I think a lot about signals. Signals that show people what groups they belong to. Signals that hide the truth. Everybody uses signals to blend, entice, or trap.
Grandma Pearl died not long after her stroke, and I've been making bad decisions ever since. Maybe my expectations are too high, or I'm just an idiot. Either way, I ran away from the group home to be with people who called themselves my "family." They were the wrong people. They used the words family, brother, sister, and love like lock picks, stealing trust, and taking self-respect.
The only person I remember using the word family correctly was Grandma Pearl. She was a small woman who toured the US as an actress before settling with Granddad above their theatrical rentals shop. I was three when the car accident took Granddad and Mom, so I don't know if they used the word "family" correctly, but I hope they did.
I was never as outgoing as Grandma, but that didn't bother her; she taught me how to watch people. How to see their signals, and how to listen. When she died. I forgot a lot of those lessons for a while.
They called it a "family". The "family" moved product. That product could be goods, drugs, or people.
The uninitiated, like me, were distracted with food and a dry place to sleep, but it didn't take long to see behind the curtain. Things got too intense with the new "family" and I ran.
I ran back to my old neighborhood. The buildings were familiar even if my home was gone. The old theatrical shop had been turned into a microbrewery.
After an appropriate amount of self-pity, thirty minutes, I wandered the alleys, picking up cans or scavenging for bits and pieces that could be recycled, used, or bartered.
I recognized old faces, but I tried to stay out of sight. It was safer that way.
The only place I allowed myself to be seen was the old Lutheran church on the park's far side. Most people who might have known me had aged out of the congregation or died. It was worth the risk because St. Lazarus had a food pantry in the basement and gave out lunches most days, so I wasn't always hungry, which was nice.
I found a dry spot near the library to sleep, which seemed like a stroke of luck until it wasn't.
I had the contentment that came with being in a familiar place. Little bits of comfort let me believe, for a moment, that I wasn't a screw-up and hadn't trusted the wrong people. That moment scurried away when Stick found me.
Stick was a scary asshole. He technically wasn't in charge of the " family," but he made it work. He got things done. I have no idea how old he was. He was all corded muscle and could clock in between twenty and fifty. He looked half-starved and moved like a stalking predator, even with his limp.
His left leg was stiff. The knee didn't bend, and anytime he sat, his left leg would be splayed to the side like a kickstand on a bike. The leg was why he walked with a cane. The cane and how he used it was why we called him Stick.
I don't know why he took the time to track me down. It's not like I was wanted. Maybe it was that I had become property. Property shouldn't just wander off.
Sometimes, you feel a person before you see them. The air is different. When Stick was around, the air felt dead and motionless. I knew I was being watched before I opened my eyes.
Stick was sitting on a milk crate, his bad leg cocked to the side and his forehead resting on his cane. I pushed myself out from beneath the ductwork of the HVAC unit I had been sleeping under and slapped the dirt off my jeans.
"I thought that was you," Stick said as his sharp grin curved up to his unblinking dark eyes.
Stick wanted my discomfort. I'd seen him play the intimidation game too many times. He'd act too friendly, and then when you were good and worried, quick movements, a hand around the back of your neck, and violence would be next. Then he'd act like the whole mind fuck was a big joke, like you were friends, and isn't it great that you can joke around with someone who "really" cared.
It worked, too. If you were the unfortunate focus of Stick's attention, you would be grateful when he smiled and said, "Just a joke, kid. Don't be so sensitive." I'd seen the pattern enough times to know Stick trained people like dogs with his hot and cold game. I didn't like the game, or the fear, so I changed the pattern.
"Hey, Stick, did you come to help pick up cans?" I asked, making sure my smile reached my eyes. I was trying to be pleasant while ignoring the burning nervousness in my gut.
It was still dark out, but I could see Stick's expressions well enough.
Stick tapped his cane on the sidewalk and squinted at me skeptically before answering. "Just checking on my little brother."
We were not related.
Stick liked to call the uninitiated his little brothers or little sisters. He forced intimacy into his language. I didn't argue the point. Interactions went best with Stick when you agreed with everything he said.
"Thanks, man," I complimented, trying to sound genuine and ignorant as I stepped forward and offered him my hand.
Stick didn't move, but I could see that this conversation wasn't going as planned for him, and I forced myself not to react to his confusion. I couldn't break character, or he would know I was playing him.
Stick tapped his cane on the ground twice, grasped my hand, and stood. He watched me. I held his stare, but in an open, naive, guileless way that I had perfected in front of the mirror as grandma gave acting advice while she put her face on.
I once asked Grandma Perl why anyone would practice acting stupid. She pointed her mascara brush at me and, in her ditsiest Minnesota Nice character, said, "It's easier to be forgiven when people think you're a little dumb, don't ya know?" Like with most things, Grandma was right.
Before I understood what had happened, Stick pulled me into his side and slung an arm around my shoulder.
"You don't have a name yet. Everyone gets a name, but they don't get to pick it." He paused and gave me a Cheshire cat grin. "I have a name for you, little brother. You are going to be called Slide." Then he held my chin and forced eye contact." Your name will be Slide because I have never seen anyone slide out of shit faster than you. I can't tell if you do it on purpose or not, and I've been watching. I watch everybody. You do, too. Hell, this might be the first time I've ever heard you talk. So let's celebrate your name, Slide." Stick's smile slipped as he pulled me out of the alley. "We'll go do something special."
I stayed silent, knowing full well what was coming. Being named meant doing something you could never take back. It was public and would put you in prison if the police ever took the time to look for you. It meant severing yourself from your life before and relying entirely on the "family." I had been absent each time naming seemed to be in the cards, but I couldn't duck out this time.
There was only one place to go at this time of night that would have an impact, the Bodega.
The Bodega was a red hole in the wall with a glass door papered over with grocery ads years outdated. Canned salmon two for one seemed to be the dominant theme. Although there were two large windows, one on either side of the door, you could barely see in. The right window was a tapestry of cigarette promotions. The left window displayed the only swath of uncovered glass with a view of the interior. From the outside, the view was of tobacco, lottery scratchers, and Old Lady Imitari.
Old Lady Imitari owned the store. She was a short, dark-haired woman who always wore a long floral tank top. Grandma Pearl loved the old woman but said Imitari looked like an old man's thumb all the years she had known her, and Grandma moved to the neighborhood with Grandad thirty years ago. Imitari was a local legend even then because the Bodega was open twenty hours a day, three hundred sixty-five days a year, and no one else worked in the store. Grandma used to make an extra strong coffee called Barako and chat with Imitari sometimes when work in the shop was slow.
I would sneak out at night and try to catch Imitari sleeping. No matter the time, I never caught her snoozing, and she always saw me peeking at her through the window. I know she saw me because she would uncross her arms and wave her flyswatter at me.
All these memories flicked through my mind as Stick smiled his too-wide smile and pushed me into the Bodega.
Imitari flicked her fly swatter at me in acknowledgment, and her attention returned to the small TV she had nestled beside the cash register, which seemed to be the old woman's only real tether to the world outside her shop.
The inside of the Bodega was just a long hallway with shelves of convenience foods, drinks, home supplies, candy, and cold meds covering every available surface from floor to ceiling. The only break in the tunnel of products was the glass counter at the back corner of the store; Imitari presided over her mini domain by casually ignoring her shoppers. I tried to make eye contact with the old woman again as Stick pushed me to the back of the shop, but after her initial acknowledgment of our entrance, Imitari's eyes stayed focused on her TV.
As casually confident as possible, I walked to the cooler and grabbed an iced tea. "Want a drink," I asked over my shoulder, my voice unusually steady, given the electric current of anxiety flowing through me.
Stick sneered and tapped his cane twice on the ground. His eyes found all the security cameras in the tiny store, a frown creasing his angular features.
I followed his line of sight and finally realized what had bothered him. The cameras were fake. They looked like security cameras, but they weren't. There were no wires or lenses, just rectangles and circles in a security camera shape.
Stick took a deep breath and tapped his cane on the ground again. " There… is … so… much… here… to… see… but… no… one… is… watching," he said with a singsong. Then his sneer turned into a cruel smile.
I knew Stick wanted an audience for what he would force me to do. The fact that the security cameras were fakes meant that whatever was going to happen would now have to be significant. An event that the neighborhood wouldn't be able to ignore. My stomach twisted with the thought.
Stick waggled his eyebrows at me. He had been watching. He had seen my thoughts, and we both knew he had something terrible in mind.
The cane twirled in Stick's hand and then tapped twice on the shop tile.
"I think I want a little bit of this," Stick said, gesturing wildly with his cane, sending a row of soup cans tumbling to the floor. "And a little bit of that," Stick added as another wild gesture sent cups of ramen spinning and knocking glass bottles of hot sauce to the floor.
I stood paralyzed, unable to run. I was trapped with nowhere to duck away to. I didn't want Stick to hurt Old Lady Imitari, and I didn't want Stick to hurt me, either. The truth was, he would hurt both of us no matter what I did. That was just the way Stick was. I'd seen him. I'd seen him show us who he was every day.
Then I realized Imitari hadn't moved. She was watching her TV and chuckling at the sitcom as if nothing had happened.
Stick glanced at me, confused. I almost felt sorry for the sociopath. His night was not going to plan.
Imitari chuckled at her TV again, and a crease formed in the middle of Stick's forehead, letting me know that he was beyond angry. He was calm, dangerous, and vicious. People had been left for dead when Stick got this way.
Stick raised his cane and flipped it so the handle jutted like a pickax. He was going to attack Imitari.
Somehow, I moved. I didn't do much, but when I slid forward and grabbed the back of Stick's shirt, the cane missed Imitari, and the sharp handle punctured the thick glass top of the counter just above a roll of Lotto scratchers.
Old lady Imitari slowly looked up into Stick's eyes and smiled. Her wide, gentle frown was replaced with a look of joy and something else, something primal, something hungry. Her pupils were blown, and I had the uneasy feeling that I was watching someone be served their absolute favorite meal.
Before Stick could pull his cane from the punctured glass, Imitari casually reached forward, grabbed the cane, and pulled the wirey man forward. Small, old, and wrinkled, Imitari stared into Stick's eyes and overpowered him.
Stick fell forward across the counter. He tried to push himself back, but Imitari's hand clamped down on his wrist like a vice.
Bones ground together as Imitari pulled Stick's hand to her mouth, and with a swift, subtle movement, she bit off the tips of Stick's pinky and ring finger like she was sampling a cookie.
I jumped back next to the cooler as a thin spray of blood arched toward me.
Stick screamed and thrashed, but Imitari's small form was static and immovable. Stick was a fly in a trap. No matter how much he struggled, punched, poked, or kicked, he could not break the old woman's hold. Then, slowly, she took another bite.
It was strangely fascinating watching the frail form of this old woman I had known for years take bite after bite out of Stick. This man, whom I thought of as a predator, a hunter, an enforcer, was crying and begging while an old woman, who looked like a wrinkled thumb in a floral top, quietly devoured him.
I was surprised by the lack of blood after the first spray. I'm sure it was Imitari's crushing grip that stanched the flow of blood. The flesh of Stick's arm looked white from the pressure.
Hand over hand, Imitari pulled Stick forward. Bones cracked as she gripped higher on Stick's arm, clamped down with her long leathery fingers, and fed the flesh and bone, one concise bite at a time, into her open smiling maw. It was rhythmical in its simplicity: chomp, crunch, chew, chew, swallow. Over and over, the pattern continued until the begging stopped.
Stick wasn't dead. He gave up. Not struggling, he laid over the glass counter like a rag doll. He watched me glassily as Imitari took bite after bite, and I knew he wasn't there anymore. Whatever made Stick Stick had either curled up and hidden in a dark corner of his mind or had been devoured with his arm.
The old woman seemed displeased that her meal had stopped struggling. She shook him, but he flopped, and his head lulled from side to side. Imitari frowned, let go of Stick's arm, and pushed down on the limp man's back. Blood gushed from the ragged stump, and Imitari lowered her mouth and drank from the wound like she was sipping from a garden hose.
Stick didn't move. He just grew pail, and eventually, his panicked, shallow breaths ended, and the blood stopped flowing.
Then Imitari stood. With a quick tug, she pulled Stick's body over the counter and let it flop to the floor at her feet. Her eyes closed. A contented smile bloomed on her face as the explosive sound of crunching and cracking bones echoed through the small shop.
The deafening sound of crunching stopped, and only the buzzing of the drinks cooler reverberated through the small space. Imitari opened her eyes and watched me, a broad smile still on her lips. At that moment, I realized I could hear the drinks cooler so well because I had crawled into it, wedged between the glass door and the shelves.
Imitari held me with her gaze as cords of pink flesh lowered from the ceiling and efficiently tidied up Stick's mess, lapping up blood and hot sauce, placing cans on shelves, and scooping up cups of ramen with whip-like tendrils. Then, the cords of flesh nudged me forward, and I stood before Old Lady Imitari.
The thing that I had always thought of as a stern old woman handed me Stick's cane. With the same benign smile I remembered from buying red hots from it as a ten-year-old, it waved me away with its flyswatter, and the cords of flesh pushed me out the door onto the sidewalk.

My partner bought a second hand 1541 body on yahoo auctions for what seems like a good deal. I’m excited about the machine as well. Only thing is the machine comes without a table and pedals.
Any suggestions for what I need to order for her to get started? She doesn’t really want a table, and rather that I build a base for it… I can build one, but will the machine work properly?
I saw in a video there is some knee lifter for the head, but also a second lifter behind the head. Is it necessary to have both?
Sorry for the surplus of questions. 😅

I just moved to a new area and need a new car so I went to the Honda dealer and went to test drive the Accord Hybrid. The car salesman seemed regular and then when we got into the car he insisted on sitting in the backseat. Within a minute he was passed out in the back seat. I ended up driving for like 15 minutes trying to figure out how to get back to the dealer. Once we got there he pretended like nothing happened and kept saying "I'm surprised you didn't have more questions." I asked him if he was tired and he acted confused. He didn't seem on drugs or too old so I'm not really sure what happened. I ended up buying the car, but not sure if it was a trauma response.

Hi Honda,
Rhonda the Honda has been off road for coming up on two years now. Life’s been busy, finally prioritizing bringing her back from the dead.
Engine seized up, had it towed back to the house and there she sat. Also, quick disclaimer, I’m not a hands on car person so please assume you’re sharing breadcrumbs or insights to someone with a base knowledge of zero.
I’ve been checking out car-part.com looking for engines. Checked out eBay a bit, here are some questions I had, and if there’s a good question that you would have in this situation please share anything so I can do valuable research.
What are some go-to sites when engine shopping? What are some online engine shopping pitfalls? What should be avoided when shopping for an engine? Is searching for long block engines beneficial, or does that bring into question the assembly of it? Because the engine will be out I figured things like clutch/radiatobelts/water pump (I think it has that) would be good to do, can anyone share a resource that covers a comprehensive list of anything else that should be replaced that might normally be overlooked?
What are some other questions I should have or things I should be researching?
Thank you kindly for any time, insights or information you’re able to share!

THE 2000 YEAR OLD MAN (1975) - FULL TRANSCRIPT 2000 Year Old Man is an old Brooks-Reiner comedy routine turned into a half-hour animated TV special. Reiner, a TV reporter, interviews Brooks, a man claiming to be 2000 years old. The interview consists of a serious of questions regarding the history of the world. Brooks' answers to Reiner's questions are priceless.
About four days ago a plane landed at Idlewild Airport.
The plane came from the Middle East bearing a man who claims to be
2000 years old.
He spent the last six days at the Mayo Clinic.
Ei, sir.
Sir, is it true that you are 2000 years old?
Oh boy.
-Yes. -You are?
It's hard to believe sir because
in the history of man nobody has ever lived more than 167 years
wich a man from Peru claimed to be.
But you claim to be 2000?
I'll be, not yet. I'll be 2000, October 16th.
You will be 2000. When were you born?
We didn't have formal years and names and writing.
We didn't know. I see.
Nobody kept time.
See, we didn't know.
We didn't write. We just sat around, pointed in the sky
and said wow hot there wow.
-That's all they said? -We didn't even know it was the sun.
You really didn't know anything.
Anything, we were so dumb.
We didn't know who was a lady.
-But they were... -They were with us.
But we didn't know who they was
we didn't know who was the ladies and who was fellows.
You thought they were just different type of fellows.
Yes, stronger or smaller or softer.
The softer ones I think was the ladies all the time.
What about that? How did you find out?
Well, they are cute, a fat guy,
could you could have mistaken him,
soft and cute.
Who is the person who discovered the female?
Bernie.
Who was Bernie?
Bernie, one of the first leaders of our group.

• And he discovered the female?
• Yeah.
  
• How did that happen?
  
• Ladies, ladies here.
  

I'm very interested to find out how Bernie discovered the woman.
-Well, he... -How did he come to find?
One morning
he got up smiling. So he said:
I think there is ladys here.
I said, well, what do you mean, you know?
He said: 'cause in the night.
I was swelled and delighted, see?
So he went into such a story that
it's hundreds of years later, I still blush.
Could you give us the secret of your longevity?
Well, the major thing.
The major thing.
Is that I never, ever touch ripe food.
I don't eat it.
I wouldn't look at it and I don't touch it.
And and I never run for a bus.
There's always another.
Even if even if you're late for work.
You know, I never run for a bus.
I never ran.
I just stroll, jump it, slowly walk to the next bus...
Yeah, well but there were no buses at the time.

• No, in my... -Right.

In my time ahnn...
What was the means of transportation then?
-Mostly fear.
-Fear transported you? -Fear yes.
You could see.
A lion, he would would growl, you would go two miles a minute.
I'd like to find out about some social customs
the origination of social customs.
For instance, singing how that started?
Oh it stems from fear.
-Could you explain? -Because in the old days,
I said old days.
I don't mean the georgian cars.
-Did you.. -I mean rocks and caves...
I'm asking you, sir, how song...
Some song came about when you really had to communicate.
-But in trouble you couldn't say help. -Yes.
But have to use your mouth.
Yes, I know.
Hello.
-I mean, I wouldn't say help, I say good morning.
Yes. You're really...
you know you in trouble.

• But somebody said eeeh eeeeh. -That was the first song.
  
• I don't know.
  
• In other words, fear, right?
  

I was singing.
We thought happiness did.
Oh, and the song came out of it.
A lion is eating my foot off.
Somebody call a cop.
A lion is eating my foot off.
Somebody call a cop.
A lion is eating my foot off.
Somebody call a cop.
A lion is eating my foot of
Somebody call a cop.
Very interesting to hear the derivation of songs
The first songs,
the first songs were all the anthem songs.
We always thought...
We always thought...
Wanna hear an anthem song?
You had an anthem song?
We had a national anthem.
-What was the anthem? -Well, ah...
you see, was only fragment...
-Fragment? -It wasn't a nation.
-Yes. -It was cave, each cave. Yes.
Each cave had a national anthem.
You remember the national anthem of your cave?
Ok. I say I'll never forget it.
You don't forget a national anthem in a minute.
Let them go to the hell
except cave 76.
For instance, how did the custom of two people shaking hands
how the handshake come to be?
The handshake? As you know...
I don't, that's why I'm asking!
The handshake has also stemmed from fear.

• Everything seems to stem from fear.
• Of course.

Everything we do is based on fear.
-Even love? -Mainly love.
How can love stem from fear?
How can love stem from fear?
What do you need a woman for?
You know what you need for?
-In my time? -Yes.
To see if an animal is behind yourself,
you had to get eyes in the back of your head.
you take two eyes that is to be a lady.
I see.
You say, lady, you look behind me for a while.
And that was the first... the first marriages.
What if you take a look behind me ok?
How long you want?Forever, we are married.
You walked back to back to the rest of your life?
Yes. You only look at her once in a while,
when you knew you it was safe?
When I knew I was in a highground.
-The handshakes they started how?
-They started to see if the fellow had a rock
or a dagger in his hand.
Where is you hand? Hi, Charlie.
How you're doing Jumpy, where is you hand?
Then you open it and you look...
And you shook another one.
And that's the way the handshakes started.
Yes, the shake.
May have a stone or a marble to stick in your eye.
In the older days
you should get a snap and all.
How the dancing started?
-Dancing is the same thing. -Fear again?
Just fear. The only thing you could do with a hand
was to see if there was a rock or a marble
or rubber band or nail or something that would stick in your head.
Right. Ok.
But while imobilizing my hand
dancing gets to complete the imobilization.
Dance and keep the feet busy so he can't get you.
Yes, but I think most people are interested
in living a long and fruitful life.
-You mentioned? -Fruit is good food, you mentioned.
Fruit kept me going for 140 years once
when I... was on a very strict diet,
mainly nectarines, I love that fruit
half a peach, half a plum, such a hell of a fruit.
It's not too cold
Not too hot, you know, just nice.
-What if... -A rotten one?
That's how much I love. I'd rather eat a rotten nectarine than a fine plum.
-What do you think about? -I can understand that.
Yes, that's how much I love them.
-Yes, I can understand, sir. -Some good things.
What did you do for a living?
Well, many years ago, thousands.
There was no heavy industry.
We know that.
Most things that we manufactured or we made,
most things we ever made,
was we would make a take a piece of wood
and rub it, rub it and rub it and rub it
then clean it and look at it and hit right with it
and hit a tree with it.
-For what purpose? -Just to keep busy.
There was not. There was absolutely nothing to do, had no job.
What other jobs were there?
Must've been something else besides hitting a tree with
the knowledge, hitting a tree with a
piece of stick was already a good job.
You couldn't get that job.
Mainly was sitting and looking in the sky
was a big job
and another job was watching each other.
-And what language did you speak? -They spoke...
-Rock, basic rock. -Years before Hebrew.
Yes. 200 years before Hebrew was the rock language, the rock talk.
Could you give us an example of that?
Hey, you don't put that rock on me.
Hey, what you do with the rock?
Do you remember you remember your Hebrew sir?
Yes, I would just I think I remember fluent...
Because I understand the modern Hebrew is different from the...

• Yes. The difference in some of the

-phonetic alliteration paterns. -Yes.
Can we hear an example of the ancient Hebrew?
A very ancient Hebrew is...
Oh, hi there, hello.
Hello there. How are you.
-Hi. How are you. -That's English.
-Oh wait, wait. -You remember any Hebrew?
Very little.
I don't think I remember.
I must have forgot a great deal of it.
-I think you forgot it all. -Maybe all, yes.
Maybe all. Thousands of years since I needed it.
Now, sir, did you ever...
Did you ever have any formal job as we know it today?
Yeah, well, I was a manufacturer. I was owner.
What kind of a factory did you have?
I had a I used to make the star of David, Jew stars.
Making a little money?
Where's that? Yeah.
Soon as religion came in, I was one of the first in that.
I figured this was a good thing.
How did you make them? Did you have tools?
Well, we didn't have a lady.
I employed six men each with a point.
They used to run together in the middle of the factory
A great speed, it was huge.
They were making a star.
Yes. We would make two a day because of the many accidents.
Six men running and... you know.
Lots of accidents.
You never thought of going into anything else?
Oh, no, I had an offer once.
-It came to me. Simon. -What Simon asked you to do?
Said he had a new thing, a new item,
a winner, looks like a winning item.
That was gonna be a big seller is called a cross.
And I looked at it and I turned it over
and looked in all sides of it
and I said, it's simple. It's too simple.
I didn't know then. Element.
-I didn't know with such a -You turned him down?
and I said, I'm sorry, but I'm too busy.
See, I could have I could have fired four men,
two men run together, bang, that is a cross.
Would say that I would I would have earned
over a hundred dollars doing that crosses and everything.
Yes, certainly.
Do you have a few moments, sir?
What do you mean? Money or the time.
No, we have to cut way for messages now.
-Okay, let's do it. Is it in English? -Yes.
By the way, sir, are you married?
I have been married several hundred times.
-Several hundred times? -Yes.
You haven't, man. Do you remember all your wives?
-One I remember well. -Which one was that?
The five one, Shyla.
I remeber her well.
I'm afraid to ask the next question, you had many hundreds of wives...
-Hundreds and hundreds. -But how many children you have?
I have over forty two thousand children.
And not one comes to visit me.
It's awful, sir
well, sir, it's really you mean to say there isn't one daughter...
there's many daughters, but, but they
you know how they are, children.
Good luck to them, let them go.
I don't want listen, let them be happy as long they're happy
I don't care. But they could send a note
write how're you Pop how you're doing Pop
you know, they don't.
Sir... ahn, you must have known
some great men in your time, you did travel to...
I knew the greater and the near greater.
Can I ask you about some of these...
Certainly, I'll tell you the true
the true whether I knew or not.
For instance, people are people are
very interested in somebody like Joan of Arc.
A lot has been written about her, we read a lot...
Aah what a kiss.
You knew Joan of Arc?
I went for her, damn it, I went for her.
Nowhere in history do we know of Joan going with it anybody.
Well, they don't print everything.
You did marry her? No.
No. I didn't marry her because she was on a mission.
she used to say to me
she used to say to me, I've got to save France.
I should say I look.
I've got to wash up. You save France.
See you later after you save France. I'll wash up, you know.
-How did you... -Hold it, I... yet.
How did you feel about her being burned at the stake?
Terrible.
I didn't I didn't know.
Sir, how about some of the legendary characters
who supposedly might have existed?
For instance, Robin Hood.
-Did he...? -Oh, yeah. Lovely man.
Ran around in the forest.
Did he really steal from the rich and give to the poor?
No, he didn't.
He stole from everybody and kept everything.
Out of the legend?
Out of the legend let's bring up that
he had a fellow monk, hired a press agent
running all the paper and roll and scroll.
He takes from the rich and gives to the poor, who knew?
You knew you took such a knock in the head
when he robbed you wouldn't knock him down.
-In other words... -A tough guy.
I hate to have our legendary figures smashed
Well, I hate do smashing for you.
So much to discuss, for instance,
-somebody like William Shakespeare -Oh what a pussycat.
-You are saying that you knew -A pussycat.
You did know it, for instance
Oh, that little beard, that cute hair...
He was reputed,
I guess you are agreeing that he was the greatest writer of all times.
Oh no, hey, hold up he was small.
What you mean? You just said he was great.
-Oh boy!
-And I said he was great... -No sir.
A cute man and a pussycat.
William Shakespeare was not a great writer?
Not good writer at all.
He wrote 37 of the greatest.
Shakespeare was not a good writer, no.
He wrote 37 of the greatest.
Would you ever see the original the first folios?
You mean they were edited by someone else?
Never mind the edit, did you see the folios?
No, I never saw them. Did you see?
I saw that folios, your wanna see how they are?
A blast...
A 'm' you know that look like a 'D'
an 'M' didn't look like an 'M'
I know that is a 'V'
Every letter was cockeyed and crazy.
Don't tell me he was a good writer.
The worst printmanship I ever saw in my life.
What he did? He did as it was reputed,
he did write 37 of the greatest plays of...
-38! -I only know 37.
Would you care to look at this list sir?
These items are listed come down to the ages.
-You know one that should be there? -Yes.
What's that?
Queen Alexandra and Morris.
Is there any copy of this unexistent?
This is a play that I put invested money in.
Probably the only one that didn't come to light.
Come to light and closed in Egypt.
Sir, you remember...
you remember any of the dialogue of Queen Alexandra and Morris?
Queen Alexandra turn to Morris and said:
Oh, Morris. What could it have been that I have seen?
Is it not in my marrow or we not have one on ourselves?
And he would say to her:
What are you hollering?
What are you hollering?
-Sir, what... -Wake up the whole castle, you know.
Sir, what did you do 2000 years ago to entertain...
-Walk and wing. -I want to know wether...
-Were there comedians -Oh sure sure, we had.
You remember any of the... 2,000 years ago...
A matter of days, let me see.
I remember one comedian gave us some laughs
while we were hysterical.
Well, who is he? Some good laughs.
Murray the Nut. He gave us a laugh.
A tiger came in the cave one afternoon.
Soothed in uninvited naturally.
Nobody asked how a tiger did walk in.
Tiger came in and Murray, you know, the joker
the tumbling, you know, the Nut
jumps at and grabs the tiger by the tail
yahaa, yahaa, yahaa...
and the tiger turn around and ate him in a minute.
and we get histerical laughing and laughing.
Best joke we ever had.
Oh sir, that's not very funny.
That was all we have, our chaos then that was all we have.
Terrible, I would consider that...
Have to pass me out, Murray took the tiger.
-That was entertainment? -Yes.
I would consider that in the realm of tragedy rather than comedy.
It's a point of view, to me tragedy is... is
if I cut my finger, that's tragedy.
It clinch and I cry and I run around
and I go into Mount Sinai for a day and a half.
I'm very nervous about.
And to me comedy is if you walk into an open sewer
and die, I like that.
Comedy I say.
-My finger is important. -Yes
In the 2000 years you've lived, you've seen a lot of items.
Certainly.
What is the biggest change you've seen?
In two thousand years the greatest thing mankind ever devised
I think in my humble opinion is saran wrap.
You can put a sandwich in it.
You can look through it. You can touch
you can put over your face and fool around and everything.
It's so cool you could wrap up
-You would ate it? -I love it,
put three olives in it and put a little one.
can put ten sandwiches and make up this.
-Whatever you want, It's clean and it sticks with.
-You equate this with... -You can look right through.
You equate this with man's discovery of space?
That was good, that was good.
-Sir, we ah... -Yes, yes.
We have to take time out for message now.
Why do you have to take time out?
You take the message, I'll keep talking.
That was a good message.
Well, sir, if we don't have too much more time
but we all here would like to know your code.
Well, alright, is this it?
A farewell? -A farewell address.
Hello there. This is 2000 years talking to you
from the depths of back there when we was
now I'm still and they not and I just want to say
keep your smile on your face.
And stay out of a Ferrari
or any small Italian car.
stay out of them. I wanna tell you that it's been
it's been a wonderful two thousand years
and you've been a wonderful civilization
and it's been a thrill living for 2,000 years
and eat a nectarine, is the best food ever made.

"Explain your past, Musa" the gov'ness walks at my right, shielding my from the piercing sun as we walks with the caravan. After the trench was dismantled, we are walking by foot to reach the capital, as the trench-line have been pushed far into our homeland.
"I was a cook when the war started, gov'ness" and now I am left wondering why did she chose me from anyone else in the caravan, there's the sergeant, the whom she asked to see earlier today.
"You have been trusted to cook rations for your company, as early as the war?" her baroque companion, similarly donned in her armor, walks close by ours, but never overtook us.
"No, gov'ness, I was a 10 years old when the war started, the war went for seven years and I fought for the last two" before she came, with weapons of the stars that could've decimate my trench instead of theirs
"Such a young man you are, seven years ago, the Emperor grants me audience, revealing that I was his progenitor"
This talk about an "imperium" across the stars and the deified emperor has gotten me worried. Is that her reason for talking to me, to ease my pain before sending me to the stars far from here? Or simply an act of pity?
The meager town came into view, and was it not for the ancient structure, we would've thought this was anywhere but the capital. Gray skies and beaten earth have become the synonym for the heart of Nagorow.
"I must say, this was not our expectation when your leader came into contact with my ship, begging for salvation" the gov'ness depart from me, and my instinct was to follow her, but who am I to her? And so I stay put and follow the rest of the caravan back to the main camp.
"You're lucky to have an audience with the Lady, runt" one of gov'ness' companion knocked me to the dirt, assuming that he's doing it out of spite and jealousy. I can see him walking to gov'ness
"I apologize for my companion's doing" another of gov'ness', as he extends his fingers that allowed me to stand to my feet "Lucius was indeed jealous, he was our best melee combatant and our Primarch haven't even bat an eye for him"
"Is that a rare thing?" Lucius and the gov'ness seems to enter the structure, doing their business there. I quickly glance at my watch, the gray sky seems to be forever, and it shows 1641. And I quickly look back at the gov'ness companion
"It is, perhaps Mother saw something within you, perhaps yours was interesting at the moment" the giant release his helmet, letting his bronze hair free from the confine "I am Rylanor, pleasure to meet you, Musa"
"As is mine, gov'nor"
The Sejm was delightful in seeing Fulgrim and her companions, as well as the news of the apparent victory on the frontlines. Such delight warrants them to spent their moneys on a grand feast right at the capital, inviting everyone within range to attend, with the guest of honor being the gov'ness herself.
"I would have thought you are with Mother, Musa" Rylanor brought two plates in his palm, the plate whom was enough for me was made miniscule by his hands, each contained meager food they could thrown
"Thanks, gov'nor" the feast gives us chair to sit, yet here I stand with him, outside of the building. Somehow the gov'nor chose to make a companion out of me, whilst gov'ness over there busy herself with her empire in the suns.
"I almost forgot what a food taste, Musa, back in the campaign, we would be served liquid ration with occasional starch" I took a look at him, and his plate was already cleaned
"You should try my cooking then, I cook better"
We let a simple laugh from the situation, from a soldier to another, from a human to another too. The door barges open and whom I thought to be Lucius emerge, escaping the feast.
"It's obnoxious inside, Rylanor, if you wish to see me, then don't, I'm heading to the nearest landing coordinate" and went he goes, somewhere place only he, gov'nor and gov'ness know. Something that I would not understand no matter how much gov'nor taught me.
"I have to agree with dear Lucius there" and speak of the gov'ness, and she shall came, looking at the horizon "they barely separate the nobility and the peasant"
I didn't mean to stare, but gov'ness wore something fine, something you'd see from paintings high in temple's ceiling, an ascendant of man. Looking carefully, it seems she wore old Nagorovian dress and modify it to suit her stature, or rather, her figure. She need not a corset, it seems.
"The food is delectable, Mother" Rylanor already took my plate without my knowing, something that I relent
"Every food is delectable when you are starved of them, dear Rylanor"
We all watched as a star suddenly rose at the horizon, perhaps something to do with Lucius and his departure. I suppose this is our future, being shackled by another uncaring emperor to fight the dangers of mankind.
"Say, Rylanor, but does that star seems approaching us?" and behind Lucius' ascend, a second star indeed looks as if its getting nearer. Just before I respond, nor gov'nor did for that matter, the air raid sirens blare and screech
"It is too late to dodge the missile, Mother, and I am the only one still wearing my armor, I would suggest taking a shield behind me" Rylanor easily stood and tower over us. I didn't even wait as I quickly take cover.
"Don't be ridiculous, Rylanor, these brutes couldn't even muster the technology to weaponize simple nuclear reaction" Rylanor didn't wait and cover me with his entire figure, and I just prayed that whatever nuclear is nor what reaction it cause would not be as devastating as I'd fear.
The moment of impact was blurry, but there was an apparent pain riddled to it, as the temperature rose akin to a sun blasting us with the heat. Like what was drilled into my head, I quickly wrap my entire face with anything, covering up the assuredly loud aftermath and the shrapnel flying around. I couldn't hear
And I wish I wouldn't hear
By the time the air around began to cool, my throat was hoarse, as if I have been shouting the entire time. It wasn't until I noticed the spasmic movement on my mouth that I realized, I have been barking around.
"At ease, gov'nor, at ease lads" I chanted
"It seems it was a nuclear explosion, Mother, albeit a primitive version of it" Rylanor seems to ignore my rant, addressing the gov'ness instead. He then release me, before coughing up liquids right at my face "apologies" he mumbles
"Be damned your humor, Rylanor" I hear the gov'ness, rasping in breath as I slowly gather my senses "Musa, you lived it seems" my eyes were blinking rapidly, due to the heat and the dust it caused "oh Rylanor, I apologized for your condition".
When my eyes fully recovered, I saw only desolation. No Man's Land was gentler than this, water and mud found refuge within them after all. But what I saw was beyond it, ruins and dry earth, trees and building charred, and people would likely evaporate. Peoples, on whom I was fighting with and fighting for, for two damned years. I couldn't take it anymore, first Maria and now this? Fate was far too cruel
Liquid barge through my mouth, followed close by every air in my lungs and waters in my eyes. There was no rythym, only that I was doing it in instinct, lying on all fours at the stairs near the gov'nor and gov'ness.
Only then did I brave to stand up, looking at them and the impact it caused. Gov'nor seems to be stuck in his place, unable to move as his hair rotted away and flesh melts to his armor. Now I understand why did he puke. The gov'ness was way less impacted, as her clothing burnt with the flesh on her skins, with her lying on her back.
"Cease your staring, Musa" she quickly commanded
"Yes ma'am" I quickly slap my cheek, a soldier need to finish his duties until the bitter end, and the enemy was no better after all "orders, gov'ness?"
"You're waiting for my orders?" she slowly sat herself, throwing out blood from her mouth while her arms sizzle and creates smoke "so it seems, help me get to one of landing coordinates" when she did sat, she saw her own legs, crushed from the debris of the railings and burnt to crisp "it seems I would have to relegate the matter of combat to you"
"Private Musa at the ready, gov'ness" so soon to serve this faraway empire, and my first duty is to escape the chaos that will ensue. And first, I need to find a cart or I will be carrying the giant on my back
"Musa, before you go" Rylanor rasp and wheeze as he reach for something, before he carved it with letters and numbers "you are familiar with latitudes and longitudes of your planet, I assume, and if not then you can ask Mother for direction" he gave me the knife, on which he have engraved numbers.
"And what will happen to you, gov'nor?" I took the knife and pocket it, then looking back at the gov'ness
"I will be fine, Musa, all I ask is that you deliver Mother there to the place, and rest assured that you will be awarded"
I ignore the last part, something about the futility in wealth and glory that I realized, living as a cook my entire life before becoming a soldier taught me that. I quickly strip my clothing, and though I have to face the cold soon, finding the gov'ness means of transportation is more valuable. I quickly wrapped the gov'ness legs with a shirt, then I cut another of my shirt into pieces before I wrapped it at her so I can carry her off, my suspender helped in holding her together too
"Something tells me I won't enjoy the journey" Fulgrim murmurs as she rest on my shoulder
"Be safe Mother, I pray that Musa will be sufficient to you"

Very wet conditions at times today, so a little bit scrappy.
Weideman - Did a pretty good job again in defence. Took some decent marks and defended reasonably well. With Reid and now Ridley back, It's tough to see him getting another shot with the seniors, but good to see him hit some kind of form, regardless.
Ridley - Feels so weird writing about him in a VFL report... He was exactly what you'd expect. Looked like he was going at about 75%, but was miles ahead of pretty much anyone else on the field. Had 19 disposals, a few marks and a couple of tackles, which is pretty incredible, considering he only played the first half on managed minutes. Worth noting was that he seemed to almost be playing the Martin role, running off half back and delivering through the midfield. Might play one more in the VFL to make sure his match fitness is all good, but signs are very positive.
Hayes - Appeared to play more of a lockdown defensive game, with Ridley and Reid doing a lot of the intercept work. Was as solid as ever and I couldn't really fault him on anything. He's just so consistently good down there.
Bryan - BOG by a country mile. Dominated the ruck contest, got involved around the ground, kicked 2 goals and had 15 clearances. If he's not in the AFL side soon, it won't be due to form.
Caddy - Another nice outing. Had 2 goals, but it was his competitiveness that really stood out to me today. Just throws himself into every contest. Had a couple of great moments where he dove into packs to shovel a handball out to a teammate. His pressure was up, too, and did well to take some strong marks in tricky conditions. He's been building some good form over the last couple of games.
Reid - Classy as ever. Had the ball slip through his hands going for marks when the conditions were pretty slippery, but was otherwise very good both defensively and offensively. His kicking is such a sight to see. For those checking the stat sheet, yes, he had 10 marks, but 3 or 4 of those were from us chipping the ball around in the backline at the end of the game. Still did really well in the air for most of the game, though.
Lual - I thought he had a really strong first half running the ball out of defence, but faded out after the long break. He might just need to build his fitness up to have that full game consistency.
Davey - Probably his quietest game so far. Just couldn't find his way into the game at all. It's a shame after his great performance last time around. Hopefully he'll bounce back next week.
Roberts - He was one of our best today. Did some good work in the contests and on the outside, where his ball use was nice and tidy. For a player with his class, he's not afraid to do some dirty work, which is fantastic to see.
Visentini - Every game he does some little things that impress me. He competes hard and has a happy knack for hitting the scoreboard. He's doing alright as Bryan's backup, and it will be interesting to see how he goes if he gets a chance to be the number 1 ruckman in the side.
Wanganeen - Fairly quiet again. His pressure was quite good, but just isn't doing enough right now. I'm not writing him off quite yet, but I'd hope that he lifts fairly significantly in the second half of the season.
Menzie - Like our other small forwards, he just struggled to get into the game. We ended up moving him onto the wing, in what I assume was an attempt to get him more involved. He did ok there, and pushed back to help the defenders out a few times, which was nice, but was still pretty quiet.
As far as the VFL guys go, Hately was arguably the pick of the bunch with his strong contested work and a couple of goals. Peris wouldn't be far behind, though, as a speedy, classier sort of midfielder (his 12 tackles really stood out). Scott and O'Neill were both solid contributors, too.

My front tyre looks flat-ish but when my partner has checked the tyre pressure he’s had to pump it up for like 2 seconds and it’s done! (Neither of us know about cars) So basically what I’m saying is, if the pressure is ok but the tyre looks flat-ish is it ok to drive? Or is there another issue?

(F30)
C'est long et c'est juste du ouin ouin sur ma "vie de couple" pour me vider la tête, parce que je sature là.
J'ai 30 ans, je vis depuis 4 ans dans une ville où je ne connais absolument personne (sauf mon ex maboule), ma famille habite dans d'autres régions à travers la France, et les amies du lycée à qui je parle encore carrément dans d'autres pays. Je n'ai pas réussi à entretenir les liens avec mes collègues dans tous mes CDD, soit qu'elles aient 20 ans de plus que moi, soient qu'elles habitent assez loin (j'ai pas mal déménagé).
J'ai toujours été en couple, de mes 19 à mes 29 ans, et depuis 1 an avec un autre homme. Sans jamais vivre avec l'un ou l'autre.
J'ai toujours idéalisé le couple, du moins j'imagine parce que ça ne ressemble jamais à ce que j'aimerai : deux personnes qui avancent ensemble. Au quotidien je suis aussi seule en couple que si j'étais célibataire. Avec mon ex, de très mauvaise constitution, on ne pouvait rien faire, seulement parler, en live ou par message. Aucune activité, jamais. "Tu veux faire un truc ? Ben tu peux le faire toute seule, t'es libre." Un peu oui, mais tout le temps c'est la notion 0 du partage en couple à mon sens, mais je suis peut-être folle. Avec mon copain actuel, il y a les bons moments qu'on passe ensemble, et "c'est tout" (c'est déjà énorme car quand on se voit il est adorable, je sais que ça pourrait être bien pire). Une fois rentré chez soi c'est chacun sa vie. J'attends depuis 4 jours une réponse de sa part pour une soirée, on n'a aucune conversation légère par téléphone juste pour se parler, ça porte toujours sur un sujet précis et quand c'est réglé il disparait sans dire au revoir, sans répondre à mon dernier message. A chaque fois.
Et dans les deux cas, personne ne veut s'engager. Personne n'est là pour m'aider quand j'ai une galère, pour me soutenir au quotidien, pour me faire participer à sa vie (le premier j'étais là pour régler ses énormes galères d'argent et c'est tout, le second ne veut même pas que je l'aide à planter un clou chez lui quand il refait toute sa maison). Quand je commence à parler de ma solitude, du fait que pour moi un couple c'est censé aider là dessus, les réponses sont les mêmes : "Tu sais moi je suis très libre, très indépendant, ma liberté chérie, ma vie à moi".
Et je ne parle pourtant pas d'être H24 ensemble, quand mon copain part 1 mois en vacance entre potes je suis contente pour lui, quand il se fait des soirées entre potes je suis contente pour lui, quand mon ex me prévenait que pendant 1 semaine il voulait être coupé du monde car trop malade ou juste envie il n'y avait pas de problème.
Mais en attendant moi j'ai une vie de célibataire alors que je suis en couple, mon copain actuel ne semble pas comprendre ou prendre en considération à quel point je suis seule. Et je leur ai dit, dès le début, à chaque fois "Je suis très seule, moi je veux un partenaire de vie". "Oui mais tu comprends ma liberté, mais par contre me quitte pas, je t'aime je t'adore, reste avec moi". L'intérêt ?
Bref, je suis en couple depuis 11 ans non stop et je suis aussi seule que quand j'étais au lycée, cloîtrée chez moi à cause de la dépression (que j'ai surmonté, donc le problème n'est pas là).
Est-ce que j'idéalise le couple ? Est-ce que personne n'a un quotidien joyeux et du soutien quand il est en couple, c'est normal d'avoir des vies absolument et totalement séparées comme ça et je suis à la recherche d'une illusion délirante ? C'est normal de ne parler à personne pendant 5 jours quand on a un petit ami ?
Je suis désolée, c'est totalement décousu, j'avais juste besoin de m'exprimer un peu. ça fait des années que j'essaye de supporter ma solitude et que je me dis qu'un jour quelqu'un aura bien envie d'avancer à mes côtés mais je commence à perdre espoir là. S'en est à un point où j'ai même envie de rompre puisque je ne vois pas l'intérêt d'être dans un couple exclusif. Et je sais que je suis injuste, parce que mon travail et la distance nous empêche de passer 1 seule journée ensemble depuis 2 mois avec mon copain et je dois commencer à en avoir gros s'en m'en rendre compte. ça n'excuse en rien le fait qu'il mette des heures à me répondre à Chaque Fois, que je sois toujours la première à lui envoyer un message, qu'il me laisse en vu dès qu'il considère que la conversation est terminée. Ou qu'il prévoit de me voir 6 jours au mois de juillet alors que je lui ai dit clairement que j'avais refusé un poste JUSTEMENT pour qu'on puisse ENFIN passer du temps ensemble durant ce mois-là. Je ne pensais pas qu'après 3 mois (oui il reste encore 1 mois sans qu'on puisse se voir) son envie de me voir se limite à 6 jours, au détriment de ma vie professionnelle, parce qu'après il a immédiatement prévu de partir en vacances avec ses amis (je l'avais prévenu bien avant qu'il s'organise que je serai disponible ce mois-ci)
Encore une fois c'est peut-être moi qui délire, mais je pensais qu'en couple, quand on pouvait avoir 1 mois de vacances ensemble après 3 mois d'absence on sautait sur l'occasion. Quel intérêt à me dire que c'est vraiment pas marrant de ne pas me voir, qu'on va "passer du temps ensemble en juillet, j'ai hâte !" pour finalement me donner des miettes ? Si c'est ça un couple, je vais le dire, ça pue la merde et je ne vois pas à quoi ça me sert d'être exclusive (il avait parlé de couple libre. Evidemment uniquement sexuellement, parce que "qu'est-ce que tu ferais de plus avec un autre homme en dehors du sexe ?" Je sais pas, comme ça je dirai PARTAGER, ECHANGER).
Désolée de vous avoir infligé la lecture de ma vie pathétique, je crois que j'en ai gros. Je ne fondais pas "tous mes espoirs" sur lui, mais je pensais avoir enfin une vraie relation de couple après 10 ans de rien du tout et rebelotte à 30 ans. ça doit être la déception qui me rend amère, c'est pas jolie jolie...
Quoi qu'il en soit je vous souhaite une très bonne journée à tous, meilleure que la mienne !

Sorry ,English is not my first language.So for context , me (16F) and my mother we don't have the bests of relationship and since I've hit puberty, I've come to notice that my mother treats me differently than my brothers (22M and 25M ). She always blames me for her wrong decision, for every fight in our household. She always says that I'll never be like her (not that I want to be) , she always says that my brothers are her favourite because they do everything for her which is not true. In the priority list of my mother my brothers come first and I'm the last which is fine and I'm used to it but when i see the blatant favouritism i just can't help but call her out on it and she always denies it . I remember when i was in 4th grade and was developing, she told me to put hot tortilla's on my chest so my breast would flatten down (idk if it was true or not but it was ridiculous to say the least) and when i got my period she wasn't home at that time and i was 11 so when she came back she noticed red stains on my skirt and handed me a pad without any explanation and when i asked her what it is she said " Haven't you seen the ad" . She never told me about womenhood or femminity instead she was repulsed by it even though she is a woman too. She would warn me not to touch her when i was on my period and when I'd get seriously bad cramps she'd say "it happens" but not when it's her's. She used to disappear for month's saying she didn't wanted to live with us but when she came back all the sadness would also come back . She thinks everyone is talking about her behind her back and she blames me for it and goes on to give me a silent treatment which only she can break ( like when she FEELS like talking) . She makes me spy on my brother to listen if and what is he talking about her and report back to her and that kinda creates issues with me and my oldest brother. She always forcefully includes me in her n my father's fights and when i say something she goes on to blame me for her fights and everything she's ever done . She regularly makes vile comments about my body ( I'm kinda chubby) and proceeds to compare me to herself. She kinda thinks that I'm fighting for my father's affection with her so she humiliates me in front of my father because it's 'Funny'. Her moods changes every second, she screams at me whenever she wants , she'll say anything she wants to and i can't say anything or the fight would escalate. I'm so tired TBH and i have thoughts of killing myself just to get out of this house. She's never had a professional diagnosis so I'm not sure what is wrong with her . Is she really a narcissistic?

Hi,
I've had this issue with this headset since I Purchased it, it was second hand I believe from Amazon but was a good over a year ago and I've had the issue few months after purchasing it.
So i'll be using it without any issues, chatting with friends and such and then it will stop working and I'll be talking, but windows isn't picking up any input. The only way which seems to resolve it (temporarily) is to disable the mic in sound options and then reenable it and then it's working. It sometimes will work for an hour, or a few and then it will happen again. I've also known it to not happen for a whole day and forget that I even have the issue.
I thought it might be Windows, so I have since done a complete new install of Windows and have the same issue. I've had GameDAC headset previously so this is my first pair of wireless pro's. Just not sure if someone has a fix for this as no longer in warranty and I'm not sure if I want to buy a newer pair to potentially have the same issue and hassle of doing a return. Thanks!
Windows 11 23H2 but was the same for 21H2 and 22H2 (def latter) I think.

Biker brothers of reddit, I am looking to buy a second hand bike in 150-160cc segment.
The bikes I shortlisted for this are:

• RTR 160 4V
• NS160 2023 (with dual ABS)
• FZ v3

In the past two weeks, I have looked at a lot of bikes, and none of them felt right. But today, I tested an NS 160 and found it buttery smooth. There are no scratches, NONE. Not even in the leg guard or the rails. The engine looks and sounds smooth AF. The major caveat is the ODO meter is reset. At max, it is 10 months old (because that's when the bike launched here and the lot number is 144). The price they are quoting is 280k.
What do you guys suggest? What should I go with? And if I am to buy, what are the things I need to consider when looking for 2nd hand bikes?
Also, if ya'll got any leads for your recommendations in this segment, do drop them!

I applied for comp sci, no co op. don't ask why i said no co-op, i was stupid.
Essentially, my home life is pretty hectic since I have a paralyzed parent and younger sibling, so I honestly do not want to live at home while also doing something as heavy as computer science. They basically make me do all the work lol. I also can't drive (no license), and I don't think I'm even legally allowed to drive whenever I have a migraine. I have chronic migraine disorder, so this happens more than I'd like.
Basically, most of the unis that have accepted me are about 30 minutes away. My parents said they'd pay for residence first year, but I would have to live at home for the other 3 years. Money is not an issue, they just feel like I should spend it on something better like a car. I even offered to pay, but their issue is that it seems like a waste since it's so close.
So I'm debating if I should go to a close university and just transfer to a farther university after second year? Only problem is I would obviously have to reapply, and with something as completive as comp. sci. idk how great that will turn out for me. I'm also worried I'd make too many friends or like the school too and not want to transfer lol.
My other option is to go to uottawa which is 4 hours away, but I literally know no one there and my intention was never to travel THAT far. Is the school good? People there nice? It's tempting to go there to be away from my family, but I feel like I should get outside perspectives because I impulsively make a decision to go there.

I decided to (re)watch every single DiP episode from season 1 to season 13, including the 3 Christmas specials, and to make an Excel file compiling fun stats about the show. Here's the gist (and please excuse any mistakes as English is not my mother tongue):

General statistics

• Men are most likely to be killed (71 out of 113 victims are men), but also to kill (62 out of 107 murderers are men).
• So it makes sense that most murders are a man killing a man (45 times). The most frequent configuration is then a woman killing a man (27), followed by a man killing a woman (22) and finally a woman killing a woman (20).

Methods of murder

• Saint Marie murderers have a soft spot for firearms (32).
• Bladed weapons (i.e. knives, machetes, ice picks, spears, scissors and needles) were used 24 times.
• 21 victims were killed by poison/overdose.
• 8 fell to their deaths.
• 8 were strangled.
• 6 were asphyxied (most of the times with a pillow).
• 6 were struck with a blunt object (including a pole, a paperweight, a statuette, a golf club and a handle).
• 3 were electrocuted.
• 2 were drowned.
• 2 had an allergic reaction caused by the murderer.
• 1 was harpooned.

Motives

• Most of the time (26), you kill to prevent the victim to reveal something incriminating about you.
• Revenge is a pretty common motive as well (24), especially in more recent seasons.
• 19 murders were motivated by money, 18 by love.
• 14 murders were committed to protect a loved one, a place the murderer enjoyed, or a business in which he was involved.
• 4 victims were killed to put an end to their abuse of the murderer (mainly blackmail).
• 3 murders were ordered by another person.
• 2 murders were mistakes by the murderer, who originally wanted to kill someone else.
• 2 murders were committed to make it appear that the victim was guilty of a previous crime and committed suicide out of guilt.
• Shoutout to the one crime that was committed purely gratuitously.

Who gets the most killed?

• You're most at risk of being killed by your colleague or business partner, as was the case for 22 unfortunate people.
• 13 murderers killed their bosses or people above them in the hierarchy.
• 12 killed their friends.
• 11 killed their customers.
• 9 killed their fathers.
• 5 wives killed their husbands and 4 husbands killed their wives.
• 3 murderers killed their employees or people below them in the hierarchy; 3 killed their exes and 3 killed their brothers.
• 2 killed their girlfriends; 2 killed their brothers-in-law, 2 killed their mothers-in-law.
• On the other hand, if you suspect that the guy who has a crush on you, your brother-in-law, nephew, daughter or girlfriend is up to no good, you can usually sleep soundly (1 murder for each).

Which occupation is the deadliest?

Well, besides simple resident (26) and tourist (10), the deadliest job on Saint Marie is businessman/woman (8). Singers (5) and police officers (4) are also quite threatened.
Speaking of coincidences, note that 2 brides were killed on their wedding day, 2 prisoners were killed by their prison guard, and 2 survival coaches were killed by someone close to them.

Recurring tropes

The Saint Marie police had to deal with 71 seemingly impossible murders (i.e. a murder in a closed room and/or a murder where all the suspects were together at the time of the murder). 51 times, the DI has solved this case with the help of a completely innocuous event.
13 murders were committed with direct complicity (including 4 with the complicity of 2 or more people). 12 murders were disguised as suicides, 4 as accidents, 3 as burglaries gone wrong. 4 deaths were actually suicides made to look like murders.
On the fun side, in 5 different cases, the victim wanted to stage their own murder in order to disappear and start a new life, but was killed anyway.

How did the killer fake their alibi?

Most of the time, the murder took place earlier than previously thought (23), notably because the culprit or an accomplice posed as the victim after the murder (9) or because the gunshot heard was not actually the one that killed the victim (5).
20 murders took place elsewhere than previously thought. In 8 cases, it's because the victim had time to move before succumbing.
16 murders took place later than previously thought, mostly because the victim as first discovered was not actually dead, and the murderer killed them afterwards (9), or because there was a second gunshot after the murder (7).
In 10 different cases, the poison was not where it was thought to be.
I'd like to note the inventiveness of Sainte Marie's murderers when it comes to blocking a door from the inside: among other strokes of genius, they've already used a towel, a bottle cap, a fork and chewing gum to obstruct a door.

Character stats

1. Obviously, officer Dwayne Myers holds the record for number of episodes (60), excluding Catherine, the commissionner and Harry.
2. JP is the 2nd longest-serving character in the show, with 52 episodes.
3. Florence appeared in 49 episodes (46 as a DS and 3 as an officer).
4. Neville appeared in 39 episodes, making him the longest-serving DI.
5. Marlon: 31
6. Humphrey: 30
7. Camille: 28
8. Naomi: 26 (21 as a DS and 5 as an officer)
9. Fidel: 24
10. Jack: 22
11. Darlene: 21
12. Richard: 16
13. Ruby: 15
14. Madeleine: 10.

I hope you've enjoyed these little fun facts! I'll keep my stats updated with the next seasons.
(Please note that these statistics only apply to murders seen directly in the episode. I have not taken into account murders that take place chronologically before the episode.)