Okay, now that this is all typed out, I realised this sounds really, really silly. But I don't know what to do, and I've already put some time into writing this, so I might as well post it, and maybe get some much needed insight.
TL;DR: My fiancee's friend is hitting on me, my fiancee doesn't seem to mind and even seems to encourage her behaviour, and I can't make sense of what the hell is happening.
Now this is a story where nothing happens, except a very strong gut feeling that something is out of the ordinary. First things first, I'm not in the US, so I don't want legal advice, because it probably doesn't apply in my country (unless you're brazilian...). Anyway, I (M26) have been engaged to my fiancee, Lara (F29) for about three years, but she's in my life for almost ten years, and we've been dating on and off since 2018. This will be relevant in a while.
Our relationship is great in every sense since the beginning. We're what most would call a "bland" couple, so we mostly don't fight and agree in pretty much everything: life goals, career, bedroom, living standards, work-life balance, you name it. And one thing we always agreed on was that we were monogamous. I have my personal views about open ralationships, that are very strong. Lara's not much, but she agreed that as long as we were a couple, we would be monogamous.
But things started getting a bit weird since this girl, let's call her Amanda, got into her life. So I'm pretty sure Lara met (or reconnected with) Amanda at work, after the Covid restrictions were lifted. And they went into a pretty intimate friendship in a matter of weeks. To the point of spending a lot of time messaging or facetiming each other, going together on girl nights. I found it rather strange at first, because it's so out of character for my fiancee, normally very private and even a little shy, to go from "I just met this person at work" to "she's my best friend".
Well, I confronted her about it, not because I'm jealous or anything, but because it was weird coming from her. She told me that Amanda was, in fact, an old friend of hers from school, and that they used to spend a lot of time together but lost contact, and now are reconnecting. Okay, this explanation went good with me, and I stopped thinking about it, and would not have thought of the matter anymore if it weren't for what happened afterwards.
You see, Amanda is very, VERY flirty towards me. She always strikes up conversation with me, compliments me a lot, makes sexual jokes/innuendo directed at me, and it happens even in front of my fiancee. Honestly, I can't say I'm used to being flirted with, but I know the difference between when someone is being nice and when someone is actually hitting on me. But I let it rest for a while, it might be just how Amanda is. But then something weird happened back in January (not getting into detail, but Amanda crossed some of my boundaries), and I felt the need to confront Lara. I talked to her in a very serious manner, about what I thought Amanda was doing, and asked Lara if she had ever noticed something as well, and if it bothered her. Lara all but laughed at me, told me not to stress over it, and to "go with the flow". She even gave a little wink when she told me that.
From that day onwards, I didn't speak to Lara about the subject anymore, but I kind of noticed that Amanda's flirting started to get more straightforward. She even asked me out (although in a very subtle fashion) once, while Lara was on a work trip. I obviously refused, told her I loved Lara and we were monogamous and stuff, and she shrugged it off. But what is keeping me awake at night is something that happened just yesterday.
As you might know already, the southmost state of my country (Rio Grande do Sul) is going through a very dire situation right now, with terrible floods. I happened to be there traveling for work when the floods hit. I won't get much into the details, but I was scheduled to be there for a week to attend some training sessions and workshops, and I ended up having to stay for a few days more, since all flights were cancelled. I decided to come back via bus, out of my own pocket. It was a very demanding trip, a day and a half in total just to get to [State Capital]. From there, I would have to wait about ten hours for the next bus to [My Town], which would be another three hours.
So I arranged with Lara to make the trip to [State Capital], pick me up at the bus station, and get a hotel room for us to spend the night, so I could get some rest, and we would come back to [My Town] in the morning. She loved the idea, and told me not to worry, that she would get a hotel, and yadda yadda. Well, when she sent me the address, I looked it up and realized it was in fact a love hotel. And a fancy one, by the way. Well, I loved the idea, first because she was paying for it (haha), and second, because we had spent the past two weeks without any intimacy. I reckon she wanted to catch up in more than one sense... But I digress.
Okay, so last night I arrive at the bus station, she gives me the instructions to find where she is parked, I go there, see our car, and as I approach it, almost instantly the door opens... and Amanda comes out. What the heck! She had her hair and makeup done, and I mildly panicked: why was she there? Did something happen to Lara? She was all giggly, too, told me nothing was wrong, but that Lara asked her to come and get me to [Love Hotel]. I stand there, flabbergasted, and she grabs my arm and tries to coax me into the car. Now, I'm a quick thinker of sorts, especially when my gut feelings kick in, so I tapped my pockets, pretended to be anxious (it wasn't very hard, and not much of pretending - I was VERY anxious) and told her that I had forgotten my phone on the bus, so I had an excuse to dart back into the station.
From there, I immediately texted Lara, who laughed at me. I understood at that moment that she was behind it, so I told her I was not going to spend the night with her friend at [Love Hotel], and she just kept laughing and told me it was fine, but that I was "stupid and oblivious" to "miss that opportunity", and that we would talk when I got home. I was very confused by this altercation, and being already tired from the trip, I took a cab, asked him to drive me to the nearest hotel, and booked a room for the night. I spent the night awake, overthinking, and irrationally afraid that Amanda would find me somehow.
I called Lara this morning. we had a quick chat, where she told me that Amanda was a bit disappointed at me but not mad (I didn't even ask), and that I could come back by bus, but she refused to engage in any conversation about the subject. I told her I was feeling confused, in the sense that I really don't understand what's happening, she reassured me everything was fine. I told her that I didn't think so, I was feeling very weird, and she once again told me she wants to talk to me only in person. So what the heck is happening? I booked one more night, so I won't be coming home today. But has anyone here gone through anything similar to this? Why did Amanda "catfish" me? And with Lara's avail, after all? The things that are going to my head is that either Lara wants to "test" me of sorts, or that she is seeing someone else and wants me to "reciprocate". I can't see any other possibility, and honestly, I feel like I don't know my own fiancee anymore. Am I overreacting?

I (28F) am getting married next year. In my country, the principal sponsors are the GodmotheGodfather of the couple to be wed. These roles do not have any monetary responsibility, should they decide to gift anything though is highly welcomed.
I already know whom I want to be a part of my entourage, and my Aunt (let's call her Daisy) is one of them, she and my Mom do not have a perfect relationship but she has been a constant presence in my childhood and adulthood. I always consider her a motherly figure and am close to her daughters. Her eldest is my MOH while the younger one is a BM, that's how close we all are.
Sadly, when it was time for me to invite her and tell her that I was hoping she could be a Godmother at my wedding she dismissed me by saying we'll talk about it, now, I was not surprised when she responded that way as before I messaged her, my Mom already told me the same thing. When my engagement was announced, my mom was overjoyed and started asking Aunt Daisy and their 2 other sisters to be Godmothers, the latter immediately said yes and expressed their excitement and even started joking about how they should start getting back to their "body goals" to look even better in their gowns. Aunt Daisy said no, she said she'll be (please take she'll literally) a Candle or any of the secondary sponsors' roles. When I first heard it, I felt off, Isn't it that the Bride gets to decide who's who? But still, I went ahead and asked her, fast forward, she said we'll talk about it.
I did not want to talk about it and decided that I wouldn't bother her anymore, I know everyone has the right to decline, and I respect that. She just really rubbed me the wrong way, she decided what her role would be, and two, she agreed to become a Godmother for my second cousin's wedding. I'm not jealous of that because I know they are close too. I'm just really sad that she thought she could just decide what she wants without even considering that I probably have other people at my wedding too.
I'm firm in my decision but a part of me thinks that I'm just being dramatic; am I?

I’m 18 and I already feel like I’ve wasted my life, I look back on it and realise I’m a joke to people, I’ve completely fucked my a levels and have no aspirations or goals im going to end up stuck in a shitty job alone. I couldn’t even be of any help to my friends who were going through shit just instead being fucking weird or just not being able to be there for them properly. I’m a piece of shit I didn’t even visit my nan going through cancer, my mates going through shit rn and I feel like I’m fucking useless not being able to help him. I’m always saying and doing the wrong shit I feel like I’m always fucking up. I’m struggling with who I am I’ve been thinking through possible adhd but I feel like I’m just faking it to make myself feel better about being the way I am. I feel like a fucking zombie my head just feels empty now and I can’t even talk to my friends that I’ve known for like a year now I struggle to make conversation with them and I feel fucking pathetic. I tried jumping off a cliff but couldn’t even get the courage to do it I even fucked that up

[FIRST][LAST]
Atlantis Commission
Officer Report - Lieutenant Colonel John Shepard
CLEARANCE LEVEL 5
Well this had definitely been a very interesting couple of hours. This dimension and its people had very odd opinions and ideas. Apparently the prey species of this dimension were all obligate cowards, whose instincts compelled them to be non-violent and run from threats. At least according to themselves. There were apparently some of them who were “predator diseased” as they called it, a disease which often resulted in increased violence, aggression, lack of empathy, and unheard like behavior. It sounded to me like some form of infectious psychopathy, but the venlil assured us it shouldn't affect us since we were predators, which didn’t really ease my fears, but hopefully it was something we could figure out when we got home if it ever became a problem.
Gotta love mandatory quarantine periods woo hoo!
As scary as this odd disease sounded, my main concern at the moment was to try and turn a professed coward into someone who could at the very least defend themselves.
I looked down to the table of gear ahead of me and then over to the mostly naked Venlil to my side, and then even farther to Tiel’c who thought It would be a good idea to help oversee Farva’s rapid fire training course. I fiddled with the bluetooth earpiece which was rigged up to one of our handhelds to run a translation program to speak directly with the captain. A big step up from our unknowingly one sided communications earlier.
I stepped on the other side of the plastic table and placed my hands down upon it and looked on at my new student..
“Welcome Captain Farva to our very impromptu accelerated course on Human arms armor and basic infantry tactics.” I said gesturing to the hodge podge gear we had managed to assemble for the good captain. “Are we ready to begin?”.
She flicked her ears, somewhat nervously by the looks.
“I’d take it that's a yes then?”
“Oh yes sorry”
“Alright then, well given that most of our crew is human and the only other alien struts around naked all the time, the only gear we have on hand is for humans, So you're going to be running size smalls and it's all going to fit all a bit big” I say as I toss her the tactical vest. ”Here try this on, we can try to tighten it up if it's a bit loose anywhere”. The captain wrestles with the buckles a bit, and Teal'c helps her tighten up some of the top straps, as the Venil’s shoulders weren't as broad as humans. Farva gave Teal’c an odd look, but seemed appreciative none the less.Once finished, she grasped the vest in her paws with interest. “This armor seems quite lightweight, which is nice, weight is often an issue that causes us to forgo armor, since heavy armor would hurt our running ability.” Farva remarks. “Also the sheer amount of pockets seems quite excessive, what do you need all these for?”
“Well for starters it's currently missing these '' I hand Farva one of the armor plates which she looks over. “That is a depleted Naquadria ceramic composite plate. It’s designed to stop bullet impacts and dissipate energy weapon blasts. It slots into that chest compartment in the front and back of your armor.”
“This isn't quite what Id imagine for the armor of your kind”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Well judging by your ships I would have imagined you would put more emphasis on defense Your predatory nature would make you less likely to run away from conflict allowing for more encompassing armor to cover more than just your chest, since you have less need to run.”
She would put it like that.
“Well there are a number of reasons for that, a lot to do with those excess pockets you mentioned. For starters you will not be carrying the same amount of gear that the standard infantry unit would normally be carrying, we are preparing you for a quick in and out op. Normally us expedition teams need to be deployed into unknown territory for extended periods of time, we need to carry everything we might need with us from food, bullets, weapons, to comms gear, sensors, repelling equipment etc. The weight from all that gear adds up fast; In order to stay sufficiently mobile and combat effective; we only carry enough armor to protect our vitals, head and torso, anything else can hopefully be patched up by a field medic.”
Tielc gave his piece as well. “It is important to know when to run both towards and aways from one's foes, not every battle can be won through strength alone, but by strategy and cunning. Being able to reposition oneself quickly is therefore highly advantageous”
Farva seemed to freeze at Teal'c's statement, not out of fear I think, she instead had a distant look in her eye. To snap her out of her slump I handed her a standard ballistic helmet.
Seeming to get the idea she looked at it oddly and tried it on. It confirmed to her head shape decently well but depressed her ears to either side of her head, kind of resembling what one might imagine a sad bunny rabbit to look like “I don't think this will be something I can bring with me” she said ” I can't use ear signals and this will muffle my hearing.”
“Why don’t you keep it on for the time being, I think any extra hearing protection might be useful considering what we are about to try next.” I hand Farva some ballistic ear protectors, slightly modified and somewhat ramshackle. “One of the corporals worked closely with Nurse Fila to get an idea for safe decibels levels for your kind, we were also able to get these earbuds molded to fit into your ear canal better”
Farva took them and slipped them in. “These are a bit uncomfortable, what do I need these for?”
“You'll need them for this” I say as I unsnap the clasps on the weapons case revealing its contents.
The content seems to capture Farva’s interest, getting a slight tail wave.
“Okay So this here is a p90, It carries a 50 round top loading magazine of teflon coated armor piercing ordnance. With a cyclical rate of fire of 900 rounds per minute.”
Farvas ears perk up at this. “This seems like an efficient design, I take it these are a flashlight and laser sight for accuracy?” She asked, pointing to the top of the weapon.
“Yes we also have holographic and acog optics which will help line up targets from farther away.” I look on as Farva picks up the weapon and inspects it, testing the weight as I note that it will weigh a fair bit more once loaded. But she doesn't seem to be struggling with the weight. I can't help but notice good firearm safety as well, she keeps her finger well off the trigger and takes care to keep her weapon pointed aways from anyone else.
“This seems like a solid design but I'm not sure how useful those weapon optics would be, as they are not designed for my side facing eyes”
“I'm sure our master at arms can figure something out, why don't we give it a test fire first tho, before we send it off to make adjustments.” I instruct her on how to load the weapon and turn the safety off. I warn her of the sound it makes. And while definitely taken aback by the recoil and sound at first, she quickly gets the hang of it, she has some respectable shot groupings in both single fire and in short bursts. And keeps the rounds reasonably centered while firing in full auto.
She did a whole lot better than I would have initially suspected given her performance in the hanger bay a day before.
“The rate of fire seems useful” Farva spoke “This would be useful for our soldiers, our accuracy falters when we are panicked, and the increased shot count should guarantee some hits based on volume of fire alone” she finished with a dejected expression.
She quickly places the weapon back in its case, as if it burned to touch.” I don't know if I should be armed for this mission, at least not with that weapon, I don't want to miss and hit one of you in the back!”
“What? Nonsense, you are a great shot, and this is just a precaution in case we get separated or flanked and need some covering fire. If our guys are doing their job right you shouldn't need to fire a single round anyways.”
Captain Farva’s breathing started to hasten, earlier I might have thought it was fear, but I was starting to get an idea of what the captain's issues were. I’ve seen this before.
“I.. I can’t be trusted with this responsibility, every time I am left in charge of something, every time people put their lives in my paws I ....”
“Farva, don’t you start with me now you hear.” I said sternly, swiftly capping off her inevitable spiral of self doubt.
“But.. no.. you don’t understand”
Stopping her again I spoke. “But nothing, what happened before on that ship, and back at that colony is in the past. I don’t know your whole situation, but from what I have gathered from the crew It was nothing good. You feel responsible and it's eating away at you, and frankly it doesn’t matter if that's true or not. Accidents happen, people make mistakes, and when that happens we need to learn, take those lessons to heart, and don't let it stop us from helping people in the present. If you let guilt, or fear of mistakes stop you, then bad guys have already won, all without having to have fired a shot”
Farva is quiet for a short time, I was hoping I got through to her, I'm not the best and pep talks and this certainly wasn’t your typical weapons demo, if only everyones could go as smoothly as Ronan’s.
Farva spoke quietly, arms pressed up against her chest, she looked so sad, defeated, and small. Well more than usual anyways. “We can't be strong like you humans, we are too emotional and when we are scared we run away or we lock up and...”
“And that is clearly not the case with you captain Farva” Teal’c finally reentered the conversation having heard enough. “You have shown courage with every action you have taken so far, your actions have saved the lives of many of your crew, every time you have been threatened you acted not just to protect yourself but others as well. You attempted to contend with beings many times your size without even thinking about it, all in the effort to protect others, and this is only in the time we have known you, this speaks nothing of your actions over the colony. You are a warrior of admirable courage Captain Farva, your self doubt is unearned.”
A single tear rolled down Farva’s eyes which she quickly wiped away. “That was very nice of you to say, but I'm not brave like you say, I was terrified out of my mind the whole time.”
Teal’c looked puzzled. “I did not call you brave, I said you were courageous.”
Farva shot back with the little venlil one up one down ear flick I had very quickly learned was confusion.” I'm confused you just said brave twice”
“Hmm it appears your language does not contain the word I am using, I apologize I am not used to speaking through a translator” Teal’c relented “ There are two words I am using admittedly in slightly different forms, bravery and courage. Bravery or to be brave is to lack fear, to not be afraid to begin with. Courage tho, Is a trait far more admirable. Courage is to be afraid, to have fear, to worry about one's own mortality and personal safety. It is to acknowledge risk, danger, to feel fear, but to act in spite of it.”
“Had I not met your kind before I would have thought predators don't feel fear.”
“Everyone fears feel Farva, It is how we overcome it that determines our worth as warriors”
Teal’c picks up the p90 and returns it to Farvas hands.
“Your people need a warrior Farva, a warrior who protects the innocent and guides the lost to safety. You have shown how collected you can be in the heat of battle, You have already proven your worth in our eyes Farva, now you must do the same in your own. The greatest enemy lies not without” Teal’c places his hand firmly on the venlil’s chest “But within”.
After Action Report - Venlil Colonial Defense Force
Subject : Chief Engineer Donu
I fiddled with my holopad, Its small surface area proving to be a consistent source of annoyance in my current endeavor. Gone was the large workspace afforded to me by my holotable back in my office. Instead I had to work with the scaled down portable holotablet I was just fortunate enough to have strapped to my person when I was beamed away from our last ship. I was stuck with its smaller keyboard and slower rendering speeds.
An annoyed smooth skin alien looked over my shoulder at my device, attached to it was a jury rigged fiber optic cable, slotted into a terran silicon to crystal patch cable, which would convert the electrical signals broadcasted by my tablet into a bandwidth that the terrans crystalline based computers; which they used for highly complex tasks like hyperdrive and transporter systems; could use, and then It was patched again in a even stranger connector to patch into the odd asgard computer stones.
All in all it looked like someone tried to plug a regular computer into some crystal construct like you would find in a fantasy holonovel, and again plugged that into a harchen heat rock sauna lounge. Finally branching out from this conglomeration was a simple copper based wire that connects to a computer terminal at which currently sat the late Doctor Rodney Mckay. A title upon initially hearing led me to believe he was a medical doctor, which led to a flurry of medical questions that he had absolutely no means of answering.
While this odd alien nomenclature was interesting, what intrigued me more was his actual area of expertise, theoretical astrophysics, as well as a number of other diverse specialties and fields. Not to mention not only was he a great scientist who had he been raised in the more civilized portion of this galaxy, would have knowledge and aptitude that would put him alongside some of Aafas greatest minds, but he was also an engineer without peer, at least in this galaxy. His interactions with general Samantha Carter hinted at her possibly being his match if not more. For a species that was supposed to glorify violence the decision to have a scientist be arguably the most senior member of what was by their admission a military vessel spoke to their commitment to knowledge and understanding, a very noble prey-like goal.
I looked warily at the lines of code at my screen, the asguard translation program had earlier scanned our ship and was able to parse written languages, but complex files, like images and 3d design schematics were harder to encode and decode from our perspective systems. As is stands we have 3 completely separate computer architectures, the asguard can talk to human computers and the venlil computers can talk to the asguard computers, It sounds like we would have everything we need to get a human C.A.D schematic into a venlil holotablet right? Wrong! And you're stupid for entertaining such a idiotic notion! Parsing text from raw binary is relatively straight forward, you're just looking for patterns, repeating bit combinations that might infer letters and then iterating them over millions of times looking for patterns, letters, words, and then with a bit of help from some undecoded analog audio transmission, spoken language. This is a far cry from actual procedural communication protocols,the ones that allow for file transfers, exactly what we needed if we were to get Rodney's redesigned part schematics into a format and medium that can be plugged into a suitable fabricator. Assuming one still exists, which I can reasonably assume it does.
Speaking of which, I have just made something of a breakthrough. For upon my screen appears a simple geometric hydrogen cube, we’re talking vertices, planes, material data, everything we need for a usable design file.
I let out an excited pent up yip, the culmination of hours of frustrating software integration work. Unfortunately I startled Rodney, who lets out a panicked gasp and clutches his chest pelts with one of his paws.
“Oh god…..” He gasps, pointing at me “Please.. don’t do that”
“Sorry!” I say a bit meekly. I slowly approach him so as to not make him unnecessarily uncomfortable and show him my work.
“I got the file exchange set up, all we need from you is to finish any modifications to your part, upload them to my holopad, and then we can print away at any class 3 or above fabricator we can scrounge up on Brayga colony.”
“Ok.. um.. got it, I'm almost done i’m just you know” He points a lone grasping appendage at his screen,”Running some simulations, making sure everything is up to spec.” keeping his response kurt. “Sorry for freaking out there.”
I nod my head in the human display of affirmation and return to my workstation to further bug check my work, to test potentially problematic edge cases for when he finishes. Tho Rodney's continued odd behavior intruded on my thoughts.
I should have felt empowered, being able to intimidate this ‘massive beast’, but I didn't. I didn't like being feared, his people have been nice to me, Rodney himself courteous to a fault and desperate for positive attention.
I thought I could expect predators to be fearless but that clearly wasn't the case, rodney was fearful, nervous, had I not known better I would say defective, and while it annoyed his crew, they didn't berate him for it, or attempt to assert dominance, they encouraged it even with placating words and tried to help him through it, they encouraged and supported him like a proper herd, even if sometimes it took the form of what the human would call a playful ribbing. I supposed I could help him as well.
I approached him again, careful to make my approach known to him, making sure to approach from within his limited field of vision. He looks up at me with a wide eyed glare, had I not known him I might have assumed it was hunger, but I did and knew it to be concern.
“Uh high Donu.. um whats up?”
“Why are you afraid of us rodney?”
“Wa-What, me afraid?” he gives out a panicked laugh ”uh no no, I'm not afraid, you know just a bit weirded out I'm just getting used to you all, it's not a fear thing it's a a…. Just getting used to new aliens thing, ask Hermirod we went through this whole song and dance right buddy”
Hermirod furrowed his brow and gave an irritated sigh from across the room.
I reached out to take Rodney by the paw.
His whole body flinched at my mere touch, I quickly withdrew my paw.
“Oh.. um.. I didn't…”
“Rodney! It's okay, your crew doesn’t seem to care when you show fear, and neither do I. Why are you afraid of us? You are almost twice our size and surely double our strength, most venlil would scream and run in terror at the mere sight of you. What's wrong?”
Rodney let out a sigh. “Oh its, we don't have to talk about this, I can deal with this, I deal with scary situations all the time, it's fine, I'll be fine.”
“Rodney, my people are a very emotional, empathic people, we are open with our feelings and with our fear, and the fear of the one can affect the herd, please let me help you. I don’t know what to expect from your society but I promise I wont judge you for your fear or emotions, I mean look at many of my crew mates, we are no one to judge”
Rodney shot back “You didn't seem to be so bothered”
“I’m too old to care, I was about to retire, hell I was about to die as far as I knew, Brayga colony was supposed to be a quiet place to lay back, work on some hobbies, plant a garden and pester the young men of my colony until I either dropped dead of boredom or got lucky” I joked.
That seemed to raise Rodney's mood somewhat. He sighed and seemingly relented.
“It’s… a dumb story, I don't even know why it affected me so much, I come from a place on earth called Canada, people don't usually believe me when I say I am from there, us Canadians are notoriously friendly and I guess I haven’t exactly filled that mold for a lot of my life, but hey I'm working on it, people like me, I have lots of friends back at Atlantis” He says the last sentence in a way as if it isn't me he's trying to convince.
“I'm sure you do, Rodney, You seem like quite the charming individual when you're not cowering!”
“Ha ha thanks, maybe you could come and visit sometime. Tell that to doctor Becket, really nice guy, smart man, he would love to meet you, he loves investigating new species. But back on topic, oh boy, so me and my sister Jeannie were on a family trip to rural Vancouver to visit my grandpa's farm, he kept a lot of goats, not for eating or anything, they were essentially pets that he would use for milk”
“Wait hold on? You drink milk from other animals! Do your females not produce enough milk for their young?”
“Oh um no, we just sort of drink it or ferment it into cheese!”
“Ferment? You mean spoil?
“Yeh”
I reeled from this plasma blast of a statement, I like any right minded venlil had a number of nightmares about being an arxur’s cattle before, especially when I first learned about those things in primary school, but never once had it crossed my mind that we could be used for something so weird. What the speh was I supposed to do with that information?
“Maybe you should get back on topic”
“Yeh sorry about that uh.. Anyways the momma goat had just had a litter of babies, and their real cute when their little, so late in the day when my grandpa was asleep we snuck out to the pens so we can play with the little baby goats, our grandpa told us not to but you now how kids are.”
At this I think back to a young Nyan, as I teach him the inner working of the hyperdrive, I tell him he’s not cleared yet to operate in this engine compartment alone, but I could tell from the occasional caught black hairs and dropped writing implements, there had been a number of curious unauthorized expeditions into its inner workings, he didn't really listen either.
“My sister as always was trying to be the voice of reason, wanting to take it slow. If I was paying attention I might have noticed the angry moma goat who didn’t appreciate the strange human messing with her children.”
The color seemed to drain from his face.
“I uh…” He began to stutter again ”I screamed, a lot, it was rather undignified, she ran right at me, thank god it wasn't a male goat, one with horns, I tired to run but I was hit in the back and knocked over and kicked real good in the head, like wake up in the vet clinic a quarter mile down the road kind of bad”
“This goat was a prey animal?”
“That would be what your kind focuses on”
“Oh sorry”
“Anyways It seems dumb but I have just never been good with animals since then, especially ones that look like you; no offense; I'm getting better but when I first saw you guys in the hangar bay, I was just that dumb kid again, getting in way over my head, scared for my life. I guess there is something to be said about childhood trauma. I really should be over this, I'm getting better with it I swear it’s just”
I take his paw again, he doesn't flinch this time.
“I'm a venlil, a prey animal, I know fear, I know what it is to live in fear, It rattles your brain, it turns your paws to wet grains. It takes great strength to overcome it, to push it aside just long enough to protect the herd. Your herd relies on you Rodney and you are doing a great job in spite of your fear, in spite of having to work with those you fear. You have achieved intellectual feats that rival the greatest minds of the federation and all that while struggling with a traumatic experience. Fear isn’t dumb and there is nothing wrong with you for feeling it.”
“Thank you” Rodney says “That means a lot, I won't be like forever I promise, I just need some time.”
“We will laugh about this someday,” I assured. “Nothing as big and intelligent as you should be afraid of anything”
“Are you calling me fat?” Rodney exclaimed with fake offense.
We both chuckled.
My kind words had resulted in a more upright posture, and a more cheerful demeanor from the human, almost like when I congratulated Nyan on his work, and it got me a look at that happy snarl of his, that I was starting to grow quite fond of.
After Action Report - Venlil Colonial Defense Force
Subject : Apprentice Engineer Nyan
Oh wow! I get to write a report for this mission! I never get to write reports, Donu says they're too boring, but there’s so many interesting things going on all the time. Sometimes I sneakily write my own! Just for fun of course, nobody sees them, which is probably for the best as I sometimes get excited and embellish them slightly. One of the reports I wrote was about the time Donu used nothing but a wad of electrical tape, a bottle of high grain venlil alcohol and a pocket knife to repair a venlil medical ship just in time to get out of the way of a big scary space predator, with glowing red eyes and a million tentacles!
Anyways Im not sure If im suppose to write these In present tense first person or past tense. I asked the captain and she said it's whatever so long as I make sure any pertinent dialogues are properly quoted(“”).
“Nobody usually reads these things anyways.” She said, but this one is surely going to be so exciting, who could look away!
I mean who's gonna scoff at a chance to read about friendly predators from another dimension! A dimension of friendly predators who give warm head scratches and hand out yummy strayu not strayu treats called donuts, that are somehow fluffier than strayu, and have a nice moisture to them. I asked for the recipe but Samantha said we wouldn't have the ingredients back on Venili prime to make them, and Teal'c said the recipe is an old family secret. Its weird predators would be so protective of their plant snacks.
There are so many weird things about these predators, they have nurturing instincts that make them find us cute. They stay perfectly balanced even if they don’t have tails, swinging their arms and body all over the place to keep upright like a lopsided gyroscope, it's pretty funny looking!
They also wear artificial pelts all the time, which I thought was weird, I thought maybe the ships temperature was set by the angry gray alien since he’s the only crew member beside the venlil who walks around naked all the time, maybe he had a fit when it was to warm, and the humans obliged him cause they were worried they would make him even angrier, and wore clothes to make up for the cold. I thought this made sense, a lot of their technology does seem to come from the Asguard, maybe he has more say in the goings on of the ship because of that. But apparently humans just like wearing pelts all the time. They feel uncomfortable without them and don’t like it if you try to remove them or look up their upper artificial pelts they call shirts.
The humans are so weird, I don’t even have to embellish my reports to make it more interesting. Like that time with the big tentacled space predator. That may sound real compared to this stuff but it Isn't, Ha! I bet you fell for it at first, hook line and sinker! Like the humans would say. I think I used that saying right, I'm not sure what it means, but Shepard brought it up when he was telling a story about the wraith.
The humans are so nice, instead of exterminating their predators they try to cure them! Their doctors are working to modify the wraith so they don't have to eat humans anymore, so they can be friendly predators too.
Anyways I should probably get to the actual report part of this report. Farva says I should start after I went off with Samantha to work on some special astrophysics equations she said I would be good at. I kind of wanted to go with Donu to help Rodney get the new parts they needed, or Farva to help rescue our people, but the humans and even the angry gray alien got really weird when Farva mentioned taking me on the mission. Samantha seemed to want me to help her really badly so I didn’t mind. Samantha says I have the most important part to our mission. She's teaching me about how humans communicate through subspace, and about stellar drift equations. We are working on what she calls the exit strategy.

Aries: passionate at making out, passive personality but physically really dominant and protective, good at massages, wraps you in their arm when walking, little pecks on the top of the head and cheek
Taurus: wraps you in a hug every time they see you, tells you how cute you are everyday, tries cooking meals for you, lots of humorous banter, makes bad jokes to make you laugh, brings you flowers
Gemini: reserved when you first meet them but talks a lot when you get closer, lies in bed with you all day, lots of pda, holds your hand all the time, likes to listen to your goals and encourage you
Cancer: peppers you in kisses, really bashful about it though, makes you giggle a lot, likes more outgoing partners to bring them out of their shells, has cute quirks that you fall in love with, very sensitive
Leo: will hold your hand a lot while taking you on a new adventure, takes a lot of pictures of and with you, will sing and dance crazy with you, smiles at you for no reason, shows you lots of affection
Virgo: kind of shy about getting physical with you, brings you cute, thoughtful gifts, knows how to cheer you up even if you don’t want to smile, says corny lovey-dovey things to you
Libra: takes you on elaborate dates, stays up late talking to you, makes sure you’re okay, tight hugs, breaths in your scent, likes to just stare at and admire your face, late-night talks
Scorpio: is really awkward when they first start dating you, slightly less awkward throughout, sends you suggestive memes, seductive stares and sheepish smiles, can get jealous
Sagittarius: always wanting to try new things with you, gets wild once you get to know them better, dirty talk, gives you the smoldering look a lot, tells you stories, wants to please you
Capricorn: teases you a lot, ruffles your hair, gives you strangely adorable nicknames, goes on movie marathons with you, compliments you a lot, can seem rigid at first but underneath is lovable
Aquarius: tickles you and turns into making out, is really chill, plays video games with you, loves running their hand through your hair, encourages you to have fun even if you’ve had a bad day
Pisces: loves cuddling and spooning, will just look at their partner and think how pretty they are, makes playlists for you, remembers every little thing you tell them, lets you know how much they love you

I'm totally new to the bowl and read a lot in this sub before deciding to share my story here. So please be gentle with me as I seek answers and advices from more experienced people in this community. Sorry for the novel.
This is my story:
I'm a Canadian female in her mid-30's. Since the nature of my work allows me to work 100% remotly, I finally realised a big goal of mine this year and spent the winter in the Caribbean. Six months of winter is not really my forte haha! I really enjoyed the lifestyle and made a lot of wonderful friends. Needless to say, I was living my best life in my bikinis, soaking up the tropical sun.
And when I thought things couldn't get any better, I met this man, an American in is mid-50's through mutual friends at a bar. He was obvioulsy very interested in me and wanted to go on a date. I vanilla dated older guys before (10y) but never someone with that age gap. That said, I'm in a point in my life where I'm over dating boys who don't have their act together. I want a man who will elevate me, not drags me down. Plus, our mutual friends being sneaky little matchmakers that they are lol, told me that he was a real gentleman and a very successful businessman. Off to a good start!
We clicked on our first date and discovered that we had A LOT in common. He too works remotely, except when he has occasional meetings in the States, we both loveeeee to travel, we both practice water sports, we both grew up skiing, and the list goes on. He actually stays in the Caribbean almost half the year since it's his second residency.
For the first three weeks or so, we dated 3-4 times a week, mostly for diner dates and fun activities on the weekend. He spoiled me so much, sending lunch deliveries everyday, flowers and gifts, etc. And then we started to get intimate and had so much fun in the bedroom which I think was a relief for both of us haha!
But then, not long after, I lost my main client and source of income (thanks to the recession -_- ). I was so stressed out and heartbroken that my dream life of traveling while working remotly might slip throught my fingers after working sooo hard to get there. When I told him about my financial struggles, he would answer back not to worry about money. But then I was thinking to myself that diner dates and gifts don't pay my bills lol.
So after reading many many posts in here on SLF, I took matters into my own hands and sat down with him to ask him what he meant by "not worrying about money". He told me that he would cover all my bills from now on, but that he didn't want me to stay with him just because of the money, which I thought was fair. I couldn't spend that much time with someone whose company I didn't enjoy anyway. I told him I'd be comfortable with an allowance agreement and he agreed on an amount higher then my monthly salary. He replied that he'd never done that for a girl before when I asked him, as it was the first time for me too. I was a little surprised when he told me this because he behaved like a SD by spoiling me and taking care of me like he did. He also gave me what we jokingly call a starter package lol of the generous amount of xx,xxx to invest money for my retirement. I just couldn't believe it tbh but my bank account surely did!
Since then, we've spent a week at his place in the States, before heading off a week later to another city for a music festival. We really had a blast. It had been a very long time since I'd had so much fun and felt so comfortable and valued with a man. After the festival, I went home to Canada and he went back to his home. The plan was to meet up again in NYC before going on a two-week trip to Europe. The plan was also for me to stay on my own for two more weeks in Europe to visit friends. But he cancelled the trip at the last minute because a family member had a medical emergency on the day I was due to fly, and also because shit hit the fan at work. He felt so bad about it, even though I reminded him that he couldn't control such events. Still, he rebooked all my flights and accommodation so I could go and see my friends and spend a summer vacation in Europe. Again I just couldn't believe it!
Over the past few months, I've met some of his family members and closest friends. He is divorced and on good terms with his ex-wife. He had a girlfriend in his age range for a while. Both ex-wife and ex-girlfriend are very successful ladies. He also dated younger hot girls hehe. We have great communication and honesty with each other. We make each other laugh. It's so nice to have someone who cares for me the way he does. This sounds like a made-up story, believe me, even sometimes I wonder why me haha!
My questions for you would be:

1. Is he a SD? Is he a SBF? I know he doesn't really like the term SD
2. Does it make me a SB? Or a SGF? Or something else?
3. What is your experience with on and off long-distance SR? Ex: 2-3 months together then 1-2 months long-distance and so on
4. Long-distance SD or SBF, when visit your SB ou SGF, do you prefer going to a hotel or to her place?

Thank you so much for reading this!

Hey Aaron, Please read this all the way through. I promise I’m not a troll or “hater.” I want to start this out as honestly as possible. I don’t enjoy your personality or content. I think your opinions are childish and antiquated. I’m not your target audience and I’m only aware of you because you’ve become a lolcow.
I’ve always felt really bad for lolcows. So many of them are autistic or impaired in some other way. Usually they’re so far gone that there’s no real helping them and they’re just destined to forever be the butt of online tween bullying. But I think you can still save yourself if you act quickly enough.
You need to be honest about what happened. There’s no contextualizing the divorce in any other way. You can’t convince us that we’re the weird ones for being curious about your personal life. All you did was dig into the personal lives of your subjects.
You need to acknowledge that you severely stained April’s life. When she applies for her next job people are going to send her supervisors pics of her making goofy faces at the place George Floyd was killed and videos of her making jokes about his death while crying with happiness over your proposal. And they’re not morally wrong to do it either. You put her words out there into society and now don’t think we should consider them while forming our opinions of her. It doesn’t work that way. You made her into a target Aaron.
There’s nothing wrong with a normal job bro. I have a blue collar union job and I guarantee I make more than you do. I know because I’ve seen the goals and what you pull in. Just stop destroying your life and your wives lives and, eventually, your children’s lives with this nonsense. Losing everything ain’t worth $400 a day man.
Please get out of this before you transcend the Dabbleverse and enter the public zeitgeist. Because once they see you, it’s fully over.
Best of Luck, Just Some Guy

So, I'm seeing some mixed reactions to the last season, and honestly I'm feeling them myself as well, so I decided to sit down and sort of breakdown and analyse some of what happened over the course of Oxventure, what seemed to go well and what didn't, and maybe try to get into some litcrit of the whole thing.
Warning: I'm not always nice in this write up, though I have done my best to be fair and honest throughout in what I think the potential pitfalls were and how I hope they might be better addressed in future campaigns.
I've played D&D myself for a few years, listened to other Actual Play series (notably NADDPOD and some D20 at one end of the competency-of-players scale, and Dragon Friends and Dungeons and Drongos at the other), and write... a lot. Including over 250k of fanfic specifically for Oxventure, which started off as an excuse for smut but ended up being a lot of worldbuilding.

System & Setting

Johnny has made no secret that they're not a huge fan of D&D, indicating that they feel it overshadows other systems, and given that the Spicy Rat Caper was meant to be a one-off but fans loved it perhaps they felt a little trapped in the system. This did lead to some funny moments (Faire Trial and Max commenting that they sometimes felt "like a big dice rolling around a tray" sticks with me) but sometimes felt a bit mean-spirited ("Crawl Me Maybe" and the heavy 'lol dungeon crawling is so ridiculous' comes to mind).
It was also clear that at times, none of the group seemed to know the game and the rules super well. From Mike not knowing his movement speed ("30 what? Miles an hour?") to Merilwen not using her animal forms or changing out her spells until level 8, to the underpowering of most of the classes, it became more of an issue as time when on in some ways.
It's easy enough to understand why, live on stage and starry-eyed at Harry McEntire as Aubrey, Johnny missed that in the combat Aubrey cast two levelled spells in the same round (against the rules) as well as using two sorcery spell modifiers in the same round (also against the rules, and they mentioned this on the podcast). Sorcerer was also a new class to everyone, and dealing with a new class is always going to be difficult, especially dropping them in at a higher level rather than starting from level 1 and building up.
However, bluntly, most of the guild weren't using their class/subclass abilities to the fullest. Rules lawyer Andy did the best, so he gets a pass here, and Ellen got sharper with Merilwen over time to stuff like knowing her spell components, tracking her spell slots, and preparing her spells. However, the concept of Egbert as "a paladin who doesn't do paladin things" (quote from the post-Deadlands discussion) was ultimately really limiting not just for Egbert (Mike commented in one podcast episode that he felt he'd trapped himself in only using Egbert's abilities in ways that were funny) but for the entire concept of paladins - Max might as well have been a fighter in the fight in Gnome Alone that they took part in, and we never saw Shattershield fight at all. There were references to combat offscreen in Out of Order, but... that was it. (Additionally, while paladins can be poisoned, as poison and disease are different in 5e rules, paladins can pump out a LOT of healing, and a citadel full of them should have a lot of magical reserves to draw on as a result.)
And Egbert isn't the only one who was limited. One of the biggest features of Great Old One warlocks (which Prudence is, with Cthulhu), is that from level one they have telepathy within 30ft ("Awakened Mind"). Prudence went the entire campaign without using this. Although Johnny allowed the Message cantrip to be treated like this, allowing people to reply to it when RAW it is one-way only, this meant that Dob also essentially gained Prudence's power because he also had Message. Merilwen was limited in her animal forms and the spells that she knew up until level 8, and it was noticeable how everyone was shocked at her power once she had full RAW druid range. Corazón, on the other hand, not only had Andy keeping on top of all of his class and subclass features, but got two subclasses, leaving him about on par or slightly overpowered for the level he should have been looking overpowered because the others didn't use their abilities so well. Meanwhile, Dob was given access to full bardic abilities, but only used bardic inspiration in some of their level 1 adventures and then not much again until the final season.
The counterpart to this under-utilisation of class potential was the amount of 'rule of cool' or 'rule of funny' which sometimes worked well (Merilwen befriending the owlbear in Quiet Riot, or the reflavouring of Thunder Wave to do lightning damage instead based on their initial misunderstanding) and sometimes ended up breaking the game (the "everyone can cast Moonbeam" joke that escalated to the scrolls of Moonbeam that made the finale kind of laughable). Sometimes this seemed to be the time and audience pressure of live shows (allowing Prudence to use the hammer to wheel her way through the skeletons in Stop Hammer Time), but other times it was just letting them do things that went outside the rules (Egbert body-slamming six(?) Otherberts at once in Bad Altitude, or Dob casting all his spells at once in Corpse and Robbers) seemingly preferring the immediate humour or "yes and" over the potential internal logic or end implications.
The contrast between this permissiveness, sometimes to the point of breaking logical immersion, honestly seemed sharper to me when it was laid against Andy's GMing in Deadlands. Whether it was reminding people that there were snipers on the rooftops in Dead Man's Worth or refusing to yes-and a chandelier in More Wonders Than, he made it more difficult for the players and in doing so made them work harder within their skillsets and the setting, making the victories feel harder-won as a result. I'm aware that some people didn't like Andy's GMing specifically because he was less permissive, but I believe that his intention - and the outcome - was a stronger narrative that made the characters feel active and not just lucky. (Liliana lampshaded this in Frenemy at the Gates when she asked whether things often just fell into their laps, like with knowing Binbag, and it almost felt like a spiteful comment so it surprised me to hear it from Johnny.)
What I hope: It has been indicated that Johnny has created the new setting for the next game, so hopefully they have put things more to their liking at the beginning and will not end up seeming to dunk on the premise of their own series. I'm also hoping for everyone to either use more standardised rules, or at least establish in-game standards at the beginning so that all of the characters, and players, feel like they're on a level playing field from the off. Johnny seemed to much more enjoy the systems of Blades in the Dark and Deadlands (which were designed to be less superhero-level) and even the lower levels of Oxventure (especially Tier 1) where the characters were just people who were skilled but not particularly out of the range of normality; I'd be interested to see whether they lean more in that direction and keep the characters lower-powered as a result.

Characters & Character Arcs

Again, it's worth noting that the characters were initially conceived as being for a one-off game, so the initial concepts did not necessarily need planned arcs. However, the rockiness of some of the arcs overall may have contributed to issues with the series, especially as it stretched out over so many years. I'll go through the PCs alphabetically, then Liliana, then mention any other NPCs. There are two elements here - in-character goals, and character arc goals, which both play into things.
Corazón - in my opinion, Corazón had one of the stronger character arcs, which may reflect Andy's interest in writing (and now being published!), going from the coward pirate-wannabe who abandoned his crew to the curse, to the person who threw himself in front of a spell meant for Merilwen. This was highlighted in his reply to Them in Prism Break, even before the Power Word Kill spell. In fact, the Power Word Kill brought a level of pathos to the fact that he had told Them that he was not even done growing as a person. Andy commented on the podcast at some point that he had expected at the beginning to be one of the more morally shady characters (as a pirate), but found himself playing a line of being immoral regarding money but caring deeply about physical hurt or harm to people. Corazón also had two layers of in-character goals - to break the curse (limited) and to become a betterichereal pirate (more open-ended) and find his own identity which allowed him to carry character development over the years even when the curse was ignored for extended periods. Goals: clear and stepped, with the curse as a plot-hook; arc: good and perfectly timed for the finale.
What I hope for: More of the same, really.
Dob - Dob came in early with a clearly defined goal (to find his sister) - but this was done in Brawl of the Wild and Dob has been sort of... undefined ever since. It absolutely makes sense that he would have floundered for a while, but Dob has gone several years without settling on new goal, and Luke also didn't seem to settle on a character arc (the romance subplot in Orbpocalypse Saga through Bride or Die seemed to be almost a character arc, but never got full payoff?) which left Dob feeling... well, at times it almost seemed like Luke wanted to get rid of him to play someone else instead. This was unfortunately also highlighted in conversation with Them, as the response that Dob gave was about him being a "mote of chaos". I obviously couldn't speak for others, but I found this underwhelming and unconvincing as an answer, as it didn't give me any sense of why a powerful celestial being would consider this an argument - if Dob had developed the argument to be that chaos is generative and creative in a way that pure order cannot be, and/or that the free will and agency of sapience demand that they be allowed to act and to try even if they make mistakes or fail, I think there might have been something there, but he didn't really seem to. Goals: had one which formed a good plot-hook, then went without; arc: unclear.
What I hope for: Luke to determine more of a character arc, or series of shorter arcs, perhaps drawing from his Blades in the Dark DMing experience, and to either pick a more open-ended goal or to move along a series of goals over time.
Egbert - Egbert came in with the vaguer goal of "atonement", which gave him more wiggle room, but unfortunately didn't seem to actively pursue it a lot of the time. In Legacy of Dragons it was revealed that he was searching for atonement for the deaths of two Dragon D'Or members - but by this time, so many people around the Oxventurers had died, including innocent bystanders, that the deaths of two other paladins felt like nothing. (Mike commented, again on the podcast, that he agreed with the commenters at the time who agreed that they knew it was his backstory from the beginning because only two paladins had died. The two figure paled next to the collateral damage that the party later caused.) Mike also commented on the podcast that during lockdown, he had made a conscious change with Egbert in to try to avoid combat as much as possible, and to avoid fatal attacks if in combat, but it wasn't clear how long that lasted. It may have been trying to avoid being the annoying/preachy paladin that stopped him from trying to influence the rest of the party or to save lives around them, but unfortunately it meant that it was difficult to see a real sense of wanting to atone in Egbert's arc. Letting innocents die around him isn't exactly less culpable than killing them himself. (Notable incidents included Mule Be Sorry, Wrangle in the Tangle, Hag Reflex, and Squid Pro Quo.) In terms of character arcs, there was definitely an element of going from seeking approval from Dragon D'Or to seeking that of his friends, but that was just a switching of approval-seeking rather than a significant change. Goals: had one, but didn't seem to actively pursue it; arc: moved from pursuing the morals of Dragon D'Or to pursuing the morals of the Oxventurers.
What I hope for: Mike to come back with a character who seeks to pursue their own goals more directly (see Barnaby and Silas, who both felt much stronger in this sense).
Merilwen - Merilwen was supposed to be about balance and protecting nature, but didn't always heavily engage with this point of view, even when the actions of the other Oxventurers should have absolutely led to discussions or disagreements between them. Many people commented on Andy being dickish about shooting seabirds in Legacy of Dragons, but there are other incidents, including the Wrangle in the Tangle (again), Eldritch or Die Trying (where it would have been interesting to see Merilwen's preference for nature clash with the need for the crystal) and the Extinction season which seemed to veer between being set up to be about Merilwen, then swapping to Dob-centric, then cleaning up Corazon's curse. In terms of character arc, I think there might be an element that can be teased out about her not fitting in with elf society and fitting in better with the faster-paced, more chaotic world of shorter-lived peoples, but this feels like speculation on my part more than something intended. Naturally, a character of around 100 is not going to feel as suited to a coming-of-age story as younger ones, but characters of all ages should be able to have character arcs. (Even if they might be slower in longer-lived people like elves - an example I can go to here is Galadriel, from Tolkien, who in her youth was proud and refused a pardon that would have allowed her to return to Valinor, but at the end of LOTR is humble enough to accept and go there. It took millennia for her, but it was a character arc all the same!) In Merilwen's conversation with Them, her uncertainty seemed to talk to this - a lack of clarity about where her characterisation was supposed to have gone over the last few years. I think there was a real opportunity here to explore Merilwen's relationship with morality and the difference between neutrality and passiveness, which unfortunately was missed. Goals: was supposed to be about nature but didn't push for it; arc: [speculation] seeking a non-elven community that she matched better with.
What I hope for: Ellen to have a character with more defined goals or arc, or gaps still to be filled in, rather than a static momentary sketch of personality/character that doesn't feel designed to be changed over time. Again, Lilith with her secrets/looking into the paranormal, and Edie with her goal to help people in a world in which monsters aren't going away, felt stronger as characters with goals and arcs, and I'd be happy to see more of that.
Prudence - Ambitious from the off, Prudence never actually struggled for goals - power, knowledge, magic, influence. The open-endedness of these goals once again served Prudence pretty well for carrying her through individual adventures/games and over the course of the whole canon, even if she didn't come in with clearly-defined (plot hook) goals like Corazón's curse. For the first few years, it felt that her character arc wasn't hugely significant, although there was certainly an element of found family over selfishness that played into it, but Jane also discussed (again, in the podcast) how the werebear element was really quite exciting for her as it allowed her to begin to explore the clash between werebear Lawful Good status and Prudence's usual Chaotic Evil desires. Eldritch or Die Trying explored this in a somewhat exaggerated way, with Cthulhu offering power in exchange for the destruction of the others (I suspect in Prudence's question about specifying people, she was trying to figure out whether she could kill just Liliana) which was a somewhat blatant nod to the character arc but did underline it. (Unlike the others, this also established Prudence's character arc before Them.) Goals: open-ended in a way that leaves them technically incomplete even now but which were stably useful throughout canon; arc: de-isolation and alignment shifting (in a way that should have been ripe for playing off against Liliana's) which played out well.
What I hope for: A character with perhaps some more specific or plot-hook goals as well as broader life goals. Prudence's character arc played out more subtly than Corazón's and sometimes perhaps got lost behind the louder personalities of some of the others, but I do think was well done. A less obvious way to explore or demonstrate it would have been nice.
Liliana - So. Here we go. Liliana was essentially a DMPC for the last season, but was a recurring character before that, with a stated goal of subjecting part or all of G'eth and broader goals (indicated or stated in Prism Break and the finale season generally) of academic/scholarly improvement, arcane knowledge, and the notion of making people appreciate what they have by threatening to take it from them. As a villain, she was threatening, and the layering of goals once again worked here, even with the abrupt movement to 'save G'eth' in the last season because, well, you can't rule what no longer exists. However, I am honestly confused as to what her character arc was supposed to be - whether her stated change of heart in front of Them was real, or whether that was a lie that Them somehow did not call out or challenge. Considering in Frenemy at the Gates, Liliana says that Prudence is the most like her, there was a potential here to play against Prudence's character arc of coming to trust others, even appreciate others, and facing the consequences of suffering making her realise her own flawed logic. I really do not know whether her betrayal of the guild was planned from the beginning (in which case, her talking to Them feels like it was overplayed, and Them should have challenged her on it) or whether Johnny added it because the fight against the giant was over more quickly than anticipated (compare to Dine Hard where the chef was the one person they did not stat up because they didn't expect the guild to fight him). Goals: logical, stepped, and worked for a villain; arc: ????? was there an arc? Was it fake? Was it desperation? Why did she, on 1 hitpoint, try to Power Word Kill Prudence instead of Teleporting away?
What I hope for: I don't know, with this one, really. Liliana's weird arc feels more related to the odd pacing of the last season than an underlying characterisation issue, for me, so I think it's more related to pacing/wanting Oxventure campaign 1 to close out.

Player Etiquette

...okay, this one is going to be a little bit harsh, perhaps. But the main campaign, more than either Blades in the Dark or Deadlands, really suffered from certain players having a bout of Main Character Syndrome.
I say specifically players here, because it was entirely in-character for certain characters (largely Corazón) to think of themselves as the main character and behave as such. However, even if the characters think that, is generally considered good etiquette for the players to treat each other as equals, let each other take turns in the spotlight, and have their Moments.
Good examples would be the group letting Merilwen be the main character in Peak Performance, Prudence explore her sundered relationship with Cthulhu during the Orbpocalypse Saga, or Dob showing off his acting bard chops in Dine Harder.
However, at various times, various people have overstepped. Sometimes in live shows where the audience response and excitement probably played a role (Rolling in the Deep) it's more understandable, but it also happened elsewhere. Mike got some flack for picking up the eyepatch at the end of Cursed Case Scenario and 'ruining' Corazón's moment, but even Johnny called Andy out for muscling in on Dob's subplot in Court in the Act, and Life Finds a Dob was almost uncomfortable at times. There was also something of a trend of Dob deliberately acting against the party for unclear reasons (possibly meant to be humour?) - either running away from them in Life Finds a Dob, refusing to 'share' Corazon's body in Portal Combat, or his contrary behaviour in Hunter Pressure in not wanting to fight the hunters/murderers they were facing.
I'm not sure whether this trend of contrariness fed into the unclear character arc that I mentioned above, or the other way around, or whether the two just fed into each other.
The most extreme example of this was, undoubtedly, Dob jumping in on the shoot-off between Liliana and Prudence right at the end of Portal Combat. Liliana approached Prudence in Frenemy at the Gates because they were the most alike. Prudence was the one with the first kill of the whole campaign, using Eldritch Blast, against the party's wishes and Corazón's protests specifically - how appropriate would it have been for her to get the last kill of the campaign, with Eldritch Blast, in defense of herself and her party and as retribution for Corazón? But instead, Luke inserted Dob into the standoff and Johnny played into it, even to the absurd extent of letting the skeletons use Time Stop (a 9th Level spell) just to explain why Dob's whole conversation with them could take place faster than Prudence could fire off an eldritch blast. Corazón's self-sacrifice and Merilwen's reveal of her Reincarnation spell was therefore also partially overshadowed by Dob sacrificing his magic for one more hitpoint of damage on Liliana rather than letting Prudence have her moment.
What I hope for: some of the lessons learned from other campaigns to lead the players to be better at taking turns, both in terms of people not trying to be the Main Character at inappropriate moments, players stepping up and into the leading role when it is appropriate for them to do so, and Johnny more actively monitoring the balance between the players and shutting down some of the more egregious behaviour

Morality

This... isn't actually going to be complaining about characters behaving immorally or even being evil. Prudence is honestly a great example of how to play an evil character in a way that doesn't break a party, while Corazón works as being immoral about money but moral about hurting people (at least most of the time). I've also thoroughly enjoyed some other games in which the characters have been far from moral (NADDPOD's Trinyvale series is a good example of this - the characters are scam artists, grifters and egotists, and the DM commented that "character growth doesn't have to be positive!"; they complain the entire time while saving the world).
But it's consistency that is more of a sticking point, as well as the player treatment of the moral positions of the party. It's hard to know how to treat the morals of the party when they vary from letting a town burn for being slightly annoying (Mule Be Sorry) to most of the team being ready to forgive a hag who used to eat human(oid) children (Hag Reflex). This isn't just the players either - Stop Hammer Time used the murder of children as a joke, and marked a change in tone for the treatment of NPCs and civilians as not mattering compared to the preferences or comfort of the main characters. The skeletons killing the children wasn't even some sort of monkey's paw scenario about asking for there to be no more orphans in the town, either - it was just nasty shock value, in many ways. And playing this sort of thing for humour makes it quite hard to handle some of the rest of the series as a result.
There also felt like a dissonance, at times, between the objective morality of the characters and how the players seemed to want them to be treated. Prudence never claimed to be anything other than evil, from shooting someone with eldritch blast during the Spicy Rat Caper to enjoying Hammerdahl's necromancy in Extinction - Jane even indicated that she wanted to explore shifting Prudence's alignment post-Fast and the Furriest, which can be seen as Prudence is much less interested in random acts of destruction and seems quite happy to get her kicks scaring or torturing people (Silent Knight) or watching the gruesome spectacle at the end of Knight Shift. So Jane's plans matched Prudence's behaviour - a softening of her deliberately evil acts, but still happy to let others be evil.
For the others, though, it didn't always match. Merilwen's "True Neutral" label often felt more like passively letting her party members be evil, rather than actively seeking balance, Egbert was supposed to be on the search for atonement but regularly allowed or took part in atrocities, and Dob seemed more inclined to act on what the audience or Luke thought was funny (or even deliberately seeking to be contrary) rather than following a consistent attitude to morality. His vaguely annoyed "Skeletons!" and hands on hips in return to "It's orphans, boss" was clearly played for laughs, and in Mule Be Sorry he turns on the town easily, which then makes it feel strange when in Hag Reflex he objects to letting the hag live. Dob's infatuation with Liliana and Katie Pearlhead, both of whom have killed or caused the deaths of great numbers of people, also makes it harder to take his claims to morality at all seriously. The potential moral issues of Merilwen killing the Otherberts to prevent them from taking a message to Liliana (Bad Altitude) is turned into accusing her of "war crimes", but it is absurd in the face of how many other innocent bystanders the guild had killed or caused to die in other stories (from as early as Quiet Riot, in which the paladins were annoying but killing them was honestly overboard, to as late as Squid Pro Quo where Dob seemed to forget that five people had died and then brushed off the deaths).
NPCs also got hit by this at times, from the town mayor in Mule Be Sorry (again) who put his townsfolk on spike growth just to cross it, to the chef in Dine Harder who was abruptly made a cannibal to get a fight going, to the decay of morally Good characters like Captain Shattershield turning away from the Upside Down Mistmire when in his first appearance he had been willing to fight Death itself for being on Mistmire's grounds. It's hard to take seriously moral questions about keeping the Dragon Under Mistmire in its shelter, and the accidentally-caused deaths of two paladins, when the guild has been responsible for much worse.
What I hope for: an approach to morality that does not prioritise momentary humour over consistency; evil behaviour to be acknowledged as evil and owned rather than treated as protagonist-centric; a moral balance which makes it possible to really explore moral issues and concerns rather than extreme behaviour which then makes it impossible to treat conflict seriously. Legacy of Dragons, as a standalone arc seeking Egbert's redemption, exploring the protection vs freedom of the gold dragon, and considering how to improve vs break systems, had some really great potential - but because of extreme 'rule of funny' behaviour in the past, it was impossible to really feel that it had the moral gravitas and weight that it deserved. When the skeletons go from murdering a dozen innocent children (Stop Hammer Time) to giving Merilwen a bad haircut (Mean Gulls) and this is almost treated as somehow consistent in evilness, it makes it harder to respect the characters or the expectation of moral standards.
The Good: The humour, the quick-wittedness, the variety of stories. Roleplaying moments such as Egbert and Shattershield in Legacy of Dragons, Corazón putting his old self behind him at the Curse Hole, or Merilwen saying "I'll make you" to Vex.
The Bad: Unclear character arcs, inconsistent moralities, underpowered classes but at the same time game-breakingly permissive DMing, and some Main Character Syndrome moments.
The Hope: Learning from teething issues and setting up a game system that the DM doesn't resent so much, to better enable people to balance and play off each other in a less jarring and more consistent way.

I'm a 23 year old male and since I was a kid I had to deal with toxic, abusive family. It made me very depressed. It made me wish I never existed and was dead. It made me beg to God in prayer as a child for years for help , only for it all to just continue and worsen my conditions. My end goal was to always move out. I always thought it would be more likely for me to die than move out. There was no way I thought I would live to see 18. Yet I did. Unfortunately. For a long time it just felt like a tired, cruel game. Like this life wasn't even real. I'm not. It's just to make fun of. I did not want to keep living but I did. Because of God. If I knew for a fact God wasn't real, oh you could have euthanized me ages ago. I had no interest in anything. No interest in life. So college was difficult but I finished it. Finding a job was surprisingly as difficult. And I only had about 1 offer with a salary 55k. I wanted to prepare myself to live on my own. So I needed something that was paying more than jobs I did in the past. I tried to communicate with God with a lot of my life. I'm leaving a lot out, I'm only focusing on my job journey and living on my own here. So with those specific conversations with God I told him what kind of job I want. Then I end up with only an offer of a job that I cannot see myself even doing a year at. Why? What was the point of all that? After the annoying process of finishing college. Sometimes things make me wonder if God is here actually listening and watching or if everything is just a joke because I would like to laugh too, actually. Or maybe that's not allowed. And if I'm going to be honest this type of stuff makes me wish I don't believe but I can't do that. Because I do believe. Because I know God is real. It makes me just want to be done with God. But I still have hope. Have hope that maybe for some reason He's just taking his sweet time. I don't know how much longer I have, though. I am only human. But God knows everything. Anyway here I am at 23. When I look back it's kind of reflective at 12. No things are not exactly the same. But there are a lot of similarities. I don't know what to do next. I don't have trusted people. I'm alone. I don't have family, nothing. Nobody that could help me. And usually I would disregard all that and say all you need is God and God could help you. And listen I still believe that. But right now it doesn't look like even God is there for me. And I'm hoping to be totally wrong, I am. I'm sure I am. I just don't know what to do. AND YES I know "lean not on your own understanding" it's just I'm just a human and a dumb one at that with no guidance and support so I quite literally have no idea what to do even after praying and reading the Bible that I have trouble understanding sometimes. Please, the limitations. Also please don't come here making assumptions. I've been seeking God for a while now. Nobody is perfect. I have reached out to ministries and done my own work. I've heard all the automated Christian responses. They don't work.

I believe I met my twin flame a year and a half ago He ran ghosted I chased ran it’s all been a bit tumultuous
Im not sure but I believe he may be with a karmic or a soul mate not sure but understand it’s his choice
I’ve met someone who is genuinely interested gives me time. Supports my goals we have a similair out look on life. We enjoy going out I’m similair to his ex he drives the same car as one of mine. We literally met in a coffee shop and we get on really well.
So do I go with this new guy? I should go with the new guy right? Were not toxic and he’s very sweet and loving and we actually have a lot of the same ideas and goals and understanding. He’s spiritual and he jokes about what I do but also supports it. He’s got a lot of money and I not so much but yeah I’m not too fussed on the money aspect. I don’t have a physical attraction to him but I think feelings are developing
My perceived twin normally comes back when I start seeing someone else. For a “closure talk” or something or other
I’m not sure what to do as some people say move on and some people say stick it out if I really love my twin

I'm a 23 year old male and since I was a kid I had to deal with toxic, abusive family. It made me very depressed. It made me wish I never existed and was dead. It made me beg to God in prayer as a child for years for help , only for it all to just continue and worsen my conditions.
My end goal was to always move out. I always thought it would be more likely for me to die than move out. There was no way I thought I would live to see 18. Yet I did. Unfortunately.
For a long time it just felt like a tired, cruel game. Like this life wasn't even real. I'm not. It's just to make fun of.
I did not want to keep living but I did. Because of God. If I knew for a fact God wasn't real, oh you could have euthanized me ages ago. I had no interest in anything. No interest in life. So college was difficult but I finished it. Finding a job was surprisingly as difficult. And I only had about 1 offer with a salary 55k. I wanted to prepare myself to live on my own. So I needed something that was paying more than jobs I did in the past.
I tried to communicate with God with a lot of my life. I'm leaving a lot out, I'm only focusing on my job journey and living on my own here. So with those specific conversations with God I told him what kind of job I want. Then I end up with only an offer of a job that I cannot see myself even doing a year at.
Why?
What was the point of all that?
After the annoying process of finishing college.
Sometimes things make me wonder if God is here actually listening and watching or if everything is just a joke because I would like to laugh too, actually. Or maybe that's not allowed.
And if I'm going to be honest this type of stuff makes me wish I don't believe but I can't do that. Because I do believe. Because I know God is real. It makes me just want to be done with God. But I still have hope. Have hope that maybe for some reason He's just taking his sweet time. I don't know how much longer I have, though. I am only human. But God knows everything.
Anyway here I am at 23. When I look back it's kind of reflective at 12. No things are not exactly the same. But there are a lot of similarities. I don't know what to do next. I don't have trusted people. I'm alone. I don't have family, nothing. Nobody that could help me.
And usually I would disregard all that and say all you need is God and God could help you.
And listen I still believe that. But right now it doesn't look like even God is there for me.
And I'm hoping to be totally wrong, I am. I'm sure I am.
I just don't know what to do.
AND YES I know "lean not on your own understanding" it's just I'm just a human and a dumb one at that with no guidance and support so I quite literally have no idea what to do even after praying and reading the Bible that I have trouble understanding sometimes. Please, the limitations. Also please don't come here making assumptions. I've been seeking God for a while now. Nobody is perfect. I have reached out to ministries and done my own work. I've heard all the automated Christian responses. They don't work.

hello! I'm looking for some extraordinary internet friends - people who value kindness, loyalty, honesty and respect. My passion for embracing different cultures, ideas and lifestyles knows no bounds and I'm looking for like-minded peers who are equally passionate about sharing their life stories, insights and a laugh or two.
Whether it's engaging in profound discussions about life and the universe, or just exchanging memes and jokes. That's what I'm here for; my goal is to cultivate deep, lasting friendships that are cultivated over time through genuine effort and shared experiences. I seek lasting friendships that thrive over time and shared experiences, recognizing that this requires shared time and dedication.
A little bit about myself - I'm single and may seem a little reserved at first, but I quickly settle into the right company and I open up like a book. I pride myself on being a thoughtful listener and enjoy those late night, stimulating conversations that can cover any topic imaginable.
Here is a glimpse into my world:
I am a traveler who both explores global landscapes and cultures and discovers the beautiful things in life
I'm always looking for new experiences and skills to master.
I am dedicated to achieving my fitness and nutrition goals and striving for a healthier lifestyle.
I find joy in outdoor activities such as travel, golf, surfing and tennis.
My free time is filled with traveling, reading, movies, investing, eclectic music, and capturing life moments through photography.
I am currently on a path of self-improvement and hope to connect with others who are going through a similar journey. Your life story and experiences piqued my interest. It's perfectly okay to face challenges; what's important is having the determination to rise above them and a strategy for personal growth. I work to encourage better habits and choices, cheer on friends, and provide support.
If you're looking for friends who do the same, let's get in touch! I’d love to hear about you and what fuels your passion. I will prioritize responses that show genuine interest and effort. I look forward to the possibility of forming wonderful friendships with people in the 30+ age group. Thank you for taking the time to read my message and I hope your day is as amazing as you are! 😊

Heyy (: I'm almost 22. I'm p shy and introverted but once the friendship marinates I talk alot. I'm a little anxious almost all the time so I complain alot. I'm a good listener tho and I like hearing about what's happening in my friends lives. I've existed on the internet for a long time and I have that humour. My hobbies include trying to juggle between assignments and finding time to sleep. I watch anime and stupid shows to stop myself from overthinking (it works for a while). I read manga, I pet every cat in my uni and my goal is to pet all the cats in the world. If you have a pet id love to see them. I am not artistic myself but I like watching videos of ppl paint or draw. If you show me your art id be your biggest fan (promise). I like eating more than cooking bec I can't cook. I have smol plants that I'm in love with. I occasionally read manga and manhwa but my attention span is too short to continue these days. Good reqs are always welcomed. I used to game (mostly RPGs) but not anymore. Also I'm so tired of of people putting in so less effort into conversation 😭 our interests don't have to be similar but as long as you're kind and engaging it's all good. Hmu with a joke or a random fact hehe

Hello!
27 Non-Binary and Bi-sexual looking for my first real girlfriend. I am married to my nesting partner but he will not be involved.
A little about myself:
I’m Puerto Rican. 5’3 with curly hair that is currently Blue/Green in the front. I wear glasses and have many piercings and tattoos. I am currently pregnant, so if that bothers you feel free to scroll past my post! Before my pregnancy though I had just reached my weight loss goal!
I’m a homebody! I work from home, so a lot of my time is spent at my computer. Even when I’m not working you can find me on my PC. I play mostly League of Legends, Sims4 and horror games. I’m horrendous at shooter games, but I try from time to time! I do watch anime but most of the time you can find me binging true crime and horror themed shows/movies.
When I’m not at home I’m outdoors! Hiking is another love of mine. I love to hit the local trails and get some sun time in when it isn’t deathly hot and humid (especially in my current condition haha). I also travel a fair bit! Especially to the UK. I also love animals! Dogs and cats are my life!
Ideally I am looking for someone who is good at conversation. Someone who loves to joke around and shares some of the same interests as me! If you’re in the same time zone that’s cool but if you aren’t that’s also fine! I’m open to people from all over. Honestly and communication is very big for me!
So if you read this far, thank you! I look forward to chatting if this caught your eye. ☺️

Hello everyone!
I just wanted to begin by saying thank you for your support of this organization, there are just a couple of things I noticed that I think we should all be on the same page about.
Ive seen more and more posts relating to indians specifically and drawing attention to the problem we all know exists. I wanted to be clear that this sub exists ONLY to plan the protest against these policies and NOT to create an echo chamber of immigration fueled anger. We are not against immigrants, we are pro responsible immigration. We are against overloading the capacity of our country infrastructure with people not born here because it directly contributes to a shortage of resources and therefore a higher cost of living. These are sentiments im sure we all share hence why we are all here wanting change to happen. Doesnt mean we are against immigration as a whole, just the ways and levels this government is going about it.
A lot of the posts ive seen have had to be removed not because we are too sensitive or because theres anything inherently wrong with them, but because we dont want to give anyone looking to confirm their bias about us any reason to think that we are an angry hate group, we are not. We are angry, but we dont hate the immigrants coming here who have been lied to about finding a better life in canada. Immigrants who refuse to assimilate and who come here to commit actual crimes are problematic and we are absolutely against them but the only reason they have been allowed to come here is because of the current government’s immigration policies. Again, this is a sentiment we all share.
All this being said, please keep the discussions in this sub relating purely to the planning of this protest. Any other types of post allow for people to smear our name and what we are actually about and only serves to create an echo chamber of anger. Any posts that cannot meet this criteria will be removed.
Here is a list of what not to post or comment about:
Anything targeting a specific ethnicity, culture or country.
Any posts that can be taken out of context or can be misconstrued to paint our whole movement in a certain light
Expressing anger against actual immigrants. Remember, a lot of them are victims of the lies of this government. They were told that we have space for them, that our society needs them and that life is affordable here. In reality, we only need the ones with specialized skills that cannot be found in canada, or to supplement industries that canadians cannot do so themselves, and there are not a lot of those industries/jobs. We are angry about the policies, and the specific individuals coming here to commit crimes and steal from our struggling population.
Jokes, sarcasm, personal opinions, etc. This one may seem nonsensical but it is imperative that we keep this professional and factual so nobody has any room to make up unfounded arguments against us. It also creates unnecessary “fluff” that doesnt help us proceed with our goal.
Any posts talking about or comparing us to the convoy. We have zero association with the convoy. Perhaps you were there perhaps you weren’t. But the truth is that the convoy is a very controversial topic that we have nothing to do with. Mentioning it only serves as a way to draw associations between us and them, even when there is none. We are a standalone movement with our own goals and our own ways of going about them.
Any posts talking about political parties. This is not a political movement, this is a movement against the policies in place put in by these politicians but this sub welcomes people from the left and from the right. We do not endorse any political party and it will remain this way.
Remember, we are already under heavy fire and accusations of being a “white supremacist, ultra right wing, MAGA north, convoy 2.0”. Let’s not give people a reason to think that. Our movement is about unity, peace, a better and more affordable canada for canadians and for immigrants coming here to assimilate, to work in the few sectors that we need them in, and who are proud to now call themselves a canadian. Our main goal right now is growth of our movement. The more people show up to protest, the bigger our voice. We dont want people discrediting us the moment they open the sub especially since a lot of people are already looking for reasons to do so.
Edit: I am currently discussing this further with mods, we may and probably will change some of this. Please leave suggestions and concerns relating to these points in the comments

I’ll always feel guilty for the loss of a potential family, but I desperately want this man off my mind. I don’t even know where to begin. I just have a lot to say and no one who really has the time to listen. I’ll try to stay vague but our social circles don’t really intermingle and I don’t think I know anyone on here in real life. I can barely remember specific moments or map together periods of time cohesively but I’ll try my best. I used bullet points on my notes app to try to organize the important parts. So if it reads weird or blocky, I apologize. Trying to post multiple places for multiple opinions.
I hate to admit that I think I 23/F still love my baby’s father 30/M. That may not even be true. I’m hoping it’s just the drastic hormone changes after having a baby. I don’t want to reconcile or get back together, I just want a genuine opinion from anyone that bothers to read the entire thing or advise from anyone that may have been in a similar situation. It was a very toxic and abusive relationship due to both parties. I toyed with his feelings until it was too late and he would drink and get physical. I was always accusing him of cheating or wanting to cheat because my ex had cheated. Meanwhile I was in fact projecting in a way because I was still messaging said ex. Ex and I were friends before we had dated and were together for 2 years. He had cheated on his other relationships so I should have seen it coming, but he ended up trying to cheat on me and I ended things. I was 19-20 at the time and joined tinder. Experimented a little but ended up hooking up with a guy that had a crush on me in HS. We only hooked up 2-3 times but it started getting weird and I chickened out. Then I got an apartment and a better job and started casually hooking up with the ex again. I think he had a gf at this time but I didn’t ask. At the new job is where I met BD. He started a few weeks after me. I was 20 and he was 28 at the time. We started hanging out after work to smoke. It’s not something I would normally do with just one person and he wasn’t really my type. But the hangouts got longer and more frequent. And I ended up cutting the ex off again. A couple months in, I moved in way too soon because my roommate and I didn’t get along. My ex would still message me occasionally for some reason. He definitely had a gf at this time. Some would be nudes. I didn’t encourage the behavior but I also didn’t discourage it. Bd saw the messages while we were on vacation and was understandably upset. I was upset with myself for responding. I justified it to myself by claiming I was trying to waste his time. In reality he was wasting mine and not suffering in the slightest. There couldn’t have been a worse moment for him to find the messages. The week was supposed to be a huge step in our relationship and I could see how crushed he was. If I were him I would have left me in the hotel states away and gone home that morning. The whole ride home I was sick. I couldn’t imagine how he was feeling, over something I so easily could have avoided and someone I had no interest in romantically or sexually anymore. I believe this is the first time Things got physical but as I said, the timeline is super blurry now. Regardless, if it was the first time, it should’ve been the last. No one should put up with being hit. And No one should feel that their only option is to put their hands on someone. This was when we were finally getting back to his house in our own state. He had picked up a few beers before hand, and that was generally his fuel to either argue or get violent. He had slapped me, choked me and spit in my face, all to which I gave him no reaction. I just sat on the bed silently, or tried to lock myself in the bathroom. He would walk away to smoke a cigarette and immediately come back to fight some more. He told me to pack up my shit but got more pissed off when he came inside to see me packing up my shit. I eventually got a few things packed up and made it to my grandmas’s house. We both calmed down and after a few calls and texts. he wanted to see where I was staying. I picked him up and brought him to my grandma‘s house. (Note: I should probably add that right before we got together. He got in a car accident that totally totaled his car and got a DUI. Since then I had been his ride and always joked That that’s all he kept me around for) We arrived at my grandma’s house, where she had a guestroom ready for me. He just sat on the bed with his head down and cried. He said that it looked like it was so easy for me to move on without him. Looking back, this should’ve been another red flag. All I had was a place to stay after being kicked out. He couldn’t accept that I would land on my feet without him. Most of my belongings were still at his house, and I didn’t want to burden my grandmother any further So I ended up going back with him. At this time I was still apologizing to him for what I had done and how I had made him react. One night after an argument, and a rough day in general. He walked out to grab a case of beer from the gas station and didn’t come back for hours. When I finally went out looking for him, he was at the spot that we had first kissed. There He told me I was holding him back From what he envisioned for his future. It was a lot more drawn out, less cohesive and not so nice (he had been well into his beer by then) but that was the gist of it. One of my biggest fears is being a burden, or anyone holding some secret resentment towards me. Him drinking only let me know how he truly felt and how he wanted to react. I could never put the same effort into the relationship after that. I felt like it was already over and had been over for a long time. A while later, he had seen that my ex reached out again nothing flirtatious this time, but he was still upset, understandably. He got violent again, and I locked myself in the bathroom. He took my keys and my phone and said he was going to go find him. I packed up a few things again and tried to walk over to my dad‘s house. His mission was futile and he ended up finding me walking and brought me back home. The whole night was tense and I didn’t feel safe in the morning before he woke up. I started quietly packing up my things. He woke up and immediately flew into a rage and started dumping my things out onto the ground. I called my mom to help me get out all the big things because I wanted to be all out in one trip. As I was leaving, he was screaming at my mother and I about how much a piece of shit I was, but was right back to begging for me back as soon as I was down the road. This was a reoccurring cycle for us. I’d always keep my phone and keys together in a designated spot in the house so I could get them quickly if I needed to leave. The ex no longer reached out, but we were both still suspicious of one another. Sometimes I would be gone for days sometimes weeks my belongings no longer came back because it didn’t feel like home anymore. It didn’t Feel like a safe or stable place for me. This also made him upset. Every time I would leave we would still text every day. It was an extremely toxic situation. During one period of time that i was gone He had one of our coworkers over for about a week sleeping in my bed with my cats. Throughout our entire relationship and our brakes I never met up with another person. I did leave so I didn’t have the right to be too upset. But He wasted no time having her over for an extended period of time while still begging for me to come back every day. Then I had to coax this information out of him after finding her clothes all over the house. I couldn’t get over the feeling that he had her and others lined up for when I was gone and him wanting me back meant nothing. By this time the dude I had gone to school/hooked up with had started at our job (This would seem like a cruel joke but we were in the same trade and this was one of the only decent jobs in our town.) I guess we had had a silent mutual agreement to keep out past between us because they became friends. Well, After finding out about his coworker, I told him about mine. It didn’t matter that the dates didn’t overlap. He went nutts. I don’t remember exactly how it all went down after that, but I left of course and he ended up going to this 20 year olds apartment. His roommate answered and BD demanded to know where this dude was and ends up slapping the roommate. (I have no idea why I kept going back. Typing this out, I feel so stupid. He was clearly fucking crazy and my brain was telling me to get the fuck out.) I was already suspicious of him because of how we both acted before we got together, but all of this just made it so much worse. I wanted to know why he felt the need to intimidate me into staying with him and calling it “crazy love” when he could so easily move on and leave me alone. (Why did infidelity have to be the dealbreaker and not everything else?) Bringing up my suspicions or insecurities, just made him defensive and occasionally violent. I never got any reassurance and my reasons for staying were few and far between. Then we found out I was pregnant. We found out when I was about seven weeks pregnant. The last time we had gotten into a physical fight I had been about 4 to 5 weeks pregnant. I was scared. Bd seemed happy. He said he wanted to be a family. Over the next few weeks, I was having extremely bad morning sickness I was in and out of the hospital on an IV for fluids and couldn’t leave our bedroom or bathroom. I still had to drive him to and from work which was only about 30 min round trip but I’d always have to stop on the side of the road to puke. (Note: There were five cats living in this house that I was Feeding and cleaning up after. We inherited two from the homeowner and three were ours) The house started to smell because I could no longer keep up with the cats, and this just made my morning sickness even worse. On top of this, I was having extremely bad back pain that I thought was just a symptom of pregnancy. After one of my trips to the hospital for fluids, they informed me that I had a UTI. I was about 10-11 weeks pregnant by then. I tried to tell him that I needed help with the house and that it was making me miserable. He just expressed that I would be complaining regardless. Whether it be about him spending enough time with me, helping clean, or working. This wasn’t even the worst of the treatment that I had received, but being pregnant, This was the last straw. I knew I couldn’t bring a baby into the abusive cycle that we were putting each other through. I don’t remember exactly how it happened. At this point I was looking for any reason to leave. But it happened and again I started packing up my shit. This time he barely put up a fight. He tried to dump my stuff out on the floor once, but I said if he tried to put his hands on me, I’d call the police this time. He sat in the kitchen on his phone until I was done packing. As I was carrying my belongings out to my car still weak and sick, we were screaming back-and-forth about how much we hated each other, and how I would never give him the chance to put his hands on my child. He shouted that he didn’t think the baby was even his, to which I replied, “Good, then I’ll never have to fight you in court”. That was our last face to face interaction. I filed for a civil protection order. It’s been about a year and since then, he has been claiming to his coworkers and his mother that my ex is the father. His mother doesn’t seem to believe him as she had kept in contact with me throughout my pregnancy, and since the baby’s been born. She requests a paternity test just to be sure, but I have no doubts that the baby is his. I am almost positive that he knows the baby is his too. His claims of me cheating are only his way of justifying me leaving and making it my fault. I sent her the information to reach out for a paternity test, but she hasn’t shown me any indication that he wants to be part of the baby’s life. Any time she brings up the situation to him, he gets angry with her and hangs up. I don’t know what’s going on in his life and I don’t want to. I’d only obsess over it and make myself upset if I did. I assume he’s living his dream and chasing his goals without me there to hold him back, especially with a child. Even after typing all this out and rereading and editing, I still miss him. I shouldn’t. I can’t tell if it’s the cycle calling me back or the drastic changes in hormones. I can’t even think of a reason that I should miss him. I don’t even think I miss him, just his presence or energy? It’s so hard to explain and I don’t want to feel this way. I have nightmares about trying to get away from him and out of the house but try to force myself back into the same dream just so I can see him. Is this normal? Do any other moms feel this way? Only attracted to the baby’s father even while split up? I have no sex drive when I used to be a fiend. I heard this can be a side-effect of the drastic hormone changes, but I don’t even feel an attraction anymore. Unless they’re a very specific type (My BD). I have no desire to move on or find a romantic connection. I do more harm than good and I’d rather focus on being a mom (which I’m loving aside from this issue).I know there’s no way of going back even if I wanted to. The damage has been more than done. I just want to make moving on easier and forget him. Do I just have to wait?

I am slowly realizing the extent and severity of the trauma I already knew was unbelievably abhorrent. I'm going to be vague here. For whatever reason the mods in DID are never a fan of my posts which is normally the higher trauma space I go.
I have dealt with serial assault, my ENTIRE childhood was bullying in AND out of the home, and I survived cult dynamics that involved grooming and organized abuse after consistent CSA also in and out of the home. Surely to God I can't be getting expected to get by without a caregiver and once weekly therapy? I feel so out of place because I don't want to take up resources for people like trafficking victims, but I'm starting to realize it's much closer to the type of care and support I need. I think I'm eventually going to teach people about how capitalism and cliques can function as cults just as seriously as religious kinds, especially for disabled people.
I am autistic and again structurally dissociated and I fear I'm unable to be directly fully honest/vulnerable/present with practitioners and doctors. I have extensive authority and medical trauma and my biggest goal in health safety personally is avoiding psychiatric hospitalization (I'd literally prefer jail). I'm on medications but I'm increasingly unhappy inside. I see people who have REALLY achieved unmasking and self love and it makes me realize that fully realistically? I might achieve that by the time I'm 40 or 50... And all of my abusers are still hanging out doing drugs together like nothing happened, probably joking about my downfall if I ever come up.
At this point I'm not really sure why I'm posting other than trying to understand if there are others like me. I keep feeling like people around me are always talking to me about trauma in some sort of sporadic and limited context. I can't seem to get people to understand that I don't just "feel" like I'm constantly traumatized, I have been constantly traumatized for over 25 years. Any "breaks" have simply been when I was crawling between one trauma and the next.
I'm honestly doing impressively good all things considering I guess but I feel like the walls are closing in on me. Maybe slowly, but more and more every time I check. I could keep silently pushing, but if I do at some point I'll explode.

Why does nothing ever work out in my life? It’s like my whole life is against me. Honestly, I don’t see a problem with myself because I always try my best to improve my education, confidence, and skills. Despite working hard and planning everything perfectly, nothing ever works out. It's been like this ever since I was a child. No matter how hard I try and plan for my goals, the most random, unlucky events come out of nowhere and ruin everything.
You might think I’m just a negative-minded person from this, but trust me, I’ve always tried my best to stay positive. I’ve tried to convince myself that I’m not just an unlucky loser and that it’s all in my head. I’ve done everything I could to change my mindset: going to therapy, seeking God, reading motivational quotes, finding mentors, coaches, using positive affirmations, and self-talk. But in the end, I can’t hide the harsh truth. The truth always shows itself.
No matter how hard I try, I can’t name a single goal or plan that has succeeded in the last three years. I’m so tired, devastated, desperate, and burnt out. What’s the point of trying so hard if I’m just gonna end up failing? It’s the same with my relationships. I’m nearly 23 years old female,and I’ve never dated anyone in my entire life and I’m not even ugly I’m actually considered very attractive. I’ve talked to so many guys, but none of them succeeded.I might sound crazy and self centered but I can confidently say I was never the problem but trust me I’ve tried so hard to build meaningful connections,but another unexpected unlucky event always seem to tear them apart and boom another failed talking stage 😐.And these events keep getting worser.It got so bad to the point I almost succeeded with one guy, but he randomly got hit by a car the _DAY_before our FIRST date .I almost thought I finally found love of my life this time after this tragic event I stopped trying to be positive minded and my mental health got so bad all I can think about is how unfair and cruel life is to me like what did I do to deserve this??????????????
My life is like a fcking joke it reminds of me that “sever years had luck” movie I always ask god why am I born like this and why it’s not even getting better but worser.
I’ve been to countless therapy sessions, hoping to change my mindset. Every therapist tells me to focus on the positives and let go of control. But every time I try, another setback reinforces my belief that my life is against me. It’s exhausting and demoralizing.And my mental health keep getting worser but at the same time I can’t end up like this I can’t end up killing myself I didn’t go through all these just to kill myself in the end I’m soooooo tired and drained and feeling weak please PLEASE are there any way to change my unlucky life by any chance ?????

Hello there! I’m on the lookout for some extraordinary internet pals—individuals who cherish kindness, loyalty, honesty, and respect. My passion for embracing diverse cultures, ideas, and lifestyles knows no bounds, and I’m on the lookout for like-minded companions who are just as enthusiastic about sharing their life stories, insights, and a good laugh or two.
Whether it’s engaging in profound discussions about life and the universe or simply swapping memes and jokes. I’m here for it all; my goal is to cultivate deep, lasting friendships that are nurtured over time through genuine effort and shared experiences. I’m in pursuit of enduring friendships that flourish with time and shared experiences., recognizing that this requires mutual time and dedication.
A little about myself—I’m single and might initially come off as a bit reserved, but I quickly warm up to the right company, I open up like a book. I take pride in being a thoughtful listener and savor those late-night, soul-stirring conversations that can cover any topic imaginable.
Here’s a glimpse into my world:

• I’m a culinary adventurer, both in exploring global flavors and whipping up tasty creations in my kitchen.
• I’m always on the quest for new experiences and skills to master.
• I’m committed to my fitness and nutrition objectives, striving for a healthier lifestyle.
• I find joy in outdoor pursuits like hiking, camping, and fishing.
• My leisure time is filled with travel, reading, cinema, eclectic music, capturing life’s moments through photography, and engaging in immersive gaming sessions on my PC and Switch.

Among my favorite entertainment picks are “Bob’s Burgers,” “Rick & Morty,” “Brooklyn Nine-Nine,” and the enchanting world of Studio Ghibli films. Currently, I’m navigating a path of self-improvement and would love to connect with others on a similar voyage. Your life stories and experiences intrigue me. It’s completely okay to face challenges; what’s important is having the determination to rise above them and a strategy for personal growth. I’m all about encouraging better habits and choices, cheering on friends, and being a supportive presence.
If you value authenticity and seek a friend who does the same, let’s connect! I’d love to hear about you and what ignites your passion. I’ll be prioritizing responses that demonstrate genuine interest and effort. I’m looking forward to the possibility of a beautiful friendship, ideally with those in the 30+ age range. Thank you for taking the time to read my message, and I hope your day is as amazing as you are! 😊

“Labyrinths” clocks in at a little over an hour in length, and while it isn’t notably longer than other episodes this season, those few extra minutes give this week’s story a leisurely feel, even when the action is intense. Given the subject and also the setting, this isn’t a bad thing, however; even when you’re in a hurry, rushing through a library would feel wrong.
Every item on the shelves looks like something produced by western Earth bookbinding techniques. Maybe the section our characters are walking through is the Earth section, but even so where are the clay tablets and the scrolls and the accordion bindings? Why does a Betazoid manuscript from the 24th century use the same binding techniques and have the same physical appearance as something created at a medieval European scriptorium?
I understand that all else aside, Discovery is a television show that needs to use visual language to quickly communicate concepts to its viewers, all of whom reside on Earth (or very near Earth, it’s possible astronauts aboard the ISS are watching Discovery, I don’t know). So on that level I get why the library is filled with regular old bound folios — plus, of course, it was filmed at a real library at the University of Toronto (more about that below).
But this is also Star Trek, and if there’s one thing Star Trek loves to do it’s to take everyday objects and make them look silly and futuristic — Burnham’s 23rd century copy of “Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland”, for example, had noticeably translucent binding. Sometimes those efforts can result in props and art direction that end up being a little distracting, but in this case it was the lack of them that I found to be so.
Turn it up. I love that Star Trek portrays a future where physical books are still read and published and valued, but I wanted to see a little more. Show me what a Cytherian bookshelf would look like. Maybe they store all their soup recipes as holographic text floating in transparent cubes or something.
[...]
Hy’Rell’s characterization leading up to this moment has walked such a fine line — bubbly and customer service-y and unconcerned about urgency or danger — between interesting and potentially annoying, but between the writing and the performance I actually think they nailed it. She is peculiar in a way that seems realistic for someone who’s lived their whole life as sort of a wizardy space monk, but without going to the expected stereotypes of quiet sage or uptight librarian.
Hers is a temperament we don’t see much on Discovery and as such it immediately stands out; it’s nice to meet a new character and not immediately know what character trope they’re going to fill. Stopping to correct her own joke about throwing the Breen in the dungeon — “It’s really more of an oubliette” — and being the only person who even gets that it’s a joke in the first place? Love it.
[...]
I enjoyed David Ajala as the cool, unflappable proctor of Derex’s test. Unlike Wilson Cruz’s portrayal of Jinaal earlier this season, this performance is still similar enough to the real Book that it doesn’t feel like we’re seeing an entirely different character, but an alternate take on him. This Book is calmer but also sassier in a way, not rude by any means but also not as concerned about being diplomatic in how he speaks with Burnham. I wonder how much of the proctor’s personality is the program itself, and how much is brought by the person generating it; how much of this Book is created by Michael’s perceptions of the real one?
[...]
Looks like Discovery’s last stop-off for repairs involved refilling the bridge’s propane tanks. It was like Truckasaurus back there with those huge open flames shooting around while they made their way through the Badlands! Whatever subsystem that is could maybe use a redesign.
[...]
It makes complete sense that despite her bravado, Moll wouldn’t actually be supportive of the man who made L’ak’s life miserable and, at least indirectly, led to his death. But her naked concern for the wellbeing of the Archive and the apparent destruction of Discovery is something I wasn’t expecting. Up ‘til now she’s seemed perfectly comfortable with leaving as many bodies in her wake as necessary to achieve her goals. But now? It appears that maybe Moll has started to grow a conscience. She’s still desperate, but no longer quite so indifferent. [...]"
Claire Little (TrekCore)
Link:
https://blog.trekcore.com/2024/05/star-trek-discovery-review-labyrinths/

My catfish story - trigger warning talk of suicide and abuse
Soo this still lives rent free in my mind though its been about a year since loss of contact with said catfish. The emotional and mental damage that came from my experience still haunts me and the constant questions I have constantly cross my mind. Who was he? Why? Was anything real? What was the end goal? Are my pictures floating around? Did he sell photos of my son? That last one hits right in the mom guilt...
My story starts the end of 2019 early 2020. I was a new mom struggling with PPD on-top of my already bad depression, untreated ADHD, insomnia and my then husband was no help. For example I had issues with breastfeeding and would often try to nurse for a small amount of time then supplement with formula. One night I was going down to warm up the bottle after another failed attempt of nursing that night. It had been a difficult night and sleep at this time was none existent. I heard my son crying harder after a few moments and heard my ex yelling at him to stop crying. By the time I got upstairs I walked in on him shaking him out of frustration. I took my son, got him settled and fed them attempted to have a conversation with my ex about what happened and as per usual it ended in a verbal fight. I took over all night time wake times from this point forward. I took care of the house, cooking, cleaning, paying bills etc. it was a very hard time in my life and I started having small joints or bowls after giving up breastfeeding to help control my constant anxiety and sleep. I never did this when I was alone with my son and only once he was asleep at night. My ex began to get more and more verbally abusive in the relationship and my mental health took a downward spiral. He blamed my smoking for my lake of affection towards him, my baby weight staying on and causing me not to be a 10 among many other nasty things. He began to pressure me to quite and seek help for my addiction but for free and online as I needed to be home with my son and had minimal money. (My ex hide a huge amount of debt before we got married, had me build us a brand new home to fit his life style as I was fortunate to be in a good finical standing at that time so money was tight) So I joined an app called Sober grid. And that's how I met "Michael"....
So I joined as mentioned about late 2019 earlier 2020, I had received numerous messages on the app from people reaching out to support me becoming sober. Michael was one of them. He was sweet and extremely charming. He came off extremely carrying and empathetic to my situation. As time progressed we chatted more and more and it slowly became more about our personal life's then sobriety. He would make jokes, send memes, listen to me cry over my house situation.. basically became my best friend. We stopped talking on the app and moved to what up as we live in seperate countries but only a few hours apart (he is in the states and I am in Canada) . He began to open up about his personal situation, informing me of his childhood trauma and war traumas as he had been a marine during the height of the Afghan war. I was 27 at the time and he 33. He knew I was married and had a son. He would ask questions about my son, never anything to personal or sus and about my husband. Eventually we began talking on the phone, I was enjoying the feeling of being desired, being appreciated, being dodted on even though he was hours away, he always seemed to make time for me.
Eventually as you all can assume that friendship grew feelings. So I began an emotional affair seeking all the things I was missing and to supplement my lack of self love. We talked from sun rise to sun down. Text and phone calls. The feelings grew, the texts and phone calls became more and more intense and pictures were sent. He sent me millions of photos of himself in different cloths, doing different things, and they mostly matched what he said he was doing at the time. I attempted FaceTime a few times but things just didn't work out. I didn't think much of it as I was addicted to the feeling I was feeling and my mental health was a mess...
Things between my wx husband and I deterated. I was primary caregiver and 9months after having my son I had to return to work so we wouldn't lose our home and could afford food. Mat leave in Canada is 12-18months.. I opted 12 and returned early. At this point my mental health went further down the gutter, my ex and I were seperation and getting back together on repeat and constantly fighting. I am so glad my son will have no memories of this time due to being so young. My choices became worse and judgement continued to be clouded by this delusion that me and "Michael" would be together as he promised. In sept 2020 I began having suicidal ideation a believing I was a horrible human and mom and absolutely useless. I spent sometime in therapy and got medication but I didn't continued the treatments as in my mind once I get to make a plan and remove my marriage I can be with this person who makes me feel like a queen and talks to highly of my son.
I did send him a few photos of my son solo and some of me and him. Never anything exposing just mostly of us playing and what we were up to. He always spoke so kindly of my son, told me he wanted to be a bonus dad and take care of us.
Like I said, I really just ran past those flags..
In Jan 2021 everything in my life came to a crashing end. I ended up informing my ex of "Michael" and explained that this man was going to get himself killed because of me. At the time "Michael" had convinced me that he was going to rejoin the marines and remove himself from this situation n find peace in death as he couldn't live without me and couldn't commit suicide.. Due to the poor state my mental health came to a crashing point in this moment. My ex said some harsh things (deservingly so I was an idiot at this time - though he was abusive an ass what I did was wrong) and "Michael" walked away... I thought... To get himself killed because of me.
I ended up in a spiral and attempting suicide believing that was the only way out. Michael began calling and texting me off 2 numbers (his work and personal cell) to tell me he made a mistake and he wanted to stay in my life. I ended up on a form and in inpatient mental health unit for treatment. I was there for 4 days.
Upon discharge I attempted marriage counseling and personal counseling but things between myself and ex never improved only worsened. And "Michael" had gotten in contact with me and sweet talked his way back into my life..
I left my husband a few weeks later in 2021..
I fully committed to "Michael" and hung off his every word, photo and phone call. He spoke to my friends, my son, and sent me surprise flowers and pizza all the time. Though hours away always tried to look out for me...
This is when I started to become more aware of the flags. Through 2021 and the beginning of 2022 we continued down our path of on and off relationship, him always leaving and coming back. He said he was afraid of me leaving him over his PTSD and wounds from war. That's what he stated then.. the facetiming never happened, he always face timed when I was busy or never answered mine. I became aware of the toxicity that had began happening, him leaving saying he was not good enough for me and my son, me fighting, him coming back and promising me things and then repeat. One time he told me he had obtained a job in my area and was moving here. He was apparently here, completed some training and then the night we were to meet he chickened out and pulled one of his I'm not good enough, I'm a horrible person act as he always did. He would get jealous easy, he had found an inactive dating profile once from a period of time we were not talking and lost his mind. He called me "mo" as he always wanted more of me.
I could provide so many stories and examples of these fights, toxic behavior, red flags I ran past etc.
Then one day he told me he wasn't who he said he was, his storyline was true but the person was not. I asked him to explain and he covered it up with a war PTSD storey, foster home story or homeless teenage story that would distract me to thinking he ment personality wise and decency wise not looks.
I was very on my toes with him at this point but trusted him...why I do not know...
This continued till the end of 2022 when I bought a home and started to live life and not wait for him to join me. We slowly driftes apart as clearly after basically 2 years of this I was at a point where he needed to meet me or leave me.. in early 2023 all contact stopped. Not blocked but I had started treatment a few months earlier, got medicated and mentally stable.. I noticed the red flags and began calling him on them. Asking him about his pipe fitting at "Nicor" and how they let him leave to go to Ukraine. He was trying to convince me he had went to Ukraine to stand with them, text me as if he was there in war fighting to get back to me. Purposing to me over the phone, telling me he placed me as his beneficiary, giving me a marine number that would identify him and allow me access to his fund if something happened.
I did some digging as things just didn't add up. At this point I asked more questions and became more stand off.
This man never told me who he was, why, or that he was even a catfish.
He began to distance himself from me and I to him.
Later 2023 I found out about face ID websites and uploaded one of the images I still had of him just put of curiousity. He had never had any social media - told me he didn't like it but I'm assuming my guliable ass just fell for a lie there.
Well.... He was not in fact the person he sent me all those photos of.. I'm genuinely concerned how he got all these photos of this person he had so many different ones.. the person in those photos was an Italian soccer player..I attempted to confront him up n both numbers but have never recieved an answer. Just silence... He's never blocked me either and clearly still has the number as the person never responds.
I have come a very far way from who I was when I met this man. I have come even further since becoming more active in my mental health care. I am at the most stable I have ever been, the happiest I have ever been, and overall just happy with who I have grown into. I have done some stupid shit and this was probably the number one thing (though it did help me leave a horrific situation I should of handled it way better).
Don't be me.. ask the questions, do the face times and ask for all the proof. Don't be left haunted by a bad choice and if this person, who you have no idea what they look like, could be around you or your son. If your in an abusive relationship, find a safe way out and take your time to heal.
I hope someone who reads this avoids being dragged through it like I did and asks all the smart questions..
Remember it's not capture the flag ppl