Instruction codeine unadilla

Hey all. I’m not sure if you remember my previous post about exhaustion post-attack. I’m waiting to get a surgery date, and I had a biliary colic episode so bad that I went to A&E on Friday. This episode started last Monday (8days ago). I am trying my best to “ease back into eating” as per the doctor’s instructions, and I’m trying to wean off of the codeine he prescribed. However, I have NFI what I should be eating. Plain noodles seem to be fine, and vegetable soup, and even my homemade chicken noodle soup. I’m still only managing around 1000cals a day. But like, a banana set me off this morning. A BANANA. So I’m back on the codeine until this settles down. I’m so frustrated and in so much pain. I don’t know if I can hold out until July (when my initial appt with the consultant is). I’ll be trying to go through our private insurance as well but I’m not holding out hope. (I’m in the UK).
Does anyone have any tips or help or recommendations to offer? Please?

This is LONG! But I found this sort of thing very helpful to read when others posted so I want to give a bit back now. This is the first time I've ever been in hospital for any sort of procedure so I didn't know what to expect, and reading other people's experiences made me less fearful than I would have been.
The basics:
Caucasian 49f, 5' 8"/173cm tall, wearing a correctly fitting UK 34H bra before surgery. Aiming for a 34D (my preference) or DD (what my surgeon thinks is achievable). Surgeon advised that an FNG will be necessary because my natural breasts are a bit too long to safely move the nipples without detaching them first.
Private procedure, private hospital in New Zealand. I have no insurance coverage for this and am not eligible to have it on the public health system due to having no serious problems leading up to this. I don't even have back pain. All credit to my Panache Tango bras which have kept everything supported and contained for many years now.
Sunday 21 April:
8pm: Finished dinner. No more food now until after my surgery although water is allowed until 5am. I thought I'd be really nervous and unable to sleep, but actually I went to sleep no bother.
Other than not eating or drinking in the hours beforehand I had no pre-surgery instructions except to cease any sort of self-medication or taking supplements for two weeks in advance of surgery.
Monday 22 April (surgery day):
Pre surgery
4am: woke up for a pee, had a few sips of water, then went back to sleep
6am: alarm woke me up. Had a shower and changed into my going-to-hospital clothes. I was glad that I'd planned ahead and thrown a tea towel over the kettle so I didn't make myself a morning coffee on autopilot!
6:30am: my friend came to pick me up to go to the hospital. I had planned to walk myself there but he wouldn't hear of it and in the end it was nice to not be walking alone in the dark for 45 minutes.
6:45am: arrived at hospital, gave my friend one last squishy-boob hug, and went in. I was a bit apprehensive but not too bad. I used box breathing to keep my body calm.
7:00am: nurse escorted me upstairs to have my pre-op consultation. This involved going over my health (good), allergies (none), existing medications (none), and what to expect from the surgery process. There were no tests other than checking my height and weight, which confirmed that my pre-surgery stress eating has definitely had an impact! No pee tests, no blood tests. She asked could I be pregnant, I said definitely not, and that was the end of that line of questioning.
7:15am: nurse gave me a block of foam infused with antiseptic soap, and instructions to wash my torso and under my arms at the sink before changing into the hospital gown and dressing-gown and compression stockings that she provided. She had already left the room before I realised that I didn't know if I was meant to rinse off the soap, and the packet didn't give that level of instruction, so I just towel-dried myself and the soap turned the towel pink. Oops.
7:30am: anaesthetist came in to talk to me. Went over my health/allergies/medications again, and he also had me move my head and mouth in various ways to make sure there'd be no issue with getting a breathing tube in there or whatever else he might want to do. I told him I was very nervous about getting the IV needle inserted, so he offered to give me gas first and I gratefully accepted. He also gave me an anti-nausea patch to stick just below my right ear, and a couple of sedative tablets to settle my nerves. I have a history of my brain overriding sedative tablets, probably due to all the adrenaline in my system when I'm anticipating being jabbed with a needle, but I took them anyway because I was so thirsty that I wanted the little cup of water that arrived to wash down the tablets with.
7:40am: my surgeon came in with his indelible marker (an office supply bog-standard marker, which I found very amusing as it was so very ordinary and not like a special surgical tool) to mark me up. We confirmed what size I would like to be after surgery, a D cup or thereabouts, and he marked all the places where he would cut and sew me and drew a few other things on my skin to remind himself of what to do. He did this while I was standing up. He used a wire template for the new areola/nipple area on each breast so they will be the same size and shape after surgery. The nipples will be a lot higher than what nature provided for me!
7:45am: another nurse came in and helped me to settle into a trolley bed, and tucked me in under a nice smooth sheet and a lovely self-warming blanket so I was cosy and relaxed.
8:00am: the nurse wheeled me to theatre. At no point did I notice any effects of the sedative and I was sitting up on my elbows as we travelled so I could see where we were going. We arrived into a clean, modern-looking operating theatre with a feature wall and lots of people and machinery. I scooted over from my trolley onto the operating table and lay down. People fussed over machinery (as the anaesthetist said, it was like the sudden flurry of activity when an F1 car comes in to have tyres changed). Somebody put calf pumps on my lower legs to keep blood flow moving during and after surgery. The anaesthetist put a mask over my nose and mouth, and poked me in the corner of the eye as he did so which I didn't enjoy very much, but before I had time to protest he was instructing me to puff out all the air in my lungs and then breathe in enough to deflate all the air in the gas bag attached to the mask. I did so and felt very claustrophobic immediately because my brain and body could tell that it wasn't normal air I was breathing. It was heavy and smelled unpleasant and all my natural instincts were telling me to get away from the poison. Thankfully this didn't last long, because by the time I started drawing my second breath I could already tell that it was working. I don't remember finishing the second breath or anything after that.
Post surgery
10:20am: I woke up in a recovery ward and it took a moment to remember where I was or what I was doing there, as I'd been having pleasant dreams up to that point. I asked the nurse what time it was, which is how I knew the time. She said that everything had gone well and she gave me an ice block which went down very nicely. I was in no pain or discomfort but I was in and out of sleep - I actually woke myself up snoring at one point because of course I was on my back. My surgeon came in and said everything went perfectly and I didn't even need the FNG in the end. I asked how much weight he took off and he said 1.1kg from my right breast and 850g from my left, so almost 2kg or 4.4lb in total.
11am ish: at some point I was moved to my own private room but I don't remember this. I feel like I was awake at the time but I just can't remember any details now. I woke up again in bed with the calf pumps working away on my lower legs and a drain coming out of each side of my ribcage to drain fluid into bottles on the floor on each side of the bed.
My incisions were all taped up so nothing was visible. There was also a wide tape across my upper chest which gave lots of support. My nipples had no feeling in them but that is normal for my body, and they had blood supply and were reacting to changes of temperature or sensation so that's all looking really good.
11:30am: by now I was mostly awake and taking selfies with my phone. My "emergency contact" friend came to visit, as the hospital had phoned her to say I was out of surgery, so that was a nice surprise. I was probably not making a great deal of coherent sense yet but I remember talking to her and also flashing her because I wanted to show off my new boobies!
1:30pm: time for lunch, which turned out to be a selection of finger sandwiches, a bowl of fruit salad, and a glass of orange juice. Perfect!
A nurse helped me to the toilet, as I needed to have my calf pumps temporarily disconnected before I could get out of bed. Being upright and mobile was no problem, and I was glad that I'd practised so many squats before surgery because I could easily lower myself to put the drain collector jars on the floor and then pick them up again after I'd washed my hands.
The rest of Monday was me having hourly nurse checks for the first four hours, then four-hourly for the rest of my stay, and eating delicious food. Dinner was a sweetcorn and coconut chowder followed by beef brisket with mashed potato and salad, and a blueberry and lemon cobbler for dessert. I had an evening supper of cheese and crackers.
I received IV antibiotics through the peripheral IV port in my left wrist. This port was the only really uncomfortable part of my whole experience and definitely gave me more pain overall than anything else. I was given alternating codeine and paracetamol to keep my pain manageable, but there was almost no pain the majority of the time and I never rated it higher than 2 out of 10 apart from that IV port.
Another friend came to visit that evening, which was very welcome. I hadn't told many people that I was having this surgery so I wasn't expecting any visitors, but it was really nice to see familiar faces and to have them see that I was in great form!
Tuesday (1 day post op)
After being woken at midnight and again at 4am for checks, I gave up on getting much sleep (but also didn't feel very tired), so I pressed my call button at 5:30am and summoned sandwiches and a mug of tea. Breakfast proper, muesli and toast and yoghurt and a pot of coffee, arrived at 7am.
My drains had drained almost nothing in the past 24 hours, so it was no surprise when my surgeon visited and said that I was cleared to have them taken out and to go home. He said I'd have a blood test before leaving and I immediately got extremely anxious as there had been no mention of any blood tests before this point so I wasn't at all prepared. After some discussion he said that, as it was only a routine check that he does for all his patients and he had no particular concerns about me, we could skip that. He said that I might be a touch anaemic but I didn't lose much blood during surgery so it's probably not a big deal. I eat a lot of red meat anyway so I think that will sort itself out without any intervention.
By 9.30am I had the calf pumps off and was getting ready to be discharged. The nurse came to give me more intravenous medication of some sort, this time injected directly into the IV port rather than dripped in from a bag. First she flushed the port with saline, which was fine, then injected the medication, which was fine, then she followed up with another saline flush which was really painful. It felt like she was jabbing me with a needle. I loudly protested so she had another couple of attempts but with the same painful result each time. Then she brought in a different nurse who had a go, but I was almost crying with pain and eventually they stopped. I don't know what changed and they could not offer any explanation, but I assume the needle implanted in my wrist got moved somehow after the medication and before the second saline flush. Thank goodness they decided to just let it go as they'd got a couple of ml of saline in there already so the medication was probably all in me as it should be.
After this drama I was glad to lie and rest for a while. The nurse gave me some codeine before having my drains taken out; I had the choice of one drain at a time or both at once, so I chose both at once and a pair of nurses had them whipped out in no time. They taped up the drain sites and then I could have a shower, although it was really more of a flannel bath because the shower head was at waist height. That was fine and it was lovely to freshen up with my own Fenjal shower gel and put on some moisturiser.
Last step before being released was to have that IV port removed. I was so glad to see it go. After that, my friend came to collect me, we went by the pharmacy to pick up my prescriptions (codeine, laxative, and anti-inflammatory tablets) and off home. I felt alert, mobile, almost pain-free apart from some stinging in my incisions if I moved to quickly, and very much ready to go home.
This was the last day that I had any codeine. I just took paracetamol from then on. I did not experience any constipation.
Wednesday (2 days post op)
I took it very easy today. Friends came to visit in batches and I received them while lying on the sofa, and allowed them to bring me cups of tea and clean the kitchen for me. I was worn out by 6pm and went to bed early but was awake again by midnight. Then back to sleep from around 4am to 7am. I'm not in any pain but am taking paracetamol every 8 hours just to keep it that way.
Thursday (3 days post op)
I cautiously walked a couple of kilometres to the local supermarket and back, which turned out to be no problem so long as I walk gently and slowly. My underarms are very bruised from the small bit of side lipo that my surgeon does as standard, but I can easily reach up or out so long as I'm careful, and changing clothes is no problem. I don't need to wear button-front tops as I can pull a t-shirt over my head without any discomfort. I did not receive any instructions from my surgeon about how to sleep, how to move, what to avoid, or anything other than "wear a stretchy zip-front bra and do less than you think you can", so I'm listening to my body and letting it set the pace.
Saturday (5 days post op)
This is today! I am now 5 days post op and feeling great. I can easily move around the house and go out for walks, although I wouldn't want to do anything even close to strenuous just yet. Even the prospect of walking up a flight of stairs would make me think twice and then look for an elevator. Mentally I feel fine and could easily have resumed my remote WFH job by the end of the week, but it's nice to have some time to just enjoy my new body and let myself heal with no pressure.
I've been sleeping slightly raised up on a pile of pillows with a maternity pillow bolstering me on either side. This is mainly so I don't roll over on my side in my sleep. This happened twice last night so my body obviously wants to get back to normal, but it would be far too painful so I'll stick with the pillow nest for the time being.
My chest is starting to get itchy now so things are definitely healing. I'll be taking a daily antihistamine tablet from now until whenever that stops being so annoying!
EDIT
Thursday (10 days post op)
Today is day 10 post op for me, so I obediently trotted along to my surgeon's rooms to have my original dressings removed and replaced with Mefix tape. Everything is healing perfectly and there are no concerns either from me or from the surgeon. On the way home I stopped off to do some clothes shopping and was trying on tops and dresses that are three to four sizes down from what I was wearing a fortnight ago. It's amazing.
SECOND EDIT Three weeks post op At 3WPO I had another appointment to have the Mefix tapes checked and changed. The nurse is very pleased with how the incisions are healing and there are no openings. When these tapes come off I'll replace them myself with Micropore for scar management. I'm feeling great, have a full range of motion, and have just started cautiously sleeping on my side again, supported by pillows.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk, LOL. Feel free to ask any questions!

29M
Below is my journey of events over the past 8-10 years.
Symptoms
Fatigue, Seems to be better now that I am getting good rest at night.
Daytime Drowsiness
Upper back pain (been to several chiropractors it will get better short term maybe hours to 2 days but never fixed)
Lower back pain
Buttock pain. Inner and outer muscle pain. (I’ve had several rounds of dry needling to fix this. Works for a few days then it comes back.)
Tailbone pain. Related to buttock muscular pain. Again dry needling helps for a few days. But always returns.
Neck pain. Usually worse when stressed or over worked.
Mid back pain same as upper back.
Recently I have began to have pain in my hands. Starting with my right thumb then left thumb then every finger. Just like a feeling of pressure in the joint.
Meds
Currently taking
Morning ---- Tylenol 3 w/ Codeine, Methocarbamol 750mg, Phentermine 37.5, indomethacin 25mg
Mid day ---- another indomethacin 25mg, possibly another pain pill if its very bad but most of the time not
Late evening --- Indomethacin 25mg, Gabapentin 300mg, and two Tylenol Pm’s to sleep.
Imaging reports
Lumbar spine lumbar 3 view report impression shows no acute bony abnormalities, L5 spondylolysis with grade 1 anterolisthesis and mild disc space narrowing at l5-S1
XR Spine cervical 3 view, impression shows no acute bony abnormalities or significant degenerative changes, facet and uncovertebral joints are unremarkable.
Mri sacroiliac joints, peMs/sacrum without contrast
no sacrococcygeal fracture, mass or soft tissue udemas identified, piriformis muscles are symmetric and unremarkable. Sciatic nerves are unremarkable. The lowest coccygeal segment is subluxed 2mm anterior to the 2nd lowest coccygeal segment. No sacreal foraminal narrowing seen. Piriformis muscles are symmetric and unremarkable.
My issues with this all started in 2017 I was seeing a pa in my hometown I went to her to as my primary doctor. I began having fatigue while under her care and began to run blood work for a few things such as testosterone, and all the normal areas to look. At that time I had a lower than usual cortisol (am cortisol I believe which I later found out was due to being on oral steroids at the time. She began giving me a skinny pill which to my knowledge was a compounded weight loss pill similar to phentermine. After a while on this and still having constant daily fatigue along with back pain and general pain.
She sent me to an endocrinologist. He ran most of the same tests and said I didn’t have any endocrine issues. Julie moved back to her home town sometime around 2019.
Then I began seeing another PCP in my hometown. Carrying along the same symptoms. We did all of the same blood work as before and came up with the same result that there’s no issues that blood work shows. Other than a slightly low vitamin D which I was advised to take a supplement for.
At one point I began seeing a hormone doctor that my mother recommended going to in a neighboring city. She had a different approach at looking at labs and such. She was convinced that i had a thyroid problem and put me on thyroid medicine.
While seeing her I decided to go to another endocrinologist in Houston. Which listened to all of my complaints and looked at bloodwork and quickly told me he couldn’t help me but to immediately stop taking the thyroid medication because I didn’t need it. So I stopped that as I was instructed then I was back to square one again.
At this point I began getting frustrated with the medical system and not finding the answers I so desperately seek. So I put up with it. Then my mother wondered if it could be heart related. I have these flutters or palpitations that occur every once in a while that my grandfather had as well. More than likely it is anxiety however I made an appointment with a cardiologist that our family uses. He didn’t see any issues blood pressure was good but wanted to do a costly echocardiogram to rule anything out. Everything was fine there as well.
Recently I had a viral virus of some sort and was given an antibiotic and a dose of steroids. I got the steroids later in the evening and immediately took two. I woke up the next morning feel refreshed and ready to go which I haven’t experienced since I can remember. Suddenly all of my issues were minor. I had plenty of energy and no pain to speak of. My pain threshold is very high and when I say I’m hurting I’m hurting. I did have some of the emotional or mental side effects while using the steroid but it was a small price to pay for feeling so Alive and well. Hopefully this gives you some insight into what the last 7 years have been like.
After taking all of this into my pcp’s office and pleading for help. She decided to put me on Cymbalta for a diagnosis of fibromyalgia. She said that I had went to all of the doctors I should have went to without any answers. I started taking this and immediately made a appt with another rheumatologist. I was able to get a rheumatologist the next week. He put me back on prednisone 20mg a day to get me through the Houston rodeo Cookoff while he ran other blood work. After rodeo I went back in for a follow up where he said my blood work was all normal and prescribed me sulfasalazine as a medical trial to see if I had any relief. After 3 days of being on it my fatigue level went through the roof after 15 days the fatigue is horrible even taking 15 mg of prednisone with it. My pain medicine also seems to not be effective any longer. This leads me to believe that either it’s just not a fit for me or it’s something totally different. I would say the fatigue is probably 40-50% worse. I have slept roughly 18 hrs out of the last 24 hrs. His office basically just tells me it takes time to work and to be patient. But the quality of life is horrible at this point in time. I just can’t help but think that something has been missed along the way. Fatigue has always been my #1 complaint.
I stuck with sulfasalazine for the whole 5 weeks even with symptoms getting worse at 3 weeks. I had upper abdominal pain after a meal to the point I would have to make myself throw up. And the fatigue was still horrible. I accidentally missed a dose one evening and I immediately woke up feeling better. In my mind I knew it had to be this medicine. So I decided to not take it that morning either just to see. I felt a lot better. I called the doctors office where I left a message with what I described above. The PA sent a message through the front desk staff that she agreed and to stop the medicine until I see him which was 3 days away. My last visit with this rheumatologist basically consisted of him accusing me of changing my medicine without talking to him which every time I called I asked to speak to him which resulted in talking to a pa each time. He also thought I was afraid of medicine etc. Very confrontational. At this time he put me on hydroxychloroquine 300mg. I knew that I needed to seek a second opinion.
I made a appt with another rheumatologist that a family friend had seen and loved. After looking at my labs and talking with me she didn’t think I had Ankylosing Spondylitis. She recommended seeking treatment from a pain clinic.
Fast forward to recently. Pain has been manageable and I am not taking hydroxy chloroquine. And continue to take my normal medicine (Tylenol 3, methocarbamol, Wellbutrin, and phentermine daily) a friend that has gout asked me if I had ever been tested for gout and I said that I had my Uric acid levels tested many times but it’s been normal each time. But then I started to research it and it seems plausible. They let me try some of their indomethacin and it has helped tremendously. Now the question is what is the indomethacin treating. I know that it reduces inflammation. But what’s causing the inflammation?
I know that some of this is hard to follow but this is my medical diary of sorts that I add to and then go back and reflect on during my research for answers since its hard to keep it straight as far what has been done or tried.

So I (F23) got a grade 3 tear on 5th September 2023 while bouldering. Didn’t really get pain so much as the typical ‘pop’ associated. I limped out of the gym, somewhat knowing but in denial of what I’d done and called my boss to let them know I can’t work tonight. Head home for dinner thinking I’ll sleep on it and maybe it’ll get better. Soon realised the swelling is worse and think maybe I need to go to hospital, so we head to A and E.
Wait about 8 hours for an xray and it reveals no bone breaks. Doctor tells me they don’t think it’s anything too bad and I should be fine for my ski trip in January. Yay! I’m referred to the fracture clinic anyways to find out what it is. They send me for an MRI on 25th September and was called back to hospital to be told what the deal was on the 9th October. Find out it’s torn and I let them know straight away I’d like to go ahead and have surgery. They tell me that surgery has about a 2 month wait list.
For the whole month between tearing it and finding out I was given no advice of what to do so was resting my leg, letting it stay bent etc. This resulted in a painful few weeks of trying to extend it from pretty much 90 degrees flexion I’ve been stuck at for weeks and some very severe muscle wastage. But I got back, hit the gym, had some dips in motivation but at least built a little muscle before my surgery on 7th April 2024. Definitely not two months later lol.
A bit of background…I’m super active and live for sports. The last 2 winters before this mess I’d spent in Canada ski instructing. I spend my summers bartending and climbing/ hiking in my free time.
Anyways back to it… having had general anaesthetic before for another knee surgery I’d somewhat prepared myself for it. Last time was seamless, no negative effects from anaesthetic and in 2 weeks back to walking normally. Prepared myself some meals and froze them beforehand so I wasn’t too worried leading up to surgery. Just wanted everything to go smoothly and throw myself into recovery asap.
The last surgery I had, (10 years ago) I was a minor, I was allowed someone with me through the whole process. This time no one could be with me before the operation or in the room after until I got picked up. Sucks, but that’s the rules so I didn’t make a fuss.
Woke up in the recovery room in a bit of pain as expected, but it was dulled by the local anaesthetic they’d given me before waking up. I was given morphine for my pain until they couldn’t give any more. This brought it down to a manageable 3/10. I noticed feeling super itchy all over and nauseous so was given some anti-sickness medication through my IV, alongside an antihistamine pill for the itching. As I drifted in and out of consciousness about 45 minutes went by and I was taken back to the day unit by my nurse.
Once I was there it took maybe 15 minutes and I felt really sick, then I was - all over my floor. Apologised profusely to the poor nurse while she cleaned it up! So I sat, sipped some water and asked for some toast (just knowing once I’d eaten I was a step closer to getting home to my own bed). Could barely eat a slice but I forced it so they let me mobilise to use the loo (bed pan didn’t work no matter how hard I tried). Of course about 15 minutes later the toast came up too (thankfully I’d been left with a sick bowl this time).
Skip a few hours of sipping water and throwing up. I’ve seen my surgeon and all went well which was good to hear. Had an xray to confirm screw placement etc.
Back on the unit and around 6 hours post op they need to show me how to self-inject clexane (blood thinner) before I leave. This isn’t too eventful. Get a bunch of information explained, wishing I had someone with me to remember it all because I’m still super out of it from all the meds. I take my prescription painkillers (paracetamol and codeine) and head off home with my partner.
Get home and have some food, spicy mexican, probably not the best idea on my part as it came straight back up. And I continue to vomit water and pain meds all night. This was painful and exhausting and I felt pretty defeated.
The next day is much the same but as the stronger pain meds I was given wear off all I can take is pills. I was advised to have ibuprofen as well as my prescription if needed for pain, so I did, but this didn’t really make a dent in the pain. I make it to about 3pm, having thrown up a few times before it becomes unbearable. None of my painkillers are getting absorbed and the pain is just getting worse.
I call 111 who tell me to go back to hospital so I get my partner to take me to A and E where I can maybe get an IV for fluids and morphine since I won’t throw it up. Taken through to triage and they go through the typical assessment. They said I’ll probably get an IV (which is music to my ears knowing I’ll be out of the pain which was around a 7/10 at the time).
So… all this water I’ve been trying to sip needs to come out. I try to go to the bathroom with my partner to help. Realise the absolute agony when I try to put my leg down as it feels like my stitches are about to explode with fluid and the pain soars to a 9/10, I let out a whimper and a have a bit of a cry. Decide to just hold it for now!
Some time later I’m taken through for an assessment with the doctor. They also tell me they’ll probably set up an IV if it’s okay with me. I agree of course (they can stab me with anything at this point) as I just want to be out of the pain. I’m sent back to wait in A and E, then a bit later I’m called back through for bloods.
Maybe 10 seconds after they’ve taken the blood samples my initial doctor comes to let me know they’re sorry but they won’t be giving me an IV and they didn’t actually need the bloods. It’s clear why, they’ve got too many patients and no beds or staff to cope with it (I’m just in pain and I’m not gonna die so fair enough, just sucks for me).
They tell me they want me to try and take pills instead. I’m obviously pretty upset to hear it because I’m sleep deprived, in pain, nauseous, desperate for the toilet, and I haven’t stomached food for 2 days so I’m not super hopeful about this. But I understand and wait there an hour anyways for the same meds on my prescription alongside an anti sickness pill.
Once I’ve taken them they tell me to go sit and try to eat in the hospital cafeteria then wait for a few hours and hope it doesn’t come back up. Ideal. Thankfully, this time round it works! I head home and feel nauseous, still throwing up a bit for the next few days, being cautious about what I eat.
Skip to day 5, the pain is manageable and I’m feeling more hopeful. No more vomiting. I can make it out of my bedroom finally for a change of scenery!
Not super eventful until day 9. I get my first physio session and it goes well. They help settle a lot of concerns I have.
Since then I’ve been slowly making progress with better days and worse days of pain and amount of flexion/ extension I’m able to get with physio but overall positive progression.
Day 12 now and I’m doing okay. Still get sharp shin pain (I think this is the bone plugs/ screws) when I’m doing some things (like lifting my leg) and swelling etc but I’m coping.
I still worry about long term and if I’ll ski the same again or if I’ll be able to do sports into older age but trying to stay positive and focus on the little victories for the moment.
We’ll all get there. Thanks everyone on here for being so supportive and helping me through the worst of it. I wish everyone all the best! :)

Over the last ~3 years our area has been having an issue with a known pill mill provider, we will call Mr. Frank. Mr. Frank is a Nurse Practitioner (with a degree from the online for-profit university) who has a felony conviction for 3rd degree assault that was plead down from child abuse charge in which he nearly killed his four month old daughter. Here's a lovely excerpt the judge wrote in his subsequent divorce proceedings:
See the [REDACTED] Complaint, which provides that the treating physician’s medical assessment concluded that the reported fall did not account for severity of the child’s injury, which resulted in a subdural hematoma and cerebral edema which required the child to undergo a craniotomy.
Since his conviction, no reasonable employer will hire him- as a result he was forced to start his own practice where he began charging $400 cash for oxycodone prescriptions, for which I still have a picture of from his website before he changed it. Mr. Frank began to try and bully us in Feb 2022 after my manager and I refused to fill a prescription of oxycodone 15mg for one of his "patients". He called back and asked to speak to another manager, and then faxed us some bogus liability workup that he clearly has sent to other pharmacies before us. I began to do research and learned all of the above, as well as his surescripts eprescribing had sent prescriptions for promethazine syrup (no codeine) and sildeanfil (viagra) for fictitious patients. About this same time, surescripts sent out an email stating they inactivated his SPI to investigate suspicious or fraudulent activity. (He would later state that he requested this himself as his account was hacked). I partially believe this, but it was probably done by his employee or a patient as I'm pretty sure all Electronically prescribed controlled substances (ECPS) software suites require 2 factor authentication. I talked to other pharmacists in the area and concluded that we all felt the same way that this operation was suspicious at the least, and most likely illegal. We found other reasons based on old opiate prescribing guidelines from 2018 to refuse to dispense (based on him giving everyone more than 50mMeq daily). Those guidelines were revamped shortly after I was sued in 2022 and that particular part is no longer relevant. Another nearby pharmacist also stated Mr. Frank was having a personal bodyguard pick up prescriptions for his 'patients'. I also discovered that a person who had a prior conviction for obtaining a controlled substance by fraud or deceit and attempted to pass a fake prescription for a different provider two years earlier at our pharmacy was getting oxycodone from him- (fun fact, he was confronted about this 'patient' and still is seeing them).
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In March 2022 he sent another prescription for oxycodone for a different patient that we refused to dispense for the same reasons as before. On about March 9 or 10, he called to bully us into filling it, and I confronted him that I didn't feel comfortable dispensing oxycodone for a cash only clinic. He started saying I was making false accusations about his practice. Getting upset about being repeatedly called a liar, I told him we knew that he was a pill mill, and that he is a felon, and asked if he informed the board of that as is required. He responded with "yes I've been through this with them; I've reported dozens of pharmacists like you to the board of pharmacy-" "...well I reported you to the DEA, the Board of Nursing, and the local police department, hopefully it goes better for you than it did for this other pill mill provider or your child abuse charges". He responded with "Don't you ever fucking talk about me or my kid[s] again". I said "Did you just threaten me? I think we're done here" and hung up. I immediately notified my pharmacy manager (who was on the same page as I was) and my pharmacy supervisor. I was as transparent as possible with the whole series of events. He filed corporate complaints against me with [FORMER EMPLOYER] and with the board of pharmacy. When he requested a call back from the supervisor, Chris (pharmacist supervisor) stated he was threatening to sue us for defamation, but to not worry about it and just let my manager handle him in the future. By this point my manager and I had to speak with a BOP investigator, who said they were more than familiar with Mr. Frank and other pharmacists were dealing with similar issues. I had communicated with an assistant general counsel for [FORMER EMPLOYER] about my statement for the board of pharmacy, and the events as I recalled them (late March/ early April). at 6pm on Thursday, April 14th, 2022 my wife was served a summons and complaint at our home that I was being sued by Mr. Frank for defamation and tortious interference. I notified my supervisor immediately, and faxed the summons and complaint to the company's assistant general counsel as I was subsequently instructed. I told them I had intended to use the company counsel to tender my defense and that they would reach out to me. In a text message exchange with my brother, who is a patent attorney, he suggested I not use the company's counsel because they would throw me under the bus if it was convenient for them. I did not listen. On Tuesday, after my shift had ended I was walked back to the store director's office, sat in front of an HR supervisor I've never met, the director, Chris. They asked what I said to Mr. Frank was accurate from the complaint i submitted to the board of nursing. I said it was, then I was told "we have to part ways, at least for now..." and terminated. TWO BUSINESS DAYS after I was served.
The summons and complaint were full of incredible inaccuracies, grammatical errors, spelling errors, and lies. Plaintiff stated he was not a felon, and that I was defaming him by telling other pharmacists that he was. IT IS CLEARLY EVIDENT FROM THE PUBLICLY AVAILABLE DATABASES HE PLEAD GUILTY TO A FELONY CHARGE. I found a private attorney who specializes in litigation who is well qualified and trust to the tune of $350/hr, which is actually a good rate for his level of experience and below average rate in this market. I applied for unemployment and went on a job hunting spree. I ended up 6 weeks later signing with [Big Chain Pharmacy] for a large signing bonus to fill my 'Warchest' after not being able to find any offers outside of retail pharmacy. My unemployment was contested by [FORMER EMPLOYER], and later declined by a judge when I appealed it. The store director argued he was the only one with the power to terminate me and he was uninformed of my conversation with Mr. Frank. Had I been better prepared, I believe I would have won as I believe his claim to be a flagrant lie: any time someone makes a corporate complaint it goes straight to the store director's email inbox.
Back at my new job, I spoke with other pharmacists in the company and relayed my experience and many were familiar with Mr. Frank. Apparently he went into a store to harass pharmacy staff for refusing to fill his prescriptions. After coordinating with a few others, we submitted a request to have a narcotic prescriber block against him within the company. After 2 weeks, we were notified that he would no longer be able to have controlled substance prescriptions dispensed by our company. A 60 day grace period would be given and mail would be sent to him and his 'patients' so they could make other arrangements. In the fall, I was interviewed over zoom with the state AG office with respect to my complaint, and after being in contact with a few local DEA Drug Diversion Task Force agents. The DEA agents stated their supervisor has a mantra of not taking action against providers/professionals until after their respective board hands down disciplinary action. A little later, I was notified the Board of Pharmacy complaint filed against me was dismissed.
I went through discovery and was deposed and after a little over a year, they withdrew their case with prejudice. The reason: plaintiff says I was defaming him by saying he was going over 50mMeq daily for all his patients. We said we would need patient information to confirm or deny that, and would need a protective order, to which his attorney agreed. Plaintiff refused to provide that information, citing HIPAA. We went to the judge and got an order to compel, which the judge agreed with. The deadline passed, and they did not provide the information (likely knowing it would immediately get handed over to the state AG's office). We went back to the judge who stated if they did not comply the court would look upon motions for sanctions and attorney's fees favorably. They continued to not comply, to which his attorney only said "i know, I'm sorry". They withdrew the case with prejudice before we were able to depose him. However, we were able to subpoena the county records in which he pleaded guilty to a felony and the board of pharmacy complaints he filed against other pharmacists and pharmacies (there were 15 in all by this time, some of which predated my involvement).
After this, I had to deal with getting my now $75,000 in legal fees back from [FORMER EMPLOYER]. Their attorneys were giddy that [FORMER EMPLOYER] was going to send their general counsel on a plane to be present for mediation. Because of this, my brother spent $2500 on a round trip flight to be present at mediation, because "this is what I'm good at". The Sunday before mediation we learned that general counsel wouldn't be there. In fact, nobody would other than their lawyers, and they had one of their attorneys who then had him available by phone. For some backstory, their VP of legal affairs and general counsel was THE FORMER CEO'S SON, who was given that position that usually requires a decade plus of experience at the age of like 32... My brother was pissed, he couldn't comp his ticket because he was co-counsel strictly to be in the fold and have privileged conversations. On top of that, they only offered 10k initially, and wouldn't agree to more than 15k after 5 hours. My brother said "this is insane, and I can't even go talk or yell at the guy because he isn't here". After 5 months of dealing with them and the mediator essentially telling them they were assured to lose, they agreed to settle for what was about 73% of my legal costs (about 25 days before our scheduled trial block would begin). There is no gag or confidentiality agreement in place, only mutual releases. Since then, nothing has happened to Frank with respect to the state AG's office, or the justice department. However, I did hear recently from a friend that [OTHER BIG CHAIN PHARMACY] is now refusing to dispense controlled substances for him. My former employer (sans my old store) continues to fill oxycodone for him, and I have been told the supervisor essentially tells pharmacists not to start trouble with him.
January 2024 update, Since then Frank's felony conviction has been reduced to a misdemeanor after completing a probationary period as a part of his initial plea deal. I recently learned that [FORMER EMPLOYER] now refuses to fill his oxycodone scripts after I settled with them.
I just wanted to let everyone know, never trust your employer. Public or Private, big or small, they won't hesitate to throw you under the bus if you become an inconvenience. Even if you have a decade of dedicated work, through the pandemic, on site covid testing, vaccine clinics that start at 3am, covering a last minute illness, personally delivering medications to notoriously unsafe neighborhoods in the dead of night, even being one of the few pharmacist trained to do nasopharyngeal swabs, and do so outside in -20F weather. They will discard you. And if you stand up for yourself, go public, or become a whistleblower, you'll become unhirable. This is why nobody does the right thing anymore.

So I took the 4 tablets vaginally on Tuesday at 12:30pm. Nothing really happened. 3 hours later I took another 2 as instructed. Some bleeding began but nothing too heavy at all really. Around 8pm that evening I did have some cramping which was comparable to period pain. I fell asleep at 11pm and slept all night with no pain and minimal bleeding. The next day I rang the clinic and explained that I was worried that it hadn't worked properly and she said because I was only 5 weeks along it can be normal to just have a period type bleed and no clotting.
All day yesterday (Thursday) I had heavy bleeding but again I've had worse periods. Then I woke up at 3am this morning with the most HORRIBLE contractions. I've had a natural birth before and I'd compare it to early labour. This went on for about 2 hours but there were no clots and the bleeding wasn't too heavy? I took 2 codeine and eventually must have fallen asleep. I woke up at 7am and the pain was gone. I'm so worried that I've messed it up and it's not worked. Has anyone else experienced this?

Hi guys.
I went for an internal scan yesterday and was 5w1d pregnant and was given the first abortion tablet. Fast forward to today at 12:30pm I took 30mg codeine and 2 nuromol, inserted the other 4 and waited... Nothing happened. I stayed led down to ensure that they didn't fall out. I inserted the other 2 at 3:30pm as instructed and at around 4:30pm some light bleeding began when I then took another 30mg of codeine. It's now 6:30pm and whilst I'm bleeding, I wouldn't say it's particularly painful or heavy, more so a medium flow. Is this because I'm dosed up or is this normal? I was expecting some serious pain and for the process to be relatively quick as I've read most peoples are done within 6 hours.. I'm hoping I haven't messed it up somehow.
Thanks

I've been reading stopdrinking for the last little while.. I had forgotten how the desperation felt, how each day felt like a battle to be sober, how I was always counting down the clock to midnight when I could go to sleep without obsessing about going out to get beer to make falling asleep easier. I forgot how terrible the relapses felt, how I felt like a failure of a human being for being unable to just not drink poison. I truly forgot what white knuckling really felt like. Reading these posts brought me back to remembering how dark things felt, on the verge of death daily.
And yet here I am, I dont really struggle not to drink, but I dont put any effort into it either and allow myself to drink if I want to. I dont want to anymore, and it doesn't feel like the doom and gloom whiteknuckling that it used to feel like. It feels like I'm missing something that could make things more fun, but not something that I need to survive. Not something to quell the withdrawals. Not something that was irresistable.
Sure, I'm only on my second day sober in what I want to be an extended break from alcohol, but it doesn't feel like the second day. It feels like any other day. Yesterday didn't feel like "omg day 1, i need to get through this day without drinking" it just felt like yet another AF day that i can have effortlessly. Sure, when the witching hour hit I then thought about drinking, I also thought about how I didn't want to walk to the store, and how I didn't want to spend money on poison. I just wanted to be sober and that was kind of that.
There is such a stark contrast in what I felt yesterday and how I used to feel day 1's were. Day 1 used to mean that I was fighting for my life. Having this kind of reminder today about how it used to feel really makes me grateful for TSM. I've put in the time and the effort and now it's paying dividends. Three years of highs, lows, long stretches of sobriety and long stretches of heavy drinking.
I wish everyone knew about and could do TSM as soon as they wanted to stop or moderate their drinking. It should be like Tylenol with Codeine, available through a pharmacy counter but it comes with instructions on how to properly use it.

Hello, I've been in a (mostly long distance) relationship with my partner for almost two years now and I've grown a lot but I still tend to experience a few issues than are neither my or her faults
For context, yesterday we were hanging out in a call, and after trying to convey some mundane message (small talk) for about a minute or so, she asked me repeat from scratch as she was spacing out the whole time and it made me despair, subsequently shutting down. I managed to oversimplify what I had said in that minute but it really felt pointless, as if I could never get those words back the way they were
I can't say for sure whether it was that long as I myself suffer from ADHD and I struggle understanding the flow of time as it is, or if the pain meds she was on made her space out for that long (codeine, an opioid)
Regardless, this happens frequently enough to be an issue. Whenever a mic doesn't pick up multiple times in a row or whenever we tried to explain something personal or a set of instructions to one another, and we don't understand eachother whatsoever repeatedly, I get really close to/or shut down
It's never been an issue in person, and I don't understand how to either tune it down or even understand why it happens, and I'd like some advice because when it does happen, it often ends up hurting both of us
I have a terrible upbringing as I was raised in an abusive family that would gaslit me or dismiss me whenever an issue arose, so I'm very susceptible to feeling unheard or not understood, but again this is never the case in person
How do I stop shutting down?

I (24f) wanted to do this 2nd post just incase this can help even 1 person on here. The 1st was my fear before the abortion, this is after!
Context: my last period was Feb 6th-Feb 13th, and I missed my next period by 3 days, took 3 pregnancy tests and they were all positive.
I called my local Canadian hospital and they have an abortion clinic, they booked the appointment for March 26th, 2 weeks after I called them.
Waiting was horrible because I got VERY bloated, like to the point it looked like I was showing and I was scared I was further along than I was…. In the province I live abortions are given up to 23 weeks + 6 days without question. FYI: this bloating is very normal, a lot of women can experience it and you’re not showing (it had me fooled lol and I cried so much but just waited).
The appointment: my care facility was amazing, I hope everyone’s is!! I went in with a full bladder (peed at 6 am, drank 1.5 litres of water from 7-7:30am). Had the ultrasound at around 8:15am and it was good. The technician was kind of rude so I was scared about the process, she seemed very short with me and condescending. BUT they immediately sent me for the blood work in another area, and the nurse was so kind to me. I went back to the abortion clinic side, and did a consultation with an abortion nurse, and she was also A+++, so kind. She offered me counselling from a social worker, which I declined. The clinic was dead, so when the doctor arrived at 9 I was seen right away. She was AMAZING. The vibe felt like it was going to be just another medical procedure, she didn’t talk down to me, or even have a hint of hate in her voice. The doctor made me feel so comfortable. She confirmed I was 6weeks 3 days pregnant. We ended up going with the medical abortion pills. I got all the medication at the hospital, and because of my Canadian coverage, the abortion pills were free and I only paid $5 for the pain meds (get to later).
Abortion: I took Mifepristone at 10pm on march 26th. I didn’t feel anything for the 24h! March 27th at 9pm I took 2 gravel pills, and 1 extra strength Naproxen. At 10pm, I took the 4 Misoprostol tablets cheek method (I googled a million pics lol) I stuck 2 between my bottom right gums and cheek, and 2 between my left ones. They weren’t touching my teeth. I sat for 35 mins and swallowed the rest with water. Doc warned me of bad taste, but honestly it wasn’t that bad at all. Like, just normal med chalk taste nothing like bad bad. I also took a codeine (Tylenol-3) at this time.
Around 11:30pm for me the cramping started happening, and it lasted until probably 8am March 28th. I took the codeine every 4 hours as instructed from the point of ingestion. I had the norovirus once and food poisoning twice, and the experience was exactly like that tbh. Symptoms: cramping, shakes, vomiting (was not that bad I’m being honest! Made me feel really good after tbh), and small amounts of diarrhea which wasn’t bad at all genuinely. The cramps were bad, but I will preface I have endometriosis. Not sure if any clinical data is tied to that. It is the next morning and I feel fine!! My doc did tell me I might have a faster recovery because I was only 6 weeks + 3 days. I also had over night pads I changed hourly (I was awake the whole night) but they were not soaked every time. I also wore and put them on depends/adult diapers and 100% recommend the adult diapers because I wasn’t worried about leakage.
After thoughts: the cramps were BAD I’m ngl, but it is something you can 100% get through ❤️ I promise whoever reads this you are strong enough, and I would do the experience 10X over than carrying out the pregnancy. It was worth it for me. I don’t want you going through the experience blindsided by pain, but just know that it will end ❤️. I genuinely feel like it was my experience with food poisoning tummy pains, and it was a sucky night BUT I did it , and now my future is my own to decide. You can do this if I can, you’ll be amazing. I won’t go into as much detail unless asked, but there was nothing grotesque I saw. I was early, but if you’re in my exact situation I can speak that you don’t see “anything” come out. I looked at everything on the pads. Don’t be scared.
As a Canadian I paid very little, yes I had codeine offered very cheap and I am very happy for my health care system and recognition of others is important that they cannot access these meds for free. The naproxen was over the counter and a bit more expensive, but if you’re at the position of not affordable codeine, talk to your doc about your options of over the counter meds.
You can do this ❤️❤️ good luck to everyone.

Hi everyone this is my (f19) first post actually ever, and the formatting might be a bit off since i’m on mobile, but after reading all of your experiences and how helpful all of the posts are on here i’ve read, I wanted to document my own experience too. To be honest i think this is mostly for myself as a way of recording what i experience and to keep myself sane. (sorry for how long this post will be)
So, here goes; since i was young, I have always had this deep intuitive feeling that i was infertile - as in as far back as i can remember i never thought i would be able to have children although that’s all i wanted. Long story short - i am not infertile, and now im in this situation. I have been with my boyfriend (m21) now for nearly a year and a half, and we have never used contraception (definitely regretting that now), but since he says he doesn’t like using condoms, and i was worried about going back on the birth control pill because last time it screwed up my hormones, combined with the fact i’d convinced myself i was infertile, for some reason i just never really questioned it?
Anyway, friday 8th march i did a pregnancy test when i got home from work after realising my period was a little late and i just had this feeling all day like i couldn’t stop touching my stomach? The only actual pregnancy symptoms i had are sore and tender boobs and really vivid dreams.
I did two tests that night and both were definitely positive ( very dark lines ) and i was in so much shock that i just put them straight in the bin and went to my friends house for the night. I didn’t tell anyone about it until the following Saturday evening when i told my BF, and we agreed that our only option was to have an abortion since we’re both broke students still in uni, working part time jobs as well as studying, and on top of that my mental health is up and down as it is and i couldn’t deal with the disappointment from my unsupportive parent.
So Monday came and i went to a Brook clinic to have another pregnancy test taken and get an abortion referral. The nurse i saw there was not what i was expecting, i know it’s her job and she probably has to deal with this everyday but i was sort of hoping for a little more compassion i guess? i was crying the whole time i was there and although i knew termination was my only option, it didn’t make it any easier. She essentially just said to me well you’re definitely pregnant(about 6 weeks at this point) , “you either abort it or become a parent at 19”. I asked for an abortion referral and she gave me a number to call for a Central Booking Service which i think is for BPAS and MSI.
After a couple of phone calls with really nice ladies from MSI just basically asking medical questions and my reason for wanting a termination, i decided on MA mostly because of my intense fear of needles i didn’t think i could handle SA - and by Saturday 16th March the parcel came containing 1 mifepristone, 6 tablets of misoprostol, some codeine, 3 months worth of the mini pill (at my request), and two condoms, and a booklet with all the instructions and information.
I took the first pill which ends the pregnancy yesterday (tuesday 19th march) at 11:50am, pretty much all day i was fine, until about 8pm i got my first bit of cramping, which was sore but nothing worse than a period cramp, and it soon eased after taking 2 paracetamol. At about 8:45pm i went to the toilet and i had bled a little, but it was nothing major. My BF and i just had a nice evening to keep me calm and distracted, did a little bit of painting and cooked a nice meal etc.
Then at around 11:30pm I had another bout of cramping, this time a little more painful than last, but still not worse that periods i’d had before - and i just took another 2 paracetamol and had a hot water bottle on my abdomen which really helped. It went away and i went to sleep.
Woke up this morning, with again just a little bleeding throughout the night - but when i used the toilet i did pass a couple of very small clots (similar to the kind you’d see on your period).
I have taken the first 4 misoprostol today at 1:35pm (vaginally due to supposedly less side effects) after taking two ibruprofen and two paracetamol. It is now 2:15pm and i have yet to experience anything apart from maybe some very very light cramping (more along the lines of minor discomfort). My plan is to keep updating this as i go along.
My BF is here with me all day to look after me and give me support, and my best friend brought me some supplies and will be joining us when she finishes work later. I haven’t told anyone else what i’m doing and don’t plan on doing so.
Despite how difficult this has been on me mentally, I do still feel incredibly lucky to have the support i’ve had, but mostly that i even have the opportunity to make my decision and do so safely and legally - the world is becoming an increasingly scarier place for us.
Anyway, I’ll let you know how i get on!
Update (7:55pm) -
I took the remaining 2 miso pills at around 4:55pm after really not much happening from the first 4, apart from the same mild cramping and i passed a couple more small clots - the biggest thing i felt from the first 4 miso was just very drowsy and a little woozy like i wasn’t really “with it” (although that could have been the pain meds too i guess).
From the next lot of pills, i started feeling some stronger pain in my abdomen about half an hour ago, and when i went to the toilet i passed a couple of larger clots, but still not much bleeding at all. Cramping is still here and i’ve taken some more pain meds, but i haven’t had to use the codeine MSI provided yet.
update - so, i wasnt the best at keeping this well updated - its now Saturday. The past few days have been really difficult. Physically, i was so exhausted, i could barely make it downstairs and back without being drowsy. overall the cramps werent that bad though, they were painful but they were only in 20 mins bursts at a time, and at most it was one cramping at every few hours.
But, i have never felt this kind of emotion before in my life. i feel like the guilt is neverending. I feel so sad. Like im grieving for something i never had, yet at the same time im so relieved. i feel grateful knowing that i can carry on with my life. It's shown me the true value in my amazing bf and bestfriend who have been with me through it. I think when the bleeding stops i will feel better. seeing it everytime i pee reminds me all over again what im doing.
Anyway, sorry for the poor updates, and for how long this post is - i actually think ive just done this for myself really, the only place i can really say what i'm thinking. :)

Hi all my dad has his surgery last week. He’s been given 20 enoxaparin injections. But tonight he struggled to take the injections said he was in so much pain
His stomach is still bloated from the robotic surgery and had incisions. I don’t want to hurt him. The nurse gave us a 20 second tutorial and go onto YouTube.
He was on codeine and paracetamol so before the injection he was in less pain. Now the codeine has run out it’s just paracetamol.
Anyone UK based have you been able to get an alternative like a tablet instead of the injections? His stomach is so stretched there is nothing to pinch. He lies down as instructed by the nurse. Any help or support really appreciated. I’ve been crying not being able to take this shit situation away or make it as comfortable as possible for him

Hello,
As I (26F) am writing this, I am in the process of having a MA. In the run up to this, I spent a long time reading through every single experience post on here and I cannot explain how grateful I am to the people who posted their stories. Nothing eased my worries like reading how other people got through the same thing. Because of that I wanted to post my in-depth experience in the hope that it can help someone else.
For context, I am in the UK.
I found out exactly one week ago that I was pregnant, on the day my period should have started. I will not go into my personal circumstances, only that termination was my immediate choice and that I have no regrets. Also that I did this process entirely alone. My sister does live nearby, and although I didn't tell her about this procedure I knew that I would have someone able to come and assist if I ran into difficulty.
Because I found out on a Sunday, I had to wait until 8am the next morning to phone the local sexual health clinic (they are the abortion provider in my local council area). I got through and was told I would receive a call back the next day to discuss options and to have my assessment.
Got the call at 6pm the next day (Tuesday). The lady was wonderful. She was caring, compassionate and informative. She gave me the option of having an MA at home or in the hospital. I chose at home although it was nice to have the option (I didn't realise it would be an option in hospital since I was so early along but apparently it was). She asked if I would be happy with getting an STI screen done on the day I picked up the pills, just to prevent any chance of infection. I said that was fine and was booked to go to the clinic at 1pm on Friday. I was offered counselling if I wanted to wait and talk over my options, or even just talk to someone for support but I declined as I felt confident in my choice. She stressed that the option was there prior to Friday, and afterwards if I changed my mind, which I appreciated.
Friday - 1pm. Arrived at the clinic and only waited for 2 minutes before I was called in. Again, the nurse was extremely kind and put me at ease. I was given the swab to do myself in the bathroom and give back to her. She said I would only be contacted if anything came out positive and if I hadn't heard back in 10 days it was all good. She then gave me a LARGE pack (I was not expecting it to be this big!) but it was totally discreet and just wrapped up like a delivery parcel. Inside was:
1 x mifepristone
6 x misoprostol
3 x cyclizine (anti-nausea tablets)
5 x dihydrocodeine (strong painkillers)
6 months of my choice of birth control pill (the one I have been on for the last few years)
A pack of 12 ultra absorbant pads.
A pack of standard fit condoms.
There was three booklets inside - one general information booklet called 'abortion services information' which set out the three options (MA at home, MA at hospital, SA) and also excellent resources in terms of counselling, helpline numbers, urgent advice and things to look out for. There was a booklet specifically about the EMAH and what to expect. The third was a sheet of paper with the exact instructions for taking the medication, which seemed to be tailored based on when my appointment at the clinic was (ie, I had indicated I wanted to start the process immediately, and the instructions were then based on that).
The entire time at the clinic was about 10 minutes - everyone was lovely and at no point did I feel judged.
My instructions were - mifoprostrene immediately, along with an anti nausea to be safe. Nothing on Saturday. Four Miso inserted vaginally at 8am on Sunday (with the option of taking a codeine and nausea tablet half an hour before). Then two Miso under the tongue for 30 minutes at midday on Sunday.
In preparation I had an electric blanket, ibruprofen and some bland snacks. Also a lot of flavoured water to help with the taste in case I threw up.
My timeline went:
Friday at 2pm - took the mifoprostrene and an anti nausea tablet. I felt no side effects from this at all and did not experience any bleeding.
Saturday - no side effects, went about my day happily.
Sunday 7:45am - took a codeine and an anti nausea pill along with two paracetemol. In hindsight I am not sure this was necessary at this stage because all it did was knock me out for the next two hours.
Sunday 8am - inserted the four miso vaginally. Then slept on and off for the next two hours with the electric blanket. I didn't experience any pain during this time, but wow did the painkillers make me tired.
Sunday 10:30am - I started to experience slight cramping but absolutely nothing that I would describe as painful. It almost felt like I was just very full, is the only way to describe it. Like a pressure around my abdomen and back.
Sunday 11:15am - the pain suddenly ramped up and I got pretty dizzy. I went to the bathroom and was immediately sick (thankfully I had only been drinking flavoured water and grapes). I then sat on the toilet for the next 15 minutes and pushing seemed to ease the pain. The pain stopped quite suddenly, honestly I would say after about 10 minutes, but I stayed on the toilet because I still hadn't actually bled yet. Maybe TMI, but at this point two pretty small clots came out along with a bit of blood. Nothing major at all.
Sunday 11:30am-midday. I was getting a bit worried because I only had a very small amount of bright red blood on my pad. I had to take the final two Miso at midday so before that I took another codeine (at this point I wasn't sure if the brief 15 minutes of pain I had was just a precursor for worse to come). I was pretty worried that I was going to throw up the Miso because of the nausea but it was fine. Just in case I had some plain toast and yoghurt.
Sunday midday - popped the two tablets under my tongue. They didn't taste of anything and I kept them down, the nausea had subsided .
Sunday - 1230pm - the tablets had barely dissolved but apparently that's fine so I just swallowed the remnants with some water. I then fell asleep for an hour (probably because of the codeine and electric blanket). One thing I did find was that I could not stop shivering for about an hour. I was fine when I was under the covers but when I went to the toilet (I went every 15 minutes or so because nothing seemed to be happening unless I let gravity help it along) my teeth were chattering.
Sunday - 13:30pm - I've read so many descriptions of extremely heavy bleeding and pain. That just isn't what I had - this could be for a variety of reasons, maybe because I was so early in the pregnancy and maybe because I have extremely light periods, but by this point I was only bleeding if I was actively on the toilet. There had been a few small clots, and the cramping was non existent. Maybe a bit tender and 'full' is the only way to describe it, again with a vague pressure in my lower back. The shivering was still ongoing and I got occasional nausea but I just laid in bed and watched a movie.
Sunday 15:15pm - I went and passed another maybe 2 very small clots (there's still next to no blood on my pad at this point from when I've been lying down) and I think being out of bed and being cold made me nauseous again to I threw up for the second time. I still wasn't really actively bleeding unless a small clot came out when I'm on the toilet and even then, it was gone as soon as I wiped.
Sunday 17:00pm - it's been 9 hours since I started this process. Was sick again but the nausea comes on really quickly and passed immediately once I throw up. Still absolute minimal cramping. One thing I noticed is that I feel very dehydrated - I'm going through water at a pretty intense rate and my mouth is dry, possibly a residual effect from the oral tablets.
Sunday 18:00pm. At the ten hour mark now and I think I will leave it here. It's hard to say if the process worked - I've had extremely minimal bleeding, other than when I was actively on the toilet pushing. I don't think much else is going to change from here on out. I feel well enough to make some dinner and have a shower.
Overall - I had maybe two hours at the 4-5 hours mark where I was uncomfortable, mostly from the shivering and nausea, as opposed to the cramping. The pain medication, drinking lots of water and having the electric blanket seemed to ease the entire thing. As I said, it's hard to tell if the process has worked - there has certainly been clots but they have been small and the bleeding is nowhere near what I was anticipating. Throughout the whole process, I used one pad so far. There is a number to call on the booklets if I have concerns, which I may do in the next few days if the bleeding doesn't ramp up but it could well be that I have just been very lucky with my experience (due to being so early along and having light periods).
The NHS is a gift - it's been one week since I found out about this pregnancy and the entire process has cost nothing. If it turns out the process didn't work and I need an SA I will update but I hope this has provided some insight to those in the UK looking for stories of the experience. I'm happy to answer any questions too, since I know that I had a lot before starting this.

*Disclaimer: I am not a doctor. I just read a lot.
I'm not sure what the status of it is in the US, but in Australia it seemed to have been approved by the TGA in late 2022 and is relatively unheard of. I work in pharmacy (though not as a pharmacist), and have never heard of or come across this medication. From what I can see, a few people over the past few days have asked similar questions as they must have also seen it in the news as a new treatment option. This treatment option also seems to be directed at people with fibroids.
The idea appears to be that one of the active ingredients (relugolix) is a GnRH agonist similar to nafarelin (Synarel) or goserelin (Zoladex), which slows and stops your own sex hormone production. But on top of being an oral form of this type of drug, unlike the others it also replaces a small amount of your hormones (with estradiol and norethisterone) so that they're not non existent, but there in controlled quantities.
So while it SOUNDS similar to birth control, that's not its primary function. The key factor to take away is that it contains a GnRH agonist to reduce overly high levels of estrogen (which inevitably reduces other sex hormones due to acting on the ovaries and pituitary gland), and then replace the lack of hormones with controlled levels so you reap the benefits of having less estrogen dominance (which slows the growth of endometriosis), but avoid side effects of being completed depleted of these hormones such as in the case of other GnRH agonist drugs which make them non-viable long term treatment options. From what I've read it would appear to have less risk of bone density issues due to this hormone replacement, and it may be viable as a long term treatment option compared to some of the other similar medications. On the Australian CMI, one of the indications listed for this medication is for people who have experienced surgical intervention for endometriosis in order to manage symptoms (and possibly prevent some regrowth).
I have been on Synarel (a nasal spray, which can have issues of not being used with proper technique), but it didn't seem to be working for me, so I moved onto Zoladex (the pellet injection). This was in preparation for surgery which I'm having in two days. It had more of an effect but not to the point of menopausal symptoms, and it gave me quite unpleasant side effects so I've already had my last dose but not completed the 6 month course per my specialist's instructions.
Following my surgery, I think I may bring it up with my specialist to find out whether it is something that may be of benefit to me, and also because I am curious about this seemingly new (and maybe promising?) drug.
The only thing is that it looks to be an expensive prescription, as it is not subsidised by the PBS here in Australia, which can be common for new drugs. $135 a month apparently, which is a bit brutal. Hopefully that changes though.
Part of why I would like to know as well is because pain meds don't seem to help me. I was on prescription anti-inflammatories to the point of developing a stomach ulcer so I had to stop them, and while they regulated irregular bleeding here and there (I also have PCOS), it didn't do so much for the actual pain. I've also been prescribed opioids including fairly run-of-the-mill codeine, as well as oxycodone, but I have no reaction to these at all. The hypothesis by all my health professionals is that I must have a gene which prevents me from properly metabolising opioids, so I don't get to properly experience their pain killing properties (unless I am dosed up to high heaven in significantly stronger, more active opioids in hospital). Most doctors are hesitant to prescribe anything stronger than oxycodone, which I do understand, but it's hard. So that is all very fun, and I often feel very helpless about the pain as a result.
Thank you to reading this far if you have. I don't tend to post here, as I'm more of a lurker.
Has anyone tried Ryeqo? If so, what is your experience? Has it helped with pain reduction?
And as a side question - for people who don't get relief from stronger pain medicines, have you found any other forms of pain relief?

i posted over the last couple of days about unfortunately getting hit with some dental pains. its been rough. taking painkillers to help, eating hasnt hurt at all so thats fine. ive been using paracetamol, ibuprofen, and if its really bad, paracetamol and codeine. i have some toothache gels too that i mixed with mouthwash and used on the painful parts (thoroughly spitting after as im paranoid about the clove oil) anyway-im in bed right now and i just took my meds (not pain ones, just my daily meds) and i started feeling slightly n*. i had a tooth infection before that lead to dry heaving and im always worried it'll happen again (despite the pain being completely different, unaffected by eating and no other symptoms of infection) i have a pretty bad history with dentists and a lot of trauma i dont feel like detailing here, so please dont bring that up. im not new to painkillers, have been taking them within the dosage instructions and trying to not take them on an empty stomach. just need talking down, the anxiety is up tonight and its almost 4am.

I’m posting this in hopes that people who are like me and like to freak out/find themselves overthinking this surgery, have something thorough and detailed as I can make it. It will more than likely be long. Read it if you want or don’t.
• I had 4 impacted wisdom teeth removed due to me constantly getting infections and having major discomfort in my bottom two wisdom teeth.
Day 1: • Surgery was scheduled for 9:00am on Thursday January 18th, I was out of the office and walking into the door at home by 10:06am. I was IV sedated and received stitches.
Day of surgery was weird, it’s my first surgery and was my first time having an IV & being put to sleep. The IV to me personally didn’t hurt and they were able to find a vein quickly. It felt like a baby pinch. They then walked me through the first 4 days of what recovery COULD look like. Then my surgeon came in asked me if I was ready and said let’s do this. I instantly fell asleep, I was so scared that I was going to fight it because I hate not having control of my body but boy was I wrong 😂 it honestly felt like a deep sleep. I then woke up at 9:33AM and the nurses were rushing me out to the car. I could walk but I was extremely loopy. I don’t really remember the car ride home nor getting into the house. When I got home I instantly took my pain meds, put ice around my face with my ice head wrap and went straight to sleep. My husband had to keep waking me up because I kept falling asleep with the gauze in my mouth. Soon enough I stopped bleeding and was able to take the gauze out to keep sleeping. I was prescribed Ibuprofen & Tylenol with codeine. I didnt take the Tylenol when I got home only the ibuprofen and that was a HUGE mistake. I could feel pain instantly when my anesthesia wore off. My instructions weren’t clear on how to take my medications. I thought I was supposed to alternate and not take them BOTH every 6 hours. So the first night was painful but not crazy 5/10. Ice definitely helped a ton and I was fortunate enough to have my husband going back and forth to the freezer.
Day 2:
Honestly, I slept on and off the whole day. I tried to eat but it my throat hurt so bad and pudding was too difficult so I only drank protein drinks and water at this point, icing my face and sleeping. I still wasn’t taking the Tylenol so my pain was pretty gnarly. I was more sore on day 2, my throat hurt SO bad and my jaw was stiff. Pain 7/10.
Day 3:
I was sleeping on and off all day again. Still in a good amount of pain but less than day 2. I attempted to eat something more solid this day which was mashed potatoes and it was SO HARD. 😩 but I ate a good amount and added some cheese to get those extra calories. I started to develop a smell and was terrified of dry socket because my spouse has had dry socket and I know the smell 🥹 I contacted my dentist because of the smell and crazy pain. I still was only taking the ibuprofen. Pain 6/10.
Day 4:
Same as the day before. Nothing changed. I think I ate mashed potatoes here BUT added gravy and it made it easier to eat.
Day 5:
I felt somewhat “normal” this day. My dentist called me to come in because of the smell and I was thankful because I was annoyed with the smell, it smells like fucking death. 🤮 My pain was better than days 1-3 but not by much. I was still icing because it felt so good and helped tremendously! Went to the dentist, no infection, no dry socket. They said it was my stitches that was causing the smell and said they could remove them but I opted not to because I felt it was too early then the dentist said my pain was due to me not taking the ibuprofen and Tylenol with codeine together 💀 I WAS SO MAD LOL. I went home took the ibuprofen and Tylenol together and I felt like a BRAND NEW PERSON. 😂 I still didn’t eat, I only drank protein drinks/ensures. My jaw was pretty sore on the bottoms but tolerable. Pain was 4/10 at this point. I also started swishing and irrigating with the syringe this day. I was also prescribed the mouthwash which I wasn’t initially.
Day 6 & 7:
These days were pretty similar as day 5. The pain fluctuated. Some hours were more painful than the others. I was icing on and off but not as much as the first few days. I think I attempted to eat noodles on the 6th day but couldn’t so I stuck with applesauce, pudding and some yogurt. I honestly slept SO much on days 1-7. I also dealt with becoming dizzy and running a small fever but I think it’s because I was taking so many pain meds on an empty stomach. My husband made me some fluffy eggs and added some cheese and I swallowed them and felt SO much better. So as hard as it is, it’s important to eat. I started swishing a bit more vigorously these days per my dentist and I was still dealing with the smell in my mouth these two days.
Day 8 & 9:
The pain lessened significantly these days. I didn’t really eat on day 8 tbh. It was exhausting and I was emotional because I couldn’t eat anything “good” I slept quite a bit but when I was awake it was normal just miserable. Day 9 I finally made 3 baked potatoes and ate them normally and I was SO SO HAPPY. 😂😩 This baked potato was the most golden meal ever. The pain died down, only taking meds when it really bothered me. Some stitches fell out but not all. The smell is slight but still there….
Day 10 (yesterday the 27th):
My other back molars were sore and felt like I was teething/grinding my teeth. It was quite annoying, a bit painful but tolerable. I had to take two rounds of my meds. Still only eating baked potatoes which whatever it’s better than nothing and I’m really enjoying them. 😂 I think the stitches are completely gone on the bottoms and I have open holes but I think the tops still have stitches (I can feel them) the smell has lessened significantly but it’s still there, unfortunately. Still swishing and irrigating.
I’m a smoker and I drink soda. I’m REALLY craving both of those but I’m scared of dry socket 😂 Who knows, maybe this is my way to quit both. It’s been 11 days since I’ve smoked and thankfully no crazy withdrawals 🫶🏼
All in all, I was extremely terrified of this surgery let alone getting teeth taken out. I have good teeth and have never had a cavity so the thought of teeth being ripped out, scared the shit out of me. I’m thankful I did this and that it’s over with and I know in the long run it’ll be worth it. The pain felt like somebody gave me a dead arm but in my mouth (I included this because before my surgery I was looking for somebody to compare the pain to something and nobody ever did) My biggest regret was not pushing myself to eat more and not taking my medicine properly. Not eating really took a toll on my energy and I slept way more than I felt was normal. Today is day 11 and there’s still some pain there but it’s more annoying than it is painful. I’m returning back to work this week and just going to continue to heal. If you have any questions let know. I tried to be as detailed as I could. It’s not perfect but I hope this helps someone!

Hey all! I thought I'd share my MA experience with you as I found them pretty helpful in the lead up to mine. So I was around 7 weeks pregnant.
I took the first pill on the evening of 19/01. That was that really. Nothing happened.
Evening of 20/01 rolls round, I took one codeine tablet because I get anxious about being in pain and then 15 minutes later I inserted the four tablets vaginally as I was feeling nauseous anyway due to the pregnancy. An hour in and nothing is happening, which is weird because I was definitely expecting to be feeling something. I had a pee about 30 minutes before I was due to take the last 2 misos and noticed a bit of blood when I wiped.
After I took the last 2 pills orally and the bleeding really started, but I've had no pain to speak of. Some mild cramping that id expect from a period but I just topped up with ibroprofen and it went away. Went back to the toilet before I went up to bed and felt a clot pass, I didn't look at it so I don't know what it looked like. I went to bed at about 1am and managed to sleep til 7 (toddler woke up) and I had bled through the maternity pad AND the adult nappy I had put on. So there is a lot of blood.
Bleeding seems to have slowed now (21/01) but I expect it to come and go. No other clots have been passed, so not sure if I've passed the pregnancy or not but I will take the provided pregnancy test in 3 weeks as instructed.
Not all MAs are trumatic, stay strong ladies ❤️

I had top surgery with Dr Philip Rubin just over a week ago (via NHS route) and just wanted to put some information out there about the process and share some results as I know I struggled to find all the information I wanted prior to surgery in relation to him. My results are on a different post here - Results post
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If anyone has any questions about Dr Rubin/Nuffield Newcastle I'm more than happy to answer via comments or through DMs.
A point to note was that I went through this whole process identifying as non-binary, when I first went to the appointments for Gender Dysphoria, I was terrified that this was instantly going to set me back as I had heard horror stories (back then, it’s not the same now) about certain places only accepting people transitioning FTM. I needn’t have worried as the services were all very supportive and understanding of non-binary users.
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Gender Dysphoria Referral and Wait Times:
March 2017 - Referral to the Gender Dysphoria service sent out by my GP.
May 2019 - First appointment with the Northern Region Gender Dysphoria Service (NRGDS).
October (early) 2022 - Second appointment with the NRGDS.
October (late) 2022 – Call to choose surgeon.
July (early) 2023 – Surgeon’s secretary confirmed referral being processed.
July (late) 2023 – In person consultation with Dr Rubin.
November (late) – “Round robin” e-mail received for last minute appointment date, which would be granted on a first come first serve basis.
December (mid) 2023 – Surgery Date.
Consultation and Surgery Options:
I had my consultation scheduled for 4.20pm on the 18th of July 2023 at the Nuffield Hospital in Newcastle. Unfortunately, Dr Rubin was running behind and so I did not get seen until about 5.30pm. The consultation lasted about an hour and at no point did I feel like he was rushing me through considering he had been delayed in seeing me. He allowed my wife to come in as well, which was great for me as there was so much information given that there was no way I was able to remember everything on my own.
If you have read any other pieces on Dr Rubin, you’ll be aware that it’s reported he has very “particular” mannerisms. You won’t be in there having a bit of friendly banter with him. He paints a detailed picture of what to expect and is very thorough in what he tells you.
We started by going through some details of what I wanted from the surgery, some people want to retain nipple sensation, some want the flattest results, some want a certain scar position etc. So, he will talk you through the types of surgery available. He also took me behind a curtain (with a nurse present) to evaluate my chest size, skin elasticity, nipple size and such.
Once he had all this information, he discussed what would be feasible based on my wants and what was physically possible. I had hoped to be able to get Peri-Areolar as I had quite a small chest (A/B cup). However, he told me my skin was not suitable for that if I wanted flat results. I was also informed that the Peri-Areolar technique sometimes resulted in revisions being required due to left over breast tissue around the pedicle/stalk of the nipple.
So, we settled on Double Incision (DI) with Free Nipple Graft, even though I went in with one idea of what I wanted I kept an open mind as I knew I needed to trust his expert opinion, so if he was more certain of the DI technique getting me the results I wanted, I wasn’t going to argue with that. He proceeded to show me some images of results from people with a similar build to me. Before I left, he also asked me to put some weight on. Although I was within the “Healthy” BMI range it was towards the lower end, and he said that it would be beneficial to have some more fat on my chest. Apparently, a small layer of fat would help reduce the odds of hyperpigmentation on my skin from when he was cauterizing during surgery. For reference when I went to see him, I was 49kg at 5’4”, BMI of 18.5.
Day of Surgery:
I’ll go through this in as much detail as possible because I was mostly scared of the unknown going into mine. I like to prepare for everything and know where I need to be at what time etc.
I was scheduled to be at the hospital for 7.15am on the day of surgery. When I arrived, I was asked to take a seat in the front reception area until a nurse came to collect me. I was allowed to have my wife with me (visiting hours are 11am until 8pm so I was concerned I would be on my own!). We were taken to my room where I was shown around and given a robe, paper knickers and compressions socks to get changed into. I was also asked to provide a urine sample. Thankfully I was able to do this, I had to fast from 2.30am and no liquids from 6am. It would have been helpful to know before hand as I thought my bladder was likely empty by this point! As an FYI in case it is triggering for anyone they will discuss potential pregnancy as part of the urine sample results.
Another nurse came in and took my blood pressure and heart rate. Went through some basic health questions, again prewarning if it is triggering, they will discuss periods/menstrual cycle. They then took my urine sample away for testing. I’d like to say right now the nurse I had was AMAZING! She was so friendly and created a great atmosphere that helped keep me calm.
It was all a bit of a whirlwind of seeing various members of staff from that point. I had a caterer come in and ask what I would like for tea in the evening and the following morning for breakfast. The options are quite comprehensive and include some vegan options, so you won’t be going hungry.
I was told my surgery was scheduled for 8.30am, I saw Dr Rubin again and he had me sign some paperwork before going through the surgery again. He then had me go to the bathroom with him where he sat on the toilet and asked me to stand in front of him topless so that he could draw on me. He was silent through most of this and used a tape measure whilst noting figures down on me alongside various lines. Once he was done, he asked if I would stand up so that he could take some photos at different angles. He also asked if I would consent to my photos being used for various purposes. You do not have to agree to any of the photo usage, but I ticked all the boxes as I found it helpful seeing results during my consultation and wanted to provide what I could for others.
Once Dr Rubin was done, I saw the Anaesthetist who basically asked more health-related questions. I mentioned I got nauseous easily so could I have something provided to reduce sickness to which he said that would be fine.I was left alone for a little while with my wife, really not long at all. Then the nurse came in and said it was time to go to theatre, I donned my dressing gown and slippers at this point. My wife was allowed to walk with me from my room the doors and told she could either wait in the room or come back later when they expected me out of surgery. She was told it would be about 1pm if all went well.
I entered the room that had some nurses and the anaesthetist. I handed over my dressing gown and slippers to the first nurse and then lay down on a bed. They loosened my robe so that my top half could be accessed easily. The anaesthetist then proceeded to place a band on my arm and tap the top of my hand whilst I flexed my fingers to determine which vein to insert the canula into. Once that was inserted, I was talking to them a little bit, I do not even recall being asked to countdown, I just remember waking up in the recovery waiting area. I was VERY nervous about the general anaesthetic, so I suspect they just started putting me to sleep without alerting me to the fact, which in all honesty I think I preferred.
When I woke up, I was very groggy. I could see it was 12.45 on the clock on the wall. But I kept going in and out of it a bit. They offered me some water once I was awake. As mentioned, I was worried about being nauseous (I get travel sick so knew it was going to be a difficult part for me). I threw up a couple of times, but nurses were on hand to place a tray underneath me. They gave me some more anti-sickness medication, though I can’t remember how this was administered (probably the canula).
It took about 20 – 30 minutes for me to come round enough for them to take me back up to my room. I was wheeled up and had my wife waiting for me in the room already. They were not far off when they suggested 1pm for being finished up.
After that I was checked on every hour by nurses. These checks were for blood pressure, temperature, heart rate and the volume of liquid in my drains. I didn’t feel too bad pain wise for the first few hours. I managed some food and water during this time, was allowed to stand up and go to the toilet and get changed into my own underwear and pyjamas but had to keep the compression socks on. I would highly recommend an oversized thin cotton button up shirt as manoeuvring with the drains and soreness was tricky.
As the pain medication and anaesthetic wore off, I was struck with a bad bout of nausea around 6pm (5 hours after coming round from surgery). I was not actually sick, but I felt horrific. They gave me a small amount of anti-sickness medication via a tablet but said I was maxed out on the stuff so would have to ride it out from there. The did keep checking on my and brought a fan into the room. Luckily, the nausea subsided enough for me to act human again within a couple of hours. Though I didn’t eat or drink much until around 2am after that.My wife was allowed to stay a little bit past 8pm but then had to go home.
I saw many more nurses throughout the night, do not expect to get a good stint of sleep as you will be checked on every couple of hours! I would suggest a long phone charging cable so you can easily access your phone for entertainment, also the hospital room had a TV with freeview channels and free wifi which certainly helped during the broken sleep.
In the morning I saw a nurse who informed me Dr Rubin should be discharging me when he gets a chance to see me, though they were insistent that he often ran late, and it could be 5/6pm before he got a chance to see me. I was also seen by the catering team again who took my lunch order on the basis they expected I would be in for the day (again lots of fab options including vegan, they also offer an option for your visitor to pay extra fee order from their options and to eat with you during meal times that fall within their visiting hours).
At some point in the morning, I was seen by a physiotherapist from the hospital who showed me some exercises to perform. I’m not entirely sure that Dr Rubin would agree with one of them as it is to try push yourself to get your arms above your head. I suppose if you were not bothered by the way your scars look you may do that as soon as possible, but I will not be. I’m intending on keeping my elbows below shoulder level for at least four weeks to avoid widening the scars.
At about 9.30am I was very lucky and got to see Dr Rubin. He explained that he changed his technique mid surgery as he was able to save my nipple stalks (pedicle) and so I believe he did a combination of buttonhole and double incision so that I would not require nipple grafts. As a note he had told me during my pre-op assessment that I had “male nipples” so the size and shape of them were already perfect for a masculine chest. He continued to tell me the surgery went well and that it was better than expected due to a few things. One of which was that he had commented on me having flared ribs, but when he completed the surgery stated that the sternum area was not as concave as he thought it would end up being.
He continued to talk me through the recovery process, various instructions on caring for scars and what I could/could not do over the coming weeks. Once he was finished, he checked the drains and said they were fine to come out.
Once he left, I messaged my wife who was allowed to come over to help get me ready for leaving. The nurses again were really good and were fine with her being around before visiting hours.
The drains were “devacced” and I had to wait an additional half an hour before they could be taken out. I only drained a total of about 30ml on the right and 50ml on the left. So not much at all. When it was time for the drains to come out, I had two nurses in attendance. They cut the stitches holding the drain on one side before instructing me to take a deep breath. On the exhale they pulled the tube out. They then repeat3ed the process on the other side. I know some people have said it can be painful, but in all honesty it just felt strange. I’ll mention also I at no point took any additional painkillers after surgery. I felt uncomfortable but never in “pain” enough to feel like I needed medicating.
Once the drains were out, they left for a little while before coming back to remove the canula, give me medication to take home (paracetamol, codeine & a laxative), a spare binder, spare compression socks for home and provided instructions on post-op care. During this discussion the caterer came in with my lunch, so I was allowed to finish that off before heading home. The final thing they did was get a doctor to provide me with a sick note for work. I was given four weeks on the note, but if you feel better before then you do not have to take the full four weeks.
Post Surgical Recovery:
I’ve put together some of the things I have done since surgery to make things as comfortable as possible for myself and some of the things I was advised to do in case anyone wants to purchase items or prepare themselves ahead of time.
· For the journey home from hospital my wife placed a small cushion on my chest so that the seatbelt could sit on this rather than touching my chest directly. A week and a half later I am still using this for any car journeys.
· At home I have an orthopaedic wedge pillow that can be adjusted to different angles. I use it in bed to keep me elevated while I sleep. This is far more comfortable for me than stacking pillows as it is quite solid and provides plenty of back support.
· Neck pillow is a must I found. I spent one night in the hospital without it and had a bad cricked neck for a few days after because of it. But with the neck pillow I have not had any recurrence of that.
· Oversized soft fabric button up shirts. I cannot emphasise enough how much easier it is to go about my day with a button up shirt. I can put a t-shirt on by myself, but it is a nightmare, and I can feel things pulling when I do this. So, I try to avoid it as much as possible this early on.
· Straws for drinks. Something very simple but easily forgotten.
· Slip on shoes were helpful the first few days.
· I take creatine monohydrate daily before and after surgery. There are plenty of studies out there that indicate it could be beneficial for reducing muscle atrophy during periods of limb immobilisation.
· I did a lot of chest exercises with a PT prior to surgery, but also focused on working my body in a way that allowed me to do things without the use of my arms. So core work was essential and has helped me no end during recovery especially moving from lying to standing positions without using my arms.

I tied my hair up in a ponytail. It was likely going to be a slow shift, no one really shows up for breakfast except for a few old folks. I locked my car and stepped out onto the snow. Freshly fallen from last night, the parking lot was almost a perfect sparklingly white sheet. But two pairs of footprints had left scattered indents.
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There was something strange about them. I stared as I walked past and then it hit me. The footprints just ended, no tire marks or anything else. *Teenagers?* I wondered. *Walking forwards and then backwards in their own footprints?* One of them must have had the same shoes as me...
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“Julia!” A man’s voice called out.
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I turned, looking around for the speaker. I spotted him to my left, walking quickly towards me. I gripped my keys between my fingers. It was broad daylight, but you could never be too careful.
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I waited as the man bounded up to me. Maybe it was a trick of the morning sun, but the oval above his head shone strangely. Most numbers were translucent with slight glow to their fog-like texture. But this man’s shone like a florescent light.
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“Sorry, but do I know you?” I asked, tightening my grip.
​
“Not me, a friend of mine,” he said excitedly, his breath coming out in puffs. “Ben! Ben Anderson.”
​
I hesitated. I didn’t know anyone by that name.
​
“I think you’ve mistaken me for someone else,” I said, offering a polite smile. “I have to go to work now…”
​
“Right, of course you don’t remember,” the man rambled, “Just give me a sec, this thing is a bit finicky.”
​
The man patted the side of his head and the oval above his head flickered like a neon sign before changing to a four.
​
“The cold always messes this thing up,” he said cheerfully. He reached a hand towards my head. “Just stay still for a moment.”
​
“What are you doing? Who are you?” I asked, dodging his hand.
​
“Me?” The man smiled, “I’m Alex March. And I’m restoring your memories.”
​
Julia pulled away and it felt like the world dropped out from beneath me. Suddenly, I was me again, looking through my own eyes and thinking my own thoughts, none of which were particularly helpful at the moment.
​
“What the hell was that…” I asked, heaving. “I’ve never experienced anything like that, even when searching through memories as an officer. I’ve watched memories, felt them, but never *became* them.”
​
“Sorry,” Julia said, backing away slightly, “It’s because I’m...I’m like an empath, only instead of feeling the emotions of others, I force my own on them. That’s why people end up wanting to help me, why they end up caring about me.”
​
Julie’s expression looked guilty and she curled into herself as she explained. A lot of things suddenly made sense. Her overbearing heartbeat whenever we shifted, how quickly I had come to take her mission as my own and...
​
“It was never by choice or by circumstance…” I said quietly. “Not mine anyway…”
​
“I…” Julia closed her mouth and looked at the floor. “...I didn’t know I was doing it. Not until Alex fixed my memories.”
​
“He’s pretty good at that,” I remarked.
​
“I’ve had practice,” Alex winked. “And on that note, let’s get you cleaned up. All this serious talk is even more depressing when you look like this.”
​
I was suddenly even more aware of my current soggy state of being.
​
“The bathroom’s down the hall,” Alex said, helping me to my feet, “You’re going to need some help.”
​
“I really hope this place belongs to one of you,” I said, wrapping the towel around me like a shawl.
​
“It’s yours, actually,” Alex said cheerfully, as we hobbled down the hallway together.
​
“Um, thanks?” I said, “Gee, you shouldn’t have.”
​
“Yeah, happy birthday,” Alex laughed. “I meant it’s your apartment from when you were living in Zero with fake memories. I haven’t been paying your rent by the way and the landlord is kicking us out in a week.”
​
“Oh...home, sweet home,” I said weakly as I gingerly peeled off my shirt and tossed it into a corner.
​
“...That’s nasty,” Alex said, staring at my stomach.
​
“I don’t suppose that microchip I gave you has a healing code?” I said, mostly joking but with just a twinge of hope.
​
“Unfortunately, no,” Alex said, “But I do have a sewing kit.”
​
“I’m going to need more painkillers, all of them actually,” I said quickly. “Please tell me you have codeine.”
​
Around an hour later, I walked back into the living room feeling like a different man - a freshly-clothed man, high on acetaminophen, ibuprofen and a handful of weed gummies Alex had found in my nightstand. Julia sat on the barstool at the kitchen island.
​
“You come here often?” I asked with what I hoped was a charming smile. I couldn’t exactly feel my face to be able to tell.
​
Julia spun around and cracked a wry smile. “Only on the weekend.”
​
“I see you guys have done a little redecorating,” I said, looking around. It was undoubtedly my apartment with my cheap futon, Ikea furniture and dying (okay, deceased) potted plants.
​
However, my computer setup had a significant upgrade and parts of various gadgets were scattered around. I wandered over and picked up what looked like a motherboard off the desk.
​
“So since when were you a tech genius?” I asked, turning to Alex.
​
“Since you pushed me here with a microchip that was basically a cheat code in real life,” Alex answered. He tapped the side of his head and then turned to display the electrode stuck behind his ear. A wire went down into his shirt. Turning back around, he lifted his shirt to show me a shoddy mess of wires and a control panel duct-taped to his chest.
​
“Go on, admire my genius,” He said proudly. Julia rolled her eyes behind him, but there was a hint of a smile at the edges of her mouth.
​
“I gave you an overpowered, highly advanced, god-level microchip that could contain the secrets of the universe and you used it to become DIY Ironman?!” I said, my jaw dropping.
​
“You didn’t exactly give me an instruction manual!” Alex exclaimed, “And did I mention I saved your life???”
​
“Alex,” I said, placing my hand on his shoulder, “You. Are. The. Man.”
​
“THANK YOU,” Alex said, grinning broadly.
​
“Seriously, both of you…” I said, looking at them both. “Thanks for saving me.”
​
“It was the least I could do,” Julia said with a wry smile, “For getting you involved in the first place.”
​
“So what now?” Alex asked, “Do we live our lives in hiding as three felonious Musketeers? Start a rebellion? Take over Zero as the ultimate overlords?”
​
“Or do we go and rip your sister’s heart out of that bitch’s cold metal chest?” I said, turning to Julia.
​
“Are you insane? We just managed to get you out of there and you want to go back!” Julia said, her voice rising with anger and disbelief. “After everything I just showed you, after everything we just went through…the first thing out of your stupid mouth is to suggest we waltz back in there…”
​
“I’m not saying we go right away and certainly not without some kind of plan,” I replied quickly. “But think about it…Can you really sit back and let them get away with it all?”
​
“You are determined to die, aren’t you?” Julia said, shaking her head.
​
“I heard Rachel,” I said quietly, “When Miralle Lang nearly killed me I heard Rachel’s voice in my head. She’s somewhere…maybe not on any of the frequencies we know of, but she’s out there. And she saved my life.”
​
Julia fell silent. I met her eyes as she stared at me, desperation in their pools and I knew she was searching the depths of my gaze for truth.
​
“What did she say?” Julia asked.
​
“She told me Miralle wanted to push me into Aevum so she could use me,” I answered, “And that she wants me because I did something different, just like the others who became Fours. She also said that the Praesidium wants to control all frequencies.”
​
“You mean I was working for a dictator all this time???” Alex said, his jaw dropping.
​
“Mirelle will never let either of us go,” I said gently, “We should at least prepare for the inevitable.”
​
“As the least wanted man in this team up, I have to say Ben’s got a point,” Alex said, raising his hand. “That Robobitch is going to hunt you down through time and space. And Ben’s old apartment isn’t exactly ‘top secret’.”
​
“Goddamit guys,” Julia said with a sigh, “I can’t believe I’m stuck with you stupid stubborn idiots…”
​
“Does that mean you agree with me?” I asked, lighting up hopefully.
​
“For the record, I don’t agree,” Julia replied, reaching into her pocket. A familiar looking scrunchie appeared in her hand and she pulled her long hair back into a tight ponytail. “But I can tell when I’m outnumbered.”
​
“I’ll take that as a *yes*!” I said, pumping my fist in the air, “Now let’s get started!”
​
I started pacing the length of the apartment, thinking aloud. “On their side, they have the ability to alter memories, change someone’s number, and time travel,” I said, listing them off on my fingers. “But we also have abilities on our side.”
​
I pointed at Julia. “You have your empath powers and can half-shift alone,” I turned to Alex next, “You can fix memories and time travel and whatever else that chip does!”
​
“Is this supposed to be some kind of motivational speech?” Alex remarked. “Or a really bad impression of Oprah?”
​
“And I can shift alone and…” I paused, struggling to describe my own ability, “...mix and match frequencies!”
​
“Can you even shift in that state?” Alex asked, “I mean, I didn’t want to be the first one to bring it up, but man…your number is really fucked.”
​
“...by ‘fucked’, how bad do you-”
​
“I mean absolutely *fucked*,” Alex said, cutting me off, “It looks like it’s glitching out, like a bunch of numbers are jumbled together.”
​
“...We will cross that bridge when we get there!” I declared, “Moving on!”
​
I grabbed a notebook and a pen from my desk. I set it down on the island countertop and sat down. “The best way to catch someone off guard is to make them think everything is going according to their plan.”
​
“Oh no, he’s gone mad scientist on us,” Alex said.
​
“How long has it been since you’ve been back in Zero?” I asked Julia, ignoring Alex.
​
“Alex found me right after I had been sent back,” Julia answered, “Rescuing you probably took a day in linear time.”
​
“You guys pulled off my rescue in a day? Daaaaamn...” I stared at them in awe.
​
“Not exactly,” Alex laughed, “Yeah it took a day of linear time, but for us it was probably closer to about a week. This was actually attempt number six. I kept looping back every time we failed.”
​
“Well, I’m glad you didn’t quit,” I said cheerfully.
​
“If the past is anything to go by, the next target should be assigned to Julia’s case pretty soon,” Alex said thoughtfully. “Going by our experience, that means the next officer will likely come to Zero in two weeks after they’ve reviewed her file and made preparations.”
​
“We wait for them to make contact,” I said, jotting notes down. “Julia works her emotional manipulation and wins them to our side!”
​
“Wow, I do not like that description of my abilities,” Julia said dryly.
​
“Sorry..” I crossed out *emotional manipulation*, and replaced it with “...Julia *persuades\* them to our side.”
​
“Speaking of, did you ever have a plan when convincing people to bring you to the Third?” Alex asked Julia.
​
“It’s all a bit of a blur…” Julia said slowly. “When you restored my memories…it was a lot all at once…more than I expected”
​
“How many more?” I asked.
​
Julia hesitated. “It’s just…I think I’ve lived this past year at least a dozen different times.”
​
“...But there were only four hearts,” I said, my own heart sinking as I realized what that meant.
​
“...Yeah,” Julia said, looking away. “Only four people ever made it that far.”
​
“Out of how many?” Alex asked.
​
“Hundreds."

This subreddit has been a great source of information for me prior to my PRK surgery and now during my recovery. Here below is how it is going for me. Feel free to skip to Day 1 Post Op if you are just interested in the recovery log and not the surgery procedure itself.
My eyes qualified for both LASIK and PRK and I ultimately chose to proceed with PRK because I wanted to avoid some of LASIK's (very rare) potential complications and because I did not want the corneal flap created during LASIK.
Eye Prescription:
Left, -3.50 sphere, -0.25 CYL, 175 AS
Right -4.25 sphere, -0.25 CYL, 175 AS
Day 1
My experience on the day of the painless surgery has been very similar to everyone else's.
An hour before the surgery, I underwent a few eye tests to ensure that the topography-guided excimer laser machine had all the required and up-to-date information. I was subsequently given protective covers for my shoes and hair, a Xanax to calm my (yet to appear) nerves, and a few numbing and anti-inflammatory eye drops.
20-30 min later or so, I was guided to the operation room and I was asked to lay down on my back on the operation bed. There were 3 people in the room: the ophthalmologist/eye surgeon and two nursing assistants. More numbing eye drops were applied. A face cover with a hole in it so that one eye could peak through it was then stuck onto my face, and self adhesive tapes and a little wire clip were placed around my eye to keep my eyelid open. That wire clip was the most uncomfortable element of the surgery for me as I could somewhat feel the clamp against the extremities of my eyes.The surgeon used a small well to administer a few drops of alcohol solution onto the cornea to dissolve the epithelial layer and a small scrubber to remove the excess fluid from my eye. I then had to fix into the green laser for 10-12 seconds. More eye liquid was poured into my eye, the bandage contact lens was put in place and ta-da, the first eye was done in 5 min or so. Afterwards, the surgeon proceeded to operate the other eye.
In total, I must have stayed in the operating room for 10-15 min max. It was completely painless, not scary but a bit weird since you are awake and conscious of what is being done to your eyes. Straight after the surgery, I could see very clearly. The ophthalmologist checked that my eyes were all good, gave me a codeine tablet, cool tinted eye goggles, instructions for the next few days and weeks and I was in the clear to be driven home.
Day 1 Post Op
The pain started kicking in ~2 hours after the surgery, once the anesthetic effects had dissipated. The pain was not excruciating but it was still very bad to the point where I could hardly focused on anything else. It was not continuous though. It felt like a great number of micro sticks were poked into my eyeball at the same time. The burning sensation would occur for 5-20 seconds at a time with a few seconds/minutes break in between.
My eyes were watering constantly, and my nose was running in consequence. I couldn't keep my eyes open because of the pain and because of the light sensitivity. I slouched on the couch for a bit, had an early dinner, took two tablets of codeine and tried to go to sleep. Throughout the first ~20 hours, the stinging feeling moved from the periphery of the cornea to its center before fading away.
Day 2The night was restless as I kept on getting woken up by the micro-sticks army's repeated assaults despite the painkillers I took. In the morning, it took me a few minutes to open my eyes because of all the tears and eye gunk that formed throughout the night. The pain slowly subsided and I almost stopped feeling any pain by noon. I was very tired because of the lack of good sleep and my eyes, somewhat a bit more blurry than the day before, were still very light sensitive so I dozed/slept throughout most of the day.
Day 3-4
No pain but my vision became very blurry and my eyes a little bit dryer. My eyelids became quite swollen to the point where it was uncomfortable to keep my puffy eyes open for a very long time. I could not focus on any screens (or anything really) so just kept them shut and listened to podcasts throughout most of the day. By the end of day 4, my eyelids were no longer swollen, my vision slowly started improving (60-70% sharpness) and I could use my phone again without much discomfort by maximizing the screen text size.
Day 5
My vision improved significantly, especially my left eye (80% sharpness). My right (60% sharpness) was a bit behind but it was still good enough to do most activities. I watched a film on TV for the very first time the evening and I could just about read the subtitles thanks to the dominant eye.
Day 6-7
I could see with both eyes on the morning of day 6! The right eye (80% sharpness) was still lagging a bit behind but it was closer to my left eye (90% sharpness). Bandage contacts were removed. My eyes became a bit dryer and my vision worsened in the evening, back to day 5 level. In the subsequent days, my eyes have become less dry and my vision has improved a little bit but still was not as sharp as on the morning of day 6 (left eye: ~85% and right eye: ~70%). I can use screens (phone, TV, laptop) somewhat comfortably again but my eyes do tend to get tired faster. My left eye is better for far vision and my right eye is better for near vision. I would need to squint and focus to discern text on screen if I were to only use my left eye.That's it for now, I'll update the post as time progresses! Feel free to ask if you have any questions.
Week 2 (Edit #1)
My vision has improved only ever so slightly from 2 days after removing the bandage contacts to the end of week 2. The improvement has been less noticeable than during the first recovery week and my vision can fluctuate depending on how tired my eyes are on the day and time of day. My eye drops regime changed from initially supplementing my hydrating eye drops with anti-bacterial ones to anti-inflammatory ones (dexamethasone) now instead of the anti-bacterial ones.
I would say my left eye's vision is very closed to what it used to be like with contact lenses or glasses on but it still has some softness for distant subjects (95% sharpness). My left eye near vision has fixed itself around day 10 and I can read screens/books without any problem now.My right eye has improved a little bit as well but it is still considerably lagging behind my left eye. My right eye's far vision is probably close to 80% in terms of sharpness but its near vision is a little bit worse, especially when I'm tired.
In terms of secondary effects, my eyes are a bit dry at the end of the day but not as much as when I was wearing contacts. I do put hydrating drops about 5x a day which help. My eyes are not as light sensitive anymore, except when it is particularly bright against a darker background, so it is more noticeable at night. I do have small halos and starbursts at night as well but nothing too disturbing.
Week 2 - 1 Month (Edit #2)
My vision remained pretty unchanged during week 2 to week 4. It may have improved ever so slightly over the course of these two weeks but it was not that noticeable then. As much as I was already somewhat satisfied with my vision at this point and as much as I was aware that PRK recovery takes time, there was always this glimpse of hope that I'd recover faster than most people, which did not turn out to be the case. I just had to be a little bit more patient for my right eye to catch up on my left eye. Patience!
At the one month mark, I had a check up with my ophthalmologist. He told me that both eyes were no longer short-sighted but that my right eye still had some residual astigmatism. With both eyes open, I scored approx. 9.5 out of 10 with my left eye doing most of the work as the dominant one. I was told I could stop the anti-inflammatory drops and just carry on with the hydrating ones for another two months.
2 Months (Edit #3)
It seems like my left eye is crystal sharp and can see 10/10. My right eye is still lagging behind a little bit with astigmatism which somewhat gives me double vision in that eye when it is tired. I would say it is close to 9/10 in terms of sharpness. It has been improving slowly day by day and if I frown, it pretty much sees 10/10 as well.
3 Months (Edit #4)
I got 10/10 for both eyes at the ophthalmologist and he told me that my eyes have recovered as planned. I can see crystal clear and I am very happy with the final result. I can’t remember precisely when I had this « I can see perfectly » moment but I think it was sometime just after the 2 months mark that I stopped testing my eyes with near or far objects/writings because I didn’t feel anything was off with my vision anymore. I'd say that the residual astigmatism in my right eye resolved itself shortly after the 2 months mark or at least that's when I stopped noticing any difference between my left and my right eye. I don't have dry eyes or any noticeable secondary effects.
That will probably going to be my last update unless something new develops in the future. Best of luck to everyone who's going through the procedure!