My (ex)fiancé and I had been together for almost 6.5 years, engaged for almost 2.5. Over the last several months, my (ex)fiancé has sat me down to talk about our relationship about once a month. Before these conversations, he would shut down and barely speak to me for several days even when I would ask what was wrong. Then he would finally tell me he was ready to have a conversation and would express his frustrations with the relationship. By the time of our conversations, I would already be on the defensive from his recent behavior. I also generally do not receive feedback well. When he would try to tell me that he was unhappy in our relationship because I didn't compliment him enough, flirt with him enough, or tell him I loved him enough, I would shut down. I was not able to hear what he was really trying to tell me. Instead, I put up a wall and told him to love me for who I am. I basically asked him "If I'm happy in our relationship despite my frustrations, why can't you be?" I now realize that is not an appropriate or healthy response when your partner is trying to communicate with you.
I did try to hear him. I gifted him some lingerie for the first time and let him take a boudoir photo shoot of me wearing it. I started sending a few more cute messages. I tried to make more time to cuddle with him when he would ask. I tried to give him more hugs. I tried to thank him more for picking up around the house. I wrote him a cute letter and surprised him with a few gifts for Easter. However, about a month ago, we had another one of those conversations. Except this time the first things he brought up were 'wondering what else is out there' and talking about how other girls are always complimenting him. Again came the walls and extra defensiveness. I ended up writing him a letter talking about how I didn't know if I could ever be what he wanted me to be and that maybe he should think about calling things off. This was obviously a defense mechanism to try to beat him to the punch line and talk about a self-fulfilling prophecy. Three weeks later he would sit me down and tell me he wanted to know what else was out there again and that he didn't know if he could go through with marrying me. My efforts did not feel like enough for him and I understand why. I was having a hard time connecting my emotions with my actions which made my actions seem reactionary and not genuine or provoked by love.
I have been through a lot more trauma in my life than I realized. My dad was in the Navy while I was growing up. We had to move every three years. A very pivotal point in my life was when we moved when I was in the 6th grade. I lived right next door to my best friend. I was finding my love for math and theater. I also played soccer and was a Girl Scout. When we moved, I became very depressed, though I didn't understand that's what it was at the time. I stopped all of my extracurricular activities. I stopped getting too close to people because I knew I would have to move or they would have to move eventually. I mostly stayed in my room and kept to myself, even from my family. I also have struggled with anxiety for as long as I can remember. Then, in my senior year of high school, I got my first-ever boyfriend. We were in a relationship for over 4 years. In that relationship, I would always be the one to try to talk about our problems. I would be the one who would always want longer hugs and more cuddles. But it was not a healthy relationship. We broke up and got back together many times. I found several illicit texts to other girls on multiple occasions and he would always gaslight me by saying his younger brother stole his phone or I misinterpreted the messages. I think this caused me not to want to show my emotions because it wasn't reciprocated and resulted in heartache. Then, three years ago my younger brother died in a tragic car accident at the age of 17.
When I realized I could lose the love of my life, I realized that he was right about me not being affectionate enough. I had built up walls to protect myself. I thought I had made progress on my anxiety and depression, but I realized I was wrong. I also realized that I have issues with communication, trust, and vulnerability. I was a great partner in other ways and I did express my love in other ways. I moved across the country, coast to coast, with him to a state where I didn't know anyone so that he could attend his dream school. I take care of the household. I get the majority of the groceries. I do all of the cooking. I do all of the maintenance cleaning. I take care of our 2 cats and 1 dog. I say all of those in the present tense because we currently still live together but are sleeping in separate rooms. I also financially supported him by lending him money and letting him pay less of the rent because I made more money. I accept all of him including that he has terrible time management skills, he can have a hard time controlling his emotions at times, and he is disorganized and messy. I also accepted that I would have to wait for marriage and children because of his school and accepted that he did not have a lot of free time between school, work, and his hobbies. I supported his love for his hobbies by accepting his purchasing of expensive equipment even when he owed me money, traveling to watch several events that were important to him, and traveling to see him win an award from his job. I would write heartfelt cards for every holiday. I also bought him dozens of children's books about love that I wanted us to read to our children one day.
When I realized I could lose him, I felt something change inside me. It was like I could feel a hole being blown in the wall I had built up. I felt all my love for him overwhelm me. I couldn't hug him, kiss him, or tell him I love him enough. I tried to talk to him to apologize for my behavior and how badly I'd hurt him. I tried to explain how I felt like a different person and how I really wanted to work hard on improving myself as a partner to make our relationship work. I tried to prove my words with actions. I wrote a list of things I needed to work on including communication and being more affectionate. I also wrote out a list of ways to work on those things and actually started doing the things on the list. Some of the items I had already begun to do like hug and kiss him more and tell him I love him more. I also tried to ask more questions about his interests/hobbies/day. I was more vulnerable and talked with him about my feelings more. I even initiated intimacy, something I had really only done once in a blue moon when I was intoxicated.
Despite all of my efforts, over the next two weeks, he continued to say he did not know if he could be with me and wanted to know what else was out there. He was very wavering and said multiple times "I don't know what the right decision is." He said he could not trust that my changes would last and that it was probably too late. I begged him to try couples therapy, but he refused and said "Therapy takes too long" and basically said it wasn't worth the time. He finally broke up with me after 2 weeks of going back and forth and I was devastated. He later talked to a mutual friend of ours and changed his mind about therapy. I was so happy to hear that he had changed his mind. However, now I feel like I can't even trust him anymore. He's turning into a person I don't recognize and I don't know what he's capable of anymore. I don't know if the man I love still exists. When he told me he was now agreeable to try therapy he said "We're still broken up, but I won't talk to any other girls." and then promptly said "And it will give me more time to find a place to live if things don't work out." He deleted several Instagram posts that had photos of me after he agreed to try therapy which makes me think he's not actually that open to healing our relationship. He complained to me about how he might have to take out student loans after I told him he needed to pay me for half of the rent while we're broken up and not decreased rate he had been paying me. He also "checked on me" on the night of the 3rd year anniversary of my brother's death when he heard me crying. Then he just sat on the end of the bed scrolling his phone while I cried as if he was checking on me because he felt like he had to and not because he wanted to. When I asked him if he had some sort of deadline in mind for the therapy, because he had previously mentioned that it takes too long, he said July or August and I have a suspicion that is because a girl he likes is leaving for summer break but will be back at the end of August for the next semester.
I just feel like the way he has been acting is not how you act towards someone you were in a relationship with for almost 6.5 years. Especially after saying you still love them and have no negative feelings towards them. That means even though you don't think you are a good relationship match, you should still want to treat them with respect. You should care that they are hurting during this time. You should want to comfort them in their grief of a separate event. You should mean it if you say you want to try therapy.
TL; DR : Do you think therapy will help?

Facts:

• 30 states have a higher minimum wage than Tennessee's $7.25.
• Tennessee last raised its minimum wage in 2009.
• Since then, inflation has risen by about 36.6%.
• A decent living wage for a single adult in Tennessee is about $13.25 per hour.

Steps to Raise the Minimum Wage

Step 1: Organize a Petition Drive

Form a Nonpartisan Group:

• Create or join a group focused solely on raising the minimum wage, without political affiliations.
• Use platforms like Zoom for virtual meetings. Schedule regular meetings and create a structured agenda. Use social media and local forums to recruit members.

Research Requirements:

• Signature Requirement: For statewide initiatives, the number of signatures required is significant and typically a percentage of the votes cast in the last gubernatorial election. The exact number can be confirmed with the Tennessee Secretary of State's office.
  • Phone: (615) 741-2819
• For local initiatives, like in Knoxville, a charter amendment can be proposed if at least one registered voter files the petition with the county election commission for pre-approval (TCA 2-5-151).

Create the Petition:

• Draft a clear and concise petition for a minimum wage increase. Here is a sample:

Draft Petition:
Petition for Increasing the Minimum Wage in Tennessee
To the Tennessee General Assembly:
We, the undersigned residents of Tennessee, believe that the current minimum wage of $7.25 per hour is insufficient to meet the basic needs of individuals and families in our state. Given the significant rise in living costs and inflation since the last adjustment in 2009, we urgently call for an increase in the state minimum wage to a livable wage of $13.25 per hour. This adjustment will ensure that all working Tennesseans can afford necessities such as housing, food, healthcare, and transportation.
By signing this petition, we express our support for this necessary change and urge the Tennessee General Assembly to take immediate action.
Name Address Signature

Step 2: Collect Signatures

• Host Community Events: Organize events like town hall meetings, local fairs, or farmers' markets to gather signatures.
• Utilize Local Networks: Leverage small-town connections where everyone knows each other to spread the word and gather support.
• Set Up Booths: Place booths in high-traffic areas like grocery stores, libraries, and community centers to collect signatures.
• Door-to-Door Campaigning: Go door-to-door in your neighborhood to ask for signatures.

Step 3: Raise Awareness

• Social Media Campaign: Use platforms like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram to inform the community and encourage them to sign the petition.
• Local Media: Reach out to local newspapers, radio stations, and TV channels to cover your campaign.
• Flyers and Posters: Distribute flyers and put up posters in local businesses and public spaces.

Step 4: Submit the Petition

• Verify Signatures: Ensure all collected signatures meet the requirements.
• Submit to Authorities: Submit the petition to the appropriate state or local authority for validation.

Deadlines and Requirements

• Submission Deadline: Typically, signatures must be submitted several months before the general election to allow time for verification. For 2024, check with the Tennessee Secretary of State for specific deadlines and the number of required signatures (Ballotpedia) (Tennessee Secretary of State).

Key Points:

• Local Efforts: It is more challenging to change the minimum wage at a local level like Knoxville due to state preemption laws, but local advocacy can still be influential.
• Statewide Efforts: For statewide initiatives, a significant number of signatures is required based on the last gubernatorial election.

By following these steps and working together, we can push for a living wage in Tennessee to ensure a better quality of life for all. For more detailed information on signature requirements and deadlines, you can visit Ballotpedia or the Tennessee Secretary of State's website.

Other Ways to Advocate for a Higher State Minimum Wage:

1. Legislative Advocacy:
   • Lobby Lawmakers: Work with advocacy groups to meet with state legislators and push for a bill to increase the minimum wage.
   • Public Campaigns: Use media campaigns, public rallies, and social media to raise awareness and put pressure on lawmakers.
   • Coalition Building: Form alliances with labor unions, community organizations, and businesses that support higher wages.
2. Electoral Strategy:
   • Support Pro-Wage Increase Candidates: Work to elect state legislators who support raising the minimum wage.
   • Voter Education: Educate voters about candidates' positions on the minimum wage and encourage them to vote accordingly.
3. Public Pressure:
   • Media Engagement: Write op-eds, participate in interviews, and use social media to highlight the need for a wage increase.
   • Petitions and Letters: Organize letter-writing campaigns and online petitions to demonstrate public support.
4. Local Government Initiatives:
   • City and County Ordinances: While state law may preempt local minimum wage increases, some municipalities might still be able to implement higher wages for city or county employees or through specific local initiatives.
5. Business Initiatives:
   • Encourage Voluntary Increases: Encourage businesses to voluntarily raise wages and create public recognition programs for those that do.
   • Partnerships with Businesses: Work with businesses to demonstrate the benefits of higher wages, such as reduced turnover and increased productivity.
6. Legal and Policy Research:
   • Economic Studies: Commission or conduct studies that show the positive impacts of a higher minimum wage on the economy and present these findings to policymakers and the public.
   • Policy Proposals: Develop detailed policy proposals outlining how a wage increase can be implemented and funded.

Steps to Take Right Now:

• Form or Join an Advocacy Group: Find like-minded individuals and organizations to build a coalition.
• Contact State Legislators: Start a dialogue with state representatives and senators to gauge their support and educate them on the issue.
• Engage the Public: Use social media, community meetings, and local media to build broad public support.
• Prepare for Long-Term Efforts: Understand that changing the minimum wage may take time and sustained effort.

By using these strategies, we can create a multifaceted approach to advocate for a higher minimum wage in Tennessee.

[US-GA] Duplex neighbor causing a bunch of problems and just recieved a mildly threatening letter from them.
So, let's start with the basics. I've been living in this place for almost 3 years now. Prior to living here I rented from the same landlord in a nearby duplex in 2014. My neighbor is a man and his wife. They've been living there together for about 6 years with the man living there for nearly 15. We've remained cordial to this point regardless of the issues that have popped up. At least, that was the case up until recently. We share a front porch that has railing around the ledge and splitting the unit down the middle at the living room.
So, the issues(these aren't listed in any particular order).
First, Over the last 2 or so years they've taken in roughly 7 stray cats. They keep the majority of these cats outside at all times. This wasnt an issue initially as I didn't mind the little fluffballs on the porch but as times gone on it has become an inconvenience. The cats will shit on my porch and walkway leading from the porch to the gravel driveway where I park. I have stepped in cat shit no less than 4 times in the past 2 months. When I moved in I had a welcome mat at the door. Well , after the cats shit on it 4 times in one week and I couldn't get the shit off it the last time so I threw it out. I bought a hose and spray nozzle just to spray cat shit off my porch and shoes. I have tried non-toxic sprays to try and coax them away from my walkway and that hasn't worked. I have spoken directly with both the man and his wife on this topic and all I receive is gaslighting. They claim it's not cat shit, it's actually chicken, raccoon, and opossum shit. Also, these cats are not healthy. They do not look healthy, the majority of cat shit I step in is diarrhea, and their fur is in such poor shape.
Second, roaches. When I first moved in there were roaches. I contacted the landlord and he had pest control out. I also placed multiple different traps at the same time and they died down a bit. The kicker here is I asked the neighbor about the roaches and his response was, and I shit you not, "oh the woman in the other duplex(between 500-1000 feet away from current duplex) was dirty and when she moved out the roaches moved over here." that was roughly 1.5 years ago and the roaches come and go now. I place new traps every few months to try and cull the population as much as possible. I just believe that the neighbors are dirty as all hell as their porch is a mess and I wouldn't doubt the inside is just as bad or worse. Oh, and to top that off, they leave their cat food open on the porch. So, roaches, raccoons(which I've seen eating from the cat plate at night), and opossums all get their fill.
Third, and trigger warning in advance, domestic violence. I'll admit going into that I am ashamed of what I'm going to state here. The man beats his wife. I have heard them fighting on so many occasions. There was one day where I had gotten off work and started to chill and unwind preparing to go to sleep on the recliner in the living room. I heard them start fighting as they normally do. Well, this particular time they brought it out onto the porch. All I heard out my window was things breaking and multiple banging noises. Then just absolute screaming. She was screaming as if she were being murdered. Then there was silence and I heard him say " if you ever talk back to me like that again I will kill you." this is where I am ashamed. I should've called the cops. I didn't. The dude owns a gun, is an alcoholic, and is definitely unhinged enough to retaliate if I were to try and help. I am afraid that there would be retaliatory violence and it is an uncomfortable feeling that I should not feel in my own home.
Fourth, my girlfriend refuses to come over to my house anymore due to the sad looking cats/cat shit, the occasional roach that she sees, and her not wanting to be at my home alone at night(I work nights) knowing how unhinged the neighbor is. She has heard him beating his wife. She is afraid because "what am I supposed to do if he gets really drunk while you're at work and tries to come into the house."
There are a couple smaller things but this is the gist of the major issues.
So, about a year ago I messaged the LL about the cats shitting everywhere. About a week or so later there was cat litter alongside my backyard fence. I wasn't seeing cat shit everywhere anymore so I let it go.
We arrive now at last week. Got home from a long night of work, kicked my shoes off, and relaxed. Woke up for work later and started to throw my shoes on just to notice that there was cat shit on them that I had already tracked through to living room.
I was pissed and messaged the landlord "Neighbors let their cats back out again and they are shitting everywhere. Theyve already ruined the mat that was in front of the door when I moved in. There are shit stains all over the porch. I don't want to call animal control cause I doubt they'll do anything but I'm getting tired of having to either clean my shoes or dodge shit everytime I get home from work."
He didn't reply, which I expected as he rarely replies.
A couple days later I get home from work to see a note left in my door. The neighbors wife was pissed. I don't have the note on me right now so I'm going to summarize.
She claimed that the cats do not shit on my side of the house. They shit near their cars "because that's where they are used to shitting" she said that all the shit I'm claiming to be cat shit is chicken, opossum, and raccoon shit. She threatened me with this line "you told the landlord the lie about the cats trying to get us evicted so why shouldn't we tell the landlord that the house smells like weed." yes, my roommate and I smoke. Yes, it's an illegal state. She then goes on to claim "the smoke comes through our oven vent and dryer vent and my clothes reek of weed." I call bullshit because not even my clothes smell like weed. This is legitimately the only complaint I've ever heard them say about my living there. Throughout the letter she claims multiple times that I'm not seeing what I think I'm seeing and I'm just trying to get them evicted.
So, this is where I stand, all I can think of is get photographic evidence of the cats shitting, but I don't really know what it's going to accomplish. The cats definitely need to be taken care of better and them shitting everywhere is not cool either. The other issues I've noted should probably be dealt with as well but domestic violence is a tricky thing to involve myself in. My Gf is mad because I haven't called the cops but I legit don't want to be shot or be evicted/arrested because I smoke weed in my home.
Afterthought: there has been a few instances of the woman being on something, not sure what, and just being a zombie on the porch. I'm playing games and see a figure on the porch. I look out there and there she stands, facing the road, arms and head down, just trying to keep her balance. That was uncomfortable to see to say the least.

My (ex)fiancé and I had been together for almost 6.5 years, engaged for almost 2.5. Over the last several months, my (ex)fiancé has sat me down to talk about our relationship about once a month. Before these conversations, he would shut down and barely speak to me for several days even when I would ask what was wrong. Then he would finally tell me he was ready to have a conversation and would express his frustrations with the relationship. By the time of our conversations, I would already be on the defensive from his recent behavior. I also generally do not receive feedback well. When he would try to tell me that he was unhappy in our relationship because I didn't compliment him enough, flirt with him enough, or tell him I loved him enough, I would shut down. I was not able to hear what he was really trying to tell me. Instead, I put up a wall and told him to love me for who I am. I basically asked him "If I'm happy in our relationship despite my frustrations, why can't you be?" I now realize that is not an appropriate or healthy response when your partner is trying to communicate with you.
I did try to hear him. I gifted him some lingerie for the first time and let him take a boudoir photo shoot of me wearing it. I started sending a few more cute messages. I tried to make more time to cuddle with him when he would ask. I tried to give him more hugs. I tried to thank him more for picking up around the house. I wrote him a cute letter and surprised him with a few gifts for Easter. However, about a month ago, we had another one of those conversations. Except this time the first things he brought up were 'wondering what else is out there' and talking about how other girls are always complimenting him. Again came the walls and extra defensiveness. I ended up writing him a letter talking about how I didn't know if I could ever be what he wanted me to be and that maybe he should think about calling things off. This was obviously a defense mechanism to try to beat him to the punch line and talk about a self-fulfilling prophecy. Three weeks later he would sit me down and tell me he wanted to know what else was out there again and that he didn't know if he could go through with marrying me. My efforts did not feel like enough for him and I understand why. I was having a hard time connecting my emotions with my actions which made my actions seem reactionary and not genuine or provoked by love.
I have been through a lot more trauma in my life than I realized. My dad was in the Navy while I was growing up. We had to move every three years. A very pivotal point in my life was when we moved when I was in the 6th grade. I lived right next door to my best friend. I was finding my love for math and theater. I also played soccer and was a Girl Scout. When we moved, I became very depressed, though I didn't understand that's what it was at the time. I stopped all of my extracurricular activities. I stopped getting too close to people because I knew I would have to move or they would have to move eventually. I mostly stayed in my room and kept to myself, even from my family. I also have struggled with anxiety for as long as I can remember. Then, in my senior year of high school, I got my first-ever boyfriend. We were in a relationship for over 4 years. In that relationship, I would always be the one to try to talk about our problems. I would be the one who would always want longer hugs and more cuddles. But it was not a healthy relationship. We broke up and got back together many times. I found several illicit texts to other girls on multiple occasions and he would always gaslight me by saying his younger brother stole his phone or I misinterpreted the messages. I think this caused me not to want to show my emotions because it wasn't reciprocated and resulted in heartache. Then, three years ago my younger brother died in a tragic car accident at the age of 17.
When I realized I could lose the love of my life, I realized that he was right about me not being affectionate enough. I had built up walls to protect myself. I thought I had made progress on my anxiety and depression, but I realized I was wrong. I also realized that I have issues with communication, trust, and vulnerability. I was a great partner in other ways and I did express my love in other ways. I moved across the country, coast to coast, with him to a state where I didn't know anyone so that he could attend his dream school. I take care of the household. I get the majority of the groceries. I do all of the cooking. I do all of the maintenance cleaning. I take care of our 2 cats and 1 dog. I say all of those in the present tense because we currently still live together but are sleeping in separate rooms. I also financially supported him by lending him money and letting him pay less of the rent because I made more money. I accept all of him including that he has terrible time management skills, he can have a hard time controlling his emotions at times, and he is disorganized and messy. I also accepted that I would have to wait for marriage and children because of his school and accepted that he did not have a lot of free time between school, work, and his hobbies. I supported his love for his hobbies by accepting his purchasing of expensive equipment even when he owed me money, traveling to watch several events that were important to him, and traveling to see him win an award from his job. I would write heartfelt cards for every holiday. I also bought him dozens of children's books about love that I wanted us to read to our children one day.
When I realized I could lose him, I felt something change inside me. It was like I could feel a hole being blown in the wall I had built up. I felt all my love for him overwhelm me. I couldn't hug him, kiss him, or tell him I love him enough. I tried to talk to him to apologize for my behavior and how badly I'd hurt him. I tried to explain how I felt like a different person and how I really wanted to work hard on improving myself as a partner to make our relationship work. I tried to prove my words with actions. I wrote a list of things I needed to work on including communication and being more affectionate. I also wrote out a list of ways to work on those things and actually started doing the things on the list. Some of the items I had already begun to do like hug and kiss him more and tell him I love him more. I also tried to ask more questions about his interests/hobbies/day. I was more vulnerable and talked with him about my feelings more. I even initiated intimacy, something I had really only done once in a blue moon when I was intoxicated.
Despite all of my efforts, over the next two weeks, he continued to say he did not know if he could be with me and wanted to know what else was out there. He was very wavering and said multiple times "I don't know what the right decision is." He said he could not trust that my changes would last and that it was probably too late. I begged him to try couples therapy, but he refused and said "Therapy takes too long" and basically said it wasn't worth the time. He finally broke up with me after 2 weeks of going back and forth and I was devastated. He later talked to a mutual friend of ours and changed his mind about therapy. I was so happy to hear that he had changed his mind. However, now I feel like I can't even trust him anymore. He's turning into a person I don't recognize and I don't know what he's capable of anymore. I don't know if the man I love still exists. When he told me he was now agreeable to try therapy he said "We're still broken up, but I won't talk to any other girls." and then promptly said "And it will give me more time to find a place to live if things don't work out." He deleted several Instagram posts that had photos of me after he agreed to try therapy which makes me think he's not actually that open to healing our relationship. He complained to me about how he might have to take out student loans after I told him he needed to pay me for half of the rent while we're broken up and not decreased rate he had been paying me. He also "checked on me" on the night of the 3rd year anniversary of my brother's death when he heard me crying. Then he just sat on the end of the bed scrolling his phone while I cried as if he was checking on me because he felt like he had to and not because he wanted to. When I asked him if he had some sort of deadline in mind for the therapy, because he had previously mentioned that it takes too long, he said July or August and I have a suspicion that is because a girl he likes is leaving for summer break but will be back at the end of August for the next semester.
I just feel like the way he has been acting is not how you act towards someone you were in a relationship with for almost 6.5 years. Especially after saying you still love them and have no negative feelings towards them. That means even though you don't think you are a good relationship match, you should still want to treat them with respect. You should care that they are hurting during this time. You should want to comfort them in their grief of a separate event. You should mean it if you say you want to try therapy.
TL;DR : So should I break up with my ex-fiancé or should I keep fighting to get back the man I love?

Duplex neighbor causing a bunch of problems and just recieved a mildly threatening letter from them.
So, let's start with the basics. I've been living in this place for almost 3 years now. Prior to living here I rented from the same landlord in a nearby duplex in 2014. My neighbor is a man and his wife. They've been living there together for about 6 years with the man living there for nearly 15. We've remained cordial to this point regardless of the issues that have popped up. At least, that was the case up until recently. We share a front porch that has railing around the ledge and splitting the unit down the middle at the living room.
So, the issues(these aren't listed in any particular order).
First, Over the last 2 or so years they've taken in roughly 7 stray cats. They keep the majority of these cats outside at all times. This wasnt an issue initially as I didn't mind the little fluffballs on the porch but as times gone on it has become an inconvenience. The cats will shit on my porch and walkway leading from the porch to the gravel driveway where I park. I have stepped in cat shit no less than 4 times in the past 2 months. When I moved in I had a welcome mat at the door. Well , after the cats shit on it 4 times in one week and I couldn't get the shit off it the last time so I threw it out. I bought a hose and spray nozzle just to spray cat shit off my porch and shoes. I have tried non-toxic sprays to try and coax them away from my walkway and that hasn't worked. I have spoken directly with both the man and his wife on this topic and all I receive is gaslighting. They claim it's not cat shit, it's actually chicken, raccoon, and opossum shit. Also, these cats are not healthy. They do not look healthy, the majority of cat shit I step in is diarrhea, and their fur is in such poor shape.
Second, roaches. When I first moved in there were roaches. I contacted the landlord and he had pest control out. I also placed multiple different traps at the same time and they died down a bit. The kicker here is I asked the neighbor about the roaches and his response was, and I shit you not, "oh the woman in the other duplex(between 500-1000 feet away from current duplex) was dirty and when she moved out the roaches moved over here." that was roughly 1.5 years ago and the roaches come and go now. I place new traps every few months to try and cull the population as much as possible. I just believe that the neighbors are dirty as all hell as their porch is a mess and I wouldn't doubt the inside is just as bad or worse. Oh, and to top that off, they leave their cat food open on the porch. So, roaches, raccoons(which I've seen eating from the cat plate at night), and opossums all get their fill.
Third, and trigger warning in advance, domestic violence. I'll admit going into that I am ashamed of what I'm going to state here. The man beats his wife. I have heard them fighting on so many occasions. There was one day where I had gotten off work and started to chill and unwind preparing to go to sleep on the recliner in the living room. I heard them start fighting as they normally do. Well, this particular time they brought it out onto the porch. All I heard out my window was things breaking and multiple banging noises. Then just absolute screaming. She was screaming as if she were being murdered. Then there was silence and I heard him say " if you ever talk back to me like that again I will kill you." this is where I am ashamed. I should've called the cops. I didn't. The dude owns a gun, is an alcoholic, and is definitely unhinged enough to retaliate if I were to try and help. I am afraid that there would be retaliatory violence and it is an uncomfortable feeling that I should not feel in my own home.
Fourth, my girlfriend refuses to come over to my house anymore due to the sad looking cats/cat shit, the occasional roach that she sees, and her not wanting to be at my home alone at night(I work nights) knowing how unhinged the neighbor is. She has heard him beating his wife. She is afraid because "what am I supposed to do if he gets really drunk while you're at work and tries to come into the house."
There are a couple smaller things but this is the gist of the major issues.
So, about a year ago I messaged the LL about the cats shitting everywhere. About a week or so later there was cat litter alongside my backyard fence. I wasn't seeing cat shit everywhere anymore so I let it go.
We arrive now at last week. Got home from a long night of work, kicked my shoes off, and relaxed. Woke up for work later and started to throw my shoes on just to notice that there was cat shit on them that I had already tracked through to living room.
I was pissed and messaged the landlord "Neighbors let their cats back out again and they are shitting everywhere. Theyve already ruined the mat that was in front of the door when I moved in. There are shit stains all over the porch. I don't want to call animal control cause I doubt they'll do anything but I'm getting tired of having to either clean my shoes or dodge shit everytime I get home from work."
He didn't reply, which I expected as he rarely replies.
A couple days later I get home from work to see a note left in my door. The neighbors wife was pissed. I don't have the note on me right now so I'm going to summarize.
She claimed that the cats do not shit on my side of the house. They shit near their cars "because that's where they are used to shitting" she said that all the shit I'm claiming to be cat shit is chicken, opossum, and raccoon shit. She threatened me with this line "you told the landlord the lie about the cats trying to get us evicted so why shouldn't we tell the landlord that the house smells like weed." yes, my roommate and I smoke. Yes, it's an illegal state. She then goes on to claim "the smoke comes through our oven vent and dryer vent and my clothes reek of weed." I call bullshit because not even my clothes smell like weed. This is legitimately the only complaint I've ever heard them say about my living there. Throughout the letter she claims multiple times that I'm not seeing what I think I'm seeing and I'm just trying to get them evicted.
So, this is where I stand, all I can think of is get photographic evidence of the cats shitting, but I don't really know what it's going to accomplish. The cats definitely need to be taken care of better and them shitting everywhere is not cool either. The other issues I've noted should probably be dealt with as well but domestic violence is a tricky thing to involve myself in. My Gf is mad because I haven't called the cops but I legit don't want to be shot or be evicted/arrested because I smoke weed in my home.
Afterthought: there has been a few instances of the woman being on something, not sure what, and just being a zombie on the porch. I'm playing games and see a figure on the porch. I look out there and there she stands, facing the road, arms and head down, just trying to keep her balance. That was uncomfortable to see to say the least.

So, let's start with the basics. I've been living in this place for almost 3 years now. Prior to living here I rented from the same landlord in a nearby duplex in 2014. My neighbor is a man and his wife. They've been living there together for about 6 years with the man living there for nearly 15. We've remained cordial to this point regardless of the issues that have popped up. At least, that was the case up until recently. We share a front porch that has railing around the ledge and splitting the unit down the middle at the living room.
So, the issues(these aren't listed in any particular order).
First, Over the last 2 or so years they've taken in roughly 7 stray cats. They keep the majority of these cats outside at all times. This wasnt an issue initially as I didn't mind the little fluffballs on the porch but as times gone on it has become an inconvenience. The cats will shit on my porch and walkway leading from the porch to the gravel driveway where I park. I have stepped in cat shit no less than 4 times in the past 2 months. When I moved in I had a welcome mat at the door. Well , after the cats shit on it 4 times in one week and I couldn't get the shit off it the last time so I threw it out. I bought a hose and spray nozzle just to spray cat shit off my porch and shoes. I have tried non-toxic sprays to try and coax them away from my walkway and that hasn't worked. I have spoken directly with both the man and his wife on this topic and all I receive is gaslighting. They claim it's not cat shit, it's actually chicken, raccoon, and opossum shit. Also, these cats are not healthy. They do not look healthy, the majority of cat shit I step in is diarrhea, and their fur is in such poor shape.
Second, roaches. When I first moved in there were roaches. I contacted the landlord and he had pest control out. I also placed multiple different traps at the same time and they died down a bit. The kicker here is I asked the neighbor about the roaches and his response was, and I shit you not, "oh the woman in the other duplex(between 500-1000 feet away from current duplex) was dirty and when she moved out the roaches moved over here." that was roughly 1.5 years ago and the roaches come and go now. I place new traps every few months to try and cull the population as much as possible. I just believe that the neighbors are dirty as all hell as their porch is a mess and I wouldn't doubt the inside is just as bad or worse. Oh, and to top that off, they leave their cat food open on the porch. So, roaches, raccoons(which I've seen eating from the cat plate at night), and opossums all get their fill.
Third, and trigger warning in advance, domestic violence. I'll admit going into that I am ashamed of what I'm going to state here. The man beats his wife. I have heard them fighting on so many occasions. There was one day where I had gotten off work and started to chill and unwind preparing to go to sleep on the recliner in the living room. I heard them start fighting as they normally do. Well, this particular time they brought it out onto the porch. All I heard out my window was things breaking and multiple banging noises. Then just absolute screaming. She was screaming as if she were being murdered. Then there was silence and I heard him say " if you ever talk back to me like that again I will kill you." this is where I am ashamed. I should've called the cops. I didn't. The dude owns a gun, is an alcoholic, and is definitely unhinged enough to retaliate if I were to try and help. I am afraid that there would be retaliatory violence and it is an uncomfortable feeling that I should not feel in my own home.
Fourth, my girlfriend refuses to come over to my house anymore due to the sad looking cats/cat shit, the occasional roach that she sees, and her not wanting to be at my home alone at night(I work nights) knowing how unhinged the neighbor is. She has heard him beating his wife. She is afraid because "what am I supposed to do if he gets really drunk while you're at work and tries to come into the house."
There are a couple smaller things but this is the gist of the major issues.
So, about a year ago I messaged the LL about the cats shitting everywhere. About a week or so later there was cat litter alongside my backyard fence. I wasn't seeing cat shit everywhere anymore so I let it go.
We arrive now at last week. Got home from a long night of work, kicked my shoes off, and relaxed. Woke up for work later and started to throw my shoes on just to notice that there was cat shit on them that I had already tracked through to living room.
I was pissed and messaged the landlord "Neighbors let their cats back out again and they are shitting everywhere. Theyve already ruined the mat that was in front of the door when I moved in. There are shit stains all over the porch. I don't want to call animal control cause I doubt they'll do anything but I'm getting tired of having to either clean my shoes or dodge shit everytime I get home from work."
He didn't reply, which I expected as he rarely replies.
A couple days later I get home from work to see a note left in my door. The neighbors wife was pissed. I don't have the note on me right now so I'm going to summarize.
She claimed that the cats do not shit on my side of the house. They shit near their cars "because that's where they are used to shitting" she said that all the shit I'm claiming to be cat shit is chicken, opossum, and raccoon shit. She threatened me with this line "you told the landlord the lie about the cats trying to get us evicted so why shouldn't we tell the landlord that the house smells like weed." yes, my roommate and I smoke. Yes, it's an illegal state. She then goes on to claim "the smoke comes through our oven vent and dryer vent and my clothes reek of weed." I call bullshit because not even my clothes smell like weed. This is legitimately the only complaint I've ever heard them say about my living there. Throughout the letter she claims multiple times that I'm not seeing what I think I'm seeing and I'm just trying to get them evicted.
So, this is where I stand, all I can think of is get photographic evidence of the cats shitting, but I don't really know what it's going to accomplish. The cats definitely need to be taken care of better and them shitting everywhere is not cool either. The other issues I've noted should probably be dealt with as well but domestic violence is a tricky thing to involve myself in. My Gf is mad because I haven't called the cops but I legit don't want to be shot or be evicted/arrested because I smoke weed in my home.
Afterthought: there has been a few instances of the woman being on something, not sure what, and just being a zombie on the porch. I'm playing games and see a figure on the porch. I look out there and there she stands, facing the road, arms and head down, just trying to keep her balance. That was uncomfortable to see to say the least.

My transcript shows:

971 Amended Tax return or claim forwarded for processing 02-09-2024 $0 977 Amended Tax return filed 02-09-2024 $0 xxxx-xxx-xxxxxx-x 810 Refund Freeze 05-09-2024 $0 

I filed an amended return for year 2022 on 2/9/2024 (my accountant filed original at the final minute on extension in Oct 2023, and submitted everything wrong, but I got a small refund from that). I filed an amended return in February 2024 for year 2022.
I monitored the IRS processing tax forms month and I see they are now processing Amended returns filed in March 2024, whereas I submitted my amended return February 2024. Theoretically, this means my return should have been processed, since they moved on to March? But Where's My Refund tool still shows Received and N/A N/A for processing status
Transcript has codes 971 and 977 on 2/9/2024, and now I see a code 810 on my transcript dated 5/9/2024, which is exactly 3 months to the day from when I filed.
. I haven't received any letters that I know of. Is this "normal" for amended returns and does 810 freeze mean they just started looking at my amended return on that date? Or should I contact an advocate or the IRS to find out if they are needing something from me?
Thanks!

Hello, Ive been trying to find advice by seeing if anyone is in the same situation but cant find anything so i’m going to ask here! (Gonna be a long post because im going to put every detail, I want genuine advice that benefits my cat best)
In 2016 my family cat passed away. We were all devastated, after a while my mum who was previously a property manager found a beautiful calico cat which we presume was 3 years old, that had been left behind and hiding under the house by drug addict tenants. She would come out when my mum fed her, until eventually mum brought her home. We tried our best to keep her inside but she ran away after a week (out the cat door) We didnt know if she would come back.
When she left, my mum rescued an orange kitten that was considered too spicy and was given to us for free. 3 days later the calico cat came back! This time I kept her locked in my room upstairs, Its a massive room, with a narnia room and small balcony overlooking bush, trees and lots of nature. I was 15 at the time. She was extremely anxious, we have no idea how her previous owners treated her or if something had happened to her the week that she ran away. She would hiss at me, hide, didnt want affection. Through time she grew to love me, and became extremely affectionate and comfortable around me.
She became an inside cat, too anxious to go downstairs or leave my room as the orange cat would beat her up if she stepped foot downstairs. This led her to only live in my room. After 8 years the orange cat still attacks her. She enjoys lounging on the balcony with the wind, sun and looking at the birds and knowing she will be safe from my other family cat (hes an outside and inside cat). As I said, my room is very big with lots of windows and sunlight, lots of hiding spots etc. She loves my room. I love her so much, we cuddle to sleep everynight.
I have been with my bf for 5 years and he lives an hour away. I stay every weekend. I am now 23, and he is 25. In 3 weeks I am moving to his parents house, who has a very tiny detached living space about 10m from the main house. It has a bedroom, toilet and shower, kitchenette. We are staying there rent free and plan on saving money and buying a house within 2 years, and then moving my cat in.
The flat has very little windows and is very loud with boy racers driving past. After 5 years, I am ready to get a job down there and be with my bf everyday instead of only the weekends. I dont think she would be happy living there though as she must be around 12, and still is skitty and anxious. She wouldnt be able to leave the room as a main road is right outside. Therefore she wouldnt be able to sunbathe or anything like that.
At my family home, I lived with my mum and sister. When i move, my sister (2 years older) is going to move into my room. She will essentially be my cats main carer, and she really likes my sister and is comfortable around her. I will visit her as much as i can. I cant wait to bring her to a proper home once we buy, where she has a yard and a house to room without getting bullied.
Im also anxious as a person and i feel like im a bad cat mum. Will she be okay? :(

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/Born_Analysis8995
Originally posted to self
My (16m) mom (40f) confessed that she is my sister and I now feel bad
Trigger Warnings: death of a loved one, past sexual assault, teen pregnancy, drugs and alcohol use, mentions of overdose
Original Post (Wayback Machine): May 11, 2024
Idk why I feel so much guilt about this whole situation. This happened 5 days ago, 1 week after my 16th birthday.
So my mom (sister) explained our entire family situation. Her mom (my bio mom) was assaulted as a teenager (15) and was forced to keep the child because of her parents, eventually giving birth to my mom. They struggled a lot during this time and my mom was resented by her mom so she moved away as soon as she was 18 and went NC. Her mom began spiralling with drugs, alcohol, etc once she left and eventually ended up pregnant again with me around the time my mom was 23. However, she was deemed unfit to raise me so they managed to contact my mom and she agreed to take me in. My bio mom never really recovered and ended up overdosing a year later.
This completely surprised me because I genuinely never had clue I wasn't actually my mom's child. We look very much alike and she went to great lengths to become my mom. She said that I don't need to call her mom anymore and that I deserved to know the truth before I turn 18. This upset me and I absolutely disagreed with her and said that no matter what she would always be my mom and I would always call her that because she is in every way my mom. And we both cried over this and hugged and I thanked her for telling me the truth also.
The thing that is eating away at me though is that she sacrificed so much to raise me and I can't repay her in any way. Like she hasn't dated at all even though I know that she wants a partner. She also changed professions to better accommodate me. She has done so much and I can't repay her in any way. And I haven't always been the best to her either. I was definitely difficult as a child and recently I haven't really been listening and respecting her as much as I should be. And I know I've probably said some mean things over the years, mostly around wanting to be with my dad (she initially said that she had a husband that abandoned us when I was born). All of this just made me feel so much guilt and sadness. And I know if I talk to her about it she'll just reassure me that she is happy and I shouldn't worry but I can't get rid of this feeling.
I've decided that I'm going to be the best son ever and do everything she says from now on. But I still can't get rid of this feeling. I don't know what to do.
Relevant/Top Comments
YoungeCurmudgeon4: Your sister is an amazing woman and an incredible person and deserves all the love and respect in the world.
As for you, handling this so well takes a lot in a person. Be proud of yourself. And always believe in yourself.

OOP: Thanks I'll try my best ❤️ My love for her is probably at an all time high. I wish I'd know earlier so that I could have always treated her this way.

TraditionalShop6800: Talk to your mom, thank her and tell you are grateful for how she raised you. And now, she should think about herself too. Encourage her to date again and find a partner.

OOP: Okay I will. I think I'll take some time to figure out the right words to say to her 😅

Galactus1701: Repay her by being the best person you can be. Help her, be respectful, study and always be grateful.

OOP: Absolutely will be the best son I can 😅

BiasCutTweed: You have to also give yourself a little grace here - your mom sounds amazing and deserves all the best, but what she clearly wanted for you was to give you a normal, stable childhood. And it’s very normal for children to act out sometimes, to say things in anger, to be difficult. It’s all a part of growing up.
The good thing is that it’s easy to see from your reaction to what she told you that she did an amazing job and you’re well on your way to becoming a great person she will be proud of. Take all of this and let it strengthen those good qualities. Do your best for her and yourself but don’t beat yourself up for past mistakes you can’t change. You don’t need to repay her for the choices she made, you just need to live a life that makes you both happy.

OOP: Thank you for the advice ❤️ I'll definitely try my best to feel proud of myself and also make her happy

 
Mini Update: May 12, 2024
I've literally been tearing up from all the comments and messages from everyone. I am honestly so grateful for all the kind words and reassurance. Genuinely thanks so much ❤️
Not much of an update really but I thought I would still share. I took a few pieces of advice and have done them randomly during day. Firstly Happy Mother's Day everyone. Hope you had a great time. Me and my mom had a few things planned for today and I got back just over an hour ago now. We went to the cinema then a restaurant and ended the day with bowling. Honestly had an absolute blast and she was happy throughout. I got her a gift too, it was a photo engraved bracelet which I gave her at the end of bowling.
One advice I got was saying things that show her I care about her so I said "Your the best" and hugged her after the cinema. I also said "I love you" when giving her the bracelet which made her cry 😭
I still do feel the guilt but I'm not gonna let it get me down. Don't want more stress especially with exams coming up 😅 I saw a lot of comments mentioning that I shouldn't keep my feelings bottled up so I am planning on conveying all my feelings to her soon. I'll probably write a letter because I know I'll probably start crying before I even start speaking 😂 I think that will definitely give me some peace of mind. Thanks all again for taking the time to read this ❤️
(Also I completely forgot how biology works in my last post 😅 She would be my half-sister not sister since I doubt our father's were the same. But regardless I'm still going to call her mom 😁)
 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

I was evicted by my own parents on Christmas Eve via texting war with my step day during a 10hr shift as a barber. I was informed my youngest daughter (6) wouldn’t be returning from her fathers house for Christmas that same day. My oldest daughter (16) and I were casted out of our family’s traditional Christmas festivities and we spent Christmas Eve and Day alone. The day after she went to “lunch” with my ex mother in law and never came home. I was devastated which caused a pain flare up (fybromiaga/myofacial pain syndrome/stage 4 endometriosis, degenerative disc disease). I couldn’t get out of bed. I had to call off. I was fired on January 3rd. On January 6th I was pulled over and arrested because the passenger of my vehicle had put 3GS of crack in an old prescription bottle of mine she stole from my house earlier that day. January 8th my phone was turned off. On the 10th my car broke down and I just got it back yesterday morning.
While my phone was off I missed every call and message sent to me by Child Services. I missed every opportunity to defend myself against the lies and accusations made by my ex. My mom had started forwarding my mail to the post office without my knowledge. I received not 1 certified letter. I missed my first 2 court dates.
I spent almost a month alone in the house I was abused in as a child/teen. The house I shared with my daughters, no car, no phone, no money, and eventually no food.
In a span of two weeks, I lost my kids, my family, my house, my job, my phone, my car, and was arrested.
I’ve never been in trouble in my life. Always had full custody of all three of my children find the age of 17. and for the most part without any involvement of their fathers outside of the weekends. But I lost all of it. My ex had manipulated my family in believing complete lies about me. Smear campaigns surround me every day. Every morning I wake up and realize where I am, and how far away from my children I am and I lose it. I cry every time I open my eyes. It’s been months. And every day it hurts more. Because I can’t afford a lawyer, there’s a very good chance I won’t get them back.
My son (22) lives in a different state but calls almost daily bc he knows he is the one that is keeping me here. But if I lose custody of my youngest daughter, like I did my oldest, there’s no way I can continue living like this, feeling this much pain, physically and emotionally every single day. My little one. I cry all day every day. She was my sidekick . We went everywhere together. She was right by my side since the day she was born, She is my best buddy and they ripped her away from me. Without a single conversation. Not one. My exes, vindictive, hateful actions can only possibly be fueled by his desire to not go to jail for the $15,000 he owes in back child support. Up until a week before this, he was still trying to come back home. Still making advances on me. Leading me to believe that we were friends. But now I know it was all part of the plan. He had been plotting for months. Because my family operates in such negativity towards me they happily took the bait. I will never speak to any of them again. And the only reason why I haven’t been able to get my children back is because he dismantled my life by ensuring that I couldn’t afford a lawyer. Nothing in the report was true. It was all lies based on hearsay. So I’m here to warn you… no matter how good of a mother you are, if someone is determined to take everything away from you, they will. All I have left to do is pray to whatever God will listen to me. A lawyer shows up at my doorstep, expecting zero payment, and they fight to bring the truth to light. for me. Otherwise this is all going to end soon for me. I just can’t handle the sadness. I haven’t seen my daughter since December 20, 2020 23. I never gone more than two days without her before that. my heart aches more at the thought of her being alone without her mother than it does for myself. My teenager is not trapped with her abusive narcissistic, father. Being treated like dog shit. Unable to speak to me or her brother. All my family invites that monster and his mistress to Easter and breaks bread with them. It’s all so twisted. I just want this nightmare to end.
Thank you for allowing me to vent.

Long story short, with 0 notice to 5 tenants, my landlord gave a house key to a stranger, who rented MY room because he assumed I had vacated…
For background: Last night, my roommate called me and said that someone unlocked the door with a key, and walked in claiming that they lived here and paid rent for May. They put a bunch of belongings into MY room that I paid for until the end of May. It was my surprise when I found a gun in my closet under my belongings! My lease is month to month and on April 15, I notified my landlord that May would be my last month renting and that I would be vacated by the 31st. I ended up moving to another place in late April, however, I still had to pay for May so I would hangout there on my lunch breaks and kept some nonessential belongings there for the time being. One of my roommates, there are 5 of us total, asked if I had been by the house that day as a lot of things were moved around, including things that were moved out of my room. The other roommates are out of town so they obviously could not have moved anything. When we told the landlord he admitted his mistake, however this random stranger has a key to our apartment and the landlord rented out my room that was already occupied. The landlord gave 0 notice to any of the 5 tenants. He also came inside the house many times with no written notice ever. I am expecting my full security deposit back, considering that he rented out my room to someone else who could have caused damages. I also expect compensation for May rent and invasion of privacy. What do I do?

Hi everyone! So I (21m) am in a ldr with my girlfriend (23f) for just over 2 years now. We are both med students and she is in her intern year and I'm in my 3rd year. Our communication has always been great and we have regular date nights, sending presents and letter to each other and have agreed to meet at minimum 3 times a year for no less than 2 weeks.
But recently she has been coming back from work, face timing me and then ending the call early saying that she's overstimulated from work and she needs some alone time. I understand exactly how she feels and realise how draining the hospital can be, especially after an ER shift.
Where my worry lies is that she has begun to go out partying more often and seems to be fine, despite coming back from an overnight shift or long hours. Neither of us enjoy clubbing so we always prefer to do house parties when we get the chance. My issue is that on the days that she feels fine after work, she prefers to go out to her best friends house and the days she feels bad she calls me for 5 minutes and then goes to sleep. Our calling has dropped from around 5-6 hours a week to maybe 20 minutes most. She is coming to visit me in July and she says she's ecstatic on staying at my house and just enjoying us time, but her actions dont reflect that at all. I feel she has begun to care less about us just talking and on some days I won't get a text from her at all despite it being her day off and me still being able to find time on shift to text.
This is my first relationship and I'm scared that these are signs it's coming to an end, could I have people's opinions on this please? Thank you all!

(TW:we were 14, now I'm 15 and she's still 14/uncensored words about s*xual assault/cussing, just putting this in here since I know someone would most likely report me for not adding it) So just around Christmas eve last year, I started dating with one of my long-time friends, and my life prior to this was just empty, but she brought light in me, she made me feel something I never felt before, I felt alive for the first time in a long while, and everything was going great, I loved her, and she loved me, so I promised her that I will love her as much as I can until my heart stops and my mind fades, however things took a terrible turn when L (first letter in his name) entered our lives, originally it was just a one time thing where me, my GF, friends and L would go out, and we were drinking and shit, just having fun, we'll now comes the worst part, L was 21 at the time, and so to hang out a little longer we went to his place to chill, but then everyone left, and it was just me, GF and L, and we were just chatting, having fun, but then he started talking about our relationship, he started undermining it, talking about how we were not made for each other, that the only reason we are still dating is because we were long-time friends and shit, and I had none of that, however (I will start calling the GF, S) S took those words to her heart and started crying, I tried to comfort her but then he started putting pressure on me, bombarding me with questions like:DO you really love her? What do you love about her, why do you love her, do you think you two will last together? And under the pressure I just said that I loved her, and that's enough, but at this point S needed to go home, so I offered to walk with her like a good bf, however L said that I should stay and let her be, so she can think about this, and once again under pressure I folded and I stayed and she went home sobbing with me not having the chance to console her (looking at it now I should've persisted on walking her home, because he would start laying his manipulation on me, once again undermining me, and my love to S, but I did send her a voice message telling her all the things I love about her, and that I found the purpose for why I'm with her, she completes me) so after a few moments I left and came home, the next day I talked to my sister that we two are "friends" and she started going batshit, because my sister also has long extensive history with L, as well as my sister's friend, and my cousins, so she started telling me all the things, he did including (allegedly but probably truthfully) giving alcohol to one of my sister's friends (who was also around 14) getting her drunk, and then letting one of his friends rape her while watching (he probably joined in as I think about it) and many other stains, same thing with the cousin and sister's friend, but the problem was that S started liking L, and we started going out every single day after school, I took the info from the sister, cousin etc and I wanted to talk with S about it, however when I was about to initiate the conversation, I started overthinking and got to my head that I'm probably just being possessive, so we would continue these meet-ups with L for 2 more days,, every day ending with S crying, L completely undermining our trust and love, and me ultimately feeling shit, but at the last meet-up, just before it, I found cracks in our love, since L was dating with a 14 year old before that (He's 21 by the fucking way) S told me that 14 and 21 isn't too crazy and bad, I knew what was gonna happen, it would ultimately end up with her coming up to me, and telling me that "we need to talk tommorow" and I knew, I knew this was it, and I knew I was now powerless to do anything, she broke up with me, i was inconsolable, however the reason why she did it was the sentence that he said, that would turn out to be the most mind numbing, shit filled junk I'd ever hear "you need a man that can show you the world" I came home told my sister, and since she had S added on Instagram she started messaging her, warning her about L, his history, how he is, even her friend tried to tell her, and what his true colors are, even my cousin started planning with me and some of his friends, who L also fucked over, that we would beat the shit out of L, however, I started messaging him about it and the shit that happened, it was mostly just me writing a paragraph about how he was the biggest mistake in our lives and that he never acted like a true friend, he started firing back with shit like he never said anything bad, he was always supportive, and that I just overlooked it, however nothing changed, around a month came by, I started cutting myself, had the worst depression I've ever had, (I just recently realized this so I'll just put this out here) L and S started dating, I don't know for how long, when it started or when it ended, but L apparently spread the word of them two dating, all around the city, also at that point, L's manipulation started cracking too, and too little too late, S finally realized who Really is, so she broke up with him, (also in the month I asked her 3 times to reconsider, to think about it, and to give me one more chance, dismissing me every time) and so the depression arc continued until around April when I started slightly healing and getting used to not being with S, but then me and S started talking again, as friends, and I got re-added to a group chat I haven't mentioned before, (since it wasn't important) from which I got removed by one of the friends because she called me out for being a Wretch, so I got re-added and when I was gone, there have been some drama that I didn't knew of (that's where I found out that S and L were dating, and at prom where I danced with S, I found out something horrible which is the reason I added truthfully to the part where L probably raped the 14 year old girl too, I'm not gonna specify ) I was in utter shock, but yeah, shit went, and well we started talking more, that's where the promise I made turned into a curse, no matter how hard i tried, no matter how much I insisted and promised, my feelings never went away, so some more happened, and just yesterday until 3 am today (it's 5 am when I'm writing this) me and S went on a bike trip, since I want to stay close to her, we rode for 7 hours, chatting, laughing and having a good time, while I tried to make it as comfortable and enjoyable to her as possible, and we threw around a conversation about L, she said that he was the worst thing to ever happen, which I completely agree with, but I couldn't shake off this feeling because (it may just be overthinking) but it seemed like she started liking me again, she would constantly smile at me, look at me, having fun and it was just great, but now as I'm writing this I realized the situation, she is the reason why I continue living, her smile, her eyes, her personality, and just her, the only thing driving me into another day is the thought that one day I could maybe be hers again, and she could be mine. However I can't tell anyone expect the stranger on reddit, since if I'd tell my family they'd probably scold me, my friends would laugh at me, and God forbid I'd tell her eyes to eyes. I'm just at a crossroad where every turn I take is wrong and I'm just hanging on something that will never be, but the feeling that the impossible could happen, is the only thing keeping me going. Sorry for this long ass vent but I just needed to take it out, and I'm nearly sure someone will go full on detective mode to try and find, names, locations and shit, but I could just care less

Looking for some advice and this seemed like a great place to ask!
We own a small independent pizza shop, and are working on opening up a coffee shop for my wife. Not on the restaurant Equipment business.
I recently saw the Red Lobster Auctions and while I didn't need 90% of the stuff, I saw a great opportunity to get a full POS, lots of plates, smallwares, etc, for a deal.
We actually were outbid but the winner failed to pay so it was offered to us. Awesome! Except then the trouble started.
The auctions were listed as Entire Restaurant Contents. There was a "Sample" inventory list but it was noted that items would vary by location. In the photos on the auction were two items of great interest: A large Ice Maker and a Conveyor Dish Washer.
Thursday evening I contacted two movers who specialized in restaurants (which actually cost significantly more than the auction itself), due to all the stuff being listed as having to be our by end of day Friday. Then I was told the pickup window was actually only 6 hours (9 AM to 3 PM), no big deal though, hired one more mover.
Next bit of trouble came after paying for the auction, which is when they sent an exclusions list. On it there were two exclusions of concern: Dishwashers (if Eco Lab Branded) and Ice Makers in some locations. I verified the pictures of the Dishwasher, no Eco Lab branding, phew. Verified that the ice maker was not only in the list of items but also in the pictures. Figure my location must not exclude it, otherwise why show 5 pictures detailing it.
Then my team arrives. Everything is gone except for the big equipment. The televisions at the bar, the pots, pans, cleaning supplies, smallwares, blenders, mixer. The only things left was the large equipment, most of which was connected, and tables / booths.
For reference on this next parts, my bid on live auction was on Monday, this was now Friday. Two representatives were on site: The old General Manager representating Red Lobster, and a sub contractor representing the interests of the auction company.
When asked about all the missing equipment, the General Manager said they bought a large dumpster on Wednesday and all her team came in and threw everything away in the dumpster, which was already gone. Extremely unlikely, as I doubt Red Lobster would spend the money to throw away items that they're auctioning off. It got even weirder when "employees" showed up and were overheard talking about picking up items from the restaurant.
While my team leader tried to sort all of that out, the rest of my guys went to work on disassembling items. Except, Everytime they touched something (undercounter bar cooler, bar taps, booths, etc) they were told, "Oh no, that's not included," or, "Someone else already bought that."
After about 2 hours of back and forth, the on site representation finally conceded to let us take MOST of the stuff that was still there (which wasn't much). Because of the now reduced time of only 4 hours, most of the valuable stuff being gone already, and the high end items like the dishwasher and ice machine now being excluded, we only filled 2 of the 3 trucks.
I have called the auction company and apparently they said that my experience was not alone, and they were currently having a warroom on what to do next because of all the issues. They said they will likely have some solutions in how to make it right on Monday. The representative on site tried to get my team to sign a waiver of liability before leaving, but we refused.
What can I expect from this process now, and do I have any legal recourse? I would have thought that the buildings would have been secured to prevent theft while the auction was going on but obviously not. My biggest concern is that, while my costs weren't horrible at 15k, only $5500 was to the actual auction, the rest was to transportation. I certainly have concerns now that I won't be able to make my money back, let alone a profit. I know that it's a gamble, but I feel like this experience was borderline fraudulent. Any suggestions?
ETA:
If nothing else, I feel like the auction violates the law in my state (Florida), as there is a statute that covers misrepresenting facts. Specifically FSS 468.388 Subsection 11b 1 through 3 which reads:
No licensed auctioneer, apprentice, or auction business may disseminate or cause to be disseminated any advertisement or advertising which is false, deceptive, misleading, or untruthful. Any advertisement or advertising shall be deemed to be false, deceptive, misleading, or untruthful if it:
1. Contains misrepresentations of facts.
2. Is misleading or deceptive because, in its content or in the context in which it is presented, it makes only a partial disclosure of relevant facts.
3. Creates false or unjustified expectations of the services to be performed.
The auctions were listed as Entire contents, with the only exclusions listed on the auction in the terms being "Photos may show items that are not included in auction (e.g., infrastructure, HVAC, plumbing, etc."
Here's the link for anyone interested in how it was presented
https://bid.restaurantequipment.bid/Public/Auction/AuctionItemDetail?AuctionItemId=NZQh8wj3FOYwR439WdiUvw%3d%3d&AuctionId=S5YS%2bHqu8A9zcHp0d1tyMg%3d%3d&pageNumber=WddRnDis30ojx01x46RicQ%3d%3d&pageSize=WddRnDis30ojx01x46RicQ%3d%3d

Looking for some advice and this seemed like a great place to ask!
We own a small independent pizza shop, and are working on opening up a coffee shop for my wife. Not on the restaurant Equipment business.
I recently saw the Red Lobster Auctions and while I didn't need 90% of the stuff, I saw a great opportunity to get a full POS, lots of plates, smallwares, etc, for a deal.
We actually were outbid but the winner failed to pay so it was offered to us. Awesome! Except then the trouble started.
The auctions were listed as Entire Restaurant Contents. There was a "Sample" inventory list but it was noted that items would vary by location. In the photos on the auction were two items of great interest: A large Ice Maker and a Conveyor Dish Washer.
Thursday evening I contacted two movers who specialized in restaurants (which actually cost significantly more than the auction itself), due to all the stuff being listed as having to be our by end of day Friday. Then I was told the pickup window was actually only 6 hours (9 AM to 3 PM), no big deal though, hired one more mover.
Next bit of trouble came after paying for the auction, which is when they sent an exclusions list. On it there were two exclusions of concern: Dishwashers (if Eco Lab Branded) and Ice Makers in some locations. I verified the pictures of the Dishwasher, no Eco Lab branding, phew. Verified that the ice maker was not only in the list of items but also in the pictures. Figure my location must not exclude it, otherwise why show 5 pictures detailing it.
Then my team arrives. Everything is gone except for the big equipment. The televisions at the bar, the pots, pans, cleaning supplies, smallwares, blenders, mixer. The only things left was the large equipment, most of which was connected, and tables / booths.
For reference on this next parts, my bid on live auction was on Monday, this was now Friday. Two representatives were on site: The old General Manager representating Red Lobster, and a sub contractor representing the interests of the auction company.
When asked about all the missing equipment, the General Manager said they bought a large dumpster on Wednesday and all her team came in and threw everything away in the dumpster, which was already gone. Extremely unlikely, as I doubt Red Lobster would spend the money to throw away items that they're auctioning off. It got even weirder when "employees" showed up and were overheard talking about picking up items from the restaurant.
While my team leader tried to sort all of that out, the rest of my guys went to work on disassembling items. Except, Everytime they touched something (undercounter bar cooler, bar taps, booths, etc) they were told, "Oh no, that's not included," or, "Someone else already bought that."
After about 2 hours of back and forth, the on site representation finally conceded to let us take MOST of the stuff that was still there (which wasn't much). Because of the now reduced time of only 4 hours, most of the valuable stuff being gone already, and the high end items like the dishwasher and ice machine now being excluded, we only filled 2 of the 3 trucks.
I have called the auction company and apparently they said that my experience was not alone, and they were currently having a warroom on what to do next because of all the issues. They said they will likely have some solutions in how to make it right on Monday. The representative on site tried to get my team to sign a waiver of liability before leaving, but we refused.
What can I expect from this process now, and do I have any legal recourse? I would have thought that the buildings would have been secured to prevent theft while the auction was going on but obviously not. My biggest concern is that, while my costs weren't horrible at 15k, only $5500 was to the actual auction, the rest was to transportation. I certainly have concerns now that I won't be able to make my money back, let alone a profit. I know that it's a gamble, but I feel like this experience was borderline fraudulent. Any suggestions?
ETA:
If nothing else, I feel like the auction violates the law in my state (Florida), as there is a statute that covers misrepresenting facts. Specifically FSS 468.388 Subsection 11b 1 through 3 which reads:
No licensed auctioneer, apprentice, or auction business may disseminate or cause to be disseminated any advertisement or advertising which is false, deceptive, misleading, or untruthful. Any advertisement or advertising shall be deemed to be false, deceptive, misleading, or untruthful if it:
1. Contains misrepresentations of facts.
2. Is misleading or deceptive because, in its content or in the context in which it is presented, it makes only a partial disclosure of relevant facts.
3. Creates false or unjustified expectations of the services to be performed.
The auctions were listed as Entire contents, with the only exclusions listed on the auction in the terms being "Photos may show items that are not included in auction (e.g., infrastructure, HVAC, plumbing, etc."
Here's the link for anyone interested in how it was presented
https://bid.restaurantequipment.bid/Public/Auction/AuctionItemDetail?AuctionItemId=NZQh8wj3FOYwR439WdiUvw%3d%3d&AuctionId=S5YS%2bHqu8A9zcHp0d1tyMg%3d%3d&pageNumber=WddRnDis30ojx01x46RicQ%3d%3d&pageSize=WddRnDis30ojx01x46RicQ%3d%3d

Hey guys, I (25M) wanted to post this here and get some advice of what to do next? I have been considering legal action, but I wonder if I have much of a case here. Some key things to note:

• I live in Nevada, USA, which is a right-to-work state and I was about to complete my 6-month probationary period before I was let go.
• I never signed off on a termination letter or any written statement about what happened
• The company I work for is a private company

I have been talking to my company's HR department about what happened and am still waiting to see what they say at the time of writing this. I'll just copy and paste what happened from the written statement I gave them:
"On 5/9/24 I was originally scheduled to work at 2 PM, and was heading into our office on the second floor when Chris, my director, was waiting for me at the elevator doors. At that moment, I did not know he requested to speak with me as I had not checked my messages yet prior to arriving to work. I followed him to a meeting room behind the bar on the casino floor and sat down with him and Kevin, a new Operations Manager that had just been promoted, as a witness. Chris informed me that I was being let go, to my shock. I asked why. He gave me a rather vague answer about how many factors have led to this decision, but he does not believe that I will mesh well with the team long-term and unfortunately it has come to this. When I had first started in my position, Chris and I had only two conversations about my progress and his concerns:
One was with my former superior Paul and Chris about how some of my behavior was a bit distracting to others and while it is good to be enjoying your work, please focus on my work and try to conversate with my coworkers about things relating to the job. I understood that, and took it in stride. I reigned it in and focused more on my tasks at hand and never heard another such complaint.
The second was when I had incorrectly scored an NHL game one night and the mistake was not found out until the next day, causing an all-around headache. I had similar, more minor mistakes in the past, so Chris told me to do better and that while mistakes are bound to happen, to have a better attention to detail. I understood and had improved in the months since that conversation and I hadn't made a mistake like that since.
With these in mind, I said to Chris that he couldn't deny that I hadn't improved since starting my position and my former issues had already been rectified, to which he agreed. So I asked him to give me a more tangible reason behind his decision. He cited my interactions with my coworker Logan made her feel uncomfortable in the office.
Logan is a girl the same age as me and her desk is on the other side of the room. My interactions with her were limited simply because of this fact and the most I ever spoke to her was greeting her when I arrived in the office, as I greeted everyone else, and benign small talk. May 9th is also her birthday, as I had heard from some of her other coworkers, so I even got her a birthday card and a singular cupcake that day.
For the record: I never singled her out in this treatment; in fact many times I had offered snacks or food to fellow coworkers. I even brought in staple snacks in Chinese culture for Chinese New Year this year a few months ago for the whole office to try. I offered them to everyone including Logan, as it is a big day in my culture and unfortunately I had to celebrate while at work. In my opinion, things like reminders of your birthday while at work is a very inclusive gesture and I was actively trying to make our company a better place to work at by promoting a more positive culture by setting an example. I even asked a coworker for his birthday so I could remember when it came around, as I realized I didn't know anyone's birthday yet. I did not mean anything by my actions, if they truly were making Logan feel uncomfortable, and I think some sort of warning beforehand would have been more than fair. If Logan herself was too uncomfortable with saying it to me personally, I could've also have heard it from any of my superiors first.
I made this point in my conversation with Chris; his only reply to me was that some people aren't comfortable enough doing that without hurting anyone's feelings. I feel that there is something more than what Chris told me and Logan's perception of me may not be the only reason I was terminated. And if Logan's perception of me was a deciding factor in my termination, I do not appreciate that treatment or assumptions being made of me simply because I am a man and she is a woman and therefore all my actions are perceived as malicious and/or having ulterior motives."

***My Impersonators (DO NOT TRADE WITH): Right-Trick-5848, righttick_5848 Note the misspellings, note the dash "-" instead of the underscore "_", always verify it is me in PMs
Amazon DE Germany, FR France, ES Spain @ 60%
Razergold Global/USA @ 65%
Steam: Any currency @ 60%
UK: Amazon, Asda, Currys, Argos, Tesco, Sainsburys, Morrisons, John Lewis, Love2Shop, One4all, Justeat, Wickes, Ikea, Screwfix, Deliveroo, Ubereats, Cex, Uber, Game, TKMaxx, Whsmiths, M&S, Marks and Spencer etc @ 60-70%
UK other cards but at lower rates: ASOS,Accessorize,Adidas,Aer Lingus,Airbnb,Allsaints,American Golf,Apple Itunes,Ask Italian,B&Q,Beaverbooks,Bella Italia,Bonus Bonds,Boohoo,Boots,Boux Avenue,Bunnings,Burberry,Cafe Rouge,Caffe Nero,Claires,Clarks,Coast,Compliment Vouchers,Compliments Experience Days,Coop,Costa Coffee,Dining Out,EE,Ernest Jones,Espa,Everyman Cinema,Experience Days,Fat Face,Flannels,Foot Locker,Fortnum & Mason,Frankies & Bennys,Gap,Giffgaff,Goldsmiths,Google Play,H&M,H.Samuel,HMV,Halfords,Harrods,Harvey Nichols,Hollister,Hotel Chocolat,House of Fraser,Jack Wills,Jd Sports,Karen Millen,LMG Jewellery,Lakeland,Lasiguanas,Leisure Vouchers,Liberty,Mamas & Papas,Mango,Matalan,Michael Cors,Miller & Carter,Monsoon,Moss Bros,Nandos,National Book Tokens,National Rail,Netflix,New Look,Next,Nike,Nintendo,Now TV,O2,Odeon,Pandora,Paul Smith,Pets at home,Pizza Express,Pizza Hut,Play Store,Playstation PSN,Prezzo,Primark,Quiz Clothing,Red Letter Days,Restaurant Choice,River Island,Selfridges,Signet Connect,Spafinder,Sports Direct,Spotify,Sunglass Hut,Superdry,Swarovski,Sweaty Betty,Ted Baker,The Body Shop,The Jockey Club,The Range,The White Company,Theatre Tokens,Thomas Pink,Three,Ticketmaster,Trailfinders,Tui,Turtle Bay,UGG Australia,Victoria Secret,Virgin,Virgin Experience Days,Vue Cinema,Waterstones,Wh Smith,WhSmith,Xbox Microsoft,Zara
Star.bucks: Any currency @ 50%
Rates are for paypal G&S, if paypal F&F then 5% less, if anything else then 10% less.
If no proof of source of gift card or low value then 5% less
My confirmed trades pinned in my profile (plus GCX registered "Experienced trader")
can pay by transferwise, paypal, skrill, revolut, most crypto listed on binance, ethereum eth, litecoin ltc, bitcoin btc.
gift codes one 4 all tk maxx

***My Impersonators (DO NOT TRADE WITH): Right-Trick-5848, righttick_5848 Note the misspellings, note the dash "-" instead of the underscore "_", always verify it is me in PMs
Amazon DE Germany, FR France, ES Spain @ 60%
Razergold Global/USA @ 65%
Steam: Any currency @ 60%
UK: Amazon, Asda, Currys, Argos, Tesco, Sainsburys, Morrisons, John Lewis, Love2Shop, One4all, Justeat, Wickes, Ikea, Screwfix, Deliveroo, Ubereats, Cex, Uber, Game, TKMaxx, Whsmiths, M&S, Marks and Spencer etc @ 60-70%
UK other cards but at lower rates: ASOS,Accessorize,Adidas,Aer Lingus,Airbnb,Allsaints,American Golf,Apple Itunes,Ask Italian,B&Q,Beaverbooks,Bella Italia,Bonus Bonds,Boohoo,Boots,Boux Avenue,Bunnings,Burberry,Cafe Rouge,Caffe Nero,Claires,Clarks,Coast,Compliment Vouchers,Compliments Experience Days,Coop,Costa Coffee,Dining Out,EE,Ernest Jones,Espa,Everyman Cinema,Experience Days,Fat Face,Flannels,Foot Locker,Fortnum & Mason,Frankies & Bennys,Gap,Giffgaff,Goldsmiths,Google Play,H&M,H.Samuel,HMV,Halfords,Harrods,Harvey Nichols,Hollister,Hotel Chocolat,House of Fraser,Jack Wills,Jd Sports,Karen Millen,LMG Jewellery,Lakeland,Lasiguanas,Leisure Vouchers,Liberty,Mamas & Papas,Mango,Matalan,Michael Cors,Miller & Carter,Monsoon,Moss Bros,Nandos,National Book Tokens,National Rail,Netflix,New Look,Next,Nike,Nintendo,Now TV,O2,Odeon,Pandora,Paul Smith,Pets at home,Pizza Express,Pizza Hut,Play Store,Playstation PSN,Prezzo,Primark,Quiz Clothing,Red Letter Days,Restaurant Choice,River Island,Selfridges,Signet Connect,Spafinder,Sports Direct,Spotify,Sunglass Hut,Superdry,Swarovski,Sweaty Betty,Ted Baker,The Body Shop,The Jockey Club,The Range,The White Company,Theatre Tokens,Thomas Pink,Three,Ticketmaster,Trailfinders,Tui,Turtle Bay,UGG Australia,Victoria Secret,Virgin,Virgin Experience Days,Vue Cinema,Waterstones,Wh Smith,WhSmith,Xbox Microsoft,Zara
Star.bucks: Any currency @ 50%
Rates are for paypal G&S, if paypal F&F then 5% less, if anything else then 10% less.
If no proof of source of gift card or low value then 5% less
My confirmed trades pinned in my profile (plus GCX registered "Experienced trader")
can pay by transferwise, paypal, skrill, revolut, most crypto listed on binance, ethereum eth, litecoin ltc, bitcoin btc.
gift codes one 4 all tk maxx

Hi everyone, wasn’t sure where to post this so I hope here is ok. My company have asked for suggestions/feedback on benefits they’d like us to see offered, and I’d love to hear what others get at their jobs that might help us brainstorm.
For reference, we’re an online retailer (15 office staff) with a warehouse (5-10 casuals). But happy to hear other suggestions even they might not be right for us, because it might spark another idea.
We currently get a 1/2 day off for our birthday, constant free sample products, staff discount of 40% off, and some other services.
Thanks in advance!

I truly wouldn’t wish this on my own worst enemy and I don’t even have any enemies. My child is going to graduate HS next month and I can’t even bear to go, because I know my oder is going to be a distraction.(and that’s not including the immense anxiety I developed with this) I just know I’m breaking his heart and it’s breaking mines in return. I had to quit my job, because I literally had to hype myself up to get on public transportation. Then wasted money on cabs home. I’m in debt and on the verge of eviction, because I can’t get a wfh job to save my life even though I’m qualified. I’ve tried sports betting and I’m embarrassed to say how much money I’ve lost doing that.
My BB story is different than others on here. My situation did not start until about six years ago.I started getting extreme heartburn, and would vomit everyday after every meal no matter what I ate. I was in and out of different doctor’s offices everyday. After about four months I was diagnosed with H pylori and gerd, around this time I also found out I had an immuneefficiency disorder(which made sense because I’m always sick, even as a child) I was prescribed AMX, MET, multivitamins and iron to help with the immunity. The meds honestly did not feel like they were working. About two months after that I lost my mother(who had no life insurance, plz y’all get life insurance) abruptly and had to take on the responsibility of raising my little sister on top of being a single father to my own child. All of that put me in a downward spiral of anxiety and depression, so I turned to weed to help numb some of my pain. I then lost my job four months before the pandemic started. Thank goodness I had some money saved and unemployment was approved. A year later I found a job and stopped smoking, but I started to hear whispers around the office about me having bb 5 months in, I assumed it was because I still was experiencing GERD. At this point chewing a piece of gum every few hours was saving me. Three months after that I contracted three bacterial infections(from tacobell) and was on three different antibiotics to help cure that. I lost that job because I literally could not move out of bathroom. A few months later I was able to get another job at the start of the following year, but was already extremely paranoid about my bb. After nine months there I was finally told my breath does in fact smell from here to there, but not all the time. I took a short leave of absence to try and resolve the issue. I completely changed my diet to vegan and started taking apple cider gummies, also come to find out I’m allergic to something in the multivitamins. After my month was up I completely lost confidence in myself, because I knew I still had bb. I truly tried my best to work through it because I had mouths to feed. On New Year’s day 2023 I became sick with Covid for the first time. That’s when everything changed. My bb became room filling to the point where I could hear ppl coughing and sneezing, and see them covering their noses, because of this horrid smell emitting from my body. I was able to take another loa, because my boss over heard me tell my sister I was going to kms. I went to a IG and had an upper endoscopy done. “Everything was fine” and he could not smell anything. I want to a dentist(Dr. Fox) that claimed he specialized in bad breath disorders and could cure me after paying $3500 it failed. So here we are now a year later trying hundreds of different probiotics, anti fungal, toothpaste, mouthwashes, tongue scrapers. Just scraping by, broke, jobless and almost homeless. What a life!

First Time Restaurant Equipment went very wrong. What now?
Looking for some advice and this seemed like a great place to ask!
We own a small independent pizza shop, and are working on opening up a coffee shop for my wife. Not on the restaurant Equipment business.
I recently saw the Red Lobster Auctions and while I didn't need 90% of the stuff, I saw a great opportunity to get a full POS, lots of plates, smallwares, etc, for a deal.
We actually were outbid but the winner failed to pay so it was offered to us. Awesome! Except then the trouble started.
The auctions were listed as Entire Restaurant Contents. There was a "Sample" inventory list but it was noted that items would vary by location. In the photos on the auction were two items of great interest: A large Ice Maker and a Conveyor Dish Washer.
Thursday evening I contacted two movers who specialized in restaurants (which actually cost significantly more than the auction itself), due to all the stuff being listed as having to be our by end of day Friday. Then I was told the pickup window was actually only 6 hours (9 AM to 3 PM), no big deal though, hired one more mover.
Next bit of trouble came after paying for the auction, which is when they sent an exclusions list. On it there were two exclusions of concern: Dishwashers (if Eco Lab Branded) and Ice Makers in some locations. I verified the pictures of the Dishwasher, no Eco Lab branding, phew. Verified that the ice maker was not only in the list of items but also in the pictures. Figure my location must not exclude it, otherwise why show 5 pictures detailing it.
Then my team arrives. Everything is gone except for the big equipment. The televisions at the bar, the pots, pans, cleaning supplies, smallwares, blenders, mixer. The only things left was the large equipment, most of which was connected, and tables / booths.
For reference on this next parts, my bid on live auction was on Monday, this was now Friday. Two representatives were on site: The old General Manager representating Red Lobster, and a sub contractor representing the interests of the auction company.
When asked about all the missing equipment, the General Manager said they bought a large dumpster on Wednesday and all her team came in and threw everything away in the dumpster, which was already gone. Extremely unlikely, as I doubt Red Lobster would spend the money to throw away items that they're auctioning off. It got even weirder when "employees" showed up and were overheard talking about picking up items from the restaurant.
While my team leader tried to sort all of that out, the rest of my guys went to work on disassembling items. Except, Everytime they touched something (undercounter bar cooler, bar taps, booths, etc) they were told, "Oh no, that's not included," or, "Someone else already bought that."
After about 2 hours of back and forth, the on site representation finally conceded to let us take MOST of the stuff that was still there (which wasn't much). Because of the now reduced time of only 4 hours, most of the valuable stuff being gone already, and the high end items like the dishwasher and ice machine now being excluded, we only filled 2 of the 3 trucks.
I have called the auction company and apparently they said that my experience was not alone, and they were currently having a warroom on what to do next because of all the issues. They said they will likely have some solutions in how to make it right on Monday. The representative on site tried to get my team to sign a waiver of liability before leaving, but we refused.
What can I expect from this process now, and do I have any legal recourse? I would have thought that the buildings would have been secured to prevent theft while the auction was going on but obviously not. My biggest concern is that, while my costs weren't horrible at 15k, only $5500 was to the actual auction, the rest was to transportation. I certainly have concerns now that I won't be able to make my money back, let alone a profit. I know that it's a gamble, but I feel like this experience was borderline fraudulent. Any suggestions?
ETA:
If nothing else, I feel like the auction violates the law in my state (Florida), as there is a statute that covers misrepresenting facts. Specifically FSS 468.388 Subsection 11b 1 through 3 which reads:
No licensed auctioneer, apprentice, or auction business may disseminate or cause to be disseminated any advertisement or advertising which is false, deceptive, misleading, or untruthful. Any advertisement or advertising shall be deemed to be false, deceptive, misleading, or untruthful if it:
1. Contains misrepresentations of facts.
2. Is misleading or deceptive because, in its content or in the context in which it is presented, it makes only a partial disclosure of relevant facts.
3. Creates false or unjustified expectations of the services to be performed.
The auctions were listed as Entire contents, with the only exclusions listed on the auction in the terms being "Photos may show items that are not included in auction (e.g., infrastructure, HVAC, plumbing, etc."
Here's the link for anyone interested in how it was presented
https://bid.restaurantequipment.bid/Public/Auction/AuctionItemDetail?AuctionItemId=NZQh8wj3FOYwR439WdiUvw%3d%3d&AuctionId=S5YS%2bHqu8A9zcHp0d1tyMg%3d%3d&pageNumber=WddRnDis30ojx01x46RicQ%3d%3d&pageSize=WddRnDis30ojx01x46RicQ%3d%3d