First Prev [Next]

Chapter 15: For What You’ve Tamed
“We’ve come a long way, Vikri. Let’s finish your story,” Rayner said as he sat down in the same chair, crossing his legs in the same way.; small consistencies that made the task of talking about my past seem a little more routine. “I understand you lost someone important to you that day.”
I shifted slightly where I sat. “Yeah,” I answered coarsely. I grabbed at the poncho hanging over my shoulders. I remembered what it felt like in my dreams. Radiant warmth always seemed to emanate from it. Not necessarily the poncho itself, but Tenga’s memory. I realized that as long as I had those, then he was still here in a way. I’d much rather have him here than his memory though.
Rayner nodded. “I know what that’s like,” he said in a near whisper.
I shook my head. “It’s not just that I lost him. I…I failed,” I rasped. “I could’ve saved him. Maybe if I’d gone back I could’ve gotten the equipment before the fire did. I was too afraid.”
Rayner nodded slowly. “And now you feel responsible.”
I remained silent as I clutched my tail on the couch beside me. Rayner already knew the answer. He pursed his lips. “Yeah…I know exactly how that feels.”
I looked up at him. For the first time, his eyes weren’t on me, but on the adjacent wall as he seemed to ponder something. “You think about all the things you could have done differently. Things that are so obvious in hindsight,” he sighed and adjusted his glasses. “If only it were that clear in the moment.” He looked up at me, clasping his hands together. “So walk me through what happened.”
I could still vividly remember the moment Tenga got shot. Everything happened in the blink of an eye. So quickly in fact, that it even took Tenga a moment to realize there was a hole in his torso. Minutes of continuous tension shattered with a hail of gunfire lasting less than a second. The echoes continued to howl through the mountains long after the bodies met the snow. My friend was fatally wounded, the snow around him dyed bright red with his blood. And I had to leave him.
The entire time I was in the belly of the federation destroyer with danger lurking around every corner, all I wanted to do was to get this done as quickly as possible and get back to him. I was enraged that they’d done this to him and to billions just like him.
“Tenga was all I thought about the entire time,” I croaked. “And I…I was willing to kill everyone onboard to get back to him, even if there was no way I ever could. I… did things I could never have imagined myself doing even just days ago. I tore a chunk out of my leg just to be able to get to the Krakotl pinning me down with a crowbar.” I inhaled deeply, staring down at my reflection in the water, recalling my bloodshot eyes in the reflection of the ship's monitor. The grimly colorful bloodstains in my fur from several different species.
Rayner nodded. “It was a desperate situation. Many don’t see themselves doing things like that until they’re put in a situation where it's necessary. A situation where it's do or die. No one can fault you for that, especially not with all that depended on you.”
“I guess I just…It’s just worrying knowing that there’s a part of me capable of that.”
The doctor tapped his pen on his notepad as he seemed to think for a moment. “Do you worry that you may have violent outbursts?”
I scoffed. “Well, the events of a few days ago provided good grounds for worry.”
Rayner nodded. “Aggression is common for PTSD victims. It can be difficult to manage intense emotions when your mind is already dealing with so much.
I shook my head. “That’s not the person I want to be.”
Rayner nodded. “I know Vikri. That’s why it's so crucial for you to talk about this stuff. The less all of this weighs on you, the better you’ll be able to control those emotions when they arise.”
He finished writing on his notepad before taking off his glasses and leaning forward slightly. “So what happened to Tenga?”
The question made my heart sink. My mind went quiet. The second hand of time sounded like the footsteps of a giant marching toward…something. My body seemed to go cold and numb. “He died…” I croaked, staring down at the table. That was the first time I’d admitted that to myself verbally in such a direct way. “And I tried so hard,” I choked, tears now streaming down my face. “I did everything in my power to save him. I even put Querek’s life in danger.”
I felt the heat. I could feel cold water dripping from my paws as the burning ship melted the frost accumulating in my fur. I remembered the terrifying hopelessness that gripped me as I gripped Querek and pushed him into the snow. He tried to sacrifice himself for Tenga. What if I had let him? Would it have even worked? Could Tenga accept that?
I recalled the story to Rayner, battling to keep my composure. “I…I watched him die,” I choked. “And I was furious. Reese had to pull me off of him. I wanted to do…something, anything, but…he told them not to bring him back. I think he…” I winced at the thought of him considering this. “I think he’d rather have died sacrificing himself over…going rabid.”
Silence perforated the room for what felt like several long minutes. Rayner sat with his legs crossed, his hand propped up against his mouth. He seemed to become lost in thought for a moment before speaking. “I know how that guilt feels,” he admitted quietly.
I looked at him, somewhat surprised. “You do?”
Rayner nodded, rubbing his hands together. “My son,” he said plainly, taking a long pause before he continued. “He and Jesse were very close as kids. Practically brothers.” He tapped on his clipboard with his pen. “I was…not so available in those days. I was a very different man than I am now. I was still in school. I was always busy, always stressed. I hadn't even considered becoming a therapist. I was deadset on becoming a neurosurgeon.” He scoffed at himself, his head gently shaking back and forth as his gaze grew distant. His delivery lacked that matter-of-fact candor I was so used to by now. He was much quieter; less animated. His eye contact was sporadic and he never stopped fidgeting with his pen. Everything about him seemed suddenly mired in an emotion that was difficult to read. That was when I saw everything we'd done over the past few days for what it really was. Rayner wasn't invincible. He never claimed to be. He was hurt; I could hear it in his voice. He wasn't a person reaching down into the mud and yanking me out by the nape of the neck. He was man covered in mud himself. He wasn't an untouchable hero. Merely a guide.
He continued as that realization struck me. “I loved him as much as a father could. But I was so busy that…well I wasn't there as much as I'd like to have been. That put a big strain on our relationship.” He removed his glasses and wiped the lenses a few times before he continued. “One night we got into an argument. He’d just gotten his license. He had an old beat-up car I'd bought him for his birthday,” he chuffed. “A teen’s first car is always…eccentric. Thought it was a great deal at the time.” He sighed and nodded slightly before continuing. “He left the house enraged, speeding down the road. After a few miles, he lost control, swerved off the road, and hit a tree head-on. The airbag never deployed. The car crumpled like a soda can.”
I stared at him, speechless as he concluded in a near-whisper. “He was declared dead at the scene.”
The room felt hollow for a few long seconds. I searched for a reply but couldn't fathom the right words to say. Fortunately, Rayner didn't stay silent for long. “Like you, I blamed myself for a long…long time.” He sighed. “And it nearly destroyed me.”
I stared at the floor, fidgeting with my tail. “How did you…overcome that?”
“Well it didn't happen overnight,” he replied, flashing a brief smile. “It takes time but, at some point, you have to carry on living. You have to continue loving.” His eyes creased slightly as he looked down at his own hands. “You have to keep loving,” he repeated in a low whisper.
Loud silence claimed the room again as his words sank in. He was right. It was either accept what happened or live like this forever. Looking at it that pragmatically, the choice seemed easy. Emotions are never so logical though. It wasn’t as if he relieved himself of that burden either, it was obvious he still carried it. It just…didn’t weigh as much now. Not because it got lighter, but because he got stronger. I eased into speaking again. “I…I'm sorry. About your son.”
Rayner nodded. “I'm sorry about your friend.”
We both stewed in silence for a minute before Rayner spoke up. “We’ll send you home today.”
“You…really think I’m ready?”
Rayner nodded slowly. “I think so. The medication seems to be working, you haven’t had any breakdowns since you’ve been here. You’ve gotten much better at discussing these things. I think you’re equipped to face this now.”
“...I’m afraid,” I croaked.
“Of what?” Rayner asked, leaning forward
“Of…seeing Lucky again. I'm doubting whether I even should. I was never prepared to be her master. I’m just a danger to her.”
“Vikri,” Rayner exhaled and leaned forward. “You made a mistake. We all do. But you have a responsibility to her. You should at least see her and face that mistake, or you’ll never have closure. What you decide after that is your choice, but I don’t think it’ll be as bad as you think.”
“I hope so,” I sighed.
Rayner clicked his pen and set his notepad aside. “We’ve made you some medication to take home, same stuff you've been taking. The plan is to keep lowering the dosage until you’re sleeping without it. We’ve made you some sheets with all the daily doses on them and when to take each one. It’s enough to last you two weeks, then once they’re out, you’ll come back here for another session, then if you need it, we’ll get you more and keep weaning you off them.”
He leaned forward, emphasizing his next words. “And I cannot recommend enough that you go to Jesse’s support group in between our meetings. Those will help you tremendously, I’m sure of it.”
I nodded. “I have his number. I’ll…I’ll give it a shot.”
“You won't regret it,” Rayner assured me. “Jesse was in the same chair as you not too long ago for similar reasons. He has knowledge from first-hand experience. I can vouch for him, he’s a great guy.” He inhaled. “Well, is there anything else Vikri? We won’t be seeing each other again for a while, so if there’s anything else, now’s the time to talk about it.”
I thought for a second. We’d covered almost everything. I’d never discussed those days in so much detail. It felt like being submerged in icy water. It was miserable at first, but over time it became easier, even comfortable. I’d relived so much pain over the last three days, but here at the end of the whole story, It felt less like a nightmare, and more like reality. “No, I don’t think so,” I finally replied.
“Then I’ll clear you to go home. Andrea is here, she’ll give you a ride, I’m sure. Here.” He reached over and handed me a small business card. “That has all my contact information on it. I’m usually here in my office until late at night, so feel free to call if you need anything. If the sedative gives you any issues at all, any side effects, make sure to call and let me know. We followed the recipe to a tee, but it’s wise to be cautious.”
A familiar silence flooded the room as Rayner and I seemed to, for the first time, have nothing left to say. Finally, the doctor spoke. “See you in two weeks, Vikri.”
///////////////////////////////
Golden strands of light danced between the digits of my paw as I moved it in front of the brilliant summer sun. An intense beacon of warmth floating in a sky as blue as Earth’s oceans. The rumble of Andy’s car occupied the air as we cruised down the highway. Vivri was sound asleep in the backseat. The gentle white noise and vibration seemed to knock her out cold. I watched the sunrays dance as I waved my paw in front of me, before turning it around. Several spots on my paw still had obvious scars. I even still had burn scars from the electrical systems aboard the crumbling Cardinal.
I curled my paw closed into a fist and rested my head against it, watching the lush, green mountains pass by in the distance. After three days I was set loose into the world once again, hopefully better armed than I was before. Even after all the weight I doffed from my shoulders in Rayner’s office, a crushing mass still rested on my chest. Lucky.
The weight only became heavier as the car slowed, and rounded a corner into the parking lot of a large animal hospital. Andy gently brought the car to a stop in a parking space in front of the entrance. Occasionally people would walk in and out with their pets, many of which were dogs on leashes.
Vivri stirred awake after we stopped. “Oh…We’re here,” she muttered nervously. “There’s…a lot more animals here than I was expecting.”
Andy chuckled. “It’s an animal hospital girl, there’s gonna be all kinds of critters here.”
I turned around to face her. “You don’t have to go in there. You and Andy can wait here.”
Andy scoffed. “You might wanna tell Rayner they screwed up those meds, ‘cause you’re delusional if you think I’m letting you go in there by yourself.”
“Well I don’t want her to be alone out here,” I argued.
“I’ll go in, just…stay close, please?” Vivri interjected.
I looked back at her, ears tilted. She was dead serious. I sighed and shook my head. “This is gonna be a disaster,” I groaned.
Andy opened her door. “I’ll wait with her in the lobby, you go talk to the vets. It’ll be fine.”
I looked back at Vivri one last time as Andy stepped out. “Alright, just stay away from the cats.” I opened my door and began stepping out into the summer air.
“C-cats?”
“Small felines. They're demons with mind control,” I replied just before closing the door.
Vivri scrambled out of the car and followed right on my heels. “Well don’t just leave me!” she squeaked.
I laughed. “I’m kidding. Well, mostly.”
Walking into the building, I realized that Lucky had been in a very similar place as me over the past three days. The lobby felt eerily similar to the one at the medical center. Everything went silent as Vivri and I walked in. Immediately I could feel dozens of eyes on us. Vivri hid close behind me as Andy gestured for me to follow her to the desk.
I doubted any of the humans there meant any harm, but dozens of binocular eyes snapping onto her in an instant had Vivri more unsettled than she already was. It didn’t help that several dogs were either on leashes or in carriers in the lobby, which were no doubt just as curious. I grabbed Viv’s paw. “They don't see many Venlil,” I whispered. “Just ignore them.”
I approached the desk with Vivri still hiding behind me. “E-excuse me?” I stuttered. The woman at the desk looked up, clearly caught off guard by two venlil standing before her. “O-oh! Excuse me, you must be Lucky’s owner, right?”
“Yeah. Vikri.” I could feel Vivri shivering behind me.
“I’ll let Doctor Gavin know you’re here.”
“Thanks,” I muttered before turning to Vivri. “Are you sure about this?” I whispered.
“Of course! It’s just for a few minutes, right?” Her body language gave an entirely different answer. She seemed like she might faint at any moment.
I looked up at Andy. “Keep her close, would you?”
Andy wrapped her arms over Viv’s shoulders. “Of course. I’ll keep little Vivi safe from all the big, bad puppy dogs and mean kitties,” she said in baby speak, twisting her side to side. She giggled. “We’ll be fine.” Her tone suddenly shifted as she locked eyes with me. “Will you?”
I stood there in silence for a moment. This entire time my heart felt unbearably heavy. Standing there, I felt nauseous. So much so that I made it a point to know exactly where the bathroom was when I walked in. The weight on my chest made breathing a laborious task. I heaved in a deep breath. “I don’t know,” I admitted. “I don’t know what’s going to happen in there but…I have to do this. For both of us.”
Andy exhaled and nodded, seemingly just as nervous for me. Right on cue, the door at the back of the room opened with a heavy click. “Vikri?” a male voice called out. An older gentleman in burgundy scrubs surveyed the room. It didn’t take long for him to find me. He nodded toward me as he adjusted his glasses. “Right this way, please.”
“We’ll be right here,” Andy whispered, her hands still resting around Viv’s shoulders, who agreed with a tail flick.
I nodded and walked toward the man, leaving the cozy waiting room behind, and entering a long, sterile hallway. The doctor’s shoes clicked against the tile as he walked just in front of me. The weight bearing down on my chest only got heavier with each step. After a few agonizing seconds, the man finally spoke up as he stopped outside a door. “I’m Doctor Gavin,” he said breathily, extending a hand. “I performed Lucky’s surgery.”
I took his hand with my paw, which he could no doubt tell was trembling by this point. “Vikri,” I choked. “S-so…How is she?”
“She’s good,” Gavin answered in a higher pitch. “She’s recovering remarkably fast. Really lived up to her name.” He opened the door and stepped through into a kennel area as he continued. “The bullet hit one of her ribs and shattered. A couple of fragments pierced her lung, one of them was just inches from her heart. There’re still a few very small ones lodged in her tissue, but we’d be doing more harm than good by trying to remove them. They shouldn’t cause any issues and come out on their own after some time, but we’ll keep track of them with x-rays.”
As he spoke we passed by kennels, some empty, some with dogs that barked or jumped up on the cage as we passed. I scoured each one for Lucky, my dread building with each one we passed. Suddenly, the doctor stopped in front of me. He inhaled deeply. “I should mention…Given the…circumstances of how she got these injuries, me and some staff will stay with you just in case she becomes aggressive. That’s not to say that I think she will,” he added hastily, “she’s been great with everyone here but…you know, just to be safe.”
“I get it,” I breathed. It made sense. If Lucky attacked me, it would be far more deadly than it would be for a human. And I was confident even a human wouldn’t last long against a half-wolf her size. Fittingly, a group of four humans were gathered at the end of the hallway, catchers in hand.
Time seemed to slow as I approached the pen. The staff members all looked over at me with the same anxious expression. I felt like a prisoner walking toward my judgment, and that perhaps it was me that belonged behind these cages. I swallowed and took a long, slow breath as Gavin opened the gate. He walked in ahead of me. “Hey there big girl,” he said in a chipper tone. I heard the familiar thumping of Lucky’s tail against the floor. Gavin chuckled to himself as the remaining four staff calmly and quietly filed into the pen. Once they were all inside, the final human leaned around the corner, looked me in the eyes for a long second, and nodded once.
A new reality awaited around that corner. My sentence was about to be read. It felt so cripplingly helpless; wanting so desperately to finally be reunited with my best friend, yet trembling at the thought of rounding a corner to run face-first into the consequences of my actions. I steeled myself one last time. I nodded back at the catcher and took slow, deliberate steps toward him. I finally rounded the corner, and for the first time since the incident, I saw Lucky.
She lay on a large, fabric bed, with food and water bowls close by. Her right front leg was bound in a cast, tied up close to her body. A large patch of fur had been shaved away around her chest and halfway up her neck. She seemed thinner than I remembered. It reminded me of the scared, hungry pup I’d met so long ago.
Her eyes tracked onto mine instantly, and I felt an ache that defied all imagination. The same gaze that would send almost any other Venlil scrambling down the hallway instead gripped some inner part of me in a cold, numb stasis. I couldn’t move. Part of me wanted to run to her and spill out how sorry I was. Another wanted to curl up on the floor right there and sob, returning to that familiar numbness that seemed akin to the ancient enemy of life itself. The cold. That bitterness that pierced through fur, through flesh, through bones, and any ideal held by the naive child that sat next to Tenga’s corpse that day. It ran through until there was nothing left.
Then, I felt a warmth as if someone had draped a blanket over me. I gripped my poncho around my shoulders, grabbing it tightly. I made a quiet promise to myself there and then. Not a promise to my sister, or my parents, or Andrea. Me. I wouldn’t lie down in the cold. Never again. One more hill.
“Hey Lucky,” I said, my voice coarse and breaking every syllable.
The silence was abruptly broken as Lucky, though seemingly frail, shot to her feet. Everyone in the room shifted, prepared for the worst. I didn’t dare move, but I could feel my heart pounding in my legs, my body preparing to bolt. The staff watched her carefully, their grip slightly tightened around their polls. Lucky made no sounds, only stared at me, her nostrils flaring as she gathered my scent. Her right front leg was useless, immobilized against her body. She shifted her footing to steady herself. Then I saw something that replaced fear with tears. She was shaking like a leaf, never taking her eyes off me. She could care less about the others. She was scared. Of me.
I felt myself fall off a ledge in a sensation I’d become all too familiar with over the last few weeks. Tears streamed down my face, my breath hitching as I brought my paws up to my face. I fell to my knees, the presence of the staff had become irrelevant. “I’m…I’m sorry,” I exhaled between gasps. “I’m so sorry.”
So there it was. My new reality. It wasn’t what I’d hoped for, but it was what I expected. I didn’t know what I’d do then, and I didn’t know now. Could I go on without Lucky? She was the one fortress in the turbulent seas of my broken mind. She was the one I could always count on. The one that I knew would always be there, no matter what. Now I was convinced she was terrified of me.
I sat there a shattered mess for a long moment, tumbling off that cliff and reaching out for anything to catch myself, but found nothing but jagged stones. I felt a hand on my shoulder, Doctor Gavin attempting to comfort me, I assumed. Until I felt something touch my knee. I looked up, thrown out of the spiral abruptly. Lucky was now just in front of me, licking my leg. I froze, confused. She gently laid down, careful of her bandaged leg as she rested her head on my leg, looking up at me. That was the same leg she’d broken months ago. Finally, I got it. “I hurt you, and you still loved me.”
A wave of relief rushed through me and I looked down at her, eyes glossy with tears. I bent down and rested my head against hers. I laughed, though it sounded more like a sob. For the first time in days, I felt whole again.
Lucky still loved me.
First Prev [Next]

Hello!
I hope we're all doing well!
We did relatively okay last time, with our secondary parlay landing clean! Everything else kinda fell apart, but I did a bit better than I feared i would have done.
Another rough fight night to predict here! Should be a fun event though.
Onwards to the predictions!
(c) - Champ
D/DWCS - Debut/Dana Whites' Contender Series
FLS - Fight Lose Streak
FWS - Fight Win Streak
NS - No Streak
(#x) - Rank in Division
x/3 - Confidence Levels
lets go!
Prelims
Women’s Strawweight
Emily Ducote (-275) (13-8-0, NS) v Vanessa Demopoulos (+220) (10-5-0, NS) - Oh look, a fight that’s probably going to go to the scorecards. Ducote is coming off a relatively strong win against Yoder, she was very capable of stuffing all of those takedown attempts coming her way and matching the tenacity of Yoder on the feet. Now, I am always a bit iffy when it comes to someone with a record like Ducotes’, but I do believe they (The UFC) didn’t quite build her up properly, giving her opponents like Godinez and Hill very early on in her UFC career. Ducote is a fairly well rounded fighter who does well on her feet, but most importantly, her grappling is relatively good, having been capable of defending the takedowns of Godinez, which isn’t a small feat since Godinez is well known for her wrestling capabilities. That ability to defend takedowns is massively important when dealing with someone like Demopoulos, whose main threat in most of her fights are her takedowns and grappling attacks. Ducote has fairly standard striking attacks for a well rounded MMA fighter, she is very quick on the feet and throws a lot of volume when she attacks, which could prove challenging to Demopoulos as she tries to enter range and initiate a takedown. Now, whilst Ducote has a lot of volume and speed to her strikes, she lacks in the “finishing” area, she doesn’t quite have the tenacity to finish her opponents, there’s no hurry. With that said though, she does have a bit of a familiar pattern of touching up her opponents until that right hand finds its mark, then she adds emphasis on that right-side punch. She has, however, one weird tendency to just stand there, staring, whilst in the pocket, with a rather square stance, and whilst that might help her with the offensive output, she is still standing there with minimal defences. That’s something that has contributed to her losses in the past and something that Demopoulos could possibly use as a way to find an entry for a takedown. Demopoulos is coming off a win against Murata, but it was a fairly unimpressive performance with Demopoulos getting taken down a lot, and although she looked fairly good on the feet with powerful single attacks, I don’t quite know how effective she is going to be against a volume-heavy fighter like Ducote. Demopoulos has a few tendencies as a fighter that are great, she is fairly active in the guard off her back, throwing up submissions very quickly, but the problem with that is nowadays if you can’t lock in a submission, then you are losing the fight, and I think if Demopoulos does pull guard, Ducote should have the ability to control her on the ground and avoid submissions. This is a very, very 50/50 fight in my opinion. Ducote has a slight advantage on the feet due to her speed and volume, but on the ground it’s looking like Demopoulos has the advantages there, as she does have great instinct on when to lock in a submission or shift the hips. The safest bet here is either o2.5 rounds or the fight going the distance, this isn’t a ML bet fight by any means in my opinion. As for my prediction, I am very split but i’m leaning towards Ducote to win this one, but it’s the slightest lean one can imagine.
Ducote via UD - (1/3)
Bantamweight
Alatengheili (+150) (16-9-2, NS) v Kleydson Rodrigues (-185) (8-3-0, NS) - This is a fascinating one. Alatengheili was scheduled to fight a month ago but it was cancelled due to an illness, so I fully expect him to fight again this week. The kinda good news about that is he doesn’t really need to have a big camp since he already had the conditioning and cardio from that other camp preparing for Victor Hugo. Alatengheili is a very aggressive and powerful fighter, everything he throws has so much speed and power behind it, and whilst there might not be a lot of volume behind those punches, he shouldn’t be underestimated on the feet because of his explosiveness. Alatengheili also uses that explosive power to wrestle, and he is fairly good on the ground, able to maintain a strong position at all times and just land heavy ground and pound. Alatengheili is powerful but he doesn’t display that power with reckless abandon, he tends to be a bit of a counter puncher, his hands are often low or loose, which lures his opponent in to strike, in which he then propels himself forward with a quick flurry of dangerous punches, then there’s a reset and he waits to lure his opponent in again. That’s his typical gameplan and it works a lot of the time, but I do think he might get exposed by one thing that Rodrigues could do, and that’s chop at the legs to remove or mitigate that explosiveness that Alatengheili relies on. Rodrigues on the other hand has not had as much experience nor octagon time that Alatengheili has had, but his style seems to be a bit of a challenge for Alatengheili, at least from what I can see. Rodrigues is very well rounded, he is very quick on the feet, but most of all, he doesn’t do anything too crazy to be lured into a potential counter-flurry by Alatengheili. Rodrigues loves to kick at range, he is so dynamic and can switch up the angles of the attacks so quickly that he could possibly just keep kicking Alatengheili until the fight is over, as long as he keeps a safe distance from a retaliatory attack. He is very quick at throwing out those kicks and I do think if he attacks the legs early enough he is going to be effective, as Gutierrez was when he fought Alatengheili. Alatengheili is going to have to mix it up in this fight to get ahead, he is going to have to rely heavily on his wrestling in order to get a win here, because we have seen that Rodrigues is mostly a kickboxestriker, and if Alatengheili can push a nasty pace and pressure (something he only does if he is successful with his counters or see’s his opponent is hurt), that completely removes Rodrigues’ ability to kick. However, the biggest danger with any sort of aggressive forward movement from Alatengheili is the ridiculous hand speed of Rodrigues, his boxing speed is ferocious and he doesn’t necessarily overthrow, everything is clean and tight, and given how open the defences are with Alatengheili, I do think a check left hook or an uppercut is going to be a highly effective tool that Rodrigues is going to utilise, especially if Alatengheili is going to look for takedowns. The focus and timing of Rodrigues is something that I really like also, he is so calm but intense in the cage, he sees a lot of his opponents attacks coming, and since Alatengheili’s actions are huge and relatively easy to read (as there is quite a wind up for it) Rodrigues should be able to avoid it or counter effectively. One major thing I want to point out here that makes me lean on Rodrigues even moreso is the striking inaccuracy of Alatengheili, he is a powerful fighter, i cannot state this enough, but it is thanks to that power and his willingness to throw down heavy punches that he often misses. I’m gonna list some stats, so bear with me… These are his striking accuracy stats from a handful of his recent fights, starting from the most recent to ones earlier in his career. Gutierrez with 28% Accuracy, Anheliger with 37%, Lopez with 30% and Kenney with 26%. This is why I emphasized before how important Alatengheili’s wrestling is going to be in this fight, because if you’re going to go up against a very tricky and accurate striker like Rodrigues, you cannot play that accuracy game and risk winging punches against him. With that said though, don’t count of Alatengheili here, his power and explosiveness are always going to be a problem and it should generally be a good idea to sprinkle a little bit of money on him, even moreso that he’s an underdog. My prediction for this fight is a long, drawn out Rodrigues win, but it’s a tough one because we haven’t quite seen that much greatness from Rodrigues.
Rodrigues via UD - (1/3)
Women’s Strawweight
Piera Rodriguez (-175) (9-1-0, NS) v Ariane Carnelossi (+145) (14-3-0, NS) - Normally, a lot of fights interest me, even the ones that don’t interest the vast majority of others… but this one? I have no feelings one way or the other about this one, it seems like a filler fight lol. Rodriguez is a relatively well rounded fighter coming off a tough loss against Gillian Robertson, and I mean, that kind of loss tends to come with the territory of wrestling a well known submission specialist, so I don’t exactly fault Rodriguez for losing in that way. There is very little doubt that Rodriguez is going to have a major advantage in the wrestling department, a lot of her fights involve her taking down her opponent, it's what she does exceptionally well and considering how dreadful Carnelossi’s takedown defence is, it is going to be Piera’s imperative to take down Carnelossi. The problem with Rodriguez is that she's a little bit one dimensional, she doesn’t do too well on the feet and Carnelossi does have very strong strikes, I mean, look at her, she’s absolutely a power puncher. Rodriguez is highly diverse with her striking, both in terms of range and variability of attack, she has excellent fundamentals with the boxing, landing combinations in the pocket and moving away, and one main thing she does extremely well is that jab, its a really long, lunging jab, and the reason why I point that out is because it somewhat masks the takedown, she uses that jab over and over, and because that motion to jab is almost similar to a level change, she doesn’t necessarily feint the jab to get to the level change/takedown position, but her opponents just think another jab is coming. This is going to be a great set up against Carnelossi, attack her with long, prodding jabs, and after a few of those, go for a level change, because its that long lunge that looks like a level change. To put it bluntly, anything to get a level change and a takedown will be highly effective against Carnelossi. Carnelossi is an interesting one to talk about because she had a fun start to her career with an extremely entertaining fight against Liang Na, but if you look closely, she is just a fun fighter, not a great one. Her punching power is probably her biggest asset, because everywhere else she absolutely is not worth talking about, and it’s that punching power that will be evident when she inevitably clips Rodriguez. Carnelossi is one dimensional, but boy is she scrappy and I don’t think Rodriguez can afford to get crazy with her on the feet, because Rodriguez will be hurt by something in the pocket, the smartest thing Rodriguez can ideally do is level change and absolutely remove the power from Carnelossi, and considering that Carnelossi’s power is generated from a very still-standing stance, it wouldn’t take much to take her off her feet. I got Rodriguez winning this one, it should hopefully be a fun fight.
Rodriguez via UD - (1/3)
Middleweight
Abus Magomedov (-250) (25-6-1, 2 FLS) v Warlley Alves (+205) (14-7-0, 3 FLS) - It kind of seems like they are setting Magomedov up for success here. Magomedov may have had a tough last two bouts, but considering the fact that he faced Strickland and Borralho, that’s ridiculous levels of competition for a newcomer. Magomedov had one major issue exposed when he fought Strickland and that was his cardio, everything else he looked absolutely incredible at, he has a lot of power in his hands, he’s long and dynamic with his attacks and he has great wrestling, but it was his cardio that made him fall apart. During his Borralho fight, despite losing that bout, those cardio issues didn’t seem as present, he has seemingly learnt to pace himself and he honestly looks to be a decent up and comer now that he’s facing slightly more adjusted competition instead of straight up killers. Magomedov has a massive, massive reach advantage over Alves, and that’s going to be prevalent when Magomedov lands those beautiful strikes at range. He does use his kicks alot, and alongside said kicks are a lot of knee feints, it's a bit odd to look at, it could just be him getting ready to check leg kicks or to feint a kick, but it's just one of those things that I can’t quite figure out. Anyway, Magomedov’s cardio is going to be in question again today, and whilst I did say that he seems to be mostly fine, or at least a bit better than when he fought Strickland, he still tends to overthrow a lot, there is no pitter patter of punches that you somewhat see, they’re all still big actions and those big actions cost him his cardio early on. The best way to kind of describe Magomedov, at least cardio wise, is a slightly more talented and skillful McKinney. My main concern is how exposed his face is to getting hit, all it would take is for Alves to rush in like a bull and throw some heavy overhand punches, make it very gritty in there and make Magomedov tired. That’s the only way I can kind of see Magomedov struggle a lot. Alves is an exceptionally quick starter, he is an absolute firecracker and if he can catch Magomedov early, that’s going to be absolutely massive given the size difference. Everything Alves throws comes with silly amounts of power, and he isn’t necessarily a headhunter, he chops at the legs and body occasionally, he’s quite diverse and I think those leg kicks are going to be problematic for Magomedov, considering Magomedov needs to push forward in order to get his combinations off. Alves is a tough, tough fighter, and whilst he is coming off a savage knockout by Aliskerov, I do think that Alves is still one dangerous fighter to take on, maybe not as technical as Borralho (to compare to Magomedov’s last opponent), but he is an absolute monster when it comes to aggression and that alone could exhaust Magomedov. However, the reach and movement of Magomedov is going to be a major challenge here. I am not completely counting out Alves here, I think he is being a bit underestimated here, but I just think Magomedov has a lot more tools in his arsenal that is going to be boosted by that reach advantage, and it does seem that Alves is fairly susceptible to down the pipe shots, something that Magomedov does well. Range and distance are going to be the main gameplan for Magomedov and his time I think. I got Magomedov winning this one, but i am not very confident in this one due to the volatility of Alves’ actions. He is a wild and fast starter so I expect that first round to be the most sketchiest.
Magomedov via KO R2 - (1/3)
Women’s Bantamweight
Tamires Vidal (+300) (7-2-0, NS) v Melissa Gatto (-410) (8-2-2, 2 FLS) - This is certainly an interesting one. Vidal is coming off a tough loss against Rendon, and it was a bit of a boring fight in all honesty, with Vidal being somewhat effective on the feet with big and powerful attacks, but ultimately succumbing to the wrestling of Rendon. I don’t see that much changing this time around since Gatto is a great wrestler and Vidal has clearly shown major defensive issues in the wrestling department, so to put it bluntly, it just seems like Vidal has a puncher's chance, and if she does land those punches, I do think the tides can change a little in her favour, but it would only take one takedown for Gatto to be in full control for the rest of that round. Outside of her loss to Rendon, Vidal looked fun against Pascual, then again, a lot of fighters of a reasonably low calibre can look good against Pascual, so I think that was one of those “set up for success” fights. Still, the aggression and threat of a knockdown/out from Vidal will be fairly prevalent during this fight. But that’s about it, shes a powerful striker and quite dynamic, but her takedown defence is going to be a problem. Gatto was scheduled to fight Dudakova a few weeks ago, however that fight fell off, which is probably good for Gatto coz she’s ready for a fight regardless, shes still somewhat fresh off camp and was going to probably employ the same strategy against Vidal that she would have against Dudakova, and that was to wrestle. Gatto’s wrestling has always been a bit of a highlight for her, she’s physically strong and is able to do well in advantageous positions, holding her opponents down and either landing ground and pound or just grinding them out, exhausting them for a large chunk of the round. Gatto is also very dangerous on the feet, she has deceptively quick and powerful punches which she uses to both damage her opponents but also as an opportunity to raise their guard so the level change is more easily accessible. No matter what way you cut this slice of cake, I think Gatto’s wrestling is going to be a major problem for Vidal, and Vidal’s only way to win this fight is to keep it standing and just brawl, make it look gritty in there and potentially freeze up Gatto’s ability to wrestle cleanly. I am leaning on Gatto to win this one, but that unpredictability of Vidal’s aggression is going to be a big factor here. No major bet advice here, it seems like there is a possibility of it going over 2.5 rounds, but that’s about it.
Gatto via UD - (1/3)
Light Heavyweight
Oumar Sy (D) (9-0-0, 9 FWS) v Tuco Tokkos (D) (10-3-0, 3 FWS) - ITS DOUBLE DEBUT TIME!!! These are getting rarer and rarer the more we see fighters from DWCS make their way to the UFC, so this is a fun little occasion. Sy is coming into this fight a little bit more prepared, at least physically and cardio wise, than his replacement opponent in Tokkos. Sy is coming off a string of beautiful fights on various promotions, but most importantly he’s been relatively tested on KSW, which is one of the better promotions to come out of the European world of MMA. Sy is a long and rangey fighter who has dangerous head kicks and dangerous wrestling skills that he uses really well, and whilst he has a massive reach advantage over his opponent, he doesn’t exactly strike in any traditional way, you don’t see him throw a lot of jabs, he mostly uses his reach to lock in takedowns (since it’s easier to lock in takedowns with longer arms), and the moment the fight goes to the ground, expect him to find a position to where he can reign down heavy ground and pound. I would love to see him strike a bit more, but most of his fights are him taking his opponents down and landing ground and pound, and if he does that against a replacement fighter in Tokkos, I expect him to dominate and completely shut down Tokkos since it would take preparation to get out of funky positions that Sy puts his opponents in, and I don’t know if Tokkos has that wrestling background to handle the larger and longer opponent in Sy properly on the ground. Tokkos seemingly came out of nowhere this last week, and that one thing that blasted me in the face was the record of his second most recent opponent, Brian Jackson. Dudes got a 1-7 record and Tokkos torched him (expectedly), that doesn’t bring a lot of confidence to me that a guy like Tokkos, coming from a relatively decent gym in Kill Cliff FC, takes on and fights someone like that. Tokkos is overall a decent fighter with some strong wins under his belt, but the main thing going against him here is preparation time, and whilst he does have a fair bit of experience under his belt, I just don’t think he’s ready for someone like Sy on short notice. Tokkos is a relatively well rounded fighter with great wrestling and decent striking, but i just think all of that is going to be possibly negated by the substantial reach advantage of Sy. This is a double debut though, and whilst I normally steer clear from calling someone new to the UFC a lock, I think the fact that Sy has had a full camp for… three fights (Bellato, Trocolli (both cancelled) and now Tokkos), I think he’s ready for this fight and ready for the UFC. He will be an optional lock, but still a 2/3 confidence pick, if that makes sense.
Sy via KO R1 (2/3)
Lightweight
Tom Nolan (-450) (6-1-0, NS) v Victor Martinez (+340) (13-5-0, NS) - Both fighters made their debut and lost in the same way, in the same round, so let’s call this a second attempt at a debut lol. Nolan made his debut against knockout artist Nikolas Motta, and honestly that is a dangerous fight for anyone to take, but it probably made sense to the matchmakers since both fighters are prolific knockout artists. Nolan does finish his opponents very quickly a lot of the time, and I do think he has a massive advantage on the feet against Martinez since Martinez isn’t exactly a big threat on the feet, and his inactivity over the past few years (or lack of solid activity at least) leaves some questions hanging in the air. Nolan has a reach and height advantage here, but the most prominent advantage will be with his reach where he can string together gorgeous straight combinations to decent effect, and that’s what he’s really known for, he’s got awesome boxing and he is very confident in his punching power. He is also relatively defensively sound for someone with his size because I have pointed out before that a lot of taller and longer fighters don’t shell up a lot or have a lot of defensive layers to their style, but Nolan is overall a fairly solid boxer both on the offence and defence, it’s just a shame he got fed to the wolf when he fought Motta. Nolan made the simple mistake when he fought Motta of being in the pocket without care, and i think those kinds of mistakes are easy enough to fix, and considering Martinez is not the same kind of threat on the feet compared to Motta, I do think that gives Nolan a bit more freedom to string together combinations and overall look great on the feet, as he was meant to be, since his whole career up until that loss to Motta has been him having gorgeous striking. Martinez is coming off a KO loss also, but it was by Jordan Leavitt, and that’s just a painful look on anyone's record to get knocked out by someone who is not known for his striking. Martinez is overall a good striker, he has very fast hands, but I have noticed one thing about him that I can see Nolan landing cleanly. Martinez has the tendency to leave his right hand far from a block position, its more of a parry position, in front of him instead of beside him, and he tends to lower that hand when taking a back step, and I cannot help but see the Southpaw striker in Nolan land that left hand to the chin of Martinez. Now, any sort of exchange between either fighter here is going to be a dangerous one for both parties, but that is where reach comes in, Nolan has a diverse boxing skillset and his long attacks allow him to carry power as much as anyone elses short hooks would. One major thing Martinez is going to have to be careful of is a knee up the middle by Nolan as Nolan’s height is going to allow that knee to come up to target without a major loss to momentum, and I mean, if Martinez got dropped by Rosales on DWCS, then by Leavitt, I just don’t know if he has the chin to withstand the battering that comes from Nolan. I got Nolan winning this one, but this is going to be a fantastic fight which isn’t likely to go the distance.
Nolan via KO R1 - (2/3)
Main Card
Women’s Strawweight
Angela Hill (#12) (-160) (16-13-0, NS) v Luana Pinheiro (#13) (+130) (11-2-0, NS) - This is a great fight. Hill is coming off a very strong win over Denise Gomes, and it was honestly such a brilliant performance by someone who a lot of people tend to ignore. Hill is an incredibly diverse fighter, she is tenacious on the feet, highly capable of stringing together strong combinations from all ranges, and as she closes the distance, she’s good at tying up her opponent in a clinch and landing awesome knees and elbows. This is all Hill and her cumulative experience in the Octagon against a wide range of different fighters and styles, and it’s clear to me that her preparation for a lot of her fights involve solid planning and back up plans, because whilst her record reflects a rough run through her career, her level of competition is insane. Hill isn’t a finisher though, but she is someone who can keep a ridiculous pace for three rounds, so I do think that she has the capabilities to overwhelm Pinheiro on the feet, especially since we just saw Ribas do the same thing a little over 5 months ago. Hill will have a striking advantage in this fight, she throws a lot of volume at high speed towards her opponent and they do land effectively, and with a slight edge in reach I do see her having a bit more success on the feet here especially since Pinheiro does not have a lot of head movement or striking defence. Pinheiro is a danger to Hill in the grappling department though, especially in those transitions from standing to ground, she utilises hip throws relatively well and could make this fight ugly on the ground, but I don’t think there is a major submission threat here, I think her style is predominantly control and ground and pound, both things that Hill has experience in dealing with, although she still will lose the round if Pinheiro executes her gameplan well. Pinheiro has power in her hands, she could potentially make Hill a little bit frozen and hesitant on the feet once Pinheiro lands that overhand right that Pinheiro loves to throw early, but she doesn’t throw it often enough to lead to a significant finish, she’s a very low volume, high impact striker and that could play in the favour of Hill if Hill’s volume walks Pinheiro back into the cage. Pinheiro could make this fight dangerous for Hill on the ground, but we have seen a few times now that Hill is very good at the basics of takedown defence, underhooks, whizzers (if i spelt that correctly) and quickly getting back to a standing position, she is not complacent on the ground or in that transition to the ground, and I think any sort of failed takedown attempt from Pinheiro is going to fuel Hill a lot more, since Pinheiro only has a few kinds of takedowns. This is a hard on to pick in all seriousness, I might get the prediction wrong, but I have a strong feeling that we are going to see this fight go over 2.5 rounds, or even hit the scorecards. As for the prediction, looking at this fight, I am kind of leaning on Hill here, because Pinheiro’s wins aren’t as significant as Hill’s wins, and i do think Pinheiro fades a little bit as the fight goes on.
Hill via UD - (1/3)
Bantamweight
Adrian Yanez (-350) (16-5-0, 2 FLS) v Vinicius Salvador (+275) (14-6-0, 2 FLS) - I love this fight. Yanez is coming off two painful back to back KO losses, whenever a young fighter comes into the UFC, tears through the division, then hits a losing skid, it’s always a concern to any fan or pundit. However, I do think that leg kick KO is anomalous to the UFC, it rarely happens and I don’t think Salvador is much of a leg kicker anyway so the threat isn’t there. However, I do want to add that the psychological factor of maybe getting leg kicked to oblivion is going to weigh heavy on Yanez’ mind, and I do wonder if Yanez has drilled checking leg kicks before. Now, Yanez is still a dangerous opponent for anyone to take, he still has incredibly technical MMA boxing, and that’s going to be on full display this weekend. Yanez is so fluid and yet tricky on the feet, he’s very good at gauging range and firing away from different angles, as well as timing his shots off his opponents striking attempts, everything involving striking exchanges will most likely be in the favour of Yanez, he thrives in that space and I do believe his experience and his wins prior to those two devastating losses are going to shine this weekend. My only concern about Yanez is his ability to not get carried away and show his chin too much, because whilst Salvador is yet to get a win in the UFC, he still has had some mild striking success against fighters like Altamirano and Vergara, and it wouldn’t take a lot for Salvador to find the chin of Yanez. Salvador is a very funky and unorthodox fighter, and whilst that always brings positive attention to him, I also think that has been a product of failure for him also since the more cleaner fighters outbox him, are generally a lot faster and just find their mark a bit quicker, if that makes sense? I mean, Salvador’s stance is fairly loose, his chin is in the air and his shell is rather loose, and that’s not good news, especially if he’s facing a vicious fighter like Yanez. Salvador thrives in chaotic fights though, he is awesome and making it dangerous and risky for his opponents to fight in the pocket, but his style emanates a lack of self preservation. He is a kill or be killed kind of fighter in my opinion, and I firmly believe that when he got dropped numerous times in that first round against Victor Altamirano, it only showed us, and any future opponent (via tape watch in prep) that he is very hittable, his head is right there and the only reason it wasn’t there for Vergara was due to the significant difference in height and reach. Salvador moving up to 135 could make him a lot more interesting in terms of being able to explode more often and having more power behind his punches, but I also think it means he is dealing with more harder hitting fighters, and with the accuracy and boxing skill set of Yanez, I just think Salvador is going to get outdone here. I got Yanez winning this one, but I am interested to see if Salvador has what it takes to win and upset a lot of parlays out there.
Yanez via KO R2 - (1/3)
Welterweight
Ramiz Brahimaj (+170) (10-4-0, NS) v Themba Gorimbo (-205) (12-4-0, 2 FWS) - Brahimaj is coming back after two tough years away, and the reason why it’s tough is because he has been dealing with a spinal injury, and boy do i empathise with that. Now, his injury is mostly C-Spine and shoulder area nerve damage, this is terrible for a fighter because it effectively eliminates your ability to comfortably strike, sprawl, wrestle, underhook/overhook stuff, everything that you see in a fighter typically comes from shoulder rotation and all that stuff, so for Brahimaj to be out for two years, dealing with all of that, does not give me a lot of confidence in him being 100% coming into this fight against Gorimbo. Brahimaj is a dangerous grappler who thrives on the ground, he is honestly only dangerous on the ground, but the problem is that Gorimbo is very good on the ground himself, at least good enough to know what is being set up, and it’s on the ground where Brahimaj has his only chance to win. Unfortunately for Brahimaj, it’s going to take some work to get the fight to the ground and Gorimbo is more than willing to keep the fight standing, so honestly, I just don’t think Brahimaj is going to be as well rounded or as effective as he needs to be in order to get a win here. Gorimbo is riding some momentum coming into this fight, as he is coming off a lightning quick KO over Pete Rodriguez, and I mean, Rodriguez sucks, he’s one of the worst fighters in the UFC and that KO means nothing in the grand scheme of things, it’s just an additional win on a record with barely any weight to it. Gorimbo is going to be a lot more confident in his boxing though since that win, that feeling of getting knockouts is an addictive one and I think he’s going to be using his incredible reach advantage to look to get another KO this weekend over the possibly rusty Brahimaj. Gorimbo is a very well rounded fighter who honestly has a lot of potential to be a star, he has excellent boxing, and honestly very good wrestling and grappling, and I do think if the fight does go to the ground, Gorimbo has the fight IQ to notice set ups coming, neutralize them and remain on top in control, landing ground and pound or just advancing to his own submission positions. The most likely scenario though is Gorimbo keeps this fight standing and overwhelms Brahimaj on the feet, because he probably wants to chase another KO since that feeling is notoriously addictive. I got Gorimbo winning this one, I can’t wait to see how far this man goes in his career.
Gorimbo via KO R1 - (2/3)
Co-Main Event
Welterweight
Khaos Williams (-125) (14-3-0, NS) v Carlston Harris (+105) (19-5-0, 2 FWS) - This feels like a classic Striker versus Grappler fight. Williams is a strong, powerful striker who is such a threat on the feet, especially early on when he wants to push a nasty pace and land those devastating punches. He is known for being a bully, crashing forward with crazy power and aggression. There is no clean technique coming from Williams, it is mostly wild, wild punches and he is confident in his ability to knock out his opponent, that’s what makes him a dangerous threat to his opponents, that confidence. The right hand is Williams best weapon, his right overhand or hook is going to be the one that knocks out Harris if it lands, but that’s all he is, a powerful right side puncher, and if Harris times a takedown well, all of that threat is gone. On the flip side, Harris is primarily a grappler with a solid grappling base, and whilst he has faced his fair share of dangerous strikers, I believe Williams’ power is something different. Now, Harris has the potential to take this fight to the ground, I know that according to UFC stats that Harris has an 80% takedown defence, but there has not been enough wrestling in his fights, by his opponents, to fully prove that his takedown defence is that great, it’s only been used sparingly against him since most of his fights are absolute wild exchanges and beautiful displays of violence on the feet. Williams' propensity to head hunt could lead to an opening for a level change by Harris, but it’s a risky thing to do because any punch that lands on Harris is going to hurt him, and considering the age factor here, its possible his chin isn’t going to hold up well against the power of Williams. Now, Harris was getting ragdolls and outwrestled by Wells when they fought, and whilst that isn’t a great look for Harris, I don’t think Williams has the wrestling capabilities that Wells has, so I think the main submission threat from Harris in this fight is going to come from the clinch, so guillotines and front head choke variants are going to be on the menu for Harris this weekend, it’s just a matter of if he gets into that position or if he gets his head blasted over and over by powerful punches from Williams. This is a dangerous fight to bet on if you’re thinking of Moneyline betting, it can easily go either way since both excel in their respective styles, the safest and smartest bet here in my opinion is that this fight doesn’t hit the judges scorecards. As for my prediction, I don’t think i’ll be getting this right due to the volatile nature of this match up, but…
Harris via Sub R2 - (1/3)
Main Event
Featherweight
Edson Barboza (#14) (+125) (24-11-0, 2 FWS) v Lerone Murphy (-150) (13-0-1, 5 FWS FWS) - Man this is a funky main event. Barboza is a legend of the sport, but most importantly, and perhaps most relevant to this write up, he is an old dog who can still hang with the toughest. His last two wins have been against Yusuff and Quarantillo, two very difficult fighters to take on at 145 and it’s his win over Yusuff that I want to highlight… Yusuff exploded in the first round, looked for that finish and Barboza survived and thrived throughout the rest of the fight, it was a beautiful display of heart, toughness, and adaptability, because that was not the first firefight that Barboza has been in, and considering his current opponent, it sure as shit won’t be his last. Barboza is well known for his outstanding kicks, but he’s also just overall a ridiculously dangerous striker. An understated aspect of his whole game though is his wrestling and grappling, he might not be looking for a lot of takedowns when he fights, but he is well versed on the ground, having taken down Yusuff 3 of 4 times in the final round of a high pace main event is testament to his cardio and conditioning, despite the concern surrounding his age. Barboza is going to be a true test on the feet for Murphy, and I think it’s going to be the toughest fight of his career. Murphy is coming off a string of strong victories in the UFC, with his most recent one being against Culibao, and I gotta say, Murphy is one of those dangerous prospects that we all should keep an eye on. Murphy is a rapidly improving fighter who adds weapons to his arsenal every single time he comes out. He was originally a boxer with outstanding punching power and speed, he was ridiculously slick on the feet, but after each fight he adds more kicks, more movement and wrestling, he has slowly become a very well rounded fighter, and this makes his upcoming bout against a very tested veteran who is still here to stay in Barboza incredibly fascinating. There is a slight catch to all of those additional things added into his arsenal though, and that’s each time something has been added, the next opponent has something else to prepare for. I firmly believe that Murphy’s rise to this position and to this fight is not from his outstanding skill level, but from his incredible repertoire of techniques he has acquired and learnt over his UFC career. Unpredictability is king when it comes to new fighters, we have seen new fighters add things to their game that have completely changed and accelerated their growth, and that’s exactly what we have seen for Murphy. Murphy has a wide variety of strong strikes he uses effortlessly, from standard boxing combinations to a very snappy high kick, to strong grappling and control on the ground, he hasn’t mastered any of these things, but since they are added along each and every time he fights, his opponents are rarely prepared. This is not going to be the case for Barboza, Barboza is very, very well rounded and well versed in almost every aspect of MMA. Ill keep this short. I got Barboza winning this one, but I am still going to be a fan of Murphy, regardless of result.
Barboza via UD - (1/3)
Primary Parlay: Ducote/Demopoulos o2.5 or GTD + (optional Gatto/Vidal o2.5 or GTD) + Nolan/Martinez ITD + Hill/Pinheiro o2.5 or GTD + Barboza/Murphy R3 Starts
Locks of the week: Optional Sy + Nolan + Gorimbo
Alt Bets: Alves KO R1, Pinheiro Sub R2 or 3, Williams KO R1, Murphy KO R1 2 or 3 (combo rounds)
And that's it!!!!
Prediction accuracy as of 2024: 64.6%
If you would like to donate and support me, as this is my only income, please do so via Paypal. All write ups are free, donations are insanely optional! https://paypal.me/Slayertip?country.x=AU&locale.x=en_AU
if you wish to keep in contact with me or follow me on twitter, my twitter handle is @Slayer_Tip, and my Discord is Slayertip#7013.
Lets have a fun and friendly discussion down below about this weekends card!
I hope you all have an amazing day, look after yourselves, and enjoy this awesome event!

Most of these ill let go of for cheap since the rolls arent the best. The higher end weapons i want apparel, bloodied swing speed melee, bloodied or quad weapons (non heavy) and or plans. The lower end stuff ill consider almost any offer besides junk or caps.
Hag
Deathclaw
Usa Mask
AAE50WBS Rail
AAE15FR Fixer
AAE50WBS Fixer
B25FFR25AP Rail
B50C15FR EPR (Severe Beta Wave Tuner, Stabilized Sniper Barrel, Stabilized Stock, Long Night Vision Scope)
B25FFR90 Fixer
Q50VHC15VCC Fixer
QE50WBS Fixer
Q25FFR25AP Bolt-Action Pipe Pistol
Q25FFR100FMS Rail
Q50C1A Rail
Q50C90 Rail
Q50C15FR NU Laser Rifle
TSE25AP Rail
TSE15FR Rail
AA15AP15VCC Fixer
AA50C1A Elders Mark
AAE1A Elders Mark
AA50CGhost EPR (True Automatic Barrel)
AA50C1A Black Powder Blunderbuss
AA40SS25AP Super Sledge
Ari50C25AP Rail
Beserkers25DWA25AP Rail
B40SS15LDTWB Grognak Axe
B25FFR1P Handmade
B50C1S Deathclaw Gauntlet
B50C1S Lead Pipe
B40SS Meat Hook (Two Star)
BE50DRWA Handmade
B25MDWNM1S Drill
B25DWA25AP Rail
BE50DRWA Rail
BE Assault Rifle (Two Star)
B40SS Sledge Hammer (Two Star Level Ten)
B40SS Super Sledge (Two Star)
FE25AP Rail
GourE15FR LMG
Jug40SS40LDTWPA Chainsaw
Jug40SS25AP Chainsaw
Jug40SS50WBS Meat Hook
Jug50C1P Rail
Jug25FFR15FR Rail
Jug50C15FR Western Revolver
Junk25FFR90 Rail
Jug25FFR15FR Fixer
Mutants50C90 Chainsaw
Mutants50C15FR Handmade
StalkersE1P Handmade
Sup40PA1S Chainsaw
SupE90 LMG
Sup25FFR15FR Rail
TS50LD15FR Fixer
TS25DWA90 Handmade
Troubleshooters25FFR25AP Rail
V50C40LDTWPA Chainsaw
VE1A LMG
Uny1SWWR Sturdy Robot Left Leg

So I have been seriously working out for about a month or two, and my main goal is muscle hypertrophy and muscle gain.
I have also been on a calorie deficit for around a month, trying to lose weight to better my physique.
Below is my current PPL split workout plan, i usually go to the gym 3-4 times a week with the rest of the days as rest days, around 2-3min rest inbetween each set, and around 1.5h spent in the gym every session + minimal cardio:
Push day:

1. Machine Chest Press: 3 sets x 8 reps (pecs, delts, triceps) [25kg]
2. Machine Shoulder Press: 3 sets x 8 reps (main delts, pecs, triceps, core) [11kg]
3. Pec Deck: 2 sets x 8 reps (pecs) [20kg]
4. Lateral Raise Machine: 2 sets x 8 reps (lat, delts, a bit of traps) [18kg]
5. Tricep Pushdown: 3 sets x 10 reps [13kg]
6. Overhead Extension: 2 sets x 8 reps [14kg]

Pull Day:

1. T-Bar Row: 3 sets x 8 reps (lats, rhombs, traps, rear delts) [25kg]
2. Lat Pulldown: 3 sets x 10 reps (pecs, rhombs, traps, lats) [23kg]
3. Cable Curls: 3 sets x 10 reps (biceps, brachialis, forearms, delts) [40kg]
4. Rear Delt Fly (Pec Deck): 3 sets x 10 reps (pecs, delts) [20kg]
5. Machine Preacher Curls: 2 sets x 10 reps (biceps, brachialis) [14kg]
6. Seated Row: 2 sets x 8 reps (rhombs, traps, biceps) [31kg]

Leg day:

1. Sitting Calf Raise: 4 sets x 8 reps (solutes, calves) [20kg]
2. Back Squat: 4 sets x 12 reps (lower back, glutes, hamstrings) [30kg]
3. Leg Press: 4 sets x 12 reps (quadriceps, glutes, hamstrings, calves) [63kg]
4. Reverse Lunge: 3 sets x 10 reps (core, glutes, quadriceps, hamstrings, calves) [14kg]
5. Leg Extension: 4 sets x 12 reps (quadriceps, femoris) [32kg]
6. Hamstring Extension: 3 sets x 12 reps (hips, knees, hamstrings) [32kg]

Sex: m Age: 17 Height: 169cm Weight: 81kg
I do progressive overload each week as well to ensure and maintain that i will be getting muscle definition and muscle gain.

After my long-awaited surgery, the day finally came. I was so nervous lying in the hospital bed as I had never had anesthesia before. Thankfully, I was a bit relieved since my boyfriend and mother were there by my side, comforting me. I also had a very lovely nurse who put on a heating machine for me and made sure I was at ease. When the anesthesiologist came into my room and talked to me about the process, I started to tear up, but not noticeably because I didn’t want to be dramatic. However, I was just very anxious, and it was most likely written all over my face. Anyways, the nurses who were going to be in the OR room came and gave me the anesthesia. However, I did NOT know they were giving it to me and thought they were giving me something else that comes before the anesthesia for some reason. So, I just remembered saying bye to my boyfriend and mom while they held my hand and the nurses rolled me out of the room, and boom, I was out like a light. When I woke up after the surgery, I was so confused; I was dumbfounded. It felt like I teleported through time because I did not remember knocking out, and while you’re knocked out, it’s not like you’re sleeping; it’s like you’re dead. So, I started saying to my mom when I saw her, “they didn’t tell me they were going to put me to sleep,” and then I started hysterically crying because I was so confused. My mom got someone and asked why I was crying; they brought the anesthesiologist in, and he explained that this can happen and it’s most common in women. It’s a normal reaction. While he was explaining all this, I was still crying, saying “I don't know why I’m crying.” I eventually calmed down, but I was still pretty loopy, so I started talking to my nurse about Grey's Anatomy and if I could’ve brought my dog… Honestly, the first day of pain wasn’t so bad, but the days after that, you have to take it real easy, take your medicine, get a heating pad, and lay down. They also gave me these circulating leg machines that compress your legs for circulation, which was really nice. Anyways, that was my experience in the hospital. Please let me know if you can relate to the anesthesia process!

I was a huge supporter of Chubbies going back to around 2015 and they became my favorite shorts brand. I discovered them through Nordstrom and after receiving the first pair, I quickly ordered all the other colors they sold as well. They became the only shorts I'd wear and this is still true to this day. Their "Original Stretch Short" in 5.5" was the one I'd gravitated towards. After realizing they had a website and at times offered a minor discount and had occasional sales, I started ordering from them directly.
What I immediately loved was the length, as I never was able to find short of similar length that were flattering and so easily wearable. They were a good quality short made of durable material with the kind of minor details that really displayed the thoughtfulness of the company. These kind of things showed that whoever ran the company or created the shorts really loved and believed in their product. I went on to buy the original stretch shorts in every color available.
After they sold the company, in 2001 I believe it was because that's when some of the minor details of the shorts started to disappear. Some of the most notable changes were the text inside of the fly next to the zipper and the material used for the pocket linings had been changed. This was probably in order to save money or time on manufacturing. However, the core elements of the shorts including the durable material, the quality of the manufacturing and the apperance of the final product, remained otherwise mainly intact. They still seemed to be a worthy product.
Now let's jump to the second half of this past year. I ordered four pairs of shorts and a variety of colors that hadn't been available before or that I just hadn't previously ordered. Due to owning so many pairs of the same shorts in such a variety of colors and their amazing quality and durability, I hadn't even opened any of the packages for the last shorts that I ordered until this past week. After opening the bag with the first pair, they seemed different. I don't know if it was the fact that the weight was off or that they had a weird gleam to the fabric but I immediately sensed that something wasn't right. Once I put them on I could notice that they didn't fall the same as the other shorts and they didn't have the same weight and they just felt like a completely different pair of shorts.
So my friend and I decided to open the bags of the remaining shorts and see if these were the same or if it was just this one particular color that maybe used a different material. We concluded that all four pairs of shorts were now using a new material unused in any of the previous shorts that I had purchased. This material is extremely thinner and has a weird coating on the fabric, that gives it a sort of shimmer. Material is not only cheaper but the quality of the sewing and the stitching is abysmal. The hemming is completely different then the original manufacturing of the shorts as well as the subsequent manufacturing of the shorts that featured less details. Shortcuts in the hemming of the shorts were one thing but that's not even taking into account that the stitching is completely uneven and even frayed and loose in some spots. This was how they came directly out of the bag, never having been worn or touched by anyone previously but the stitching and hemming was already loose or coming undone. Quite possibly we thought this was only the one pair of shorts so we checked the three other pairs from the same order and come to find out that these also have shoddy stitching and lazy him work and were already coming undone at certain points mainly in the hems of the legs and around the waist.
This was highly disappointing to me as I realized that I no longer had a go-to shorts brand and would have to eventually find something else once all the original pairs of shorts that I'd purchased will someday be unwearable due to normal clothing lifespan running it's course. I highly doubt that the company will go back to making a more costly product or one of the quality of their original shorts. It's sad that they cheapened everything about the item yet remain priced the same and higher for other products. I haven't bought many of their other clothing, such as shirts or slacks but after seeing what's become of an item I once really adored, I'm glad I never wasted money on branching out to their other items. I still own over 35 pairs of their higher quality releases and I'm sure it'll take me time to actually wear any of them out but I feel bad for the people now finding this company, and it's a pale, diluted version of what it once was.
As I stated before when I made the order of last year, I hadn't ordered in quite some time I'm not sure really how long it was, so I can't stay the date of when the products certainly transitioned into what it is now. I only know that the order I placed last year that I just recently opened was not the quality of anything that I received previously. It was also the unfortunate sign that I would no longer be shopping with this brand or recommending its products to anyone any longer. The drop in quality was just that vast, so far removed from what they originally had offered. I don't believe now that the shorts should be sold more than $15 a pair and they're probably honestly worth far less than that to manufacture in their current iteration. It's crazy to think that over the years I've spent more than $2,000 on a single product but that's how much I loved them. Just think about how much money I would have spent in the subsequent years replacing and buying the shorts in a variety of new colors released. Sadly, that will no longer be a part of my future fashion endeavors.
I'm a big believer and supporter of brand loyalty, which is exactly why I've bought so many pairs previously but when a brand veers this far off course it has to be recognized and shared with the community who may be thinking they're buying a worthy product. It's almost as if all the praise for the original product has been used and squandered in order to confuse the consumer, like a bait and switch maneuver, and now sell them this cheaper imitation of what it once was. Although I have more than enough pairs to probably wear them for the next decade, I can't get over the betrayal of the drop in quality without a change of pricing to reflect the lower quality material and the completely shoddy manufacturing.
When Chubbies came to be, they brought with them one product that they made unique again using a style of many years past, something that had long been forgotten in men's fashion. Something that was apparently missed by people or at least wanted by those who came of age after the style of shorts had long been enlongated. At that time there weren't many other brands making a stylish and durable pair of short shorts for men. However I have noticed after the success of Chubbies, both mass produced and high end designer brands now occasionally offer shorts of similar length. I cannot vouch for any of their quality or design attributes as I've been so dedicated to chubby's for these past years but I am aware of other brands now offering their take on men's shorter length shorts. If any of the brands are of good quality regularly, I would imagine that these shorts that they've released would be generally the same. So if you're looking for good quality shorter shorts for men I would check with other brands that you have known and trust their integrity of producing a high quality product that doesn't have to cut so many corners and in turn, destroying the legacy of what was once their reason for existing.

• I had a 1.5 TDCi (90bhp, 215Nm)
• Mileage around 17-18 (me rev happy)
• Running 12-15K an year, last year was an all time high 25K travelled a lot
• Three accidents, I was unscathed, two rear ends. One front end. (In two minor body work, in one trunk got replaced) Now I am just taking this in account for last 8 years
• Want for 10-15 years.
• I paid 9 lacs for this one, that'll be 13.3 lacs in 2024 money including inflation
• I drive in-city, interstate (500 km a leg, in 2 months), mountains (200-400 km a month, won't do this for an year or two if I move)

What I love - Handling - Fun to drive, rev noise, engine - Feels like a solid body - Safety (it had a 3 rating) but felt real safe especially post those minomajor accidents - Relatively low maintenance for the 120K so far
Wary about - Bottom get scraped on ungodly speed breakers and bridges on highways sometimes when at 70-80 (this might not exactly be bottom but it's a troubling noise) - Suspension in potholes not agreeable with passengers (I feel that more comfortable suspensions may lose the drive feel idk) - Less boot space sometimes, not too big a deal - On bad roads does feel like a struggle
New car preference - Love a sedan, not sure it'll help me overcome my woes mentioned above - Open to other body types - Want a similar driving experience but it's a want not a need - Safety - Don't care about features, will install a parking camera and dash cam. I'm sure it'll have Bluetooth and 3 AC types lol - 10-18 lacs budget, lower the better, have other plans for my money - Currently in Chandigarh, will move to Hyderabad/Gurgaon for a few years in 2024 then let's see - A reliavle automatic is a want but I am okay with a manual too, like my cars to be fun - Good AC, love my car takes less than a minute to be comfortable after being in sun all day, also a want
Cars in mind - Open to other suggestions - City, Slavia, Virtus, Amaze? (May feel like a downgrade) - Seltos, Kushaq, Taigun, Elevate, (not sure about those Maruti-Toyota partnership cars, else urban cruiser) - CSUVs like Sonet I can compromise to if they check more boxes, are certainly cheaper

To live in the Undead Burg is a daily test of one’s wit and their will. The brutish and dull fall to the cunning, and the weak intellectual tears their own mind asunder. For those who escape the Asylum, it is sometimes enough to make one consider voyaging back to their cell.
After all, only a few are Chosen.
In the lower levels of the Undead Burg, a cloak of rat skin fluttered behind a walking corpse as they hurriedly turned the corner of a short length of stone stairs, slamming the shield of a hollow soldier against the ground just as the claws and fangs of the first hound rose to meet it. In truth he lacked the strength to properly defend himself with the thing, to raise it with only one arm and withstand a blow with the same, but it didn’t matter here. The lower corner of the shield lay braced against the bottommost of a length of stone steps. This, with his shoulder pressed against the shield’s top, made progress against him nearly impossible for a foe so light as this.
If idiocy was to lose one’s common sense, then it couldn’t account for the stupidity of an undead hound. The corpse raised a spear over the shield and swung it downward in a pathetic arc, the wood slapping against the metal with hardly a noise to report. Seeing the motion, the dog leapt sideways out of some horribly trained reflex, and in this manner crashed into large pile of eternally burning corpses. It yelped as the heat caught it, spasmed as it searched for purchase amidst the mass of charred bones and melted flesh, and promptly died. The commotion brought with it the sound of distant footsteps, and soon another beast had run headlong into the shield. This one took two similar “attacks” of the spear to repeat its fellow’s mistake, and the one after it four.
To think he had once been terrified of these things, and discovered his tactic in panic.
Beside the steps was a well, and (after a moment to ensure no further dogs were coming), it was this against which the corpse laid his heavy shield. The next test between him and his goal would require agility, something ill-afforded with such heavy hardware. For this, he turned his attention to the well’s crank, and set thereafter to turning it. From the depths was raised a target shield tied in place of a bucket, and upon it a collection of bones, a severed hand, a ring, and a candlestick. The corpse laid the miscellaneous treasures aside, untying the shield and equipping it to his left arm.
The first two thieves were marked by buckets… or rather, the buckets were set in place to tell the thieves which doors were to be hid behind. As travelers came and went, the buckets would roll down the hill as they were knocked aside or blown by the wind or carried around by the dogs, and thus the thieves’ stations would move. When it was determined one had rolled too far down the decline of the alleyway, an annoyed thief would inevitably carry it to a more desired station, pretend it had always been there, and hide themselves behind the newly marked door. It was possible some band of thieves set this tradition in place long ago and retained the habit after they’d eventually gone hollow, but proving this thought today would be nearly beyond impossible. The reasoning didn’t matter to the corpse, of course, but the effect he used to his advantage.
The tops of the doors he adorned with knives from the Lady of Moss- blades up, such that the forceful opening of the door would spin the knives just right to sink their poisonous bile into the victims below. What additional wastes and acids the corpse had applied need not be mentioned by name, only that they shared their patron creature with the leather cloak on his back. With his work done, he now walked the side of the alley as any clueless traveler would have, and awaited the springing of the trap.
As always, the third and lowermost thief signaled the attack by kicking open their door. The two now behind the corpse followed, and shortly thereafter issued their raspy exhales of pain amidst the clatter of falling steel. The corpse charged. The leader hurriedly reached for their throwing knives but was swiftly force-fed the edge of the corpse’s shield, thusly to be brought to the ground. Here was the corpse’s blade drawn, its cracked and jagged tip turned down towards its latest prey.
When skinning rats, it is important that one carries a sharp blade. This both to pierce the thick hide, and to avoid unnecessary damage to the intestines, stomach, and other usable bits lying beneath. Replacing the rat with a hollow, the corpse preferred the tip of a broken straight sword to the edge of his usual dagger. The motions made indeed bore some crude similarity to his work when harvesting leather, but the abandon of care became only more evident with each forceful cut and flailingly resisted gouge. In the end, what remained could hardly be discerned from a spot of muck on the road, a hollow-faced madman above it.
Further down, beyond a second set of stone steps, was another favorite spot of ambush for the thieves. The mutts at the end of the alley had long since devoured whatever scraps had been used to position them, and so readily charged forth at the beckoning call of the corpse. They found at his feet the now separated legs of the corpse’s most recent kill, adorned in many fresh gouges and oozing with a pungent liquid. The source of this meal mattered not to them, and so they eagerly set to work engorging themselves on the new flesh. So single-minded were they, intent on ridding themselves of the insatiable undead hunger that plagued them, that neither one slowed as a white foam began to pour from their mouths. Their stomachs first bulged, then split apart and spilt what little they had for content as the acid worked its way through. Their legs gave way from beneath them, first the hind, then the front, and yet still they desperately swallowed more of the decaying flesh and embedded stomach-skin pouches that rapidly digested them in return. When at last the pair had at last lost such strength as to no longer reach the meals inches away from their first gasping, then whining maws, the corpse delivered their mercy. A swift kick, and what little remained of their necks gave freedom to their lifeless skulls. The thieves, meanwhile, bore no challenge the corpse had not already faced. Knives over the first few doors, the greeting of jaw and shield, the pillaging of another victim. Nothing unusual, and nothing of note.
With the capra demon gone, some “chosen” adventurer having long since vanquished it from realm, little now stood between the corpse and… her… save only one thing. The corpse took the last flight of stairs three at a time, ricocheting off the wall on the outside of its only turn and bounding towards his target.
There she was, out in the open as always. The corpse sprinted down the stairs and, after passing a blind corner, set his left foot forward and crouched to halt his considerable momentum. The ambusher behind him was easily parried as he brought his shield up and behind him, cracking something in their forearm or perhaps their wrist. Not bothering to waste time, the corpse’s broken blade was brought upwards through the ambusher’s jaw until it snapped the bit bone between their eyes. This done, the corpse wrenched his weapon up and sideways with a hollow “pop” as the neck gave leave of its skull. The body collapsed to the side, its head twisting unnaturally upwards and backwards as it freed itself of the blade. The corpse, unbothered, bore no interest in holding either aloft. Now he turned, inspected the last of the thieves, and after a moment returned his blade to its holder.
“You are Patient.”
This first time he’d uttered the phrase, the last word was merely an attribute. ‘Twas a description of the one hollow that could be shot with any arrow, afflicted with any pain, and would yet remain loyally in her position. To be fair, it wasn’t for great gift a choice, as the position of “live bait” was reserved only for whichever of the thieves had been deemed least desirable by the rest. What caused this, and whatever penalties lay for abandoning of the post, were matters the corpse could only assume. The important part was that it was her, the thief who had become “Patient” by name. At their first encounter the corpse had considered dispatching her like the rest, but had hesitated in piercing her skin. He still bore the scar about his neck that she had given him for his idleness, and she still wore the rat skin “grieves” he’d forcefully tied to her for a marker. As time passed, the two gradually traded more scars and more black fur hide between them- the corpse receiving the former, Patient gaining the latter. He had stripped her and tied a pelt about her chest which lay now beneath her leather armor, he’d fashioned a double-thick leather stock to protect her neck, and though he tied gloves to her at a point she’d taken great effort in cutting them off. All this he had done across many visits, through much pain, and at expense of his best materials. Todays gift had by far been the hardest to craft- a thrice layered leather helm affixed on one side with a jawbone to replace what he’d broken so long ago.
His approach was slow, and well-rehearsed. At about ten paces, Patient’s patience finally broke as she ran for him. Today she chose to hesitate upon reaching him, though he'd learned this was by chance of random choice than any form of compassion. The corpse waited for the attack, not daring to kick another outcast as he had once been in life. She tried first her more viscous pattern, a pair of vigorous strikes that slid across the corpse’s target shield rather than bouncing away. She completed the maneuver and immediately prepared for a more powerful, slamming attack, granting the corpse the opportunity he had been seeking.
As she brought her blade down, the corpse deftly batted her strong hand away and gripped her shield with his open hand. Having no further need for his own shield, he cast it now away and spun the patient thief ‘round. She made as if to leap upward and over the corpse, but the maneuver was one he’d long since learned to counter. He stepped back, spinning himself so as to bring her sideways and around and down into a prone position with his right elbow along her back and his left hand pinning her knife arm down.
His next task, before gifts could be given, was to ensure he received no further scars in return. Placing his knee at her back to free one of his hands, he drew from beneath his cloak a coil of red twine fashioned from the same rats he’d skinned for his gift… some of the same, at least. With great effort, the twine was managed around the thief until she could no longer terribly well resist, and her hood was pulled back from her head.
Seeing the sunken red skin, the glowing eyes, the bare teeth, it reminded the corpse of life in the Pit of Outcasts. It was there he’d met the kindest of the living, the most desperate of the poor, and occasionally even a soul or two willing to speak or come close to him. ‘Twas a place for the diseased, the undead, and those criminals deemed too vile to disgrace the hangman’s noose with their neck. It was there he’d learned to knit and to sew, skills gifted to him from an undead woman not terribly discernable from the one before him now. The main difference, at least for now, was the slack jaw broken in uncountable pieces during their first encounter.
Casting the memories aside, the corpse set to his work. The leather about the thief’s neck stilled her head a little, but precisely cutting the skin beneath her jaw to remove the old bone was still a difficult task. The end result was unsightly, and it involved more than a few excessive cuts from the patient’s constant struggling, but it was enough to work with. Removing the old bone took a great deal of time thanks to the many fragments hidden in odd bits and pockets of flesh, but sliding the new one into place and wrapping it in the old muscle proved as easily said as done. The most tiring part was retying the cuts back closed, as the thief regained and continually demonstrated a greater ability to bite and snap as the corpse made more and more progress. The last of these gaps closed, the corpse finally wrapped the rest of the leather helmet about the thief’s skull and tied the loose end to the other side of her new jaw with more twine. It wasn’t his best work, but it was the best he’d done on something still kicking around.
Patient’s hood was returned to its proper position, and the corpse took hold of a length of twine connected to a slipknot in the middle of her back. Midway up the last stretch of stairs he’d come down, the twine was pulled and the knot it held gave way, restoring the thief her freedom. Knowing better than to stick around, the corpse fled to the top of the stairs, standing on the bridge overlooking her station just beyond where she would pursue. He watched as she freed herself of the last of the twine, as she looked to him, and as she eventually returned to her post. He said then the same thing he always said to her, though still he knew not if she recognized it.
“I am Aldin Paltry, the Leper of Hangknell. I will return again.”
He watched a moment more, but was paid not a glance in return. Back through the alley he went, bound for the dragon’s bridge.

Hey guys!
I have been on 60mg for maintenance insomnia since 2016. Actually, it was 100mg, but I managed to lower it over past 4 years.
However, especially during last 12 months I have been experiencing restless legs and it is getting worse.
What usually helps is eating something. But not too much - if my stomach is too full I don't get the sedative effects and can't sleep at all. If I have bad digestion, eating prevents me from getting effects too.
So I usually take seroquel on empty stomach, then eat a cucumber lol. Recently I had to eat more than that.
It's hell.
What should I do? It's destroying my life.
I believe I can't turn to my pdoc as her recipe for discontinuation is super fast, no tapering (been there, I had to do it by myself with previous medication).
I also take fluvoxamine. I have anxiety, depression. I also started taking agmatine and NAC, which seems to be helping for anxiety. I even think the RL is even worse since then. The less stressed out I am, the more potent sedation is and the more potent RL are.
Any help is much appreciated.
Maybe I could split the dose? Like take first half in evening and second sometimes round 2 am?

Hi guys, Firstly thank you in advance for your valuable time & advices.
Background : no assets at all nor father is working now as he recently got treated with by pass surgery and the vein from which leg took was infected and due to that since past 6 months every day going through dressing. Again few days back my father faced some swelling in one hand which doctor said that it was due to medicines and said to need to be treated with a injection. I also have my older sister lucky to have her but my parents want to do her marriage asap as she got aged.
I am loving a girl since my undergrad before judging it love or not. I feel loyalty matters. So I just want to stay there because all the time I really feel privileged to have such kind of love My bad luck as always. After one year into this her father died and her mother found out about us.
I want to purse ca just I know that they paid well but due to financial issues unable to and joined engineering out of nowhere. Selected ece as people said that you can choose hardware or software.So I did not have knowledge about it. During my engineering tenure I collected more backlogs nevertheless to set things right. I cleared all and became first one from dept to get oncampus job. The prof of dumbness I have is that I don't know about IIT nit until my campus recruitment training after 6th semester but I saw lot of posters and ads about them but never have info about them.
I did not join my campus job as her parents need assets which I don't have one. I thought I need to join some product based company for higher package and also I feel like I love doing coding but after 2 months of graduation my father came to me and said to earn some as due to covid he is not getting any work. So I selected mnc over mindtree just because it has lower bond period but as soon as I joined in rush to make money tried digital exam failed twice which wasted 1 year but next 6 months I cleared it but they took 5 months to release ther score. So 2 years completed like this I realised and don't know what to do. Upon observing my colleagues pursuing ms I thought it might have give me better chance to make her parents accept me. So I started preparing in a way to graduate as soon as possible earliest I can join is spring 2024 intake. In this application process my father got hospitalised as I want to leave job I did not added my parents for health insurance. So all the saving vanished anyway I got rejections from all colleges I applied due to I applied late and also have backlogs. I even applied to some top 300 univs for ms in cs because I really want to challenge my self and to prove myself that I do have more caliber. Then after that tried for summer intake but then realised that no colleges were there in summer hence again applied lately to fall 2024 again same story rejected from which I want to pursue like suny buffalo, unv of Georgia & unv of south florida.
Recently, I got admission to University of albama at birmingham for ms in CS which costs me around just 46 lakhs for tution fee itself cuz they gave me extra course and extra tution fee ( integrated masters program. Not exactly direct ms in cs admit ). With expenses it might go upto 60 lakhs I think and they gave me one time scholarship of 1.5k.I need to pay deposit of 2000$ around 1.70 lakhs which I don't have so I need to take loan to pay this and also to pay processing fee to get loan sanction letter. I think I need to take for visa slot, travelling ticket fee etc..
So this is it guys I don't know what to do really. Since graduating in rush to ear some assets did not think clearly and did not take any good decision. I don't have anyone to give them clear picture to take informed decision I know most of them will say to stay here. Anyway now
Pros of ms in cs : 1. I will learn computer science which I think I like but not sure. 2. If I get job I think it will atleast give me some chance to have conv with her single parent mother.
Cons : 1. Huge loan and don't have anything to back it up. As my father health not totally good. I can't help him for 2 yrs I think financially. 2. Need to learn like someone preparing for upsc because I thought this is only thing that differentiate me from other who are knowing pursing and doing part time parllely.
Stay in India
Pro : 1.Atleast I can financially help my family though my sister supports now but my parents want to get her married but there is so many complications here too. 2. I don't have that huge loan burden
Cons : 1. I need to get into 24 Lakhs package. at least to stand in front of her mother to ask her to consider in a 6 months or so but market is so shit. 2. I won't get chance again to learn something and that college life
Dont know what to do literally even while I am pursuingy ms I don't have guarantee that her parent will wait until my graduation. Unable to take any decision feeling like lost and not able to do anythin except routine tasks. Wasting every night and day sleep. As I am from witch I don't have experience except on AWS and lost all my knowledge on proframming languages too and don't have much knowledge on DSA too.
Please be kind.

I’m currently 21w pregnant and I was wearing tight (ish) socks today and when I took them off there was a CLEAR difference in my legs & feet.. I pushed on my leg with my finger and it stayed imprinted for a minute… am I dehydrated or should I be worried ? Maybe going on walks more and drinking more water will help?? Looking it up, I’m unsure if this is severe or a dehydration issue.. (This is the first time I’ve made it this far in pregnancy and I’m unsure if I should be worried or if I should try walking and drinking more water & see if it gets better?)

Link for all the chapters available here: Engines of Arachnea on Royal Road
Zildiz felt her exomorph go rigid as it lost contact with her central nervous system. Curse that wretched Leaper! She’d forgotten just how durable their physiologies were. Their exomorphs had three times as many backup systems as those of Gallivants, unsurprising given that they had to retain control over their complex musculature. She’d been a fool for thinking that merely cutting it in half would do the trick. The error would wind up costing her life in these next few moments unless she took drastic action.
She was blind—her helm and its sets of eyes had sustained catastrophic damage and left her soft innards exposed. Even worse, she was crippled, the exomorph’s augmented muscle fibers unresponsive to her nervous system's inputs. But perhaps she still had the sheer physical strength to swing her blades. Zildiz tried to flex her wrist and was rewarded by a vigorous twitch of her pinky finger. Just in time; she could hear the Leaper close by, the leaf litter crackling as it approached.
Not yet, she told herself. Just a little closer. Hands pawed at her face and tore off the remnants of her helmet, scraping the hemolymphic gel from her naked face. What the hell was it doing? Zildiz had to restrain herself from crying out and striking at the air in panic.
Not yet! It was a crime to interrupt a fool when he was digging his own grave. Zildiz lay perfectly still as the Leaper fiddled around with her exomorph, feeling helpless and violated as never before. Vowing to give the bastard a slow and painful death for this, she curled her hand into a fist and waited until she felt its fingers caress the surface of her innards. Letting out a scream of incoherent rage Zildiz thrust at her unseen enemy, heard a cry of pain and the Leaper stumbling away, swearing profusely.
“Ow! That hurt, you witch! What the blazes are you?” the Leaper cried out. Zildiz frowned. That hadn’t sounded like the croaking of a Leaper. Speaking a slow and halting fashion, she replied:
“I would ask you the same thing.”
“I am Rene Louvoture, assistant navigator, 9th Battalion, 3rd Pathfinder Regiment.”
Zildiz shook her head at the string of gibberish.
“I am Zildiz, of the Blade-Wings. Why haven’t you killed me?”
“Why would I?" said the voice, sounding both shaky and incredulous, “You’re just like me, aren’t you?”
“How so?”
“Open your eyes and see for yourself.”
Zildiz realized with a start that it was referring to the primitive ocular organs of her innards. The thought hadn’t even occurred to her. The last time she’d been out of her exomorph was when she and Menash had been together, many cycles ago. With great effort her atrophied facial muscles remembered how to lift her eyelids, and she beheld a world of total darkness.
Bioluminescent growths from the surrounding vegetation gradually helped her to see with her naked eyes, and she beheld the prey-form standing over her with a hand clamped to its bleeding shin. Its albino exoskeleton was ripped and stained with blood. In its fist it clutched a short blade that emitted a constant, low hum. Zildiz propped herself up on her elbow and locked eyes with the creature. To her disgust she found that its exomorph had a completely transparent helm allowing her to see its bare face in all its lumpen hideousness. It had a head of curled black hairs, matted and moist like the growths on a Leaper’s belly. The prey-form’s flat, broad nose gave it a singularly pugnacious look, while its skin was as milk-white as that of a flesh-eating maggot’s. Zildiz dragged herself back, her first instinct being to recoil from it.
“Don’t move,” Rene advised her, “You’ve suffered some sort of spinal injury, I think. Can you feel your legs?”
“No,” Zildiz lied, thrusting out her chin at him defiantly, “What do you care?”
“I told you, I’m not about to kill you. We’re the same, can’t you see? Human!”
“We share the primal pattern, but I am a Gallivant. You are not. That is all that matters.”
“Right,” Rene sighed and sat down on the rotting log, “Whatever that means. Ye gods, I need a stiff drink right about now.”
Zildiz eyed him suspiciously, convinced it was some sort of ruse. He was just gauging how crippled she truly was and waiting for her to lower her guard. Very well; two could play at that game. In the meantime, she would try and work some feeling back into her exomorph.
“Are you really a hatchling?” she asked it suddenly.
“You heard that nonsense, did you?” Rene glanced up, “Of course not. I was just leading them on. The ‘fire giant’ isn’t a living creature, it’s a machine—a Divine Engine. What, don’t you have them wherever it is that you come from?” he joked, smiling at her. Zildiz grimaced at the sight, and he stopped.
“A machine,” she said slowly, “Like this one?”
Zildiz gestured at her disabled exomorph. Rene chewed over that piece of information. So that was what she was wearing: a living machine, a sealant suit of chitin and muscle equipped with weaponry and capable of flight. Like the Engine, it was a level of technology he hadn't even known could exist.
“Not exactly,” he finally replied, “I mean, it isn’t quite as revolting as yours. No offense,” he added quickly, snatching a quick glance at her face. She had a hawkish look about her, all thin lines and edges, but somewhere in there was a wild and timeless beauty which defied his attempts to pin down as some definable quality of womanhood.
“So you have been inside of it,” she confirmed with a look of satisfaction.
“I didn’t say that,” Rene stammered, feeling like he was losing the battle for information, “I merely observed it from a distance. I mean, the sheer size of it. Who wouldn’t have? You saw what I—what it—did to the Amit mound.”
Rene bit his lip, mentally kicking himself for his careless slip of the tongue. Zildiz narrowed her eyes at him, partly out of mistrust and partly due to the head-splitting migraine she was feeling. It had been so long since she’d been forced to rely on this basic sense organ, and its rods and cones were out of practice.
“The grey behemoth, this Divine Engine, as you call it. Did the Vitalus send it to cull the colony? Are you a Hollowore?”
“A Hull-of-War?” Rene repeated dimly.
"A Inkarnid? An Aspect of the All-In-One?"
“Look, I haven’t the foggiest notion what you’re talking about. And I’m the one asking questions here, don’t you forget it. Flame and perdition!” he swore, “You really nicked me, you know that?
Rene set his sword to aside and bent over to poke at the shallow stab wound on his shin. Zildiz chose that moment to burst into action. She was on her feet before he knew it, slicing at him with her blade arms. Rene yelped and rolled backwards off the log, narrowly avoiding dismemberment and flipping over nimbly to his feet, cursing himself for letting her gain the upper hand.
“Stop! Please, I don’t wish to hurt you!” he shouted at her as he ran circles around the dead tree, keeping it between himself and her wicked blades. Her movements were awkward and ponderous, as though her legs weren’t used to supporting the weight of her body. Scowling wrathfully, Zildiz kept after him as he jogged just out of her reach, the two of them playing a very earnest game of ring around the rosy. Finally Rene had enough and took up the club again, whacking her on the back of the knees so that she fell forward onto her hands. Her nose flattened itself against a pebble, producing an indescribable pain. She groaned and clutched at her face while Rene sat on her back to keep her pinned down.
“Sorry! Sorry! I really am. But it seems at this point to be abundantly clear,” Rene shouted as she flailed at him ineffectually with her blades, “That I have no other option but to take you in!”
“Just try and feed me to your brood, I dare you!” she screamed as blood trickled from her nostrils, “I’ll carve out their eyes and feed it to them!”
“What? No! That’s not it at all!” Rene cried, mortified, “As a soldier of the Fleet, I am hereby placing you under arrest as a hostile belligerent. Henceforth, you may consider yourself my prisoner of war!”
Link for all the chapters available here: Engines of Arachnea on Royal Road

i get them pretty often but usually i don’t feel any symptoms, they just randomly show up in the ultrasounds and the doctor is like “you have another cyst.”
there was only one time where i actually experienced pain, and i only noticed it existed when it ruptured. my vision went weird, i felt dizzy and like i was going to pass out from the pain, and i felt like i was going to throw up.
my first one was 7.5 lbs when i was 14 years old, and i had to get immediate surgery to drain it and reconstruct. luckily i have not had one big like that ever again, but my surgeon said i was lucky it did not burst because i would have died.
well, my doctor thinks i have one again, and this time i actually am experiencing symptoms (which i did not ever experience before a rupture), and it’s very uncomfortable.
it feels like so much fullness in my uterus and when she poked in those areas… it hurt so bad. sometimes it hurts so bad i feel like vomiting when i’m anxious or stressed or on a bumpy road, and moving in general makes it more noticeable. my legs are shaky and i’m constantly tired because i just am in so much pain. even laying down is uncomfortable, too. i am just constantly uncomfortable.
i have an ultrasound for it on friday but i’m just so frustrated and sick of these cysts.
i want to be cyst free so bad and i have cried too much lately over potentially needing an internal ultrasound and also a repeat of when i was 14 with surgery, because it required a catheter and i have PTSD with my lower region being touched.

So I've been shaving the tops of my thighs and all my lower legs, even that takes like an hour combined to do. The main issue the back of my thighs. It takes too long and I can't figure out the correct path either. So I'm looking to get an electric shaver. Any suggestions?

I (22F) have had issues with sciatica since I was 16/17, however it was only right leg aching and usually cleared up with stretches and time.
However, I signed a pro rugby contract last year and took a serious knock in a match and now I have the pain down both legs, especially my thighs. But the biggest issue is I have very accuse lower back pain which hurts all the time now. Especially when I bend down, sneeze or cough.
I have a physiotherapist with my team, who’s said to use ice and heat every day and given me strengthening stretches to do. I also have an appointment with a muscle skeletal specialist soon.
My question is: is there anything else I can be doing to help my recovery? My job is very physical and I want to get back to playing. I’m finding it very frustrating.
Any advice would be welcome.

Hi, pretty long post, just want to share my story as reading all of yours has helped me these last few weeks, f(28). After Thanksgiving 2021, so early-mid December (I was 26 at the time), I somehow herniated a disc. Before this happened, literally right before, I was hurting with what I think was a pulled lower back muscle (hurt to sit and lay down but pain was only in my back right side and rest helped, something I dealt with several times in my life starting in like 7th grade, drs always said it was a pulled muscle). After about a week it was feeling better so I decided it was safe to roll onto my right side to sleep. Well, after that I started experiencing pain all down that side, I also had some tingling and slight numbness in my foot and ankle. It was bad enough that I wasn't comfortable for more than 20 minutes, standing was the least painful, lucky to sleep 3 hours at once even though I'd wake up in horrible pain, basically always in tears from the pain and discomfort. I went to the dr after a few weeks and was told it's sciatica and he referred me for an mri, gave me some kind of shots and ibuprofen. I don't remember what the shots were but they took away all of the pain for 8-10 hours and I was able to get some much needed sleep. One may have been toradol but I got a shot of it the day of my mri so laying on my back during the scan wasn't too uncomfortable, and it didn't help much.
About 2 months after my symptoms started, I finally got the mri and it showed a decent sized herniation. I don't remember exactly where it was in my low back, but I was then referred to a neurologist who evaluated me and suggested ESI, he was fairly certain it would get better on it's own and I wouldn't need surgery, he said it may or may not decrease in size as well. The ESI worked as far as I can tell, but at this point it had been about 3-4 months of healing on my own using heat, stretches, and ibuprofen and the pain was mostly gone, lingering around a 2 at it's worst, but 0 after the ESI. The tingling in my foot and ankle had gone away and I was slowly getting back to normal. Aside from the occasional leg muscle cramps and discomfort laying on my right side, I had been pain and symptom free for about 2 years. I went on vacation in June last year, we did a lot of walking and even a steep hike. I worked for a year and a half in a dispensary, on my feet a lot as well as bending, squatting or leaning down, lifting heavyish totes. I had no pain or symptoms from this. I was hopeful that it had healed up and I was going to be perfectly fine, but I was still mindful of my back. I quit working last year in September to go back to school, since then I had been generally sitting or laying most of the time doing homework, of course I still helped around the house and went out to do stuff. I just wasn't moving nearly as much as when I was working. I had also gone on a trip to Seattle in September where we walked almost everywhere. Again, no pain or symptoms.
That takes me to earlier this year, about late February or early March. I was doing alright, then I noticed my hips feeling a little sore, starting in the left then later on the right, like a toothache or a pinching feeling in the sides and sometimes front. I felt it most when laying on them at first. It also felt sore when I pressed certain areas on the side. It felt like my thighs or hips were a bit unstable, if that makes sense. I did stretches, no difference. One night, during a shower, I leaned down to move a bottle on the floor and felt a very slight twinge in my lower back. Still no back pain or symptoms down either leg though. I also had been randomly waking up with pain and stiffness in my right foot and ankle that would go away after walking on it. Naturally, all this scared me and I started sleeping only on my back with a pillow under my knees, no longer sitting cross-legged or with my legs tucked beside me on the couch, making sure I wasn't slouching and getting up every hour to walk for a few minutes, generally trying to take care of my back. I'm also sitting to get dressed right after most showers because of my hips and I'm nervous my legs will give out. I made a dr appointment early April and he suggested PT for my hips, he wasn't worried about my back or doing any imaging.
I started PT April 15th. She evaluated my hips, had me do some stretches (most were laying down with my knees bent, putting pressure on my low back, I'm wondering if this caused my situation) and gave me stretches to do at home 2x day, appointments 2x week for a month. I should also mention during her evaluation she pressed on my lower back and it sucked, no pain down my legs, just under her hand. The stretches helped my hips for the first week, then my lower back started getting stiff and sore when I would lay down for a few hours or more. I mentioned this to my PT, but she didn't say anything. I kept up with the stretches (on a thick mat on the floor at home, or on my bed) and my lower back slowly got worse each day. Finally, after about 4 PT appointments and 2 weeks of stretches I quit doing them. My back was in quite a bit of pain, I started occasionally getting tingling and slight numbness down both sides in my lower calves and feet (sometimes together, sometimes either side) and it was painful to lay and sit longer than an hour. Made another dr appointment, he suggested it was my muscles and told me to ice, take ibuprofen, and gave me Diclofenac 1% gel, assuring me that PT wouldn't likely cause or worsen a herniation. I was with a different PT for the next appointment and she tried a TENS machine with a heating pad for the pain after I did some stretches that didn't seem to bother my back. I didn't notice any difference. That same night I went to the ER because I got up from a nap and the tingling and numbness wouldn't go away so it scared me. They gave me a steroid shot, a steroid pack, a few T3's and 325mg Tylenols as well as an MRI referral. I don't know if the steroids helped or just the overall more aggressive and earlier treatment this time, but my pain and symptoms (despite being on both sides, not just the right side) aren't nearly as bad as the first time, yet. I'm still uncomfortable and having a horrible time, but it's been manageable. Hopefully I don't feel any worse after being off the steroids for a while. I finished them last Thursday (May 9th) and I've been taking the 325mg Tylenol as needed, making sure to take 2 before bed, I took all the T3's as needed. PT since has been focused on pain management, deep heat ultrasound, TENS machine and heat, also k-tape which seems to provide a small difference.
Yesterday morning (the 13th) I woke up to my back feeling a little stiff and sore but I'd been trying a few stretches the last couple days, maybe that's what's causing it so I'm gonna stop for now. I'm sleeping alright, thankfully, naps as I need or can. As my back has gotten better, my hips haven't. There's still a pinching toothache type of feeling in the sides and front and my thighs still feel unstable while I walk sometimes. I can't lean back on the couch, sitting in the car is uncomfortable so I keep the seat up straight, laying down I still feel pressure in my low back but it's been bearable enough to sleep so far. I haven't tried walking for longer than an hour at a time, slowly and carefully, it doesn't bother my back so much as it does my hips. I lay down for a break during the day if I need it, though I try not to lay down too much. I get up and walk around a bit every hour or so and I help with housework when I can. I use ice or heat for 15 min when I feel like it. I try to go to bed only when I know I'm sleepy so I don't just lay there. I sit outside in the Sun and try to distract myself from the pain the best I can by doing whatever. But lately, being up straight most of the day has been making my upper back a little sore and sometimes I feel what might be spasms along my back (a tense pain that goes away after a few seconds to minutes) and some cramping sensations in my legs.
My MRI is scheduled for the 20th, I'm hoping with all my heart that it's nothing horrible. I've been keeping a log of my symptoms and writing down questions for if I go back to the neurologist (which I would like to). Again, I apologize for the super long post, I just hope this helps someone feel less alone and scared. I know I've been feeling pretty awful the last three weeks, I can't imagine how you who have worse pain feel. I have so much anxiety and fear about this and all the possibilities and it makes everything so difficult. I'm 28, almost 29, and with luck, I have 50-60 years of living left and there's so much I want to do, without anxiety of injuring my back or being in constant pain. This is one of the scariest things I've ever gone through because it seems like it can get complicated really fast and really easy, no warning. I'm not giving up hope that I'll be alright, but it's hard when you get worn down through the day and feel so many different scary symptoms. Hopefully they make some kind of medical advancement in the disc herniation department that truly helps the pain or at least effectively reduces reinjury chances.
TLDR: Sharing my story, had a lower back disc herniation in Dec 2021 causing horrible sciatica all down right side. Had ESI a few months later even though pain was minimal at that point, got better and was generally pain and symptom free for about 2 years. Symptoms came back after a few weeks of PT for unexplained hip pain, this time it's effecting both sides. Been dealing with it for about 3 weeks now with various treatments, MRI scheduled for the 20th.

The Inukpak (giant person) or Inukpat, in plural, are everywhere. They travel easily as they are 8-20 feet tall and they can look like a literal giant person, or like the classic ape-like Bigfoot creature that most people know of today. As a hunter, I have been trained by my Dad, my Uncles, and many other relatives to be able to track, spot minute differences in the soils and trees that can show me where animals are, and I also have pretty great eye sight to accompany that. In my short 24 years on this planet, I have seen a lot and traveled all over the Brooks Range (AKP base-iiuraq), and even gone as far away from home as the UK, but in my travels, I have almost always encountered some form of supernatural phenomena, entities, or other forms of spiritual presences. Most of which, happened in the mountains I call home. In the years of 2014 to 2018, I was very lucky and curious, so I spent most days after school out in the country and exploring the small valleys and the tops of mountains everywhere that I went. Even though I am a bigger guy, I was usually able to go up 2-3000 foot mountains in just an hour to hunt if needed. One day, I had left to go fishing in August. The caribou had not arrived yet and it was warmer than usual. Most August days are fairly chilly and the temps can range from 30°F up to 60°F. But on that day, it was in the high sixties and the mosquitoes were still running rampant, which is really weird for fall time. Fall is usually around August to September up here as we transition to winter quickly. On that day, I left in the morning and didn’t expect to see anyone, but the trail ahead of me showed some signs of recent vehicle traffic. In the village, we use vehicles like the XTV Argo and Honda Foreman or Can Am fourwheelers to get around everywhere and the trail looked like it was roughed up by the wide tire of an Argo. From then on, I just kinda went along with the idea that there were others ahead of me and I would need to be careful. So I traveled for a while and I came to a place called Aklagviiraq (idk what it fully means, but it has to do with a bear). And when I got there, I thought I saw a bear walking on the side of the mountain. I kept traveling, but I opted to take the lower trail to avoid the giant beast up on the mountain. Though I’m not terrified of the things, I prefer not to deal with them when I’m alone. When I got to the lower trail, I looked up to see where the bear was and I realized it was standing on its hind legs, or so I thought. I picked up my binoculars and started to scan the tundra and as I laid eyes on the brown-fur-clad being, it looked at me. The face of an Inupiat man stared back at me. But this wasn’t my cousin or anyone I knew. They were GIANT. Like 10 feet tall giant. They waved their arms like they were trying to get me to come over, but I noped the F out of there and never spoke of it to anyone. At first, it had been walking bent over like a bear. Like it was on All fours, but when I saw it, it looked like a human. I personally believe I saw one of these giants that my cultural stories speak of.

Timestamp: https://imgur.com/a/dCW22Ws
https://imgur.com/a/JsZJ6Cd
Colt M16A1 Upper with Del-ton 1:9 Chrome-Lined lightweight barrel. Needs front sight post and muzzle device. The rail on the bayonet lug is removable. Handguards are Brownells
Catch and release, unfortunately my FFL is charging an arm and a leg to transfer an A1 lower so I am shelving the build.
$330 for Paypal F&F, $340 for G&S

TW: blood loss, retained placenta
Well I got my home birth vbac, plus much more than I bargained for!
I'll begin by including that today is my actual due date so baby boy was right on time and I was full term. I'd had bouts of braxton hicks and prodromal labor off and on for the last few weeks, with one very convincing false alarm last week, resulting in me calling the midwife and her assistant over. She checked me out and I was sitting at 3cm, fully effaced but there were no other signs of progress.
In the days leading up to yesterday however, I had passed some noticeable mucus clots and was spotting a bit here and there. I tried not to think about it too much because I know you can lose the plug well before labor and I was just hoping at that point that it would be painfully obvious when I finally went to real labor.
So yesterday I couldn't catch any rest whatsoever. I wasn't sleeping great at night so I had taken to just napping as needed around the clock. But yesterday I couldn't nap for the life of me. I had this nagging anxiety that I really needed to rest so I ended up taking unisom around 5pm and making myself go to bed. I proceeded to wake up every other hour either hungry, thirsty or needing to pee. This is uncharacteristic for me because usually once I fall asleep, I'll stay asleep for at least a few hours. I was miserable.
I dozed off again and around 10:30, a contraction woke me up. It was a bit more intense than braxton hicks but it didn't have the same searing intensity as the worse contractions last week. So I got up and started pacing around to see if they would ease up. I rotated through a series of exercises meant to keep baby in a good position (a la Turning Babies) and they didn't seem to let up so I finally started timing them around 11. They were averaging less than 5 minutes apart and lasting about a minute.
This was starting to feel real. I called my husband who was working late and said he needed to get home asap because I was fairly certain things were really happening. I continued timing the contractions for a full hour and sure enough, they were staying steady so I called my midwife over. From here on out, my sense of time is super vague and warped. I really knew it was finally happening because I suddenly understood what they mean about not being able to walk or talk during a contraction, plus I felt like I was in this liminal space of being and nonbeing - like I was hyper aware of my body and the pain, but I was removed from it in order to cope.
By the time the midwives got to our home, my husband and best friend were there, I had already labored on the toilet, in the shower and on the couch in rounds. They took one look at me and knew it was real, and immediately took turns helping me and setting up the birth pool. I'm guessing I labored in the pool for about 5 hours, because it was ready around 2am and I stayed in there until after the rose. The pool really helped my labor progress and at one point, my midwife noticed that the sounds I was making were getting lower, more intense and drawn out.
She checked me again and sure enough, I was at a 6 and counting! She said, "Now might be a good time to call your moms, we might have a baby soon!" I think it was around that point that my water broke as well, as there was a good bit of mucus and bloody show floating around the pool. Our moms showed up shortly after, along with my teenage son, and I labored a while longer, taking turns holding our moms hands. They kinda started making me anxious so I got out and slowly moved through various labor techniques. Ultimately, I ended up sitting on the couch with my legs up on the midwife's legs, holding myself behind the knees with each push.
After about 12 hours of hard labor and no medication other than some motrin and ginger, he crowned with a beautiful head of curly dark hair! My sweet boy was born a couple pushes later and I immediately knew that I had torn. The ring of fire is a whole other ball game when you tear. The midwife tried to wait for the afterbirth to come away for about thirty minutes but each time I pushed I lost more blood. I started getting dizzy and losing color and we ended up at the hospital for 4 blood transfusions and to surgically remove the placenta.
I was too out of it to get the full run down if the placenta was actually fused to my uterine wall but they were able to get it out quickly in a 15 minute surgery. They were worried that it might be fused to my c section scar and if that was the case I would've ended for a partial hysterectomy. After the surgery I woke up cold and shaking profusely, begging for blankets and a warm compress for my boobs because they were so cold they were like hard as rocks. After they tried to warm me up I spiked a fever, plus losing so much blood had deflated my veins so they had stuck me all over trying to test my blood volume after the transfusions.
I was in surgery and recovery for a good while so the baby was with daddy and fam the whole time. They rode in the ambulance with me and when we got to the hospital we asked if they could give the baby donor milk. They said we'd have to admit him in order to do that and I was hesitant but they've been really respectful of our wishes. I said no vaccines, no bath, no circumcision, no formula and no taking him from us. We're just now letting them take him to the nursery so we can get some sleep. It was pretty hairy there for a while but we made it and he's perfect 🤗
Tl;Dr had an amazing physiological birth but tore severely and had a retained placenta. Ended up in the hospital for blood transfusions and surgery to remove the placenta.

For all this, I want to mainly focus on strength training.
I have two primary goals: Building my legs, and building up my glutes.With building my legs in particular, I want to emphasize on hamstrings, calves, quads. As a side note for glutes, I do want to work up towards doing weighted squats and deadlifts To supplement, I want to throw in general exercise to give my lower body a break. This can, and has ranged from arms, to back, to abs and such. I want to modify my previous routine to weed out parts that are too much for me at this time or ill-thought from an exercise point-of-view.
My previous workout routine was this(not perfect because I stopped working out like a year ago):
Leg curls - 3 sets, 15-20 reps Leg extensions - 3 sets 15-20 reps Butterflies - 3 sets, 12ish reps Weighted dumbbell squats - 3 sets, 15 reps Arms rows 3 sets - 3 sets, 15 reps on both arms Tricep extensions - 3 sets, 12-15 reps Bicep curls - 3 sets, 12 reps Weighted hip thrusts - 3 sets, 20 reps
I later learned that those amounts of sets/reps are way too much for someone like me who is an exercise amateur. So, how much should I shrink that by, and how do I build up my intensity over time without plateauing or putting myself in the way of injury?
Another avenue I have questions about is diet. What are some good resources to become aware of healthy fats, and resources to find some healthy meals and all that kind of stuff? I know the basics of what makes a healthy meal but I’m still relatively new to it when it comes to shaping my diet to go in tandem with working out.
That’s about all I can think of at this point, but yeah, I just want to fix up the routine a bit and get back to it!