Dirty birthday messages for boyfriends

Please be literate, descriptive and over the age of 18. I will be writing as three seperate characters who each have their own unique personalities. Your character is a human (or perhaps a different supernatural creature) who is in charge of taking care of these three orphans who reside in a large mansion. If you have any questions or if you're interested in this plot, feel free to send me a message.
Deep within the darkened forest far away from any other civilization or people, a village full of Vampires lived in solitude. No one besides the villagers knew that this place even existed. They normally kept to themselves and it was absolutely crucial that they did not tell anyone that this placed existed. Because if they did, a large amount of humans would come and most likely end up destroying the village.
The village was very well maintained and every citizen had their own assigned duty to take care of. Even though it was still rather small, the village still had the necessary buildings to survive and thrive. They had a school, grocery store, farms and a random assortment of different buildings that included a museum, indoor pool, library and restaurants.
It had seemed like they were doing very well for themselves. However, they had one very big problem that they could not solve. Due to the severe lack of female Vampires, it was impossible to breed and continue the "Vampire legacy" of living in this village. There wasn't a single female living in the entire village, only males. Due to this severe problem, the Vampire who was in charge of the village decided to invite one single human female to the village and see if she would be able to get along with the other Vampires within the village. The whole point of this was to see if Humans and Vampires could get along in the first place. It was something that the whole village agreed on, considering that their race would eventually die out if they continued to do nothing about this problem.
The human female would be staying in the orphanage with three Vampire boys. If she was able to get along with them, surely it would be no problem to interact with the other Vampires of the village. This was a test to see if a human female was able to co-exist with another completely different species.
The orphanage was rather dark and dreary. Even though the building was rather large and had many windows, there was hardly any light shining through the windows because the curtains were almost always closed. Sunlight did not affect them at all, but obviously Vampires preferred to stay in the dark. It wasn't dusty or dirty at all, except for a few things that were left on the floor and never picked up.
The boys who occupied the Orphanage were named Drax, Athan and Cain. Drax was always the trouble maker who thoroughly enjoys teasing people and occasionally playing pranks. He was also mischievous and the oldest out of the three of them. Athan was straightforward and was basically the one always making sure Drax would not get into trouble. He is very responsible and makes sure everyone is taken care of. Cain was shy and hardly talked to anyone besides Drax and Athan. He normally kept to himself and it was difficult for him to open up to new people. None of them have even met a female before, let alone seen one.
High above on the second floor, Drax leaned against the railing with his elbows perched against the top of it. His bright pink eyes scanned down at the floor below, watching Cain draw a picture with a piece of paper and a wide variety of different pencil crayons. He leaned his face against the palm of his hand in boredom. "When is that new person supposed to be arriving? I'm getting tired of waiting." Athan who was also on the second floor adjusting a few pieces of furniture replied back to him. "I think she will be here in a few minutes. I'm very curious to find out what she looks like. I guess she will look a lot more different than a male, right?" Draw replied back. "I guess so. Hopefully she is pretty. If she is, she can sleep in my bed." He said, grinning evilly.
Athan rolled his eyes. "I doubt she would do that in the first place. Anyway, I'm sure it will be fun showing her around the village and visiting all the fun spots."
Cain continued to quietly draw his picture which consisted of a mansion with a bunch of bats surrounding it.

My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year, and have been living together for six months. Our relationship has been very committed, serious, and happy, but we do have differences in personality and sometimes they clash. Last night, we got into a fight. It was nothing major and no words that couldn't be taken back were exchanged, but I got frustrated enough that I yelled at my boyfriend. I very rarely yell for any reason, and could feel myself boiling over into frustration. My boyfriend as well seemed upset and began to ignore my attempts to talk it out which made me even angrier, so in order to get some space from him I messaged a friend (m23), N, to ask if he would drive me down the street for a bit in exchange for some late night munchies.
I have known N for almost three years and he is one of few friends I've been able to make as an adult. He is also dating my best friend of almost five years (m22), H. I originally messaged H with this same request, but H was feeling very sick. N is a chronic night owl and lives less than three minutes away, so he said he was up for it and arrived within ten minutes of me asking.
I was gone for no longer than twenty five minutes, and almost 80% of that time I spent talking to my boyfriend over text. Sometimes when we argue, we get to the issue better over writing, because we aren't trying to talk over each other and we can think out our words better. The only thing N and I did was drive down the street (about three blocks), get fast food from the drive through (I got my boyfriend a burger for lunch tomorrow), N got gas at the nextdoor gas station, and then I was driven back.
I asked my boyfriend if he had anything else he felt like he needed to talk to me about since we had both calmed down, and he said no, and that he had already gotten over it. We hugged and kissed and spent the next two hours eating dinner and laughing over youtube.
When it came time for bed, I had just thrown up (I have Crohns, it happens a lot), and was very exhausted. I was just dozing off when my boyfriend asked, "So, what did you tell N to get him to rush over here so quickly?"
I told N that my boyfriend and I had gotten into an argument, but that we would be fine, and we just needed to air out the apartment of bad vibes. I tried to tell this to my boyfriend, but he immediately cut me off angrily and said "Oh, I see" right after I finished "argument."
I tried to continue explaining that I didn't say anything bad about him to N, only for my boyfriend to ask why I had to run away with a male friend after an argument, and then asked if I had "sucked his dick too" while I was gone.
I am gay, but my boyfriend is pan, and has friends of all genders. I was shocked at him saying this, and asked why he would accuse me of cheating on him. He avoided this question and kept asking why I made such a huge deal of our fight earlier that I needed to run away. I tried to explain that I wanted to clear my head so I could approach the issue productively, but by this point I was in tears over him accusing me of cheating. He then asked why it made me so upset if I didn't do anything, and I said it was because I felt incredibly shocked and disrespected.
I ended up crying so much that my boyfriend got angry with me again, and we got into another verbal altercation. He tried to claim that he was just joking with the dick sucking comment, but when I asked if me going with a female friend would have been different, he said yes. I pointed out that he hangs out with both male and female friends all the time alone for long stretches of time, but I had never felt like he was cheating on me with any of them. I also said he could read all the messages between me and N if he still didn't trust me. This seemed to finally get to him, and he hugged me and ushered me back to bed. I cried, and told him I would never cheat on him, and he said he knew that, and we went to sleep.
It has been hours since then and I have barely gotten a wink of sleep. It feels like my heart has broken. This man is truly the love of my life as corny as it sounds. Our lives are interlinked, and we have already talked about marriage and how we want to spend the rest of our lives together.
I think part of why it hurts so bad is because his closest friend is his ex girlfriend, who is also his ex fiance. They dated for five years and I support their friendship because she was a major part of his life. He frequently brings her food and lets her borrow his playstation, but I have never once thought that he would cheat on me with her. Now that he's accused me of this, though, I don't know what to think.
I would like to know what my next step should be in approaching this situation, that helps both myself and my boyfriend move past this.
TL:DR; After a fight, I took a short drive with a male friend to clear my head. My boyfriend accused me of cheating on him with this friend, and now it feels like my heart has broken, and I don't know what the next step to take is.

I came to the US two years ago as a Masters student, I work now. Back when I was preparing for US, my father never supported me. He has always been distant and has zero clue how to talk to me. Never even tries. He wanted me to get arranged married to a rich man because I was 25. I fought hard for months and he finally said yes for the US. I knew he won’t give me money for tuition so I got a student loan and started my course. I graduated magna cum laude but finding a job was tough. He would send me money for my expenses but I had to remind him every, single month. Cut to 2 months ago, I faced a minor employment evidence request from the US immigration department. All my status is clean, I just wanted to make sure I’m responding correctly, so my boyfriend and I decided to hire a lawyer. The lawyer cost $3500. I called up my ndad and explained the whole case to him. He agreed that going via lawyer was the safest thing and we had a long discussion about it. In the end of our call, I asked him if he would help me with half the amount. And oh my goodness, his face changed completely. He said he was too sleepy and that he will let me know tomorrow. The next day, he flipped over and had a long talk about the negatives of hiring a lawyer and that I should prepare for the worst. (The worst being: Me going back to my country leaving my amazing job, friends behind and starting there from scratch. My bf will have to uproot his life and come with me too because he wants to, along with our 11 year old cat.) My ndad asks us to uproot my life and leave everything behind because he does not want to give me $1750. He then calls up my younger sister (who is close to him), and tells her about his messed up finances. She delivers the message to me suggesting that I should me more empathetic towards our dad’s situation. Oh btw, he had just come back from a foreign trip with my mom, and is planning for another one as I type this. He then asks my nmom to call my bf. Both of them ask my bf not to give me any money for the lawyer as well! My bf knows this toxic pattern in my house so he told me everything the same day. I decided to cut all emotional ties with my parents that day. I managed the money somehow and hired the lawyer, but did not tell them.
I give them no access to me anymore.

Hi everyone,
I'm a 22-year-old male who recently went through a breakup with my girlfriend of 3 years. She’s a year younger than me, and we graduated together. We broke up two months ago, and I’m feeling really conflicted about it.
Our relationship had become toxic, with frequent fights and both of us struggling with our own issues. I felt that we needed to address our personal problems separately. We were planning to study abroad and live together, with dreams of getting married and starting a family abroad. However, I worried that if we didn’t break up then, we’d end up trapped in an unhealthy relationship.
For the past two months, I’ve been seeing a psychologist weekly, and it’s been incredibly helpful. I’ve realized that I might have contributed to many of the issues in our relationship. It’s hard to separate what was my fault and what she needs to work on herself.
She was a wonderful person—gentle, empathetic, and truly loving. However, I was bothered by her lack of ambition, which I didn’t find attractive. My psychologist helped me see that I probably imposed my worldview on her. I expected her to follow a similar path to mine (good grades, internships, etc.), which I now realize was wrong. My well-intentioned advice likely made her feel constantly judged, affecting her self-confidence, which later became another issue in our relationship.
Reflecting on the relationship, I’ve come to understand that I took many things for granted. I could have been a better boyfriend by showing more interest in her passions and being more romantic. I can’t stop thinking that if I hadn’t imposed my ideas of success on her and had been more supportive, she might have had more self-confidence and become more ambitious by herself.
However, she did have self-confidence issues before we met, due to a toxic family environment. When we broke up, I tried to do it respectfully, explaining my reasons and ending on good terms. I asked for no contact, which she mostly respected (except for one message wishing me good luck with something important I had to do). She asked if we could set a date to possibly try again, but I said I didn’t want to make any promises because of the uncertainty and potential for more hurt.
I’ve been wanting to reach out to her to see how she’s been, but I don’t want to hurt her again. I’m still learning a lot about myself and trying to change my utilitarian view of the world, shaped by my life experiences.
We’ll both be starting the same studies abroad in a few months, so we’ll see each other again.
I don't know if this is relevant at all, but for some context, I believe in having a deep connection before any physical relationship, so I’m not interested in dating anyone else right now.
I’m conflicted because I now see her in a new light and realize I wasn’t the best boyfriend. But I’m also unsure if this newfound perspective is genuine personal growth facilitated by my sessions with the psychologist, or if it’s just regret and idealization. Additionally, I’m afraid that if we were to try again, she may not have addressed her personal issues yet.
Has anyone been in a similar situation? How do I balance these feelings, especially considering she has her own issues to work through?
Thanks for reading, and I appreciate any advice you can offer.

Hi! I need help with an ongoing topic for me and my bf. I have gained weight after we got together 2 years ago. Now we have a very affectionate and communicative relationship, but this keeps happening over and over again so I'm getting confused.
I want to hear his opinion on the clothes I wear, I want to hear what colors and styles he likes because I want to look good for him too and not just for me. He's not very clothes interested and so I tend to ask if he like likes something or not when I'm wearing it or if I'm trying something out. In the beginning that was not a problem, I got some good information on what he likes that I can use when I'm in the mood.
Lately I've noticed 90% of what I ask him about he either think it's too "old lady" or it accentuates my belly too much ("I like this one, it doesn't bring attention to the belly as much as your other clothes do"). Granted he's made those comments maybe 3 times each in a 2 year relationship so it's not like he does it all the time.
Before his birthday party he warned me his relatives might think I am pregnant if I don't drink since I've gained weight (they're a family oriented family and his brother just had a kid).
Today when I asked his opionion on an outfit he smiled and whispered kinda quiet an affectionately and like I had a piece of grass on my shoulder or something, "you look pregnant in that". Excuse me??? I asked if him if he liked my outfit?? I said I don't think that's fair, and that I believe he thinks I look pregnant in everything because he's not used to looking at a normal overweight body and first he argued tha, then when he saw I got genuinely sad he let it go and apologised and has apologised several times today because he can see I'm still upset about it.
He is genuinely apologetic, but I still feel sad. I think I can't win and dress pretty for him because he just doesn't like my body. I'm also wondering am I imagining how bad his comments are because it's so important for me to be attractive to him? I mean no comment has sounded mean and he loves me and (tmi) loves touching my body, it's just the way it looks thing. We are afterall just constantly force fed the idea that women should be visually attractive, but that's not all or even the most important in a relationship. Should I accept that's the way it is and stop asking what he thinks? Do I need something of him to stop this from happening/affecting me? Or is there something potentally relationship-ending there (sexual/attractiveness incompatibility)?
He even sent me a text just now bc he knows I don't want to talk and apologized again and said he's going to work on how "how he thinks and expresses himself". I think that's a beutiful apology but I still feel sad. Should I accept it and move on? Am I being overdramatic at this point?
TLDR: Boyfriend thinks my clothes make me look pregnant. Accept anf move on or is there something important to see here?

Been together 9 months. Not sure the view on attachment theory here, but I strongly suspect he’s on the avoidant side and I feel this info might be relevant to what is happening now.
He got panicked and “freaked out” for a second when the relationship progressed at about 2 months in and then another time at about 4 months in; at that point, he vanished for roughly a week then reappeared saying his feelings never changed, he just panicked about his feelings. We get along very well and he has never broken things off; and I’ve given this guy more than a few gentle outs if he wanted to i.e. “just want to make sure you’re still happy”, “is this still working for you?” etc. Things have been fine the last 4 months, no pulling away.
Aside from the one week disappearing act, the most I’d expect him to go quiet for is 1 day, as I know he needs to recharge his batteries; no big deal. He likes his space and I always honor that.
But now I haven’t heard from him in 3 days. Last week, we had a really nice day together and he was slightly more vulnerable than usual about his feelings and what he sees for our future. Fantastic! Saw him/talked to him our standard amount the next few days. The last day I saw him was Tuesday and he seemed stressed. I asked him if it was just work and he said yes; I said “okay, so everything with us is fine?” He said yeah, we’re great. We both head home.
Didn’t hear from him the rest of the night, but that’s not unusual. The next day, we texted for a few minutes but then I didn’t hear from him after 4pm again. That kind of caught my eye, but just assumed he was busy. But now it’s been 3 days and hasn’t read my messages and I can see he’s online. Not wanting to panic or be a pest, I sent one “hey, hope you’re having a good day, want to meet up?” message, but that’s it. I haven’t said a word the following two days.
I’m not really sure what to do. It’s been 3 days and he’s gotta know I’m worried at this point, and he also knows I don’t blow people up and respect space and would be showing restraint in the interest of that. I don’t know if he freaked out about talking about his feelings/our future last week and is pulling back or if he’s mad at me for something or is just done with me. The latter of the two options don’t make a lot of sense to me, though, because he said we were great the last day I saw him.
So: do I text and ask what’s wrong or let him come to me?
TL;DR - boyfriend hasn’t read or replied to my messages in 3 day, didn’t have a fight or anything. Do I reach out and ask what’s wrong directly or let him come to me?

My second cousin (F, age unknown), reached out to me on social media a year ago when she learned I moved from the northern UK to London. She lives in Finland, and I have only met her two or three times. She then informed me she and her boyfriend bought tickets without confirming if the dates were okay. She was intending to stay for eleven days. I was uncomfortable with this, but I was willing to do it.
As the date of her visit approached, I was struggling with a mental health issue . I decided treatment was necessary and decided to seek help in outpatient care. I messaged her, told her I had a medical emergency and asked her to please come another time. I offered to pay for her tickets, but she declined. After her arrival date, she messaged and asked me how I was. Because I had started a day program for alcohol use disorder, I didn't see her chat until later in the day. I replied that I was doing okay, and she responded that she had a surprise and had come anyway. I explained that I was getting help for a medical condition and could not see her. I offered to pay for their hotel. She became very angry and unleashed a stream of expletives. She now says she will take me to court.
I am deeply sorry I canceled on her at the last minute, but I truly believe, had I not entered treatment, I would not have lived much longer. AITA? I'm quite overwhelmed with guilt.

My boyfriend (Luke) and I have been together for 6 months and have had many ups and downs in our relationship. His addiction to adult content and anger management being a continuous strain in our relationship.
Last week I took him with me on a night out with my work colleagues. Because he doesn’t drink anyway he offered to be the designated driver so my one colleague that usually drives us from bar to bar & home could drink. Everything was going smoothly when we all met at the first bar until it was time to go to the next bar. We walked to my boyfriends car and he got straight into the car and turned on the engine. We were all tipsy and standing outside of the car talking for 5 minutes about who was going to go first as there was 6 of us so he would have to make two trips. He was starting to get frustrated because no one was getting into the car and he was ready to go. I wanted to stay with one of my female friends (Emily) to talk to her about something in private so I wanted the other 3 people in the group to go first. However, her boyfriend (Richard) didn’t want to leave us girls on the side of the road waiting at almost 12am by ourselves. Luke then started shouting at me and my work friends telling them to hurry and get into the car and he was going to leave if people didn’t hurry up and get in. I was trying to calm him down and get him to stop shouting but he just let his anger take over and wasn’t having any of it. Emily ended up just getting into the car with the 2 other girls and going to the other bar whilst i stayed with Richard. Whilst they were in the car driving my boyfriend was rattling on about how Emily deserves better than Richard, calling him every name under the sun. They dropped the 2 girls off at the bar and came back for us. The 6 minute car ride to the bar felt like hours because of the tension in the car. When we got there I asked Emily and Richard to go inside whilst we parked and we’d meet them in there. Once they left the car I started talking to Luke telling him that he embarrassed me in-front of them and he didn’t like that and started a screaming match that ended in him saying that he shouldn’t have bothered coming so I told him to go home and I got out the car and slammed his door. I couldn’t face my friends and go into the bar so I walked home. As I was walking home he drove past me in his car and claimed that he didn’t see me. As if that wasn’t enough the night doesn’t end there. One of the girls ended up telling Richard about everything that was said in the car and he started walking to Luke’s house to fight him/ argue. It was around 1:30am at this point and i left my house to meet Emily and Richard to try and diffuse the situation. We ended up sorting everything out.
Going into work the next day was horrible because we work in an office with under 20 employees and it spread like wildfire.
This all happened the day before our 6 month anniversary and we were going to go on a date night but that never ended up happening. We didn’t speak for a few days because we were both angry at the situation and anything said would just have made things worse. So after we calmed down we spoke about everything and sorted it all out and we were fine.
Now to the actual title of this post. I was at Luke’s house and he was being very secretive with his phone. I went up to his room and there was stains all over his sheets from pleasuring himself. I took his phone and went into his garden and went through it. I know I shouldn’t have but we have had issues in the past where we’ve argued and he’s messaged other girls on Instagram, and I know about his addiction so i manly went on his Instagram and his search history. I found that the night of our fight he subscribed to 5 girls only fans pages and there was also messages in his chat from a few months ago. And proof of him purchasing videos and pictures from all these girls. I felt physically sick and almost threw up. Especially because I knew 2 of the girls who he subscribed to as they live in our area. I went back into his sitting room where he was and threw his phone at him and went back into his garden. I was shaking and was so close to throwing up, I felt so disgusted and looking at him made me sick. I asked him to drive me home and I confronted him in the car and broke up with him.
He then started bombarding me with messages and calls saying all the excuses under sun. But I never responded to any of the messages or calls until the morning after. I messaged him and we were talking about the situation and the more he was talking the more mad I was getting so I just finally said that I didn’t want to be in this relationship unless he went to therapy and started to work on his addiction and anger. I haven’t spoken much about his anger but he has thrown stuff near me in the past, went out the house and things have happened to him and he comes back and takes it out on me screaming, starting arguments. Just getting overly angry and aggressive over things that don’t need that type of reaction.
With the only fans girls I feel like it is cheating but now I don’t know whether that is even classed as that because it’s not like he physically met with the girls. However, the girls he messaged that live in our area we see them out an about as we don’t live in a big area.
I just want to get advise on whether I’m over reacting, and his actions don’t actually reflect cheating. Or if I am in the wrong for pressuring him into going to therapy for the sake of our relationship because I don’t see a future with him unless he genuinely changes. Sorry for such a long post but all opinions are welcomed, thank you for reading :).

Hi everyone, this may turn into a long post as I write this out and (admittedly) vent some frustrations I currently have (sorry in advance if that's not allowed).
To start off, between my SO and I we have 2 dogs, 3 cats, and a bunny. Someone at work stated a family member of theirs couldn't hold on to their two cats, so they were looking to re-home them, or they be sent off to the shelter by the end of last week. I felt bad, as I wouldn't want to give up my animals if I was put in the position that this person is in (basically they moved, but due to certain life events they had to move in with their parents who said no to the cats). So I offered to hold on to them so they wouldn't end up in the shelter, and they would be returned to their owner once they find a place they can stay at that will allow them to have cats.
The issue at hand is that my GF really doesn't want them here, claiming they could have some issue like a disease or something, which to q degree is understandable, but I'm keeping them separated from our other animals for the time being (even though the owner has stated they are healthy and is trying to send paperwork). She stated she also feels disrespected (more on this further down) that I would go forward with this without her approval (I did mention a few times about the cats, so it wasn't completely out of the blue). As such, she is threatening to break up with me over this if they are not removed from the home (she's also threatened throwing them outside and making them street cats, which obviously isn't good).
I'm upset that I'm trying to be a good person but am being forced to not be allowed to do so (I figured since we already have 3 cats, what's 2 more for some time, considering cats are low effort in my opinion).
Now for some juicy details that you redditors may enjoy reading. As I've stated earlier, she feels disrespected that I would move forward with this decision, without talking to her more about it. I honestly didn't think it would be a big issue since we both love animals. Growing up, whenever I visit my home country, if there was an animal that needed to take care of, I'd end up giving away a good portion of my vacation looking after said animal. And if I couldn't look after it for some time for whatever reason, a portion of my mind was constantly preoccupied wondering if they were ok. For my gf, as an example, she guilt trip me into taking in a pet rat that we we unprepared to take in (this was the only reason why I was against it, as neither of us had the money to buy a proper enclosure), as she was concerned that someone would end up buying it as snake food. This obviously made me feel bad, and we ended up getting the rat (ended up passing away, so it's currently not in the picture). She's has also stated that she wanted chickens, which I also don't mind, as roosters crowing and hens clucking remind me of my grandparents' farm. I'm hesitant on that only because I'd need to put in the time, energy, and money into making an enclosure for them (can't just have them running around in the backyard). So you can see why I thought she wouldn't mind looking after 2 cats who we are indirectly ready to take in due to having our cats. I have my suspicions thay she's jealous/insecure about it being another female's cats, as she asked a question or two about the scenario that in my opinion didn't pertain to the cats directly (more on this layer)
The issue I have with her claiming she feels disrespected is I feel like I bend over backwards for her, while also letting her walk all over me, to the point where she claimed I have/had sex with my mom (she did not say this directly to me, she stated it to certain family members who have relayed it back to me) which such a thing has never occurred. She also believes I have done something to the our animals. The first time she stated that if she found out I ever did something to the animals, she'd find someplace to go and take all the animals and I'd never find her. Another time my dog was pooping, and she asked why his rectum looked like that (again, pretty much claiming I did something to my dog). The most recent claim she's made is I went out to walk my dog, and ended up talking to one of our "neighbors" (they live behind the house that's directly across the street from us) and I admittedly stayed for a very long time. She tried calling me, but my phone was on silent for some reason, and I ended up missing her call. She sent me a few messages, the first 2 claiming she was going to call the police and file a missing person report (understandable considering how long I've been gone, and the fact it was around 11 at night), but then the following messages claimed she hopes my dog doesn't come back raped, and the message after that asked if I was "getting fucked by Dan" (I don't even a Dan where we live). She's also claimed I did something to her dog, as she thought her puppy looked prolapsed during her period. So as you can see, there's been a lot of claims by her of me supposedly sodomizing the animals which I want to make clear has not happened.
To make matters worse, and possibly the cherry on top, she claims to have taken some photos that pertain to me that she claims she will post online if we ever break up so people know the real me (I won't get into too much detail, but it is of a sexual nature that luckily doesn't have me directly in it, but nonetheless wouldn't be a good thing to be put online if she goes through with it). I haven't seen these photos directly, but I'm going to assume the worse and believe they exist. I believe this falls under the category of blackmail, bit I'm not sure, as she hasn't used it as leverage to get me to buy her things or do things for her, etc.
I'll admit that I maybe haven't been her perfect boyfriend. I did try however I could, even going above my means to try to please her, which I am am now literally paying for (something I'm currently working on). I also will admit that I have spoken about her to my family members behind her back, although they claim that I'm not speaking ill of her if what she does/says is true (they have witnessed how she is first hand, so they know I'm not talking out my ass about certain things). Am I crazy/in the wrong to think "the audacity of the bitch" when she says she feels disrespected, when she has claimed all the things above?
For some chocolate drizzle: I had a surgery a few months back that I was healing from, and I was laying in the bath tub letting the shower head hit me, just trying to relax a bit, when she comes into the bath to rinse off her dirty feet almost right above my incision (it was basically an open wound with some glue over it).
This is all excluding the constant accusations I get from her about cheating on her. She wants access to my phone (I have somehow managed to stick to my giluns and not give it to her) and I have shown her my text messages a handful of times, and she never finds anything because, well, I'm not cheating on her. I'll admit that I have some sensitive information on my phone that I don't want her to have access to the primary one being bank accounts, and I don't want her seeing my degeneracy on reddit (thank you anonymous browsing lol)
That's it for now. Again, sorry for the long post that turned into a venting/advice session. I have the right of mind to either move into an apartment by myself for some time and letting her figure out what to with her animals and try to get away from this mess. Or better yet, let her be mad over the cats, and break up with me for wanting to help someone out, and potentially take her to the cleaners legally if she goes through with posting the photos about me. I don't want to take legal action against her and potentially ruin her future, as I understand she hasn't had the best life growing up, but I'm also tired of letting her get away with whatever she wants.

After 10 years of me (F 28) begging my partner (M28) to stop soliciting sex behind my back I am finally leaving. I don’t have an ounce of trust left for him and honestly I get the worst feeling he’s been sleeping with other people behind my back. He’s become so sneaky and honestly just a liar. He lies about everything so you can’t take word for anything. I’ve finally had enough. My self esteem is in the trenches but I have to leave for my kids and my sanity. I deserve better and I realize that his behavior is not normal nor should I live an anxiety filled life constantly trying to catch him cheating. I’ve caught him on dating apps, posting naked photos, messaging other men and women, looking for escorts and even messaging them to meet up, leaving in the middle of the night and he’s lied about his location so I’m pretty sure he has met them. I usually make excuses for him, stay, and take his word about seeing therapy or whatever he feeds me but he never follows through and just keeps doing the same things. I’ve allowed him to really run me into the ground just so he could do these things. I felt at times he was just doing the bare minimum to say he was a good person against these allegations. I’ve been a wonderful mom and partner to him and his family. I did it sleep deprived, tired, hungry, spent my last dollar on him constantly going above and beyond for birthdays and holidays and constantly got bare minimum from him. I’ve allowed him to make me believe I wasn’t good enough for far too long. And I just don’t deserve how he’s done me. Someone who truly loved me wouldn’t be looking for sex outside their relationship constantly. It’s a struggle a lot to do on my income alone but I am picking up a second job to make sure I can care for kids and myself. I’m afraid how the kids will feel about us separating but it’s necessary for us to do so. I’ve strapped a metal rod to my spine and just keep repeating all the bad things to remind myself to not give in or go back on my word.
TL;DR After 10 years of my partner cheating behind my back by being on dating apps, posting naked photos, messaging people for sex men and women,lying about his location and asking to meet up with escorts I am finally leaving. And just constantly lying. I have finally realized I deserve better and cannot keep allowing him to tear my self esteem down.

So i have this friend who is dating for abt 3 months im not friends with his boyfriend but i know him, i had lunch with him a bunch of times and i cant stand the thought that i helped my friend cheat him. Thats totally against my morals and i conflicted, i know it was wrong and i feel terible but at the same time im so atracted to him and i just wanna kiss him again. It started two weeks ago when i got drunk at a friends house and end up sitting on the floor between his legs huging his waist while he played with my hair, i flirted with him and he told me i looked pretty when i was drunk, he also caressed my waist under my shirt. After that day we started hugging for longer than friends normally hug each other and spend more time with together. Whenever our friend would comment abt it we'd get mad and say something like "HE HAS A BOYFRIEND, GOD" and deny everything, even to ourselves, we'd pretend that everything was normal. But than he started putting his hand on my tigh, griping it, holding my waist etc... Yesterday we were at a friends birthday party and i talked with him for the fist time abt the fact that he has a boyfriend, i told him that it isnt fair to him what we are doing and that i feel really bad abt it, he told me that he also felt bad abt it but the way the conversation went it didnt seems like he has any intention of breaking up with him. He told me that i shoudnt feel bad, that im not foing any thing wrong, that he is the only one in the wrong in this situation, but know im wrong, i feel like the worse human being in the world. And i like him so much that when we had the chance i didnt though twice abt kissing him when we were alone at the backyard or in the bathroom. I cant talk with our friend abt it and i feel terrible, i not sure he will break up but he has told me that he doesnt see a future with him, i dont know what i should do

oh my god. so i recently moved into a house with some kids. Im almost 30, they’re 21. I met them through facebook marketplace as I was moving states.
Things started off fine for the most part. My 2nd day here one of the roommates, we’ll call her A, told me how they’ve had to forcibly remove every roommate that’s had my room and how every roommate has been incredibly toxic. Kind of a red flag but whatever. Then A wanted to be my best friend. Do everything with me. It was a lot but being in a new state I decided to entertain it. Things were okay for a bit, I spent the night at a friends house after drinking and when I came back the next day A went off on how I needed to let her know if I’m not coming home. Also kind of weird but she’s young, maybe it’s a safety thing.
Well, I ended up dating this guy and suddenly she turned evil. Holy shit. they met, got along great and idk if it was the jealously but home girl freaked out. Immediately she gave me back a ton of stuff she borrowed, took down our photos from around the house we had taken, and started blatantly ignoring me when I came home. It was so weird.
Anyway, I also live with her boyfriend, B. They began bullying me out of the house (??) sending me really aggressive messages and accusing me of things I have never done (smoking weed in the house + doing laundry at 3am). I was like that’s weird. I tried to talk to them about these things bc they never happened and they told me they weren’t interested in talking. Weird.
Anyway, I decided to move out because the vibe was weird and I found a place to move into within the month. I don’t trust them enough to give my security deposit back so I figured I would not pay rent, apply it to the last month, and get out. Well, of course - they serve me with a 3 day notice and an eviction. I’m on a month to month lease and they lied on the eviction about the term im in. They even mixed up how much i owe them throughout the document. It just looks like a toddler has done this.
So yeah, since the eviction was served on Friday they have changed the wifi, boarded up the back door (the one i leave from because of where my room is so now i can’t get out), and threw away all of my food. I’m wondering if I can take legal action? I’m leaving in about a week but this is crazy and i’m starting not to feel safe in my home. Oh and they’ve gone into my room and took my lotion (weird). it’s just like, the whole thing is so bizarre and im more confused than anything lol but yeah, fucking psychos.

So I have more evidence of the duration of contact. She's 7 months married. 6.5 months pregnant.
It started out sexual from his first words. Calling her sexy. Asking to video chat. She didn't, but deflected in a passive way. I know they transitioned to Snapchat after he asked to video chat and stopped using Instagram. ~3.5 yr gap from then to when they added each other on this latest instance of his Snapchat.
Proof I nailed it on at least two counts in our previous talk when I told her that "I don't remember" isn't the defense she thinks it is. It's just harmful stonewalling and lying and I'm going to operate under the assumption: of the possible answers, it's the worst one. Don't remember how long it has been going on for? I take that to mean it's been the whole time. It happened before our relationship and never stopped. She acknowledged that he had asked for sexual pictures. I asked when he started that. "I don't remember." Well that just means that's the status quo. You don't have an event to point to because it didn't stand out. That's just the nature of your conversation. It's always been him pushing boundaries and asking for it.
So when I ask what video she sent and she says "I don't remember?" When I ask what else she has sent and she says "nothing else inappropriate?" Well I don't have proof but I know what my gut feeling is. Let's not get into the "inappropriate" nature of the admitted venting to your ex who about our relationship problems...
Time for another confrontation with newfound evidence to poke holes. Let's see if it's enough to trigger her to come clean now on the rest.
She tries to minimize it. Reiterates that nothing else inappropriate was sent. I tell her that the whole thing is inappropriate and should have been shut down when it started in the way that it did. I asked what was exchanged on Snapchat. She said he asked for more but that she told him I'm married and don't want to do that. I pointed out that he was calling her sexy and asking to video chat and there's no hint of that sentiment in the months it took to move to Snapchat. All I see is (AP):"you're looking sexy" (WW) "thanks. you're looking good too!" and "Im 8 mo pregnant, tired, and don't want to be on camera." Nothing even vaguely expressing its inappropriate or that you want it to stop because you're married. Just quick on the draw when he asks to see that sexy belly or that cute face. Asking to video chat, a shared Snapchat username, and right on over to the platform designed for sexting. Either it's as you say, that you didn't care about him at all and just went along in the most passive way imaginable or you were an enthusiastic participant. I think it's the latter.
She deflects and brings up me texting my ex at one point with a picture of our new baby. Also mentioned a girl I have on Snapchat. Turns out she must have snooped in my phone? Well she never mentioned it to me despite "it shaking her."
Another example of a huge personality flaw of hers. No communication. She just bottled it up and used it as justification for eroding our marriage. If she had mentioned it at the time, it could have been addressed and put to rest. One benefit to living a clean life. I told her that my recollection of the nature of the conversation I had with her was that it was short, congratulating her on getting married and sharing that we had our daughter. That I haven't spoken to her since. As for the other one brought up that's a Snapchat friend, she is a childhood friend that was a few years younger and not an ex. Our parents worked together and our families hung out a lot. That she's in a happy long term committed relationship on the other side of the country and that I havent seen her since we were like 15 and 12. That we had previously talked in college and before our relationship about each others' relationships. Mainly to vent about ones that had ended or complain about the lack of options. At one point she was in one where he wasn't very committed and I told her she deserves better. I hadn't said anything during a relationship besides being happy and wishing her the same. This all being prior to our relationship. Since then it's pretty much just random pictures you send out to everyone like stuff our family is doing or of her and her SO/dog, but not engaging directly. So yeah, nice try at deflection, but these are wildly different actions.
All this gives me the idea to go see if she's got her old phone around somewhere with old messages from before we dated. I had seen the stuff mentioned in the previous post, but had drawn a line back then to not look at anything from before we dated. I feel it's relevant now for texts with AP at least, to be an example of how they interact.
Found it, and checked when she was away. Read their conversation history. Everything out of his mouth is sexual. Pushing for photos. Sending nudes. He was married at the time. She wasn't super cooperative at first, bringing up the wife, but still ended up sending nudes in response to his. About a year and a half before we got together, while she was between boyfriends, he asked to meet her at a hotel when she came back home for the holidays and she agreed. Later said she couldn't because she just started dating someone and wasn't the type of person to do stuff with two guys. Partial credit I guess? Still not a great look into the character of my wife to be comfortable as AP.
Anyway. Stashed away the evidence. I did do some internet sleuthing and found the address, phone numbers, Facebook, etc of him and his wife. More on that later.
In our conversations about him and their history together, she did mention that before we met, she was in a relationship where the guy was suspicious/jealous and was physically threatening (punched a wall next to her) and sexually assaulted her. That she had told the ex and he confronted the guy and made him back off. So there's a new aspect of trauma she hadn't shared fully. She had shared early on that she had a relationship with someone she was scared of who got jealous and started stalking her but hadn't shared the rest. She won't tell me his name which is probably good for my own continuing "not in jail" legal status, but fuck.... I can appreciate what he did for her and still think he's scum. I can understand the sense of owing him for that and wanting that as an option for protection, which lead to putting up with it despite not wanting to follow through (as she claims). That doesn't excuse continuing into marriage though. It's also fertile ground for an emotional affair if he's the confidant she talks to when things are rough. There's also the "well I've seen it already so it's not a big deal if you send more pictures" aspect that makes it easy to slip into that dynamic.
More to follow. I did however have a session with an IC thru talkspace which went well. She brought up BPD which after looking, I can't say hits on all counts but there's definitely a lot of overlap with the Petulant subtype.

Hello im Rory I thought everything was fine but then one time i saw a notif on my phone and it was tita (my bf’s mom) open kasi acc nya sa phone ko that time then i saw the message sa lockscreen ko saying some negative words at first i was like “huhh?” then theres the curious me i saw the whole convo and it was about me LOL she was jealous pala sa simple na gift sakin ng jowa ko. Note this ha… my bf never fails to spoil his family mapa wants or needs. Lol i saw the small signs from the start pero di ko inisip yun because im really starting to love them na e. I love my boyfriend so much amd im sure about him, i got no other intentions on him other than make him happy and be successful in this life with him and just grow old with this man. Then yeah yun na nga i saw some signs na i think his mom doesnt like me but i was just gaslighting myself that its fine and normal but then now ??? Even the smallest things like my boyfriend posting me in his fb story, shes jealous about it?? why ??? this hurts me so bad kasi naapektuhan kami ngayon. Even messaged him “oh bat ako di mo iniistory huhu ” GIRLLL?!!???!?????? IS THAT NORMAL???? FOR A MOM TO ACT LIKE THAT??? AM I WRONG FOR BEING HURT AND I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT I FEEL RIGHT NOW tho my bf always assured me that no matter who it is, he will not let me be disrespected and he told me na selosa na talaga mom nya but OH MY MY I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO FORGET ABOUT THIS.
NOW MY BF DOEST POST ME ANYMORE AND IT BECAME A HUGE FIGHT TODAY.I was in a bad place kasi today and ayun medyo tinoyo ako and I overthinked that maybe he jus doesnt wana show me up anymore so i opened that issue up and medj naging argument or whatever but then nadulas sya and nasabi nya na nagseselos daw pala mama nya AHAHAHAHAHA NAKNAMPUCHA ANUNG GAGAWIN KO???? LOOK I WOULD NEVER DISRESPECT MY MAN’s MOM AND FAMILY BUT I DONT KNOW HOW TO CONTAIN THIS FEEELING ANYMORE. IM HURT NA NAGUGULUHAN NA MAG DDOUBT I JUST DONT KNOWWWWW. SEND SOME ADVICE PLEASE REDDIT COMMUNITY.
DONT SA AND POST THIS KASE MAHILIG SA SOC MED SI TITA 🙃💔
Loook i stayed at their place for a month ha, cooked and cleaned for them and im not nanunumbat ang akin lang i was really genuine to them I mever faked anything. I cared. I had good shares of stories and laughs with them lalo na sa mga kapatid ng bf ko and i thought what she made me felt was real but yun pala inside she really didnt like me and it broke my heart and i dont how to recover. this hurt me in a different way yall. I POURED OUT MY LOVE OUT THERE AND GOT THIS. :(((

I 14m have a gf 14f. We have been close friends since the beginning of the year and started dating around a month ago. When we see each other at school, everything is fine and she is loving, but when I text her goodnight she may not reply until the night of the next night and it is about something else, ignoring that message. I've asked to call a lot but she says the next time she can call is this Thursday (said that a week ago). She doesn't ever text first, but she says she loves me. It may be notable to mention her past boyfriends ghosted her for months and they broke up recently before we were dating. We are both moving schools for high schools and have planned to see each other on the bus every day. I've felt incredibly lonely because she is always either busy or doesn't answer my texts for days. Whenever we do hang out in person, she is with her friends and ends up talking to them for most of the time. Over summer, we will both be gone and won't be able to see each other much. I'll make updates if anything of importance occurs. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

Me and my best friend are both 19 and 4 years ago, I ended up liking one of his ex right after they broke up. She was always very friendly with me and tried to be very close to me. I always hung up fast and pushed her away but when they broke up I ended up making moves on her without thinking, I was 15 and had no relationship experience, I realized my mistake and my friend forgave me. Told some time to build back trust and be good friend again.
Now where much closer and another situation happened. We both liked the same girl in a freshmen summer college program and i ended up pursuing her and continuing to like her while he didn’t. We were very friendly with one another and i ended off the program giving her a hug and she said she’ll miss me. I felt like there could have been more with us if i just told my shot. I ended up texting her over the rest of the summer left and I enjoyed texting her. I wanted to get on call with her but she shut that down instantly and soon after ended up ghosting me for days on her roblox and nap grind. I lost interest after that. Then when the fall semester started I went to the other campus while her and my bestfriend went to the main campus. My friend knew about everything with me and her. I told him I didn’t like her anymore and it ended up nowhere obviously. They started to get closer and hanged out a lot on campus, mainly alone. Over time they started going out and end up liking eachother. My bestfriend is very friendly and physical with girls. Always ended up a lady’s man.
I wasn’t very comfortable about it especially when being around them if I did go to the main campus but i didn’t have anything with her and things were going somewhere with them so way have a problem. I just let them be, he knew she was weird but was down to just mess around. Doing cute relationship things never hurt no one and they ended up stop talking to eachother. She later on ended off unfollowed him and blocked him.
Later on a few months she wished me a happy birthday and starts to chat with me (I told my bestfriend this). I was down to be cool and since my bestfriend is transferring next semester. Having someone to be cool with her and there would have hurt. After a week and a half of texting she invited me to go out to eat with a group. Her friend and her boyfriend and maybe another girl. I was down to go the next day and when I was on the train, my friend called to hang out and I said I was going out with her and a group. He hung up and now he’s saying it part 2 of my first mistake.
I understand i never got far with her and he did, especially with her guaranteed liking him but I wasn’t trying to make a move. Did i mess up again or are we both maybe in the wrong.
TL;DR! I was trying to be cool with my friends last talking stage who I also liked before. She invited me to eat out in a group and now I might lose my best friend.

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/TASoDHype posting in AITAH
Concluded as per OOP
1 update - Medium
Original - 16th May 2024
Update - 17th May 2024
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AITAH for leaving my fiancée after I learned there were strippers at her bachelorette party?
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What the title reads basically. I(29M) and my ex-fiancée(29F) were together for 5 years. We should have been married now in the normal conditions but I broke up with her and cancelled the wedding 2 days before it because they invited male strippers to bachelorette party. I am personally not a fan of these parties but reluctantly agreed after both groom & bride side confirmed we would keep it simple. I told my ex-fiancée I am not comfortable with strippers or other kind of crazy things. She agreed. I also told my friends if they were to do a stupid thing without me knowing, we would have problems.
We stayed at my friends' summer house and chilled there by the pool, did some wow raids and played board games. My ex-fiancée and her friends went to a restaurant then rented an airbnb. There was no problem during the night and next day I asked how things went. She and her close friends said it was really chill and good. We returned to the city centre after that.
I encountered another bridesmaid that day when I was shopping for a bracelet for my ex-fiancée for her upcoming birthday. I asked that girl how's everything as we were in the same department at the college but rarely talk now. She is closer with my fiancée than me. She said it's going good and last night was crazy with all the strippers. After saying that she looked uncomfortable. I asked her about the details but she was not willing to tell much. I think she realized she should not have talked about it. I laughed, said goodbye and left.
I confronted my fiancée and she seemed surprised about it. She was denying it first, then told me nothing crazy happened and one of the bridesmaids invited strippers. I reminded her that it was a strict boundary for me. I asked about the details but she said there was nothing much with strippers just solo dances and that's it. I told her I need some time to think.
Almost all of the bridesmaids messaged me ensuring nothing happened when I was on my way back home(definitely not coordinated). Things happened after that but in the end I decided to break up and cancel the wedding. I lost some money since it was only 2 days before the wedding. Things are not cool right now. My head is messed up, I get criticism from everyone and no idea about what to do. My sister told me to see a therapist to process my thoughts and feelings. That is what I'll do next. Some mutuals suggested me that I should reconsider things and stop being so whiny about such a small thing. I do not think it's such a small thing especially when they all tried to hide it from me.
AITAH here?
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Comments
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tasty-horse-paste
This is strangely similar to something that happened recently on 90 day fiancé.
Edit: A lot of people saying disagreements about strippers etc. is common, which sure, but it was the detail about playing MMO games by the pool at the bachelor party that got my attention. But I'm not saying OP's story is fake; it just reminded me of the 90 day thing.
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former_farmer
Because this happens a lot. Some people think that cheating in the bachelorette party is correct. It's so dumb.
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boredathome1962
NTA. "It was crazy with all the strippers" is hugely different from "it was really chill and good". This isn't just lying, this is a total reversal of the truth. Even her "it was just solo dances" is not the same as "crazy". So they are lying, all of them, except the first one.

OOP: Everyone is telling different things. One person says it was crazy, my ex says it was just solo dance, another person says it was different. I do not know whom to believe to be honest and that's one of the reasons I lost trust here. Apparently, the stripper was naked and that even alone is a dealbreaker for me. There is no way for me to know what happened that night and why she did not even bother with calling me or telling me about it.

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**Judgement - NTA*\*
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Update - 1 days later
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TL;DR: Bitter truth was revealed bit by bit. Ex-fiancée had sexual interaction with a stripper. It's therapy time.
I read most of the comments in the original post and thank you for the advice. My problem was that not her being blindsided by her friends but lying. Every bridesmaid told different things and none of them gave details about what happened. I believe you can understand it just shatters the trust and makes you think there is something going on.
I thought there was something wrong with me after reading the comments. There were a lot of YTAs and I thought I should apologize. One of the bridesmaid reached out to me last evening. I suspect she saw the post somewhere and recognized it. I knew my fiancée was having problems with her friends since last week but I did not know the extent.
Apparently, my ex-fiancée and her close friends blamed the girl that I encountered at mall about everything. This divided the group and led into a verbal fight. I will skip the personal details here but in the end she told me my ex-fiancée and other bridesmaids got sexual with the strippers. My fiancée was the only one who had boyfriend/fiancée/spouse(at least monogamously) there to my knowledge. Also, I was told by her that my ex-fiancée was not blindsided with stripper invites. She was happy to see the strippers and was relieved she had an excuse. I do not have proof for all of these but I got a short video of girls making out with strippers. One of the girls is my ex-fiancée and that's enough.
She has been trying to reach out to me since we broke up. I confronted her again. At first, she denied it again then it became we just touched, then okay we kissed too, okay I gave him a handjob, finally I was coerced into doing these by others as I pressed on. I just blocked her after the last part. I did not see any need to learn further. I was hurt already but learning that I got cheated on hurt more. I am not sure if it's the full truth even now. I will never know but all I can say is it hurts. I will go to a therapist to not carry my luggage to my next relationship. I lost 15K from the wedding related things and need to focus on filling the hole for a while.
Some misogynists made weird comments about women and I'll just ignore them. Some of the people told me I am an insecure, unfunny nerd for playing WoW on my bachelor party. Isn't the whole point of bachelor parties having "one last fun". It was raiding non-stop with the boys for me, not having one last sexual interaction with a stranger or having a stranger's butt on my face or penis. I will not miss on out these during marriage anyways(omitting the stranger part).
That's it. It's therapy time tomorrow and thank you for the help.
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Comments
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scotswaehey
I will never understand why people like your Ex Fiancée throw it all away for one night
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BigBlackBlasphemer
Not just that, the whole group had banded together in solidarity to lie.
If it wasn't for one person, they would've gotten away with it, while gaslighting OP the whole time
I hope all those votes calling OP, an AH rightly feel like DA's.
15k and a cancelled wedding is still LOADS better than divorce after the fact. You're doing the absolute right thing.
Also, I AM petty enough to blast her publicly with receipts if she wants to play the victim and make me look like the bad guy.
And the first person I'll send the video of her cheating to is her Dad. See how she likes those apples
PSA: Don't be the simp guy who didn't want to send his "wife" to jail after everyone caught her trying to poison him with bleach in the coffee machine.
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SuccessfulSeaweed385
I had a lan party at my bachelor party and it was awesome. Fuck the haters and screw your ex. NTA.
FarquaadStoleMyWig
My brothers bachelor party was pizza, flip cup, and halo reach on system linked Xbox’s. Fucken best night ever
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I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments

My (35F) best friend Emma (35F) has been with her BF Mark (38M) for about 8 months.
During their short relationship, Emma has caught Mark messaging other attractive women on Instagram asking to meet up and being flirtatious.
The final straw came around Jan where Mark was caught IG messaging a woman from the gym. Emma confronted him and he messaged the woman saying "I can't talk to you anymore because my girlfriend won't let me 🙄". Very disrespectful. Emma took a break from him.
Problem is, they were due to move in together in Jan too. So Emma was stressing about how she gave her roommate notice to allow Mark to move in and now she's not sure because he's been messaging other women but can't afford the rent on her own.
Emma finds out at the same time.. She is PREGNANT. Emma decided to forgive Mark and let him move in on the basis that he unfollows women on IG and stops messaging women unless they are a known female friend. And he promised he did not actually do anything physical cheating wise.
Cut to my dilemma : this weekend was their baby gender reveal party. My friend Emma tagged Mark in the reveal photos on IG. I have realised that Mark's IG profile was public on Friday, but had been made private as soon as the baby related tags to his profile happened.
There could be innocent reasons for this but given his history it seems sketchy to me? Maybe Mark wants to message with women on IG without them seeing his girlfriend and baby on the way?
I don't think I can bring this up to Emma with so little proof of bad behaviour and don't want to stress her out unnecessarily. But I think it's so weird to have a public profile and then make it private as soon as he is tagged in their baby scan and gender reveal photos.
What do you think? Is there anything I can do to get more solid proof he is being sneaky?
Tldr : friends boyfriend has made his Instagram account private suddenly after she tagged him in their baby scan and gender reveal photos. I think this is odd when he has a history of messaging women on IG.

I’m not sure if this can go in this community, I’ve never used it but Reddit asked me to pick one to post in, so hopefully this works out.
TLDR at the bottom
Hello, I don’t ever really post here, I mainly use it to read stories or cheer myself up a bit after a hard day. But, today is different. We live in NY, that may be important later on.
So, the other day, my boyfriend and I went out with some friends. We ate and I ended up getting food poisoning, I was supposed to go in at 11am today but unfortunately couldn’t due to my current illness that will pass. My boyfriend texted me this morning, his message stated that our boss cut back our hours from 5 days a week to 2 days (for me) and 3 days (for him). Please keep in mind that our boss is the same woman who will praise us to our faces then turn around and attempt to pin all of our co-workers against us. This is also the same woman who attempted to frame me of stealing money, which I didn’t do and she fired the one who did it, but she still insists that I cannot be trusted and that I am “lazy” and “incapable of hard work”. I work in a gas station deli, by no means is that “hard work”. I worked in two different restaurants, both were quite popular where I used to live.
Not only has my boss consistently degraded myself, my boyfriend, and the only diligent works; but she also consistently claims that she does everything. This woman comes in for 3 1/2 hours, makes some weird looking/smelling food that only two people get, makes a mess out of the entire deli and hot food sections, refuses to do her dishes, acts as though every one else is in the wrong for coming to work. She is also now attempting to get me in trouble for my physical issues (that have gone undiagnosed due to medical professional ignorance and parental neglect (father’s side)), acting as if they’re not real and treating me like I’m making it up “just so I don’t have to work”. If that was the case, I wouldn’t work there.
I started working there in late January, early February and this woman has nonstop proven that she should not be in charge. She promoted myself and my boyfriend to supervisors and gave us a raise, we haven’t gotten our raise and she likes to tell us we have no authority and that we can’t do anything. At this point, I am genuinely lost with what to do. My boyfriend and I are looking for good jobs that pay us way more, we only make minimum wage and in the economy, we can’t afford ANYTHING. I can’t even get insurance or start working towards my financial goals because of this woman.
I do not feel as though it is legal to almost completely knock someone’s schedule because they missed one day. My boyfriend hasn’t missed any days recently so his schedule being docked hours makes no sense. If mine was knocked a day or two, that would make sense to me. But taking more than half of my work week away because you have a silly vendetta that YOU concocted, that doesn’t make any sense to me. I have over 50 files collected of all that has been said and does as well as witnesses if I need them, but any regulatory advice would be HIGHLY appreciated.
TLDR: My boss is on a power trip at our convenience store and is cutting my hours because I got sick, as well as creating many issues between myself and other co-workers. What do I do?
Edit: this is the same woman who will get very angry with me or any of our co-workers for asking a question or trying to explain ourselves, she won’t even let us get a word in and just berates us for USUALLY no reason.
Edit two: I was recently informed that she (my boss) was fired from another location for doing the same thing she’s doing at our current place of work. I also got a comment about Walmart manager training, she worked at Walmart so that explains a bit for me.