How to shoot up nucynta

So, I'll try to make this as short as I can. I mostly just need to vent and get everything off my chest.
Edit: it has been brought to my attention that it may seem like I am asking for advice on medications and such. I just want to be clear that I am in NO way asking for any help or anything to do with getting suggestions on types of medication or receiving them or anything like that! I just wanted to vent and explain everything I have been on and gone through and to see if I am right for being upset with the way my last doctor dismissed me or if I am completely 100% at fault for being treated like I am by them.
I have been an actual chronic pain patient for a little over 5 years. I had been dealing with on and off moderate-severe lower back pain for years, due to trying to lift something too heavy and then breaking my tailbone a few years later. The pain fluctuated between a 4 and a 9 for years but I didn't start struggling 24/7 with the pain until I became pregnant. Then it became unbearable.
After I had my son, they prescribed me Percocet since I had to have an episiotomy. It was like the sun fucking came out. For the first time in years I was able to get some relief for my back! So, I went to my PCP and asked what he could do to help. He said he was willing to prescribe me 5 mg Percocets once a day until I could get on my husband's insurance in a few months, then he would refer me to a pain management doctor.
Fast forward to new pain management doctor. He seems nice, though I have to wait over an hour every single time I have an appointment and I had to sign an insanely extreme contract wherein I am not allowed to even drink alcohol in any amount. I signed it thinking that he couldn't possibly enforce the no alcohol thing. Boy was I wrong bc he decided to discharge me after my very first drug test. I know it had to be the beer I had the night before bc I was definitely doing what I was supposed to with my meds he prescribed. They never would give me a clear answer on why he dismissed me, just that I "failed the drug test" but wouldn't tell me how I failed, then sent me a $1,000 bill for said drug test.
So, I started seeing a new PM doctor my friend recommended to me. He didn't make me sign an insane contract, just a basic one about using the same pharmacy and taking my meds the way I'm supposed to, no other drugs, stuff like that. He didn't care about THC or alcohol and I was 100% upfront with him about everything all the time. At the first appointment he told me to let him know if my tolerance went up. I didn't have to ask for a change for a while, over a year, but when I did, it was after the CDC guidelines changed about only prescribing 90 pills a month. So, instead of increasing my Percocet like I was hoping they would do, they put me on an ER medication, morphine 15 mg once a day with 10 mg percocet twice a day, which is what I was on before my pain started getting worse. The morphine ER did nothing so they switched me to another kind, the Fentanyl patch, I think it was 12.5 mcg every 3 days. It was actually pretty amazing but for some reason they told me I tested negative for it one time, even though they always checked me to make sure I was wearing it at each appointment. Soooo they switched me to Nucynta. It SORT of helped, barely, but I would often find almost entirely undissolved pills in the toilet (so sorry for being graphic, just didn't know how to sugarcoat it lol) which explained why I usually didn't feel shit from it. After that, I was done with ER medications so I asked to be taken off of all ER meds and to just be given 3 10mg percocets a day. They agreed and I did okay on just those for almost a year. I still struggled but it was better than nothing and I was afraid of asking for more in case they thought I was abusing my medication. Then my pain got to the point where it was an 8 every single day. My meds would bring it down to a bearable level, but I was still stuck in bed most of the time and if I wanted to do ANYTHING at all outside of my normal routine, I knew I would be paying for it for days after. After almost a year, I couldn't take it anymore and asked to be put back on the morphine since 1) the Nucynta was crap, 2) they refused to try the patch again, 3) I didn't want my oxycodone tolerance to go up so I didn't want oxycodone ER, and 4) they won't prescribe any other ER medications. So, they finally agreed to give me 15 mg ER morphine twice a day with my three Percocets a day. It still pretty much did nothing but at least I was able to get out and do minor things SOMETIMES but I was still mostly stuck in the bed or on the couch for at least half the day.
Fast forward to a few months ago. I was finally sick of being stuck in the bed all of the time, and finally tired of being afraid to put my foot down. I was running out of meds a few days early, every month, and I was TELLING them this every single time. I told them constantly that my pain was worse and that I thought maybe I needed a higher dosage to continue to function. They kept refusing but finally I got them to order another MRI at least. I was supposed to find out the results at my next appointment.
Instead, at the next appointment, the doctor immediately comes in and tells me he is dismissing me as a patient bc my drug tests have been coming back wrong. I told him, yes, I told you every single time I was out early and you never told me it was an issue and you never did anything to help me AND if you look and see when they don't look right, I told you guys I was in a lot of pain and that my meds weren't helping as much as they used to. This was the first time I had even SEEN my actual doctor face to face in over a year. After I stopped getting injections that didn't work and cost too much, he always sent in his PA instead. They never gave me any warning that they were thinking about dismissing me. I looked at the written MRI results and it showed obvious worsening of my issues so I'm absolutely appalled that they would dismiss me without even looking at the results or talking to me or anything. He fucking gave me a list of drug rehab centers and sent me off with only my Percocets with instructions to wean myself off and find a rehab and that my anxiety was probably a big cause of my pain. I was openly crying bc I was so scared about my possible future without pain meds so yeah, I was a BIT freakin anxious right then! Gahhh. I wanted to slap him right there.
So, I call another pain doctor to try to see if I can find someone new. They call me back and tell me they are willing to see me but will not prescribe me any medication at all. Am I wrong for thinking that is a super shitty move to make when they've never even met me and haven't even heard what happened from my side? I'm willing to try non-medication options if they would actually work but, I have done physical therapy and have had different types of injections 3 times and NONE of it has done a thing to help me. Medication is the only thing that gives me any semblance of relief.
So now I don't know what to do. I totally understand that doctors are paranoid about prescribing opioids, with doctors getting in trouble left and right, but, am I wrong for being angry and confused at my situation? Every time I saw my pain doctor of 4 years, they would give me a piece of paper with the visit summary and it would ALWAYS say something about there being no signs that any abuse of my medications was going on. So I was COMPLETELY caught off guard when they kicked me out just like that, especially since I ALWAYS told them when I ran out early and why.
I feel so discouraged and frustrated and I'm going to run out of my "weaning" prescription this week. Kratom works somewhat but makes me feel really sick half the day for some reason, no matter how much I take. I get dizzy and nauseous and it's almost not worth it sometimes but I get desperate when I'm in a lot of pain and need to take care of my son or the house. I have sacroiliitis, osteoarthritis, stenosis causing sciatica and all manner of shooting pains, and a herniation in my L5-S1 from the tailbone injury.
I'm so afraid I won't be able to find a doctor to help me now that my previous doc has apparently labeled me an addict. I just can't believe I was his patient for 4 years and never showed any signs of a problem and then all of a sudden he just kicks me out. I don't get it. Sigh.
Thanks for reading if you actually made it this far and thanks for letting me vent.

I was in the ER for a bad reoccurring allergic reactions. It’s not one of my usual two hospitals. I’m split between the two major hospitals(technically three because I exhausted resources locally) because one refuses to treat one of my biggest issues which causes frequent anaphylaxis. My main hospital and healthcare system is where I see pain management. That’s where I had my spinal fusion(almost a year ago) and where all but Immunology and Hematology Oncology that does my bone marrow biopsies. They also manage most of my care including my Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome(genetic connective tissue disorder). I’ve been working with pain management for almost five years now(26 is a great age for that 🙄). The year before my fusion and for about 2-3 months after I was on some heavy duty pain meds. I was on the Butrans patch which is Suboxone, Nucynta ER, and 2-4 Immediate Release Nucynta. After my surgery and knowing that I was right about how bad my cervical spine was I started pushing for more testing and other non opioid options. I had SI joint injections in October(HOLY HELL that hurt) which didn’t even give me long term relief. I’m scheduled for a radio frequency nerve ablation in my SI joints with the possible placement of a spinal cord stimulator in March.
My point in telling all of that is that my pain was severe and debilitating at 18 and I’m 31. The surgery didn’t help with the pain which we knew was a possibility. My pain management doctor said that’s not why I had it, I had it because there was spinal cord dysfunction. I’m “allergic” to opioids. With my immune system disorder I can have random reactions. I’ve reacted to every single regular opioid(which makes spinal fusion super fun). I’m not always going to react but the risk is high enough that it’s listed as an allergy and not something I can take at home. I’ve been okay with partial opioids like Butrans and Nucynta(Nucynta has been the best, hands down). I don’t want to run out of options in 5+ years. I’m currently on just the Nucynta ER and IR Nucynta. I use Tizanidine from time to time, CBD, and heat. I prefer to make adjustments and/or increases as low and slow as possible because I know that you will develop a tolerance.
Now to the false positive for Methadone. I’m not on it nor have I ever been. I’ve smoked weed on and off since I was 14(for complex PTSD). I will actually smoke more than CBD if I have severe pain and/or nausea. Pain Management is also well aware of that. If I lived in a medical marijuana state I’m quite certain that they would encourage it(they do with CBD). It’s important information and lying to a doctor makes very little sense. If they want or need to know they’ll find out eventually. I also get Marinol which is the “THC pill” ie pharmacy made THC. I’m also allergic to every anti-emetic aside from Zofran. Thankfully the ER nurse just asked me about the Methadone and I think the doctor realized that it was a false positive. I explained that I know that both Suboxone and Methadone are now being used for chronic pain I was not on it nor have I ever been. Don’t quote me on this but I’m pretty sure it would make my Nucynta useless. It’s a partial opioid so I’m not sure. I also told them that they could recheck it but they didn’t seem to see a need to do so.
I have no idea why it showed up. I did read that Benadryl can cause a false positive. I was getting IV Benadryl quite often because anaphylaxis. I’m going to shoot a message to pain management just to let them know. I’m not worried about them thinking that I am on Methadone. I am one of the few patients who doesn’t get tested. My doctor also called me an ideal pain management patient. If I need heavier meds I ween off of them like I’m supposed to(which is apparently a problem). I am willing to try anything that he thinks might help me because he’s a damn good doctor and I trust him.
I know I wrote a lot. It’s honestly because I feel like I have to prove that I’m really not taking Methadone.