Creative ideas for boyfriends birthday

So. It's my birthday today. I have never had the feeling so strong when I have woke up. I don't know what caused the switch from when I went to sleep last night(which I was in a pretty good mood). I woke up today. And feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest. I feel like someone extremely close to me died. Or something even worse. It is so strong in me that I am struggling to just have a calm thought and can not sit still and every fiber in my body that makes who I am just wants to run as far away from people , which is extremely screwing with me because family and friends are sending there birthday wish and trying to talk to me. And I'm trying to be cool and not let anyone notice that there is something bad going on. I really don't want to do this anymore. I am tired of having this empty feeling. I've delt with it forever. And have been really trying to work on it. I have a good positive family and a couple really good friends. So why is it getting worse. Why. And the last 6 months have went into a spiral. I'm falling into a deep hole. I make totally drastic decisions out of nowhere when I get like this. Please please. I have no idea how to deal with this. I never have attempted suicide. Although I've always had a lot of mental issues. I just never had the feeling like it was the solution. I don't feel that way now. Right now. In this fucking moment. I would love nothing more then to feel a purpose for my existence. Or just the feeling that someone wants you and only you. I'm 47 and I've never had that feeling in my life . I've had pletty of relationships. But always felt I was there back up plan. Does anyone know how that feels. How fucked uup of a feeling that is. I don't know how to describe it all. I am probably not making much sense so I'm done

Me (28F) wedding is scheduled for September 15th, a date that holds special significance for my fiancé (30M) and me because it's our anniversary. We've been planning this day for over a year, and everything is set in motion — venue, vendors, invitations sent, the whole nine yards.
Enter my sister (32F), who recently booked a non-refundable, two-week vacation to Italy with her boyfriend, leaving on September 10th. She claims she forgot my wedding date when booking the trip. Now, she’s demanding I move my wedding date so she can attend. She insists it’s unfair for me to expect her to cancel a trip she’s been looking forward to for months.
I suggested she could join us virtually, but she scoffed at the idea, saying it’s not the same. Our parents are pressuring me to accommodate her, arguing that family comes first and that it’s just a date. They’ve even gone as far as to say they might not attend if she can't be there, hoping that will push me to change my mind.
However, changing the date would mean losing our deposits and re-planning everything, which would be both stressful and expensive. My fiancé and I are firm about keeping our original date, but now my family is accusing me of being inflexible and selfish.
So, Reddit, AITA for refusing to change my wedding date for my sister’s vacation?

So I have more evidence of the duration of contact. She's 7 months married. 6.5 months pregnant. It started out sexual from his first words. Calling her sexy. Asking to video chat. She didn't, but deflected in a passive way. I know they transitioned to Snapchat after he asked to video chat and stopped using Instagram. ~3.5 yr gap from then to when they added each other on this latest instance of his Snapchat. Proof I nailed it on at least two counts in our previous talk when I told her that "I don't remember" isn't the defense she thinks it is. It's just harmful stonewalling and lying and I'm going to operate under the assumption: of the possible answers, it's the worst one. Don't remember how long it has been going on for? I take that to mean it's been the whole time. It happened before our relationship and never stopped. She acknowledged that he had asked for sexual pictures. I asked when he started that. "I don't remember." Well that just means that's the status quo. You don't have an event to point to because it didn't stand out. That's just the nature of your conversation. It's always been him pushing boundaries and asking for it. So when I ask what video she sent and she says "I don't remember?" When I ask what else she has sent and she says "nothing else inappropriate?" Well I don't have proof but I know what my gut feeling is. Let's not get into the "inappropriate" nature of the admitted venting to your ex who about our relationship problems... Time for another confrontation with newfound evidence to poke holes. Let's see if it's enough to trigger her to come clean now on the rest. She tries to minimize it. Reiterates that nothing else inappropriate was sent. I tell her that the whole thing is inappropriate and should have been shut down when it started in the way that it did. I asked what was exchanged on Snapchat. She said he asked for more but that she told him I'm married and don't want to do that. I pointed out that he was calling her sexy and asking to video chat and there's no hint of that sentiment in the months it took to move to Snapchat. All I see is (AP):"you're looking sexy" (WW) "thanks. you're looking good too!" and "Im 8 mo pregnant, tired, and don't want to be on camera." Nothing even vaguely expressing its inappropriate or that you want it to stop because you're married. Just quick on the draw when he asks to see that sexy belly or that cute face. Asking to video chat, a shared Snapchat username, and right on over to the platform designed for sexting. Either it's as you say, that you didn't care about him at all and just went along in the most passive way imaginable or you were an enthusiastic participant. I think it's the latter. She deflects and brings up me texting my ex at one point with a picture of our new baby. Also mentioned a girl I have on Snapchat. Turns out she must have snooped in my phone? Well she never mentioned it to me despite "it shaking her." Another example of a huge personality flaw of hers. No communication. She just bottled it up and used it as justification for eroding our marriage. If she had mentioned it at the time, it could have been addressed and put to rest. One benefit to living a clean life. I told her that my recollection of the nature of the conversation I had with her was that it was short, congratulating her on getting married and sharing that we had our daughter. That I haven't spoken to her since. As for the other one brought up that's a Snapchat friend, she is a childhood friend that was a few years younger and not an ex. Our parents worked together and our families hung out a lot. That she's in a happy long term committed relationship on the other side of the country and that I havent seen her since we were like 15 and 12. That we had previously talked in college and before our relationship about each others' relationships. Mainly to vent about ones that had ended or complain about the lack of options. At one point she was in one where he wasn't very committed and I told her she deserves better. I hadn't said anything during a relationship besides being happy and wishing her the same. This all being prior to our relationship. Since then it's pretty much just random pictures you send out to everyone like stuff our family is doing or of her and her SO/dog, but not engaging directly. So yeah, nice try at deflection, but these are wildly different actions. All this gives me the idea to go see if she's got her old phone around somewhere with old messages from before we dated. I had seen the stuff mentioned in the previous post, but had drawn a line back then to not look at anything from before we dated. I feel it's relevant now for texts with AP at least, to be an example of how they interact. Found it, and checked when she was away. Read their conversation history. Everything out of his mouth is sexual. Pushing for photos. Sending nudes. He was married at the time. She wasn't super cooperative at first, bringing up the wife, but still ended up sending nudes in response to his. About a year and a half before we got together, while she was between boyfriends, he asked to meet her at a hotel when she came back home for the holidays and she agreed. Later said she couldn't because she just started dating someone and wasn't the type of person to do stuff with two guys. Partial credit I guess? Still not a great look into the character of my wife to be comfortable as AP. Anyway. Stashed away the evidence. I did do some internet sleuthing and found the address, phone numbers, Facebook, etc of him and his wife. More on that later. In our conversations about him and their history together, she did mention that before we met, she was in a relationship where the guy was suspicious/jealous and was physically threatening (punched a wall next to her) and sexually assaulted her. That she had told the ex and he confronted the guy and made him back off. So there's a new aspect of trauma she hadn't shared fully. She had shared early on that she had a relationship with someone she was scared of who got jealous and started stalking her but hadn't shared the rest. She won't tell me his name which is probably good for my own continuing "not in jail" legal status, but fuck.... I can appreciate what he did for her and still think he's scum. I can understand the sense of owing him for that and wanting that as an option for protection, which lead to putting up with it despite not wanting to follow through (as she claims). That doesn't excuse continuing into marriage though. It's also fertile ground for an emotional affair if he's the confidant she talks to when things are rough. There's also the "well I've seen it already so it's not a big deal if you send more pictures" aspect that makes it easy to slip into that dynamic.
More to follow. I did however have a session with an IC thru talkspace which went well. She brought up BPD which after looking, I can't say hits on all counts but there's definitely a lot of overlap with the Petulant subtype.
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I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost a year after ending a horrible loveless marriage about 2 years ago. When my boyfriend (55) and I (40) met, sparks flew and we hit it off immediately. I had already given up on the idea of having children after being stuck in an unfulfilling marriage so it was a surprise when my boyfriend and I learned we were pregnant with my first baby (he has 2 teenage children). During the duration of our relationship (much of it being pregnant), he has given me various nicknames including some that I find hurtful and rude. He’s trying to be funny and gives other people nicknames but I just wish it was something more endearing from him, especially being pregnant and carrying his child. Things between us have gotten more strained at we approached our baby’s due date, yesterday, and I can’t help but start to internalize his various nicknames. In the duration of our relationship, he’s called me “not too choosy floozy”, “mostly white woman” (I’m multiracial), “5/8 fiancée”, “incubator”, and most recently “almost MILF.” Not only does he call me these names but he’ll change how I am identified in his cell phone so these various names have come up at different times on his cell phone. I have told him that its offensive and hurtful, especially “not too choosy floozy” since I had recently been separated before meeting him. Right now, I feel like I’m losing autonomy in my pregnancy having had the due date come and go yesterday and I truly just feel like an incubator. There was some concern 4 days ago about decreased fetal movement and we called L&D triage who advised us to do fetal movement counts. The baby started moving more normally and has been pretty active since then but he was still upset and concerned about the decreased fetal movements, despite me telling him and trying to reassure him that I was feeling the baby actively move normally in the last few days. I also tried to get him to feel the movements but he was too impatient and didn’t feel what I was feeling. We had an argument last night and ended up going to get checked out at L&D triage to appease him and all the fetal heart monitoring and activity was normal. They checked my cervix which had no signs of dilation or effacement yet. I’m just not in early labor yet, which is what I also have been telling him, but I feel like things are progressing as expected with some BH contractions and low pelvic cramping but not consistent with any patterns. On the way home he basically told me he’s only worried about the baby and not what I’m feeling. So not only do I not feel heard and unsupported, I truly feel like I am just an incubator at this point. I feel like I’m stuck and not seen for who I am as a complete person and it feels so degrading, especially trying everything I can to be a good mom to our unborn baby. When it comes time, I don’t know that I even want him in the delivery room.

I'm itching for a new game but I'm not sure what to pick. I've rounded it to a few options. Also it would be appreciated to get some views from people who have actually played these games.
Luigi's Mansion 3. I loved the original Luigi's Mansion on the gamecube and this game looks great, although I have a couple concerns. For one, I'm worried that the game might lack the charm of the original game, which was the primary thing that made it so special, then again I had to actually play the game myself to understand how good it is. For two, I'm not sure if I'd be able to replay it much. Is the game well paced to keep me interested during a second playthrough? Most games open up just a bit too slow and boring, resulting in a tedious replay.
The Second game is Splatoon 3. I already have Splatoon 2, so is this game worth buying, or should I stick to the second game? I haven't really been playing the splatoon games all that much recently so I'm hoping maybe this will get me back into the series. And I know I'm a year and a half late so will it be hard to get into it with more experienced players in the game?
Lastly we have Kirby and the Forgotten Land. I'm a pretty big kirbh fan. I've played and beaten most of the mainline games. I've heard incredible things about this game but when I watch gameplay footage it doesn't necessarily look incredible. The idea of a fully 3D kirby game never quite sat right with me, so that makes me pretty skeptical. Does Kirby truly translate well into 3D, or would a long-time fan of Super Star and Return to Dreamland be disappointed in the level design and level of creativity?
These games all look great and they've all got a 9/10 on NL. Also here's a quick replay on my history related to these games. Former Splatoon fan hoping for revived interest, Kirby fan skeptical over the transition to 3D, Luigi's Mansion 1 lover curious for another unique experience.
What do you all think?

As the title says, what do you think? I did read a few comments here and there, so I'll share my ideas and maybe expand upon existing ones.
Birthday (Player): It's cool that the Agents have birthdays, so I wonder if Belle and Wise have official ones, if they do, then I do wonder how and what purpose our Player Birthday could be for, yeah free stuff, but idk what else it can do?
Maybe small dialogue changes from NPCS and Agents, idk, how it can work for the players, if Belle and Wise if have official birthdays.
Birthdays (Agents): Same thing but for Agents, maybe they could send a mail personally from them, and ask to personally invite us in a specific day/evening or night. (Would love to see like no specific time ngl, just straight up available during the day till the night).
Birthday Events (Special): If it's a Birthday of an Agent like Anby/Billy/Nicole, one of them could notify or at least initiate a conversation with you and ask if you want to spend some time with them. Which will increase the trust of a specific faction.
But the one who has a birthday gets the most benefits and have discounts and some special items during their birthday.
Maybe during it, they could say "I feel hungry wish I could eat something right now" so you could give something related to the current event (and some minimal differences if it does not meet the requirements).
And before the whole day ends you could gift one of the Agents to increase/decrease their trust tremendously if given or some dialogue for it to say goodnight and goodbye.
Trust: Even if they probably invite you in an event, quite sure in certain scenarios are locked behind it, so maybe this could help and unlock some extra bonuses in a faction or agent.
(Maybe this should unlock Birthday Events, so at least they won't just randomly invite you/some stranger when they met you moments ago, but idk, just a random thought).
And maybe unlocks certain dialogue and events early, for some agents (and possible new ones) regardless of their trust levels, even if they barely know you, they could trust the ones in the faction they're in and talk about a specifc character.
And possibly gain more gifts via mail from Agents when it's your birthday? And maybe a special exclusive item from them once they have a max trust value. Idk sounds like a cute idea lol.
Seasonal Events and Seasonal Outfits (Special): If there's seasons, maybe everyone (yes everyone) gets to wear something on a holiday and have a break from missions, maybe some generous discount/increase prices, special exclusive holiday items etc.
(Which is probably disabled/unable to use during it the holidays, but idk if that sounds like a bad idea).
So maybe spending a holiday with a faction (or maybe everyone if possible) could give a special picture with the faction(s).
I guess a photo album can work to record these events and moments together.
That's probably all the ideas I have, was thinking of adding these ideas to a survey if they do, and maybe add the rest of ideas below here too probably.
I'm seriously excited for what they could do and possible add in this game, so the thought/feedback does count. This sounds like...a lot of work and effort.
(Note: Totally and seriously not an excuse for my favourite being on screen and possible give me something as a gift and maybe personally receive an invitation from them and die in happiness/hj)

My 20 year old daughter has completed a medical certificate program and been offered her first job in that field. I’m super proud of that. For context, this comes after a failed attempt at a 4 year university (which I have a loan for). She went into her first year with 22 college hours earned during high school. It was not academics that were the problem. The school was a terrible fit, and it was another time I tried to get her to look at other options. Her then-boyfriend was there and convinced her it was where she should be. It was the only college she considered.
She was recently offered a job in the city that university was in. It’s really the only place she looked. The only housing she can afford would be apartments set up for students where you pay by the room. The car she’s been driving (older, with higher miles) also has a small loan in my name. She made the payments during her break from school. She pays the insurance and gas. When she began looking for jobs with the intention of moving to this city, I told her I wasn’t comfortable with the car going there while it’s in my name. If it breaks down and she doesn’t want to fix it, I have to be the one to deal with it. It’s older and though it hasn’t given us major problems yet, it’s definitely not a new car.
She was offered this job Friday and has found an open room to rent. She’s insistent that she wants THIS job, but really, she wants to be in THIS city. I’ve tried talking to her about working locally, saving, and getting some experience to set herself up for success when she does move. Here is my dilemma… she doesn’t have enough money saved to buy the car outright from me. If I refuse to let her take it, I feel that she will be resentful. I’m not sure if she can move without one. There is a limited commuter rail, but I’m not sure if it would get her to her job location. I asked her to create a quick budget of what she felt her expenses would be but she has not. She insists that her expenses will be limited by choosing these apartments targeted at students. However, I remember horror stories of extra fees from parents with students in apartments during her time there. The university is also in a high-crime area, and cars are regularly broken into, which could also come back on me financially.
I’m not trying to keep her home, but I don’t want her to need to come back because she set herself up to fail again. She has struggled with her mental health after her dad walked away from our family (They were super close and he was very involved until he wasn’t at all.) and even more so after her brief college experience. She’s been in therapy consistently, but it is also a factor.
I’m at a loss. I don’t need the car, but I also need to protect myself financially. She absolutely expects me to allow her to take it.
Any ideas? Her older siblings are all successfully supporting themselves. One is still at home but pays all her own expenses plus a small rent to me.

Hey all! Looking to run a one shot that will be loosely tied to a running campaign in which I am a player. (DM needs a single or couple session break)
In the current campaign we are just level 4 and all the players were very excited to do a one shot with our current characters but leveled up. I did ok this with the dm with the idea that I would create an odd dream-like type one shot or perhaps something that happens “outside of time”. This gives the dm the option to incorporate this one shot into this canon or not at all and it’s just a fun one shot. Players will be level 10. 5 players in total.
The loose idea I had is that all players will, without memory of how they got there, end up on this purgatory like realm. In that realm they will have to prove that they are worthy of being given another chance on the material plane (insinuating death or a more mistake in the main campaign if the dm so chooses). I want to present the team with some options for proving their way out with a combination of dangerous puzzles and fights monsters.
My loose idea was perhaps they have to pick one of the material planes as a theme (fey, abyss, etc.) I would also like to make it extremely challenging and potentially make it so that they fail if they loose multiple people.
Looking for ideas on puzzles, setup, themes, etc. just looking for creative ideas that I can work off. Thank you so much!

Hi all,
I am quite clueless when it comes to golf but personally have a Fenix 7 Pro for hiking, running and that sort of thing. With fathers day (which coincides with his birthday actually) around the corner I'm running out of ideas for a guy who pretty much has it all. He LOVES golfing and will go out 3+ times a week sometimes, but generally wouldn't like if he had to stop and input shots and slowed down his game.
Since my mom, brother, and I all have Garmin's I was looking to add my dad to the group so maybe he'd be healthier and also for his golf game! The problem lies in if he has to manually input shots or if the data/process is generally more of a pain than it's worth, then it's a whole lot of money for something that he wouldn't be able to enjoy (and that's kind of the point here!).
So for those of you that have this combo, is it generally hands-off and the data is fairly accurate? Do you enjoy having it yourself or is it more of a pain than its worth? I have been reading a lot of other reviews and it seems to really be a 50/50 of "it's great and I like it" or "not worth the money don't bother" - so I'm hoping that you all can help me out! Thank you.

This situation has been going on for quite a while and I need people opinions about it. (I’m sorry for my poor English).
Me and my bestfriend have known each other for almost 5 years. He was the first person I have ever felt a real connection with in all my life and it’s thanks to him that I feel like I’m alive. We spent a lot of time together in school, playing video games and also going outside. We also got to a point in our friendship where we both opened up about our problems.
It was in this occasion that I started to feel that something was off. After some things he said about friendships in general (which I won’t talk about in this post firstly out of respect, secondly cause it would make it too long) I had the impression that he was more connected with a friend we have in common than with me.
At the moment I thought that was totally fine, but later on I realised how unfair it was. He was my brother, my priority in life, my bestfriend above all, even my family, and for him I was nothing more than a second choice. I was second place to someone who didn’t even care about him the way I did and more than that put other people above him. I didn’t talk about it with him though as I didn’t wanna be seen as the one trying to sabotage their friendship despite the fact that everything I had to say was real.
Fast forward a year and the situation is still the same. We are still bestfriends and as all young people do we start to dream about things we could do in the upcoming summer. All ideas and even promises that were broken. During summer we ended up seeing each other only 4-5 times (counting some birthdays that were celebrated in those months) despite the fact I always reached out to him and asked him to hang out, to which he always answered ‘no’ or found stupid excuses becoming dryer and dryer at every text. I ended up rotting in bed for most of the season, even though we told each other we would have done lots of things.
Later on I asked him about why he seemed to be wanting to avoid me, maybe he was having some problems in private so I asked. He said that everything was okay and that we had hang out already too much, but that he would make an effort to hang out more. Blinded by the love (platonic love) I felt for him I excused him once again. However that was a mistake. In the following months (up until December) I still tried to create occasions to see each other. To all my questions he always replied no.
At this time I started to realize that maybe he was a bad friend after all. He never asked about my day (I did), he didn’t read most of my texts, he always admitted to not care about what I was talking about (I thought he was joking but maybe he wasn’t), he was always dry, he never reached out first, he never made time for me. All things that I did to him because I loved him (platonically).
I decided once again to talk about it with him. I specified how I felt about everything, how I didn’t feel appreciated and how I was always comprehensive about the situations. At first he was angry. He replied he was sick of being seen as ‘the bad friend’. Then he calmed down and said that he was sorry I felt that way, that he would try to reach out first and make time for me and that he still considered me as his bestfriend and also loved me. But I didn’t feel that. It felt like he never wanted to be with me alone. The only times we would be together were only if our other friends were with us. But that wasn’t the case with his other ‘bestfriend’. Whenever this friend suggested something he was always down and never came up with different excuses.
To cut it short. It’s been 5 months since that conversation and the one to still start the conversation, the one still trying to see each other, the one still putting effort into the friendship was me. All his effort went to that other ‘friend’ we have in common (who I get bad vibes from). That’s when I realised I was watering a dead plant.
So, AITA for ghosting my ‘bestfriend’?

Watching Hermitcraft for a few seasons and through multiple updates to Minecraft it starts to feel like the content is quite similar. Apart from the obvious fact that it is still Minecraft. More in along the lines of the game being in such a state now that within 3 episodes, almost every material/block/item/mob is part of a farm and everyone is flying everywhere.
It almost changes from a survival game to a creative game, and while I do enjoy seeing what crazy, builds, farms, shops, games, challenges, etc the Hermits create, it feels rather rinse and repeat with very little survival remaining.
So I got thinking, I played 1.7.3 for a while and I thought it would be an interesting experience to see all the Hermits head back into 1.7.3, taking all their building skills and ideas into a new world and see what they create. With the usual quality of life mods.
There would be no Elytras, so roads and rails would no longer be decorative. Material farms would be far more limited, and no easy access to high quality gear through trading, taking the game back to a survival base. Sure over time the Hermits would tame the server, working as a community to make the server safer, but there would always be higher risks and rewards. Basic redstone and no hunger or sprint would change a few playstyles too.
It's a silly thought but something I'd be curious to see, how about you all?

Me and my best friend are both 19 and 4 years ago, I ended up liking one of his ex right after they broke up. She was always very friendly with me and tried to be very close to me. I always hung up fast and pushed her away but when they broke up I ended up making moves on her without thinking, I was 15 and had no relationship experience, I realized my mistake and my friend forgave me. Told some time to build back trust and be good friend again.
Now where much closer and another situation happened. We both liked the same girl in a freshmen summer college program and i ended up pursuing her and continuing to like her while he didn’t. We were very friendly with one another and i ended off the program giving her a hug and she said she’ll miss me. I felt like there could have been more with us if i just told my shot. I ended up texting her over the rest of the summer left and I enjoyed texting her. I wanted to get on call with her but she shut that down instantly and soon after ended up ghosting me for days on her roblox and nap grind. I lost interest after that. Then when the fall semester started I went to the other campus while her and my bestfriend went to the main campus. My friend knew about everything with me and her. I told him I didn’t like her anymore and it ended up nowhere obviously. They started to get closer and hanged out a lot on campus, mainly alone. Over time they started going out and end up liking eachother. My bestfriend is very friendly and physical with girls. Always ended up a lady’s man.
I wasn’t very comfortable about it especially when being around them if I did go to the main campus but i didn’t have anything with her and things were going somewhere with them so way have a problem. I just let them be, he knew she was weird but was down to just mess around. Doing cute relationship things never hurt no one and they ended up stop talking to eachother. She later on ended off unfollowed him and blocked him.
Later on a few months she wished me a happy birthday and starts to chat with me (I told my bestfriend this). I was down to be cool and since my bestfriend is transferring next semester. Having someone to be cool with her and there would have hurt. After a week and a half of texting she invited me to go out to eat with a group. Her friend and her boyfriend and maybe another girl. I was down to go the next day and when I was on the train, my friend called to hang out and I said I was going out with her and a group. He hung up and now he’s saying it part 2 of my first mistake.
I understand i never got far with her and he did, especially with her guaranteed liking him but I wasn’t trying to make a move. Did i mess up again or are we both maybe in the wrong.
TL;DR! I was trying to be cool with my friends last talking stage who I also liked before. She invited me to eat out in a group and now I might lose my best friend.

I grew up in Germany and when I was 13, moved to Australia with my family. Fast forward 5 years and my dad was desperate for me to go back for a year after highschool and a failed year of university. I reluctantly said yes, because I didn't know anyone over there anymore, and spent 10 months with my grandmother. A good former friend of my dads, and my godfather, took me under his wing as well for a while, and handed me an investment account as soon as I arrived. It had a decent sum in it for an 18 year old and I was told that people had donated money into it for my birthdays and Christmas since I was born.
Fast forward 20 years, and my dad had a massive argument with this friend about something I'm not aware of and they are not talking anymore. I haven't been in contact with my godfather for the last 15 years either, due to my parents splitting up and not being able to keep up with the back and forth emails after a few years - life goes on. Now I found out that the money given to me was his idea and mostly his money he gave me, whereas I was always told it was a family thing. I managed to put myself through college with it and feel really bad now, especially since I don't know where he is or what his contact is. I don't even know what I would say to him if I ever found him again. The whole thing is a bit messed up and I feel really guilty now for not knowing.

I've recently found out that I have ADHD (Inattentive) and Asperger's Syndrome. High IQ, I struggled with the last quarter of high school and completely crashed and burned in college while trying to pursue something in Architecture & Construction.
I've always wanted to go back to university eventually after figuring out what exactly I would be good at, what I would be motivated to complete and what would be useful and directly relevant to my life and the way I would earn a living. I know I might end up not needing a college degree considering the fact that I chose the freelance/entrepreneurship path, but it feels like something I will never stop wanting to achieve, and I can't deny that there are benefits to a good college education.
All that said, I now know that it was the AuDHD that made it difficult for me the last time I was in college, and that knowledge has changed my perspective on life and on business.
In my pursuit of self-awareness and understanding of the world around me, I've come to really love the field of psychology. And by psychology I mean everything to do with personalities and personality disorders, with neurodevelopmental issues and with the big topic of "purpose." Apart from creative pursuits, it's the only other thing I find myself obsessively digging deep into without being asked to, sometimes spending days and even weeks on an idea.
I don't know what I would do with a Psych specialisation and how it would be of economic value to me, and I'm not entirely sure I'll love it as a 4 year program, but at the moment it's calling me.
Anybody in here who pursued that path? What was college/university like for you? What did you study specifically, and why, and is there anything you would do differently?
Any advice or resources would be greatly appreciated.

My ex girlfriend and I were together for 2 years and 4 months. I was his fifth boyfriend while she was my first official girlfriend (since my 2nd year h/s fling isn't included).
To give a context, I met her when she was still in a relationship with here 4th bf, tho it was about to end because she had issues against the man. my ex and I started as friends, via chat and our relationship progressed too fast that after a week, I decided to admit my feelingsfor her - with the intention to just confess then move on. But No, she also admitted about her feelings. Of course, since she was still in a relationship at that time (tho they in a cool off) we decided to stop our conversation. Unfortunately we can't. We were so attached and emotionally invested in each other that we just can't let go. My point here is that, right from the start we knew that there was something unexplainably unique about our relationship. To the point that I already believed that there is indeed destiny.
However, our relationship was not as good as it seem to others. We had so many issues, some were unresloved. But the worst (I guess) was my anger issues. I easily get disappointed to persons close to me, because I expect them to understand and know me, hence, I tend to say harsh things, yelling at people around me - an attitude which I got from my own family (of course, I'm not blaming them, but just to give a context). Nevertheless, please do note that I don't hurt people physically. For so many times she asked me to change it or else she might leave. I did promise her that I'll change, I made effort to change, and I know and she knew that I made some progress. However, I couldn't completely get rid of it, I still have that anger issues whereas I still lash out when I cannot anymore control my emotions. No matter how hard I try to change, still it seems that it's a part of me, and I guess I need pychological help.
The last time that I lashed out to her was April 6, but I was able to say sorry and make it up to her (I thought I did). However, she broke up with me at the midnight of April 16th, two two days after our monthsary: She asked me if I'll be upset if she woulf have to breakup with me. That time, I realized that maybe I just had to giver her some space because I thought that we just needed SOME time apart (because we've done it before and we even broke up for a week). But the last time was different. We broke up in good terms but after a few days she started to spite me, and even started talking with other men. (Twas too fast, I believe).
So I decided to talk to her in person (because we broke up in chat because I can't see her during those time - but also note that distance was never an issue here...) and when we met, I begged her to come back. CryingI pleaded for several times, but each time she would say no - that her decision is final. Explaining that even her friendswould look down on her if she would still enter into a relationship with me, and even her mother was already upset to me (I heard it on the phone when she called my ex while we were talking). And most of all, she said that she can't anymore wait for my growth/change. We cried. But still we had amake out and hugged each other. She even told me how she loved me so much; "but I have to choose myself this time" she said.
Now, it's been a month since our breakup. But it's still so fresh for me. I still cry even today. I'm so attached to her and dependent that I don't know how to live without her. I love her so much despite hurting her emotionally. I've sworn to myself that if ever I'll be given a chance to hsve her back, I'll never mess it up again. I know I'm do stupid for doing it too late. But you know, I still hsve this hope in me, that although her words tell that it's over, yet her actions would somehow show the contrary for many reasons, such as: 1. She still keeps all the things I gave her and she asked me to keep also some of her things like her guitar (which she said would be of more use to me than her), and she asked me to keep our picture in a frame which she used to place on her desk (because she said she would just get hurt by looking at it). 2. I told her when we met that I'll be waiting for her, so long as she doesn't have a boyfriend yet, and her reply: "please don't pressure me". If I really do not anymore have the chance, she could've instead told me not to wait anymore. 3. Although she posts and reposts about relationship problems with men - and at the same time about her current happenings with a man, which they are now in a talking stage - she still get to look at my stories, posts, and I even made a playlist on spotify wherein I invited her to join and she accepted. AND: she is used in posting her thoughts and rants about our relationship problems in Twitter, but lately ever since I started sharing my sentiments also in Threads, she also did the same! She is now posting in Threads, not anymore in Twitter - and I know so that I'll het hurt, and at the same time I'll get to know (or st least, have an idea) about her current life happenings.
4.Also, she still asked me to attend her graduation.

1. Lastly, in EVERY letter she wrote to me, she told me about how much she loves me (always / forever) and how much she looks forward to marry me. I still hold on to that until now. Because of thise words and actions she have shown, I am still hoping that she will return.

Damn, I love that girl so much that I am willing to give up anything for her (even though I find it too hard to change my attitude despite my serious efforts). But.. but, I badly want to change, I just don't know how I'll do it successfully. I promised myself that she will be the last girl I will ever lov in my life. After all, I don't think there is still love left to give to another when I gave it all to her.
Please, I need your opinions. So my questions are: 1. Is it still possible to fix our broken relationship? 2. If yes, what should I do, provided that she asked me not to contact her for a while? (No specific time frame was provided). 3. My guts tell me that I have to do something or else I'll lose her entirely since she's starting to tall to other men (tho according to her are just for fun), however, the fact that she told me not to have contact with her temporarily, I'm stumped whether I should talk to her and when should I.
Thank you, I hope you'll have the patience and kindess to read this.

Wall of BAWWWW incoming. I feel like I should preface this by saying that, as much as I hate myself, I’m probably not going to kill myself, so you don’t need to worry about that. I have pets that depend on me and a family that would be devastated if I died (which I don’t even have the decency to be grateful for) so I’m living, just out of obligation far more than a desire to actually be here. It makes me feel trapped and hopeless, but what can you do?
I’m a failure, and probably one of the most pathetic sorts of failure you can imagine, a failed artist. I loved drawing and storytelling and worldbuilding growing up and it really gave me a sense of challenge and fulfillment, and when I got to college age I decided I wanted to become a videogame artist to try and make a career out of that. Well, that hasn’t panned out like I hoped it would, I’m vastly outclassed by most other people competing in the field, and the rapid onset of AI has made things even worse. Why hire junior artists when you can just grind out a hundred AI generated pieces of concept art for free? Why should I try to get better when there’s hundreds of people who already have connections and will always surpass me anyway? I can’t even enjoy art as a hobby anymore because I’ve become so critical of anything I make, and now I’m scared to even try going back to just drawing for fun because there will always be that little voice in my head going “You weren’t good enough, disciplined enough, or persistent enough to make this work as a job. Maybe you could have done it if you weren’t such a lazy, insecure piece of shit, but now you’ve fucked up everything forever and fallen behind and missed your window. Fuck you.” Even outside my art woes, the world is just shit. Society is broken, modern media is nothing but slop designed to generate attention through hate-views and internet arguments, the governments of the world are actively screwing over the populace, and politics are becoming so violently polarized that nothing constructive is actually being done because people would rather just make things worse for the other team. I genuinely do not want to see what happens next in this shitshow, and I don’t really expect anything good to happen ever again.
I would say I want to stop trying to make a career out of game art, but the shitty thing is I’ve barely even tried. I should have been okay with sending out hundreds of applications to be rejected hundreds of times and working on improving myself and learning new skills every minute I can, because that’s what this field requires to even get a foothold. I thought I would be okay and that I could handle the challenge, but clearly that isn’t the case and I’m such a fucking lazy ass that I’ve given up before even really trying, because even the little bit I have tried was too much for me to handle. I’m 27 now, still living at home, barely driving, only working part-time. I’m a worthless piece of shit leeching off my parents because I’m too scared of leaving the nest and actually having to work hard.
I had a game project that I knew was a big scope and would require learning a lot of new things, but it seemed like something that would be fun and challenging. And for a while I felt really, really good working on it. I had a life coach who was helping me stay on track. I was slowly learning how to motivate myself with things other than shame and self-hatred. I had an idea of how to start small and make it a reality. Then I learned someone else was doing a similar project and they were leagues more talented than I was, and in that one day all the progress I made was just gone. It felt like the wobbly little tower I was building up underneath me had the base yanked out and I fell hard and never truly got back up.
I can’t go through that again, I can’t handle that kind of disappointment in myself and failure again. It hurt too much. So I think what I really want is to stop trying to try. You can’t fail if you stop trying, and if you make yourself stop caring about anything, it won’t hurt so much that you’re a failure in the first place. Ultimately that’s what I want, to stop caring about anything. I want to open up my skull and rip out every emotion, every aspiration, every goal, every bit of creativity, every little idea that will never be fulfilled, and get rid of it all forever. On my worst days I even want to get rid of my hobbies, my interests, and everything that might make me feel any scrap of positive emotion or interest just so I can be completely and utterly flat. They’re already not doing me much good. I can distract myself with games or other stuff, but distraction is all it is. Trying anything new might make me feel emotions, or even worse, be disappointing, so that’s off the table too. I want to find a medication that will blunt me so hard I never feel anything ever again. Just be an NPC with no inner monologue or opinions or aspirations and just go through the motions of life for the next sixty or so years until I finally die. Get a boring pointless job and just exist. That way I’m not really dead and my family doesn’t have to be sad, but I don’t have to really be living either. I don’t want to be happy because I don’t think I deserve it. I just want to not be sad.
I know there’s shit like mindfulness, detachment, self-compassion, and emotional acceptance. And those are all good and healthy things, but I don’t want that. I don’t want to be nice to myself because I don’t deserve it. I want to hurt myself (mentally). I want to break myself emotionally so thoroughly that I never feel or care about a single thing ever again. I want to rip my amygdala out. I want to kill my personality and just leave the body behind on autopilot. I’m tired of having no control over my emotions or thought patterns. Every other day I get into a depressive spiral like this, thinking about how much I hate myself and how badly I wish I could stop feeling things. If I could press a button and get rid of all of my negative emotions at the cost of my positive ones, you best believe I would do it.

I was researching what jobs are safe from AI and as I read the following article: https://www.uscareerinstitute.edu/blog/65-jobs-with-the-lowest-risk-of-automation-by-ai-and-robots
something popped out. The jobs least likely to be impacted by AI:
"are ones that require human qualities that a robot cannot replicate, such as social skills, emotional intelligence, and interpersonal relationships. Fields that are more creative and don’t stick to a rigid routine will also lower the risk of AI replacing jobs in that field."
The thought being, that the jobs we will inevitably have to focus on educating and training most people for will increase the skills far to many people lack, of which contribute to most of the societal ills we now face. This is exciting for a variety of reasons.
1) Most of these jobs are in fields that are suffering shortages that will be detrimental to society if not corrected.
2) Most of them are people facing meaning you are going to have to interact with other people to learn them.
3) The only way we are going to be able to funnel people into these "AI proof" careers is to invest heavily in education at all levels and lower or eliminate the barriers of entry to higher education.
4) Bye and large, these jobs will cause people to interact in ways that we don't currently which in theory should improve our ability to cooperate and relate to one another.
These are the ideas that first occurred to me but I'm sure there are tons more. There are obviously downsides as removing the vast majority of non-skill specific jobs will hurt a lot of people in the transition period. There will also always be people who will struggle to excel in even the best educational environments and fall behind. For those people, it appears specific-skill vocational trades will be safe for years to come. I don't see AI replacing plummers, electricians, mechanics, most construction jobs, etc any time soon. Then there are the handicapable individuals whose disabilities allow for them to do some menial labor that will be greatly impacted.
While I understand contraianism and nihilism is the flavor of the day, especially in certain corners of the internet, I am myself an eternal optimist. There will come a point when the concerns of communities, governments and corporations converge. The necessity of investments in education, health and well-being will follow so that people can thrive, governments can function and corporations can continue to prosper. I do think, due to the speed of advancements in AI and the time it will take to adapt to those, there will be a ton of pain that follows. I am however optimistic that the outcome will be a more cohesive and less toxic society as a whole.
I am interested in seeing what others think about this and what excitement and fears AI invokes in them. As always, be kind to one another, as well as yourselves.

Question for all. My sister is basically a piece of garbage (28yr old) . She’s had shitty jobs for a long time and has lived with my parents for the last 4 years and her boyfriend before. She has no money saved up and a decent amount of debt in personal loans and credit cards, I don’t know exact total. She just got her second DUI and totaled her car that also didn’t have insurance, owes 8k on it still and my parents co-signed for it as well. She won’t be able to drive for a while and will have more fines and fees coming up.
My question is is bankruptcy a route she should take? My fear is she will drain all of my parents money as they try and pay her life off and drive her around while she can’t, for the foreseeable future. I feel bankruptcy could help her get a fresh start but don’t know much about it, and am not sure if the car loan my parents co-signed would just go to them then anyways.
Any ideas or advice is helpful, thank you! She’s in Michigan btw.

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/TASoDHype posting in AITAH
Concluded as per OOP
1 update - Medium
Original - 16th May 2024
Update - 17th May 2024
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AITAH for leaving my fiancée after I learned there were strippers at her bachelorette party?
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What the title reads basically. I(29M) and my ex-fiancée(29F) were together for 5 years. We should have been married now in the normal conditions but I broke up with her and cancelled the wedding 2 days before it because they invited male strippers to bachelorette party. I am personally not a fan of these parties but reluctantly agreed after both groom & bride side confirmed we would keep it simple. I told my ex-fiancée I am not comfortable with strippers or other kind of crazy things. She agreed. I also told my friends if they were to do a stupid thing without me knowing, we would have problems.
We stayed at my friends' summer house and chilled there by the pool, did some wow raids and played board games. My ex-fiancée and her friends went to a restaurant then rented an airbnb. There was no problem during the night and next day I asked how things went. She and her close friends said it was really chill and good. We returned to the city centre after that.
I encountered another bridesmaid that day when I was shopping for a bracelet for my ex-fiancée for her upcoming birthday. I asked that girl how's everything as we were in the same department at the college but rarely talk now. She is closer with my fiancée than me. She said it's going good and last night was crazy with all the strippers. After saying that she looked uncomfortable. I asked her about the details but she was not willing to tell much. I think she realized she should not have talked about it. I laughed, said goodbye and left.
I confronted my fiancée and she seemed surprised about it. She was denying it first, then told me nothing crazy happened and one of the bridesmaids invited strippers. I reminded her that it was a strict boundary for me. I asked about the details but she said there was nothing much with strippers just solo dances and that's it. I told her I need some time to think.
Almost all of the bridesmaids messaged me ensuring nothing happened when I was on my way back home(definitely not coordinated). Things happened after that but in the end I decided to break up and cancel the wedding. I lost some money since it was only 2 days before the wedding. Things are not cool right now. My head is messed up, I get criticism from everyone and no idea about what to do. My sister told me to see a therapist to process my thoughts and feelings. That is what I'll do next. Some mutuals suggested me that I should reconsider things and stop being so whiny about such a small thing. I do not think it's such a small thing especially when they all tried to hide it from me.
AITAH here?
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Comments
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tasty-horse-paste
This is strangely similar to something that happened recently on 90 day fiancé.
Edit: A lot of people saying disagreements about strippers etc. is common, which sure, but it was the detail about playing MMO games by the pool at the bachelor party that got my attention. But I'm not saying OP's story is fake; it just reminded me of the 90 day thing.
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former_farmer
Because this happens a lot. Some people think that cheating in the bachelorette party is correct. It's so dumb.
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boredathome1962
NTA. "It was crazy with all the strippers" is hugely different from "it was really chill and good". This isn't just lying, this is a total reversal of the truth. Even her "it was just solo dances" is not the same as "crazy". So they are lying, all of them, except the first one.

OOP: Everyone is telling different things. One person says it was crazy, my ex says it was just solo dance, another person says it was different. I do not know whom to believe to be honest and that's one of the reasons I lost trust here. Apparently, the stripper was naked and that even alone is a dealbreaker for me. There is no way for me to know what happened that night and why she did not even bother with calling me or telling me about it.

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**Judgement - NTA*\*
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Update - 1 days later
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TL;DR: Bitter truth was revealed bit by bit. Ex-fiancée had sexual interaction with a stripper. It's therapy time.
I read most of the comments in the original post and thank you for the advice. My problem was that not her being blindsided by her friends but lying. Every bridesmaid told different things and none of them gave details about what happened. I believe you can understand it just shatters the trust and makes you think there is something going on.
I thought there was something wrong with me after reading the comments. There were a lot of YTAs and I thought I should apologize. One of the bridesmaid reached out to me last evening. I suspect she saw the post somewhere and recognized it. I knew my fiancée was having problems with her friends since last week but I did not know the extent.
Apparently, my ex-fiancée and her close friends blamed the girl that I encountered at mall about everything. This divided the group and led into a verbal fight. I will skip the personal details here but in the end she told me my ex-fiancée and other bridesmaids got sexual with the strippers. My fiancée was the only one who had boyfriend/fiancée/spouse(at least monogamously) there to my knowledge. Also, I was told by her that my ex-fiancée was not blindsided with stripper invites. She was happy to see the strippers and was relieved she had an excuse. I do not have proof for all of these but I got a short video of girls making out with strippers. One of the girls is my ex-fiancée and that's enough.
She has been trying to reach out to me since we broke up. I confronted her again. At first, she denied it again then it became we just touched, then okay we kissed too, okay I gave him a handjob, finally I was coerced into doing these by others as I pressed on. I just blocked her after the last part. I did not see any need to learn further. I was hurt already but learning that I got cheated on hurt more. I am not sure if it's the full truth even now. I will never know but all I can say is it hurts. I will go to a therapist to not carry my luggage to my next relationship. I lost 15K from the wedding related things and need to focus on filling the hole for a while.
Some misogynists made weird comments about women and I'll just ignore them. Some of the people told me I am an insecure, unfunny nerd for playing WoW on my bachelor party. Isn't the whole point of bachelor parties having "one last fun". It was raiding non-stop with the boys for me, not having one last sexual interaction with a stranger or having a stranger's butt on my face or penis. I will not miss on out these during marriage anyways(omitting the stranger part).
That's it. It's therapy time tomorrow and thank you for the help.
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Comments
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scotswaehey
I will never understand why people like your Ex Fiancée throw it all away for one night
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BigBlackBlasphemer
Not just that, the whole group had banded together in solidarity to lie.
If it wasn't for one person, they would've gotten away with it, while gaslighting OP the whole time
I hope all those votes calling OP, an AH rightly feel like DA's.
15k and a cancelled wedding is still LOADS better than divorce after the fact. You're doing the absolute right thing.
Also, I AM petty enough to blast her publicly with receipts if she wants to play the victim and make me look like the bad guy.
And the first person I'll send the video of her cheating to is her Dad. See how she likes those apples
PSA: Don't be the simp guy who didn't want to send his "wife" to jail after everyone caught her trying to poison him with bleach in the coffee machine.
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SuccessfulSeaweed385
I had a lan party at my bachelor party and it was awesome. Fuck the haters and screw your ex. NTA.
FarquaadStoleMyWig
My brothers bachelor party was pizza, flip cup, and halo reach on system linked Xbox’s. Fucken best night ever
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I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments

Hello ​Apple 👋
Do hope this post finds you well.
My name is Sae, I am a 26-year-old indie iOS app developer based in Virginia, USA. I would like to introduce you to my little robot tutor ADAv1 that I have been working on for a little while now. I was curious about the possibility of making my own JARVIS from IronMan running on my iPhone, a truly smart assistant with agency/capability to do things on behalf of the user without needing prompting, and this is what came of that. It is essentially a voice-powered GPT (current version) with low latency that allows you to talk to her naturally without pressing any buttons or typing. One that takes the best currently available models and combines them into a single hive mind brain (a main brain model choosing which agent models to use depending on the nature of the request). It has an agentic side to it that is coming soon (within the week I hope) that could be really cool, imagine being able to give your robot tasks to do (code work, essays) and have it work on it for you iteratively using a creative agent model and a guider agent model working together to thoroughly do your assignment for you according to your design principles/requirements/constitution.
It also has an assistant mode (ala Rabbit R1) that is rather quick prompty, allowing the user to rapidly do things and access other apps (Spotify, Uber, Blackboard Learn, etc..) with just a few simple prompts. A work in progress, the sky is the limit in terms of what apps can be accessed this way and the hope is to allow the user to make their own apps and prompts.
I don’t want to waste your time and spout an essay here, I will keep it simple and share a little demo for you to get an idea of how it works and let you try it out for yourself.
The mission is to bring the best, most cutting edge AI-powered learning tools and package it/make it accessible/easier to use for all across the nation (and eventually the globe). To have an app that functions as a smart tutorobot that provides users a way to get a base education and be competitive in the job market regardless of their location/demographic/wealth level, for free while not comprising on features and functionality. The coming updates will show more of this tutor side of things, I just really wanted to get this current version out (about 60% through the planned feature roadmap at this point) and see what Apple fam thinks.
I think the happiest moment I have had in a long time was seeing my dad (an ardent AI-hating “ROBOTS TAKE OUR JERBS” kind of man bless his soul) talk to ADAv1 yesterday and witness the incredible magic of GPT for himself in a way he would never have got around to if it was just via text input/output. Seeing him talk to the robot and get it to help him with his job search (he is going through a lot of stress right now) and brainstorming angles to take in his interviews (he is in HR and got ADA to address some very niche topics in a helpful manner) quite literally made me cry a bit, as I never thought anything I could have ever built would provide value to my old-school/computer hating dad in such a real and tangible way. I only want others to know how excited this made me for the future, that the world is awesome and we will work tirelessly to make it more fair and equal for all. Accessible AI for all, everyone has the right to a THOROUGH and FREE education and we will collectively make this happen.
Two things to note for this version:
-Reset chat often to save tokens, longer context costs more as well as contexts with internet search data in it.
-close app completely when not using to save battery.
Have a great day everyone, thank you for your time and looking forward to feedback and suggestions. ❤️😊
-Sae

I'm a 27 year old guy and started taking sertraline a day after my 27th birthday, about 4 months ago and honest to God I should have started taking this shit way earlier.
I have OCD / General Anxiety Disorder with some autism sprinkled in (Asperger's) which has made my life quite fucking difficult, especially in aspects like getting a job. I've suffered in other aspects so long that I didn't even care about those aspects.
After losing the one job where they needed a silent awkward Analytical autist last november (they loved me but had to close down my department because of a bad financial year) I started getting rather depressed, it took me a lot of energy and help from a friend who happened to be a recruiter at the time to even get into that job and I felt like I was fucked, that I was gonna be a no job loser living with his mom forever, never having money for vacations with friends again and plenty of other dark thoughts that I don't intend on sharing here.
So I started going to job interview after job interview, constantly getting rejected and each rejection made me feel worse.
One of my friends noticed that I wasn't chatting with her as often as I used to and when she called me I finally broke down, I was at the ends of my wits, she encouraged me to finally seek help again.
I've tried therapy in the form of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy before, which I found to be worthless and I was offered Mindfulness as an alternative which I think of as a scam. (I'm certain mindfulness in the traditional sense is fine, but the westernized version is optimalized for capitalism)
So I asked my therapist to put me on medication for the first time in my life, I never wanted to have meds because I didn't want to be dependent on something and always thought it would mess with my brain, that I needed to fix my mental health issues through other means like exercise and meditation, which I always failed to keep doing consistently.
So here I am, 4 months on Zoloft:
My anxiety and OCD are still there, they probably won't ever leave but I am way more in control of them. Where they used to make me ponder anxiously for hours if not days, it now feels like Zoloft has created some insulation between my anxieties and myself, it's easier to just observe those anxieties, set them aside and go on with my day.
Now this is not to say that Zoloft is a miracle drug that makes life better automatically without any effort on your part but here's what I've been doing in the past 4 months thanks to being on Zoloft

• I signed the lease for my new apartment a week ago,
• I've started going to theatre classes, something I've always wanted to do but never could before because of my anxiety, it's super enjoyable and was a great way to test whether this shit was working.
• I started taking more care of my health, working out once a week, eating healthier.
• I genuinely feel like I am living a rather normal life instead of feeling like im surviving on a day by day basis.

I'm not entirely where I want to be, for example I still have a lack of motivation often (executive dysfunction) and I still get clammy/sweaty/vibrating in certain social situations like during theatre classes and job interviews but I feel a whole lot less worried about it all.
Next week I'm gonna talk with my therapist to up my dose from 100mg to 150mg and hoping that will help me fix my last issues, even if it does not I'm already a whole lot happier than I used to be.
So far I haven't shat myself knock on wood to not jinx myself and I haven't noticed any weird side effects other than my thyroids acting up on the very first day and never again after.
I can also drink with my friends just fine, which I started again after about 2 months carefully with one beer and very slowly building up my alcohol intake to the point where I can easily have a few beers and a few strong drinks at a party, nothing too excessive.
So yeah, I'm happy I started taking sertraline, also known as Zoloft, I initially started with the idea of taking it as an experiment to see what it does and go off it as soon as I could again but now I don't think I wanna do that anymore, not if I can live like this.
I still wish I started way younger, would have saved me a lot of pain and student debt, but I'll figure out something eventually, now that I'm on Zoloft I'm certain I will some day.