Sample job interview follow up letter

Since i have studied CS in Afghanistan, we have no opportunities for internships there and obviously no jons especially for software engineering. I moved to germany, my german has become fluent and I have done an internship as a backend dev aswell. But unfortunately, I am legally not allowed to do internships more than a month. The internship went great and I pickup up on things very quick and I got a very good Praktikumszeugnis(recommendation letter). I started applying for junior dev jobs and I contacted one of the companies and they said they need people with at least six months of internship experience. So am I just screwed? Every graduate here would at least have 3 months of internship experience.
I'm supposed to find a job. I was thinking about getting a temporary job until I can find a software engineering role, but should I just give up and go for another career?

A few years ago I was fired from a provisional position. I had a toxic manager who wanted me out from day 1. This manager spread their toxicity to the wider mgmt team and different metrics were used against me compared to other new hires that progressed to other teams. On the day of my unexpected termination, I was told that my termination was due to not following call out procedures when sick two times over the course of a 6 month period. I suspect the real reason was they just wanted me out. My question is as follows.. Is there a top secret "do not re-hire " list shared among agencies? Later on I tried getting a job at another agency (DMV) with a lower salary grade. The interview went very well and they looked like they were desperate for new hires but I wasn't hired in the end. For further context I have a post graduate degree and over 10 years of working experience.

For context, my girlfriend (25F) and I (30M) have been dating for 3 years now. We are both from a lower middle class family and grew up in a religious country that english is not our first language. She graduated from the university 2 years ago with a degree in Psychology and I have a stable job working in Finance. She is compassionate, smart and soft spoken. I honestly see my future with her. She is the most beautiful human being l've ever seen and she is purely good. All of my friends love her and my family adores her. The only problem is she's been having a hard time trying to start pursuing her dreams. She talks big about finding a job, pursuing all her dreams, buying a home and raising a family but I don't see her taking the necessarily steps to achieve it. I'm trying my best to support her by encouraging her to apply for jobs at any company just to get a feel on what will the interview be like, she refused. I also tried to help her draft interview questions and answers, she refused to let me see her drafted answers. I offered to do a mock interview with her but she refused saying that I will just make her laugh and she'll get distracted. I also tried by showing her, I applied for a promotion and she was with me when I did the online interview, got the promotion but sadly that didn't help motivate or boost her confidence. I tried showing her agair that there is nothing to be afraid in a job interview so l decide to apply for a job in an another company, I got accepted and went through all the new hire process, but sadly it didn't help her. It gotten to the point that whenever I try to ask her about this issue or basically ask her what can I do to help, we just end up fighting and not speaking for days. I really don't know what to do. I am running out of options. I can't ask my friends or family for advice, I don't want them thinking less of her. I know that she is in a lot of pressure and she might be overthinking everything causing her to have anxiety over the interview or job seeking process. I just want to know if there is any other ways to help her overcome this.

I know there are already guides on this subreddit, but I wanted to create one for the Day 1 beginner, someone who doesn't have any knowledge and even lacks the motivation to make the gym a regular part of their lives.
Exercise:
Yes, diet is important, but I believe that muscle growth is more dependent on what you do in the gym than on what you do outside it.
However, my suggestion for the first few days is just to acclimatize yourself to the gym. Start with the treadmills or the cycles. Maybe try a weight machine just to see how it feels. Make yourself feel like you belong in the gym and then you can move onto the workouts.
A lot of people get frightened of the gym because of how much there is to learn and do there. So rather than explaining the use of each exercise, I thought I’d just give a couple of sample workouts. 3 days a week is a good place for an absolute new inductee to start since most new members may not yet have the dedication or commitment to go to the gym 4,5 or 6 times a week. The program is a full body template so even if you skip day 3, you will have hit most muscle groups at least once just by doing Day 1 and Day 2.
I have two versions here, Lower body dominant and upper body dominant. You can select based on preference but as a general recommendation, based on current day beauty standards, most men would prefer the upper body and most women the lower body versions of the program.
Each exercise is to be performed in sets and reps. Reps are how many times you need to be doing a particular exercise in a particular cycle. Sets are how many cycles of them you need to do. So, if you have 2x6 for squats, that means that you squat six times, then rest a couple of minutes, then squat six times again.
Rest time suggestions may vary but I’d suggest 2-3 minutes on average to start.
The programs are below:
~Lower Body dominant version~
Day 1 Goblet Squats 4x6 Dumbbell Shoulder press 4x8 Lat pulldown 3x10 Leg curl 3x10 Dumbbell Bicep curls 3x12
Day 2 Dumbbell Romanian deadlift 4x8 Dumbbell Bench press 4x6 Seated cable row 3x10 Leg press 3x10 Cable Triceps extension 3x12
Day 3 Assisted pullups 4x6 Dumbbell Lunges 3x12 Chest press machine 3x10 Leg curl 3x12 Dumbbell Lateral raises 3x12

~Upper Body dominant version~
Day 1
Goblet Squats 4x6
Dumbbell Shoulder press 4x8
Lat pulldown 3x10
Cable Triceps Pushdown 3x12
Dumbbell Bicep curls 3x12

Day 2
Dumbbell Romanian deadlift 4x8
Dumbbell Bench press 4x6
Seated cable row 3x10
Dumbbell Lateral Raises 3x10
Cable Triceps overhead extension 3x12

Day 3
Assisted pullups 4x6
Dumbbell Lunges 3x12
Chest press machine 3x10
Dumbbell Hammer curl 3x12
Dumbbell Lateral raises 3x12

I’d suggest following this routine for just the first 4-6 months and then moving onto a routine with more sets/reps/exercises.
Diet:
We all know how to improve our diets. Increase consumption of meat, eggs, fruits, vegetables, legumes, lentils, lower fat dairy, etc. and decrease consumption of fried/sugary/overly processed foods.

That’s how one should start. Yes, all of us want to lose fat and gain muscle. But unless you’re overweight, you don’t necessarily need to start with a cut/calorie deficit. You can take advantage of a phenomenon known as body recomposition. Since your body is detrained/undertrained, you can currently lose fat ~and~ gain muscle at the same time. This phenomenon is easiest to access when you’re an absolute beginner so I’d suggest just cleaning up your diet and focusing on your workout. You can try to get onto a bodybuilders diet and supplement routine once you’re a bit more experienced.

The final points are about patience and sticking to the basics. The journey takes time, years even, but that’s a good thing. You’ll look better today than yesterday and even better tomorrow. I’d suggest not being in a hurry to get there.
Stick to the basics. There are no magic pills, magic exercises, magic routines. The exercise routine I’ve mentioned above isn’t special, they're just one option of many. Weight loss and muscle gain are all about consistency and intensity. Be there every day and progress every day, whether it’s increasing weight, reps or improving your form. In no time, you won’t recognize the new version of you.

eh pano kasi na caught off guard ako sa pa ice breaker (games) at pagkain HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH kala ko tinawag lang ako para mag fill up ng form yun (kase maraming beses ng inulit to pupunta ka sa diff counters kumbaga) pala initial interview na HAHAHAHAHAH kaya yun ang ending mental block haysss...
this is my first ever job application, kinda feels annoying, awkward, and a bit of angesadness getting rejected.. AHAHAHAHAH
well atleast I tried.
(maganda nag interview sakin tho 👀).

• sincerely, new bpo applicant w/out experience 🤡.

The cost of housing has become one of the most pressing challenges faced by Australia nowadays. The ownership of one property seems less and less possible for an increasing number of Australians, given current Australia’s stamp duty policy. (to be updated depending on variables) This paper examines the impact of household income and stamp duty on conveyances on housing affordability with linear regression based on the data released by the Australian Bureau of Statistics (ABS). Note that the concept of ‘Housing Affordability’ focuses on the relationship between housing expenditure, including purchase price, mortgage repayment, stamp duty, etc., rather than the debate over ‘affordable house’, which pays attention to social housing and how low socioeconomic status group could afford a property in Australia.
Australian housing affordability has deteriorated significantly during the past five decades. According to price to income ratio index released by the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development, the housing price-to-income ratio has increased by around 78% since the 1980s despite the average income has increased by 5% over the period (Thomas, 2017). The statistics result indicated that the housing price skyrocketed much faster than average wages regardless of the CPI. we guess it may be a result of the continuous rise in stamp duty. Stamp duty is one of the most favorable housing policies by the Australian State Government as it counted for almost one-third of the Statement Government’s source revenue, and the stamp duty rate has grown six times higher in Australia compared to 10 years ago (Clifford & Freebairn, 2021).
In this study, we apply utility maximization in topic 1 of IDEC8064/2024 to analyze the impact of household income and stamp duty on housing affordability. Specifically, we apply the theory of how consumers maximize utility given their budget constraints within budget constraints imposed by income and cost, such as stamp duty, to analyze housing market behavior.
We developed the following model to estimate the relationship between stamp duty, household income, and housing affordability in Australia. For data, we choose the housing affordability ratio, household income, and stamp duty tax percentage change in tax revenue as variables, which indicate housing affordability, household income, and the level of stamp duties respectively. As a cost-to-income ratio, the affordable ratio indicates houses are more affordable when the ratio drops. Household income is based on the mean income per week in Australia. Lastly, the percentage change in stamp duties in tax revenue implies how much total tax revenue that the government received is from stamp duties, which can be viewed as an indicator to show the increase or decrease in stamp duties. To find out the impact of household income and stamp duties on the housing affordability ratio, we set up a regression model, which will tell us how the housing affordability ratio could change due to the change in household income and stamp duties. The result shows that, firstly, household income harms the housing affordability ratio, which means, the increase in household income will lead to a decrease in affordability if the stamp duty percentage is kept constant, in other words, the cost is reduced relative to the household income and the house is become more affordable. Also, the result implies that the stamp duty change percentage in tax revenue hurts the affordability ratio as well, and therefore, a unit rise in the percentage of stamp duty to tax revenue will result in a drop in the housing affordability ratio, that is, houses become more affordable as well even if the rise of stamp duty. This seems counterintuitive, so some robustness tests were carried out. We replace the stamp duty percentage change with the stamp duty revenue, as well as we run the regression with data across a longer period, but the same relationship that an increase in stamp duty can make houses more affordable. After some literature review, our explanation for that is the increase in stamp duty can restrain housing transfer activities, and with the drop in demand, houses become more affordable.
Our study reveals that the relationship between income, stamp duty (a type of tax paid when buying a home), and housing affordability in Australia is quite complex. Surprisingly, we discovered that as people's incomes rise and stamp duty increases, homes become more affordable. This may seem counterintuitive, but it suggests that the conventional understanding of the housing market may not capture all relevant factors. Our findings indicate that when formulating housing policies, it is important to take these unexpected results into account. In simple terms, although it is commonly assumed that higher incomes would make houses less affordable (as everyone could afford to pay more), our study demonstrates that this is not necessarily the case. Additionally, while taxes like stamp duty are typically viewed as factors that make buying a home more expensive, we found that they might contribute to keeping house prices more affordable. However, further research is needed to confirm these results and gain a better understanding of the underlying reasons.
The government should reconsider the structure of stamp duty based on our findings. Higher stamp duties might help control housing prices, so adjusting this tax could prevent prices from rising dramatically. Additionally, supporting policies that increase incomes could make housing more affordable. For example, the government could change stamp duty rates to increase more gradually, ensuring the tax doesn’t burden first-time homebuyers and makes housing more affordable for everyone. Moreover, ensuring that wages are increasing across different job sectors could help more people afford homes without causing housing prices to spike.
​

I am trying to automated adding new items in Paperless to a Notion database. I use paperless to manage the documents and want to keep using it for that. But I have been using notion to manage other aspects of my life e.g. I have databases with all the jobs I have had, so I can keep track of start dates and ends dates, roles, etc. I then link each job with a database of pensions I have.
So i thought if I have a database of correspondences I can link it to other databases e.g. I have a letter from my job confirming a promotion I save it in Paperless then in notion I can link it to that job or a statement from a pension provider I can link it to the relevant account.
Anyway I am trying to automate this. I'm not a good coder, but with ChatGPT's help I have a script that imports that data into Notion and copies the relevant fields. However, I have it set up to look every 10 minute for documents tagged with "inbox" (I'd prefer if Paperless could notify a webhook on new documents ingestion but sadly that's not available so I rely on the tags) so I want remove the inbox tag when the script successfully imports the document.
Here's how I am currently trying but it just doesn't work.

 # Remove the tag from the current tags list new_tags = [tag for tag in current_tags if tag != tag_id] print(new_tags) # Prepare the payload with the new tags updated_document_data = { "tags": new_tags } # Update the document with the new tags update_document_url = f"{base_url}/api/documents/{document_id}/" update_response = requests.patch(update_document_url, headers=headers, json=updated_document_data) if update_response.status_code == 200: print(f"Tag ID '{tag_id}' removed successfully from document {document_id}!") else: print(f"Failed to update document. Status code: {update_response.status_code}") print(update_response.json()) # Remove the tag from the current tags list new_tags = [tag for tag in current_tags if tag != tag_id] print(new_tags) # Prepare the payload with the new tags updated_document_data = { "tags": new_tags } # Update the document with the new tags update_document_url = f"{base_url}/api/documents/{document_id}/" update_response = requests.patch(update_document_url, headers=headers, json=updated_document_data) if update_response.status_code == 200: print(f"Tag ID '{tag_id}' removed successfully from document {document_id}!") else: print(f"Failed to update document. Status code: {update_response.status_code}") print(update_response.json()) 

My experience working at grilled:
-Got screamed at work by my assistant managers for accidently brushing my hand slightly on the egg pan. It caused me no small burns or whatsoever, but I got yelled at in my face in front of everyone. (and for the rest of my shift I (failed) trying to stop crying. He did not apologise for this. All I got was a talk after work and I felt like he was just trying to save face.
-During this talk he told me off for taking 15 minutes to find the imposs patties (when I was trying to calm myself down in the cool room because he yelled at me). He then later told me I had 48 hours to complete all my online training modules when I had school to do as well.
-being threatened with being fired if I had ever hurt myself again.
-I don’t feel comfortable working with others, I feel like I’m being watched. I realised anything I tell one team member something, my assistant managers would somehow know about it too (when they accidently slip it out). I feel like personal conversations is being passed down (from team members to higher ups)
-The reason I hurt myself in the first place (in one morning) is because I was careless, but I felt I was being rushed leading to me being careless. Every time my assistant manager would walk upstairs, he would say “has everything be done now?”. When I was only halfway and trying my best to finish.
-I am aware I’m bad at communicating, me being neurodivergent I have trouble processing information (aka taking orders) and realising when someone is calling to me. So I believe I was not a great fit for this fast-paced job. I opened this to my assistant manager, but he wanted to “fix the problem first”, but I don’t think there was a way to fix this.
-In the one week I was told i was "performing badly", I was given 4-night shifts in a row, whilst I had school in the morning, so I couldn’t keep up and was consequently exhausted. From this my assistant managers reported me to the head manager, although I knew I was underperforming a lot, I felt annoyed with this.
-I don’t simply get along with the assistant managers. One time I got nagged for cooking the beef when it was slightly falling apart (it was already falling apart when it was uncooked from the container), and was told, “how would you feel if you were given a broken burger, I would you feel if I broke you huh? Etc”. Like sir im not some Michelin star chef, I didn’t do this on purpose, im just some broke student being paid $16 an hour.
-I feel like there’s a lot of blaming, I felt like I was being blamed a lot for thing not entirely my fault, aka, not dropping some the meat down on Mondays but when there was already a lot of meat cooked but the people on dress was lagging. so I thought it would be better to cook meat later so they would be hotter later.
-My social anxiety is getting worse, I feel anxiety just entering the store to work.
-Overall, I’ve been told constantly that I am not performing up to standards. (I’ve been slow, etc). I’m trying my best, but I don’t know what else can do, I believe for both parties it would be best if I left my position. However, the grilled store are already understaffed, this is why I’m not being let go (yet).
-Btw I’ve been offered a position here even though they haven’t ever met/talked to me before. (I didn’t attend the interview because I read my boss’s message too late). (edited)

Hello, I just graduated last year and I’m almost not getting any interviews at all in this current job market in the U.S.
How can someone like me with a BS degree in Information Systems, a Software QA internship experience, a popular certification for Software Testing, and creates a nice cover letter explaining my love and passion for gaming and their specific products – still get a “moving forward with another candidate” email on their literal 15-21$ per hour qa role job posting.
Really losing hope for roles as a QA in general.

Working in the UAE would be a dream for many people, as it has several benefits. The salaries are tax-free, and the employees can get housing allowances, education allowances, and medical allowances. The country follows a zero-tax policy for employees.
One must get an employment visa in the UAE to work in the country. There are several criteria to follow to get a work visa. Firstly, it is obvious that you must hold a valid job offer letter from a big company to work in the UAE. Or else the employer must have registered the employee details in the Companies Representation Services UAE.
The people who are applying for work visas in the UAE must undergo medical tests. The medical test report that was taken recently must be submitted along with the visa application. The employee must take medical tests for infectious diseases, including hepatitis, HIV, and TB. The medical report must state that the employee is medically fit.
Security clearance is also a necessary step in getting an employment visa to work in the UAE. The company undergoes a background verification check for its employees. The background check is mandatory for all employees, especially those who have previously worked in the government sector or defense.
The educational qualification is a necessary document for work visa processing. If the employee is going to work in the healthcare or educational sectors in the pro service UAE, then this document is compulsory.
To work in the UAE, a good conduct certificate is a mandatory document. The conduct certificate must be issued by the government of the employee's origin. Without the good conduct certificate, the UAE will not process the employment visa for the employees.
What if you are unaware of the process?
Plus UAE will help you get the work visa by submitting the documents on your behalf. We will tell you about the required documents for visa processing. If you are about to start a business branch in the UAE and if you require any business advice regarding the risk factors in localities or whether your trade will make profits in certain places in the UAE, you can call us for consultation.

I'm not sure how helpful it will be to post here because I think my issue goes far beyond the usual conflicts one might find in a traditional dnd campaign. So before anyone reads this I wants to emphasise that 1. this was my very first dnd campaign and I joined it without any prior knowledge, and 2. this campaign was never intended to be a traditional "we're heroes and trying to save the world while fighting monsters left and right" campaign. I hope this answers any questions along the lines of "Well, why did you create this kind of character in the first place?" and "Why do your characters spend so much time talking about stuff, don't you have some beholders to fight?". I also cannot explain the whole situation without writing a literal 20 page long essay, so I'll try to keep it as short as possible and only give two examples. I'm definitely leaving a lot of details out here, so please let me know if clarifications or futher information is needed.
To preface what this is all about: I was a player in a very roleplay focused campaign and my character basically turned into the problem child of this campaign. I never intended for my character to be the focus, was never interested in him being the focus, but nothing I ever did suceeded in solving the issues at hand and taking the focus away from him. I constantly got accused of "making my character suffer", whereas from my perspective I was constantly trying to keep this character safe from the constant attacks he had to endure. It was like no matter what I did, no matter what I let this character do, it was never right. I think everyone in this group makes an effort to play their characters realistically, I defininitely do. And yet it was never me going "I know exactly what my character has to do to fix this but I'll REFUSE to do it because I don't like it" but me literally having no clue what people wanted from this character. The dm repeatedly said that nothing they tried to fix this character was helping. Whereas from my perspective these things that were supposed to "help" my character were the exact things that my character was struggling with. So it turned into a constant stream of something happening, my character then feeling bad, then everyone focusing on my character feeling bad, then my character trying to fix things, everyone telling him that he's doing it wrong, my character feeling even worse.... and me wondering why my character cannot just exist in peace, why we constantly have to focus on him instead of the "plot". I don't think anyone was interested in constantly discussing my character's mental state, I definitely wasn't interested in doing that, and yet we kept doing it. But I also did not know how to have him react differently to the constant shit getting thrown at him.
______
So, basically:
Around three years ago a friend of mine told me about this new dnd campaign they were starting and asked me to join. I've known this friend for half my life but we never lived close to each other, maintaining loose contact over Twitter and me visisting them every two or three years. I had never played dnd before, which they didn't think would be a problem, calling the campaign "very beginner friendly". The whole point behind this campaign was that both this friend (the dm) and two of the players from the main campaign they were playing wanted to play more regularly, so my friend/dm came up with this campaign which was basically a prequel to that main campaign. That main campaign was a more "traditional" dnd campaign with a quest to save the world and regular combat. Meanwhile this new campaign was supposed to be focused on roleplay. There was no overarching plot or quest and the setting was an arcane school and our characters were supposed to be students at said school, just starting their first semester.
When creating our characters the dm asked us to include at least one character in the backstory that was important for our character, and also an objective for our character, something they wanted to achieve. The character I came up with was a young half-elf wizard specialising in abjuration. The gist of his story was that his parents had been arrested and executed for high treason when he was very young and that he grew up rather isolated with his older brother in a place they were not allowed to leave before coming off age. When my character was 14 he woke up one morning to find his brother gone. He had left him only a cryptic letter, hinting at wanting to find out what had really happened to their parents, telling my character that he was sorry and that he would come back. When his brother had not come back after several months, my character too ran away and made his way to Candlekeep, which he had visited many times with his parents (who had been scholars) as a child. He tried to find answers in Candlekeep and spent the following three years hiding in the library before something prompted him to leave and travel to the aforementioned arcane school in order to study there. His objective was to find out why his parents had to die, what happened to his brother, and adjusting to normal life after years of isolation.
Personality wise this character was supposed to be very kind, very gentle, quite naive, honest, and at the beginning of the campaign rather anxious. My assumption was that after growing up in isolation he would need some time to get acclimatised and would be anxious and overwhelmed in the beginning but would loosen up with time and become more self-confident. Some bad stuff happened early on in the campaign and he reacted to it in a rather not healthy way (withdrawing, refusing to eat, but also not talking about what was going on because he didn't want to put the focus on himself). I messed up here, I realised that later. I assumed the other characters would sit him down and ask him what was going on, leading to some kind of cathartic conversation, my character then revealing his past, and him becoming more confident and positive through it, completely resolving this issue. I didn't realise that introducing these kind of psychological issues into the story would be an issue, simply because I wasn't planning on making it a big thing. I thought it would be realistic for him to react this way and I thought it was something that could easily be resolved. Nowadays I would approach this completely differently: if I were to play this character now I would make this whole "accepting his past, becoming more self-confident and open" thing part of his backstory and would start him off as being confident and in tune with his emotions, instead of trying to quickly get through this development at the start of the campaign. So I think I know what I SHOULD have done to prevent this from escalating. What I am trying to figure out is what I could have done to fix it AFTER realising my mistake. Because we spent months and months trying to resolve this issue and never really got anywhere. Despite me trying my best to keep the focus away from my character, despite me trying to turn him into someone more confident and happy, despite me NOT WANTING him to be the focus of the story and doing my best to keep him out of the spotlight.
______
Here is an example of the things going on in the story, to which my character reacted badly and me not knowing how else I could have had him react that would not have caused further conflict:
Over the course of the campaign L. figured out what his brother was up to after him and his friends getting intro trouble and a mysterious stranger helping them get out of there and that stranger then revealing himself to be A.'s husband (and therefore my character's brother-in-law). L. had a lenghty discussion with this person and after that I basically viewed L.'s conflict as resolved: he now knew why his brother had left, he knew that it had not been his fault, and he knew that his brother had found someone who loved him and was not alone. L. still hoped to be able to see his brother again to get to say goodbye properly. Because in L.'s mind there was no other possibility but this being a goodbye: his brother had a new life now that he, L., was not part of anymore. And L. accepted that. There was no anger, no resentment, only relief knowing that his brother was not alone, had someone by his side who loved him, and that he still cared about L. and that L. had not - as he had feared - done anything that had caused his brother to not want to be near him anymore. He had finally gotten the closure he had needed, he was feeling okay and I viewed this whole conflict as resolved.
Fast forward a few weeks: A. finally suceeded in doing what he had been working on these past few years and returned to L., just like he had promised in the letter he had left him all that time ago. When talking to him, L. realised that A. was not actually planning on leaving, like L. had assumed. Instead A. told him that he and his husband would stay and look for a new home near L.'s school. L. was very surprised by this but of course he was also happy. He hadn't even considered that his brother would stay. His biggest hope had been that his brother would occasionally send him a letter from whereever he was. Him actually wanting to stay was very unexpected for L. but of course he was very happy about it. They also had some good conversations during that time, which not only brought L. further closure but also revealed connections between several past plot points.
About a week after A.'s return L. went to visit him. He just wanted to spend some time with his brother and also ask him for advice. The semester was coming to an end and everyone was busy preparing for the final exams and L. also still needed to find an internship placement for the summer break. L. wanted to do his internship in Candlekeep but was unsure on how to approach this, who to contact, how to phrase his request, so he thought asking his eloquent and knowledgable brother for advice would be a good idea. This conversation quickly went downhill with A. accusing L. of not respecting the people working at Candlekeep enough to do proper research beforehand and L. ending up feeling like he didn't deserve doing an internship there and ending up feeling even more stressed out about the whole thing than he had already been beforehand. They changed the topic and at some point A. started to jokingly fighting L. and putting him in a headlock. L. had no interest in fighting his brother, even as a joke, and reacted by going limp so he could slip away. A. then asked something along the lines of "So that's how you react in a fight? You just give up?" and L. said "Well, I know you would never intentionally hurt me with no good reason". The next second L. was falling. He was up in the sky, the ground many meters below him, and he was falling. L. immediately deduced that this must be some kind of enchantment and tried to fight it, but neither acknowledging that this wasn't real nor trying to shake it off did anything. He did not know any flying or hovering spells, nothing that would help him stop the fall, and ended up crashing into the ground. The next moment he was in some kind of water pool inside a cave that he struggled to get out of. A. was waiting by the cave entrance and offered L. his hand when he got out. L. refused to take it. A. then left and L. eventually followed, finding himself back in the room they had been in before. Either in the cave or shortly afterwards A. asked L. why he hadn't just used a spell to stop his fall, being surprised by L.'s statement that he had not yet learned an appropriate spell. L. eventually sat down at the table and did some exam preparation. A. made some food and put some in front of L. which L. ignored. Eventually L. looked up and asked A. what his biggest fear was. A. had just put L. through several of his biggest fears - falling, drowning, not being able to trust the ones he loves, and getting his control taken away - so he wanted to know what A. was scared of most. A. the told L. that his biggest fear was someone using his abilities to do something bad. And then he explained to L. that he had come to the conclusion that he would not be able to stay after all. That while he was able to defend himself, L. was not, and anyone wanting to get to A. would have an easy time doing so through L. who was evidently not able to defend himself. L. did not take that well and asked A. why he couldn't just train L. so he would get better at defending himself but A. refused. A. then said he would take a walk and allowed L. to come with him. They walked for several hours without talking, ending up in the middle of a forest where some ancient creature appeared that A. had helped several years ago and that was now nearing the end of its life and had called A. there to say goodbye. A. also explained to L. that he did not actually want to stay. That he - A. - had been naive in thinking that he could just live a normal life and that it had been nothing but a dream and that he simply wasn't made for that kind of life. Some time during that conversation A. also told L. that he was convinced that he would end up in the Nine Hells for the things he had done. They spent the night in the woods and the next morning L. realised that all his things had been stolen by some fey creatures, including his spell book. After searching for several hours they were able to find his spellbook, which had been smeared with insults. A. managed to clean it up and they returned back home and L. was reuinted with the rest of the group. Before L. left A. also gifted him an indestructable spellbook. A few days after these events L. went to the temple and addressed Mystra, telling her how lost he was feeling and how worried he was about his brother. He told her that he wanted nothing more than to protect the ones around him but how he was constantly failing in doing so. And how he just wanted his brother to be safe and how he was worried he would really eventually end up in the Nine Hells and how he didn't think A. deserved that but that he didn't know how to prevent that from happening. The next morning L. found some strange piece of cloth on his face which after some examination was revealed to be an item belonging to Mystra which she had used to hide something in the past. The very condensed explanation of what that item does is that when attuned to it one cannot be found through any kind of traditional divination magic, making one basically undetectable. The next time L. saw A. he told him about this item and A. was basically like "Oh cool, well in that case we can actually stay here". L.'s reaction was to start crying and A. asked him why he was so upset and why everything was always the end of the world to him.
The way I see this whole situation: I simply wanted L. to spend some time with his brother, hopefully get some advice from him regarding that internship and then going back to the rest of the group. Instead what happened was that A. first called him disrespectful for wanting to do an internship at a place and not having done enough research beforehand. Then taking L.'s statement "you wouldn't hurt me with no good reason" to assault L. Then telling L. that he would not stay after all due to L. apparently not being able to defend himself. Then explaining to him that "actually, I didn't want to stay in the first place", and then a few days later telling him he WILL stay after all. So basically, L. had accepted that his brother would not come back to him for good, he had accepted this and had found closure. Then his brother told him he WOULD stay and L. was of course happy about this surprising turn of events. Then his brother told him that due to L. not being able to defend himself he CANNOT stay. Then he tells him he doesn't WANT to stay anyway, confirming the exact reasoning behind L.'s initial assumption that A. would not stay. And then after realising the threat was eliminated, decided to stay afterall, despite having it made very clear that he did not actually WANT to stay... and apparently only staying because he thought that's what L. wants, despite L. repeatedly explaining that his priority is for A. to be happy and that he does not want A. to stay if that's not what makes him happy and A. just completely ignoring that? Am I really the only person who thinks that it's understandable why L. is confused and upset in this situation? Plus the constant "What do you mean, you don't know [this one simple thing]?" when L. is already barely able to get a regular long rest in between trying to keep up with school work and all the stuff that's going on at the side, like a literal war for example, and constantly feeling that no matter what he decides it's always wrong and he never has enough time to do the things he is supposed to do, let alone the things he wants to do? Plus him wanting to spend the afternoon with his brother turning into a 36 hour long event and him having to spend half a day looking for his spellbook, only to find it smeared with insults?
Am I being dense for not understanding what the whole point of this was? Trying to make it clear to L. that his brother is a powerful and dangerous person? He was already very aware of that and did not need a reminder. Proving to L. that he shouldn't trust his brother? Why even associate with him in the first place if you don't want him to trust you? Giving him the indestructable spellbook was nice. But was having some fey creatures steal his original one and smear insults all over it and him having to spend hours searching for it really necessary?
Whatever the hell it is the dm was trying to do here, I think a simple, calm conversation between those two would have been a lot more effective.
But maybe it's clearer from the outside, so if someone else understands what happened here, please help me understand.
______
Another situation was that due to his struggles early on in the campaign my character was supposed to see the school's healer once a week so she could make sure that he was okay. My character went there once a week, feeling more or less okay when entering her office, and coming out feeling confused and upset after having his mental state analysed and picked apart. Neither did my character enjoy this nor did I think that any of the players (including myself) had any interest in listening to my character discuss his emotions every week. So eventually I had my character write a letter to the headmistress, explaning that he wanted to stop doing these weekly check-ins. Upon being asked why, he explained that these appointments actively made him feel bad and that he would do a lot better if he didn't constantly feel pressured into talking about things he didn't want to talk about. The reaction was that he was told that if he cannot handle simply being asked how he was doing once a week, then he wasn't stable enough to go to school, and consequently got kicked out. Leading to us spending two sessions trying to resolve this and my character eventually being allowed back into the school. ______
The situations I described are the kind of thing that constantly happened to my character.
We had a calendar where we wrote down short descriptions of what happened each day. I once went through this calendar with a friend (who does not play dnd) and it basically went like this: "So that day this traumatic thing happened to L., and the next day this happened, and two days later this happened, then the next day he almost died, then three days later he discovered this, the next day this other thing happened,....", and my friend just went "Holy shit, it's no surprise that this kid is losing his marmbles."
So I keep alternating between "I messed up this whole campaign by creating a problematic character" and the feeling that the dm had it out for specifically my character and it didn't matter what I did, nothing could have solved this.
Some constructive ideas on what I did wrong and what I could have done to fix things would be appreciated. (And yes, we did talk about this in the group. I eventually got tired of talking about it because it never lead anywhere.

Hey all,
My boss is garbage. Poor manager, doesnt respect work-life boundaries, narcissistic, and lets anyone do what they want to his teams even if the workload is insane.
Anyway, we've been dealing with his garbage for a couple years, and he's 1 step down from C-suite. A couple weeks ago, internal auditors interviewed 2 of his direct reports to gauge his leadership effectiveness, integrity, etc. They were scheduled for 30 mins. One went 45 mins, the other went an hour. Both basically vented on his horrific leadership. My turn came, I went on for an hour and 15. Next two people went 90 mins. We all said nothing can fix him and that if he's not removed, then his whole leadership under him are ready to leave.
Lately weve all been fairly confident that something will happen to him. Our calendars are all widely visible (we use google), and his boss met with audit for an hour, then the next day his boss had a meeting with employee general counsel that was scheduled during the audit meeting.
Now we wait, but its getting tough to wait because we're all eager to see him axed/terminated soon and patience is wearing thin. We're also all become a lot more flippant with him and resistant to the ridiculous things he says. Im prepared to lose my job over this as I have a lot saved up and a decent side hussle.
Any tips on this situation? Should we try to get HR complaints going too if he's still here by June? Should we just go to his manager as one unified team to make sure she knows everything we told audit?
This manager has 0 consideration for work life balance, will bomb us with work, will hold us 30-90 mins over in a meeting because he rambles so much, he interrupts incessantly and monopolizes the conversation, and will change major assignments on us with 1 day notice to get everything changed. He's also mocked school shootings before and asked people to respond to issues while they were out sick or on approved PTO.

I dont know what to do at this moment
Imma try to keep this short as possible I met a girl on snap '18F’ and I’m '20M’ , 2 months ago She lives about 40 mins from me We had planned to meet just next month and we had spoken about this not to long ago (meet-up) I asked her to be my gf about a month ago(WhatsApp) She said yes , (sorry if some stuff in here is irrelevant) Anyways i know she has had alot of traumatical experiences and has tried to off herself 2 or three times this year before meeting me She said I helped her Few weeks ago she said something about she could disappear for a while , cause she needed a break for her mental health But we still talked a lot even after all that Just yesterday i felt something was wrong as she never replies with one word answers But I told her when she is ready to talk I’ll be here Then she told me her parents (apparently ill treat her) have went through her stuff again , she tried to off herself again and now she is being sent to a mental institution again but she estimates her stay being for 9 months( after 3 months she will be moved to a private institution for 3 or 6 months in another province , that’s what she said but she could of made a mistake) I told her that I’m not gonna move on and I’m gonna wait for her She said she will do the same And “this is all part of gods plan” Honestly she is the best girl I’ve ever met and I don’t wanna lose her Also apparently she was supposed to move to the uk with her mom next week ( she informed me a month ago)but just yesterday she told me that her mom will go without her and then bring her to the uk after 2 or 4 months I was fine with the idea of long distance relationship cause she said she will come back holidays (December) and her aunt lives a road away from me , but her dad won’t let her see her aunt , that was our first way of meeting up that didn’t work I can’t sleep or think about other stuff other than her , I can’t breathe much , a lot of anxiety I’m planning to go visit her In there within 3 months(this would be my first time meeting her) , hopefully they let me in or atleast send her letters or gifts , I don’t have a job or anything,I’m currently studying (3rd year) but I saved up money to meet her since 2 months ago I don’t have necessarily a question but just ANY ADVICE please 🙏🏼 BE HONEST ,you don’t have to sugarcoat
TLDR:Met a girl 2 months ago,she became my gf,we were supposed to meet but that was until she was sent into a mental institution today…

l have been diagnosed with hyperacusis. I am currently exploring treatment options and came across the Drs pioneering work in the round and oval window reinforcement procedure. His contributions to this field are truly commendable, and I was hopeful that this could be a viable solution for me.
In addition to being a patient, I hold an epidemiology post graduate degree, which compels me to thoroughly understand both the short- and long-term implications of any medical treatment. I have some specific concerns and would greatly appreciate the community's thoughts on them.
I read of promising short term results, with significant improvements in noise tolerance. However, the sample sizes were relatively small, and follow-up periods were limited. Without additional insights or data on the long-term efficacy and safety of the procedure I am wary.
There were reports of hearing loss. Individuals with hearing loss often become more sensitive to loud sounds. This often takes a long time but the studies only follow patients for a short time.

long post alert. sorry for the brain dump - I just need help saving my family.
I sincerely feel our problems started on reddit, so I feel it's only right to come back here to see if you can help me solve the mess we made. So a few years ago, my wife came to reddit for advice navigating a cultural clash - you can read her OG post here. In retrospect, the responses she got were awful, rude and many racist.
My wife is from Zimbabwe, I am Swiss and we met while at university in my country. I fell for her instantly. Truthfully, I'd never seen anyone so beautiful. She was kind, so incredibly intelligent and has this gravitational pull to her. We started off as friends, but we eventually began dating and got into a steady relationship. I wanted to marry straight away, but she had career ambitions she wanted to meet before she married. At the time of the reddit post - I was going through some stuff. In truth, I knew the expectation of roora was on anyone who would marry her, and I had been saving for that alongside her engagement ring for years. I had gotten into a fight with my brother before she asked me about setting a date for her roora - where he'd said some nasty things about me being with a black woman and how I was losing myself and my cultural identity due to the concessions I'd made to be with my wife. It's why I reacted the way I did when she asked me about it, something I deeply regret to this day.
After the shit show that was that post, we spent 3 months in couples' counselling. She repeatedly told me that she didn't want to force me to do anything I didn't want to do. She said that she deserved to be with someone who enthusiastically embraced all parts of her - and if any part of me took issue with her culture, she asked that I bow out before I tied us together for life. I confessed that I knew all along about the roora, and I had prepared for it, but the conversations with my brother are what led me to say what I did. She was mad - I'd allowed her to be mocked, ridiculed and bullied by strangers online because I couldn't communicate with her, but we worked through.
We had a beautiful traditional wedding in her country, then another one with my traditions in mine. Her family was kind and welcoming, making many concessions for me as they had done since I met them. We planned on starting a family soon after we married, but she'd always said she want to have her babies back in her country so she can have her family around her. We had agreed that this is what we'd do. It's important to note that my wife doesn't really like living here - she says she hates living here. We lived in Sweden for much of our relationship, and many will know the people are on the cold side. She hated the food, the weather, struggled with the cold people - her country's people are very warm and friendly - and for the last 2 years she had to go on antidepressants because it was all a bit much for her. She asked me when we were going to move, and I asked for us to hang on for a while so I can finish a project I'm leading at work. We'd fought about this in the past, but this time she just nodded at me so I thought she finally got it. That was over 18 months ago and we didn't end up moving as I got promoted and it became harder to walk away. Her grandma passed away so I attributed the low mood to that.
Our problems came when she asked me if I was having an affair with my colleague. This was when I got home late one evening and found her sitting in the dark. I'd forgotten she was making dinner for us to be honest because I had a lot going on at work and it just slipped my mind. I told her that colleague and I were working late and I forgot - sorry. She grew confrontational and told me I was spending a lot of time with colleague lately, and she's noticed her name on my phone more than a few times. She asked me if there was anything she ought to know. This is when I may have killed my marriage - I told her I didn't give her father a truck full of cattle for her to question me. This was my house, my wife and if I wanted to have something on the side that was nobody's business but mine. She looked like I'd slapped her and I could see her holding back tears. I don't know why I didn't drop to my knees and beg forgiveness, instead doubled down and told her to stop the theatrics. Here's the thing - I'm not having an affair of any kind with my colleague - we really were just heavily into this project we're both super excited about. I don't know why I couldn't just say that to my wife.
She didn't come to bed that night, and I left early in the morning the day after and came home when she was asleep. This continued for days where I avoided her because I couldn't face the guilt. On the Friday, came home to a gift box that contained a positive pregnancy test and I long letter from my wife. I won't share all of it - but she said she was going to tell me on the night I bailed on dinner, that I had hurt her beyond measure with what I said to her and that she was "no longer going to show her love for me through self sacrifice". She told me she doesn't consent to be in a polygamous relationship, and since it's what I want I should expect to receive divorce papers from her soon. She left her rings and house keys too.
I had a panic attacked. I was able to call for help before the worst of it came, but I spiralled. I had monumentally fucked up, and lost my wife and unborn child because of it. I tried to call her, but her phone was going straight voicemail. I called her brother, who was short with me but assured me she was fine. He wouldn't tell me more. I finally tracked her down after 2 weeks - she'd gone back to her parents in Zimbabwe.
I can't follow her just yet because the project I've worked on for so long now is near completion and I can't walk away. My friends told me I was racist to my wife in my actions, because I never would have tried that with a white man and tried to use her culture against her. The fact that I wasn't even serious make me more cruel apparently. She still won't speak to me - I have tried all avenues and she won't hear me out. I love her beyond measure and I don't know how to get her back. Please, help me.

I (45f) have been exclusively dating a guy (48M) for around three months now. We’re both newly divorced. He cheated on his wife of 14 years (they have 3 kids together -just like me) in 2019. He and a 30yo woman at his workplace had been flirting for months, then on a week long work trip they hooked up multiple times. Once the trip was over, she wanted him to leave his wife and kids for her, he said, no it’s over. Said he was racked with guilt. Told his wife within a week of returning home. Went for counseling. Said his marriage was sexless prior to the affair. When I dug more, he said, well they had sex once a quarter for two years and it wasn’t enough and she didn’t care when he’d tell her. They had a good year after therapy, but then fell back into habits of fighting and being miserable. Eventually divorced. Anyway, I like him a lot. He really likes me. I just can’t get over the fact that he cheated on her. It wasn’t a one night stand. He let it happen for the whole week of his trip and then ended it. When I asked, he said he was over her in a couple of months. They live in different states now. What really annoys me is that after his separation (a year before meeting me), he started following her on instagram. She’s getting married. He says he’s happy for her. She’s public, so I can see that he likes her posts. He is very extroverted and social and says he just likes her as nothing more than a social media friend. That they don’t even message or talk. That if she reached out and asked to reconnect, he’d have no interest even if he wasn’t with me. He just likes her work (she works for nfl and has a cool job). Idk, it just makes me think once a cheater, always a cheater. I don’t think he’d go back to her, but maybe repeat something similar with someone else. Thoughts?

almost 18yo male (severe vata) require advice related to females and how to be more consistent
I spent 2 years studying for a collage entrance exam and got distracted and depressed half the time and wasn’t able to complete it 1st major failure in my life . I now have to study another year and redo it(about 60 percent of the people who succeed have to give it another year[consoling myself ig] )
There was a girl in who I knew since I was around 5-12yo (used to sit next to her in the school bus almost everyday) then she moved to usa in 6th grade
when i was in 8th grade I realized that I actually kind of liked the girl the whole time just didn’t know it then As there was no way of contacting her I tried to forget about her
The days when I completely did she would randomly come in my dreams and remind me of her existence (dreams weren't romantic in nature just had her in them)
in 11th i finally mustered up the courage to contact her just for the sake of contacting her
we texted for a bit and then i got busy
Ghosted her for almost a month because of how busy I got
then when i asked her about holi after a month of ghosting she randomly tells me that she liked me in 4rth and figured out that she did so in 9th
Mentally I was like what the fuck you could have told me before and I was also kind of glad that the feeling was mutual
I was also kind of sad because of the geographical restraints , hope and motivated to work harder to reach USA
i wrote her a long letter in a word document and sent it against my better judgement her response was favorable and she send the me a text
which ended with "can I claim you as mine"
later she said this
Hey {my name}- I realized that I sent you a message indicating my feelings for you but after thinking more about it today I came to the conclusion that I just can't be in any form of a relationship rn, casual or not. I'm so sorry if I led you on but I respect you as a person and care about u a lot which is why I wanted to be honest, but I would love for us continue to be friends because reconnecting with you has been so fun and I enjoy our convos (as long as you don't leave me on seen for 12 hours haha). Anyway I appreciate you understanding, I just don't have the capacity for anything more than friendship rn
after more texting
we can reconsider this after May cuz I’ll be busy till then
Sorry i didn’t respond today i just realized that I started talking a lot about you And idk why
i don’t understand female nature but what i one can assume from these snippets is that
either she really likes me and actually does not have the time to persue anything(neither do i honestly) fell for someone else closer to her trying to let me down gently and not completely obliterate my heart
i know that there is no possibility as of now to be with her .And I really need to work hard for a couple of years to create it and to set up a good life for myself
but I just want to know that that the feelings are not volatile and went away permanently in a jiffy on her end. I am too scared to ask (I tried to and got this as a response )
Hey I just wanted to say that I really I really like talking to you but I think that we need to address the fact that we live in completely different places and are in different stages of our lives. I only see you platonically but I really enjoy our friendship and conversations and don’t want to leave that. I really don’t have the capacity to be in a long term relationship right now, and I don’t know what will happen in the future. I’m really only thinking about right now, and I don’t want let you down, but that conversation is not in my head. I don’t want to keep leading you on, but I do enjoy our friendship and value it.
i just needed a place to vent and get help from someone who knows females better than I do the girl just keeps randomly infiltrating my dreams I kind of like the dreams but yeah they distract me a lot
ik meditation is supposed to help with emotional detachment I have tried to do it and improve myself so that I can be worthy of her I am trying my best to become a better human in all walks of life,its just that my vata gets the better of me and de-rails me a lot I am pretty sure I suffer with you tube addiction and try to hide away from the fact that I do so .I am trying to improve but I am scared of failure what if I fail in my entrance exams don’t reach USA stay distracted the rest of my life and then die after accomplishing nothing
Idk how this can be helped I just wanted to know that she may still have even a tiny amount of feelings form me (it would make me less distracted maybe)
the best possible outcome that I can possibly imagine is that she again randomly tells me that she does still like we call each other and talk once every week
i am able to study/work towards my goals for 8hrs a day Build muscle for 1hr a day Walk for 1 hr a day Listen to music only at the end of he day everyday for the next 10 years consistently
making me competent and giving me a good carrier(in electronics computer science or 3d(i like 3d the most rendering part of it making the tools that allow this to be done virtual worlds to be created i think i could learn about it and work for it just through my inherent inclination))
as of now i am only able to follow my timetable by 50 percent
i realize that this piece of text is completely incoherent and jumbled thanks for listening to me and if you have any advice that could help me achieve the my goals do tell