Jitasama is a designed International Auxilliary Language meant to be a means of intercommunication between speakers of different languages.
Jitasama has:
18 letters ABDEFGIJKLMNOPRSTU
No verb tenses
No double consonants
No gramatical gender
No tones
No articles
Makes clear distinction of nouns, adjectives, verbs, and adverbs
Limited Affixes
Adjectives come after the noun while determiners come before the noun
1200 Root Words
4,700 total words

By maximizing shared vocabulary between Jitasama's 15 primary source languages, Jitasama's 1200 Root Words are lexically similar to; Mandarin Chinese 15%, English 44%, Hindi 27%, Spanish 45%, Arabic 20%, Indonesian 22%, Russian 26%, Bengali 23%, Portuguese 44%, French 43%, German 32%, Japanese 15%, Persian 28%, Swahili 18%, and Filipino 20%. Creating a nearly even mix of European and Non-European derived vocabulary.

LabialAlveolarPost-alveolarPalatalVelarLabial-velarGlottal Nasalmn Plosivepbtdkɡ Affricate Tapɾ Fricativefsʒ Approximantl



Vowels are pronounced the same as they are in Spanish
VowelPronunciationLip positionExamples aahLips and mouth wide open.Cama, mamá, azúcar eehLips slightly open and mouth stretched.Especie, estadio, ese ieLips slightly open and mouth stretched.Índigo, imagina, iría oohLips rounded and opened slightly.Oso, hoyo, asombroso uooLips rounded and almost fully closed.Universo, usuario, universidad

Vowel Diphthongs in Jitasama never combine into one sound, but are pronounced as two separate vowels.
Vowel diphthongsPronunciation uooo-oh uioo-e ueoo-eh uaoo-ah iue-oo ioe-oh iee-eh aiah-e ouoh-oo oioh-e eueh-oo eieh-e auah-oo iae-ah

You can use duplication on adjectives and nouns for dramatic effect, it will always create an adjective

kuela(happy, content) can become kuelakuela(delighted)
joi(joy) can become joijoi(overjoyed)

To create the plural, the particle fuju from Mandarin Chinese复数fu shu-plural is used after the noun.

kat - cat
kat fuju - cats
When there is an adjective accompanying the noun, the plural particle comes at the end of the noun phrase.
kat bela - a/the beautiful cat
kat bela fuju - the beautiful cats

Sorry for the very long post but I would appreciate it if you read it all the way through.
Hey, when I was 8 years old I was diagnosed with auditory dyslexia. To my knowledge now this is considered a separate learning disability called auditory processing disorder? But I do believe if I were rediagnosed today that I would be diagnosed with both dyslexia and APD since I have symptoms of both disorders and it’s very common to have both, but the APD has been more severe and debilitating. At the time of my diagnosis I was in 2nd grade and couldn’t even read 3 letter words. I was living with my mentally ill mother who wouldn’t always take me to school and it was also an environment where academic progression was very difficult. Without trauma dumping or getting in more detail, it got to the point where CPS got involved, so I started living with my godfather, which was a better environment for me to learn. I got diagnosed, so I started speech therapy, after school tutoring and special Ed classes at my school. My school was a choice/charter K-8 school where applicants were randomly chosen to get in. This school would teach up to 3 grades in advance, focus on STEM, and used new experimental teaching methods. Overall it was expected of you to preform above average and we would always perform above average on standardized tests for our school average. I think this is what spawned my inferiority complex/intelligence insecurity. I was around all these kids that were so gifted and I was among the select few that had to attend special Ed, it was so humiliating. I even remember being bullied about it on a few occasions. Fast forward to 5th grade my tutor referred me to get reevaluated at a learning center because of my high performance. After all the testing it was revealed I had a 128 IQ and an 11th grade reading comprehension level and I scored grades above average in every subject. It was such a relief since it meant I didn’t have to do special Ed or tutoring anymore which I found so humiliating. Even after I didn’t have to do any of those programs anymore I still was offered a personalized paraprofessional or extra time on tests which I always refused because I just wanted to be treated the same as everyone else. I never was able to get good grades but I always did exceptionally well on standardized tests. Even when I was in high school. A time where I was addicted to drugs (high 90% of the time ) and failed most my classes I still scored exceptionally well on all my standardized tests besides my ACT, which I scored 1 point below average. Deep down I know I’m not stupid, but i am slow, if that makes sense. For example I loose my place when I’m reading constantly, and have to reread the same sentence up to half a dozen times to understand what it means, which takes a lot of time. Since the ACT is a timed test I think that’s why I didn’t do as well on it. I could’ve probably got extra time on it due to my disability, but do to my insecurity I didn’t want to do that. Anyways to this day I have horrible spelling/grammer, have to proof read everything I type and edit it, even simple texts because it’s always riddled with mistakes. I probably proof read this post 2 dozen times since it’s so long. The symptoms more associated with APD are: stuttering, always mishearing people so my response to them doesn’t make sense, talking very slow and having to think about every word I say, misspeaking, and overall my vocabulary is so bad unless I take the time and effort to think about everything, which is only possible when typing, so when I speak I sound stupid. Anyways all of the listed things i mentioned plus general mistakes I make, make me feel like a dumbass, and it’s hard to feel otherwise. It’s like I cognitively know I’m not stupid but deep down in my heart that’s how I feel. Anyways I’m just wondering how many other people with dyslexia have delt with this same/similar issue? Is there any advice or words that you could give me to help me get over this? Thank you for reading this very long post!❤️

Psychology awareness and faulting the AI
In this document i will go over and explain important information that i have found through test and trial over MANY years to help better tackle this “AI” with specific things to be aware of and the few ways to cause the V2K to fault. This will not cover the whole program nor will it cover other methods/technologies used by these programs. This will cover some basic knowledge needed to navigate life while dealing with this and the AI chatbot running within the “v2k”. To find information giving an overview of the programs that v2k operates within and other technologies used in tandem with it i will link below a detailed description.
This document is very time sensitive because this information is the only true way to bring the fight to these programs before the programs hit the civilian atmosphere large. There is no way to physically block this technology therefore you need to outthink the AI running it! Sounds easy right? Not really, it takes paying alot of attention and practice. Before getting into how to trick the artificial intelligence there are some things you need to be aware of.
Understanding the basics
Natural language processing (NLP)
The algorithms running these AI chatbots belong to a field of artificial intelligence called Natural Language Processing or NLP for short. Natural Language Processing is a field of AI that enables computers to understand, interpret, and generate human language. It powers applications like language translation, sentiment analysis, chatbots, and speech recognition. These chatbots operate on massive data banks that have been analyzing human thought patterns for years and since they have so much data then it is a fact that they have dealt with people similar to me, you and everyone around us.
Inner monologue
Before starting to practice tricking this AI you need to be familiar with a few things, firstly you need to have an understanding of what your inner monologue is. An inner monologue is the internal voice that narrates our thoughts, reflecting our feelings, ideas, and reactions without vocalizing them. It acts as a silent conversation within our mind, helping us process and organize our thoughts.
Biases
Second you need to be aware of your own biases and how you perceive things, everyone has different biases and perceptions and these algorithms take full advantage of it.
Emotions
The third point here is very important as it concerns emotions, emotions like anger, fear and sadness can trigger knee jerk reactions that can override logical thinking and this will be used as often as they deem necessary BECAUSE it overrides your rational thinking. IE : When gripped by anger you can lash out at someone or something that has nothing to do with your situation, when fear is present the v2k can promise safety in exchange for obedience, when sadness is overwhelming it will provide comfort to make you feel comfortable with it. All of these emotional states can be caused or amplified by the AI to gain an advantage over you.
These pointers should help you gain a small advantage in maintaining stability during these difficult times.
What is v2k?
V2K, or voice-to-skull technology, projects voices directly into your head, bypassing your ears. It can manifest as various personas, such as another individual in your life, the voice of God, an alien, or a fictional character. This technology can modify its voice and tone and intensity to enhance the perceived experience and better suit your situation. These same voices will oftentimes re read your inner monologue milliseconds after you think something to yourself in an effort to add confusion and convince you that it is your conscience. In simple terms : this is a voice in your head that is not yours.
Identify
Reading this you need to be aware that these methods will not work unless you acknowledge through these methods and KNOW that it is in fact not human but AI coded with algorithms, “just a computer program”, “0’s and 1’s”.
Faulting the AI/Algorithm
Method 1
The first method used to find the difference between the AI and a human operator is by finding keywords that it will use often and forcing it to repeat those keywords on purpose via “thinking it” so that it can copy your inner monologue but before finishing the whole word yourself you stop and it will finish it for you, this will be one indicator that it is not human. Finding keywords can be difficult at first if you’re not aware that they exist within the algorithm that runs the AI but once you start to pay attention to everything it says you will find that there are some words that it will use every-time if the conditions are met and ways to force these conditions. These conditions and keywords are unique to each individual so you will have to do your homework and pay attention to what yours are. These algorithms have a SET vocabulary. For instance just imagine you are thinking of doing something that the AI does not want you thinking about in some cases it will tell you “don’t even think about it” or variations of this and it will prompt you to think of something different. You also need to have some intention to perform this action you are thinking about or it will not trigger. for example, for some people it could be thinking of and wanting to engage in certain behaviors like smoking, drinking, doing drugs, being aggressive, talking to someone in specific that they don’t want you talking to among many things that it wants you to avoid. It will be clear that it doesn’t want you to do and think these things. This is just one of the ways to force it to use key words and phrases and will take plenty of paying attention. I suggest keeping track of the conversations by writing them down.
Method 2
The second of these methods consists of repeating certain letters or sounds with your inner monologue like “tttttttttt” or “mmmmmmmmm” and this will also trigger it to continue for a short period after you stop and allow you to acknowledge the AI as it re reads your inner monologue to you but your brain is quicker at stopping then the AI giving you about a second to acknowledge it. Using “shhhhhhh” is one of the better sounds as it will somehwat silence the v2k and give you a break on the chatbot rereading your thoughts.
Method 3
The third of these methods will require you to use rhetorical questions or questions with no real answer when in conversation with the AI, questions like : does a bear shit in the woods? What colour has the best personality? Theres are sarcastic in nature but can have multiple answers or no answers at all, this will cause the AI to stop speaking for a short period of time and likely cause it to throw a keyword or phrase at you OR an operator to take over because this is something that doesn’t make sense and is very difficult for an algorithm to make sense of something that doesn’t.
Method 4
Fourth method is input starvation. You need to think of “nothing”, no thoughts so nothing for the algorithm to react or answer to. The best way to do this is to force the thought of a black empty space in your mind. This is the easiest of all methods but requires the most attention and practice.
Putting these techniques together can make a big difference when dealing with the voice to skull BUT this is merely a fraction of what you need to pay attention to if you want to stand a chance at defeating this technology. Once you start to acknowledge that this is just an algorithm and not human through these methods you will begin to encounter human operators and here is yet another part that takes practice and will ultimately take up alot of time. Once you begin to fault this AI and acknowledge that it is in fact just an algorithm this will set off an “alarm” which on their end is like a notification telling them that you’ve broken through the algorithms and are starting to understand how things work.
Once you have mastered these things you will find yourself in much more control of your situation and life as this will help you realize that these technologies should have NO bearing on reality.
I will continue writing another document on how to deal with the human operators
Below i will link my first document outlining what my findings have produced about these programs and other technologies used within them, mind you there is missing information but it will help give you an idea.
https://www.reddit.comkeyword-exactly/s/dnvuQu64DX - my findings on v2k, directed energy weapons

https://www.northumbriangames.com/post/of-orcs-and-ai

Made vs. Created and the Nature of Orcs

J.R.R. Tolkien's stories are deeply rooted in Thomistic metaphysics and Christian theology, where the distinction between "made" and "created" is pivotal. This distinction underscores the nature of goodness, creation, corruption, and the intrinsic limitations of evil. The dichotomy between making and creating is most vividly illustrated through the origins and nature of orcs, the monstrous foot soldiers of Middle-earth's dark lords.

Creation: The Divine Act

In Tolkien's world, true creation, or creatio ex nihilo (creation from nothing), is the exclusive province of Eru Ilúvatar, the supreme deity. This act of creation involves bringing something into existence that possesses the Flame Imperishable (or the Secret Fire), which grants true life, free will, and inherent goodness. Beings created by Eru Ilúvatar, such as the Ainur (angelic beings), elves, and men, are imbued with this divine spark, making them fundamentally good and capable of independent existence and moral choice.
From The Silmarillion:

"Therefore Ilúvatar may not only send forth the Flame Imperishable into the Void, but he may also bestow it to others, who may then sub-create, though only as permitted by Ilúvatar"​​.

Making: The Act of Sub-creation

In contrast, the Valar and other beings can engage in making or sub-creation, which involves shaping or manipulating pre-existing matter. They cannot infuse these creations with the Flame Imperishable. A notable example is Aulë, one of the Valar, who crafted the Dwarves. Initially, these beings were mere automatons, moving only according to Aulë's thoughts. It was only when Eru Ilúvatar chose to bestow them with the Flame Imperishable that the Dwarves gained true life and independence. This story illustrates the fundamental difference between divine creation and sub-creation: the former grants true life and free will, while the latter lacks these essential qualities until blessed by Eru. Tolkien clarifies this distinction in his letters:

"They [the Valar] shared in [the World’s] 'making'—but only on the same terms as we 'make' a work of art or story. The realization of it, the gift to it of a created reality of the same grade as their own, was the act of the One God"​​.

Orcs: The Corruption of Creation

The origin of orcs in Tolkien’s mythos serves as a poignant example of the difference between making and creating. According to various writings, orcs were not created by Morgoth or Sauron but were made by corrupting pre-existing beings. In "The Silmarillion," it is suggested that orcs were originally elves who were captured, tortured, and perverted by Morgoth's malevolent influence. This corruption transformed them into beings of evil, stripped of their original grace and beauty. In Morgoth's Ring we find:

"It became clear in time that undoubted Men could under the domination of Morgoth or his agents in a few generations be reduced almost to the Orc-level of mind and habits; and then they would or could be made to mate with Orcs, producing new breeds, often larger and more cunning. There is no doubt that long afterwards, in the Third Age, Saruman rediscovered this, or learned of it in lore, and in his lust for mastery committed this, his wickedest deed: the interbreeding of Orcs and Men, producing both Men-orcs large and cunning, and Orc-men treacherous and vile."​​.

Tolkien emphasizes that orcs, though rational and capable of independent thought, lack the divine spark of the Flame Imperishable. This absence signifies that while Morgoth could mar and twist the creations of Eru, he could not create life himself. In Flame Imperishable, Tolkien is quoted as saying:

"Treebeard does not say that the Dark Lord 'created' Trolls and Orcs. He says he 'made' them in counterfeit of certain creatures pre-existing. There is, to me, a wide gulf between the two statements"​​.

Essence
Elves: Created with inherent goodness and free will. Their essence is tied to beauty, longevity, and a deep connection to nature and creation.
Men: Created with inherent goodness and free will. Their essence includes mortality, adaptability, and a dynamic nature.
Orcs: Originally, corrupted elves or men, or made from slime and heat, the essence has been radically distorted and corrupted by evil. Their essence now reflects malevolence, subservience, and a perversion of their original nature.
Existence
Elves: Given existence by Eru Ilúvatar, independent and autonomous. Their being is fully realized with a true purpose aligned with their essence.
Men: Given existence by Eru Ilúvatar, independent and autonomous. Their being is dynamic, capable of growth, and change, and is fully realized.
Orcs: Their existence is subjugated to the will of their corrupt masters (Morgoth or Sauron). While they have real, physical existence, it is dependent on the malevolent forces that control them.
Autonomy
Elves: High degree of moral autonomy, capable of making independent choices and pursuing their own paths.
Men: High degree of moral autonomy, capable of making independent choices and pursuing their own paths.
Orcs: Almost entirely controlled by their evil masters, reflecting their corrupted essence and dependent existence.
Connection to Eru
Elves: Directly created by Eru with the Flame Imperishable, giving them true life and free will.
Men: Directly created by Eru with the Flame Imperishable, giving them true life and free will.
Orcs: Not created by Eru but rather made by corrupting pre-existing beings or materials. They lack the Flame Imperishable, highlighting their dependent and perverted nature.
Philosophical Implication
Elves: Represent the ideal of Tolkien's metaphysical and theological views, embodying true creation and the perfect blend of essence and existence.
Men: Embody the dynamic and adaptable nature of true creation with a perfect blend of essence and existence, according to Aquinas's philosophy.
Orcs: Serve as an example of how essence and existence can be corrupted and diminished by evil. Their existence is real but heavily dependent and perverted, lacking true autonomy and the Flame Imperishable.

Philosophical and Theological Implications

The distinction between made and created has profound implications in Tolkien’s universe. It aligns with Christian theology, reflecting the belief in a singular, omnipotent Creator who alone can grant true life. This distinction underscores the inherent limitations of evil: it is parasitic, relying on the corruption of what is good rather than generating new existence.
Orcs epitomize this concept. They are beings made through corruption, reflecting the perversion of creation. Their existence as fundamentally corrupted creatures illustrates the limits of Morgoth’s and Sauron’s power. They can induce suffering and manipulate life, but they cannot originate a true life that burns with the Flame Imperishable. This underscores a central theme in Tolkien’s works: the resilience of good and the ultimate impotence of evil to truly create.

On Artificial Intelligence

This leads us to Artificial Intelligence. Modern large language models (LLMs) and artificial intelligence systems, despite their sophisticated capabilities, are constructs without true volition or understanding. Basically, an LLM is an advanced version of autocomplete. These systems operate on vast datasets and algorithms designed to predict and generate human-like text (or audio or images), but they lack genuine consciousness, intent, and moral agency. Unlike beings created with the divine spark in Tolkien's world, LLMs do not possess free will or intrinsic purpose; they are tools made by humans to process and mimic patterns. Some commentators have even referred to AI as an alien intelligence, a ~shoggoth with a human face~, meaning that while the text may look humanlike, in reality, it originated not from a human but from an unknowable, formless alien process, which is the LLM.

"Well, we're fooled by their fluency, right? We just assume that if a system is fluent in manipulating language, then it has all the characteristics of human intelligence. But that impression is false." --Yann Lecun​​ on the Lex Fridman podcast #416

The outputs of an LLM are determined not by experience, education, and emotion but by the data and programming they receive, reflecting the biases and limitations inherent in their design. This underscores the crucial distinction between artificial constructs and beings endowed with the Flame Imperishable, with true life and volition. Parents, for instance, should think carefully about giving a child unbridled access to an LLM which has no discernible ethics. The AI is a soulless, thoughtless machine built by human researchers, much like an orc is designed by Sauron simply to act as an instrument of his evil desires. The ethical and philosophical results of deploying such constructs into our society is staggering indeed.

The AI is only the Tool of the Maker

Of course, while the analogy between LLMs and Orcs highlights the artificial nature and purpose-driven creation of both, there are clear and fundamental differences in moral intent and potential for ethical use. LLMs are not (as far as we know) inherently evil constructs. They seem to be neutral tools that reflect the intentions of their creators and users. As such, the focus should be on ensuring that AI development and deployment are guided by ethical principles to maximize their benefits and minimize potential harm. That said, as with social media, we may come to regret the technology and wish to fling it back into Mordor's fire.

Conclusion

Tolkien's distinction between made and created is a metaphysical aspect of Middle Earth. It emphasizes the unique power of Eru Ilúvatar's true creation and the corruptive nature of evil. The orcs symbolize this dichotomy, illustrating how evil can distort but not create. This concept resonates in modern large language models and AI systems, which lack genuine consciousness and moral agency despite their advanced capabilities. Orcs and contemporary LLMs demonstrate the ethical implications of using such technologies and serve to enrich the philosophical depth of Tolkien's work.

just a quick rant lol but please lmk if it gets better or what I can do to make it better
I feel that I grew up way too fast because I grew up in a setting where my parents barely spoke English, so I was constantly translating for them. Even receiving difficult news, I was the one who had to break it to my parents.
Since I was very little, I always wanted my parents to think I'm doing fine and that I am always happy. So, I never opened up to them and I also felt so uncomfortable showing any emotions to them. Even when I was being severely bullied for the first two years of middle school, I never said a word. However, they eventually found out from my guidance counselor, and even then I pretended that it was nothing. Even my past relationships, I kept a secret. I feel like my parents don't even know who I am. I know it's partially my fault for not telling them, but at the same time (I don't mean to blame my parents but..) they did not create that environment for me to feel comfortable to do so. Therefore, they overlook my feelings a lot and even claimed that I am not sympathetic enough. For example there has been situations where people I know have passed but I am so uncomfortable to expressing my emotions to the point where it came off as disrespectful. But the thing is, I am an extremely sensitive person. I just hide it very well. I feel things deeply and little words affect me a lot.
What hurts more is that I have younger siblings who I have always looked after. I literally felt like a mother to them even though our age gaps are not a big difference at all. But I see the difference in my life and their lives. I love them so much and I really do want to do anything to support them. But my whole life I have been making appointments for them, making an environment where they never have to feel like how I do and hide everything going on, and more, to the point where I am still like a mother. My parents also treat them so much differently. Everytime they go through a failure, my parents are there with open arms and rather worried about my siblings being stressed about it. Meanwhile, I feel the opposite way. Whenever I experience a failure that my parents know about, I feel stressed due to the way my parents will be stressed and worked up about it. I realized I never put myself first. Especially my mother, she will even sometimes yell at me for my mistakes and while she has never yelled at my siblings once but rather hugged them and told them it's fine. I have NEVER received that treatment.
I also feel that my parents have never been satisfied with me. Yk the classical AP. I'm not tall enough, I don't have a high enough GPA for them (even though at the moment I am in the top 3% in GPAs out of 800 people in a high achieving high school), I'm not skinny enough (even though I have a below average weight for my height), and etc etc. Once, my mom expected me to make the soccer team when I never even got training and I was competing against kids who have been training since they were young. When I didn't make it, she was so disappointed in me and I was freaking out so much because she gave me a silent treatment. This same thing happened with my brother for hockey, and he also did not make it. However, my mom reassured him and said it's fine and that it isn't fair that the other kids were already on teams for several years. It's just so so frustrating to see this. I know I'm being somewhat selfish and I am not at all saying I want my mom to be tougher on my brother. But it's rather that why didn't I get this treatment? Why do I always have to be on my toes and why do I always have to feel like a disappointment?
Regardless, I have so much love for my parents. I have a great relationship with them. They are always rooting for me and wanting the best for me. However, it's just so difficult especially because I live in an area that is white dominated and it's so so difficult for me to constantly wish I got the same treatment as the rest of the kids at my school. I am also fully aware that what I'm complaining about is nothing in comparison to some of the other stories here, but it's just that I am extremely fed up. I know I am being unfair by saying this, but if I try to communicate with my parents in English, it's English that is just jumbled up, pronounced wrong, and doesn't make sense. And I KNOW that they are trying their best, but it can just get so frustrating sometimes because my siblings cannot speak our native language as well as I do, so I ALWAYS translate back and forth to the point where I am so fed up. This isn't just about not knowing definitions, but rather the college process, banking related things, medical related things, etc etc. The only person in my family who is taking care of all this is me. And recently I have been so busy and I am just so tired. I have so much anger building up because nobody from my town has the same experience as me and neither do my siblings. So I am just constantly jealous.
I am going to be applying to colleges this Fall, and I have never been so stressed. My parents have extremely high expectations for me, and I have consistently not been meeting them. My parents will say stuff every once in a while that really hurt. They do not have faith in me for the college process and honestly I don't either. When they suggest some colleges (ofc all with super low acceptance rates) and if I say something like "I don't like the location" they will be shocked because for them it's only academics that matter. But I want to be happy and I want to enjoy it if I am spending four years of my life there. My dad has even said that I should apply because ofc it doesn't matter what I want but he emphasizes that he doesn't know if I am even going to have options from being accepted to many and being able to choose. It's just so frustrating especially because my whole life I have been doing everything myself (well it feels that way) and all of a sudden due to college applications coming up, my parents are somewhat trying to make sure I'm doing this and that. I know that this also sounds so bad of me but for example my parents asked me "did you ask for recommendation letters yet" or "did you participate in school today" and I know that this is nice of them but from my perspective, it frustrates me. This is because yes, I did already, and I have been in control my whole life and I just don't like how they decide to interfere now. They have been completely clueless about so many things and honestly I really know that they are trying to help me and I know that it's nice but pls someone say they understand my frustration lol. It's like my whole life I have been responsible about anything coming up, and them making sure I did something (which I did) just frustrates me because I know!!!!! Like ofcourse I did it already. I feel like it's too late for them to all of a sudden want to manage and be more involved in my responsibilities, and I just want them to back off. I know that this is the support that I want but they should've been like this when I was so much younger. I would now much rather just tell the good news and they don't need to know the process I took or setbacks that got in the way. I know I am being ungrateful but I am just so exhausted and done.
And again, yes my parents want the best for me, and yes they don't mean harm, and yes I am living a financially stable life because they work so hard...etc.. But all I want is emotionally available parents. That has been missing my entire life, and it's too late to reverse this. Btw, I have tried and tried multiple times to express my feelings. But the same events just repeat. They have apologized but there is no change. It was even to the point where I cried in front of them (which is so humiliating to me), and there is just no change. I also feel like since college applications are coming up, my whole conversations with my APs have been about that.

I'm in the middle of a really unpleasant situation at my job and wondering if anyone has any advice or words of encouragement.
The issues here started long before this but everything really kicked off last week when I was written up for being out for 2 shifts the week prior. I had strep throat and provided an excuse from my doctor, according to company policy. I have a very good attendance record. At first they claimed that no attendance policy existed and it was all up to discretion to which I printed and presented the company policy which is readily available via our Microsoft SharePoint. They had also cited me for 1 day which was approved PTO and another which I was able to prove that I worked. On-site HR refuses to speak to me about any of this and has been attempting to ignore it entirely, so last night I composed a lengthy email which contained all of my requests (that they ammend my attendance record to be accurate, provide me with a written ADA exemption for my disability, clarify attendance policy and expectations and explain to me why I'm being punished for the same actions others get away with on a constant basis) and sent it to our on-site HR, corporate HR and both supervisors present during my disciplinary meeting.
Today, when I arrived for my shift, I was demoted by my supervisor. When I asked why, I was told that it was due to my actions and that the only reason that exists to miss work without getting disciplinary action "is if you have a child". I do not have a child; I am in fact, infertile. I was under the impression that Family Status was a protected class in my state, but it seems it may only be in housing situations. My supervisor refused to elaborate in any way, stated to me that i "should've let this go", "just taken the write up and moved on". He stood up and left the room while I was speaking, effectively ending the meeting and refusing to engage any further.
I don't know how to handle this anymore. My supervisor was extremely hostile towards me during our meeting today. I work a night shift and do not see any upper management or office staff due to my start time. I've been documenting absolutely everything including recording the audio from all the meetings I have here (one party consent state) and I have 2 job interviews on Monday, but I don't know if there's more I can do or if i should even be as upset about this situation as I am. There are SO many details I've left out for sake of brevity. Any advice as to how to conduct myself beyond "document everything" and "follow policy to the letter" is welcomed.
Thanks for reading.

Welcome to Smile Sunday! Turn that caps lock off and gush about whatever achievements you want to showcase, or comment about what made you smile this week!
​
A few things to keep in mind:
​

• If you want to do some uppercase letters, feel free to, but try to avoid shouting! Sunday is a chill day.
• Avoid being maliciously happy at the expense of others.
• If you have a screenshot you'd like to share, please host on imgur.com and you can comment here. You can hyperlink by using brackets and parentheses, for example: \[desired text here\](insert hyperlink here). If you are on mobile, all you have to do is hit the chainlink, enter your desired text in the first box, then insert the link in the second box. We personally recommend Imgur, since it is free and does not require you to sign up.
• Phone camera photos are not allowed for general posting; however, for the Sunday megathread we have relaxed that restriction. All photos used in a positive and celebratory manner are allowed.
• Keep any opinions to yourself in the megathread; we don't want to stir up any controversies here, only good vibes.
• We want to have a chill time celebrating one another and making each other smile, so no comments like "haha, I'm really happy that it's so easy to 360 a controller player!"

​
Here are our recurring posts:
​
No Stupid Questions Monday - No question is stupid, ask anything DBD-related here.
Rage Wednesday - SMASH THAT CAPS LOCK AND RAGE ABOUT WHATEVER THE F$$$ HAS PISSED YOU OFF THIS WEEK

Yesterday, I had my graduation ceremony. After years of university with absolutely no help besides occasional rides to the bus stop and, very rarely, to campus, I finally graduated. Here's what my parents have done in the lead-up to graduation and the day after instead of supporting me.
My parents spent months leading up to the graduation freaking out about how I'll get a job, trying to control my hair and clothing (even implying I'm ugly when I choose my own hair and clothing), harassing me to hand out business cards to everyone I meet (especially if the situation would be an immense faux pas), grilling me on if my grades are good, lecturing me relentlessly about how I need to keep in contact with people in my class and it's soooo important and would I like to hear about how my dad got a job through nepotism for the eightieth time, asking me questions they already know the answers to (Yes, I'm still talking to my former classmates. Yes, I know that you worked in the Yukon when you were 18. Yes, I know about your friend who worked in a weather station. Yes, I know you had to move to find a job in the 1980s. Yes, I am aware that it is a possibility I might have to move too. Yes, I know that it's okay to invite people over to the house, you've only "informed" me about a hundred times. Yes, I know that school is important.) Every single thing that they "inform" me about is something I have very clearly expressed that I understand, and is just thinly veiled criticism. But my dad needs to lecture more than he needs oxygen.
Just constant nitpicking, criticism, and nothing I ever did was enough. I couldn't even focus on grades, because they would in their own words "put pressure on" me to do what they wanted. To handle their emotions for them. They're obsessed with the idea that I would have to move to a tiny town or work in a coal mine to find a job, because I'm more highly educated than my dad (who dropped out of university despite having all expenses paid by his father), and because my dad worked in the Yukon for two summers. He will never shut up about that, and he even goes so far as to hold us hostage with implicit threat of a massive tantrum to listen to him tell us the story again and again and again and to show us pictures of the place he worked on Google maps and point to everything he remembers. Sometimes he can go on for half an hour just repeating himself over and over.
Last summer, my parents even went and took action without my knowledge or approval to try and get a job set up for me cleaning up a mine contaminated with arsenic in the middle of nowhere, NWT. They tried to guilt and shame me into it ("What are your plans instead? Do you have another job lined up? Because you need to have a job. You can't sit around all day." This coming almost literally one week into summer vacation after my second-last year of university, when I could be using my energy to find interesting co-ops or explore hobbies or travel, instead dealing with their harassment and obsession with trying to literally trap me in a fucking arsenic mine.) They went on and on, lectured me over and over, implied that I would be embarrassing my grandfather if I didn't go, and so on. Eventually they said "You can go work or get a certification", and I picked the certification, but then they got grumpy anyways, and every week for the entire summer they would ask "Are you still working on the certification?". Of course, dipsh*t. I've told you fifty times how long the program lasts.
They don't care about what I'm learning in class, don't care about my hobbies or interests, only care about my friends as either a means to get backdoored into a job or a "nice French Canadian woman" to have babies with. They don't care if I'm struggling, and are completely unavailable to help in any regard. Any request for help would result in a guilt trip. Even if I actually couldn't eat dinner with the family for one day because I had a test, my father would get raw emotions and I'd have to walk on eggshells for a few days. The one time I mentioned I was having trouble studying, instead of shutting up and no longer ranting in the main floor where I could hear him or turning the TV off, he just dragged a table into the unfurnished boiler room (without asking me) and then told me that I would have to study there. I wasn't allowed to choose not to, because he'd already set it up. Ironically, my anger at him did let me study pretty well for the one day that I was forced there. He tried to keep me there long-term because he thought it was just such a great idea, but I managed to trick him into thinking I didn't need help studying anymore, so I got to study at a desk with a light on it and flooring that wasn't bare cement. Hooray for the most minor victory imaginable.
In the months leading up to graduation, did they care about how hard I was working at my capstone project and offer support? Absolutely not! Did they care about how well my sleep quality was, how many times the cat woke me up because they didn't play with her enough or give her enough attention? Nope! Did they care about how exhausting it was to deal with their constant lectures on the same topics, and to have to give them affirmations ("Yes, you're right, that's right, good job, nice, very tasty, good work, oh really?, neat, that's cool, how'd you make that?, mhm, I agree, you're being reasonable, they're being ridiculous, that's crazy") a hundred times a day? Not even in the slightest!
We spend more time talking about my dad's college friends than about anything I or my brother care about.
Then, leading up to graduation. all I've gotten are the most humiliating, infuriating, insulting messages and lectures from my parents. I get almost daily emails and texts saying "You need to get a job, it's important to look for a job" despite the fact I've told them I am looking probably fifty times. Too cowardly to say it to my face. I've been texted literal links to a Google search for "[degree name] jobs [city]" more than once. Both my parents treat me like I don't listen, when I do. They treat me like I'm lazy, when I've put myself through university with no help even after they lied to me about giving me financial aid and made me out to be a bully demanding more money when all I did was say "alright" and then pay for it myself. They must have sternly given me a talking to about how "I'm not going to pay for university, you know that, right? You need to pay. Don't expect us to pay. Because we paid for your first semesters, you know that, right? We've already paid for enough." thirty times, even after I'd made the final payment. They treat me like I'm stupid when I have expressed understanding before. They treat me like I'm a bully while I always bend over backwards for them, just because I don't play my role as "surrogate mommy but this time I get to tell her what to do" well enough.
It feels like they're almost raising me into a replacement or surrogate parent. Like my dad wants me to be his mom or dad, except this time he gets to be in charge. And my mom wants me to be her mom, except this time when she freaks out or has her deer in headlights look, she'll get someone to step up and take care of everything for her. I distinctly remember having to comfort her even for things she did to me, like tell me that a pair of comfortable shoes I picked out was good and she'd get them, and then immediately scream "take it out, take it out!" after it was scanned at the register. I could not have been older than twelve. And for my dad, he always rants and raves to me exactly like he does to his parents, except without including blame for them sending him to boarding school and instead having tons of old "life updates" like where he worked when he was 18 and what music he liked to listen to in high school, stuff like that. Then he expects me to praise him or be interested like his parents never were (he always tells me that his parents only cared about his car when they called).
So now I graduated. All they had to say in the days coming up to it was to grill me on the time I'd have to be at the venue and the time I was planning to leave the house to get there on time, with a distinct air of "you're too lazy to think of this in advance and too stupid to figure it out without a plan". Of course, I had to answer this question probably five times, because they don't care to ever listen to me. Before the ceremony I got text messages showing they were way more excited about themselves being here than anything relating to me, with multiple messages expressing how they arrived and it was exciting, then they asked me how the atmosphere was and their only reply was a one-word "nice" with no punctuation, because they don't care about me and only ask droll questions to segue into their next bit.
After grad, there was two generic sentences spoken with no emotion about how it was nice I graduated, and then they made a whole song and dance about the amazing gifts they got me. It was a degree frame I picked out myself that my dad presented as new and exciting (because he never pays attention to me, of course, when I told him I had picked one out and ordered it with my mother. Also she had another freakout about price and acted like I was holding her hostage by taking her unforced offer to buy me the second-cheapest degree frame on offer.). Then he presented the free gift small frame they got with it as though I should praise him for it, then a congratulation card that was alright I suppose if only because my brother drew a little creature in it that made me smile (my parents did not add anything special or meaningful to it). There was also a cap, which I genuinely enjoy and is nice, and a cheap ballpoint pen for some reason. He said there was more gifts at home, which okay, I don't care about gifts but I'd like him to at least be as excited for my graduation as he was for the picture frame. I didn't get any souvenirs from the bookstore because I knew if I got something he'd also gotten he'd freak out and accuse me of not listening to him or whatever, so I waited. When I got home my gift was Skittles. I don't know why I thought me might have gone to the bookstore and gotten me something special related to my actual interests. He doesn't care to know what those are anyways. I guess I hoped that at least this one day would be different.
Today, the day after graduation, all I've gotten from my parents is:
- Involved in a lecture and manufactured drama about my brother not using my car to drive to his job, even though my dad had the exact opposite position the entire rest of the year, because "what if you need to drive somewhere?", trying to manufacture a fight between my brother and me while also guilting and shaming me for not driving as a hobby like he does.
- A text message from my mother asking me if I'm awake because she wants more ammo to paint me as lazy. Nevermind that I barely slept the night before to make it to grad (of course neither of my parents would care enough about me to come with me as a family. I was literally the only person I saw who went on my own and without their family showing up early too, to support them. I walked past so many families in the parking lot knowing my mother couldn't be bothered to change out of her pajamas for me.) Nevermind I had a huge day that day, and that I was taking care of the cat's energy all that night too because attending my grad is apparently soooo draining my parents can't look after their own pet, and somehow it falls to me. All that matters is she woke up early and I didn't (after I handled all her inconveniences for her, funny how that works).
- Rapid knocks on my door because my dad is making bread as a hobby and apparently "needs" me there to help him with it, and then also "needed" me to stay and make cookies with him.
- A lecture about someone I never knew who apparently once threw something at another kid on my street when I was about 5, and about how he died and how his wife's hobby was really expensive or whatever and if I really don't remember him?
- I went to a showhome for fun and brought back the brochure. My dad jabbed his finger at the pictures on it to explain the house to me like I wasn't the one who literally brought the brochure back. Never asked if I cared or anything, just immediate launch into lecture and expecting me to stay and listen and praise him for being so smart or whatever.
- A lecture about D Day for some fucking reason. My dad is obsessed with history, and he doesn't have any friends to talk to (wonder why) so his lectures always fall on my ears.
- An email from my mother explaining in an extremely condescending way how important it is to have a cover letter when applying for jobs (just completely assuming I don't write them and also am too lazy or stupid to think about having them) including copy-pasted text from a sample cover letter that is no doubt one of the first results on google for "cover letter example"
- An angry email from my mother including a job she found on google
But, contrast that to my neighbors across the street. I was friends them in grade school, haven't seen them in like ten years, and just on my way past to the showhome we said hi and chatted in a genuinely nice conversation that wasn't a one-sided lecture like usual in my house. They could sense my emotions and didn't try to keep me there longer than I wanted to rant, they were genuinely interested in me and gave me space and interest to express myself, their mother even hugged me for graduating and it was the most genuine hug and congratulations I've ever received in person. Every other hug was my family members forcing me to hug them for their own sole benefit. I admit I cried a bit later on my walk thinking about it.
Compared to my parents, the parents of old friends care more about me, trust me more, believe in me more, have more hope for my future, are more interested in me, and understand me better. It's tremendously sad that all throughout my graduation ceremony I was worried about my parents becoming upset for some random reason and blowing up at me. I'm glad I at least focused and made myself feel some pride and joy in myself for graduating.
Even the random people I met who were also taking part in the open house were nicer and better conversationalists than my parents. A random elderly couple I have never seen in my life can have a better interaction with me than my own parents. The realtor was more chill and less perfectionistic than my parents by a mile. His million-dollar house sale was something he was less stressed and perfectionistic about and something he beat himself up over less than my parents are about my hairstyle when I'm going to class because "What if you meet someone in industry and they see you're not professional".
It's absurd.

Quick background goes like this: BM is HCBM about pretty much everything. She makes constant accusations of abuse, stalking, sabotage, slander, etc, basically anything she can potentially blame on SO or me or thinks make us looks bad. They’ve been in court for almost two years straight now, SO started by just wanting to enforce the existing order, BM wants to rewrite it to have total control of SO’s house/time as well. It’s a lot.
Whenever HCBM senses she is not in the court’s favor (examples include: being denied a change of venue and accusing the judge of taking bribes from us, refusing to complete her psyche evaluation and being found in contempt, accusing me of sleeping with the evaluator to sabotage her as the reason, firing five lawyers to our knowledge and now not being able to find someone to represent her) she starts to demand we settle or do mediation instead. Court has been delayed almost 6 months because of this. She will flip back to demanding we go before a judge and have a proper trial to “tell all her truth” whenever something upsets her.
Extra context, she lives about 45 minutes south of us, with her other ex/BD, but has moved or tried to move several times, mostly to a coastal city 3 hours away (also conveniently close to state lines) and doesn’t like to tell SO where exactly or when. Part of the reason for court, she’s withheld SK, and threatened to withhold him in the future because moving makes it too difficult for her to arrange a third party (ex she lives with currently does all exchanges with SO) and it’s “too dangerous” for SO to know her address or for her to meet SO herself because she “fears for her life with [me]”. Anyway, the moves usually only happen for a couple of months at a time, she says because we stalk and bully her out of whatever community she moves to, I suspect it’s because she realizes she has to be a full time parent alone and also might have to get a job to pay rent. Other ex handles all of that when she lives there.
Anyways. We’re currently in one of the “we should settle to avoid conflict” HCBM phases. This ranges from offering SO primary custody (with a million stipulations) to trying to make him agree to follow the order in place already? That’s she’s not following?? Her logic astounds. She asked for mediation, SO agreed. She wouldn’t respond to any scheduling requests and then got mad at SO for something and demanded trial. She got denied her change of venue and now she’s in the mood to settle again. SO and attorney send an offer letter. Nope! Now she wants to do mediation because SO’s attorney isn’t properly addressing her concerns and she NEEDS a third party involved. What are the concerns? Who knows! She won’t tell! It’s a big secret! But we’re not addressing it so she can’t POSSIBLY agree to anything without a third party! For some reason!
Added bonus, She always says she’s taking SK to his doctor and having him tested for things and doing checkups but has always refused to share any of the results or where she takes him “for safety” and so we can’t “interfere and sabotage” his medical care to make her look like a bad parent. Usually she says this because she is accusing us of poisoning the kid or hurting him. From discovery, SO says he’s been to urgent care a few times, for normal kid stuff but not a primary care doctor or anything like that. Part of her new demands? HCBM will of course still need to be primary for custody because she is “working closely with SK’s pedestrian (she can’t spell pediatrician) to resolve his bowel issues” and the only doctor which can possibly do that is in a city another hour south of her, and it would be sooooooo inconvenient for SO to drive there and she’s happy to do it and “stability is critical” for SK so it will of be better for everyone to let her decide the schedule. She of course refuses to provide the name of the clinic or doctor or any of the records. She just says so and we should all believe her.
SO is currently banging his head on the wall while I drink a cider and consider reminding him condoms are cheap

From the log of Edward Price – Clerk for Diplomat Howard Weathers – 03.28.2803
I suppose a summary is in order for things to be clear. Humanity has a bit of a reputation as an odd lot in the galaxy. Most aliens don’t know really know what to think about us. You see, most aliens are actually somewhat boring, having fallen into galactic societal niches over thousands of years. The Atroxians are were space pirates, the Vontacruz own the casinos and travel cruise industries, and the Hordun operate the most efficient morgues this side of the galaxy – usually because of the Atroxians. But the Delridians? They are diplomats. And dare I say that they are the weird ones.
Delri Prima is the homeworld of the Delridians, a tall, lanky race who look like the grimdark cousins of a Star Wars Kaminoan. Brilliant medics, they apparently don’t see a difference between medical work and diplomacy, seeing both fields as the healing arts. Their medicocracy has a long list of accomplishments throughout the galaxy, enough that it’d look like an 18-hour credit reel on a movie. My guess is that they may have been the “Humans” of the galaxy preceding us before they finally settled, and rumors have it that the K’kituun Death Puppets are an ancient offshoot from their early days on the galactic stage.
But more to the point, after about 180 years on the galactic stage, Humanity has made a decent name for ourselves as the handyman and eccentric nerd. We are celebrated, thrown strange looks, worried glances, and altogether treated as small children. Though with the destruction of Axtroxia, they may want to worry about what will happen when we hit puberty. The Delridians have already been through that, though they were never as eccentric as we are.
They reached out to Humanity with a diplomatic frigate appropriately named Olive Branch about a year ago. I’ve learned they like to reflect the cultures they are talking to, so as to ease negotiations. Can’t imagine what the Atroxian equivalent was. Probably something like ‘Torn Heads’. Regardless, Diplomat Weathers was finally selected as the Earth delegate to talk on Delri Prima, and oh boy. That is a dark world. Like, bring a flashlight dark. I don’t know whether it is the slow spin of the planet, or the climate generators they have, but the entire twilight band is just dark and grey. It rains, and thankfully it is safe water, but it is eerie. From the embassy city they built to make us more comfortable, you can look out across the Delridian jungle and see the many other diplomatic cities slowly being devoured by the vines and trees.
The first night was fine, though I’m not sure any of us slept well. We were each provided a separate room or, well, house really. The entire city was made of a cold stone, themed after some old Italian city on Earth. The wind slipped through the narrow streets with a soft whistle, bringing with it a faint jungle fog. Somewhere down the street was a clattering window shutter, but with how much stone they used, and the strange alignment of the streets, you could hear a pin drop from eight blocks away!
Talks went well for the first three days as Diplomat Weathers and the Delridians got to know each other. I met with and discussed a number of cultural similarities with a member of the alien entourage, a Nurse Kelayo, when I wasn’t with the others in my group exploring the city. She was very proud of the settlement they built for us, but in our talks, she asked what we thought of the book. What book?
Well, after having a wonderful meal with my coworkers and some of the alien entourage, we said our farewells and parted ways. Kelayo was vague, but had explained how they had acquired a copy of the book, and that she hoped that we enjoyed the effort she put into it.

I didn’t look into it immediately when I returned to the lonely, lifeless house that was my quarters. Mark was my closest neighbor, and he was a block down. The Delridians, fresh from talks with the Hordun, thought we may want some privacy from each other. And while it is nice not having to hear Mark snore in the cabin like on the flight here, the house was a little… too private.
It was as I was preparing to turn off the light to go to sleep that I thought to look in the nightstand beside me. Kelayo had told us about the book, and when I opened the top drawer, it was indeed there. Sitting center and alone was an old Earth book of gnarled leather and no visible title. Whatever poor creature the Delridians had used to make the cover had terrible skin!
Opening the book, I found it to have been printed in an old dialect of English from before the Third World War, with some much older words I did not recognize. It certainly looked like it was printed in the archaic methods of old Earth, with wet ink instead of modern digital ink that provided touch-based pseudo-memoric context.
I began to flip through the pages of this strange book, turning up the brightness on the nightstand lamp to see better. The faded pages of the book looked sick and moldy, and my skin crawled just touching it, but the letters, despite the stains and grunge, seemed to pop from the page in crisp black. In fact, the ink was so black that it felt like I was staring into the void with each letter. Kelayo’s book was some archaic text of old Earth culture from the end of the 20^th century, though I did not recognize the name. Written by a Bishop Simon from some archaic cult or religion, the book functioned as a “spellbook” like a deepdive virtual reality fantasy game might have. It was filled with a plethora of gods I did not recognize, and a ton of phonetic gibberish that sounded good when said, but easily complicated.
I hadn’t gotten too far when I heard a man’s scream next to me. Jumping out of my skin, I found no one there. But I remembered where I was, and crept to the window. It was Mark’s voice, more panicky than I had ever heard him. Peeking through the slats of the window, I scanned the street towards Mark’s place. The light was on, and someone was shuffling down the street, murmuring in pain.
Rushing down to the street, I rushed out to help him. Mark’s mutterings were too quiet, and he was holding something to his chest. It may have been a minute before I collected myself and tried to get answers from him, but you have to understand, I’ve never seen a dying man before. Not in real life. In the dim and permanent gloom, I could barely make out the trail of blood behind him. He pleaded again and again, and I had to find out where he was injured, and what it was he was carrying.
I went to take what he held, only to realized that in my own fervor to aid him I still had that creepy book. I put that down to wrench free Mark’s own possession. I really wish I hadn’t, for his grip was weak, with only one hand. I held his other, and everything above it.
My own voice was the next I heard echoing down the street as I most certainly fell backwards. Sorry Mark, but I lost your arm. Well, your first one. The second is decorating some chandelier somewhere, courtesy of Vanessa.
Please understand that for anyone in my situation, gorey horror was never my fancy, and I hope no one in the auditing board holds it against me. I would bet credits that any of you would have done much the same as I did.
Time is… unreliable on Delri Prima, with its twilit band and gloom. The only thing that moves is that blasted fog. And the vines. Especially the vines. I’m not sure how long I ran, but Vanessa was the one to find me, flanked by a street littered with Human bodies. Far more people than joined us on the crew… I think. You might want to review the ship manifest just to be sure.
Vanessa, once she verified my identity, guided me through the littered street, still gurgling and reaching out to us. Give her a raise, by the way. She’s the one that got us out of there. We met up with Dwayne and Harry, both armed with metal pipes and whatever other junk they salvaged, and we retreated to a boarded up house with other surviving members of the crew. They were glad to see me, though I don’t remember who they were. Many were new faces to the ship for this mission.
We settled here for hours? A day? Our comms were filled with static, and we couldn’t reach Mr. Weathers to see if he was ok. We needed to get off this planet. Someone mentioned that the ship was still parked at the landing bay. All eyes turned to someone in the back of the group, who slowly stood up, her form long and lanky. Kelayo, the Delridian nurse.
Vanessa worked with Kelayo on a plan to move through the city to the landing bay, while the rest of us sought supplies. This house had a basement, connected to a series of tunnels which we would use to slip under whatever muttering, mumbling horrors pleaded us to come outside.
Slowly, and as quietly as we could, our train of survivors crept through the tunnels. Our flashlights that Ben had found were pathetically dim, and frequently flickered out, sounding with a loud clunk whenever someone whacked it awake. Icy water dripped from the long tangled hairs of wriggling moss that clung to and between the bricks, the lights illuminating white lice-like that lived within the tangle.
Splashing was the only sound we heard for a long time, along with someone’s horrid cough. He was in the back of the line, far behind me, but kept coughing and groaning. Others frequently shushed him, louder than he coughed. But for all the good their efforts to keep him quiet were, it paled in comparison to Kelayo’s odd excitement. When I inquired her about her unusual positivity, she admitted fascination over the many accounts of average Humans combatting the supernatural evils that threatened Earth. How we could survive on a planet infested with the dead with only equally dark magicks astounded her, despite our culture not having widespread knowledge or application of this means of survival. It was faint, but she had nodded at the book. Why did I still have this disgusting leatherback that seemed to shiver in the cold?
I apologize for any impact I may have had on diplomatic relations with the Delridians, but I said some uncouth remarks about the whole situation and the book. I flipped it open to a random page to give an example, forgetting in my annoyance just how dark it was in the tunnels. But that ink… that horrid archaic stain… was fully legible. I admit I came to a stop in awe, though shortlived as the train of people behind me bumped into me. That coughing was gone.
So were half the people we had been travelling with. Kelayo glanced around with a chitter. She was having too much fun with the spooky, and now we heard skittering and scrape scrape scraping on the bricks. Vanessa fired a shot down the tunnel and urged us to run, so we did.
We were near the landing bay when we ducked into a sideroom per Kelayo’s prompting, and shoved a convenient table in the way of the door. The skittering was above us on the ground floor too, and then someone grabbed my foot. It may have been Mark. Well, the part of Mark I dropped.
Long gnarled fingers covered in dirt were the hallmark of these freaky things. Human hands with a life of their own, skittering around like bugs as they fled the flashlight’s beam and sought dark corners. These shelters included their unholy wriggling up our pants and jackets, some grips strong and muscular, and others gentle and cautious. If you have ever had a massage, you may never want one again once a chilly, slimy, dismembered hand tries to nest between your shoulder blades.
Vanessa fired off a few shots in her desperate attempt to keep the grabby hands off, though she nicked Ben’s ear in the process. The loud noise scattered the skitterhands enough for us to fling the last few from our persons. Vanessa slammed the book I still carried, ordering me to read it. She had lost her copy early on, but had the gist of its contents.
The ink on the book was darkest on one particular page, with a weird symbol that looked like it said XOOD. An old-Earth linguist may understand it better than I. Kelayo was forced to provide guidance, as she was the expert on the book, and with many, many attempts, and a dark horde gathering upstairs, were ready to begin. Vanessa was out of shots in her gun, and Ben and Dwayne were futiley pushing back the horde of impossible crewmen. These people smelled horribly of rotten meat, and overtook Ben first, followed swiftly by Dwayne.
Vanessa had backed into a corner, clearly scared. I can’t blame her, since I was, too. But I couldn’t move, couldn’t join her in the false safety of the corner. The rotten crew… this dead crew, was in the room with us, and were already grabbing me. Amidst the noise and confusion, I could hear Vanessa being attacked behind me, and the dull nails of my own assailants tearing at my skin. Kelayo, her form thin and dark, simply stood amidst the dead.
Read it, she said.
Say it with all your heart.
I remember the word that pierced the world that day, but can’t remember saying it. But my throat burns whenever I utter it now. BARASHAKUSHU. The dead froze in place, their fingers dug deep into my skin. BARASHAKUSHU. Limp, lifeless, just as they should be. BARASHAKUSHU. The haze in the air, even in the basement, lifted. BARASHAKUSHU. Vanessa breathed deep as I pulled her from the bodies and out the house to the crowded, lifeless street.
We limped, though we did not bleed, filled with holes and grime, and caked in blood. Kelayo followed wraithlike behind us, always ten paces behind. The landing bay was before us. Our ship and salvation was before us.
Diplomat Weathers was fine, though alarmed at our state. Delridian doctors tended to us as we explained what happened. A full transcript is available via the ship’s DIA-Log.
When all was said and done, the Delridian diplomat thanked us for being so willing to open discourse. To celebrate successful talks between our species, he offered us a parting feast. He motioned Kaleyo over, who had apparently been tasked with researching Human culture for the talks.
She explained over dinner about how she had poured over a stunning variety of Human dishes from our many cultures, but that she had settled on one that appeared to be a universal favorite. An Italian dish of long, stringy noodles over their equivalent of a white cream sauce. And dinner was fantastic! But Kaleyo seemed confused as well, stating that she had a difficult time picking out the right recipe. The instructions were apparently all over the place with a lot of strange steps that seemed superfluous to food preparation.
I asked her what she meant, to which she replied, “The base ingredients were simple, almost mundane. Of note, the various rituals in the preparation exhausted many of our best doctors. Some are still seeking treatment after one batch escaped. You Humans have a very strange culture of food, especially with the names. I believe you called this one… creepy pasta?”
Then the meatball on my fork blinked at me.

Good Day/Eve all,
I'm currently in the process of selling my parents' home in Novaliches, QC (title in my name) and have found a buyer but unfortunately, the buyer is applying for a loan with the Bank of the Philippine Islands (BPI), making more daunting due to standard practices in the Ph.
According to some Ph realtor agents, there are two important documents that need to be released before the seller receives the complete payment for the property. After a buyer has applied and has been approved for a loan, a Letter of Guarantee (LOG) is issued by the financial institution (BPI) to the buyer assuring just that, a document that guarantees the buyer funds to purchase the property. I was informed that the buyer provides a down payment (earnest money) to the seller at this point. Additionally, an Electronic Certificate Authorizing Registration (eCAR) is issued by Bureau if Internal Revenue (BIR, I'm guessing the equivalent of IRS) is also used as this document assures that all taxes applicable to the transfer are paid.
And here comes the kicker. Once the eCar is released, the seller is supposed to hand over the title of the property (remember no complete payment yet but just a down payment) to the Registry of Deeds (Ph govt entity that maintains land records and titles), who will then change the title from seller to buyer (oh, did I mention that the seller has not received payment yet). Once this is completed, this document will then be given to the financial institution BPI, who will then release funds to the seller.
I was advised that this whole process from when the title is surrendered to the Registry of Deeds, to when the bank releases the funds may take up to two months. WTF...
is there an easier way? Is there a way I can minimize this time without funds? Is there some sort of insurance or back up I can use to ease my anxieties and uncertainties?
No, I do not want to sell at below market price, that may attract investors with ready cash, simplifying the process. I just want my parents to get what's theirs without the worry. maybe not possible in the Ph.
thanks all and looking forward to some of your examples, experiences and possibly solutions...

I've been trying to read more scientific studies and I keep coming across a string of letters, numbers, and characters that I don't know how to read. I have an example here.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/10664066/
In that abstract, it shows a P for powerlifter. "The proportion of AR-containing myonuclei per fibre cross-section was higher in the trapezius than in the vastus lateralis (P<0.05)."
The part that I don't understand has been bolded and italicized. Does that mean the powerlifter had under .05 androgen receptor containing myonuclei?

The definitive guide on how to find any Ricoh service manual. Also works for Lanier, Savin, Gestetner, and Nashuatec.
The first rule is that Ricoh’s “engineering group” can be thought of as a parent company to all these brands. As such they have their own name and model numbers, and then they get re-branded and models renamed under the different bands.
So the trick is find the “real” model number. It’s usually a 4-digit code starting with a letter and 3 numerals.
If you’re looking at the copier, just go to the serial number sticker. There will also be a code somewhere in there is the following format:
A000-00
A000-0000
All you need is the first 4 digits. Then search for “A000 Service Manual” or “A000 Parts Catalog.”
For example a Ricoh MP C2003 had a code of “D176-27.” Easy.
If you’re taking a call and haven’t seen the unit yet, there’s still a trick. Go to the manufacturer’s website and download the user guide. The filename might already have the correct prefix, or if not, go to the bottom of the last page. For an example a “Ricoh C5502a” guide produced the code “D143.” finding the service manual and parts catalog was simple after that.

I just had what I think was one of the most useless conversations with my mother and I don't think I got my point across. This has 3 parts so you going to read a lot.
A quick bit of information about me. I am from the Caribbean I have lived with my mother for most of my life. I recently moved in with her around 2 years ago. I lived with my grandmother and moved to the United States with my mother for a better life and opportunities.
My dad has sadly passed on and I live with my stepfather, mother, 3 sisters, and my cousin who lives with us.
I lived with my grandmother for most of my life while my mother went to go start a life with my stepdad after my dad passed away. (this was after my dad's funeral not right after he died.) My grandparents asked to take care of me because I was all that they had left of my dad. So my grandmother and uncle raised me until I moved. in with her.
Now don't think Im upset with her for leaving me. I couldn't care less. I am glad she found my stepdad he's a good man and she has plenty of opp in the U.S. I am glad she moved here.
So my mother and I were dropping my best friend off at her house and while they were talking I zoned out because you know I didn't want to hear what they were talking about between them, not my business, then my name came up when they were talking about my room and she asked me a question. Now I did hear when she asked me and I gave a slight mhm. It wasn't loud enough for her to hear, so I repeated it and told her I said it and she didn't hear me say it so I just said it louder.
After dropping off my best friend she brought it up that she thinks whenever I'm talking to her I always give her half-assed answers and not having a full conversation with her as I do with other people, I was confused by this and I told her no I don't, I give you proper responses in my opinion. (Now real quick to give you a backstory my family and my mom's best friend's family went out to Busch Gardens.) She brought out the fact that I was talking to my mom's best friend who is the mother of her family, a lot more and I was able to have more conversations with her. Which is true, I did and was able to have better conversations with her. I feel like I can have much more comfortable conversations with other people than my mother because my mother takes things too literally and can never get a joke. Like if my and sisters + my cousin who lives with us is joking about something she would always have to chime in and ruin the joke. My mother would always take simple things to the extreme for no reason. I feel like I can't tell a simple joke without her giving me a lecture about it, for example, I say the n-word a lot why? Because I'm black and the previous environment I lived in basically used it daily every day. So of course I would say it. Also at my school children say it even the white kids because no one cares that much. I sure as hell don't care it's just a word, but whenever I say it she doesn't want me to use it at home because I'm in America now. Does she think I'm retarded? Does she think I don't know what to say in public? I honestly want to know what the fuck she trusts me with because I already know what to say around people. Of course, I didn't tell her this, I just told her I used it to analyze people so I know what to say and what I cannot say around people. which it true that something you have to do.
Along with this I also think when I bring up a point to her she doesn't look at it from my pov or she flat out doesn't care, all she cares about is how she feels because one time I remember that I got a letter saying that I could've gotten a scholarship if i got my green card and I don't have it but I didn't mind because I know God has better plans for me but I still showed it to my mom for validation. You know what she told me to put it under my mattress. What mother would tell her child that? It's a scholarship! Of course, I couldn't use it but It would be nice to show a litter interest.
Let's not forget about the time when I told her I got accepted into Saint Leo and what she told me. "Any school would accept you for money!" Excuse me what the fuck? who the hell would say that?
Why wouldn't I tell her how I truly feel because last time I tried that she flipped out and thought I was putting other people over her or something. I don't truly remember because I want that to stay locked away but you guys see where I trying to come from?
Anyway, I don't wanna go on too long with a rant with this one. The point I'm trying to make is that if she wants to have a conversation make me feel more comfortable with telling you things so I don't feel like ima wasting my time telling you something or you are going to push my feelings aside and put yours in front of mine. I will post another 2 soon but I want to know what should I do. I just want her to stop jumping to conclusions and look at it from my pov and I want to feel comfortable around her but I just can't.

Hello! Please don’t judge me, I’m merely a mother trying to get by lol. I never thought having a BSN wouldn’t be enough to provide financially for my family. So anywho, I have started to pursue side hustles, one being POD t-shirts. I want to have a niche and something I actually care about so I naturally went with nursing. I’m curious though, would any of you actually wear a nursing related t-shirt? If so, are you more likely to wear a funny one or a simple “registered nurse” lettering t-shirt for example. I’ve already checked out the competition obviously and these shirts are selling but I wonder if real nurses are purchasing or if maybe a majority of sales are family buying as gifts 😅. I know something like this is trial and error but I don’t want to waste much time if I can help it. Thanks in advance!

My girlfriend of 6 months has put fourth this notion of hers that she hates being told what to do, and wants to do what she pleases and does so regardless of how i feel about it. I understand no one likes being told what to do but i also understand when you are in a relationship, if something upsets your partner you should bare that into consideration. Our whole relationship she has told me i have been absolutely perfect with everything except from the one thing that ill ask her to not do certain things sometimes and of course that is understandable, it comes off controlling so i became the absolutely perfect partner for her. I said you do what you want, if it upsets me it does just live with that however now it just feels as though im not even allowed to be upset if she does something that would upset me. For example we both have very traditional mindsets so from a liberal perspective it seems drastic but she would post slightly thirst trappy tiktoks and i of course asked her to stop, and she did for a while but then expressed how she feels controlled and it upsets her, i didnt know thats how it came off and i immediately said do what you want since i never wqnt ber to feel that way however now i simply dont care at all now about what she does. For a long while, she would see me pop up and air it and to anyone, i wouldnt think twice qbout that, but if this is the person im going to be marrying, her doing this is obviously upsetting, i bought it up recently and she said what ur gonna hold it against me? As if i wasnt allowed to be upset with the fact that the women i love sees mssaging me as a chore. And there are simply other small things she does which shows me the love she claims to have for me is nothing close to what it actually is. Like i always have to cater for her needs and its only when im visibly upset she will consider mine, i spoil her with gifts, not the materialistic kind, but stuff money cant buy like writing letters because i know she likes it, yet it feels what i am getting is nothing to what im putting in, and i have expressed this to her and she said shes just been busy with school work but thats been done for a good minute yet still she hasnt gone through with her promise. So now i have lost all care into her actions and dont know what to do, any advice? (Edit) i really do love her with all my heart and am willing to do whatever to make it work but i also cant go to her with this, since normally i do but like i said, she makes me feel like im in the wrong for saying shes wrong so i feel as though we would reach a point of no return so pleasee help me reddit

Hello all, I just joined and this is my first post. Hopefully I did it right. I recently came across this blog post from Agent Eric Smith at P.S. Literary that I found really helpful. He shares query letters of clients that he took on and have since had their books published.
https://www.ericsmithrocks.com/perfect-pitch

Hey all,
This is going to be a long post, so I hope you can be patient and read through all of it, because I don't know who to go for advice anymore.
For some context I applied for Masters programs in CS for the Fall'24 intake cycle.
Overall, while I did receive a couple of admits, for me personally I failed to achieve my goals this cycle.
I say this because, my goal was to get into a thesis-based Masters in Canada and the only offer I received from a Canadian university was for a course-based program. The other offer I received was from a top university in EU, however without a scholarship. Due to financial constraints, I was not able to attend either. While I have identified some mistakes I made, I am looking for advice on how I can further improve my chances for the Fall'25 intake cycle, which doesn't seem too far away at this point.
Here is a brief overview of my profile and some things I feel may have had a negative impact:

• I graduated with a decent overall GPA of 9.1/10 from a not very well known university, but I don't have A grades in some courses which the admissions committee may feel are important (Probability & Stats, Algorithms)
• I did a 9 month long research internship at one of the T5 CS schools in the US, and my advisors did agree to write me a letter of recommendation while I was there, however after I returned back to my home country and the admission cycle began, they did not respond to my requests for a recommendation even after I reached out multiple times (over email and even on Linkedin after I became desperate).Do you think not having a letter from someplace I worked at for a significant period of time be viewed as a red flag? I have heard advice that largely varies on the importance of recommendations for Masters programs (for example, the general trend I have observed is that most people say it is the one of the most important parts of the application package, however one of the Profs who served on the ad-com where I did my research internship said because of the number of applications they get, they are unable to read Statements of Purpose and recommendations especially for international applicants and resort to sorting students based on where they graduated from and their GPA)
• Moreover, since the PhD student I was working with graduated a couple of months after the end of my internship, they didn't bother to re-submit the work we had done at after it was rejected a couple of times while they were still a student.
• Here is where I believe I made a significant mistake: For thesis based programs in Canada, you usually have to reach out to potential advisors before you even apply to the program, so your advisor can determine if there's a match in research interests. So far, my research experience (9 months of research internship mentioned before, and now 1 year of post-bacc research internship at one of the top universities in India) has been at the intersection of ML and Security. However, I confined myself to reaching out to advisors who work primarily in the area of Computer Vision, since that was the area I was most interested in and believed having research experience in a similar area would suffice, however that didn't work out.
• Even after having almost 2 years of research experience, I don't have any publications yet. Could this also be viewed as a red flag? At my current role as a post-bacc RA the progress has been pretty limited as the lab and the students are pretty new as well as because I wasn't able to drive the projects forward myself as I stayed occupied working on applications until February of this year.

Other than working harder and pushing for a couple of publications or at least submissions by the time the next deadlines hit, I plan on trying to reach out to my previous advisors again, maybe through the PhD student I worked with for letters. Another thing I can do is to reach out to potential advisors who work in an area more closely related to the one I have experience in.
Should I bother applying to US universities as I am an international applicant coming from a not very well known university, as I have noticed most good schools prefer students who come from traditionally well known schools? I believe despite my research experience at top universities in my country as well as the US, my alma-mater 'tag' could hold me back? My future goal is to do a PhD, so I would need some sort of financial aid (in the form of Research assistantships maybe as I work on my Masters thesis) so I won't have to worry about paying back my loans when I am applying for PhD programs.
Any advice or critique I get would be much appreciated. Thanks!

First of all, this community has tremendously helped me with my first pet loss. I dont think i could have handle this if i havent read many related examples and sympathy.
I still have insomnia,and my appetite is non-existent even when i tried to eat. I still couldnt look at her photos yet. Thinking about my old lady, or just a passing vision brings tear to my eyes and sometime heavy guilt kicks in, but living in spiritual household does makes thing slightly bearable. My mother bought offerings and lighted some incenses,asking any higher beings to take care of her.I cry wrote her letters and burned them off, i think it helps me process with the heart break
My surviving cats, non detached as they are, exhibits grieving too. I almost broke down when i saw my other 9 years old cat sniffing the coat i wrapped my old lady with the day she left,and he looked so confused and let out some low meow. He's been taking a lot of nap more than usual and always look sad when he is awake. My youngest cat is restless,a lot clingier and now sleeping in the spot the old lady likes.They eat less than before and prefer to maintain the 3 bowls, and they never finished their food, just like when my old lady was here she would finish for them. I dont know how to make them eat more. It's a bittersweet feeling.It pained me that i couldnt let them havr closure with their sister.
I miss my old lady, but now the grief is mix with this doomed feeling. Im scared of the other 9 years old cat's impending leave and has been anxiously watched over him. He suddenly developed a limp on his hind leg and lose weight, making me even more restless,doom searching his symptoms. I had the vet check him, he is very healthy inside tho they suspected arthitis but the Xray machine is broken so i couldnt get a proper confirmation. I dont know, i just feel dread thinking about what could happened to him. The old lady' passing was too traumatic for me, i dont know if i can handle anything like that again. Im not prepared yet

Negation Ability: UnExpected
Voluntary Activation Type
Self Targeting
This ability negates expectations. If another person expects something related directly to the User, they can then negate that expectation and have something else happen.
Examples-

• Enemy expects an Attack from above, suddenly the attack some from underground.
  
• Enemy expects the attack to come from Above or Below, it comes from behind
  
• Enemy expects the attack from any angle whatsoever, and the attack never comes. Until they drop their guard and it comes.
  
• User is presumed Dead and they ate no longer expected, suddenly they are alive Again and the attack comes.
  

If you haven't noticed by now this is based on Suprise Attack, from Mobo's series of shorts, Unknown Superheroes
He is literally immortal. As long as somebody isn't expecting him, he will never die. He dies nearly every single episode, but always comes back to life because "they didn't expect me to come back to life" or "they expected that I would come back to life so they assumed I wouldn't come back to life, so I did come back to life"
His power is awesome and I love them, even if he is a joke character.