Hello all, long story short, my friend (she is from India and so are her captors/employers) is a victim of "forced labor" human trafficking. She has gone to hell and back in the last 7 years and has finally mustered the strength to leave, I am picking her up tonight at 10:30 p.m. and I am terrified... If you're interested in reading more details about her ordeal, read the long paragraphs below, but in short... my plan is to drive her up to the Indian Consulate in San Francisco, CA (she has recently talked to her sister in India who informed her that this is what she should do in order to go back to India, but what if she's wrong?) which is where she will get help and be on her way to India? Is this correct? I have never done this before and I am not sure what to do... The last thing I want to do is to drive my friend (who has zero money, an expired visa, no passport, speaks broken English, and is extremely vulnerable) to a place where she won't be helped and she has nowhere to turn to.
I met (let's call her Maria) Maria, about 2.5 years ago. We are both vendors at local Farmers markets here in Los Angeles, CA. From the MOMENT I met her, I knew something was very wrong. On my first day arriving at a specific farmers market, she and her boss were my next-booth neighbors. I asked Maria, "Hello, it's my first day here at this market, do you know if I can park at xy street or would I get a ticket??". She looked at me and immediately walked away. Her boss right away stepped up and said "Don't ask her, she wouldn't know, yes you can park at xy street". I thought well that's strange... why did she not let her talk... that girl looks scared. I had never seen such a tired and defeated looking human in my life. Most times her boss left her there to work while she went and worked other markets. Well I got to know maria and she became a very special friend of mine, she is caring, selfless and has all the good traits any good and decent human does. I don't know where to begin with describing what she's gone through. Her English is broken but I can understand 95% of what she tells me. I will try my best but I don't know every single detail.
She knows these people since when she lived back in India with her mom, dad, brothers, sisters. These suspects have businesses here in the U.S and over in India and employ both her father and uncles. They told Maria that they had an opportunity for her if she was interested. There was a man who was looking for a wife and they had told this man about Maria, he was interested. The plan was for Maria to travel to the U.S, marry this man, and employment with these suspects was guaranteed. Since her life was hard over there, she was intrigued and accepted. When she arrived they gave her the runaround...seems there was never a man for her to marry, instead they had her work endlessly on their business that is ran from a remote farming community here in Southern California. They threatened her by telling her they'd hurt her family back in India AND they'd lose their jobs, they'd hurt her, they'd do this, they'd do that. They have beaten her so many times, I've seen the bruises and begged her to let me take pictures that I would keep privately (but for proof if in the future they were needed) but every time I would ask, she'd always immediately refuse and said she'd have hell to pay if they found out. They have told her that she will never talk to her family back in India and she has not been able to do so since she left India.
They have her sleep inside a barn with the animals. They humiliate her, the husband and wife (and sister of wife) hit her so often and even broke her nose once. You can actually see where her nose healed crooked. There's been times where I did not see her for 2 or 3 weeks straight and sure enough, it was because she had some sort of injury she was healing (black eye, etc.). She has ran away several times only to go back several hours later because she has nowhere to go and is scared shitless. She basically works 24/7 too. She is not allowed to talk to anyone and when she and I are both at the same market (and her boss is dropping her off) we have to pretend to not know each other. Her boss picks her (and the equipment) up from the farmers market sometimes at 5-6 p.m. Mind you... all us other vendors have left at 2pm. So she just waits and waits to be picked up. She is not allowed to have ANY technology. She is not able to watch TV (she doesn't live inside a house anyway), when I was getting to know her... i realized she doesn't even know what is going on in the world (doesn't even know school shootings exist in this country). Her captors go through her things, they get extremely upset if vendor friends gift her items, (little pastries, gifts, etc. that they sell) or make conversation with her. For Christmas, my birthday, any holiday, she will go out of her way to give me a little gift (even if it's an insignificant little thing like a nail polish etc.) and she has given me her food when she knows I'm having a hard day and I'm upset (she knows I deal with an abusive husband and we bond over our difficult experiences) just to cheer me up. Little by little I have convinced her that she can trust me and that I would drive her to the airport and pay for her ticket, etc to get her back to India and escape from this abuse. I got her a cell phone that she only uses for internet that she has to keep hidden. Well with that cell phone and apps she was finally able to contact her family. She said that they said that they had not had jobs with these people for years and basically all the fear they put into her was B.S. They have for years been looking for her. She's still scared shitless but she says she cannot take it anymore. I have lost sleep over what my friend goes through. I don't know anyone who has suffered as much as she has. Again, what I described above is not all she has shared with me.. it's worse.
She doesn't want me to meet her at the ranch where she lives because she fears for my safety. She worries they will do something to me out of desperation (because they might be facing legal issues now), so I have to meet her in front of a store tonight, she will walk hours to get there. She doesn't trust the police, the last time she ran away she flagged down the police, told them the situation and basically said hey you don't have proof, there's not much we could do. I'd imagine that this distrust for the police is shared in these migrant-rich farming communities. I recently got a new job (in order to leave my own abusive relationship) and I will have to miss work to take her there, which I'm willing to do, I just want to make sure that we are going about this the right away. I also have two little kids at home (6 and 4 y.os) I am willing to pay for her ticket...I can make that money back. But gosh... I'm terrified. All these government offices are closed right now, since it's the weekend. I will make so many calls early tomorrow to make sure I know what my friend is getting herself into. Does anyone here have any advice? Tips? Anything that might be helpful.
I really hope she presses charges and these people pay for what they have done but I am discouraged by the fear I see in her. I can't blame her. I look forward to seeing their business crumble as they no longer have her endless help. Thanks for reading all this..

There are many XFs like this WF from the background who loves and supports AMs such as found in the link

https://old.reddit.com/AsianMasculinity/comments/1cv3urz/yall_are_loved_and_cherished_and_if_youre_not/

Then there are ricels who get skeptical just because they don't get any action, thereby projecting their personal failures with women unto Asian fellas as a whole. You see them with comments like

Supportive words have their place, but validation of those words by proof of results is what ultimately matters.

and

because truth of the matter is the average asian guy won't get the same attention as the average non-asian guy.
i know you're trying to uplift and encourage but in real life the avg asian guys are mostly invisible.
hope the best for your relationship. i know y'all will raise your kids well (if y'all plan that far ahead and plan to have kids).

Both of them lie because the truth is that WMAF/XMAF < AMWF/AMXF quantitatively and qualitatively, and this includes the extensive cheating advantage of mail order brides in WMAF/XMAF, yet still arent as numerous as AMWF/AMXF. Always has and this was during the pre-Hallyu era, making XM incels, Lululemons, and ricels become xxxtra butthurt. Want to know which non-Asian countries where AMWF/AMXF outnumber WMAF/XMAF? Russia, Poland, Czech Republic, Slovakia, Hungary, Brazil, Mexico, Chile, Jamaica, Morocco, and Tunisia. Even some legit western countries are included such as Germany, France, Sweden, Netherlands, Wales, Austria, and Spain. This not a full list either. There are many others I didnt bother to mention and not going to moving forward because I rather have Asian fellas travel and explore the world, beyond the usual suspects. Holy moley, Russia alone has more AMWF than all the WMAF has combined in the west! Its so overwhelming that some white fella had to point it out to another White fella https://archive.ph/fB8RS.
Ricels are mostly American, thus, have a very narrow American-centric view of things. Despite the US making up immigrants from every part of the world, people who have been abroad knows that America is still not all of humanity, and not's even close. For one, the US population is small relative to its large land size. Two, the majority of descendants from Europe, Asia, Africa, etc, that immigrated to America many generations ago were beta rejects from their native countries. Three, the US is increasingly becoming irrlevant on the world stage and its demise is due to their maladjusted and inadequate government, and China with its allies accelerating America's fall.
Multitudes of US born and raised AMs are also very clueless regarding romance. I guarantee there were many or at least some real cases about windows of opportunity throughout their lives for them to get with excellent high quality XFs that werent descended from beta reject families of their native countries, and these XFs also being a lot more attractive in every level than Americanized Lululemons, yet numerous American AMs chose not to reciporcate flirations by XFs that clearly showed strong interest.
Partly to blame is the beta upbringing that American AMs had, so they lacked the ability to read signals accurately and act accordingly combined with outdated expectations for the AMs to only go for AF, while only living in a non-Asian country where XFs are so much more common. Another reason is the brainwashing effects of American media that engineered AMs to be undesirable within the US.
Even then, propaganda does have its limitations and the previous generations of Boomers, GenX, and Millennials success of AMs with XFs is proof of that, especially Southeast Asian men (Filipinos, Burmese, Viets, Cambodians, Malaysians, Indonesians, etc) who did a lot more repping AMXF without any media hype uplifting their image. This must be endlessly frustrating for East AM ricels that look down on Southeast Asians lol. Not saying Southeast AM ricels dont exist btw because they do. Its just more impressive that a group of men (Southeast AM) which had the same hurdles as East AM, yet Southeast AMs still slayed so much in comparison! Southeast AM didnt have the advantage of having tv dramas that tug at the heart strings or exhilarating comic books to give them any halo effect which East AMs have in spades. You can even say Southeast AM faced more discrimination than their East AM bruthas because not only did Southeast AM get racist treatment from non-Asians in America as many of us know how a lot of Americans especially tend to be "Hurr durr, ALL gooks look alike, whether theyre east or southeast hahahahahaha", Southeast AMs also got racist treatment from their snooty East Asian-American kin. I can picture East AM ricels try to come up with a retort that goes "But but but but Southeast AMs don't have the cultural expectation to only stick with AFs from their respective ethnic group." Uh yeah they do, including Filipinos who are arguably the most chill and relaxed ethnicity out of all Southeast Asians or Asians as a whole or people in general.
A solacement is that some American AMs, particularly East Asian because they prematurely sabotage themselves the most, broke away from the evil magic spell of US brainwashing and rebelled against their mommy's and daddy's expectations about being a "good" Asian son, whatever the fuck that means, unashamedly went for the XFs they love rather than settling with a disturbed Lululemon. The AF may not even be a Lu. There are Asian fellas that barely find AFs physically attractive while these Asian fellas are genuinely attracted to XFs. I don't blame them because physical Asian attributes look better and more fitting on men after all. Physical attraction is usually the first step for men to be interested at starting intimate relations with a women, although other aspects are important too such as personalities being compatible. Asian fellas who had the guts to forge their life like that can be considered BAD (Big Asian Dick) Boys as well.
Then at the first link I showed, there is a Lulumon larping as a young White woman who said

As a white girl with a Chinese husband, I loved your post until I got to the mega cringe part attacking Asian women. We should try not to make more hate and problems. There are wonderful Asian girls too. We need less racism towards Asians, not more. Our daughters will be Asian/white mixed girls. Let’s not be the inverse of white dads with Asian women that push their Asian sons to only date other Asians while encouraging their daughters to date white.
You’re doing great supporting people that need it! Please stick to the part that’s great and don’t also spread hate 😊

No you troll Lu. WMAF/XMAF are not equal to AMWF/AMXF. I'm happy the post opener called out that Lululemon larper on her stupidity.
BAD (Big Asian Dick) Boy are genuinely loved.

How do you go about dating if your over 21+ but you rely on parents for transportation
Hi. I am an individual with multiple disabilities/health conditions (including anxiety adhd and possible autism) and I’m 25. I was wondering how you go about dating if you rely on your parents for transportation. Unfortunately I have a condition that causes limited depth perception so I am not sure driving is the best option for me and I’m also afraid to learn even though my doctors say it wouldn’t hurt to learn. I also have t1 diabetes. Unfortunately I live in a rural area with limited transportation options too. Given that I am My mother’s only child she is very overprotective of me (and the few friends I have always comment this). However, she does talk about me moving out but I’m almost certain she wouldn’t let that happen because she’s over protective even though we fight all the time. I should also clarify that I love my mother and she can be my friend but she’s also very overprotective (I think?)
Case in point: I needed to get somewhere the other night and neither my parents (my father seems to think my mom is the only one who needs to drive me around sometimes) could take me, and I put it out on fb (just my friends list) that I needed a ride but my mom saw it and said I’m not letting you get in car with someone I don’t know. I mean I wouldn’t have gotten a ride from a murderer…but she yelled at me and made me take it down. Thankfully I did get a text from a family member that they could take me where I needed to go. But that incident made me think what if I met a guy on a dating site and we clicked but I needed a ride to get there and my mom said no. I mean dating is part of how I would move out, but I’m not sure my mother understands that online dating is how the majority of people meet these days. I don’t feel like my mom is abusing me or necessarily being mean but she’s just way over protective. I do plan to bring this up with my therapist as well. Does anyone have any ideas?

Hello reddit I'm a 27 year old female that has just realized I have been through narcisitic abuse from my father and im struggling alot and it feels so tangled and confusing. So I want to give my background and explain my situation. I grew up with my mom my dad and my brother. My mom is a colder person she dosent like intimacy as much and she had a tendency to be unfaithful to my dad. growing up she would butt heads with me alot and almost seem jelous of me and my dad's relationship. My dad would spend alot of time with me but I realize now most of our hanging out was always centered on what he wanted to do and his mood always depended on our behaviour and our compliance to every thing he said. It was like the more you sucked up to him and agreed with everything he said, he would treat you better. My mom wouldn't do this and my brother wouldn't do this and he was always much meaner to them. I noticed as a kid that as soon as I didn't agree with what he said or if I was uncomfortable doing something I was emotionally abused, words like "selfish" "lazy" "useless" imprinted into my head. I did everything to be perfect I'd discard my self everytime I walked through the door to see him I loved him so much and I wanted him to love me. I always grew up being told my mom was the bad guy she was bitchy naggy crazy and unfaithful of course. Looking back yeah she was cold and didn't like hugs she wouldn't take me on fun excursions but she seemed more interested in my life and who I was then him. But god did I hate her growing up I felt like she was the reason dad was miserable she was ruining him after all. I would imput my self into there arguments and yell at her and side with him he had me trained well at a young age. My brother who I believe may have been the scape goat in childhood was always fighting with him and bold about his beliefs and you can kinda tell where that went, no affection talking shit about him to me. So fast forward to my adult years my mom finally moved to her home country 5 years ago. I'm living with my dad again but a huge thing that became apparent to me as an adult Is he makes horrible choices he is incredibly uncaring about us emotionally. And when he does things for us feels like he's making a long list of I owe yous. The love feels incredibly conditional, as soon as he's challenged he goes nuts and will threaten to kick us out or threaten to never help us. I'm almost convinced he dosent know any thing about me. I've been so conditioned to shut up that I dont argue push back I still just do what ever he says. If he hurts my feelings he says "you know me this is who I am".
Now how this Has left me. I'm incredibly people pleasing
I keep making friends with people that put me down and use me and i feel stuck in these relationships. It's like a prison.
I have been stuck working part time at a grocery store for 10 years because I'm terrified and I don't know who I am, I'm also afraid of people.
I'm in university but I feel lost, I have switched career ideas 1000 times and I have debt to show it. I did decide to go for a soical services certificate to try to speed up getting a better job to get out of here.
I'm incredibly emotionally unstable, I struggle with critisim
A big one is i feel like I can't be my self around anyone it's make me forget who I am because of masking constantly. It feels like a head prison.
This is filled with ramble and run on sentences but it is so much to even put on reddit it would be like a bible sized book.
I just feel so lost and afraid and I want to find my self and not let this ruin my life.
Oh yeah side note he would triangulate the crap out of us. He'd loudly talk shit about us to our mom so we could year it and vice versa with all family members. Me and my brother are so close now and we leave him out of so much I think it gets to him.
How can I heal what should I do I don't have enough money to leave my car is on its end and I just want to feel Like my self and not a shell.

Before we get to the offer I wish to give you some background about myself - My name is Dominik, I'm a personal trainer and a nutrition consultant, as well as a powerlifter. I have been doing this with joy for over 10 years now and wish to share that knowledge further on with as many as I can. I don't find it appropriate to advertise my pages here, but for those who want proof, feel free to snoop my reddit post history.
There you can also find my previous posts here on slavelabour that were all well received, which hopefully provides some form of assurance and credibility that I respond and deliver to everybody as fast and efficiently as I can.
Now back to the topic! I'm offering three 60 day meal plan variations - a 1200, 2000 and a 2800 calorie version. Each day of the meal plans is unique and has 5 meals, so in total you're getting 300 different meal ideas - no two will be completely the same. There are no supplements in the meal plan, so there's no meals like "1 scoop of protein powder".
These plans are made of natural foods that can be found in every decently equipped grocery store, with a couple of 'cheat-ish' ones to add some extra variety. The meals won't be complicated to make, nor won't take a lot od time to prepare, and only require basic cooking and seasoning skills. Every ingredient as well as meal has its macronutrient values precisely calculated to one decimal and of course listed next to it.
There are more complex, as well as very simple meals, and due to an easy to read design it's also very simple to switch meals up if you don't like certain ones.
If you only decide to only get one of the meal plans, It's yours for 5$, file format is PDF.
I can send you a sample day, so you can get an idea on how the full meal plan will look like and to make it easier for you to decide if you'd like it or find useful.
For an additional 10$ I'll also write you a fully personalized training plan for your physique goals. We'll go through a detailed questionnaire about your current situation, lifestyle, goals, injuries to work around etc. Based on the anwsers I'll write and send you a detailed training plan within 48 hours, including;

• Your current statistics overview and recommended action steps
  
• A detailed workout routine based on your current situation and lifestyle, with a solid progression system, assuring consistent and measurable results
  
• In-depth instructions on how to correctly and safely perform each exercise
  
• A proposed cardio training plan
  
• A dynamic pre-workout stretching routine to keep your trainings safe
  
• A static post-workout stretching routine for a more efficient recovery
  
• Additional notes about nutrition - how and when to change your calories so you don't stall and always keep progressing towards your goals
  
• A personalized training progress calender where you'll be able to log in your progress and stay motivated to continue
  

I always respond to everyone, if you have any questions, don't be afraid to ask. I'll try to respond as soon as I can, but if I don't do it right away it most likely means I'm working with my clients or it's night time here.
Cheers!

23rd: Jane Bright (Nicaragua - 6th)

A deserving, incredible Survivor endgame level character standing next to Jane Bright.
u/SMC0629:
I don't have Jane in my personal endgame, but I'm not mad at all that she made it here. She's probably the most divisive character in Nicaragua, but I personally love her. She's got a spunky attitude, has a great rivalry with Marty, great relationship with Chase, and has one of my favorite eliminations ever. Her boot is so god damn memorable, that lasting moment of the alliance telling her it's gonna be her tonight, with Jane in complete shock and despair is just perfect. One of the best characters of Nicaragua for sure.
~
u/DryBonesKing:
Jane is on a very small list of players who I think has run the entire spectrum in terms of where they land in my rankings. Top ten, top hundred, middle of the pack, bottom hundred, bottom ten… I think I understand pretty much every Jane take known to humanity, cause I’ve had them. Nowadays, I tend to lean more positive on her, but I definitely still have too many issues I’m hyper aware of to let her rank too highly for me.
“What if we have Rupert’s hero edit to someone who was just really really mean, and did the bare minimum to hide it” is genuinely hilarious to me. Jane’s got good energy and her many, many, many feuds (the majority of which being with Marty) make her a great character to guide the narrative. There’s also just her boot episode, which is like… way too good of an episode for Nicaragua. I think I’m neutral-lean positive on Nicaragua, but it’s not a season that does a ton for me, but dear god, Jane’s boot and the scene of her dousing the camp fire is like so fucking metal.
She’s such a raw, powerful person. I think my biggest issue with her right now is just that, in a similar vein to Brandon Hantz, sometimes she feels a little too real at times. Like is she funny when she’s talking shit about Marty? Yes! Is the story great? Yes! But does some of what she says about Marty and his kids feel a bit too much? Yes, very much so. It’s not enough to detract from her character, but again… Brandon Hantz-tier of character. For me, that’s a pretty big compliment, but I also do not keep him in my Top 100. Same with Jane. But despite being one of the names that made Endgame that I disagree with the most, I am very curious and excited to see our resident “Least Sane Jane Bright Enjoyer” spin a tale or two about why she deserves to be up here!
Overall Rank – 138/821
~
u/Zanthosus:
While I disagree with her being endgame, I understand the reasoning and defense behind it. I respect the hustle that Tom did to get her here and I’m happy for him that Jane made her first endgame.
~
u/Regnisyak1:
I love that Jane is here, I am not even going to lie. Before my recent rewatch, I had Jane in the 200s, and after my rewatch, I was completely blown away at how complex her character is and the great relationships she had all season. To me, she felt real with her hatred, and the switch between the dry laugh we know her for, to the nasty person she became was endlessly incredible, she was such a great part of Nicaragua and one of the few praises I have for that season. Plus, when she finds out Chase, Holly, and Sash are voting for her, the music change and piano chord that happens there might be the piece media I have ever seen. Congrats Tom for getting her here!
Personal Rank: 73/821. 9/10.
~
u/ninjedi1:
Nicaragua is such a great season due to how emotionally charged it is, and Jane is a big part of that. Jane is the sweet southern lady until she feels crossed, then she has a whole vendetta against anyone who crosses her, so it's a lot of great fun. She is not in my personal endgame, but I can always appreciate a kooky character showing up in it.
~~~~~
u/Tommyroxs45:
Jane Bright:
This is undoubtedly my most anticipated write up of the rankdown, I have such a love for Jane and everything she does for Nicaragua. She has one of the best stories of all time, and just has so many moments that further it and make it cohesive. And that is what I will explain today. Jane is not just some badass southern old lady, ok well she is, but she’s also a very deep, broken old lady trying to put on a facade for herself. Her hatred towards everyone around her has its story and here it is…
The Mask
A lot like Rupert, Jane tries to paint a mask on herself as a hero and somebody who always follows her heart for the greater good. However, throughout the season we see cracks start to arise in this persona she puts on herself. She’s someone who needs a purpose and when somebody gets in the way of that, she gets insecure and bitter and that’s when we see the wrath of Jane break out.
The editors never try to pull the wool over your eyes by painting her as a hero, because they show petty rivalries with her and Marty and her boot episode meltdown. We get to see her from all angles, even if she only wants to present one. She’s insecure about herself, making her feel entitled to be treated as a queen and carried to the end due to her “heroic” manner. Once she realizes it doesn’t work like that and she actually has to play the game, all gloves come off and we get some of the most petty, uncalled for, or even bitchy moments that just have so much raw emotion.
She’s not painted as a hero while being an asshole (*cough* Ozzy *cough*) They show her as her flawed self, but they also let you make your own decision on what to feel without pushing a narrative onto you. Of course she wins Favorite Player at the reunion, so some people still thought she was a hero but you get to see this very broken and entitled person struggling. She really hates everyone but that’s not what she can show because that’s now who she wants to be and it’s such a complicated story arc throughout the season that we see the cracks grow and it’s told so subtlety but perfectly. And this is only the tip of the iceberg with how deep this old southern lady is.
Without this defining feature, she’d just be a badass southern lady but with it she becomes so much more just adding to this brilliant story building up all season until her boot episode. Her masking her real personality just makes her a much more complex character and when we see these glimpses of it, you start to realize, ohhh this is the person I’m supporting.
Even on top of the mask, there is so much more to Jane’s character…
Grief
When you watch Nicaragua for the first time, this part of her character is not inherently obvious. Grief?!? What are you talking about? She just seems like a badass until she’s a bitter old hag for being the target. While, yes that’s a very simplified version of this, there’s so much more to dissect there. The grieving of her husband, greatly plays a role in her story, and although it’s sometimes subtle you can see how it play into it so beautifully well.
In her very first confessional, what do we see Jane say?
“They think I'm some middle aged housewife that tootles around the house all day long, they’re in for a big surprise. Because that is definitely not me. I'm fifty-six years old and I'm the type person that stays busy all the time doing things. I just don't think there's anything I can't do. Winning the million dollars is real important to me ‘cause it’ll help me pay off my farm and the fact that I lost my husband, uh, in '09, it-it-it means I wouldn't have to work as hard as I do. But his spirit, I know is still with me and that's what keeps me going.”
Her husband obviously is impacting her mentally during this season, and we see this throughout the game. Every Time somebody makes a gesture that they want her out, her personal viper just breaks out. This is because she knows this is getting in the way of her dream, and the spirit of her husband that made her want to do this and she’s not letting anybody take that from her.
She’s still grieving and wants to win for her husband, and it is a very sweet story but sadly it takes a dark turn as she starts using this as entitlement for her to win. She believes she’s obligated to be brought to the end because of who she is and the loss of her husband and yeah, it’s dark but damn is it good when you think about it.
This is also why the family visit is SO important to her story in her boot episode. Right when her daughter, Ashley gets there, she starts talking about her husband and how Ashley is the one she is doing this for, to help her. This is WHO SHE IS FIGHTING FOR!
That is why it hits so hard when everyone flips on her! How dare they! She thinks. These people are voting me out right after I fought my hardest to give my daughter a better life?!? She’s one of the only I have left, this is disgusting. It’s so sad but at the same time it’s brilliantly shown not told. And what do you know, when Jane is talking about Sash’s mama raising him, she immediately brings up her daughter, just ugh how perfect does it round back to her family and her grief with loss.
Now obviously, does that make her outrage justified, I don’t know, maybe? Is she still kind of a bitch? probably! Is she a badass? Probably! That leads me to my next point.
Perspective
If you have read a lot of my other writeups on Nicaragua you would have noticed I love to talk about the perspective a lot of these characters receive on the season. Complimenting how diverse they can be seen depending on your morals or values. No character represents this better than Jane Bright.
How do I know this? Well let’s look at her placements in Rankdowns Past:
SRI - 485/501 - Seen as a bitchy, entitled, worse version of NaOnka, and someone who went way too personal in the game.
SRII - 455/537 - Seen as annoying and sour, forced fan favorite edit not giving her the trashing she deserved by the other tribemates.
SRIII - 549/575 - Seen as a narcissist and self-righteous, below the belt remarks and “a human embodiment of a rash” (that made me laugh a bit).
SRIV - 518/615 - Seen as an ultimately fascinating character, who got a dishonest edit that didn’t show her true side until the end. Ultimately ending up as an unlikable “venomous bitch” who somehow won fan favorite.
SRV - 108/653 - Seen as a great T.V personality whose kooky first half and vigorous 2nd half make for a good story and uplifts everyone around her while also being a great character.
SRVI - 127/731 (Had to be idoled to get here though smh) - Seen as a badass challenge competitor who is actually sour, who unfairly attacked Marty and is a bit too much when it comes to her toxic side to make her slightly less good.
SRVII - 185/767 - Seen as an extremely authentic personality and very entertaining to the chaos of Nicaragua, as well as having an iconic rivalry with Marty, being an iconic mother.
See the difference between one half and the other? Yeah, that shows just how well of a character she is edited as. She has so many times where she is shown to be a hero but juxtaposed with so many times she is shown as an asshole and it works off each scene perfectly. This is why we get such a difference of opinion and I think it’s told so well to where most people don’t even see it.
You have to weigh her good and bad and see based on your morals, if she’s a good person or not, and how acceptable or right was she for her constant hatred of others? I really love that as they aren’t trying to make you think a specific feeling about her. You need to come up with that conclusion yourself on how you think she is, that’s why she won the fan favorite vote in 2011 but today many call her an entitled bitch. (And yeah, she is but that’s a lot of what makes her so amazing).
Her kicking ass in challenges and being a lively spirit contrasted to her nasty demeanor to Jill and especially Marty personally attacking them and her boot episode meltdown, contribute to making one of the most wishy-washy characters when it comes to people’s opinions on her. I don’t what to be told how to feel, I want to come up with it on my own, and I feel like a lot of that has been lost in recent years of Survivor and seeing Jane and having all these different perspectives on her personality just adds so much life.
There is a reason why so many people despise her and so many people love her, she’s just edited that well to where people have had to come up with their own feelings about Jane. Not being coerced to feel a certain way, and I feel that is the best way to edit a character. What you see is what you see, not an objective stance the show is trying to put onto you, and I feel all of Nicaragua shows this but Jane is the prime example. Perspective means everything with her.
This makes her one of the most complex characters of all time, she’s either a broken woman seeking admiration, an entitled bitch, or a badass southern lady who is an inspiration. It’s all based on what you value and isn’t that what Survivor is all about, a social experiment where you weigh your values and personalities with each other to build a society.
Speaking of building a society, how is Jane’s relationships with the cast, well let’s see her main stars:
Sash: Jane and Sash’s dynamic isn’t really shown and I think that actually helps her and Sash’s story. Sash is sleazy and doesn’t really make any genuine connections and we see that in her breakdown scene. When you watch the moment she learns she’s going home and the confessional she gives, you see a direct tone shift from how she talks about Chase and how she talks about Sash. When she’s almost crying about Chase and his betrayal, she is outright vile and nasty when talking about Sash. Showing this major lack of connection between them, that she never saw him as a friend and will not hold back from releasing her rage on him.
Chase: Jane and Chase’s connection is one for the books. Both being from North Carolina and being southern types, they instantly bond and feel close to each other. Their relationship just feels more special than anyone else’s that season, that’s what makes the betrayal so much more entertaining. You literally see her about to cry over Chase, they really were close and got to know each other and just to have him stab her in the back, it’s so good. It just felt special but it wasn’t enough for him to not cut her…
Now how could you talk about relationships and not bring up Jane’s defining one…
Fartay:
Come on! This rivalry is one of if not the best rivalry in all of Survivor. They just despise each other and really are either of them in the right? Not at all, that’s what makes it so great. Marty’s a sleazeball, cocky, and a smart ass while Jane’s an entitled, bitter, old lady and they just work so well off each other. You just have personal jab after personal jab that is just so entertaining and perfectly helps tell Jane’s story.
There is really no reason why they should hate each other as much as they do but their walks of life and personalities just clash so hard that you still understand why they hate each other. Jane takes everything Marty does to heart without any grain of salt, and it makes her reactions so visceral and truly legendary. It’s what makes Jane the Jane we love to love or love to hate!
Now, I think it’s time to talk about the pinnacle of Jane. Her magnum opus if you will… her boot episode.
The Wrath of Jane Will Break Out Tonight
This is one of my favorite episodes of Reality TV. Everything about it is perfect and told in such a way to where it’s the perfect ending for such a broken character.
Building her up with her daughter coming during the family visit, talking about her and how much she wants to provide for her. Having a seed planted in Jane’s brain after she’s not taken to the reward thinking she was entitled to be brought.
Fabio winning immunity, throwing everything for a loop, just when Jane’s attitude has really started to shift and then we get to the scene. Which personally is my favorite scene in all of Survivor without a doubt. The scene where the alliance tells her it has changed and she’s going home is so brilliant. The raw awkwardness and silence next to Jane’s utter disbelief and anger. After she flips them off it is followed by again my favorite confessional of all time.
This is what she has been building up to, everything just falls about when she believed she deserved to win. Having such raw and unfiltered emotions where she’s about to break down and cry and then the turn to anger and fury bringing Sash’s mother into it, talking about how she raised a damn liar. (WITH THAT HEAD COCK THOUGH) All with very subtle sound effects or just no music at all until she gets up and makes one last hoorah by pouring water on the fire. “I started and I put it out” 🔥🔥🔥
Then we get to tribal, where Jane is just done with the bullshit and just calls everyone out for being liars and backstabbers. “The writings on the wall Fabio!” Like come on, that is TV gold, followed by the vote having Chase and Sash “cowardly” play their idols sticking it to Jane when she is already at her lowest by not even having her vote count. She leaves bitter and broken, not the happy ending she felt she deserved.
Mortgage Gate
I’m putting this here because that’s where it best fits, and this is brief because it doesn’t really affect my rankings on Jane because it’s not in the season.
I wish they did show this though, as having this added layer of controversy between Sash and Jane with real world implications would have been amazing, even if what Jane is saying isn’t true it still would’ve shown her as an ass, making up lies just to make someone look worse. I just think it’s such an interesting topic to discuss that I wanted to give it its own section. Sash is sleazy so I wouldn’t pass him to do that, however Jane is extremely bitter and entitled so I could also see her making that up, I guess we'll never really know will we… (I know Marty called the incident fake, but it’s Marty, of course he’s gonna dispute whatever Jane says, if she says the sky is blue, he’ll say it’s orange).
I'm Not Breaking My Tile!
This kind of relates to the mask section of this write up. However, I wanted to talk specifically about Jane’s challenge prowess and wins throughout the season and how much it adds to this arc. Building her up as this badass figure competing against big guys half her age and actually winning?!? It gives an excellent face to the real Jane, having this much courage to go against Chase and Fabio even after winning, not only being such a badass in that moment but showing how she’s trying to play up this persona of old challenge great.
Jane, The Tribe Has Spoken
So in conclusion, you can see that when you really glance over Nicaragua you don’t see Jane as some sort of deep character. However, when you really look into her and her actions and motives you see a broken old lady who is obviously grieving. She is such a deep and complex character that Nicaragua needed to really round out the story.
Jane isn’t supposed to be this likable hero, nor is she supposed to be a villain, she’s not edited as one archetype. However you value your morals, is how you will see Jane and even if you find her an ass, you have to admit they tell it very well. She’s also objectively entertaining, her rivalry with Marty, her being badass during challenges, cooking fish in the woods, her boot episode meltdown, and so much more are just so iconic to me and make this season what it is.
This write up obviously won’t sway everybody, but I hope that if you rewatch Nicaragua, take a closer look at Jane and her actions and see how it lines up with somebody like Rupert or Coach who are much more prevalent when it comes to these “entitled, broken, facade” archetypes. You will see a brilliant story of grief, hatred, entitlement, and a fake persona that the show knows she is trying to present.
Personally, Jane will always be one of my favorite characters of all time with amazing scenes and a story almost as complex as Ian’s. She didn’t win this rankdown, but she won my heart and has definitely earned herself a #1 spot on my rankings for this endgame.
SMC0629: 19
DryBonesKing: 21
Zanthosus: 24
Tommyroxs45: 1
Regnisyak1: 20
DavidW1208: 24
ninjedi1: 24
Average Placement: 19.000
Total Points: 133
Standard Deviation: 8.206 (2nd Highest)

There is no longer any reason or excuse for any subreddit to platform any abusive material any longer.

Hate speech, violent threats, harassment, Non-Consensual Intimate Media (NCIM), Child Sex Abuse Media (CSAM) - don’t belong here - and you can take private action to ensure they’re kicked off and kept off the site.
Reddit now allows people to file private, anonymous reports on this content - reports filed in a way that prevents advertising the existence of abusive content to others, that prevents amplifying it.
In September 2023, Reddit, Inc. finally closed the loop and took responsibility for preventing abuse of their platform.
Now it’s up to all of us to hold them to their promises.
You can:

• report individual posts and comments using the “Report” button on the item;
• use https://reddit.com/report;
• report user profiles that have abusive names or profile pictures or biographies;
• report entire subreddits and their moderator teams using a Formal Moderator Complaint (see below).

These reports aren’t public; They can’t be used by abusers to amplify their harms; They prevent amplifying harm to the abusers’ targets and victims. And - The abusers can’t target you for revenge or harassment for filing these reports.

If you find a subreddit that is:

* Promoting Hatred;

* Distributing Non-Consensual Intimate Media or Child Sexual Abuse Material;

or

* Promoting Community Interference with Other Subreddits —

Report those subreddits: https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/requests/new?ticket_form_id=19300233728916

If you find a subreddit that is recreating a banned subreddit (Ban Evasion Subreddit):

Report that subreddit: https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/360058315692-How-do-I-report-a-community-I-suspect-of-ban-evasion

Don’t post here about them; don’t post elsewhere about them - doing so helps the abusers amplify their harms, and paints a target on you - and in the case of NCIM and CSAM, telling people where to find them is likely to be criminal.

Cut off the Oxygen of Amplification.

Report things to the Reddit Admins. Privately. Not Here.

If you’re leaving a hate group and need help to escape, Life After Hate has resources to help you

⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂
^{Don’t modmail us asking to join or be approved to post. We’re remaining open as a warning, a library, of how bad it could be - (that you must kick the Nazis out of the bar, promptly, or it will become the Nazi bar} - and to push Reddit to deal with the few remaining misfeasant and malfeasant subreddit operator teams which are clearly targeting vulnerable demographics for hatred. And Just In Case something unforeseen happens.)
^{Instead of asking to post here: Go file some anonymous reports. And then go live life.}
⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂
^{This post is automatically being reposted because Reddit collapses stickied posts and sometimes hides them, which prevents us from leaving one stickied post on the subreddit to explain things. Reddit: Fix your horrible UI design decision.}
⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂
^{This post is a message … and part of a system of messages … pay attention to it! Sending this message was important to us.
This subreddit is not a place of honor … no highly esteemed deed is commemorated here … nothing valued is here.
What is here is dangerous and repulsive to us. This message is a warning about danger.}

We know that each of the 3 depicted Wizards in the stories had different personalities. The Istari had free will and had experienced thousands of years in the world, visiting different locales, different peoples and cultures. But one key factor in their personality is usually the Valar they followed or where associated with.
Curumo (Saruman) belonged to Aule. You can see that in Saruman's desire for order, and his propensity for creation and "industry". Mauron (Sauron) was also a servant of Aule, and share many of those characteristics. Both Maiar desire for power and authority could come from that desire for order and creation of such order. There's a lot of pride in there as well, being "makers of things".
Olorin (Gandal) was a favorite of Manwe, and that was reflected in his free, traveling spirit, his wisdom and his compassion for all intelligent beings in Middle-Earth.
Aiwendil (Rhadagast) was a servant of Yavanna, and that explains his love for nature. He's carefree and disinterested in the affairs of most intelligent beings because, much like Yavanna, his interests fell in nature itself, long lasting, hard to change.
And what of the Blue Wizards? We know that Alatar was a servant of Órome, chosen to attend the council of Valar to decide who to send to Middle Earth.
Two Maiar in that meeting volunteered. Curumo and Alatar. The former took Aiwendil with him becaue Yavanna begged him to, and Alatar asked to take his friend Pallando with him (his affiliation we don't know, but considering they're both "blue wizards" he could also have been a servant of Orome). Manwe insisted that Olorin also be sent, thus making 5 wizards.
This tells us that Alatar is probably either brave or brash, having enough courage and maybe pride to step forward. Being a servant of Orome that makes sense. Orome hated all dark things and hunted the beasts that served Melkor relentlessly. I imagine we could see a similiar attitude out of the Blue Wizards. The Istari were tasked taking the forms of old men, and to seek to only influence humanity instead of taking direct action over it. To influence, not to lead. To teach, not do it themselves. But most of these were guidelines. And it doesn't really address the dark beasts. It was Olorin's (Galdalf's) way to not pursue direct conflict. But even he fought in the war against Orcs. And what of the servants of Orome, a proud and easy to anger hunting God?
Conclusion. If it had been Alatar that came up against Smaug I imagine he would've wanted to punch that dragon in the face, no Dwarves necessary. We can picture him traveling in the East kicking ass and taking names. Afterall Tolkien did give him a different name later on. Morinehtar (Darkness Slayer).
If we were to believe that only Gandalf succeeded in his mission, it could well be that Alatar "failed" not because he succumbed to the desire to install order and authority over living things (like Saruman), or to the inaction of nature (like Rhadagast), but to the wrath of Orome, the desire to fight darkness himself, maybe leading him to rule over men as not a guide, but as a ruler.
TL:DR = The Blue Wizards (or maybe just Alatar) were chosen of Orome. This, coupled with what we know of them (Alatar volunteering, the maybe both failing their mission, leading cults of men, etc) means that Alatar (and maybe Pallando) were no-nonsense monster slaying, Dragon hunting, giant spider stomping, Istari.

Are wa tenshi no koe!

"Temple — The Communicator — Pancakes"

Extra Info and Links

ANN MAL TV Tropes Wikipedia

Comment of the Day!!

StardustGoetia has been tricked into believing the Haibane propaganda!

All the talk about how the Haibane are not allowed to have new goods, or how they can't leave or communicate with outsiders, makes things sound rather insidious. The shopkeeper seemed nice enough, though, and all the Haibane seem pretty friendly. (The idea kind of reminds me of the Pig Liver show from a couple seasons ago, except the execution here is decidedly better.)

JustAnswerAQuestion has been nosing through their dvd extras which amusingly dates the anime so well. Can you imagine back when Ai Yori Aoshi or Sakura Taisen were new!?

Pulled out some of my DVDs (couldn't find DVD right away, which apparently has extras.)
DVD 1 came with a big insert booklet full of character info, and messages to the the consumer! Typing the text into google doesn't give any hits, sorry.
DVD 1 extras: NC OP, Japanese OP (they use a really nice font), the previews, which I don't think were even in my fansubs. There's an art gallery not just of the characters, but every day objects like Reki's lighter and medical kit.
Previews for Sakura Taisen Gekijouban, Ai Yori Aoshi, Chobits (oo-oo! oo-oo! dakishimetainoni), Tiny Snow Fairy Sugar, Gatekeepers 21, Lupin the 3rd (TMS), Patlabor WXIII, Master Keaton, Heat Guy J, Live Action Saikyou no Onmyouji, L/R Licensed By Royal

QotD

• Hikari is becoming dangerously close to going from Angel to little devil!! How shall we correct this lost child!?
• What do you suppose Haibane halo are actually made out of?
• What are your current thoughts on the Renmei? They look after the girls but leave strict demands and boss them around right?
• Do you feed strays when able? Would you grudge an adorable little crow, fox, trash panda, or Kuu their midday snack?
• What's the one food you can never get yourself to eat? It's fine to be immature, we're adults and are perfectly capable of acknowledging out shortcomings~
• It is really that bad to have a constant smell of bread about you? Does Rakka sound more tasty when she stinks of freshly baked bread?

Abyssbringer's "What is the thematic purpose of this scene corner!!"

Vaadwaur speaks from experience.

The prompt is the reminder of that feeling you have when you wake up after a pub crawl and realize you don't know what city you are in.

Yesterday's Prompt!

Today's Prompt!

Tomorrow's Prompt

If you strain your ears, you can probably hear it.

Hi guys, lately I've been toying with the idea of starting a company to do freelancing web development/design work and web hosting for local businesses. I am confident that my technicals skills and experience are good enough that I can offer value to potential clients if I price my services right. However, I've never actually freelanced before (I have ~ 5 years experience programming professionally in corporate/SaaS data analysis and devOps settings), so I was hoping to see if anyone one this sub might be willing to share some relevant experiences and tips.
I live in a rural area with a ski/tourism industry people use for marketing, so my general idea is that I want my "company" to be able to build "custom" (which can mean a lot of different things) websites for small businesses in my area and beyond with Tailwind and my favorite CMS. I've even gotten as far as designing a logo. I get kind of apprehensive with some of the next steps in figuring stuff out.
For context, I am currently employed at my family's small IT firm (full situation is long story). I've been doing backend/db work and overhauling various web properties. Importantly, the projects I've been working on recently have been internal, so my (recent) portfolio is basically just app/sites me or my family own. I feel a little weird about that. But anyway, I do have a lot of flexibility (almost too much so) and spare cycles depending on the week... I want to be able to pick up more work in a controlled manner when I want.
One big issue for for me is that I have no clue how to price my services hourly. When I take my meds and I know what I need/want to do, I can be very efficient. But I tend to be a very non-linear person in terms of productivity and creativity, so I think pricing and estimating times will be tough for me (especially since I've never delivered in this context). Any tips on handling this area? It seems like making some choices here might be important in terms of defining my whole business model.
I also don't know how much design work I am trying to do (I'm not really trained classically in that area), but I do see investing in my design skills as worthwhile given that I tend to be a non-linear person anyway. I guess I sort of want to put myself in a position where non-linear creativity is understood and valued instead of punished.
Any tips on preventing scope creep (or at least accounting for it in how you plan projects)? I think this will be important for me.
Are there any other potential pitfalls or traps I should be aware of as a freelancer with adhd?
For those who have done a lot of freelancing work, do you find it more or less "accommodating" (not the right word but I can't think of anything better) of your working style with ADHD than a straight corporate job? It seems like freelancing could be good for my lifestyle, but how do you guys set boundaries?
I have heard of people running "full-service web agencies" and then going back to solo freelance dev work because they like it more, so I was wondering if anyone here had any thoughts about comparing those two work situations from an ADHD perspective. I think I could be cooking with gas if I were working with a frontend person faster than me lol.
Are there any resources for new freelancers/contractors that I should check out?
Anyway, sorry for the wall of text and asking so many questions, but I appreciate any advice here anyone can offer... between ADHD and vision issues, I don't really want to go back to a corporate/office job if I can figure out other options! Thanks y'all!

Literally everything I've done I got depression last December and after that I realized I wasted over 4 years of my whole life because of covid only until 2023 I started a YouTube channel to keep me busy but around November things started to get bland I wanted to try and play some Minecraft as it was the only thing that never got stale during covid I played a lot of Mineplex made a lot of friends but that's when I found out it was taken down then I just stopped playing anything or even doing anything I was just sitting there in my bed doing nothing for almost 3 months until the near end of December where I decided to change things up and make the best of it and decided to start doing things but during those 3 months I was just scrolling through YouTube and basically saw everything I wanted to try prior to not doing anything after that everything new that I never saw before didn't get me excited like a new update for a game or something it just felt bland then my favorite game geometry dash I didn't want to spend any time doing anything anymore I would spend hours doing something nonstop just for a reward before but then I just didn't feel like doing it what's the point so I decided to try and work on my YouTube but I have no content to do because I don't want to spend time doing anything because it gets boring after a few minutes I've only uploaded 11 videos during that time but they weren't good only 300 fews which I'm happy with but I don't want to do anything for content I tried watching anime I got bored I tried making music it got boring I tried playing online Minecraft it got stale I tried everything I just cant do anything this is really putting a toll on my life not to mention i also caught mysophobia which prevented me from wanting to go outside the last thing that could've helped me I was finally getting ready to interact socially but then I got that stupid phobia I was actually going to make content about my Minecraft world but I accidentally deleted it because of Mojang counted a stupid held click as a single click I'm in limbo I feel like there's nothing I can do

So, the school year is ending. We're in 8th grade and about to go to high school next year. I've known them since the beginning of 7th, and liked them since December of that year. Then I lost feelings around the summer, but it came back a few months ago, and isn't going away. We've been in choir together for the past two years, and our school has one class for each choir, and we've always been at the same level, so we've been guaranteed a class together. Next year, they aren't doing it, because there's a lot more opportunities and credits and stuff like that, and I totally understand, but I'm worried that we won't stay connected. I honestly don't care if we end up together or not, I just don't want to lose them as a friend.
Like, I wouldn't be that worried if we were best friends, but you know how people spread apart in junior high/high school, and we aren't extremely close, but we've known each other for a while and know each others pasts and how to make each other laugh and generally just get each other. So we'd probably slowly drift apart if we didn't have a class together.
Of course there are other chances besides choir, but it's not guaranteed, and I have audhd (autism and ADHD) and I feel like I need that security.
And I don't feel like this is a crush. I've had crushes on people before, and it's never been as extreme as this. Or I never liked guys in the first place, which seems unlikely, but you get the point. I'm so scared that I'll lose them. Or confess and it doesn't end up well.
Here's the thing, I probably would confess to them if I was more confident in myself. But they're so perfect, and I'm not; I don't have clear skin, I can be an asshole sometimes, and I don't think they like me. But I'm so scared of losing them as a friend, and that could happen with both confessing and just generally drifting apart.
I only have 3 and a half more days left of this year. That could be it, plus texting our schedules to each other when we find them out. I might practically never talk to them again. And that's terrifying.
And I've always felt the need to be in a relationship, like, I feel like that's the only way I could really feel confident about myself. Friends or family tell you that you look good, there's a decent chance they're lying. But when someone that you love, someone that's told you they love you, says it, it's believable. That's how I see it. But I can not see myself in a relationship with my friend, and I could feel the same amount of love for someone else, but they'd still be in my mind. And no one would like me anyways, I haven't had someone tell me they seriously liked me since last November (I realized I liked them sometime after I broke up with my girlfriend at the time).
Should I go for it? Should I try out an actual relationship next year and see how I feel, if I still like them and are ready to confess, or if I don't and would rather stick with the person I'd be with? Cause I honestly don't know what to do.
TLDR: pretty sure I'm in love with my friend, scared of losing them when we aren't guaranteed classes next year. Should I try being in a relationship with someone else to feel good about myself, or just go for it and see what happens, with the high chance of losing them?

I have a friend; she/he is nice and really kalog naman kaso everything should always be about hehim and everyone should adjust for hehim. The thing is she's /he's a "bat b!tch", bawal siya ang last to message in conversations. You have to reply from time to time (fast replier ka dapat) or else, magtatampo siya and magagalit for not being able to give back the same energy she's/he's giving. Honestly, at first, it was just harmless eh, so nag-aadjust kami, not until you have to talk to hehim and mag-adjust EVERY FUCKING DAY! :') She/he can really get petty & toxic like that, even to the point where she/he knows na you're going through something and you need space, pero you still have to be there for hehim and reply to everything she/he has na, of course, about hehim again. It's just tiring and draining, and I hate that she/he makes me feel bad about myself because of it...

Hey I ordered a ton of perfume during a mental breakdown. Here are my thoughts on some of them.
— Black-Hearted Tart —
We Fell In Love In October (Fluffy, hot off the griddle pancakes topped with butter and smothered in golden maple syrup. Accompanied by a side of spiced baked apples with notes of nutmeg, cinnamon, and ginger): Buttercream, cinnamon yankee candle, nothing. That’s the extent of my journey. Honestly, it’s fine, it’s a very inoffensive fall scent, if you want to smell like you’ve crushed a craft store on your wrist it’s great, but a lot is missing. If notes are a choir, the cinnamon has a megaphone. Honestly, I’ve been looking for a good pancake or waffle scent for a while, and this misses the mark. 3/5, not bad at all, but not was I was looking for and definitely not fit to wear yet in the Hell Summer I have coming up.
Potential Practical Uses:

• Gifting to people who still use the word “spoopy”
• School bake-sale days
• Smoking cigarettes on the roof

Boys Wanna Be Her (Uplifting basil and bergamot add freshness. Enhanced with an earthy blend of buddha wood and oak moss. Tonka bean and white patchouli evoke a bohemian vibe): Boys Wanna Be Clean too, apparently, because the crux of this frag is SOAP, lots of it, and nothing but it. I have no clue where it’s coming from based on the notes, but it’s undeniably suds. It smells like those industrial strength white bars. Like “I just worked a twelve hour shift and the first thing I did when I got home was scrub myself down so hard my nose forgot what work smelled like.” This would probably be great for layering, come to think of it, but I like “violently clean” scents and will probably wear it on its own anyway. 3.5/5 if you’re like me and soap is a comfort scent, or if you’re some kind of Patron Saint of Laundry Detergent, you’d probably like this too.
Potential Practical Uses:

• Showing up Febreeze
• Infiltrating rich person bathrooms where the shower has fifty nozzles that move and every surface is marble
• Feeling peppy and awake on mornings where you just want to crash

— OSMOFOLIA —
Finally A Star (The glitz of cardamom and sparkling grapefruit stars, outer space ozone, dreamy tuberose, searing gunpowder, and a ham hock for a head): I’m so mad that this is good. The joke with my IRL friends regarding this order was “you know I wasn’t in a good place when I made this purchase because I got ham perfume.” And I'm the joke now, because I ended up liking it a lot. Like, this is currently the only Osmo frag that has ever worked on me, and I’ve tried a sizable chunk of their library. (Seriously, I was going to include another perfume of theirs to compare and contrast, but everything I said felt too mean.) To make matters worse, you can definitely smell the ham and the gunpowder in the beginning! It’s in the background behind a really juicy grapefruit note, but it’s present. Part of the way this perfume was sold to me were reviews that assured me the ham was more of a bacon note, but no. This is honey baked ham. Deli-core. But the grapefruit note is so juicy that it takes over and makes it manageable. It’s pretty and weird and vaguely delicious and I’m worried someone will try to take a bite out of my facemeat when I wear this, but I will wear it. 3.5/5, I guess?
Potential Practical Uses:

• Ill-advised bereavement meals
• Going poolside but your bathing suit is hotdog-themed
• Happily single manic pixie dream girls

— Sorcellerie Apothecary—
Cake For Breakfast (Birthday cake, ripe mango, pineapple, coffee, maple syrup, and a hint of cardamom): Okay, I get it, coffee doesn’t like my skin. This is a bitter burnt caramel on me, though according to my friends with working noses, it reads more vanilla to them. I wish I could get what they got: as the day goes on, it started pulling borderline savory on me. It’s like… okay, you know when you make pancakes and little drops of batter get stuck to the pan? And then they stay there and slowly burn into little balls of ash? It smells like the process of that happening, but someone is chugging coffee syrup. I can’t say I got the mango or pineapple, which I was kinda pulling for; there’s a possibility it was there in the opening, but I also could have been hallucinating considering how fast it vanished. I’m giving it a 2/5, I can’t fully say it’s bad, especially because the drydown is okay if you like your caramel overdone, but I don’t think I’ll be keeping this.
Potential Practical Uses:

• Manifesting disappointment
• Becoming the exhausted diner waitress you’ve always dreaded being
• Reconnaissance in Seattle

Your Girlfriend Is A Badass (Yellow cake with fudge icing, oakmoss, Himalayan cedar, forest floor): By all accounts, this shouldn’t have worked. I hate chocolate as a perfume note, because it tends to go tootsie roll on me, and I’m not the biggest fan of yellow cake because vanilla is a death note, and “forest floor” implies dirt, which I’m also not an enjoyer of. This is all to say I honestly don’t know what possessed me to buy this, but I’m extremely glad it did because I’m in love. When they say fudge icing, they mean it: it didn’t go cheap or artificial on me, it was honest to god chocolate the whole time. I know “I wanted to lick my wrist” is a cliche in reviews, but it did smell like my arm was edible. That dirt note is prominent, but it works in harmony with the chocolate and gives the whole thing depth. As it dries down, an unexpected party joins: incense. I can’t name which exactly, but it has undeniable headshop vibes to it. It sounds weird, especially because it’s not in the notes (unless this is just Sorce’s base), but it works. It’s like… a joint retirement cake between Joni Mitchell and Walt Whitman. Or like you’re making s'mores in a log cabin with a bunch of your stoner friends who super aren’t going to die to a slasher later. It’s definitely greater than the sum of its parts, and pretty much seals the deal on me crawling back to Sorcellerie for another order. 4.5/5, easy, would annoy the Haunted Forest No One Should Step Foot In for cake again.
Potential Practical Uses:

• Tracking down the man who killed your parents
• Hiking on a cold Midwest evening, alone with your thoughts
• Daphne specifically

Edit: I bilged out all the standing water in the trunk now im waiting to see if i can get another jump to try and start. I cant find the starter where i have been directed to look (passenger side of the engine) I'd like to be able to find it so I can wrack it a little when I try and start it up.
For context: It started fine when I left work last night. I stopped for groceries and it wouldn't start when I came out. The store was closing as it's after 10pm so I left it over night.
Relevant information: 2000 Lincoln LS has battery in trunk. Bought a new battery less than a year ago and replaced an old terminal 6-7 months ago. The trunk collects water where the spare tire goes and it rained today but I don't know if the battery is close enough to be affected maybe though? Since replacing the terminal it hasn't shown any signs of electrical or battery issues and these are the first symptoms.
When I left work it started like normal. When I tried to leave the grocery store it didn't turn over it just made the clicking sounds of trying to start. My lights and dash came on and my car alarm went off like when there's a battery connection issue while you have the door open. After a few times trying to start and messing with the battery my lights were dimming and the clicking sound of it was less frequent. Some passers by helped me to try and jump start it and while my battery was connected to theirs all my lights and my car alarm were active and the car would ALMOST try and turn over but instead just the clicking sound would happen. Left it to charge for about 5 minutes and same results. When I removed the cables from my car and tried again this time NO clicking sound and NO lights or anything as if my battery was all the way dead after just having it hooked up to another car.
I just need any and all tips or advice on how I can get this car running in the morning asap so I doesn't get towed away. My hope is it's something simple and small seeing as how it's hasn't had any other symptoms until this.
PLEASE HELP.
If I need to add more information I'll make a new post.

I know there's also her perspective of the situation but I'll try to be as neutral as possible because I want honest opinions.
I (M30) was dumped by my gf (27F). I gave her my all and I'm feeling terrible. We had an on-off relationship for several months. At first when we dated I was able to set boundaries, but this changed. Before forming a relationship she asked me if she should be worried I'm seeing some other girl, I thought it was cute and assured her she didn't have to worry and asked her the same thing to which she responded "of course not". Several weeks later she became cold and distant. I confronted her when she was out drinking with a friend she didn't want to tell me who it was and asked "are you seeing somebody else?" to which she responded that her feelings for me had disappeared and she wants to cut off contact with me to go see other guys. I said "Ok bye."
Post forward a month, my feelings started to rise for her during the time I was away from her and my thoughts started wandering. "What if I wasn't comitted enough?", "did she think I was with her only for the sex?" and so on.. I had to contact her and find out. She agreed to meet me, we met and she said she missed me and so we started dating again. It was all lovey dovey just like before til' she became cold some weeks later again. Until this point I had been acting great towards her, not taken a wrong step at all. She tried to break up with me out of nowhere because she said she had to work on herself and I was shocked, I told her I would offer her unconditional love, support her mental health journey and even spilled the thought I would be ready to move to her city in the future because she had been sending signals she wanted that. This night she cried, told me how much she hated herself, was unlovable and had a history of seeking attention from guys but not anymore. She then wanted to try to make things work and that she would not flee from the situation because she was fearing commitment. I felt I lost self-respect and let go of my pride to save the relationship.
The following week I was hurt and cold towards her thinking I couldn't accept being treated like this, that this cycle will only repeat over and over again, her behaviour wasn't healthy and mine was neither since I'm allowing her to keep doing this. I watched videos on Youtube and stumbled upon a video about how to date someone with Borderline (later on I realized she probably didn't have that diagnosis) and got my hopes up to keep trying because I'm not a quitter and really like her. I thought her sudden changes in feelings and behaviour towards me was a repeating defense mechanism. Since I was now acting colder for the first time because I was hurt and ready to leave her if this behaviour continued she cried out she wanted to have a serious relationship with me and didn't want to lose me. I asked her if she was willing to build love, respect and trust and she said yes. We had a serious talk where I told her I didn't want to be used because I saw the risk of being that and she agreed that would not happen. Prior to our meetup she had planned on seeing her friend who is a guy but she cancelled it to prioritize seeing me and fix things.
At this point I was invested in the relationship and honestly felt a bit traumatized by it all. I had a bad feeling about her snaping and texting with alot of different guy friends. I was worried and reacted bad as soon as I saw a guy's name pop up on her phone screen. She ensured me it was only friends and I had a hard time trusting that at first. It took some time and convincing for me to feel cool with it and then I let go. She met this friend (who has confirmed romantic feelings towards her) of hers alone at his place drinking some wine but I wasn't really worried anymore and trusted her since she said she's feeling guilty he doesn't have alot of friends in the city. I thought maybe you shouldn't do that while in a relationship, but she thought otherwise and I just had to accept that our opinions differed and I was mostly fine with it. I really don't have any right to control her from seeing her longtime friend, but also thought it might have been that she wanted some attention or just talk to her friend.
Time went on and things were mostly really good between us, I still had some issues with trusting her because I always thought the time could come when she turned to this cold, distant version of herself. So I had some insecurities and needed her to ensure me from time to time that she's not about to flip again and that she's still into me and doesn't have interest in other guys. I noticed my behaviour started to annoy her and that my constant anxiety pushed her to distance herself from regular emotional talk. She kept snaping guys, mostly her co-worker several times a day, also while we were hanging out, they had a long snap streak and I asked about it after I reacted disturbed/troubled with my gf. She once again ensured me it's only a co-worker and they only talk about silly stuff with each other. I asked why they talked so frequently and about my worries and fears of stuff like this evolving into potential emotional cheating and maybe later on even physical cheating. That I myself would not text a girl buddy this much out of respect to my partner. She had a different opinion than me, but eventually agreed that you should not do some stuff with the opposite sex out of respect for your partner, but she thinks it would be totally fine going out alone just the two of them and having drinks as long as it's a friend. I didn't really agree it's cool but that it's probably no problem in some cases with very specific friends where there's no romance involved, but we agreed to disagree.
Fast forward to some weeks later when we had a conflict over the phone. I once again didn't really feel she was comitted since she didn't want to spend the whole upcoming weekend with me despite we haven't seen each other for two-three weeks. I just wanted her to want to spend all days of the weekend with me but she wanted to rest by herself one of the days, I reacted badly to this and regret I questioned it at all and didn't respect her need for some alone time. She also told me out of the blue she wanted to move to another city to which I reacted shocked and responded "but what about us and our plans of me moving to your current place?". She then responded that it was just a temporary thought that occurred to her and it wasn't that serious. I told her I was disappointed by this and that I hoped she would have considered my feelings in it all, it was a big step for me just moving to her current place further on. She said "I thought we had a really stable relationship but after this I'm not so sure anymore.."
After this she successively became colder and more distant in her texts. My anxiety increased, I apologized to her for my behaviour and wanted to work things out but she just said "we'll talk about it when we meet, not now". When the weekend came she was all cold towards me and in the evening told me she had to break up with me, she had talked to her colleagues and they all said I tried to control her and was an insecure guy. They said she needs to leave me and if I say I would do better she would just be controlled by me again, so she could never return to me for her own health-safety. Before this they really liked me and said I was such a sweet and nice guy and I've also met most of them too. I was shocked. I'm thinking to myself "that's not me, I'm actually a genuine guy with good moral and traits". Now basically everything I'd say could be considered as manipulative behaviour. She also told me she went to eat lunch alone with her co-worker she had snaped with the day after our fight but was afraid to tell me because of jealousy. Since I was so invested (talking about kids, house etc which is my big dream to do with someone I love) in the relationship and so in love I just couldn't let her go and I did everything I could to convince her to stay with me. She agreed to giving me "another chance" since I had given her another chance before but it really didn't feel like it. She was cold towards me but also gave me glimpses of hope during a whole month and this totally drained me. It was hot n cold and mixed signals all over the place and she also did some mean stuff like sexually teasing me and then saying "nope, no sex for you". I was supposed to go on a trip with her and her family but she said it got cancelled, then they went to another place anyways without inviting me. After this she came to my place, returned my stuff and actually had a long talk about our relationship and how she didn't want to keep working on it. She listened to me for the first time after basically stonewalling me for a month and I was of course very sad since this was the end for us and I tried everything to convince her to stay with me but ultimately was left alone.
After all this I've been depressed and even suicidal most of the days. I'm going to therapy and trying anti-depressants. I do have a history of depression, but it's never been this bad. Trying to take care of myself, seeing friends and family, working out even though it's hard. I tried reaching out to her after NC for 6 weeks but she said she has moved on and that I should too. My self-worth is at the bottom now, way worse than before the relationship. I'm also worried I won't find anyone I love again in my small city to maybe start a family with some day. I feel like a failure and don't have really any other big life goals, it's all dark right now. I'm aware of the codependency and unsecure anxious attachment i developed towards her while she was being avoidant. I've really done reflection and analyzed it all but I just want to hear your opinions about the situation and maybe some support.

How do you go about dating if your over 21+ but you rely on parents for transportation
Hi. I am an individual with multiple disabilities/health conditions (anxiety adhd and possible autism) and I’m 25. I was wondering how you go about dating if you rely on your parents for transportation. Unfortunately I have a condition that causes limited depth perception so I am not sure driving is the best option for me and I’m also afraid to learn even though my doctors say it wouldn’t hurt to learn. I also have t1 diabetes. Unfortunately I live in a rural area with limited transportation options too. Given that I am My mother’s only child she is very overprotective of me (and the few friends I have always comment this). However, she does talk about me moving out but I’m almost certain she wouldn’t let that happen because she’s over protective even though we fight all the time. I should also clarify that I love my mother and she can be my friend but she’s also very overprotective.
Case in point: I needed to get somewhere the other night and neither my parents (my father seems to think my mom is the only one who needs to drive me around sometimes) could take me, and I put it out on fb (just my friends list) that I needed a ride but my mom saw it and said I’m not letting you get in car with someone I don’t know. I mean I wouldn’t have gotten a ride from a murderer…but she yelled at me and made me take it down. Thankfully I did get a text from a family member that they could take me where I needed to go. But that incident made me think what if I met a guy on a dating site and we clicked but I needed a ride to get there and my mom said no. I mean dating is part of how I would move out, but I’m not sure my mother understands that online dating is how the majority of people meet these days. I don’t feel like my mom is abusing me or necessarily being mean but she’s just way over protective. I do plan to bring this up with my therapist as well. Does anyone have any ideas?

My SO (31M) has been through it for most of our relationship. He’s had almost all physical jobs in his life — bar backing and hauling kegs of beer upstairs, goodwill handling furniture & etc, to the grocery store we work at where we met where we do daily breakdowns of dozens of pallets with boxes up to 50lb and other tasks that cannot be truly done in an ergonomic way.
His daily low back pain is from a 7-9/10. He’s got a bulging lumbar disc and mild arthritis. We tried an epidural a few weeks back that did nothing.
We’re trying physical therapy and he’s considering a new job but he’s having numbness from what is also probably a pinched nerve in his neck.
I feel so utterly distraught sometimes. I’m not a doctor and every step of trying to get this addressed has been hell with doctors who don’t believe him because he’s too young and just — we just got an $11,000 bill for the epidural a $2,500 bill for the anesthesia despite insurance. (We’re waiting on that. Hoping it was just submitted incorrectly.)
Sometimes I feel like I can’t breathe. I feel so badly he can’t live the life he wants. I wish I could do more than rub his feet on a rough day. It’s hard not to cry right now even writing this.
People who love people in chronic pain — How do you manage seeing the people you love so much in so much pain with no break in it?
People in chronic pain, what helps you the most from your loved ones? What is aggravating?
I don’t want to be weepy all over him. He tells me sometimes that he’s sorry that he shared with me because it visibly upsets me to know how much he’s suffering. I’m not trying to add to the weight or feel like a burden.
I just — wish there was something I could do so so SO much to make it better.

OOC: Co-Written with u/VictoriousBaffon :)
When Maxwell took the job to refuel the car, he figured he would be the one doing the oil change. Quick business, 20 minutes in and out. Wrenches, rags, the whole shabang. Easy job, easy brownie points for the empty Techne cabin. Let’s clear the three elephants in the room, though.
Firstly. Why is the job labeled as refueling the car when it actually needs an oil change? That’s not a refueling! That’s an oil change!
Secondly! Why did he need to find a mechanic? Maxwell could do it! It’s easy! You just put the car on a jack, crawl under it, remove the oil pan screw, wait for it to drain, screw it back in, remove the filter, replace it with the new one, and then add oil at the top! Whatever. One day, he might just do something like that here.
Thirdly…
“Theo, why did you sign up for this?” Maxwell questioned his girlfriend as she approached, a grin plastered on her face.
“Oh, come on, Max. It says it right there! One of you probably needs to know how to drive! I can drive, and, besides, if you went alone, someone might try to steal you from me, and I can’t have that.” She said simply, patting Maxwell’s cheek affectionately.
“Theo, nobody would try to steal me from you. Besides, it’s not like the mechanic is far. Maybe… 12 miles? That’s, what…” He scratched his head, his fingers moving in a way as if they were typing on an invisible keyboard, “20 minutes? Half an hour? If that.” He said simply before something clicked in his brain. “Hey! I can drive too!”
“Mario Kart doesn’t count. Not even that old one from some 30 years ago where you actually steer with the remote.”
“Mario Kart Wii is probably more realistic than what you’ve done. Besides, when have you driven?”
Theodora shrugged nonchalantly as she explained, “Nikita showed me how. I’ve driven around in an empty parking lot once or twice, so I figure I’m more qualified.”
Maxwell sighed, shaking his head. “I really feel like we should get someone who has an actual license on hand. Besides, Theo, this is an entirely different beast! New York traffic is infamous for being impossible to navigate without wanting to burn your horn out with how much you use it!”
“Max, c’mon. We’ve got seatbelts for a reason. ‘Sides, who’s gonna know?”
“Me! You! Hell, I wouldn’t be shocked if Mr. D, Chiron, or Lady A found out! No, I will not let you drive!” Maxwell stomped his foot on the ground as he huffed, coming off as more adorable than actually scary or intimidating. Of course, unphased as always, Theodora just laughed as she kissed her boyfriend.
“You’re the worst…”
“I love you too, Max.”
Maxwell stood beside the van, looking down at the ground as he nudged Theo, nodding towards an approaching NPC daughter of Hypnos. Theodora glanced at her boyfriend exasperatedly, making the son of Techne just shake his head as the daughter of the god of sleep got into the driver’s seat.
Maxwell got into the back seats of the van, leaving shotgun open if Theo wanted it. She did not. Instead, she decided to get back at her boyfriend for daring to doubt her ability to drive, license be damned. That’s why she got in the backseat with Maxwell, deciding to get into his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck, taking great satisfaction in the flushing of his face.
The daughter of Nike couldn’t help but laugh slightly at how easily the boy flushed, teasing him. “Something wrong, Max?” She asked nonchalantly as she fiddled and toyed with the drawstrings on Maxwell’s hoodie.
“Yes? One. We’re about to leave, and you’re on my lap. That’s… Not safe. Two. We’re not exactly alone, Theo. Three. This is my seat!” Maxwell listed off his reasons for wanting Theo to get off of his lap, unable to meet her eyes as he did so.
“Buzzkill.” Theo rolled her eyes as she slid off of Maxwell’s lap, plopping down right next to him afterwards. She got adjusted in her seat, wrapping an arm around Maxwell’s shoulder, pulling him close to her as the three demigods rode off towards the mechanic.
The mechanic was no further than half an hour out from camp, and the car ride was… Uneventful, to say the least. Mostly the occasional murmur from the young couple in the back, mostly about things such as Sam– Theo’s cousin, the son of Hecate– and his relationship with the other Sam, or about how Theo could go to the Techne cabin at any time due to it being mostly empty now.
Thankfully, right as Theodora was about to fall asleep from boredom, the car came to a halt as the daughter of sleep, who had driven them here with a valid driver’s license, of course, gave the keys to the mortal mechanic, telling him they needed an oil change. This was, of course, the cue for Maxwell, Theo, and their chauffeur to get out of the van, Maxwell stretching out as he did so.
Now, it was pleasantly warm outside today, and, as such, Maxwell decided to take his hoodie off, revealing a pair of overalls underneath. By the look of things, he really had his little heart set on changing the oil himself. Now, of course, the instant he took his hoodie off, Theo paused to check her boyfriend out just a bit think about something. For all of a second. The daughter of victory was quick to the draw thanks to her superior speed. Maxwell’s own creation, the flight-capable Omnichao, could only fly at 15 miles to the hour. Theodora, on the other hand, at her maximum potential, could blast past the automaton at a mindboggling 23 miles an hour. With this speed, dexterity, and agility, Theo could do a lot of things.
This includes stealing the seafoam green hoodie from Maxwell’s hands.
Maxwell’s eyes went wide as the hoodie was ripped from his hands. Of course, he kept a loose grip on it, but he didn’t expect it to just be ripped out like that. “Theo!” Maxwell said sharply, turning around, pouting as he saw her putting his hoodie on. There was a decent size difference between Maxwell’s clothes and Theo’s, and it showed. Maxie’s hoodie was just a little bit large on Theodora, and it was clear she was loving this. The grin on her face said it all as she spoke, “What? You clearly don’t want it on right now. That’s why you took it off, right? For me?”
“That’s–”
“That’s not–”
“I didn’t–”
“I knew it. Oh, I must be the luckiest girl alive.” Theo stuck her tongue out as Maxwell attempted to plead his case. “‘Sides, it smells like you, and I like having things which remind me of you.” Seeing Maxwell’s eyes roll, Theo clicked her tongue before she approached Maxwell, wrapping her arms around his neck as she kissed his nose. “I’ll let you have one of mine in exchange. Deal?”
“...Deal.” Maxwell sighed, folding his arms across his chest as he subconsciously used his thermal grasp power to steal some bodily heat from the blonde.
Mortal mechanics work fast. Provided they’re competent, that is. This particular mortal, who semeed no more than 40, seemed competent, though, as if making sure, Maxwell subtly watched from behind. The last thing he needed was for the three of them to be on their way back, only for the car to try to use gunk shot, and blast oil all over the freeway like they were laying the course for a Mario Kart track.
Thankfully, Maxwell couldn’t find any faults within the mechanic’s working. The man charged the trio of demigods a large fee of 70 USD, which made Maxwell cringe, taking a mental note to just ask if he could do it himself next time. He could’ve done it for a fraction of that price. 30 USD, if that. But, whatever. Not his problem. It would normally have been the problem of Theo’s moms, except for two issues. One. It’s not even a problem– they’re millionaires. 70 dollars is like pricking someone on the finger for one measly droplet of blood. They’d survive. Two. It seemed as though the daughter of Hypnos had them covered. Well, that was nice of her. The three campers all climbed back into the van after they paid for the mechanic’s service, riding back off to camp. Discussions between Maxwell and Theo mostly consisted of topics such as, ”When are we going to spar?”, ”My sleep schedule is fine.”, and, ”Since when did you appear in the news?” Normal demigod business. Another half of an hour passed, and the three demigods rolled up, the van still notably in one piece. Maxwell and Theo talked about it before they decided that they probably(?) didn’t have to go to the big house to make an announcement. It’s not like they fought monsters, much to the disappointment of Theodora.
Instead, Maxwell allowed himself to be dragged off to cabin 17 for the hoodie he was promised from Theo.

My (25F) grandmother (72) has been diagnosed with cancer and has been given a few months to live. I would like to see her but there's drama surrounding it.
Some context: My grandma and I have hardly spoken over the past 5 years, our only contact being over text message with the odd happy birthday, Merry Christmas. I've seen her once in person. I have 2 children, one who she hasn't met but she sent a gift for the birth (which I thanked her for). We had a great relationship growing up other than she was always a borderline alcoholic and was very unfiltered and could get nasty when drunk.
Everything changed when she ruined my wedding day. She got so drunk and insulted my husband and a bunch of other things. It was completely unprovoked and she just got her liquid courage to be an AH, on my wedding day of all days. We didn't speak for a few weeks following and when we finally did, after pleading family members told me to reach out, we had a phone conversation where she half arsed apologised to me but refused to apologise to my husband.
Fast forward, her being terminal has made me have a long think, I wanted to reach out and see if she was happy to see me and my kids (not husband) as I think it'll give me some peace and I think she would really be happy. I don't want to use this to fully reconcile (I don't think), I purely just want to see her for the probable last time and have her meet her new grandchild. I wanted to kind of put it in her court, not just appear out of nowhere as I wanted to make sure it was something she'd want to. If she didn't, that was fine with me.
I mentioned this to my parents and I got the stupid comment from my mum of 'Do you think you'll be put into her Will?'. I was shocked hearing this, even though I think it was a bit of a joking comment. I'm aware my grandmother has hardly anything and I couldn't care less and made that clear to my mum. If I was bothered, I wouldn't have cut to next to no contact with her as I know she'd be as she always was, spending money she doesn't really have on me as that's her love language so to speak. My dad then perked up and told me that my Auntie had took my dad's ear off over the phone earlier because he told her that he told me she was diagnosed. My relationship with my Aunt isn't great, we aren't close (she lives hours away and I saw her like maybe once a year when I was growing up if that) but she still reaches out occasionally, comments on my Facebook and so on. She told my dad that I don't have the right to know and that she hopes that I don't think I can worm my way into my grandmother's life now she's dying.
I'm just conflicted as it truly isn't my intention to just want to be in her life again for some money or for anything other than thinking seeing her will bring us both a little peace during the end of her life.
So, WIBTA for reaching out to see her?

How do you go about dating if your over 21+ but you rely on parents for transportation
Hi. I am an individual with multiple disabilities/health conditions (anxiety adhd and possible autism) and I’m 25. I was wondering how you go about dating if you rely on your parents for transportation. Unfortunately I have a condition that causes limited depth perception so I am not sure driving is the best option for me and I’m also afraid to learn even though my doctors say it wouldn’t hurt to learn. I also have t1 diabetes. Unfortunately I live in a rural area with limited transportation options too. Given that I am My mother’s only child she is very overprotective of me (and the few friends I have always comment this). However, she does talk about me moving out but I’m almost certain she wouldn’t let that happen because she’s over protective even though we fight all the time. I should also clarify that I love my mother and she can be my friend but she’s also very overprotective.
Case in point: I needed to get somewhere the other night and neither my parents (my father seems to think my mom is the only one who needs to drive me around sometimes) could take me, and I put it out on fb (just my friends list) that I needed a ride but my mom saw it and said I’m not letting you get in car with someone I don’t know. I mean I wouldn’t have gotten a ride from a murderer…but she yelled at me and made me take it down. Thankfully I did get a text from a family member that they could take me where I needed to go. But that incident made me think what if I met a guy on a dating site and we clicked but I needed a ride to get there and my mom said no. I mean dating is part of how I would move out, but I’m not sure my mother understands that online dating is how the majority of people meet these days. I don’t feel like my mom is abusing me or necessarily being mean but she’s just way over protective. I do plan to bring this up with my therapist as well. Does anyone have any ideas?