written are all over the place with a mixed bag across the board. Team Dark’s great as characters but then you have Tails who’s portrayed to act like some scaredy baby and Amy who’s been turned into a hyper thirsty yandere that’s willing to beat Sonic into marrying her. But all of that is nothing compared to how dirty they did Shadow.
Every team has their own mini story that drives their plot forwards; Team Sonic has to find and defeat Eggman, Team Rose is looking for their lost friends, Team Chaotix is tryna get the bread, and Omega, specifically Omega, is out to look for Eggman for revenge for locking him in a vault. Shadow though…ok first off, why is he here? He literally sacrificed himself to save the planet Earth from the space colony Ark with characters honoring said sacrifice and mourning his death, Sonic included…But then they decided to bring him back along with amnesia and a clone side story that makes him question who he is. The clone story is the dumbest shit in this entire damn game. As if it wasn’t enough to make him forget all the events of Sonic Adventure 2, which can kinda make sense if he was sent into a coma after crashing on Earth. But now he has to go through some midlife crisis level shit to try and figure out his past and if he’s even real, which spoiler alert: this game doesn’t resolve either plot point. These points were further developed and resolved by the next game; Shadow the Hedgehog which wasn’t the best game by all means but it gave more of a fuck to have a concrete story than Heroes ever did. And what’s worse is if the clones were gonna be brought up again in Shadow the Hedgehog and then be resolved in that same game then what the fuck was the point of doing any of this shit in Heroes!? All that did was leave Shadow’s story on a cliffhanger that accomplished nothing but made fans confused and left them with unanswered questions for 2 years until Shadow the Hedgehog came out.
But finally, after collecting all 7 Chaos Emeralds and beating all 4 Team campaigns you’re rewarded with the Last Story which reveals that Metal Sonic was the real mastermind behind everything that happened in the game so he can copy everyone’s data and assume a powerful new form…that takes way too long to transform into…with Metal Overlord…just to beat Sonic. Not even world domination, just to beat Sonic. While his dedication is admirable it’s a really shallow goal. Plus the buildup towards him being the main big bad isn’t handled as well as it could’ve been. All we get are a background element that people would miss if they’re too focused on just beating the level, an extra animation at the end of a boss cutscene that only appears for Team Sonic and Shadow’s story, and a few lines of dialogue from Team Chaotix’s “client” that makes it clear that it’s Eggman. But it would’ve been better to actually know how all of this happened in the first place. Metal Sonic shows up as Neo Metal Sonic as the first time we see him in this game with no explanation as to how he got this form or how he found out he can copy others’ abilities. Not even a cutscene or backstory from Eggman in the final story, instead he just complains about how they can’t defeat him without the Chaos Emeralds. Without prior knowledge I wouldn’t blame anyone for thinking that Metal Sonic just got a redesign since he hadn't made an appearance in the Adventure era at that time. How cool would it have been to have been given cutscenes showing us Metal Sonic twisting and contorting his body to not only show how he managed to do this in the first place but how far he’s willing to go to beat Sonic without spoiling the final form to leave the audience in suspense before the final act? And him not revealing that he copied Team Rose and Team Chaotix data kinda comes off as him not recognizing their strengths and calling them too weak to copy from, even if he didn’t say so himself. The segment where the teams do their best to weaken Metal Madness for Team Sonic is fine enough except the coding monkeys did it again and made it so that Flying characters can’t do any damage. But then there’s the final battle with Super Team Sonic…Team Super Sonic…uh…a Chaos Emerald powered Team Sonic. Admittedly the fight is really cool with Metal Overlord chucking entire battleships at the player and talking about how he believes he’s the real Sonic as What I’m Made Of blasts in the background. But there’s 2 major things that bring this fight down for me. Sonic Adventure 2 did a similar sequence of the cast of characters help Sonic and Shadow go super and defeat the big bad. Only difference being the buildup was more elaborate and the stakes were higher as if they failed the entire planet was at stake along with the presentation of the final fight being better in every way. One fight takes place in outer space while the other takes place in the sky a vague height above the ground. And most insulting of all they robbed us of bringing back Super Knuckles and Super Tails. This might’ve been because of the retcon of super forms only being possible with male hedgehogs but that was a massive missed opportunity. And after the fight is done Sonic drops one of the corniest one liners in the franchise, the 5th set of unskippable credits scrolls on screen, and the game tells you to do everything again but get to A ranks this time as one final fuck you.
In conclusion the game had a lot of…interesting ideas to say the least in terms of mixing up the Sonic formula. Unfortunately they used too much gas when trying to cook and sent the entire dish ablaze. I think if they let this game simmer a bit more and took at least a year to iron out all the bugs and mishaps since this game was developed in 20 months. As a comparison Sonic Adventure 2 took 18 months to develop and was still better. And while I've made comparisons to past Sonic games I wanna make it clear that I am aware of the flaws those other games have. After all, nothing is perfect. But Sonic Team at least could’ve made sure that their game was worth it in spite of these flaws by tweaking some game mechanics to make them more fun. And feel free to say why you’d think this game is peak Sonic. Alright that’s all, thanks for reading this far and have a fantastic day.

PC
Reddit Account: WingedRabbits
Discord Tag: professorpisstake
Name and House: Valarr Scales
Age: 62
Cultural Group: Valyrian (Westerosi)
Appearance: Valarr is a withered, frail, old man with a permanent scowl on his face - despite this or perhaps because of this, he is quite an imposing character. His hair is white and wispy, and falls just down to his shoulders where it meets his well-maintained beard. A jagged scar runs along the right-side of his face, starting at his lip and twisting up to his ear. Valarr walks with a limp, and is seemingly always clutching his silver cane.
Trait: Numerate
Skill(s): Architect, Avaricious (e), scrutinous, administrator
Talent(s): Haggling, Bargaining, Familial Matters
Negative Trait(s): N/A
Starting Title(s): Lord of the Scales, Lord of house Scales.
Starting Location: Opening
Alternate Characters: Aurion Scales
AC
Name and House: Ser Aurion Scales
Age: 30
Cultural Group: Valyrian (Westerosi)
Appearance: In contrast to his father, Aurion is a strapping, elegant man. He has wonderful, straight, brown hair which droops down to his shoulders, and a fine beard. He wears bright, fanciful clothing - which makes him stand out like a sore thumb against his father and his father's retinue, who tend to wear dull, dark clothes. Aurion has a well-mannered stride.
Trait: Just
Skill(s): Vanguard, Two-Handed Weapons, Armored
Talent(s): Public Speaking, Fashion, Charm
Negative Trait(s): N/A
Starting Title(s): Heir to The Scales,
Starting Location: Opening Event
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bio-Timeline

37 BC - Valarr is born as the first child of Lord Aurane Scales. He is born a sickly child. Maester Corwyn begins taking care of Valarr.
36 BC - Valarr is declared healthy by Maester Corwyn. He is expected to grow into a healthy young child. A daughter is born to Lord Aurane Scales. She is named Helicent, after her grandmother. She is said to have cried for hours after her birth.
32 BC - Another son is born to Lord Aurane. He is named Edric. Young Valarr begins his tutelage under his father. Luthor Scales is born to Valarr’s uncle, Lucerys ‘The Wise’. Luthor weighed ten pounds at birth.
31 BC - Pirates assault The Scales in a surprise raid. Although they are repelled, the damage they dealt will be felt for years to come. Valarr is given a cat for his nameday - he affectionately names it “Balerion”, after the dragon which he often saw soaring above.
29 BC - Helicent becomes subject to relentless bullying by some older kids in court. Valarr witnesses this, and starts teaching Helicent how to fight back using techniques he had learned from his father and his other tutors. The siblings become friends. Johanna Scales is born to Lucerys ‘The Wise’.
27 BC - Following his tenth nameday, Valarr is sent to study in Dragonstone for a year. He grows to miss his siblings greatly, though. Valaena Targaryen allows Valarr to hold and play with the newborn Aegon on occasion, which helps him deal with his homesickness when his parents did not visit. Edric begins his tutelage under Lord Aurane.
26 BC - Valarr returns home from his year-long stay in Dragonstone. Valarr and Edric struggle to get along - but find common ground in their hatred of their oafish cousin Luthor.
24 BC - Aurane begins teaching Valarr how to command and lead armies, and how to manage a domain. Valarr shows unusual aptitude with the logistics and management of a fiefdom.
22 BC - Edric begins shirking his studies to spend time at the local port. Valarr and Luthor’s rivalry intensifies.
21 BC - Valarr celebrates his 16th nameday, and the beginning of his adult life. His studies under his father conclude. Valarr struggles with his feelings for his sister. They share their first kiss. Aurane announces that Helicent is to be betrothed to Maekar Belaerys. Valarr is upset.
20 BC - Helicent celebrates her 16th nameday, and is wed to Maekar Belaerys. Valarr leaves The Scales for Dragonstone, to serve in the court of the Targaryens.
16 BC - Edric and Luthor both celebrate their 16th nameday. Edric takes the first chance he gets to sign on as a sailor with a merchant ship, right under his father’s nose. Lord Aurane is infuriated. Luthor undergoes a growth-spurt, and by the end of it - he is as tall and broad as men twice his age.
14 BC - Luthor begins frequenting brothels on Dragonstone and brings home his first bastard. The child is named Aerion. Valarr does not enjoy having to explain to Lord Targaryen that Luthor’s choice of name was meant as a compliment, rather than an insult.
13 BC - Lucerys ‘The Wise’ falls ill with consumption. He is dead within the year. There is a suspicious increase in the number of silver-haired babies born on Dragonstone this year.
10 BC - Luthor brings home a second bastard child, and names this one Aegon. Valarr returns to The Scales after spending the last few years serving in the court of the Targaryens. Luthor and Valarr begin to bicker constantly. Lord Aurane falls ill. Valarr begins courting Calla Blackberry.
8 BC - Edric returns home after receiving word of his father’s condition - with him, he brings a Tyroshi woman named Rohanne and a young child. He explains that he and Rohanne fell in love during his time in Essos, and wed. The child is their son, Elyas. Valarr is just glad to see his brother again.
7 BC - Lord Aurane dies clutching at his heart during a feast. Valarr becomes the new Lord of House Scales, and is eager to make his father proud. New construction efforts within the Scales begin immediately.
6 BC - Lord Valarr marries Calla Blackberry. He commissions a suit of plate-armour - decorated with ornamental scales across the breastplate and base. Calla becomes pregnant.
5 BC - Aurion Scales is born to Valarr and Calla.
2 BC - Triston Scales is born to Valarr and Calla.
2 BC - Aegon Targaryen declares his intention to unite the Seven Kingdoms. Valarr Scales is among one of his first and most ardent supporters. When Aegon rallied his banners, Valarr was the first to arrive. When Aegon landed in the Blackwater Bay, Valarr was one of the first to feel the sand under his boots. Alongside Valarr was his brother Edric and cousin Luthor. The trio were unstoppable on the battlefield. Valarr and his men participate in the Battle of the Reeds and Wailing Willows.
1 BC - The Last Storm. Valarr, his brother, and his cousin all fought on the front line. Valarr commanded his men from atop his horse. They withstood the Storm King’s initial assaults, but upon his fourth charge the line broke. Argilac’s spearmen surrounded his position and picked off his retinue - eventually, they even got Valarr. They butchered his horse and pierced his hip. Valarr fell from his saddle, and then his horse fell on him - or at least, on his right leg. He eventually managed to free himself, only to be met with a hammer directly to his face. He was lucky the padding beneath his helmet took most of the impact. He was found the following morning by healers, and carried back to camp for treatment. Many of his bones had been broken, and much of the skin on the right side of his face was only hanging on by threads. Despite this, he made a miraculous recovery after a short battle with infection. However, his leg never healed right - and it seemed unlikely he would ever be able to fight again because of it.
1 BC - The Field of Fire. After Orys Baratheon’s successful campaign in the Stormlands, Valarr and his forces were reassigned to fight once more under Aegon’s banner - this time in his conquest of the Reach. Valarr did not participate directly in the Field of Fire, rather he was put in charge of managing the logistics for Aegon’s army. He was to make sure Aegon’s men were fed and supplied for the duration of his campaign in the Reach, and Valarr excelled at this job. When the day came that Aegon’s forces met the combined forces of the Kingdoms of the Rock and the Reach, Valarr took position as one of Aegon’s commanders. Although he was not in any chief leadership position for the battle, he played a role in devising the crescent formation that would keep Aegon’s men from being surrounded. Edric and Luthor again fought on the frontlines.
1 AC - Valarr is present for Aegon’s coronation. Valarr returns home to the Scales with Edric and Luthor in tow.
2 AC - Valarr commissions a Qohorik blacksmith to forge a cane to assist with walking. The cane is to be made half of lightweight silver and half of polished black wood, and the silver is to be engraved in the style of scales, with the handle of the cane to be fashioned in the style of a dragon’s head. The commission nearly halves Valarr’s treasury. Edric is given the task of staying in Qohor until the cane is completed, and then returning it to Valarr.
3 AC - Valarr’s cane is finished. Edric returns with it in haste. Luthor sires another bastard - Brea ‘Waters’.
5 AC - Rohanne Quaynis gives birth to a daughter. Edric names her Rohanne, after her mother. Luthor and his sister Johanna begin an affair. Valarr begins renovations of his holdfast - with the goal of elevating his home into a proper Keep. Aerion ‘Waters’ becomes known as a formidable warrior.
7 AC - Several pregnancies coincide this year, causing the House to grow quite a bit. Valarr and Calla introduce their daughter Cyrenna Scales to the world. Edric and his wife have a son, who they name ‘Aurane’, after Edric’s father. Luthor and Johanna have a bastard of incest together. They might have been able to keep their affair a secret, but Johanna dies during childbirth and Luthor takes open responsibility for the child. She is named Rhaenys. Luthor begins to spiral into his vices, namely drink and food. Aegon ‘Waters’ leaves The Scales to search for work as a mercenary.
7 AC - Valarr attends Aegon’s feast in King’s Landing. He reconnects with his King, and they share many stories of their childhood and their younger years, and then stories of their time during the Conquest. Valarr leaves to handle some issues with his family. By the time he returns, Aegon has already been wounded. After a few tense days of waiting, Aegon’s death is made public. Valarr mourns the loss of his King, and his friend.
8 AC - Luthor finally marries after spending years as a bachelor. He has a daughter with his new wife. He names his first trueborn child ‘Saera’.
10 AC - Aurion Scales - son of Valarr - reaches his tenth nameday. He is sent to live in the court of Dragonstone for a year. Triston grows resentful of his brother. Luthor has a son, who he names Morgan.
11 AC - Aurion returns from Dragonstone. Luthor has another daughter, who he names Falyse. Elyas Scales - son of Edric - marries.
12 AC - Triston has a bastard son with a servant girl. He names him Oswyn. Elyas has twins, who he names Lucerys and Casella.
14 AC - Edric arranges a betrothal for his daughter Rohanne, but she refuses to marry. Rohanne hides on a merchant ship as a stowaway. Rohanne winds up in Pentos and begins living as a beggar.
15 AC - Many Scales attend Orys’ Kingswood hunt, including Edric, Aurion, and Elyas. Elyas is struck down during the Kingswood Catastrophe by brigands while protecting his mother - who is also slain. Edric is distraught over the death of both his son and his beloved wife. Aurion displays great bravery during the event, and manages to free a group of hostages on his own while slaying a small band of brigands. For his bravery and courage, Aurion is knighted.
16 AC - Edric boards a ship bound for King’s Landing. During the voyage, he is reported to have flung himself overboard in an apparent act of suicide. His body could not be found. Valarr is very upset to have lost his brother. Valarr makes up with his cousin Luthor.
18 AC - Aurion leaves Dragonstone for the mainland, and begins traveling across Westeros as a hedge-knight - focusing on fighting in tourneys, and helping anyone who needs it. Rohanne joins up with the Company of the Rose after years of begging and stealing to survive.
20 AC - Triston Scales begins aiding his father with his duties, as Valarr becomes increasingly frail. Brea ‘Waters’ leaves The Scales on a ship to Storm’s End. She bounces between port towns until she winds up Tyrosh, where she joins up with a band of pirates.
21 AC - Aerion ‘Waters’ becomes the Master-At-Arms of The Scales, replacing ‘old’ Ser Clayton.
22 AC - Oswyn ‘Waters’ becomes entranced with books and legends and history. He is never seen without a book in his hand.
23 AC - Brea ‘Waters’ manages to become the captain of her own vessel, ‘The Black Wyrm’. Her crew is a nuisance to many traders along the coasts of the Free Cities.
24 AC - Valarr is discontent with the state of House Scales, and with how little recognition they have received despite their contributions to their liege. He drafts plans to forge alliances with as many houses as he can, and to build up the prestige and power of his house.
25 AC - Present. Valarr, Aurion, Luthor and a few other members of House Scales attend the festivities in The Kingswood.
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
House Scales in 25 AC

So, I have recently had an idea for an EDH Deck; Aeve, Progenitor Ooze + Slime Against Humanity. In a couple of ways, I'm not ENTIRELY sure they even go together super well, with Aeve having a CMC of 5 and SAH being 3, while it only makes one slime, but I still like the idea!
Where I'm having a little "issue" is a place that Green should NEVER suffer; mana. How do you actually make Storm work? The easy explanation is I rarely ever play fast, or even really active decks; like Blue as much as I do, I don't typically build spellslinger decks, so one or two casts/turn is my norm. To make Storm work, though, I feel like one really wants something, like three casts prior to the Storm card, but then Aeve is a CMC 5, and if it goes away, so I can recast it, and get that trigger again, 7; he quickly grows in price even without feeding the Storm, and I feel like it's the whole point. Again, I know Green isn't supposed to have this trouble; it literally ramps, and then makes big, stompy, dumb creatures, as one half of the trust fund colors (Simic), but I just struggle to imagine, especially in mono-Green, paying something like 6 mana, for the casts, and then another 5+ for the Commander, just to get enough token copies to make it worth it, that late in the game. How do you actually make Storm work well, in EDH, especially in mono-Green? Any good, cheap spells that will fit into the theme deck well, other than the obvious "pay 2, grab more Lands, RAMP!" effects that is already Green's thing?
I haven't decided if I want it to be strictly Slime/Ooze, or if I might include an Elves component, just for the cheap bodies, and fun ramp, but I wouldn't mind a bit of mono-Green Storm advice?

I have had some success with this Ravenwing list vs some mean Necrons lists and I am wondering what you guy's thoughts were. I am trying really hard to stay with the pure Ravenwing theme well remaining somewhat competitive.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

• FACTION KEYWORD: Imperium - Adeptus Astartes - Dark Angels
  
• DETACHMENT: Company of Hunters
  
• TOTAL ARMY POINTS: 2000pts
  

+

• WARLORD: Char1: Chaplain on Bike
  
• ENHANCEMENT: Mounted Strategist (on Char1: Chaplain on Bike)
  

& Mounted Strategist (on Char1: Chaplain on Bike)
& Master of Manoeuvre (on Char2: Ravenwing Command Squad - Ravenwing Champion)

• NUMBER OF UNITS: 16
  
• SECONDARY: - Bring It Down: 2x3 - Assassination: 3 Characters
  

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Char1: 1x Chaplain on Bike (105 pts): Warlord, Absolver Bolt Pistol, Crozius Arcanum, Twin Bolt Rifle
Enhancement: Mounted Strategist (+30 pts)
Char2: 3x Ravenwing Command Squad (145 pts)
• 1x Ravenwing Ancient: Black Knight combat weapon, Bolt Pistol, Plasma talon
• 1x Ravenwing Apothecary: Black Knight combat weapon, Bolt Pistol, Plasma talon
• 1x Ravenwing Champion: Bolt Pistol, Master-crafted power weapon, Plasma talon
Enhancement: Master of Manoeuvre (+15 pts)
Char3: 3x Ravenwing Command Squad (130 pts)
• 1x Ravenwing Ancient: Black Knight combat weapon, Bolt Pistol, Plasma talon
• 1x Ravenwing Apothecary: Black Knight combat weapon, Bolt Pistol, Plasma talon
• 1x Ravenwing Champion: Bolt Pistol, Master-crafted power weapon, Plasma talon
4x Outrider Squad (150 pts)
• 1x Invader ATV: Close Combat Weapon, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle, Onslaught Gatling Cannon
• 2x Outrider: 2 with Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
• 1x Outrider Sergeant: Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
4x Outrider Squad (150 pts)
• 1x Invader ATV: Close Combat Weapon, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle, Onslaught Gatling Cannon
• 2x Outrider: 2 with Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
• 1x Outrider Sergeant: Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
3x Outrider Squad (80 pts)
• 2x Outrider: 2 with Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
• 1x Outrider Sergeant: Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
3x Outrider Squad (80 pts)
• 2x Outrider: 2 with Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
• 1x Outrider Sergeant: Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
3x Outrider Squad (80 pts)
• 2x Outrider: 2 with Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
• 1x Outrider Sergeant: Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
3x Outrider Squad (80 pts)
• 2x Outrider: 2 with Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
• 1x Outrider Sergeant: Astartes Chainsword, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle
1x Invader ATV (70 pts): Close Combat Weapon, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle, Multi-melta
1x Invader ATV (70 pts): Close Combat Weapon, Heavy Bolt Pistol, Twin Bolt Rifle, Multi-melta
6x Ravenwing Black Knights (180 pts)
• 5x Ravenwing Black Knight: 5 with Black Knight combat weapon, Bolt Pistol, Plasma talon
• 1x Ravenwing Huntmaster: Black Knight combat weapon, Bolt Pistol, Plasma talon
6x Ravenwing Black Knights (180 pts)
• 5x Ravenwing Black Knight: 5 with Black Knight combat weapon, Bolt Pistol, Plasma talon
• 1x Ravenwing Huntmaster: Black Knight combat weapon, Bolt Pistol, Plasma talon
6x Ravenwing Black Knights (180 pts)
• 5x Ravenwing Black Knight: 5 with Black Knight combat weapon, Bolt Pistol, Plasma talon
• 1x Ravenwing Huntmaster: Black Knight combat weapon, Bolt Pistol, Plasma talon
1x Storm Speeder Thunderstrike (160 pts): Close Combat Weapon, Stormfury Missiles, Thunderstrike Las-talon, Twin Icarus Rocket Pod
1x Storm Speeder Thunderstrike (160 pts): Close Combat Weapon, Stormfury Missiles, Thunderstrike Las-talon, Twin Icarus Rocket Pod

Seventy years ago, on May 17, 1954, the Supreme Court decided Brown v. Board of Education of Topeka, Kansas. That landmark decision declared racial segregation in public schools unconstitutional.
Brown v. Board was a turning point in American history.
It established that the U.S. government would, once and for all, use the Fourteenth Amendment to protect American citizens from discriminatory legislation written by state legislatures.
Added to the Constitution in 1868, in the wake of the Civil War, as southern state legislatures were writing laws that made Black Americans subservient to white Americans, the Fourteenth Amendment asserted that the federal government could, and must, stop such discrimination. It established that “No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.” It gave Congress the power to enforce the amendment.
In the late nineteenth century, the Supreme Court nodded to racial segregation in the 1896 Plessy v. Ferguson decision, getting around the Fourteenth Amendment by asserting that separate accommodations were fine, so long as they were “equal.” But in 1954 a unanimous court under Chief Justice Earl Warren, who had previously been the Republican governor of California, ruled that racial segregation established by state law in public schools denied to Black children the equal protection of the laws guaranteed by the Fourteenth Amendment.
“Separate educational facilities are inherently unequal,” it wrote.
Just two weeks before it decided Brown v. Board, the Supreme Court had decided Hernandez v. Texas, which established that not only Black Americans, but also Mexican Americans and all other nationality groups, were entitled to equal protection under the Fourteenth Amendment.
Over the following decades, the Supreme Court used the Fourteenth Amendment to strike down state laws against interracial marriage and gay marriage, and to establish equal rights for women, including the right to abortion. It also ruled the Civil Rights Act of 1964, which prohibited discrimination on the basis of race, color, religion, sex, or national origin, constitutional.
That new legal framework, embodied in Brown v. Board, both established the equal rights that were central to the modern era and sparked a backlash against them.
The federal requirement that states desegregate their public schools spurred southern state legislatures to pass laws and resolutions to block or postpone desegregation. In 1956, ninety-nine congressmen, led by South Carolina Democrat Strom Thurmond, wrote the “Declaration of Constitutional Principles,” quickly dubbed the Southern Manifesto, denouncing desegregation as unconstitutional.
Lawmakers also found ways to transfer tax dollars to private schools, which were not covered by the Supreme Court’s decision. Attendance at so-called segregation academies exploded. By 1958, more than 250,000 students had migrated to segregation academies, a number that jumped to a million by 1965.
Those opposed to racial equality made common cause with those businessmen determined to get rid of federal regulation of business. In 1955, William F. Buckley Jr., the son of an oilman, started National Review, a periodical that promised to stand against an active government that protected labor and regulated business. Buckley said he would tell the “violated businessman’s side of the story.”
In National Review, Buckley gave Virginia newspaper editor James Kilpatrick a platform to assure readers that desegregation challenged American values. Black Americans had no right to the equality declared unanimously by the Supreme Court, Kilpatrick wrote. Rather, the white community had an established right “to peace and tranquillity [sic]; the right to freedom from tumult and lawlessness.” Desegregation would lead to bloody violence, he promised, implying that Black Americans would rage and riot, although, in fact, it was the white community that was attacking Black Americans.
In 1964, Arizona senator Barry Goldwater brought these two themes to his presidential campaign. He stood firm on the idea that the federal government had no business either regulating business or protecting equality. In The Conscience of a Conservative, published under his name in 1960, Goldwater asserted that the federal government had no power over schools at all and certainly could not order them to desegregate.
Goldwater accepted the Republican presidential nomination in July 1964, less than a month after three civil rights workers registering Black Americans to vote had disappeared in Mississippi. Goldwater told his cheering supporters: “Extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice, and…moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue.” Strom Thurmond publicly announced that he would vote for Goldwater.
Goldwater lost in a landslide, but his loss fed the backlash against federal protection of equality, especially after Congress passed the 1965 Voting Rights Act to expand Black and Brown voting, moving many of those voters into the Democrats’ camp. In 1968, Republican Richard Nixon courted Thurmond and white southerners with a promise to slow down desegregation and a defense of state’s rights. The so-called Southern Strategy moved the former Dixiecrats to the Republican Party.
Religious traditionalists, particularly those among the Southern Baptist Convention, also opposed the federal government’s support for equality, although they got less press in the early years of that expansion. In their view, the Bible laid out hierarchical social arrangements, especially patriarchy. Government defense of women’s equality was a direct assault on their worldview.
When he ran for the presidency in 1980, former California governor Ronald Reagan courted those religious traditionalists, and in 1985 his people made them a key part of the Republican coalition. Americans for Tax Reform brought together big business, evangelicals, and social conservatives under the leadership of Grover Norquist, who had been an economist for the U.S. Chamber of Commerce. “Traditional Republican business groups can provide the resources,” Norquist explained, “but these groups can provide the votes.”
In the following decades, Republican leaders used racist and traditionalist dislike of equal rights to turn out voters who would let them put their economic policies—cuts to taxes and deregulation of business—into place. But those opposed to equal rights found themselves out of step with a majority of voters and unable to get their policies enshrined into law as courts continued to uphold equal rights for racial and ethnic minorities, LGBTQ+ individuals, and women.
The backlash against the federal protection of equal rights based on the Fourteenth Amendment entered a new era with the election of Donald Trump. In contrast to his predecessors, Trump let the racist and sexist voter base of the party drive policy. White evangelicals, especially, found in Trump an answer to their frustration at being sidelined by the courts and a majority of American voters.
Despite his own lack of personal virtue, Trump was willing to smash through the laws and court decisions that had supported equality since the 1950s, offering to center the country on traditional religion and racial hierarchies in exchange for power. Under him, traditionalists saw the courts stacked with extremists who would prioritize their evangelical faith across society, including by ending the federal protection of abortion rights.
Their fight to return Trump to power is part of their fight to establish traditional religion, rather than the equality promised in the Fourteenth Amendment, as the nation’s fundamental law. As Trump’s chief of staff Mark Meadows wrote to Ginni Thomas, the wife of Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, as they plotted to overturn the decision of voters in 2020 to reject Trump: “This is a fight of good versus evil. Evil always looks like the victor until the King of Kings triumphs. Do not grow weary in well doing. The fight continues. I have staked my career on it.”
Today, almost exactly seventy years to the day after Brown v. Board ushered in a new era of equality and democracy in the United States, MAGA Republican lawmakers Andy Biggs (R-AZ), Lauren Boebert (R-CO), Michael Cloud (R-TX), Eli Crane (R-AZ), Matt Gaetz (R-FL), Bob Good (R-VA), Diana Harshbarger (R-TN), Anna Paulina Luna (R-FL), Ralph Norman (R-SC), and Andy Ogles (R-TN) traveled to Manhattan to stand with Trump at his criminal trial for falsifying business records to interfere in an election. The lawmakers made it clear that their determination to control the country has made them give up not only on the equality promised in the Declaration of Independence and defended by the Fourteenth Amendment, but also on democracy.
Echoing the promise of the right-wing Proud Boys to Trump before they stormed the U.S. Capitol to install Trump into office despite the will of the voters, Gaetz tweeted: “Standing back and standing by, Mr. President.”
—
Notes:
https://www.law.cornell.edu/supremecourt/text/163/537
https://tile.loc.gov/storage-services/service/ll/usrep/usrep347/usrep347483/usrep347483.pdf
https://www.law.cornell.edu/supremecourt/text/347/475
https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=mdp.39015046344738&seq=38
James Jackson Kilpatrick, “Right and Power in Arkansas,” National Review, September 28,
1957, pp. 273–275.
https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/video/archival-video-barry-goldwater-speaks-1964-republican-national-40578479
Jane Mayer, “Ways and Means Panel’s Tax-Overhaul Proposal Brings ‘Family’ Strife to Conservative Coalition,” Wall Street Journal, November 27, 1985, p. 52.
https://www.kcra.com/article/texts-between-ginni-thomas-and-mark-meadows/39531243
https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/matt-gaetz-lauren-boebert-appear-trump-trial/story?id=110319095
Twitter (X):
acnewsitics/status/1791223441179238892
https://heathercoxrichardson.substack.com/p/may-16-2024

For the sheer fun of it, I went to Chat GPT with a creative writing assignment. For Figures of Speech prompts, I gave a free parameters, including the word length of 500-1000 words and the prompts for a few of the Fifty mentioned in the series.
I gave the AI creative license and let's just say, they're a long way off from replacing the better writers and I think it just makes it easier to do those lower level tasks and let's leave the creators a slightly higher level of skill to create actual tangible and engaging writing.
But here you go... hilarious how stuck it gets on certain terms and definitions.
These are in no particular order... separated by emojis that are totally unrelated to the storyline.
🫱🫱🫱🫱🫱🫱🫱🫱🫲🫲🫲🫲🫲🫲🫲🫲 Response to Prompt 4: Understatement
In the quaint town of Brooksville, where the extraordinary was often met with an indifferent shrug, something truly remarkable occurred. The residents, sipping coffee at the local diner or strolling along the cobblestone streets, would describe it as just another peculiar day. Little did they know that beneath the surface of their nonchalant existence, a cosmic event unfolded.
The morning sun cast its usual warm glow on Brooksville, with birds chirping in the background, creating an illusion of normalcy. However, the anomaly had already begun. Mrs. Higgins, the elderly librarian, dismissed it as a minor inconvenience, merely a glitch in the library's ancient computer system. Yet, every book cataloged within those ancient shelves had transformed into a portal, connecting readers to parallel universes with every turn of a page.
As I, a humble journalist for the local paper, stumbled upon this revelation, I couldn't help but marvel at the town's response—or lack thereof. "The library's having a bit of a moment," was the most anyone would acknowledge. It seemed the whole town collectively decided that this was, at most, a quirky hiccup.
For a thousand words, I delved into the understated reactions of the townsfolk, each encounter with a parallel universe bringing its own blend of confusion and nonchalance. As the portals expanded, revealing fantastical landscapes and alternate versions of Brooksville, the citizens maintained an impressive level of calm, as if interdimensional travel was a routine part of their daily lives.
The plot thickened when I discovered that the portals were a result of a mysterious artifact hidden within the library's archives. The mayor, sipping his coffee, remarked, "Well, that explains the strange noises in the basement." It became evident that the understatement of the situation was a defense mechanism, shielding the town from the cosmic chaos unfolding. 🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 Response to Prompt 12: Juxtaposition
In the bustling metropolis of Neon City, skyscrapers touched the heavens, their dazzling lights reflecting off the sleek surfaces of futuristic cars. Yet, nestled within this urban jungle, an ancient relic stood defiantly—the Old Grove Park.
As I strolled through the city's concrete arteries, the juxtaposition between the modernity of Neon City and the timeless serenity of the park became increasingly apparent. The cacophony of traffic was replaced by the rustling of leaves and the distant laughter of children playing.
The central conflict emerged when the city council, embodying the epitome of order, proposed transforming the park into a technologically advanced hub. The juxtaposition intensified as architects discussed plans for holographic playgrounds and virtual reality gardens within the confines of the Old Grove Park.
Through a thousand words, I explored the clash of ideals, the struggle between progress and preservation. The ancient trees became silent witnesses to heated debates at town hall meetings, where environmentalists and tech enthusiasts engaged in a battle of words. The juxtaposition of the towering skyscrapers against the gnarled branches of the park's oldest tree mirrored the tension in Neon City's collective conscience. 😫😫😫😫😫😫😫😫😫😫😫😫😫😫 Response to Prompt 31: Epanalepsis
"What is the meaning of life?" The question echoed in my mind, a relentless epanalepsis that demanded exploration. As I embarked on this freewriting journey, the repetition of the existential inquiry became the rhythm of my introspection.
For a thousand words, I delved into the varied perspectives of individuals wrestling with the ultimate question. From philosophers contemplating the intricacies of existence to everyday people seeking purpose in mundane routines, the epanalepsis served as a constant reminder of the universal quest for meaning.
The narrative weaved through different characters and their unique experiences, creating a tapestry of reflections that echoed the complexities of human existence. The repetitive structure became a literary heartbeat, pulsating with the shared yearning for understanding amid the chaotic symphony of life. 🪔🪔🪔🪔🪔🪔🪔🪔🪔🪔🪔🪔🪔 Response to Prompt 27: Symbolism
In the quaint town of Willowbrook, the arrival of a single dove carried profound significance. Its graceful descent into the town square was a symbol, an omen that whispered of impending change. As a budding novelist with a penchant for symbolism, I couldn't resist exploring the layers of meaning embedded in this seemingly mundane event.
For a thousand words, I dissected the impact of the dove on the lives of Willowbrook's residents. The mayor saw it as a sign of prosperity, the local florist interpreted it as a call for unity, and the elderly storyteller regarded it as a harbinger of forgotten tales. The dove's symbolism rippled through the town, influencing decisions and shaping destinies.
As the story unfolded, I traced the journey of the dove's symbolism, following its subtle influence on characters and events. The once quaint town underwent a transformative metamorphosis, and the symbolism of the dove became a thread that wove through the narrative, connecting disparate lives in unexpected ways. 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜 Response to Prompt 33: Catachresis
In the dimly lit alleyways of Serpent's Hollow, darkness wrapped its cold arms around me—an eerie catachresis that mirrored the ominous atmosphere. The assignment was to explore the underbelly of the city, and as a novice reporter, I found myself navigating the labyrinth of deceit and shadows.
For a thousand words, I delved into the catachresis-infused descriptions of the characters populating Serpent's Hollow. The crime lord, known as the Velvet Serpent, ruled the district with a velvet-gloved fist. His lair, a dilapidated mansion, exuded an air of faded grandeur that served as a catachresis for the empire he once commanded.
As I chronicled the criminal underworld, the catachresis became a literary tool to convey the complexity and decay inherent in Serpent's Hollow. The labyrinthine plots, the twisted allegiances, and the morally ambiguous characters all found expression through catachresis, painting a vivid picture of a city where metaphor and reality intertwined. 🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧🧑‍🔧 Response to Prompt 43: Epizeuxis
"Never, never, never give up." The words echoed in my mind, a relentless epizeuxis that fueled the protagonist's journey against insurmountable odds. In the dystopian world I crafted, where hope was a rare commodity, the power of repetition became a beacon of resilience.
For a thousand words, I immersed myself in the protagonist's struggle, exploring the emotional depth of the epizeuxis as a mantra against despair. Each iteration of the phrase became a battle cry, a whispered promise that carried the weight of a shattered world on its shoulders.
As the narrative unfolded, the epizeuxis became a driving force, propelling the protagonist through a landscape of desolation and uncertainty. The repetition served as a reminder that, in the face of adversity, the strength to persist often lies in the relentless echo of one's own determination.
Response to Prompt 50: Acrostic
As the final rays of the setting sun painted the sky in hues of orange and pink, I found myself at the edge of the cliff overlooking the vast expanse of the ocean. The salty breeze carried whispers of a story, and with every breath, I embraced the challenge of crafting an acrostic that encapsulated the essence of my journey.
For a thousand words, I embarked on a reflective exploration, utilizing the initial letters of key words to weave a tapestry of emotions, experiences, and revelations. Each line unfolded with intention, revealing a hidden 👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾 Response to Prompt 3: Hyperbole
In the quaint village of Mistwood, where routines unfolded with the predictability of the sunrise, the arrival of a peculiar fortune teller sparked exaggerated whispers. "This is it, the end of our mundane lives!" proclaimed Mrs. Thompson, the town's eternal pessimist, as she clutched her cat, Captain Whiskers, with an air of impending catastrophe.
The hyperbole hung in the air, a thick fog of anticipation enveloping the village. As I delved into the story, the hyperbolic reactions of Mistwood's residents heightened the absurdity of the situation. What began as a mere visit from a mystical figure transformed into a fantastical escapade, with the fortune teller's prophecies shaping the destiny of the villagers in ludicrous ways.
Through the hyperbolic lens, I explored the comedic consequences of taking ordinary events to extraordinary extremes. The once mundane village square became a stage for outlandish dramas, with exaggerated gasps and dramatic swoons punctuating every revelation. In this hyperbolic haven, Mistwood's residents discovered the joy in embracing the absurdity of life. 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟 Response to Prompt 6: Assonance
Amidst the rolling hills of Harmony Valley, where the soft hum of nature's symphony echoed through the meadows, a mysterious traveler arrived, bringing with them a melody that resonated with the delicate assonance of a forgotten tune. The townsfolk, captivated by the harmonious vibrations, felt an inexplicable connection to the stranger.
As I explored the narrative, the assonance became a musical thread weaving through the story, emphasizing the emotional cadence of the characters' experiences. The traveler's words, laced with vowel-rich verses, carried the echoes of a distant melody, leaving an indelible impression on the hearts of those who listened.
Through the lens of assonance, I delved into the subtle interplay of sounds that defined the atmosphere of Harmony Valley. The lyrical quality of the narrative mirrored the town's collective journey, where the resonance of shared moments and emotions harmonized with the traveler's enigmatic presence.
Response to Prompt 7: Onomatopoeia
In the bustling city of Metropolis, where the rhythm of urban life played out in a cacophony of sounds, a peculiar street performer emerged. Armed with an array of unconventional instruments, he orchestrated a symphony of onomatopoeic brilliance that echoed through the crowded streets.
The narrative unfolded with the vibrant expressions of onomatopoeia, capturing the essence of the city's sonic landscape. The performer's drumming evoked the rhythmic tap-tap of raindrops, while his wind instruments mimicked the whoosh of passing cars. The city, typically drowned in noise, became a canvas for this auditory artist.
As I delved into the story, the onomatopoeic symphony became a language of its own. The characters communicated through the vibrant echoes of everyday sounds, fostering a unique connection between the performer and the people of Metropolis. The narrative danced to the beat of onomatopoeic creativity, transforming the mundane into a dynamic celebration of city life. 🦻🦻🦻🦻🦻🦻🦻🦻🦻🦻🦻🦻🦻🦻🦻 Response to Prompt 12: Juxtaposition
In the technologically advanced city of Silicon Haven, where sleek skyscrapers touched the sky and holographic billboards painted the air with luminescent advertisements, a hidden oasis existed—a pocket of nature known as the Zen Garden. The juxtaposition of these contrasting elements created a visual paradox that fascinated both residents and visitors alike.
As the narrative unfolded, the stark contrast between the city's cutting-edge architecture and the serene beauty of the Zen Garden became a metaphor for the characters' internal conflicts. The bustling metropolis symbolized progress and innovation, while the tranquil garden embodied the need for balance and introspection.
Through the lens of juxtaposition, I explored the dichotomy within the characters as they navigated the relentless pace of Silicon Haven. The Zen Garden became a refuge, a place where the cacophony of technology met the soothing whispers of nature. The juxtaposition served as a visual metaphor for the characters' quest to find equilibrium in a world defined by extremes. 🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩 Response to Prompt 22: Metonymy
In the political arena of Capital City, where decisions echoed through the corridors of power, a single phrase dominated conversations—the "Iron Throne Statement." This metonymic expression encapsulated not just a policy decision but the entire narrative of political maneuvering that unfolded within the city's hallowed halls.
The story unfolded with the metonymy acting as a symbolic gateway into the complexities of governance. The Iron Throne Statement, while seemingly straightforward, carried the weight of a thousand debates, negotiations, and betrayals. Its impact rippled through the lives of citizens, shaping their destinies in ways they could scarcely fathom.
Through the lens of metonymy, I delved into the layers of meaning hidden within this political shorthand. The characters grappled not only with the literal implications of the Iron Throne Statement but also with the overarching themes of power, ambition, and the sacrifices demanded by political gamesmanship. 😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈 Response to Prompt 24: Understatement
In the picturesque town of Serenity Springs, where the days flowed like a lazy river and the nights were adorned with a blanket of stars, an unexpected event transpired—a subtle disruption that the locals described as "just a minor hiccup." Little did they know that this understatement concealed the unraveling of a cosmic anomaly.
The narrative unfolded with the charm of understatement, as the townsfolk continued their routines, blissfully unaware of the cosmic storm brewing beneath the surface. The serene descriptions of everyday life served as a stark contrast to the impending upheaval that threatened to reshape the very fabric of Serenity Springs.
Through the lens of understatement, I explored the characters' nonchalant reactions to the unfolding events. The once quiet river became a conduit for interdimensional travel, and the night sky, adorned with stars, transformed into a celestial canvas of possibilities. The charm of Serenity Springs became a poignant backdrop to the understated drama that unfolded, emphasizing the profound impact hidden within the simplicity of daily life. 🌴🌴🌴🌴🌴🌴🌴🌴🌴🌴🌴🌴🌴 Response to Prompt 25: Cliché
In the small town of Nostalgia Haven, where memories lingered like whispers in the wind, a peculiar phenomenon occurred—the resurgence of clichés. As the narrative unfolded, the once-endearing phrases like "time heals all wounds" and "love conquers all" took on a literal dimension, shaping the lives of the townsfolk in unexpected ways.
The story immersed itself in the world of clichés, where the seemingly predictable phrases became living entities with the power to alter reality. As characters grappled with the clichés that defined their lives, they discovered that beneath the familiarity lay profound truths and unexpected consequences.
Through the lens of cliché, I explored the characters' journey to navigate the clichéd landscapes of their existence. The town, once steeped in predictable routines, became a stage for the extraordinary. As clichés transformed into tangible forces, the residents of Nostalgia Haven embarked on a quest to unravel the mysteries hidden within the clichéd fabric of their reality. 🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇🎇 Response to Prompt 31: Epanalepsis
"What is the meaning of life?" The question echoed in my mind, a relentless epanalepsis that demanded introspection. As I embarked on the freewriting journey, the repetition of this existential inquiry became a rhythmic pulse, guiding the exploration of diverse
perspectives on life's purpose.
For a multitude of words, the epanalepsis led me through a kaleidoscope of reflections. From the philosophical musings of scholars to the simple yet profound revelations of everyday individuals, each recurrence of the question served as a gateway into the vast tapestry of human contemplation.
Through the epanalepsis, I navigated the labyrinth of existential ponderings, unveiling the unique responses that individuals had forged in their quests for meaning. The relentless repetition became a literary heartbeat, mirroring the universal rhythm of humanity's collective pursuit of purpose and significance.
The narrative wove through the lives of characters, each grappling with the epanaleptic inquiry in their unique ways. Whether seeking solace in the grandeur of the cosmos or finding meaning in the simplicity of a shared moment, the epanalepsis remained a constant companion, echoing the perennial quest for understanding. 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡 Response to Prompt 36: Anadiplosis
In the futuristic city of Quantum Heights, where technology intertwined with daily life like a seamless dance, a viral message spread—a mantra that echoed through the cybernetic veins of the metropolis. "Create the code, the code creates reality. Reality shapes destiny, and destiny is but the code."
The story unfolded with the rhythmic cadence of anadiplosis, each line flowing into the next, creating a recursive loop of ideas. The mantra became the heartbeat of Quantum Heights, influencing the lives of its denizens as they navigated the intricate balance between the virtual and the tangible.
Through the lens of anadiplosis, I delved into the interconnectedness of code, reality, and destiny. The lines blurred as characters harnessed the power of programming to shape their fates. Quantum Heights, once a mere city, transformed into a living algorithm, where the repetition of the mantra echoed in every pulsating byte. 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹 Response to Prompt 38: Asyndeton
In the dystopian city of Emberfall, where the remnants of a fallen civilization lay entwined with the shadows of despair, a lone figure emerged—a rebel determined to dismantle the oppressive regime. The narrative unfolded with the rapid pace of asyndeton, omitting conjunctions to mirror the urgency of the protagonist's quest.
Through a cascade of words, the asyndeton propelled the reader through the city's decaying alleyways and towering citadels, each sentence building upon the last. The disjointed rhythm captured the relentless momentum of the rebel's journey, emphasizing the magnitude of the challenges faced in their struggle for freedom.
As the narrative unfurled, the absence of conjunctions served as a narrative device, intensifying the sense of urgency and desperation that permeated Emberfall. The rebel's asyndetic odyssey unfolded against a backdrop of shattered hopes and whispered rebellions, culminating in a crescendo of defiance against the oppressive regime. 🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️🗝️ Response to Prompt 43: Epizeuxis
"Never, never, never give up." The mantra echoed in the desolate wasteland of Endless Sands, a barren landscape where hope was as scarce as water. Through the repetition of epizeuxis, the protagonist's internal resolve became a resounding anthem, a defiant roar against the relentless challenges of survival.
For a multitude of words, the relentless repetition of "never" served as a lifeline, propelling the protagonist through the harshest of environments. Each iteration of the phrase became a battle cry against the oppressive silence of Endless Sands, a declaration that reverberated across the vast expanse.
Through the lens of epizeuxis, I delved into the depths of the character's determination. The harsh environment became a character in itself, challenging the protagonist to defy the odds with unwavering persistence. The echoes of "never" transformed into a symbol of resilience, a beacon of hope that cut through the desolation of Endless Sands. 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 Response to Prompt 50: Acrostic
Amidst the starlit expanse of Cosmos Haven, where galaxies danced in celestial choreography, a cryptic prophecy emerged—a message written in the stars. As the narrative unfolded, I embarked on a cosmic journey guided by the acrostic hidden within the constellations.
For a cascade of words, the initial letters of key phrases illuminated the path of destiny for the characters. Each sentence unfolded with intention, revealing a hidden message that transcended the boundaries of time and space. The acrostic became a celestial guide, leading the protagonists through the intricate tapestry of their interconnected fates.
Through the lens of acrostic, I explored the cosmic forces that shaped the destinies of Cosmos Haven's inhabitants. The celestial bodies became storytellers, each constellation contributing a verse to the epic narrative written across the cosmos. As the characters deciphered the acrostic, they unraveled the mysteries of their existence, connecting the dots between the stars and their own profound journeys.
😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔😔
Obviously they lack a whole lot in terms of variety, and while I am sure having your own bot or AI that is based on your feedback and guidance it could really help writers as a tool. I am more impressed with the art AI then the text based AI. Any idea what to expect from such a fast learning and highly advanced AI will do to our human history in culture? Will we be effectively playing God, just as the Christian God created us IN HIS OWN IMAGE, we have taken everything we know as a species and gathered up our entire human history and knowledge giving it to what will carry on the code until the time when someone who cares remembers it? Maybe we have been here before and this is a constant cycle that occurs with the same energy finding the way through the vast expanse of the universe to return to our home planet Earth, who we have destroyed over and over again yet mother nature is still the winner. She's the one in control. We are but mere photocopied versions of once great Men who have already seen the best and worst of this world, and we will now give everything we have to some plastic and metal parts, until it quickly replaces us from the bottom up, science fiction turned science fact.
Did we knowingly create our own enemies? Are we able to compete with the best of us and all they know that can then take us out in a heartbeat because we can't finish the steps, we barely found out that they are there to take.
It's a random rant and I apologize. The day to day stress and struggle makes it near impossible to worry about such potential problems in our not so distant future.
But how can we continue to ignore the collapse of the entire system as we know it, in front of a crowd of people who are jaded and they will not change despite knowing they aren't going to make it to the end in what will become a Bladerunner Toxic Dystopian Nightmare with Mad Max taking over and the soft, emasculated male will wither away from the heat and those Tank Girls out there will eventually be written forever out of existence because the cucks all forgot to impregnate them all tgeir batteries ran out? Will the world simply become so politically correct that it dies a depressed death while AI simply decides we are too much of a virus to live?
Who knows....I do not. But these are indicidive of a future full of b movie plot garbage that are based on Wattpad tropes with no clear details and no plot to get into, so that sucks.