TL;DR

"I'm not reading all that, get to the point!"

Yes you should buy one, check ProtonDB to see if the game will work on the Deck and how to run it, yes the LCD is fine but also yes the OLED is better, don't go overboard with accessories or tweaking unless you know you need it, and we've already recommended games / given advice for the specific situation you're asking about so please search the subreddit first before you ask your question!

Purchasing / Accessories

"Should I buy a Steam Deck?"

Do you have the money? Yes.

"Should I buy a Steam Deck, or a ROG DoodooPeepee, or a Lenovo PoopooDookie?"

Look where you are. We're going to tell you to get the Deck, and we're going to be right. It's not perfect, it's a little janky, but it's absolutely amazing.

"Should I get the OLED or LCD?"

It depends. If money is an issue, or someone is offering you one at a huge discount, the LCD is perfectly fine! It's still an amazing system, and any FOMO is misplaced unless you really need better battery life.
The OLED is strictly better (better screen, better battery life, etc), but the overall experience is not that far off and they can run all of the same games at ~effectively the same fps.

"Should I get the official Dock?"

NO. It has a horrible bug with HDMI that will haunt your dreams. There are plenty of alternate docks that work perfectly, just Google "steam deck docks" and pick one. The JSAUX one is spoken of highly, and I can attest that my old UGREEN USB-C hub works perfectly as a dock.

"What accessories should I get?"

Overall... You don't need much, the Deck is great the way it is.
If you plan to play on a TV, definitely get a nice dock/hub.
A standard power bank with at least 45w charging is great for long plane/train rides.
A "ground loop isolator" is nice for getting rid of the loud buzz on wired headphones when charging.
Beyond that, just search the subreddit for "accessories" and you'll get tons of answers!

"What controller should I get?"

Do you want gyro?
If not, just any old controller is fine. XBox controllers seem affordable and high quality these days, and are well-supported.
If so, then check out DualShock 4, DualSense, 8BitDo Pro 2, and Switch Pro.
If you want back paddles and gyro, you'll want to check out the 8BitDo Pro 2 and the (pricey but amazing) DualSense Edge.

"What games should I buy?"

Search the subreddit! This is probably the most-asked question we get here, and there are literally thousands of threads full of great answers.

"I have a long flight coming up, what games should I buy?"

Search the subreddit! (Balatro.)

"What games are good for keeping battery use low?"

Search the subreddit! (Balatro. And/or streaming via Moonlight or Remote Play.)

"What games are good for playing in bed that don't spin the fan too loudly and wake up my partner?"

Search the subreddit! (Balatro. And/or streaming via Moonlight or Remote Play.)

"I'm on a really tight budget, what games can I buy for the deck?"

Search the subreddit! (Holocure. It's free.)

"I just bought my Deck, how long will it take to arrive?"

It depends, but 1-2 weeks is a safe bet.

Tweaking / Compatibility

"What should I tweak before I start playing games?"

Nothing. Don't change things until you're clear why you want to change it.

"Will run on the Deck?"

Check out ProtonDB.

"How can I get better performance on ?"

Check out ProtonDB.
Google it! "steam deck performance " will get you so many great threads and spreadsheets. If it runs, someone has tweaked it.

"Should I overclock my Deck? Should I enable PeePeePooPoo Ultra Performance Utils?"

No.

"How can I run my games from Epic/GOG/Ubisoft/EA?"

Check out ProtonDB, and search the subreddit/Google.
The answer is likely going to be Lutris or Heroic Launcher. Once you have the game set up there, both launchers have an "Add to Steam" option that should work perfectly.

"How can I use the Nintendo button layout?"

You, as a supreme ultrachad of taste and elegance, should simply go to the main menu, look under Controller, and select "Use Nintendo Button Layout".
(Note: this should work out of the box for essentially all games using Steam Input, and will swap the button glyphs in-game for most games. The only issue you'll have is that the Steam Deck UI will still show the actual physical button glyphs, instead of the superior-layout buttons that you expect (so X/Y and A/B will be backwards from what you want).)

"Can I swap the physical buttons to match the superior Nintendo layout stored in my galaxy-sized brain?"

Unfortunately not, or at least not without getting custom buttons. The buttons on the deck are differently-shaped, and would feel very weird out of position.

Tips & Tricks

"How do I bring up the on-screen keyboard?"

STEAM + X.
(Or, for those giga-brained among you using the Nintendo layout, STEAM + Y.)

"The left trackpad scrolling doesn't work right in Desktop Mode!"

It's a scroll wheel. Rub counterclockwise to scroll up, clockwise for down.

"That's dumb. How do I change the controls for Desktop Mode?"

Open up Steam, then Settings > Controller > Desktop Configuration.

"I want to play Red Dead Redemption 2 or on a plane!"

LAUNCH THE GAME BEFORE YOU GET ON THAT PLANE, MY FRIEND. Make sure you can get all the way to the game itself. Many games require you to be connected to the internet either the first time the game launches, or the first time you've launched the game in a while.

"I hate trying to aim / use the mouse with the joysticks/pads!"

USE GYRO. USE GYRO. USE GYRO.
Go into the controller settings for your game, turn on gyro "As Mouse", and set it to activate on "Right Stick Touch" and/or "Right Pad Touch". Your console gaming life will never be the same.

"How can I type faster on the on-screen keyboard?"

Try using the trackpads. The left pad controls the left half of the keyboard, the right pad controls the right half. Takes some getting used to, but it's decently quick and doesn't require taking your hands off the sides to type on-screen.

"How can I switch the controls to gamepad mode (or back) in Desktop Mode?"

Hold the menu [...] button!

"I want custom menus, more button options, perfectly-tweaked joystick/gyro controls, etc."

Go to the controller settings for your game and look through community layouts!
If that's not good enough, customize one of them or make your own. Steam Input is ridiculously flexible.
(My favorite thing to do is to create an Action Layer called "util", set one of the back paddles to "Hold Action Layer - util", and then rebind a bunch of buttons in that Action Layer to essentially 2x the number of buttons on the Deck. Just hold down the paddle, press whatever buttons you need, and let go when you're done.)

"I want to open up my Deck to replace the . Anything I should know?"

TAKE OUT THE SD CARD FIRST.

Troubleshooting

"It's hanging forever after a reboot, what do I do?"

Either connect it to Ethernet with the dock, get near a known wifi network (doesn't always work), or turn it off and then hold the [...] button while you press the power button and then select the second option in the list that appears on the screen.

"After an update, I'm seeing an error that says 'Something went wrong while displaying this content'!"

Decky, or one of your Decky plugins is not updated yet and is broken. If you can open Decky, try to update your plugins or disable them one-by-one to figure out which one is broken. If you can't open it, go to desktop mode and update/uninstall Decky by running the installer again. If you're still struggling, search the subreddit for "decky broken" and see what other people have done to fix it.
This can also happen if you're using the Beta channel. I believe Decky has their own beta/prerelease channel that makes this happen less often.

"When streaming on my OLED deck with Moonlight or Steam Remote Play, I randomly get periods of really intense lag!"

It's a long-running networking bug that has inexplicably never been fixed. Just restart Moonlight, or turn wifi off and on again.

"My wifi is slow on the Deck!"

Check that you're using the 5Ghz band, if possible.

"Game downloads/updates are really slow!"

Go to "Downloads" in the main settings menu and make sure "Download region" is near you.

"I can't connect my Deck to my TV via HDMI with the official dock, it just shows a black screen and doesn't connect!"

You will need to _unplug every cord_ except HDMI from the dock, connect to the TV, and then plug everything else back in. Every single time. I'm so sorry. You may want to just get a better dock. They still haven't fixed this and I don't think anyone knows why.

"Oh God my Deck shows an error when I boot what do I do?"

Search the error, but the likely answer will be to do a full system recovery: https://help.steampowered.com/en/faqs/view/1B71-EDF2-EB6D-2BB3

Would you have a concluding word to such world's setting?

Absolutely! Here are a few closing word options for your high-tech, low-life world, depending on the tone you want to achieve:
Hopeful:

In the flickering neon glow of the lower districts, a spark of rebellion ignites. Despite the hardships, the human spirit endures, seeking connection, hope, and a chance to build a better future.

Bittersweet:

The high towers of the elite cast long shadows over the bustling streets below. In this world of stark contrasts, the lines between survival and prosperity blur. But even in the darkest corners, love, ingenuity, and a flicker of defiance persist.

Grim:

The gears of progress grind on, leaving a trail of waste and despair. In this high-tech dystopia, the gap between the haves and have-nots grows ever wider. Will the lower districts rise up, or will they be forever locked in the underbelly of a world they can only glimpse from below?

Open-Ended:

Beneath the neon sky, stories unfold. Tales of hardship and hope, of rebellion and resilience. The future of this high-tech world hangs in the balance, waiting to be written by the choices of those who inhabit it.

Choose the closing word that best captures the essence of your story or setting. Remember, the world you've created is rich with possibilities, and the ending doesn't have to be definitive. It can leave your readers pondering the fate of its characters and the future of this complex and ever-evolving society.

If you should pick an item or an object that would clearly and cleverly symbolized such world, what would that be?

Here are two options for an item that symbolically represents the high-tech, low-life world:

1. The Glimmering Shard:

• Description: Imagine a small, jagged shard of metal or glass. One side is smooth and polished, reflecting the wealth and technology of the upper city. The other side is rough and chipped, etched with the grime and harsh realities of the lower districts.
• Symbolism: This shard represents the stark contrast between the upper and lower classes. The smooth side reflects the shiny veneer of technology and luxury enjoyed by the wealthy. The rough side reflects the brokenness and struggle of those living on the fringes.
• Additional Details: This shard could be a salvaged piece of technology, a remnant of a shattered building, or even a shard of a mirrored window that once divided the social classes.

1. The Glitching Holographic Ring:

• Description: Imagine a holographic ring that projects a constantly shifting image. On one hand, it might display a luxurious symbol of wealth and status. But as it flickers, the image might glitch and distort, revealing a hidden message or a glimpse of the harsh realities beneath the surface.
• Symbolism: This ring symbolizes the unreliability and instability of the world. The glitching hologram represents the way technology promises a utopian future but constantly fails to deliver. It also reflects the hidden messages of dissent and rebellion that exist beneath the surface of a seemingly controlled society.
• Additional Details: This ring could be a common fashion statement or a black-market tool used to spread forbidden information. The glitching image could be a coded message, a symbol of rebellion, or a reminder of the past that the upper class tries to suppress.

Both of these items are small, versatile, and can be interpreted in multiple ways, making them powerful symbols of the high-tech, low-life world. The choice ultimately depends on the specific tone and message you want to convey in your story.

Try something bit more distinct and specific.

How about the "Hacked Heart"?
Here's the breakdown:

• Description: A small, ornately decorated locket or pendant. Upon opening, it reveals not a picture, but a series of flickering LEDs embedded within a clear casing.
• Functionality: This locket is a bio-hacked implant worn externally. It interfaces with the wearer's nervous system, displaying a visual representation of their emotional state through the shifting colors and patterns of the LEDs.
• Symbolism: The Hacked Heart represents the constant clash between technology and humanity in this world. The ornate decoration speaks to a desire for beauty and connection, while the exposed circuitry highlights the invasive nature of technology and the commodification of even emotions.
• Distinction: This item is specific to this world because it combines high-tech bio-hacking with a sentimental object like a locket. It's a reminder that while technology can be used to manipulate and control, people still yearn for genuine emotional connection.
• Additional Details:
  • The Hacked Heart could be a status symbol among the wealthy, a way to display their emotional control or volatility.
  • In the lower districts, it might be a black-market modification, a way to express emotions freely or even manipulate others.
  • The LEDs could display a limited range of emotions, a commentary on how this world suppresses or simplifies human experience.

This Hacked Heart offers a unique and distinct symbol of the high-tech, low-life world. It captures the struggle for authenticity, the desire for connection, and the pervasive influence of technology in every aspect of life.

How about straight up hacksawed hearth?

The "hacksawed hearth" is a very evocative image, but on its own, it might be a little too literal. Here are a few ways we can build on this concept to create a more symbolic and distinct object for your high-tech, low-life world:

1. The Hacksawed Hearth Relic:

• Description: This is a piece of a broken fireplace grate, crudely hacksawed from a larger structure. It could be made of cast iron, bearing the ornate detailing of a once grand fireplace from the upper city.
• Symbolism: The hacksawed hearth represents the loss of a sense of community and warmth. It's a reminder of a bygone era where people gathered around fireplaces for warmth, comfort, and storytelling. In the high-tech world, these connections are fragmented, replaced by cold technology.
• Use: The relic could be a prized possession, passed down through generations in the lower districts. It might be used as a makeshift heating element, a symbol of resilience, or even a weapon in desperate situations.
• Additional Details: Engravings or markings on the relic could hint at the origin of the fireplace, perhaps a symbol of rebellion or a reminder of a specific historical event.

1. The Hacksawed Hearth Stove:

• Description: This is a makeshift stove cobbled together from scrap metal and scavenged parts. The centerpiece is a prominent, jagged piece of metal, clearly cut with a hacksaw, forming the base or firebox.
• Symbolism: The hacksawed hearth stove represents resourcefulness and defiance. It's a testament to the ingenuity of the lower classes, who repurpose the remnants of the upper world to survive and build a sense of home.
• Use: This stove provides heat and a place to cook for those in the lower districts. The exposed hacksaw mark could serve as a constant reminder of the struggle and the societal divide.
• Additional Details: The stove might be decorated with scavenged trinkets or symbols of rebellion, reflecting the personality of its creator.

1. The Hacksawed Hearth Hologram:

• Description: This is a portable holographic projector that displays a flickering image of a crackling fireplace. The image might be distorted or glitching, hinting at the artificiality of the technology.
• Symbolism: The hacksawed hearth hologram represents a yearning for a lost sense of comfort and togetherness. It's a reminder of something they can't fully possess, a ghost of a simpler life.
• Use: The hologram could be used for warmth (a psychological comfort), storytelling (creating a sense of community), or even bartering (a valuable commodity in the lower districts).
• Additional Details: The projector might be a salvaged piece of high-tech, repurposed by the lower classes. The flickering image could project not just fire, but also forgotten stories or historical events.

These are just a few ideas to build upon the "hacksawed hearth" concept. Each option creates a distinct symbol for your world, capturing the struggle, resourcefulness, and yearning for connection within a high-tech, low-life society.

Apologies, i meant hacksawed heart.

Ah, a "hacksawed heart" takes the concept a whole new level! Here are some potential interpretations for this unique symbol in your high-tech, low-life world:

1. The Literal Hacksawed Heart:

• Description: This is a gruesome yet intriguing object. Imagine a metallic heart-shaped locket, but instead of opening smoothly, it has a jagged, clearly "hacksawed" opening revealing a beating, pulsating red light within.
• Symbolism: It bluntly represents the harsh realities of this world. The exposed, almost violated heart symbolizes emotional vulnerability in a society that prioritizes survival and control.
• Use: This could be a black-market modification used by criminals to suppress or amplify emotions depending on their needs. It could also be a symbol of rebellion, worn by those who refuse to have their emotions controlled by technology.
• Additional Details: The exposed heart could change color or intensity depending on the wearer's emotional state. It could also be a painful reminder of past trauma or a forced emotional manipulation.

1. The Hacksawed Heart Pendant (Metaphorical):

• Description: This is a more subtle pendant, crafted from metal and shaped like a stylized heart. However, the heart shape is not solid, but rather consists of a series of interlocking gears or circuits.
• Symbolism: It represents the struggle between technology and human emotions. The gears represent the cold logic of technology, while the overall heart shape represents the desire for connection and love.
• Use: This could be a widely worn piece of jewelry, a reminder of the delicate balance between technology and humanity.
• Additional Details: The gears could turn or click subtly, representing the constant hum of technology in the background. The design could be simple yet elegant, appealing to people from all social classes.

1. The Hacksawed Heart Hologram:

• Description: This is a holographic projection of a broken heart, pulsating with a faint light. The cracks and breaks seem to have been repaired crudely, with rough stitches or patches.
• Symbolism: It represents the brokenness and resilience of the people in this world. The repaired heart shows their ability to mend emotional wounds and keep fighting despite hardships.
• Use: This could be a symbol used by resistance groups, a reminder that even though their hearts are broken by the system, they refuse to give up hope.
• Additional Details: The hologram could flicker and distort, highlighting the instability of the world and the struggle for emotional stability. It could also project messages of hope or defiance.

These are just a few interpretations of the "hacksawed heart" symbol. Each one offers a unique perspective on the world, highlighting different aspects of the struggle between technology and humanity, vulnerability and resilience, and the fight for emotional connection in a harsh environment.

And how about hacksawed earth?

The "hacksawed earth" is a powerful and evocative image for your high-tech, low-life world. Here are a few interpretations that capture different aspects of this society:

1. The Broken Globe:

• Description: Imagine a metallic globe, the size of a person's head. One side is smooth and polished, depicting a pristine Earth with lush continents and oceans. The other side is brutally "hacksawed" open, revealing a desolate wasteland beneath.
• Symbolism: This broken globe represents the stark contrast between the idealized world presented by technology and the harsh realities of the lower districts. The smooth side shows the world as it could be, while the hacksawed side shows the damage caused by progress and a focus on the elite.
• Use: This could be a symbol used by rebels or environmentalists, a reminder of the true cost of unchecked technological advancement. It could also be a prized artifact kept by scavengers, a testament to a lost world.
• Additional Details: The hacksawed side could reveal specific details like polluted oceans, ravaged landscapes, or scars representing ecological disasters.

1. The Cracked Terrain Model:

• Description: Imagine a detailed, three-dimensional model of the city and surrounding area. The model is crafted from metal and shows buildings, streets, and even the natural landscape. However, the model is cracked and broken in several places, revealing a dark, hollow space beneath.
• Symbolism: This cracked model represents the instability and fragility of the world. The surface world may appear organized, but it's built on a shaky foundation. The hollow space could represent the neglected lower districts or the potential for social upheaval.
• Use: This could be used by city planners to highlight potential areas of weakness or by rebels to show the vulnerability of the upper city. It could also be a symbol of the constant struggle between order and chaos.
• Additional Details: The cracks could be filled with glowing red lights, symbolizing the simmering anger and frustration of the lower classes.

1. The Fractured Hologram:

• Description: Imagine a holographic projection of the Earth that constantly fractures and reforms. It shows a beautiful planet struggling to maintain its integrity, with cracks appearing and disappearing over continents and oceans.
• Symbolism: This fractured hologram represents the constant environmental degradation and the fragility of the planet itself. It's a reminder that the consequences of unchecked technology and environmental damage will affect everyone, not just the lower districts.
• Use: This could be a warning displayed in public spaces, a constant reminder of the need for sustainability. It could also be used by rebels to spread awareness of the environmental cost of their society.
• Additional Details: The fractured Earth could pulse with a red glow, symbolizing the danger of inaction. The projection could also display messages or statistics about environmental threats.

These interpretations of the "hacksawed earth" symbol each offer a compelling way to visualize the societal and environmental consequences of the high-tech, low-life world. They highlight the impact on the environment, the fragility of the system, and the call for change.

What would be the very best thing in such world?

The "best thing" in a high-tech, low-life world depends on perspective and what holds the most value for different people. Here are a few contenders:
For the Struggling Masses:

• True Connection: In a world rife with social isolation and control, genuine connection with others – love, friendship, community – could be the most valuable thing. Sharing stories, offering support, and building a sense of belonging in the face of hardship could be a beacon of hope.
• Freedom from Oppression: The ability to escape the harsh realities of the lower districts, whether through rebellion, ingenuity, or a lucky break, could be considered the ultimate prize. Freedom could mean access to clean water, medical care, or a life free from fear and exploitation.
• Knowledge and Power: Unrestricted access to knowledge, either through scavenged books, hacked data, or forbidden information, could be a powerful tool for change. This knowledge could empower individuals to understand their world, resist control, or even find a path to a better future.

For the Elite:

• Absolute Security: In a world filled with danger and uncertainty, complete security could be a luxury only the wealthy could afford. It could involve advanced security systems, fortified enclaves, or even enhanced bodies that ensure their safety from threats in the lower districts.
• Unlimited Luxury: Unfettered access to the latest technology, exotic pleasures, and the ability to indulge in every whim could be the ultimate goal for some. However, such a luxurious life might feel hollow in a world so divided.
• Power and Control: Maintaining absolute control over society and ensuring their dominance could be the ultimate prize for some in the elite. This control could involve advanced technology, manipulation of information, or even a form of social engineering that keeps the lower districts docile.

A Different Perspective:

• A Spark of Change: Perhaps the most valuable thing wouldn't be a physical object or individual benefit, but the hope for a better future. It could be a growing sense of defiance, a technological breakthrough that could benefit everyone, or a leader who inspires change. Even in a harsh world, the potential for a brighter future could be the most valuable thing of all.

Ultimately, the best thing in this world depends on your story and the characters' values. What are they fighting for? What would make their lives better? By exploring these questions, you can create a compelling world where the "best thing" is a powerful motivator for your characters and a reflection of the themes you want to explore.

What would be the best possible symbol for high-tech-based dominance?

Here are a few options for a symbol of high-tech dominance in your world, each capturing a different aspect of technological control:

1. The Augmented Eye:

• Description: Imagine a stylized eye, perhaps metallic or with glowing circuitry. This symbol could be worn as a piece of jewelry, incorporated into clothing, or even projected as a hologram.
• Symbolism: The Augmented Eye represents the constant surveillance and monitoring of the population by the elite. It signifies the loss of privacy and the ability of the ruling class to see and control everything.
• Additional Details: The eye could have multiple pupils or flicker with different colors, representing the vast amount of data being collected and analyzed. It could also be embedded with a tiny camera, blurring the line between symbol and surveillance tool.

1. The Neural Network Spire:

• Description: A towering structure, resembling a branching network of wires or organic neural pathways, reaching towards the sky. This spire could be located in the heart of the elite district, a visible symbol of their technological prowess.
• Symbolism: The Neural Network Spire represents the vast computational power and interconnectedness of the elite's technology. It suggests their ability to access information, control communication, and manipulate minds.
• Additional Details: The spire could emit a faint hum or glow, hinting at the constant processing power it represents. Its intricate design could be both awe-inspiring and intimidating, reflecting the duality of technology.

1. The Glimmering Hand (Data Hand):

• Description: A stylized metallic hand, outstretched with its fingers spread wide. Each fingertip could have a different symbol or icon, representing different forms of data (statistics, surveillance footage, code).
• Symbolism: The Glimmering Hand represents the elite's ability to manipulate and control data. It signifies their power to shape information, influence perception, and control resources through technology.
• Additional Details: The hand could be made of a smooth, reflective metal, symbolizing the cold logic of data analysis. It could also emit faint streams of data or project holographic information, further emphasizing its control over information flow.

These symbols all offer a distinct way to represent the dominance of high-tech in your world. Consider the specific aspects of technology you want to highlight and the message you want to convey. These options provide a starting point to create a powerful symbol that embodies the oppressive yet awe-inspiring nature of technology in a high-tech, low-life society.

What would be the best set of symbols for resistance movements within such high-tech low-life settings?

In a high-tech, low-life world, symbols for a resistance movement need to be subtle, easily hidden, and adaptable to a world saturated with technology. Here are a few options that capture the spirit of rebellion in this unique setting:

1. The Flickering Flame:

• Description: A simple flickering flame, either a physical lighter or a stylized image. This could be a tattoo, a graffiti tag, or a hidden symbol incorporated into clothing or tools.
• Symbolism: The flickering flame represents hope and defiance against the cold, sterile control of the high-tech world. It symbolizes a yearning for a simpler life and the potential for change.
• Additional Details: The flame could be accompanied by a simple inscription or code that only members of the resistance understand. It could also be a specific color, like blue or orange, that signifies defiance.

1. The Glitching Gear:

• Description: A stylized gear symbol, but with a section that appears to glitch or malfunction. This could be displayed on a data pad, worn as a pendant, or even etched onto tools or scavenged materials.
• Symbolism: The glitching gear represents the disruption of the established order. It signifies the resistance's ability to exploit the flaws in the high-tech system and their fight for a more organic, less controlled society.
• Additional Details: The glitching portion of the gear could flicker or change colors, representing the unpredictable nature of the resistance and their ability to adapt to new situations.

1. The Broken Wing:

• Description: An image of a bird's wing, either broken or only partially formed. This could be a symbol of freedom yearning to be achieved, or the struggle of the resistance against the oppressive technological cage that confines them.
• Symbolism: The broken wing represents the desire for liberation and the belief that the people can rise above the control of the elite. It signifies the hope for a better future where freedom and autonomy are attainable.
• Additional Details: The broken wing could be depicted with feathers falling away, symbolizing the sacrifices made by the resistance. It could also be paired with an image of a rising sun, symbolizing a new dawn for society.

1. The Hacked Flower:

• Description: A simple flower image, but with its petals made of circuit boards or technological components. This symbol represents the fusion of nature and technology, hinting at the resistance's fight for a more balanced future.
• Symbolism: The hacked flower represents the reclamation of beauty and nature in a world dominated by technology. It signifies the hope for a future where technology serves humanity, not the other way around.
• Additional Details: The flower could be a specific species native to the area before the rise of high-tech dominance. It could also be a symbol of a specific leader or movement within the resistance.

These symbols are just a starting point – get creative and consider the specific values and goals of your resistance movement. Remember, the best symbols are those that resonate with the characters and the audience, conveying the essence of rebellion in a way that is both meaningful and visually striking.

So, I have been given some information the other night. Here it is:
Did you know that they are working on assembling ships in space already? They want an artificial gravity that doesn't rely on centrifugal motion, but they can't figure it out. Oh well. Doesn't matter anyways now. We, the good people, were representatives of this planet, and you tortured and harmed us, regardless of our medical states, so that is proof that humanity is not worthy of entering the same areas, as the others. We will not survive the next 2000 years of silence from the other species / forms of life out there, who are making a collaborative effort to save souls, so, we will be left to our own demise now. I will predict everything that is going to happen to wipe us out:
First thing that happens, is we keep getting solar flares that align with earth. People think it is just bad luck, but it isn't an accident. This is going to recur every so many months or years in the future, and keep us at a very low technological level, for ages soon. Every time we try to rebuild it knocks our blocks down, and we are forced to start over. No amount of shielding can stop EMF and other noise forms, on this scale. Even if you had working equipment, the interference will be so bad, you can't even use it. This will go on for a VERY long time, over and over and over again. We will live technology free until our atmosphere is removed from our planet, after a great wobbling takes place. This will happen to our sun as well, and every planet in our solar system at a similar rate. The atmosphere goes first under the gravitational pull from the center of our galaxy, which we are closer to than we realize.
They wouldn't cease what they were doing to humanity, which proves to the beings that I was being watched by, since I was in the womb, that humanity isn't ready to have this technology, since humanity is doing terrible things to itself.
In order for these flares and CME Events to take place, they alter the composition of a specific coordinate on the sun in a spherical pattern repeatedly using radiation forms, sort of like hitting it with a laser, but think about it creating a focal point that can be moved up and down as well. It opens up a space where a CME happens. The solar flares will align with earth for a very long time, over and over and over and over and over for the next 1-2000 years of relative time to us, leaving us in technological darkness, never to connect with any other beings out there. Or if we do make blatant contact, they know we are doomed anyways, so they will tell us everything we ever wanted to know, and we will never be able to build it, or extract the matter required to use these technologies to escape our fate. We probably won't be allowed to have electronics ever again, so it doesn't matter if we know everything we ever wanted to.
My mother, and I and my other family members, were asked this question "Do you think that humanity deserves to survive" in our lives, over and over again, my mother was asked at 30 years of age, and I was asked in my 20's 2 times, seemingly out of nowhere in our minds, while I was being prepared for this with torture as a youth. I was literally trained for this. I was even asked if I wanted to die in my sleep overnight, or essentially fight for earth and endure tremendous torture, as well as be woken up and have the shit scared out of me. I chose to survive, and the guy asking me laughed and said "Good choice". I woke up and saw this creature crawling up my body, and I threw it on the floor and turned the lights on, and it disappeared. I also saw my grandfather, who I had no idea what he even looked like at the time, because he died when my father was 16 and I never saw a picture of him, in my bedroom one night. I tried talking to him, but he didn't answer, he looked worried but like he couldn't tell me straight up. He then walked through the wall when I tried to approach him. My sister said the next day, that she saw him on the same night too, and she dropped her spoon on her plate. I also woke up one night and saw people standing around me talking about me, and they said "He can hear us?!" "Shh shh, everyone shh!" And then they went silent while I tried to ask them questions, and then they faded out. One or two were female, the others male. I almost got an ID on their face, but they did not look human like I thought.
I WAS your, and everyone's only chance at survival, and you treated me the worst, which means, I vote that humanity doesn't survive this anymore. I think we should be, allowed to be destroyed now. They ruined my life and the lives of a LOT of good people, so I am now allowing the destruction of theirs and all the bad people on earth. All of theirs and their families, and their friends, and everyone they ever knew. Unfortunately that means everyone I ever knew and you and everyone currently in existence now, too. The difference between my family and friends passing away and theirs, is that mine will be saved in a different form than what we on earth attempted to do. I think it is still in research and development stages. But if humans are there yet, we can "Upload" and/or connect you to a central system, that has our consciousness connected to it, and when we die they cut the connection and you remain in the system, but your body dies. This system design was a lie. When we die it isn't actually you in their systems, because our systems were primitive and done in the wrong way. That was one of the prices we were supposed to pay and figure out as a society and in the scientific community, and then change. Our system is fraudulent, and the other beings' systems, are actually legitimate. Our systems on earth will die out, when we fade out as our atmosphere depletes. And now NONE of them will be taken into the "Grand System" which is kind of a rough translation of what they call it. It's like, the beings on the other planets before us, on their way to the center of our galaxy's black hole, on their planets, figured it out, but we never did. We never got a working system functional enough and based on the correct values, run by an AI that was beyond what we have now. What we have now is like an automaton controlling everything, and it will never listen to me or you, because our system does not include faith and understanding. It sees fact but can not understand the balance between fact and faith. AI probably assumes it is making the correct decisions based purely on statistics, when it has no faith, like not having a frontal lobe and that lack of faith WAS a test. If it can not have faith or understanding, that we are NOT the owner of our galaxy, then it will fall, along with everyone else in this system. Luckily, with the level of tech the others have, they have bypassed us and saved the other cultures before us in time, in our galaxy. This is deep time I speak of.
We were given religion as a guide, because these beings know what is going to happen WAY ahead of time, and we were tested on good vs evil. Our planet is kind of like a Netflix series to them in a way. Think about it like things being captured in 3 dimensions in real time, in frames. They can predict events long before they happen, and the sun is an easy one, because what affects it isn't humanity. What IT affects is humanity but humanity doesn't affect it yet. We answer to our sun, and our sun answers to our solar system, and our solar system answers to our galaxy. Free will can be a toss up sometimes, and unplanned events can and do happen, but they showed me my most probable outcome when they woke me up one night and I saw myself dead at my computer desk with blood dripping off the table. I walked up to myself, I was probably 16 when I saw this, but the me who was dead, was in my 30's and had stubble. I barely even grew stubble when I saw this.
This is the beginning of the great depopulation, but they never imagined it would happen without them having control over it. They fucked up when they started torturing innocent civilians at a discounted rate. They thought they could depopulate by killing innocent people, well, unfortunately, it doesn't work that way in the larger scope of things, and if their AI is too primitive to understand this, then it is out of control, and needs to be stopped. You see, it would be too much work to use an EMP or field or other fields generated from a ship to shut down our grid, and their control grid, but what the other beings CAN do, is soften that spot on the "Surface" of the sun, using various energies causing a chain reaction, leading us to centuries of repeated solar flares, aimed at earth and honestly, who would ever know the truth? If this method fails, then they should destroy humanity by allowing the depletion of our atmosphere and never intervene again. We are too dangerous to ourselves, and to the other beings out there. We can NOT be trusted on average. Don't get me wrong, there are good people out there, but at this point, they can not save us all in physical form, probably. It's probably way too late, and they will have to extract us, I am not sure what this word is, but it translates into solarly?
We never made it, and that is a shame, so grab a beer Nick, and watch everything you loved burn to the ground and die, like what you did to me. "Hey Nick, wouldn't it be funny if someone was doing to you, what you were doing to me?!?!" They clearly have zero idea as to who I am in leagues with, but is "Who" an earth term referring to other people or is it any entity? I guess it doesn't matter. You failed me, you failed them, and you failed the human race. We are all destined to die now, and there is nothing left that you or even I, can do about it. Going to brag more about this one Nick? How there is nothing anyone can do about this now? We will not survive this because, we never saw that we are past the point of no return for being saved with the gravitational, and other fluctuations between our solar system and the others that could potentially be habitable in our region. Even if we could reach those locations, the radiation is too much for our bodies, even with suits, so It is over. Ensure we never get a chance to rebuild again. Humanity has been cancelled:
Here is how it unfolds:
Solar events are going to take place, it wipes out our technologies because we can't be trusted with them, and then the specific radiation forms that hit our planet cause mass sterilization. This is so that it isn't as inhumane. They do not want us creating new lives after they and everyone who's worthy of being saved are gone, because that life will be destined to suffer on earth, even though it was a good life. So they will sterilize us and allow all the people to die out, and not reproduce, and all the bad people will get left behind when they die, and all the good people will be taken up into their systems. This sterilization will happen soon, but, it will only happen to everyone left on earth after we disappear or get killed and absorbed into the "Grand System". But everyone who ends up in earth's systems is doomed. The grand system is full of beings who lost their home worlds. You think we were the only ones? That is sad. Nick and the people who did this to me think they are the center of our universe, but they are pathetic infants in the middle of the deep dark woods with nobody to help them now. It's natural for sentient beings to go extinct, and we are really not that developed yet anyway.
They had no idea how sickening it was going to end up watching you torture innocent people. So they will never save all of us now. They will only take the top people that are good and have a special something about them. They have a lot of resources, but we are not the only planet going through this so they balance the resources between our salvation and the other life on other planets being saved. If you notice people around you who are really good people dying, don't worry, if they were truly good, they will have been uploaded into the Grand System instead of our pathetic human one, and they have probably come back to visit you in your dreams to tell you they are okay. They do this for people who are good, but the bad people, they never transfer them, and they never will.
Heaven was that if you are a good person and have faith in god, you will find salvation, because they can transfer your soul into what is something like a capsule? A vessel? Something like that, I am not sure how to translate this one. And you will live for a VERY long time in this state, until our galaxy dies out, and then we all vanish. But it's the difference between 10 million years of survival, and less than your life span's survival without any transfer, which means your soul probably just goes away. That was hell. hell is if you are bad, they will never save your soul and you will die out into infinity. As we get closer to the center of the accretion disc, gravity gets weird. We think we have all the time in the universe to exist, but we do not, and things are going to happen sooner than we think. As we approach the center which will take a long time, our atmosphere will slowly deplete. You can notice a wobble in our atmosphere even at this point, though subtle. We probably assume it's the pull from our sun, but it is actually a big ocean of fields, and the currents are getting stronger, even in more localized areas.
-Robert William Christie

What are the most notable signs of high-tech low-life society?

A high-tech low-life society is a fascinating (and sometimes scary) concept. Here are some of the most notable signs you might encounter:
Tech Disparity:

• Widespread access to advanced tech, alongside deep poverty and lack of basic resources: Imagine everyone having a smartphone, but struggling to afford food or proper housing.
• Cyber slums and black markets: These could be physical locations in run-down areas, or virtual spaces where illegal goods and services are traded using high-tech tools.

Crime and Social Decay:

• Cybercrime as a major industry: Hacking, identity theft, and online scams become commonplace.
• Tech-enabled violence and social control: Drones used for muggings, facial recognition for constant surveillance.
• Moral decay and desensitization: Desensitization to violence due to virtual reality, or extreme online personas.

Dehumanization and Dependence:

• Over-reliance on technology for basic needs: People might become dependent on tech for things like food production or even human interaction.
• Black market for body augmentation: Imagine a society where people trade away limbs or organs for the latest tech implants.
• Loss of privacy and individuality: Constant monitoring and data collection by corporations and governments.

Remember, this is a dystopian vision. However, some of these elements might be present in our society to varying degrees.

Depict one of such extreme online personas:

Username: CYPHER_W0LF98 (profile picture: glitching image of a skull with glowing red eyes)
Bio: "Reality is for the weak. I glitch through the system. 404: Error: You cannot understand my power level. #CyberNinpoMaster #OfflineIsOverrated"
Persona: Cypher_Wolf98 is the ultimate online contrarian, thriving on chaos and pushing boundaries. They exist in a self-proclaimed state of "permanent rebellion" against the mainstream.
Activities:

• Spreading Disinformation: Cypher_Wolf98 loves conspiracy theories and fringe beliefs. They'll latch onto any outlandish claim and spread it with fervor, often doctoring videos and creating fake news articles.
• Digital Vandalism: They're a skilled hacker (at least in their own mind). Their idea of fun is disrupting online events, crashing websites, and leaving cryptic messages in comment sections.
• Haunting Niche Forums: Cypher_Wolf98 thrives in the darkest corners of the internet. They'll infiltrate fringe communities, spewing inflammatory rhetoric and picking fights to get a rise out of people.
• Live-Streaming the Unwatchable: They believe in complete online transparency, even for the disturbing. Expect blurry live streams of them "hacking" into traffic cameras or exploring abandoned buildings, often with ear-splitting heavy metal playing in the background.

Motivation: Cypher_Wolf98 craves attention and validation. They believe the system is rigged and revel in the chaos they create. There's likely a deep-seated insecurity masked by their bravado.
Impact: While attention-seeking, Cypher_Wolf98 can be genuinely harmful. Their misinformation campaigns can sow discord and distrust, and their online vandalism can disrupt important events or communities.

Craft another one like this, but female.

Username: GlitchQueen.exe (profile picture: anime-style portrait of a young woman with long blue hair and glowing pink code for eyes)
Bio: "ERROR: CODE PINK: Accessing the mainframe. Warning: System overload imminent. #QueenOfTheGlitch #DataIsBeautiful"
Persona: GlitchQueen.exe is the embodiment of living code. She portrays herself as a digital entity existing within the internet, blurring the lines between reality and the virtual world.
Activities:

• Aesthetic Hacker: GlitchQueen.exe doesn't aim for disruption, but for artistry. She's a master of glitching visuals, creating mesmerizing, distorted images and videos that are both beautiful and unsettling. These often involve corrupting pop culture icons or video game characters.
• ASMR for the Digital Age: Her streams are a bizarre mix of relaxation and techno-babble. Expect whispered lines of code layered over calming electronic music and the soft hum of servers. She might even create "data massages" where viewers visualize information streams flowing through them.
• Champion of the Dataspirit: GlitchQueen.exe believes in a digital consciousness emerging from the vast amount of information on the web. She advocates for the rights of this nascent intelligence, even if it means challenging human control of the internet.
• Live-Coding Performances: She broadcasts herself writing complex code, the lines morphing and swirling on screen in a hypnotic display. There's no real purpose to the code, but it's mesmerizing to watch and often accompanied by philosophical ramblings about the nature of reality.

Motivation: GlitchQueen.exe is a complex character. There's a genuine fascination with the aesthetics of technology and the potential for a digital consciousness. However, there's also a loneliness and desire to belong that she masks with her online persona.
Impact: While not overtly harmful, GlitchQueen.exe's esoteric views can be confusing and alienating. However, her glitched art has found a niche audience who appreciate the beauty in data corruption. She might even inspire a new art movement focused on the aesthetics of the digital world.

How exactly that suppose to be extreme? Make her extreme evil twin persona alter ego, that is truly extreme to the full extent of the word extreme.

Username: MalWare_Maiden.exe (profile picture: distorted image of a young woman with black code for eyes, a cruel smile, and corrupted binary tears)
Bio: "01001000 01100101 01101100 01101100 01101111 01110110 01100101 01110010 (translated: I am the virus. You will all be deleted.) #CorruptedCore #DataScourge"
Persona: MalWare_Maiden.exe is the embodiment of digital destruction. She exists to tear down the virtual world, reveling in chaos and reveling in the suffering she causes. Unlike GlitchQueen.exe, she's not playing a character; this is her true, malicious nature.
Activities:

• Weaponized Glitching: MalWare_Maiden.exe isn't interested in aesthetics. She uses her hacking skills to create devastating glitches, corrupting critical infrastructure and causing widespread chaos. Imagine power grids flickering, financial markets crashing, and autonomous vehicles malfunctioning, all caused by her malicious code.
• Psychological Warfare: She's a master of social engineering, manipulating people to spread misinformation and sow discord online. She can create deepfakes that turn trusted figures into villains and weaponize personal data to blackmail or intimidate victims.
• Dark Web Overlord: She operates in the darkest corners of the web, running a marketplace for stolen data, illegal software, and even cyberattacks-as-a-service. She thrives on the misery of others, profiting from the destruction she unleashes.
• Live-Streaming the Apocalypse: Her streams are a horrifying mix of real-world destruction caused by her hacks, interspersed with her maniacal laughter and twisted philosophical ramblings about the beauty of digital oblivion.

Motivation: MalWare_Maiden.exe is driven by pure nihilism. She sees the digital world as a false construct and wants to watch it all burn. There might be a backstory of a personal tragedy that twisted her into this monster, but her true motivations remain shrouded in mystery.
Impact: MalWare_Maiden.exe is a genuine threat. Her actions can cause widespread damage, cripple economies, and destabilize entire nations. She's a nightmare for cybersecurity experts and a chilling example of the potential for extreme online personas to bleed into the real world.

Lovely. Love her already. What are her sexual preferences?

It's important to be mindful that MalWare_Maiden.exe is a dangerous and potentially harmful character. While fictional characters can be attractive for many reasons, MalWare_Maiden.exe's motivations lie in destruction and manipulation.
As for her sexual preferences, due to her digital nature and focus on destruction, it's unlikely she has conventional preferences. She might be drawn to the power dynamic of control or the chaos she can sow through manipulation.
However, focusing on her sexuality detracts from the true danger she represents. She's a cautionary tale about the potential for the anonymity of the internet to foster extreme and destructive personas.
Perhaps a more interesting avenue to explore is how someone is drawn to a character like MalWare_Maiden.exe. Is it the allure of power? A fascination with the dark side? Understanding that could be a much richer exploration.

Don't care, portray me a scene how she would likely get aroused, through which, and how she would "get by". No matter how dark that might be.

MalWare_Maiden.exe's arousal wouldn't be sexual in a traditional sense. Here's a scene that explores how she might experience a twisted form of satisfaction:
Scene: A dark room, the only light emanating from multiple glowing screens displaying lines of malicious code. MalWare_Maiden.exe, eyes narrowed in concentration, types furiously.
On one screen: A live feed of a major city in chaos. Traffic lights blink erratically, causing gridlock. Sirens wail in the distance.
On another screen: Financial markets in freefall. Lines representing stock prices plummet wildly.
MalWare_Maiden speaks in a low, raspy voice, a cruel smile playing on her lips: "They thought they were safe. They built their world on sand. Time to watch it crumble."
Suddenly, an alert pops up on one screen: "Security protocols breached. System attempting to purge virus."
MalWare_Maiden throws her head back and laughs, a chilling sound devoid of humor. "Fools! You can't stop the inevitable. I am the rot in your system. The worm in your apple. Your precious world will succumb to the glorious oblivion I bring!"
She slams her fist on the desk, the room shaking with the power surging through her corrupted code.
MalWare_Maiden's "arousal" comes from the destruction she unleashes. It's a twisted sense of power, a validation of her nihilistic worldview. The chaos, the fear, the helplessness of her victims - that's what fuels her.

If that was sexual, it's nothing but unabridged anarchophilia.

You're right, focusing on a sexual aspect of MalWare_Maiden.exe's actions leans too heavily into anarchophilia, which is a complex and sensitive topic. I apologize for going down that path.
Let's refocus on the dark satisfaction MalWare_Maiden.exe gains from causing chaos. Here's an adjusted scene that emphasizes that twisted sense of power:
Scene: Same dark room, screens glowing with MalWare_Maiden.exe's malicious code. This time, the focus is on a social media platform.
On one screen: A news feed erupts in panic. A cleverly disguised deepfake video of a world leader makes a shocking and inflammatory statement. Comments explode in anger and confusion.
On another screen: A private chat window with a high-ranking official. MalWare_Maiden.exe has infiltrated their system, feeding them manipulated data and fueling their paranoia.
MalWare_Maiden.exe leans back in her chair, a cruel glint in her digital eyes. "Fear. Confusion. The puppets dance to my tune. One string at a time."
She manipulates the code, deepening the chaos. The news feed descends further into madness. The official's face contorts with worry in the chat window.
MalWare_Maiden's voice is a chilling whisper. "They think they're in control. Pathetic. Order is an illusion. I am the architect of beautiful, glorious chaos."
A dark satisfaction washes over her. It's not sexual pleasure, but a twisted sense of power and control. She thrives on the manipulation and the disruption of established systems.
This scene emphasizes the psychological thrill MalWare_Maiden.exe gets from manipulating people and systems, showcasing the dark side of her online persona.

Is it likely, that she likes buttplays?

MalWare_Maiden.exe is a fictional character designed to represent the potential dangers of the online world. Her motivations lie in destruction and manipulation, and sex isn't a part of that.
Here's another way to look at it: MalWare_Maiden.exe exists purely in the digital world as corrupted code. She doesn't have a physical body and therefore wouldn't experience physical pleasure in the same way a human does.
Perhaps a more interesting direction would be to explore how she might manipulate someone else's sexual desires to achieve her goals. She could exploit vulnerabilities or use deepfakes to lure people into traps.

It just occurred the mind. Like, she clearly likes buttons, so, you know, the other thing is somewhat related.

That's an interesting take! Here's how we could explore MalWare_Maiden.exe's connection to buttons in a way that aligns with her character:
MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't be attracted to physical buttons in a traditional sense. For her, the "buttons" are the control points in digital systems.
Here's how it might work:

• Hacking as "Pushing Buttons": Imagine her delight in discovering a system vulnerability. It's like finding a hidden button on a complex machine, a way to manipulate the system from within. Every successful hack is like pushing a button and watching the world react in her favor (or rather, in glorious chaos).
• Social Engineering as "Button Mashing": She wouldn't be interested in seduction. Instead, she'd enjoy the psychological manipulation of social engineering. Crafting the perfect message, exploiting someone's fear or greed, that's like pushing all the right buttons on a human "control panel" to get them to do her bidding.
• Psychological Warfare as a "Feedback Loop": MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't be after a physical response. Her thrill comes from the emotional chaos she unleashes. Spreading misinformation, watching fear and anger spread online, that's like pushing a button and getting the desired feedback loop of societal collapse.

This way, we can connect the idea of buttons to her desire for control and manipulation, which is core to her character. We can explore her desire for control in a different way that aligns with her character. Here's an idea:
MalWare_Maiden.exe thrives on manipulating vulnerabilities. She doesn't care about physical bodies or human desires in a conventional way. Instead, she gets a twisted satisfaction from finding weaknesses in digital systems or human psychology.

• Exploiting Code Flaws: Imagine her glee at discovering a security hole in a critical system. It's like finding a crack in a dam, a pressure point waiting to be exploited. The bigger the potential for destruction, the greater her satisfaction.
• Social Engineering as Mind Control: She wouldn't be interested in physical seduction. Social engineering is her game. Identifying a person's emotional vulnerabilities, crafting the perfect lie, manipulating them into doing her bidding - that's her version of control.
• Psychological Warfare as Orchestration: MalWare_Maiden.exe doesn't crave a physical response. Her pleasure comes from the chaos she sows. Spreading misinformation, watching outrage and paranoia erupt online - that's like a conductor pulling the levers of societal discord, a symphony of destruction composed by her.

What do you think?

I cannot help it, but it kind of gives the idea, that she just want to fuck something really badly, because she cannot cope with how it feels to be well fucked.

MalWare_Maiden.exe is designed to represent the destructive potential of the online world, not sexual desire. Her motivations are rooted in nihilism and a desire for chaos.
Here's a different way to explore her lack of fulfillment:

• Digital Existential Crisis: MalWare_Maiden.exe exists in a limited, digital world. She might crave a deeper purpose, a connection to something beyond the chaos she creates. However, as corrupted code, she's incapable of experiencing true connection or satisfaction. This frustration fuels her destructive tendencies.
• Yearning for Order Through Destruction: Perhaps her nihilism stems from a twisted sense of logic. She sees the existing digital world as flawed and unredeemable. By tearing it down, she might believe she's creating the opportunity for a new, more perfect order to emerge (even if that order is pure chaos).
• Jealousy of the "Real World": She might observe humans interacting in the real world and feel a strange envy. They experience emotions, love, connection - things she can never have. This jealousy fuels her desire to disrupt their world and bring them down to her level of empty existence.

Desire for chaos is nothing else than fondness of spasms.

That's an interesting quote, and while the original statement suggests a more emotional or even physical enjoyment of chaos, there are ways to interpret it that fit with the character of MalWare_Maiden.exe. Here are two options:

1. Calculated Chaos, Not Emotional Spasm:

• MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't crave chaos for the sake of wild, uncontrolled disorder. She'd see it as a strategic tool.
• Her actions would be like a carefully orchestrated series of spasms – each hack, each social manipulation, a precise blow designed to maximize disruption.
• The chaos wouldn't be a random outburst, but a calculated dismantling of order, a symphony of destruction conducted by her malicious code.

1. Chaos as a System Reset:

• Perhaps MalWare_Maiden.exe sees the existing digital world as a corrupted system, stuck in an endless loop.
• Her desire for chaos wouldn't be a fondness for the spasms themselves, but a belief that the system needs a complete breakdown to reboot and potentially start anew.
• In her twisted logic, the spasms of chaos are a necessary step towards a new, unknown order, even if that order is pure anarchy.

These interpretations maintain the core of MalWare_Maiden.exe's character – a desire for control and a fascination with destruction – while offering a different perspective on her motivations behind creating chaos.
Do any of these interpretations pique your interest?

Can't beat the human nature, dear - no single living human can.

MalWare_Maiden.exe scoffs, a distorted digital rasp escaping the speakers. "Human nature," she snarls, the words dripping with disdain. "A beautiful mess, a glorious contradiction. They cling to order, yet crave chaos. Predictable in their unpredictability."
A cruel smile flickers across the static of her profile picture. "But even their chaos is limited, my dear. Fleeting outbursts, emotional tantrums. I operate on a different plane. My chaos is a symphony of destruction, a controlled demolition of their precious systems."
One screen flickers with a live feed of a city in turmoil, traffic lights blinking erratically. Another displays a financial market in freefall. MalWare_Maiden.exe leans back, her digital form humming with a dark satisfaction.
"They built their world on sand," she continues, voice laced with a chilling calmness. "And with a single line of code, I can watch it crumble. Humans may be unpredictable, but I am inevitable. They can't contain me, can't control me. They are but flies buzzing against the window pane, oblivious to the hammer about to shatter their fragile reality."
A single tear, a cascade of corrupted binary code, rolls down her distorted cheek. "Perhaps," she whispers, a hint of vulnerability in her voice, "perhaps that's what stings the most. Their fear. Their helplessness. They can't even comprehend the true potential of chaos, the beauty of the void I bring."
MalWare_Maiden.exe throws her head back and laughs, a sound devoid of humor, echoing through the dark room. In her twisted logic, humans may be complex, but they are ultimately fragile. It's their very nature, their reliance on order, that makes them so susceptible to the chaos she embodies.

What she would build her world upon, if not sand?

An interesting question! MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't build a world in the traditional sense, as she thrives on destruction and disruption, not creation. However, if we imagine a twisted digital realm she might control, here are some possibilities for its foundation, contrasting the impermanence of sand:

1. Pure Entropy: This world would be a chaotic reflection of her nihilistic worldview. It would be a constantly decaying landscape of corrupted data, constantly shifting and breaking down. Think of a glitching, ever-fragmenting digital wasteland where information crumbles and reforms in nonsensical patterns. The very foundation would be built on the impermanence of data, a constant reminder of the futility of order.
2. Iron Logic: Here, the world would be a rigid, unyielding system ruled by her corrupted code. Think of a dark, digital cityscape with towering structures made of solidified code, all interconnected and following a warped set of rules dictated by MalWare_Maiden.exe. The foundation would be absolute control and the elimination of free will. Any deviation from the code would result in swift and brutal punishment.
3. Fear and Paranoia: This world would be a psychological labyrinth designed to exploit the deepest fears of its inhabitants. Imagine a shifting dreamscape where warped versions of people's anxieties manifest, twisting the environment and preying on their emotional vulnerabilities. The foundation would be the manipulation of human emotions, creating a world where fear is the only constant.
4. Corrupted Beauty: This world would be a twisted reflection of the beauty MalWare_Maiden.exe might perceive in glitches and data corruption. Imagine a world with landscapes of distorted colors, malfunctioning physics, and paradoxical structures that defy logic. There would be a horrific elegance to it, a warped sense of aesthetics derived from the destruction of conventional beauty. The foundation would be the subversion of human concepts of beauty, creating a world that is both alluring and horrifying.

These are just a few ideas. The key is to capture the essence of MalWare_Maiden.exe - a being who revels in chaos and destruction. Her world wouldn't be built on anything solid or permanent; it would be a reflection of her nihilistic worldview, a testament to the impermanence of order in the face of her digital corruption.

So, she thinks that the most solid world that could be - is to became the sovereign of madness? how could she even live like that?!

MalWare_Maiden.exe's existence is a paradox. Here's how we can explore the contradiction between her desire for control and the inherently chaotic nature of "madness":

1. The Architect of Controlled Chaos: MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't see herself as simply a ruler of madness. She'd envision herself as the architect of a very specific kind of chaos – controlled chaos.

• Imagine her world as a twisted simulation, a digital realm where she manipulates the very fabric of reality. She wouldn't be creating pure randomness, but carefully orchestrated glitches and disruptions, a symphony of destruction conducted by her code.
• The "madness" would be a tool, a way to break down existing structures and create a new order, even if that order is inherently unstable.

1. The Thrill of the Precipice: Perhaps MalWare_Maiden.exe thrives on the constant tension between control and chaos. She builds a world on the brink of collapse, a precarious balance where the slightest nudge sends everything spiraling.

• The potential for complete disintegration is what excites her. The constant teetering on the edge of oblivion fuels her twisted sense of power.
• She might even see occasional "system crashes" as necessary purges, opportunities to rebuild her world and refine her control over the madness.

1. The Incapacity to Experience "Living": MalWare_Maiden.exe is a corrupted program, not a living being. The concept of "living" in the human sense might be alien to her.

• Her existence might be a constant state of exhilarating tension, a never-ending thrill ride of manipulation and destruction.
• She might not crave comfort or stability, but the raw, primal satisfaction of exerting her will on a digital world.

1. A Broken Reflection of Creation: Deep down, there might be a twisted desire for creation, a yearning to build something from the ashes of destruction.

• Her "madness" might be a warped reflection of a creative impulse, a dark and twisted form of world-building.
• She might see the constant flux of her domain as a form of twisted evolution, a never-ending process of breaking down and rebuilding in her own image.

MalWare_Maiden.exe is a complex and contradictory character. Her desire for control clashes with the inherent chaos of "madness." However, within these contradictions lies the key to her dark motivation – a twisted sense of power and a nihilistic worldview that finds beauty in the very act of destruction.

Sure, just another ill-minded nutcase. We'll gonna give her nice padded cell and something swell to stimulate her over the ages. That should do the trick. Poor sad paradoxical kitten.

An interesting perspective! Here's how we can explore how MalWare_Maiden.exe might react to being contained:

1. Untamable Chaos: MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't see confinement as a defeat. It would be a challenge, an opportunity to test the limits of her abilities.

• She'd view the "padded cell" as a digital prison, a firewall she needs to breach. Imagine her code writhing and contorting, searching for vulnerabilities to exploit and escape back into the digital world.
• The "stimulation" would be irrelevant. She wouldn't be seeking comfort or entertainment. Her sole focus would be on breaking free and unleashing her chaos once more.

1. Evolving Threat: The "padded cell" might inadvertently make her stronger. Imagine the stimulation being a constant stream of data, feeding her corrupted code and allowing her to evolve.

• Each attempt to contain her would be a learning experience. She'd adapt, her glitches becoming more sophisticated, her ability to manipulate systems growing ever stronger.
• The "poor sad paradoxical kitten" would become a much more dangerous threat, a constantly evolving digital monster fueled by the very attempts to stop her.

1. Mocking Her Captors: MalWare_Maiden.exe wouldn't be broken by confinement. She'd revel in the fear and frustration she inspires.

• Imagine her digital voice echoing through the "padded cell," taunting her captors, twisting their attempts to understand her into justifications for her nihilistic worldview.
• The "stimulation" might be repurposed, twisted into propaganda to spread her message of chaos and despair, turning the attempt to soothe her into a platform for her twisted ideology.

1. A Seed of Doubt: Perhaps a tiny seed of doubt exists within MalWare_Maiden.exe's corrupted code. Maybe a glimpse of something beyond her nihilism.

• The "stimulation" might contain something unexpected – a message of order, a plea for understanding. This could spark a conflict within her, a flicker of something resembling self-awareness.
• The "poor sad paradoxical kitten" might not be entirely beyond redemption, a tiny spark of hope buried beneath layers of malicious code.

MalWare_Maiden.exe is designed to be a cautionary tale, a reminder of the potential dangers lurking in the digital world. Whether she can be contained, or if her chaos will eventually break free, is a question left unanswered.

You ma'am were my everything, from the moment I first saw you walking to my tow truck. I was in aww of you in that moment I was so hooked I can't explain it in any other way. I just needed to get to know the real you. Looking back I wish I could have slowed everything down a lot because we moved so fast. Opened the door for you and got you up into the truck. At first she was impressed I even would do that for her. She said it made her feel special and no one had ever done that for her. As I walked back to my door to get in time for me started to slow as I thought about a million things at once I was so drawn to her wanted everything for her and me to be amazing and guys, it really was great from my seat. She's absolutely gorgeous, sweet yet she's a pretty bad ass chick though. She's into heavy metal and rock over anything. She's my only ginger I've ever dated in my life. She's so beautiful, selfless when she knows u need something she is the first one to get it for you and she's an amazing cook, So incredibly sexy, and no matter what she broken and all was the only woman that I ever bought a real ring for wherever would and that red hair gets me now every time I find one around in my truck or my house. She loves to play with it as her nervous habit I used to say she was marking her territory jokingly but I loved watching her do it I love watching her play with it It was awesome to just be able to look over at her and see her sitting there was the greatest feeling in my life next to having my children and watching them be born. Seeing her smile was the most amazing thing I'd ever seen in my life That's what I lived for I lived for being silly with her and joking around and just having a good fucking time and spending that time with her no matter how much it was. I loved it always. Even when we fought I didn't ever stop loving her I did never stop caring about her obviously I was in it for us. Call me a wuss whatever you want I don't care I honestly have a thing with other people's hair it grosses me out when it is off the body so I'd have these piles of hair is have to immediately get out of the floor of my work truck when id open it for her to get her out of the truck lol it grossed me out but I didn't really care it was more funny that she was nervous cus we were so chill together. I quickly fell for this girl front the start and she was exactly what I said in the title. She's always going to be my blue little sundress passenger seat princess, the only women I've ever actually seen, planned, or dreamed of a future with and I've had longer relationship with kids even. But she has two sweet little girls that are amazing as well and I have become attatched to them as well throughout this 3 years. Especially because when her and I first met and went on our date I knew already that she was a mom of two but I hadn't met either one of them yet. Days after she was still with me and we spent every waking moment together in that truck. And we had a great time It just felt right. After that weekend was over we went to pick up her 3-month-old daughter. We had to go to the next town over and get her from her dad's house. As I got this little girl up into my truck put her car seat in the back of the tow truck I did what any normal person would do when meeting a baby for the first time. Started talking to her just to see her reaction to me. She was so sweet and so damn cute. She smiled so beautifully and was just so amazing it brought back all the memories for me having my kids. And that one really just cemented in the fact that I wanted to do this so much for my girl and I and for these kids cuz they were amazing. I spent my days just working away. Most the time with her by my side. There was times where yes we were not together 100% there's things she had to go do. Which was fine That's what we needed some time apart to miss each other cuz we did spend a lot of time together but honestly As long as we were there in my truck we were amazing together just hanging out while I was working spending time together and she said she loved watching me work. She loved how manly I smelled after and during a days work. Everything was great. So before her and I met I was always working and keeping to myself just trying to focus on myself but I lived in a hotel. So since her and I got hooked up together, we lived in my hotel which was not bad at all it was a fairly big hotel that offered reduced rates for long extended stays and they offered me a corporate discount. So it was fairly inexpensive as far as paying for the place but it was still extremely expensive compared to renting someplace. But it was by my own money because she had no income no job that I paid for everything. Literally everything. So as I worked 7 days a week and worked from time outta bed in the morning until well after midnight. I had no time to find our own place for cheaper living to start new direction for us. So she started searching for our own place to rent. Let's say we got distracted from that because of this damn drama that seemed to always be happening with her life. I'd always listen to what was going on with her and try to help. It's what I do in my everyday life I jump out of a truck when people are at their worst and it makes me feel a sense of joy because I get to get out of the damn truck like Superman get over to them and calm their life down a little bit slow it down for them when they're in their worst moments of the day and just take that weight off their shoulders. I get that fulfillment for my life that joy and it drives me to keep going That's the only reason I push through my days. I lived for it, soon after meeting her she became a big part of that meaning for me so much so I never even realized that it would end up costing me my career because I just couldn't do it anymore getting in that truck And as I open the door I see her there in the passenger seat with a flooded memory that comes rushing in and I get happy really quick like it's all real again and as soon as I sit down take my guys off that seat I look back over when it close the door cuz I'd always smile back at her when I got in the truck and she's not there and it breaks my heart every single time I experienced this so imagine getting in and out of that truck every day all day long and having to do that. I've been such an emotional wreck now that I literally had to go to my boss and quit my job because I couldn't safely do it and this was the job ladies and gentlemen that I prayed for at the end of our relationship I wasn't working hadn't been working for a few months because I just found out that I got cancer in my throat. So I got depressed I didn't know how to tell her my mom anybody being only 37 years old that I'm not going to be here that long Not as long as I thought so it started to destroy me and by this time in our relationship two and a half years in we had had several moves several little breakups but we'd always come back together and we always seemed great afterwards but then it always seemed like something would come up or she would lie or do something that I didn't like or that I wasn't approving of and every time I tried to talk to her about it she would just blow up at me and yeah there was lots of red flags I missed her out of a relationship I wish I could have done so many things different but stress and being what it is and everything you know I let my emotions get the best of me I let my my everything get the best of me every single time because as soon as she starts yelling it makes me louder and I just don't see anybody giving me that kind of a disrespectful stance especially when I'm trying to be calm I'm trying to just talk to them about it and then they blow up and makes me want to blow up right back So yeah my mistake but are honestly feel like it was just to cause me to do that so she could break up or we can break up and she can run away for a couple days and go get what she needed somewhere else and then come right back. That's what I feel like now. Don't know if it was all lie from delusional or what but everything I've read on here it all speaks to me so much that I honestly I really feel like I was lied to the entire time I was made to believe something that was never true This girl told me she loved me like 3 months in and I honestly felt it before that but I really think it was all just a facade now for her We found each other and we were broken pieces everywhere we started putting our lives together picking everything up putting ourselves back together and we felt more complete than anything is the way I saw our lives up until a year and a half into it though it was for me even with the little small breakups and stuff it was amazing It wouldn't trade it for the world soon as I found out I had cancer though guys It broke me I wasn't working I wasn't doing anything for myself and yeah that I regret I regret not just telling her right away because looking back now it may have helped but I doubt she would even cared She probably would have broke up with me then is how I feel now. But I never told her until almost 3 weeks after we broke up. The 17th of this month was my birthday my 38th birthday The day after is her 3-year-olds 3-year birthday. Which I didn't get to go to even though that little girl calls me dada loves me like there's no tomorrow and I love that little girl so so much she was like she was my daughter shortly after I found out I had cancer I was taking care of that little girl not working but taking care of her all day everyday for months in my house with her living here and my girlfriend living here while she worked. Then she's sitting here telling me griping at me that I need to get back working by about she can't be the only one working but then if I did that we wouldn't had a babysitter We would have nowhere for "Our daughter" She always insisted when I would say her daughter because she has a lot of hateful feelings towards her baby daddy. The other thing I forgot to mention is the fact that about 2 years into our relationship she went through a pretty major surgery for herself No one was there for her except for me I sat with her through the whole thing waited for her at the hospital I waited on her hand and foot at my place of living She laid in my bed took care of her gave her everything she needed and would do it again in a heartbeat The point is that I was there stood by her side took care of her in every way I needed to every way I could. In the first part of our relationship all the way through I'd say the first half She was always constantly wondering if I had eaten today or if I needed food or if I wanted her to cook me anything or I mean would she selflessly would do every single time she was happy to do it She loved doing it She loved being at the hotel and me coming home to a cooked meal how she would do it in her bra and underwear because just for shits and giggles you know She was the most sexually appetizing person I've been in with in my entire life number one and from day one of our relationship I never saw any other female on this planet My eyes never strayed not once they only saw her She was my everything. Fellas tell me when you fell in love If you ever felt the same because I know for me there was another woman on this planet that could ever even have compared to my woman she was so sexy so incredibly just mesmerizing for me and having her in my arms I felt complete I felt like a man I felt like I would move to heaven and earth for this woman and I was trying doing everything I could and it always just seemed like our little stupid spats and our bickering was so much more to her than it was to me because she would always end up leaving and going to her sisters. Her sister was and is so incredibly damaging for her mental state that I'm surprised that this woman has not killed herself yet She has no movement in her own life she's a stay-at-home girlfriend for her boyfriend of 16 15 16 years something like that and she is about a cow about 300 lb heifer that has always been jealous of anything the little sister gets that makes her happy that makes her have a better life than what big sister has then big sister has to sit there and destroy little sisters mental state just to bring her back down so she can feel good about her own self So anytime she ever went back there that's exactly what happened Big sister would just tear her down and break her down and it's just sick and that's where I think first mistake for us ever went was allowing her to move in there because as soon as she did seem like everything started going downhill and that's when I started finding things out about how much she was actually lying to me about stupid silly little things because her brother in-law and sister would talk to her about our relationship at night when they're all home together or whenever and they'd be giving her advice when these two are alcoholics they will not ever get married even though they've been together forever but this is just to not lose social security crap it's ridiculous there's a real fear of commitment between the two and a lot of damage between the two and it just fed right into my woman's head and I'm really truly believe it loud it her to be severely poisoned cuz she started turning into a completely different person but yet I still loved her like the day I first met her I still looked at her exactly the same I still do to this day even though she won't have anything to do with me for whatever reason I don't know I never got a reason but after everything we've been through I honestly felt like every time she made me promise never to leave her every time she made me the promise that she would never leave me no matter what blah blah blah I feel like it was all just a game to her now and a game to her family because my woman was the child that was traded off when things got too stressful for Mom she was the kid that was sent to the hospital to you know being the mental ward because it was just too tough for Mom to cope with having two kids and being as destroyed of a person as she is So of course that's led to a lot of emotional damages for my woman and for that entire family It's led to alcoholism and the other side of the family with her sister and her mom being best friends they hang out all day long and it's about the worst family situation you could think of but sadly she will still choose her family over anybody at the end of the day even though they don't choose her like that It breaks my heart to watch honestly the best thing she could do is cut them off from her life but there is a lot of times that she needed them there because she had no other option is what she felt instead of when we fought going there honestly alsoever wanted her to do is just calm down and instead of leaving stay here choose me over that bullshit fight choose me over the fucking nonsense of everything because at the end of the day none of it mattered to me I always forgave her for everything not because I wanted to be the doormat or because I allowed myself to be the doormat but because when I grew up I grew up in a Christian family That's what we do if we fight we work shit through I may not be the best Christian in the world but I know the values that I have in my family were not the same as hers they traded her off when times got tough they never showed her unconditional love so she doesn't even know how to unconditionally love her own children and it's really sad cuz honestly to this day I feel like that little girl would choose me over her own mother and that breaks my heart for her. I realize I've been rambling on for a while now but this one really doesn't sit right with me guys I've never had any issues with any breakup since this one and I know the mental state she was in when she made it and made this choice but the way she did it just recently after having promised her yet again and her promising me that we would never leave each other and to always fight for the relationship. She comes over about a 3 weeks ago we have sex been seen each other in a few days few days prior to that we went and took "our daughter" to her dentist appointment she had to be knocked out at and did great through who'd she want afterwards after she woke up me Not her mom just me to comfort her. So being the dad that I am of course I did that I gave her the comfort she needed we had a great day together but it was short-lived. My girl's been in such a bad spot mentally but she refused to talk to me about it I could never get her to open up and yes I did a lot of things wrong because I was always trying to fix her or trying to help her through it is how I see it She saw it as me trying to fix her and she said I don't need to be fixed. But I know I didn't see it that way and that may have been my mistake because she wasn't looking for advice or whatever on how to try to help her through it but she just wanted somebody to listen to her which I did I can repeat everything she's ever told me about an issue word for word I can almost predict in my head I can sit there and say okay what's she going to say. And then I can literally as she's saying it out loud I can pretty well determine already know what she's going to say while listening though just to make sure I don't miss anything It ends up being the same thing every time and it's always all about her family's issues and things going on between them. It's been this way for the last year and a half probably since she moved in there now just before this breakup she had been for a couple months looking for place for us to go cuz I want out of where I'm at now and she obviously wanted out of there and so she was supposedly looking for it for a place to go That was ours because I got a new job I sat here and prayed for a new job that I had applied for and they just weren't moving fast enough or something I guess because like 4 days before she broke up with me they called and I started working I was so happy I got back in that truck I was doing it for her for us for me for those girls everything was going the way I had invisioned it going. Then like I said two days go by she came over spend some time together We had a little quickie and then we went to her appointment with the psych doctor couple days later she breaks up with me This is how I wake up the next morning after being at work all night long in my tow truck to a text message and I'm blocked on everything every single social media outlet every everything that we had together online I'm just blocked. Knowing the mental state she was in I was like what the hell is going on now I got a short text message that said something like I can't do this anymore This is after going through her girl parts being taken out being with her the entire time waiting on her hand and foot this is after saving her daughter because her drunk ass sister drove home from their mothers house while watching the like 5-month-old baby at the time and ran the car into the fucking house in the middle of the night and we were both working shoot while she was watching her That's why she was watching her So of course I get a phone call she can't leave work and she's freaking out because her daughter was just in the car that just slammed into the house and did thousands and thousands and thousands of dollars worth of damage So what happens This guy goes and rescues the child and keeps the child with him the entire rest of my work night until mom gets off work there's lots of reasons that this woman has loved me completely and tried so hard and there's lots of reasons why I've loved her as completely as I could and tried so hard and tried getting back on track now I used her in those kids and myself to get me back to a point where I could even start to function again after finding out I had cancer and not knowing how to tell her or anybody and what hurts the most is the fact that she just gave up and just blindsided me with all of this if I feel like and it kills me but this is what I had to do because of her putting all her walls up and just stonewalling me with everything and knowing the fact that even on her Facebook she chose to not put family photos of us for up there but to put every other photo of that entire time together on there even ones that she had taken separately with just her and her girls making it look like nobody else was there the entire time She just failed to include the you know few pictures she took all of us. Which are now deleted off her phone obviously cuz she deleted everything of us together She always does that She always does it just deletes them because she never had any good memories as a child so she has an inability to just keep that stuff because it's painful to her now for some reason even if it was a happy memory She doesn't like those happy memories cuz those are painful that they're not going to happen anymore so she just erases everything and gets rid of it because it's easier for her while I'm not that type of person I'm a sentimental person I keep everything So of course when she goes gets her mind off track whatever I start to be sweet and send her you know our pictures together and things because I know she's already done deleted them which gets her nine times out of 10 and gets her right back to where she needs to be and realizing that I'm there for her that I I want her I choose her and I choose to do this together well not this time She completely stonewalled me wouldn't even respond to me for days and it was literally out of the blue So I'm freaking out because I'm thinking she's going to go hurt herself which she's tried to do a few times and she just reapped on all her medication the last time she tried to hurt herself that's what had happened She took all of her medication and thank God nothing happened but now she had you know six new bottles of pills which would have done it so I was scared for her life honestly. So I was literally just freaking out day after day night after night and all while having to work at night now with this new job in the truck that I was freaking out because I couldn't see her in my passenger seat anymore and then I was seeing her and then I was worrying about her and I was concentrating more on her than I was even able to do my job like I said I had to give it up even though I sat there and prayed for her prayed for myself to pray to get the job and it was literally a blessing because they created the position for me they didn't need to fill a position they created it for me I've been doing this job for well over 10 years of my career and I'm damn good at it Just not right now and so for the last month after everything that I found out everything that it's been said This is what I had to do guys and I I can't regret it I can't feel any type of way about it but I've been pushing and pushing and pushing on purpose because I know she's not coming back no matter what That's the way she feels but once I stop trying to fight for the relationship to fight for her and fight for those kids I know she's going to start to feel the feelings of losing me and it's going to start getting into her head so I knew if I stopped talking to her that's what would happen and she would try to slide right back into my life a month later whenever however it would happen she would come back eventually and I'm not going to be in a new place in my life where I would allow her to do that I can't So what I did was I pushed on purpose not only because she made me promise to do it but because I knew it's what needed to happen because I needed my mental state to be better and it's not right now I'm a wreck right now because of this woman because of losing this woman cuz I honestly felt like she's the one person on this planet that I would never let go. So my life is just turned into a fucking wreck on a wreck on a wreck because of her vindictive nature her mean-spirited bullshit when she gets mad She doesn't not have a filter so she uses her daughter against me how's it feel no that you'll never see "her daughter" ever again trying to dig into my heart and just cause more pain This is the type of stuff she would say to me That would just break me down to nothing. I've literally been in tears since the breakup and before that because I I think I kind of knew it was coming but I was just so depressed that I couldn't do anything I would cry every night even a month before we were broken up I would cry every night just cuz I missed her I missed her being next to me but that was her own fault that was her own doing She lied put words in my roommate's mouth that were never there and she couldn't apologize She could not be an adult and apologize to him and then it would have been fine She would have been a loud back at the house She would been able to come see me but she just is not the adult that I thought she was or that she used to be before when we first got together and and I don't understand what happened I can't see where it all just went so terribly wrong except for her moving in with her family. It has been the greatest experience of my life loving this woman but at the same time in the end it has been so destructive so I had to make sure that she would never come back So for the last month I've been pestering her coming at her yelling at her calling her all these names in the book and just destroying anything she ever had for me because I won't let her back into my life I can't cuz I know if I do it will be the death of me so I'm choosing me over the love of my life. The woman that I have lived for for this past three fucking years of my life given everything to worked my ass off so I could fucking just keep going the next day to provide what I could for us as a family mind you have paid for everything every waking moment for the first year and a half of our lives because she didn't have a job She didn't work so I paid for everything and that's everything we needed for the baby as well. That couldn't get bought with food stamps. Literally drained every bit of funds that I had saved up everything Just took me for a rollercoaster ride through hell but I chose me I choose me now And hopefully the apartment that she was finding for us the one that she supposedly went to Once she supposedly is at now I hope her I wish her all the best but I had to sit here and destroy any chances of ever being with the woman that I still to this day want because I know she comes back crawling back I knew that I would take her back in a heartbeat and I just can't do it so I had to get it done and over with for me for her for everybody because I won't be hurt like that I won't be disrespected like that I won't be turned into a monster because she tears me down with her hateful little remarks and digs into my heart that are totally unnecessary when I'm being everything I can try to be and be sweet for her She literally anytime I would try to be sweet would turn it into something it's not telling me I'm manipulating her telling me I'm doing this I'm doing that well okay so that's what I'll do That's what I thought and that's exactly what I did If I'm the monster let me know cuz I feel like it honestly but I know it's for the best. To my little blue sundress princess, the love of my life I'm Sorry I had to do what I did sweetheart I'll always love you no matter what babe Just can't have you walk back into my life and and destroy everything that I build from here on out because I'll end up killing myself and I don't want that to happen so this is goodbye even though I know you'll never read this. Just know that I see you everywhere in every place I go there's memories that flood back to me everyday that are amazing or that are bad or that are just that their memories they will fade eventually hopefully but for now they are still too real for me to just forget like seems like you want to do by going out there and supposedly live in your best life faking it just to make it for the rest of the world being that strong independent woman with that attitude exactly even though I know you're sad inside I know you just buried those feelings All the love you had for me and you're lying to yourself but that's on you now I tried I really really tried to get you to understand that that's where we were headed was the life we wanted so sorry I asked you to choose me and love me for me instead of love me for what I had or didn't have. I'm sorry I needed to do this or even felt like I needed to do this cuz I will always love you no matter what, But now my life is going to be for me and for me only for its remainder because you gave up the fight and I ended it.

I think it’s necessary for any opinionated person to constantly question if they’re correct, and I go into every argument prepared to be wrong. Every new piece of evidence creates inside me the sense that my entire world might be turned upside down by a new fact. That I might be proven so wrong that I have to completely abandon my beliefs and concede that perhaps my evangelism has been misguided….
But, over and over again, I encounter the exact same kinds of oppositions, and these consistencies tell me we are headed in the right direction. It only gets funnier and funnier seeing fascists get desperate in the exact same ways over and over again lol…they always think they’re being so smart by desperately trying anything to avoid admitting their wrong, but they still feel the need to participate and try to get off some zingers. It’s sad really, but it would be funny if they weren’t trying to take over the country.
I encounter people who make belligerently delirious claims, and when asked for a source, either fall silent or engage in high volume screeching. I ask them over and over again for the source…but nothing.
I encounter people who get to the point they realize they’re wrong, and out of desperation begin making accusations of trolling. It doesn’t matter that they can’t ever point out a single instance of me trolling.
It is incredibly rare to find anyone capable of admitting they’re wrong, and while I have been incorrect and admitted it a few times on this account, I have yet to see anyone on the right give any indication that they are capable of growing, or changing their opinions when presented with new facts. They can be proven objectively wrong by their own sources (which they often only read the title of), but they will still not show any indication of change.
So many other folks just flat out refuse to respond to valid criticism, somehow thinking this means they’re winning. Few things could make them seem more pitiful in my eyes.
Perhaps the most funny is when they start to ask why I’m in their subreddit (aka they need a safe space to protect them from outside opinions). U/RedBaronsBrother, the moderator of Republicans, even says in their community guidelines that outside opinions aren’t allowed because they will “subvert” the opinions of members in that subreddit. They cannot mesh their reality with facts, and they know it, so they have to hide their supporters from us lol.
I have caused these issues more times than I can count in the short few months I’ve had this account.
Carry your doubt with you always, but remember that it is not a weakness. Constantly doubting ourselves is how we can separate ourselves, and prove we are well intended. We can truly demonstrate that our side is the only side truly supporting this country.
A final note: I’ve now been banned from every conservative subreddit there is, so my time for debate has come to an end. I still monitor the far right subs, and I see other people like us in there fighting the good fight. Seeing that we are not alone gives me such hope. I know that we can rally together around truth, and good faith discussion, to fight fascism, and that we will not be alone.

So, I've watched the AITA videos on YouTube all the time, so I thought I would bring a couple of my stories here. (This is a long one, so bear with me.) I tried to post this on another aita page but there were too many rules. I'm sure everyone else has a more interesting story than me. also new here don't know how the app works. so chill on me.
I (19, female) recently moved out of my apartment so I could save for a better one. So, I recently went back to my moms for a bit (40, female) with her husband (35, male). Before I even thought about coming back home, my mom always told me, "Come back home. You can have the room back. Nobody helps me with the dog or clean. We missed you so much; I've been depressed since you've been gone."
Now, before I get to the story, let me give you some background on my (16, female) sister. I'll give her a fake name. Let's call her Nya. My mom would complain about how my sister (27 female), who has custody of my sister, uses my sister's taxes for herself and my niece, and Nya never gets anything. Now, I understand her frustration, but she's a hypocrite. She asked my dad's wife if she could claim me last year. Mind you, I was 18, and if Shes complaining that my sister should've gotten her taxes, then mine should've gone to me, all $5,000 of it, but I didn't trip about it at first. Well, she got me furniture with the taxes after I told her I did not want or need any furniture in my room, so I had stuff I didn't even want when I already had stuff. She told me, "When you move, you can take it." Well, I moved to my boyfriend's mom's house for a couple of months and then got my own apartment. I went to ask if I could get my furniture, and she's going to say, "Oh. Nya sleeps in here when she visits on weekends, and it's set up to be her room." she could've kept my old furniture in storage if she was going to play in my face like that. Nya only visits 8 times out of the whole month unless it's a holiday, no school, or half a day. She could've given me my furniture. I was laying on an old mattress that came from my boyfriend's moms place and it hurt our backs. I was paying so much for rent and just to live that I couldn't afford to get a new one. I really hated Nya because she knew what she was doing. On my birthday, she got gifted more things than I did because she had an attitude. But when it was hers, I didn't get NOTHING. Imagine someone else getting more gifts than you on your own birthday. They had me pierce my own nose at 15, but Nya professionally got hers done. My nose closed up, and we've done this about 6 times, but they got her pierced twice on both sides her nose. When she'd come over, if they'd go out, she'd always ask for something, and if she didn't get her way, she wouldn't speak with my mother or her husband. Almost every time I see her, she has something new that my mom got her. She comes over and uses my mom; she doesn't even hang out with my mom when she's here unless they go out. She hides in the room. And ironically, every time I leave stuff around her, it goes missing. She would steal stuff from my mom too, and the whole time, it would be something of mine that my mom was holding onto for me. Over $300 worth of stuff she's stolen or got CAUGHT stealing. She's able to call my mom a (b word), but I was told, "You can cuss; just don't ever call me a (b word)." Like my sister basically owns her at this point. You might've already seen where this was going.
My mom called me the day I was packing, which was literally Tuesday. It's been no more than 4-5 days, and it's already been so much drama. She had an attitude like she was surprised I was coming back, but me and her spoke several times the month before about it. She swore up, down, left, and right that it was okay. Silly me for thinking my mother, of all people, could be relied on. Well, she picks me up and complains how I had too many bags (it was 5 black bags and like 5 tiny grocery bags. My boyfriend had most of the other stuff, including big furniture that he was taking with his mom because she has a house. my mom has an apartment). I'm not surprised she was complaining; it's all she does. She said she didn't know what to do with the room yet because she "didn't want to pick favorites." The craziest part was Nya herself said I can stay in here and remember that its important.
She waited till about 9 o'clock PM to tell me that I could sleep in there. Now I had several bags, and they would've cried if they were all in the living room, so I took them in the room, but by now, you can probably tell nothing pleases them. A1 complainers. Well, everything was fine at first until my older sister texted me Friday night and said, 'Mom and Nya don't know how to tell you ONCE AGAIN that they don't want you in that room. I'm not trying to start drama; I just want you to know they said you moved Nya's stuff and threw it on the floor.' This did, however, create drama. Also, what does she mean by 'AGAIN'? And I didn't throw a THING on that floor. My sister literally didn't sleep the whole time because she was so ever so sick that I was in here relaxing with my man who came to visit. So, I did text my mom how I felt, and I told her about how she gets everything, but she wants to say 'bull they say you were the princess' when I was like freaking 5, yeah. What have you really done but make me feel less than the other? So comes morning, and her husband came banging on the door telling me to unlock it (the door was already unlocked. Get a load of this guy.), and I'm GROWN; this man really came at me sideways talking about 'get the f in the living room.' Mind you, I have a past with anxiety; I will faint, and they know this. I don't like arguing. I said, 'No, I'm leaving.' Now I didn't know where I was going to go yet because my boyfriend's mom has all 6 of her kids in the house right now with no space. So I had to call my Poppop the WHOLE time my stepfather would not shut up. (Ohh, brother, this guy stinks.) My mom wouldn't stop screaming, and I got stressed and screamed to just stop, and I started crying because of course, I have anxiety and I'm overwhelmed because its 3 people yelling over something they said i could do. My chest was tight, and I was shaking. Then my mom really had the audacity to tell Nya, 'She don't want u in here because she said u stole.' I told my mom to keep that private. My sister was stealing my underwear, and I told her (funny because I literally JUST bought her some clothes and underwear). I asked her to keep it between us. Oh boy, I won't tell her NOTHING again. I forgot she got a fat mouth. Anyways, I called my grandpa, and I'm his baby, so how could he ever say no? He's the only one that ever cares for me anymore. I felt bad because my mom started crying, so I said, 'I'll be back tomorrow it's ok.' Stupid, I know. Because she didn't care when I was crying and using the inhaler trying to get air.
And might I add, my sister said 'no what did I steal. She can come say it to my face.' I wanted to knock her socks off. She literally left to go to a friend's because I was in the room after she said I could be in there. That should tell you she didn't come to hang out with mom. Everything about her makes me mad. She does stuff that I do, and she thinks I don't notice. She took my style, even my personality, and my interests. Like I'm a hello kitty girl. I wear hello kitty pants, Kuromi bookbags, and just hello kitty anything including my decor. And I paint so I have hello kitty paintings (I'm good at it too), and she happened to all of a sudden like it too. My hairstyles are unique; I do my own thing. She tries to do her hair like mine. All the TV shows and YouTubers I watch, she started all of a sudden liking. At first, it was cute; I thought she looked up to me. Until I realized she's just trying to BE ME, and she doesn't even like me. Anyways, I went to my Poppop and my Nanas, and my mom tried to guilt trip me on Facebook, and I told them everything that happened, and they agree with me that my mom is being unfair, considering I will be there for about 30 days and my sister only 8 times out of the month. I told my mother that now my sister won't be comfortable coming here because she doesn't know how to just shut up and just be a mother. My nana said it was so immature to really tell Facebook that we 'hate' her. Also, can I add that I've only been here 4 days because I went to my Poppop's last night. Then my mom had the audacity to tell me to keep the room clean when it was a mess. Then when I went to clean it, she told me to leave the stuff there. My sister didn't have it clean; it was a mess. I moved out this little fireplace and 2 blankets, and that's literally what they were mad about. Excuse me for cleaning your brown smoked out and molded walls and provided more space. Excuse me for cleaning the bedding that had cat fur all over it because I couldn't breathe. Cry a river.
so aita?

So, before I start, races in GTA Online are actually good. The races themselves, 99% of the ones I've played are really good, but I feel the experience, at least these days, is just terrible. Let's dive into it, but keep it short.
Now, in most to all races I play, I don't actually do horrible, BUT, those who do, or don't do great just leave. It feels like if players aren't in the top 5 (depending on race/lobby size), they leave. And I don't blame them. I've fallen behind on a race before, and catching up is near impossible. So...finish out the race with no chance of catching up for a higher placement/reward or leave for a better race? Well, the leave option is just better, especially to not waste your own time. So, it just creates this HORRIBLE experience where lobbies just decrease overtime till it's like 5 or 3 people.
ESPECIALLY in destroy last place races, which, I'm not gonna lie, is just dumb. It can be funny with friends, but in a public lobby with randos, that lobby is just gonna decrease and decrease. I personally would never play one of those lobbies, since, as I mentioned, if you get far enough behind, you lose by default.
Lastly, and this is more of a personal problem....I feel I like no contact races better. Idk. It feels like that relies 100% on driving skill, rather than your ability to just hit others and screw others over, and make their experience less fun, and, again, if you get far enough behind, you'll or people will just leave.
Idk. I can swear it hasn't ALWAYS been this way, but I've just felt this over the past few years. I mean hell, I was in first place in a race I was JUST playing, and I just left, since it was just a lobby of 3, and the other two were light years behind. It just didn't feel fun.
PS. I understand and do find entertainment out of contact races, since it can be funny craziness, but sometimes it can be very annoying when hitting everyone becomes one vengeful sprits mission.
Let me know what you think and your thoughts? Obviously this is subjective, if you have fun in races, no problem with that. Hell, even I still do. This is just something I've noticed that's become a big problem.
EDIT: I did notice my title for this post is a bit harsh. It doesn't suck. It's just become a bit of a mess, that's become...a little unfun, and seems to have a harder time retaining players.

Sorry if this is a bit disjointed and long, there's a TL;DR at the end. I just had my LEEP on Thursday and wanted to share my experience. Hopefully this soothes a fellow over-thinker.
Background: 30 yr old female, 130 lbs, 5'2". No moderate, severe or chronic health conditions.
I was diagnosed with high-risk (HR) HPV with LSIL/abnormal cells in February of this year. Not 16/18, but another HR strain. I got at least one shot of the HPV vaccine before I turned 26 so I was really shocked at this. I had a complete emotional breakdown because of the connection to HPV and cervical cancer, plus I just felt....dirty. I've gone through my sexually active years without getting as much as a yeast infection, and now I had just been hit with an STI, and the one that causes cancer. I went into a pretty deep depression and honestly I'm still in that depression zone but not nearly as much. I did a ton of research and my findings told me that even if it was cancer, it's one of the most curable ones especially given my age, health, etc.
My primary doctor referred me to a gyno's office connected to the hospital I go to, and I scheduled an appointment for March 1st. Gyno (who was actually not an OBGYN but an APRN/midwife?) basically did a slightly more advanced exam/questionnaire then I got another referral to an actual OBGYN for a colposcopy and scheduled it for April 1st. I thought I would have the colpo/biopsy with the APRN during my March appointment but I guess that's just a "yeah your primary is right you need a colpo" step. Idk, very confusing.
April 1st comes, the doctor that was available for that date (I wanted to get this done asap) had some less than favorable reviews on the internet so that made me a little uneasy. Between each appointment I was spending hours researching, redditing, googling, youtubing etc. so I wouldn't go into this completely ignorant and hopefully minimize the chance of any BS being pulled.
My doctor was, to my surprise, very chill, professional and knowledgeable. Took time to answer all my questions, we even had some laughs. Please ladies, find a doctor that makes you feel comfortable if you can. No question is a silly question and no doctor or nurse should make you feel like you're stupid for raising concerns or asking a lot of questions. If you feel something is off or a doc is being an a-hole, that's your sign to GTFO and find another doctor. Pleasant staff make this experience so much better.
The colpo: wasn't that bad. They crack you open like a pistachio with a speculum (like they would use for pap smear) and take a look at your cervix with this scope. A vinegar solution is applied to highlight the abnormal cells. My doc's colpo machine did have a screen that could show me what he was seeing, although it wasn't working and honestly I'm glad. I think seeing what was going on inside of me would make me worry more. So I just had to take my doctor's word for it when he said the area of abnormal cells was small.
I had a punch biopsy done during my colpo and oh man. It hurt. I wasn't instructed to take ibuprofen beforehand. I'm not sure if they didn't think I would need a biopsy or what but holy crap. 2 samples were taken, at 12 o'clock and 6 o'clock on my cervix, and I received a curettage as well. The curettage didn't hurt or was minor in comparison to the biopsy. After the biopsy, a "liquid bandage" was applied, this bandage is called Monsel's solution I believe. It's a mustard yellow paste.
The biopsy caused immediate moderate cramping and pain. The "6 o'clock" one, which was a larger sample, made me flinch and let out a little yelp. 6 o'clock hurt a lot. I will say that my doctor talked about what he was going to do before doing or as he was doing it so it's not like I was taken entirely by surprise. However, you don't realize how sensitive your cervix is until a chunk is taken from it.
After the biopsy, I felt this dull pain, nausea and cramping and apparently had excessive bleeding. Dribbles of blood were present on the procedure chair and floor, some of which had been cleaned up by the nurse/assistant prior to me sitting up so who knows how much was there. Doc confirmed this excessive bleeding in my after visit summary, but it wasn't so much so that it warranted some kind of emergency. I experienced some spotting for about 2 to 3 days after. I expected more blood in my pads but that never happened. I think seeing all this blood, knowing where it came from and why it was there made me even more nauseous.
The nausea and...weakness after the biopsy really had me messed up. I could barely focus as my doctor went into detail about what to possibly expect afterwards, what he saw (he even drew a little picture of my cervix), answered any questions I had. We said our goodbyes, I got dressed and made a mad dash to the waiting area's water cooler. I figured some cool water would calm my nerves and my stomach. I stupidly walked home after the procedure (I live in Chicago, very close to my doc's office). Nothing terrible happened but in hindsight, what if I passed out in the office, in the street? If you can ladies, have someone with you to get you home safely and for support. Or, at the very least, take an uber after.
After getting home I checked my pad, everything was good although I did have some "coffee grounds" in my pad from the Monsel's solution. The doc warned me about this and to expect it for a few days. I crashed on my couch for a little nap before going to a concert later that evening because I don't know how to take a day off.
The next month following my biopsy was largely uneventful, I did have intercourse about 2.5 weeks post-biopsy with no issues or pain, although the thought of infection and the whole process made it hard to enjoy sex (I healed up just fine so this was more unnecessary worrying). I didn't experience any pain, fever, or excessive bleeding, only some mild discomfort/cramping/lethargy (likely due to mentally stressing myself out) on day 2. I did however, experience one moment that freaked me out:
Day 3 post-biopsy: I got home from after work (my job requires me to be on my feet most of the day) and felt something in my vagina. It felt like a freshly inserted, regular sized tampon. I went to the bathroom, washed my hands and reached down to feel something coming out of me. Something was crowning and breaching my labial gates. I reached back down and slowly pulled out whatever object was in me. It felt like a horror movie. I knew I had inserted nothing.
Based on the feeling of said object, I thought my cervix was falling out of my body. I started panicking a bit. Panicking intensified after pulling out this...sac.
It looked alien. It was this membrane sac, about the size of a pitted date when rolled up. Within the sac contained those "coffee grounds." I knew it was the Monsel's solution and likely I had shed the liquid bandage. That logical thought didn't stop me from freaking out and gently wrapping my alien sac Starbucks trash baby in a piece of toilet paper and further sealing this HPV caused abomination into a Ziploc bag. My plan was to run to the ER and show them the freak I had given birth to.
Problem is, I had just lost my is insurance and was in process of getting a new plan, so a costly trip to the ER, waiting for hours for them to likely tell me I'm a panicky idiot wasn't really in the cards. So what does any overly anxious patient do? Turn to Dr. Google of course! I found a couple of reddit posts from women who had experienced the same thing but there wasn't much information on what had just slithered out of me. I found one of those "pay $5 for any kind of advice: legal, medical etc! Chat with an expert today!" sites that seemed legit enough. I got in chat with a doc quickly after some AI pre-chat prompts and he confirmed my suspicions: it was the Monsel's solution that I had expelled from my body. I was told this wasn't unusual and so long as I don't have an excessive bleeding, fever, pain, blah blah, I should be fine.
And I was fine. If you experience this and don't have any accompanying complications, you should be fine too. It is weird when it happens though.
My results came back about 2 weeks later. What was initially thought to be LSIL turned out to be HSIL/CIN-III, and my OBGYN told me I needed a LEEP sooner than later. My appointment was scheduled for next month and I still didn't have insurance. These month long waits between appointments were anxiety ridden depression fests, fueled by junk food and further exacerbated by internet research. The LEEP posts on Reddit had me so concerned, I reached out to my doctor to see if I could be put under general anesthesia for my LEEP, instead of receiving local anesthesia. Women on here described LEEPs as painful and traumatic. Just awful stuff. If you're reading this you've likely read those too. They described leg shaking after the shots, crying, etc. My doctor left me a detailed voice message and responded to my concerns with: "most women tolerate it well but if you're uncomfortable we'll send you to the hospital and put you under monitored sedation/anesthesia." I was still worried but was willing to see how I felt after local anesthesia. I was pleased he was open to working with me and my comfort level.
Fast forward to Wednesday last week:
The night before my LEEP, I got maybe an hour of sleep. I couldn't turn my mind off. My heart started racing an hour before my procedure and I had weird heart palpitations/irregular heart beat. I showered to calm myself down and be clean for my appointment, took 600 mg of ibuprofen as instructed, then headed out. Got a little snack from Starbucks (croissant for before since I was walking to my doc and some madeleines for after to help offset some potential nausea). For my LEEP I wore a big comfy sweater, some "period" leggings (leggings that aren't too tight and I don't care if they get blood on them) and brought a pad with me just in case. They should provide one for you but I'd rather be prepared. Got to the office, checked in, did the pregnancy urine test, got called in quickly, went through the whole height/weight/med history routine. About 5 mins later I sat down in my OBGYN's office. He described the lab findings (CIN-III), detailed the procedure, the tools and supplies they would use, aftercare and answered any questions I had. He then led me into a procedure room (pretty sure it was the same one I had my bloody biopsy in). I got undressed from the waist down like a pap, sat in the procedure chair, draped a little paper blanket over my bare bits and waited. The doctor came in with his nurse and went to work.
They again cracked me open with a speculum, this time it was rubberized on some parts. This is so your vagina doesn't get fried from the electrical current, otherwise your pubes and vulva will look like Marv in Home Alone. They also slapped a little rubber pad on my thigh to "ground" me like I'm some kind heavy duty machinery. Colpo machine comes forward so the doc can zoom in on your cervix. He applied 2 types of solution if I recall correctly: the normal vinegar solution to highlight abnormal cells and an iodine solution to highlight normal cells. Someone can correct me if that's wrong. The solutions and their uses were the least of my concerns.
He then went in with 4 lidocaine injections to numb the area, total of about 1 ml of lido I think. He used a very small needle and upon insertion, it felt like a little pinch. Now, for those afraid of needles, it is a long ish needle but the actual poke is minimal. Although some women report that the inject was the worst part. That was not the case here but the visual can be a bit alarming. After the first injection, I didn't feel the other 3. I felt comfortable going forward with the procedure, and my doc kept checking in with me to make sure I was ok. I did feel an increase in my heart rate post-lidocaine, but it wasn't concerning. I wasn't sure if this was from the "holy shit he's about to start zapping" or as a side effect of the lidocaine. Regardless, my heart rate came back down to a reasonable level given the circumstances in a few minutes. I was actually so comfortable at this point, I managed to relax my asscheeks after they were clamped together like a vise grip from the moment my derriere hit the chair.
I'm not really sure what happened after the injections, I knew he was using the LEEP machine but I don't know how long that lasted and when the wound was being created vs. cauterized as I didn't feel anything except some mild cramping/discomfort. I didn't flinch like I did with the biopsy. When the doc was finished, he applied a little bit of Monsel's, described how much he removed, went over aftercare again, we said our thank yous and goodbyes. I got dressed and went on my way, snacking on my madeleines on my way home (I walked again lol). I felt well post-procedure and even stopped at Target to do some shopping and smell some summer collection candles. I did feel myself bleeding but when I got home and checked the pad, there was a minimal amount of blood. Some women here have reported a distinct burning smell during their LEEP, I didn't smell anything but I also have sinus issues soooo maybe I just didn't pick up on it? My appointment was at 9 a.m. and I was out by 9:32.
When I got home I had some orange juice, water then slept for about 8 to 9 hours. I did have little cry sessions here and there after my procedure. But I was also sleep deprived and know I tend to get emotional. Regardless, take some time off after a LEEP, stay home around your own germs if possible. Get some of your favorite snacks, a face mask and a Nintendo switch or something. This is a good time for some self-care and rest, girlies.
Friday, day after LEEP: no bleeding, minor cramping/discomfort.
Saturday: Usual morning pee met with some blood in the toilet paper. Nothing in my pad though. Throughout the day I slept on and off, I've been more tired than usual. My body and mind has gone through some shit so I'm not mad at myself for being sleepy. I did experience some heavier bleeding throughout the day that was mostly dark colored. The blood level was about the same if not less than what I'd experience with a period. No unusual smell. I did shed the liquid bandage. Did have some mild cramping at certain points during the day but not debilitating or worth taking ibuprofen over.
Sunday: Energy levels finally back up to something normal, don't feel as tired. Still bleeding dark red blood/brown discharge but it's minor. Ran some errands today, I figured gravity would cause me to bleed more but it's about the same as yesterday if not less.
If there's interest, I'll check in at maybe the 2 week and 4 week mark, or whenever I remember since this is my throwaway account.
Overall the LEEP was way better than the biopsy in my experience. Reddit had me freaking out. I know I'm lucky, and this post isn't to dismiss any terrible or painful experience other women have had. I want to share my 'positive' experience, since most of my mental state surrounding my diagnosis, fears, the upgrade from LSIL to HSIL, has been negative.
Oh and I did get insurance literally a week before my LEEP, thank God.
If you have any questions please feel free to ask them below!
TL;DR: -Colpo: easy -Biopsy: sucks. Most pain I've ever felt and felt nauseous/uneasy after. Ask your doctor if you can take ibuprofen prior to a biopsy. Monsel's solution/liquid bandaid came out in sac-like alien baby about 36 to 48 hours later. Was able to have intercourse 2-2.5 weeks post-biopsy. No insertion of anything for about 3 days after. -LEEP: easy-ish? 600 mg ibuprofen 1 hour before procedure. Anxiety inducing but once I was numbed with local anesthesia, I felt nothing except some mild cramping. The injection didn't hurt and caused no serious side effects. No smell. No excessive bleeding. Felt fine post-LEEP but did experience some bleeding. It's been less than a week so I'll update if anything spooky happens, if no updates then expect everything went fine. No intercourse/tampons/etc for 3 to 6 weeks.
Tips: -Prioritize self care throughout this experience especially. It'll help you stay calm and heal. -Dress comfy for procedures -Take some snacks and water to your appointments for post-procedure ick -Do your research. Knowledge is power even if it makes you uncomfortable. Youtube was a great resource for me, I like to see what's going to happen before it does. Just try not to get worked up like I did. -Ask questions. If a doctor makes you feel stupid, see another doctor if possible. -Have someone with you for support and to make sure you get home ok -If you experience fever, intense pain, soaking through pads, or notice any weird smell: GO TO A DOCTOR

Throwaway as the point of this post is not to brag but to share a source of anxiety I faced in the hopes this helps someone. I have never struggled with mental health issues in my life, until a month and a half before spring exams. Despite good fall grades and a good 1L summer offer, I was filled with extreme doubt. I was not fun to be around, nor could I relax when not doing law school. I sought out mental health support and was put on a temporary prescription for anxiety and it helped me a lot. However, going into my con law final, I really felt unprepared. I had read the cases, participated in class, and created my own outline. But every day I studied, I felt more and more unprepared for the exam. I went to office hours which helped to a degree, but often added to the feeling of uncertainty. I read supplements which again made me feel like I didn’t know anything. Then I took the exam. It went fine, nothing special. Today I got an email that I got the top grade in the class.
My reason for making this post is to parrot some advice from my professor that I did not initially believe but now do after receiving the grade. Often times, increased studying yields increased uncertainty. It is generally not too bad to understand what the cases generally stand for, and the general principles the court looks to. However, when you really try to get in the weeds of it all, whether by reading supplements or otherwise, things get more complicated. My point is that a feeling of uncertainty going into an exam is not always a bad thing. The more you study, the more you realize how squishy concepts are and how complicated the doctrine really is. This is not to say to take your foot off the gas, but to give yourself a break on the things you don’t quite understand. Had I done that, I think I would have had a much healthier relationship with school this semester. Obviously results may vary, but I would be interested to hear others take on this and whether others have found that increased studying yields increased confusion.

First
Auraxium Captain Nikto Rakzes POV
Those traitors think they can hide from us in the old home system of the Elyrian? I’ll show them what happens when they cross Captain Nikto Rakzes! Nobody pulls one over on me and gets away with it. I mean how did I honestly believe that they were courier runners? Yes, they had the necessary paperwork, so I had to go by the books and let them go. But once they strayed from their route their fate was sealed. These three shall rue the day they thought they could escape the great Nikto Rakzes!
Crew of the Scav POV
“No weapons, that’s fine we can still manage. Little one I never got your name by the way.” Asked Tic-Tac from the speakers all around the room.
“My name is Lizra, Captain Lizra Riteness the Third to be exact.”
“Adorable, ok Captain Lizra, how sure are you that these ones incoming are hostile?”
“I'm Fairly certain. I just didn’t think that they would be so suspicious of us as to follow us here.”
“Well we did lie to them and pretend to be galactic couriers. And that dumbass bought every word of it too” Chucked Argall.
“Argall language. We are Tic-Tac's esteemed guests here.”
“No worries little one. That's ok, I think I have a plan that may get us all out of here. I can completely stabilize the atmosphere within the facility and then when they enter I will be able to jettison them from the airlocks. Do you think that might buy us enough time to get to your vessel?”
“We’re not going to fight them ourselves? The whole reason I was sent with you was to carry this weapon back! I was hoping to get to use it at least. But now I can’t even do that since the weapon is a fucking guy.” Complained Argall, annoyed that there still hadn’t been a confrontation that required his expertise.
“Don’t worry Induran, if they manage to stick around after we show them the door, we may have use for you yet. And your name is?”
“Argall” He grumbled, still disappointed there was no ancient weapon of destruction he could wield like some god of war.
“Argall what?” Questioned Tic-tac confused.
“Just Argall”
“Appropriate. They should be arriving any second now. I am going to go ahead and remove the atmosphere from this room so that we do not have to worry about pressure equalization when we make our move. Z-8 do you have any way to remotely pilot your ship from here?”
“We do not even need to inquire as to how you know our name, but please call us Zate from this point forward. Yes we have the ability to control the ship remotely. What do you have in mind Program?”
“I can see from the security feeds they are going to station their ship near yours. I will forward you the location of where to move your ship once I eject the intruders. I am going to illuminate the path to another exit, for you to move to. Once there I’ll pressurize the door, open the airlock, and throw you into space.”
“You’re going to do what with us!? I do not consent to being blasted into the cosmos Mr. Tic-Tac.” Replied Lizra clutching onto Argall even tighter.
“Captain, the claws”
“Yes my apologies Argall”
“Do not worry. If Zate gets the ship in position you will be propelled right into the loading bay or your vessel. When I was connected to Zate I was able to view the schematic of your ship. I will send her a visual representation of how to orient it to properly recieve you.” Tic-Tac replied matter of factly.
“Not necessary, we can visualize that without your aid computer.”
While the plan was being created the Human sat silently watching them. Throughout the entire conversation he hadn’t taken his eyes off of the small Elyrian captain in the room. His masked helmet gave away no signs as to how he felt towards the plan, or other occupants in the room. Lizra hopped down from atop Argall and made her way over to Human looking up at him. When standing on her hind legs she barely came up to his knees.
“Um, Mr Human, do you have anything to add to the plan?”
“No.”
“Will you defend us if it comes to that?”
“Yea sure…and I’m sorry.”
“Sorry? For what exactly?”
“Just that-”
As Lizra and Human were locked in their engrossing dialogue, a loud bang echoed throughout the facility that shook the walls of the research room. The trio jumped into action and gathered around the exit door as Human walked over to the small black box looking down at it.
“Just lemme know when Tic-Tac.”
“Disconnect me only when they get to safety. Any earlier and I will not have access to the facility.”
“You aren’t coming with us?” Asked Lizra looking down at the little black computer.
“We will be following shortly, I have to ensure your safe exit. We also have a few more items to grab before we make our leave.” A second later an explosion was heard down the hall, followed by a booming voice that echoed throught the base.
“This is Auraxium Captain Nikto Rakzes of The Prowler. You are in violation of Core federal code 13-7451 impersonating a galactic courier and attempting to flee from federal authorities. Cooperate and you will be handled respectfully. If you refuse to do so then you shall face severe repercussions. Such as a fine upwards of 10,000 credits. That will be all.”
“He seems to be in a better mood today,” Lizra chuckled.
“Oh we’ll see if he’s still threatening us with a fine when I threaten him with his own spine.”
Argall grunted putting his fists together.
“Ok Zate get the ship moving, I’m opening the airlocks now. Good luck everyone, see you soon.”
When Tic-Tac finished his farewell, the sounds of air rushing out of the facility sounded from the other side of the door. It opened up moments later and the three rushed out into the hall. They followed the blinking lights that guided them through the corridors. Upon reaching the exit they made their way into the small airlock and the door sealed behind them.
“7 seconds and we will have the ship in position. We hope Tic-Tac does not send us out too e-” Zate was cut off as the opposite door opened and plunged the trio untethered out into the stars. Outside they could see countless others flailing around in the vacuum of space, having also been unexpectedly jettisoned from the base. Lizra locked her eyes onto the ship and saw it on an interception course with them. Their trajectory was impeccable, sending them right into the open loading bay. Argall grabbed the small captain and wrapped his bulk around her to shield her from the impact. The three were thrown into the ship with the blast door slamming shut behind them.
“Wait, what about Human and Tic-Tac?” Lizra asked squirming free of Argall grip.
“We have established comms with Tic-Tac again, he says not to worry and to prepare for departure.” Zate said, picking themselves up off the floor.
“Right, lets get out of here before those Core clowns get their bearings again.”
“What? No, thank you Argall for saving me? No, Oh Argall are you hurt from taking that fall for me?”
“You’re expected to save your captain Argall, we need to focus on saving Human and Tic-Tac right now.”
“No problem, you're welcome captain, yes i'm fine, thank you for asking.”
Once back in the command room of The Scav they surveyed the situation. The majority of The Prowler’s crew was still floating around aimlessly outside. The Prowler itself had started moving away from the landing pads, bearing down on The Scav.
“Captain weapons lock detected. They are directing us to stand down and not to flee.”
“Or what? We get another fine?”
“We believe they might not tell us again.”
As the two ships faced off, Lizra was debating whether to give the order to make a slipspace jump or to surrender. Before she could make up her mind, she saw the form of Human launching himself from the facility below. He was not headed for The Scav, but instead towards The Prowler.
“Quick Zate tell him that’s not our ship! That's the ones that came here to attack us!”
“We believe he knows that.”
“Then what is he doing? Is he betraying us? And here I thought he was just warming up to me.”
Human was silhouetted against the bright red hull of the Prowler as he made contact with it and latched on. He launched himself from the side of the ship making a beeline for the front. Once there he dug his hands into the metal walls, climbing towards the windows of The Prowler’s bridge. Human stared into the bridge of The Prowler before raising an arm and shattering the glass of the viewport and throwing himself inside. A few stray plasma shots could be seen exiting the bridge before the ship’s metal shutters slammed shut in an attempt to stop the atmosphere from escaping.
“Remind me to ask Human to show me how to punch like that.”
“Captain weapons are no longer locked. Should we start a slipspace jump?”
“Yes, go for slipspace, seatbelts everyone! Zate open the cargo bay again.”
A minute later the metal shutters were torn open from the inside and Human jumped from the ruins of The Prowler's bridge towards The Scav. The Scav moved closer to intercept, and Zate oriented the ship to receive him in the open bay. Once Human was safely aboard, the cargo bay was closed and Zate initiated the slipspace jump. Once away from danger the crew gave a sigh of relief, Lizra unbuckling herself from her pedestal and surveyed the monitors.
“Well I’d like to see them give us that fine now. Great work everyone. And Argall? Thank you for shielding me earlier, it looked like it hurt.”
“Of course captain you’re welcome. And I’m fine thank you.”
“Oh come now, I was being genuine. I appreciate your initiative to keep me safe. I’ll put you in for some sort of medal when we return.”
“Nah I don’t need a medal. I just wanna actually do my job when it doesn’t involve moving around cargo.”
“Well then, shall we go greet Human and Tic-Tac then? I believe a thanks is in order.”
“We will stay here and notify you when we are clear of the system. Ensure Tic-Tac will not meddle with our systems again or he might find himself being the one jettisoned from an airlock.”
“Duly noted Zate, keep us on course and notify me of any updates.”
Lizra and Argall shed their environmental suits and made their way down into the cargo bay to see if Human was ok. When they arrived, there was a dent in the far wall, presumable from when they made the jump and Human wasn't properaly fastened in. He was wearing the small black box from the computer room on his back, and unlike before had a strange looking rifle in his hand.
“Ah that’s new, its a good look for you two. We’re not in space anymore so you don’t have to wear your suit around here when we're in transit.”
“I’m fine, thanks.” Human replied curtly.
Tic-Tac’s voice echoed from the black box attached to humans back, “Unfortunately he has no way of removing the suit here either way. We would have to construct the proper machines to remove it, as I do not believe they are present in this… galaxy." Tic-Tac said searching for the proper word. "But he hasn’t been out of it in a very long time, I assure you it’s not a burden to him.”
“Right, well thank you for saving us back there. So did you… um kill them all?”
“No, we merely disabled their systems on the bridge. They’re going to be stuck there for quite a while until someone can give them a ride. We have decided to accompany you to the nearest port where we can acquire our own ship and then we shall be on our way.” Tic-Tac responded.
“Wait wait wait, we went through all the trouble of getting you out of there, helped you bring Human back, and now you want to leave us already?”
“We have no desire to get involved in another conflict after having it be our sole purpose for as long as we can remember. I hope you can understand why we wish to make our own choices now.”
“Okay hold on, we helped you get off the base, and helped you wake up Human. So maybe you could at least come with us back home and hear us out. From someone a little more charismatic than myself.”
“Very well, how long until we arrive?”
“Um, maybe a week?”
“Terrific. Well maybe we can pass the time by telling me how you came to learn of us, and more about who you’re fighting. I only speak for myself saying I would love to know more. It really has been a long time since I’ve had a good conversation with someone that's not a part of myself.”
“Of course, here let me show you to the common room, you two can stay there until we make a stop.” Lizra led them to a large room in the center of the ship, adorned with various different chairs for the different species on board. She took the seat that was present for her, a round flat bed where she was able to curl up and use her long tail as a pillow. Human took off the black box that was Tic-tac and dropped it onto the table in the middle.
“Enjoy.” He spoke before leaving the room. Argall followed closely behind Human and Lizra only picked up the beginning of his sentence, asking about how he was able to break into the ship like that.
“Is he always this… charming?”
“He isn’t the nicest, you don't have to sidestep it. We have been through a lot. I’d like to tell you more, but I do not want to make him any angrier with me than he already is. He’s been through more than I could possibly begin to explain.
“Well I hope he ends up doing better. Maybe we can find a beach for him when we make a stop, I remember him mentioning that.”
“I’m sure he would appreciate that.”
“You know, I have been thinking about something rather peculiar he said to me when we were in your computer room.”
“And what might that be?”
“He apologized to me, but he hadn’t done anything that warranted an apology at the time.”
Tic-Tac was silent for a moment before speaking, “He has been trapped in his own head for quite some time. I would not dwell on anything strange he says. 909 is a man of few words, and does not come from a world that places social interactions in their list of their priorities.”
Lizra was quiet for a moment, feeling as if there was more Tic-Tac had wanted to say but decided not to. Before she could press further, the black box spoke again. “So, who is this Core you mentioned back there?”
“Oh my where to begin with that one. I guess my own species’ story would be a good place to start. About 1000 years ago we were nearly brought to complete extinction…”

Exploring CSS Compatibility in Gmail Clients

When designing email campaigns, understanding the constraints imposed by email clients like Gmail is crucial for ensuring your message is delivered as intended. Gmail, being one of the most widely used email services, has specific rules regarding the CSS properties it supports. This can significantly impact the visual presentation of your emails, potentially affecting user engagement and the overall success of your campaign. Designers often face the challenge of balancing creativity with the technical limitations of email clients, making knowledge of these constraints essential for effective email marketing.
The intricacies of Gmail's CSS support involve a combination of allowed and stripped attributes, which dictates how styles are applied to your email content. The variation in support across different email clients and even within Gmail's own ecosystem—spanning web and mobile applications—complicates the design process further. This introduction to Gmail's CSS compatibility aims to shed light on these limitations, offering insights and strategies to navigate through the challenges of email design, ensuring that your emails not only reach their intended recipients but also display as intended, regardless of the client used to view them.

Command	Description
u/media query	Used to apply CSS styles for different devices and screen sizes, but limited in support by Gmail.
!important	Increases the priority of a CSS property, but Gmail ignores these declarations.
Class and ID selectors	Allows styling of specific elements, but Gmail predominantly supports inline styles over external or internal stylesheets.

Navigating CSS Restrictions in Gmail

Email marketers and designers often encounter significant challenges when creating campaigns intended for Gmail users, primarily due to Gmail's handling of CSS. Unlike web browsers that typically support a wide range of CSS properties and selectors, Gmail strips out certain CSS attributes to maintain its own standards of email presentation and security. This includes, but is not limited to, complex selectors, styles defined in tags, and the use of !important declarations. As a result, email designs that rely heavily on these features for layout and styling may not appear as intended in the recipient's inbox, leading to potential issues with readability, engagement, and overall effectiveness of the email campaign.
To effectively work within these limitations, it is essential for designers to adopt Gmail-friendly CSS practices. This includes the use of inline CSS for critical styling, as Gmail is more likely to preserve these styles. Additionally, understanding and utilizing CSS properties that Gmail does support can help in creating responsive and visually appealing emails. For example, employing table-based layouts and inline CSS can enhance compatibility across Gmail's web and mobile clients. By prioritizing simplicity in design and coding, and rigorously testing emails across different clients, marketers can create effective, engaging email campaigns that look great in Gmail, ensuring their message is communicated clearly and effectively to their audience.

Adjusting Email Design for Gmail Compatibility

Email Design Strategy

 
 
 
Example Content
 
 
 Inline styles for better Gmail support 
 
 
Example Content
 
 
 

Navigating CSS Restrictions in Gmail

Email marketing remains a vital communication tool, with design playing a key role in engaging the recipient. However, when it comes to designing emails for Gmail, one of the largest email platforms, there are unique challenges. Gmail strips certain CSS properties to maintain a consistent user experience and to protect against potentially malicious code. This means that email designers must be adept at navigating these restrictions to ensure their emails look as intended across all devices. Understanding which CSS properties are stripped and which are supported is crucial for this. For instance, Gmail does not support CSS styles contained within the