I cant feel pain if i dont exist. I would much rather have never been born but beggars cant be choosers so i might as well make do with the next best alternative. I have existed for 21 years, i have no prospects, no close confidants aside from the one person whose heart i broke and in turn broke mine, and no sense of direction or motivation. I made a choice i thought would protect her from pain and disappointment, and ended up causing so much pain and disappointment she could no longer bear the idea of being with me. She could no longer see a future for us. We had spent so long discussing possible futures, destinations, careers, even fucking pets, and in one moment i ruined that reality, or possibly rather revealed its unreality. If she couldnt accept me at my worst, most shameful state, did she deserve to see me at my most proud? If there is a God he, she, or whatever fucking pronouns they use are a cruel manipulator on a cosmic scale. 1.5 years may be a blip in the eyes of some master creator but im barely 2 decades old and this shit has been a massive fucking chunk of my life so far. I know theres other people, i know the key to happiness is working on myself, but why should i even fucking bother when all i want is to devote my life to her? Some find solace in religion, praising and worshipping whatever deity some guy thousands of years ago pulled out of their fucking ass and maybe that brings them peace. I wish it did for me. I wish i was able to keep believing that some guy in the sky created an entire race of sentient beings out of fucking dirt and then somehow had a son with one of these dirt gremlins for the sole purpose of this son dying ‘for the sake of our sins’. I wish so badly this made sense to me. Maybe then i could direct all my energy to that and find purpose in it. But i dont. And i cant. It just makes no sense to me. Id rather put my energy and soul into someone i can perceive, after all perception is the only confirmation of our reality. I cant see some sky daddy up in the clouds, but i can see her. I worshipped her, i praised her. If there was a God it took shape in her. They say he made us in his image but the only proof of that i can see is corrupt, selfish, and altogether destructive to itself and the world he supposedly created for it to foster. If we are the image of God then he is a vile, ugly, sadistic being. I remember learning in school about tragedies, and their main defining trait is that they revolve around the downfall of the protagonist due to a flaw of their own they were unable or unwilling to overcome. Humanity is a fucking tragedy. The only animal cursed with the knowledge that we are slowly decaying. What kind of existence is that? Im supposed to find purpose knowing im just a sack of atoms with an unknown expiry date? How do i live knowing everything and everyone around me will not only cease to exist at a certain point, but if our mess of a species manages to make it into any sort of distant future, most of us arent even likely to be remembered? I hate sentience, i hate existence, and i hate pain. I hate the way my heart aches when i see her. I cant seem to escape this prison of affection she has me in. i hate that i let myself be so vulnerable and then hurt her so badly she can no longer be vulnerable with me. I worked so fucking hard to earn her trust. It was a fucking grueling experience. And i would do it all again if given the chance. The looks of mistrust turning to a deep reliance, as i slowly peeled away the layers to her soul. She used to describe her trust as eggs she was putting in my basket, and the day she said i had all her eggs might have been the most loved i ever felt in my life. 2 weeks ago she told me i broke one of her eggs, and she had to take them back now to protect them. I dont think ive ever felt so much pain and remorse as i did in that moment. Not only for hurting the person i cared about most, but because i have to live with the fact that that unreality we had built together would stay that way, and it was all on me. I hurt her, and i hurt myself. I know theres probably someone out there with more shared interests, with more quippy one-liners, possibly someone im even more attracted to physically. But i just dont fucking care. What point is there in chasing that when it could all get fucked like this? I cant do this again. I wont do this again. Its too much. I think i might be done. One of these days i might finally get the fucking balls to do it. ive been so scared for so long. The afterlife, my family and friends, her. But fuck it. My parents see me as the problem child, and they wouldnt even be fucking wrong. My siblings barely know me and i barely know them. Visiting home is like a hotel where im constantly reminded of how much of a failure i am and all the ways everyone around me is better. And im genuinely not even jealous. I could care less about any of my cousin’s lifestyles, or my sisters much better academic performance and artistic skill, or my brother’s athletic prowess. I really am happy for them, they all deserve it and more given the work theyve put in. The only thing i give a shit about is the fact that i get treated less because of these things. I just want to be able to live my life without being put down for choices that im happy with. I just want genuine fucking support, and when i fail to not have it shoved in my fucking face as if i dont already feel like enough of a shit sack. I dont need a 6 figure salary i need a fucking support system. A small but significant part of me holds a deep resentment for my parents for actively choosing to bring me existence. When i get the fucking chance i might just have to take that existence into my own hands and strangle it away, but for now im too much of a fucking pussy to try. I dont even know how id do it. I want it short and painless, almost instant if possible. I dont want any chance of survival in the form of life support, so maybe looking into a dnr would be useful but i dont even know where to start with that. Ive heard of a trick with the car exhaust, but i dont own a car and i dont want anyone finding my dead body in their vehicle. I just want an easy death, life has been hard enough. I feel like im tipping over the edge

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My (26F) neighbors (30sM) and his two kids (10-13ishM) have been playing football in my front yard for as long as I can remember since my husband and I moved in two years ago. This always has made me uncomfortable because (1) they could knock a window, and we just spent 14k replacing all our windows and (2) I have two large garden beds in the front lawn that have sensitive flowers growing and I get nervous about the football hitting and knocking over my pots. There are many other grassy areas to play in that aren't my front lawn in the neighborhood (we live in a HOA townhome zoned community but all the homes are single family and detached from one another). They don't have a big front lawn in front of their own house, which is directly behind mine and our backyards share a fence, and they are my next door neighbors. But they do have a big grassy area out beside their house that isn't in anybody's front lawn. There is also a park with a ton of grassy area behind our neighborhood (less than a two minute walk) that is attached to the elementary school and available to play in outside of school hours (It's Sunday, btw)
I just went out and asked the dad and kids to play somewhere else because I'm nervous about them damaging the flower beds that I work really hard on or the new windows (by accident of course, ik they wouldn't do it on purpose, but they're kids, ya know? And i've seen them knock over my plants with a football before from the ring camera).
The dad asked "Can't we play in the grassy area here?" And I explained, no, it's my front lawn, and I'm nervous about property damage.
I feel like an asshole though.....
AITAH?

I used to never sleep as a kid, since i had a horrible household and night time was the only time i ever got to myself. Id stay up for hours in the dark reading, watching, texting people or listening to music. Its the only time i wasnt paranoid, or being bothered or harassed.
Sometimes id stay up for three days straight since there was just so much for me to do and catch up on.
Obviously this left me with a horrific sleep cycle and at last, eyebags. My eyebags were just a deep purple and sometimes bloody red. People in school would ask me if i put makeup on my face to look like that on purpose.
As i got older, i kept up the cycle of just going through the motions during the day, and then staying up late and enjoying myself late at night. It was comforting and all ive ever known.
I get around 3-5 hours of sleep each night.
This leaves me with prominent, veiny eyebags in which you can literally see my skull. Its ruined my face. Ive never really been pretty or attractive and this just pushes me even lower.
I dont really have a point to make. Thanks for reading

Posting because I just need some clarification on if I overreacted towards my MIL or if I have every right to go NC. Sorry in advance for such a long post.
For background I’ve been with DH for 10 years in October and we have 3 bio-kids together. DH never dated HCBM she got pregnant with SD after they slept together a few times and were just having “fun”. In the beginning his mom would come to our house and say little things that seemed a little inconsiderate to my feelings about how DH and BM were such good friends (DH denies that they were ever friends) and how she wishes they could of worked it out. Also, our 3 bio kids are girls too and every time I told MIL the gender of our babies during pregnancy she would say hurtful things about how it’s too bad that he’s not having a boy. These statements are especially hurtful because I have a son from a previous relationship that DH has been involved with since before he was 2 and my son refers to DH as his dad. DH has told his mom many times that she needs to be respectful and kind to me and we’ve even had short periods of not speaking to her because of her unwillingness to admit any wrong doing and continues to play victim.
Now for HCBM, DH has always expressed to her his want to be more involved as a parent but she constantly acts like he’s not good enough to be SDs dad and has tried to replace him for the entirety of this little girls childhood. DH has a squeaky clean record and is a phenomenal father to all of my kids so I’ve never understood this especially because she’s been arrested for child abuse in the past (abuse against her ex’s child not SD) and lost custody of SD for probably half a year. When they were going to court HCBM didn’t let DH see SD for a year and moved a little further away so he couldn’t get 50/50 when everything was said and done because her school was too far. During that time MIL also didn’t hear from her despite reaching out and in court HCBM basically said MIL lived in a shit hole and didn’t want her daughter at her house. She’s also tried to lie about other things in court like saying DH had never even met his daughter and so many other things I can’t even remember them all right now. It just seems like she’s constantly out to make us miserable.
But despite all of that MIL and her have become fast friends since their parenting plan became finalized. I know that I can’t control other peoples relationships but what bothers me is that when my husband ask MIL a simple question about if his daughter was over there the other day she said “yes but I don’t have to inform you of what she does on her mothers time” this also isn’t the first time that she’s done something like that and I’ve tried to kindly explain to her that her son wanted more time with his daughter and if she’s seeing her then she could at the very least give him a heads up and maybe offer some of that time to him. It does absolutely no good to explain calmly to her so when she said that to him I lost my cool and told her that she’s delusional and if she can’t be respectful of our wishes to at the very least be notified of when she’s seeing SD then she will no longer have contact with my kids since she doesn’t respect their parents our entire family will go NC with her and she told me that she only sees them when it’s beneficial for us anyways which couldn’t be further from the truth. I feel like she basically chose SD and HCBM over my kids and it hurts knowing she’s so comfortable disrespecting us but would never say those things to HCBM. Also we didn’t limit her time with SD when SD was with us she could have visited or ask us to drop her off at any reasonable time and we would have. There’s just been too many occasions where we’d hear from one of our other kids that SD was at nana’s today or from other people that DH’s mom had SD the other day and we had no clue.

I know a lot of people use kings hunting for example. Here is what I found
This is what Valmiki Ramayan says:
तस्मिन्निति सूखे काले धनुष्मानिषुमान रथी व्यायामकृतसंकल्प: सरयूमन्वगान्नदीम
' व्यायामकृतसंकल्प: ' means with the aim of exercise.
He says that it was a good day,hence i went to the banks of Sarayu River to do some exercise.
So one thing is clear,he was there to exercise,and not to hunt or kill any animal.
Now lets see what follows:
अथान्धकारेत्वश्रौष जले कुम्भस्य पूर्यत: अचक्षुर्विषये घोष वारणस्येवनर्दत:
It was dark at that time,i was not able to see clearly. Then i heard a voice of an animal,i thought its an elephant.
Now where is Hunting and Deer written here? Nowhere…its just TV serials show.
Kings used to catch and capture elephants for their army. Dashrath also wanted to capture that elephant,and he shot an arrow which by mistake hit Shravan Kumar. He had poisoned arrows which could make the elephant lose his senses,but it hit a human,who could not bear its poison.
This is what Ayodhyakand,Valmiki Ramayan says:
ततोअहम शरमुध्दत्य दीप्तमाशीविषोपमम शब्द प्रति गजप्रेप्सुरभिलक्ष्यमपातयम
तत्र वागुषसि व्यक्ता प्रादुरासीव्दनौकस: हां हेति पततस्तोये वाणाद्व्यथितमर्मण:
Dashrath says-”Then to get the elephant i shot a poisoned arrow.I heard a crying voice of a human from the direction in which i shot the arrow.”
So please start to read Valmiki Ramayan,don't waste your lives in lies and TV serials.
Thanks.
Next many people say that hinduism doesent allow or disallow meat.
Yes.
The Sanatana Dharma Teaches First That We should not Kill Animals Or Eat Any Type of Meat.
References -
Quotes that disapprove, even denounce, meat-eating
Rig Veda:
“One who partakes of human flesh, the flesh of a horse or of another animal, and deprives others of milk by slaughtering cows, O King, if such a fiend does not desist by other means, then you should not hesitate to cut off his head.”
Rig-veda (10.87.16)
Do the Vedic literature allow meat-eating? Did Hinduism adopt vegetarianism from Buddhism? - The Spiritual Scientist
Manu-Samhita:
“Meat can never be obtained without injury to living creatures, and injury to sentient beings is detrimental to the attainment of heavenly bliss; let him therefore shun the use of meat. Having well considered the disgusting origin of flesh and the cruelty of fettering and slaying corporeal beings, let him entirely abstain from eating flesh.”
(Manu-samhita 5.48-49) “He who permits the slaughter of an animal, he who cuts it up, he who kills it, he who buys or sells meat, he who cooks it, he who serves it up, and he who eats it, must all be considered as the slayers of the animal. There is no greater sinner than that man who though not worshiping the gods or the ancestors, seeks to increase the bulk of his own flesh by the flesh of other beings.” (Manu-samhita 5.51-52)
“If he has a strong desire (for meat) he may make an animal of clarified butter or one of flour (and eat that); but let him never seek to destroy an animal without a (lawful) reason. As many hairs as the slain beast has, so often indeed will he who killed it without a (lawful) reason suffer a violent death in future births.” (Manu-samhita 5.37-38)
“He who injures harmless creatures from a wish to give himself pleasure, never finds happiness in this life or the next.” (Manu-samhita 5.45)
“By subsisting on pure fruits and roots, and by eating food fit for ascetics in the forest, one does not gain so great a reward as by entirely avoiding the use of flesh. Me he [mam sah] will devour in the next world, whose flesh I eat in this life; the wise declare this to be the real meaning of the word ‘flesh’ [mam sah].” (Manu-samhita 5.54-55)
“He who does not seek to cause the sufferings of bonds and death to living creatures, (but) desires the good of all (beings), obtains endless bliss. He who does not injure any (creature) attains without an effort what he thinks of, what he undertakes, and what he fixes his mind on.” (Manu-samhita 5.46-47)
“By not killing any living being, one becomes fit for salvation.” (Manu-samhita 6.60)
Do the Vedic literature allow meat-eating? Did Hinduism adopt vegetarianism from Buddhism? - The Spiritual Scientist
Mahabharata

1. “He who desires to augment his own flesh by eating the flesh of other creatures, lives in misery in whatever species he may take his [next] birth.” (Mahabharata, Anu. 115.47)
   
2. “The purchaser of flesh performs violence by his wealth; he who eats flesh does so by enjoying its taste; the killer does violence by actually tying and killing the animal. Thus, there are three forms of killing. He who brings flesh or sends for it, he who cuts off the limbs of an animal, and he who purchases, sells, or cooks flesh and eats it–all these are to be considered meat-eaters.” (Mahabharata, Anu. 115.40)
   
3. “The sins generated by violence curtail the life of the perpetrator. Therefore, even those who are anxious for their own welfare should abstain from meat-eating.” (Mahabharata, Anu. 115.33)
   
4. Bhishma started, “Numberless discourses took place between the Rishis on this subject, O scion of Kuru’s race. Listen, O Yudhisthira, what their opinion was. (Mahabharata, Anu. 115.7)
   
5. “The highly wise seven celestial Rishis, the Valakshillyas, and those Rishis who drink the rays of the sun, all speak highly of abstention from meat.
   
6. The self-created Manu has said that the man who does not eat meat, or who does not kill living creatures, or who does not cause them to be killed, is a friend of all creatures. Such a man is incapable of being oppressed by any creature. He enjoys the confidence of all living beings. He always enjoys the praise of the pious. The virtuous Narada has said that that man who wishes to multiply his own flesh by eating the flesh of other creatures meets with disaster. (Mahabharata, Anu. 115.9-12)
   
7. “That man, who having eaten meat, gives it up afterwards wins merit by such a deed that is so great that a study of all the Vedas or a performance, O Bharata, of all the sacrifices [Vedic rituals], cannot give its like. (Mahabharata, Anu.115.16)
   
8. “That learned person who gives to all living creatures the gift of complete assurance is forsooth regarded as the giver of lifebreaths in this world. (Mahabharata, Anu. 115.18)
   
9. “Men gifted with intelligence and purified souls should always treat others as they themselves wish to be treated. It is seen that even those men who are endued with learning and who seek to acquire the greatest good in the shape of liberation, are not free of the fear of death. (Mahabharata, Anu. 115.20)
   
10. “What necessity be said of those innocent and healthy creatures gifted with love of life, when they are sought to be killed by sinful wretches living by slaughter? Therefore, O King, know that the discarding of meat is the highest refuge of religion, of the celestial region, and of happiness. Abstention of injury [to others] is the highest religion. It is, again, the highest penance. It is also the highest truth from which all duty emanates. (Mahabharata, Anu.115.21-23)
    
11. “Flesh cannot be had from grass or wood or stone. Unless a living creature is killed it cannot be procured. Hence is the fault of eating flesh. The celestials who live upon Svaha, Svadha, and nectar, are given to truth and sincerity. Those persons, however, who are for satisfying the sensation of taste, should be known as Rakshasas [flesh-eating demons] pervaded by the quality of Darkness. (Mahabharata, Anu.115.24-25)
    
12. “If there were nobody who ate flesh, then there would be nobody to slay living creatures. The man who slays living creatures kills them for the sake of the person who eats flesh. If flesh were not considered as food, there would then be no destruction of living creatures. It is for the sake of the eater that the destruction of living entities is carried on in the world. Since, O you of great splendor, the period of life is shortened by persons who kill living creatures or cause them to be killed, it is clear that the person who seeks his own good should give up meat altogether. Those dreadful persons who are engaged in the destruction of living beings never find protectors when they are in need. Such persons should always be molested and punished even as beast of prey. (Mahabharata, Anu.115.29-32)
    
13. “That man who seeks to multiply his own flesh by (eating) the flesh of others has to live in this world in great anxiety, and after death has to take birth in indifferent races and families. High Rishis given to the observance of vows and self-control have said that abstention from meat is worthy of praise, productive of fame and Heaven, and a great satisfaction itself. This I heard formerly, O son of Kunti, from Markandeya when that Rishi discoursed on the sins of eating flesh. (Mahabharata, Anu.115.34-36)
    
14. “He who purchases flesh, kills living creatures through his money. He who eats flesh, kills living beings through his eating. He who binds or seizes and actually kills living creatures is the slaughterer. These are the three sorts of slaughter through each of these acts. He who does not himself eat flesh but approves of an act of slaughter, becomes stained with the sin of slaughter. (Mahabharata, Anu.115.38-39)
    
15. “That wretched man who kills living creatures for the sake of those who would eat them commits great sin. The eater’s sin is not as great. That wretched man who, following the path of religious rites and sacrifices as laid down in the Vedas, would kill a living creature from a desire to eats its flesh, will certainly go to hell. That man who having eaten flesh abstains from it afterwards acquires great merit on account of such abstention from sin. He who arranges for obtaining flesh, he who approves of those arrangements, he who kills, he who buys or sells, he who cooks, and he who eats it, [acquire the sin of those who] are all considered as eaters of flesh. [Therefore] that man who wishes to avoid disaster should abstain from the meat of every living creature. (Mahabharata, Anu.115.44-48)
    

16 . “Listen to me, O king of kings, as I tell you this, O sinless one, there is absolute happiness in abstaining from meat, O king. He who practices severe austerities for a century, and he who abstains from meat, are both equally meritorious. This is my opinion. (Mahabharata, Anu.115.52-53)

1. “Yudhisthira said: Alas, those cruel men who, not caring for various other sorts of food, want only flesh, are really like great Rakshasas [meat-eating demons]. (Mahabharata, Anu.116.1)
   
2. “Bhishma said: That man who wishes to increase his own flesh by the meat of another living creature is such that there is none meaner and more cruel than he. In this world there is nothing that is dearer to a creature than his life. Hence, one should show mercy to the lives of others as he does to his own life. Forsooth, O son, flesh has its origin in the vital seed. There is great sin attached to its eating, as, indeed, there is merit in abstaining from it. (Mahabharata, Anu.116.11-13)
   
3. “There is nothing, O delighter of the Kurus, that is equal in point of merit, either in this world or in the next, to the practice of mercy to all living creatures. (Mahabharata, Anu.116.19)
   
4. “Hence a person of purified soul should be merciful to all living creatures. That man, O king, who abstains from every kind of meat from his birth forsooth, acquires a large space in the celestial region. They who eat the flesh of animals who are desirous of life, are themselves [later] eaten by the animals they eat. This is my opinion. Since he has eaten me, I shall eat him in return. This, O Bharata, forms the character as Mamsah [meaning flesh] of Mamsah [me he, or “me he” will eat for having eaten him]. The destroyer is always slain. After him the eater meets with the same fate. (Mahabharata, Anu.116.32-35)
   
5. “He who acts with hostility towards another becomes victim of similar deeds done by that other. Whatever acts one does in whatever bodies, he has to suffer the consequences thereof in those bodies. (Mahabharata, Anu.116.36-37)
   
6. “Abstention from cruelty is the highest Religion. Abstention from cruelty is the greatest self-restraint. Abstention from cruelty is the highest gift. Abstention from cruelty is the highest penance. Abstention from cruelty is the highest sacrifice. Abstention from cruelty is the highest power. Abstention from cruelty is the greatest friend. Abstention from cruelty is the greatest happiness. (Mahabharata, Anu.116.38-39)
   
7. “Gifts made in all sacrifices [rituals], ablutions performed in all sacred water, and the merit which one acquires from making all kinds of gifts mentioned in the scriptures, all these do not equal in merit abstention from cruelty.” (Mahabharata, Anu.116.40)
   

Do the Vedic literature allow meat-eating? Did Hinduism adopt vegetarianism from Buddhism? - The Spiritual Scientist
Bhagavata Purana:
“Those who are ignorant of real dharma and, though wicked and haughty, account themselves virtuous, kill animals without any feeling of remorse or fear of punishment. Further, in their next lives, such sinful persons will be eaten by the same creatures they have killed in this world.” (Bhagavata Purana 11.5.14)
The real purpose of a sacrifice was not to replace a slaughterhouse but to test a Vedic mantra by giving an animal new life. Animals were used to test the power of Vedic mantras, not for meat. - Srimad Bhagavatam 4.4.6 purport
Do the Vedic literature allow meat-eating? Did Hinduism adopt vegetarianism from Buddhism? - The Spiritual Scientist
Cow Sacrifice ? Not At All :
Besides References,Here’s What Supreme Lord Saying About Sacrifice -
CC Ādi 17.158 — As a learned scholar, the Kazi challenged Caitanya Mahāprabhu, “In Your Vedic scriptures there is an injunction for killing a cow. On the strength of this injunction, great sages performed sacrifices involving cow-killing.”
CC Ādi 17.159 — Refuting the Kazi’s statement, the Lord immediately replied, “The Vedas clearly enjoin that cows should not be killed. Therefore every Hindu, whoever he may be, avoids indulging in cow-killing.
CC Ādi 17.160 — “In the Vedas and Purāṇas there are injunctions declaring that if one can revive a living being, one can kill it for experimental purposes.
CC Ādi 17.161 — “Therefore the great sages sometimes killed old cows, and by chanting Vedic hymns they brought them back to life for perfection.
CC Ādi 17.162 — “The killing and rejuvenation of such old and invalid cows was not truly killing but an act of great benefit.
CC Ādi 17.163 — “Formerly there were powerful brāhmaṇas who could make such experiments using Vedic hymns, but now, because of the Kali-yuga, brāhmaṇas are not so powerful. Therefore the killing of cows and bulls for rejuvenation is forbidden.
—Ādi 17: The Pastimes of Lord Caitanya Mahāprabhu in His Youth
Srila Prabhupada Says - So killing, killing is very bad, but killing for the sake of right cause of fighting, or killing in the sacrifice, they are not sinful. Sometimes in the Vedas killing is recommended, just like in the fight or in the sacrifice, but that is not sinful. Sometimes a brāhmaṇa is sacrificing, offering, performing great sacrifice, and the animal is put into the fire just to give him renovated, new life, not for killing, just to test how Vedic mantras are being properly pronounced. That will be test. When sacrifice is done, the fire is there, and old animal is put into the sacrifice, and he comes out with a new body. That means the Vedic mantras are being pronounced very properly, and it is being carried out. This is the experiment, not for killing. Although in the Vedas there are recommendation that paśu-vadha system... Just like in the modern age also, when some experiment is made, it is made on the life of the animal. But they are killed. But when there is recommendation of putting an animal in the fire, that is not for killing; that is to see that this animal has got a new body.
Lecture on BG 2.14 -- London, August 20, 1973
Pradyumna: Aśvamedha-yajñas or gomedha-yajñas, or the sacrifices in which a horse or a bull is sacrificed, were not, of course, for the purpose of killing the animals. Lord Caitanya said that such animalssacrificed on the altar of yajña were rejuvenated and a new life was given to them. It was just to prove the efficacy of the hymns of the Vedas. By recitation of the hymns of the Vedas in the proper way, certainly the performer gets relief from the reactions of sins. But in case of such sacrifices not properly done under expert management, certainly one has to become responsible for animal sacrifice."
Prabhupāda: This is a long subject matter. But the sacrifice in yajña, recommended, that is not for killing the animal, but it is a testing, how the Vedic mantras are being properly chanted. Because an oldanimal put into the fire, by Vedic mantras he would come out again with young life. That is sacrifice of animals in the yajña. Therefore in this age there is no such expert brāhmaṇa who can chant the mantras properly or he can behave because the life is very abominable. Therefore, because there is no expert brāhmaṇa, so these sacrifices are forbidden in this age. Kalau pañca vivarjayet aśvamedhaṁ gavālambhaṁ devareṇa sutotpattiṁ sannyāsam (CC Adi 17.164). These things are forbidden in this age, because there is no proper men to conduct.
Lecture on SB 1.8.52 -- Los Angeles, May 14, 1973
The purpose of the Vedas is to establish such principles under the order of the Supreme Lord, and the Lord directly orders, at the end of the Gītā, that the highest principle of religion is to surrender unto Him only, and nothing more. The Vedic principles push one towards complete surrender unto Him; and whenever such principles are disturbed by the demoniac, the Lord appears. From the Bhāgavatam we understand that Lord Buddha is the incarnation of Kṛṣṇa who appeared when materialism was rampant and materialists were using the pretext of the authority of the Vedas. Although there are certain restrictive rules and regulations regarding animal sacrifice for particular purposes in the Vedas, people of demonic tendency still took to animal sacrifice without reference to the Vedic principles. Lord Buddha appeared to stop this nonsense and to establish the Vedic principles of nonviolence.
BG 4.7, Purport
Lord Buddha, a powerful incarnation of the Personality of Godhead, appeared in the province of Gayā (Bihar) as the son of Añjanā, and he preached his own conception of nonviolence and deprecated even the animal sacrifices sanctioned in the Vedas. At the time when Lord Buddha appeared, the people in general were atheistic and preferred animal flesh to anything else. On the plea of Vedic sacrifice, every place was practically turned into a slaughterhouse, and animal-killing was indulged in unrestrictedly. Lord Buddha preached nonviolence, taking pity on the poor animals. He preached that he did not believe in the tenets of the Vedas and stressed the adverse psychological effects incurred by animal-killing. Less intelligent men of the age of Kali, who had no faith in God, followed his principle, and for the time being they were trained in moral discipline and nonviolence, the preliminary steps for proceeding further on the path of God realization. He deluded the atheists because such atheists who followed his principles did not believe in God, but they kept their absolute faith in Lord Buddha, who himself was the incarnation of God. Thus the faithless people were made to believe in God in the form of Lord Buddha. That was the mercy of Lord Buddha: he made the faithless faithful to him.
SB 1.3.24, Purport
The horse sacrifice yajña or cow sacrifice yajña performed by the Vedic regulations shouldn't be misunderstood as a process of killing animals. On the contrary, animals offered for the yajña were rejuvenated to a new span of life by the transcendental power of chanting the Vedic hymns, which, if properly chanted, are different from what is understood by the common layman. The Veda-mantras are all practical, and the proof is rejuvenation of the sacrificed animal.
SB 1.12.34, Purport
According to sacrificial rituals, animals are sometimes sacrificed in the yajña arena. Such animals are sacrificed not to kill them but to give them new life. Such action was an experiment to observe whether the Vedic mantras were being properly pronounced. Sometimes small animals are killed in a medical laboratory to investigate therapeutic effects. In a medical clinic, the animals are not revived, but in the yajña arena, when animals were sacrificed, they were again given life by the potency of Vedic mantras. The word śipi-viṣṭāya appears in this verse. Śipi means "the flames of the sacrifice." In the sacrificial fire if the oblations are offered into the flames, then Lord Viṣṇu is situated there in the form of the flames. Therefore Lord Viṣṇu is known as Śipiviṣṭa.
SB 4.13.35, Purport
You can read more about the same:
Do the Vedic literature allow meat-eating? Did Hinduism adopt vegetarianism from Buddhism? - The Spiritual Scientist
Thank you.

I don’t know what to do with my life.
For the past 5 years(I think, I haven’t kept count) my life has been going downhill. Ever since my brother got his ADHD diagnosis I’ve felt like an outcast from my family. He goes around doing whatever he wants. Something happens, not his fault, always blamed on someone else.
Rather recently (a couple months back) he was annoying everybody at a family gathering, my uncle, very clearly joking, told him to stand in the road. And my brother the fucking idiot he is, sat in the middle of the road. And of course when we found him, my mum was crying about it. Blaming everyone other than him, because, oh no her precious baby boy (he’s 10) was told to stand in the road and he did. But it’s not his fault, he has ADHD. And in her eyes that means he is disconnected from any blame he should be given.
Another thing he does is he pushes my buttons, purposely, talking in my ear, even when I tell him to stop. He tells me to learn my place. And of course eventually I go off on him, sometimes I give him one round the jaw. And of course, my mum comes and consoles him, because it isn’t his fault, he has ADHD, which in her eyes means he can be a prick all he wants. I can hear her talking about me, ”oh he’s a bully.” Or, “he’s a terrible person.” There are many other instances of shit like this happening, but I can’t get into them.
So about my brother: he is now 10 years old, he can barely do anything, bad at reading, writing, spelling. And it’s all because he has ADHD, and the school aren’t doing enough to support him. (They are bending over backwards for him, we all are) He got suspended from school last week, all he got was a 2 day ban on the Xbox. When I was his age and I didn’t do my homework, I got a two month ban from the TV.
Now I know this seems like a rant about my brother, but I can’t halo but think. Am I really the one in the wrong? Am I really the evil person I’ve been made out to be? But this is just a little drop an ocean of problems for me. I’m gonna talk about all of them today because, why not?
My family has a history of alcoholism, My grandad died because of it. And a while back my dad was addicted to whisky, he said he’s stopped, but you can never be too sure. Apparently he was drinking one bottle a day. I looked in the bin one week, 10 bottles, and these were full sized bottles. I am scared to touch alcohol now, I know I’ll get addicted.
Another thing, I’m ugly. That’s it I’m just ugly, I try to make myself look presentable, but every time I look in the mirror I see one of the ugliest people I’ve ever seen.
I have a feeling, my friends hate me. I barely talk to them, and when I do, I’m usually the one starting the conversation, other than that, nothing. I barely have anything in common with any of them. It’s not like this with anyone else though, they all talk with each other just fine. When we don’t like someone in the group, nobody says anything to them, we just talk behind their back. ( I only do this to fit in and I think it’s really scummy) I have a feeling my friends talk behind my back as well.
Im not smart, or very athletic. To be fair, I’m more athletic then most, but not enough for it to make up for my lack of smarts, I always feel stupid.
I had a great time over on KimetsuNoYaiba but I fucked it right up. It was a great community over there, until I went over the edge, I started posting inappropriate stuff over there, I don’t want to go into it, but if you want to learn more, ask about the u/The_poggers_potato incident. After that happened they all hated me, and I wanted to redeem myself. I decided to wage war against the pedophiles of the community. Through the criticism of the pedos. I got myself a permanent ip ban on Reddit. I was using a different account every half an hour to get my messages across. But it wasn’t working. I made a new account, using a vpn, different email, different browser. And it worked for three days my Reddit account was safe. Until I posted on KimetsuNoYaiba, I was banned a day after, I realised someone recognised me and reported me. That’s when I remembered how shit of a site Reddit is, they would only ban me if the person who reported me was a mod on the community. I tried to redeem myself, but a mod and Reddits corrupt system has stopped me.
That community meant so much to me, and it’s not like it’s over, I’m still at war with the pedos, I haven’t given up. But at some point I’m gonna have to throw in the towel. And it’s truly a shame, being part of that community has made me the happiest I have been in years. But I’ve messed it all up.
To all the great people in that community I thank you. People like u/ApplePitou, u/OkBeautiful1480, u/Johxnny_ , u/Shadow_Huntress12, u/Scout_Trooper_77, u/The_Enmu_Man, u/99980, u/AntacidSpore44. All names off the top of my head, but there are many others too. They have made my day with the things the comment/say.
But I did ruin it for myself, screwed myself over again and again and again. And I hate myself, I don’t know what else to say. I don’t know where to go with my life, I don’t know if I want to go. But I guess I’ll have to see.

Help I feel like I am living in a parents nightmare! There are a lot of issues here so bare with me...
First of all, The most important part of this is my son told me a couple days ago that his dad and step mom both spank him and lock him in his room when he is in trouble and his dad threatened him by saying that next time he hits someone he better hope the cops get to him before his dad does because he is going to whoop his ass. I have asked my son before if his dad hits him and he has always told me no. but a couple weeks ago I saw a large bruise on his butt. I did ask him and he told me he didn't remember what it was from. I realize that I should probably call DHS or CPS but I know my son will not tell on his father and my son is currently at his fathers house and I don't want to cause him to get hit more if that is what is happening. I can see that he is scared of him and desperately wants his approval. Do I wait until my son is back in my care or will it look bad that I didn't report right away?
Secondly I need advice on the best course of action for proving that my ex is alienating me and trying to gain control of everything to make himself look like the more responsible parent.. Since getting divorced in 2022 I have had several issues with my ex husband regarding our child. First off our divorce hearing went not so well for me.. He had not seen our child except some weekends here and there over the course of a year and a half before we went to court but was hell bent on not paying me any child support so when it came time to discuss custody he asked for 50/50 and joint decision making and he got it. He made it seem to the judge that I had been purposely keeping our child away from him over that time and she bought it despite him having no evidence. I had no idea he was going to lie on the stand so I was unprepared and neither of us had lawyers. He still had to pay me some child support since I was paying for daycare but shortly after our divorce was final he enrolled our son in a different daycare and put him on his wife's medical insurance without telling me. I only found out because he took me to mediation to have his child support reassessed and he now pays me no child support. At first I thought that was his goal was so I was agreeable now I believe his goal is to get full custody of our son and remove me from his life as much as possible.
Since getting 50/50 custody his wife has been the one caring for my son. She picks him up and drops him off everywhere he goes except for exchanges at my house. She fills out any paperwork needed for my son including medical paperwork. They also repeatedly decide where he is going to go to after-school care, summer care, and sports without including me. I have reminded him repeatedly that even though he is paying he is still supposed to include me in these decisions and he always has an excuse why he thinks its ok that he doesn't. His wife signs consent on my sons paperwork as if she is his mother and leaves me off the paperwork completely. She doesn't even include me as a emergency contact. I also discovered that she has used my SS# on my sons dental paperwork under her name. The problem is because she is putting her info on the paperwork I cannot get copies of anything to prove it since it would be a hippa violation for anyone to give it to me. Can she really be giving consent for him as a step parent? especially for medical appointments. What can I do about it?
Over the last couple years my son has had behavior issues at school and is acting out aggressively towards teachers and the school counselor. My ex took this as an opportunity to enroll our son into a school in his district. (he was in mine initially). However was against our son going to therapy. I finally got him to agree to therapy after quite some time but demanded that our son go to one very specific place that does family therapy where my ex can be in the room with our son while he is there. He also demanded that our son go on Saturdays so that we can both take him separately since we alternate weekends. I got the referrals for therapists and chose a different one. My son loves her and he had major improvements in behavior until recently. She does not have weekends available but I welcomed my ex to come to therapy any time he wants and shared the therapists info and gave her his info as well. He is not happy and is still demanding I take our son to the place he wants and has been sending mean emails to the therapist questioning her ethics and telling our son that he is going to have her arrested. She is ready to quit because she is so uncomfortable.
Its worth noting that my ex also rarely allows me to have contact with my son while he is at his house. Does not allow me to pick my son up from his house for exchanges and will not share info about sports or activities that my son is enrolled in so that I cannot attend them.
They have both said things to my son to try to turn him against me. They have told him that he and I are not a family because I am not remarried or have a father figure for my son in my household. They have told him that I am mean to his stepmom and I don't want her around. They have even gone so far as to tell my son that his step mom is his actual mom and that he should not trust me. They also seem to be telling him that they are going to move away to the mountains at some point. Neither his dad or I are allowed to move out of our current county without going back to court first. I think this is why he wants full custody.
We only speak through talking parents so most of this is documented on there. I am unsure if resources like CASA or TESSA would be helpful to me? My ex was aggressive towards me while we were together but never hit me so I never reported him. I do not have tons of money to spend on a lawyer but I will take out a loan if I have to. I did hire a lawyer previously and they were not much help and I ended up firing them before any action was taken. They told me that it was unlikely that custody would be changed and that it is very hard to prove parental alienation or emotional abuse of a child. Someone has also suggested that I get an attorney ad litem.. Surely the things that he and his wife are doing are not allowed but is a judge really just going to give him a slap on the wrist and let things keep going the way they are? I really feel at this point that my son needs to be in my custody or at the very least I should have full decision making to stop his father from alienating me. What would be the best thing for me to do?

I'm a m21 student, just about a year away from finishing college. I've always lived in Philly and commuted to school these past three years. I have never really been immersed in college life for many reasons that I won't get too in-depth in. I changed my major to Psychology this year, and I'm not sure where I will take this degree, though what is really important to me is understanding myself and others for actions that sometimes don't elicit the answer someone is looking for. To shorten a story that could fill countless pages, my gf of almost 4 years broke up with me over a year ago and, before that (while we were still dating), my dad relapsed and disappeared from my life. I've been sifting through ideas relentlessly trying to figure out where my purpose lies and how it can be best expressed without her. In this process, I feel so stagnant. I know my worth, but I genuinely feel that she was as good as it gets. She told me that I was always going to be the one that got away, but she was the one who left. She also said after the breakup that, even though we are soulmates, I deserve more than what she can offer. Though, this whole year without her, I've found myself watching almost 50 romantic comedies, and I feel more at peace imagining the two of us in those films more than I ever will going out to bars, embracing college life, and moving onto someone else. I feel like Tom Hanks when he lost his wife in Sleepless at Seattle. I know someone is out there that I could be just as compatible with; I've just been growing really impatient letting fate determine things when I feel they have already been determined. We spent every moment we could together and revolved our lives around each other. I even chose the same college as her (she was a year older) for the sole reason that we physically & mentally couldn't be away from each other. I guess a cliche description of our relationship would be that we were high-school sweethearts. A memory that will forever be ingrained in me is when we took a trip in the summer to Oregon, stayed in some coastal towns (Astoria & Seaside), climbed some of Mt. Rainier, and had an unforgettable time in Portland. I feel like, if I went back and visited those same places again this summer, it would be a big step towards giving those memories the most justice I can. She left me in a time where I needed her most so that sort of forced me to see her in a different light, but I have always been able to see through that and understand her for who she really strives to be, and what she knows I know her to be. We haven't talked in months and she's basically blocked me out of her life, telling me she's seeing other people. I just think that, if I were to go back to any of those places, she would find out somehow through social media and possibly have a deeper understanding of just how much being in those places with her really meant to me, even if it's just me there this time. This would also be an opportunity to see if I would want to move there long-term. I do want to get out of Philly as soon as I can, and I care enough about every moment we shared to the point that I would live my life across the country in a place where we once pictured ours. If anyone can help me at this crossroads I've found myself at, it would mean a lot. Thanks.

\**Disclaimer:* THIS IS NOT FINANCIAL ADVICE*, any statement made or information shared is for informational purposes, and in no way telling, advising, or persuading anyone to decide their finances or investments. These are my conclusions based on my research. As always, I highly advise everyone to READ these resources for yourselves and do your OWN research. There is a lot of information shared to intentionally mislead you. Protect yourselves.*
\*Please be kind. In the end, this is purely a fun theory regarding 741. However, it does contain some relevant and useful information. Maybe I’m wrong, or you don’t agree, but I had so much fun researching and connecting the dots. Allow this to be additional information for you to know, if nothing else!*
\Lastly, very possible I may add edits. I’m juggling a lot of information right now and trying to piece it all together in a way that makes sense. My mind feels soupy.*
Now, to the good stuff.
I’d like to share an exciting find. I stumbled upon this as I was doing research for some SEC research and I hope it lifts your brow as it did mine.
As most of you know, there’s a lot of speculation and adopted significance to the number 741, and I think I figured it out. Actually, if there really is any significance to 741, I’m almost POSITIVE this would be it.
Allow me to introduce you to Delaware’s General Corporation Law. (DGCL)
For those of you that are new, or don't know, the DGCL is relevant because Delaware's corporate law applies to all Delaware corporations no matter where they are located.
GameStop is a Delaware corporation.
The DGCL is a corporate statute containing mandatory requirements. These are intended to protect investors and give corporations flexibility to carry out their business. The DGCL is considered a business-friendly statute that gives stockholders and corporations maximum flexibility in ordering their affairs.
Now that you understand what it is and why it matters to GameStop, I’d like to draw your attention to Title 5, Chapter 7, Subchapter 3, SECTION 741

TITLE 5: Banking Banks and Trust Companies
CHAPTER 7. Corporation Law for State Banks and Trust Companies
Subchapter III. Conduct of Internal Corporate Affairs
• § 741. Bylaws, adoption, amendment and repeal.
- A corporation may adopt bylaws for the proper management of its affairs, and may establish regulations controlling the assignment and transfer of its shares. The first set of bylaws shall be adopted at the meeting of the incorporators, as provided in § 727 of this title, but thereafter the power to make, alter or repeal bylaws shall be in the stockholders, provided that any corporation may, in the certificate of incorporation, confer that power upon the directors.

[https://delcode.delaware.gov/title5/c007/sc03/index.html\]
In simple terms, this is the statute that the foundation of the SEC filing on Mar. 17, 2024, stands on.
Now, I didn’t detail my theory, but I mentioned it in the discord that I suspected I found the connection for the 741 theory, and that it had to do with the SEC filing. It was brought to my attention by some friendly apes in the discord that the 741 theory is old, not new. Originating from the beginning times of RC in GameStop. I’m glad they brought up that point because this leads to my next confirmation. This point only further corroborates the theory.
Why? Because this most recent filing to SEC is ALSO old. Just as old as the 741 theory, actually. So let me remind you, that on Dec. 8, 2020, GameStop filed a practically identical S-3ASR to the SEC from Mar. 17, 2024. (I’ve seen FUD throughout Reddit claim that this just means the Mar. 17, 2024 one is nothing new or significant - that is incorrect and I’ll be addressing that as part of my next post) Anyways, this filing from 2020 was released a little over a month before the sneeze.
A-3ASR 2020: https://www.sec.gov/Archives/edgadata/1326380/000119312520312781/d50019ds3asr.htm
Notable mentions: ironically enough, while looking for 741 theory collections on Reddit that I could link to this post, I found a post that has a long list of collected theories, and one mentions U.S. Code, Title 11, Chapter 7, subchapter 3, SECTION 741, which is titled Stockbroker Liquidation
Website: https://uscode.house.gov/view.xhtml?path=/prelim@title11/chapter7/subchapter3&edition=prelim
Superstonk Post: https://www.reddit.com/Superstonk/s/sLAekPP4h1
Whoever came up with this theory was for sure on the right path, I wish they would’ve kept digging. Unfortunately, section 741 of Title 11 US Code only contains definitions, that define terms used in the following sections, so it doesn’t make too much sense. This did, however, inspire me to look at other laws containing 741, rather than just the DGCL I found.
I’m going to have to do a separate post regarding Security Laws at this point, but one interesting thing I found is the Dodd-Frank Wall Street Reform and Consumer Protection Act of 2010. This act was created specifically because of the 2008 financial crisis, as a means to hopefully avoid something like that happening again.
I found an interesting find that appears to clearly define and apply to what Robinhood did in 2021 during the sneeze. This section just so happens to be...741 (this is just a coincidental I’m pointing out, considering "741" originated before the sneeze and couldn’t have predicted what Robinhood would do)
Check it out though: Title VII: Wall Street Transparency and Accountability, Subtitle A: Regulation of Over-the-Counter Swaps Markets, Part I: Regulatory Authority, Section 741: Enforcement
https://www.congress.gov/111/plaws/publ203/PLAW-111publ203.pdf
I highly encourage you to check out these resources as well:
•Researching the Federal Securities Laws Through the SEC Website: https://www.investor.gov/introduction-investing/investing-basics/role-sec/researching-federal-securities-laws-through-sec-website
•The Laws That Govern the Securities Industry: https://www.investor.gov/introduction-investing/investing-basics/role-sec/laws-govern-securities-industry
For new investors, or new to the stock market -
•Introduction to Investing: https://www.investor.gov/introduction-investing
Now the question is, if RC meant for there to be significance with the number “741”, then why?
And if by these findings, the DGCL statute answers why, then what is the significance of this S-3ASR that’s 3 1/2 years old?
“741” easter eggs were RC’s way of leading us to the S-3ASR. Evidence that he hasn’t just been playing 69d chess, but dare I say… 741d chess. If this theory were to be true, this would offer reassurance that the details during and after the end game are already established. It’s all laid out in the S-3, the exhibits linked within it, and the 7 securities, particularly the last few, and within the sales agreement.
(I will be going into depth with the Mar. 17th filings soon, which with lay the entire thing out: how short sellers are trapped, the potential deal to give shorts an “out”, because what do we know about naked shorts? They need real shares to close. Hence, GME’s authorized shares coming in like a life raft [of course at the tippy top I hope because f*** SHF] making shorts in debt to GME, GME racks in the dough. There’s so much more to this, but I’ll reserve that for the next post. I’m almost finished with it and I will be including all the U.S. Codes and Securities Laws, as well as the SEC filings that are linked within the S-3ASR,
Which by the way, was just me following RC’s orders straight from the Mar. 17 S-3, which were as follows:

You should rely only on the information contained in this prospectus and any accompanying prospectus supplement or incorporated by reference herein or therein. We have not authorized any other person to provide you with different or additional information. If anyone provides you with different or additional information, you should not rely on it.
We encourage you to read our periodic and current reports. We think these reports provide additional information about our company which prudent investors find important.

To bring this all to a close: Do you know what a comfort letter is? It’s defined as this: In public offerings, underwriters generally request comfort letters to establish a due diligence defense to avoid liability for securities fraud. ( https://www.law.cornell.edu/wex/comfort_letter )
This is RC’s way of issuing, metaphorically, a corporation's version of a “comfort letter” to the SEC, in the form of the prospectus, its supplement, and the sales agreement. As means of protection from the shit show that WILL follow after the moon landing, and a strategically pre-established template to plug into after the MOASS.
Simply put, I conclude that 741 was RC referencing to his already in-place plan. It’s RC’s way of letting everyone know, HE’S GOT THIS.

So? Zen, my fellow APE’s. 🧘‍♀️🦍

As for me? I like the stock. I’m going to Buy, DRS, and HOLD 🟣💎🤲

Besides, I got a big trip coming soon, maybe you’ve heard? To the MOON 🌕🚀

^\Thanks for taking the time to read, and thanks for having me as a fellow APE.*)

“A social movement that only moves people is merely a revolt. A movement that changes both people and institutions is a revolution.”

-Martin Luther King

04.26.2024, HHS issued a whole lot of new rules on health care coverage -
HHS.gov-HHS Issues New Rule to Strengthen Nondiscrimination Protections and Advance Civil Rights in Health Care
This is just one small part of it -

• For the first time, the Department will consider Medicare Part B payments as a form of Federal financial assistance for purposes of triggering civil rights laws enforced by the Department, ensuring that health care providers and suppliers receiving Part B funds are prohibited from discriminating on the basis of race, color, national origin, age, sex and disability.

By just reading this very short statement, I am sure everybody would say, That’s great - but then when you get down to reading all the fine print which one only finds in reading the whole rule in the Federal Registry do you understand that there is gonna be a lot of cost to this for Medicare Beneficiaries to absorb in their Part B premiums and by proxy, into their Medigap premiums if one has chosen this way or the cost of their Medicare Advantage plan.
https://www.federalregister.gov/documents/2024/05/06/2024-08711/nondiscrimination-in-health-programs-and-activities
It will cost us all - Medicare Part B beneficiaries and our government - more money - so just be advised that your premiums will increase so stop asking why.

Happy Monday, Barkada --

The PSE lost 10 points to 6619 ▼0.1%

Today is MB's 5th birthday!
I'm not really a big celebrations guy, so I'm not sure how to mark the occasion, except to say that I'm thankful for your continued readership and for the community of great people that has grown up around the newsletter as the days turned into weeks, turned into months, and turned into years.
Want to see something crazy? Here's MB's very first episode.
For those who have been there from the beginning, thank you for guiding MB's development through all of my weird experiments over the years. Your comments, support, and willingness to help always leave me speechless.
For those who support MB on Patreon now and in the past, your generosity in paying for something that you receive for free is humbling. Your support has helped me build scripts, host my site, and pay for help.
For those who contribute to MB directly, like Jewel, and to all of my partners, Mike Tan of Vini.com, Ely Paclibar (Your REIT Buddy), and Investagrams, thank you for working with me every morning to stitch this newsletter together. It wouldn't be the same without you.
Today is something of a long episode, but I hope you'll indulge me on MB's birthday because I really hope that you'll like the segment about the team of traders that I've sponsored to enter the Trading Cup 2024 competition, and the review of Alternergy's STAR Investor Day presentation.
Hope you like it!

▌In today's MB:

• PSE suspends PNX, C, and INFRA
• Zobels sell remaining MWC holdings
• TC24: Introducing MB's Trading Cup 2024 team!
  • The Trading Cup competition
  • Meet Matthew, Jenny, and Sef
  • Good luck team!
• Alternergy's first public Q&A
  • Its growth strategy
  • Outlook of renewables market
  • Why it loves wind
  • When dividends?

▌Daily meme Subscribe (it's free) Today's email

▌Today's sponsor: DoubleDragon

▌Main stories covered:

• [UPDATE] PNX, C, and INFRA suspended for failure to submit Annual Reports... The PSE issued suspensions to three companies [link] prior to the open of trade on Friday morning for failure to submit FY23 Annual Reports. The three companies suspended are Phoenix Petroleum [PNX 4.17 ▼0.2%; 0% avgVol], Chelsea Logistics [C 1.30 ▲4.0%; 0% avgVol], and Philippine Infradev [INFRA 0.53 ▲1.9%; 0% avgVol]. AgriNurture [ANI 0.62 ▲8.8%; 305% avgVol] narrowly avoided suspension by submitting its Annual Report 38 minutes before the PSE’s suspension deadline. The ANI FY23 Annual Report disclosure erroneously reports a net income improvement of 1560% to ₱146 million, instead of a ₱146 million net loss, perhaps this oversight comes from a behind-the-scenes race to submit before the deadline.
  
  • MB: I’m married to an accountant who did the auditing grind for years, so I know that it’s not easy to put these reports together; they’re complex and knock-ons from problems in any of the subsidiaries can cause problems that ripple up the chain and back down. That being said, producing these annual reports is something of a bare-minimum condition of public corporate life. Every management group rides its accounting department and its auditing team into the dirt to get its quarterly and annual reports out on time. I don’t have any inside knowledge into why PNX, C, and INFRA are in this position, but I listen to the silence from these management groups. Good teams communicate with their minority shareholders in times of uncertainty, and a trading suspension is a time of great uncertainty for retail investors.
• [NEWS] **Ayala Corp sells remains of its MWC holdings to Enrique Razon for ₱14.5-B... Ayala Corp [AC 620.00 ▲1.3%; 131% avgVol] [link] disclosed that its subsidiaries, Michigan Holdings and Philwater Holdings, would sell their combined holdings in Manila Water Company [MWC 26.60 ▼1.5%; 123% avgVol] to Trident Water Company Holdings (TWC), which is owned by MWC’s current owner, Enrique Razon. The combined value of the two sales to TWC is ₱14.5 billion. The block of shares coming to TWC through Michigan Holdings was already processed and paid-for (~₱12.9 billion), and the remaining ₱1.6 billion worth of shares from Philwater Holdings will be purchased in installments over the next five years. AC confirmed that it will have no post-transaction common share interest in MWC, and that its voting stake will be “nil”.
  
  • MB: In a weird way, the transfer of ownership and control of MWC from the Zobel Family to the Razon Family is one of the only lasting “achievements” of the Duterte administration. I put “achievements” in quotation marks because it’s not clear how the President’s overreach into the public markets benefitted anyone other than the obvious (MWC’s current owner). As longtime readers of MB will know I have a deep respect for Mr. Razon’s business acumen and operational quality, but I don’t know that MWC customers have necessarily felt any change as a result of this transfer, and I don’t know that minority shareholders have felt any change either. So maybe it was just Mr. Razon in the right place at the right time while Duterte rode the media waves of threatening the Zobels with death and dismemberment? Yeah, it was a weird time.
• [TC24] Introducing MB’s Trading Cup 2024 team!...Merkado Barkada** is sponsoring a team of three traders to compete in Trading Cup 2024 hosted by Investa, where hundreds of traders will be competing for up to ₱640k in total prizes based on their trading performance with ₱300k in virtual currency across the PSE, US markets, and crypto markets. This is a long competition (it runs from April 22 through July 26), so we will follow the members of Team MB throughout the contest to check in on what’s working, what’s not working, and what it’s like on the front-lines of the country’s largest trading tournament. Let’s meet the team!
  
  • “Hi I’m Matthew. I’m a project manager in network engineering in the telecommjnications industry and an agency leader in one of the top global brands in insurance. I have been trading since 2016. Though I like momentum trading, I found more success in position trading because it is less volatile since I can only check my open positions during my free time.” Matthew is 37 and lives in Paranaque. Trading experience: PSE (8 years), US (1 year), CRYPTO (1 year).*
  • “Hi I'm Jennelyn. I'm a Civil Engineer by profession in a government organization. I started trading back in 2020 for a year. I was reckless back then, but I've learned a lot, I'd say. I stopped trading in 2021 to focus on my career and I shifted my trading journey to learning first. Now with the Trading Cup I've found another motivation to push through. I tried day trading, and it was really frustrating and draining, so this time I'm doing swing trading through price action and volume.
  • “My name is Sef. I'm currently in college studying Management. I've been mostly self-taught but over the years I took a lot of learnings from other people. I've tried a lot of strategies but most of the time I'm a swing trader. So, I try to look for strong catalysts and take positions within times of consolidations. My implementation of it during the competition hasn't been perfect, partly due to finals week. But I trust in the process. I've been trading in the PSE for 5 years now. I only started trading the US markets and Crypto, recently. I think my current performance in the competition is reflective of my experience within the three markets. [PSE: +17.4%, CRYPTO: +4.2%, US: -11.5%]. We still have a few months to go and it's still anyone's game. A lot of the top leaderboard right now is primarily driven by 1 or 2 positions that no one saw coming, I think you can guess which stocks I'm referring to.
    • MB: Welcome to the team, Matthew, Jenny, and Sef! My goal in founding Team MB is to give readers a little insight into the thought processes behind the winning and losing trades of each team member. We have a diverse group across age, background, experience, and trading style, so I think we’ll get some interesting perspectives on the markets as the weeks go by before the July 26 finale. The team members will get to keep 100% of any prizes that they win, along with a monthly stipend from Merkado Barkada for all the coffee/snacks needed to keep focus on all three markets simultaneously. Good luck, team!
• [NEWS] Alternergy conducts first public Q&A since IPO... Alternergy [ALTER 0.70 ▲1.4%; 159% avgVol] presented its Q1 results on Wednesday as part of the PSE’s STAR Investor Day event, and MB was there to document its first public Q&A with institutional and retail investors since its IPO over a year ago. For me, the most interesting component of any STAR presentation is the Q&A, because it’s where we get the chance to hear the management team talk outside of the the cold forensics of the financial statements to address the hope, fear, optimism, and pessisim of the average investor.
  
  • On enhancing shareholder value: The ALTER team said that it’s focus is on controlling what it can control, and that as a developer, it does everything that it can to complete projects “within the timeline and committed budget”, increase its pipeline, and build good relationships with stakeholders.
  • On its growth strategy: ALTER said that its “DNA is a developer”, and therefore its “preference is brownfield development” as opposed to acquisitions. (MB note: “Brownfield” means development on land that has been previously used for some other purpose. “Greenfield” would be development on untouched land.) The management team said that it is open to being “opportunistic” with acquisitions, but that its overall focus is on “looking for projects from the ground and building them toward completion.”
  • On outlook of renewables market: “The power industry is really at the point where there is a sustained pressure towards a price increase.” The ALTER team said that there’s a shortage of power supply, and what existing supply there is will come under pressure as power plants age or weather phenomena disrupt operations. ALTER said that it’s strategy is to simply grow its portfolio into this market gap, especially over the next two years.
  • On wind vs solar: The ALTER team was asked whether it was intentional to be “more exposed to wind rather than solar”, and ALTER responded by saying that while both wind and solar are scalable, they “like wind” because it generates more electricity per installed capacity. As the ALTER team put it: “For instance, if we build a 50 MW solar, you’ll only need a 25 MW wind project to match the amount of energy that we will be generating.” ALTER said that wind is also less intensive in terms of land use to generate the same amount of energy, and that its analysis shows that wind projects generate more cash flow than solar projects.
  • On starting to distribute dividends: *One question asked when ALTER would start paying dividends, and the ALTER team responded (after a laugh) that it’s “all about resource allocation”. ALTER said that at this stage, it’s a growth company, and that it would like to use its resources to build a “sizeable portfolio over the medium term” with the goal of “increasing shareholder value.” ALTER said that once it has achieved that goal, “dividend payments would not be far behind.
    • MB:Kudos to any management team that takes questions from the public. It’s not easy to be this communicative and transparent, but as a long-term investor, this kind of insight into the management team’s thinking and analysis of their own data and the market as a whole is important. If your trading style is technical, ALTER’s analysis of wind versus solar isn’t going to matter to you at all, but if your thesis is based on bets in the power generation sector, that response might trigger some research that could be helpful. Overall I’d say that the ALTER team did very well. It was clear that they were nervous, but over time I’m sure the team will become more comfortable with answering the questions and interacting with the investing community in such a person-to-person way. Well done, ALTER!

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On 04.26.2024, HHS issued a whole lot of new rules on health care coverage -
HHS.gov-HHS Issues New Rule to Strengthen Nondiscrimination Protections and Advance Civil Rights in Health Care
This is just one small part of it -

• For the first time, the Department will consider Medicare Part B payments as a form of Federal financial assistance for purposes of triggering civil rights laws enforced by the Department, ensuring that health care providers and suppliers receiving Part B funds are prohibited from discriminating on the basis of race, color, national origin, age, sex and disability.

By just reading this very short statement, I am sure everybody would say, That’s great - but then when you get down to reading all the fine print which one only finds in reading the whole rule in the Federal Registry do you understand that there is gonna be a lot of cost to this for Medicare Beneficiaries to absorb in their Part B premiums and by proxy, into their Medigap premiums if one has chosen this way or the cost of their Medicare Advantage plan.
https://www.federalregister.gov/documents/2024/05/06/2024-08711/nondiscrimination-in-health-programs-and-activities
It will cost us all - Medicare Part B beneficiaries and our government - more money - so just be advised that your premiums will increase so stop asking why.

Hi all
After a lot of procrastination, I intend on applying to law school in the fall. As of now my stats sit at 3.mid, 16mid, 4 years WE (5 by the time I’d enter in fall 2025). I’ve had a lot of personal family trouble the last year (deaths in the family) and one of my parents was recently diagnosed with cancer. I intend on retaking the lsat in aug/sep/oct (depends on when I feel the most prepared). I had a few misc app questions that I wanted to get some ideas about.

1. There are two schools in my area, both T-50 and have ‘why x’ optional essays. I don’t want to sound too like dramatic, but one of the reasons besides ranking that I am considering these schools is bc I’d still be close to my family during these trying times, as my parent goes through treatment. Would it be appropriate to mention this in a ‘why x’? Of course I have other reasons for attending, but this is truthfully one of the major factors. Is it too much? Does it come off weird? Would it be a potential red flag?
   
2. I can probs only secure 1 academic letter of reference from my undergrad since I’m nearly 5 years out. I think I can secure 1-2 work references from the firm I work at and 1 other work reference from when I was a teacher. Is it negative for mostly work rec letters?
   
3. 2 of the 4 yrs of WE are as a teacher before I quit bc of admin/sanity reasons. I currently work at a firm doing work that is interesting but not something I’m deeply passionate about for a personal statement. I want to write about my experiences as an educator and connect that to my why law. Would it look weird that I focus on that aspect of my WE as opposed to my more recent employment? I’m just thinking one potential issue is ‘how passionate about this can you be if you quit after two years and didn’t go back to education’ lol (despite still tutoring/working with students from my two years there even now).
   
4. I have quite a few Ws on my transcript and ended up taking a full medical withdrawal one semester for mental health reasons. It also affected my GPA as I probs should’ve taken more time off and gotten accommodations earlier. College was a bit difficult for me but I’ve got a handle on my health now. Any tips for writing an addendum for this?
   

Sorry if this is a bit ramble-y and ty for the help!!!!

Salam peeps, I just wanted to share beliefs / rules i follow as a sufi muslim. Please note that these are just the blueprint that my leadeshaykh (a very popular and well-qualified one) has provided us. We do not agree with what the salafis/wahhabis/najdis believe, but we also don't completely disregard islamic teachings and values in order to be progressive. I believe this set or rules is ideal for the Islam that was completed 14 centuries ago, before all the najdi fitnah took place and is firm enough to withstand western fitnahs. Here are 10 of them:

1. Music is permissible, as long as it contains no haram stuff (swearing, sex, drugs ect.)
   
2. Celebrating Mawlid / birthdays is permissible, as long as no harami activities (obvious, ill-intentioned free mixing, intimate sessions ect.)
   
3. Any form of doubt towards Allah / the Quran or the prophet / hadiths (the sahih atleast) is haram, or even worse kufr. It shows that one lacks fundamental Islamic values and beliefs, and in worst case is completely out of the religion.
   
4. Male - female friendship is discouraged. The risk of being exposed to haram stuff is there. Better safe than sorry. (although for academic purposes / school / work / job it is okay, but just to that extent)
   
5. Asking for Allahs help through the Prophet (pbuh) and other deviants is permissible (for example "Ya nabi, ya Ali, ya ghous al azam" ect.), aka. waseela
   
6. Not every religious invention is "bad" bid'ah, there are also "good" bid'ahs.
   
7. Most musical instruments are not haram, especially the flute,as it is used by sufis to channel the cries of the soul.
   
8. Hijab is strongly encouraged, as it is a requirement from Allah in the Quran and also has a lot of other benefits. Hijab does not reduce beauty. It is a sign of faith and obedience to the creator.
   
9. We respect Abu Bakr, Umar Farooq, Usman,Ali and the sahabas. Talking ill about any of them is strongly discouraged.
   
10. Public display of gay/same sex affection (or any, in that case) is discouraged. If you are married, keep the acts of affection inside your homes. If you are gay, have patience and don't act on your wishes/nafs. Indeed the rewards in the hereafter will be massive.
    

Ever since fifth grade, I (15f) got heavily bullied by multiple people at my school. It was the typical locking me in broom closets or bathrooms stalls, spreading rumors about me, breaking and stealing my stuff hurting me physically and mentally and stuff like that. I don’t even know what I did for them to treat me like that, I am no different to them, at all, so I really don’t understand how I got targeted to easily by people.
Most of that bullying was from my own „friend group“. It sounds stupid, I know. I had a best friend and she met some other friends, and slipped into a group and since I didn’t have any other friends and had a hard time making friends in general, I also ended up in that friend group. I dont even know how it happened, but it started simple. They purposely excluded me from their conversations, made fun of me for everything I did or said and „accidentally“ breaking or stealing some of my books, pens, lunches and stuff like that. I know how stupid I sound for not doing anything, but I was very emotionally attached to my best friend, since she was the only friend I had and I thought it was all just a phase and would eventually pass. It didn’t pass though and it got worse and worse. It went on for years and my attendance was suffering a lot due to the tormenting and bullying they did. I cried every morning before school, begging my parents to let me stay home, to a point where I threw up every morning and even passed out a few times. If my parents didn’t let me stay home, I sometimes just didn’t go and just walked the streets of my town aimlessly.
Yes, both my parents and the teachers knew about the bullying, but as expected, no one did anything to help me. I was around 13 at that time and everything was basically miserable. Life at home sucked and life at school was even worse. I picked up some bad habits, including $h and seriously thought about just ending it all, since I really didn’t know what to do anymore.
One day, a boy added me on snapchat and I recognized his name from my school. I was confused, because no one normally added me on snapchat, because no one really liked me. I was curious to see what he wanted and added him back. He send me a snap and we started talking, and I was surprised to find out, that we had a LOT of similar interests. I also told him about the bullying and how my „friends“ were treating me and he even comforted me. We became really good friends and he eventually asked me out and we started dating. It honestly helped me a lot and even though we didn’t talk much at school, I did go a lot more and it was easier too.
I got a lot more confident and randomly decided to leave my old friend group, not talking to them at all. I did go to our usual hangout stop during lunch and when they talked to me, I didn’t say anything and ignored them. Of course that didnt stop the from hurting me both mentally and physically, but at least by not reacting to it, I took some of their fun out of it. It seemed better and I also felt a bit better. But of course that wouldnt last long. One day, at the beginning of the school day, I was sitting at my desk, just looking down, waiting for class to start, when I saw my boyfriend and two of his friends walk up to me. I thought he just wanted to say hello or something like that, so I smiled at him. To my surprise, he went up to me and started screaming at me. I was confused and didn’t really know what to say, just looking back at him, which only seemed to piss him off more. One of the friends grabbed my arm and pulled me out of my chair, while the other grabbed my bag, emptying it on the floor. For context, I am a rather short girl, around 5‘3, while he is a bigger, tall boy, 6‘1, who plays football and goes to the gym regularly. Both he and his friends are a year older than me, so the physical advantage for them is obviously. I couldn’t really do anything, but listen to him scream and looking at his friends step on my stuff. He told me to „stop pretending to be a victim“ „grow up“ „not act like just a cry baby“ and other insults and slurs. His friend eventually let go off me and I just ran out of the room, hiding in a bathroom stall, crying. I was confused and didn’t understand what was going on. This went on for days and one day while I was sitting at lunch alone, he came up to me and just sat next to me. He didn’t say anything for a while, just looking down at the table. He then turned to me and told me how my old friend group came up to him and told him, that I spread rumors about them and was now ignoring them for now reason.
Why would he believe that? He knew everything and he also knows what kind of people my old „friends“ are. It sounds stupid, but I forgave him and now everything is back to „normal“. Yeah, I lot a lot of trust in him, and I am even a little scared, but I still like him a lot. I just don’t know how I always end up getting treated like Sht from everyone around me. Surely if everyone is treating me like that, there has to be something wrong with me, because this happened multiple times without any connection to each other. I just dont know what to do, everything is miserable and I just dont know how to deal with all this.

Help I feel like I am living in a parents nightmare! There are a lot of issues here so bare with me...
First of all, The most important part of this is my son has been in trouble recently for hitting his school counselor. Well, He told me a couple days ago that his dad and step mom both spank him and lock him in his room when he is in trouble and his dad threatened him by saying that next time my son hits someone he better hope the cops get to him before his dad does because he is going to whoop his ass. I have asked my son before if his dad hits him and he has always told me no. but a couple weeks ago I saw a large bruise on his butt. I did ask him and he told me he didn't remember what it was from. I realize that I should probably call DHS or CPS but I know my son will not tell on his father and my son is currently at his fathers house and I don't want to cause him to get hit more if that is what is happening. I can see that he is scared of him and desperately wants his approval. Do I wait until my son is back in my care or will it look bad that I didn't report right away?
Secondly I need advice on the best course of action for proving that my ex is alienating me and trying to gain control of everything to make himself look like the more responsible parent.. Since getting divorced in 2022 I have had several issues with my ex husband regarding our child. First off our divorce hearing went not so well for me.. He had not seen our child except some weekends here and there over the course of a year and a half before we went to court but was hell bent on not paying me any child support so when it came time to discuss custody he asked for 50/50 and joint decision making and he got it. He made it seem to the judge that I had been purposely keeping our child away from him over that time and she bought it despite him having no evidence. I had no idea he was going to lie on the stand so I was unprepared and neither of us had lawyers. He still had to pay me some child support since I was paying for daycare but shortly after our divorce was final he enrolled our son in a different daycare and put him on his wife's medical insurance without telling me. I only found out because he took me to mediation to have his child support reassessed and he now pays me no child support. At first I thought that was his goal was so I was agreeable now I believe his goal is to get full custody of our son and remove me from his life as much as possible.
Since getting 50/50 custody his wife has been the one caring for my son. She picks him up and drops him off everywhere he goes except for exchanges at my house. She fills out any paperwork needed for my son including medical paperwork. They also repeatedly decide where he is going to go to after-school care, summer care, and sports without including me. I have reminded him repeatedly that even though he is paying he is still supposed to include me in these decisions and he always has an excuse why he thinks its ok that he doesn't. His wife signs consent on my sons paperwork as if she is his mother and leaves me off the paperwork completely. She doesn't even include me as a emergency contact. I also discovered that she has used my SS# on my sons dental paperwork under her name. The problem is because she is putting her info on the paperwork I cannot get copies of anything to prove it since it would be a hippa violation for anyone to give it to me. Can she really be giving consent for him as a step parent? especially for medical appointments. What can I do about it?
Over the last couple years my son has had behavior issues at school and is acting out aggressively towards teachers and the school counselor. My ex took this as an opportunity to enroll our son into a school in his district. (he was in mine initially). However was against our son going to therapy. I finally got him to agree to therapy after quite some time but demanded that our son go to one very specific place that does family therapy where my ex can be in the room with our son while he is there. He also demanded that our son go on Saturdays so that we can both take him separately since we alternate weekends. I got the referrals for therapists and chose a different one. My son loves her and he had major improvements in behavior until recently. She does not have weekends available but I welcomed my ex to come to therapy any time he wants and shared the therapists info and gave her his info as well. He is not happy and is still demanding I take our son to the place he wants and has been sending mean emails to the therapist questioning her ethics and telling our son that he is going to have her arrested. She is ready to quit because she is so uncomfortable.
Its worth noting that my ex also rarely allows me to have contact with my son while he is at his house. Does not allow me to pick my son up from his house for exchanges and will not share info about sports or activities that my son is enrolled in so that I cannot attend them.
They have both said things to my son to try to turn him against me. They have told him that he and I are not a family because I am not remarried or have a father figure for my son in my household. They have told him that I am mean to his stepmom and I don't want her around. They have even gone so far as to tell my son that his step mom is his actual mom and that he should not trust me. They also seem to be telling him that they are going to move away to the mountains at some point. Neither his dad or I are allowed to move out of our current county without going back to court first. I think this is why he wants full custody.
We only speak through talking parents so most of this is documented on there. I am unsure if resources like CASA or TESSA would be helpful to me? My ex was aggressive towards me while we were together but never hit me so I never reported him. I do not have tons of money to spend on a lawyer but I will take out a loan if I have to. I did hire a lawyer previously and they were not much help and I ended up firing them before any action was taken. They told me that it was unlikely that custody would be changed and that it is very hard to prove parental alienation or emotional abuse of a child. Someone has also suggested that I get an attorney ad litem.. Surely the things that he and his wife are doing are not allowed but is a judge really just going to give him a slap on the wrist and let things keep going the way they are? I really feel at this point that my son needs to be in my custody or at the very least I should have full decision making to stop his father from alienating me. What would be the best thing for me to do?

I'm a m21 student, just about a year away from finishing college. I've always lived in Philly and commuted to school these past three years. I have never really been immersed in college life for many reasons that I won't get too in-depth in. I changed my major to Psychology this year, and I'm not sure where I will take this degree, though what is really important to me is understanding myself and others for actions that sometimes don't elicit the answer someone is looking for. To shorten a story that could fill countless pages, my gf of almost 4 years broke up with me over a year ago and, before that (while we were still dating), my dad relapsed and disappeared from my life. I've been sifting through ideas relentlessly trying to figure out where my purpose lies and how it can be best expressed without her. In this process, I feel so stagnant. I know my worth, but I genuinely feel that she was as good as it gets. She told me that I was always going to be the one that got away, but she was the one who left. She also said after the breakup that, even though we are soulmates, I deserve more than what she can offer. Though, this whole year without her, I've found myself watching almost 50 romantic comedies, and I feel more at peace imagining the two of us in those films more than I ever will going out to bars, embracing college life, and moving onto someone else. I feel like Tom Hanks when he lost his wife in Sleepless at Seattle. I know someone is out there that I could be just as compatible with; I've just been growing really impatient letting fate determine things when I feel they have already been determined. We spent every moment we could together and revolved our lives around each other. I even chose the same college as her (she was a year older) for the sole reason that we physically & mentally couldn't be away from each other. I guess a cliche description of our relationship would be that we were high-school sweethearts. A memory that will forever be ingrained in me is when we took a trip in the summer to Oregon, stayed in some coastal towns (Astoria & Seaside), climbed some of Mt. Rainier, and had an unforgettable time in Portland. I feel like, if I went back and visited those same places again this summer, it would be a big step towards giving those memories the most justice I can. She left me in a time where I needed her most so that sort of forced me to see her in a different light, but I have always been able to see through that and understand her for who she really strives to be, and what she knows I know her to be. We haven't talked in months and she's basically blocked me out of her life, telling me she's seeing other people. I just think that, if I were to go back to any of those places, she would find out somehow through social media and possibly have a deeper understanding of just how much being in those places with her really meant to me, even if it's just me there this time. This would also be an opportunity to see if I would want to move there long-term. I do want to get out of Philly as soon as I can, and I care enough about every moment we shared to the point that I would live my life across the country in a place where we once pictured ours. If anyone can help me at this crossroads I've found myself at, it would mean a lot. Thanks.

I just recently completed my Master’s in Social Work and I’m like 90% sure I’m going to pursue a PhD. I’ve been looking into sociology, social psychology, social work, and other similar humanities programs. I’d love to go Ivy, but I don’t think that’s very realistic.
All of my schools have been state/public schools with high acceptance rates, like 80%+, in the US. I wasn’t a top student by any means but I was and have always been a very strong student. I never received anything less than a 3.7 for all my degrees (I have 2 associates, a bachelors, and a masters). I worked full-time while going to school full-time, even in grad school when I also had to maintain a part-time internship.
As a part of my day to day job I was also involved in multiple studies for the medical campus/hospital of an R1 institution and am a coauthor on two of them. This was all during my last year of undergrad and my graduate degree.
I’d love to hear from people at Ivy’s and other R1 institutions what you think my chances would be. Also if you have any advice on the application process, rec letters, and/or tips for my resume/cv.
Edited to add more info: I’ve done limited research into PIs that I’d love to work with and the research they’re doing and have identified a few; 2 of them are at the same institution and operate their own labs, another is local to me, and the last is at an Ivy. I feel confident in who I am and that my personal statement is strong, as well as what I can contribute to the field and research. My worry was my grades and prior work for admission to these places.