Restoring scoreboard's after changing a nickname

Note: This will work on versions as of 1.20.2 and below, and requires the use of a datapack as it uses macros#Macros).
When a player changes his nickname, this will be considered a new player for the scoreboards. Therefore, you may want this player to return all his scores, and, if you want, anything else automatically after changing his nickname.
This article provides an example for restoring scoreboard ID, coins and play_time scores.
If the inventory was not transferred automatically for any reason, then you can also return the player's inventory (if you stored the inventory before).
This method uses storage to store some data about the player, namely:

• Scoreboard ID - used for the scoreboard ID of the system^\1]);
• Player UUID - when changing a nickname, the player's UUID does not change, so this is the main way to find player data;
• Nickname - used in a macro to copy scores from the old to the new player nickname;

[1] - Storing the scoreboard ID is optional and is presented in the article as an example.
As a result, storage example:database with a players list will be created with this data for each player with like the following content:

# storage example:database {players:[{ID:1,UUID:[I;-1166469461,-1413460234,-1975305955,-1073877043],Name:"GalSergey"}]} 

When a player joining to the server for the first time (including the first time after changing his nickname), the player does not have any values in the scoreboard, which can be easily detected with the following command:

execute as @a unless score @s  = @s  run say I don't have . 

So you can run a function that will check if there is a player with this UUID in storage example:database. But before we do this, let's first create a function (example:uuid/new) in which we will add the new player's data to this storage.

Adding a new player to storage

So we will first write all the data to be stored in this compound tag, so that later it will be easier to add all this data to the storage example:database players list.
If you are using a scoreboard ID system, in this function we will immediately give the new player a scoreboard ID and also set this value in storage example:macro this.ID:

# function example:uuid/new execute store result score @s ID store result storage example:macro this.ID int 1 run scoreboard players add #new ID 1 

The player UUID can simply be copied from the player data:

data modify storage example:macro this.UUID set from entity @s UUID 

But getting a player's nickname as a simple string (not a JSON object) is not so easy. The easiest way is to create a player head using this loot table and read the "minecraft:profile".name component (1.20.5 and above) or the SkullOwner.Name tag (1.20.2 - 1.20.4).
To do this in an optimal way, you can create an item_display with a previously known UUID in the load function, but make sure that this position is always loaded. This will avoid using a target selector.

# function example:load execute unless entity 3ecf96f6-5342-4ab1-a629-10926cea8230 run summon item_display ~ ~ ~ {UUID:[I;1053791990,1396853425,-1507258222,1827308080]} 

Now you can use /loot to create a player head and write the item.components."minecraft:profile".name tag to storage:

# function example:uuid/get_nickname loot replace entity 3ecf96f6-5342-4ab1-a629-10926cea8230 container.0 loot example:player_head data modify storage example:macro this.Name set from entity 3ecf96f6-5342-4ab1-a629-10926cea8230 item.components."minecraft:profile".name 

Now let's return to the previous function (example:uuid/new) and add the received ID, UUID and Name of the player to storage example:database players:

# function example:uuid/new data modify storage example:database players append from storage example:macro this 

Checking player UUID

Now that we have a function for adding data of new players to storage, let's create a function to check whether the “new” player is really new, or whether this player has changed his nickname.
First, let's delete any data that may be in storage example:macro this and run the macro function (example:uuid/find) in which we will look for the UUID of the selected player:

# function example:uuid/check data remove storage example:macro this function example:uuid/find with entity @s 

In this function, we will insert the player's UUID into the /data modify command to get the player's data object stored in storage:

# function example:uuid/find $data modify storage example:macro this from storage example:database players[{UUID:$(UUID)}] 

So, for example, if the player has UUID:[I;1053791990,1396853425,-1507258222,1827308080] then this command will be executed:

data modify storage example:macro this from storage example:database players[{UUID:[I;1053791990,1396853425,-1507258222,1827308080]}] 

And if there is an object with this UUID in storage, then this entire object will be copied to storage example:macro this.
But if this is not the case, then example:macro this will not be created in storage, and you can check whether this object exists and, depending on this, run the function of adding new player data to storage (example:uuid/new), or the macro function of restoring scoreboards (example:uuid/restore):

# function example:uuid/check execute if data storage example:macro this run function example:uuid/restore with storage example:macro this execute unless data storage example:macro this run function example:uuid/new 

Restoring scoreboards

Now all that remains is to create a function for restoring scoreboards from the old nickname.
After running this function (example:uuid/restore), you need to update the nickname in storage for this player.
Note: If you wish, you can also keep a history of nickname changes, additionally storing the old nickname if you want.
To update a player's nickname, run the get player nickname function (example:uuid/get_nickname) created when you created the function to add a new player's data to storage and replace the received nickname in the main storage example:database:

# function example:uuid/restore function example:uuid/get_nickname $data modify storage example:database players[{UUID:$(UUID)}].Name set from storage example:macro this.Name 

Note: The function example:uuid/get_nickname will change example:macro this which was used when running the macro function example:uuid/restore*, but this will not affect the inserted data in this function in any way, since the insertion of data into the function occurs when the macro function is run, but before any commands are executed.*
Next you need to add copy commands for each scoreboard you want to restore for that player. This have the following pattern:

$scoreboard players operation @s  = $(Name)  

The only exception is ID score, since scoreboard ID is directly stored in storage:

# function example:uuid/restore $scoreboard players set @s ID $(ID) $scoreboard players operation @s coins = $(Name) coins $scoreboard players operation @s play_time = $(Name) play_time 

And there is one last detail left - you need to reset all the scores of the player with the old nickname:

# function example:uuid/restore $scoreboard players reset $(Name) 

Ready. Now any player who changes their nickname will automatically restore all the scoreboards they had before changing their nickname.
Below is a complete example of the entire datapack without comments. You can edit this code to suit your needs:

# function example:load execute unless entity 3ecf96f6-5342-4ab1-a629-10926cea8230 run summon item_display ~ ~ ~ {UUID:[I;1053791990,1396853425,-1507258222,1827308080]} scoreboard objectives add ID dummy scoreboard objectives add coins dummy scoreboard objectives add level level scoreboard objectives add play_time custom:play_time # function example:tick execute as @a unless score @s ID = @s ID run function example:uuid/check # function example:uuid/check data remove storage example:macro this function example:uuid/find with entity @s execute if data storage example:macro this run function example:uuid/restore with storage example:macro this execute unless data storage example:macro this run function example:uuid/new # function example:uuid/find $data modify storage example:macro this from storage example:database players[{UUID:$(UUID)}] # function example:uuid/new execute store result score @s ID store result storage example:macro this.ID int 1 run scoreboard players add #new ID 1 data modify storage example:macro this.UUID set from entity @s UUID function example:uuid/get_nickname data modify storage example:database players append from storage example:macro this # function example:uuid/get_nickname loot replace entity 3ecf96f6-5342-4ab1-a629-10926cea8230 container.0 loot example:player_head data modify storage example:macro this.Name set from entity 3ecf96f6-5342-4ab1-a629-10926cea8230 item.components."minecraft:profile".name ## For 1.20.2 - 1.20.4 use: ## data modify storage example:macro this.Name set from entity 3ecf96f6-5342-4ab1-a629-10926cea8230 item.tag.SkullOwner.Name # function example:uuid/restore function example:uuid/get_nickname $data modify storage example:database players[{UUID:$(UUID)}].Name set from storage example:macro this.Name $scoreboard players set @s ID $(ID) $scoreboard players operation @s coins = $(Name) coins $scoreboard players operation @s play_time = $(Name) play_time $scoreboard players reset $(Name) # loot_table example:player_head { "pools": [ { "rolls": 1, "entries": [ { "type": "minecraft:item", "name": "minecraft:player_head", "functions": [ { "function": "minecraft:fill_player_head", "entity": "this" } ] } ] } ] } 

Hello. I am using old farm fence posts to make a 10m x 10m chicken enclosure.
What is a good cheap option for rails to hang the mesh from?
Alternatively I string wire between posts and hang mesh on that. Is there an easy way to do strainer posts for a lighter load like chicken fencing?

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Hello there!
This is gonna be a hellishly weird one. Ive been DMing my game for almost 2 years now (a bit insane, considering how I had no idea for the story at the start and was just kinda messing around). Throughout that 2 years, my party has built their own story, revolving around gods, demons/devils, and the relationship mortals can build with them.
So far, they've pushed to the point where the 7 devils that act as the Prime Sins are all either dead (by their hands) or their allies. Originally they blamed the Fates, but I really wasnt cool with them killing the Fates, so I shifted it... The strife they've been through has been entirely the fault of a dying God of Entertainment. This being said, they're determined to fight and kill him. I'm beyond okay with this! He was kinda made to be a sacrifice for my little immortal-murdering hobos, but the closer we toe towards the battle, the more nervous I'm getting
Stat wise, I can easily build the guy, that's no problem, but I wanna give them a gift; an animatic of said God introducing himself. After all, this being had been orchestrating their lives from the sidelines for years now, pulling the strings to create perfect entertainment for Gods and Devils alike. I want the final battle to take place in this God's domain, with the majority of Heaven and Hell there to witness it. My issue is this God's appearance.
I NEED IDEAS! What do you think when you picture a god of entertainment? I know I want him to be energetic, seemingly always excited/full of nervous energy, and boisterous as hell. The inspiration behind him is the song The Greatest Show from The Greatest Showman. In terms of him dying (and knowing he's dying), I picture him as being a nearly forgotten God who's power is weakening rapidly due to it. I don't want him to be an easy kill, but I would like this to be incorporated into the design. After all, this entertainment he has created for immortals is his "final act", a magnum opus where he knew he'd fight the party by the end.
If you have any ideas, please shoot them my way! I really want to get a design down so I can start animating this little thing for the party 💖 Thank you!!!!

Tetsu was on the TV program "This is a side note, but..." on 5/15 alongside Hisashi from GLAY. You can watch the program here with a VPN set to Japan (available until 5/22): https://tver.jp/episodes/epp2yhtg7y
Some highlights:

• Tetsu and Hisashi talked about how L'Arc and GLAY were portrayed as rivals, and this fueled each band to outdo the other. Tetsu said since GLAY had a concert with 200,000 people in one day (setting the Guinness world record at the time), L'Arc decided to do the Grand Cross tour with 125,000 people each day over two days. And since GLAY released two singles simultaneously in 1998, L'Arc decided to release three singles and then two albums simultaneously.
• L'Arc and GLAY played in the same concert in their indies days in 1992. Tetsu doesn't remember, but Hisashi said that one of GLAY's staff members told them, "You guys suck, go watch L'Arc's rehearsal and learn from them!" So all four members of GLAY lined up to watch L'Arc's rehearsal. Hisashi thought that they were really good, no wonder they're popular!
• Tetsu told the story of how he met Hyde and kept trying to persuade Hyde to join him even though Hyde already had his own band. He went to all of Hyde's band's concerts and tried to persuade Hyde to join him at the afterparties, even though Hyde's bandmates were right there too. The interviewer asked if the other members couldn't compare to Hyde, and Tetsu said, "It seemed like only Hyde was shining."
• Tetsu also told the story of how he started playing bass at age 14 from Ken's recommendation, and how he originally though bass would be easier than guitar because bass only has four strings rather than six. "Yes! Ken-senpai! What's a bass?" And then after seeing the bass and how big it is, he wondered why he has to play bass when he's smaller than Ken.
• Tetsu also talked about when Hyde quit the band in 2002. Hyde sent a letter to Tetsu that was delivered to him by a staff member. Tetsu said Hyde would only come to such a conclusion after thinking about it for a long time, so he thought there was no way to change his mind and accepted the decision. The four of them got together to talk and they decided to disband. But then a staff member told Tetsu, "If you're the leader, you should stop him!" And then Tetsu thought for the first time, "I'm supposed to stop him??" Then he and Hyde talked just the two of them, and he managed to persuade Hyde to try to stay with the band for a bit longer.
  • Hisashi said, "That staff member was saying what everyone was thinking!" And one of the hosts said, "You definitely had to stop him! Our youth!!"
• The PVs for Driver's High, Hitomi no Juunin, and Finale each cost 100 million yen to make! (Tetsu said the Pieces PV also cost that much to make on his radio show.) Tetsu said he received offers to appear in movies in the past, but the movies had a smaller budget than their PVs, so he thought there's no point being in those movies. (At the exchange rate in 1999, that amount was equivalent to roughly $877,000.)
• A kid asked Hisashi and Tetsu what are their favorite fruits. Tetsu's is melon!
• Another kid asked if GLAY and L'Arc members ever fight, and said it seems like at least GLAY get along well. 😂 Hisashi confirmed that the GLAY members all get along well since they started as friends in the same high school who formed a band together, but commented that L'Arc isn't like that, right?
• Tetsu said that he tends to make suggestions, but they get rejected by the other members. Ideas in general tend to get shelved if even one member is somewhat against it. He also said that the L'Arc members tend to talk to each other through staff members. One time, another member got really mad at Tetsu, but he only heard about it through the staff. Since they don't talk to each other about the issues directly, he feels that it's easy to be misunderstood since the messages change when they're passed through multiple staff members. Tetsu said he's working hard to change this setup because it's definitely not good.
• One kid asked how much money do GLAY and L'Arc have. Hisashi said he's an employee of GLAY's company (label) and gets a salary from it. Tetsu was really curious about that and said to Hisashi that he wants to hear more about their structure. Hisashi said GLAY has their own company and they run their own management, and the members are employees of the company.
• Hisashi said they actually make a lot of money from the streaming services! Even just in one month, it's a lot of money. Tetsu was really surprised that Hisashi knows these numbers, because he doesn't see them, and also L'Arc is probably set up so that the "adults" get most of the money, not the band. So he wants to change that structure.
• Another kid asked what are their favorite cars. Tetsu's is Ferarri from the 60s and 70s.
• Another question was if the bands have any plans to retire. Tetsu said no!

The whole show was really interesting! But the part about the management structure and Tetsu being interested in GLAY having their own label was especially so. Tetsu said on his radio show that the reason why L'Arc isn't that active is not because the members are too busy with solo projects -- there are a lot of problems with the label, management, staff, and music copyrights. He wants to change various aspects of it because he doesn't think it's right that they have to stay with the same team from the time they debuted 30 years ago. I had read various reports in the Japanese media about things like L'Arc's label didn't pay them the appropriate fees and that they released a DVD without the members' consent. Supposedly, Tetsu and Hyde want to leave the label, but Ken is against it and Yukihiro is on the fence. It's hard to know how much of these reports is true, but seeing Tetsu on this show speaking openly about his dissatisfaction with the management structure makes me think there is some degree of truth to those reports.
I was curious about how GLAY came to form their own label, and it turns out they were engaged in a lawsuit with their former label over similar issues (unpaid fees, music copyright).
After the show, Hisashi tweeted that he wants to do a joint concert with L'Arc! He's the third member of GLAY to say this recently (Teru and Takuro said the same thing on a radio show last month). The tweet currently has over 6 million views, and lots of fans are excited and hoping that a GLAY x L'Arc concert can become a reality! But they're wondering where such a large concert could be held because it probably needs a capacity of at least 100k or 200k, and the war for tickets would be a bloodbath.

TW: Cheating
I [28M] am currently spiraling. I just came from a long-term relationship (4 years) due to several issues starting with her cheating on me with a workmate. I tried to forgive her with the stipulation that we will put in the work to fix the relationship. I called it off last January after four months of trying (and several other unrelated problems) because I really felt no effort coming from her and I felt burdened to carry the responsibility of it alone.
Today, during one of my daily meetings at work, a co-worker mentioned the phrase "bakit kung kailan" with an inquiry relating to an ongoing project. It suddenly took me back to November (a few months after the cheating incident) when I told her that she's losing me because of the lack of effort from her side. She answered me with "Paano nangyari na kung kailan ako nagsabing I'll stay with you, tsaka ka nahirapan?" The circumstances of this sentence is also a long-story and is not the point of this mini-rant.
The point is why, even after four months of broken up, almost two months of no regular communication, am I still hung up on her? Why is it so easy and random to trigger me? Why do her words stick with me, like a fly on a honeytrap? I'm trying my best to move on and there are days when I can convince myself that I'm better than yesterday. How come that a simple string of words is enough to bring me back where I was four, five months ago?
Fuck cheaters. Fuck you. I want to spend my life happy. Pero ang hirap because every cell of mine still clings to the idea of you. Every memory, every word, every waking hour reminds me of you. Fuck you. Fuck you for hurting me, despite all my effort to love you. and fuck you for hurting me still kahit wala ka na sa buhay ko.

Background

I've been working with an all-in-one command project for the past few years and I believe I have fully perfected my format for using all in one commands. The goal of an all-in-one format is to accomplish many commands as wanted, in one command, hence the name. Command blocks have a character limit of 32,500 (this limit only applies in its gui: if you can source a command block with more than that by modded sources other than direct copy/paste, this limit is not applied). It seems like plenty, but it fills up pretty fast even with more optimizations than I ever thought possible. So I made more optimizations to the base way I even use an all-in-one.
It accomplishes a working all-in-one with 451 characters, and uses an additional 39 characters per additional command before actually caring about how many characters the command itself uses. This is, by far, the best I have found, and it's fairly simple too, with a bunch of neat tricks.

Other formats

Most of the time, I see some kinda format with a dying armor stand to separate the falling blocks. No offense to whoever made that, but... what were you thinking? The armor stand doesn't even have predetermined death time nbt??? So you are already committed to waiting a full second before it can even think about running??? When I see an all-in-one these days, it's usually this one which I don't know where it originated from.
There's also mrgarretto - Sure, it's nice if you wanted ye olde style all-in-one-command box, but it's generally not that efficient. It doesn't even work in modern versions, the activator rail falls through the redstone block and doesn't get placed. I'll pretend that's not a problem for now. Once again, it's nice if you want something simple and fast, and it even optimizes the command block layout for you, but that's just about it. Heck it even uses two commands just to get its command blocks activated, like.. WHY. YOU COULD HAVE JUST PUT THE AUTO AND COMMAND DATA IN THE SETBLOCK COMMAND. There's also a random STONE block in the base of the structure, and then it puts the command block to delete it, that's right, off to the side? The most reasonable thing is that it setblocks a redstone block next to the command that removes the all in one structure, in order to delay it a tick, but that's not even necessary as of one of the 1.19 versions (this is why it's somewhat reasonable), and now you can just set a command block as auto by default and it'll still have the delay. Even then, it could have used a different command to data merge it to auto, but instead it used a redstone block, which is only reasonable if it already doesn't care about space. All of this makes somewhat sense though, as it hasn't been deliberately updated to work nicely in modern versions.
Anyways that was my rant about other formats w/web generators. Moving on.

My format

As I'm sure some people will ask, is it a generator? Short answer, no. I have no intention of making it into a generator and nor do I recommend it, half of this is because I don't know html, the other half is because it is simply too limited unless you already make use of a million possible configurations. Sure, it's easy to input a few commands and let it do the work for you, but by the time you care enough to get into specifics and more advanced command, you might as well already be familiar enough with the nbt to just do it manually. This is how I do it and it just makes the most practical sense in terms of a long-term project: it's not even that much more effort. The hardest part about working without a generator is getting into the habit of removing all of the line-return characters before copying the command, to make use of as many possible characters as you can. This of course assumes you already separate command by line, which, you really should. Personally, I work with my all-in-one's in vscode for minecraft-specific text highlighting and easy multi-line editing with middle click.
Anyways, getting to the point, this is my all-in-one:

summon falling_block ~ ~1.8 ~ {BlockState:{Name:redstone_block},Motion:[.0,-2.0],Passengers:[{id:falling_block,BlockState:{Name:activator_rail},Passengers:[{id:command_block_minecart,Command:"gamerule commandBlockOutput false"},{id:command_block_minecart,Command:"setblock ~ ~-2 ~ repeating_command_block{auto:1,Command:'fill ~ ~ ~ ~ ~2 ~ air'}"}, {id:command_block_minecart,Command:"say Efficient All In One Format! Made by Lizard16."}, {id:command_block_minecart,Command:"execute align xz run kill [type=command_block_minecart,dy=0]"}]}]} 

Three parts, the start, the content, and the end. This runs as fast as possible: on the 4th tick after it was placed. This is due to a limitation in the way command block minecart delay must have been coded: they physically cannot run until the 4th tick of their life. Then on the 5th tick, the command block is activated that destroys the structure due to necessary delay due to command execution order. It works by summoning a falling block, the redstone block to power the command block minecarts, with its a passenger of the activator rail. Because the redstone block lands immediately, the activator rail stays in place where it was when summoned. The command block minecarts are then passengers of the activator rail, and the activator rail lands on its 4th tick: this does 2 things: make it impossible to move the minecarts with a player hitbox before they are ready to activate, and remove the completely quiet sound that minecarts make when landing for some reason that takes up the sound cap for some reason. The kill command is run as an execute command to do two things: to make it only kill the command block minecarts part of the structure, and to make it work on servers with the essentials plugin. It also turns off command block output every time: which is needed the first time, but can be skipped in future times, but there's no reason to not include it. Generally I respect people's gamerule choices: this is not one of them, there is literally no useful reason for command block output to be on, other than potentially debugging, but even then, just look at the command's last output instead of chat.
To use it, just copy the middle line, paste on a new line, and write the next command in the string. The commands are completely deterministic and they are run in the precise order they are as passengers.
The only "problem" with it is that it doesn't bother to check if the space above it is empty before summoning, because that'll use more characters for a mostly useless function. Everyone who has ever seen any kind of all-in-one should know they use vertical space, and I won't be concerning myself with this issue. However, I once again take pride in the fact that mine requires the least amount of empty space that I've seen, at a whole three blocks: the command block to run the command, the redstone block, and the activator rail.
If you already have the commands for a desired all-in-one, then any text editor that allows you to edit multiple lines separately will be easy to apply this to, I use vscode. Something else I like to do is align the lines such that the command is at the beginning, and at the end of that command, the formatting for the next command block minecart starts and ends there, which means most of the formatting for a command lies in the line above it. It's a bit weird to get used to but I think it's somewhat nicer to edit with.
Overall, it's nothing fancy: just the base format for making an all-in-one work, and to my knowledge, the optimizations I have made have made it the smallest one there is, which is useful to people like me who have a hard time fitting what they want in the character limit even with an insane amount of optimization: every character helps.
If I forgot anything or there's anything I aut to add, let me know!

I recently sold a vintage fine jewelry bracelet. Surprisingly, it didn't pass Authentication because they said it wasn't stamped. The bracelet is stamped and photo was in description and easy to find. I appealed the decision and ebay, also Surprisingly, sided with me and made up for the lost sale. Has this happened to anybody before? Should I avoid reselling this item? It seems that when the authenticator has a backlog, their work is sloppy. Any insight would be appreciated.

I feel like I’m consistently choosing the wrong men and it’s just so exhausting and frustrating. I know I have a lot to offer: I’m a kind and genuine person. I’m independent, have a good career, and I work hard to support myself financially. I’m smart and attractive. I’ve been told that I’m fun and easy to talk to. I’m also open-minded and I love trying new things.
However, when it comes to choosing men I literally always fall for the wrong guys. I like men who are outgoing, smart, funny, and confident: the kind of guys that walk into a room and their presence is felt. Usually, things start off great, but eventually the men I fall for show their true colors and become manipulative, controlling, and selfish. It’s like they wait until they know I’m invested in them, and then completely flip the switch. I regularly fall for men who string me along. I go out of my way to help the men I care about, but it seems like it’s never enough. There’s usually a lot of gaslighting, criticism, emotional manipulation, and lies. I always end up feeling heartbroken and used.
My ex and I were married and our relationship very much followed this pattern. In the end it got so bad. He literally used an old phone of mine to access my cloud so he could read all my messages, access my socials, email, etc, and view my location. He secretly contacted my parents and tried to make it seem like I was mentally unstable. He would say terrible things to me. Weaponized incompetence was a norm. I was working two jobs to pay our bills and I was doing the majority of household labor and childcare duties, but he was always criticizing me. He made no effort to connect with me - after over a year of being married I discovered during a fight that he literally didn’t know where I worked or exactly what I did for work even though I regularly talked to him about these things. It was insane!
After we separated I started casually seeing this guy from work. My marriage had just ended and his girlfriend was in an extended stay facility (they agreed on an open relationship while she was gone). The feelings eventually deepened on both sides and it became something more than casual. He assured me that he wanted me in his life, but when his girlfriend got back he needed to support her in her recovery. I understood this, but he also told me he would find a way to talk to her about it because he didn’t want to lose me. One night he got emotional and started crying while we were talking about what would happen with us. I honestly believed that he cared about me. We carried on for a while after she got back because I thought what we had was real and that he just needed time to figure things out, but obviously it was all bullshit. Slowly he started pushing me away and acting super shitty until I cut contact.
These are just two examples, but it’s been a pattern throughout my entire adult dating life. I’ve been in therapy for a few months now and I’m trying to work through the root of my issues that keep leading me to choose these men. I haven’t dated in months because I know I need to work through my past before I’m ready for a healthy relationship. Has anyone else experienced this? Why do I seem to keep attracting men who manipulate me and treat me like I’m disposable? How do you see through the bullshit and know when you’ve found a good man?

Standard disclaimer: In this post I'll attempt a summary of our City Council meetings this past week. As ever, I make no claim of these notes being comprehensive of everything we covered, nor that they will reflect the perspective of any other person or Councilor besides myself (Kit). This Council meeting is already published on Medford Community Media.
And if you’d like to follow along, here is the meeting agenda on the City Council’s public portal. We took items out of order on Tuesday, but I’ll go in order of the agenda.
Our meeting started on a delightful note. At our previous meeting, on the motion of Councilor Tseng, we invited the MHS Orchestra to play in the Chambers in celebration of their gold medal win at the prestigious Massachusetts Instrumental and Chorus Conductor’s Association Concert Festival. I was genuinely so moved and impressed by their performance on Tuesday. We administered citations to all members of the Middle School String Ensemble, who took home the silver medal at the same Festival, and trophies to all members of the High School Orchestra. Congratulations to all the players and Conductor Chang!
We debuted a new agenda section, “Refer to Committee for Further Discussion,” with a motion by Councilor Leming. (This new section is for items that are intended not to be debated on the floor, but rather just introduced and sent immediately to committee where substantive discussions will be held.) Councilor Leming’s resolution was to explore ways to allow the Director of Veterans’ Services to offer housing incentives to veteran renters. Director Shaw shared a bit about her preliminary ideas for incentives that might help combat how veterans are often stigmatized/disadvantaged in housing searches. This sad topic shores up a point that the Council has heard recently, how housing (unaffordability, precariousness, homelessness) is one of the most critical issues facing veterans in Medford. Councilors offered some initial words of enthusiasm for these ideas but held further questions and comments for when this matter is taken up in the Resident Services and Public Engagement Committee.
We unanimously approved the Action Plan for this year’s Community Development Block Grant (CDBG) funding appropriation. The previous week, we had a Committee of the Whole where the CDBG Manager and funding recipients gave more detailed presentations about their work in the community that will be funded by CDBG this year. Many of the funding recipients are returning from previous years, and this funding allows them to continue their work in Medford on the program priority areas, with services such as housing resources, and food and transit assistance.
We unanimously approved the special permit for extended hours for Pinky’s Pizza. We first discussed this two weeks ago and tabled it, asking the business owner to speak with neighbors to try and come to a mutually agreeable compromise, and allowing the Licensing Subcommittee Chair to look into the topic more deeply. The business owner came back this week with a scaled-back request, just to midnight Monday–Thursday and until 1am Friday–Sunday, which we approved. (11pm is the default close of business time unless otherwise requested.)
We unanimously approved a Lodging House License for 28 Winthrop St., which is a Tufts University-owned property. In recent years Tufts purchased this building and did a significant remodel to modernize, improve and densify the building; it will now fit 28 students, 1 student per room. Any students who live in the building will park their cars on campus. The building has already been approved by the Community Development Board and passed all inspections, so this vote was just a one-time license approval so that it can go forth and be operated as a dorm. I appreciate Tufts investing in housing more of their students in dense, high-quality student housing near (and ideally on) Tufts campus.
We reviewed and filed the Annual Public Report on Surveillance Technology. Under the Community Control over Public Surveillance (CCOPS) Ordinance which passed in 2023, this is the City Council’s reporting obligation. Under CCOPS, all new surveillance technologies or uses of surveillance data by City departments must be approved by the City Council. This report documents, in the previous calendar year, how many new technology/data requests the Council has approved, denied, or made modifications to, as well as including copies of any Surveillance Reports by City departments that are using surveillance technology.
As lead sponsor of the CCOPS Ordinance, I prepared the Annual Public Report. It was easy to do because currently, the only eligible surveillance technology in use by a City department are body worn cameras, which are in use by the MPD as of December. In finalizing/negotiating the ordinance in 2023, we exempted body worn cameras from the City Council approval process until 2028. So the number of new-technology requests approved, denied or modified by the Council in 2023 was zero. If folks are interested in reading more about CCOPS, I wrote about it in April 2023 after the ordinance passed.
We reviewed an Open Meeting Law complaint that was filed against the City Council for something I wrote in a Reddit post in April. Per law, upon receipt of an Open Meeting Law complaint, the Council is required to review the complaint in a regular meeting and decide on a response. Prior to the meeting, one of the City’s KP Law attorneys reviewed the complaint, found that no violation occurred, and drafted a response to that effect. We reviewed and unanimously approved the attorney’s response. (TLDR on OML: A quorum of a public body debating a matter that is before that body, outside of a duly-noticed public meeting, would be a violation of Open Meeting Law. The intent of the law is to ensure that all discussions about matters before a public body, by that public body, are happening in public with proper notice to the public.)
On the motion of Councilor Scarpelli, we unanimously passed a resolution to support H.4624, “An Act relative to municipal tax lien procedures and protections for property owners in the Commonwealth.” Here’s some background from WCVB.
We entered Executive Session to discuss various matters of litigation/claims with a City attorney. Entering executive session means the Council talks privately about a specific topic – no public Zoom, no TV cameras, no audience. There is a limited set of circumstances under which public bodies are allowed to do this, which includes discussing strategy with respect to litigation.
This might be my briefest report yet. I’m sure the next one will be longer! Thanks for reading.

alright second try. maybe I can trim the fat a little on this attempt and make it a bit more streamlined.
so the first thing is deciding how many strands to use, and to avoid complicating things on your first try just trust me you'll want to choose an even number.
beginnings:
I almost exclusively do 4 strands as a flat braid with paracord, but that comes with a couple complications of its own involving the finger loop and the pouch design, so I am going to write this for a 6 strand braid, which for most of the sling will be a 3-strand braiding pattern using doubled strands, so 6 total...
...but in order to do the finger loop right you actually want to cut 3 strands at double the full desired length, plus some room for error etc. so for a 54" sling cut 3 lengths of cord at 120" each (and just for convenience go ahead and melt the ends sealed)
line them up alongside one another and fold your bundle in half, but to avoid tangling and confusion keep the 2 halves a little separated. you'll start working on the middle of the bundle.
finger loop:
take the very middle, then choke up a few inches (technically this will amount to the circumference of the finger loop but it doesn't have to be perfect here). tie a slipknot a few inches up from the very middle binding the 3 cords together, and start braiding them together on the long side starting at the knot.
the repeat rule through this whole effort is TIGHT, EVEN braids. if it starts looking wonky, just take it apart and try to fix it bc the further you go the more impossible any corrections will become.
after you get a few inches of braid, loop it around to see how big the finger loop is. you want it wide enough to easily slip past the knuckles on your middle finger (even if that's not the finger you use when you actually sling, you should still make it big enough). when you get there, clothespin the braid closed and untie the slipknot. now you’re gonna tighten up that end of the braid and maybe even add a little length.
stack your braid ends one on top of the other to form the finger loop and make sure each braid's last working strand is pointing in the same direction.
you’re going to pair each strand with its counterpart one by one, and continue the braid as a doubled up 3-strand pattern. this will merge the ends of the finger loop together seamlessly and begin the retention cord.
if this sounds complicated, it's honestly pretty straightforward once you're actually doing it (this sentiment might come up again a couple times fyi)
retention cord:
braiding the retention cord is easy, it's the same 3-strand pattern just with doubled strands now. keep the doubled strands parallel and pull them very tight with each braid you lay down, wrapping them around as you go (again... you'll see what I mean).
knee:
once you get the right length on the retention cord (I didn’t do the math here, but it's not complicated), you'll separate the braid into 2 bundles of 3, each to be braided into the sides of the split pouch.
rather than laying out exactly which strand goes where to make it most even, I think you'll do fine figuring it out on your own. honestly you just want the sides to be as balanced as possible.
a good practice is to braid one side a couple inches, clothespin it, then braid the other side a couple inches. now go back to the first one, undo the braid, pull everything super tight again and braid a couple inches again; then repeat on the other side. this really helps pull out the slack that inevitably builds up.
pouch:
braid each side to the appropriate length (math...), taking turns between them and regularly checking they are well balanced.
we will do a little more to beef up the pouch a bit once we finish the release cord. that is when you can add a Channing type smile if you want, too.
belly:
again, make sure each pouch braid's last working strand points in the same direction and all the strands are pulled tight.
you will rejoin the pouch in a similar way as you did for the finger loop, but this time side by side instead of stacked. this is probably the trickiest part of the whole process, and it might take a couple tries to get it right but it's not too hard. if it's just not working for you, you can get away with joining them stacked instead of side by side and the sling will still work fine - it's just better to do it side by side.
just make sure you keep pulling all the strands tight as you go, and that you are pairing the appropriate strands with one another.
don’t hesitate to take it apart and give it another try if it doesn't look or feel right - it's reasonably important to get this part right since it is the part of the sling that most directly affects how projectiles will release.
release cord:
hey you're at least 3/4 done now. if you want you can just keep doing the same 6 strand, doubled-up 3 strand pattern for the entite length of the release cord - but it's generally advised to drop out strands from the braid periodically to form a steady taper until the very end of the release cord is the same thickness as the finger loop.
it's very easy to do, and I usually just feel it out as I go - it doesn't have to be a perfect taper. you'll drop one cord at a time, so you'll start with 6 strands, braid for a bit... drop to 5 and braid some more; then 4 for a bit, and finally 3 for the remainder - so it does help to learn how to do a 5- and 4-strand braid...
...but honestly it should be ok if you do your 5-strand portion by continuing with the same 3 doubled-up strand pattern, just one of them is a single strand now.
also, whenever you drop a strand don't cut it or anything, just leave it out of the braid and let it hang for now.
same deal when you hit 4 strands - you could learn the braid or just continue the same pattern you've been doing but now only one strand is doubled. doing it like that with the 5 and 4 strand portions will kinda make the cord less... idk 'uniform'(?) than if you were to use the appropriate braid patterns, but all in all it shouldn't be an issue.
lastly, of course, dropping from 4 to 3 should be pretty simple.
release:
I like a smooth release without a knot, but if you want to add a knot you just have to make sure it's in the exact right place so that the very center of the pouch will be the lowest point of the sling when you put the finger loop on and grip the release as you will when it's time to use it. only way to determine that is to put it on your finger and try it out.
if you think it'll help, go ahead and place a projectile in the pouch then hold the sling just as you would if you were getting ready to incapacitate a philistine giant - this will help you find the exact spot where it's most comfortable and natural to grip the release cord and keep the pouch centered.
note: this is actually part of why I prefer to skip the release knot... if you experiment with different ways of holding and releasing etc. - which you probably should if you’re new to slinging - the knot kinda locks you in place. I haven't heard a good argument in favor of the knot actually; it seems like there's no real advantage to having it and it kinda gets in the way
use a crown knot, which is super easy w 3 strands but I’m not going to explain it here - it's all over youtube you'll have no trouble finding a 20 second video demonstrating this simple knot.
you can terminate the sling right at the release knot if you want, but I strongly recommend continuing for a few inches past it - and if you skip the knot, definitely continue a few inches past the portion you'll be gripping.
end the braid with a crown knot then cut and melt the ends of each cord to seal them. melting paracord ends is sort of a skill on its own, but if you do it right it bulges a little and hardens in place which will hold your knot together.
tassle: (how do you spell tassle? is it tassel?)
you don’t need a tassle but hey why not? since you've got plenty of paracord cut like 7" and pull out the inner strands - the guts.
you can thread them through the crown knot for extra security, then braid them together for a few inches - or you can just make a braid and tie it to the end. either way works fine. I like to braid the tassle a bit then let it hang loose for another couple inches into a natural fray, rather than closing the braid with a knot. honestly doesn't matter much, but do leave an unbraided portion as a fray.
pouch afterwork:
you could leave the pouch as is, but it's nice to make it a little beefier and more durable. I just use some more paracord to wrap it. you can use the axe-handle wrap method, which is basically just a series of alternating overhand knots around a core - typically a tool handle but in this case each of the sides of your pouch.
a much, much better way is a 'solomon bar' which is like paracord 101... it's how you make everything - key fobs, bracelets, dog leashes, belts, etc. it's hard to explain, but easy to learn from a video lol. just remember that any video you watch about it will show you how to create a core, then create the knot pattern around it, usually using like one strand of cord - you just need the knot technique since the core you'll tie it around is, again, each of the sides of the pouch.
I've never tried the 'smile' but it seems easy enough - just kinda minimally thread a single strand of cord across the center gap to prevent your projectiles from falling through (honestly it's just not a problem I have often enough to warrant a solution like that)
afterwork/finishing touches:
the hanging strands you dropped out for the taper... just cut those and melt them sealed. easy enough.
you can wrap the finger loop too, if you want. I'd go ahead and do that if you wind up using it often enough, and I recommend something soft like cotton twine... but paracord does work fine too.
end/concluding notes:
and there you go.... idk how much experience you have using a sling, but that's outside the scope of this for me lol - one thing I will say though if you haven't used one before: start with tennis balls or something that can’t knock anybody out or break windows, please!
and lastly, if this does seem like more than you're willing to undertake... there are easier options for sure.
seatbelt sling:
my favorite sling that isn’t a natural fiber balaeric type is the second one I ever made, which took me 10 minutes after watching the video by Mersa - a seatbelt sling. it just uses canvas type material for the pouch and single strands for the cords. look it up. mine gets used all the time and has never needed any repairs or adjustments
noodle sling:
literally takes less than 5 minutes and uses a single uncut cord with easy knots to form the loop and the pouch. you do need a slightly thicker cord though. I’ve made a few of these and they also work great.
anyway, good luck - I'll keep an eye on notifications if you need any help or anything.
it's super satisfying to use a sling you made yourself, and if you're like me at all you'll wind up making like a dozen of them just out of boredom until you get the technique down perfect and even come up with your own ideas and techniques to try out.
just wait until you start getting into the traditional natural fiber methods and you wind up watching the Archaic Arms videos 30x

Hello, hello.
I've recently set myself on the path of astrocartography to figure out the relative positions of a series of stars that are potential candidates for hosting Dyson "Spheres".
This is a rather involved process however as it starts with pulling the Galactic IAU coordinates from the ESA archives, then plugging the coordinates into the NASA/IPAC Extragalactic Database. Unfortunately, the stars in question only have auto generated WISE and 2MASS IDs, so there's no easy tracking them down otherwise, I can plug the coordinates into Google Sky and find near by systems/objects, but then I need to triangulate the position of the star I'm looking for...
The next steps are rather convoluted as I use SkyAtlas to find the nearest star to the position by cross referencing with the prior information, and then...it's not the best system, but I use Elite: Dangerous as the core program for the final triangulation since for the most part it uses real stars in their real positions (you can search by various star names, eg. HR, HD, HIP, etc. and it provides the other names as well). I was able to confirm this using stars like 46 Gamma Hydrae, Kraz, and a series of HIP stars, and cross referencing distances from Universe Guide and Wikipediea for this project, it's been accurate also for prior projects, but those were using much more common stars and nebula, so it was a much easier process.
For reference and/or those that want to do some research themselves;
This is the ESA's GAIA data base link https://gea.esac.esa.int/archive/ The following ID strings "Gaia DR3 #" need to be entered in whole to the Single Object search tool
Gaia DR3 3496509309189181184 Gaia DR3 4843191593270342656 Gaia DR3 4649396037451459712 Gaia DR3 2660349163149053824 Gaia DR3 3190232820489766656 Gaia DR3 2956570141274256512 Gaia DR3 2644370304260053376
(This is only a part of the list as there's ~60 candidates in total, but this is the first batch and I've spent way to many hours just trying to get the first one's location settled.)
From the results, take the Galactic (IAU) Coordinates and plug them into the NED cone search https://ned.ipac.caltech.edu/conesearch Keeping the cone small ensures you don't get bogged down with too much data, unfortunately there's not much that helps determine their positions from what I can tell. And even near by stars are all auto-generated names so finding anything nearby that's been studied in depth already is difficult at least. I've found that Google Sky is better with nearby objects to your coordinate search, but it only has info on big and well researched objects.
That's where SkyAtlas https://skyatlas.app/ comes in, at least both this and Google Sky have the Messier objects listed, so it's possible to narrow things down a bit and find something relatively close with a usable name.
For the first one on the worklist, I found HIP 62180 to be nearest star with any prominence, I plugged this into Elite: Dangerous, and started eyeballing it with relative position to/from Sol, I found some near by stars that matched the approximate distance and angle, and narrowed this down, since there's a lot of stars in such a small field of view and I used Universe Guide https://www.universeguide.com/ to confirm the star's distances from Sol, cross referenced with data from Wikipedia, and the rest is history, in theory, the first target star should be within 2-3 Light years of 46 Gamma Hydrae, not showing up in most databases given it's a relatively new find and a rather dark red dwarf.
It should be noted that the ESA, NED, etc. don't have star distances provided, and without the saving grace of the approximate distances being provided in the research documents on these anomalous stars, I doubt that this process would have been able to get as far as it has.
The distances for these objects are as follows;
142.9 ± 1.0 211.6 ± 3.5 219.4 ± 6.2 211.5 ± 5.8 274.7 ± 6.1 265.0 ± 2.6 249.9 ± 3.7
So, that all said, I am quite the amateur when it comes to all this, astronomy has been a passion since being very young, and my purposes for such hard research is mostly for semi-hard scifi story telling. One of the ongoing projects is making a top down star map of notable systems, nebulae, etc, and finding the positions of these stars with potential dyson spheres is a fairly critical task now. HOWEVER. This is a very cumbersome process and I feel like there should be an easier means of finding the data I need to make a map....but many of the resources that seem like would be of benefit don't exist anymore, there was a very active astrocartography network that existed during the late 00's and early 10's with well put together flat star maps, but many of the sites and resources don't exist anymore and the wayback machine wasn't able to take snapshots of the dynamic programs used to provide said custom star maps.
My query is such; Does anyone have anything that might help streamline this process? Are there any databases or programs that would reduce the number of steps required to get the information I need?
I've done regular searches for star maps and such, but aside from things like SkyAtlas, which doesn't really help aside from cross reference, or star maps of 50LY or closer, there doesn't seem to be much of value on the net anymore. And as a final thought, I *can* make the process a bit shorter if I'm looking to just approximate a star's position in a flat image, but it feels a bit "cheap" to have a rough location without narrowing it down to at least a neighboring star within 10LY.
Thanks in advance, and I hope that the links and info provided help spark some research goals for others!

I went to a local jewelry store (not a chain) that has their own workshop in the back. I gave them two rings. One I needed resized -- it was this ring (https://www.lakaiser.com/collections/rings/products/14kt-white-sapphire-ella-vie-ring) with a very thin band. I was charged $109 for that which I feel is a little high. I've heard that thin bands are harder to resize but that seems excessive. (I live in MA if that makes a difference.)
The other ring I asked them to glue in zirconia that had fallen out. It was a silver ring and was tarnished. When I came to pick it up, the lady at the counter said they "did their best" to remove the tarnish but it still looked very dark. When I got home, I used some Wright's silver cream on it and the tarnish came right off. That felt really unprofessional to me and seemed really odd given that it was silver which I thought would be a very easy metal to clean up.
My question is was I overcharged and do you think the service is subpar? Or are my expectations unrealistic? I also gave them a bracelet that I thought was silver but had rusted in parts. They told me they couldn't do anything to restore it because it was a base metal and not silver. Is that true that there's nothing to be done in that case?
Thanks in advance!

Life in the Matrix
You wake up to the blaring sound of your alarm clock, dragging yourself out of bed with heavy eyes. You reach for your phone, mindlessly scrolling through a feed of carefully crafted content. Next, you fill a glass with tap water, unaware of the hidden chemicals that slowly cloud your senses and keep you trapped in a haze. As you prepare a quick breakfast, following the same mundane routine, you barely register the taste of the processed foods. You're just going through the motions, a puppet on strings, following a script written by the system.
You step out, joining the masses on their daily commute—a sea of tired faces all headed to their respective cages. Listening to radio music that speaks of violence, drugs, and sex—a stark contrast to the life you wish you had. At work, it's the same old 9-5 grind, clocking in and out. Your cubicle feels like a prison cell, confined under fluorescent lights.
Lunch offers no escape, serving more processed foods and seed oils that leave you feeling heavy. As the day finally ends, you head home, only to be greeted by more traffic. You turn on the TV, seeking comfort in familiar stories.
As you lay your head down, a question lingers: "Is this real life?" You set your alarm, knowing tomorrow will be a repeat. Are we just following a script, actors in a play designed by unseen forces? It's a thought that keeps you awake, questioning your reality.
The Matrix: A System of Control
The Matrix is all around us, shaping our lives. The phone in your hand, the buildings, the ground—it all started as someone’s idea. We’re living in a world made for us, not by us. Everything, from the tech we use to the food we eat, is part of a big plan that keeps us in line.
We’re like actors, doing our parts on a stage we didn’t build. The Matrix is a web that’s been spun around us, controlling what we do, think, and see.
The air we breathe, the water we drink—it’s got stuff in it that keeps us calm and under control. Our clothes, our food—it’s all made to keep us the same, happy with just being okay. We’re stuck in a system that benefits from us not asking questions.
But who’s behind it all? Who made the Matrix and the rules? We need to ask these questions to really understand how we’re trapped. We’re just players in a game, and it’s time to change the game.
There’s a way out of this control and sameness. A path that leads to freedom and seeing things for what they really are. It starts with realizing what’s holding us back. We have to question everything because nothing is what it seems.
Just like in Plato’s story, we’ve been fooled by shadows. But there’s a real world out there, full of truth and light. We can break free and see things as they really are.
The Power Within: Escaping the Mind Matrix
The Matrix isn’t just outside; it’s inside us too. Our minds, once full of creativity and freedom, are now full of thoughts that trap us in our own world. By capturing everything in the world, we’ve created our own illusory world—a matrix within the matrix, a hologram where we’re trapped by our recurring thoughts and ingrained habits, repeating the same patterns endlessly.
But we’re not helpless. We have the power to break free. Meditation is the key. It enables us to go within and allow us to see past the illusions we’ve made for ourselves.
Through meditation, we find out who we really are. We break down the walls in our minds and free ourselves from our own thoughts and habits. We see that the real prison wasn’t the Matrix outside, but the one we built inside our heads. Meditation helps us step out of our own shadows and into the real world.
I know what it's like to be trapped in your own mind. Anxieties and worries clouded my vision, and my thoughts felt like dark clouds hovering over me. But then, I discovered meditation, and everything changed. I started to let go of the mental snapshots I had collected—thoughts, emotions, and habits that kept me trapped.
As I released these mental barriers, my mind began to clear. It was like lifting a fog, and the world around me came into focus. I realized that the true world, a world of Truth and beauty, had always been there, hidden by the matrix of my own making.
Meditation was my compass, guiding me back to myself and a reality unclouded by my own illusions. It wasn't an easy journey, but with each step, I felt lighter and more at peace. I uncovered a world that was always there, waiting for me to see beyond my own mental barriers.
Let's Come Out from the Matrix
It’s time to wake up. See the Matrix for what it is—a system that wants to keep us under control, both externally and internally. But remember, you have the power to break free.
Meditation can give you the strength you need. You’ll find a peaceful and clear world beyond the Matrix. It’s not easy, but the reward is a life of real freedom and finding out who you really are.
Are you ready to leave the Matrix and start a new life? The choice is yours.

Life in the Matrix
You wake up to the blaring sound of your alarm clock, dragging yourself out of bed with heavy eyes. You reach for your phone, mindlessly scrolling through a feed of carefully crafted content. Next, you fill a glass with tap water, unaware of the hidden chemicals that slowly cloud your senses and keep you trapped in a haze. As you prepare a quick breakfast, following the same mundane routine, you barely register the taste of the processed foods. You're just going through the motions, a puppet on strings, following a script written by the system.
You step out, joining the masses on their daily commute—a sea of tired faces all headed to their respective cages. Listening to radio music that speaks of violence, drugs, and sex—a stark contrast to the life you wish you had. At work, it's the same old 9-5 grind, clocking in and out. Your cubicle feels like a prison cell, confined under fluorescent lights.
Lunch offers no escape, serving more processed foods and seed oils that leave you feeling heavy. As the day finally ends, you head home, only to be greeted by more traffic. You turn on the TV, seeking comfort in familiar stories.
As you lay your head down, a question lingers: "Is this real life?" You set your alarm, knowing tomorrow will be a repeat. Are we just following a script, actors in a play designed by unseen forces? It's a thought that keeps you awake, questioning your reality.
The Matrix: A System of Control
The Matrix is all around us, shaping our lives. The phone in your hand, the buildings, the ground—it all started as someone’s idea. We’re living in a world made for us, not by us. Everything, from the tech we use to the food we eat, is part of a big plan that keeps us in line.
We’re like actors, doing our parts on a stage we didn’t build. The Matrix is a web that’s been spun around us, controlling what we do, think, and see.
The air we breathe, the water we drink—it’s got stuff in it that keeps us calm and under control. Our clothes, our food—it’s all made to keep us the same, happy with just being okay. We’re stuck in a system that benefits from us not asking questions.
But who’s behind it all? Who made the Matrix and the rules? We need to ask these questions to really understand how we’re trapped. We’re just players in a game, and it’s time to change the game.
There’s a way out of this control and sameness. A path that leads to freedom and seeing things for what they really are. It starts with realizing what’s holding us back. We have to question everything because nothing is what it seems.
Just like in Plato’s story, we’ve been fooled by shadows. But there’s a real world out there, full of truth and light. We can break free and see things as they really are.
The Power Within: Escaping the Mind Matrix
The Matrix isn’t just outside; it’s inside us too. Our minds, once full of creativity and freedom, are now full of thoughts that trap us in our own world. By capturing everything in the world, we’ve created our own illusory world—a matrix within the matrix, a hologram where we’re trapped by our recurring thoughts and ingrained habits, repeating the same patterns endlessly.
But we’re not helpless. We have the power to break free. Meditation is the key. It enables us to go within and allow us to see past the illusions we’ve made for ourselves.
Through meditation, we find out who we really are. We break down the walls in our minds and free ourselves from our own thoughts and habits. We see that the real prison wasn’t the Matrix outside, but the one we built inside our heads. Meditation helps us step out of our own shadows and into the real world.
I know what it's like to be trapped in your own mind. Anxieties and worries clouded my vision, and my thoughts felt like dark clouds hovering over me. But then, I discovered meditation, and everything changed. I started to let go of the mental snapshots I had collected—thoughts, emotions, and habits that kept me trapped.
As I released these mental barriers, my mind began to clear. It was like lifting a fog, and the world around me came into focus. I realized that the true world, a world of Truth and beauty, had always been there, hidden by the matrix of my own making.
Meditation was my compass, guiding me back to myself and a reality unclouded by my own illusions. It wasn't an easy journey, but with each step, I felt lighter and more at peace. I uncovered a world that was always there, waiting for me to see beyond my own mental barriers.
Let's Come Out from the Matrix
It’s time to wake up. See the Matrix for what it is—a system that wants to keep us under control, both externally and internally. But remember, you have the power to break free.
Meditation can give you the strength you need. You’ll find a peaceful and clear world beyond the Matrix. It’s not easy, but the reward is a life of real freedom and finding out who you really are.
Are you ready to leave the Matrix and start a new life? The choice is yours.
If you'd like to unplug, join me this World Meditation Day (5/21) to leave the Matrix behind.

Life in the Matrix
You wake up to the blaring sound of your alarm clock, dragging yourself out of bed with heavy eyes. You reach for your phone, mindlessly scrolling through a feed of carefully crafted content. Next, you fill a glass with tap water, unaware of the hidden chemicals that slowly cloud your senses and keep you trapped in a haze. As you prepare a quick breakfast, following the same mundane routine, you barely register the taste of the processed foods. You're just going through the motions, a puppet on strings, following a script written by the system.
You step out, joining the masses on their daily commute—a sea of tired faces all headed to their respective cages. Listening to radio music that speaks of violence, drugs, and sex—a stark contrast to the life you wish you had. At work, it's the same old 9-5 grind, clocking in and out. Your cubicle feels like a prison cell, confined under fluorescent lights.
Lunch offers no escape, serving more processed foods and seed oils that leave you feeling heavy. As the day finally ends, you head home, only to be greeted by more traffic. You turn on the TV, seeking comfort in familiar stories.
As you lay your head down, a question lingers: "Is this real life?" You set your alarm, knowing tomorrow will be a repeat. Are we just following a script, actors in a play designed by unseen forces? It's a thought that keeps you awake, questioning your reality.
The Matrix: A System of Control
The Matrix is all around us, shaping our lives. The phone in your hand, the buildings, the ground—it all started as someone’s idea. We’re living in a world made for us, not by us. Everything, from the tech we use to the food we eat, is part of a big plan that keeps us in line.
We’re like actors, doing our parts on a stage we didn’t build. The Matrix is a web that’s been spun around us, controlling what we do, think, and see.
The air we breathe, the water we drink—it’s got stuff in it that keeps us calm and under control. Our clothes, our food—it’s all made to keep us the same, happy with just being okay. We’re stuck in a system that benefits from us not asking questions.
But who’s behind it all? Who made the Matrix and the rules? We need to ask these questions to really understand how we’re trapped. We’re just players in a game, and it’s time to change the game.
There’s a way out of this control and sameness. A path that leads to freedom and seeing things for what they really are. It starts with realizing what’s holding us back. We have to question everything because nothing is what it seems.
Just like in Plato’s story, we’ve been fooled by shadows. But there’s a real world out there, full of truth and light. We can break free and see things as they really are.
The Power Within: Escaping the Mind Matrix
The Matrix isn’t just outside; it’s inside us too. Our minds, once full of creativity and freedom, are now full of thoughts that trap us in our own world. By capturing everything in the world, we’ve created our own illusory world—a matrix within the matrix, a hologram where we’re trapped by our recurring thoughts and ingrained habits, repeating the same patterns endlessly.
But we’re not helpless. We have the power to break free. Meditation is the key. It enables us to go within and allow us to see past the illusions we’ve made for ourselves.
Through meditation, we find out who we really are. We break down the walls in our minds and free ourselves from our own thoughts and habits. We see that the real prison wasn’t the Matrix outside, but the one we built inside our heads. Meditation helps us step out of our own shadows and into the real world.
I know what it's like to be trapped in your own mind. Anxieties and worries clouded my vision, and my thoughts felt like dark clouds hovering over me. But then, I discovered meditation, and everything changed. I started to let go of the mental snapshots I had collected—thoughts, emotions, and habits that kept me trapped.
As I released these mental barriers, my mind began to clear. It was like lifting a fog, and the world around me came into focus. I realized that the true world, a world of Truth and beauty, had always been there, hidden by the matrix of my own making.
Meditation was my compass, guiding me back to myself and a reality unclouded by my own illusions. It wasn't an easy journey, but with each step, I felt lighter and more at peace. I uncovered a world that was always there, waiting for me to see beyond my own mental barriers.
Let's Come Out from the Matrix
It’s time to wake up. See the Matrix for what it is—a system that wants to keep us under control, both externally and internally. But remember, you have the power to break free.
Meditation can give you the strength you need. You’ll find a peaceful and clear world beyond the Matrix. It’s not easy, but the reward is a life of real freedom and finding out who you really are.
Are you ready to leave the Matrix and start a new life? The choice is yours.
If you'd like to unplug, join me on World Meditation Day to leave the Matrix behind.

Hello friends!
As the title states, for those of us arriving to the farm on Tuesday we have exactly 25 days to bring it all together. What better way to celebrate 25 days away from being back home than with 25 tips for a great Roo. 2 years ago I did a daily series with 100 tips. Last year I did a daily series with 50 tips. This year it's cut and dry, one take, one day, top 25 tips from a Roo and festival vet. Let's do it.

1. Water- Drink it. A lot of it. All of it. Let it run down your chin you little water slut. Staying hydrated is the #1 way to have a great Roo and consequently the easiest way to end up in the med tent if you don't. There's water stations in the campgrounds and in Centeroo, use em. It's hot. Bring a hydropack, water bottle, or whatever kind of water container you prefer.
2. Beat the Heat- Or at least try. Bring a canopy for camp and some tapestries to hang around. Battery powered fans. Misting fans. Cooling towels. Clacking hand fans. An umbrella. An umbrella hat. Hang out under the trees, tents, signs, or any other thing that will provide some relief from the heat. Bring and USE sunscreen. It truly can't be expressed enough how hot Roo can be and trust me when I say getting a sunburn on Thursday or Friday can make Saturday and Sunday rough.

*PRO TIP- Bring a bucket or collapsible bin of some kind to put some cold cooler water in it for a foot bath. Your feet and your entire being will thank you.

1. Meet Your Neighbors- One of the things that makes Bonnaroo great is the sense of community that comes along with it. Whether it's passing each other on the way in and out of camp, the lazy morning hangs, catching some shows, the pregame beers, keeping an eye out for each other's camp, or sharing that one thing you forgot to bring; Befriending your neighbors can and will take your Roo experience to the next level.
   
2. Lights- All of the lights. Like Kanye said; flashlights, battery powered string lights, solar lights, lanterns, LEDs, nightlights, or something like that. We're camping in the middle of bumfuck nowhere middle Tennessee. Yes, they do provide some lighting in the campground but it's still dark. Keep a small flashlight in your bag, you'll need it.
   
3. Comfy Shoes- Comfy BROKEN IN shoes. Whatever is your comfiest footwear, use that. Imo at least, Bonnaroo is much less of a fashion show and is much more about being comfortable in the elements while adding in the 30-40-50 miles of walking, dancing, skipping, and frolicking you will do. Getting some insoles will also help your feet make it through.
   
4. Begin Physically Preparing Thyself- If you haven't already. Nobody needs to be in peak physical condition by any means, but doing some cardio, walking, a bike ride, etc. and getting out in the heat beforehand will go a long way when it comes to the marathon gauntlet that is Bonnaroo. Get a little uncomfortable before we get really uncomfortable in a few weeks.
   
5. First Aid kit, Butt wipes, Chafe cream, Baby Powder- A few of the most important personal things that will do wonders for that swamp ass and Roo Rash. Skip TP all together and just bring butt wipes, your butt and chafed thighs will thank you. They will also thank you when you apply that chafe cream and your legs are slip slidin' and glidin' all night long.
   
6. Make Campsite Noticeable- Lights, balloons, pinwheels, signs, wackly inflatable tube men, a blimp. Do something to make your campsite stand out a little bit when things get a bit weird and can't find your way back home.
   
7. Catch a Sunrise- Specifically a Pretty Lights one Saturday night into Sunday morning, but any sunrise is meaningful on the farm. One of the things that make Bonnaroo unique from other festivals is the fact that music of some kind is going until sunrise. This is no easy task, even for professionals, but the payoff at the end is worth every second of tiredness to get you there.
   

10.High Five Everyone- This one's big. High Fives have been a staple at Bonnaroo since 1842 when Colonel Mustard high fived Trey Anastacio's great great Uncle and the rest was history. High five everyone. Everyday. Anywhere. Anytime. There may or may not be a winding high five line in front of the arch this year, but that's no excuse to not throw a hand up and watch the magic happen. Not getting enough fives? It means you aren't giving enough. Dish em out like pizzas and hot cakes.

1. Prepare for All Types of Weather- Hot, cold, windy, rainy, snowy. Plan for it all regardless of what the forecast says. Tennessee is like Florida where the forecast has changed 14 times since I started writing this. Bring your swim trunks but also a hoodie and beanie. Bring a poncho if you're going to melt. Don't forget to stake down the tents and canopies. Prepare for it all.
   
2. Check out the Plazas- Plazas, which used to be "pods", are themed areas throughout the campgrounds that offer entertainment and programming of all different kinds. Each plaza contains bathrooms, wifi, staff, charging stations, and information that can be beneficial.
   
3. Bring Something To Sleep On- Air mattress, cot, inflatable couch, in the car; whatever it is make sure it's something somewhat comfortable to catch some precious Z's on. We only get a few hours of sleep while on the farm, make sure it's the most comfortable you can possibly get for maximum efficiency.
   
4. Patience is a Virtue- Whether it's in the car line, beer line, bathroom line, or any place that requires waiting; just be patient. Go with the flow. People are working their hardest to get you through whatever line it is, just enjoy the ride. Getting upset, frustrated, etc. doesn't do anybody any good when we're all trying to get to the same place. Just have some patience and trust me it will go a long way.
   
5. Bring Things to Trade & Give Away- This concept is not unique to Bonnaroo but some festivals in general; bring things to give away. Think small, inexpensive, yet meaningful in the right situations. Squishy animals, pogs, green army men, pokemon cards, hat clips, clothespins, marbles; the possibilities here are pretty endless. Having things to give away will just up your Roo experience that much more.
   
6. Keep Valuables locked in the Car- Even though Bonnaroo is by in large a safe place, any public event that draws 60K+ people also brings the bad apples. Anything over 20$ we lock in the car and out of sight and hide our keys at camp. Also please do not bring ANYTHING of substantial value in which you will be upset if it goes missing, broken, or lost. Don't bring grandmother's precious jewels with you. If it has value, lock it in your car.
   
7. Bring Cash- Yes Bonnaroo like most events is moving toward a cashless event, however having cash on you will alleviate some of the issues that go along with so called cashless. There will be things wandering through camp which only require cash, some vendors take cash, and having that peace of mind will frankly go a long way when a card simply won't do.
   
8. Pace Yourself- Bonnaroo is a marathon, not a sprint. Although I whole heartedly endorse full send Thursday, pacing yourself throughout the weekend will leave you some energy left for Fred Again Sunday night. Stay hydrated, take naps, and don't feel bad when you have to take a load off to catch your breath.
   
9. Live In the Moment- Be. Here. Now. Take it all in. Stay off your phone. Embrace the journey. Embrace the moment. Live it. Be it. Accept it. Enjoy it. Don't over plan and don't force it. Let it be. Bonnaroo only comes around once a year and it's in our best interest to make every second count. Keep your head up, eyes open, and enjoy every moment the farm gives us.
   
10. Foster the Bonnarovian Code.
    

a. Prepare Thyself
b. Play as a Team
c. Radiate Positivity
d. Respect the Farm
e. Don't be that Person
f. Stay True Roo
Embrace these basic yet powerful principles and you are on the right track to having a wonderful Bonnaroo experience. Not only do these principles apply to the farm, but they also translate well to our everyday lives.

1. Cooler Maintenance- Tried and true ways to keep your coolers cold as long as possible without spending a fortune on ice. FROZEN WATER BOTTLES. Probably the most beneficial festival hack there is. Layer the bottom of your coolers with frozen bottles and shove ice packs in there as well. Dry ice when used correctly will keep coolers cold for days. Keep coolers out of the sun and closed as much as possible during the day. Before packing coolers, bring them inside and throw some ice in them to cool them down. May the cold be with you, always.
   
2. Wear Whatever the Fuck you Want- Sorry for cussing. But seriously. Wear whatever feels right. Wear a costume. Wear something wild. Wear something basic af. Wear a wig. Wear that dumbass thing in the back of your closet that hasn't seen the light of day since 2004, let it out. Whatever you wear just make sure it's comfortable. And if you wear something that isn't comfortable, just know we appreciate you and the sacrifices you're making for the greater good.
   
3. Get Merch Early- The good stuff goes quick. The popular sizes go quick. Don't sleep on it. If there's something you see you want just get it and be done with it so there are no regrets later, not even one letter.
   
4. Camp Chairs, inflatable couches, Stools, Pussy Couches, Blankets- Basically just bring things to sit or relax on. Camp chairs, couches, inflatable unicorns, and stools for camp and a blanket for inside Centeroo. Blow up couches aren't technically allowed in the venue but neither are substances and glowsticks and there are certainly neither of those at Bonnaroo.
   
5. Battery stations, Power Banks, Solar Chargers- Bring whatever you need to keep your electronics charged without having to use the courtesy outlets. Charging things in the car is a move as well as a DC inverter which plugs into your car cigarette lighter. We only get a short amount of time on the farm, don't spend it teathered to an outlet. Bring the power.
   

Honorable Mention Tips

1. Check Camping supplies ahead of time.
2. Don't forget your ID, wristband, and parking pass. (This one is pretty important and should probably be higher up)

That's all I got for the time being. Anything I missed please feel free to add below. For all the first timers joining us this year I would just like to say welcome to the farm. Embrace and enjoy every second you are there. To all the vets coming back, can't wait to see you fuckers again real soon. We're almost there. Happy Bonnaroo Yall!

Previously
I could not tell you exactly how I failed my semester. Everything was foggy. One thing for sure, I recalled spending more time with Al than with my studies. With her, I discovered the ins and outs of Boston: its neighborhoods and surrounding towns. She would take me to different areas to countless parties, hosted by her friends. We would sing reggae together, dance , drink, smoke marijuana, a lot of marijuana, and, afterwards, would go to her place, where we would sleep together a lot like rabbits. The only time I ever set foot in my dorm room was near the end of the semester, where I came across a stack of urgent notes from my academic advisor. These notes pertained to my parents and, particularly, their demands that I should “call them at once!”
It was through my parents that I learned about my academic failure for the semester and how I failed: not attending a single class. Prior to calling, my plan was to keep quiet like I normally had done before and let them do all the talking. That was supposed to be the plan.
Upon dialing, my mother picked up the phone after the first tone and, without exchanging any pleasantries, proceeded to blast me with her sweet voice and biting sarcasms. I was the son “scamming them out of their hard earned money” and one who was doing something that I was “finally more than average at,” making them “shameful parents.” I expected all of this from her, but what caught me off guard was the raw anger in her voice. Still, I stayed silent and listened as usual.
My father, on the other hand, was far angrier and did not mince his words with sarcasms. After my mother had said her piece, he took the phone and cussed me all the names he knew under the sun, even cussing me in his mother’s tongue. His anger made his nasal voice even more pronounced, making it difficult for me to remain silent compared to my mother's words. It felt like each word was a punch to the ear through the phone. I fought to keep my composure, but frustration surged within me.
"Mary, I bet this whole thing is all over some stupid asshole girl." That blew me up. I took it as a direct insult to Al. He hadn't even met her, hadn't seen her warm smile or her inviting eyes. He hadn't experienced her nonjudgmental nature or known how easy she was to talk to. Yet, he felt he had the right to insult her.
“So what the fuck it is!” I remembered yelling over the phone. I remembered there was a brief, deafening silence after I spoke, so quiet that you could hear a pin drop. Mind you, at this point, I was no longer the same Howard that my parents were used to talking down to. They were exposed to a rude awakening. A different Howard who had long thick dreadlocks that stopped at his knees and who could look you directly in the eye and cussed you out like a seaman.
“Mister man. I want you to pack your things and take the next plane back home.” It was the clearest I ever heard his voice, without even a hint of nasalness. I could also hear his heavy breaths, like a silverback just before it was about to beat his chest and charge at you.
“Bite me.” I had answered him and hung up. That was the last time I talked to my parents. I had many regrets in life and this was among the top ones. Looking back now, I probably should not have done what I did. First off, I probably should have called them when I was off sound mind or sober. I also underestimated how cold and unforgiving my parents could be, and how far they would go to maintain their family's image. I had two younger brothers and a toddler age sister. When I did not take that next plane back home, my parents, as far as they were concerned, still had a legacy that they could build up and make their name proud, even after they left this world. I was the first child: the mistake and experiment that they could learn from when rearing up my siblings.
Not surprisingly, I was kicked out of MIT as my parents did not pay for my next semester’s schooling. I did not care at the time. At least, I had my Al and she was nice enough to offer rooming to my bicycle, suitcase and I. We were officially together under one roof. Only this was not to be permanent.
About a month after moving in with Al, we found ourselves in a situation where we couldn't afford the rent and had to move out. Al had lost her job a few weeks earlier because she showed up to it high, a decision I blamed myself for since I had encouraged us to attend a party the previous night.
Living with Al's friends was initially a relief, a temporary solution to our housing predicament. But as the days turned into weeks, we began to overstay our welcome. Our presence became a burden, straining the patience and resources of those free spirits who had graciously taken us in. Eventually, we found ourselves with no place to call home, facing the harsh reality of homelessness.
During this period, finding work proved to be a near impossible challenge. Despite my best efforts, no employer wanted to even touch me. It was then that I truly understood my immigration status on a student visa and the obstacles it presented to securing employment. Until then, I had never considered or entertained such thoughts, leaving them up to my parents.
The idea of marrying Al for a green card never even crossed my mind. I refused to burden her with my problems or pressure her into such a life-altering decision. One way or the other way, I was going to find a solution on my own.
Though it looked like a grim reality check, strangely enough, Al and I were the happiest when we were homelessness. Freed from the burdens of parental or societal expectations, we embraced our status as free birds in the city, viewing it as our own personal playground.
If there was no luck at the soup kitchens, we would scavenge food from trash bins by restaurants. Surprisingly, we often stumbled upon untouched treasures like whole pizzas, pieces of chicken wings, discarded birthday cakes (often anniversary cakes), pies, and many other items. People's wastefulness became a lifeline for us, and we were deeply thankful for it.
Beyond mere survival, we reveled in the adventure of exploring the city's hidden corners. From navigating the labyrinthine subway tracks to stumbling upon alleys adorned with vibrant street art to sneaking into buildings with magnificent views of the city’s skyline, every discovery fueled our sense of wonder and curiosity. And we certainly were not shy to fool around in all these places as no place in the city was safe from our escapades: not the museums and not even the stadium.
But even with all the craziness and unpredictability, the most important thing about being homeless was the bond we shared. I fondly recall the nights spent huddled together under the stars in quiet parks, wrapped in blankets and sharing our dreams. Al wanted to go back to school to pursue nursing, while I had ambitions of completing my engineering degree at a community college. With that qualification, I hoped to secure a well-paying job that could sponsor both of us, paving the way for us to settle in a cozy home in the suburbs. There, we could begin our journey of building a family together. Each time I shared my dreams with Al, her left blue moon eye seemed to radiate with an illuminating glow, serving as a source of hope and strengthening my determination to believe that anything was possible.
Eventually, I managed to secure employment the other way: under the table at a slaughterhouse. But even with a steady income, my wages were barely enough to cover our basic needs, let alone secure permanent housing. However, luck seemed to smile upon us in an unexpected way.
At the slaughterhouse, I crossed paths with a fellow countryman named Archie, who had faced similar challenges with work status. Our shared nationality sparked instant camaraderie, and Archie eagerly offered his assistance upon learning about our homelessness. He revealed that he had a friend at the Port of Boston who could help us find shelter in one of the abandoned shipping containers there.
Archie assured me that living in a shipping container wasn't as bad as it sounded, sharing his own experience of finding temporary refuge in one upon arriving in America. He explained that as the weather cooled with the onset of fall, we wouldn't have to endure the sweltering heat of summer. However, he advised us to prepare for the winter chill with plenty of blankets and, even better, a portable heater. Despite its unconventional nature, it was a far better option than braving the elements out on the streets.
As Archie led Al and I through the lively Port of Boston, I couldn't shake the feeling of gratitude for his unexpected generosity. Here was a man who did not know me from Adam and was offering to help me and my woman, with no payment or strings attached.
We soon arrived at a secluded corner, where Archie introduced us to his friend, JJ. JJ was a short, stocky man with large muscular arms, a stark contrast to Archie's tall and malnourished skinny frame. Despite their physical differences, JJ exuded friendliness and kindness, much like Archie. He welcomed Al and I very warmly. Hence the reason, I could never forgive myself for what I did to him. That was also one of my biggest life regrets.
With a nod from JJ, we followed him to an abandoned shipping container nestled away from prying eyes. It was a hidden gem, shielded from the outside world by stacks of cargo containers. JJ assured us that it was a safe haven, far from the scrutiny of port workers.
As we settled into our new home, JJ's kindness continued to shine through. He provided us with port safety jackets, ensuring we could blend in seamlessly with the workers. He even offered his assistance if we encountered any issues, emphasizing that he was always available at the main loading dock during his night shifts.
The shipping container began to feel more like home with each passing day. Thanks to Archie and JJ's assistance, we were able to transport an old mattress, dresser, and milk crates— repurposed as shelves— from various junk sites and donation bins using JJ's cargo van. Despite the simplicity of our accommodations, the mere presence of these familiar items filled us with tremendous joy as we finally had a place to call our home.
Al's creative touch transformed the interior, adorning it with artificial bouquets she had found at a dump site. The vibrant colors breathed life into our makeshift home, infusing it with warmth and charm.
As we settled into our newfound sanctuary, a wave of relief washed over us. For the first time in months, we felt a sense of stability and security. With our basic needs finally met, we could now turn our attention to our goals for the future.
Eager to continue my education, I made plans to dedicate myself to finishing my engineering degree once the upcoming winter months had passed. Little did I know at the time that my student visa had already been canceled, making this goal completely impossible. Being a youth and all its naivety.
However, I never got the chance to find out about my visa status or even make the attempt to finish my education. At the start of winter, Al went missing.
Next Part 4 Preview:
It was a wicked, cold-blooded anger that made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. I tried to release my hands from his shirt, but it was too late. He seized my wrists like a vise grip and, in one swift motion before I had time to react, picked me up, slamming me onto the concrete.
/The Tragic Tale of Howard. A West African 9-Part Series short story about loss, second chance, betrayal and personal demons. By West African writer Josephine Dean /