So for Context this was in my sophmore year in college which was about 2 years ago. I had a huge crush on this cute girl that I shared a class with, and my friends helped me to get the courage to introduce myself to her.
And I did, and she was really nice. And surprisingly she gave me her phone number, and we began to hang out to other events around campus, as well as helping each other with our biology homework.
After about 2 months, she asked if I wanted to go watch a movie with her, and I said I would. I believe it was uncharted with that actor that does Spiderman. Anyways, we were having a good time until we both leaned slowly together and we kissed. And it felt so amazing.
The bad thing was I peed myself when that happened, and she saw as well. I told her I had to go and quickly left. She texted me shortly after, saying that everything was fine, but I was just so embarrassed so I didn't respond for days.
I began skipping the biology class I had but since it was near the end of the semester it didn't affect my grades too bad. However, during another class a girl who I never met told me that she heard that I pissed myself while kissing her friend.
That's when I found out that she told her friends what had happened and now more people were finding out about what I did, which explained why I was getting so many weird looks but that just might be me exaggerating.
I texted her and told her that I needed to see her, and after confronting her she told me that she did tell only a couple of her friends, but they promised her that they wouldn't tell anyone.
That's when I told her straight up that I felt like we shouldn't be hanging out anymore, and that I hope she takes care.
She tried texting me a couple more times after that saying she was sorry, and she even found me on discord but I just ignored her. We had one more class the next semester, but I never spoke to her since.
My friends found out about this as well, and while they did tease me at first they were really supportive when they saw that I was really hurt about this. If it wasn't for them I don't know what I would've done.
TLDR: Went to a movie with my crush that I met in College, we kissed and accidentally pissed myself in front of her. I ended up running and she ended up telling her friends, causing me to break ties with her.

Welcome back to my running series of WWF PPV Reviews from a ‘blind’ perspective (I have no idea what’s going to happen; the results, the feuds or how good any of the matches will be). I have always heard stories of the attitude era and golden age but never watched it myself so I set myself to watching every single PPV event chronologically. I am also watching Wrestling Bios ‘reliving the war’ series to keep me updated inbetween the events with the feuds, and to get excited about upcoming matches.
Before I review the matches, based on the past few episodes of raw and last PPVs I’ll let you know, going into the event, which match I’m most excited for and which feud I’m most excited to see.
The match and feud I’m most excited to see is Shawn vs undertaker. I mean what needs to be said their feud is absolutely legendary, and with my favourite match of all time coming in the future between these two I cant wait to see how they perform together in these early years.
WWF In Your House - Ground Zero 1997 Match Ratings
Goldust vs Brian Pillman 2/5
Scott putski vs Brian Christopher 1/5
Savio vega vs Faarooq vs Crush 0.25/5
El torito vs Max Mini 1.5/5
Tag Fatal 4 way elimination match 1.75/5
The patriot vs Bret Hart 3.25/5
Shawn Michaels vs Undertaker 4.75/5
I cannot believe they pulled the “she’s my love child” story it’s so funny to look back on these storylines. Goldust and Pillman are set to fight and there’s a huge grudge for Goldust here so I’m hoping to see a physical bout.
Which it wasn’t… while it was a good bout with no botched or anything, and it was better than their Summerslam match. I saw pillman was limited due to an ankle problem he had, which is kinda weird with the amount of running around he did, but they still had a decent match. Honestly though this draw of this match was where the story was going and it definitely went 😂 Pillman managed to win the match by whacking Goldust with a brick concealed in marlenas bag, and literally drags marlena to his car where he drove off with her. Classic wwf is so hilarious.
The next match was the first time I’m seeing putski and Christopher wrestle and it was actually going well until that ending. I thought they pulled off some very clean looking spots but the crowd was completely dead for almost all of this match, especially after the match, just no one seemed to care. I didn’t really care for this Brian Christopher he was laughing like a clown or something, not even a figure of speech it was literally like a clown. He might’ve been trying to impersonate Lawler but it was just weird. I’m not sure if putski was actually injured or not it was pretty hard to tell but this match seemed like it was 3 or 4 minutes long of pretty dull action.
Going into the next match and honestly I’m pretty bored of these pointless gang wars but let’s see if it can deliver. Maybe rock will get involved and liven it up but all three competitors in this triple threat have yet to put on a good show during my journey through the new gen/attitude era. Also I feel like this is the first triple threat match I’ve seen since KOTR 1996 so there’s some level of excitement for me as it can make for a really entertaining match when done right.
I was surprised to see crush get a pop as I hadn’t heard one before when he made his entrance, but a big biker dude coming in on a massive Harley will get an American crowd going I suppose 😂. But oh man once the match got going there was actually boos going throughout the stadium for the last 1/3 of it. They were trying some weird thing where they played on the fact that they both used to be part of the NOD in which they’d team with farooq on sadio vega but oh my lord it didn’t work at all, it just came off like they had no idea what they were doing. There were no highlights at all, and the last 5 minutes was crush throwing vega out the ring to use moves solo on farooq to which he’d come back in the ring, break the pin and repeat the process. Then he randomly wants to team with crush after all that?? It made no sense at all and was just a bad match, the crowd wasn’t into it and booed during quite a bit of the match, big miss.
I’m just gunna call it a ‘mini-match’ and I’m sure you’ll know what I’m talking about but it ended up being entertaining for what it was in all fairness, much better than the match I’d just seen anyway. It was more of a funny performance than a match; they both end up biting everyone’s asses? Including the referee, and mini goes and steals lawyers crown too. El torito is bloody nuts, his character is basically to act like a bull so he chases refs and officials around trying to headbutt them, fu**ing nuts 😂. I do think it went on a little too long though, if they’re going to book this kind of match then it should be short and sweet filler rather than dragging it on. There was however a pretty good looking springboard move close to the end so that was cool. There were some impressive moves and the crowd was getting involved but It’s just some filler while the show gets going in the end.
Very good idea having dude love and Austin come out inbetween the matches to relinquish the titles as this crowd REALLY needed some livening up after the past hour of the show. And when Steve starts his promo the crowd eats up every second of it and it’s no surprise because he kills it as usual, what a breath of fresh air SCSA is in the WWF during this era. He’s throwing insults to Vince, to the sergeant to JR and it’s f***ing brilliant. It’s cool seeing dude love backing him up as well I think they actually make a really cool looking tag team. And then out of god damn nowhere he delivers a stunner to JR and the crowd absolutely loses it. I would say at this point he is truly the face of the WWF and it really does suck that he suffered that neck injury and couldn’t wrestle properly for a while, having to change his entire wrestling style because of it, but it was never to his detriment, we’re truly in the stone cold era now.
Before the fatal four way, while the LOD get interviewed I couldn’t help but notice how young Michael Cole looks, I mean obviously it’s over 25 years ago but still cool seeing how long he’s been involved.
I really don’t understand these fatal four way tag matches, they always come off weirdly as you can have two people from the same team in the ring that have to wrestle… but it makes no sense because why not just tag someone else in? I don’t know it’s a weird dynamic and I’m not surprised they dropped this type of match in the future.
It’s a shame LOD was the first to be eliminated because they randomly started beating the godwinns with a metal bucket? It makes 0 sense for them to blindly DQ themselves from getting the tag titles since they were crowd favourites, but okay you do you Vince. I wanted them to win too. I know a few people don’t care for LOD but they’re top 2 tag teams in the wwf right now beside Owen and bulldog. The godwinns get eliminated next (thank god), and they just feel like the most filler tag team I’ve ever seen they’re SOOO bland and basic, they don’t even play up to their hillbilly characters anymore which is a new level of bad I won’t lie. I was really REALLY surprised that headbangers took away the belts though, with the massive push of the hart foundation I thought it was a no brainer. It was awesome seeing Austin come in and disrupt the match, he absolutely brings the whole arena completely alive whenever he does anything. Overall though the match was bad and it went on far too long even with four teams. I think the ending was pretty fun but that was only about 2 minutes of the match that was entertaining the rest just felt veryyyy slow.
Man this event has really gotta pull out some f***ing 5/5 main events for it to be worth watching because we’re 1 hour 45 minutes in without a match over 2/5 at most.
When I hear Kurt angles theme playing I was so happy, excited, confused, and then disappointed when I realised it was 3 or 4 years too early. I had no idea they kept this theme and used it for Kurt angle as well as patriot.
I have a small inkling that Bret hart didn’t perform as well as he could’ve in this match because he was annoyed about Shawn getting the top spot after everything that’s gone down and him working more regularly recently than Shawn. Patriot wasn’t a bad wrestler but his character was extremely bland, what would happen after this feud? He’d just be a guy that’s proud to be from America that looks like a Mexican wrestler… in the time of big characters making the main events he unfortunately doesn’t really fit in that well. His in ring ability was good though, no botches or anything but I just couldn’t really feel myself getting into this match. I didn’t really know if they’d book patriot in to take the wwf title as I was pretty sure they wouldn’t want hart to lose his title being such a huge name in the business right now. It was pretty fun when Vader and bulldog came out for some extra drama with them interfering with each of the wrestlers but it’s not a good sign when a match needs drama like that to elevate it. It’s better than what we’ve seen tonight but not particularly worth watching. If you love Bret hart give it a watch as he was his usual fantastic in ring performer but it’s not one of his best for sure. The crowd was really into it, making the hard camera shake chanting “USA USA”, so that was cool, but I’m not entirely sure if it’s because of the crowd or because it was such a small venue. Also worth noting Bret hart is a perfect heel character, he’s a massive star with a character that works perfectly as a heel because he sprinkles some IRL elements into everything he does. The move of breaking the American flag pole and the strangling patriot with the flag is just brilliant, makes it that extra bit more believable and I love it, Americans however must’ve hated it!
Shawn Michaels entrance was so hilarious, he gets hit by a… idk what that even was, a brown cabbage? He makes BJ notions to the crowd, his pyro doesn’t go off properly in the ring like it usually does, and he still pulled it off because he’s HBK, fantastic. This FEELS like main event material though and I’m really excited for it. Sometimes main events don’t really build up properly and just haven’t got that hype behind it but this match should be great. The first of many times we’d see these legends in the ring together.
Starting off the match right too with undertaker taking out the referee and allowing undertaker to take it to the outside and absolutely lay into Michael’s without a count out. I absolutely loved Shawn’s selling during this match too, it’s so over the top that it’s brilliant, with one of his famous vertical presses while he gets kicked in the belly whilst in the corner, love it. Him begging to the ref to dq undertaker, trying to escape through the door of the set and banging on the door, it all works really well and he plays up undertakers character perfectly. I hate when wrestlers forget they’re supposed to play up this undertaker being very scary it really takes away immersion but Shawn does it perfectly. The boos for undertaker seem to be from the women only and the cheers for Shawn seem to be from the women only, of course 😂. I also love seeing the origins of d generation x, one of my all time favourite tag teams as I’m sure is the same with everyone else. HHH makes his way down to the ring with a referee to replace the numerous ones that have been taken out during this match, and they are just the perfect team together I love it.
The actual match I thought was really really fun. It was absolute chaos and maybe not a wrestling masterclass but you can’t deny it was fun. From start to finish we go through 3 referees, we get strangling with power chords, we get triple H and HBK telling the crowd to suck it, and an amazing back and forth showcase from Michael’s and undertaker. I think this match did an absolutely fantastic job and reinstating the undertaker as the most intimidating wrestler in the wwf. The poor referees during this match though, they got absolutely abused. The only thing I didn’t like about this match was the ending. Another random referee comes to the ring to end the match as a DQ, which is a really stupid ending because illegal stuff had already happened when the other referees came to the ring so why wouldn’t they have ended it then? The action continues after the match with undertaker almost soloing Michael’s and HHH. More officials come to the ring as Michael’s beats the hell out of them. And then other wrestlers are forced to come to the ring to try and break the two up which was awesome to see. This really sets up further matches between the two, and I think that’s was the whole idea of the match which worked well, it’s just that I hate these random DQ endings to main events. We see the undertaker flying over the top rope for… I think the first time? Correct me if I’m wrong but I’m pretty sure that’s the first time I’ve seen it in this era which was of course AWESOME!! Overall a really fun match that sets up for further main events but it’s held back by its weird and stupid decision. It’s still well worth a watch if you enjoy this feud however.
Overall, whilst the main event hit all the right places for me I just don’t think the WWF was ready for a 3 hour event yet. They simply didn’t have the roster for it to be enjoyable and so many of these matches went way longer than they had any business doing. I think Bret hart is always gunna deliver so he was fun to watch but it just want one of his best but the main event hit in every single way apart from the finish which I understand is setting up for further matches but ughhhh it was done weirdly and poorly. If you’re gunna watch this event, skip everything but the main event it’s just not worth sitting through everything else.
Overall rating 2.75/5

The Truth is an anthology of nearly 200 episodes spanning a wide variety of genres. It billed itself as movies for the ears, and it certainly lived up to that description. Now, it is true that quite a few audio dramas fit that description, but you have to consider the context that The Truth occurred in. The first episode of The Truth premiered way back in 2011. The indie audio drama community was still very much in its infancy. Fiction podcasts tended to be short story readings like StarShipSofa or Lightspeed Magazine. If you were lucky, you might get something like The Drabblecast, with music and sound-effects added to the mix. The Truth was a full-cast show, performed rather than read, and with immersive sound-effects and music.
The Truth was an anthology in the purest sense of the word. Each episode was a new present to unwrap. It spanned multiple genres and styles. The early years did tend to be a bit more experimental in terms of material. I had the opportunity to chat with series creator Jonathan Mitchell. Jonathan described these early episodes as scenes rather than stories. True, they are certainly shorter than later episodes, but that’s hardly a bad thing. Each of them was like a snapshot into a different life, and they were certainly memorable snapshots. I’m not the only one who is of this opinion. Many episodes from this era of The Truth were featured on various programs such as All Things Considered, Weekend America, Planet Money, This American Life, and Studio 360. Eventually, the need to pay the bills came knocking. So, the episodes began to favor longer stories in order to provide more space for ad breaks. Now, some people say this was the era when The Truth went into decline. Personally, I strongly disagree. There were still many quality episodes being produced.
The real decline, ironically, was around the time The Truth celebrated its tenth anniversary. Well, maybe not entirely ironically. I have noticed that many anthology podcasts tend to start going stale around the ten year mark. It was at this point the misses started to outnumber the hit. Now, to be fair, there were still a few diamonds in the rough. That being said, it was clear that the writers’ well of inspiration was starting to run dry. The episodes also increasingly had the same feel to them. The decline of The Truth didn’t come with a bang, but with a whimper.
It is certainly sad that the curtain has finally fallen on The Truth. No show can last forever. Eventually, if you smolder well past your time, you will see a steady decline in quality. In the immortal words of Harvey Dent, you either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain. I certainly hope that The Truth is always remember for what it was, rather than the decline it saw during its final season.
And that, my friends, is what this review is all about. We are going to celebrate The Truth in all its myriad ways. From those early “snapshots of a life” episodes, to the more full-length episodes. We will also look at a few less than stellar episodes. They can make for a good teaching moment about what not to do.
This is merely part one. I’ll be making a part two, so be on the lookout for that in the near future. I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s part three eventually.
But I wanted to start off with a good solid foundation. To that end, I reviewed the episodes “Moon Graffiti”, “Eat Cake”, “That’s Democracy”, “Do You Have a Minute for Equality”, “Brain Chemistry”, “Fish Girl”, and “Mall Santa.”
Like I said, this just the start. More to come in the future.
Have you listened to The Truth? If so, what did you think?
Link to the full review is over here: http://drakoniandgriffalco.blogspot.com/2024/05/the-audio-file-truth-part-1.html?m=0

In this clip CEO of Nvidia presents a country's language, culture, and intelligence as a resource they cannot afford not to exploit. This immediately brings to mind Martin Heidegger's 1954 essay The Question Concerning Technology wherein modern technology is described as a framework that transforms our way of understanding things away from a stand-alone essence and into an instrumental, standing-reserve of a resource.
In this post I'll articulate why I think the Nvidia CEO is saying something monstrous and awful by leaning on Heidegger's understanding of Technology. I will primarily make use of a critical distinction he makes in the relationship between humans and nature, which is bringing-forth and challenging-forth. I will summarize some key concepts form the essay so you don't have to read it in full.
The primary distinction between bringing-forth and challenging-forth is whether the essence (or if you prefer, identity or understanding) of some thing remains as a stand-alone existence unto itself or if it is subsumed under the essence of the process that extracts a resource from it.
Bringing-Forth is likened to an old wooden bridge across the Rhine river. The bridge is revealed as a way forward, as a space and a road and an object, but not in a manner that the Rhine is now subsumed under it. The Rhine is not reduced (in our understanding) to the waters that go under the bridge, the bridge brings-forth a way across the river, but the Rhine is still, in essence, still understood as a thing unto itself, independent from any need that water run under the bridge.
By contrast, Heidegger brings up a hydroelectric dam on the Rhine.

"The hydroelectric plant is set into the current of the Rhine. It sets the Rhine to supplying its hydraulic pressure, which then sets the turbines turning. This turning sets those machines in motion whose thrust sets going the electric current for which the long-distance power station and its network of cables are set up to dispatch electricity. In the context of the interlocking processes pertaining to the orderly disposition of electrical energy, even the Rhine itself appears to be something at our command. The hydroelectric plant is not built into the Rhine River as was the old wooden bridge that joined bank with bank for hundreds of years. Rather, the river is dammed up into the power plant."

To Heidegger, it is not just the physical flow of water in the river that is dammed and disrupted, but rather our understanding of the river is dammed. We are no longer seeing it for itself but rather as something within our control, something from which we can challenge-forth to give "maximum yield at the minimum expense". The Rhine is now the smaller part to a process whose essence has overtaken the essence of any one part.
In order to enable this process to continue Heidegger says that "Everywhere everything is ordered to stand by, to be immediately on hand, indeed to stand there just so that it may be on call for a further ordering." The dam is our order to the Rhine that the gravitational energy of the cubic meters of water that it has stand by for future use, in a manner that the bridge does not order the Rhine to flow underneath it.
This quote from Ayn Rand's Fountainhead neatly encapsulates how challenging-forth encourages the framing of the world:

"He looked at the granite. To be cut, he thought, and made into walls. He looked at a tree. To be split and made into rafters. He looked at a streak of rust on the stone and thought of iron ore under the ground. To be melted and to emerge as girders against the sky. These rocks, he thought, are waiting for me; waiting for the drill, the dynamite and my voice; waiting to be split, ripped, pounded, reborn; waiting for the shape my hands will give them"

Rand is (expectedly) writing in praises of this framework, but to the view of Heidegger, this is monstrous thing, the tree and the granite and the rocks are all robbed of an essence, an understanding of themselves as they are and transformed into something that must be ordered around to stand by for an endless process of revealing, regulating, and securing.
What then, does this have to do with the Nvidia CEO's claim? Well, quite clearly, AI has made it possible for people to issue the order of standing-reserve not just to the forces of nature, but to things inside ourselves, such as language, culture, intelligence. These things, that embody the inner lives of people, our relationships, and our histories, are challenged-forth.
The writer brings-forth something from language, she cannot hope to control language, merely to reveal some finite thing from it in the manner that the bridge revelas away forward from the Rhine. She cannot order language to be "immediately on hand" to be endlessly revealed into something whenever desired. She understands language as something with an essence that she cannot wield in its totality and in that relationship the essence of language is preserved, as something greater than her desires to make writing from it, but nonetheless able to yield to her enough for her needs.
This here is what distinguishes AI from other tools that relate to language, culture and intelligence. AI finally enables us to treat the great corpuses as a standing reserve we can challenge-forth and industrialize, that we can subsume those things permanently under the endless cycle of revealing. If our language, thought and intelligence are a river, AI is the dam. The river still flows, but it is subsumed as the resource from which the dam extracts something, as the thing the dam challenges to produce.
Like Heidegger, I see a certain monstrosity in this, and it is especially awful when it invades this realms of the inner lives of people.
Heidegger argued that man was the first resource to be ordered in this manner:

"Only to the extent that man for his part is already challenged to exploit the energies of nature can this revealing that orders happen. If man is challenged, ordered, to do this, then does not man himself belong even more originally than nature within the standing-reserve? The current talk about human resources, about the supply of patients for a clinic, gives evidence of this. The forester who measures the felled timber in the woods and who to all appearances walks the forest path in the same way his grandfather did is today ordered by the industry that produces commercial woods, whether he knows it or not. He is made subordinate to the orderability of cellulose, which for its part is challenged forth by the need for paper, which is then delivered to newspapers and illustrated magazines."

But indeed, with the ability to challenge-forth culture and language and intelligenve, man is made infinitely and completely subordinate to industry. And that, I think, we should never allow.

I first watched Gossip Girl when I was 15 years old in 2020 during lockdown, and I really enjoyed the show and I still really do but now that I am rewatching Gossip Girl as a 19 year old out of high school, I thought it would be fun to share my thoughts and compare them to the thoughts I had at 15, considering I made a post to the sub then as well!

• I remember saying that Jenny was my favorite character in the show and I will stand by that opinion that she is definitely top 2 for me as she and Blair alternate depending on the season. I wish that Jenny had been given a better exit, but I understand Taylor Momsen was ready to leave. However, I think that the Blair and Jenny dynamic was some of the best material that the show ever gave us! I think the two of them were so fascinating together and the actresses worked off of each other well.
• I remember saying that I really didn't like Serena the first time around. That opinion has changed a little bit as I forgot how interesting of a character she was in season 1 and how much mystery was surrounding her character! She was really intriguing. I think there were a lot of things that could have been delved into like her partying habits, drug addiction, or her Queen S storyline. Again, I think she suffers from not getting written very well, but I don't by any means hate her anymore. I also think at least in the first few seasons Blake Lively did a good job!
• In my 2020 post, I said that I LOVED the Chuck and Nate friendship and now I do NOT understand at all what I was talking about. That friendship was so superficial and one of my favorite friendships of the series was Dan and Nate. That friendship was actually extremely healthy (for Gossip Girl standards) and I thought Penn Badgley and Chace Crawford had a lot better of a dynamic than both of them did with Ed Westwick. I wish that the Dan and Nate friendship had gotten more screentime because I really do like it a lot and think that to offset the frenemy relationships of Blai Serena and Blai Jenny, Dan and Nate remaining true friends throughout the show could have been really nice to see. Speaking about Dan that leads me to my next contradiction...
• I said in 2020 that I hated Dan and thought he was my least favorite character and that is also not true anymore! I think in seasons 1-3 Dan was actually a really good character! Even though he was judgmental and a bit high and mighty I thought that those were flaws that worked for his character. I think in the back half of the show is where Dan starts to go down hill when he starts releasing things like the book and when he is eventually released as GG. But I think in those first 3 seasons he was actually a pretty good character and I would rank Penn Badgley as one of the better actors in the series! It thought he was really good!
• I remember saying that was a Chuck fan. Nope. Not anymore. I can acknowledge that the SA incidents with Jenny and Serena were basically retconned after the pilot, but even after that episode he does some things that I just can't stand by. Selling Blair for his hotel, punching his hand through the window, like I don't know, he's just really not my cup of tea.
• Surprise Surprise! I don't hate Vanessa in the first couple seasons. I really enjoyed her budding friendship with Serena at the beginning I LOVED her relationship with Nate and I think if they had kept her written in the way that she was written in the first two seasons then she wouldn't be nearly as hated as she is! I even thought that there was some interesting things being played with when they put her with Chuck briefly. Also Jessica Szohr is a beautiful women and it really annoyed me that she kept getting the short end of the stick with fashion and hair on the show, but that's a conversation for another day.
• I think that the show definitely went downhill especially after Jenny's exit in season 4. I think that the Juliet storyline was the last really good storyline that the show had. But on my rewatch I noticed that there were characters like Raina, Damien, Carter, Nelly, Penelope that could have been upgraded to regulars to keep things more interesting and to create new dynamics without writing new characters like Ivy, Lola, or Sage. I forgot how MESSY Damien is and how much drama he caused, so I can't quite understand why they would offer Kevin Zegers a full time contract and keep him around to stir the pot more. Also Raina had good dynamics with Nate and Chuck and was starting to develop relationships with Serena and Blair too. That would have been nice to develop, they could have kept her. Also it would have been really interesting to see how Penelope and Nelly's relationships with Blair would evolve after HS and how they would feel about her. Bringing Nelly, Penelope, and Raina into the forefront more also would have solved some of the diversity problems I have with the show.

All and all I think that the first season is still really good and I am a big fan of season 2 as well! I think that there were some issues when it started getting to season 3 and onwards but I think that seasons 1-4 are a really fun and campy show! I definitely don't hate as many characters as I used to which is interesting, I thought it would be the opposite haha. But I still think with some changes the show could have been even better and reached even higher levels!

Am I wrong for soft ghosting one of my “friends”?
Wow, this one might me a long one.
So I moved to (undisclosed location) sometime in the beginning of last year. When I moved here I really had no friends but became heavily involved in this yoga studio I went to and slowly but surely started to make friends/acquaintances with the teacher that instructed me.
From afar she seemed super cool and I became pretty enthralled with her and her life. I would look forward so heavily to going to her classes every week and was quite intrigued by her. I thought she was funny, bubbly, spunky, cool, and always made jokes during class that made me laugh. As months went by I found myself wanting to get closer and closer to her, and she even invited me out one time to one of her “events” she was hosting. Here’s the thing;
It seemed like we had a lot in common and was just generally craving camaraderie and connection. I felt a sense of belonging with her and wanted to expand that energy in my life, and wanted to do anything I could to get closer to her for those reasons. But I guess this is where we have the first red flag;
One day after class, she extended an invitation to me to a meet up of sorts, (I’m being sparing with details just out of fear she might read this) and when she invited me it seemed like it was gonna be this big thing with lots of people invited, and just in general in talking to her it seemed as if she was very well connected and respected within her community, had lots of friends and connects, and I thought this was gonna be a huge thing that I was even lucky to be invited to. I was super stoked and exited about it.
However when the day of the event came, I was super tired and slow to getting up that morning. I figured I would just make my way over whenever I could since it seemed causal and like you could drop in whenever. I also figured there would be more than enough people that no one would really even notice my arrival or departure. (Plus, sometimes it’s chic to be fashionably late ;) ). Well…. I was most definitely wrong.
When I showed up I heard someone excitedly shout my name, which was her, and she waved me down to the “meet up”…. There was literally only one person there and it had been going on for 2+ hours. I was definitely a bit unnerved, but also didn’t want to be rude, and like I said I was just kind of happy to be there and be getting invited to things. But it was kinda like, damn…. Are these all the friends you have?
I had dressed up and looked cute but they were just kind of wearing whatever and I felt awkward and overdressed and also embarrassed now that I was even this late because it was clearly much more intimate than I expected and my arrival/absence was DEFINITELY felt. We had chatted a bit and that was cool but then I remember her confessing me that she had cried to her husband earlier that morning that she was scared nobody was going to show up and how thrilled she was that not only one, but TWO people had showed up and that it felt like she had friends. I wasn’t really sure what to say or make of that.
She also…. The whole time (and mind you, this is our first legitimate interaction out of yoga class) just kind of kept talking maniacally AT me, not to me, and was coming off almost even manic, and she had formed a white crust of spit around her mouth probably from talking so much that I couldn’t look away from. To say the least, I was a bit disturbed coming away from this interaction but I just kept telling myself that I was being too judgmental of her and to give it a chance and that maybe she was just hyper that day and that I had probably had unintentional embarrassing hygiene moments as well. So I keep going to class and that’s that.
There were several other red flag moments between this first interaction and the next one, mostly just her incredibly cringey social media presence that I genuinely almost couldn’t stand to see without feeling like I was withering away inside, but maybe I’ll save that for later. It’s almost like I couldn’t just see that the person I thought was so cool in class and the person I was seeing her be online and outside of class were the same people. But I digress.
She had actually ended up inviting me to go with her on one of her international yoga retreats, and I was actually very excited about this. I had very little time with her in between classes, and my attraction (but also repulsion) with her was growing stronger and I wanted to figure her out and see what she was really about and what the pull I was feeling towards her was about. Plus, I love travelling and just thought it would be fun.
I had a pretty good time, but we didn’t get to talk much, HOWEVER, I do remember this distinct point during the trip where it was myself, 2-3 other fiends I had made, her brother, and her “best friend” who had happened to be her brother’s Gf in a room together, talking. the brother, the best friend, and the other friend I made just all completely started talking shit about her and I was so confused.
I felt super hurt by this actually, bc I felt like I had a inexplicable bond with the teacher who had invited me, she was the reason we were all there in that beautiful place, and I just couldn’t understand why they were choosing to be so negative about someone I thought they had claimed (at least by title) to love. They would say things like “I can’t fucking stand your sister” (one of the friends I made to the brother) and everyone would just sigh and put their hands in their head and be like “I know…. I know. It’s a lot. She’s a lot”. And I didn’t have anything to add to the conversation because I was just so confused and I knew the girl would just be so upset if she heard them saying this. Anyway… that confusion stuck with me for a while after.
Fast forward maybe a month or two, I started hanging out with her more regularly myself outside of class. I would say this is when we became more “friends”. She would invite me to other teachers classes and we would talk a lot about our lives.
I learned how she felt about her close friend and family connections, and how she often felt hurt and betrayed by people close to her and how some of her friends were actually really shady. I just got a general sense of her feeling scapegoated and libeled against by ppl that got close to her and how she had walls up for that reason.
She also shared to me that most of her family was cut off, with the exception of her brother who she had recently rekindled a connection with, hence why he was on that trip. I felt very bad for her and wanted to be a source of comfort and support, and she would often comment on how she felt a sense of camaraderie with me since I also (LITERALLY) had no family and how we have to make our chosen family. This was a sweet sentiment, for sure, but I was still sussing out how I felt about her.
So one day, a mutual friend that had been on the trip with us was having a birthday party and I guess that she was invited to it, too. She sat down next to me and I was SUPER excited to see her as I was craving her energy and hadn’t seen her in some time. But then… idk. She had had a lot to drink. I’m fully aware that she’s kind of a quirky individual, and has a way of socializing which I can sometimes find a bit uncomfortable or even intense, (like the first meetup I spoke of) but this time it was even more and seemed to be heightened by the drinking.
Her husband was sitting on her other side and kept trying to interject and insinuate that maybe she was doing a bit much, but I think she was drunk enough to the point that she just found it funny and had no awareness of how she was coming off. There’s not even a way I can describe it really, but she just seemed a bit obsessive over me and kept making jokes that were literally not funny and seemed to have lost all ability to read the room. I also had noticed that she had only had TWO beers and was acting like this already which I found… really strange.
So at some point she goes to the bathroom, and I also get in line for the bathroom about 5 mins later. When I get up to the bathroom, she’s still in there, and there’s a line of about 2 or 3 people ahead of me. When she exits the bathroom she immediately spots me and rushes up to me and just starts… drunkenly spewing.
I can’t even remember what she was saying, but we were in a pretty high class establishment and I remember her gushing over me and was saying “I just want to let you know that I don’t really have friends or let people close to me in my circle but I just want to let you know that YOU are officially in my circle and you have earned friend status to me and I’ve let you in my circle…” or something like that. And I just kept thinking, who tf even says that??? I’m pretty sure the last time I checked that friendship is a two way street and it’s not just a title we bestow onto some “lucky” person and that’s that. Like girl… let ME decide if I want to be friends too first.
It was partially that, and also the way she was drunkenly spewing was so awkward and embarrassing bc I could tell all the other women in line were like who tf is this bitch and why is she saying all this weird stuff and like, does she even know you?? Lol. Just a very odd interaction which again, I kind of wrote off, but the unsettling feeling kind of just kept growing after that point.
Then, the time that I REALLY knew something was up came up about a month later, but there are still some key details of this story that are missing. Perhaps I will discuss them later.
SO. About a month later, she invited me last minute to this concert of sorts. When I got there, I was super excited to be there, the vibes were amazing and we were having so much fun. But she had definitely had a lot, A LOT to drink. I didn’t mind at first, because everyone there seemed severely under the influence, but she would just start randomly kind of lashing out at people in the crowd and she thought it was funny? She first loudly and audibly started making fun of some guys shoes in front of us, and was trying to laugh with me as if I would join in, but when his girl friend turned around and shot her a dirty look, she had the nerve to be self conscious and mad about it. She would loudly poke fun at other people in the crowd too, but not in a ha-ha way, just in a straight up mean and asshole way and I could not understand why she would even do that or why she thought that was funny.
Again, I kind of just awkwardly laughed and brushed it off. But when all was said and done and the concert was closing, she enthusiastically invited me back to go to her house and soak in her hot tub. I kept saying are you sure?? But she was like please, PLEASE come, we have weed, we’ll smoke you out and other things and I wanted to continue the vibes because it sounded fun. And then….. completely downhill.
I had arrived back at their place before she did, but as soon as I saw them go in I knocked. When I walked in, she was pale faced up on the floor, non verbal, pretty much motionless, and staring at the ceiling. I was like oh no… it seemed like she got a bit too much to drink. I waited patiently there for a few mins, unsure of what to do as I had just drove for 45 mins and I was still 25 mins in the opposite direction away from home.
I kind of just sat around, and hoped that she would sober up. I asked if she was drunk… she said no. She ran to her bathroom multiple times while her husband (a complete socially awkward case himself) tried to take care of her while she threw up. I asked her if she puked and she also said no. So I didn’t really know what to do. I was trying to offer support/ empathy but she just kept denying any claims of anything being amiss. Her husband left to pick up a pizza and I probably just should’ve left but I’m telling you I had no idea how to exit their house without making it weird or awkward. And I also was hungry. So I just stayed… and waited for the pizza.
What happened in those 20-30 mins, I don’t even know if I can fully explain. She just became… so FUCKING WEIRD. she clearly was embarrassed that I was seeing her drunk, and I think was trying to over compensate. But she just turned into an absolute freak show and I’ve never been more uncomfortable in my life.
She started hoola hooping in my face, and making these weird gremlin faces and noises at me, fell to the floor, rolled round on the floor while continuing to make the noises, convulsed on the floor, but tried to do it in a funny way, tried to make an interpretive dance for me… I’ve truly never experienced something so uncomfortable in my life. I probably do sound like an asshole, but I swear you would just have to be there to see how a) gross and b) weird and actually scary it was. I was genuinely frightened.
I’ve never seen anyone act like that and I didn’t want to make her more uncomfortable or weird by showing her how clearly uncomfortable I actually was. so I just sat there and tried to laugh. But it probably came off as more of a grimace. And for the record, this woman is 33. I am 26. It was just. Obscene.
And she’s tried to act like and say multiple times that she’s like my “big sister”. Now I’ve seen a lot of drunk behavior, but not this. I wolfed down my pizza, and so did she, and she started to get even more philosophical and weird on me, showing me songs and art which were quite frankly some of the worst things I’ve ever heard in my life, and I left as soon as I could.
I was so shaken and disturbed coming away from this, because like I said earlier, I thought she was a cool girl, but honestly her behavior and lack of control over herself completely terrified me. And it’s not like she was drinking liquor, it was just damn IPAs. And I just did not know what to do.
Some details I will try to add to this story, even though I know it’s monolithic at this point , is that 2 months prior to this she had gotten fired from the studio she worked at.
She had a mental breakdown during class because the manager was being mean to her, and he fired her on the spot. I remember being so angry with the owner, (honestly he IS a piece of shit human being) but I thought he was being sexist by calling her mentally unstable and I thought the way he handled things was unfair.
I went so far as to boycott the studio and completely remove myself from it in support of her and followed her to her new one. After the drunk #2 incident, I didn’t hang out with her very much, and only saw her during her class as I was locked into a certain number of classes I had paid for.
I remember her telling me that she had just started at ANOTHER studio, and got fired 3 days after on her birthday and she was talking about how unfair it was and how much of an asshole that new girl was for firing her… and I believed her. AGAIN.
I went so far as to block that girl on Instagram too, but deep down I kind of knew that she had probably just been fired bc let’s face it… as I was starting to discover, she WAS a lot. and the studio was in an upper class area , catered towards more upper echelon people, and I just don’t think she was fitting that image. I lent her an empathetic ear, because that’s all I would want in that situation.
But where she fucked up was sending me screenshot proof of the text exchange between her and that girl, thinking I would take her side, and later sending me screenshots of another conversation she had with the OTHER manager. She told me that this new girl fired her for bringing her husband to class. In my mind I was like, oh no, is she racist!?! Because her husband was black. But no, that’s not what I read at all.
It was the most reasonable, level headed response to someone ever, and laid out multiple offenses and reasons she didn’t want her at the studio. The reasons were honestly so embarrassing that I don’t know why she would send it to me and think I would side with her. She recently also sent me messages with the other boss and the last thing he says to her is “I hope you get help for your mental illness because whatever you have is serious and will impact all your relationships and business and things that you do”. And honestly I can now say in retrospect that those were the truest words ever spoken.
When I read these texts, I had a look back at my whole relationship with and how she would always paint everyone else to be the villain and how everyone is so mean to HER… and the whole time the common denominator was her. It was always her. And it made me rethink everything.
I’ve even had extensive conversations with some of the other people on her trip that were talking shit and couldn’t stand her and they all told me the same things. How it seemed like she was the coolest person ever and had her shit together and seemed like she was going places… but deep down she was just an absolute mess and pushed everyone away from her. And I no longer felt like I was going crazy.
But like I said, she formed a really close bond with me (I think from her perspective) and said she felt like my big sister and family, and shared all these stories about her feeling isolated and shut out by people, but now here I am, doing the exact same thing to her. Icing her out of my life. And I just wanna ask you guys…
Am the asshole?

ABYG if I alr want to break-up with my bf who keeps on liking girls pics on ig? my bf & I (both 21) are in a relationship for a year na. in the early months, napansin kong andami talaga niyang nila-like na pics ng half-naked girls sa ig so I communicated it to him, then he said sorry naman na & things na keeps on saying things normal lang lang daw, hindi niya napapansin kung sino mga nila-like niya which I find 🤷❓ pero as a sobrang mapagmahal na gurlie, pinatawad ko naman kasi he's going to change his ways naman na raw (which he did!) but not for a long time kasi nung chineck ko nanaman recently 'yung followings and likes niya, andami nanamang babae 💀 it makes me feel insecure :( abyg if ganto nararamdaman ko? idk what to do rn fr kasi napapagod na ako mag-communicate kasi parang hindi naman ako pinapakinggan, walang nangyayari. I feel so invalidated. pls guys lmk your thoughts huhu if it's a me problem, I'm very much willing to change naman 😞 gimme tips

The Truth is an anthology of nearly 200 episodes spanning a wide variety of genres. It billed itself as movies for the ears, and it certainly lived up to that description. Now, it is true that quite a few audio dramas fit that description, but you have to consider the context that The Truth occurred in. The first episode of The Truth premiered way back in 2011. The indie audio drama community was still very much in its infancy. Fiction podcasts tended to be short story readings like StarShipSofa or Lightspeed Magazine. If you were lucky, you might get something like The Drabblecast, with music and sound-effects added to the mix. The Truth was a full-cast show, performed rather than read, and with immersive sound-effects and music.
The Truth was an anthology in the purest sense of the word. Each episode was a new present to unwrap. It spanned multiple genres and styles. The early years did tend to be a bit more experimental in terms of material. I had the opportunity to chat with series creator Jonathan Mitchell. Jonathan described these early episodes as scenes rather than stories. True, they are certainly shorter than later episodes, but that’s hardly a bad thing. Each of them was like a snapshot into a different life, and they were certainly memorable snapshots. I’m not the only one who is of this opinion. Many episodes from this era of The Truth were featured on various programs such as All Things Considered, Weekend America, Planet Money, This American Life, and Studio 360. Eventually, the need to pay the bills came knocking. So, the episodes began to favor longer stories in order to provide more space for ad breaks. Now, some people say this was the era when The Truth went into decline. Personally, I strongly disagree. There were still many quality episodes being produced.
The real decline, ironically, was around the time The Truth celebrated its tenth anniversary. Well, maybe not entirely ironically. I have noticed that many anthology podcasts tend to start going stale around the ten year mark. It was at this point the misses started to outnumber the hit. Now, to be fair, there were still a few diamonds in the rough. That being said, it was clear that the writers’ well of inspiration was starting to run dry. The episodes also increasingly had the same feel to them. The decline of The Truth didn’t come with a bang, but with a whimper.
It is certainly sad that the curtain has finally fallen on The Truth. No show can last forever. Eventually, if you smolder well past your time, you will see a steady decline in quality. In the immortal words of Harvey Dent, you either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain. I certainly hope that The Truth is always remember for what it was, rather than the decline it saw during its final season.
And that, my friends, is what this review is all about. We are going to celebrate The Truth in all its myriad ways. From those early “snapshots of a life” episodes, to the more full-length episodes. We will also look at a few less than stellar episodes. They can make for a good teaching moment about what not to do.
This is merely part one. I’ll be making a part two, so be on the lookout for that in the near future. I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s part three eventually.
But I wanted to start off with a good solid foundation. To that end, I reviewed the episodes “Moon Graffiti”, “Eat Cake”, “That’s Democracy”, “Do You Have a Minute for Equality”, “Brain Chemistry”, “Fish Girl”, and “Mall Santa.”
Like I said, this just the start. More to come in the future.
Have you listened to The Truth? If so, what did you think?
Link to the full review is over here: http://drakoniandgriffalco.blogspot.com/2024/05/the-audio-file-truth-part-1.html?m=0

HIII my name is Sea! (Online name) I am going to share my experience with Narcissists. Narcissism is when someone is obsessed with themself and they act like the world is ‘revolving around them.’ I once had a friend who was a narcissist without KNOWING she was one. I don’t want to shit talk, or go into detail about her.. But it all kind of started in 3rd-4th grade.

• When I first met this girl, I was in Denver. I was almost done with 3rd grade and would go into 4th grade but I moved. Before I moved, Let’s just say this girl’s name is “Simpson.” Simpson would tell me to tell the teachers that I want to (TW) : jump off the bridge. Then, I did what she said bcz I was naive at the time. I was sent to the principal’s office that day.
  
• Ever since then, I realized that my so-called friend Simpson only cared about herself. She never emailed, texted or called me back that day. She spread rumors about me and others and thought she was more superior. I don’t think that she is, I know that she is a huge selfish.. Narcissist.
  

To conclude this story, for me, narcissism is the definition of “I am better than everyone else.” I never thought people were like this, but ig humans are real trash.

“So me and my bf were living together and I had been busy lately working and had just gotten off work and got home he was in bed and he had asked for me to give him head and I said yes because I felt like I had been neglecting him because I had been so busy and then when I started initiating stuff I felt something behind his back while he was laying down and it was a note book and it had a Polaroid of a naked women on it and I was like wtf wtf is this and he said that he told me he needed help tryna get off and I was like no no you said you never even touch yourself and I flipped through it and it was a bunch of Polaroids and letters under them and I could feel the pain in my dream and I packed my shit up and left in a truck that Iv never had and had to go on some long ass road trip and really wanted to go to Starbucks and that’s when I woke up”
Reality: we’ve only actually been together for 4 months he’s a great guy and I believe he would never as so much as even look at another women in that type of way and he’s never given me a reason not to trust him, this dream was super random and I want to see what y’all have to say about it. We do not live together either.

I’m going to be in 8th grade on Friday and I’ve been on the same bus since 5th grade I’m on the smaller bus since I have autism adhd medical issues (idk how I can possibly describe pls let me know the correct term) and I’m friends with a girl who sits across from me with her friend My friend has cerbal palsy and her friend has brain damage. Every single day her friend who’s currently a 6th grader brings toys not fidgets which are allowed but a hello kitty bag that blinks and makes noise (which isn’t allowed) and if we hit a tree she screams “BLIMP CHECKS” it really annoys me when my other friend who has a walker races our bus driver she laughs like a maniac (best way I can describe it). When my friend gets on the bus she starts singing loudly with her which also bugs me since I’m sensitive to noise I asked both to please sing quieter. We also hit a bump on the way to the school and they scream “BUMP” and this really upsets the kid in front of them he starts covering his ears the bus driver asks them to be quite the only time she’ll ask. Today my friend said how her class will be having “water slides and making slime on Friday” claming they will be having feild day when our feild day was actually last week and her class already did it and there was no water activity’s I do understand that they might do more but her class already did it. Weeks up before her birthday that will only be what she also talks about she’ll say “*our bus drivers name” I’ll be 14 years old in this amount of days or weeks” she also says she’s the tallest on our route which did actually upset someone (not me) I’m a little bit more taller. There is a kid in a wheelchair on our route and he screams which our driver tells him to stop they sing as loud as he screams. Also about the hello kitty bag I did give her friend a compliment since I love hello kitty. I’m nice to both of them.

Am I wrong for soft ghosting one of my “friends”?
Wow, this one might me a long one.
So I moved to (undisclosed location) sometime in the beginning of last year. When I moved here I really had no friends but became heavily involved in this yoga studio I went to and slowly but surely started to make friends/acquaintances with the teacher that instructed me.
From afar she seemed super cool and I became pretty enthralled with her and her life. I would look forward so heavily to going to her classes every week and was quite intrigued by her. I thought she was funny, bubbly, spunky, cool, and always made jokes during class that made me laugh. As months went by I found myself wanting to get closer and closer to her, and she even invited me out one time to one of her “events” she was hosting. Here’s the thing;
It seemed like we had a lot in common and was just generally craving camaraderie and connection. I felt a sense of belonging with her and wanted to expand that energy in my life, and wanted to do anything I could to get closer to her for those reasons. But I guess this is where we have the first red flag;
One day after class, she extended an invitation to me to a meet up of sorts, (I’m being sparing with details just out of fear she might read this) and when she invited me it seemed like it was gonna be this big thing with lots of people invited, and just in general in talking to her it seemed as if she was very well connected and respected within her community, had lots of friends and connects, and I thought this was gonna be a huge thing that I was even lucky to be invited to. I was super stoked and exited about it.
However when the day of the event came, I was super tired and slow to getting up that morning. I figured I would just make my way over whenever I could since it seemed causal and like you could drop in whenever. I also figured there would be more than enough people that no one would really even notice my arrival or departure. (Plus, sometimes it’s chic to be fashionably late ;) ). Well…. I was most definitely wrong.
When I showed up I heard someone excitedly shout my name, which was her, and she waved me down to the “meet up”…. There was literally only one person there and it had been going on for 2+ hours. I was definitely a bit unnerved, but also didn’t want to be rude, and like I said I was just kind of happy to be there and be getting invited to things. But it was kinda like, damn…. Are these all the friends you have?
I had dressed up and looked cute but they were just kind of wearing whatever and I felt awkward and overdressed and also embarrassed now that I was even this late because it was clearly much more intimate than I expected and my arrival/absence was DEFINITELY felt. We had chatted a bit and that was cool but then I remember her confessing me that she had cried to her husband earlier that morning that she was scared nobody was going to show up and how thrilled she was that not only one, but TWO people had showed up and that it felt like she had friends. I wasn’t really sure what to say or make of that.
She also…. The whole time (and mind you, this is our first legitimate interaction out of yoga class) just kind of kept talking maniacally AT me, not to me, and was coming off almost even manic, and she had formed a white crust of spit around her mouth probably from talking so much that I couldn’t look away from. To say the least, I was a bit disturbed coming away from this interaction but I just kept telling myself that I was being too judgmental of her and to give it a chance and that maybe she was just hyper that day and that I had probably had unintentional embarrassing hygiene moments as well. So I keep going to class and that’s that.
There were several other red flag moments between this first interaction and the next one, mostly just her incredibly cringey social media presence that I genuinely almost couldn’t stand to see without feeling like I was withering away inside, but maybe I’ll save that for later. It’s almost like I couldn’t just see that the person I thought was so cool in class and the person I was seeing her be online and outside of class were the same people. But I digress.
She had actually ended up inviting me to go with her on one of her international yoga retreats, and I was actually very excited about this. I had very little time with her in between classes, and my attraction (but also repulsion) with her was growing stronger and I wanted to figure her out and see what she was really about and what the pull I was feeling towards her was about. Plus, I love travelling and just thought it would be fun.
I had a pretty good time, but we didn’t get to talk much, HOWEVER, I do remember this distinct point during the trip where it was myself, 2-3 other fiends I had made, her brother, and her “best friend” who had happened to be her brother’s Gf in a room together, talking. the brother, the best friend, and the other friend I made just all completely started talking shit about her and I was so confused.
I felt super hurt by this actually, bc I felt like I had a inexplicable bond with the teacher who had invited me, she was the reason we were all there in that beautiful place, and I just couldn’t understand why they were choosing to be so negative about someone I thought they had claimed (at least by title) to love. They would say things like “I can’t fucking stand your sister” (one of the friends I made to the brother) and everyone would just sigh and put their hands in their head and be like “I know…. I know. It’s a lot. She’s a lot”. And I didn’t have anything to add to the conversation because I was just so confused and I knew the girl would just be so upset if she heard them saying this. Anyway… that confusion stuck with me for a while after.
Fast forward maybe a month or two, I started hanging out with her more regularly myself outside of class. I would say this is when we became more “friends”. She would invite me to other teachers classes and we would talk a lot about our lives.
I learned how she felt about her close friend and family connections, and how she often felt hurt and betrayed by people close to her and how some of her friends were actually really shady. I just got a general sense of her feeling scapegoated and libeled against by ppl that got close to her and how she had walls up for that reason.
She also shared to me that most of her family was cut off, with the exception of her brother who she had recently rekindled a connection with, hence why he was on that trip. I felt very bad for her and wanted to be a source of comfort and support, and she would often comment on how she felt a sense of camaraderie with me since I also (LITERALLY) had no family and how we have to make our chosen family. This was a sweet sentiment, for sure, but I was still sussing out how I felt about her.
So one day, a mutual friend that had been on the trip with us was having a birthday party and I guess that she was invited to it, too. She sat down next to me and I was SUPER excited to see her as I was craving her energy and hadn’t seen her in some time. But then… idk. She had had a lot to drink. I’m fully aware that she’s kind of a quirky individual, and has a way of socializing which I can sometimes find a bit uncomfortable or even intense, (like the first meetup I spoke of) but this time it was even more and seemed to be heightened by the drinking.
Her husband was sitting on her other side and kept trying to interject and insinuate that maybe she was doing a bit much, but I think she was drunk enough to the point that she just found it funny and had no awareness of how she was coming off. There’s not even a way I can describe it really, but she just seemed a bit obsessive over me and kept making jokes that were literally not funny and seemed to have lost all ability to read the room. I also had noticed that she had only had TWO beers and was acting like this already which I found… really strange.
So at some point she goes to the bathroom, and I also get in line for the bathroom about 5 mins later. When I get up to the bathroom, she’s still in there, and there’s a line of about 2 or 3 people ahead of me. When she exits the bathroom she immediately spots me and rushes up to me and just starts… drunkenly spewing.
I can’t even remember what she was saying, but we were in a pretty high class establishment and I remember her gushing over me and was saying “I just want to let you know that I don’t really have friends or let people close to me in my circle but I just want to let you know that YOU are officially in my circle and you have earned friend status to me and I’ve let you in my circle…” or something like that. And I just kept thinking, who tf even says that??? I’m pretty sure the last time I checked that friendship is a two way street and it’s not just a title we bestow onto some “lucky” person and that’s that. Like girl… let ME decide if I want to be friends too first.
It was partially that, and also the way she was drunkenly spewing was so awkward and embarrassing bc I could tell all the other women in line were like who tf is this bitch and why is she saying all this weird stuff and like, does she even know you?? Lol. Just a very odd interaction which again, I kind of wrote off, but the unsettling feeling kind of just kept growing after that point.
Then, the time that I REALLY knew something was up came up about a month later, but there are still some key details of this story that are missing. Perhaps I will discuss them later.
SO. About a month later, she invited me last minute to this concert of sorts. When I got there, I was super excited to be there, the vibes were amazing and we were having so much fun. But she had definitely had a lot, A LOT to drink. I didn’t mind at first, because everyone there seemed severely under the influence, but she would just start randomly kind of lashing out at people in the crowd and she thought it was funny? She first loudly and audibly started making fun of some guys shoes in front of us, and was trying to laugh with me as if I would join in, but when his girl friend turned around and shot her a dirty look, she had the nerve to be self conscious and mad about it. She would loudly poke fun at other people in the crowd too, but not in a ha-ha way, just in a straight up mean and asshole way and I could not understand why she would even do that or why she thought that was funny.
Again, I kind of just awkwardly laughed and brushed it off. But when all was said and done and the concert was closing, she enthusiastically invited me back to go to her house and soak in her hot tub. I kept saying are you sure?? But she was like please, PLEASE come, we have weed, we’ll smoke you out and other things and I wanted to continue the vibes because it sounded fun. And then….. completely downhill.
I had arrived back at their place before she did, but as soon as I saw them go in I knocked. When I walked in, she was pale faced up on the floor, non verbal, pretty much motionless, and staring at the ceiling. I was like oh no… it seemed like she got a bit too much to drink. I waited patiently there for a few mins, unsure of what to do as I had just drove for 45 mins and I was still 25 mins in the opposite direction away from home.
I kind of just sat around, and hoped that she would sober up. I asked if she was drunk… she said no. She ran to her bathroom multiple times while her husband (a complete socially awkward case himself) tried to take care of her while she threw up. I asked her if she puked and she also said no. So I didn’t really know what to do. I was trying to offer support/ empathy but she just kept denying any claims of anything being amiss. Her husband left to pick up a pizza and I probably just should’ve left but I’m telling you I had no idea how to exit their house without making it weird or awkward. And I also was hungry. So I just stayed… and waited for the pizza.
What happened in those 20-30 mins, I don’t even know if I can fully explain. She just became… so FUCKING WEIRD. she clearly was embarrassed that I was seeing her drunk, and I think was trying to over compensate. But she just turned into an absolute freak show and I’ve never been more uncomfortable in my life.
She started hoola hooping in my face, and making these weird gremlin faces and noises at me, fell to the floor, rolled round on the floor while continuing to make the noises, convulsed on the floor, but tried to do it in a funny way, tried to make an interpretive dance for me… I’ve truly never experienced something so uncomfortable in my life. I probably do sound like an asshole, but I swear you would just have to be there to see how a) gross and b) weird and actually scary it was. I was genuinely frightened.
I’ve never seen anyone act like that and I didn’t want to make her more uncomfortable or weird by showing her how clearly uncomfortable I actually was. so I just sat there and tried to laugh. But it probably came off as more of a grimace. And for the record, this woman is 33. I am 26. It was just. Obscene.
And she’s tried to act like and say multiple times that she’s like my “big sister”. Now I’ve seen a lot of drunk behavior, but not this. I wolfed down my pizza, and so did she, and she started to get even more philosophical and weird on me, showing me songs and art which were quite frankly some of the worst things I’ve ever heard in my life, and I left as soon as I could.
I was so shaken and disturbed coming away from this, because like I said earlier, I thought she was a cool girl, but honestly her behavior and lack of control over herself completely terrified me. And it’s not like she was drinking liquor, it was just damn IPAs. And I just did not know what to do.
Some details I will try to add to this story, even though I know it’s monolithic at this point , is that 2 months prior to this she had gotten fired from the studio she worked at.
She had a mental breakdown during class because the manager was being mean to her, and he fired her on the spot. I remember being so angry with the owner, (honestly he IS a piece of shit human being) but I thought he was being sexist by calling her mentally unstable and I thought the way he handled things was unfair.
I went so far as to boycott the studio and completely remove myself from it in support of her and followed her to her new one. After the drunk #2 incident, I didn’t hang out with her very much, and only saw her during her class as I was locked into a certain number of classes I had paid for.
I remember her telling me that she had just started at ANOTHER studio, and got fired 3 days after on her birthday and she was talking about how unfair it was and how much of an asshole that new girl was for firing her… and I believed her. AGAIN.
I went so far as to block that girl on Instagram too, but deep down I kind of knew that she had probably just been fired bc let’s face it… as I was starting to discover, she WAS a lot. and the studio was in an upper class area , catered towards more upper echelon people, and I just don’t think she was fitting that image. I lent her an empathetic ear, because that’s all I would want in that situation.
But where she fucked up was sending me screenshot proof of the text exchange between her and that girl, thinking I would take her side, and later sending me screenshots of another conversation she had with the OTHER manager. She told me that this new girl fired her for bringing her husband to class. In my mind I was like, oh no, is she racist!?! Because her husband was black. But no, that’s not what I read at all.
It was the most reasonable, level headed response to someone ever, and laid out multiple offenses and reasons she didn’t want her at the studio. The reasons were honestly so embarrassing that I don’t know why she would send it to me and think I would side with her. She recently also sent me messages with the other boss and the last thing he says to her is “I hope you get help for your mental illness because whatever you have is serious and will impact all your relationships and business and things that you do”. And honestly I can now say in retrospect that those were the truest words ever spoken.
When I read these texts, I had a look back at my whole relationship with and how she would always paint everyone else to be the villain and how everyone is so mean to HER… and the whole time the common denominator was her. It was always her. And it made me rethink everything.
I’ve even had extensive conversations with some of the other people on her trip that were talking shit and couldn’t stand her and they all told me the same things. How it seemed like she was the coolest person ever and had her shit together and seemed like she was going places… but deep down she was just an absolute mess and pushed everyone away from her. And I no longer felt like I was going crazy.
But like I said, she formed a really close bond with me (I think from her perspective) and said she felt like my big sister and family, and shared all these stories about her feeling isolated and shut out by people, but now here I am, doing the exact same thing to her. Icing her out of my life. And I just wanna ask you guys…
Am the asshole?

Never thought I would be a victim of a scam but here I am.
Short story- got scammed by a fake IG thrift store. I've found the IP Address of the scammer. Is there anyway I can pinpoint his exact location?
Long story- I've been looking for motorcycle gear. I followed a few 'thrift' stores on IG that post used gear such as boots and jackets. One day I saw a really nice pair of Dainese boots for INR 9500. A new pair would set you back 4 times that (in India). I DM'd the page and he sent me a few pictures of the boots and said it's of great condition. His grammar was good too so I believe it was a legit store. I also found posts on his page from 2021 which gave me more confidence. Long story short. I paid him and shared the shipping address. I also told my friend about the great deal I got. He reached out to the same dude and found boots for himself. But the guy stopped responding to me so I started doubting him. I asked my friend to wait but he went ahead and paid him INR 2000 as an advance. A couple of days passed and the day the boots were supposed to be delivered came and went. There was no response which is when I went back to his page and found someone had commented saying he's a scammer. I reached out to the guy who had commented and he told me that the same thing happened to him. He had blocked both me and my friend on IG. However, I had replied to his story from a different profile so he thought he could scam another person. By pretending to be a customer, I was able to find his IP address. I've raised a complaint to the police but is there any way to pinpoint his exact location? Would love to get him arrested.

I have been an esthetician and started working at my current job over 6 months ago. I’ve never experienced such an unhappy guest and it bothered me and I let it get to me.
She had come in for a Brazilian, we are given 15 minutes to do a Brazilian and have a 9 minute late policy, she got there 2 minutes before we would have had to cancel her appointment. I had my next person already there waiting for their appointment that was right after her. So her appointment was supposed to start at 3:45pm and she got there at 3:53pm by the time she got to the room and on my table it was 3:55pm. So I was essentially given 5 minutes to do her Brazilian. Once I laid down the first bikini line strips (we use hard wax) she was fine, but the ones on the mound she started asking me to do smaller strips, I had nicely explained that the strips I was laying down were normal sized strips and it is how I was trained to do it in school and at my job. She complained that I did two pulls on her labia strips but I do a small flip so I can grab my tab and then quickly remove the wax strip allowing the client to take a deep breath so it’s more comfortable. I explained this to her as well. After I had continuously explained why I am doing my job I knew I probably should have ended the service but I continued. Mind you she was petite and had been getting waxed for years so she barely had any hair to start. So my first mound strip took off almost all the hairs so I did one on the other side to remove the opposite sides hair but I usually do one long strip across the top, if there is no hair on the other side because it won’t be painful there’s no hair there to start. Anyway I had finished her Brazilian in 5 minutes and at the end of the service she looked down and noticed a few hairs left, I let her know since I only had 5 minutes to finish her Brazilian she could always come back when we have time so I would be able to grab the very few hairs that got left. She then continued to ask me for my tweezers and I explained that I do not let my clients use my equipment because it is unsanitary. I then walked her up to the front handed her my card and and mentioned that she had a few hairs left and since I didn’t have enough time she can go ahead and book for a clean up that is free. I’m glad it was my manager at the front desk.
While I was still out there along with my next client she then decided to say I do not want to rebook with her she is not trained properly and she doesn’t know how to do her job, I have a great manager because she had brought up how she signed our late policy agreement and how I was given only 5 minutes to do her Brazilian. After my manager had explained that she then demanded my manager take a look at her skin because she said it was raw. My manager didn’t even ask if she would like her to take a look she just demanded her to look, my manager has been an esthetician for over 15 years. She took a look at her skin and told her that her skin wasn’t raw it was red and that’s normal after a wax. While I had taken my next client back she was still going on about it during that entire appointment and my next clients friend was texting her while she in the room saying the lady was still complaining. I felt so bad and that I was nervous now that she had heard what my last client was saying about me that she wouldn’t want to get her Brazilian done also. Luckily after that appointment she rebooked and her friend told me no matter whether you made smaller strips or not she was going to be pissed off and complain. Later my manager and I had talked about it and I explained exactly what I did and she has also seen how I wax so she knows exactly how I laid down my strips. I had become really upset and started crying because all I want is for my clients to be happy and as comfortable as possible. My manager had told me she’s not worth my tears no matter how I waxed her she had already came in with an attitude. I was really nice to this lady even if I was upset with how it was going I still told her to have a good day and everything. I was happy to see later on that day that one of my favorite clients had come in to see me to buy some product and she made the rest of my day. The lady with how she acted in front of other clients she is now no longer able to book at any of the locations…
What do you guys think of this??

Long post- sorry in advance.
I’m in my late 30’s and feel like my life has reached its capacity. I’ve already gone through a divorce so my walls were up, not feeling I could trust anyone. I finally met someone that treated me like a king. I was hesitant but fell for her. We were together for just over 3 years but she broke it off because she had to move away. I know there was a small reason she needed to but I think she chose that specific location because she wanted to be in that environment. We still talked like we were together and always said we’d love each other and stay in touch no matter what. She even said “I won’t discard you for anyone”. Our last exchange was a loving one, then the very next one she said we cannot be friends or talk to each other because she’s started dating someone. I knew this would happen and even told her it would, but she assured me it wouldn’t. How the hell can you say something like that to someone one minute and then switch up the very next? Someone you said you’d always loved and was your best? I understand the whole “no contact” but that’s not what she ever said before…I’m fucking heartbroken. I literally think about her everyday. I cannot for the life of me get her out of my head. I now feel like everything after was all so disingenuous. I know I need to but I just can get over this girl…
I say this to say that I’ve gone through so much heartbreak, failures and self worth that this was the last straw. I hate myself and clearly don’t offer anything to anyone. I understand that I’m the problem. I’m not sure what I’ve done in a previous life, but it was enough to deal me a shitty hand. I don’t need to hear about how other people have it worse, I already understand this. I want to leave this world but know I can’t do it myself. I go to bed every single night hoping I never wake up. I’m almost at the point of paying someone to do it. There’s quite the gang presence where I live, so that’s always been an idea for me.
I just felt like I needed to get it out there one last time and just figure out a way to do it. Hopefully soon.
Sound away…

What’s the #1 thing every founder needs to know?

I’ll give you a few minutes to make a list — top of mind might include sales, marketing, technology, product management (especially product-market fit), technical skills, fundraising, team building, leadership, management, finance, and planning/executing strategic growth and scaling.
Sure… but, sorry, none of that is the correct answer. Because, of course, you know that founders typically are expected to be jacks of all trades. So yes, to all of the above, but that’s not the secret sauce.
The #1 thing every founder needs to know is… themself.
Here’s the truth: founders start companies, and entrepreneurs build them. While not every entrepreneur is a founder (think franchise owners), every founder is an entrepreneur (at least initially).
If you’re like me, you are a forward-obsessed founder. That means where you are now is always building toward where you want to go. That person is always an entrepreneur. Once the company is started, you’ll do what it takes — including relinquishing control — to keep it growing.
Does that sting? We founders think of our companies as our babies, but statistics say we’re likely to be the ones kicked out of the nest. Also, research shows that in the US, only 14 out of the top selling 500 companies still have the original founder running the company. And the Harvard Business Review reports that most founders relinquish control long before their companies go public — and that four out of five are forced to step down as CEO.
It doesn’t have to be that way if you have one critical attribute: self-awareness. That way, you can decide as your company grows how you want to evolve your role in the overall day-to-day running of the company (i.e., learn, delegate, hire, move on). And ultimately, you can make better choices at critical growth junctures in your business progression.
So, to help you become more self-aware, it’s helpful to understand the different types of founders. Let’s dive in.

The Types of Founders

A couple of notes before we get into specifics:

• Much like any other classification, there are gray areas, so you (and many of the examples I share in this article) may fit into more than one category.
• Some traits are common to all founders, such as being open to innovation, passionate about their project, risk-takers, etc. But some founders excel or even over-index in certain attributes, so that’s what you’ll see in the different types.

The bottom line: knowing your strongest/weakest points is a critical piece of the self-awareness pie. That way, you can conduct your business in what I call the Green Zone — aka the Genius Zone, where you have both high passion and high competence — and make the best choices for you and your company.

1. The Solo Founder

Traits:

• Fiercely independent
• Self-assured
• Strong belief in their vision/idea
• Business strongly tied to skill set and experience
• Resilient (i.e., can withstand feelings of loneliness)

Benefits:

• Freedom
• Complete control
• Learn a lot

Pitfalls:

• Solo-founded companies statistically have a higher failure rate
• Harder to raise money/VCs are more reticent
• Health impacts: burnout, loneliness, etc.
• Attention is divided because you wear all the hats (marketing, sales, building your product, finances, fundraising, prospecting for new customers, etc.)
• Complete responsibility for all aspects of the business

Example: Sara Blakely, Spanx Founder
Ten years ago, in 2012, when she was just 38, Sara Blakely became the world’s youngest self-made female billionaire. Her business, built on a significant industry gap (the lack of comfortable, effective shapewear) and her incredible sales hustle, also benefited greatly from Blakely’s abundant self-awareness. Here’s her advice to solo founders at a 2020 business conference:

“I tell people as soon as you can afford to hire your weaknesses, do it… As soon as I could afford to hire someone to do more of the operations side of the business, I did. As an entrepreneur, one of the biggest gifts you can give yourself is to stay in your lane.”

In other words, know what your Green Zone is and play there.
If you’re like Blakely, it’s usually big ideas and sales ability (she could easily qualify as a Visionary Founder, too) or operations and execution (what Blakely realized she needed help with).
Pro tip: If you’re a solo founder, you’ll likely want to lean into an entrepreneurial framework like the Entrepreneurial Operating System (EOS) to help you define and settle into which side you skew toward.

2. The Visionary Founder (or Co-founders)

Traits:

• Driven by a big idea
• Disruptive — recognizes opportunities to upend traditional norms
• Focused and clear
• Persistent
• Natural salesperson
• Can see the big picture
• Collaborative (esp. In co-founder scenario)
• Motivated by the impact they have — more than $$ alone

Benefits:

• Passionate about their work
• Aren’t easily derailed — failures are expected, and mistakes are not made twice
• Inspired leadership

Pitfalls:

• So focused on the big picture that they may miss important details
• A visionary idea doesn’t automatically = visionary leadership
• Disconnected from reality at times
• Easily bored when the mundane takes priority
• May not plan succession well
• Unrealistic expectations
• Poor communication

Example: Steve Jobs & Steve Wozniak
Considering that Steve Jobs’ name is pretty much synonymous with “visionary,” I don’t think I need to list more than the products and industries Jobs’ revolutionized at Apple and beyond — Apple Computers, iPod (iTunes), iPad, iPhone, Pixar, iCloud — with many products and points in between. George Lucas, from whom Jobs bought the Graphics Group at Lucasfilm and renamed it “Pixar,” perfectly summarizes his superpower:

“The magic of Steve was that while others simply accepted the status quo, he saw the true potential in everything he touched and never compromised on that vision.”

Steve Wozniak was the technological yin to Jobs’ sales and marketing yang, bringing the vision of a computer with a graphic interface to life. From the visionary files, “Woz” also invented the first programmable universal remote and was an early innovator of wireless GPS (thanks to his clever dogs who routinely evaded electronic fences).

3. The Serial Disruptor

Traits:

• Varied interests & capabilities
• Easily bored — desires variety and change
• Optimistic
• Extremely innovative
• High threshold for pain
• Accepting of failure
• Self-reliant
• Diverse capabilities
• Bold vision
• Motivated by the impact they have — more than $$ alone

Benefits:

• Variety of experiences
• Flexibility and freedom
• Diversification
• Tons of opportunities for creative expression
• Greater earning opportunities
• Disrupts industries
• Attracts high-quality talent

Pitfalls:

• High risk
• Difficulties finding trustworthy partners/can get stuck helming something when you want to move on
• Multitudes of people reliant on you
• Divided focus
• Ego-driven pursuits

Example: Elon Musk
Like him or loathe him, Elon Musk is perhaps the most prolific (and successful) serial founder of all time with startups including Tesla, SpaceX, The Boring Company, and Neuralink, among others. His drive to design opportunities to evolve humanity has redefined both hustle culture and the art of serial entrepreneurship.
For serial founders, having a set of principles is key to their success. In Musk’s case, his use of “first principles” — reducing a process to its essential parts — has served him well, from helping him figure out how to make rockets cheaper and reusable (SpaceX) to shifting the narrative of electric vehicles (Tesla).

4. The Engineer

Traits:

• Engineer by experience and nature
• Technically savvy
• Able to problem-solve technology-driven issues (not just with the product but also operations-wise)
• Strong desire to not just innovate but also to accelerate progress
• Expansive vision of how technology can solve common problems
• Level-headed
• Agile, fast learners
• Focused on execution

Benefits:

• Pragmatic approach
• Own technology
• Problems are solved quickly
• Able to employ technology to reduce time to market
• Solutions for products can become new products in their own right

Pitfalls:

• Not well versed in other crucial areas (i.e., sales, marketing)
• Over-index on having lower Emotional Intelligence (EQ)
• Because they can learn quickly, so may get stuck playing outside of the green zone

Example: Mark Zuckerberg
Much like the other examples I’m sharing, Mark Zuckerberg’s story has been widely told, so you probably know about his development of Facebook. But at his core, Zuckerberg is an engineering prodigy and geek. At just 13 in 1997, he built “ZuckNet,” which enabled the family’s home computers to communicate via Ping (a precursor of AOL’s Instant Messenger) with his father’s dental office computers. He was using AI in his senior year in high school, so the roots of his Meta(verse) focus today are apparent.
A common weakness for engineers is they tend to have a lower EQ, which has been well-researched. As a former engineer, I understand how logic and technology come easier than understanding human behavior. This is why tech founders should seek out mentors early and bring in competent leaders with high EQ and leadership skills — for example, Zuckerberg credits his former COO of 14 years, Sheryl Sandberg, for turning the company into a multi-billion dollar company.

5. The Personality Founder

Traits:

• Charismatic and gregarious
• Attracts a vast audience
• Influential
• Ambitious
• Forward-thinking
• Inwardly motivated (responds to a “calling”)
• Excellent storytellers
• Authentic and honest (ideally 😉)

Benefits:

• Has a built-in audience and established social platforms
• Likely has pre-existing wealth (can help fund the business/mitigate startup money woes)
• Can use their power for good; disruptive in a positive way

Pitfalls:

• Needs to find the right people to trust
• Can’t just be the “face” of the business; needs to accrue real business chops
• Celebrity and influence status don’t equal quality products
• Difficult or impossible for the founder to leave

Example: Oprah
I’m using Oprah as an example, as her products are an outgrowth of her — her eponymous talk show, which ran for 25 years, the OWN network, O Magazine, her book club, and a variety of charitable endeavors comprise her vast empire. But of course, we know plenty of other personality brands that have racked up billions in sales and even transformed, from the Kardashians/Jenners, to Bethany Frankel and Ryan Reynolds (just watch Deadpool 3 to see his brands — coming in 2023).
In today’s age of influence, we’ve seen a surge of personality brands and founders who leverage built-in audiences and communities to scale quickly. All these names are business mavericks in their own right, but many didn’t start out this way — they deftly utilize their charisma and ability to entertain to shape their brands and pave the way to success.

6. The Accidental Founder

Traits:

• Independent
• Resourceful
• Necessity-driven
• Follow their desire/passion
• Creative
• Willing to take risks

Benefits:

• A deep belief in what they’re doing
• Solves real-world problems based on personal experience
• Discover they’re much happier running their own show
• Turns skills, vocation, or avocation into a profitable business

Pitfalls:

• May not have the business chops
• Reluctant business person — may not actually want to run their own business
• Needs to find the right people to trust
• Overwhelm

Example: Yvon Chouinard
Patagonia founder Yvon Chouinard has been in the news lately for giving away his company to fight climate change. He’s an OG accidental entrepreneur whose passion for rock climbing led him to develop reusable pitons (rock climbing spikes) and, later, heavy-duty shirts. Famously Chouinard called himself a “dirtbag climber” and didn’t want to become a business mogul. Sixty-five years later, this accidental founder’s company is valued at $3 billion, and his latest innovation is a way of giving away the profits of a company to continue his contribution to society — protecting and preserving the natural world.
As I always say, there are riches in the niches, and accidental entrepreneurs are the leading type of founders to discover a marketplace with little or no competition.

7. The Intentional Founder

Traits:

• Purpose-driven
• Strong ideals and values
• Passionate about the bigger picture impacts
• Socially conscious
• Clear and focused on the brand mission

Benefits:

• An empathetic approach to the product/the company
• Can educate, empower, and motivate others (i.e., team, customers)
• Employees are statistically more satisfied and likely to stay
• Commitment to a higher ideal engenders more loyalty and trust with the general public (customers)

Pitfalls:

• Moving from individual ideals to a group effort is tricky
• Difficult to find employees with perfectly aligned values
• Might not have the business experience to set the organization up for long-term success
• Purpose-driven (belief) isn’t the same as purpose-enabled (capability)
• Might be challenging for the company to survive the loss of the founder

Example: Jessica Alba
While Jessica Alba does have some touches of a Personality Founder (she is an actor) and an Accidental Founder (an allergic reaction to detergent made her worry about her new baby’s sensitive skin), she is an excellent example of an intentional founder. Back in 2008, when Alba had that allergic reaction, influencer marketing wasn’t what it is today — plus, she had some success but was by no means a household name. Ditto for eco-conscious consumer packaged goods — a plus, sure, but didn’t have the same urgency and importance it does today. Alba then spent years researching ingredients in everyday products and even went to DC to lobby for updates to the 1976 Toxic Substances Control Act. Convinced that consumers need safe, affordable, environmentally friendly products for kids and home, Alba launched The Honest Company in 2011.
Now, she did have seasoned co-founders, her own wealth to use out the gates, and VC support shortly after that, but it has always been Alba’s commitment to and alignment with the brand’s core principles that have kept the brand growing and thriving — today, as a publicly traded company with a 2021 $412.8 IPO.
What type of founder are you? Definitely feel free to share in the comments.

18M experiences weird ghosting(?) by 18F
So there’s this girl that I was talking to for like 2 months. We’re both seniors and are going to the same college so it was really easy to bond and throughout the two months we really connected with each other. Like after about a month we were mutually committed to each other and we would talk on the phone all night, talk throughout the day, and be there for each other whenever it was needed. The only real problem is that I tend to overthink a lot, as I’ve had bad anxiety issues in the past. This windiest is compounded by the fact I was played in my last relationship by a girl who said she loved me and swore she was loyal that was talking to other dudes and picked them over me. But anyways, I would try to express how the overthinking made me feel to her but I really wanted to get her on a call because other than seeing her we only exchanged voice notes and never really got on calls. This expanded my intuition and made me think I was getting played so I did some mild research. We follow each other on Ig and she has a lot upwards of a thousand followers, which also set some alarm bells off in my brain because I knew she was most likely lying that I was the only want for her and everything. Also, just through like looking at her post comments, I saw that she still had her ex bfs flirty comments up there for a while when we were talking and that she still followed him, making me think that I was possibly going to be a rebound. Also, based on her TikTok reposts, she was just starting to get over him when she told me they had been done for three months so I didn’t know what to believe. But while we were talking, me and her shared everything with each other like past trauma, current issues, and I play guitar so I would sing love songs to her or send them to her(corny Ik) so she told me that she’s been deeply traumatized in past relationships and that her ex was the worst of them all because he would use her for her body and I think she implied some abuse so I knew to be gentle with her. She also said that no guy had ever put in so much effort to talk to and understand her and that it was so different and special to her. So everything is going good and I really like this girl, like more than anyone before. And like I said, we’re going to the same college so we both like follow the college posting accounts and follow people that are going to be her classmates. So one day, I follow someone a guy in there with my major, but when I do I realize my girl already followed him. So I go back to the college account (which consists of 90% girls) and realize that she hasn’t followed a single girl on there and follows basically every guy. This makes me feel awful because just logically, on an account with 90% girls being posted, can you following every dude but no girls be considered as anything but looking for replacements or new guys to talk to? So in the heat of when I found this out, I send her a pretty stern voice note in a tone I regret asking why she’s following that ratio of girls to guys when she has deemed me as “perfect”, “the one”, and “her favorite ever” and when she’s said we’re locked in and committed and I’ve agreed. Like at this point I wasn’t even looking at other girls anymore so it was really hurtful. So she responds nds with saying she follows everyone(not true) and that I’m reading way too much into this and that she’ll unfollow if there is a problem and now she feels confused and off about me. She also said she knows I don’t trust her now. She said she was going to get gas and after that, she ignored all of my texts for a week but always viewed my stories so I knew she just didn’t want to talk to me. This really breaks my heart because she told me she wasn’t like that and she would never just leave. So after a week, she finally responded and said that “I’m sorry and that I should’ve said something and I didn’t want you to think I left so easily. I have a on my plate rn and you’re such a sweet guy and I really hope this could work in the future but I have too much rn I’m sorry.” So I respond saying that I understand I’m not the most important thing in her life and that I was sorry for making her think I didn’t trust her because I do and I just wanted to understand her pov. I also said that I want to be a safe space for her and that she can communicate that with me bc let’s be honest, no one is too busy to shoot out a 5 second text update. Plus, it was too coincidental it came after our first real negative communication. So it’s been over a week and she still hasn’t responded to me so I assume I’ve been ghosted. I miss her so much and I’ve been trying to move on but I blame myself for this so it’s harder to move on then if I got played. Was that the breakup text she sent? It hinted at the future and I know I shouldn’t take her back but I know I would because of how much I miss her. Was I out of line to question her following because I knew I probably should’ve stayed away from the topic but I wanted to communicate how it made me feel. I feel like she def got a friends opinion and then decided to ghost because she seemed more apologetic at first. Is this even a ghost and did she ever really mean what she said about me being the one for her and her favorite guy ever? I want honest opinions on the situation and please don’t just give me the move on talk. I really just can’t and I feel like I’ve messed everything up and that I may love her. Should I call her? I don’t want to seem desperate.

Characters in this story (me 17) (Sydney 16)
So about a month ago me and this girl we will call Sydnee started dating, I met her at a get together at a friends house, she was a nice person when we started dating. This was my first relationship so i didn’t see any red flags, so a week into our relationship she started asking me to grind against her and stuff, I told her I don’t feel comfortable doing that and that I would rather just have intimacy in the future and not a week into us dating, she yelled at me at called me intimacy driven because I told her no. Later that night she called me. Crying that she was roped, I stated to freak out and I Told her to tell me what happened, she said her parents weren’t home and she invited one of her boy friends over to hangout, and one thing led to another but apparently this boy only figured her, I told her to report him and stuff but she didn’t, so 3 weeks pass and she asks me to grind against her again, I told her I want to wait and plus I would rather have real intimacy then just grinding, she got all mad at me and stopped talking to me for a week, the following Monday she asked if I could do it again and I finally gave in from pressure and did what she wanted, she was happy and was climbing on top of me for the next week. After while I started working more and didn’t give her as much attention i used to. She called me 3 days ago calling me intimacy driven because her online friends say so. She said everytime we hangout we have intimacy and I told her we haven’t even had intimacy but she didn’t listen, and I told her if she’s going to keep telling these people about our personal relationship then I don’t want to date her so I told her we’re over. She begged for me to take her back but I was a fool taking her back, not 10 min later she calls me saying we need to take a break and that she thinks I’m dating her for her body. I told her why I’m in a relationship and she didn’t like my answer, so we broke up, she proceeded to text every single one of my friends why we broke up, she had told them that I would force my self onto her and grind against her and that I was breaking her boundaries at this point I had a enough and screamed at her that she’s a horrible person for telling all my friends that I had roped her when I never did, but I’m glad non of my friends believed her because they have known me for the last 12 years, then last night she called me saying she has a new boyfriend and saying she’s having panic attacks because she thought she losts a friend, I told her she lost her friend when she texted my friends all those things, she has been texting and calling me saying she still loves me but I’ve been ignoring her. Am I the Asshole?

Hello,
I have been meaning to post her for a bit but have been doing a lot of reading. My (M34) wife (F33) of 4.5 years and together in total about 9 years with a 3 year old son, had an ~15 month long affair with a coworker. He lives on the other side of the country so it was EA with a lot of sexuality that turned into full blown PA at a 3 day work retreat.
I found out because he was fired from his job for unrelated issues, when reviewing his logs, they found explicit conversations with my wife. She was able to keep her job but someone involved with her HR department or someone she told sent me an anonymous email. She played dumb at first and said she had no idea what they were talking about. That night, I checked her text and didn't see much but noticed the text chain with her best friend was gone. I found it in the recently deleted. It was clear of the EA at that point. She finally admitted only with the proof but insisted it was only EA. I found a lot more proof and the next day (also my birthday) that it was a full PA and gave a basic timeline of events. (She This all went down about 7 weeks ago, in late March.
We both had underlying issues that put our relationship in a state where she felt the desire to have an affair. But she has taken taken responsibility for it being 100% on her.
They used WhatApp to text and exchange photos but set it to delete after 24 hours so that is all gone. Some of the things I saw in the emails/text from when we were out of country and she had to use email. Including lots of I love you, describing the acts, talking about the marks he left, how he owned her, and how they couldn't wait to be together. We were looking into moving during the affair and she was pushing hard to move to the are where he lived. She texted her BFF how should could then divorce me when I was out there so our son would be stuck out there.
She still has a ton of 'mental blocks' regarding the whole affair and cannot give me many answers that seem like she should know. Both of us are in IC and just started MC.
She told me that if he reached out, she would let me know right away. A few weeks ago, he reached out to her saying that he needed to talk via a new phone number. She told me after a few hours and she contemplated responding but did not. She did not block him. A week later he sent a follow up text blaming her for ruining his life and putting the affair on her. He is also married with 2 kids and I told OBS within a few hours of finding out.
She let me know about this second text after about 7 hours because the time was just not right and she was busy being out to dinner with her girlfriends. I asked if she would block him now and she said she would. I did not see if she did it right then or now. A few days later, on last Tuesday, I asked if he was blocked and she said no, she forgot to do it and went to do it then. A day later, I took her phone and deleted the text because he listed other ways to contact him and I didn't want to have that. She noticed that the text was gone and had issue with it, and it in part started a fight.
Fast-forward to last night, I check to see if he was still blocked and he was not. She admitted to unblocking him on Friday. By her words, she was mad that I deleted the text, it reminder her that he was garbage. She was hoping that when she unblocked him, she could get it back or that he sent another one like that to remind her. She then realized that's not how it work. At that point, since the text were gone, and she removed the block, she did have his phone number and could not reblock him. She never told me about any of this. I have no idea if she had reached out to him in the mean time and no way to know if they set up another way to communicate.
She is making an argument that she never made a promise to keep him blocked and that it was just a moment of weakness..
I did get very upset and said some nasty things. I have done a very good job not doing that until this point. She also lost her control as well and got very aggressive in response to my anger.
For the most part in our R she has been putting in the work. Some days are better than other but we have both improved in our communication but still have a long way to go. We do both have lapse in our communication that have led to arguments 1-2 per week.
What I am looking for here is any input. Is R still viable? Is she creating a pattern of behaviors that she won't be able to break? Anything that you guys may see that I am missing. I have it marked as advice welcomed, I would like to hear from anyone who wants to share.
Thank you.