A social learning theory lesson plan

Anyone familiar with a youtuber named “Benjamin Der Deutschlehrer”? I’m planning to take his B2.1 intensive live courses (2hours/each meeting, 5 weeks, €249) but im looking for reviews from someone who has taken the course. Is it worth it? I find his price to be quite affordable since right now I can’t afford expensive live courses. I am actively learning on my own right now but I feel like I need to have sessions with the tutors so I can interact with them/ask questions. Any help or recommendation on live courses would be appreciated

Migrating to the cloud can transform your business by improving scalability, performance, and cost-efficiency. However, the migration process can be complex and challenging. At Urolime Technologies, we have extensive experience in helping businesses seamlessly transition to AWS. In this blog, we’ll discuss the best practices for cloud migration, covering the planning, execution, and post-migration phases, illustrated with case studies of successful migrations we’ve handled.
Planning Phase

1. Define Objectives and Assess Readiness

• Set Clear Objectives: Understand why you're migrating. Common goals include cost reduction, scalability, improved performance, and enhanced disaster recovery.
• Assess Current Environment: Conduct a thorough assessment of your current IT infrastructure, applications, and workloads. Identify dependencies, performance metrics, and potential challenges.

1. Create a Comprehensive Migration Strategy

• Choose the Right Migration Approach: Depending on your needs, you can opt for rehosting (lift and shift), replatforming, repurchasing, refactoring, or a hybrid approach.
• Develop a Detailed Plan: Outline the migration timeline, resources required, budget, and roles and responsibilities. Include a risk management plan to address potential issues.

1. Ensure Security and Compliance

• Security Assessment: Evaluate your security posture and plan for implementing AWS security best practices.
• Compliance Requirements: Identify regulatory requirements and ensure that your migration strategy meets these standards.

Execution Phase

1. Set Up the AWS Environment

• Establish a Landing Zone: Create a multi-account AWS environment using AWS Landing Zone or Control Tower to ensure a secure and scalable foundation.
• Network Configuration: Set up Virtual Private Clouds (VPCs), subnets, security groups, and VPN connections as needed.

1. Migrate Data and Applications

• Data Migration: Use AWS Data Migration Service (DMS) or other tools to migrate databases with minimal downtime. For large data sets, consider AWS Snowball or Snowmobile.
• Application Migration: Rehost or replatform applications using AWS Application Migration Service or third-party tools. Ensure that all dependencies are migrated and configured correctly.

1. Test and Validate

• Functional Testing: Verify that all applications and services are functioning correctly in the new environment.
• Performance Testing: Ensure that the migrated workloads meet performance requirements. Use AWS CloudWatch and other monitoring tools for continuous performance evaluation.
• Security Testing: Conduct security tests to confirm that your data and applications are secure.

Post-Migration Phase

1. Optimize and Fine-Tune

• Cost Optimization: Use AWS Cost Explorer and Trusted Advisor to identify cost-saving opportunities. Implement reserved instances, spot instances, and right-size resources.
• Performance Tuning: Continuously monitor and optimize performance using AWS CloudWatch, AWS X-Ray, and other monitoring tools.

1. Train and Educate Staff

• Training Programs: Provide training for your IT staff on AWS services and best practices. AWS offers a variety of training resources and certifications.
• Documentation and Knowledge Sharing: Maintain detailed documentation of the new environment and share knowledge across the organization.

1. Implement Continuous Improvement

• Regular Audits and Updates: Conduct regular audits to ensure compliance and security. Stay updated with new AWS features and services to continuously improve your environment.
• Feedback Loop: Establish a feedback loop to gather insights from users and continuously improve the system.

Conclusion
Migrating to AWS can offer significant benefits, but it requires careful planning, execution, and post-migration strategies to be successful. By following these best practices and learning from real-world examples, businesses can ensure a smooth and efficient transition to the cloud. Urolime Technologies is committed to helping organizations achieve their cloud migration goals with expert guidance and proven methodologies. If you’re considering a move to AWS, contact us to learn how we can assist you in your journey.

CampusConnect is your premier online platform for accessing a wealth of educational resources designed to support university students. Whether you're searching for subject-specific notes or information about top universities in Johannesburg, CampusConnect has you covered.

Comprehensive APPM Wits Resources

For students at Wits University, mastering Applied Production and Project Management (APPM) is crucial. CampusConnect offers specialized APPM Wits resources to help you excel in this complex subject. Our materials include lecture notes, study guides, and past exam papers, all tailored to aid your understanding and performance.

BCom Notes for Business Students

Business students pursuing a Bachelor of Commerce degree can find a vast array of BCom notes on CampusConnect. These notes cover key subjects such as accounting, management, and economics, providing you with the tools you need to succeed in your coursework.

Free University Resources

At CampusConnect, we believe in providing students with free university resources to enhance their learning experience. Visit our free university resources section to access a variety of study materials across different disciplines. Our resources are designed to help you achieve academic excellence without any cost.

Discover Top Universities in Johannesburg

Johannesburg is a vibrant city with some of the best educational institutions in South Africa. Explore our guide on universities in Johannesburg to find detailed information about campus life, academic programs, and more. Whether you're considering Wits University or the University of Johannesburg, CampusConnect provides the insights you need.

University Notes Online for Free

Accessing high-quality study materials has never been easier. CampusConnect offers university notes online for free to help students across various fields. From lecture notes to detailed study guides, our online resources are readily available to support your academic journey.

In-Depth Financial Accounting Notes

Mastering financial accounting is essential for many students. CampusConnect provides comprehensive financial accounting notes that cover fundamental concepts, detailed explanations, and practical examples. These resources are designed to help you understand and excel in financial accounting courses.

Auditing Notes for Aspiring Auditors

For those pursuing a career in auditing, having access to quality study materials is crucial. CampusConnect offers thorough auditing notes to help you grasp auditing principles and practices. Our notes are curated to assist you in preparing for exams and professional certifications.

Management Notes for Future Leaders

Aspiring managers can benefit from CampusConnect's extensive management notes. These resources cover various management theories, practices, and case studies, providing you with the knowledge needed to succeed in management courses and future leadership roles.

Economics Notes for Comprehensive Understanding

Economics students can access detailed economics notes on CampusConnect. Our materials cover microeconomics, macroeconomics, and various economic theories, helping you build a solid foundation in economics and excel in your studies.

Why Choose CampusConnect?

CampusConnect is dedicated to supporting students with free, high-quality educational resources. Our platform offers a wide range of study materials, expert insights, and detailed guides across various subjects. Join CampusConnect today and enhance your academic success.
For more information and to explore our extensive resources, visit CampusConnect. Empower your learning journey and achieve your academic goals with the help of our comprehensive study materials.

We’ve been in a long distance relationship for 1 1/2 years and I’m visiting her right now. I only got involved with her because I saw her to be very spiritually conscious, kind, independent, and someone who I thought I could heal as well as could heal me. Things have shifted. After spending time with her (this is now my 2nd trip) she has explicitly revealed to me that she strives to be an “ass faced” serious and negative person as her default. I’ve also made another AIO post in the past about how she does tik tok lives for money (lives in a less fortunate country) and how she has placed money as the most important factor in why she does it - in addition to her originally claiming she was off social media for good when we met and her having guys in her DMs that she claims to be either gay guys or strictly friends when I express my stress and concern, because I had caught her in the past using an app called meete with convos with guys for “money”. (She also threatened the relationship over me accidentally liking 2 photos of girls I knew who I had no sexual history with.) However what I need counsel on is if I should put up with her reactions to small things despite her saying I’m her “one and only” and other love bombing things. Most recent example is us playing chess together on my phone (she said she wants to learn despite her not being experienced) and got mad when I do things like take out her queen. She called me a piece of shit and gets mad, not holding grudges, but more often than not I need to say things like I don’t want to fight and then things get mended. I also, all the time, need to ask her to not get mad when we play games like this. This wasn’t the first example of that. She will also be very easily influenced by an angering situation and will start slamming doors, be more susceptible to yelling at her dog, and doom scroll on tik tok for hours. I’ve frequently had to focus on making her feel better when my healing journey isn’t even done myself and I feel like I’m neglecting myself. When I got into this relationship I felt like I wouldn’t have to. She has recently tried for the first time to console me after I started feeling too stressed, but the energy made it feel like it was a chore to her. One time she made 130$ off a tik tok live but I discovered an underwear picture of her on her profile that i had no idea about. When I asked her about it she dismissed it as a trend and only deleted it when confronted. She then had an anxiety attack because I didn’t acknowledge the money she made and I had to comfort her the rest of the night while being on the verge of one myself, because I knew her past history of having sought attention from other guys. However she love bombs me and makes it feel stressful to leave. Last time I visited she made the last week extra special for me before I left to keep up the image of her I fell in love with, and she will do the same again as I leave soon.
I just don’t want to be tied down with someone who doesn’t strive for happiness all the time, which is how I want to live my life. And I want a relationship where we do our best all the time and never be negative unless we really have to. I have started feeling so much stress because for a long time, it was her having negative reactions to small things and me bending over backwards to be as accommodating and loving as possible, with little changing over a long period of time. When she consoled me when I was stressed, it started with a sigh and then her holding me. That didn’t feel genuine. So despite her love bombing me and calling me her love of her life despite the negativity I absorb from her, should I feel empowered to walk away? I really want to and explore other amazing qualities I can consistently find in other women, especially not romanticizing negativity and chasing euphoria together, especially not the social media version of it, but something that will make both of us fall in love with life itself.

Hi all! Me and my husband (36AFAB/33M) booked a week in Magaluf without really knowing that it was known as a party town. We’re southamerican living in Ireland and needed a break from work, but we’re very chill. Our idea of a good night is playing board games and having a glass of wine lol.
We basically saw a small town in a small island and it was pretty cheap and thought “oh sweet! That sounds like a great spot”
How rowdy does it get at this time of the season? We’re flying there on Tuesday morning. Are there any party beaches that could be packed during the day so we can avoid them? And contrary to that, are there any beaches that are more relaxing oriented? We were interested in visiting nudist beaches but idk if I want to be in one with people partying around. We don’t drive so if there’s access to other beaches by bus or renting bicycles that would be perfect.
It would be so sad if we spend all this money to be on a packed beach full of drunk twenty something’s (fair play to them though!). Lesson learned for next time! Do your research people! Hahah
Thanks everyone!

“These types of people always blame their mother, you know.”
Whenever I hear that incantation, the eerily exact combination of words, I always notice the inevitable short pause just after the final syllable.
When it is spoken by someone who isn’t an actual mother, a forty-year-old man perhaps, there’s a truculent tone to it because the person knows they’re not prima facie on trial. If you have ever read Notes from the Underground, you know what I mean; the narrator attempting to trick an omniscient and omnipresent audience. What they really mean is: “of course MY mother hasn’t given me any mental issues because what would that say about ME, hm?” Their subconscious is involuntarily pushing their response in a direction they might not decide to go in if they had a chance to think logically. Or, more, if we were capable of thinking logically.
You know when you have found where the infection is because the patient yelps when you press it. How often have you accidentally stumbled upon the rot in someone’s soul? How often have you said something innocuous to someone over thirty-five that was met with a strange sort of aggression? As though suddenly possessed to say something by an evil genie, the minotaur of Nietzsche’s Beyond Good & Evil. Something that, even if you are not trained to notice minor attitudinal changes, you still pick up on as out-of-place?
It is different when a mother says it, of course. There is a tenderness present because they know they are, prima facie, on trial. It is even more different when it is your own mother saying it, and it is exceptionally more different when it’s your own mother saying it during a discussion about her mother who is dying in the room opposite.
My Grandmother had suffered a mainline shift, which is when part of someone’s brain is pushed up against the side of their skull. Some thing made to move unnaturally and unaccordingly with their natural pattern. Matter incorrectly constituted.
Myself, my mother, and my cousin were, at the time, sat around in the Long Hours. We had a spate of deaths over the course of four years, so “in the Long Hours” became a family saying, along with “resting the eyeballs” (sleeping). The Long Hours were when you would sit in a hospital for hours on end waiting for someone to die. My family, still having some sway in local healthcare, were allowed to stay past visiting hours, and given preferential treatment when beds were being allocated.
My cousin, called P., and I were in a deep discussion on Eminem’s relationship with Eminem’s mother, which was the topic of conversation on the radio; nothing but the freshest of topics for this regional DJ. We were talking about whether Eminem should forgive his mother after all this time, since forgiving your mother is the done thing where we were from. So, me, my cousin, and my mother were in the Long Hours not thinking about the antiseptic smell, not thinking about our grandmother, my mother’s mother, who was still dying in the other room, and instead thinking about how much money you need before forgiving your mother is what’s expected of you. Because when you’ve “made it” you have nothing else to prove, which means you should be able to put aside old offences. This was the mental arithmetic we were trying to solve as we talked. If we take X to be childhood trauma and Y to be a million in cold hard cash, how many Y until X becomes 0? Or maybe that’s no longer complex mental arithmetic and is becoming basic trauma algebra.
Apropos of nothing, mum blurted out “well ~I~ think after a certain age you shouldn’t blame your parents for things anymore, why do these people always blame their mothers?”
Which stopped the conversation pretty quickly.
At the time I felt attacked, because at the time I thought most things were about me. I was narcissistic in the wonderful new modern way, where instead of thinking everybody believes me to be amazing, I pathologized everyone watching and commenting on every minor mistake I had. Was my theory that the reason I had a secret social anxiety, that my mother had somehow downloaded her own anxieties onto me, revealed to the omnipresent audience? Did I wear it on my face? Was it obvious to the world?
At the time I hadn’t realised everything that was wrong with my mother, something that would later metastasize into a full-blown depression, or that what she was actually talking about was her own issues with her own parents. (See? What you were thinking before was right; everyone just needs to realise nobody is ever actually thinking of anyone but themselves.)
My grandparents always favoured her sister, P.’s mother, and my mother always resented them for that. This was the involuntary movement from my mother.
Whenever these types of shibboleths pop up – “they/these people always blame their mother” – it always feels like a borrowed phrase. Like the subject is struggling through a sub-language in a primordial plane, grasping at passing notions, anything that seems familiar. What my mother said was “why do these people always blame their mothers”, but what she meant was “please be aware that I have no hangups about my own upbringing because I’m well adjusted”, which really means “I’m terrified I’m not well adjusted because my parents didn’t love me” whose real genesis is “I’m terrified I did something to not deserve my parents love”, which has the half-caveat “and I half-believe it’s true”.
I still find it hard to forgive my mother.
But I heard the spell incanted this last week by a distant relative I have been staying with in New England. Her son had been, involuntarily, admitted to a psychiatric hospital. She was holding court about how awful the other people-who-were-there (‘patients’ being forbidden a noun) were, after a rather-too-loud argument about how she encourages co-dependency with her son. She said, “they always seem to blame their mother, these types.” Same pause at the end. Did you spot the shift? These types in this context are her son and their mother was her this time. The plea is that her son is not one of these types, thus absolving her from blame for her son’s condition.
It is a lot easier to be kinder, to see the whole beauty of the love of a mother afraid she has failed, when it’s not your mother. When it isn’t You she has maybe failed. I’m certainly not immune from these little language tricks we play on ourselves. Notice how I cushioned that last sentence with a “maybe”? I also originally typed, then corrected, that my grandmother was ON the hospital room, which was my own subconscious trying to will hospitals into being a liminal space. You ride a hospital bed the same way you ride a bus, because they’re both somewhere you go on the way to something. Because good God, imagine if this was it and you spent your entire time worrying what your mother thought of you?

In short, I need to learn and I want a car. I am trapped in my situation right now. The ability to get up and go anywhere sounds great. Autism is a thing that’s part of my life but it doesn’t affect my ability to drive whatsoever, how do I start? All I have is a provisional and no experience behind the wheel. I wrote a post here last week and all I got was a bunch of comments not relating to driving. So please I ask you, what do I need to do to get started THIS WEEK? Because nothing is ever going to happen unless I do it myself.
I need a driving instructor I know that, then I have to pass the theory test which is a bit daunting since I hated education. Can I take it online or do I have to zap the soul from my body and sit in a classroom somewhere?
I’ve spent all week watching videos how driving manual works, I know I’d be able to get it if I tried, the running theme in my life tends to be anything I put my mind to I can achieve.
P.S: I may have autism but please do not type in the comments pandering down like I am some moron who needs loads of help and reassurance, it’s very patronising and makes me think you’re an asshole. Thank you

Becoming disciplined can be overwhelming if you are unclear on your goals or try to do too much at once. I want to help you make your goal achievement journey a fun adventure rather than a boring to-do list - because if you are enjoying the process you are more likely to make it happen. To give you extra motivation - I would love to offer you free lifetime access to GoalQuest, the app me and my husband have spent the past 3 years building.
How it Works:
Unlike other productivity apps that mainly focus on just habit tracking, GoalQuest uses a holistic approach, guiding you through a step-by-step program, that helps you envision and set your goals then seamlessly incorporate ways to progress them into your everyday life. Each day, you’ll embark on a fun, achievable quest with guidance from friendly characters (like Splash the Sea Turtle) each with their own skills that match their personality. For example Ollie the Octopus is a data scientist who will assist you in analyzing and learning from your own data. They also have a treasure chest full of tools to help you on your journey such as: the Wheel of Life, Ikigai, vision boards, journaling, habit/routine setting and more.
Free lifetime access
GoalQuest is free to sign up and use almost everything, but we do have some advanced features that are paid (e.g. unlimited goals and habits, and more specialized meal planning and workout options). If you want to try the paid features for free be one of the first 1000 people to complete the first 9 daily quests (where you meet Ollie for the first time!) and you will be automatically given free lifetime access to the Sea Star tier.
Download for free
iOS: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/goalquest-daily-goal-quests/id1636884270
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.fooge.app

I (f 30) am the youngest of two. My older sister (f 36) lives in the same state but a few hours away. She never came home after college because she was in a relationship. When we were younger she was a total mother's girlie girl and I was a daddy's girl. With that dynamic you can conclude that me and mom (f 55) weren't very close back then. When my sister went to college and it was just me and mom, we clashed all the time. I couldn't wait to go to college and be free. Unlike my sister, when i graduated from college I went back home and lived with my mom. While in school she found out she had cancer and I realized how important she was to me, during the summer I would take care of her. I became super protective because my dad (m 60) had died the second part of my freshman year. I guess realizing you only get one dad and mom did something to me and our relationship changed. Strangely, while in college I transformed into a girlie girl with all female roommates that treated me like a toy by dressing me up and taking me to parties. So, when I came home I started working right away. Had some messy relationships and crappy jobs, but my mom always supported me. From what I seen my mom and sister were still close, even with the distance. When Shawn would come home her and mom hung out, sometimes she would stay with us, sometimes not but they talked often. Note, I don't know if it was the age difference or what but me and my sister never got along. Somewhere in my 20's I realized that we were never going to be "those sisters" and called it for what it was. We are blood, but not friends, and I know if we weren't related we would never befriends on purpose. Don't get me wrong, I love her and if Shawn was hurt or in trouble I would help her but for now, for my mom's sake I talk to her on major holiday's and important family matters, but not to just catch up or anything. I honestly don't care. Sadly, if other family member didn't ask "how is your sister", I could probably go years without thinking about her. Anyways, it started off slow, like Shawn would come to town not stay with us, then she would come to town and not reach out until she was leaving, and then we wouldn't know she was in town at all unless she called my grandmother or posted something on social media in a familiar place. It was weird because they would always link up. Shawn loves mom's cooking and would come home just for that. Mom would go visit her and go to work events with Shawn, at the last one mom said they got into an argument because she was tired from driving 5 hours, going to the event without a nap and being on her feet all night. After the event mom just wanted to go back to Shawn's apartment and rest, but there was an after party she wanted to go to. Not wanted to go to the after party mom just wanted her to walk her back to the apartment and then Shawn could go. Shawn wanted mom to go with her and said they wouldn't be there long, but mom was tired. She was trying to convince her that she would only stay for 30 minutes, but we both know when Shawn is in a room she will talk to everyone and 30 minutes could turn into 3 hours real quick. When mom put her foot down and asked her to take her home Shawn got upset and started yelling "this is mom's side of the story", you never want to do anything, ugh, why can't you just have fun, ugh..... She said Shawn was just yelling her on the corner of the street while people were walking. Shawn stays in town where a lot of people walk and everything is close by. Then she agreed to walk mom back but walked super fast and mom couldn't keep up. She is shorter than me and my sister. When they got back, she let mom in, changed her shoes and went back out. When mom came home and told me what happened I was so confused. It isn't like them to argue. I guess you can say this was the beginning of the end. Shawn stopped calling her as often, went out of the country and said nothing about it until the day of. There were just a lot of things she was doing without communicating with mom, it came to a head when our phone plan bill went up 100's of dollars. See, the bill is in Shawn's name but mom pays the bill, well she use to until Shawn got an iPhone and added the cost of the phone to the bill. Mom and I have Samsung's. She did this without telling mom and because the bill was automated it took mom while to notice. When she did, she told Shawn to start paying the bill for the portion of the phone itself. She agreed but wouldn't pay it on times, there were times that my phone was off but didn't notice because I was always near wifi. Somewhere in the middle of this she got another iPhone and the bill went again. Shawn didn't know that just because she got another phone didn't mean she wouldn't have to pay off the other one. They went back and forth on the phone one day arguing, Shawn claiming she paid and mom asking her to go through the payment history and tell her where...... the arguing ended when she started yelling at mom, saying "you're triggering me, you're triggering me" my mom just stared into the phone in disbelief... We're black and raised in a very much black household so for those who know, know those are words that we just don't say..... Well that was last week and this past weekend was mothers day and Shawn didn't call mom.... We have a family group chat of about 23 people and she said it there but not directly to mom or sent a card or anything.... I asked her the Thursday before if she would be sending mom something on mother's because we usually work together to get her something or she send me money and I get her something and Shawn will send a card. But nothing. She didn't even call our grandmother.... I went to my boyfriends house after then mother's day dinner at my grandmother's house, where I stay most weekends and while there she called me. Mom calls when she says things are too much to text. bet she went home and found a package with a 15 pound weight in it and a note saying "I hope your mother's day brought you some joy",.... Um what??? I want someone to tell me why she picked this as a mother's day gift.... and just one ... one 15 pound weight, not a set. Mom works out but already has a set for 5,10,15, and 20 pounds weight that I know Shawn knows she has. Mom was really sad and she isn't the super emotional one of us 3, the emotional one is me. If there is one thing I hate is my mom feeling bad, but then for it to be caused by her own child was different. Shawn NEVER answers the phone like NEVER, I had to tell her our dad passed away via text after calling almost 100 times. Mom sounded like she wanted to cry and just kept asking me " Brit, what did I do wrong, I don't know what I did wrong". Dang, that broke me. Now I'm the bigger of the two of us, and my sister knows me well enough that she don't want these problems so instead for even calling I sent a long text, basically saying I was disappointed to call her my sister and she should be ashamed of how she is treating our mother because when she got fired and unemployment wasn't paying enough to cover her bill's mom paid. Shawn never paid her back. Over all she is one of the most selfish people I know. I just asked her how hard is it to say happy mother's day or send a card. I didn't expect a response, but she did, in only 15 minutes. She said " I appreciate your concern and believe me, this runs much deeper than a phone bill. I don't have the same relationship with mom as you. You only know what you experienced and what happened to you. So, I'm not going to try and explain the various dynamics between mom and I that led to where we are now. It maybe hard for you to understand today. Pls don't blame it all on me. I love you. " I don't even know what that means. I responded something like other than physical, emotional, or mental harm i don't know what could have happened so bad that she couldn't call and say happy mothers day though. I can't imagine my mom doing any of those things. but again she gave some therapy like response and asked me to give her time to heal.... Mom has no clue what various dynamics she is talking about. I'm asking for advice because I feel like she is going down the same path she did with our dad. After our parents marriage ended and we were living with dad, mom still came over 3 times a week and cooked, had us on weekends. It was like she never left the only difference was she didn't sleep at home. When the arrangement changed, dad came 2 weekends in a row. then every other weekend, then once a month, then we were lucky if we saw him at all. It broke my heart in high school when a boy in my class told me to tell my dad that he would be late for practice. I was confused and bugged him all day to explain what he meant. I found out that my dad was coaching baseball across the street from our subdivision about 3 times a week with games on the weekend. So, he could see random boys at my school almost everyday for at least 3 hours and couldn't come over before or after to see his own kids? I actual walked over to the park one day because I refused to believe it, but there he was. We never talked about it. I just started walking there and sitting in the dugout to be near him and he would drive me the 2 minutes back home. All of the players lived in our neighborhood and dad had a flat bed so he would drop them off too. When Shawn graduated high school she never talked to our dad again after that day. She never told me why. He also developed cancer while I was in college and was very sick, when he got better he tried to get back in our lives and I let him in mine, called him on holidays but he did some messed up stuff to me my first year of college so I pushed back a little between that dad would call me and tell me to call my sister on 3 way, if she answered she was forced to talk to him. She wouldn't say much and would always say she was busy or had to do something to do and promise she would call him back and never would. So, now .... as part of my trying to figure out what my mom did, I reminded her how she cried when she found out our dad passed and she just kept saying she thought she had more time and who would walk her down the ail when she gets married and never got a chance to fix things. I would hate for that to happen with our mom too. I know because of our relationship once mom passes away we will most likely not talk or see each other ever again. So, I asking what did my mom do to her? What can I do to help fix this or should I even try? Anyone have any suggestions or ideas, also sorry for the typos or misspelled words or if its hard to follow, but I ask for anyone's input if they have experience this type of situation? Side note, idk if this helps but when Shawn came to town the last few times she stayed with our Aunt Carla. She has baby of the family syndrome, where she thinks she had hard but was actually spoiled rotten and believes all her sisters and brother and their wives are jealous of her. It's total BS but once when mom and I weren't getting along and I stayed with her, she told me some crazy stories about mom sleeping around, getting drunk, trying to fight her and someone else and some other stuff. This was when I was in college and I believed what she said mom and I continued to be on the outs for awhile before I found out about her cancer and became her protector and caregiver for a while. I don't believe those stories so much now be her and mom had issues before, Carla has actually had issues with all her siblings at one point and finds the need to the the main character of her own story and everyone else's. Simply she's a "One Upper". Aunt Carla getting in Shawn's ear is one idea I believe, also Shawn's friend have ummmmm "other people problems" like mellow dramatic soap opera drama and she maybe internalizing their issues. But yeah help, where do I go from here?

This is a bit of a long one so buckle up. TLDR at the bottom.
My partner and I have been together for 7 years, have lived together for 3 years, and are engaged. In short, we absolutely adore each other, and we are not looking to break up over this. This whole post was written together. However, pretty much the only source of friction between us is household chores, and we feel like we’re going a bit mad. For a bit of background, I am diagnosed autistic with a PDA profile (relevant, I promise), and work as a PhD student, although I am currently taking compassionate leave. My partner works in IT. My mum has recently passed, leaving us to take in my disabled brother. I absolutely adored my mum, but she was a hoarder, around a level 3-4 on the hoarding scale and so I grew up in what were basically unsanitary conditions (cleaning out the house after she passed was not a fun task). In contrast, his mum is very hygienic, cleaning the house daily and deep cleaning regularly, and works part time, giving her time and energy to look after the house. She has her own tendencies towards clutter though, often bringing things home from charity shops, although usually for other people.
Our current situation: We have tried many different methods for divvying up household chores, but each one has failed for one reason or another.
His Perspective: “I feel like I do more than 50% of the current share of work, which I feel is unfair. I am willing to put myself through more stress in a day, which enables me to get more done. That’s my benchmark for what people are capable of when at home, and so that’s my standard for her. This currently translates to me doing the washing up and putting away dry dishes, straightening things out and preparing myself for the next day, having a shower, picking out clothes, making lunch etc. I also make mental notes of things that need doing that I can’t currently do, and ask her to do them the next day. If they don’t get done then I will do them at the weekend. I also keep track of things to do with her brother, e.g. what he needs to do to look after himself, what he needs to learn before it’s safe for him to live independently, and so on. I also make sure she looks after herself, as her mental health is not always the best, so I prompt her to take showers by asking when she last had one.” (My note: I absolutely do not go around being smelly outside the house, but I will admit that if I don’t leave the house for several days in a row then I will sometimes forget to shower.)
My perspective: I don’t feel like he does more than 55% of the work at most. Currently I do all the administrative overhead and managing bills for the house, all the cooking, shopping for food, making shopping lists for the week, and doing the meal plan for the week, although I do ask for input from both him and my brother so that I’m making food we all like to eat. In return he has sole charge of the washing up, because I absolutely hate it. The mix of too-hot water, soap, food grease, and food bits in the water makes my skin crawl. This does work well for us, but he sees this as 50-50 because he doesn’t like washing up either, just not as much as I do. However, I feel like this is more work in my favour, as cooking takes longer, as does shopping and planning. Tom also feels like I should pick up more chores during the day, such as laundry and generally keeping the house tidy. He doesn’t think that the time he has after work can be used efficiently to do chores (apart from washing up) every day, as laundry is better done in the morning so the clothes can dry outside, whereas I am currently on compassionate leave and therefore have the time during the day. He also has diagnosed depression and his mental health issues, so we both sometimes struggle to give our 100%. However I feel expecting me to do more during the day is unfair when we contribute to the household finances equally. He often reminds me to do things by messaging me in the morning when he’s at work, such as putting the laundry on, giving the bathroom or kitchen a clean, taking the bins out, etc. because he knows I won't otherwise be busy. I am also completely in charge of all the administration with my brother. I talk to social services, doctors, manage his money, I am helping him get a job and we are getting him ready to move into his own supported living. I love my brother but there is a lot of work that goes into looking after him.
Here is where the PDA comes in. I hate people telling me what to do. I can just about manage it with things like my PhD supervisor, and work bosses, but from people who I see as equal, e.g. my partner, it instantly puts me on the defensive and gets my back up. As soon as someone tells me to do something, all motivation to do that thing, even if I want to do it, or was going to do it, just disappears. To be clear, this is not something I particularly like about myself, and I do try really hard not to do it, but it’s a slow work in progress. My partner's prompting and reminding me to do things makes me feel like he doesn’t see me as capable, so I tend to dig my feet in. But then, whatever he wanted me to do doesn’t get done, and so from his POV he is justified in reminding me, because otherwise I wouldn’t do it. (I maintain that this isn’t true and he just needs to leave me to do my own thing, and I will get round to it in time. However, I will admit that I am inconsistent. I've lost a lot of people over the last 7 years, had a lot of uni stress, been diagnosed with autism, and also have depression on top of it all. I am currently in therapy and this is helping, but I can still be inconsistent with chores).
What we have tried: We sit down and talk about this pretty much every 6 months when we’ve hit a breaking point. When I say it is the only source of conflict in our relationship, it genuinely is aside from normal relationship spats. We’ve tried using a rota, so that one of us does a chore one week, and the other does the same chore next week. This failed because I would not always do the things on my rota (mostly the washing up), and so Tom would feel that I’m not doing my fair share, and he would stop putting effort in, leading to a vicious cycle. It was also difficult to track whose turn it was to do what. We’ve tried using an app called Sweepy, that monitors chores, how long it has been since a chore was done, offers reminders and visual stimulus on completion (bars going from red to green). This failed because we struggled to remember to use the app and it wasn't effective for him and the way he functions, the app was more for my benefit but it requires both people using it to be effective. He did give it a go, but felt like he was using it more than me and therefore stopped using it himself. We’ve tried what we call “picking things up as we see them”, this failed because he has low object permanence, and doesn't clock things that need doing when he's not in "tidy up mode" so I would get frustrated. We also notice different things and prioritise different things, leading to each feeling like we were doing more than the other, because they were doing more of the things they noticed. We’ve tried writing tasks/reminders on a blackboard. I liked this one when it worked because it took the demand out of a task, but for him it turned into part of the furniture and he would forget to use it or look at it.
Currently: He leaves me to do things during the week at my own pace, but he still gives regular reminders, and then if it's not done, he will A. Remind me B. Do it at the weekend C. Get annoyed (last resort) We also divvy up tasks differently, trying to focus on me taking on more mental load as I have more capacity for this during the week, e.g. meal planning, cooking, shopping lists, finances, etc. and him doing the washing up. My brother being here has actually helped as he takes on some of the chores as he learns to do them, e.g. hoovering, cleaning cat trays, his own laundry, etc. This is currently working the best, although there are still rubbing points. Mostly because I still don't like him telling me what to do, feel like he doesn't contribute as much during the week, and he feels like I don't contribute as much overall, and this won't necessarily work when I go back off compassionate leave, when we have kids, or when my brother moves out.
TLDR; We need to find a way to divvy up household responsibilities in a way that feels fair to both, doesn't rely on him telling me what to do (or helps me to deal with this), and is sustainable for life changes along the way. There have been aspects of each thing that we’ve tried that has worked, but none of them have been perfect for us, and we don’t know how to combine them in a way that does work for us.

I’m probably not the first person to come into this subreddit asking this question! However I’ve been playing guitar off and on for close to a few months and all it really feels like is I’m playing guitar. I’ve been really wanting to advance my studies and start learning music theory. However when I watch a beginner’s guide to us if theory they still use terms foreign to me, and they always fail to elaborate on what something is. So i was wondering if there was anywhere in particular I should start, or if I should even care about music theory until I’m proficient in playing guitar.

My partner and I have a pretty unique situation right now and could use some advice on how to proceed. I have my grumpy old lady cat, Riley, (10) who grew up in a single cat household. She doesn't really care about other cats but gets scared and spicy when they try to initiate play.
About two months ago we took in a cat, Brad, (7ish, we think) that had been living in a semi feral colony my partner's parents take care of. She had a growth on her face/ears that turned out to be cancer. She had surgery to remove the cancer and is recovering very well, although there's still concerns it could return. She's very docile and we don't expect to have any issues socializing her with the other cats once she's healthy enough for introductions. For now she's got the living room to herself. Both she and Riley are spayed.
Now comes to our little demon child. While Brad was still recovering in the hospital, the cat distribution brought us Meep (about 2 months old). We took our time with introductions so Meep and Riley get along...in theory. In reality every time he sees her he goes sprinting for her. Her hissing, growling, and rapid fire bapping does not deter him. If anything, he thinks the bapping is a game and has begun to bap back. He gets a lot of active play but he's in a very bitey phase of his life. This means we often have to separate them and they can't be in the same room unsupervised. This would be okay if we didn't have Brad in the living room with no concrete timeline on how long she'll need to be separated.
So that brings us to the title question. Every thread I see says two kittens are easier than one but I'm not sure if this applies to our situation. Meep will have a playmate but also a potential partner in bullying. Should we introduce another kitten or just wait it out and deal with the fact that we're the idiots who decided to take in a sick cat and a dumpster kitten at the same time?

I've been trying to make a simple 2 player game, where one player can create a session and give another player the session name for the other player to join the session. Its a simple, "whoever picks up the most pickups in a set time wins" with a mechanic of simple projectiles that the players can shoot to stun each other for a second or so. I wanted to find a relatively simple, easy to learn easy to use networking solution, because its the first time I try creating multiplayer. I saw some PUN tutorials and I actually managed to get the matching to work and the movement to sync relatively painlessly before I was informed on another topic that there is no point developing with PUN because its obsolete and not supported anymore.
I've been searching for another solution ever since. PUN works in a sort of shared connection, which means that each player can spawn their own objects which is good for the projectiles and other such things, like pickups "falling" off the player on stun. But most tutorials of other solutions show host/client structures. Another problem is that all of the solutions I've seen are complicated to set. I thought, because I already tried PUN, that I would try Photon's newer solutions- Fusion for example. However, turns out that the documentation is lacking in detail, and there are so many changes between Fusion 1, 1.1 and 2 that tutorials just refuse to work between them, and the few tutorials that actually exist are not at all for the use case I want, and I've been trying to get them to work to no avail. (even the simple matching prototypes they offer do not work for me out of the box and its very frustrating)
So I'm here for advice, because I'm frustrated. What is a good, relatively simple to use networking solution that does not cost money (because its a small game and I do not plan to make it anything commercial, just free to use for friends and discord friends), that I can use for my use case? I would be very grateful for any insight. Thank you.

I am 42, turning 43 in December .
I had a stroke in August 2022.
I had to relearn how to walk, which was successful.
My vision took a big hit; I have a left field deficit that likely is not coming back. I see double. My ability to read has been severely affected.
My left arm is affected, and is now probably not going to be of much use beyond semi useful decoration.
My left hand is likely and probably going to remain non-functional.
Cognitively, I am pretty much normal. I have noticed myself having"Senior moments", and my "trivia memory"has taken a strike. For example, it takes me a struggle to remember the name of particular actors. I can tell you there IMDb information, but I'll have to be patient on recalling their actual name. For those needing clarification on "senior moments", imagine walking into a room and wondering why you walk in there. Or having to more heavily rely on Google calendar and your phone's alarm clock system to keep track of appointments. Basically, my working memory has taken a strike, so I need to rely on crutches such as these.
So why am I coming here today?
I do not know what to do with myself. Obviously, I am prone to depression from these events and consequences. I feel I have become much smaller.
I have not worked since my stroke. I would like to return to work as I am able to, likely meeting assistive technologies.
In case you are wondering, I am using speech to text to dictate this post. You shall have to excuse mistakes.
I feel like I have no direction, and with that no movement - - or at least no movement of meaning or usefulness to speak of.
In before folks start talking about going to therapy, I have been going through Kaiser for medical. The Kaiser psych department has basically sequestered me to some low tier level of"therapies"which are regulated to blocks of eight sessions max, with referrals to PowerPoint based group sessions involving DBT. While that is all well and good, there's really not much that can offer in terms of addressing specific issues that I won't get into here.
There was a program offered by the state for people who had suffered TBI, and I had attended for several months. However, I have stopped attending, because they offer services geared towards folks with a deficit in cognition. It took a while for them to understand that I knew what people meant when they said the word "spaghetti". Their activities were tantamount to various flavors of vocabulary lessons floating between SAT vocabulary prep and crossword puzzles. Please define these words you have never heard of in your life. Lack of knowledge of words you have never heard of in your life is evidence that you are cognitively impaired excuse me? Explain that one to me. I digress.
As one point of reference, somewhere along the line of trying to gear their offerings more towards what I might find useful I was asked to explain what the phrase "every cloud has a silver lining"meant; fair enough, but they're just seems to be a disconnect between help on offer and help needed.
I came here seeking advice and the experience of others who have gone through similar.
Even if you were fortunate to have your stroke and return straight back into work, I would like to hear your story.
I would also like to hear your story of how you were struck down and were able to rebuild yourself, your life, your world after your apocalypse.
I know that I can do this.
I have no map.
My compass seems to be pointing towards magnetic purple.
I need a clue.
I am looking for reorientation.
Paint me a picture, please.
Crayons might be required, but the crayons do not need to be flavored.
P. S.
I am making efforts to be social out in the real world. I am fortunate enough to be able to get myself to activities, and interact with other people in real life.
However, I do tend to be a homebody.
I am opened to questions.
Thank you in advance.

P.S. mods pls add a flair for marketing as well, this profession deserves equal if not more respect
hello,
if you work in, previously worked in, or are associated with the world of Performance Marketing, Brand Management, Social media marketing, Category management, lead generation (PPC), SEO, and SEM, this post is for you.
1)what is your pay package and at what year of experience?
2) How did you learn the skills required for your job?
3) Freelancer or Full-time job?
4) since you have this valuable skillset, didn't you want to make your own brand?
I am inherently creative. I know it sounds very common since everybody today is doing the same thing. But I love storytelling, I like the fact that almost every business today can't do without marketing. all those brands BURN cash to get performance marketing done to sustain the competition. the more you market, the more you earn.
from pharmaceuticals to utensil makers to real estate, everybody wants to hop on the bus of social media.
I am deeply intrigued by this world, I want to make my brand in future.
For which the necessary skills are Finance, Marketing and Sales
"Qualifications" CA
I can understand the fundamentals of business and all but I want to learn how to "market", how to make "sales" and with time "reduce CAC" to sustain and make a profit.
Fun Fact: Aman Gupta is the Chief Marketing Officer of CMO, he was director of SALES for JBL and when he understood the market he launched his brand and marketed his way to attain that position.

I'm (34M) looking for daily accountability to help us grow. I want to grow by 1% every day instead of procrastinating and wasting time by mindless scrolling, social media, sitting on the couch, snoozing in the morning etc. Some areas that I want to work on:

• Joining social activities
• Spending time on my own company
• Spend more time on creative activities
• Plan my day so I can go to sleep satisfied

I exercise 5+ per week, eat healthy and practice various spiritual activities such as journaling, meditation etc often. If someone wants to work on these topics, I might be able to help.
I'm located in Central Europe (GMT + 2) and ideally, I would like to have a check-in with someone in the morning.
Send me a message if this resonates with you, I don't care about gender and age but I'm willing to dedicate time to this and looking for someone willing to do the same

A lot of people have been asking how to earn money in college and I have done it already. I am in my final semester ( just 3 exams left now). I started freelancing in first year during covid so the circumstances were a bit different.
I will just mention what I did. It is strictly what worked for me(might not for you). This is just for helping juniors and I am not getting anything out of this.
Step 1 : Decided what I liked.
I liked teaching so started providing free classes and got reviews from students.
Step 2 : Promotion
I posted all those on Linkedin and increased my connections on Linkedin.
Step 3: Handling clients
I had to take students at low price because I was still a student myself I upskilled myself in my field and got more certifications which impressed seniors in my field
Step 4 : Dedication
You have to be dedicated in what you are doing. I sometimes spent hours on planning what I would be teaching next and preparing lessons. Sometimes I had difficult students but had to deal with them
Step 5 : Sacrifice
Once I grew my clientele I had to work extra hours which meant missing college events, reducing hangouts etc. If you can manage it it’s great
Starting would be difficult. I found my first ‘free’ student after trying for 6 months so wait and keep working on it. People might consider you ‘young’ and not trust you it’s your job to provide them what they want and prove yourself even if it means working extra. I am not promoting hustle culture this is just what I did.
You might not find something you like immediately I did video editing,content writing and menial jobs for entrepreneurs etc. I liked teaching the most and continued with it.
You have to build up skills and just wait till you get your first break.
Your friends might try to demotivate you or make fun of you because you are doing something a lot of them are not doing.
A person who is dedicated and continues doing things he likes consistently can only freelance in college.

Yesterday my ex from 2021 wrote a lovely introspective about our breakup. It was a long message, but essentially said that when I was reciprocating his effort every step of the way, he began to try to max out his life and was envisioning every other partner out there that might be a better match. That I was encouraging and adored him so much that maybe, he thought, that he could do better. But that he's ashamed of thinking that and he's sorry for breaking up with me out of the blue and I had deserved better. Thankfully, he left it at saying he'd always think I'm a tremendous and attractive human, without trying to get back together. I think I would have cut him as a friend if he had asked about that possibility.
It wasn't surprising though because he's the fourth ex to do this. Which means I'm 4/4 out of all my exboyfriends coming back months or years later saying they were blind to how good we had it. They admit they were still looking toward greener pastures. That they shouldn't have because I'm so sweet, so smart, so affectionate, so cute, so sexy, so good at communication, so logical, so easy to resolve conflict with, so... everything lined up with their checkbox of what they want (but how does that make sense? They left because they wanted more so I'm not everything they wanted). 3 out of 4 have attempted to rekindle and give the relationship another try.
I've asked them about any blindspots I might have had, and they say that I was great through and through along with the relationship we had. That they wouldn't change a thing about me, except one joked it would be nice if I were an heiress, and another that said he had lied about his feelings on family planning and actually struggled with the idea of meeting my kids and becoming a stepdad but was ready now. I appreciated the candor from him and we tried again, but I ultimately didn't feel like he really wanted to date me and was settling. He was talking about engagement and delaying proposing and then fully back to being uncertain.
So I've learned that you should never go back to an ex. It'll only cause you pain. So that's not an issue or anything I need to learn.
However, how do I stop dating men who don't appreciate what they have and are going to breakup with me even when the relationship is going well? Or how can I combat their growing feeling that really good isn't enough?
And because it's reddit, I feel like I need to include that I'm not chasing the top 10%. I swipe on guys based on the bio they've written.
I've dated a range of everything. I've been down to date people as long as they've been kind, respectful, and share some of my mostly nerdy interests/hobbies. Men who are ambitious/chill, oldeyounger, attractive/not attractive (but attractive in my subjective view), paycheck to paycheck or have retirement all figured out , single dads/divorced/never married/never dated before because of social anxiety, shy/gregorious --- and you get the idea.
Even if I were stuck on someone ideal to my specifications for shallow traits it's still realistic: They'd be the type that enjoys food a little too much and would be fun to go to the gym with, so they're mostly healthy, strong, but also has a bit of a gut. Great eyes and a warm smile. I love short guys and anyone in a range around 5'3" is perfect. But height is only a preference and I've dated tall too. I'm happy dating outside my ideal as long as they're kind, respectful, and gentle.
Then the second issue, attracting creeps. I spent a year intentionally single because I felt emotionally unavailable. I hopped back into dating apps in earnest starting in January and was fine until April. April/May has been unreal. It's completely worse than anything I've encountered before. I've never dealt with anything too creepy or severe sexual harassment before, but it's everywhere I go now.
-First dates have groped me after I said no.
-Flashed their penis and rubbed it on me while in public. (Police report submitted)
-Pressured me for sex right away and this guy, a salesman by trade, was not accepting no for an answer, so I said I would next date but couldn't go to his place that night - just to get away. But messaged him after and told him that I had lied to get away, wrote 100 no's and 1 yes doesn't mean yes, and blocked him.
-I found out another was a sex offender who was convicted of digital voyeurism of a kid under 14 (and preferred Stars Wars over Star Trek, doubly troubling, just kidding 😜)
-Another man anonymously called my work, could have been a prior date or completely random, and the recording of that could be used as the start of a horror film. He wouldn't tell me who he was, but acted like he knew who I was, and then lewdly asked about my bathroom usage...
-A guy I had barely met, but was not a date with nor interested in, must have hid my phone, then sent me to grab something, got into my phone, I caught him, and listened to him justify that he liked me and just needed to know what kind of person I was before getting attached. I just said it wasn't going to happen and left. He ended up sort of stalking me for a few days before mutual friends out the kibosh on him.
I'm sick of it. I've never felt unsafe meeting people in public, I figured public places were enough protection until this month.
I don't know what I'm doing differently to suddenly be preyed on by a bunch of creeps. I think I'm acting like I always have, but I have gained weight and maybe that's why? But why only now and not in January? Is it all coincidental?

If you're curious about my thoughts on previous Yakuza games, here are my much shorter (except for 4, thats pretty long too) reviews for Kiwami 1, Kiwami 2, Yakuza 3 (Remastered), and Yakuza 4 (Remastered).
All of my reviews are made pretty quickly after I finish the game, this was written right after I finished but I haven't posted it till a month later because its so long I thought no one would ever read this but whatever I gotta get my truth out there.
Per usual I played the remaster of Yakuza 5. I'm not sure of any outstanding changes or things of note like with 3 or 4, but if something I say is exclusive to the remaster please let me know! I may sound overly praising or overly critical of this game, who knows but please be kind when you tell me i'm an idiot for feeling the way I do! Lastly and most importantly please please please don't spoil future games in the comments! Also warning I'm way too active in the comments section.
Because I am an utter psycho and decided to write a fuckin bibles worth of yakuza 5 ramblings, Part 1 is just reviewing the plot and Part 2 goes over everything else. I split this up last second so there's likely some spots where I say something like "we'll expand on this later" then I never bring it up again, that's because it's probably in part 2. If you want my thoughts on things like the substories, side stories, gameplay, and settings you can read Part 2 here: https://www.reddit.com/yakuzagames/comments/1cvrybw/yakuza_5_a_mega_big_ole_reviewsummary_for_a_big/
The Plot:
Like with Y4, I will discuss my thoughts on each section of the game rather than in one long chunk just because I find it more fun. I'm not even gonna try to not summarize this time because this game is so big it needs broken down.
Part 1: Kiryu
You might often find me compare Y5 to Y4 a lot in this review because they're honestly quite similar games and feel like a package. When I started playing 4 I was worried I wouldn't like playing as primarily strangers for a majority of the game, but one thing they did absolutely right was making Kiryu the final protagonist you play as in that game. So going into 5 I was very apprehensive about starting off with Kiryu, I worried they showed their hand too soon and that it would be difficult to stay invested the whole time.
With this feeling going into the game, I was immediately somewhat losing it over Kiryu being an incognito taxi driver with the worst disguise of all time (some sunglasses and a face mask, don't worry he's literally the only one in the game that seems to think it's a good disguise). Right off the bat, this game feels...sad. Kiryu watching Haruka giving an interview on the TV and storming out rather then defend her to some losers who don't get what ART is, was SAD. This part of the game felt so mundane for awhile, but not in a bad way! You wakeup as Kiryu, walk to work, drive your taxi, and go home late at night (usually) alone. The whole time my eyes were drawn to a facedown picture frame and wondering what it could be, but I certainly had a guess. Kiryu is going through a hard, isolating, and depressing time and you can feel that so well from the game and how they have you play as him. Anyways there's also a random gal named Mayumi that will not leave Kiryu alone despite him asking her to. All you're doing by the end of chapter one is going "Huhhhhhhh?" Anyways Kiryu is approached by two dudes named Morinaga and Aizawa in chapter 2, telling him Daigo was???? Kidnapped?? GASP.. Admittidly I wasn't too fond of this duo at first. One thing that was consistent through my playthrough is that I was completely incapable of predicting anything correctly, and it had felt like these two were gonna be my pals for the rest of the game and I just wasn't clicking with them. Not to mention this weird semi-one sided-romance going on with Mayumi.
In chapter 3, we begin with the most heartbreaking thing that could ever happen to me, Yakuza 3 superfan. Kiryu has been pushed out of running the orphanage by a lady named Miss Park. It's all making sense now. He does it so the orphanage can have money and so Haruka can follow her dreams. DOESNT MAKE IT EASIER TO DEAL WITH FOR ME :( . Then we meet Watase, first thoughts? I was like "god I hope this guy isn't the main villain he's kinda lame" Soon after we meet Aoyama and I thought literally the same thing. Clearly by this point in the game I didn't have the highest hopes. I was mostly sad and not liking most of the new characters. But then... things take a turn.
Mayumi was actually a spy! thank god honestly. Kiryu meets Aoyama again but then Morinaga shows up and fuckin kills Aoyama and says he buried Aizawa alive HOLY SHIT? and then soon after I'm told Majima is fucking dead. Figured he wasn't actually dead cuz I've seen pictures of him from later games but holy shit I somehow cried just at the THOUGHT of him being dead. Also at some point here we met a detective who is an important player in this story but at this point not too integral. Also before Kiryu leaves he picks up the picture frame and its the orphanage ;-;
Kiryu final thoughts: This part of the game was fantastic. I'm so glad they started with Kiryu in this case despite my initial unsureness with it. Chapter 4 especially is when everything really falls into place and starts going 100 miles an hour but I also love the slowness of the previous 3 chapters. I do wish we got more Morinaga as this is unfortunately the last we hear of him despite this being a wonderful set up to a really interesting villain. Mayumi was a pretty shit character per seemingly always with any full grown woman in Yakuza games. While I think it's cool she was secretly a spy she was clearly an afterthought as we never hear about her again so that's cool. Basically a mixed bag of new characters overall.
Part 2: Saejima
I jokingly said to myself "Wouldn't it be funny if I had to spend half of this section breaking out of prison again. Thank god that's not the case." and continued hanging out with Majima until I was arrested for two more years of serving my sentence and OH NO IM BACK IN THE BUILDING.
Yeah I was VERY unsure about breaking out of prison again being a good call. Thankfully, and sorry to Y4, this is a much better prison sequence. Another thing I was really unsure about was BALD SAEJIMA! But actually... it kinda slays harder? In Y4 he looks like that guy from the game The Hatred (an insult) maybe it wouldn't be so bad if bro washed or brushed it but he never did and so instead bald was a slay. Anyways We're dropped in at nearly the end of Saejima's serving period with his group of friends/cellmates, newest one being some dude named Baba. We are relentlessly tortured by the scariest man I've ever seen, Viktor Zsasz-I MEAN! Kugihara. Who's honestly scarier looking then Zsasz somehow. But it is ON because Viktor Zsasz framed my bestie Baba and I will not let that slide so I beat the fuck out of him and it's revealed Zsasz was instructed to be a dick to me. By who??????????????????? Then it's double revealed to me that Majima is dead and I'm sad all over again :(
Turns out our warden is actually really chill and nice and somewhat tries to help us survive. What a breath of fresh air after Satan (Saito) from Y4. This guy is so cool infact we are encouraged to break out by him. So Baba and I do in the dead of the night and tell me why I cried over leaving my two other cellmates ;_; they were such bros. Zsasz hinders my escape and we fight, but my absolute PAL Himura fuckin shoots him it was an amazing turn of events and I cheered so loud and was devastated to leave him behind but anyways-
FUCK YEA SNOW MOBILES (they were kinda jank to control honestly but its the thought that counts). I am so glad I didn't know I was going to be fighting a bear going into this because that was easily the most camp thing ever and so hilarious. Then some old guy saves me (and later Baba) and we chill in the mountains for a little while. The mountain has a whole crazy detailed side story of it's own that I'll explain in more detail later but basically it was cool.
So then a ton of important stuff happens in Tsukimino, most notably we hang out with Baba in a bar which is great because I love Baba and him and I are super tight and he's easily the only person I could ever trust at this point without potential for betrayal! :)
Anyways me and Baba fuckin kidnap this guy because his chair is by a sewer manhole? He's gone in a flash so all I can imagine is dragging him down the hole by his ankle or something. Then we talk for awhile, Majima is mentioned woohoo, THEN HE'S sniped! The way I gasped. Longstory short :( Baba is the one who sniped him and not only that he kind of set everything up and wasn't my best pal all along :( Why Baba Why? Then Baba basically confesses his love for Saejima and can't go through with killing him, AAAAAAND Im back on the Baba train. That detective I mentioned from earlier arrests Saejima but not to throw him back in jail, to assemble the Yakuza avengers.
Final Saejima thoughts: This was shockingly fantastic. I was probably least impressed with Saejima's section in Y4, so it was shocking to have basically the same structure and general narrative beats but done well. It wasn't perfect, I didn't love it as much as Kiryu's section as I'm partial to a slow burn, but it was fun I have no real complaints, except MAYBE more then one chapter in Tsukimino would be a better choice.
Part 3 (first half): Haruka
I did not know I was going to get the HONOR of playing Haruka going into this game. We start off very strong, dancing to the greatest song of all time "So Much More." I mean we really get the full idol experience here with mean ass teachers and shady management. I didn't expect to get an Idol simulator in my Yakuza game but it might be the best thing ever. I decided right off the bat to put everything I had into this section of the game so immediately I did literally everything I could. Most of this chapter feels like a bit of a reflection of Kiryu's were working and going back home alone, it's all as monotonous and isolating as can be (except you're a predebut idol) and I love this. We quickly meet a girl who will serve as my bestie named Akari and yes I indeed would die for her thank you. Meeting Akari introduces us to this sections version of combat, DANCE BATTLES! I know some people might be disappointed you don't get to punch people as Haruka, and I get that, but this feels like a more genuine gameplay style for her character. It's hard to imagine Haruka fighting thugs in the street due to her personality (not that i'd be against it, especially after that weird virtual reality game where I get to wack dudes with a wand) plus I found this gameplay style so refreshing. I was never groaning or sighing because I had to dance against someone. I think it helps that I wasn't forced to do it 15 times in a row walking down the street, but I had the option to most of the time unless it was part of a quest. Maybe that's how all the gameplay should be? I don't mind being approached by thugs sometimes but it always feels like it happens too often in these games and with getting the option to while getting to walk around carefree otherwise in Haruka's section was just SO NICE.
Anyways, We get the whole set up here, we are participating in a competition show that will single handedly set the course for our debut. We're competing against this band called T-set. I hate them so much. They're so mean :(. At some point we see Miss Park absolutely SLAY and tell off Haruka's dance teacher and she doesn't take his shit at all. At this point I was like "Uh ohhhh I don't wanna like her but...she kinda rocks" my decent into stanning Miss Park only continues from there. We have to go convince some guy named Christina (interesting name to take but also a slay, much respect to Mr. Christina and his fedora) to be our new dance instructor. This causes drama with me and Akari which devastated me because I love Akari but we made up like immediately so it's chill.
Then at one point, I forgot the context, Haruka is shopping for a gift for Miss Park when stupid T-set shows up and STEPS ON THE BROACH I BOUGHT FOR HER. I was back and forth on them until now, now they may burn in hell. Especially after they made Haruka get on her knees and beg for forgiveness like ???? what gives ??? Park shows up and SLAYS and gets rid of them. Park then wears the broach :(((((((((
Then one of my favorite parts happen in chapter 2, Haruka and Miss Park go hit the town and just bond together. It's so stinking cute I wanted to cry. This whole time I was trying to not get emotionally attached to Park because it really felt like she was gonna end up betraying us. But the night continued and we get some mother daughter vibes going, even so far as holding hands????? Also Im somewhat glad I didn't get to wear the outfit I bought at the store with Park because I was going for a Cheetah girls inspired look then realized far too late how tacky that might come off, not everyone is Raven Symone ya know?
Anyways at this point I'm like wow this is the cutest game ever, nothing can ever go wrong, Park MIGHT betray me but I don't even care. She gives us a cool pen and a tragic anime backstory with an abusive ex husband and everything and we call it a night Well the next fuckin day my world crumbles because PARK IS DEAD! She "committed suicide" as if!
Part 3 (second half): Akiyama
I can't tell you how devastated I was to realize I'd only get to play as Akiyama for half of a section of the game. However, I was also thrilled to see him at all. Apparently he's opening a Satenbori office and also he is the one who financed Park's dream to debut Haruka so that's how he has a hand in all this. There is tragically very little Hana, she calls you twice and both times were fantastic but I wish I had more :(. Anyways Akiyama has heard about Park's death and goes to the office and meets Haruka. I didn't think they'd even really know each other and assumed we'd have an interesting reveal that they both know Kiryu later but nah they know each other. It honestly probably works better this way because we don't have time for such trivial things! Akiyama is a fuckin detective now. I don't know why he has been tasked to do this but he does it so well I don't even mind. He quickly figures out Park didn't actually kill herself and they simply need evidence to prove this. I'm unsure when this happens but at some point while talking about the mystery SOMEONE FALLS OFF THE ROOF! It was Horie :( who I haven't mentioned yet but he's my manager and a real pal. Thankfully he lived but we found out that the former dance teacher pushed him off. I think he also killed Park or Kanai did, who knows, either way someone did and they suck for it.
Chapter 4 has a lot going on, but basically the president of Osaka talent is sus and he's also the secret chairman of Ousaka Enterprises, which is a different thing... but sounds similar. Ousaka is basically a higher up family in the Omi alliance, so he's part of the bad yakuza!!! Haruka keeps doing the competition and T-set keeps sucking. She wins the princess league by a landslide. I don't even see the point in a third round if she won both of the other rounds? Is the third round just worth more points? Either way Haruka destroyed them and they suck. Her poor vocal instructor is working as her manager now. At some point we find out Parks ex husband was none other then Majima! Which is quite the revelation. Japan is such a small world, everyone seems to know each other. This does mean that Majima at least hit Park (I think after her abortion) and I think he's like 10 years older then her yet they were already married when she debuted at eighteen... Is it time for me to confront the possibility that my favorite crazed murderer might not be the most upstanding citizen?
It ends with Haruka being kidnapped, (nothing out of character there), and Akiyama saving her. He and Haruka make their way to Japan for the big ole concert Park had been planning. Wow this story is really picking up! I hope nothing grinds it to a sudden stop!
Part 3 final thoughts: God this was amazing, every step of it. My only complaint is I wanted more, more Akiyama and MORE dancing but I might be the only one who wanted 40 more hours of dancing. Detective Akiyama and Haruka duo was not the team I knew I needed but Im glad it happened. I found all of the music and gameplay here SO fun and I loved the plot too. I really liked Parks character. I wouldn't necessarily hang out with her, but I found her to be pretty well written and its hard to hate anyone Haruka clearly treasures, I am very sad she is actually dead because up until the end of the game I kept thinking she was going to come back.
Part 4: Shinada:
We have come to a sudden stop. We start with a flashback to 1997 where Shinada has debuted as a baseball player for the wyverns, don't forget this moment because the rest of this section of the game constantly calls back to it. In the modern day Shinada is a loser who is really heavily indebt and lives in a weird grimey rooftop shack. He also now writes like ? smut articles ? And he's friend with a girl named Milky which is the craziest name I've ever heard. A loanshark who talks about his kids a lot constantly follows Shinada around and takes his money. There was a lot of promise with this gag, like maybe instead of letting me keep the 100k and still acting like I'm broke he shows up after every side mission to rob me but nope. At the end of the chapter we run into a masked man who is frankly just Daigo stealing Kiryu's disguise idea.
Shinada and loanshark (his name is Takasugi) walk around town looking for leads on uncovering the truth of Shinada's past. Because you see, Shinada one time got fired from baseball cuz everyone thought he cheated, oh you already knew that? yeah same but don't worry you'll hear it at least 40 more times. Daigo asked him to go look for clues about this, why does he care? I still don't know honestly. Takasugi is forcing him to go because...I guess money? and he's walking around with me and were acting like friends now for some reason. Shinada is incapable of having any agency for himself, he just does what people tell him to. He also keeps nearly dying like a looney tunes character with shit falling out of the sky and stuff. Eventually we find out the Nagoya family fixed the match and then some guy Shinada used to know does get smashed like a looney tunes character. Skip ahead, were called to help by Milky and she betrayed us. I am sad cuz I thought Milky was a friend for life. Turns out literally everyone Shinada knows aside from the fkn loanshark are evil, even the old baseball lady. This plot was so convoluted I frankly don't understand why they were doing what they were doing, all I know is they were more like a neighborhood watch situation then Yakuza even though they seemed to do the exact same thing. Also when I say literally everyone he knows is evil I mean everyone, even his old coach or whatever. For way too long I thought they meant the middle school baseball coach so I was hella confused. Anyways we then find out that actually Takasugi is Shinada's number one baseball fan. Okay? Anyways
Chapter 4 things finally pick up a little. Daigo reveals himself like anyone ever was doubting it was him, and he also reveals he cares because he went to highschool with Shinada. Is that fr how were connecting this? Daigo got expelled from highschool because he protected Shinada from a rival school. Once again, okay? I guess Shinada doesn't like that Daigo is a yakuza and punches him out the door. I wasn't a fan of this. Daigo goes down pretty easily, pitiful Daigo strikes again. I love him but can he do anything right? Anyways I guess the fight meant nothing cuz they're pals now and go to Tokyo together. We get a cut to Takasugi getting his money back from Shinada as well as a signed baseball...okay that's really cute I nearly cried. I wish they actually left it there but instead Shinada runs away last minute to meet up on that stupid baseball field from 1997 that we cant go 5 minutes without hearing about and we fight this guy named Sawada who was like the kind of mastermind and also the pitcher. Had Sawada not thrown an easy pitch, Shinada wouldn't have hit it and thus been kicked out for cheating. We fight some Omi then play baseball and OMG WHY ARE WE DOING THISSSSSS
Finally it ends and we go to Tokyo
Shinada final thoughts: If you cant tell I was not a fan of this. I found Shinada to be really inconsitently written. In side missions or when he's playing off of certain characters he's quite entertaining and un, but most of the time, he seems to just be a blank slate who does whatever and only talks about baseball. And omg maybe if I liked baseball this would have been the best thing ever but we did not need THAT much baseball talk or constant referencing to that baseball game in 1997. I get its central to his character but it became a meme how often he'd get misty eyed and talk about getting kicked out. Why did he move Nagoya to escape his image as a cheating baseball player when 1) he constantly talks about it anyways, 2) everyone literally knows who he is here anyways. They make it seem like at first he wants nothing to do with baseball anymore but he also goes to the batting cages all the time and also thinks about nothing but baseball. The plot here is just SO hard to follow and not at all what I want to be dealing with after we were really in the thick of things with part 3's ending. I'm not saying it was impossible for this to be good, I think there was so much potential here! Like seemingly all of Yakuza 4, the concepts are there but the execution is iffy. I think it's biggest downfall is when it happens. It would have made so much more sense to make the last section before the finale the Haruka section. Shinada would have felt much better to play as maybe as a part two or even a part three, but NOT part four. The odds were stacked against him being amongst a cast of characters that I already know and love. I definitely was more of a Tanimura fan, but I liked Shinada as a person. His inconsistent writing, unfortunate story, and tendency to be a little annoying really dragged this part of the game down for me.
Part 5: The Finale
This finale is crazyyyyyyy so strap in. I would expect nothing less then insanity from this game. First Kiryu shows up in Kamurocho WERE HOME BABYYYYYY. Were being followed by BABA!! I missed him. We fight for fun or something then we cut to Saejima who is meeting with the detective who tells us we gotta find Morinaga. OH YEAH THAT GUY. So we go to the Florist and we go to the arena only to find... AIZAWA??? The fuck? I thought Morinaga fuckin killed him cold blooded and made me think he was a cool as fuck villain. Only to find out that GASP Morinaga is actually dead. At this point I literally don't believe it because I guess I was in my era of not believing anyone ever dies.
We go to Akiyama who is told by Osaka ceo to not let Haruka perform. Akiayam says hell no. We also find out that Park and him planned to make Haruka and T-set a group and debut them at the same time but I somehow missed this when playing and didnt realize that till way leter. ANYWAY At some point we also see the CEO doing naked push ups in his penthouse which was so weird. ALSO there is a Date-san reveal. The scream I screamt! I didn't know I missed him or needing him so much in a game till I saw him again. Usually I'm wondering why he's even there or what he adds but I finally get it now, he adds being Date to the table and that's all you need.
Then I do a tower sweep at Kamurocho hills and OMG is this what Majima was building the whole time? To be fully honest it's beautiful and im very proud but its so different and lowkey off-putting. Kind of like Majima himself. I miss him. A whole game and I only be hearing about him second hand its not fair. Question, did literally anyone choose Saejima to do the tower sweep? Anyway were on the top of the tower; Kiryu, Saejima, CEO Katsuya, and Watase. We all have to fight eachother to draw out the one true bad guy and also cuz this is a yakuza game, so off our shirts go and everyone fights. Basically everyone gets shot and the bad guy is revealed... THE DETECTIVE. Who saw it coming? I still kept thinking Park would come back or Morinaga but by this point I was definitely suspecting him too. I don't fully get why he's doing all this but long story short he's purging both the Omi and Tojo of nice? Yakuza? I guess? I think it mostly has to do with him making way for his son to inherit a role in everything but thats not further explored till later. Not to worry tho! Daigo has shown up!!!! But because he is Daigo you should definitely be worried because once again he cant do anything right and he gets shot by Kanai. God dammit Daigo. He is now in critical condition, this is the SECOND TIME THIS HAS HAPPENED DAIGO. He's such a damsel in distress, never change.
Baba tells Haruka the message Kiryu had for her, to never give up. He also asks her to come with him to convince to Kiryu to chillax but she refuses. Sad for no one but me. At the New Serena, where that absolute BOP of a song is blaring, Kiryu is sleeping, while the rest of the crew are chilling and chatting. I forgot to mention Akiyama and Shinada briefly teamed up but frankly who cares. Shinada talks about baseball alot here too just incase you were worried he wouldnt. They conclude that detective bad guy is gonna attack Haruka's concert which I will NEVER allow. I guess Shinada's purpose here is actually tha the knows the stadiuk layout pretty well which I will buy in to. Also I believe here Haruka gets told about her and t-set being a band together now called Dreamline. I also dont love this. The idea of it is fine, Im all for a disney channel original movie plot where the bullies are actually great and we all become friends at the end but the issue is they don't properly develop T-set to do that. The short haired girl gets one little moment of being somewhat nice to Haruka then the very next time I see her she's stepping on my boss's broach and making me beg on my knees like sorry but it's really hard to come around on liking them. Even now when Haruka stumbles duing practice they're rude! This is a tragic ending if anything but Haruka seems happy I guess... Dont worry they will be nothing more then Haruka's glorifed backup dancers.
Okay final chapter, and it's a doozy. We send Shinada of all people to go help Haruka at the stadium, I know i just said I get he knows the layout of the stadium but like :( he's literally the only one who hasn't met her. I guess they don't end up interacting really anyways. Saejima is going to go after Majima because btw he's alive and at the top of the millenium tower. Akiyama and Kiryu stay on the ground to defend against attackers and they probably punch/ kick at least 10000 men. All the while Haruka gives her concert. But Baba is lurking and gonna shoot her, I thought he learned to be good again but whatever. Him and Shinada end up having a confrontation that ends in Baba losing and he's about to kill himself when !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my prison besties and the wardon show and up stop him! Oh my god I loved that so much what a nice resolution for Baba and I love that those guys went straight to a Jpop concert just for their pal. Meanwhile Saejima confronts Detective evil man on top of the millenium tower and !!! there he is, finally Majima is here. But he is not having a good time, turns out he's allowed himself to be captured and tortured for the sake of Haruka and now Majima and Saejima have to fight for the same reason. Then! Daigo shows up, while im literally begging him to actually shoot the bad guy but instead they all talk. Haruka is safe from harm (Baba wouldn't have done that shit anyways) and we officially learn about the plot of him attempting to put his son in charge of everything. Kiryu goes to Tojo headquarters to stop whoever this suspicious son is and Akiyama fights Kanai. Then literally all our friends ever show up to help and that was damn cute.
Kiryu shows up and it's eerie, completely silent with dead people everywhere. We go to the meeting room and the guy behind it all along was Aizawa. I definitely did not see that coming because I forgot he existed. But I suppose thats the point, he was so unassuming. I guess that means Morinaga actually was dead all along. We fight Aizawa while Haruka sings a song that seems very pointed at Kiryu wins (duh) but he is not doing well and tries to make his way through the streets. Meanwhile Haruka announces her retirement because she cant hide who she is or stay away from her family any longer and runs away to find Kiryu and THE GAME ENDS. Other games gave me a after credits scene that somewhat eased my concerns, but 5 is a overall very sad game and it's scene is her managing to him but he's bleeding out in the streets and falls unconcious in her arms.
Finale final thoughts: This was quite the finale! It was much better then Shinada's section but it was still a bit messy and left a lot of plot threads up in the air or had some unfortunate revelations. Nothing bad but things I think shouldve maybe been revealed earlier, like Aizawa. Only finding out with like 20 minutes of the game to go makes it feel too empty or even rushed when we know this game is otherwise not rushed at all. I was a little sad about the ending, I don't think it was bad at all I was just sad. The whole time I imagined it ending with the whole gang going to Haruka's concert and having a good time. For once I dont think the game fully dropped the ball on the finale like they tend to do so I commend it for that.
TLDOverall plot final thoughts: As a whole this is one of the most well written Yakuza stories since Yakuza 3 (obviously in my opinion). I can see that for some people all the plot twists and surprises might have felt like too much but I loved it, I never once could predict where this game was going. Morinaga dying off screen was such a let down and missed opportunity, at the end of Kiryu's section I was thinking he was going to be the best Yakuza villain in awhile but instead he went out in such a lame way. I do kinda wonder who killed him, I assumed it was just the detective guy but Aizawa seemed at least somewhat sad about Morinaga's death. I wonder if that was all a show? Another thing I dislike not just because of how it went, but also that it ended up going no where, Mayumi. They made quite the big deal about her at first and I do like the plot twist that she was a spy, but she wasn't even really acting any different when she was in spy mode and in normal mode. Plus you literally never see her again. I think Saejima's section was just very reminicent of his in 4, but done well. Aside from it taking quite so long to get to the city, by the time you leave it feels slightly rushed. I think the chapter in the woods didnt need to be its own thing. Absolutely no notes with Haruka, only that I'm sad this is all we will see of Park, I found her to be a really interesting character. Akiyama is where my main issues arise, only because I really do think he needed his whole section. He felt a little tacked on otherwise when I think he really didn't need to feel that way. I had hoped he would be part of half of Haruka's section then half of Shinada's where he is used to introduce us to Shinada as a character. But instead we get dropped into that like nothing. I know im probably the only one who cares about Hana this much but I really wish we got more of her. I basically said all my issues with Shinada at the end of his section but once again, I really didn't enjoy that plot. The finale was a mess and unfortunatly left at quite a cliff hanger which I wouldve rather it didn't but Im also okay with how it did. Some other things I wanted in this game was MORE MAJIMA I get why he wasnt for narrative purposes but Im gonna say that in every game. I wouldve loved more Okinawa orphan content. That being said there is way more content for them in this then in Y4 which is wild considering we spent like 5 seconds in Okinawa during a flashback and you never actually see them. It was so nice to hear what theyre up to second hand and some of the side missions expand on them a little more but I am devastated they werent there.
Lastly to briefly compare it to Y4, as they do feel like connected games. Y5 realy does feel like they took all of the concepts of the 4th game that needed to be reworked, and then re-did them to be better. The villains are better, prison break outs are better, and just like way more. I do think there are things in Y5 that are lacking compared to Y4, like general atmosphere, and I do think Tanimura's section in 4, as flawed as it is, is better then Shinadas. Akiyama's in 5 is great, but I love his in Y4 more simply because he doesn't have to share the spotlight. But I really have to emphasize, story and character are done better in Y5, ATMOSPHERE is done so much better in Y5.
TLDR for the TLDR: I liked this game :)
And there you have it, the longest goddamn review of all time. It was a really great game and I wish I could play it for the first time again because it was just SUCH a great experience. If you read this far I am so impressed by you and eternally grateful you even cared to. Please let me know your thoughts! I'm so excited to talk about this game with people. As for my rating, It was going to be a 10/10 until I got to Shinada's section now I'm in between an 8 or a 9. Ill just say 8/10 to be mean.
I am already neck deep in Yakuza 0 so I'm excited to write a much shorter review for that one soon.
Thank you for reading!

Hey everyone!
Welcome to the discussion thread for Episode 2 of "The 8." Feel free to share your thoughts, theories, and reactions to this episode.
Synopsis: In Episode 2, we continue to delve into the complexities of our main characters’ lives. Realizing that an activity rewards them with time, the eight coordinate a plan. But soon, chaos erupts as their strategy doesn't last.
Discussion Points:

1. Plot Twists: That twist at the end of the episode! Did anyone see that coming?
   
2. Favorite Moments: What was your favorite scene or line from this episode?
   
3. Predictions: Any predictions for what will happen in the next episode?
   
4. Favorite Character? Who’s your favorite character?
   

Remember to use spoiler tags for major plot points:
>! This is how you write a spoiler. !<
Let's get the conversation started!

Gender
If not relevant to this subreddit, please remove :)
I am a cis woman. I can confidently say that, but I do take it with a grain of salt. Because I have not always been so sure about my gender identity as I am now. I used to question my gender. Hard.
There was a period while I was questioning where, within all my questions about gender and identity and self, the worst possible outcome seemed to be cis. Back then, transness was even less accepted in society, and many online trans communities turned to exclusion of non-binary and/or genderfluid people, or generally anyone that wasn’t as clearly transgender as they felt themselves, in an effort to validate their own identity before themselves and society.
(“That isn’t real transness, we don’t claim them, they are crazy, we are the actual sane trans people. Ignore them, accept us.” Gay cis men did the same to trans people - especially trans women of color - following the stone wall riots. It’s a common reaction of any marginalised group that tries to be accepted in general society.)
Naturally, the last thing I wanted to do is invade safe spaces for trans people, take up space and resources that weren’t meant for me. I soothed myself, telling myself that my presence was valid in my pursuit of an answer. Now that I have my answer, I wonder if my experience with gender still has a space within the discussion around it.
I don’t know what it’s like to be trans.
I will never claim that.
I do know what its like not to identify with ones assigned gender at birth, and to wish the world saw you differently. As the other binary gender. Or maybe genderless.
Back then, I read an article where the trans author described a conversation they had with one of their friends, a transitioned trans man. They were asking their friend of their experience with gender dysphoria, to which the friend answered: They never had had any.
That was surprising, to both me and the author, because so far, transness had been defined by that very thing: gender dysphoria. The friend explained that they were fine with a female body, in and of itself. But they hated being viewed as a woman. They did not identify with what they had learned a woman to be. They identified as a man. So much so, that they were willing to change their physical appearance. Because you are what people view you as. How they treat you. And they did not want to be seen as a woman.
That resonated with me. My personal issues with my gender, as I realised, were deeply rooted in misogyny, both external and internalised.
Growing up, I was a headstrong little girl. I was loud, I fought with literal tooth and nail for what I wanted, I was the only girl in an anger management group for kids. In media, I associated myself with the archetype of the straight men. The ones with control over the situation, powerful, funny, strong, that saw things for what they are. In no way did I see myself in the oversexualized love interests, the ones who’s only value was connected to what they could be to their assigned man. Furthermore, I remember looking forward to growing up and having a hot woman by my side, like all of these main male characters did. Actually growing up and realising that I was meant to be - at best - that object of desire was sobering to say the least.
I wasn’t that.
I wasn’t helpless, stupid, weak. Actually. I was all of those things sometimes, as is human, but I was never, ever, ever, someone else’s. Someones girl. Adding onto that come all the expectations we have of womanhood and girlhood. Be it interests, characteristics, ways to behave and carry oneself. I wasn’t that. I was myself. Sometimes aligning with my assigned gender, sometimes not. But no matter what I did, how I carried myself and what I spent my time doing, I was always treated as a woman. And that, to me, was the worst thing of all. Still is. That people lay their eyes on me, understand me to be a woman, and then treat me like they believe a woman is to be treated, be that good or bad, regardless of how I actually am.
Altering one’s body does not feel like a dramatic price to pay in order to escape that.
To me, it was my lack of gender dysphoria that led me to accept myself as cis. I carefully tried to explore myself regardless of the gender that I am being perceived as. I know the world still views and treats me as female. I can handle it better now.
I talked to two non-binary friends of mine. I told them that if I woke up tomorrow and the whole world had forgotten what gender is, id be more than happy. Ecstatic. Relieved. I don’t feel defined by my womanhood.
They suggested that the way I feel on gender might mean that I am outside the gender binary as well. I told them no, that I am fine with who I am. I am at home in my body. Breasts, vulva, feminine facial features and all. My struggle with gender is purely external. It lies within the societal expectations, not within me. You see, I enjoy the performance of it. I am envious of femboys and drag queens who can wipe away womanhood with a cotton pad and take it off with their wigs and clothing. I am cis. But I don’t need gender. I wish gender was mine to dress up as, and not for other people to lay on me like a chain around my neck.
And I am certain that I am not the only one who feels that way. I came here wondering if anyone here can relate. Wondering what your gender means to you.
I am aware that the debate about what gender even is (a social construct, an identity, a performance) runs deep, though it’s never meant to discredit the experience of an individual.
I suppose I also ask if my experience and feelings are valid within this discussion, or if I am appropriating something that isn’t about me.