Freaky dares for truth or dare for guys

This is one my favorite joke phrases when someone says they got told off for something small or absurd. "I was a minute late and my ex screamed at me." "You were a minute late? How dare you!"
Is there a similar expression of sarcasm that would work there instead? Or is it the same? (I don't know the word for 'dare' in this situation, either, though).
Tack så mycket!

(posted this in a different subreddit earlier)
The year is 2024, and things are not looking good for the Democrats.
Joe Biden is constantly plagued by infighting within his ranks. The Democratic Party, in addition to being hamstrung by institutions that are by nature biased towards conservatives, like the innate design of the Senate, and the conservative makeup of the Supreme Court, are constantly struggling with infighting by the purist far-left, and the impotent center. On one side, they are dealing with an increasingly irrational “far-left” that refuses to the see the bigger picture of defeating Trump, as well as dealing with a middling center that frequently resorts to “both-sideism” and shrugs their shoulders instead of calling out the clear threat of Republican rule. On top of that, the Democrats have been OBSESSED with decorum, following the rules, ALWAYS compromising, and holding their members to higher standards as Republicans refuse to do so. Do you see the Republicans compromising? Following norms? Nope. The Republican apparatus, from Mitch McConnell to the fringes of the Freedom Caucus, are constantly moving in lockstep, pushing their right-wing vision through the finish line. Some, like political scientist David Faris, argue that Democrats must realize that "It's Time to Fight Dirty", after years of pussyfooting around, finally, at long last? It's as the old saying goes, “Democrats fall in love, Republicans fall in line”. It’s a situation worthy of a Greek Tragedy….
….Or is it?
Because if you speak to the average Republican voter, they will absolutely not agree with what I wrote above. Rather, it is the Democrats who are enacting win after win, and getting their left-wing agenda through their finish line while the middling Republicans trip over their shoelaces. Left-wing activists, like Antonio Gramsci, have conducted a Long March Through The Institutions, like a nation proudly marching through the battlefield and conquering their enemies. The liberals control everything.The culture. The education system. The legal system. The youth. Republicans have lost the Culture War, a war that men like Chris Rufo argue that the Right barely even attempted to fight as the Radical Left had their eyes on the ball, onwards through the battlefield. Marching on. The Left has always possessed a machiavellian spirit, and an ironclad grip on every avenue that we as Americans hold dear. Men like Jon Askonas, looking at the rubble of conservatism, ponder "Why Conservatism Failed". That’s how much the Left has won! The ideology of Conservatism itself is DEAD! Meanwhile, the conservative movement, or shall I say, Conservatism Inc., is obsessed with maintaining tired platitudes about “small government” and “low taxes” as Democrats are focused on controlling every inch of the American body. Conservatives aren’t winning, they are impotently flailing. Pathetic.
Does that really make sense? Are both the political right and the political left united in lockstep, but weak and plagued with endless infighting? Can both sides be obsessed with playing the rules and compromising, but also be steadfastly seizing control of all major institutions?
A lot of the above is me rambling, but I believe this ties back to what Gallup has reported recently, as “most Americans (71%) say that, on the issues that matter to them, their side in politics has been losing more often than winning. Just a quarter say their side has been winning more often than losing.” The article also mentions that this varies based on which party is in power, and is right now "eight-in-ten Republicans and Republican-leaning independents (83%)" as well as "six-in-ten Democrats and Democratic leaners (62%)". But this a sentiment I have noticed the past several years. Dare I say, “Both sides”, having identical complaints about their political allies.
Republican voters complain that their side is obsessed with following norms, espousing platitudes, and playing by the Democrats' rules, while the Democrats are motivated and pressing forward with their left-wing agenda.
Democratic voters complain that their side is obsessed with following norms, espousing platitudes, and playing by the Republicans’ rules, while the Republicans are motivated and pressing forward with their right-wing agenda.
Our side is obsessed with compromise. Their side never compromises.
Our side is obsessed with preserving “muh norms”. Their side couldn’t give a shit about norms.
Our side is constantly held to a higher standard. Their side is constantly treated with kid gloves.
Our side is fighting with a knife. Their side is fighting with a gun.
Our side always holds ourselves accountable. Their side never holds themselves accountable.
Now, I am someone who leans more on the political left (especially the economic left), but this is a sentiment I see expressed by a lot of Republican and Democratic voters, who both feel like they are the unfairly maligned underdog.
The staticy of our current federalist, two party, FPTP system creates a significant amount of deadlock, especially as the two parties realign on class, geographic, and educational lines. Landslide elections are becoming less and less common. Neither Republicans nor Democrats seem to have the ability to break through landslide sweeps and reshape the country with a governing mandate, instead dealing with gridlock and incrementalism that is inherent to the American experiment.
I believe this situation leads to both groups of voters turning back to a comforting narrative of how their side is effectively persecuted by various forces. How their side is always held to a higher standard compared to the opposition. How they have been plagued historically by infighting and a fetish for norms and holding your pinky up.
Now, I’m not giving my opinions on which side is correct. Democrats are at a disadvantage in the Senate (I think that is partially due to Democrats bleeding away rural votes over decades). Republicans are at a disadvantage in mainstream culture (I think that is due to an incompatibility with social conservatism and capitalism, but that’s another discussion for another day).
I am simply stating that I have observed this exact same sentiment among both Republican and Democratic voters/pundits. Whether it’s left-leaning internet forums, or conservative talk radio, I see and hear the exact same lines, but flip a few words. How our side is impotent, infighting, and constantly snatching defeat from the jaws of victory, unlike our enemies. Republicans and Democrats, faced with years or decades of painful incrementalism, at best, resort back to the same narrative. Our side is weak and divided, their side is strong and united.

Tips on improving Your mood in the end If You don’t feel to read all the other bs. Be free to scroll down and read the tips 1-4
So I used to be a full on extrovert I liked going to places and travel and be with other people.
Now I just dont care tbh. I have depression but I refuse to take medicine to it and I have mangaed to cope pretty well with natural things see the tips in the end.
Anyway My family was asking if we should Go to a lovely vacation to Italy - Me i’d rather be at home in my room or something? We bought a new summer house like 2 years ago and I have never been there beacause everytime they ask Me to come with them there I dont care to go. Why? I don’t even fully know myself…
Some days are better but not everyday… I can be mad or just empty on off. I’d like to cry but I just fully can’t… I have been struggling more or less with Depression from around 2017 I am not harmful or suicidal to myself in any way anymore. I love life but I just don’t understand the point off it.
I also had problems with My appetite maybe 4months ago and ate like 2 times a day on the worst days and even lost some weight .
Now I have managed to hold a normal eating rhythm and I eat about 4 - 5 times thru the day and even healthy gained some weight Im in a fully normal weight. The only problem is that I eat like only alone either way In my living room or my room. I have not dared to go out eating to a restaurant with friends… Why? Well I mean imagine how embarrassing it is if I’d go and eat to a restaurant and when the food comes My appetite would be gone …
I’m a “ If I can’t do it myself. I can’t do it at all” type off guy… But now I want to get back to fucking normal so tomorrow I took the first step and Im going to the psychiatrict doctor .
I have tried to cope wit my mental health alone for Years so here are Tips on improving You mood that helps Me . I mean it doesn’t mean that it will work for You but You can try…

1. Nature Walks in forest actually is scientifically proven to lower stress levels and help to cope with depression.
   
2. Ice bathing Feels like shit to do but for me My focus disappears from my negative thoughts and You have to focus to breathe normally which can also be calming.
   
3. Sauna Many proven health benefits it also lowers your stress levels.
   
4. Distractions whatever activity You like to do to get You to focus on something else…
   

• I know that we are both struggling but the biggest mistake we can do is to give up . We probably would like to try something new but all we see is every negative thing 10 miles down the street… I will tell You that fear has destroyed more people than failure ever will. Go ahead and try .

Good luck on getting better👋🏻❤️

If you're curious about my thoughts on previous Yakuza games, here are my much shorter (except for 4, thats pretty long too) reviews for Kiwami 1, Kiwami 2, Yakuza 3 (Remastered), and Yakuza 4 (Remastered).
All of my reviews are made pretty quickly after I finish the game, this was written right after I finished but I haven't posted it till a month later because its so long I thought no one would ever read this but whatever I gotta get my truth out there.
Per usual I played the remaster of Yakuza 5. I'm not sure of any outstanding changes or things of note like with 3 or 4, but if something I say is exclusive to the remaster please let me know! I may sound overly praising or overly critical of this game, who knows but please be kind when you tell me i'm an idiot for feeling the way I do! Lastly and most importantly please please please don't spoil future games in the comments! Also warning I'm way too active in the comments section.
Because I am an utter psycho and decided to write a fuckin bibles worth of yakuza 5 ramblings, Part 1 is just reviewing the plot and Part 2 goes over everything else. I split this up last second so there's likely some spots where I say something like "we'll expand on this later" then I never bring it up again, that's because it's probably in part 2. If you want my thoughts on things like the substories, side stories, gameplay, and settings you can read Part 2 here: https://www.reddit.com/yakuzagames/comments/1cvrybw/yakuza_5_a_mega_big_ole_reviewsummary_for_a_big/
The Plot:
Like with Y4, I will discuss my thoughts on each section of the game rather than in one long chunk just because I find it more fun. I'm not even gonna try to not summarize this time because this game is so big it needs broken down.
Part 1: Kiryu
You might often find me compare Y5 to Y4 a lot in this review because they're honestly quite similar games and feel like a package. When I started playing 4 I was worried I wouldn't like playing as primarily strangers for a majority of the game, but one thing they did absolutely right was making Kiryu the final protagonist you play as in that game. So going into 5 I was very apprehensive about starting off with Kiryu, I worried they showed their hand too soon and that it would be difficult to stay invested the whole time.
With this feeling going into the game, I was immediately somewhat losing it over Kiryu being an incognito taxi driver with the worst disguise of all time (some sunglasses and a face mask, don't worry he's literally the only one in the game that seems to think it's a good disguise). Right off the bat, this game feels...sad. Kiryu watching Haruka giving an interview on the TV and storming out rather then defend her to some losers who don't get what ART is, was SAD. This part of the game felt so mundane for awhile, but not in a bad way! You wakeup as Kiryu, walk to work, drive your taxi, and go home late at night (usually) alone. The whole time my eyes were drawn to a facedown picture frame and wondering what it could be, but I certainly had a guess. Kiryu is going through a hard, isolating, and depressing time and you can feel that so well from the game and how they have you play as him. Anyways there's also a random gal named Mayumi that will not leave Kiryu alone despite him asking her to. All you're doing by the end of chapter one is going "Huhhhhhhh?" Anyways Kiryu is approached by two dudes named Morinaga and Aizawa in chapter 2, telling him Daigo was???? Kidnapped?? GASP.. Admittidly I wasn't too fond of this duo at first. One thing that was consistent through my playthrough is that I was completely incapable of predicting anything correctly, and it had felt like these two were gonna be my pals for the rest of the game and I just wasn't clicking with them. Not to mention this weird semi-one sided-romance going on with Mayumi.
In chapter 3, we begin with the most heartbreaking thing that could ever happen to me, Yakuza 3 superfan. Kiryu has been pushed out of running the orphanage by a lady named Miss Park. It's all making sense now. He does it so the orphanage can have money and so Haruka can follow her dreams. DOESNT MAKE IT EASIER TO DEAL WITH FOR ME :( . Then we meet Watase, first thoughts? I was like "god I hope this guy isn't the main villain he's kinda lame" Soon after we meet Aoyama and I thought literally the same thing. Clearly by this point in the game I didn't have the highest hopes. I was mostly sad and not liking most of the new characters. But then... things take a turn.
Mayumi was actually a spy! thank god honestly. Kiryu meets Aoyama again but then Morinaga shows up and fuckin kills Aoyama and says he buried Aizawa alive HOLY SHIT? and then soon after I'm told Majima is fucking dead. Figured he wasn't actually dead cuz I've seen pictures of him from later games but holy shit I somehow cried just at the THOUGHT of him being dead. Also at some point here we met a detective who is an important player in this story but at this point not too integral. Also before Kiryu leaves he picks up the picture frame and its the orphanage ;-;
Kiryu final thoughts: This part of the game was fantastic. I'm so glad they started with Kiryu in this case despite my initial unsureness with it. Chapter 4 especially is when everything really falls into place and starts going 100 miles an hour but I also love the slowness of the previous 3 chapters. I do wish we got more Morinaga as this is unfortunately the last we hear of him despite this being a wonderful set up to a really interesting villain. Mayumi was a pretty shit character per seemingly always with any full grown woman in Yakuza games. While I think it's cool she was secretly a spy she was clearly an afterthought as we never hear about her again so that's cool. Basically a mixed bag of new characters overall.
Part 2: Saejima
I jokingly said to myself "Wouldn't it be funny if I had to spend half of this section breaking out of prison again. Thank god that's not the case." and continued hanging out with Majima until I was arrested for two more years of serving my sentence and OH NO IM BACK IN THE BUILDING.
Yeah I was VERY unsure about breaking out of prison again being a good call. Thankfully, and sorry to Y4, this is a much better prison sequence. Another thing I was really unsure about was BALD SAEJIMA! But actually... it kinda slays harder? In Y4 he looks like that guy from the game The Hatred (an insult) maybe it wouldn't be so bad if bro washed or brushed it but he never did and so instead bald was a slay. Anyways We're dropped in at nearly the end of Saejima's serving period with his group of friends/cellmates, newest one being some dude named Baba. We are relentlessly tortured by the scariest man I've ever seen, Viktor Zsasz-I MEAN! Kugihara. Who's honestly scarier looking then Zsasz somehow. But it is ON because Viktor Zsasz framed my bestie Baba and I will not let that slide so I beat the fuck out of him and it's revealed Zsasz was instructed to be a dick to me. By who??????????????????? Then it's double revealed to me that Majima is dead and I'm sad all over again :(
Turns out our warden is actually really chill and nice and somewhat tries to help us survive. What a breath of fresh air after Satan (Saito) from Y4. This guy is so cool infact we are encouraged to break out by him. So Baba and I do in the dead of the night and tell me why I cried over leaving my two other cellmates ;_; they were such bros. Zsasz hinders my escape and we fight, but my absolute PAL Himura fuckin shoots him it was an amazing turn of events and I cheered so loud and was devastated to leave him behind but anyways-
FUCK YEA SNOW MOBILES (they were kinda jank to control honestly but its the thought that counts). I am so glad I didn't know I was going to be fighting a bear going into this because that was easily the most camp thing ever and so hilarious. Then some old guy saves me (and later Baba) and we chill in the mountains for a little while. The mountain has a whole crazy detailed side story of it's own that I'll explain in more detail later but basically it was cool.
So then a ton of important stuff happens in Tsukimino, most notably we hang out with Baba in a bar which is great because I love Baba and him and I are super tight and he's easily the only person I could ever trust at this point without potential for betrayal! :)
Anyways me and Baba fuckin kidnap this guy because his chair is by a sewer manhole? He's gone in a flash so all I can imagine is dragging him down the hole by his ankle or something. Then we talk for awhile, Majima is mentioned woohoo, THEN HE'S sniped! The way I gasped. Longstory short :( Baba is the one who sniped him and not only that he kind of set everything up and wasn't my best pal all along :( Why Baba Why? Then Baba basically confesses his love for Saejima and can't go through with killing him, AAAAAAND Im back on the Baba train. That detective I mentioned from earlier arrests Saejima but not to throw him back in jail, to assemble the Yakuza avengers.
Final Saejima thoughts: This was shockingly fantastic. I was probably least impressed with Saejima's section in Y4, so it was shocking to have basically the same structure and general narrative beats but done well. It wasn't perfect, I didn't love it as much as Kiryu's section as I'm partial to a slow burn, but it was fun I have no real complaints, except MAYBE more then one chapter in Tsukimino would be a better choice.
Part 3 (first half): Haruka
I did not know I was going to get the HONOR of playing Haruka going into this game. We start off very strong, dancing to the greatest song of all time "So Much More." I mean we really get the full idol experience here with mean ass teachers and shady management. I didn't expect to get an Idol simulator in my Yakuza game but it might be the best thing ever. I decided right off the bat to put everything I had into this section of the game so immediately I did literally everything I could. Most of this chapter feels like a bit of a reflection of Kiryu's were working and going back home alone, it's all as monotonous and isolating as can be (except you're a predebut idol) and I love this. We quickly meet a girl who will serve as my bestie named Akari and yes I indeed would die for her thank you. Meeting Akari introduces us to this sections version of combat, DANCE BATTLES! I know some people might be disappointed you don't get to punch people as Haruka, and I get that, but this feels like a more genuine gameplay style for her character. It's hard to imagine Haruka fighting thugs in the street due to her personality (not that i'd be against it, especially after that weird virtual reality game where I get to wack dudes with a wand) plus I found this gameplay style so refreshing. I was never groaning or sighing because I had to dance against someone. I think it helps that I wasn't forced to do it 15 times in a row walking down the street, but I had the option to most of the time unless it was part of a quest. Maybe that's how all the gameplay should be? I don't mind being approached by thugs sometimes but it always feels like it happens too often in these games and with getting the option to while getting to walk around carefree otherwise in Haruka's section was just SO NICE.
Anyways, We get the whole set up here, we are participating in a competition show that will single handedly set the course for our debut. We're competing against this band called T-set. I hate them so much. They're so mean :(. At some point we see Miss Park absolutely SLAY and tell off Haruka's dance teacher and she doesn't take his shit at all. At this point I was like "Uh ohhhh I don't wanna like her but...she kinda rocks" my decent into stanning Miss Park only continues from there. We have to go convince some guy named Christina (interesting name to take but also a slay, much respect to Mr. Christina and his fedora) to be our new dance instructor. This causes drama with me and Akari which devastated me because I love Akari but we made up like immediately so it's chill.
Then at one point, I forgot the context, Haruka is shopping for a gift for Miss Park when stupid T-set shows up and STEPS ON THE BROACH I BOUGHT FOR HER. I was back and forth on them until now, now they may burn in hell. Especially after they made Haruka get on her knees and beg for forgiveness like ???? what gives ??? Park shows up and SLAYS and gets rid of them. Park then wears the broach :(((((((((
Then one of my favorite parts happen in chapter 2, Haruka and Miss Park go hit the town and just bond together. It's so stinking cute I wanted to cry. This whole time I was trying to not get emotionally attached to Park because it really felt like she was gonna end up betraying us. But the night continued and we get some mother daughter vibes going, even so far as holding hands????? Also Im somewhat glad I didn't get to wear the outfit I bought at the store with Park because I was going for a Cheetah girls inspired look then realized far too late how tacky that might come off, not everyone is Raven Symone ya know?
Anyways at this point I'm like wow this is the cutest game ever, nothing can ever go wrong, Park MIGHT betray me but I don't even care. She gives us a cool pen and a tragic anime backstory with an abusive ex husband and everything and we call it a night Well the next fuckin day my world crumbles because PARK IS DEAD! She "committed suicide" as if!
Part 3 (second half): Akiyama
I can't tell you how devastated I was to realize I'd only get to play as Akiyama for half of a section of the game. However, I was also thrilled to see him at all. Apparently he's opening a Satenbori office and also he is the one who financed Park's dream to debut Haruka so that's how he has a hand in all this. There is tragically very little Hana, she calls you twice and both times were fantastic but I wish I had more :(. Anyways Akiyama has heard about Park's death and goes to the office and meets Haruka. I didn't think they'd even really know each other and assumed we'd have an interesting reveal that they both know Kiryu later but nah they know each other. It honestly probably works better this way because we don't have time for such trivial things! Akiyama is a fuckin detective now. I don't know why he has been tasked to do this but he does it so well I don't even mind. He quickly figures out Park didn't actually kill herself and they simply need evidence to prove this. I'm unsure when this happens but at some point while talking about the mystery SOMEONE FALLS OFF THE ROOF! It was Horie :( who I haven't mentioned yet but he's my manager and a real pal. Thankfully he lived but we found out that the former dance teacher pushed him off. I think he also killed Park or Kanai did, who knows, either way someone did and they suck for it.
Chapter 4 has a lot going on, but basically the president of Osaka talent is sus and he's also the secret chairman of Ousaka Enterprises, which is a different thing... but sounds similar. Ousaka is basically a higher up family in the Omi alliance, so he's part of the bad yakuza!!! Haruka keeps doing the competition and T-set keeps sucking. She wins the princess league by a landslide. I don't even see the point in a third round if she won both of the other rounds? Is the third round just worth more points? Either way Haruka destroyed them and they suck. Her poor vocal instructor is working as her manager now. At some point we find out Parks ex husband was none other then Majima! Which is quite the revelation. Japan is such a small world, everyone seems to know each other. This does mean that Majima at least hit Park (I think after her abortion) and I think he's like 10 years older then her yet they were already married when she debuted at eighteen... Is it time for me to confront the possibility that my favorite crazed murderer might not be the most upstanding citizen?
It ends with Haruka being kidnapped, (nothing out of character there), and Akiyama saving her. He and Haruka make their way to Japan for the big ole concert Park had been planning. Wow this story is really picking up! I hope nothing grinds it to a sudden stop!
Part 3 final thoughts: God this was amazing, every step of it. My only complaint is I wanted more, more Akiyama and MORE dancing but I might be the only one who wanted 40 more hours of dancing. Detective Akiyama and Haruka duo was not the team I knew I needed but Im glad it happened. I found all of the music and gameplay here SO fun and I loved the plot too. I really liked Parks character. I wouldn't necessarily hang out with her, but I found her to be pretty well written and its hard to hate anyone Haruka clearly treasures, I am very sad she is actually dead because up until the end of the game I kept thinking she was going to come back.
Part 4: Shinada:
We have come to a sudden stop. We start with a flashback to 1997 where Shinada has debuted as a baseball player for the wyverns, don't forget this moment because the rest of this section of the game constantly calls back to it. In the modern day Shinada is a loser who is really heavily indebt and lives in a weird grimey rooftop shack. He also now writes like ? smut articles ? And he's friend with a girl named Milky which is the craziest name I've ever heard. A loanshark who talks about his kids a lot constantly follows Shinada around and takes his money. There was a lot of promise with this gag, like maybe instead of letting me keep the 100k and still acting like I'm broke he shows up after every side mission to rob me but nope. At the end of the chapter we run into a masked man who is frankly just Daigo stealing Kiryu's disguise idea.
Shinada and loanshark (his name is Takasugi) walk around town looking for leads on uncovering the truth of Shinada's past. Because you see, Shinada one time got fired from baseball cuz everyone thought he cheated, oh you already knew that? yeah same but don't worry you'll hear it at least 40 more times. Daigo asked him to go look for clues about this, why does he care? I still don't know honestly. Takasugi is forcing him to go because...I guess money? and he's walking around with me and were acting like friends now for some reason. Shinada is incapable of having any agency for himself, he just does what people tell him to. He also keeps nearly dying like a looney tunes character with shit falling out of the sky and stuff. Eventually we find out the Nagoya family fixed the match and then some guy Shinada used to know does get smashed like a looney tunes character. Skip ahead, were called to help by Milky and she betrayed us. I am sad cuz I thought Milky was a friend for life. Turns out literally everyone Shinada knows aside from the fkn loanshark are evil, even the old baseball lady. This plot was so convoluted I frankly don't understand why they were doing what they were doing, all I know is they were more like a neighborhood watch situation then Yakuza even though they seemed to do the exact same thing. Also when I say literally everyone he knows is evil I mean everyone, even his old coach or whatever. For way too long I thought they meant the middle school baseball coach so I was hella confused. Anyways we then find out that actually Takasugi is Shinada's number one baseball fan. Okay? Anyways
Chapter 4 things finally pick up a little. Daigo reveals himself like anyone ever was doubting it was him, and he also reveals he cares because he went to highschool with Shinada. Is that fr how were connecting this? Daigo got expelled from highschool because he protected Shinada from a rival school. Once again, okay? I guess Shinada doesn't like that Daigo is a yakuza and punches him out the door. I wasn't a fan of this. Daigo goes down pretty easily, pitiful Daigo strikes again. I love him but can he do anything right? Anyways I guess the fight meant nothing cuz they're pals now and go to Tokyo together. We get a cut to Takasugi getting his money back from Shinada as well as a signed baseball...okay that's really cute I nearly cried. I wish they actually left it there but instead Shinada runs away last minute to meet up on that stupid baseball field from 1997 that we cant go 5 minutes without hearing about and we fight this guy named Sawada who was like the kind of mastermind and also the pitcher. Had Sawada not thrown an easy pitch, Shinada wouldn't have hit it and thus been kicked out for cheating. We fight some Omi then play baseball and OMG WHY ARE WE DOING THISSSSSS
Finally it ends and we go to Tokyo
Shinada final thoughts: If you cant tell I was not a fan of this. I found Shinada to be really inconsitently written. In side missions or when he's playing off of certain characters he's quite entertaining and un, but most of the time, he seems to just be a blank slate who does whatever and only talks about baseball. And omg maybe if I liked baseball this would have been the best thing ever but we did not need THAT much baseball talk or constant referencing to that baseball game in 1997. I get its central to his character but it became a meme how often he'd get misty eyed and talk about getting kicked out. Why did he move Nagoya to escape his image as a cheating baseball player when 1) he constantly talks about it anyways, 2) everyone literally knows who he is here anyways. They make it seem like at first he wants nothing to do with baseball anymore but he also goes to the batting cages all the time and also thinks about nothing but baseball. The plot here is just SO hard to follow and not at all what I want to be dealing with after we were really in the thick of things with part 3's ending. I'm not saying it was impossible for this to be good, I think there was so much potential here! Like seemingly all of Yakuza 4, the concepts are there but the execution is iffy. I think it's biggest downfall is when it happens. It would have made so much more sense to make the last section before the finale the Haruka section. Shinada would have felt much better to play as maybe as a part two or even a part three, but NOT part four. The odds were stacked against him being amongst a cast of characters that I already know and love. I definitely was more of a Tanimura fan, but I liked Shinada as a person. His inconsistent writing, unfortunate story, and tendency to be a little annoying really dragged this part of the game down for me.
Part 5: The Finale
This finale is crazyyyyyyy so strap in. I would expect nothing less then insanity from this game. First Kiryu shows up in Kamurocho WERE HOME BABYYYYYY. Were being followed by BABA!! I missed him. We fight for fun or something then we cut to Saejima who is meeting with the detective who tells us we gotta find Morinaga. OH YEAH THAT GUY. So we go to the Florist and we go to the arena only to find... AIZAWA??? The fuck? I thought Morinaga fuckin killed him cold blooded and made me think he was a cool as fuck villain. Only to find out that GASP Morinaga is actually dead. At this point I literally don't believe it because I guess I was in my era of not believing anyone ever dies.
We go to Akiyama who is told by Osaka ceo to not let Haruka perform. Akiayam says hell no. We also find out that Park and him planned to make Haruka and T-set a group and debut them at the same time but I somehow missed this when playing and didnt realize that till way leter. ANYWAY At some point we also see the CEO doing naked push ups in his penthouse which was so weird. ALSO there is a Date-san reveal. The scream I screamt! I didn't know I missed him or needing him so much in a game till I saw him again. Usually I'm wondering why he's even there or what he adds but I finally get it now, he adds being Date to the table and that's all you need.
Then I do a tower sweep at Kamurocho hills and OMG is this what Majima was building the whole time? To be fully honest it's beautiful and im very proud but its so different and lowkey off-putting. Kind of like Majima himself. I miss him. A whole game and I only be hearing about him second hand its not fair. Question, did literally anyone choose Saejima to do the tower sweep? Anyway were on the top of the tower; Kiryu, Saejima, CEO Katsuya, and Watase. We all have to fight eachother to draw out the one true bad guy and also cuz this is a yakuza game, so off our shirts go and everyone fights. Basically everyone gets shot and the bad guy is revealed... THE DETECTIVE. Who saw it coming? I still kept thinking Park would come back or Morinaga but by this point I was definitely suspecting him too. I don't fully get why he's doing all this but long story short he's purging both the Omi and Tojo of nice? Yakuza? I guess? I think it mostly has to do with him making way for his son to inherit a role in everything but thats not further explored till later. Not to worry tho! Daigo has shown up!!!! But because he is Daigo you should definitely be worried because once again he cant do anything right and he gets shot by Kanai. God dammit Daigo. He is now in critical condition, this is the SECOND TIME THIS HAS HAPPENED DAIGO. He's such a damsel in distress, never change.
Baba tells Haruka the message Kiryu had for her, to never give up. He also asks her to come with him to convince to Kiryu to chillax but she refuses. Sad for no one but me. At the New Serena, where that absolute BOP of a song is blaring, Kiryu is sleeping, while the rest of the crew are chilling and chatting. I forgot to mention Akiyama and Shinada briefly teamed up but frankly who cares. Shinada talks about baseball alot here too just incase you were worried he wouldnt. They conclude that detective bad guy is gonna attack Haruka's concert which I will NEVER allow. I guess Shinada's purpose here is actually tha the knows the stadiuk layout pretty well which I will buy in to. Also I believe here Haruka gets told about her and t-set being a band together now called Dreamline. I also dont love this. The idea of it is fine, Im all for a disney channel original movie plot where the bullies are actually great and we all become friends at the end but the issue is they don't properly develop T-set to do that. The short haired girl gets one little moment of being somewhat nice to Haruka then the very next time I see her she's stepping on my boss's broach and making me beg on my knees like sorry but it's really hard to come around on liking them. Even now when Haruka stumbles duing practice they're rude! This is a tragic ending if anything but Haruka seems happy I guess... Dont worry they will be nothing more then Haruka's glorifed backup dancers.
Okay final chapter, and it's a doozy. We send Shinada of all people to go help Haruka at the stadium, I know i just said I get he knows the layout of the stadium but like :( he's literally the only one who hasn't met her. I guess they don't end up interacting really anyways. Saejima is going to go after Majima because btw he's alive and at the top of the millenium tower. Akiyama and Kiryu stay on the ground to defend against attackers and they probably punch/ kick at least 10000 men. All the while Haruka gives her concert. But Baba is lurking and gonna shoot her, I thought he learned to be good again but whatever. Him and Shinada end up having a confrontation that ends in Baba losing and he's about to kill himself when !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my prison besties and the wardon show and up stop him! Oh my god I loved that so much what a nice resolution for Baba and I love that those guys went straight to a Jpop concert just for their pal. Meanwhile Saejima confronts Detective evil man on top of the millenium tower and !!! there he is, finally Majima is here. But he is not having a good time, turns out he's allowed himself to be captured and tortured for the sake of Haruka and now Majima and Saejima have to fight for the same reason. Then! Daigo shows up, while im literally begging him to actually shoot the bad guy but instead they all talk. Haruka is safe from harm (Baba wouldn't have done that shit anyways) and we officially learn about the plot of him attempting to put his son in charge of everything. Kiryu goes to Tojo headquarters to stop whoever this suspicious son is and Akiyama fights Kanai. Then literally all our friends ever show up to help and that was damn cute.
Kiryu shows up and it's eerie, completely silent with dead people everywhere. We go to the meeting room and the guy behind it all along was Aizawa. I definitely did not see that coming because I forgot he existed. But I suppose thats the point, he was so unassuming. I guess that means Morinaga actually was dead all along. We fight Aizawa while Haruka sings a song that seems very pointed at Kiryu wins (duh) but he is not doing well and tries to make his way through the streets. Meanwhile Haruka announces her retirement because she cant hide who she is or stay away from her family any longer and runs away to find Kiryu and THE GAME ENDS. Other games gave me a after credits scene that somewhat eased my concerns, but 5 is a overall very sad game and it's scene is her managing to him but he's bleeding out in the streets and falls unconcious in her arms.
Finale final thoughts: This was quite the finale! It was much better then Shinada's section but it was still a bit messy and left a lot of plot threads up in the air or had some unfortunate revelations. Nothing bad but things I think shouldve maybe been revealed earlier, like Aizawa. Only finding out with like 20 minutes of the game to go makes it feel too empty or even rushed when we know this game is otherwise not rushed at all. I was a little sad about the ending, I don't think it was bad at all I was just sad. The whole time I imagined it ending with the whole gang going to Haruka's concert and having a good time. For once I dont think the game fully dropped the ball on the finale like they tend to do so I commend it for that.
TLDOverall plot final thoughts: As a whole this is one of the most well written Yakuza stories since Yakuza 3 (obviously in my opinion). I can see that for some people all the plot twists and surprises might have felt like too much but I loved it, I never once could predict where this game was going. Morinaga dying off screen was such a let down and missed opportunity, at the end of Kiryu's section I was thinking he was going to be the best Yakuza villain in awhile but instead he went out in such a lame way. I do kinda wonder who killed him, I assumed it was just the detective guy but Aizawa seemed at least somewhat sad about Morinaga's death. I wonder if that was all a show? Another thing I dislike not just because of how it went, but also that it ended up going no where, Mayumi. They made quite the big deal about her at first and I do like the plot twist that she was a spy, but she wasn't even really acting any different when she was in spy mode and in normal mode. Plus you literally never see her again. I think Saejima's section was just very reminicent of his in 4, but done well. Aside from it taking quite so long to get to the city, by the time you leave it feels slightly rushed. I think the chapter in the woods didnt need to be its own thing. Absolutely no notes with Haruka, only that I'm sad this is all we will see of Park, I found her to be a really interesting character. Akiyama is where my main issues arise, only because I really do think he needed his whole section. He felt a little tacked on otherwise when I think he really didn't need to feel that way. I had hoped he would be part of half of Haruka's section then half of Shinada's where he is used to introduce us to Shinada as a character. But instead we get dropped into that like nothing. I know im probably the only one who cares about Hana this much but I really wish we got more of her. I basically said all my issues with Shinada at the end of his section but once again, I really didn't enjoy that plot. The finale was a mess and unfortunatly left at quite a cliff hanger which I wouldve rather it didn't but Im also okay with how it did. Some other things I wanted in this game was MORE MAJIMA I get why he wasnt for narrative purposes but Im gonna say that in every game. I wouldve loved more Okinawa orphan content. That being said there is way more content for them in this then in Y4 which is wild considering we spent like 5 seconds in Okinawa during a flashback and you never actually see them. It was so nice to hear what theyre up to second hand and some of the side missions expand on them a little more but I am devastated they werent there.
Lastly to briefly compare it to Y4, as they do feel like connected games. Y5 realy does feel like they took all of the concepts of the 4th game that needed to be reworked, and then re-did them to be better. The villains are better, prison break outs are better, and just like way more. I do think there are things in Y5 that are lacking compared to Y4, like general atmosphere, and I do think Tanimura's section in 4, as flawed as it is, is better then Shinadas. Akiyama's in 5 is great, but I love his in Y4 more simply because he doesn't have to share the spotlight. But I really have to emphasize, story and character are done better in Y5, ATMOSPHERE is done so much better in Y5.
TLDR for the TLDR: I liked this game :)
And there you have it, the longest goddamn review of all time. It was a really great game and I wish I could play it for the first time again because it was just SUCH a great experience. If you read this far I am so impressed by you and eternally grateful you even cared to. Please let me know your thoughts! I'm so excited to talk about this game with people. As for my rating, It was going to be a 10/10 until I got to Shinada's section now I'm in between an 8 or a 9. Ill just say 8/10 to be mean.
I am already neck deep in Yakuza 0 so I'm excited to write a much shorter review for that one soon.
Thank you for reading!

(Hello, long time observer, first time caller!)
The year is 2024, and things are not looking good for the Democrats.
Joe Biden is constantly plagued by infighting within his ranks. The Democratic Party, in addition to being hamstrung by institutions that are by nature biased towards conservatives, like the innate design of the Senate, and the conservative makeup of the Supreme Court, are constantly struggling with infighting by the purist far-left, and the impotent center. On one side, they are dealing with an increasingly irrational “far-left” that refuses to the see the bigger picture of defeating Trump, as well as dealing with a middling center that frequently resorts to “both-sideism” and shrugs their shoulders instead of calling out the clear threat of Republican rule. On top of that, the Democrats have been OBSESSED with decorum, following the rules, ALWAYS compromising, and holding their members to higher standards as Republicans refuse to do so. Do you see the Republicans compromising? Following norms? Nope. The Republican apparatus, from Mitch McConnell to the fringes of the Freedom Caucus, are constantly moving in lockstep, pushing their right-wing vision through the finish line. Some, like political scientist David Faris, argue that Democrats must realize that "It's Time to Fight Dirty", after years of pussyfooting around, finally, at long last? It's as the old saying goes, “Democrats fall in love, Republicans fall in line”. It’s a situation worthy of a Greek Tragedy….
….Or is it?
Because if you speak to the average Republican voter, they will absolutely not agree with what I wrote above. Rather, it is the Democrats who are enacting win after win, and getting their left-wing agenda through their finish line while the middling Republicans trip over their shoelaces. Left-wing activists, like Antonio Gramsci, have conducted a Long March Through The Institutions, like a nation proudly marching through the battlefield and conquering their enemies. The liberals control everything.The culture. The education system. The legal system. The youth. Republicans have lost the Culture War, a war that men like Chris Rufo argue that the Right barely even attempted to fight as the Radical Left had their eyes on the ball, onwards through the battlefield. Marching on. The Left has always possessed a machiavellian spirit, and an ironclad grip on every avenue that we as Americans hold dear. Men like Jon Askonas, looking at the rubble of conservatism, ponder "Why Conservatism Failed". That’s how much the Left has won! The ideology of Conservatism itself is DEAD! Meanwhile, the conservative movement, or shall I say, Conservatism Inc., is obsessed with maintaining tired platitudes about “small government” and “low taxes” as Democrats are focused on controlling every inch of the American body. Conservatives aren’t winning, they are impotently flailing. Pathetic.
Does that really make sense? Are both the political right and the political left united in lockstep, but weak and plagued with endless infighting? Can both sides be obsessed with playing the rules and compromising, but also be steadfastly seizing control of all major institutions?
A lot of the above is me rambling, but I believe this ties back to what Gallup has reported recently, as “most Americans (71%) say that, on the issues that matter to them, their side in politics has been losing more often than winning. Just a quarter say their side has been winning more often than losing.” The article also mentions that this varies based on which party is in power, and is right now "eight-in-ten Republicans and Republican-leaning independents (83%)" as well as "six-in-ten Democrats and Democratic leaners (62%)". But this a sentiment I have noticed the past several years. Dare I say, “Both sides”, having identical complaints about their political allies.
Republican voters complain that their side is obsessed with following norms, espousing platitudes, and playing by the Democrats' rules, while the Democrats are motivated and pressing forward with their left-wing agenda.
Democratic voters complain that their side is obsessed with following norms, espousing platitudes, and playing by the Republicans’ rules, while the Republicans are motivated and pressing forward with their right-wing agenda.
Our side is obsessed with compromise. Their side never compromises.
Our side is obsessed with preserving “muh norms”. Their side couldn’t give a shit about norms.
Our side is constantly held to a higher standard. Their side is constantly treated with kid gloves.
Our side is fighting with a knife. Their side is fighting with a gun.
Our side always holds ourselves accountable. Their side never holds themselves accountable.
Now, I am someone who leans more on the political left (especially the economic left), but this is a sentiment I see expressed by a lot of Republican and Democratic voters, who both feel like they are the unfairly maligned underdog.
The staticy of our current federalist, two party, FPTP system creates a significant amount of deadlock, especially as the two parties realign on class, geographic, and educational lines. Landslide elections are becoming less and less common. Neither Republicans nor Democrats seem to have the ability to break through landslide sweeps and reshape the country with a governing mandate, instead dealing with gridlock and incrementalism that is inherent to the American experiment.
I believe this situation leads to both groups of voters turning back to a comforting narrative of how their side is effectively persecuted by various forces. How their side is always held to a higher standard compared to the opposition. How they have been plagued historically by infighting and a fetish for norms and holding your pinky up.
Now, I’m not giving my opinions on which side is correct. Democrats are at a disadvantage in the Senate (I think that is partially due to Democrats bleeding away rural votes over decades). Republicans are at a disadvantage in mainstream culture (I think that is due to an incompatibility with social conservatism and capitalism, but that’s another discussion for another day).
I am simply stating that I have observed this exact same sentiment among both Republican and Democratic voters/pundits. Whether it’s left-leaning internet forums, or conservative talk radio, I see and hear the exact same lines, but flip a few words. How our side is impotent, infighting, and constantly snatching defeat from the jaws of victory, unlike our enemies. Republicans and Democrats, faced with years or decades of painful incrementalism, at best, resort back to the same narrative. Our side is weak and divided, their side is strong and united.

First of all congrats to all 2024 graduates.
This is a long one so yea. My dad has always been a pretty much absent father. Especially financially, with my mom buying us everything we’ve needed , we being my sister and I. I have vivid memories of my dad calling and saying he’s come pick us up for us to spend time with him, only for him to arrive at 10 PM to give us a $10 bill and kiss good bye. we saw him occasionally. We’ve maybe been with a total of 10-20 times throughout the entirety our lives. But as we got older we realized that we weren’t a priority of his.
Right around when COVID hit though my dad began to come around a lot more. But not in the way u may be thinking. See my dad got into hard drugs, with his then gf. Lost my baby brother to CPS, and was basically homeless. So he invited himself to our home, sleeping in my moms car at night and sometimes my mom being the god send that she is was nice enough to let him come in and eat when it got colder out. This was the worst time of my life concerning my father . I saw him in a completely different light and thought very little of him. It just completely stunned me that the only way my dad would come to see his kids is if he had nowhere else to go. He , as most drug addicts was in and out of jail, until one time when he had to stay for a few months longer , and then spent a few months in a halfway house. All throughout this and before my mom never really spoke ill of my father , unless she was arguing with him about some bull shit he was doing while being a druggy and hanging around our house, like doing drugs in our basement. But she always encouraged or even forced us to communicate with him, and try to forgive/ build a relationship with him. Aswell as countless times of my mom helping this man. Giving him money, rides, clothes, and wtv else he asked for.
Well after my dad went to jail that last time and was in the halfway house, he came out a new man. He kicked his drug habit, got his CDL license and was doing great. My sister and I were very proud of him and wanted to give him another chance. We spent 4th of July with him, and hung out with him a couple more times just driving around in his car. And just in general we’re a little closer and more communicative.
Fast forward to the 2 main incidents that led to him not being invited to my graduation . So as I was heading over to a friends house one day my car cut out. My mom was at work with a client (she’s a hairdresser) so I naively thought I could call my dad. He showed up took a look under my hood and realized that id need to get it towed. So I took the initiative to start calling tow companies and try to find the cheapest one. I luckily manage to find a guy that would do it for only $65 . Which if you’re an adult you know how much of an insanely good deal that is. Whilst I’m calling tow companies my dad has spent this time complaining about my moms choice in cars , and basically blaming her for my car cutting out. And also trying to call his sister so he could borrow a tool she had to just hitch my car to her truck and tow it himself. He can’t get ahold of her so I bring up the $65 tow guy. This man starts complaining saying he can do it for free and just wait for his sister to pick it up. Anothe 30 minutes go by and nothing. So i call my mom, and ask her can she cashapp me. Of course she says yes. So I call the tow man myself to get my car towed. The entire time this man is complaining about paying $65 fucking dollars, complaining about my mom buying the car , and complaining saying I hope she doesn’t expect me to pay for this. Mind you he has a CDL license, so he’s making good money and can more then afford to pay it . He paid $30,000 for his car cash and was able to save this money up for it in only a few months, so u do that math for how much he makes. At first I was ignoring him letting him talk shit. But he just kept going on and on and on, and I finally snapped and told him to stop talking about my mom and began defending her. We got into a heated argument that ended with him saying don’t ask him for anything, and me assuring him that I won’t. I had started crying because of how frustrated I was at the situation . I was asking something so little of him and this is how he acted? And he made fun of that saying “I’m not going to cry about it either” this was the last straw and I vowed to never reach out to him again.
I kept that vow despite my moms continuous efforts to get me to talk to him/ unblock him/ forgive him , but I was done. My 18th birthday roles around a few months later. And I decided to be nice and invite him, my thought process was I’m going to college soon , and won’t see him for probably the 4 yrs that id be gone away to school. So why not just try. I didn’t ask this man for anything and just told him where the place of my party was. The time comes and my mom and I are a little late to my party about 10-15 minutes late to getting to the place. He begins texting me asking where we are , and I say we’re a few minutes late, but otw and just resend the address . He starts making excuses saying oh he has work he has to go and wtv else. I say ok that’s fine . He says oh I have a gift I wanted to give you. I say oh you could bring it later when ur off or we could meet somewhere for me to get it tmrw. The next day roles around and I ask him if he worked today and when I could meet him to get the gift. Then he starts talking bs saying, oh I already gave it to ur mom, with the child support card. I’m thinkin oh maybe he can put more money on it and did that for me , for my bday. But no he was referring to the money he is mandated to pay by the state , which he just began paying for the last year or he so he’d been driving trucks. So once I realized this I decided to tell him how bad of a father he was, and yes I did disrespect him and curse him out and I didn’t care. This was really the final straw and I wanted to give him a piece of my mind. And that I did. This is where he really fucked up though. He texted my mom saying to give me the childsupprt card for my bday. My mom uses the $400/ month he pays for our utilities and has them on autopay. And idrc what anyone thinks about that I think it’s a very appropriate use of it. Especially since she pays for wtv else we need and want with no complaints . So she tells him it’s sad that has nothing to give his daughter on her 18th birthday and not to text her phone with the bs telling her what to do with the money. Ig this upsets him because he brings up something’s of my moms past , during a time that was really hard for her. And that was it for my mom. She cut him off too, and though she has not hate for him, she says she’s done allowing people in her life that do nothing but take advantage of and disrespect her. I was relieved to finally have my mother stop pressuring me to spend time with my father, and happy to be done with the stress and pain that he usually causes when he’s around.
Fast forward to now , my Graduation was last week. I only had 8 tickets . And I had already decided to give tickets to my grandma , her 5 kids (my mom , aunts , and uncles) my sister and my favorite cousin. A few days before the graduation whilst at school, a teacher pulls me aside and asks me did Ik my dad tried to come up to my school to get a graduation ticket . I laughed this off. The day of my graduation comes and I find out he was at the place of the graduation trying to find me. I was relieved that we didn’t bump into one another because I truthfully don’t want to see him. But later I felt a little bad when thinking about how he tried to come to the school then still came to the graduation despite not being let in obviously for the lack of a ticket. I don’t know why but my mom is in the same boat feeling guilty that he wasn’t let in on such a big moment. And has began some of her old antics of saying oh can he come to ur graduation party (not the ceremony but a family celebration) my guilt however doesn’t extend this far, and I just can’t give this man yet another opportunity to disappoint me. So what do you think Reddit , am I the asshole?

Mikan has a habit of pondering many things while waiting for her mother to use the restroom. It is not aimless daydreaming, but rather akin to how some people would keep different books by their bedside, toilet, and office. Mikan always use this time to think about light but continuous things. Typically, she'd spend three to five minutes, with the first minute warming up, recalling where she left off in the book from the last time, then staring at her nails, progressing her thoughts bit by bit.
She developed this habit during her first visit to the zoo. That spring, she graduated from kindergarten, and before leaving the house, her mother was in front of the mirror, adjusting Mikan’s elementary school uniform. The zoo was on a seaside cliff, connected to the foot of the mountain by a narrow path lined with cherry blossoms. Children of all ages sat on the steps, waiting for a gust of wind to blow so they could shout for their mothers to take pictures. Mikan buried her head and walked up, thinking the others were childish. At that time, her father was still young; his neck had not yet thickened, and his eyelids had not drooped. When they left, she asked her mother who the strange uncle was, the one who knew so much about giraffes. She couldn’t remember how her mother answered, but she remembered seeing a kitten lying on the hillside, showing its belly to the sunset, making her exclaim "wow" to the cherry blossoms. From that day on, one weekend a month, she would go to the zoo with her mother to meet her father. During the time her mother was in the restroom, Mikan used it to think about the kitten. She had imagined raising three kittens: the first was tortoiseshell, then an orange one like her surname, and the latest was another tortoiseshell. Each cat lived for twelve years, and she thought about the world and herself thirty-six years later.
She didn’t always think about cats. Occasionally, when she didn’t go with her mother, she would talk with her classmates about how they envied the animals in the zoo, like gorillas and hyenas. Although there were no lions or tigers, there were lynxes. They looked so ugly, walking on all fours all their lives, but they were lucky to live by the sea and enjoy the sea breeze for a lifetime. The crude boys in her class would retort, saying, "Yeah, yeah, they can even poop directly into the sea."
After graduation, she never saw that boy again. All the boys would go to Tokyo when they were young; that was the rule. Only when they were old and decrepit would they be reluctantly sent back by the younger ones. But she often thought about that classmate. By the time she raised her third cat, he might have come back. When she saw the sea again, the image of a smooth butt hanging over the cliff came to mind. When she got into Waseda University, she told her mother that she might consider marrying that classmate.
When Mikan was little, she secretly asked her father how he fell in love with her mother. The primate area always had a strange smell, between animal and human. Her mother didn’t like the smell, standing five meters away near the door for ventilation (they couldn’t go further in because they were not allowed to meet outside the guardian’s sight; that was the rule). She didn’t remember what her father said, but she remembered pressing her hand against the glass, with an orangutan looking at her disdainfully. She felt like she was the one being watched. But her father must have said something, without hesitation, as if talking about a daily matter. It was too mundane, overshadowed by the contemptuous orangutan in her memory.
Influenced by her mother, Mikan also didn’t like the smell of the primate area. It wasn’t that it was unpleasant; it was like touching the residual warmth of someone who just left their seat, the mixed smell of decaying wood and butter in old temples, awkward and cautious. The only chance she almost had to be alone with that classmate was during a field trip. Both happened to be lingering at the entrance of the primate area. Mikan was there first, then the boy appeared behind her, peeking around. The introduction at the entrance had been scanned five or six times. Inside, the darkness reminded Mikan of the anteater’s mouth she had just seen. The boy asked, “Are you afraid to go in?” Mikan replied, “Of course not.” The boy retorted, “Coward, the teacher said not to wander off; you definitely won’t dare.” Mikan suddenly felt annoyed and walked in. When she reached the orangutan’s window and looked back, the boy had already disappeared. Mikan thought, childish.
One summer, a cat sneaked into the zoo and was brutally tortured by baboons before being killed. Mikan learned about it from the morning paper, crumbs scattered on it. The front page was about US-Japan trade friction, followed by news about Tokyo, Syria, obituaries, nuclear, and the next Olympics’ sailing event being held on the local beach. The news was arranged from far to near, and finally, in the middle column, she saw this news.
"Such a pity, so sad, so heartbreaking, so infuriating." She inhaled deeply and exhaled.
She didn’t know what this incident meant for the townspeople. Didn’t the middle column mean it was unimportant? She didn’t understand, but the townspeople seemed outraged, eventually passing a resolution to lower the male zoo supervision age to fourteen. The next day, this proposal moved to the front page, although not the headline, it stood alongside news from the US and Europe.
But this wasn’t a distant matter for her. Recently, she had joined the baseball team because that boy also loved baseball. At a celebration party, when discussing future high schools, he talked eagerly about a famous school in Tokyo, jokingly preparing for life there. Everyone laughed at this joke.
The front-page news explained the lawmakers' logic: due to men’s violence and animalistic nature, our country decided to confine men in zoos years ago, something we have always been proud of. Over the years, many outstanding women have joined the country to restrain their husbands' potential harm to the world. But our solution isn’t perfect. When does a child become a man? The radicals believe it’s at adulthood, at twenty, the legal marriage age. Conservatives argue that maleness is in the chromosomes and should be separated at the hospital. The incident with the baboons harming the cat further proves the harm of violence and animality to civilization. We should be more cautious and responsible. Thus, in our town, the second sex characteristic is used as the basis for identifying males.
This event was written into textbooks, leading to significant zoo renovations. Besides old mothers bringing their children to see their fathers, the zoo now provided spaces for the new generation of women to date their boyfriends in the park. For the town’s zoo, this room added at the end of the primate area, with rain hitting the iron roof, animal calls (and conversations from the men’s park) and the sound of waves hitting the cliffs, seemed far from a suitable place for romance. Mikan had never been there.
She never saw that boy again, though he didn’t play baseball. He likely lived the life he joked about, pooping off the cliff.
When her mother came out of the restroom, Mikan was imagining holding the tortoiseshell cat that had just died. She remembered her father saying that the zoo’s most famous animal was a giraffe, but it was a specimen, transported from Tokyo Zoo, always standing in the most conspicuous place. He saw it every morning as if it were still alive. She asked if he would become a specimen too, but she couldn’t remember his answer (she always remembered her questions but not others’ answers).

Hi all!
I'm very new to 3D printing and got a printer couple weeks ago thanks to a friend who was upgrading his, and sold me his old one. It's an Alfawise U20.
Since I've had it, I was able to do one successful print, but it was really luck. I've had probably over 30 attempts at making anything. My levelling is good, I'm respecting the temperature of the filament, but the PTFE tube keeps getting plugged by the filament melting inside of it.
The filament I use is brand new and seems to be good quality (at least that's what my friend said). It's an "Ultra Silk PLA" from RYON that asks for a nozzle temp between 190-220°C, and bed temp between 50-70°C.
It took me a while to understand exactly what was the problem until I did. At every print, after a few minutes and the printing going well, suddenly, nothing would come out of the hot end. When removing the PFTE tube, I'd see the filament clogging the tube. So I thought maybe I was too high (around 210°C) but here's when the annoying part starts.
At 190-200°C, nothing would come out at all or it would be a very, very low flow, making my print just, not do anything, printing every X mm. But at 210-220°C, the filament would melt inside of the tube, clogging it, and preventing me from continuing my print since nothing would come out of the bed again.
I know the Alfawise U20 isn't a top of the line printer, and I mostly wanted to get it so I could "Get through hell, know how it works and troubleshoot before getting something actually good".
I tried tinkering around with the flow rate and the print speed on Cura but my problem stayed the same.
I tried fixing it alone since my friend couldn't find the problem, but I'm close to giving up and just plugging it off.
I hope my post is good enough, and I hope it's not too much of a dumb problem that people will get mad at me for daring to post this in here, but I'd really appreciate the help. 🙏
Thank you very much!!

So I (M22) have been in 1 relationship (4Months) so far which also didn't work. And this was 3 years ago. I look decent (6'2 height n decent muscle structure), get compliments from people around me for my looks. I am not stupid, people have told me I have a air of credibility and responsibility around me and this gives off a really good first impression, even professors have said the same. I also have decent sense of humour if I match the vibes with them.
Since my last relationship, I wasn't ready for another one till January this year. From January this year I started to get a feeling that I am ready for a relationship and started looking for people from that perspective (whether they can be a good partner or not for me)
I met this girl (23F) in april 1st week (she had a bf). And we matched the vibes instantly. We would never run out of topics to talk about... Just random things out of nowhere. We were shockingly similar. Our family dynamics, our age difference with siblings, relatives, friends almost everything has been the same. The only difference in our upbringing is she's a girl and I'm a boy. There have been instances when she was telling about her family and I completed the story/ incident and vice-versa. We both played dare game... And gave embarrassing dares to each other (none of us faltered). We listen to the same songs, have same hobbies.... It's like carbon copy of mine.
We talked about what we looked in our ideal partner, what does our ideal family look like, and what not.... Again everything matched.
The night when I realised this we were on a beach (it's illegal to be on beach after midnight but we were there till sunrise) having drinks. I was too drunk at the moment but the next day my heartbeat increased, my face would get red n stuff whenever she's around... I became conscious of her presence. Soon we started holding hands when alone, she'll rest her chin on my shoulder on bike, she'll take my arm and put it on her shoulder, she'll bite me randomly (she likes it), she'll play with my hand & fingers, with my hair, & neck... She'll come and sit beside me in a group, rest her hand on me n all... All these things in public were limited to a certain level of intensity but when we were alone these small things would be more intense, we'll be so close as to hear each other's breath while playing with out hands and fingers n all. I asked about her current relationship but she didn't say anything on it... She just said it going, we'll see happens and decide accordingly, we don't have any plans n things along those lines
It took a week to process the feelings since it had been really long that I've had these feelings. Things didn't change untill last night (again on beach with drinks but still sober) I expressed my feelings for her. And she rejected me saying she has a bf and doesn't want to "ruin" her relationship.
When I asked about the special moments we shared and that I wanted those moments to keep happening, she just told that those moments weren't special for her.
I tried explaining that the level of similarities we have is not common to find... And these similarities in care values is what people search for their whole lives in their partner. In the end she didn't changed her mind.
It's understandable, she has a bf but then why did she did those gestures that are not common among friends. Her actions, expressions and gestures till that night told a different story than her words last night.
I'm just heartbroken now, I have to go through the whole process of healing from a heartbreak again, idk when I'll feel I'm ready again and idk what'll happen next. I was just looking for a decent person.

I saw so many recommendations for the DARE book, and I found it on Amazon along with a cute workbook so I bought them. I just started reading the book last night but I couldn’t get too far due to a really bad headache..
I really need this to help me look at and cope with my anxiety better. I go for month long anxiety spells and random attacks at times and I am so afraid of my bodily sensations that it sends me into a bigger panic. I have seen nothing but great reviews on this book, and I really hope they are real.. I so desperately need this to help me..
I’ve been suffering from panic attacks, DP/DR, ocd, depression and constant regular and health anxiety for ever.. the panic attacks got worse about 10 years ago and have been consistent in my life.. I never wanted to be this person, and of course.. I became this person. I’m not so anxious that I am the typical stereotype, but I get to the point where I do make excuses on why I shouldn’t go or why I can’t go or find fault with everything, so I can brace myself for the worst.. it’s something I’ve always hated about myself, and I know it is related to trauma from my childhood.. I’m working on that too but it’s hard when your mind doesn’t remember the trauma but your body does..
If you have any success stories with using the DARE method, or any other thing.. please let me know. I am so tired of being tired…

Who's to blame: Overbearing family, or college student?
I’m a 19-year-old black guy, and I’ve been grappling with some serious family issues concerning my mother and grandparents. It's a lot to unpack, so buckle up:
Growing up, it was just my mother and I, as my dad was in and out of the picture due to my parents' divorce. My grandparents played a significant role too, doting on me since I was an only child, and my mother was also the sole child in her family. Given our circumstances, my mother tended to be excessively protective, perhaps stemming from my early years spent in and out of hospitals due to medical concerns. Being the center of attention came with the territory, I suppose.
At 17, I began experimenting with substances like nicotine, weed, and alcohol with my best friend, a common scenario among kids my age. I’d sneak around, hiding these escapades from my mother. Freshman year in college rolled around, and so did more experimentation. Unfortunately, someone from my friend circle spilled the beans about my college shenanigans to my mother and their parents, leading to increased suffocation when I returned home. I got banned from my best friend's house for a period of time because of it. Additionally, my mother caught me high once, further worsening the situation. To me, it all felt blown out of proportion, considering it was typical teen/young adult behavior from the peers I was around.
Continuing my transition into college life, my mother never really provided a safe space for open communication. It felt like she was always breathing down my neck, fostering an environment of secrecy. As they say, strict parents breed sneaky kids. Moreover, my family’s insistence on regular church attendance felt stifling.
As I matured, my mother's grip seemed to tighten, suffocating any semblance of space I needed. More often than not, we clashed, and she persistently pushed for a closer bond. With that made coming home for breaks a struggle, and enjoyment going back to school after the breaks were over.
By sophomore year, I found myself delving into my studies as needed, hookup culture, a little bit of partying, piercings, more drugs, and then dating. The girl I was seeing didn’t attend my college but lived nearby. We clicked on a dating site and in real life, and I’d occasionally visit her place once we got comfortable with the idea. Her parents didn't know at first but didn't really care once they found out. In fact, once they met me, they came to like me because of my character and career plans. Though my mother and grandmother reacted with disdain at her and my actions, criticizing her career choice in cosmetology, her White ethnicity, and her action to bring me to her parent's house while they weren't there. With those factors, they accused her of being promiscuous, which is nowhere near the case.
Academically, I’m pursuing an engineering degree, managing to maintain my scholarships despite knowing I could do better. Fast forward to yesterday: I was discussing my grades with my grandmother, with my mother present. Which felt like a horrible mistake as my mother brought up my choices and who I was sleeping with, which snowballed into my mother prying the truth out of me in front of my grandmother. It was so bad my mother wanted to answer my grandmother's questions for me, with an irritated smile on her face, but luckily my grandmother shut her down and waited for my honest responses, which I for the most part gave.
During the conversation about the girl, my grandmother and mother made a joke about me being on a leash like my dog, which, in hindsight, felt more like mockery than humor. Moreover, my grandmother's ominous warning about potential legal consequences if I continued to visit her house against my family's wishes was unsettling. She claimed to have connections to the local police department near my school, which added an extra layer of fear and coercion. With that said my grandmother felt that I'd be better off locked up than be at the girl's house because of unreasonable safety reasons.
Additionally, my mother and grandma resorted to comparing me unfavorably to my cousin, who dropped out of college and got a girl pregnant. This comparison only served to exacerbate tensions and feelings of inadequacy.
Reflecting on everything, I made the tough call to end my relationship to appease my family. They judged her based on superficial criteria, and I couldn’t bear to subject her to their scrutiny any longer, so we broke up.
My relationship with my dad isn’t without its tensions, but he’s the one who speaks candidly, even if his words aren’t sugar-coated. After recent events, tensions with my mother have escalated. I yearn for her to loosen her grip, to allow our relationship to evolve naturally rather than being forced. I could say the same thing about my grandfather as well, but he only stays involved in my academic life.
My friends and my now ex agree – my family’s stance on my relationship and actions was wild. So, I'd like to know, am I 100% at fault or does my family have a part to play? Please help me figure this out. There's still a little bit of tension between me and my mother.

First of all I'm sorry, English is not my first language.
I (almost 19 male) have a brother and he (17 male) is autistic (When he was little he was much more severe, now he can do almost everything without problems) , as I mentioned, and this year he must decide what to study; Whether to continue with a high school diploma or vocational training... The issue is that my parents (both in their 50s) won't stop talking about him as if he couldn't go to high school, it seems like they don't even give him the option.
I know very well that they don't see him as capable, even though he is, if he wants to, he would be. I say this because while I was studying I also had problems, very similar to his, although not as noticeable and in the same subjects.
I know it's because of his autism but that's not what bothers me. What bothers me is that for them my brother's autism only exists academically, socially or any other aspect of his life does not exist for them when he clearly has more problems socially. An example of this, the most recent, is that he met a friend; He was the last to leave and he told this as it is, that the rest had left before. My parents told him off when they knew more than enough that my brother is bad at reading social situations.
So, I want to talk to my parents about how unfair this is but I don't dare because it's not my problem and I don't know if I'll look like an idiot for thinking that way about them.

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In his office, The Badass Sheriff is sitting on his chair, his legs up on the desk, sleeping peacefully. There's nothing going on, so it's his break time. An hour and a half later, someone gently knocks on the door a few times, then Clyde wakes up. 'Hm? I wonder who that could be!', he thinks as he stands up from the chair. Leaping over the desk like the cool badass he is, Clyde approaches the door and opens it. Oh, it's a weird guy! He's sweating a bit for some reason. With a friendly smile on his face, The Badass Sheriff starts to talk to him...
"Greetings! What brings you to my office, bud?"
The weird guy silently gulps and looks over his shoulder, then looks back at Clyde.
"Is there something wrong? Someone following ya?"
He shakes his head no. The mute grey adult points to The Badass Sheriff's shotgun, then himself, and does the cut throat gesture. Clyde curiously tilts his head.
"You.. want me to kill you, huh? How odd, no weird guy who visited me has asked me to kill them before. Any particular reason why you want to die?"
The weird guy mouths the word, 'Freedom.'. Clyde nods a little, still smiling.
"Alright, pal. But, first.. do you not want to be still alive?"
He shakes his head no, again.
"Hmm, okay then."
The Badass Sheriff walks up to his weapon and picks it up, he cocks it. Approaching the weird guy, he stands in front of him.
"Are ya ready?"
The mute grey adult gives him a thumbs up. Oh? He's trying to smile... he's tearing up now... He did it, even though he's in a LOT of pain and has tears running down his face, the weird guy is smiling. The poor, poor fella.. Clyde aims his shotgun at his face.
"Last chance; are you sure you don't want the safe way?"
No response. Red text pops up next to The Badass Sheriff.
WHAT ARE YOU D-
*BANG!*
NOOO!!
*BANG!*
WHY THE FLUFF DID YOU KILL HIM!?!
Suddenly, one of the chairs in the office begins flying at Clyde at a high speed, he manages to catch it instantly. He died once before, but he really isn't afraid of death anyways. The Badass Sheriff grins bravely.
"Not today, big guy. And to answer your question: The weird guy requested me to, so I fulfilled it."
HE *WHAT*!!?
The sky in the game starts to glitch out for a while, the players outside at the park are getting scared and freaking out.
"Ya heard me loud and clear! I wouldn't mind doing it again just to spite you."
DON'T YOU FLUFFING DARE..!
IF YOU KILL ANOTHER ONE, I WILL SHOW YOU NO MERCY! AND NO ONE WILL EVER CONVINCE ME TO REVIVE YOU AGAIN!!
"Pssh, as if that's gonna happen, Candlesticks."
...
I AM WARNING YOU, YOU ASSHOLE.
DO. NOT. EVER. DO. THAT. *AGAIN*!
The Badass Sheriff chuckles cheerfully.
"Alright, alright, just go, buddy."
SHUT THE FLUFF UP.
The weird guy's body has disappeared as they were talking. Clyde shuts the door, and calmly returns to sit at his desk. Putting his weapon back to where it was, he lifts his legs up on the desk once more. The Badass Sheriff sighs in relief.
He truly enjoys messing with the owner of the game. Seeing him pissed off sure is entertaining!
...
I FLUFFING HATE THAT GUY!
IF I COULD KILL HIM, I WOULD. THOUGH, A CERTAIN FRIEND HAS BEGGED ME NOT TO.
HE IS PISSING ME OFF INTENTIONALLY, I JUST KNOW IT..!
AND *YOU*...
LEAVE BEFORE I DO SOMETHING THAT YOU WILL NOT LIKE.
BYE.
​

I've been looking to score some cash and I know a lot of you don't have much money to spend. Also I love to teach. So I'll make you a deal: I'll do my absolute best to help you win a prize in your next OTB tournament in return for 90% of the profit (prize money minus your entry fee). For the memes (and to cover some expenses) I will also charge sixty-nine cents per lesson.
Now, there are reasons why you shouldn't hire me. I'll list as many as I can think of, but if I've missed any put them in the comments - I'll respond/edit this post if I agree. If at all possible I'd like you help you make a good choice, so:
Don't do this if:

• You haven't got your mind set on entering a U900, U1200, or U1500 OTB tournament within 4 weeks. I'm willing to consider other formats but a prize or some form of compensation needs to be involved.
  
• You mind being coached by a 1980? Lichess classical player. I can teach like nobody you've met (I've taught multiple skills over the last 9 years) and you'll enjoy every minute. But there's a non-zero chance you might learn some bad habits that GMs understand and I do not.
  
• You care about playing a beautiful game. I'll teach you the ugliest possible type of chess, the one where you're losing half the game but very often win because your opponent did an oopsie. Here's a perfect example where I play as black.
  
• You actually have no choice but to win. Don't bet large sums of money on yourself - I'm extremely decent as a teacher and am willing to explain/justify every choice I make, but none of my students have won a tournament yet. If you're entering a tournament it has to be for your love of the game.
  

Think of me as the experimental, dare-devil sensei with a disturbing amount of undiagnosed ADHD. I love to put myself in a difficult teaching situation and see how I'll overcome - no matter whether you win or you lose, we'll both be much improved at the end.
Comment below with your timezone if you want in. I have two students and time for another.

Jealousy has nothing to do with love. In fact, your so-called love also has nothing to do with love.
These are beautiful words which you use without knowing what.they mean, without experiencing what they mean. You go on using the word 'love'. You use it so much that you forget the fact that you have not experienced it yet. That is one of the dangers of using such beautiful words: 'God', 'love', NIRVANA, 'prayer' beautiful words. You go on using them, you go on repeating them, and by and by, the very repetition makes you feel as if you know.
What do you know about love? If you know anything about love, jealousy is never present in love. And wherever jealousy is present, love is not present.
Jealousy is not part of love, jealousy is part of possessiveness. Possessiveness has nothing to do with love. You want to possess. Through possession you feel strong: your territory is bigger. And if somebody else tries to trespass on your territory, you are angry. Or if somebody has a bigger house than your house, you are jealous. Of if somebody tries to dispossess you of your property, you are jealous and angry.
If you love, jealousy is impossible; it is not possible at all.
Jealousy has nothing to do with love. If you love your woman, how can you be jealous? If you love your man, how can you be jealous? If your woman is laughing with somebody else, how can you be jealous? You will be happy: it is your woman who is happy; her happiness is your happiness. How can you think against her happiness?
But look, watch. It is happening everywhere, in every family. The wife even becomes jealous of the newspaper if the husband goes on reading it too much. She comes and snatches it away: she becomes jealous. The newspaper is substituting for her. While she is present, how dare you read your newspaper? That is an insult! When she is there you have to be possessed by her totally not even a newspaper... The newspaper becomes a competitor.
So what to say about human beings? If the wife is present, and the husband starts talking to another woman and looks a little happy - which is natural: people get tired of each other; anything new and one feels a little thrilled - now the wife is angry. You can know well that if a couple is going by and the man looks sad, then he is the husband married to that woman. If he looks happy, he is not married to the woman. She is not HIS wife.
You are not really in love with your woman, or with your man, or with your friend. If you are in love, then his or her happiness is your happiness. If you are in love, then you will not create any possessiveness.
Love is capable of giving total freedom. ONLY love is capable of giving total freedom. And if freedom is not given, then it is something else, not love. It is a certain type of egoistic trip.
You have a beautiful woman. You want to show everybody, all around the town, that you have a beautiful woman - just like a possession. Just as when you have a car and you are into your car, you want everybody to know that nobody has such a beautiful car. The same is the case with your woman. You bring diamonds for her, but not out of love. She is a decoration for your ego. You carry her from one club to another, but she has to remain clinging to you and go on showing that she belongs to you. Any infringement of your right and you are angry - you can kill the woman... whom you think you love.
There is great ego working everywhere. We want people to be like things. We possess them like things, we reduce persons into things. The same is the attitude about things also.
That is the mind - continuously in competition. Now he is doing circumcision; he has to do something. That is the way we are living: the way of the ego. The ego knows no love, the ego knows no friendship, the ego knows no compassion. The ego is aggression, violence.
Jealousy never follow love as a shadow.
Never.
Love makes no shadow at all. Love is so transparent that it makes no shadow. Love is not a solid thing, it is transparency. No shadow is created out of love. Love is the only phenomenon on the earth which creates no shadow.

first previous next
Essemi chapter
The Defender of Virtues was … Well, at least it was capable of moving around, which was rather impressive considering its age. It was built during the Aviel succession crisis, more than a century ago. It was, at the time, a brilliant display of engineering.
To be honest, its sheer size was still impressive, and it was probably better to command it than a smaller, more recent ship. Its shape was a classic example of the later Altirian period, a sort of arrow as the main body, with two smaller one attached to the sides. On the side the artificial gravity considered the “top”, there were building-like structures, resembling a city.
The whole thing looked like it was built for atmospheric flight, which was very much not the case, considering it was more than 800 meters long, and as such would probably fall apart under the forces applied. But it was definitely stylish, even if a little outdated, and still very practical.
There were worse ships to be stuck on for months for sure, and the crew was pretty nice too, barring the exception sitting in front of me. Of course, I was the one who needed to manage Commander Zedbi for the foreseeable future.
“I have come once again to make my complaints heard, Captain.”
“Commander, it’s much too late for me to go back on my decision, even if I wanted to. Complaining now will accomplish nothing except waste everyone’s time.”
“Well, perhaps you should have thought about that before limiting me to bringing only three servants on board. Someone of my status needs at least five, even in special circumstances.”
“Commander, this is a long-term mission. Anyone we bring will be a significant strain on our precious resources. I consider three servants to be more than sufficient for our officers.”
“Yes, I guess you wouldn’t understand who would need more personnel than your mother was ever able to afford. Then again, you only have one butler on a captain’s salary. Guess the Temidian blood runs strong in your family.”
“Enough, Commander. Go back to your post or this conversation will be reported to high command on our return.”
“You wouldn’t dare! They’ll know I’m right!”
Curiously for someone so sure of his righteousness, he still left the bridge, letting me concentrate on the maps of what was known on Terra space. The answer was resoundingly ‘not much’. But we could speculate on what systems would be the potentially juiciest to settle for them, considering what we knew.
I was busy planning the best potential routes for our operation, when the absolute darkness I could see through the glass bay suddenly filled with stars, and the main alarm began blasting.
“We left FTL”, screamed a Licam operating the propulsion system.
“I can see that,” I mumble. “Cut the alarm and send everyone to their combat position. Every officer on the bridge. We need to assess the situation.”
I was already thinking. We were five days of travel away from Earth. We had just encountered an FTL disruption field. What could that mean? Well first of all, the map the sensors were building around us didn’t detect any significant body or hostile vessels nearby, which meant… The disruption field filled a significant part of the system!
For what purpose? It was obvious: traversing it without distortion would take us months. It was a wall. I quickly went over the implications. A disruptor station had to be manned, or at least, maintained. That meant they needed ships travelling for months at sub light speed to resupply these stations! That was quite the commitment to prevent us entry. Fortunately, we could easily turn back to exit the field and go back home, which is exactly what I ordered.
Then, something impossible happened. A ship appeared on the radar, as if it had just exited a jump. But it had done so in the disruption field. Even worse, the gravitational wave detector spiked, like we were now almost right next to the disruptor.
I realized that it was the case: this ship could ignore the disruption field, and as such it had no problem having the disruptor on board.
We began blasting at it with our energy weaponry, to no avail. They were essentially teleporting after each time they fired, always being gone by the time our rays reached their position.
After of few minutes of that pointless exchange of fire, were our weapons never hit and theirs did barely any damage, twelve new signals appeared on the screen coming towards us at a terrifying speed. Missiles! No, the way they maneuvered to escape our point defenses ruled that out. Strike crafts…
The Terrans were hopelessly outmatched in firepower, and elven of the strike crafts were destroyed. But the last one managed to slam in the left “secondary hull”, destroying it almost entirely. We could survive without it, but I doubted that was all the Humans had in stock. We needed to get out now, but how? We were in the middle of a light-hour wide disruption field, that our enemy could somehow ignore! But that gave me an idea. If it didn’t work, we were dead anyway.
“Activate the disruptor!”
My subordinates didn’t understand why I would do that when the enemy was clearly immune to it, but they weren’t paid to think, and they knew it! (Those who were paid at all, that is.)
as soon as our own field reached the enemy ship, they became a lot less jumpy. I was right, they could jump in the field they generated, but ours could still pin them down!
“Fire a relativistic missile at them and cut the field so that they can jump a second before it hits them!”
If we destroyed the main craft, I had no doubt the strike crafts would avenge it. If they fled, however, we might have a chance. Of course, the most logical course of action for them would be to dodge and finish us of, but I hoped one second would be a short delay enough to overwrite rationality in the brains of our opponents.
And I was right. After a few hours, when the enormous disruption field had completely dissolved, our enemies still hadn’t returned, and we were able to escape.
If Commander Zebdi had not met his demise during the battle, (a tragedy that took me several seconds to recover from), he would have probably pointed out that that we should have destroyed the ship at the cost of our lives in the name of honor.
I, however, was certain that the intel we were bringing back would be a more devasting blow to humanity than the loss of any ship could be. The fact that it allowed us to remain alive was merely a pleasant side effect.

My girlfriend and I were together for two years, part of it was long distance. We were previously good friends for 5 years, then she was the one that caught feelings and pursued me first. During our relationship she always told me things like “I’m the one”, we talked about how we would get married and grow old together, she made so many promises that she was 100% sure of me and that she’d never leave. She would say things like “we’ve known each other in every lifetime”. We got together even though I was leaving for a masters study, she said she thought she’d never do long distance again but for me it was worth it, bc she was 100% sure I’m the guy she wants. I left a week after we got together, and I was gone for about a year. During that time we visited once a month, it was always great. I eventually moved back and we spent another year together in person. I’m sorry if this post is too long.
She ended things about a month ago. During the breakup she gave me very vague answers so I couldn’t get the closure I needed. I decided to reach out a week after the breakup to ask why she did it, and what she said killed me inside.
She said that she knew we were compatible and I’m an amazing person but felt like she was settling for me, and she didn’t want to live her life like that when she thinks she can find something better. She said she believes in that soulmate connection with one person when you know deep inside you that this is “it”, and she didn’t feel like that with me, she didn’t think I was “it”. But we did say to each other during the relationship that this was “it”, she told me so many times that I’m the one, so I don’t know how a flip just switched in her brain. She also said she realized she didn’t love me in the way “real love” is, and maybe she just loved the idea of me. She said she always felt the need to be accepted and loved by people and I made her feel like that. She said when you truly love someone you’d sacrifice things for them, and she wouldn’t sacrifice things for me. She said she was forcing herself to be comfortable around me, and it wasn’t the type of comfort that it should be with “the one”.
How the fuck does it take you two years to realize you don’t love someone in the way “real love” is? Especially after all the emotional intimacy we shared. How could you be uncomfortable with me? I was her first kiss, her first hand hold, she said she was saving those things for the right person and she did them with me. Why would she feel like shes settling for me when she’s the one that pursued me first? She went all out to “get me” and be in a relationship with me. Am I really the type of guy that gets settled for? That hurts like hell. She said she was having all these thoughts during the last 4 months of the relationship. But literally a month ago, I felt that she’s been a bit cold, and I asked if everything was okay. She said “nothings wrong, I’ve been really stressed with school/work. But nothings wrong with us, maybe something’s just wrong with me with all the stress. But we’re good, that doesn’t mean I don’t love you or that I’d ever give up on us, I’d never do that. Don’t worry I still love you and I’ll always be here.” She said that word for word. So she was lying to me? Why would you lie instead of communicating openly? If she had told me she was having those thoughts it would’ve been easier for me, but she gave me that reassurance and then blindsided me a month later. I told her it’s normal to lose feelings in a relationship after a while, that eventually that initial spark or honeymoon phase ends, and that’s when the real relationship starts and you work on building a life together. Love eventually becomes a choice and not just a feeling. But she said she wouldn’t lose feelings with the right person. Now I’m the wrong person when she literally told me a million times that we were always meant for each other. I told her I think she’ll end up being disappointed when she realizes there is no “one” person that gives you that magical feeling for life, you eventually reach a point where you have to choose that person everyday. Relationships are hard and most of them end up losing that initial spark, but it’s an opportunity for a new kind of love to blossom, a love based off commitment and loyalty to each other. That’s the only way a relationship can last forever. And during our relationship we even acknowledged that fact together and we told each other that if the feelings fade we will always choose each other no matter what happens. It makes no sense to me. And if she actually lost feelings and fell out of love, that’s fine. But to say she never loved me in the way “real love” is, that makes no sense to me and it’s killing me inside. Have I just been blind and stupid the entire relationship? How does it take TWO YEARS to realize that? She said to me, “maybe you can choose someone and settle for them and learn to love them, but I believe there’s one person out there that is meant for me and when I find them I will know it deep inside me.” Yea, I believed that too. I believed it because I thought it was you. Just because I chose you doesn’t mean I’m settling for you or learning to love you. I thought you were meant for me. It’s so ridiculous I don’t understand, she used to be so sure that I was the one, she knew it deep inside her that I was. And now she’s saying that when she finds it, she’ll know. Well you knew it with me and now you don’t.
Part of me understands why she lost feelings, we didn’t really have a strong base. We were together for only a week before I left for a year. I feel like it wasn’t enough time for the physical attraction to build up and to get to know each other in person. By the time we visited each other, a lot of time had passed and the spark wasn’t the same as the beginning, it was kinda awkward at first. We got into a serious committed relationship talking about future marriage, before we ever hugged each other. She was scared to kiss me, maybe that’s why she said she was forcing herself to be comfortable. But eventually we kissed and it was great. During the visits it felt like everything was going great and that our relationship was getting stronger. I didn’t think that she was uncomfortable. I feel like if we had done all the intimate things in the beginning, we would have a base to build off of and the spark would be alive.
Also I keep blaming myself and wondering what I did wrong. I’m just certain that it’s my fault, that I made her lose attraction. Maybe I wasn’t manly enough or attractive enough. Maybe I was too boring or uninteresting or too “stable”. Being in love with someone basically means you have to be sexually attracted to them first, that’s what separates family love from romantic love. Maybe I didn’t do enough to keep her attracted to me, so she felt like she lost feelings. It was really hard with the distance. I tried, I really tried. I would always flirt and tease her, I tried not to let the relationship feel like it was a platonic friendship over time. I was always confident and “manly” with her, I stood my ground when she did things I didn’t like, I wasn’t needy. We sexted and video called all the time. I always planned amazing dates. I tried to keep the fun alive. I don’t know what else I could’ve done to keep her attracted. I truly feel like if we had been in person the whole time, it would’ve worked and she would’ve still been attracted to me. It’s just different when you’re there physically. But we both knew this, we acknowledged that it was gonna be hard and the feelings may fade, but we said we’d always choose each other no matter what. Maybe it was inevitable with the distance, but at the end she said it wasn’t because of the distance, she believes with the right person the distance wouldn’t matter. So I just wasn’t the right person for her, I was for a while, but I let her lose attraction for me. Your view on love and attraction may differ, but I learned that it’s the guy’s responsibility to keep a woman attracted, it’s about how he acts and behaves that keeps her attracted. So it’s my fault she lost attraction, it’s something I did. For example when I look back at the first visit, a mistake I made was asking to kiss her instead of just going for it. She said no, maybe because I came off as unconfident and that turned her off. I was so nervous during the first visit because there was so much expectation built up inside my head. Maybe that prevented me from being able to genuinely enjoy myself around her and attract her. Eventually though, we got comfortable with each other and we kissed and it was great. I felt the spark was there. I don’t think she met someone else, I asked her and she said no. Yea maybe she could’ve lied, but i know her and I don’t think she would do that. She said “you know me, I would never allow myself to do that while I’m in a relationship. The reasons are solely because I don’t feel in love with you anymore.”
We hit a little rut near the end because we were both very busy, but I didn’t think it was concerning because she always gave reassurance and made it seem like everything is fine. It feels like shit hearing that someone was settling for me. Why wasn’t I enough? I keep looking back and thinking what I could’ve done different to keep her attracted. I keep nitpicking at myself and feeling insecure about the way I am. She was so sure of me in the beginning so I must’ve done something along the way to make her lose feelings. She let me tear my walls down and trust her fully, then she left. It feels like I’m not worthy of love because she saw something in me and decided she didn’t want me. What hurts the most is that to me, she was “it”, to me she was the one. And she said that to me too and I believed her. I felt that she truly meant it when she said that. She would tell me she was always attracted to me and had feelings during our friendship but she “locked them in a box” because she was too afraid. She even told me that I was a walking green flag and that I was perfect and I did nothing wrong. It hurts to know she thinks that yet she still decided she didn’t want me. It kills to know that one day she’ll get married, he’ll get to hold her and kiss her and have a family, and it won’t be with me. I can’t stand the thought of her being intimate with someone else. And it’s the thought that, whoever she ends up with, will be better than me in a way. She will love him more than she loved me. He will make her feel what I couldn’t make her feel. And I’m blaming myself so much that I couldn’t make her feel like that anymore. I’m grieving the future that we both planned together. I feel so betrayed, I feel like shit. Most of all I just really miss her, we knew each other for 7 years and now we’re just strangers again.
I’ve been hurt before, I’ve had a few breakups, but this one hurts the most. I don’t know what it is about this girl that makes me feel like I’ll never find anyone better. I know that time heals everything but I feel like this has damaged me on a deep level, I feel like I can’t let my walls down again. I don’t want to love again and risk getting hurt. I can’t invest myself fully into someone if I’m always afraid they’re going to blindside me. I know a breakup shouldn’t define your self worth, but it’s just the idea that the person I loved doesn’t see herself spending her life with me anymore, that makes me feel really bad. It’s the thought that she saw something in me that made her decide she doesn’t love me. She analyzed our relationship and thought “I want someone better”. The thought that it’s my fault, that it’s something I did. I didn’t have enough “game”. I couldn’t keep her attraction high. I can’t stand the idea of her getting married one day and finding her “it”. Of course I want her to be happy but I’d be lying if I said that doesn’t kill me inside.
Nobody is perfect but she was close to it. She’s such a rare breed, she had everything I wanted in a woman and it’s so hard to come by. I wish I had a reason to hate her but she’s genuinely an amazing person. She did nothing bad to me, we barely fought and when we did it was very gentle. Our entire relationship was pretty much perfect up until the end. I’ve never been with someone that was this compatible with me. She’s the kindest human, she’s intelligent, she’s very mature, she’s beautiful inside and out, she’s very warm and gentle. And the fact that she’s such a sweet and genuine person makes it way harder. If she had cheated or something I think this would’ve been easier on me, because I’d see her as a bad person. But she’s not a bad person. It hurts way more knowing that she was feeling like she wanted to end things, but at the same time she was trying to convince herself to love me, because she didn’t want to hurt me. She didn’t want to break her promises, she was trying so hard not to, but in the end she couldn’t lie to herself anymore. Why do I have to feel like someone has to convince themselves to love me? Why does someone have to force themselves to believe I’m the one? Why can’t anyone ever just truly believe it with their entire soul, that they want to be with me. When I asked for reassurance and she told me she still loved me and would never give up, she was trying to convince herself because she didn’t want to hurt me. It was all lies. Every “I love you” in the last 4 months was a lie. I feel like such an idiot that I was sitting there for the past 4 months thinking that everything was going great. She was just faking her affection the whole time. Imagine hearing that someone was forcing themselves to love you. No one was forcing you! The exit door has always been open, no one forced her to stay, no one forced her to pursue me in the first place. I told her many times that I just want truth and transparency in our relationship, yet she hid all of those things. She said she hid them because she cared about me and didn’t want to hurt me, and she was trying to make it work. But if she truly cared for me, she would know that I deserve honesty, I deserve to know the truth even if it hurts. I don’t deserve to live in a lie. If she cared for me she would let me go find someone who truly loves me, instead of just pretending to love me. By lying, she was only caring about herself, to relieve herself of the guilt. The breakup would’ve been way smoother if she just told the truth from the start, but now I feel like an idiot who sat there for 4 months thinking that everything was going well, when in reality it wasn’t.
There’s so many things I loved about her. I loved the way she cries during every movie, she thinks she’s too sensitive but I think it’s beautiful to feel your emotions that deeply. I loved the way her face lights up when she smiles. I loved how she would call me just to tell me silly little things about her day. I loved her curiosity and wonder for the universe. I loved how she would run into my arms when she saw me. She just understood me, and I understood her. I can’t hate her, I wish I could, but I just love her with all my heart. I don’t think I’ll ever stop. Even when 20 years pass and I’m over this and we’re both married to other people, I will still love her and wish the best for her. I miss her so much, I miss talking to her. I know we can't be friends, but I really wish I could still have her in my life. But I shouldn't wish that I guess, because she decided she wants to live her life without me in it. I can’t believe she could decide to lose me forever when she always said she could never live without me.
The worst part is, I reacted to the break up very emotionally. I showed how hurt I was, I wrote a long paragraph, and I brought up all the promises she made. That was a mistake, it probably killed any ounce of attraction she had left. If there was any chance of her coming back or realizing it was a mistake, I destroyed that chance. I made it look like I can’t live without her. I didn’t beg for her back at all, but I kept pushing for answers and explanations. I asked her what I did wrong and stuff, and that made me look super desperate. I should’ve just accepted the break up immediately and cut off all communication. Maybe then she would’ve thought about it, she would wonder why I wasn’t upset and have second thoughts about her decision. It would make me look more attractive in her eyes. But no I ruined it forever. Now all I want to do is salvage some respect, to make her see me as a valuable person. Not as someone who can’t live without her. Deep down I really want her to have a change of heart, I want her to feel re-attracted somehow, after having some time and space away from the situation. But I ruined her image of me. Now I’m looking back and analyzing every little thing about our relationship and wondering what I should’ve done better. I realized I made a lot of mistakes, which at the time I didn’t think were mistakes, but now looking back it’s probably my fault she lost attraction. I didn’t do enough.
I told myself during the relationship that “everything is temporary, don’t get too attached, life can change at any moment”. I know those things because I’ve learned my lessons from the past, but this is still killing me. I know almost everyone has been heartbroken, I’m nothing special, every human has been through this before. I just need to hear that it wasn’t my fault or that I’ll find someone better eventually. I’m blaming myself a lot right now and I keep thinking that she wouldn’t have left if I had been attractive enough. I generally consider myself a confident person but this has set me back a lot, it’s ruining my self esteem. Maybe I have attachment issues that I need to work on. I know that time will heal this, but right now I can’t imagine myself finding someone that’s better. I feel like the idea of “the one” has been ruined for me. I want to believe it, but I don’t think I do anymore. Even if I find another person who I think is the one, there’s always the possibility that they will change their mind. There’s always a chance that all of their words and actions were just lies. A lot of people get into relationships because they love the idea of being in love, not because they are actually in love with the person.
Thank you for reading this far, I know it’s a long post. I needed somewhere to vent, I don’t have many people to talk to. When I cry, I cry alone. And during the act of crying I start to hate myself for being such a bitch. I know it’s perfectly okay to cry and feel your emotions but it’s hard to escape the conditioning that I’m used to. I have friends and family but, I can’t express my emotions the way I did in this post. People have their own lives and worries and they don’t want to deal with someone’s silly heartbreak I guess.
TL;DR - my gf and I broke up a month ago, she said she was settling for me and that I wasn’t the “one”, even though she made promises and assured me that she wouldn’t leave. I keep blaming myself and wondering what I did wrong.