So last night I found the courage to ask this girl out that works as a security guard at Walmart. I recognized her from high school because she looked different back then. Short story short this is how it went:
I said "hey!" and waved to her to come over to where I was. She comes over and I fist bump her and say hi my name is A. And she fists bump me back and says "my name is B". And then I asked, "Did you go to *this high school?" She said yeah and I said oh okay. And then I said "I just wanted to ask if you'd wanna go on a date sometime?" And then she says "oh no thank you." And I just say oh its okay. Thank you. and she walks away and I hope in my car and drive off all while my face is red from the embarrassment. And then when I got home I was thinking about the whole situation and I realized how i set myself for sabotage lmaoo. I realized that maybe I should've emphasized on when I asked her if she went to that high school. But in the moment my brain couldn't think correctly and I was just so nervous but I see now how that situation would've made her feel uncomfortable. Basically I want to apologize to her for putting her into that situation and tell her that I also go to the same high school and thats where I recognized her. Should I or should i not? All answers welcome. Also Im a girl. (F19) and I think she's 21 (im not sure tho)

🤐🤐🤐 which hampers people's God given right to their Freedom of Expression, freedom of speech. It is Google YouTube auto deleting of viewers' comments with spam bots. It's not the creators that's responsible for this atrocity. It's Google YouTube's dictator-esc, tropes, unbeknownst to the creatorsbstealthily impose these auto delete bots in the comments section of YouTube videos of 'Tubers. But here's where I call to the stand my star witness, B.S. Shenanigan. These lil' anecdotal quirks these past few years like removal of the "Dislike" button, TikTok-esc "shorts" and as of three years ago (2019) the excessive auto deletions of YouTube viewers' comments of the comments section. Mind you upon the request of the creators themselves. You all know the whole spew, "Like, subscribe, hit the bell icon (although through IOS Android browsers no such icon is provided) and leave a message in comments section below," at start, middle, or end of videos. So common sense indicates it makes no sense whatsoever that the creators themselves will just delete comments that they don't like, or agree with. As they respect their viewers' 1st Amendment Right. Furthermore, this will only alienate their subscribers, thereafter losing mass subscribed viewers to their channel, losing their entire subscriber fan base. For them this is the last thing that they would want to do, because for most of those creators their channel is their bread and butter, their ends meet. So logically speaking they wouldn't want to do ANYTHING to jeopardize their bottom line, of both the seasoned vets BIG creators to the newbie smaller start up creators. So that said by object of elimination it's Google doing all they can passive aggressively to try to sabotage these YouTube creators as a scheme to run them all from the platform. Hmmm🤔.. come to think of it, it seems to me like this is a scheme coming from the mind of an incompetent female CEO one Susan Wojcicki to me. Running Google YouTube proverbially into ground oblivion, not to be "sexist." Whilst making way for BIG NAME Broadcast Companies to utilize the YouTube platform, relegating it into an overall post broadcast production platform, or content streaming platform provided to Big Broadcast.
What are your thoughts on this theorem? Could I possibly be right with my synopsis? Comment below your input. But keep in respectable everyone...

I'll try to make this brief, but I'm wondering if I'm making a big deal out something that really shouldn't be a big deal or if I am justified in being a little upset. Also, if the other guy is in the wrong, is there any reason for me to say something to him? The other guy's name will be "Bob" -- but that's not his real name, of course.
This past weekend I picked up a unique bottle (a store pick Jack Daniels' Rye) at the request of Bob -- a Facebook acquaintance who lives a couple hours away. I've picked up a few bottles for him before, and this request was not out of the blue. I didn't mind doing it.
My 24 year old son and his new wife were visiting with us for the weekend and would be passing through Bob's town on their way back to their apartment, so I asked my son if he would mind dropping it off on their way through Bob's town. No problem.
My son and I drove 10 minutes to the liquor store and back home, with no other objectives on the trip. I thought there might be a crowd waiting for the bottle, so I made the decision myself to go on the mission at that time rather than wait until later when we might have been out running other errands. I made the purchase and sent Bob a picture of the receipt. He sent me a Venmo that was a little short of the amount that I paid. The total cost was a $76.26 and he sent me $76. I was a little miffed.
On Sunday when my son and daughter-in-law were traveling home Bob coordinated a meet-up location that was right along their route through his town (how thoughtful of him), and they met up and transferred the bottle. There were no problems. That's the end of the story.
There are two reasons I am a little upset with Bob:

1. He reimbursed me less than what I spent on the bottle he asked me to buy for him. I lost money.
2. I though he should have given my son a couple of samples or a few dollars for his trouble.

I did not do the favor with the intention of making a profit... but I sure didn't plan to lose money in my bourbon account as a result of the deal, either! The amount of money that he was short on his payment isn't really the point. I can survive the $0.26 loss. We won't have to cancel the cable. But I really don't think I should have to take a loss at all.
Case in point: When my sister recently picked up a bottle for me in another state I rounded up to the next $5 when I paid her for the bottle... and that was my sister! This is my typical approach when someone does this type of favor for me.
I also thought it would have been a nice opportunity for him to be a cool adult to a younger guy who has a bourbon interest and give my son a couple of samples of some bottles from his collection. Bob knew that it would be my son dropping off the bottle. Instead he did nothing except to say "thanks" and also make sure my son didn't have to drive too far out of his way to drop off the bottle.
Is it too petty of me to be a little upset at all of this? If not, is it worth saying anything to Bob? He's not really a friend. He's just a guy on Facebook. (He IS the moderator of a sizeable statewide bourbon-interest group, for whatever that's worth.)
Thoughts?
EDITS: clean-up and correcting typos

Hello, I am an exempt salary employee in colorado. I am required to work 45 hours a week, scheduled for 5 10-hour days with a 1 hour lunch.
My company implemented “health and wellness days” which we were told had to be requested 2 weeks in advance and were for doctors appointments.
Today i found out that every time i have left early or called out due to weather or sickness they used the health and wellness days.
This wouldnt be a problem but i have been using the health and wellness days to schedule appointments so now they are taking my sick time out of my vacation time.
I was able to get the policy which states that if we are out with a personal illness for 3 days or more we would have to contact HR for a short term disability.
My issue is that all of the time im sick i go into work and try to make it through the day but am either late or leave early and now i have no more health and wellness time due to scheduling appointments. Any time that i have submitted for sick time i have specifically said sick time and anytime ive had an appointment request i have asked for a health and wellness day and have never been corrected.
Its a huge issue in my company as there are multiple people who dont know the policy/wont answer the questions.
I have vacations planned for my vacation time what if i am sick again i just have to power through the day? I wouldnt have used the days for appointments if i had known i only get 5 sick days a year under the same name.
Can someone help me understand how our sick time is less than the state requirement of 48 hours?

Hi everyone. I'm a 20yo Christian guy. I'm thinking about trying suicide again on my birthday, since I tried it twice years ago.
I was diagnosed with depression in 2020, but I was feeling the symptoms since years ago. I'll resume my situation...
I've always been Christian since young, I was a really happy kidder and smart child (that's what people says) but everything changed as I was reaching adolescence. I was bad treated several times in my childhood by people at school and also from my family, they called me fat, megamind, whale, and they even called me Satan. School was a nightmare, bcs it was every single day ppl giving me names and treating me poorly. So I just started to hide myself in the principals office so nobody would bully me, and it worked.
I'm a super ugly guy, a horrendous and filthy face and body. Short and unproportional, like an anomaly. And no talent, like zero potential for anything. I feel like God was cruel to me, He gave me that trash body and no talent to compensate. I feel like He wanna use me as an example, but I don't want this. I don't wanna be the 'super ugly guy testimony', it's shameful.
There's not a single day I don't hate my appearance, and that's been taking me to dark places and demonic thoughts. I used to harm myself and I'm considerating going back to it, sometimes I even wanna set myself on fire to destroy this body. I wish I didn't exist, I'm a failure. When I was a kid I was hopeful, I thought I'd grow and become a tall handsome man, it didn't happen. I was wondering taking singing lessons bcs I love music and sometimes I think of myself singing, but my voice is horrendous and I don't have the talent.
All my dreams were crushed in front of me. I don't know what to do, I don't wanna pray the same thing forever and see no results... I prayed to be tall, to look good, to find my talents and it never happened. I know I'm a disgraceful sinner and have this addiction that I can't get release from, but I still a human being that wanna feel loved for God. And that's the last thing I've been feeling nowadays... sometimes I feel like I'm starting to hate God, and I don't want that because I'm afraid of God trying to harm me. I know He doesn't own me anything, but still hurts. I barely read the Bible cause I don't feel it's gonna help, I only pray at the end of the night but I got to church.
Please, what should I do? I'm sorry for breaking the harmony of this sub but I'm trying everything at this point.

Guys, if you like a good story please read. I need help.
I’ll start with some back story. So I’m 24(m); all throughout my younger stages, I’ve never been the type of guy to just be good with girls. All throughout school I’ve never had a girlfriend and have been rejected numerous times. I was kind of a nerdy kid but just didn’t really know how to talk to girls. Anyways, fast forward to today I’m currently on my 6th relationship of 2 years. All the girls I’ve dated aren’t that good looking. Some more than others but a little chubby and what not… you get the picture.
This girl I’m dating lives about two hours from me and we met online. We’d see each other maybe a couple times a month but we’d stay at each others houses for like 2-3 days at a time. She’s 23. Things are going pretty good between her and I. She is absolutely crazy in love with me and she honestly would do anything for me. I honestly do love her back but not to that extent and she’s so sweet and nurturing and innocent. She’s also a bit overweight and still immature in some ways. I’ve tried talking her out of her habits and that only gets so far I feel.
Given my troubling and frustrating time growing up with no female attention I’ve come across a difficult situation now. About a month ago at my job a very attractive woman drove through my job (I’m a toll collector). We exchange the cash and right before she drove off, she handed me a small pink piece of paper with her name and phone number. We glanced and smiled at each other as she drove off.
Of course I texted her because she was very attractive and I just wanted to see what would happen. This woman is 35 years old with an 8 year old daughter. She’s honestly very beautiful and has almost damn near perfect physical features. Short blonde mom not, not overweight but not skinny either. She makes six figures with her job, her family is generationally wealthy, she owns her own house and vehicle. I mean holy shit I hit the lottery. But I told this woman that im in a relationship with a girl and that unfortunately I can’t be going out to drinks with her. We stopped talking for about a week after that.
A week later she texted me and one thing leads to another, she was fine with me being with somebody and she just wanted to go out for drinks. In my mind I’m like holy shit I just struck gold with a milf. Quite literally something straight out of a porn video.
This woman and I have been texting daily for about a month now. She even has been buying me drinks every day at my work when she drives through. She’s just so mature and has goals and everything you could want in a woman. In my head i want to think what she sees in me but I don’t want to ruin it either.
Is this an opportunity of a lifetime? What do I do? If I break up with my current girlfriend, she’ll be so crushed. In her eyes everything is going perfect. I’ll feel ashamed either way.

Hi there! 👋
I'm Gonçalo "Eugini" Oliveira, a passionate Dungeon Master who brings cinematic storytelling to every session, and I'm currently trying to achieve the most immersive TTRPG experience out there – and I would love your help in doing it!

A bit about Eugini – the Dungeon Master:

🎬 F*ilm & TV Professional: *Years of working as a Producer and Writer in the entertainment industry have given me a passion for creating worlds and making them a reality. Check out my credits and see if you (unknowingly) might've seen my work before!
📚 B*it of a Bookworm: *My love for D&D started with my love for books! My first book was The Little Prince, and that book is to this day my first love. You might catch this passion during sessions, where my style tends to focus on the narrative side of things, in both NPCs, storylines, descriptions – you name it!
😂 G*oofball: *I'm a sucker for a laugh. I value serious topics as well as great dramatic character arcs. However, it's my outgoing and carefree charisma that allows me to run NPCs as highly nuanced performances, usually doing voices and acting for the sake of story. When I perform during a session, I try to live each character as they are – serious or not!

About the Campaign:

Step into Barovia, a land ensnared by a vampiric curse. In The Mists of Fate: Strahd’s Legacy, your actions and decisions will shape the narrative in a player-driven saga full of deep storytelling and rich role-play. This Curse of Strahd campaign promises an immersive and cinematic experience like never before.
By taking advantage of Foundry VTT and other tools, such as AI-modules for highly personalized character creation, and creating a short-animated film featuring your characters after each section of the story, I aim to make your character feel real and ready for its own show! 🎥

Why Join Us?

🎬 C*inematic Storytelling: *Experience D&D like a blockbuster movie where immersion is king. State-of-the-art automation and cinematics paired with Foundry VTT will make the Theatre of the Mind feel alive on your screen every session.
🚀 E*xperience Innovation: *Never before seen use of AI for TTRPG will allow you to see your character come alive. After each chapter of the campaign, an animated short-film will let you relive your actions and their impact on the story.
🤝 C*ollaborative Gameplay: *Your choices will significantly impact the story. The way you make friends or foes ultimately decides your fate in this dreary land of shadows.
🌈 W*elcoming Environment: *Ideal for both newcomers and seasoned players. Our goal is to give you the most fun experience possible!
If you're ready to defy fate and venture into the unknown, join us!
Campaign settings in link below!
🔗 Sign Up Here
Working to make your dreams come alive!
Best, Eugini

So I'm now over a year removed from college where I studied sustainable energy management (essentially everything to do with managing sustainable energy projects, from energy markets to the financial aspects of the project itself such as NPV and cost-benefit analysis). I enjoyed the classes I took and am definitely passionate about sustainable energy, but the process of finding a job since I graduated has made me want to never enter the corporate world
I have gotten nothing but disgusting and unprofessional behavior from hiring managers and recruiters. Had one recruiter reach out for a job I had applied to a few months back and explained to me the responsibilities, what the company does, the pay, what to expect when hired, and then asked when I'd be available for an interview. The job was utterly perfect and was exactly what I wanted to do. Never heard back from them, and when I reached out via email to him he entirely ignored it and never responded.
I also had an interview for a part-time role at a local college that was also right up my alley and involved managing a sustainable energy outreach program. Went through 3 interviews with this old lady who seemed to not know anything about sustainable energy and thought my name was THOMAS the entire time even though she had my resume. She wanted me to come into the school after the 2nd interview to show me what it was like and introduce me to the rest of the staff. Sounds like she wanted to hire me, right? NOPE, I NEVER HEARD BACK.
Apologies for the rant, but long story short I am absolutely disgusted with this whole process and honestly just wanna give up entirely and pursue something else. I'm tired of scouring websites for jobs, I'm tired of having to change my cover letter to basically beg for mediocre pay, and I'm tired of the disgusting behavior that these people are able to get away with when we candidates are expected to bend over backward for them.
Any advice?

I was trying to sleep one random night when I suddenly got hit with a strange memory. The memory in question being that of this weird TV-show that I used to watch as a child.
Every episode started off with a spinning wheel. This wheel would land on one of several anthropomorphic animal characters. The character that was chosen would proceed to ride through an obstacle course whilst riding a bike or something similar.
Every episode was especially short. I believe it was cgi animated and none of the show’s characters ever talked. Pink was used a lot in this show.
This memory of mine comes from my childhood. I can’t remember the exact time I watched it, but I probably did so around 2008-2013. I definitely watched it in Norway, so it probably aired on either a large Norwegian TV-network like NRK or TV2. If not, I probably watched it on Disney Channel, Playhouse or XD.
I used to like this show a lot. It seems to me as though it just vanished from time and space one day. I can’t find nor remember the name of it, I can’t find a single record of it and I doubt anyone would know what I was talking about if I told them about this. All that remains is this random memory that popped into my head.

Hi ! I'm looking desperatly for a french version of a movie called Kelly dream club. It came out in 2002 as a short barbie side serie. I found it in english but i watched it in french and i wish to get it back in hands ahaha. I dont know the name in french. It must be something like "le club des rêves de Kelly" but i dont find anything anywhere. That's very frustrating because i found the exact thing i was looking for and now i just can't manage to have it in french. If you have a link or something leading me to a french version (i can even buy it if needed) you'll save me :)

This is my first reddit post and honestly it's a lot so please bear with me. I'm still trying to figure out how to process everything and make sense of it all. I guess we will start at the very beginning. My boyfriend,( we will call him michael) and I just passed 6 months together. Honestly, hes been great. We clicked pretty fast and have a great bond. I feel safe and comfortable around him and can communicate in a way ive never been able to before. It just kinda works. I definitely fell hard and fast for him and from what I could gather, the feeling was mutual. We had met on tinder in early October and went on our first date in November. We made it official shortly after our first date.
After we started dating, he had briefly mentioned that he had a friend who had a bit of a crush on him. I told him I didn't mind and I trusted him. As long as he kept things respectful to me, it didn't matter. He then explained that her crush was a bit obsessive and he actually wanted to push her out of his life and needed advice. Apparently, this friend, (we will call her beth) was pregnant and wanted Michael to be her baby's God Father. He said that she would follow him and got jealous when he was with other girls. I found this kind of odd but he swore they were just friends, so I told him the best way to let her down gently and let him do his thing. About two weeks later, he told me she was out of the picture. I didn't really care either way but the communication was cool.
Anyways, I pretty quickly forgot about all of that because it was irrelevant and I wanted to focus on our relationship. One night when we were hanging out, he got a snapchat notification. He turned away from me to respond to it but I didn't think much of it, just asked who that was. He said it was just a friend (we will call this one Jen) and they were catching up. I had never heard of her before but I didn't care, I just said cool and dropped it. Just like before, I quickly forgot about that conversation because again,it was irrelevant and I had better things to think about. I trusted him so why should I care who he talks to? He is his own person after all and I understand the importance of friendships.
Fast forward about another two weeks later, him and I had our first argument. I dont remember what it was about. Most likely something small and pointless because I had a stressful day at work but nothing too serious. We did not talk much that day. Later that night, I apologized and we talked it over. Everything was fine. He then told me that earlier in the day, an old friend that he had removed off social media readded him and messaged him. We will call her Molly. Apparently she had just noticed she was removed and was upset and wanted to know why. He told me that he sent her a message explaining that he didn't see her in his life long term and doesn't feel the need to keep someone around who won't be around forever so he didn't want to be friends anymore. He then removed her again. At this point I thought the way he acted was odd. I had never heard of molly before, he waited until he had already removed her before telling me about the conversation, she only came into the picture when we had our first argument and it got me thinking about the other girls who were just friends. I definitely started to over think a bit and was more than curious about who these people were and what their relationship to him was. But he swore they were all just friends. So I continued to believe him.
We went a long period of time without anything coming up so once again I forgot about it and moved on with my life. Him and I were doing great. We were young dumb and in love. I felt truly happy, something I hadn't experienced in a long time. I felt like I genuinely found someone who was right for me and I didn't need to second guess whether or not he was gonna cheat on me. He occasionally would ask to see my phone but I didn't have anything to hide so I allowed him. I had set a boundary with him that if he ever felt concerned or needed reassurance, he needed to bring it up to me first. After we talked it over then he could see my phone, but we would always go through it together. This seemed fair to me. My phone was never off limits, there just needed to be open communication. Anyways, he would always offer for me to see his phone in return but I would decline. I didn't feel the need to and I had learned from past experiences that if you go digging, you will most likely see something you can't unsee.
Then one day he needed to have his wisdom teeth removed. I dropped him off in the morning for his surgery and I was told I needed to hold on to his personal belongings and wait until the operation was over. No big deal. I know this is wrong and I shouldn't have but finally curiosity got the best of me and I looked on his phone. At first it wasn't malicious. I genuinely was just curious. But of course, I saw things I wish I could unsee. It started off on tiktok. In one of his conversations with a friend, he poured his heart out, explaining how he was still so in love with his ex and missed her like crazy. Of course it stung a little to see the things he said but I knew there was someone before me so it wasn't that surprising. That was until I saw those messages had been sent in mid October. So of course i was like huh.we started talking early October and dating early November. So clearly he wasn't over his ex when he met me. But I was willing to forgive it. It wasn't a deal breaker. But Instead of putting the phone down to protect my peace and his privacy, I kept looking. And boy did I find a lot. I found lots of old text messages from contacts that were not saved. Most of then were hard-core sexting and flirting. This dude literally acted like a dog.And yeah it was again hard to see but it was before me and he wasn't like that anymore. With me, he was gentle and respectful and never treated me like an object. Some people just go through a phase and that's okay. Again, it wasn't a deal breaker. But finally i found some very passionate, lovey, intimate messages with an unsaved contact. I was immediately drawn in by the kind words and heartwarming love messages. Whoever this was, they cared for eachother very strongly. I almost immediately felt heartbroken. Not because she was a past love interest, but because he had never spoken to me the way he spoke to her. I read all the way from the top of the conversation. Months worth of love confessions, paragraphs of strong feelings, longing to be with one another, etc. But finally halfway through in one of the paragraphs I see a name. Molly I was shattered. Molly was the girl who supposedly was removed months before him and I even met. The one that was "just a friend" who messaged him and he removed her because he didn't want to be friends anymore. Yeah clearly they were more than just friends. I was livid and felt crushed. Why did he feel the need to lie about something so unnecessary? I wouldn't have been mad if he had told the truth about who she was. But then it got me thinking. Was Beth truly just a friend? Was Jen truly just a friend? What was the actual relationship? I gathered up as much as I could but then the nurse came to the lobby to tell me he was awake and ready to go home. I kind of panicked and in my hurry, I forgot to delete the screenshots out of his phone.
We get in the car and I give him his phone, he's still pretty loopy. Obviously I had a million questions to ask him but I knew he wasn't in the right state of mind to have that conversation so I put my feelings aside and decided it could wait. Well he wanted to take pictures of his bloody swollen face and send it to his uncle. In the process, he sees the screenshots i had forgotten to delete off his phone and immediately screams what the f*** is this? I tried to talk calmly and explain that now wasn't a good time to talk about it and it could wait. He kept pressing "what the f*** did you do? Who the hell is this?" In my mind I thought "uh dude, you tell me." But didn't want to escalate it while he was drugged up. I decided the best option was to simply say that I wasn't mad , I stilled planned on taking care of him while he recovered and that we would need to have a conversation when he was in a better state of mind. He just started sobbing. Oh boy. I kind of ignored it as much as I could. I drove us to the store to get ice cream and other soft foods he could eat before taking us back to my apartment. I helped get him set up in my bedroom and he still was crying. So much so he started coughing out blood. It smelled awful and got everywhere. He was a wreck. I felt bad for everything. I felt guilty for going on his phone behind his back, for leaving the screeshots on his phone and for him crying. It took several hours but eventually I got him to calm down. I kept my word and continued to take care of him until he was recovered.
Finally when enough time had passed I decided it was time to sit down and talk about it. I explained that obviously I had found messages and i wanted an explanation. He told me molly was just a friend, and very clearly it was more than that. I also explained that I had a suspicion that he was not fully honest about his relationship with Jen and Beth either. He looked me dead in the eyes and said he had no idea what I was talking about and they were just friends. I remained calm and explained that I won't be mad at him or leave him. I told him I didn't want to fight. I just felt as though I deserved to know the truth if I was going to continue to be with him, especially since he was still in contact with Beth and Jen while we were dating. We continue to go back and forward for several hours with no progress. I decided then if he didn't feel I deserved the truth, I would find out for myself. I took the screenshots I had found and reached out to the contacts one by one.
Let's start with Beth. She was the quickest to respond. I briefly explained who I was and that I was hoping to ask some questions about my partner because I felt like i was being lied to and was hoping she could fill in some of the gaps. She texted back and simply asked "do you work at blank" I responded that yes, I did. She then asked if I lived at a specific apartment complex. I said yes and was creeped out. She knew where I worked and lived. She then asked if she could call me. I agreed. For some context, he told me that she was a friend he had met in school. He explained that she had gotten out of a rough relationship and he wanted to make sure she was okay when it happened. That's how they became close. He explained that they would hang out all the time and eventually she became obsessed with him. Well during my phone call with her, I heard a very different story. Yes, they met in school and initially started off as friends. But, slowly with time as they started to spend more and more time together, they started to catch feelings. He said I love you first. And she proved this with screenshots. She also sent me pictures of them holding hands and kissing. She explained that they never officially started dating but they definitely were more than just friends. Their relationship was much more physical and romantic than platonic. She also told me that they had hooked up about 3 times. She explained that they had eachothers location and pretty frequently they would make plans then he would last minute cancel. So she would see what he was doing and would see him at two very specific addresses. Visiting my work or my apartment. She eventually asked him where he was and he told her that I was his cousin and was trying to get out of a rough relationship so he was helping me. I felt sick. No wonder why she was "obsessed" he was borderline dating her, telling her he loved her, and then started to ditch her when he made things official with me. Then it killed me to realize that even though they never had an official title, he was dating the two of us at the same time. I didn't know what to do. I ended up apologizing to her for everything he did and told her I never would have agreed to be his if I knew he was entertaining someone else. Michael overheard this phone call between us and looked like he had seen a ghost after. All he did was started crying, said she was lying, and that she was only a friend. I asked "so....these screenshots and pictures are all made up?" No response. He knew he was busted.
I decided I needed to take some time to process that information and I didn't want to say something I would regret. I let him stay at my place because he had nowhere else to go and I went to stay with a friend. He kept calling and texting but I couldn't deal with it. I cried all night. I was a mess. I should have just accepted that I was cheated on and lied to but I couldn't leave. I needed to know the truth. So I kept reaching out. Next up was Jen. I never was able to reach her, but I found out through Michael and Beth that Jen was Beth's best friend. But even more than that, I found out the three of them had a threesome together. He had told me previously that he had never been interested in a threesome and would never want to have one. Then I found out not only did he have one and lied about it, but it was with two girls he told me were just friends.
I went back to my apartment the next day and tried to talk stuff out. He just continued to say they were just friends. I finally snapped. I screamed and cried and told him that I just wanted to know the truth. That I deserved the truth. He looked me in the eyes, pinky promised me no more lies. We talked for a while and basically he explained that he never had an official title with Beth. They were very close but he basically just used her to pass time because he had nothing better to do. He said he loved her because that's what she wanted to hear and he treated her like a partner without ever having any real feelings for her. He knew as soon as he met me that he wanted me but didn't want to hurt her so he just kind of pushed her to the side but kept her in the picture. I felt so sad for her. He used her. He led her on. He treated her like an object and then threw her to the side when he met me.I asked why he lied about having a threesome. He said he felt ashamed Apparently they started to do it and then he chickened out so he didn't really count it. That made sense to me. I was pissed that he lied but at least it made sense. Next I asked why he told me Beth and Jen were just friends instead of being honest about the relationship. He said he never had feelings for either and they never had the official title so he didn't think it was important and he did not want to scare me off. I explained to him that although I understand why he lied to me, I didn't forgive him. I warned him that I would not tolerate anymore lies and obviously for the time being I did not trust him. I told him I wouldn't break up with him but if I found out he lied again, he would lose me. I also told him I considered what he did as cheating since he was seeing us at the same time after him and I became mutually exclusive. After we concluded our conversation about Beth and Jen, I started thinking about molly and the messages I had seen. I asked him what their relationship was, he said just friends. I freaked and told him to give me his phone. I found their old messages and told him to read them. "Hey goofball, you awake? Well if you're not I have something impossible to say to you. You are my sun, my moon, and all my stars. I love you lots and want you to know that no matter what happens I will always care about you. To me you are perfect. Amazing. And attractive asf. You are also very sweet and caring and adorable. Don't think about the negative things about yourself that will drag you down. You are way more than that. This is an official goodnight and I love you goofball." This is just one of the MANY messages sent back and forward. He reads the conversation and just goes oh. He then says he didn't remember any of that happening. We began to argue and the story he tried to spin was that his life must have been so traumatic that his brain literally deleted his past memories and replaced them with false memories where he didn't do these things that he is ashamed of. He got caught in lies and after so long was just like...whoa I did that? I had no idea I didn't remember. Technically I didn't lie because I told what I thought the truth was the way I remembered it. I told him I wanted to break up and he cried and begged me to forgive him and stay. I listened.i tried to move on and make things normal again but I couldn't stop thinking about all the lies and what else he might have been lying about. Then randomly one day, Molly added me back on social media. She was the last and took over 1.5 months so honestly I figured I'd never get ahold of her. I was genuinely surprised to see her show up on my friend list and reached out. Once again back story, he told me that she lived in Wisconin and they had never met. He said he was also using her for nudes and to pass time, same way he used Beth. He had told me that he removed her off social media months before him and I even met and aside from that one night she reached out, he hadn't heard from her in forever. I found out from her that she did not live in Wisconsin, she lived in the same state as us That to her, they were definitely dating and in love. I also saw a messaged saved on snapchat where he had been texting her in October (after we met) and even sent her the same pickup lines he had sent me. he had cheated with not just one, but two (at least that I know of) other girls.
At this point I had been broken so bad I didn't even feel the pain anymore. I just went numb. I had no more tears left to cry and couldn't be bothered to care anymore. I stopped eating and taking care of myself. I just went to work, came home, slept and repeated. I had watched the man that I loved and adored, one that made me feel so safe and happy turn into a monster right in front of me. He wasn't him anymore. I finally could see him for who he was. But I still didn't leave. He told me that he had only ever slept with three girls. I later found out it was actually six. He told me he had never been in love before. I later found out he tells basically every girl he's ever talked to that he loves them AND genuinely was in love with his ex before me. He told me after his ex and him broke up, he had a rebound but he only hooked up with her once before ghosting her. I found out they actually dated for several weeks, hooked up several times, and she had taken cute couple pictures with him and posted them on social media. He said that he never wanted to take those pictures, she made him put his Hands on her and pose and if he didn't cooperate, she would throw a tantrum like a child. One last thing I think that is important to mention,when we went on our first date, I told him I don't do hookups. We stayed out late and hit it off really well so I offered for him to stay the night at my place. I said I was okay with cuddling and whatever but I did not want to have sex. He seemed okay with it. I went to bed and then when I woke up, my pants were off and he was inside me. He claimed he didn't know I was asleep and thought I wanted it because apparently my butt kept rubbing against him while we were spooning.
It's been about a month since all that and I'm still just meh. I haven't exactly forgiven him but I also don't hate him. Things are normal. I act normal we still do couple things. But I can't help but wonder if he is just using me the same way he used them. I mean after all, he lives in my apartment rent free and asked me to buy him a truck for his birthday. He says I should forgive him because he genuinely doesn't remember doing these things and he didn't mean to lie to me. He said he's so ashamed of who he was but isn't like that anymore. He doesn't associate with who he was and wants to be given a chance to show that he is different. But can I ever forgive him? Should I? Where do I go from here? I feel so lost and confused. I dont think I'll ever be able to trust his word again. I dont feel secure. He broke me so bad I can't even feel anymore. Am I crazy and somehow making this a bigger deal than it is? Can I ever have the man I fell in love with back? I'm sorry if this was confusing. I'm typing this all out in one sitting. Please help me because I genuinely am so lost and I don't want to tell any friends because I don't want them to hate him.
TLDR: My boyfriend cheated on me with at least two other girls that I know of at the moment and has lied to me about too many things to count. His argument is that It doesn't actually count as cheating because he technically didn't date these people and he didn't remember doing it.

Hi there! 👋
I'm Gonçalo "Eugini" Oliveira, a passionate Dungeon Master who brings cinematic storytelling to every session, and I'm currently trying to achieve the most immersive TTRPG experience out there – and I would love your help in doing it!

A bit about Eugini – the Dungeon Master:

🎬 F*ilm & TV Professional: *Years of working as a Producer and Writer in the entertainment industry have given me a passion for creating worlds and making them a reality. Check out my credits and see if you (unknowingly) might've seen my work before!
📚 B*it of a Bookworm: *My love for D&D started with my love for books! My first book was The Little Prince, and that book is to this day my first love. You might catch this passion during sessions, where my style tends to focus on the narrative side of things, in both NPCs, storylines, descriptions – you name it!
😂 G*oofball: *I'm a sucker for a laugh. I value serious topics as well as great dramatic character arcs. However, it's my outgoing and carefree charisma that allows me to run NPCs as highly nuanced performances, usually doing voices and acting for the sake of story. When I perform during a session, I try to live each character as they are – serious or not!

About the Campaign:

Step into Barovia, a land ensnared by a vampiric curse. In The Mists of Fate: Strahd’s Legacy, your actions and decisions will shape the narrative in a player-driven saga full of deep storytelling and rich role-play. This Curse of Strahd campaign promises an immersive and cinematic experience like never before.
By taking advantage of Foundry VTT and other tools, such as AI-modules for highly personalized character creation, and creating a short-animated film featuring your characters after each section of the story, I aim to make your character feel real and ready for its own show! 🎥

Why Join Us?

🎬 C*inematic Storytelling: *Experience D&D like a blockbuster movie where immersion is king. State-of-the-art automation and cinematics paired with Foundry VTT will make the Theatre of the Mind feel alive on your screen every session.
🚀 E*xperience Innovation: *Never before seen use of AI for TTRPG will allow you to see your character come alive. After each chapter of the campaign, an animated short-film will let you relive your actions and their impact on the story.
🤝 C*ollaborative Gameplay: *Your choices will significantly impact the story. The way you make friends or foes ultimately decides your fate in this dreary land of shadows.
🌈 W*elcoming Environment: *Ideal for both newcomers and seasoned players. Our goal is to give you the most fun experience possible!
If you're ready to defy fate and venture into the unknown, join us!
Campaign settings in link below!
🔗 Sign Up Here
Working to make your dreams come alive!
Best, Eugini

So this manager (M) started working at our store a couple months ago, and she's pretty incompetent. She regularly needs assistance doing tasks that she does every day, the one weekly task she is in charge of she cannot remember to do or finish, she regularly screws up nightly data reports and messes up the formatting in spreadsheets that we then have to fix for her. She has been taught many times and doesn't retain the information, despite having her own notes and corporate guides to help her. But thats beside my main concern.
We work with this disabled guy (G) who comes in 2 days a week for a total of maybe 10 hours. He's kinda annoying and nosy and doesn't know when to butt out but its not his fault. He can be a little insufferable to be around and no one really likes him but we do tolerate him for the short amount of time we have to be around him. We all try to treat him with respect and patience like we would for anyone else. M has a tendency to try to pawn him off on other people so she doesn't have to deal with him; for example, we had a new hire and on his first day she had G training him, and he is definitely not qualified to train anyone. The new hire told another manager, who said that if he saw anything like that again to tell her no and have her assign someone else.
There's another incident that she actually did this twice with two different people, New hire comes in, and M is giving them a tour. They run into G, who starts to introduce himself and is asking the new hire their name. M interrupts G midsentence to say: "This is G, he has Tourette's." and then completely write off anything else G says, if he can manage to get a word in edgewise.
One of the new hires that this happened to I am in a romantic relationship with, and I referred him to the job. We have been keeping our relationship outside of work, and really the only hints that we are together is we carpool to work and the level of comfort with each other when we talk to each other, but we try to avoid that while we are at work. However, if we are directly asked if we know each other we don't hide it. It only becomes a problem when there's an imbalance of power, and there isn't. So after hearing us talk to each other with familiarity, she asks if we know each other and I told her that we lived together and figured that would be the end of that. I was not working today, but my boyfriend was and he was making casual conversation with G about the trip out of state that we are taking this summer. G asked why he was going out of state, and my boyfriend answered that he was "going with his girlfriend to visit her family." M was standing nearby and said to G "you actually know her" and trying to have him guess who it was, until she eventually just told him it was me. Like that wasn't your information to share, and we didn't want that broadcasted because its work. I'm a little hesitant to report that one because I'm not sure if corporate would have a problem with our relationship at work (management at the store has no problem).
What, if anything should I do? Should I make an official HR report? Should I just bring it to the attention of store management? Should I just drop it?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGRTRt2NWZg
OK, so there's a long theory here that got deleted while I was on my phone while posting this, but I'll summarize briefly...
Kanako is The Key to Monsterkind's Salvation using Determination Extract, Because Determination is In The Ketsukane Household's Names that describe the 3 routes: "Devoted, Decisive, Determined", meaning that The Ketsukane Family is not too dissimilar from Humankind, what with their roots being based in Kitsune Folklore & Whatnot.
That aside, I think I know why...
When the Determination Extract was leveled enough to be put into Kanako at an extractable level capable of not harming a monster, Chujin had almost perfected the perfect serum to protect Monsterkind against Becoming Amalgamates when they have too much Determination in their body, the keyword being "Termination", whereas "De-termination" is the eradication of...something, depending on what, it eradicates it, "Terminating" it as if it were a terminator of sorts. I am not saying that all humans are terminators, rather that "Determination" itself is a terminator by it's own proxy of it's own usage in how it is actually used, the keywords being, "Determined", as in, willing to go the distance to accomplish your own goals, as a Player.
However, something struck me as odd when Kanako got hurt by the bubble impact by the Needle not having the air pushed out of it properly... When the air impact struck, it likely hurt Kanako the same way as if a bullet were to accidentally hurt Clover or Frisk, since Bubble Impacts CAN kill, if inserted into a normal, living being!
Such to the point where it can kill, if not handled correctly!!! There's a lewd "1000 Ways to Die" episode that explains how she died was because the woman in that episode was so horny, that a huge air bubble impacted her veins, & suffocated her using her own veins against her, ceasing bodily functions from not having enough oxygen to the brain.
Now, if Monster's Organs work anything like Monster Magic Do, it's probably because they are made out of Monster Magic, but that is a topic for another day at another time or so ago later on today probably. Right now, we need to analyze Kanako's Critical Condition of Being An Amalgamate.
The fan-animation explains that Kanako did not Melt strangely enough, & I explained why: Because Ketsukanes, much like Humans, are Determined. Determined, being a reference to UT Vanilla's "Determination", which also likely means that Kanako's Experiment Ceroba knew next to nothing about when researching Chujin's Analysis on his Experiments, likely means That Chujin Almost Found A Cure to Stop Monsterkind from Becoming Amalgamates with too much Determination! And I think I know what happened next...
Deltarune, happened, or some sort of AU of Undertale where Monsters DO IN FACT BLEED, From Being Lightners. Lightners, being, The Gods of The Darkners as well, since all Darkners are objects that exist somewhere in Deltarune. "Why am I bringing this up?", you may think I am asking myself. To answer that, we first have to Analyze What Happens to Monsterkind once the cure serum is created...
MONSTERS. BLEED. Yes, you heard me right! With enough of a minimal amount of Determination, Monsters CAN IN FACT BLEED, which would explain why Sans bleeds in Undertale as well, since Deltarune & Undertale are likely a Timeloop of events that keep unfolding & surrounding each other, if Deltarune isn't actually a type of AU Sequel to Undertale as well. The main point being that which, we as Monsterkind have an obligation to fulfill that All Monsterkind is Looked After While Being Experiments on. Meaning, The True Lab is actually a type of Hospital for Amalgamates. I can already hear many people typing as soon as they've read this far saying "But Talon! That isn't what happened! We see Monsters DIE in The True Lab!" Not really, since they are more than likely resting, since even Snowy's Mom, Snowdrake dies probably long after Undertale, as indicated by Deltarune. However, you can talk to her before beating The Pacifist Route in UT Vanilla by going back through The Underground & Talking to Her & Her Family about what's going to happen next for them right away as well!
Things are...going grimly for Snowdrake, so much that she will die if nothing is done: The context right there is the key, that "Determination... Can Kill too as well."
[Insert Genocide Determination Theory Here As Well] The point being, that when taken to the extreme, Determination CAN Kill. We also see that Clover's Level of Violence is one that is from rage, a Deadly Sin. However, it raises an interesting point in us as humans... Can we get too angry that we gain temporary Levels of Violence? Depends on how VIOLENT you are being in UT Yellow. By that I mean, COMPLETELY SLAUGHTER MONSTERKIND IN A GENOCIDE ROUTE. Otherwise known as... The Vengeance Route. Vengeance being an unlawful for violent revenge used as justification for fulfilling a sense of Justice that just "feels deserved" when done right in UT Yellow, since it feels so earned as well. In UT Red & Yellow, Clover first depletes our Hopes by Half, & then Justice Blasts us so hard, our game crashes, & our save file is erased from existence, except that Now, Clover wants us to try a Pacifist Route Instead, & calls us out when we do it again over them.
By this point, Clover is clearly trying to steer us on the right path of our own Determination using Justice, which also means that Clover only wants what's best for everyone as well, Justice for Monsterkind using Pacifism in the True Pacifist Route of Undertale R&Y or UT Vanilla as well.
Meaning that regardless of whether Clover knew about Ceroba & Kanako, one thing remains certain... With Enough Determination, Monsterkind can potentially become somewhat normal & also mortal in Deltarune, as we also see in several versions of Deltarune Yellow as well, which also means that since Kanako lives in that timeline from no Amalgamates existing, Amalgamates weren't created because The Experiments were a complete success!!! Which also means that in Deltarune, Chujin actually made the perfect Serum that Ceroba tested on Kanako to make sure if Chujin's work efforts were correct or not, regardless of if she disobeyed Chujin's Instructions to use Another Boss Monster Instead, or even just by being convinced by Kanako that IT WOULD WORK... Almost.
Kanako does not change forms as an Amalgamate, Alphys explains. She stayed the same, likely because Ketsukane's Are "Determined", meaning they have Determination! The Ketsukanes are The Key to Monsterkind's Salvation, once Kanako was discovered that she neither died nor changed forms, & remaines stable, because NOW we know that Kanako can provide a Clue as to How Much Less Determination that Monsterkind would have needed!!!
Looking again at Snowdrake, Snowdrake Monsters are actually quite large, so you'd think she'd have a lot of Determination injected into her, right? Well, you're right about that, but the key-wording is "how much", since we also know that Snowdrake, Snowy's Mom was also injected A LOT OF TIMES with A LOT...of DETERMINATION as well. Which also means that depending on the size of the mass, it must be proportional the size of the monster, just like in-real-life medicine would be applied to conduct experiments on people & animals as well, because we all know that science provides experiments with human test-subjects, which also explains Why Kanako Needed Less Determination than What She Was Given to Become More Like a Human & Be able to bleed, & also become more like a Deltarune Monster.
• • • TL:DR: Uh Oh, Spaghettios, Kanako had too much Blue Determination Lasagna for lunch, & now has a bad tummy ache from almost dying & choking on an air bubble by becoming an Amalgamate after almost dying...!
Yes, these are 4 sentences explaining what happened very shortly to Kanako in my theory, why do you ask? Thank you for reading. Hope you like my theory! ^w^

Backup account because people know my main.
I (M22) have been unhappy for years now. When I lived in my home state, I was homeless and using pills regularly after my parents passed away. Long story short, I met someone (M23) online just before they passed, and he would come to visit me once in a while even though he was about 3 hours away, he's the sweetest and kindest person I've ever met. When my parents passed and I spiraled, he took me home with him. His family has been so amazing to me, and I can't thank them enough for everything they've done.. I have a roof over my head, I haven't taken any pills, I have a full time job and a part time job.. but I feel like such a burden every single day.. I don't make enough money to have my own apartment, even if my partners income was involved, I don't have a car or even a license for that matter.. the average rent in our area is around $2,400 a month. I only make about $2,200 a month between both jobs, and with my secondary insurance, personal items, phone bill, rent, and groceries, I have about $200 left at the end of every pay period (biweekly) to put towards my savings. My partner has student loan payments, car payments, gas, groceries, phone bill, rent and car insurance to pay.. I don't know how much he has left at the end of the month, but he doesn't make much more than me so it can't be a lot. I know this makes me sound like an ungrateful asshole, but I feel like all I do is take up space and cause problems.. I just wanna get on a train and leave, go somewhere out west and wander the streets again.. I was in bad shape last time, but I wasn't a bother to anyone, just the people walking over me on the sidewalk.. maybe I'll find a job out there, change my name, live by myself and leave everything I am right now right here.. I'm so sick and tired of being dependent on other people and making them feel like I'm their responsibility.. I just wanna start over again and keep to myself, I don't want friends anymore, I don't want love I don't want people anymore I'm so sick and tired of caring about everything.. I just wanna go away.

At the world’s top college of magic and technology, every day brings a new discovery -and a new disaster. The advanced experiments of the college students tend to be both ambitious and apocalyptic, with the end of the world only prevented by a mysterious time loop, and a small handful of students who retain their memories.
Surviving the loops was hard enough, but now, in his senior year, Vell Harlan must take charge of them, and deal with the fact that the whole world now knows his secrets. Everyone knows about Vell’s death and resurrection, along with the divine game he is a part of. Now Vell must contend with overly curious scientists and evil billionaires hungry for divine power while the daily doomsday cycle bombards him with terrorists, talking elephants, and the Grim Reaper himself -but if he can endure it all, the Last Goddess’s game promises the ultimate prize: power over life itself.
[Previous Chapter][Patreon][Cover Art]
“Should I be worried?”
Why would you be worried?” Kim said. “Dean Lichman loves us.”
Dean Lichman had asked the two of them to stop by his office, though his brief message had not said what for. That left Vell to concoct nightmare scenarios in his head.
“He doesn’t love all of us.”
“Alex doesn’t count as ‘us’,” Kim said. She was a looper in purely a technical sense, mostly due to her own refusal to be a team player. “Besides, she’s been behaving lately. She’s only been an asshole, not an active liability.”
“That we know of.”
“If we don’t know about it, Dean probably doesn’t either,” Kim said. “It’s fine, Vell, he probably just wants to ask us for advice or deal with some problem he has.”
“That’s not much better,” Vell said. “How weird would things have to be that the Dean is asking us for help personally?”
“Only one way to find out,” Kim said. She gestured to the door to the Dean’s office.
Kim entered first, and found it in much the same state as it always was. The desk piled high with paperwork, a small bowl of assorted candies shoved into the corner of the desk, and Dean Lichman behind it, frantically tapping away on a laptop. Vell had not been in this office for several years, and it was vastly different than the last time he’d been here.
“Ah, there you are, come in, have a seat,” Dean Lichman said. “Unless you’d rather we have our conversation elsewhere, Vell.”
“Why would I want that?”
“Well, it’s my understanding you haven’t been in this office since my, uh, predecessor,” Dean Lichman said.
“Oh, right, the kidnapping,” Vell said. “No, I’m good, I don’t really get traumatized by things anymore.”
Vell had been killed too many different ways in too many different places to have a functional trauma response. A few days ago he’d gotten his legs chewed off by a vending machine, and still stopped by it to pick up a soda on his way to the office.
“That’s a very concerning response, Mr. Harlan.”
“Yeah. Anyway, what did you need?”
Dean Lichman gestured for the duo to take a seat, and both did so. He folded desiccated hands in front of himself before beginning to speak.
“I would like to ask you two to take a look at an experiment that will be occurring later this week,” Dean Lichman said. “I don’t have any reason to believe it poses a threat, but I would like to be assured it is a safe and ethical environment, and, well, you two have a knack for identifying trouble spots.”
“You could say that,” Kim said. It was more accurate to say that trouble had a way of identifying them -and then leaping at them and ripping their heads off.
“I’d appreciate it if the two of you could simply examine the laboratory and give it your approval, or disapproval, as the case may be,” Dean Lichman said. “Though if you’re too busy, I fully understand.”
“If you don’t think this is dangerous, why are you asking for our help anyway?”
“Simply for my own peace of mind, frankly,” Dean Lichman said. “The school’s policies on animal experimentation are...satisfactory, I suppose, but I do want to take extra precautions when the subject is a creature as smart as an elephant.”
“An elephant?”
“Yes, a resident of a reserve in Thailand,” Dean Lichman said. “An older elephant by the name of Mae Noi. She has cancer, apparently, and she is submitting to experimental treatment in the hopes it will be useful for younger elephants.”
Kim’s digital face briefly flashed with a facial expression of concerned skepticism.
“‘She’ is submitting to treatment? As in the elephant?”
“Yes. Apparently the elephant can talk,” Dean Lichman said. “No, I don’t know how it works, they said it was ‘more impressive in person’.”
“Well now I kind of want to go just to see the talking elephant,” Vell said.
“Same.”
“Well, do try to take a few glances at the experiment’s safety while you’re there,” Dean Lichman said.
“Sounds like a plan,” Vell said. “Thanks for the heads up.”
“I’ll be there too,” Kim said.
“Excellent. Thank you both, and I’ll try not to take up too much of your time,” the Dean said. He then bid them both a polite goodbye and returned to his mountains of paperwork. Vell took a step out of the office and then took a sip from the soda he’d recently retrieved from the evil vending machine.
“So, what do you think?”
“I think I really do want to see the talking elephant,” Kim said.
“Obviously, yeah, we all want to see the talking elephant,” Vell said. “I mean the whole situation. You think the elephant thing is going to be the daily apocalypse for that day?”
“Well, on the one hand, an elephant seems like the kind of thing that would kill us,” Kim said. “But on the other, I feel like the fact we have advance warning means it’s not going to happen.”
“True. The universe probably wouldn’t make it that easy for us.”
“Yeah, but the elephant thing still feels pretty threatening,” Kim said. “Only way to find out is to wait a few days, I guess.”
A FEW DAYS LATER
“Hello you two,” Dean Lichman said. “And Hawke.”
“Hey,” Hawke said.
“He also wanted to see the talking elephant,” Kim explained.
“Well, that’s not a problem, it was an open invitation,” Dean Lichman said.
“Thanks. Still, sorry for not saying I was going to show up in advance,” Hawke said. “It took me a long time to make up my mind whether I was more interested in or afraid of a talking elephant.”
“They are rather large, aren’t they? I suppose that could be intimidating.”
“I’m okay with elephants on their own, it’s the talking part that doesn’t sit right with me,” Hawke said. “What if the elephant doesn’t like me? What if I’m the first person to ever get insulted by an elephant?”
“You’re less afraid of getting trampled by an elephant than insulted by one?”
“I’m a little afraid of trampling, but elephants are chill,” Hawke explained. “They wouldn’t attack unless provoked. I kind of feel like one might call me a dipshit unprovoked, though.”
“You have oddly specifics fears, Mr. Hughes,” Dean Lichman said.
“Yeah.”
In spite of those fears, Hawke happily stepped through the door to the zoology lab. It did not take a long time to locate the elephant in the room, as it was a literal elephant. The towering pachyderm was in a makeshift pen in the center of the lab, with an ample supply of food and a strange pedestal in front of her.
“Dr. Chanthara,” Dean Lichman said, with a polite wave to one of the researchers in the room. “Good to see you. These are the students I told you about.”
“Hm. Nice to meet you,” Dr. Chanthara said. He was, perhaps not unreasonably, skeptical of why three seemingly random students were in charge of a safety inspection. The fact that one of the three was a robot made him even more skeptical.
“Hi, nice to meet you too, and, uh, don’t mind us,” Vell said. “We just have an eye for weird things other people might miss.”
“Sure. I- wait. Aren’t you that kid who got chosen by a god?”
“Yeah, that’s me,” Vell said. “And her too, technically.”
Kim shrugged. She didn’t care for any extra attention on that point.
“Right,” Chanthara said. He was beginning to see why these students might know their stuff. “I suppose we should start by introducing you to Mae Noi. Say hello, Mae.”
The elephant shifted on her feet and poked her trunk at the wide pedestal in front of her twice.
“Hello. Friends,” a synthesized voice droned. Vell stepped a little closer to the pedestal, just enough to see that there were an array of buttons on the side facing Mae Noi.
“Oh, it’s kind of like a keyboard,” Vell said. He’d seen similar things used with dogs, though usually in a much simpler fashion. Mae Noi seemed to have a few dozen buttons at her disposal.
“Smart,” Mae Noi said, with another prod of her trunk.
“We initially put it into our sanctuary as a bit of a novelty, something elephants could choose to interact with,” Dr. Chanthara explained. “Mae Noi took to it a bit better than most. Especially once she found out she could use it to ask for food.”
“Food. Pumpkin. Pumpkin. Pumpkin.”
“No, Mae, no food until after experiment,” Dr. Chanthara scolded.
“Experiment,” Mae Niko said with a prod. “Pumpkin.”
“Yes, experiment then pumpkin,” Dr. Chanthara said.
“That’s not really a talking elephant, is it?” Hawke said.
“It’s more talking than most elephants,” Dr. Chanthara said.
“Elephant. Smart,” Mae Niko said. “Smart.”
“Yes, uh, right, elephant smart,” Hawke said. He took a step back, to avoid any further offense and any further risk of being insulted by Mae Noi.
“You’re very impressive, Mae, don’t mind him,” Kim said. “How many words does she know?”
“Our platform back home has around three hundred words, though she’s still learning some of them,” Dr. Chanthara said. “The ‘travel’ version we put together only has a hundred, just enough to make sure she can get her basic needs met and communicate about the experiment.”
“Right, speaking of, I do believe we should put some time into our reason for being here,” Dean Lichman interjected. “You’re welcome to stick around afterwards, at Dr. Chanthara and Mae Noi’s discretion, of course, but we should get underway.”
“We probably should get to business, yeah,” Kim said. She tapped the side of her metal head. “I’m going to scan the lab. Vell, you talk to the elephant and make sure everything’s above-board.”
“Abov- oh, right,” Vell said. “Sorry, not exactly used to being able to ask animals if they agree to animal experimentation.”
“Experiment,” Mae said.
“Yeah, experiment,” Vell said, as he turned to Mae. “So, Mae Noi, this experiment might hurt, do you know that?”
“Experiment. Hurt. Elephant,” Mae Noi prodded. “Experiment. Help. Elephant. Help. Baby.”
“Help baby?”
“Baby. Baby. Elephant. Sick. Baby. Sick.”
“We’ve explained the nature of her condition to Mae Noi as best we can,” Dr. Chanthara said. “She has several children, and is concerned they might be similarly affected.”
“Help. Baby,” Mae Noi said. “Experiment. Help.”
The way Mae Noi frantically tapped the buttons tugged at Vell’s heartstrings, but he choked those emotions down.
“So you want to do this experiment to help baby, got it,” Vell said. “Even if it hurts you?”
“Elephant. Old,” Mae Noi said. “Hurt. Okay. Help. Baby.”
“Huh. Well, that does sound like informed consent to me,” Vell said. “Passes ethical muster, at least.”
The campus rules allowed students to be experimented on, with their consent, so Vell saw no reason not to apply the same standard to an elephant.
“You speak up if you change your mind about the experiment, okay?”
“Stop. Stop. Stop,” Mae said, mashing the same button a few times. “Yes.”
“You got it. I’m going to go help my friends check things out,” Vell said. “Good talking to you, Mae.”
“Good. Talk. Friend,” Mae said. She waved goodbye with her trunk, and Vell waved back. He wandered away from Mae Noi’s pedestal and found Kim and Hawke carefully examining rows of beakers and various other supplies.
“Nothing sus yet, boss,” Hawke said.
“Nothing caustic, mutagenic, or explosive?”
“Well, something mutagenic, but it’s supposed to be,” Kim said. She had scanners built into her body much like those that had once been in Vell’s glasses, allowing her to analyze the complex chemical formulas at a glance. “They’re going for some gene editing similar to what we’ve tried to do on human cancer patients. Low success rate, but not harmful. Some adaptations to work on elephants, of course.”
“Run it by any of our chemistry and biology student friends yet?”
“A few,” Kim said. “Haven’t gotten anything back yet, though.”
“Maybe run it by Skye, too,” Vell said. “She’d recognize anything that’d mutate an animal.”
“She does love to mutate things,” Kim said.
“Benevolently,” Vell insisted. “Just show her. I’m going to check for any stray equipment.”
The presence of an unusually large test subject had resulted in the lab being rearranged and reshuffled, so Vell did a quick scan for any misplaced equipment that might pose a threat. He found, to his surprise, a tidy and well-organized environment, with any and all extraneous materials securely locked away. There wasn’t so much as a shrink ray out of place. Vell did another loop just to be sure, but returned to his friends empty-handed.
“This place has less safety hazards than my lab,” Vell said. Hawke stared at him for a while.
“Why does your lab have safety hazards?’
“I do runecarving, there’s like, hammers and chisels,” Vell said. “Those can hurt people.”
“Mm, true,” Hawke said. “So you really didn’t find anything?”
“Nothing,” Vell said. “This place is secure as I’ve ever seen a lab be.”
“It’s like I said,” Kim began. “We got an actual warning about it, so obviously nothing’s going to go wrong. That’d be too easy.”
“Maybe,” Vell said. “Things can get teleported in, or someone could cast a spell, or something.”
“Yeah, but that applies to anywhere, at any time,” Kim said.
“Kim’s right,” Hawke said. “I say we go business as usual.”
“I guess,” Vell said. “We have to branch out a little, at least. Can’t keep an eye on one room all day.”
The trio stopped sulking around the outskirts of the lab and returned to Dean Lichman and Dr. Chanthara.
“Everything looks good,” Kim said. “Probably the safest lab I’ve ever seen.”
“I’ll choose to take that as a compliment,” Dr. Chanthara said.
“We have very high safety standards here at the Einstein-Odinson,” Dean Lichman said, defensively. “Relatively speaking. Innovation requires some risk.”
“I understand perfectly. So does Mae.”
“Hurt. Okay,” Mae said.
“Not that okay,” Vell said. “Nice meeting you, Dr. Chanthara. You too, Mae.”
“Wait.”
Mae prodded one of the buttons on her pedestal and then pointed her trunk at the three of them. Hawke looked deeply concerned, but stepped forward alongside Vell and Kim. Mae Noi appraised them with massive brown eyes, and then moved her trunk back towards the pedestal. Vell noticed a distinctive scar on the bridge of her long nose just as Mae Noi pressed another button.
“Joke.”
“...Joke?”
Dr. Chanthara sighed and rolled his eyes.
“Just go along with it,” he said. “She likes to tell her joke.”
“Uh, okay,” Vell said. “Let’s hear it.”
“What. Elephant. Favorite. Part. Tree.”
“Umm...I don’t know, Mae,” Vell lied. He’d heard this joke from a kid, once. “What part?”
“Trunk,” Mae said. She gave a loud bray of amusement and then slammed her trunk down a few more times to emphasize the punchline. “Trunk. Trunk.”
“Oh, ha, I get it,” Kim said, hoping her feigned laugh was convincing. She’d never tried to lie to an elephant before. “Good one, Mae.”
Mae Noi shifted from side to side, looking pleased with herself, while the trio took a step back and stopped their feigned laughter.
“Did you give her buttons just to tell that joke with?”
“She gets upset,” Dr. Chanthara said. “I’m not even sure she understands the pun, she just likes people’s reactions.”
“As long as she’s having fun,” Hawke said.
“We’ll get out of your hair now,” Vell said. “Good luck with the experiment, feel free to let us know if you need a hand with anything.”
“I’ll keep it in mind,” Dr. Chanthara said. Some of his earlier skepticism seemed to have softened, but he did not seem entirely onboard with three strangers mucking about with his experiment. Vell and his friends left before they stretched what little goodwill they had any further. Mae Noi waved her trunk goodbye as the three left the lab and stepped back onto the quad.
“I’m going to try and sneak some classes in,” Hawke said. “Later.”
“I’ll check some of our usual hot spots,” Kim said, before she too left. Once again alone, Vell headed to one of his own classes, and called up Samson.
“Hey, Samson,” Vell began. “See anything interesting while we were playing with the elephant?”
“Well, I thought I clocked someone acting suspicious, but it turns out he was only sneaking around to go see his boyfriend,” Samson said. “Nothing apocalyptic, but I did get called a homophobe, which is pretty emotionally devastating.”
“I’m sure you’ll recover someday,” Vell said. “Keep an eye out. Usually the safer things look, the more dangerous things end up being.”
“Will do,” Samson said, before saying goodbye and hanging up.
***
Vell got increasingly nervous the longer the day went without its daily disaster. He thought about checking in on Mae Noi again, but then recalled Kim’s warning about it being too obvious, but then remembered that nobody had seen anything suspicious anywhere else, but then remember that Mae Noi’s lab had looked perfectly safe-
“Vell.”
“Huh?”
“You’re spiraling,” Kim said.
“I’m not spiraling, I’m just,” Vell said, with a pause for contemplation. “Considering multiple options.”
“In a spiral fashion,” Kim said. “Eat the damn french fries. Honestly, what’s the point of ordering so many if you’re just going to let them get cold?”
“It’s not like they’re going to go to waste,” Vell said. The same time loop that allowed him to eat massive amounts of french fries without fear of gaining weight also allowed him to avoid food waste. One of the upsides of life in a time loop.
“Just eat, Vell,” Kim said. “You worry too much about all this shit.”
“I’m in charge, it’s my job to worry about it,” Vell said.
“It’s your job to handle it,” Kim said. “There’s no point thinking about this shit before it happens, you spend all day thinking about an elephant and then the universe drops, like, a bat with tentacles on your head. Just deal with as it comes, Vell.”
Vell leaned on the table and managed to chomp down on a french fry or two.
“You know, next year, when I’m not running the show anymore, I’m going to call and see if you still think it’s that easy.”
“I sure hope so,” Kim said. “I’m saying all this shit trying to make myself believe it too.”
“Oh good, you’re lying to both of us,” Vell said. “That’s cool.”
“Fake it ‘til you make it, Vell, that’s how it goes,” Kim said. “Eat your damn french fries.”
Vell rolled his eyes and returned to his fries, which were now starting to cool. Thankfully he would not have to worry about finishing them. A loud crash from across campus interrupted him mid-bite and nearly made Vell choke on his fries. He painfully swallowed the half-chewed food and then looked over his shoulder.
“Son of a bitch, finally,” Vell said. A few years ago he’d found it weird whenever he was relieved about a disaster, but now he was just genuinely glad to get it over with. The waiting was as killer as the apocalypse. He tossed his fries in the trash and headed toward the sound of chaos, with Kim right behind him.
“Already told everybody?”
“Well, I may or may not have left Alex and Helena out of the loop…”
“Kim.”
“They’d find out anyway,” Kim said. “I got to use my brain parts to get in touch with them, even over wi-fi that shit feels dirty.”
“Just get in- stop.”
Vell held out his hand. Kim froze in place and did not move. Not intentionally, at least. There was a small amount of unintentional movement. The ground was vibrating.
“Always love a good earthquake,” Kim said.
“That’s not a quake,” Vell said. “That’s...footsteps!”
Vell grabbed Kim and dove out of the way just in time for something to barrel through the walls of the dining hall and stampede across the room. Tables, chairs, and more than a few students were crushed under the feet of a hulking, brown-furred behemoth as it charged. Kim picked herself and Vell up off the floor and tried to trail its progress.
“That’s a- oh fuck me,” Kim said. “Please don’t say you told me so.”
Vell got his bearings and looked across the room at the titanic form of a woolly mammoth. Though it was definitely recognizable as an archaic mammoth, the ancient creature was also heavily mutated, unnaturally large even by mammoth standards, and with multiple curled, jagged tusks protruding from a slobbering maw.
“Well that could be unrelated,” Vell said. “Mammoths can come from a lot of places, cloning accidents, time machines…”
The mammoth reached a wall, and rather than barreling through, turned around, facing directly towards Vell. A prominent scar covered the bridge of its broad trunk.
“Oh, nope, that’s definitely Mae,” Vell said. The scar was in the same place and at the same angle. Even a clone wouldn’t have an identical scar.
Once the revelation had struck, Mae took her turn. Vell found himself staring straight down the barrel of a very angry mammoth coming right at him at Vell-squishing velocity. Luckily he’d been charged at by a lot of creatures over four years of looping.
Vell jumped up and to the side, and latched on to one of the curled tusks, which made for very convenient handlebars. Kim did the same on the opposite side of Mae, and punched her in the head.
“Wait, wait, hold off on the violence for a second,” Vell shouted. He tried to wave at Kim to stop, but Mae was thrashing so violently he had to grip the tusks with both hands.
“Good plan,” Kim shouted. “Can you get Mae on board?”
Another set of tables got crushed underfoot. Thankfully the other students were out of trampling range by now, but Mae Noi’s feet were still coated in the blood of earlier victims.
“Mae’s smart, maybe we can calm her down,” Vell said. He then ducked to dodge a swat from Mae’s mutated trunk.
“Call me crazy, Vell, but I think this is more than just a bad mood,” Kim said, as she climbed up Mae’s seven jagged tusks like a ladder.
“We have to try,” Vell said. The loopers rule against hurting other intelligent life forms had some flexibility for blood-crazed mutants on violent rampages, but they had to at least try to reason first. Vell climbed up on of Mae’s tusks and looked into one of her bloodshot eyes for any sign of recognition. “Mae! It’s Vell, do you remember?”
The only response Vell got was an enraged trumpet, which he didn’t think was a “yes”.
“Come on, bud,” Vell said. “What’s an elephant’s favorite part of a tree, right? The trunk?”
The massive brown eye staring at Vell blinked, and he felt a brief glimmer of hope. He then felt a brief glimmer of his lungs being crushed as Mae swung her head and slammed her tusks into the wall, and Vell along with them. Kim punched Mae in the throat and then jumped across the tusks to grab Vell and carry him to safety.
“You okay, Vell?”
He opened his mouth to respond, and a pint or two of blood came out instead.
“Apparently not,” he mumbled. “I might be down a few ribs. And a lung. Or two.”
Kim carried Vell a safe distance from the fight and set him down on the ground, where he promptly spat out another mouthful of blood.
“Okay, uh, you just lie there and try to die peacefully, I guess,” Kim said.
“Way ahead of you.”
***
“Was that last bit as funny as I thought it was?” Vell asked. “I think the blood loss was affecting my sense of humor.”
“It was kind of hard to appreciate in the moment,” Kim said. “But as far as dying jokes go, it was pretty good.”
Vell and Kim walked into the lair for their morning meeting and joined the loopers that had already gathered.
“Okay, what’d I miss while I was dead?”
“Well, after Alex was done getting herself killed,” Samson began.
“You’re saying that as if it’s something to be ashamed of,” Alex said. “Vell also died.”
“Yeah, but he got killed trying to do something good. You got killed trying to do something stupid.”
“Trying to eliminate a threat is not stupid,” Alex said.
“We don’t kill intelligent creatures,” Hawke said. “Sometimes we punch them into a coma, but we don’t kill them.”
“When a dog bites, you put it down, I don’t see why the same principle doesn’t apply to a mammoth that’s crushed seventy people.”
“That wasn’t Mae’s fault,” Vell said. “She got mutated, or something. On that note: did you guys figure out what happened to Mae Noi?”
“Nothing,” Hawke said. “Looked like Mae smashed up the entire lab, trampled everyone involved in the experiment too. Nothing left to investigate, and nobody left alive to interrogate.”
“Typical,” Vell sighed. “At least we have an easy out. Dean Lichman was really concerned about the ethics of that whole experiment. We raise some kind of complaint, we could probably get the whole thing shut down.”
“The problem is getting the complaint,” Hawke said. “That lab was airtight, Vell.”
“Apparently not completely airtight,” Kim said. “I can camp out in the lab and raise an entirely justifiable stink whenever something capable of making a murder-mammoth shows up.”
“And what if it happens so suddenly you can’t complain about it?” Samson asked. “For all we know that could’ve been some kind of dimensional rift, or time anomaly, or something. It might not be as simple as somebody just putting in the wrong syringe at the wrong time.”
“He’s got a point,” Vell said. “We might want to shut this down before it gets there.”
“Seems like our best option is to plant evidence, then,” Alex said.
Everyone else at the table spent a few seconds brainstorming ways to prove her wrong, and much to their frustration, could not.
“Okay, fine,” Vell said. “But it needs to be something incidental, not something anyone would get blamed for. We want to cancel the experiment, not get anyone in trouble.”
“I could have a seizure on some sensitive equipment,” Helena offered. “It’ll break something and nobody would dare get mad at me.”
“Can you fake a seizure?”
“No, but I’m allergic to elephants, so I’d probably have one anyway the moment I stepped in the lab,” Helena said.
“I don’t feel entirely comfortable sending you into anaphylactic shock for a bit,” Vell said.
“Offer’s on the table,” Helena said. “I’ll live. Wouldn’t have made it through that trip to the zoo otherwise.”
“Anybody have any non-medical emergency suggestions?”
“Seagull in the air vents,” Kim said.
“Will that work?”
“It happens now and then,” Kim said. “Seagull gets in, and Dean has to close down the whole lab for potential material damage and biohazard risks if they shit in the vents.”
“Really? We’ve never had to deal with anything like that,” Hawke said.
“It may shock you to learn that sometimes minor, tedious bullshit happens that we have nothing to do with,” Kim said.
“That is kind of surprising, actually.”
“Enough. Kim, can you grab a seagull?” Vell asked. He shouldered his bookbag, and stuck a hand into the extradimensional pocket that existed within it. “I can probably smuggle it in with my bag.”
“Yeah, I can get you a seagull,” Kim said. Since she did not need to sleep, she had to find ways to keep herself entertained at night, seagull-grabbing being among them.
“Alright, we’ll go grab one and put it in the bag,” Vell said. “The rest of you, be ready to meet us when I call.”
***
Roughly three minutes later, Vell put out the call and they reconvened in front of the biology lab.
“Yeah, that was much faster than I thought it would be,” Vell said.
“I’m great at grabbin’ birds,” Kim said. Seagulls were among the easier birds to snatch, even. They were suckers for food, and many of them were attracted to her shiny metallic body anyway.
“Let’s just get this over with,” Vell said. “I want this thing out of my bag ASAP.”
Even though the seagull was safely within a pocket dimension, Vell would swear he could still feel the bird thrashing and squawking inside his bag. He tightened his grip on the shoulder strap and led the way towards the zoology lab entrance. He grabbed the handle and held it as he froze for a second.
“Vell, what’s up? Is this bird escaping?”
“No, the handle’s vibrating,” Vell said. It was shaking the same way a wall near an incredibly loud speaker might. He pressed his ear to the door and listened closely. He opened the door immediately, and let all his friends hear the frantic trumpeting of a panicked elephant.
Inside the lab, Mae Noi was stomping her feet and trumpeting as loud as he long trunk would allow. She swayed from side to side in her pen, bumping against the walls not quite hard enough to damage them, but hard enough that it was clear she was doing it on purpose.
“What the heck is happening here?”
“Ah, Vell,” Dean Lichman said. He hustled over to Vell’s side and gestured to the entire room. “Maybe you can figure out what’s going on.”
Mae Noi stopped braying long enough to start mashing her trunk against her pedestal, mashing out the word “Bad” over and over again.
“Our test subject, Mae Noi, has been throwing an absolute fit ever since she got here,” Dean Lichman said. “Dr. Chanthara, these are the students I was telling you about earlier.”
While Vell reintroduced himself to Dr. Chanthara, Kim and Hawke stepped up to examine Mae Noi and her enclosure. It was a far cry from the peaceful, orderly scene they had examined on the first loop. They were half an hour earlier this time than before, but Kim found it unlikely that they had been able to calm Mae Noi down, clean everything up, and get back to work in such a short amount of time. They hadn’t mentioned any of this panic on the first loop either. They were soon joined in their confusion by Chanthara and Vell.
“We’ve tried everything; food, water, her favorite toys, even videos of her children,” Dr. Chanthara said. “We’ve even offered to call off the experiment, but she won’t listen.”
“She is an animal,” Alex said. “Sometimes they do things arbitrarily.”
“Not Mae,” Dr. Chanthara said. “Some of our sanctuaries residents from traumatic backgrounds can have outbursts, but Mae was injured in the wild. She’s never been like this.”
“Maybe some experiment on the island is upsetting her,” Vell said. “A sonic experiment only she can hear, or something…”
Vell stopped and thought about it. If there had been such an irritant, it would’ve been there on the first loop too. Everything always repeated exactly the same, except for-
“Could you, uh, take a step back for a second?” Vell mumbled. “I want to try talking to her.”
“Don’t get close,” Chanthara warned him.
“I’m not, I’m not,” Vell said. He didn’t need to get very close to tell a joke.
The massive brown eyes of Mae Noi stayed locked on Vell as he approached, and she continued to mash the “Bad” button on her pedestal.
“I know, I know, bad,” Vell said. “But, uh, do you want to hear a joke?”
Mae Noi stopped. She locked eyes with Vell for a few seconds, and then cautiously tapped a button on her pedestal.
“Joke.”
“Right, joke,” Vell said. He tried to recall the exact sequence of words Mae had used on the first loop. “What elephant favorite part tree?”
Mae didn’t blink.
“Trunk,” Vell said.
After a moment of contemplation, Mae Noi let out one final, fervent, trumpet, and then started mashing buttons on her pedestal again.
“Bad. Help. Help. Experiment. Bad. Help. Bad. Help.”
“Yeah, bad help, one second,” Vell said. He turned away from Mae Noi to look at Dean Lichman. “Hey, uh, excuse me, Dean? Hey, uh, if I remember correctly there are some pretty complicated rules on having intelligent animals on campus, yes?”
“Well, yes,” Dean Lichman said. After hearing of some questionable ethical practices involving an octopus back in first year, he had instituted a few clauses into the school’s ethical code of conduct regarding intelligent animals like elephants, octopuses, and dolphins. “Mae’s presence here is a bit of an outlier, but there were workaround, given her apparent consent to the experiment.”
“Yeah, about that, is she, uh,” Vell began. “Is she registered as a student?”
“Yes.”
Vell pursed his lips. It took a few seconds for his friends to catch on.
“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” Samson snapped. He turned his back on the crowd and leaned against a wall while Hawke put his head in his hands.
“The first rule of looping,” Alex said quietly. “Loopers are randomly selected-”
She looked up and locked eyes with Mae Noi.
“From all registered students.”

Long story short, I just like the meaning of the name Adad, but want other options for variations of the name. It's for a story I'm writing. The main character is a girl and while I'm not exactly opposed to naming her Adad anyway, I know it would throw readers off and I really enjoy giving my characters longer names. Right now I'm calling her Adalia (nickname: Dali).
Any thoughts on variations or anything that sounds similar enough that I can just sort of pretend that it means "Storm and flood"?

hello there,
what to say? where to begin? it's hard to encapsulate myself, but i know i seek a loving partnership, someone i can love, feel loved by, and to believe it. love back, and for them to believe it too. sounds great, doesn't it. that's my core. around it however isn't as straightforward. i'd say i'm hard to love, but what love i do share with you is beyond doubt. i'm not a fan of egoistical behaviour, in myself or in others. sex isn't high on my agenda, and only if it's based in something truly genuine, otherwise you'll just be receiving my lust. regardless, it's been a while so you'd have to win me over. i'm into the caring, lasting side of love more than anything like that. i consider it real love, but it seems either not that special to others, or perhaps the complex parts surrounding my core ultimately tilt the scales unfavourably. anyway. i think i'm pretty normal in terms of decency overall. i'm both a polite gentleman, and a foul-mouthed black heart, a lover of life itself, and a misanthrope. i'm both broad in my likes, and also a creature of habit who doesn't like change. maybe something's not quite right with me to have such breadth, but that's just me. words are important and so i don't lie* (*99.9% of the time), or make promises i fear i couldn't fulfil. if we agree upon a tryst, you'll always find me at our chosen spot. i do silly things, like take big risks for small gains. maybe you're the type to keep me in check? i'd listen. i don't want a toy who thinks a man will be fun, but someone with motherly traits who enjoys bad jokes and the simpler things. slowness over haste, quietness over noise, subtlety over directness, but not in all cases. someone to rely upon. never to question whether they'll ever leave. to never have that thought. that battle is mostly mine to overcome however. the foundations of my wants are very deep and sincere. on top of the basement, a home of smiles, kind eyes, humour, physical affection, and an intellectual, romantic bond. with it comes the flip side which is equal, in measure, and that's why nobody can take it i think. it is what it is, but i'm willing to improve. i'm a loner , partly by choice. i don't fit in, and although there's the continual pain of wanting to, to fit into what i see? i'd rather be alone. with you would be the better outcome. communication is very important to me; i want to live on the same planet and within the same moment as you. music means a lot to me. in short, i'm deep, incomplete without you, with a good-natured heart struggling to remain that way. on the surface, others wouldn't be able to tell, probably, as i like to stay mysterious. my eyes do say a lot though, and i'd want you, the sensitive type, to be able to read them, to be able to notice the details of body language and emotion, assured that i'd do the same.
a one-of-one. order today.
p.s. i miss you, and your name..? beautiful.

Quick note; mentions of suicide, depression, cutting, spoilers of Suicide Boy (Park Gee) and OMORI (Omocat),
Has anyone ever seen Suicide Boy by Park Gee? It's a story about our dear protagonist Hooni and his various exploits at killing himself, but along the way he gains more friends which eventually lead himself to stop trying to kill himself. It's a story that's there, some don't like it, some do. Infamous for a lot controversy that is constantly warred over by both sides, you'll want to see both sides before making a judgement.
Regardless, I couldn't help but notice parallels between Hooni/Sunny.
Let's go over character design. Both Sunny and Hooni have pale-white skin, due to their lack of 'going' outside, black hair and eyes, as well as a seemingly depressing look most of the time. Not only that, but they also both have white shirts, vests [though different colors], and black shoes. Though Hooni tends to be more expressive than Sunny, unless we're talking about the greatest emotion Sunny can feel.
Another thing about Sunny and Hooni is their suicides, Sunny kills himself at the end of the Bad Route and Double Suicide Ending, whereas Hooni doesn't die but he does try and kill himself in the story. Not to mention Hooni and his self-harm addiction, along with Sunny's steak knife addiction [wow he carries it everywhere he goes].
Let's also go over their relationships with their various characters. As well as look at some parallels between characters. Lee Hoon, which is the actual name of Hooni, is paralleled between Sunny, while retaining some Basil personality traits, actually, he has a LOT of Basil traits.
Another is Jeong Soorim, which happens to be a parallel of Kel and actually is the first person to become friends with Hooni by knocking on his door, similar to Kel. Both are sunny characters who can put a smile on one's face, and both are bright and vibrant with great physical ability.
On the flip side, Jeong Harim is the parallel of Aubrey. Both are strong females with a knack and slight obsession with fighting, while also having a crush [or former crush] on the main character. Jeong Harim with Hooni and Aubrey with Sunny. Not to mention Jeong Harim liking cute things, whereas Aubrey could also be interpreted as liking cute or pink things in general.
I guess Hero would fittingly be Kim Jaehoon, a studious and mature 'older figure' who focuses on his studies and helps the others. Though the major difference is their age, their actual personality, and more. Kim Jaehoon is willing to hurt Hooni in order to escape the fate of being targeted by bullies, whereas Hero would willingly jump into a lake to save Sunny. Then again, both do know their friends for a different amount of time.
Honestly? I could probably go on and on, but I'd rather everyone to take the plunge and see it for yourselves. Come up with your own interpretations and analyzations for them. I'd also look forward to seeing Hooni & Sunny types of fanfictions, as the few that are there, aren't really many of them, one in fact. That being Hangman by Yeestlet. A short story of sorts.
Anyways, that's enough out of me. See ya next time!
(If the image above works. Then you can see the very, very similar contrast between both Hooni and his blond friend, with Sunny and Basil.)

To start this story off, I suppose it's best to talk a little bit about myself and my experience in the TTRPG space. I've been an avid TTRPG enthusiast for almost two decades now. Yes, I'm a bit of an old hat/old fogey. I started my enjoyment of the hobby with Pathfinder 1st edition, eventually transferring over to DnD 5e when it first arrived on the scene, mostly because it was the new hotness, but I ultimately found that it was better suited for the type of games that I enjoy running at my table. While I very adamantly enjoy the structure that a game's mechanical rules bring to the table, 5e provided a rules system that wasn't invasive, and so me and my friends were able to focus on the things about the game that we enjoyed the most - the roleplaying, the storytelling, and (most importantly) the fun.
Many years would go by, as well as a couple of what I would consider to be successful campaigns - basically anything that managed to survive longer than 3 months. Scheduling, right? I digress. Eventually, I arrived at a point where my current circle of friends and I were itching to play a new campaign, and for the shits and giggles of it we decided we would livestream it on Twitch. At the time, we had managed to get affiliated on Twitch, and one or two of us would occasionally have a couple of viewers pop in when we were streaming whatever video game we were playing, and we figured it would be fun to do the same thing with our next campaign. So we did. As you might expect, nothing really ever came out of it. We were just doing it for fun. The campaign only lasted about 3 months or so, and we never set out with the expectation that what we were releasing into the world was anything amazing - we were just four normal dudes having fun playing a game we enjoyed, and if you happened to find yourself on our Twitch channel to see it, awesome! If not, cool. We weren't doing it for you.
So, yeah, that campaign eventually fell off, and we would eventually return to just streaming whatever video game excited us. One of friends got married, and had a kid, and was too busy for DnD. Another friend got a new job, and his schedule just didn't give him the time. Hell, even I managed to land a pretty decent job at the time, and I struggled to make time for our weekly video game nights, but I managed. But ever since that streamed campaign had ended, I had an itch in the back of my mind that I really wanted to scratch. I thoroughly enjoyed everything about livestreaming our campaign. Sure, it was nothing to write home about, but I fell in love with the showmanship of it all. Maybe it was because of the thought of the potential for someone to eventually watch it, but whenever we would stream, I would get in the zone and pretend I was putting on a show for thousands (even though we may have only ever had three or four viewers at max). Basically, I had fallen in love with the idea of putting on a show for others, and I knew I would jump at the chance to do it again in the future. Enter Wayne.
A little over a year ago (at the time of this posting), I was perusing through the /LFG subreddit and not looking for anything in particular, when I stumbled across a post that checked off all the boxes.
I don't like to admit that I'm picky, but that fact that this sub exists should give credence to that fact that one should, at the very least, have a criteria when looking for games to invest yourself in when looking at advertisements. And if my little backstory above should inform you, there were a number of things on my checklist that this post had. For starters, it was longer than a few sentences. Clearly, the person who posted this was meticulous about what they wanted and what they didn't want (I would learn, much later on, that Wayne was not the one who wrote the post, but one of his players). Secondly, the post was very adamant about what was of paramount importance at the table - rich and compelling narratives, deep exploration of characters, and a passion for roleplay. And thirdly, the plan was to turn this into a "production". The post even included a promo video of respectable quality. Clearly, the people involved with this had a plan, much more of a plan than my friends and I had when we streamed. And, I considered myself a pretty decent roleplayer, so I applied. They were only looking for 1 applicant, but I figured I had a decent shot, with my previous livestreaming experience, and the fact that I already owned a (what some would call excessive) microphone and camera. So I shot my shot. If I didn't get picked, no biggie, life goes on. But when I received a discord invite and told that I had made it to the second round of the application process, I was ecstatic.
It is around here that I should introduce you to our cast of characters (names have been changed, of course:

• There is, of course, me, Dave - a guy who fundamentally believes that fun and safety at a table supersedes everything else, who happens to really enjoy hamming it up in character, and telling exciting stories.
  
• Ava - an already confirmed player at the table, with a past experience of playing with Wayne. I would come to find out that Ava was the one who had written the LFG post. Ava was also in charge of Discord moderation, and the second round interview process. She has her own story, which I will allude to here, but is ultimately hers to share.
  
• Jelly - Wayne's significant other. Jelly was supposedly not involved with the upcoming campaign at all, but had a presence on the Discord, and have previously played in Wayne's campaigns.
  Seth - another already confirmed player at the table. Admittedly, Seth plays a minor role in the story, but his inclusion is necessary.
  
  • and Wayne - the lead character of our story. The DM of the upcoming campaign. The visionary. The guy who plans to have the next big thing in the TTRPG actual play space.

There are at least a half dozen other individuals involved in this story, but ultimately play very minor roles. If at some point while I am writing this one of them pop up, I will update the list above to include them.
Back to the story. I was ecstatic to find out I had been selected for an Discord interview and scheduled it at my earliest convenience. This is where I first meet Ava. To be honest, I don't recall much about the interview, but I remember it being pretty standard and what I was expecting an interview to be. Mostly it was just going into detail about some of the stuff I had included in my primary application and talking about expectations and goals. I was told that after the Discord interview, the next step would be a participation in a practice one shot, to get a feel for how I would play at the table. After the interview was over, Wayne hopped into the voice channel, and this would be when I would meet the man, the legend.
I pride myself on being very good at reading people. I can usually pick up on when someone is trying to sell me something, pretty quickly. I tend to over analyze words and expression looking for intent. I have been gaslit and manipulated several times in my past by people very close to me, and so I have developed this defense when meeting people for the first time. Very rarely do I take someone at their word, or completely buy what they are selling when I hardly know them, and even less so to a complete stranger. In this case, when meeting Wayne for the first time, my defenses failed me.
Perhaps it was because it had been over a year since I last ran a campaign. Perhaps it was because it had been even longer than that that I actually got to be a player in a campaign. Perhaps it was because of that itch of wanting to perform again for an audience. Or, perhaps, it was because Wayne was very good at pitching his plans. Whatever the reason, my first impression of Wayne was that this was a guy who had a plan, and had the means to enact that plan, and I wanted to be a part of it in any way that I could.
Wayne, you see, had two big passions in life. The first was DnD. The second, as he would admit, was being an entrepreneur. He owned his own business in New York City. One of several ventures he had pursued, and it afforded him a premium NYC apartment and the time and luxury to spend on his second passion - playing DnD. And so, he thought, why not marry these two passions together? He had a great head for business. And according to him, the last campaign he had run was fantastic. So fantastic, he thought, that surely other people would enjoy listening to it. And so he hatched a plan - he would use his business knowledge and savvy to launch a Youtube channel that would be home to his next great campaign. But he had the foresight, at least, to know of just how saturated the DnD actual play space has become in recent years. If he wanted to be successful at this venture, he would have to stand out from the rest. And he had a solution to that. He wasn't going to put out just any old DnD actual play. He was going to create "DnD Cinema".
To do that, he said, he needed the right people that share in the same core philosophies that he had. Namely, a "pretentious level of hyperfixation on roleplaying and narrative storytelling". Most other actual plays, to him, were playing "beer and pretzels" DnD. You know, the type of game were you sit around with your friends having a good time and a laugh, where you might spend five minutes on an out of character joke, etc. Shit like that wasn't going to fly in this campaign. When you came to the table, you were going to be in character from start to finish. And recording sessions were going to be seven hours long. Could I handle that?
And I admit that I told him I could. Like I said, he had a way with words. He was clearly passionate about it. And he talked a good talk. And he was friendly enough. So he said he would be in touch. And the wait began.
Over the course of the next month or so, I would come to become friends with Ava and Wayne. We would hop into Discord and play games, talk about the upcoming campaign, etc. It was going to be several months before the campaign actually began recording, and so Wayne was still conducting the interview process while also working on worldbuilding for the campaign. He was also spending over $3000 dollars commissioning an animated table for the youtube video. This was clearly something he was very proud of, as he took every and all opportunity to talk about how amazing and innovative it was going to be.
You see, in Wayne's vision of "DnD cinema", the videos that would be put up on youtube would not include the faces of the players. Or battlemaps. Instead, it would be animated table that he could manipulate in editing at various cue points. It would feature portraits of the characters that would light up when they speak. It was the next big thing in the TTRPG space - a (frankly) audio only experience that was accentuated with the occasional fancy animation that cost thousands of dollars. No one else was doing it, he would say, and that would help him stand out even more.
It was also during these more innocent days that I would come to understand Wayne's obsession with Brennan Lee Mulligan. He idolized the guy. In fact, he would brag on multiple occasions that his significant other's job had her 3 or 4 degrees removed from Brennan - basically, she worked for someone who worked for someone who was involved with the Dungeons and Drag Queens season of Dimension 20, and he would often mention how he was hoping to use that connection to someday have a sit down and meet and greet with BLeeM himself. As time would go on, I would eventually find out that Wayne actually considered Brennan Lee Mulligan as his competition.
About a month would past before I would hear anything about my application. I never brought it up during our gaming sessions, as another core tenet of mine is that I don't want my friendship or acquaintance with someone to give me an edge over other candidates. I want my experience and what I bring to the table to stand on its own merit. This will come up later in our story. Eventually, I would get a message from Wayne asking me if I would be interested in participating in a try out one shot for the campaign. Apparently, he had completely forgotten that I had applied, and wanted to schedule in a last minute try out for me. My fellow players during the one shot would be Ava, some other member of the discord community, and Jelly.
I'll be honest, the one shot was nothing to write home about. And even Wayne would admit it was something he threw together last minute so that he could say I had my chance. I immediately found Ava to be a fantastic scene partner, and even for a one shot, put the time and effort into her character and actions. Jelly, on the other hand, was not that good. To be fair to Jelly, my criteria for grading her performance was strictly on the curve that Wayne himself said he was grading people on. I found her to be a very selfish player, who failed to pick up on narrative cues, and was solely focused on her time in the spotlight. But it was a trial one shot that didn't mean anything. My biggest take away from Jelly was that she was a player that I would not enjoy playing with in the future, and that I wouldn't seek out as a player at a table that I was DMing for. Not horror story bad (yet), but not good. Average.
When the application process was done, it would eventually come down to two choices. I was one. Wayne loved my southern twang, and thought it would sound good in a production. And we had become friends. The other was someone with a theater and acting background, who had been to Julliard. I was not selected. And I was okay with that. The decision did not impact my friendship with either Ava or Wayne, and we continued to hang out and play games together. I then learned of Wayne's new plan.
In the original posting ad for the campaign, it had been mentioned that a possibility for guest character appearing in the campaign could happen. The original idea was that, as members of the Discord community would play in one shots, Wayne would then be able to invite stand out performance to appear in an episode or two of the new campaign, as a gift to the community and to give those players a chance to play in a campaign with other players of similar caliber. This all changed as the months got closer to release date. The idea for guests at the table changed completely. Instead, Wayne's plan was to use the guest spots at the table as a networking opportunity. Don't forget - Wayne is an entrepreneur. This was a business venture for him, and successful businesses need to show growth. And he wanted to achieve growth at an accelerated pace. The plan was simple - as the channel grew, Wayne would scour the internet for similar channels with slightly higher subscriber count than his. Well, I say Wayne would do this. Wayne would actually pawn this off on to someone else. A tangent that I will perhaps need to touch on later in this story - Wayne was very good at finding ways of pawning off work on to others, and then taking the credit. He very much believe himself to be a manager, and other members of the Discord that showed any interest in the success of this venture as his employees. He would then engage in communications with these other channels in the hopes of achieving some Quid Pro Quo. You send someone to be a guest on our channel for a few episodes, and we'll shout you out. In return, he would send someone from his channel to theirs, and get a shout out in return. Something to note here - all of this was done without ever including his players in the discussion. He was offering them up to strangers without even asking if they even wanted to do that.
Time passes, and eventually recording for the campaign begins. It would be about two months into recording when Wayne approached me about being the first guest character. (At this point, I had been an active member of the Discord community for over six months now). He wanted me to be the first guest character for two reasons. The first was because I was familiar, and he wanted to test out the format before bringing in strangers. The second was because of my prior livestreaming experience. I was a part of an affiliated Twitch channel that met the criteria of having a slightly higher subscriber count than his. But for the most part, our old Twitch channel was dead. Sure, we still streamed games into the void, but there was practically no engagement. And I told him so when he asked me if I wanted to be introduced as someone from that Twitch channel. I was more involved in his community as that point, anyway. And so, I finally got what I was wanting - to sit down and play quality DnD with like minded individuals for the purposes of entertaining others.
At this point, only a handful of episodes had aired. The recording schedule had them a grace period of a month or so before release, and I admittedly hadn't watched them. Honestly, I wasn't that interested. I don't know if that's bad or not. There are a lot of actual plays out there of varying quality. And each one requires a lot of time commitment to watch. Already I was regularly watching Critical Roll, and I was having a hard time to find time to watch some of the other really good shows I was enjoying, like Dimension 20 and The Glass Cannon. On top of that, it was an game that I wasn't a part of, so yeah, I admit I hadn't watch any of it. But even if I had, it wouldn't have prepared me for what playing at the table was actually like. The released episodes were highly edited, with sound effects and music. It wasn't until I became actually involved at the table that I would find out just how manufactured the game actually was. And I use the word "game" very generously.
For starters, once recording began, all out of character talk and banter was immediately and explicitly forbidden. We were to remain in character at all times. Secondly, I would find out that Wayne had developed a "formula for success" in regards to time spent recording. No scene would ever last longer than ten minutes. If players spent too much time having their characters engaging with each other and the time elapsed, we were moving on the next scene, regardless of if it was a natural conclusion or not. Speaking of the characters, I would come to learn that the characters that the player brought to this campaign were secondary to the story that Wayne wanted to tell. "This campaign isn't character focused, it's story focused" he would say. The campaign simply did not have time for that. I don't like to toss out the word "railroaded" very often, but it quickly became apparent that there was a good bit of railroading being done here. The only character decisions or choices or conversations that would ever make it to the final cut were ones that provided what he thought would be the most interesting while pushing his narrative forward. And for a DnD game, there wasn't a whole lot of game being done here. Sure, the players had character sheets, and classes, but it was all superficial. Combat was a rarity on the level of a shiny Pokemon. I think mostly because Wayne didn't find combat narratively compelling. But in that case, I have to ask, why use DnD as your game system? If all you want to do is roll clicky dice and improv, there are much better systems out there. And speaking of the dice - I'm sad to say that in most cases they were superfluous, as well. The only real purpose the dice served to Wayne was when they could be used to clip epic moments of success or failure. A natural 20 or a natural 1 was gold for him, because then he could clip it into a Youtube or Tiktok Short and grow those subscriber numbers. For a game in which "every decision hung on the roll of a dice", there weren't a lot of dice rolls, there weren't a lot of decisions, and when there were decisions, most of the time, the outcome was predetermined by Wayne. Everything Wayne did in regards to this game was in service to growing his Youtube channel. And the sad part? It worked.
In a shockingly short amount of time, Wayne was able to grow his Youtube channel from just over a 100 subscribers to over a 1000. This was mostly done by his excessive push of Youtube and Tiktok shorts. For a short period of time, I was deemed trustworthy enough to have access to the Youtube channel's admin, and I could view the statistics. The turnover rate for shorts into actual video views was miniscule. Only a tiny fraction were tuning in for the actual show. At this point, he had just become a Youtube Shorts creator.
And I want to mention at this point - I understand and respect the hustle. The world of Youtube is a dog eat dog world, and you have to have to play the game to stay in the game - I get it. I don't have any issue with being proud of what you've created, and pushing it out to people. I really don't. My issue was with how deceptive Wayne was being with it. And how deceptive he was, in general, as I would come to find out.
You see, before the inaugural campaign had even launched, Wayne approached me one day to see if I would be interested in running a campaign on his channel, as I had experience before in it, and had expressed an interest in doing it again. And I will admit, I was excited about the prospect. But before my words of "Yeah, I'd love to talk about" even had a chance to dissipate into the ether, Jelly would hop into the channel, in the middle of the discussion to say, "You know who should run a campaign? Seth." And then immediately log off.
I don't have a lot to say about Seth. I think he is an amazing, caring, friendly guy. He also happens to be an incredible roleplayer and storyteller, and his character is Wayne's campaign is truly phenomenal. I envy how easy it is for Seth to get into and portray the wide arrange of emotions of a character. He also happens to be a great GM. I understand why Jelly would suggest him to run a campaign. What I didn't understand, at the time, were her motives. Wayne, Ava, Jelly, and Seth had all played in a previous campaign together, and Wayne and Jelly had become enamored by just how good Seth was. And even prior to that, Ava and Seth had a past campaign together. Jelly wanted to be a player in a Seth run campaign. And if Wayne was going to have a second campaign on the channel, she wanted it to be Seth's, and she wanted to be a player in it.
And so, immediately, any and all discussion about me running a campaign was ceased, and the legwork was put forth for Seth to run a campaign. Wayne would approach him about it, and he was interested. Seth would already have in mind the players that he wanted for it - two friends of his from outside the server, Ava, and another player from the Wayne campaign. Noticeably missing from that list - Jelly.
Strangely, Wayne would then tell Seth that if he was going to run a campaign on the channel, he would have to have an application process for the players, and open it up so that anyone could apply. After Seth had already stated he already had players in mind - players who already said yes. I don't know about you, but as a DM, I would never let someone dictate to me who I could have at my table. If I have players in mind already, it's because I have a reason. But Wayne demanded an application process be followed, and a second LFG post would appear in LFG for the Seth run campaign - that was noticeably advertising for 4 players. After Seth had chosen his players. The advertisement came with another well edited and narrated youtube promo that was, and still is, the highest viewed video on the channel. And all of it was a sham. Which I knew it was. And I confronted Wayne about it. It was then that I learned some unsavory backstory involving Ava and Jelly and the prior campaign. That is not my story to tell. I have shared my accounts of events with Ava, and she is considering posting an account from her perspective following this. The most I am willing to say on this is that involves situations that should never be okay at a DnD table, and that Wayne would gloss over and sugarcoat these situations as no big deal. It would lead to Ava not being comfortable with being at a table with Jelly which both I, and Seth, would understand.
Wayne, however, found this to be unfair and manipulative on Ava's part. Those past incidents should have had no bearing on Jelly's consideration for the Seth run campaign. Which is why he would demand an application process. He would then confide to me when I questioned the duplicity of the LFG advertisement that it wasn't completely misleading. There would still be someone chosen from the list of applicants - because he was going to make sure that Ava wasn't part of the campaign. After Seth had already told both Wayne and her that she was. After the players for that game had already come together for a session zero. He claimed that Ava had prior incidents of being difficult to work with, and that because he wasn't involved in the campaign, he couldn't be there to handle any situations that might arise of conflicts between players at the table. At the time I thought that was an odd statement to make - if you are trusting enough of another person, like Seth, to run a campaign on your channel shouldn't you be trusting enough in their ability to handle problems between players? Looking back now, I can only assume he made that statement because he was certain that Jelly would be a player at the table, and that problems might arise between Jelly and Ava. He asked that I keep the conversation between us. But that was something I could not do. None of that situation felt right to me. Wayne, Ava, and I had been friends playing games together for nearly a year now. I never saw any inclination of Ava being a "problem player" - she was great at the table, and a great person to hang out with. And I found it weird that Wayne would say those things about her, and not approach her about it. So of course I talked to her. For weeks she had been sharing her excitement of the new campaign with me, often with Wayne in the voice channel with us. Ava would then share with me her past experiences with Wayne and Jelly. Again, it is not my story to tell, but I am a good judge of character. I believed Ava's account of events. It made sense to me, with how Wayne and Jelly acted.
I wish I could say this story had a happy and/or satisfying conclusion. I'm not even really sure if there is a point to it, or even if it will be a good read. It has been clear for some time now that Wayne has been entirely obsessed with the growing of his Youtube channel, damn any and all bridges burned, and walking back some of his initial promises of what he claimed the campaign and the Youtube channel would be. It's also very clear to me that Wayne is someone who absolutely has to have control over everything, especially the narrative (fictional and real life).
There are so many minor grievances to air about Wayne that I haven't already touched on, and I feel like I've already taken up too much of your time already. Here's just a brief overview, I'd be more than happy to go into more details if you want them:

• Multiple players from the Wayne campaign confided in me about some of the problems they had with Wayne and how the game was being run. When Wayne found out, he blew his lid, and said that he was both Manager and HR, and no one should be complaining to anyone outside of the table. If they were going to complain to anyone, it should be him.
  
  • It turns out, Wayne has a prior history of being an asshole. Long before the Youtube channel, and the campaign, even before the previous campaign, he told his then group that they were playing the game wrong. He then found a new group, sang their praises to the old group, and then even brought both groups together to show the old group "the right way to play"
  • In addition to Wayne, he has two editors working for him. One of which he pays. The other one has had no compensation. The one not getting paid is doing the same work as both Wayne and the paid editor combined.
  • I mentioned way early on in the story that Ava was the Discord Administrator for the Discord server. After the Seth campaign incident, Wayne unceremoniously removed Ava as Administrator, told her it was "by mistake", and never put it back. As far as I can tell, there was nothing to warrant this other than control. I suspect it was because there were certain Seth campaign related channels or other channels he didn't want Ava to see.
  • The unceremonious removal of myself and Ava from the Youtube channel admin. Admittedly, we contributed very little to it, but it was removed without a word mentioned.
  • Recently making a post requiring his "talent" to purchase a minimum $5 dollar Patreon subscription. He has admitted to me the reasoning for this was to inflate Patreon subscriber numbers to entice new subscribers. He has since walked that back after much outcry from the "talent"
  • Asking Seth if it wouldn't be too much to convert his envisioned DnD campaign into a Daggerheart campaign, because Daggerheart is the new hotness, and will attract more viewers.

Ultimately, I suppose I feel disheartened and deceived. Deceived because I originally signed up for what I thought was going to be a bunch of friends sitting around and recording themselves playing quality DnD, and it has shifted so far from that original purpose. Wayne is obsessed over subscriber numbers and views, it's all he ever talks about. He claims that his goal is to reach a level of success to which all 10+ people involved will be able to achieve financial freedom (which he claims is roughly $2000 a month). I'm sure you've done the math, just like I have. Even if you believe $2k a month is financial freedom (I certainly don't), that comes out to $240,000 a year. That's an insane level of success to promise your players. Oh, I'm sorry, your "talent".
I feel disheartened because....there's actually good work being done here. Some of the players are some of the best I've ever played with. Wayne can actually be a good storyteller, when he's not pushing for likes or clicks. The editors do a really fantastic job. I have seen and listened to the work being done on the Seth campaign (luckily Wayne is only tangentially involved), and Seth's campaign is turning out to be something really special. There is something good being done here, but it seems so tainted by Wayne and his obsession for Youtube and Tiktok success. So, maybe this is an RPG Horror Story, maybe it's a cautionary tale. I dunno. I have committed to finishing out my run in the campaign, (I was brought back to the table multiple times because the players enjoy playing with me, and also I suspect I was involved in one of his highest viewed shorts), but my hearts not in it. I've told Wayne I've no interest in any of his future projects, and I wish him well on his Youtube journey. But in the pursuit of clicks, and likes, and subscribers, I feel like he has fundamentally lost what attracts people to actually watch and invest in TTRPG actual plays - authenticity.

Granddad died, shortly before he died he changed his will to leave everything to step gran (he was extremely ill, in all previous wills he left everything to his children) as well as transferring the house in his sole name for 20 years into a joint tenancy therefore leaving that to her too.
Now she's leaving everything to her own child who hasn't spoken to her in 30 years.