Pin up weddings

Sorry if some of the stuff sounds stupid or AI-like I am not of the native tounge of English and I used one of the Google chat bots to fix up the story all the information is correct and is probably a better read anyway, just need some advice on how I should go about this weekend, I planned on staying but maybe I should leave with the kids, well act like I'm leaving and set up cameras? Ee had cameras but I took them all out after rearranging the garage years ago.
I remember it like it was yesterday, the first time I met Sarah. It was late in my freshman year of high school, and I had just made the varsity baseball team. That was a big deal for me, being the starting second baseman as a freshman. The attention and popularity came with it, but I was laser-focused on the game. Then came the charity game, where our baseball team played against the softball team to raise money for the children’s hospital. That’s where I first saw Sarah. She was the first baseman for her team, and I couldn’t deny she was beautiful. A lot of the guys on my team were talking about her, trying to get her number. But I wasn’t interested in that; I was focused on winning the game.
During the game, after I hit a single, I ended up on first base where Sarah was playing. I didn’t think much of it at the time. I didn’t acknowledge her at all, not even after the game or during the pre-game meeting to discuss the rules. Apparently, that caught her attention. She told me later that out of all the guys who tried to talk to her, I was the only one who didn’t, and that intrigued her.
A few weeks after the game, Sarah asked me to prom. She had gotten tickets from her best friend, who was a junior and didn’t want to go. I wasn’t the type to turn down a dance, so I said yes. Little did I know, that night would change everything. That night, we lost our virginity to each other, and for the rest of our freshman year and the summer, we were inseparable. We found every possible place to sneak off and be together – closets in school, secluded spots on campus, anywhere we could be alone. Sarah had a high sex drive, and I was more than happy to keep up with her.
Looking back, it was our intense physical connection and the fact that I didn’t chase her like the other guys that brought us together. Our relationship was solidified with moments like our first prom, skipping school to be together, eating at different restaurants, and getting each other promise rings that summer. And, of course, the charity game where we first met.
But it wasn’t always smooth sailing. Sarah was very popular, and a lot of guys would text her. She handled it well, always blocking numbers and reassuring me that she only wanted me. She was open and honest, even giving me her phone’s pin. She hated the idea of cheating, and she made it clear that she was committed to me. This reassurance wasn’t really needed, but it was nice to know she felt that way.
Throughout high school, we were in many of the same classes, and we excelled academically. We were partners in group projects and participated in activities together. We were inseparable, and everyone saw us as a perfect couple. Sarah came to as many of my baseball games as she could, and I attended a few of her softball games when I could. My dedication to baseball was intense, and she understood that.
Our school had a partnership with a local college, offering free tuition to students with a GPA of 3.5 or higher. I had a 4.0 GPA, which meant I had plenty of scholarship opportunities. By the time I entered college, I was making about $1,800 per semester from scholarships. Sarah and I decided to attend the same college, not wanting to be burdened with student loans. We lived comfortably during college, and I proposed to her at our graduation ceremony. It was a big deal, and our friends and family were thrilled.
After graduation, I made sure Sarah had the wedding of her dreams. I was already doing well financially, working as a lawyer specializing in insurance cases. I was the sole breadwinner for the first three years of our marriage while Sarah focused on selling items online through her flower store and completing her studies in cosmetics. She enjoyed staying at home and was very appreciative when I renovated our garage into a salon area for her business.
Around our sixth year of marriage, we decided to start a family. Our son, Isaiah, was born first, and he changed my world. Just 18 months later, our daughter, Abigail, came along. Life was good. We had financial stability, and Sarah decided she only wanted two kids after the exhausting experience of Isaiah’s birth. She had her tubes tied, and we settled into our new routine as a family of four.
Fast forward to now, Sarah and I are 35 years old, and our kids are 7 and 5. Recently, I’ve noticed some changes in Sarah’s behavior. She started leaving the kids with friends more often and coming home late. Initially, I assumed she was busy with salon appointments. But there was more to it. Our sex life, which had already slowed down, became almost non-existent. Sarah seemed upset about it, but I planned to make it up to her by spending a weekend together, just the two of us.
Then things got worse. Sarah started coming home very late, sometimes with hickeys on her neck. When I asked about them, she said they were from bee stings. I believed her at first; I’m not well-versed in gardening or bee behavior. But deep down, I knew something wasn’t right. She had always been loyal, and the thought of her cheating never crossed my mind until now.
As I pieced together these changes – the late nights, the unexplained hickeys, and her distant behavior – a feeling of unease settled in. I wanted to believe her, but the inconsistencies were becoming too hard to ignore. It was time to take a closer look at what was really happening.

Okay so I have a chapel veil (90 inches) that I'm planning on pinning under a high bun. I'm quite short in height (5'3) and will be wearing 4inch heels, making me 5'7. I love love love the way it looks when it's all spread out, but when I start walking, the veil gets all bunched up and I can't stand it. Wedding is in exactly one week. Does anyone have any advice on how to keep the veil from bunching when I walk?
I've been thinking about pinning it to the sides of my dress but idk if that's an awful idea.
Please help!

So this actually happened last weekend, but the repercussions are still unfolding, and I’m feeling more horrible as each day passes.
I was at my cousin’s wedding—a pretty big deal since it was the first family gathering after all the lockdowns. Everything was perfect: the venue, the food, the decorations. Spirits were high, and maybe that’s why I overestimated my sense of humor at the moment.
During the reception, there was an open mic for toasts. After a few drinks, feeling overly confident in my comedic timing, I decided to contribute. My "joke" was about how my cousin (the bride) had always said she'd only get married when pigs fly—and I followed up by pointing out her ex at one of the tables who used to have a pet pig. What I thought would be taken as playful ribbing absolutely wasn't.
Turns out not everyone knew about their past or his pet pig—most importantly, the groom didn’t. The room went silent; you could literally hear a pin drop. The groom got upset, thinking there were still unresolved feelings between my cousin and her ex.
The rest of the evening turned into chaos with family members taking sides, arguing about whether or not it was appropriate for her ex to even be there. My attempt at humor ended up spiraling into heated discussions about relationships and trust within our own family dynamics.
Now I’m banned from two upcoming family events and have become somewhat of a pariah. My cousin is still talking to me but says it's going to take some time for everything to calm down with her new husband. Lesson learned: Alcohol and microphones are a dangerous mix at weddings.
TLDR: Cracked a bad joke about the bride's ex at her wedding, caused a huge family drama, and got banned from family events.

hey all! i am working on a pair of cycling bloomer type pants for my upcoming wedding (one month left!!) and i am having some symmetry issues. the right pant leg has more volume than the left, and they are a bit uneven at the leg cuffs as well.
my thought is that i should replace the leg cuffs (i forgot to line them and they are kind of flimsy,) take the right leg in about an inch, and then try to gather the bottoms more evenly when i attach the new cuffs.
buttt i wanted to get a second opinion on how to fix these before i get to sewing. any ideas? i think i’ve got it figured out but i dont wanna mess these up as i dont have the time or materials to remake them.
i am not worried about finishing the waistband and closure on these as i am only wearing them once and it can be easily pinned and hidden under the bodice, so i only need advice on fixing my leg issue. thank you 🙏
the last two photos are the ones i took for reference, they show the issue pretty well

Hello everyone, I’ll be using a throwaway for this one.
I’m from Albania and work in computer science. I got married 4 years ago to a woman I was quite fond of for so long. It was a dream come true. My late mother was there for my wedding and a year into the marriage. I used to let my mother use my laptop for her shows and the news. She loved technology but often ended up accidentally locking the computer, so I decided to set her fingerprint as the password along with my pin.
A couple of months later, I was assaulted in an armed robbery and suffered injuries to my skull and spine. I was on bed rest for 8 months and felt numb. It was the lowest state I’d ever been in. My wife visited me, but I didn’t know what was going on. All I could do was nod when she spoke to me. Once I regained my health, she was there until the day I was told to go home. I waited for her for an hour before calling a cab.
When I got home, I found another man and his kids in our apartment. They said they had rented the place for 3 months. Confused, I called my landlord. He said my wife left with my mother 4 months ago, saying she was moving closer to the hospital. I called her many times but got no answer.
My cousin called and asked if I would accompany him to my mother’s grave since he just got back from his job. I almost passed out when he told me she had died two months ago. He told me my wife and in-laws had buried her. I went to the police and asked for an investigation. After a couple of days, they told me my wife had moved. My laptop was found at a tech shop after they’d sold it.
When I checked my PayPal, my balance was only $29 out of the $7,340 I had. I was heartbroken and felt like throwing up. The tech shop refused to return my laptop because my wife had unlocked it for them using my mother’s fingerprint.

LOOOONG first time trip report! 5/13-5/18, stayed at Beach Club, visited all four parks, bought Genie+ every day, had the standard DDP. Family of 4, two girls 5 and 9. I learned so much from this group over the past year and especially loved trip reports, so hopefully this post will be helpful to someone!
💲BUDGET💲
-- I booked the trip a year out so I could break it up into 12 manageable payments. I opened the no fee Disney VISA, which gives you several months of no interest on charges made towards Disney travel packages, rewards dollars to use at Disney, and a couple other perks like character meet and greets and discounts.
-- I signed up for Disney Movie Insiders. This is what you're supposed to do with all those little codes that come in Disney DVDs/Blurays. You enter the codes in exchange for points, and at 1000 points, you can redeem for a $10 Disney gift card. You also get points for being subscribed to Disney+, seeing Disney movies in the theater, their social media accounts, and a whole bunch of other things. I got $50 in gift cards from this alone.
-- If you want Disney-themed luggage, try thinking outside the box to save money! I got plain luggage in Mickey colors--red and black--and Mickey luggage tags to make them Disney themed.
-- I tried to budget for souvenirs via gift cards... but I failed, lol. Everything is so expensive, $100 is gone in a second. Plushes are like $40, coffee cups are $20, etc. Whatever you're planning to spend, double it! I get what people say about most shops having the same stuff, but it's definitely not all of them, most of the ones post-ride have unique stuff. And honestly it's kind of nice most of them have the same stuff, if you want to get whatever your kid was asking for earlier, you don't have to walk all the way back to the one shop you saw it at.
-- We paid for Memory Maker and I'm on the fence about it. On the one hand, it's really nice to get all the ride photos and meet and greet photos and magic shots. It's also really nice for the whole family to be in a lot of pictures and not have to swap with the other adult or find someone willing to take your picture. On the other, we definitely didn't utilize it as much as I wanted to because a lot of the photographers had pretty long lines and I just didn't want to spend time waiting for a picture I could take myself. If we came across someone with a shortish or no line, we made sure to get it, but for anyone with a long line, we just stood around the same spot and took our own.
🗓️PLANNING🗓️
-- If you have kids and live within easy driving distance of another amusement park, highly recommend making a visit BEFORE going to Disney to get an idea of how they handle that kind of day/environment, especially if they have never been. I quickly discovered we would absolutely need a stroller and I would need to be militant with the kids about staying hydrated. Also to avoid face paint, as heat + tears + paint + eyes = bad day! I felt so much better making these discoveries beforehand and being able to prepare accordingly, rather than making them at Disney.
-- USE AN AGENT! An agent is free to you, so why not have the help? Ours was amazing, she gave us quotes, booked the package, rebooked as needed later when a better deal came out, made all the payments, dining and extra reservations, and was just all-around awesome to work with. It was such a load off to know I wasn't on my own with all this stuff.
-- Watch everything Ear Scouts. No one explains Genie+ better, and Rob and Erick's videos are just so positive and beautiful and well done.
-- I also enjoyed reading Disney Tourist Blog--lovingly snarky but super informative!--and Disney Food Blog for fun tips and news.
-- I didn't find any park to be a half day park, we filled our whole day in every one and still didn't see everything!
-- My kids did really well, whenever they were on the verge of cranky, we had one ride in the stroller for a while, bought a snack (usually ice cream or popcorn), and used the bubble wand, and/or gave them some ibuprofen, and everyone felt better pretty quick. We never tried to do fireworks, we were all done by 8 so always left after dinner. The only park we closed down was EPCOT because we didn't get out of dinner until after close, and that was a really cool experience, the park was so quiet and empty and beautiful!
-- You don't NEED a Magic Band... but man, was it convenient. We just had 1.0 Magic Bands though, we didn't bother with the 2.0s.
-- I guess moving through security fast is important to people rope dropping... but as someone who didn't, it added like maybe 30 seconds to a minute to the experience the couple times my bag got flagged, it's really not a big deal.
-- I'm not saying anyone's lying about bad experiences or exaggerating or anything, but try to remember that far more people go on the Internet to complain than they do to praise. I got so stressed about all the things that could go wrong, and we had a pretty much perfect trip. The only attraction that broke down on us was Muppetvision, of all things. The only "bad behavior" we witnessed was the morning we were leaving, we could hear a dad across the hall yelling at his family, I think they overslept and were going to miss their flight or something? We just turned the TV on so we didn't have to hear him. A couple times we forgot to take our stuff with us when we parked our stroller or forgot some food in it, and neither people nor animals bothered it. The only dicey thing that happened to us was me dropping my phone into the Dumbo moat, the cast members fished it out and it still worked, I sent them a cast compliment for all their help! All the cast members were great, I'm not really sure what people expect but IMO they all do amazing for having to be peppy and helpful all day in absolutely blazing heat, walking a ride conveyer belt nonstop, repeating the same spiels over and over, meeting person after person, etc. I wouldn't last a 2 hour shift let alone 8. Cast members, you rock!!!
✈️TRAVEL✈️
-- We flew Delta, flight there was flawless, flight home was delayed by an hour waiting for crew and was a little bumpy (which is not great for a nervous flyer like me) but otherwise fine.
-- Get TSA PreCheck! Good for a few years, if the adults have it the kids have it too. It made the whole experience so much easier. That said, even PreCheck still moves kind of slow at MCO, so definitely get there at least 2 hours early for your flight. Use curbside check-in for bags, way faster than the long line inside!
-- On our agent's recommendation, we used Away We Go for ground transport in Orlando. They communicate really well, both ways were flawless, no complaints!
-- We used Minnie Vans to get to Animal Kingdom + Sanaa and Magic Kingdom, what a wonderful service! Definitely pricey, but they had cartoons on in the car, booster seats they set up for you, and the drivers were so nice and friendly and had fun trivia to share. I never had any problem requesting one when I needed it.
⛱️BEACH CLUB⛱️
-- We knew we wanted an onsite hotel where you could walk to at least one park. This pretty much limits you to a handful of Deluxe hotels or the Swan and Dolphin. Beach Club won for us because it's "in the Disney bubble" and you can walk to 2/4 parks. Note that while you can technically walk to Hollywood Studios, it is a LOOOONG walk. The boat is a nice not crowded alternative! We did not make use of Early Entry or Extended Hours, we're just not built for either. Beach Club was lovely, we booked a resort view but I think we ended up with a water view, we were right by the quiet pool and could see the water beyond from our room. Stormalong Bay was a little crazy for us but we loved the quiet pool. Best thing about Beach Club though is the location, EPCOT is literally steps away!
🌳ANIMAL KINGDOM🌳
-- We had read that there's really no bad day to do AK, so we started there. We rode: Navi River Journey, Flight of Passage, Kali River Rapids, Everest, Kilimanjaro Safaris, Triceratops Spin, and Dinosaur--so pretty much everything! With Genie+ we walked onto all of them. We also met Moana, Pocahontas, and Russell! The only thing we didn't do here that we wanted to was the Gorilla Falls trail, but we just ran out of time before the park closed.
🌐EPCOT🌐
-- We had read to avoid EPCOT on Fridays and Saturdays, so we went on Wednesday. We rode: Grand Fiesta Tour, Living with the Land, Nemo, Spaceship Earth, Imagination with Figment, Frozen, Remy, Journey of Water, and Guardians--everything we wanted! Again, with Genie+, we walked right onto everything! Outside of our character meal (more on that in the dining section!), we also met Anna, Elsa, and Asha! Tried a couple of Flower and Garden snacks: chicken and waffles, fruit and cheese strudel, and potato pancakes, all were delicious! Everyone had a different favorite day, but EPCOT was personally my favorite day, it felt like we were firing on all cylinders and the day just went really smoothly!
🏰MAGIC KINGDOM🏰
-- We had read that Wednesdays were the quietest days at MK, so we were originally going to try to do it that day, but we could only get a reservation for Cinderella's Royal Table on Thursday, so we switched it up. Definitely the most crowded of all the parks we visited, but I think that's just the norm for MK, everyone wants to go to the castle park with the most rides. We rode: Regal Carousel, Tomorrowland Speedway, Barnstormer, Magic Carpets, Mad Tea Party, People Mover, Dumbo, Small World, Little Mermaid, Pirates, Space Ranger Spin, Jungle Cruise, TRON, and Peter Pan. Again, with Genie+, we walked right onto everything! The only ride we missed at this park that we wanted to do was Pooh, I couldn't manage to get a return time that was earlier than we planned on leaving. Outside of our character meals (more on those in the dining section!) we also met Mirabel, Tiana, and Rapunzel! We had both the Rapunzel and Aurora ice creams, both so good and cute!
🎬HOLLYWOOD STUDIOS🎬
-- We had read that, like MK, it's better to do HS later in the week, so we went Friday. We rode: Slinky, Alien Saucers, Toy Story Mania, Rise, Smuggler's Run, Runaway Railway. Again, with Genie+, we walked right onto everything! The only ride we missed was Tower of Terror, again I couldn't manage to get a return time that was earlier than we planned on leaving. We also met Olaf, be aware Olaf doesn't sign stuff, they just give you a signature card. This park needs more shade IMO, especially Toy Story Land, I know it's supposed to be Andy's backyard, but I don't see why that means we can't have some shade from trees or something. 🤪 Blue milk from Galaxy's Edge was really good, the family was all fighting over it!
🍽️DINING🍽️
-- We almost certainly lost some money on the DDP, but I'm still glad we got it because it allowed us to do more table service meals and have less stress overall about expenses. We easily used up everything but child quick service credits, we had a few of those left over near the end.
Here's where we ate!
BOARDWALK DELI/PIZZA WINDOW: Pizza for the kids, sandwiches for the adults. Tasty and satisfying after our day of travel!
BEACHES AND CREAM: Got the kitchen sink for the experience, but honestly it's not great, all the ice cream and toppings melt together quick and you just end up with weird ice cream soup.
SAT'ULI CANTEEN: LOVED this place, everything was so yummy! Best quick service we had!
SANAA: Since Animal Kingdom closes so early, we thought we'd try to extend the experience by eating at Sanaa. What a great idea, we got seated right by a window and saw so many animals! The food was great too.
AKERSHUS: Our favorite princess meal! We met Aurora, Tiana, Snow White, Ariel, and Belle. They were all lovely, and the breakfast was really good too. Only 1 credit on the DDP!
GARDEN GRILL: Our kids really enjoyed getting to look down over Living with the Land and the fact that the restaurant spins. We met Farmer Mickey, Pluto, and Chip and Dale. They were fun and even came to our table more than once. Food was good!
SPACE 220: Not on the DDP, but wow, what a cool restaurant! Almost like a ride with the theming and the elevator up. Food was really good.
CINDERELLA'S ROYAL TABLE: You gotta eat in the castle! We paid for it OOP because we didn't want to use up 2 DDP credits here. You're really going for the location and the princesses, the food is kinda meh, not bad but not as good as other places. The restaurant is small and they have to turn tables quick, so it's very understandable to me that the princesses have to move fast. It's not that they rush you, they'll take all the pictures you ask for and sign whatever and answer your questions, but if you don't have much you need, they try to keep moving. Akershus is much bigger so they are able to be more relaxed there. The only small bummer is that we didn't see Merida (maybe she was on vacation too!) We did meet Cinderella, Ariel, Jasmine, and Aurora though!
CRYSTAL PALACE: We are not big on buffets but we enjoyed meeting Pooh, Piglet, Eeyore and Tigger!
TOPOLINO'S: Maybe the best food of the trip, steak and eggs were so good! The character artist costumes are so cute too. It was fun to have an excuse to ride the Skyliner to get here from Beach Club too.
DOCKING BAY 7: The theming is great, but the food wasn't as good as Satuli Canteen IMO.
THE MARKET AT ALE & COMPASS: We had quick service credits we wanted to use up on the last day and we didn't want to leave the resort again, otherwise I would have gone somewhere else, food was meh.
✨EXTRAS✨
-- I originally wanted to book Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique for my kids, but it's so expensive/competitive that I decided I didn't want the stress. Instead I booked Have Wand, Will Travel to come to our room and bought dresses from Presley Couture and Only Little Once. I chose Have Wand, Will Travel because they keep character throughout. Fairy Godmother Elyse was amazing and so much fun, my kids loved it and kept talking about it all day!
-- That same morning I ordered a Sammicakes breakfast box with beignets for us to eat. I also ordered a pretend letter from The DCP and Me on Etsy to make it seem like the breakfast came from Tiana. My kids also loved this and had fun telling Tiana about it both times we met her. Sammicakes was good but a LOT of food, sadly we didn't end up eating half of it. It can last you at least 3 days!
-- We had Birthdays and More decorate our door, it was a really fun surprise for the kids on our first day and made our room easy to find. The kids also loved reusing the decorations at home on their own doors!
-- Matching shirts and ear hats, all from Etsy! So many cool designs there, hardest part is choosing!
-- Got my kids a pin trading lanyard with some pins, they loooooved pin trading! It was like free souvenirs.
🧳PACKING🧳
-- Things the Internet Told Me to Pack That I Needed: Scissors, ziploc bags, ibuprofen (kids and adults), garbage bags, big carabiners to hook on the strolleuse to carry multiple bags at once.
-- Things the Internet Told Me to Pack that I Didn't Need: stainless steel straws (the paper straws are more like hard cardboard, they really don't break down unless your kid is gnawing on them or something), ponchos (it did rain some most days, but wearing a poncho was almost more miserable than not wearing one, it's so hot and humid to be walking around in a plastic bag! We did better taking shelter and using umbrellas.), wipes (obv you need them if your kid is younger, but mine were older and just never got messy enough to need them), glow sticks (we never stayed anywhere long enough to use them), bottled wateLiquid IV (the tap water tasted the same as home to us, but we live in a rural area so maybe we are just used to imperfect water?) Basically, the less you can get away carrying in the parks, the better. It's annoying to lug stuff around you don't end up needing or using!
🛞STROLLER🛞
-- I know it seems insane that your 5 year old and 9 year old will need a stroller, but mine definitely did. Once I accepted that I was going to have to get one, I tried to make the best of it, and actually got really into decorating it so we could always easily spot it in the sea (the decorations also later made nice wall decor for a gallery of our trip!) The Magic Spotter flag was the best investment, hardly anyone had them so it was easy to instantly spot our stroller anywhere we left it, even if it got moved. That said, I definitely didn't want to spend a lot on a stroller we were really only buying for this one trip, so I got a used Joovy Caboose on Facebook Marketplace for $50. It was very hard to handle with two older kids in it, and even with one it was hard to handle unless the kid was in the back seat. So we basically used it like a single stroller, glad I didn't spend a lot on it since it was so hard to drive!
☔WEATHER☔
-- We had mostly great weather, it rained some every day except Magic Kingdom day but it passed within an hour each time. We wore socks with Crocs so that if/when it rained, we could just take our wet socks off and walk in our Crocs, this worked great! Don't trust the weather reports though, two days it wasn't supposed to rain. One day it actually didn't, the other day it did and we had to walk in wet shoes because we didn't wear the Crocs that day. Just figure it might rain any day and be prepared! See above note RE: ponchos being not great and shelter + umbrellas being better. When it didn't rain, It. Was. Hot. 🥵 In the 90s but definitely felt hotter with the humidity making it so sticky. We felt there was plenty of shade at Animal Kingdom and EPCOT, but hardly any at Magic Kingdom and Hollywood Studios, which I would say slightly affected how much fun we had on those days comparatively.
Phew! That's about it, let me know if you have any questions!

I (27F) have an older brother, 33M. We didn't get along very much as kids due to the age gap, not for my lack of trying. I never really understood why my brother didn't really like spending time with me, because he was one of my favorite people in the world, despite all his bullying.
For context, I'll give some examples of what my brother has done to me over the years with some vague age ranges of when they occurred.
When I was about 3, my brother convinced me that red was orange and orange was red because I was learning my colors in preschool. He also used to steal food like tater tots off my little high chair tray and would pretend he didn't do anything when my mom checked on why I was crying (I was NOT a fussy baby/toddler, so it set off alarm bells when I did.)
I think when I was 4 or 5, my brother came into my room after I had already been put to bed, and he woke me up. Thing is, he was hovering over me with a scary mask on, only the hallway light, and a butterknife. Not sure I really have to explain why that was traumatic. I'm still afraid of masks to this day.
When I was around 10-12, my brother kept drinking all the milk or kool aid that I would make and never replenish/remake it. I told him to stop, he wouldn't, of course. My mom was fostering other children and didn't have time for squabbles like this. So I very visibly spit on top of the kool aid pitcher and left the lid off so it was seen. What does my (reminder, 17-19) brother do? He wrenches the bowl of cereal I'm currently eating out of my hands, spits in it, and shoves it back at me hard enough that it spilled all over me. Now, I'm not an angry person. I'm not a violent person. But I was still a child and fed up with being bullied by someone who was/almost an adult. I never tried getting physical before because I was so much smaller, but I hit puberty kind of early. So I splashed the bowl back at him to see how he liked it. He threw me to the ground and hit me. My mom had to break us up and told us we were both to blame, so he didn't even get punished.
Several times, he would turn the lights off on me when I was on the other side of the room in the basement away from the switch, because I was afraid of the dark for a very long time.
We had Sonic Adventure 2 we shared. If we ever fought about something, or I reminded him it was my turn, he threatened to say goodbye forever to my chao. I am extremely soft hearted so that accomplished what he wanted.
Sometimes I would notice my things go missing. I had assumed maybe my mom put them away somewhere and forgot, but I'm pretty sure I know what happened to them. Especially gamecube games-- Those discs were tiny! He was pawning them for drug and booze money. One time he was drunk and admitted he had been selling his adderall for other drugs. That came to a head one terrible Christmas Eve. Brother was home for the holiday and I'm not very clear on what events led up to it, but my parents caught my brother in the bathroom with a baggie of various drugs that he was already doing. He insisted it was just weed, but my parents didn't believe that. I wouldn't know, I only briefly saw the bag, but it was full of both a large green ball of like leaves and lots of white powder. It was a vicious screaming match for a few hours. I hid out in my room on a different floor and played a video game as loud as I could so I didn't have to hear my family. The screams died down after a while, and I cautiously went out of my room. My brother had left the house for a while. I had a few holiday assignments and decided to just crank them out while my family cooled off, and I did it at the dining room table because that's where our Christmas tree was too and I desperately needed that good cheer magic. I was quietly writing, not saying anything, not making much noise, when my brother came back in the house. He stopped off at the kitchen for something and muttered something rude and belittling to me. At this point I'm a preeten-early teen and he had already ruined the day that had always been magical to me before, as my grandma used to stay over with us on Christmas Eve. She had died rather recently at the time. And I can't tell you exactly what I said. I think I've blocked out as much as I can. I made some snide remark, something like 'at least I don't do drugs' and in the next second I was yanked out of my chair. My brother picked me up by the neck and slammed me against the wall. I know I clawed and kicked against the wall as hard as I could. I blacked out, and I woke up on the floor with my parents absolutely screaming at him that he could have killed me. As a side note to the whole ordeal, he never apologized, and it's made my adult life a lot harder as weed becomes more and more commonplace. Just the thought of it used to send me in a panic attack, I could feel the hands choking me again. I've gotten better about dealing with it, but I still refuse to have it in any part of my life whatsoever. It's cost me a few relationships.
When I was in college, my brother had moved back in with me and my parents because his girlfriend dumped him for being a piece of shit that worked at walmart and did nothing but drink all day despite having a state paid scholarship, that he wasted, because he couldn't keep his GPA above 2.8. He was a music major. The classes he took were things like 'History of Jimi Hendrix' and 'The Beatles'. He just partied too much to even attend class. He took the dog they got with him, not at all prepared for her. The dog is a high energy breed that is difficult to train, and we had two small 5-10 pound dogs at home. At 1 year old, bro's dog was about 30 pounds. He often left for several hours during summers/breaks when I was home, without telling anyone, knowing that I would either hear the dog cry if he crated them and feel bad and let them out or that I wouldn't banish them to a crate if they were already in a room with me. The dog bullied our other dogs and bit at everyone. Dog was incredibly overly protective of my brother-- Trait of the breed. I was back at college for a few months and had spent a good month mourning the loss of a 5 year relationship. I never really heard anything from him. Then out of the blue, my brother asks me if I can let him and dog stay for the night (we live 2 hours from the college) because my mom had kicked him out. The dog had bit her and she snapped at my brother to control his f'ing dog and he responded by calling her, the woman who birthed him, payed for his other college costs, paid back loans he promised to pay to other family members, never charged him rent, and he called her a f'ing female dog. She snapped. While I agree that my mom was completely in the right to do that, I have too soft of a heart to just leave him with nowhere to go. He promised it was just a night so he could get in touch with some friends closer to home and figure shit out. I let him come to me.
I really regret that decision.
At the time I had a new roommate (she was very nice though, I liked her) and a sort of FWB who doted on me for a little while. I texted FWB and asked if he could bring some alcohol by-- I was still 19 at the time, underage to buy it, but FWB was old enough and agreed the man could probably do with a drink. We stayed out on our little porch area to make sure that we wouldn't be disturbing my roomie in any way while we socialized. My brother got really wasted. He told me terrible things about our deceased grandmother (who he knew I had really loved growing up, and had no idea about who she really was because she had always loved me). And he laughed. He laughed when he saw the discomfort on my face. My FWB was feeling pretty bad for me and suggested we go to bed because it was also like 3 in the morning and both of us had class in the morning, so we go inside. The apartment has a shared common room/living room, little kitchen area, and laundry closet. My bedroom is on one side and roomie's was on the other-- Both bathrooms are also ensuite to the bedroom. So I went in and changed out of my clothes into something comfier to sleep in and crawled into my bed, letting my brother do his own thing in the bathroom. I'm just trying to rest and suddenly my brother is pulling me out of my bed and dragging me out of my own room. He's yelling that he's taking my bed, did I really expect him to take the couch? And I'm not very confrontational. I'm flustered, tired, and honestly a little afraid after the neck choke incident. FWB steps in like a hero and tries to calmly explain that its my bed, and I will sleep in it, I have been kind enough to let him stay and he should not be so ungrateful. Brother fucking loses his mind. Starts screaming his head off about how selfish I am and how reliant I am on our parents and won't be able to do anything on my own as an adult (I was financially dependent on my parents at 19 while in college, shocker). He starts drunkenly trying to pick up his dog's toys and searching for his keys, and both FWB and I step in and tell him he can't go driving like this, after like half a bottle of fireball. He at least needs to sober up before he can drive. I stand in front of the front door, as my brother is still searching for his keys, and there is no way I'm letting him out of here right now. Brother has found his keys, and starts pulling at me and hurting me. Lucky for me, FWB had been a pretty good wrestler in highschool. He got my brother pinned down and I snatched the keys, hiding over by the sink in case I had to throw them in there. He's screaming his head off and my poor roommate comes out and asks what the hell is going on because she knows I'm very quiet and tend to keep visitors in my room. I'm like half sobbing trying to explain and the FWB, still pinning my brother, tells her that we're trying to keep him from drunk driving. My roommate does not play around with that. She was in nursing school, and had recently lost a friend to a drunk driver. I don't know how it worked, but she put on her stern nurse tone and told my brother that he was free to leave when he sobered up, or she herself would be calling the cops on him, and both me and FWB could press additional charges for assault. He reluctantly agreed to this condition and FWB let him off the floor, but sat in front of the front door just in case. When he was sobered up, he left, saying 'I hope you like mom and dad, because I'm not your family anymore'.
And that was devastating. I couldn't stop crying. My FWB went back to bed with me and laid me down in bed and let me cry until I passed out. He skipped his class that day to be there for me. I know I don't paint a good picture of my brother, but I did/do love him. I thought now that we were older that he'd mellowed out and we could be good friends like I always wanted. I mean, I made like 300 fake facebook accounts back in the day to vote for his band to be a headliner at a large concert. Just a few years prior when he was home on a break he introduced me to a TV show we binged and he let my lay on his shoulder. (I was/am very touch starved but paralyzed by fear that I'm annoying the other person, and all my friends were made later in life and are states away). When Pokemon Go came out we would take late night drives around quiet places of town while hunting pokemon together. We traded off the controller on online battlefield games and compared scores and the most ridiculous deaths. I really thought that he loved me too, finally, after years of resentment.
He didn't speak to me for 2 years. I didn't find out until later, but my parents lied for him on my behalf that he still loved me and was just annoyed, and gave me birthday/christmas presents that they told me had been from him, just that he was working. I really treasured those objects when I didn't know the truth about them. I got a really stupid mug with the first letter of my name on it in pink and zebra print (two things I don't really enjoy) but I used that thing every single day.
So, these are glimpses into my previous relationship with my brother. I don't really remember when he started speaking to me again, but I sure know he never apologized. He had finally hit rock bottom and asked my father to put in a good word for him at (insert facility with decent pay and good benefits but hard work), which he had previously rejected by telling my parents that it was a shit job. My brother's name got put closer to the top of the resumes. He got in. It wasn't easy work, or comfy sometimes, but it paid well enough to endure that, I guess. My brother used to be rather athletic.
Between the cut off point and then, my brother had worked at a (also generic job) a town or two over and hated the commute. He also happened to find a girlfriend with an apartment sort of close by. She didn't like having him over because of his dog, and almost never let him do any overnight. But now that my brother had a better paying job, she was willing to move in with him, of course. My brother bought a house in our home town and she came with it. She pays a ridiculously low amount of rent to my brother.
If she was home and brother wasn't, the dog stayed crated up because she didn't want to deal with it. Both of them worked, but her job isn't at all difficult. And yet somehow, sometimes pulling doubles, my brother ended up doing most of everything. My brother, who didn't learn to do his laundry until his 20s, ate pizza every single day, and had left used condoms on the floor of his bedroom in our parents house when he left. He did most of the cooking because she says she's bad at it. But will make pies for her mom. When the holidays came around, instead of discussing or rotating, they will always go to her family first. If my brother can come to ours at all. He often misses entire occassions (we don't go out big, but like, cmon. Hand your dad the gift card on his birthday at least, not 2 weeks later).
I also used to get to hangout or see my brother sometimes. Maybe once every few weeks, and it was fun! It was the friendship I had always dreamt of. Now I can't even get him to do anything online with me from the comfort of his own home. I don't have a single text from him this year past 1/27.
At first, we all understood. She was quirky. I was quirky. We share several similar traits and interests. I used to like that and be excited to have a family member like me, but now I dread the day she becomes family.
Let's start with the smoking car. Me and my parents were driving near his street so we could cut through to the highway, and out of nowhere, black smoke starts coming from the hood. My father tells me and my mom to get out and he'll get it to my brother's and out of the road to look at it and see what was going on. This was like.... early August. It was very hot outside. Since I've 'been in the house before' and 'know what it's like' I am 'allowed' to come into my brother's house to cool off. But GF refuses letting in either of them, referring to the messy state of the house. Which, okay, fair-- But its HER messes. My brother cleans up after her. I learned later that GF snapped at him about his family always coming over unannounced and how she has to hurry to put on a bra and everything is messy and we can't just drop in its rude! She says, as her mother and brother do the exact same thing, in a house she doesn't own. But my family let it be water under the bridge for now. My brother called me a f'in a'hole for telling my mom about the conversation. Because my mom was livid.
The next thing is my father. My dad's family has a pretty big history of strokes and heart attacks, and he's had one heart attack. My dad had been in pain all day and he finally gave up at about 3AM and woke my mom up to drive him to the hospital. I don't have a license at this point, so there's little that I can do. My mom says the surgery he probably needs isn't even done here and they're transferring him, my mom asked me to keep my brother in the loop. So I told him about this and about the time they would reach the hospital, because my mom dad gran and I share locations. I asked if he would take me up, I had a bag full of things that might make him more comfortable or less stressed. The hospital they're taking our dad to is a little over an hour away. Everyone is more or less frantic. My brother is talking to work for him, I'm making sure that for however many hours that our pets will be okay and talking to my mom's work. We drive there and nothing major happens, but it was so... Uncomfortable? Tense. The thing that's hurting my dad is a blocked or enlarged blood vessel that cuts off oxygen to the tissue around it, which, cells die, and you really need your colon, the area my dad has an issue with. The thing is, until they can do the surgery, it was like he was a ticking time bomb. My brother takes me home when visitor hours are over and I hold my dogs tight. The next day is filled with lots of pricks pokes and prods at my dad so we don't go that day. We do go the day after, Friday. My brother's GF is in the truck with him. I'm not really paying attention to much of anything because for all we know my dad could die before we got there. Brothers' GF goes to get some snacks from the long drive and the fact that she's not exactly family yet. My brother, mom and I rotate who is away in the cafe and eating with GF. I see GF and my brother whispering angrily at each other. She's tugging at his arm. I manage to pick up 'We're going to miss my mom's dinner!" And I am just stunned. Her mother has a small family dinner every single friday and makes meatloaf. His GF wanted us to head back from our critical father, because she didn't want to miss a weekly event. And I really have to hand it to my brother for not snapping right then and there. He waited until we were in his truck and out of the hospital parking lot and says "How in the f'ck do you say something to me like that? Like, for real, wtf!" GF starts crying and says its a family tradition and her mom is all she has left-- False. She has her mom, sister, and brother, at least. Her father died in a car incident that hospitalized her as a kid. So my brother snaps again like 'are you seriously telling me you value a f'ing loaf of meat over a life? we have no idea what will happen, my dad could die within the hour and i'm not there, he could die tomorrow, how long d-" And GF cuts him off wailing that her dad is dead. Which, yes, is a horrifyingly traumatic experience. But she does not get to play the 'my dad is dead' card ten years after the fact, to justify leaving our possibly dying father before visiting hours ended. She tried to emotionally blackmail my brother by apologizing to me through tears that this must be so hard for me but honestly I was doing my best to block it out, staring at pictures of dogs in hammocks. I shared my brother's sentiment.
But wait, there's more! Remember that car accident GF had years ago? You would think that, if nothing else, she would be empathetic for someone/their family in a car crash? You'd be wrong! I was rear ended at 60 mph right in front of my house after coming home from work (the ambulance took me straight back to work lmao). The physical damage to me was pretty minimal, bruises and a sprained ankle because my foot was pressed on the brake, waiting for an opportunity to cross into the driveway. This was late October 2020. Covid regulations were pretty strict. So I was alone in a room for a while and in pain. My parents had followed the ambulance. My dad had actually heard the crash and went 'huh she usually comes home now' and runs over after seeing the wreckage. My parents had the crash footage, grainy, but there thanks to the cameras set up outside our house. I hadn't realized it by that point but I had a pretty good concussion, and I was hurt, and scared. I was texting my mom constantly but my dad had left his phone at home in the rush to get my mom and she hadn't charged her phone, they'd been in the parking lot for like an hour and a half already. They promised me they'd be back soon, they'll just pop in and let my brother know since he lives nearby. My parents didn't even ask to like, stay and sit with them instead of a cold car. My mom asked to pee and to borrow a charging cable (they had one, GF has the same model phone) given the, you know, situation. My brother barely cracked the door to speak with them. He said no, because GF was uncomfortable, because they were waiting for their second negative test to come in. Read that again. They had tested negative. It's not like my mom would go near anyone to the bathroom either-- The back door that's used more often is literally inches away from the bathroom door. My brother didn't even try to argue with his GF about his own home and some empathy for someone else dealing with a car crash. It absolutely disgusted my parents. And later on brother told me he got another earful about our parents just dropping in without notice and its like? Excuse me? Its his house!
Unfortunately, a tire popped on my parents' car when we were nearby. It was like, 3 years since the first issue with the car. I went inside and asked my brother to let my mom in because its raining. GF did not like that, and didn't realize I could overhear her down the hall, arguing with my brother and his family again. I went over the next day to my brother and he was actively cleaning up GF's mess so it wouldn't be as 'embarassing' for her. I sat him down and talked to him as realistically as I could. I have depression, anxiety, emotional abuse trauma, agorophobia, and very few friends. But I'm okay. He started very quietly expressing his frustration towards GF. She doesn't do much around the house or contribute financially, lets her family over but not his, him doing most of the cooking despite regularly pulling 12s. I sat there calmly, because of course I knew this. This is what makes the situation somewhat even more sticky. I asked my brother, "Do you actually love someone like that? Or are you afraid to be alone?" He's been in one relationship or another for most of my life. Lately he had been confiding in me about how bad his mental health was falling and I was like 'that's not a slump, that's. that's depression.' So when I asked my brother the question, he hesitated. That spoke loudly enough in my opinion. But then I also saw my brother's face crumpling as he admitted he just didn't want to be alone. GF wants babies but my brother knows with her medical history and condition on top of being so lazy and bluntly told me she would not be a good mother and hopes to God that day doesn't come. He is so unhappy being with her. We both heard the rustling of a comforter and my brother lowered his panicky voice and asked me to leave so she doesn't see me here. That is incredibly messed up, especially since its his name on the house. I haven't seen my brother at his house since then, and that was over 2 years ago.
During COVID, GF started working from home, and it stayed that way. My brother still takes care of most things.
In the mean time, he's proposed to her. Yeah. I managed to save things when all our faces dropped at the Christmas dinner he announced their engagement at. My brother calls her by a nickname that was also the name of a beloved family dog that had passed away only one month ago. My dad and my reactions at that time were genuine confusion and sadness about him bringing up our passed pet. Everything was pretty quiet after that. When we got home, I texted my brother and told him that hearing our dog's name in conversation after losing her so recently shattered us, be we were, in fact, happy for his engagement.
I lied.
None of us want him to marry her. I dread the day that I get a wedding invitation or GF shows up pregnant. She would be a terrible mother. My brother is aware of the fact that my parents think she's a rude, inconsiderate brat that only thinks of herself, from that earlier conversation that I talked to my parents about. My mom snapped that they don't have to like her, all they were required to do was be civil, and we are, so shut up.
At larger family functions GF tends to gravitate around me. Like I said, we have similar interests and personalities. And I have never told her to get lost or had it in me to upfront tell her we don't like her. I am absolutely horrible at confrontation, but my patience is wearing thin.
Last year my parents set up brunch for Mother's Day. We were at the table when my brother called and said they were going to urgent care because GF had another one of her migraines that make her vomit. Which, she takes medicine and has injectable solutions. Some situation always comes up with her right before my brother would come to us.
My parents tried again with the Mother's Day brunch last week. On the day of, he said that he was too tired to come, can we try next week? Please insert the eyeroll of the century.
Because of our clear dislike, my brother doesn't often bring his GF around anymore on the offchance she lets him. It occurred to me that my parents planned the same brunch as last year, and I was dreading my question. "Is GF coming with us for brunch?" They don't know. All my brother did was confirm the time and place. The thought of having to deal with her in the morning and pretend that I don't see her for what she is, is already exhausting me. I can barely get my brother to even play online with me. I feel like this has been festering long enough that at some point, its all going to overflow at once. But I am absolutely disgusted by how she takes advantage of my brother's fear of being alone and how the world revolves around her.
I had a dream the other day, actually, it was a good dream. I was at their wedding, and the priest guy said the standard 'speak now or hold your peace' and I stood up and loudly shouted OBJECTION! Every single person in the room turned to look at me, one because I don't raise my voice like that, two my patience is vast, and three, to upset me to this level of shouldering my anxiety by making a spectacle of myself. I then explained every detail, especially how much she was charged for rent, that my brother admitted he wasn't happy, and I wanted better for him than to just be an ATM maid.
If I bring this up to my brother again, I may lose him forever. But if I don't, he may be miserable together. And on the third side-- Do I actually really want my brothers' friendship at this point? Like, I'm definitely fed up dealing with his GF like she is. Plus, I pointed out and reiterated to him before that he admitted he wasn't happy.
I am very, very quiet by default. Never got into much trouble. I was and still am a gentle soul at my core being. If things get to a point where I cross lines of polite manners and call someone out on their bs, people around know that someone did something almost unforgivable. I'm wondering if my brother would know that.
TLDR; Brother's fiancee is disliked for good reason. My brother has isolated. I miss him, but also never want to see him again. I want to remind him that this marriage isn't a good idea, but I don't want to antagonize him.

Hi all
wondering how you’ve switched to 2x weekly injections for oz
did you wait for the current week to fully lapse then pin 1/2 ? Or did you pin a bit earlier to let it build up.
i am on 1mg and pin Wednesdays. Basically Wed appetite is back to normal. And full kick in (w nausea and total suppresion) doesn’t happen until Fridays.
im T2D. It’s done a great job at BG control for me third month in. Still take my insulin’s tho but less and I have less spikes. But at 1mg I’m eating at maintenance and not a huge deficit. 200 cal at best. With MJ last year I could run 1k cal deficit no problem but now if I’m running it somehow at the end of the day I end up eating the 1k+ calories. I am gurssing that I’ll need to up it to 2mg. Second week of 1mg and I have one 1mg refill. May ask doc for 2mg sooner. Ie to take after this 1mg pen
sorry for a bit off topic. Mainly curious at best way to switch to 2x per week.

Groaning awake, panic twisted my features at the sight of Marcus slumbering peacefully next to me. Flying off the bed, the sound of me hitting the floor had him snapping awake. Patting the bed, a tender blush painted my cheeks at him grinning flirtatiously in my direction. Seconds from reprimanding him, the door blew open. Tarot bounced over to me, a tarot card flipping through his fingers. Flashing a bemused grin, he flicked the card into my palm. Of course, he had to dance his way in. When was he going to stop being such a child?
“First job and you might like it. We have an unknown killer in the seventies. We have intel that they are meeting with Glanda.” He explained with a wink, confusion twisting my features. “Glanda Kills the witch we are dealing with. Prevent their meeting and you get to put another serial killer on the map. Your disguises are on the door. Have fun, my lovely weirdos.” Floating out in a scarlet velvet suit, pale blue bell bottoms and a green floral disco shirt had me rolling my eyes. Popping to my feet, Marcus looked less impressed with his navy bell bottoms and a cheesy blue and white button up shirt. Low growls rumbled in my throat, my fingers dancing along the material. Excusing myself to give my hair the Farrah Fawcett treatment, the hair curler worked overtime to give me the perfect bouncy flips and curls. Flipping through the makeup bag, the correct pallet greeted me. Painting my face the best I could, the bold lines contrasted wonderfully with the blue. Coming out to get dressed, Marcus looked miserable in his outfit. Fussing with the colorful material, a fit of laughter burst from his lips at my hair and makeup. Flipping him off as I tugged on my modern undergarments, he turned his back as I tugged on the denim bell bottoms. Tying the front of my disco shirt, hesitation lingered at the faded scars covering my bare stomach. They weren’t completely visible, a lump forming in my throat. Getting lost in my thoughts, Marcus dropping my pendant over my head ripped me back into reality. Sliding his hands down to my hips, his lips brushed against the top of my head.
“No one is going to see them and witchcraft isn’t so taboo. At least you look sexy. I look like someone’s dad back in the day.” He complained with a snarl on his lips, a quick peck on his cheek softening his frustration. Plucking the tarot card from his fingers, a date was required for me to work my spell. Lifting my pendant over my head, his hand stopped me. Fishing around his pocket, he pressed a silver engraved dagger into my palm. What was the point of this weapon? It wasn't that I didn't know my way around them but a deep disdain lingered with using them.
"I can’t have you trapped without a way out again.” He whispered gruffly into my ear, a shiver running up my spine. “Cut your palm and it should shrink into a charm.” Listening to him with a look of pure annoyance, my magic tended to keep me alive. Cutting my palm, a bright light blinded me. The light died down to reveal a jingling charm bracelet on my left wrist, pride glistening in his eyes. Offering him my palm, hunger burned in his eyes. Licking off the blood, the substance would keep him healing throughout our next mission. Remembering that I needed boots, Marcus crouched down to slide on a pair of worn black boots. Thanking him while reading the date one more time, something told me that today was going to get heated. Clearing my throat, it was time to go. Spinning my pendant clockwise, time would always be on my hand.
“I call upon the sands of time to whisk me away to the Quincy Market in Boston on the twenty-sixth of August in the year of nineteen seventy-six!” The pendant spun faster, a blast of energy knocking us onto the cobblestone street. Landing on our asses, one would think that we could land on our feet by this point but the energy was unpredictable. A sea of bell bottoms and brick buildings greeted us, a long sigh pouring from my lips. Staring at the card in my hand, nothing but the card of death greeted me. So much for the details, Marcus tapping my shoulder causing me to quit my silent fuming. Dropping my pendant over my head, his head rested on my shoulder.
“Any more information about our mission or are we in the dark per usual?” He grumbled venomously, his fingers drumming on my lap “Of course it had to be on a busy day.” Helping to my feet with him, the food vendors had people lining up and blocking the way. The energy shifted, a woman with a sleek silver bob and dazzling emerald eyes walked past me. Time slowed down, emerald ribbons following her. Her green crop top matched her brown bell bottoms to a tee, our eyes meeting for a second. Flipping her hair with a middle finger, my temper visibly flared. Chuckling under her breath, Marcus had to hold me back. Glancing around for the person she was meeting with, another energy giving us pause. A blood soaked man with dirty blonde waves around his shoulders darted after her, crazed ruby eyes lingering on us for a little too long. A golden spiked club dangled off of his wrist, screams and chaos erupted in the distance. Pushing our way through the crowd, a man lay at my feet. A jar of souvenirs rolled out of his pocket, the face having been beaten to a pulp. That mission was a bittersweet ending, a blast of green energy catching my eyes. Stomping on the tail of her time travel spell, Marcus grabbed my waist. Twisting through time to the land of the dinosaurs, the sheer force of the energy had us splashing into a pond of mud. Dragging ourselves out, she wasn’t getting away that easily. Grabbing onto her magic trail, one yank had them in the mud. Low growls rumbled in her throat as she pulled herself out, a steady stream of curse burst from her lips. Mud dripped to our feet, dinosaurs of all kinds darted around us. Parting our lips to speak, screeches had us hiding behind thick trees. More problems, right? Why did Murphy's law have to taint my plans?
“What the hell is your fucking problem!” She screeched over the chaos around us, a giant leaf tickling my legs. “The great Glanda Kills refuses to listen to anybody! The world will be ruled by chaos!” Rolling my eyes, someone was full of herself. Marcus poked his head around the tree, his club spinning in his hand. Placing my hand on his chest to calm him down, curiosity had me wondering who the hell she thought she was.
“Wow! We speak about ourselves by our names. The fact you speak of yourself by your name implies that you are less of a wicked witch.” I returned sarcastically, waiting with bated breath for a response. “Now we don’t have a backbone after time traveling like a reckless buffoon.” Marcus shot me a warning look, my palm rubbing against his chest to keep him calm. A fit of laughter burst from my throat at her mate and her arguing, the two of them weren’t in sync. Yanking Marcus down by the collar of his shirt, a purr rumbled in his throat. Not now, you hungry demon.
“Calm down, killer. We are going to split up and figure out how they fight.” I teased with a wink, disappointment dimming his eyes. “Play your cards right and we can have fun very soon. You do recall that a pure witch can only engage in such activities if she is married, right?” Huffing a playful fine, he pretended to get on his knees. Sticking out my tongue, I took my necklace off of my neck. Extending it into a smooth violet wand, violet ribbons swirled down my arm. Combining all four elements of nature into a single ribbon had been my specialty. Stepping out from behind the tree, Marcus crept in the opposite direction. Spinning my wand in between my fingers, something had to give.
“Miss Glanda, are you down for a good old fashioned witch’s duel or am I going to have to call you chicken?” I challenged her with a hearty laugh, the muddy witch stepping out from behind the tree. “She makes an appearance.” Raising her palm into the air, ruby poured down her arm. Bowing in my direction, a look of disdain leaving her lips at my steady bow. Manners weren't her strong point either, her disrespect pissing me. Refusing to show it, my composure remained as strong as it always was.
“You act like you are all high and mighty but you are no different than me. We keep breaking the laws of time and you never have yet to face any consequences like me.” She spat icily, my brow raising at her harsh words. “Oh wait, I forgot! The time guardians gave you a free pass because you want to improve people’s lives. How pathetic!” Pointing my wand her direction, another fit of laughter had me doubling over.
“Sure because destroying what has a right to live makes you so much cooler than me.” I taunted with a sly grin, storm clouds rumbling to life. “Screw you with that bullshit. Time isn’t my only strength, you foul wench. Unleash a storm!” Heavy rain soaked us to the bone, the mud splashing around our feet. Snapping her fingers, a blizzard replaced the rain. Snapping my fingers, the rain took over. Grinning ear to ear with triumph, a wave of my hand stopped the storm. Her lips parted to speak, a shrill roar ending our duel. A tyrannosaurus rex roared behind me, true fear rounding our eyes. Looking up slowly, angry yellow eyes met mine. Cursing under my breath, a bright flash of green announced her leaving with her partner. Marcus skidded up next to me, fresh bruises and cuts dotting his exposed skin. Shrinking my wand back down to my pendant, another roar rattled the ground beneath my feet. Dropping it over my head, we needed to get away from the current danger. Splashing through the mud, our eyes scanned the overgrown land for a solution. Hopping into a raging river, rough waters tossed us all about. Holding me close to him, his body took the brunt of the rocks hitting us. The water speed picked up, the sounds of a waterfall roaring away frightening me. Wiggling my fingers in the water, a wave tossed us onto a sandy beach. Rolling onto our backs, his wounds sealed shut. Turning over to face him, the corner of his lips curled into a twitching grin. Curiosity mixed with love, scarlet painting my cheeks.
“Did you plan any of this?” He inquired with a wink, a snort causing him to laugh. “Too bad that we couldn’t get him in jail. At the very least the guy will have the crimes linked to him. Why are you so beautiful?” Snorting at his compliment, his eyeballs must not be working. Sitting up, my hands rested on my knees. Taking off my necklace gingerly, Marcus grabbed my waist as I began to spin it counter clockwise. Time to blow this prehistoric dump!
“Time to go home. I call upon the sands of time to whisk me back home and to set this timeline in place.” I chanted with a wry smile, a blast of energy knocking us into a random park during present time. A familiar energy had my hair standing on in, a demon gang coming our way. Marcus noticed the numb but panicked expression on my face, his hands cupping my face. Struggling to find the words, chains had me paralyzed in my spot. Laughing with an apologetic grin, my past was coming back to haunt me. His stern expression told me to speak, my hand beginning to tremble uncontrollably. Why today of all days?
“I might have pissed off a gang of demons before I met you. So let’s say about twenty years ago.” I expressed with another nervous laugh, his hands dropping to his lap. Mumbling under his breath for a couple of minutes, his harsh words were sure to come my way. Staring around the park to seek out the gang, his attention returned to me. Working through what I had said, a long breath drew from his lips.
“Given your track record of running your mouth, I can presume that you talked yourself into the issue.” He pointed out simply, my eyes averting to the grass. “Judging by your expression, I am correct. While I enjoy our banter, most people don’t.” Jumping to his feet, his hand hovered in front of my face. Accepting his hand with vigor, one tug had me in his arms. Spinning me around, his lips brushed against the top of my hand. Was he ever the flirtatious Casanova or what?
“Wake up your dagger and get ready to talk in a different way.” He ordered with an annoyed expression, my charm expanded into its dagger. “Please do your best to keep your sharp tongue under control.” Clenching my fist, he didn’t flinch the moment I pressed my blade into his throat. As much as I adored him, he didn't have a right to talk to me like a child.
“My banter is my blade and my words are the sharp edge of it. Sue me if I like to mess with my enemies. They broke into my place in search of my pendant and I couldn’t let them take what was given to me.” I spat back, his expression twisting into a bemused grin. “Why won’t you marry me already! Am I not good enough for you! I can’t keep dropping the hint hard enough! I have been alive since the seventies. Do you know how long that is! I didn’t get abused by my father in a shitty home in the worst part of a small town to suffer an empty eternal life! Why did they have to stop me from aging at fucking twenty!” Cupping my mouth, his expression softened. Silent tears trickled down my cheeks, his mind putting two and two together. His lips parted to speak several times, seven masked demons approached us with black iron chains curled around their hands. The tallest one stepped forward, his chains whistling over his head. Preparing for a battle, dread bubbled in my gut.
“Do I have to burn you to get what I want?” He sneered furiously, my lips curling into a sadistic smirk. Must he interrupt an important conversation, my dagger spinning in my palm. Pointing it in his direction, Marcus towered behind me like a shadow. Marching up to him, surprise rounded his eyes. Did these demons not expect me to stand up for myself? Honestly, where were their brains?
“Even if you wanted the pendant, you still need me. Time travel is blood magic and that one person who has the blood is the one in charge of the crystal. Study your damn lore!” I berated him venomously, hovering the dagger over his heart. “Screw off or let me cut your freaking head off!” Rolling his inky eyes, his giant hand swallowed mine. A hearty laugh cascaded from his lips, his hand dropping to his worn jeans. Why put on a big show? Did he desire to mess with my mind in a friendly manner?
“I didn’t come here to fight. I came to warn you. My respect for you was garnered a long time ago when you mouthed off to me.” He warned me with a polite bow, Marcus lowering my blade gingerly with an apologetic smile. “No need for that, mate. Her sharp tongue is her blade. Back to why I wanted to talk to you. Glanda is hiring my cousin and his gang to come after you. Can’t help you because of family ties but know that I won’t be helping him. Have a fine day.” Turning to leave, my hand snatching the hem of his t-shirt had his eyes widening with shock. An apology was necessary, the words tasted odd on the tip of my tongue.
“Don’t leave like that. I am sorry for being rude. Thank you for the head’s up.” I apologized politely, a natural smile curling on his lips. “Where are we?” His words faded in and out, Marcus taking in the information for me. Crunching away, Marcus snapped his fingers in front of my face. Tuning him out again, Glanda’s energy seemed to be near. Dragging him towards the energy, his protests fell on deaf ears. Marching into a city, a pizza parlor ultimately being her destination. Hiding him behind a tree, our eyes watched Glanda stomp into the pizza parlor. Mumbling a spell under his breath, the filth lifted off of our outfits. Seconds from going in, Tarot stepped out of a flurry of tarot cards. Two ordinary bands glittered in his palms, Marcus grinning ear to ear. What did the two man children have planned?
“What I have here is two wedding bands that unify the lovely couple standing in front of me. They are both blessed by the demon king and the grand witch. Slide them on and you are a married couple.” He announced while floating around with a Cheshire Cat grin, Marcus turning towards me. “You didn’t tell her that you planned on asking her. After all that floating around!” Cupping my cheek, his other hand tucked my hair behind my ear. Blushing a deep scarlet, his golden heart made it impossible for me to be mad at him.
“I didn’t know about your past but I don’t care. Hear me out for a second.” He choked out adorably, his cheeks burning a deep crimson. “Do me the honor of becoming my wife in this crazy world. I have to admit something to you. Your light bathed me that day you darted past me with those wounds. You stopped to ask if I was okay and I couldn’t believe it. Everyone hated me at the time. Every moment since has been a blessing and I wish to have many more years with you. I ask again. Will you be my wife?” Melting into his arms, this had been my dream since I was a young child. The image of a big family flashed in my mind, the sight of our children running around a yard while laughing had me smiling softly to myself.
“Why would I ever say no?” I answered in an uncharacteristic lack of sarcasm, his nervous grin swelling into one of relief and pride. “Are you going to slide the ring on or what?” Returning our usual style of banter, his shaking fingers slid on the smaller wedding band. Accepting his band from Tarot’s palm, my own quaking fingers slid on his. Swinging me underneath him, his lips pressed against mine hungrily. Time slowed, the sound of the outside dying down. Our heart beat to the same beat, a tap on my shoulder had the sounds rushing back in. The bands twisted to matching silver metal flames, Marcus kissing the top of my hand. Tarot pointed towards the pizza parlor, Glanda stepping out of the restaurant. Hopping into a onyx town car, our target rumbled away. Tarot shoved his phone in my face, the article that pinned that man to those crimes. Happy to see that, something else ate at me. Why murder them if you could use them? Perhaps there was a special spell you could perform with those souls.
“Don’t worry about his death. Asphy told me that he was going to die that day, regardless.” He assured me with a comforting grin, Marcus embracing me from behind. “She is one of my friends and in charge of the universe. Maybe one day you could meet her. In fact, she is younger than you. The grand witch told me to give you this.” Feeling around the pocket of his suit, he pressed a lilac envelope into my palm. Ripping it open, my heart sank into my stomach at a request to meet with her personally. Lowering the card with a huff, Tarot shrugged his shoulders. What did she need with me now? Every time she asked for me, it was simply another witch hunt.
“Can you tell me if I am going to be ripped to shreds or is this a little spot of tea?” I questioned through gritted teeth, hating that my aunt was calling for me. “Fine, let’s go!” Bringing my dagger back to life, a quick slice had blood staining the paper. Lilac smoke swirled around us, a force of energy whisking us outside heavy lilac doors. Marcus kissed the top of my head, my dagger shrinking back down to its charm form.
“Whatever comes your way, I will be by your side.” He promised lovingly, shooting me a playful grin. “Your words are your blade and your bite is the sharp edge.” Looking back up at him, my husband watched me with all the love in the world. Our marriage may have been rushed but both of us would be more powerful. Perhaps the flames of hope could burn bright once more.

Yesterday I posted looking for advice and input as whether or not my SO is a JustNo. This breakup happened within the last hour and to make myself feel better about my decision and to further show myself this was the right thing, here all the way I think he was a JN (off the top of my head).
1.What happened yesterday, see my post history for that story.

1. When I was in law school, he would regularly pick fight with me before major exams.
   
2. My first week of my final year, he broke up with me because I didn’t answer the phone at 8 AM on a Sunday. He said I need to decide if I wanted to be in a partnership or not.
   
3. He’s currently unemployed but when he did work he was in transportation and worked on ships. Our first year together he told his job he could start the week of my birthday… and left to go out of state on my birthday… didn’t end up on the ship till the week after my birthday because that was when the rest of the new crew was coming.
   
4. Constantly would tell me that I don’t go to his house enough or see his parents enough. Sorry who’s responsible for making the plans he specifically wants?
   
5. I’m a lawyer, he constantly tried to pick fights with me about the law.
   
6. Regularly lectures me about “the right thing.”
   
7. When my aunt died, he had started a different kind of job, what I would call a normal-ish job. He told me he wouldn’t be able to take off of work for the funeral. He decided he was getting his wisdom teeth, taken out the same day the funeral and took off of work. Then three days before the funeral had the nerve to ask me to drive him to his wisdom teeth appointment. Then he told me he would be there for me emotionally if I needed him and then proceeded to ignore me the rest of the day/night.
   
8. Then I caught the flu and he disappeared and didn’t take care of me. Then picked a fight with me because my friend had just gotten dumped and all my other friends were considering a night out to support him and I mentioned I was included. He then lectured me about how his parents would be very upset if I went out with my friends instead of going out with them when they invited me. I had the flu… I literally didn’t leave bed.
   
9. My grandfather recently passed away. I had to go out of state and he came with me. The first three days of the trip he spent obsessively trying to figure out how he was going to join his parents at their vacation home in the same state a few hours away. Because he couldn’t figure it out he got increasingly agitated and irritated, and was rude to me.
   
10. I like to garden it’s something I’m really good at he decided now he likes to garden. I had asked him to build me a raised gardening bed. Instead he built his mom one someone who states she herself doesn’t have a green thumb.
    
11. When my SO did have his normal ish job he was so miserable and upset and took it out on me regularly, he was “so busy” that I saw him once a week and we had to switch off each week who’s house we’d hang at because “it had to be fair and 50/50.” One of those nights we had gone out to dinner, went back to his house where he made us sit with his parents and sister where he sat on the opposite end of the table from me on the opposite side of the table from me. I had a solid one hour of alone time with him.
    
12. When my aunt died, he made me go to his house and build furniture because this was part of the 50/50 it has to be fair period.
    
13. When we broke up the first time it was because he did this thing he normally does where he unilaterally decides he’s doing the plans he wants regardless of what I’ve been invited too and expects me to go with him. He decided we were going to his (50year old) family friend’s party for Halloween. We had been invited to 3 other events with people our own age (26).
    
14. He constantly fucks with my cat. When we broke up the first time I ended up adopting a kitten I fostered. My baby is the sweetest and loves everyone. He picks up my cat and refuses to put him down when he clearly wants to be put down. He also hissed at him the other night, he’s hissed 3 times totally in his life.
    
15. Another time with my cat, kitty was in the car in my lap with a harness on, my SO was driving, I saw a little girl and she saw my kitty so I thought I’d let him wave to her. My SO then decided TO TRY AND OPEN MY CAR WINDOW ON A BUSY ROAD WITH MY BABY IN MY LAP.
    
16. Right after the car incident, I put my cat in his carrier (my cat only goes outside in a carrier). My SO insisted on carrying the carrier, put the carrier over his head, isn’t paying attention and hits the carrier into the top of the door, and almost drops my cat.
    
17. He refuses to watch anything I want to watch, it’s a ducking fight. Plus he says he doesn’t like fiction.
    
18. When he drives my car he drives it like an asshole. Like scared for my life.
    
19. Will grab me and stop me from whatever I’m doing to pin me down and hug me.
    
20. Never thinks about me, one time we went to visit his sister at her new house. Everyone had slippers but me, it’s a no shoe house, I was the only one in socks. I felt so left out, like a line drawn in the sand. That’s family and there’s me.
    
21. He pays no bills, even when he worked (He’d pay for date nights, I mean insurance, phone, etc.) and has no responsibilities of his own.
    
22. We once went to a wedding, my house was basically in between the wedding venue and his house. He made me drive to his house, ride with his parents, past my house, twice. I realized I had forgotten to bring my meds with me because I was spending the night at his parents house. He said we’d go back to my house after the wedding. Then the wedding ended we got back to his house and he went to bed and told me to go alone… to my house to get my meds, then go back to his house.
    
23. While I was in law school and when he decided to no longer work on ships the first time, he enrolled in a master program, decided to fast track it, so he could graduate when I graduated law school. (P.s. he never finished the program)
    
24. Oh the job he was on when he missed my birthday the first year we were together, he unilaterally took it, didn’t talk to me about it. Then hated it a month in and every single day was his newest plan to leave the ship early.
    
25. He decided in December he was done working on ships the second time. This was when he came home. He was set to come home New Year’s Day. A week before Christmas he tells me he was going to surprise me with coming home early but it was canceled…. Well it really wasn’t and so he ruined the surprise for nothing. Then was so excited to surprise his sister like too excited. His parents picked him up from the airport, I wasn’t invited nor did he ask me, on Christmas Eve, then he planned to and did spend it with his family with no plans to see me. We then compromised for Christmas Day.
    
26. All holidays were with his family on his terms. I was okay with this except for Christmas Eve, that was always my holiday with my family and he REFUSED to spend any of it with me or my family. The first year of our relationship my mom and I went to his families celebration for Christmas Eve.
    
27. He never lets me listen to my music. I’m one of those people music is sacred to me. He always lowers it or turns off my music, won’t let me cook with my music on. One time had the nerve to tell me I should lower the volume because it may disturb his neighbors when I’m passing by.
    
28. We had a dry spell, I confronted him, he said it was because he’s not turned on by me in sweats. Then said I need to get cute sweats, proceeds to then explain basically how he’s not turned on unless I physically look good. Then the next day admits to taking care of himself when he’s not with me which is literally making him not want to bang.
    
29. Sex was always his terms his way, he wanted me to be a dominatrix. It’s just not for me, I use my brain for work, I don’t want to have to come home and come up with intricate ways to play that fantasy. I just want to be intimate and make love with my partner and NOT HAVE TO THINK.
    
30. He would constantly complain and fight with me about coming to my house and how I never go to see him. He wouldn’t invite me, he expected me to go hmm I have off focus let me invite myself to my boyfriends house and plan elaborate plans in that neighborhood I barely go to. Yet this man always drives to his friends houses which are 45 minutes to an hour away from where we live and his friends never go to him and if he’s not doing that for his friends, he’s driving to his sister or his grandmother‘s house to hang out with them while they will occasionally go to his parents house and he never complains.
    
31. I really don’t like driving at night/after work I feel drained and don’t want to be unsafe, he constantly invited me to do stuff by him and his family and expected me to some how get there myself. All the couples in his life would show up together, I got to show up alone. He doesn’t work he could get me.
    

The list honestly goes on. I’ll prob keeping adding to it on my phone in my notes app. Anyway, thoughts? Is this is all insanity? Did I do the right thing?
If you got this far thanks for reading!! Please feel free to ask any follow ups!

Standing in a desert with no one but Solomon and me, a quiet fear had me scratching the top of my hands. Snapping his fingers, the scene shifted to the president’s house. Staring down at my outfit, a frilly wedding greeted my trembling palms. Stepping back with a rounded eyes, his elbow hooked around mine. Leaning down to kiss me, a clammy sweat drenched my skin. Pushing him away, his claws sank into my arms. Shaking me while yelling at me, a scream burst from my lips.
Jerking awake in my chair, the other’s watched me with deep concern. Wiping my tears away, a wave of my hands shut them down. That monster was never going to be my husband, my teeth gritting. Rubbing at my dark bags underneath my eyes, that nightmare had been occurring too often. Jack’s words of comfort falling on deaf ears. Day two of a major migraine had me massaging my forehead, the lack of sleep leaving me feeling less than my usual self. Sinking into my seat, my fingers brushed against my chains. Another mission to a heavily populated planet had us rushing to aid those trapped in a discreet servant trade, my heart aching for them. Images of dead parents haunted me, the poor children probably sitting in cages. Remembering Scampy and Basy’s smile merely brought more unfiltered rage, the raw hurt of how they ripped me from my life biting my heart. Ignoring everyone through the long hours, we descended into the dark side of a mining planet. Undoing my harness, I dropped my helmet over my head. Everything doubled, Jack grabbing my shoulder the moment I snatched my staff off the wall. Mission first, then we can talk about my feelings. Although, the desire to talk about any of it wasn't there.
“What is going on with you lately?” He asked with an annoyed huff, my hand slapping his hand away. “You need to talk or you could compromise this mission.” Rolling my eyes, all of this was becoming too much. Icy and Whiskers joined my side, the conversation ended like that. Running in the shadows, the oxygen kicked one. Cloakie radioed me personally, his voice crackling in my ears. What did he want? Feeling cranky from my migraine, everything seemed to be a nuisance.
“Even I know that you aren’t okay. Talk to me while I hack into the system.” He spoke sternly, the corner of lips curling into a tired smile. “Don’t get me started on your lack of sleeping at night.” Digging at the light green sand, he had a point. Then again, would it be fair for Jack not to know what was going on before anyone else? His rights as a husband required that, my heart wanting to give him such a simple conservation. Alas, it was not a simple task to my anxiety- ridden mind.
“It’s nothing.” I spat impatiently, the three of us coming upon a clear dome protecting the kids. “Leave me alone.” The heavy door groaned open, Cloakie chastising me. Sprinting in, the door slammed shut behind us. Hiding behind a big rock, dirty kids walked by with carts of precious metal. Remembering the trauma that I was put through, horror rounded my eyes at the impaled parents on wooden spikes. Jack shook with raw fury behind me, my hand on his arm shutting him down. Turning on my radio, the boys shook their heads in protest at my order.
“Get the kids out of here. Pull the ship, Cloakie! I have a problem to deal with.” I ordered sharply, my concise words affirming my position on the matter. Skidding out of my hiding spot, golden energy glowed at the end of my staff. Missing my pets, my scaled ladies were on my ship waiting for my return. Think of something nice. Think of something nice to keep me calm.
“Come on out, Master Fachork! Face me like the man you aren’t!” I challenged him, his snake alien men looking up from what they were doing. “I suppose an appetizer is in order. Come and get me.” Sprinting into the mine, the ten henchmen crunched after me. Building up golden energy around my foot, a swift kick sent a cart clanking down a tunnel. Hiding in a large crack, the glow from my golden staff died down. Watching them crash down the tunnel with headlamps, the next step had to be completed. Coming out of my hiding spot, the number of casualties had to be kept to a minimum. Creeping out of the entrance, the pale moonlight of five moons gave me the light I needed while making my head pound harder. Sprinting towards a sea of tents, big eyes watched me skid into the tent. Jack appeared over the hill with about thirty children, the ten behind me cowering. Crouching down to their level, their breath hitched the moment I took off my helmet. Cupping the nearest child’s cheek, tiny tears dripped off of my fingers. The poor things had nothing to worry about in our care, a few of the homes opening up for them when we got back.
“You need to go with the blonde haired man. He is the way to safety.” I promised them sweetly, all of them running towards Jack. Pushing the flap out of the way on my way out, a big worn tent glowed in the distance. Hearing the ten men I ditched crunching behind me, time wasn’t on my hands. My footfalls echoed in the canyon, an elbow to each guard’s face had them hitting a patch of light green rock. Letting myself into the tent, a snake alien in a beat up leather suit placed his whiskey glass gingerly on a coaster. His neon green scales shimmered in the light of the flames, his golden snake eyes tracking me. Must they always be this creepy.
“Long time, no see. What has brought the great captain to my tent.” He commented casually, plucking a cigar from the case next to him. “Solomon said that you would come. Why don’t you want to be his bride? You could have all the riches in the world. After all, you are only a mutt.” Shrinking back, his words stung harder than usual. Slapping my cheeks to snap me out of it, I placed my helmet on his desk as gingerly as he placed his cup. Lighting up the cigar, he snapped his fingers. Solomon sauntered in, his arm yanking me close to his waist. Jamming a needle into my neck, my shaking hands shoved my staff into my belt before I went limp. Throwing me onto the bed, his steady hands chained me to the pole in the tent. Noting his horrid burns, our battle on that planet left a few scars. Smiling to myself, some damage had been dealt.
“Why am I not shocked at your survival? I should have known that my little prize had a way out.” He mused playfully, his finger tucking a loose piece of hair behind my ear. Shuddering involuntarily, my nightmare became one step closer to becoming reality. Plopping down next to me, he crossed his hands on his lap. True terror swelled within me, my plan of attack biting me in the ass again. Why couldn’t I ask for help like a normal person? Turning his head to face me, he plucked dust bunnies off of his expensive ivory suit. Smirking cruelly, his palm rested on my thigh. Silent tears stained my cheeks, a bomb rolling in giving me reasons to cry harder. The lack of beeping would be my undoing, my cleverness with my weapons not helping. A loud boom had the toad’s venom splashing onto us. The pure agony of it searing my face canceled out his drug, one solution remaining. Yanking on the pole with the chains holding me prisoner, a thud had the canvas falling over us. The end of the pole had been upended, my muscles protesting as I shimmied down the pole. Hitting the sand with a gruff groan, Master Fachork rolled around a few inches from me. Army crawling over to me, his eyes widened at me draping my chains around his neck. Hissing had my ears perking up, Ratalia slithering in. Venom flowed freely from her fangs. Sinking them into the soft spot on his throat, foam frothed around his lips. Seizing until his hand dropped to the sand, Ratonia lowered a healing potion into my mouth. Biting the glass, the thick liquid coated my throat. Spitting out the glass shards, the cuts on tongue would heal in a moment. Scooping me up, her tongue flickered against my face. Rubbing her scales, her eyes flitted over to Solomon. Wiggling my toes, enough feeling was back for me to walk. Sliding off of her with a kiss, my eager fingers curled around my staff. Steadying my legs, ice shot out from underneath me. Melting it with my golden energy, this was about to be a death trap for him. Electricity crackled to life around his palm, another wave of ice foiled my plans. Cursing under my breath, my scaled pets whisked me out of the tent. Setting me down, Solomon pulled himself out. His staff glistened in his hand, a malicious grin twitching on his lips. Charging at each other, our weapons locked in a position of power. Pushing each other back and forth, his hissing skin peeled off of his arm. Jamming my knee into his stomach, his body smashed into the rocks. Coughing up a fountain of blood, a couple of his organs had burst. Icy tossed me a vial of the venomous oil, Solomon charging at me. Wondering if the oil would burn him, today would grant me my answer. Rubbing the oil into the metal tip, my gloves protected me from its negative effects. Catching my reflection in the ice, faded scars covered my cheeks. As if I couldn't get any uglier, I cursed bitterly to myself. Screwing the top back on, a throw behind me had Icy catching it. Spinning my staff in my palm, Solomon appeared over me with electricity crackling over his staff. Blocking his strike clumsily, my body hit the sand. Rolling around to avoid his blows, my free hand grabbing a big old handful of sand. Throwing it in his face, a thud announced him hitting the ground next to me. Jack called for me to hurry up, Icy tapping his foot with a mixture of anxiety and impatience. Putting my hand in the air, I raised my beat up staff over my head. Slamming it into his head, his tongue rolled out of his mouth. Ratalia rolled my helmet over to me, a quick peck on her cheek had her rattling her tail with joy. Sprinting next to Icy, the others yanked us onto the ship. Tired children were strapped to the bars, Icy throwing me into my chair. Guiding my snakes into their harnesses, the door shutting had him leaping back into his seat. Hooking everything up, Jack backed up a bit before zooming into the inky sea of diamonds. Working the switches, a wormhole hummed to life. Flying in without thinking, he rode the waves of energy with ease. Skidding onto another one of the many jungle planets, the neon trees shooting from the ground. Not recognizing this planet, our coordinates had to be further out. Slowing to a stop, Jack killed the engine. Undoing my harness along with my pets, my snakes couldn’t be happier to be free. Typing at the keyboard, my ship did a run through of the oxygen levels. Watching the bar move up and down, a sigh of relief flooded from my lips at it falling well within the safety zone. Ditching my suit, curiosity had me running towards the door to explore. Typing in the code to open the door, my heart ached for the poor orphans we rescued.
“Whiskers and Jack will take care of you. I have to go make sure we are safe.” I announced with a bright smile, the kids cheering up a bit. “Cloakie and Icy! Come along!” Smoothing out my mechanic’s suit, Jack’s protests fell on deaf ears. The door hissed open, Icy’s helmet resting on a seat. A sickly warm breeze lashed at my cheeks, Icy laying his hand on my shoulder.
“Maybe you should talk to Jack. He wouldn’t stop talking about how worried he is about you.” He suggested with a cautious grin, his words holding weight. “Do it for me if you can’t bring yourself to do it.” Pushing me towards Jack, Jack ran his hand through his hair. Yanking me closer to his hips, his forehead pressed against mine. Rocking back and forth for a minute, a hallucination of Solomon had me leaping back. Apologizing pathetically as I ran off the ship, Cloakie and Icy had no choice but to follow me into the lush neon blue and pink vegetation. My pets slithered to my side, the company feeling welcome. Icy cleared his throat as a bloody Bogs waved at me from behind a tree. The color drained from my face, a clammy sweat drenching my skin. Fighting back tears, the scientists from the bomb project had silent tears staining my cheeks. Something seemed off, the scent of deception poisoned the air. The dirt crunched behind us, Jack fussed with his leather jacket. Grinning ear to ear maliciously, a gun glinted in his hand. The others stared at me with odd expressions, my boots pounding deeper into the jungle. Running until I couldn’t, a spike cut my palm. Strange neon pink sludge oozed into my palm, a rough darkness stealing me away.
Standing in the lab of my bomb building project, the scientists waved at me as I crossed the threshold. Happy to be working for me, long emerald waves brushing against the top of my hand spoke of better times. Remembering what day it was, the petite mouse alien dropped the nuclear material onto the floor. A blast knocked me out of the space, a burnt scientist slamming the door shut to prevent a nuclear leak. A ringing in my ears mixed poorly with the rushing sounds of my burst ear drums, officers rushing in around me. Touching my forehead, blood painted my finger. Jack rushed up to me, his words sounding as if he was under water. Reaching for the door, a pool of blood hit my boot. All of them were gone, tortured wails bursting from my lips. The commander marched up to me, her hand pinning me to the wall. Her face blurred, her beratement fading in and out. Jack began to argue with her, a punch sending him into the wall. Kneeing her in the gut, she had no damn right. Dropping me to the floor, the crack of my skull plunged me into darkness.
Groaning awake in her secret torture chamber, the vodka was hot on the commander’s breath. Leaving me alone with someone else, terror had my muscles shaking like a leaf. A thick cloth covered my eyes, Jack’s screams shattering what composure remained. Chains rattled as I realized that a cage surrounded me. A familiar voice had chills running up my spine, Solomon’s claw tracing my cheek. Shivering with fear, my burst ear drum gave me a small bit of relief.
“The commander promised you to me. Together we can destroy all that is around us.” He bragged gleefully, his bright tone frightening me further. “We are the same age and from the same town. Let’s just say I am simply obsessed with you. Too bad the commander is under my control.” Laughing maniacally, the door blew open. Snapping her fingers, the heel of his boots clacked to the other side of the room.
“Do you know what you have done!” She roared thunderously, her slap had a stream of fresh blood dripping down my cheek. “The president wants my head.” Unlocking the cage, she ordered Solomon to follow her out. Too feeble to move, the image of blood pouring out from underneath the door haunting me. The door squealed open, Jack staggered in with bruises all over his face. Leaning down to check up on me, his arms draped me over his shoulder. Too weak to fight back, violent sobs wracked my body. Closing the door to our room, the lock clicked shut. Laying me down on my bed, he collapsed next to me. Burying me in a desperate embrace, my emotions soaked his blood soaked shirt. Apologizing profusely, his finger lifted up my chin.
“It was all an accident.” He wept as hard as I was, several of his friends being caught in the blast. “This isn’t your fault.” Unable to speak, his lips brushed against my forehead. Neither of us spoke of the feelings passing between us, a deep despair silencing our hearts.
Sitting up with a deep gasp of air, the streaks that were stars told me that we were heading home. The medical room greeted me, my frantic eyes flitting between the details. Wiping the tears from my eyes, every breath grew shorter. Violent sobs wracked my body, the memory of my friends getting disintegrated breaking me all over again. Cupping the sides of my head, a broken scream exploded from my lips. Jack burst in, his wet eyes glimmering with relief and a dark worry. Sweeping me into his arms, he buried me into a desperate embrace.
“They died because of me! They died because of me!” I cried into his chest, my breathing growing faster. Hitting his back repeatedly, I wanted to be anywhere but here. Letting me work through my panic attack, his finger lifted up my chin. His tears splashed onto my face, the corner of his lips quivering. Why was I so messed up?
“Like I said before it was an accident.” He assured me with his real smile, my muscles giving out. “You worked yourself up again. My friends died that day but they shut the door so you didn’t die. They knew what they were getting themselves into. I love you with all of my soul and I need you to know that I am here for you.” My tears raced down his arm, the inability to smile back scaring me. Attempting to smile, his head shook.
“Stop trying to smile when you can’t. The depression doesn’t go away but what you are doing is dangerous. You can’t keep shoving it down or things like this will keep happening. Please talk to anyone if it can’t be me.” He pleaded with another one of his loving smiles, his lips pressing against mine tenderly. “Let me see your palm.” Lifting up my palm gingerly, the infected cut oozed. Scooping me into his strong arms, my heart fluttered at how handsome he looked. Gathering his supplies with his free hand, he sat me down on the bed. Working on my wound, something had to be said.
“I hate myself every day. People like Bogs died for me and I can’t live with that.” I admitted brokenly, his lips pursing into a playful smirk. “I want to get better. This depression is drowning me but everyone keeps me going.” Finishing with my wound, his hand cupped my cheek. Jack was my rock and I really needed him in this vulnerable moment.
“I hear you. You aren’t the monster you think you are. We all love you. Get some rest.” He returned sweetly, kissing the top of my head. Turning to leave, I leapt onto his back. Begging for him to take me with him, a warm yes had a bit of life returning to my eyes.

Standing in front of an abandoned buffet style restaurant, Lord Actorn shifted uncomfortably next to me with his ruby rifle. Blood bullets hung around his belt, his request for it only being two of us throwing me off. Glancing over at him, the next demon’s energy swallowed the area in unnatural darkness. Perhaps today would be easy. Then again, my luck would never allow such a luxury.
“Not that I have a problem with today but why did you want it to be the two of us?” I queried with a curious grin, wondering what sin he represented. “Unless you have something that is bothering you.” Sniffing the air, the sweet smell of gluttony had a bit of dread hardening in my stomach. Actorn’s presence made sense, another secret resting on his tongue.
“Nothing but an old rivalry that I wish to settle. I am a stickler for ending the fights I begin.” He answered nonchalantly, my brow raising at how casual he spoke. “What is wrong with wanting to spend some time with an old friend?” Plucking my blade from its case, ice crept out a bit from underneath my boots. Was his mate with a little bat? Shrugging my shoulders, that was his news to share. Smoothing out his simple onyx suit, his crooked grin had me smiling to myself. Kicking the door open, a barrage of eighties decor had me scrunching up my nose. Candles burned on the counter, a rat scurrying past me had me leaping into the air. Landing clumsily, embarrassment painted my cheeks. Scanning the space for any sign of our target, a greasy bright orange curl floated to my boot. So we were looking for a redhead.
“Are you delivering the final blow?” I whispered for him and only him to hear. His sadistic grin spoke of what he desired, the final blow becoming his. Accepting my role as the distraction, his revenge would be served for him on a silver platter. Getting lost in thought, a smack to the back of my head had me hissing in his direction. Dragging me into a booth, his hand held my head down. Hiding in the shadows, a gaunt demon walked into the view, the lights flickering on. Inky eyes scanned the space, Actorn covering my mouth. What had him on edge?
“In the case that death claims me, I need you to know this.” He whispered with a big old grin, the anticipation killing me. “She is carrying a little bat and I have to make this world safe for my family. Will you help me with that?” Mouthing congratulations, pride glistened in his eyes. Focusing on the greasy curls, her mark glowed bright. Fussing with his loose gray suit, his eyes checked his watch. Chewing on his bottom lip, the door creaked open. Arvy stepped into view, her clawed fingers drumming against her legs. Actorn held me back the moment she ripped out his heart, her bloody hand dropping his heart down her throat. Watching him decay to ash, her eyes flitted around the room. Sniffing the air, a devilish grin curled on her lips. Something smelled different about her scent, concern flashing in my eyes for a hot second.
“Come on out, Nyx!” She sang sweetly, the level of sweetness sickening me. “I know that you are here. He had to go because that poor guy was going to side with you. We couldn’t have that now, could we?” Dragging her blade along the metal buffet table, the locks on every window and door clicking had chills running up my spine. Our way out was gone, blasts of energy shooting booths into the air. Crawling on the floor, Actorn urged me to move faster. Popping to our feet in the corner, her blade whistled in my direction. Smashing the nearest window, Actorn’s protests fell on deaf ears the moment I threw him through the broken window. The glass repaired itself, his fist banged on the window. Throwing my hand in the air, there was no way this battle would be safe for him. His injuries would hinder what I wanted to investigate, anger mixing with bewilderment in his eyes.
“Get Salem to bring some potions for me. That is my order!” I shouted through the glass, the hem of his coat floating up as blood ribbons whisked him away. Spinning on my heel to give my full attention to my sister, a wicked grin resting on my lips. Running my hand through my hair, my baby blue sweater dress made me feel out of place. Prepare yourself for a battle of lovely banter, I told myself with a huff
“What a lovely family reunion.” I scoffed with a bit of a bite, her eyes rolling. “Wounds won’t do much to me but you are going to hurt horribly in the morning.” Ice crept out from underneath my feet, her finger wagging in the air. Blood coated her teeth, alarm rounding my eyes. Her blades hit the floor, horror rounding my eyes at her collapsing to her knees. Shit! My nose had been correct. The word boss had me spinning around to find him, her discreet moans waking me up to her situation.
“My boss sent me to warn you of what happens if you don’t listen to him.” She wheezed with a free smile, blood pouring from the corner of her lips. “I wanted to say goodbye to my dear sister. Before you ask, I don’t want your immortality. That sounds like a bitch.” Approaching her cautiously, her hands cupped her cheeks. Getting on my knees, my hands cupped hers. Kissing her forehead, our relationship may have been strained but that didn’t mean that her happy ending couldn’t happen. Tears welled up in my eyes, our foreheads pressing together. No one deserved this ending, the coldness proving to be more frigid than my ice powers.
“Why did your boss kill you?” I choked out through a wall of tears, her grin softening to a broken smile. Her lips parted to speak, her hands shoving me to the worn floor. A blade made of chains slid into her brain, the color draining from my cheeks as I moved my eyes up to an eight foot tall mountain of a demon. His ashy gray waves floated around his shoulders, his ruby eyes glittering with malice as she lifted up her body. Horror rounded my eyes at him dropping her limp body into his mouth, clammy sweat glistening on my skin at his inky lips closing with a single swallow. His ornate Victorian suit hugged his muscular body, his tongue licking his lips with a wink. Scrambling back, this couldn’t be happening. Who the hell was he? Playing his ruby horns, his fingers traced the immense curls. What was his weakness? Dread bubbled in my gut as I popped to my feet, my trembling hand pointing my blade towards his throat. Sauntering up to it with a cruel grin, the tip pressed into his throat. A ribbon cascaded down his throat, a newfound fear had me swimming in the pool of hesitancy.
“You are like the rumors say, Miss Nyx.” He mused with a wicked chuckle, his fingers curling around my blade. “Thank you for weakening my stepdaughter. She was a pain in my ass and spoiled too. Her mother tasted like the finest cut of beef. The operation is now under new management and you are in my way.” Panic twisted my features at him plucking me off the floor, a simple throw smashing me through the wall. A broken pipe impaled me, a fountain of blood burst from my lips. Holding the pipe, ice devoured it until it became a brittle piece of metal. Smashing my hilt against the ice, shards glittered in the moonlight the moment I hit the floor. Crawling behind the counter, he was going to know who he was messing with. Mouthing a silent healing spell, the wound sealed shut. Poking my head over the counter, his boots rang out in the next room over. Sliding back down, my fraying nerves had to die down before I made the next move. Rolling onto the bottom shelf, chains shattered the mirror behind the counter. Struggling to keep my head on, the corner of my lip trembled with pure fear. Even if I charged at him, his strength surpassed mine greatly. Glass crunched as he rounded the corner, the realization of my trail of blood sickening me. Ripping me out from underneath the counter by my throat, he smashed me into the broken glass. My blade clattered onto the floor, his boot kicking it away. Refusing to let despair haunt my eyes, my defiant grin pissed him off.
“Wow! You can’t devour me like your freaking family.” I taunted coolly, hiding my fright behind an even bigger grin. “Get over yourself.” Shards of glass dug into my back, his grip tightening on my throat. Black chains curled around my neck, my pride not letting him show how much he was scaring me. All I had to do was hold on until Salem showed up to rescue me, an idea coming to life in my mind. If his ego ran his mind, then I was going to screw with it. A sly grin on my lips had curiosity twinkling in his eyes, his head cocking back. What would get him going?
“If you are the big guy, show me what you have. Unless you’re a chicken.” I pointed out with a disdainful sigh and wink, air becoming a rare commodity. Swinging me around, bones groaned with every slam on the counter and then the floor. Dragging me through the glass, the pricks of every piece sinking into my tender flesh had me wincing. Landing inches from my blade, my fingers clawed for the hilt. Extending my claws from my fingertips, relief washed over me at the hilt hitting my eager palm. Ice crept out from underneath my palm, wicked laughter rumbling in my throat.
“Ice kingdom! Devour everything around you.” I chanted with another dark chuckle, a blizzard roaring to life as a foot of ice devouring everything. Too stunned to move, the heel of my boot smashed into his chest. Skidding back, my palm slammed onto the counter. Rising to my feet with a tired smile, I spun my blade in my palm. Skating over to him, this next move would be sure to bring the house down. Raising my heel over my head, the building shattered to pieces. Skating around the bewildered jerk, his eyes couldn’t follow me in all of the snow. Now the field was mine, a chance could be withstood.
“Quit playing, little mouse! Party tricks won’t fool me.” He bellowed over the howling winds, his body smashing towards me. Sparks danced in the air with every violent clash, our bodies flipping over each other. Landing on the other side of the debris, his blade swung towards my head. Slamming the tip of my blade into the ice, the sheer energy had me flying into the air. Angling my blade for his beefy neck, shock rounded my eyes the moment his hands curled around the sharp edge of my blade. Slamming me into the ice, several bones broke as a couple organs burst. Cursing under my breath, he stomped over to me with a ball of flames in his palm. Aiming it for my face, a quiet chuckle had his brow cocking. One leg still worked, a swift kick sent him flying into the sky. Mouthing another healing spell, bones clicked back into place. Huffing impatiently, time wasn’t on my hands. The last fragment clicked into place, a quick roll over the left had his blade missing me. Hopping to my feet, my boots skated with ease. The energy shifted, a discerning alarm rounding my eyes. Forming an ice dome over me, his black flames melted everything around me. Cold water soaked me to the bones the moment another wave of flames stole my protection, his eager grin spreading cheek to cheek. This wasn’t a battle I could win, my eyes flitting around the surrounding trees and abandoned buildings. Time slowed as he lowered his blade towards my neck, a clear escape presented itself. Pushing off the snow last minute, my boots glided down his blade. Taking my shot, the sharp edge of my blade cut through his horns like butter. Flipping out of his range, the snow crunched with every step away. Running until I couldn’t anymore, Deerthos yanked me through his wall of protection. Collapsing into his arms, his kind smile had me trembling like a damn leaf. My new enemy marched up to the edge, his fist banging away. Shouting an endless barrage of insults, my back straightened. Asserting my authority with a fit of hearty laughter, my middle fingers made an appearance. Alas, it was not the most mature reaction but it was all I had in me.
“You may have your team but I have mine.” I bragged with Cheshire Cat grin, frustration mixing with rage beautifully in his eyes. “It seems that this little mouse is still up to playing your silly little game. Love the new look by the way. Who knows when horns grow back? Is your pride hurt a bit?” Chewing on his lip, his finger traced the wall. A sly grin spread cheek to cheek, his tongue licking his lips. Lewd, that was utterly lewd.
“You are quite lovely! What I wouldn’t do to have you as my mate.” He mused with a wink, disgust mixing with my obvious iciness. “Our fight t’was fun. Imagine that, a bride that can’t be devoured by me. We are made for each other.” Laughing so hard that snorts had me cupping my stomach, my blissful grin gave him pause.
“Absolutely not. My bond is with somebody else.” I returned stiffly with a polite smile, his lips curling into a hard snarl. “There’s the jerk I know. Did you really think you could shoot your shot after devouring your step daughter. Hell no.” Backing up, Salem rising up behind me had him shrinking back. Black flames whisked him away, Salem held the bastard’s horns in his hand. Spinning me around to face him, his stern expression had me shrinking back.
“Want to tell me how you pissed off Emberon? He was in his little piece of paradise and now he is out to destroy the world.” He chastised me, shame dimming my eyes. Shame boiled to impatience, impatience boiling to justified fury. Facing my back towards him, my arms folded across my chest. The whole day had been a shit show and he had the galls to yell at me.
“I didn’t bring him, Arvy did!” I spat viciously, his arms curling around the small of my waist. “He devoured her whole and mumbled something about eating her mother. As much as I didn’t like her, her ending didn’t need to be that. If she had come to me before, I would have taken her under my wing and saved her. The problem is that she showed with death’s hand on her shoulder. I hate myself for not being able to save her.” Silent tears stained my cheeks, his chin resting on my shoulder. Apologizing with a peck to my cheek, his loving gaze doing little for fraying nerves. Actorn waved in the distance, an icy gust giving him pause. Too much raw anger sieged in my mind, snowflakes danced around aimlessly. Ice knocked Salem back, a portal into Hell creaking open. Leaping into the snowy landscape, creatures of all kinds darted around. Crunching through the snow towards the castle, the hole sealed shut. Alone, I needed to be alone. A noise had me crunching to a halt, Mamba approaching me with a weary smile. Fussing with his thick winter coat, his hand reached for mine. Continuing to walk away, his pleas fell on deaf ears.
“Please stop and listen to me.” He begged with a pensive grimace, a huffy yes flowing from my lips. “What is eating you? You are not usually like this.” Spinning on my heels to face him, he ran his fingers through his hair. Concern had me sighing to myself, my wet eyes meeting his. What I didn’t get was the constant fear of Salem? Sure, he had his bad side but he meant well.
“What I don’t get is why he immediately recoiled away from Salem and why that bastard thought it was okay to devour his family.” I ranted freely, Mamba taking it all in with an honest smile. “His dark side was as bad as mine. What crimes did he commit? All I remember while working with his mother was him coming home bloody and bruised every goddamn night. Whenever I would ask, he wouldn’t give me a generic freaking answer.” Clearing his throat, Salem’s hand held my shoulder. Struggling to speak behind me, he didn’t ask me to turn around.
“I killed a few people and I got into several spats with a few gangs. Generally, I let my shadow take over to numb any emotion I had left. Then you came along, a new light stealing away the darkness.” He admitted with tears in his voice, his hand trembling on my shoulder. “I didn’t want to be that guy anymore. I saw you that first day and the violence meant nothing. You can h-” Spinning on my heels, my lips pressed against his tenderly. The tenseness in his muscles dissolved in seconds, my hands cupping his cheeks. Gazing lovingly into his wet eyes, his hands curling around mine. This was the Salem I needed, the truth helping out a bit.
“We all did things we weren’t proud of. Lord knows that I have made a few but we are human in a way. The darkness had you and I was your lantern.” I comforted him sweetly, his arms clutching me close to his chest. “I am sure whatever beef you had with that monster was necessary. Next time you need help, tell me. My ears are always open.” Resting his chin on my head, his next words had me laughing to myself.
“Only if you come to me if you have problems. Trust me. Murder isn’t in your repertoire.” He joked lightly, his laughter causing my heart to flutter. “Do you think that he has more medicine ready? We might as well use our trip down here.” Bending down, the cool snow felt nice in my palm. Rolling it into a ball, I bounced it off of my palm. Throwing it in Mamba’s direction, his features brightened at it hitting his jacket. Scooping up a pile of snow, it whistled in my direction. Engaging in a full on snowball battle, our laughter danced in the air. Snow covered their suits, both of them catching their breaths. Basking in the warmth of the moment, Salem ran up to me. Spinning me around, our hair floated up. Lowering me to the snow, his lips kissed my big smile passionately. Time slowed to a stop, our hearts beating to the same song. The sounds rushed in with Mamba clearing his throat, the way back home glowed to life underneath his feet. Hopping into his circle, his ribbons whisked us into the kitchen of the mansion. Actorn leapt from the table to ambush me with gentle queries of my mental well-being. Placing my hands on his shoulders, he had nothing to worry about.
“I am good. Go smother your mate with love and adore her with all of your heart.” I urged with a couple of pats, his lovely lady calling for him in between vomiting bouts. “Let's make you a pot of tea.” Focusing on the task at hand, Mamba excused himself. Staring out numbly at the golden moon, Salem helped me get the teapot of ginger tea going. Embracing me from behind, his body swaying back and forth. Grabbing a couple of tea cups, two of my team members were going through a rather special experience. Was it because of me that families were being created.
“What did you do to Emberon to get him scurrying away like the cockroach he is?” I interrogated calmly, my tired eyes meeting his exhausted grin. Dropping his hands to his side, his hand ran through his hair. Bowing his head in shame, a grimace twitching on his lips. Surely, it couldn't be too horrid.
“I killed his first wife because my mother told me to but they were running a slave ring. Part of me regrets committing that action but so many children got to go home that day.” He choked out through a wall of tears, the teapot whistling. “I killed his mate that day. He could have killed me but he broke down. That wail was something else.” Moving the teapot off the burner, he had nothing to worry about. Wrapping my arms around his waist, his suit jacket brushed against my cheek. His heart meant well but they were criminals at the end of the day.
“The way I see it, they had it coming. Yes, it sucks. What about the people you saved?” I pointed out with my real smile, our foreheads pressing together. “Our job isn’t easy. The odds of us breaking up a family are rather high. Don’t be too hard on yourself. I was thinking about something. What if we tried for another one when this is all over? Imagine loads of kids running around and growing up together.” Life returned to his eyes, his hands sliding down to my flat stomach. Rubbing it affectionately, pure bliss twinkled in his eyes.
“Do you promise to give me as many kids as I desire?” He gushed with his million dollar smile, his mind seeming to be churning about. “Remarry me!” Stepping back in confusion, a tender blush rose to my cheeks as my lips curled into a playful grin. Pinning my ears back, his eager eyes picked up on my odd expression.
“Let’s do it right this time. My whole life I wanted to do more than simply eloping you. A gorgeous wedding gown would be stunning on you. We could celebrate and all that jazz. Our anniversary is approaching. Please!” He pleaded adorably, his palms pressing together. Samson ruffled my hair on the way in, Flyx bounced in behind him. Placing Sphynx into my arms, his plaid shifted as he began to prepare the tea. How did he always know when to show up? Right, I was his alpha in all technicality.
“Do it!” He spoke up confidently, wiping his hands on his jeans. “You have an eternity together and a hell of a second chance. Have the wedding of your dreams and live life like you never got to. Things are bleak but celebrations are known to lift the mood. I look forward to planning your wedding menu for you.” Swiping the cups off the counter, he bounced down the hall. Like the unsung hero he was, his heart was in the right place with that sweet suggestion.
“I would love to but let’s keep it simple. Big parties scare me.” I chirped cheerfully, rocking my son back and forth. Scooping up Flyx, Salem covered him in feverish kisses. Giggles twinkled in the air, the flames of hope burned high. Grant us the ability to win this war.

With my first run at Nationals in the books I wanted to follow up on my previous post on sport shots:
Overall it was a wonderful and humbling experience. I had quite a few blind spots in my prep that left me with a false sense of confidence going into the tournament, and there's some stuff that I just wasn't going to be able to prepare for. I clocked in around 1450 all events and left about 200 pins on the table in missed makables alone, not to mention giving the pocket away for 6 frames at a time. Not having bowled in this before, I had to use a sport adjusted average of 202 which fortunately kept us in a lower division, but in terms of adjusted average-to-scores I was the worst bowler on my team by a mile. I just received word that our two lowest averages who bowled doubles together are currently in a cashing position, they bowled better than all of us the whole time.

1. The bowling plaza at Southpoint is unlike anything I've ever experienced. Up to that point I'd never bowled on fully synthetic Brunswick lanes/approaches, and never bowled in a venue with the design of Southpoint. It's 50 foot ceilings with bright lights and each pair has two massive scoring screens on top. It's one of those things that you don't realize will be an impairment until you're there. At approx. 6 feet tall the glare from the screen was firmly hovering between the dots and arrows for me at the line. The approaches being the exact same color as the lane plays tricks on your eyes and extends your view of the lane much more than a typical east coast house where the lane is darker and you're on wood approaches. This had a massive impact on my spare shooting, particularly cross lane angles where it played tricks on my eyes. I'm going to begin my search for a place to practice on the east coast, but so far I can't think of any, synthetic approaches especially are almost unheard of due to the humidity out here.
   
2. The oil pattern is tough. To preface this, my prep was 4 events at local houses on 3:1 patterns, I won my 2nd event and averaged just under 200 at each outing while viewing them more as practice than something I was trying to win. When they release the pattern I'd expect it to be less than 1.5:1. All of that to say, there's a big difference between 3:1 and nearly flat, much moreso than going from say 6:1 to 5:1. It's also notable that the pins do not fly around, we were on a pair with 3 crankers and there were no light mixers to be had, on the plus side the machines were very accurate and I saw no leaves that I would associate with bad racks - pocket 7-10s, 8-10s etc. I was also not prepared to shoot some of my spares, I typically keep the ball in play and I can't recall leaving anything worse than a 6 count in years. I found myself having to convert absolutely ridiculous leaves several times, like 1-3-4-5-7-8 (nobody knew what took the 2 pin out lol)
   
3. Not having a pattern sheet makes prep difficult but I'm also not sure it would have made much of a difference. We spent some time in the stands behind people who looked pretty good and were fairly surprised to see a wide variety in angles of attack, I think the shape/ratio/volume of the pattern was such that there was really no set-in-stone breakpoints or angles. We paid close attention to the USBC social media posts of people shooting big scores and deduced that we'd have to be outside of 10 breaking around 8, but for the team event we ended up with a much better look deep inside breaking around 10 and that was completely unexpected.
   
4. Unless you're local you'll have to either ship your stuff or bring them on the plane. I decided to bring 3 plus a spare ball and I completely wasted a ball spot with a Hustle. The volume of oil was more than I'd seen (particularly for the Bowlers Journal) and there was no point, even on game 6 of singles and doubles, where the Hustle was going to work. I had effectively brought two spare balls at that point. It was also a huge mistake to lug them around in a backpack and small roller that I bought to stay under the 50 lbs limit rather than getting a locker straight away
   
5. This is more of a personal issue but: Vegas is hot. I live in an area where it's under 50 degrees 6 months out of the year and I almost never bowl in the summer. It was mid 90s all week and I had to wear pants while bowling (I wear shorts almost exclusively once it's up to 50 degrees). My hands get clammy and swell in warmer weather. It tough to get my hand out of the ball most of the time.
   
6. Also a personal issue: Vegas is tempting, at home during the week I don't drink on bowling nights. We went out the night before teams and I was not in peak shape when the event started, that's 100% on me. I was never going to bowl well jet lagged and hung over and I had complete control over 50% of that.
   

I'll be in baton rouge next year with a better perspective. As of now I plan to make the following changes:

1. Take two days on either end and drive instead of flying, I'm about 20 hours away from the venue. I hate flying anyway and I can save money vs 2 round trip plane tickets, a rental car, and a dog sitter. Plus I can bring a lot more equipment and more convenient ball bags - and leave the light oil gear at home. Obviously not realistic for Vegas and Reno but oh well.
   
2. Take a weekend trip to the nearest high ceiling full syth house (If I can even find one) and document my spare angles/standing points.
   
3. Behave myself for the bowling days and leave an extra two to see New Orleans after bowling has concluded.
   
4. Take my time. They made a big deal about keeping pace and we were the first to finish in every event. It's hard to avoid the spiral especially in doubles/singles and I rushed through it for no reason. People finished a full half hour after us without ever being told to hurry up.
   

All in all it was a good time, I wish I bowled better, and I wish they allowed neat shorts and/or held it in the north east more than once every 20 years

20, 6’1 310lbs
Taking test 250mg 3x pin mon wed fri Hcg 500iu same thing Anavar daily 30mg
Have been lifting for 5 years inconsistently but consistently past year, was 210 at my lightest but ballooned up working for a food company
Lost 20 lbs but felt extremely weak and depressed despite taking proper vitamins/sunlight/sleep diet so hopped on gear
When I woke up nipples were puffy but no sensation at all, no hardness on nipples, then at around bed time there started to be a weird feeling in my righy nipple, not painful, it’s like a hot sensation
I started taking some vynase so idk if that caused it and it’s in my head or what but I’m scared
I’m thinking it’s the HCG + aromitisation from being so big
I have aromasin and nolvadex but not going to just chug it down, wondering the proper time to use it and sides
Roast me, help me, whatever, I am a bit scared
Edit: woke up, nipples look exactly the same as a week ago, no sensation but still somewhat puffy, no hardness or lump under

Thank you for this universe!
And many thanks to for being a full co-writer on this project!
Kaeden and Vichee belongs to and I thank them so much for working with us! It was an honor!
Sven belongs to Bjorn the Copper Paladin from Discord. I hope to do more with them in the future, and have tons of fun!
And don’t you worry about that final in the title! We have some news at the end!
[First]- [Prev]- {Next Story!!}

{Is the reason that everything happened to Tarlim in the first place?}

{Only up to the ramps, mostly. Trying to impress upon people the importance of accessibility for those with extenuating circumstances. At least according to the records I have access to.}

{The average person knows as much about his friends as they do about Mike Collins.}
<...Who?>
{Exactly. 20th century human spaceman, was there for their first lunar landing. Didn’t get to put boots on the ground, and nobody remembers his name now.}

{Hell, I didn’t even know about him until I put in a search query of niche historical figures just to give you an example. Yeesh…}

(Program Selected.)
(Resume Selected Media? [Y])
(Playing…)
Archived Closed Circuit Security Video - Establishment: Exterminator’s Office - Dawn Creek Division - Subbasement - Date Recorded (ST): OCT 31, 2136 - Timeframe (ST): 11:42 - 11:45
The parking bay is silent. Vans are parked neatly in their spots which frame the hallway to the armory and fuel storage for the camera. A ding is heard and something moves in the hallway. Five fully suited Venlil and a Zurulian step out of an elevator and run towards a van. The sound of a door slamming open comes from the hall roughly 6 seconds later. A stream of Exterminators pour out into the hall from the stairwell.
Their voices are indecipherable as they speak over each other. A Sulian runs into the armory and reappears with a huge flamer tank on their back. Another Zurulian can be seen with an extinguisher tank, but a Venlil bleats at them and tosses it aside. They drag the quadrupedal alien quickly into the parking garage before physically throwing them into the back of a van.
From the back of the hallway, a fluid can be seen spreading across the ground. A trio of Venlil back out of a room while holding their flamers up. They are unlit, instead spewing fuel out of their nozzles. The trio twirl around in an overly animated manner as they walk down the hall to the parking garage. A van pulls out of its spot with windows down so the passengers could let out a cheer.
A black-suited Venlil runs up to the spraying trio while waving their arms to get them out into the garage. The microphone just barely manages to catch him saying, “We need to save some for the predators!” One of the other Venlil replies, “Yes sir, Mafchi!” A short flurry of curses is heard as the gathered exterminators pile into the three other visible vans. Two of the vans speed out of the garage, forcing some other Venlil exterminators to dive out of the way in the process.
The black-suited Mafchi picks up a fuel canister that had been dropped and twists off its cap. He slings it under his shoulder and pours a line of fuel. He marches straight to the final van and hops up into the open rear. The van backs itself up to turn out of the garage. The fuel canister clatters to the ground as it pulls away. Before it clears the view of the camera, the Black-suited Venlil is seen standing in its open back. He is holding what appears to be a flare gun.
The flare sails through the air shortly after the van leaves the frame and impacts the ground. It bounces and rolls until it touches the fuel and ignites it in an instant. A small wall of fire proceeds down the provided trail into the hallway, igniting more fuel as time passes. The hallway is quickly engulfed in vividly red fire. Thick black smoke begins to pour out into the garage as the fire inches closer to the primary fuel tank.
Movement can be seen in the hallway between the flickering flames. The silver form of a Venlil Exterminator is seen rushing out of the stairwell and fighting to head towards the fuel storage room. Before they reach, a white flash fills the screen. The feed goes dead, the error code consistent with electrical interruption.
(Specified Media Concluded.)

{Who was what? Mafchi?}

{Hmmm, there aren’t any tags embedded for them. The suits do a rather good job at making the officers anonymous. Let me see…oh.}

{The, uh… the employment records for that Office were…terminated.}

{It looks like…yes, here. Record wipe in 2497. Media with less than 1 bistandannual visit were removed to save space on the university’s central server. It’s…they’re gone, gone gone.}

{Maybe, but that’ll do us no good if we don’t know their name. And because of the chaos of that incident, nobody has been able to accurately reconstruct where every individual was in that office. We’d have to already know who they were to find them.}
<...I guess that’s another person I’ll have to remember then, huh?>
{...Guess so. Speaking of remembering, perhaps you should check out Tarlim’s view again? Seeing how we were just talking about him.}
<...Sure. At least people remember his name, right?>
(Command: [exitprogram])
(Are you sure? [Y])
…
{-Program Selected-}
{-Restart From Last Playback Point? Y/(N)-}
{-[USERID-11229KMD]: procViewHist -}
{-Retrieving Transcription Viewing History…-}
{-List Retrieved - Select Desired Subject: (Tarlim)-}
{-Restart From Last Playback Point? (Y)/N-}
{-Playing…-}
Memory Transcription Subject: Tarlim, the Venbig. Date [Standardized Human Time] October 31st, 2136
No matter how much Sven and Anso griped about it, having them leave and return with the trailer was a great idea. The humans who had gone with them the first time were, to my dismay, excited to try and ride in the back. I had at least been able to impress on those four that I couldn’t let anyone else ride like that, and that they were to help with rigging a trailer with some seats.
I had to admit; they did a good job!
Several couches sat bolted to the floor of the covered trailer and even had some ropes that could be hooked across the armrests as impromptu belts. It wasn’t perfect by any means, but it would work as well as any bus or short train ride! Certainly superior to jumping in the bed of a truck.
I strode out into the parking road and swayed my ears to greet Anso. Sven had stayed behind here to meet with the humans and entertain the kids, a job which he was slightly less unenthusiastic about compared to last time. “Greetings, Anso! Have you made the necessary preparations for the humans to leave with you?”
The Yotul hopped out of the truck bed and bounced to me. “We have! I have to say those humans were great workers to have helped get this whipped up so quickly! I hope Sven has been behaving himself?”
I let my tail wag behind me remembering my last glimpse of him. He should really secure his sheath straps! “He has! Been entertaining the refugees while I made sure they all had their belongings ready to go. Come on inside, let’s go gather them.”
I guided him with a wave of my arm as we turned back to the door. To be truthful, I hadn’t expected Sven to win the humans over as quickly as he did. Needless to say, his primitive attire seemed to spark joy within them, a joy sorely needed amidst the sadness of recency.
As we entered the building I noticed something, or rather, the lack of something. When I had exited only a few [minutes] prior, the building had been full of life and noise. Now, it was almost dead quiet, save for the sounds of a holovision coming from the lobby. Rather heated sounds, at that.
“I didn’t think it was already main rest claw,” Anso mused as he, too, recognized the aggravated voices coming from the lobby. “And what are they watching in there? Sounds…angry.”
“Yeah…” I trailed off as I followed the noises. As I approached the lobby, the sound of what I assumed was a Gojid yelling. “You know nothing about my family. TALK, JUST FUCKING TALK, NOW!” My ears pinned back at the foul language at play, hoping that Sven and the children were somewhere else.
As I entered the room, I saw that I was only half right. The children were thankfully nowhere to be found, but Sven was obviously present, as was most of the facility staff. I was about to ask what was going on before another voice drew my attention to the holovision, the same as everyone else. The voice of none other than Chief Nikonus.
“There were three of us who laid out the groundwork for the Federation. When Kolshian explorers came in contact with the Farsul, more than a thousand years ago, the galaxy was young. We were the first in this sector to escape our gravity well. You know about the founding of this institution, but I reiterate it just in case.”
“The Krakotl were the third,” another voice piped up from behind the camera. I thought it might’ve been another Gojid, but the voice was far too breathy. Harchen, maybe? I wasn’t given a chance to consider it further as Nikonus continued. “Yes, they were a problem from the start; aggressive, disagreeable. We tried to identify the problem, and why they were so ill-equipped for spacefaring.”
“We learned they were scavengers, who would occasionally go for fish as well.”
His next line was rendered inaudible by the shocked gasps of both the refugees and residents in the room. I was no different, drawing in a sharp breath at the abrupt admission. I remembered that Arvi had said some aliens were revealed to have eaten meat in the past, but was this the way it was decided to be revealed? With such abject callousness?
Nikonus continued to speak, looking not just proud, but smug with his words. He went on about how the Federation had saved these aliens with their manipulations, but the entirety of his body language seemed to indicate he reveled in how devastating this information would be to the people he was speaking to. How they manipulated an entire culture, a RELIGION!
What if they did the same to ours?
That horrifying thought struck through my mind like a derailing train. I had relied upon the Tenets in some of my darkest moments. Found comfort in them when there was none elsewhere to be found. To have such a comfort revealed as a lie in its entirety, used only for some other group to control you…
The voice of Nikonus hit my ears again. “Oh Sovlin, I already told you. For the small minority of species who don’t find herbivory alone, we teach them the right way. Doesn’t the religion against predators sound familiar?”
The Kolshian was insufferably proud of those words. There was no doubt in my mind now; this was mocking. Mocking a Gojid for following The Protector. For being a predator. For being different, but expecting to still be treated as a person. The Gojid were predators, they couldn’t help it, and they were already being mocked for it.
What might happen to all the other species?
I shifted my focus away from the screen to the crowd, searching for one in particular. Vichee, a Krakotl already so different from everyone else, and now my concerns for them were multiplied with every word that fell from Nikonus’ mouth. Were they okay? They had come in here to see Sven, I had seen them. Where are-
I spotted Kaeden in the corner of the room. Next to him, slumped against the wall, was Vichee. The dual colored Krakotl’s eyes were glazed over as they stared at nothing. I strode over quickly, my instincts wanting to comfort them. Kaeden was simply standing there, it was confusing that he didn’t seem to be comforting Vichee at all. As I got closer, their head tilted up to me, regarding me with an unfocused eye.
“He was right.” They said quietly. My implant almost didn’t pick it up over the sounds of the lobby. “Kaeden had asked me soon after our first meeting if Krakotl had once been meat eaters. Said it was the shape of our beaks. ‘More suited to capturing small wriggling prey than filtering algae’. He told me. I nearly flew away right then… If I had, I would have been alone with this news.”I listened, kneeling down to be closer to their level. “You’re not alone, your herd is here. Right Kaeden?”
He looked over at me and nodded. “Vichee was there with me when Earth was attacked. I’m here for them now. Kaabra and Venik are… together, elsewhere at the moment. But they will be here too.”
I flicked my ears in understanding. “Then I hope they may help in hugging Vichee until their tears are dry.” I turned an eye to Vichee. “Please, I just want you to know that you are still you. What your body does has no effect on your personhood.”
Vichee still sat, their mind still likely whirling with the new information. They lifted their differently colored wings. “I’m well aware. This lesson I already learned. But thank you, I understand what you mean.” Kaeden nodded slowly and Vichee returned to their thoughts.
“There’s going to be trouble soon, Tarlim,” Kaeden stated gravely. “News like this? Nothing good will come of it. I can already tell this won’t go over well. Keep your eyes open.”
As if in response to his words, the sound of clanking metal hits my ears. They shoot up, pivoting to locate its source. There, dashing towards the door, was the armored figure of Sven. I didn’t know him enough to know how this broadcast would affect him, but running was never the best sign. I flicked my ears goodbye to my friends and rose, following after the metal man. In my periphery, I saw the television screen had shifted to show Rolem moving onto the stage. I would have to miss whatever it was he had to say, so ducked through the doors and continued to follow the sound of metal.
As I exited, I saw that I wasn’t the only one to see Sven’s actions. Anso was bounding behind him, shouting something I couldn’t hear. Sven didn’t seem to either as he kept running, but his gait wasn’t one of fear. He looked purposeful, sprinting in a straight line. A line pointed right towards-
Towards the observing Exterminator Van.
The metal Venlil didn’t even hesitate at the presence of the fence. He leapt up in a display of strength and agility, vaulting over the barrier and continuing his beeline into the van. It was like phased through the doors with how fast he moved. There were sounds of commotion that followed his entry, and soon two Exterminators fell out of the van. One Venlil…and one Krakotl. I wonder how Kalek is taking things.
I, too, cleared the fence with only a high step and reached the van, peering in to see Sven at the controls. “Sven! What are you doing?” I asked, the Krakotl officer shivering on the ground in my periphery.
“They got my girl!” He huffed, “She’s a Gojid, they got her, I can’t let them do anything worse to her!” He tried to activate the vehicle to no avail, but his words brought up something that I hadn’t thought much over. I remember hearing about temporary emplacements that were being set up. Paly had texted me about exterminators bringing people there. Her too. And that would mean-
-THOOOOOOOMMMMM-
The wind hit me like a truck and rocked the van I was standing next to. Sven even stopped trying to fiddle with the controls to see what had just happened. In the distance, near the center of town, an enormous black cloud rose into the air, the vestiges of fire still burning in the suspended embers. I couldn’t look away from it as my mind raced with horrible possibilities as my mind tripped over itself trying to concoct a plan of action.
I wasn’t given long to think before the radio in the van crackled to life, startling both Sven and myself. “Attention all True Exterminators! The truth has come out about the taint in our midst! For too long we have lived with its danger in our presence! If any of you still hold the safety of The Herd in your hearts, come join us so we may burn ALL the predator taint from this District! Rendezvous at Vulen’s apartment complex, we shall start our cleansing there!”
The name of one of my landlords sparked familiarity in my mind. They had been working to build a series of new apartments to add to his old, and if I remembered, had agreed to house the Gojid refugees. The Gojid! Paly was housed with them!!
In an instant, I reached into the van and grabbed Sven by the arm. He tried to pull away, but my grip was too strong. “Sven! They’re gonna kill the Gojid! They’re gonna burn Paly!”
He finally managed to shake himself free as my paws became jittery from stress. “I gotta save my girlfriend! She’s in a facility! I gotta save her!”
“But they’re gonna burn people here!” I protested, “we have to do something! We need- We need People who can fight them! Kaeden! I need to get Kaeden! We can save them!”
I pulled myself away from the van and spotted Anso nearby. He must have had to go through the gate, but this was good timing. I pointed a claw at him. “Do Not Let Him drive off before I get back!”
I didn’t give him, nor the Exterminators who had recovered from their shock, time to ask questions. Paly was in danger, as were who knew how many others. I faintly heard my data pad chime from within my shoulder bag, the signal my heart was beating too fast, but I couldn’t deal with it right now. I could get the heart rate under control during the drive. Right now I needed Kaeden, he knew how to fight! How to save people when others were trying to kill them!
My paws guided me and I was back in the cafeteria before I knew it. Some of the crowd had dissipated, but Kaeden and Vichee were still in the same corner I had left them in, but with their Venlil friends now joined. Without leaving time for protest, I grabbed Kaeden’s arm and pulled him away. I heard Vichee squawk behind me, but I was in too much of a hurry. I can’t let her get hurt. I Won’t.
Kaeden started to slap my arm as I dragged the soldier across the lobby. “Tarlim! What the fuck are you doing?? What’s going on?”
“No time, they’re going to burn everyone,” I breathlessly said as I burst the facility doors open to get him to the van.
“What? Who?” Kaeden questioned, still resisting my pull. I could hear a tinge of worry in his voice, and I knew he would understand. Anso looked back from his position as he heard my approach, and upon seeing me dragging Kaeden along, he grew visibly concerned.
“On the radio, something about True Exterminators,” I attempted to explain to him as we neared the gate doors. This time, I simply spread them apart with my free paw, metal screeching against itself as the gate was forced open. “They’re going to burn every cured species they can find, and That Means Paly. I Won’t Let Them.”
Kaeden had stopped struggling as I explained the bare essentials to him, and once we approached the van, he finally had enough sense to ask the right questions. “So what exactly is the plan to stop them? We’re strong, sure, I could probably take most of them. But just two of us against a wall of those flamers?”
“Not two,” I corrected, letting go of his arm and throwing open the back doors of the van. Still seated in the drivers side was Sven, who looked back once he heard me permit entrance into the back. “We have him too.”
“Wh- the LARPer??” Kaeden asked incredulously. I wasn’t familiar with the term he used, but his tone told us all we needed to know. Sven’s eyes narrowed at the perceived insult, but Kaeden continued. “Do either of you have any formal military training?? Rushing down there is only going to get you both killed along with the others! For fucks sake, slow down! We need a plan!”
“T-There won’t be t-time f-for one,” a voice peeped in from behind us. We all turned to face the source, and we found it was the Venlil Exterminator. They recoiled under the sudden gaze of our entire party, but they managed to continue. “I-I recognized the v-voice. It w-was one of the n-new recruits. They m-might as well be Y-Yulpa. If you w-want to stop them, it’s now or n-never.”
We all stared at them for a moment in disbelief that they’d willingly hand over that information to us. They were Exterminators, weren’t they? They should be allied with the voice on the radio! Kaeden, after considering the information, gave voice to my confusion. “And why are you telling us this? You’re an exterminator, shouldn’t you be trying to help them?”
“M-My husband is the Krakotl that was in the van with me!” They yelled back, stamping their footpaw on the ground in agitation. “I-I don’t care what his ancestors did a t-thousand years ago, I will not stand for those zealots burning who knows how many people! We’re not all the same, h-human!”
I was taken aback by their words. I had given up hope that there were any redeemable souls amongst the ranks of those silver-suited brahkasses, but living proof of the contrary stood before us. Their breathing was only matched by mine as my pad continued to chime in my pack. Maybe there’s hope after all.
Kaeden started frantically looking all around, his focused gaze falling on the facility, the exterminator in front of us, and the rising smoke in the distance. After a moment's hesitation, he growled to himself and shook his head. “Fine! Fucking- if you want to prove you’re different, you and your partner stand guard at the gate! They’ll probably try to send a division here, so keep on guard! And for the love of God, go ask for help if that happens!”
My tail wagged behind me as I interpreted what that meant. “So you’ll help us, Kaeden?”
He paused for a second, an agonizing second as he fully took in the situation in his mind. But ultimately, he nodded. “Let’s go, we can figure things out along the way.”
Seizing the moment, Anso quickly jumped into the van and pushed Sven out of the driver's seat, much to their visible frustration. Kaeden quickly hopped into the passenger seat, leaving me with the problem of finding a space that would fit me. I stepped over to the back of the van and threw the doors open.
The flamers and their fuel tanks were useless to us, easy to toss all three sets out onto the ground behind me. I made sure that the flamers were disabled first, of course. Just had to snap the pilot lighters and slice a hose with my claw. Even if these two said they weren’t like these “True Exterminators” I didn’t trust them one bit. I crawled inside the cramped vehicle and wiggled myself to close the doors behind me.
As I got myself settled, I watched as the Venlil Exterminator started to inspect the destroyed remains of their weapons. I squinted a glare at them and positioned myself so they couldn’t enter with me. “You two aren’t coming,” I hissed. “You know why you’re not. Try anything with the humans, and they will stop you.”
I slammed the doors shut as their expressions fell, just in time for Anso to get the van into gear. I curled myself up against the wall of the van, watching out the back window as we sped down the road. We were on our way now. On our way to save Paly and all the people gathered because their ancestors ate meat. My heart hammered in my chest, but I would need to control it for what we were about to do. I needed to focus. I needed to breathe. I needed to be calm.
Focus. Breathe. Calm
Focus.
Breathe.
Calm…
{-ALERT: Automatic Annotation Detected - Switching Transcription Subject-}
{-Loading…Playback Ready-}
{-Playing…-}
Memory Transcription Subject: Sol-Vah, Fleeing Predator. Date [Standardized Human Time] October 31st, 2136
My legs couldn’t carry me anymore. I had to keep going, but I didn’t have the strength. My pants became wheezes as my body struggled to keep up with the physical exertion of running almost halfway through town. I hadn’t even looked up before now, at least with eyes not blinded by tears. The pain of Mute’s rejection still stung in my soul, a pain so visceral it threatened to rip me apart worse than any Arxur. Protector, what did I do to deserve this? Is there even a Protector, or did the Federation just- just make that up?
I didn’t have time to think about that now, I needed to get to the office. From what little I caught of the broadcast, Nikonus had said they saved us before. I knew what it likely was, but…I was desperate. I just wanted to go back home and have him embrace me like he did before. The safety and love I had felt from him was still fresh in my mind, and if there was any chance I had to get it back?
I’ll happily take it.
As I approached the office, however, something seemed off. I could smell soot in the air, but not the kind of soot that came from our flamers. This was- was…dirtier smelling, as if the fuel had been impure. Upon looking up, however, I saw something that made my stomach drop. A huge plume of smoke, billowing up into the sky. It shadowed the sun itself with its immensity and hate. Did the Exterminators burn more drugs? Or…or…
I felt a renewed vigor as I started to run towards the plume, hoping against hope that I was wrong. As soon as I turned the corner, though, my worst fears were realized. Where the office once stood now sat a burning stack of glorified rubble, every single window in sight shattered and multiple holes in the outer walls. The building was split, it was as if a giant knife had come down and sloppily sliced off its front half to spill flaming debris everywhere.
I stood in front of the building I had once called my home, surrounded by screams and the awful sound of flames roaring. I knew now there was no hope of salvation, no way this could ever be undone. I would never be able to go back to the way things were, never feel the happiness I had for that brief time. I was doomed to this life, abandoned by my love, and forced to live as an abomination devoid of a home.
I suppose that’s all a predator like me deserves.
[First]- [Prev]- {Next Story!!}
You read it right: This is going to be the final chapter of "Of Giants and Journalists." With the conclusion of Sharnet and Vekna's adventure, we will now take the time to show how this announcement has affected our characters and the galaxy at large. We're excited to announce our new series, Nature of a Giant: Aftermath! This series will not be quite as in-depth temporally as Of Giants and Journalists was, mainly because not as much will be happening in as short of a time. Rest assured, though, there will still be plenty of action across the board! You just won't have to deal with over half the story only covering a week of time!
In that vein, we are also excited to announce we are working on another bonus series, one that was teased a long time ago, Venric Lawven: Legal Legend! It will be filling the gap for content while we work on the first few chapters of Aftermath to make sure the scenes are as quality as they deserve, but will have a reduced upload schedule to once a week to accommodate for writing two series at once. On behalf of both of myself and , we'd like to thank all of our readers for sticking with us on this journey. It's hard to believe this series has been going on for over a year in one form or another, but I wouldn't have it any other way! Thank you all again for your continued support, and we look forward to seeing you again with Legal Legends! And then...
The Aftermath!!

Previous case
We're back to business as usual at Orion. Sort of. I'll get into that in a minute. But first, I just need to put it out there that sometimes the clients drive me nuts. As much as I have an apparently irresistible desire to help everyone, some people really push it. Push it right off of a fucking cliff, that is.
I’m going to stop myself before I go off on an unhinged rant about the woes of dealing with the public. Instead, I’ll let yinz see for yourselves what I've been putting up with.
(If you're not familiar with what Orion Pest Control's services are, it may help to start here.)
We received a call from a client about mosquitoes running amok in her home. Since we had a few others to take care of that day, I informed her that the earliest that one of us could investigate the matter was in the afternoon. But because this woman is clearly so much more important than everyone else, her royal highness threw a hissy fit about having to wait like a common peasant.
I tried to be as nice as possible, “Ma’am, I understand that it’s frustrating, but there are others that called ahead of you, so we have to take care of their problems before we can take care of yours.”
The client huffed, “Okay, you clearly aren’t hearing me. There are mosquitoes in my house!”
“Yes, ma’am, I heard you. However, you are not our only client, so we ask that you please be patient and we will be there as soon as we can.”
I should also mention that this client talked out of the back of her nose, if that helps to paint a picture of how her cadence was equally as grating as her personality. “Okay, but do those people have mosquitoes? Like in their house, biting them and their kid over and over? My son could have Zika virus right now!”
Jesus Fucking Christ. I rubbed my temple with my free hand as I did my damndest to keep my customer service persona in place, “Again, ma’am, I understand that this is frustrating, but we have a wasp infestation and termites to deal with before you and those families want their kids to be safe, just like you. In the meantime, I recommend wearing bug spray or burning a citronella candle until we can get to you. We will be there as soon as we can.”
“You better be! And you really need to work on your customer service, sweetie!”
The client hung up on me.
I had to pace around the office after that one. Sweetie? Shove it up your ass, you entitled, snotty… You know what? Nevermind. I have many words to describe clients like that and none of them are pleasant. I hoped that she’d get mosquito bites in all of the most private areas of her anatomy.
It probably didn't help that I was saddled with some bitterness after the ‘dogging’ incident. I knew that there wasn't anything I could do about the mechanic other than stay out of his way going forward. And boy, did that eat me up.
On that note, I know what the mechanic is, however, even whispering the official title of these Neighbors is enough to draw them to you. I'm not sure if writing it counts and I'm not about to find that out the hard way.
Just know that if you hear wings beating from the west at night, hide and pray that you'll be passed by. Placing a line of salt on all of the doors and windows facing the west keeps them from coming inside. Once they set their sights on you, they'll never stop hunting you. Even death itself fears them. You'll still be running long after your heart stops beating.
But I promise, I’ll elaborate more on that later. I’m getting ahead of myself. Back to the case.
Reyna was at the point in her training where she could be trusted to deal with termites on her own. After I had the wasp nests taken care of, I set out to her royal highness’ home, and earlier than I’d told her, might I add. I will admit that I was tempted to dally a bit just to piss her off, but then I figured that it would be better and more professional to just get it over with.
She looked exactly like how I pictured her to look, complete with a weasley sneer that only the most unlikable of human beings are able to master.
“It’s about time.” She snapped.
I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. “Where have you noticed the mosquitoes the most?”
“Everywhere.” She said unhelpfully,
Her husband stepped in. “In the kitchen and basement, mostly.”
To make this call even better, the husband decided to take it upon himself to follow me around as I did my inspection, asking me pointless questions and giving me advice that I didn't ask for.
It got to a point where his hot breath wheezed into my ear as I shined my flashlight under their sink.
Stiffly, but politely, I asked, “Sir, can you please keep your distance?”
His wife chipped in, “Will you let her do her job, Curtis? It took her long enough to get here, and if you keep pestering her, it's going to take even longer!”
The husband puffed up and snapped, “Well, it's my house! I need to know that the person working in it knows what they're doing!”
They began screaming at each other. As obnoxious and uncomfortable as it was to have to bear witness to it, at least they weren't focused on me anymore. I shook my head and kept searching for the source of the infestation.
What I was looking for was standing water, which is essential for a mosquito's life cycle; you eliminate the standing water, you eliminate the infestation. The space beneath the sink was completely dry.
With the argument going on, I almost didn't hear it. An odd little sound. The easiest way to describe it was that it sounded like, ‘Kudo! Kudo!’
My head turned to follow it. That's when I noticed that one of the floorboards was slightly raised up from the rest.
I interrupted their marital problems, “You said that your son was sick earlier? Would he happen to have chills and a high fever?”
The client spat, “Yes, because some people-”
Not in the mood for her nonsense anymore, I cut in, “Ma'am, please just answer the question. I am trying to help you, I really am, but I'm going to need some more information in order to do that.”
She looked taken aback, her face bright red. While she balked, her husband answered instead, “Our son said he was feeling under the weather, but he does that whenever he wants to get out of something. You know how kids are.”
Good lord. Parents of the year.
“Have you noticed your salt going missing?”
The wife blinked at me, “How did you know that?”
I told them that I'd be right back and went to retrieve a cage from the truck. This critter is an odd one in that not only is salt not a suitable repellent for it, but it actually loves the stuff. It can consume as much as ten grams of salt per day. So if you find that the salt in your home has gone missing, it could mean that a False Egg has made a nest.
I returned with the cage and advised the couple to either move into another room or wait outside. Would it surprise yinz when I say that they refused? Not in the mood to argue, I just shrugged. Okay. Suit yourselves.
I set the cage up next to the lifted floorboard, took my salt off of my toolbelt, and sprinkled some inside the cage. It would placate the False Egg once I got it inside.
Using my knife, I pried the floorboard up. From behind me, the husband began to protest, but his wife snapped at him to keep still.
Meanwhile, my eyes met the beady gaze of a False Egg from where it hid under their floorboard.
At first glance, it looks like a white chicken's egg. If consumed, it causes the host to lay more False Eggs. That's how it reproduces. The telltale signs that you're looking at a False Egg include two dark spots on the shell near the pointed top of the ovoid. Those are the eyes, which they can leave closed to camouflage themselves. You may also notice two small holes at the bottom of the shell, which is where its legs can retract in and out. Mosquitoes follow False Eggs wherever they nest, though it's unclear why.
Generally, they're more of an annoyance than anything. However, they can cause flu-like symptoms in those that they feel threatened by, so they do pose a slight danger to those with compromised immune systems.
To my surprise, the False Egg leapt out of its nest and into the cage, tucking its legs back into its shell comfortably. Even though it didn't seem to have any intentions of moving, I quickly shut the door of its cage.
For the first time since I arrived, the clients were speechless. The woman had a hand over her open mouth while the man stared at the False Egg in a mixture of horror and disgust.
It wasn't until I stood up with the cage that the man asked, “What the hell is that?”
“The source of the infestation.” I replied. “I’ll take this guy out to the truck. The mosquitoes should follow him, but just to be sure, I'm going to ask that you all leave the house for a few hours so that I can apply a chemical treatment that'll kill off any stragglers. And your son’s condition should improve in a day or two.”
The couple didn't give me any trouble. They quietly collected their sick teenaged son, saying something about getting ice cream, then fucked off to do whatever while I dealt with the rest of the mosquitoes.
Once I was done, I drove off to release the False Egg somewhere where it could complete its life cycle away from humans. It is able to reproduce in any mammal. While forcing other organisms to lay eggs is bizarre and can be alarming for the affected individual, it doesn't appear to hurt the hosts, other than causing some mild abdominal discomfort. Once the False Egg is laid, the host goes back to normal, which is why we generally don't feel the need to kill them.
Unexpectedly, the False Egg talked to me.
It had a small, soft, mousy voice. “Thanks for getting me out of there.”
I glanced at the False Egg. I had its cage on the passenger's seat. Its eyes were visible, along with its little white legs as it sat on the bottom of its cage. It looked up at me as it wiggled its small feet absent-mindedly.
Whenever it spoke, a small crack that resembled a toothy mouth appeared in its shell. That was something to add to our records: not only are False Eggs capable of speech, but their mouths are located below their eye spots.
Stunned, I said, “You're welcome.”
The False Egg continued, “Oh, those humans are vile! I hadn't realized it when I first made my nest. Do you want to know why I made the boy sick?”
“Why?”
So that's how I learned every aspect of this family's lives. I'm sure yinz care even less than I do about some suburbanites’ interfamily drama, so I'll just say that it wasn't bad enough to warrant a call to social services, but enough that I can see why that kid probably couldn't wait to turn 18. Overbearing mother, father trying to use his son to relive his glory days as a high school athlete. The False Egg had done the boy a solid, giving him just enough of a fever to excuse him from lacrosse tryouts.
“Where are we going?” The False Egg asked after telling me all that information that I didn't know what to do with.
“Back to the forest.”
The False Egg kept swinging its little feet, “Can you take me somewhere nice? If it's not any trouble?”
Why not? Maybe some scenery would improve my mood.
So me and my little egg buddy took a little drive to the pond. It was a picturesque area as well as a nice environment for a False Egg. They prefer caves, but as long as they're near water, they'll be fine. When I opened its cage, the False Egg hopped out, its little eyes and shelled body swiveling to take in the peaceful sight.
“Oh, this is wonderful! Thank you!” Before it skipped off, it paused. “I think it would only be right if I told you something that could help, since you brought me here.”
It turned, its shell splitting to form a mouth as it hesitated before speaking, “If you hear whispers in the woods, even if it sounds like someone you care about, don't listen. The louder they are, the safer you are. They get quieter as they get closer to confuse you.”
Hold on. That didn't make any sense. The whispers had gotten louder and more urgent as I approached the mechanic's clearing.
Unless I was wrong and he wasn't the one doing it.
I asked, “Is the whispering thing disguising itself as a mechanic?”
The False Egg tilted to the side thoughtfully, “I'm afraid not. It doesn’t like to pretend to be human.”
So there was something else out there with me when I went looking for Victor. I remembered then that the whispers had stopped once I got close to the mechanic's clearing. When I unintentionally allowed them to lead me astray, they took me in the opposite direction of where he'd been waiting. Interesting.
With the False Egg wandering off to establish a new nest that was far away from humans, I headed back to the office, unsure of how to feel about the information it had given me.
Victor looked annoyed when I came in. The clients had called to complain about my ‘poor customer service.’ Wow. Okay.
“Next time, just leave the False Egg there.” Victor said, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “They want to complain about poor customer service? We can show them bad service!”
“It's fine, Vic.” I replied. “Just let them leave their one star Google review and move on.”
“These fucking people…” He grumbled.
Victor's headspace hasn't been much better than mine. He's been pretty much stuck waiting by the phone for those ominous calls that the mechanic mentioned in the woods. They don't happen often, but when they do, he gets grim. Quiet. He hasn't told me in detail what has been requested of him. I don't know if he simply doesn't want to talk about it or if he's sworn to secrecy.
We'd had a long, uncomfortable talk during one of my days off while recovering from getting dogged. Victor stopped by with coffee and a box of donut holes. He drank the coffee, but left the donut holes untouched. We sat in my small kitchen, him staring intently into his black coffee, me quietly adding more sugar to my mocha.
I broke the silence. “What did you want me to see the other day?”
“I couldn't outright tell anyone that I was dead. Not without the mechanic finding out.” He continued after some hesitation. “It feels selfish saying it now, but… I just wanted someone to know what happened to me.”
Victor pulled the bandana aside with a finger, revealing that a jagged, red grin had been carved across his throat. I shuddered, being forcefully reminded once again how thin skin truly is.
He quickly pulled it back into place.
That prompted me to ask, “Is the mechanic the one that…?” I pointed to my neck.
Victor shook his head. I asked him who did.
His expression darkened, “Someone I used to use with. He didn't believe me when I told him that I was still clean and couldn't help him get his next hit. Everything happened so fast after that. Before I knew it, I woke up in his trunk. My chest felt empty. It's strange, you know? You don't notice your own heartbeat until it's not there anymore.”
I shook my head slowly, a knot in my stomach as I whispered, “Jesus, Vic. Where is he now?”
“He can't hurt anyone else. We'll leave it at that.” Victor muttered.
I took in a shaky breath. I couldn't believe that he'd been keeping all of this in. It was a lot to take in at once, so I could only imagine how much worse it was to be the one experiencing it.
Like I said, I don't blame him for what happened. He must've felt so alone.
After I regained my composure, I asked, “So… what does the mechanic have to do with this?”
Victor hesitated again, eventually saying, “He couldn't touch me while I was alive, so he made sure that death couldn’t get to me before he could. That's why I was trying to keep my condition quiet; I was hoping that I could outlast him long enough for the Reaper to catch up. Unfortunately, the fucker is good at what he does and knew that I’d drag someone else into my bullshit eventually.”
I shook my head, “I dragged myself into it. I could've just minded my own business, but I didn't. I chose to go out there, even though I didn't know what I was dealing with. And I chose to say the wrong thing to the mechanic to set him off.”
“You wouldn't have been in that position if I hadn't said anything.”
“So what happens now? You're just… forced to do these calls?”
Victor sighed, “It's either that, or I join the ones in the trees.”
The skulls. Grimly, I wondered if those trapped souls were still aware. If they knew what had happened to them.
I slumped down in my seat. “Is there anything we can do?”
“As of right now, no. We just go to work, keep our heads down, do what we have to do. And from now on, I'll deal with the mechanic, even if it's for something as trivial as changing a tire. He's my problem, no one else's.”
So that's where we're at. Victor's technically not alive or dead, but a secret third, worse thing.
Speaking of worse things, we got an emergency call in the middle of the night.
After we close for the day, Victor routes calls to his phone in case there is something that can't wait until the next day. Thankfully, this is an extremely rare occurrence; up until this incident, it's only happened twice since I've been with Orion. I joined Victor for one of those two emergency calls. Even though it's been two years since that night, I still hear the crunching of bones in my dreams.
Something yinz need to know about the farmers around here is that they know how to take care of themselves. They have more encounters with the atypical than anyone else and for the most part, they know how to live amongst things like the Neighbors in relative peace. They know about leaving cream out to appease them. They know about what measures to take to defend themselves and their animals. They're a tough bunch and they usually prefer to take care of things themselves. It's highly unusual for them to reach out to us.
So when Victor told me over the phone that the emergency call was at one of the farms, I knew it was going to be bad.
When he first described what the farmers were contending with, my stomach dropped. The client's brother was found on the porch with his chest entirely deflated, deliberately placed into a chair that was moved in front of the door where the family could see him.
The farmers were holed up in their home. The woman of the house was pregnant, due within the next few days, which made moving her extremely difficult. They could hear whatever killed the brother giggling and tapping on the windows, mocking them. Victor was already on his way there.
I arrived with my toolbelt along with a shotgun and shells filled with rock salt. This may sound ridiculous, but I also donned a collar that I'd made last summer by hammering long ass carpenter nails into the leather, then coating their pointed tips with silver. I looked a bit like a goth club reject, but when dealing with things that like to go for the throat, you gotta put your pride aside.
Victor's truck was in the driveway, but he was nowhere in sight. Shotgun at the ready, I glanced around as I approached the house. The body was still on the porch, untouched after the poor man had been posed there. It looked far worse than what Victor had described. His chest had caved in, like everything inside of him had been sucked clean out. His face was frozen in surprise rather than horror or pain. He'd been caught off guard and was dead long before he could react.
Wings. I turned, pulling the trigger just in time as the pest tormenting this family dove at me. It tumbled to the ground with an enraged shriek.
It appeared to be a woman. Well… half of one. Her legs were gone, brown entrails dangling sickeningly from her gray torso. Her leathery, hooked wings trembled as she used her bony arms to raise herself up to snarl at me, curling her lips to reveal doglike fangs. I shot at her again. She jolted as the shell took a chunk out of her skull.
That wouldn't kill her. Both her and I knew it. She skittered like a cockroach, an elongated tongue shooting out of her mouth, quick as a whip. I flinched, turning my head so she couldn't reach my face, grateful for the collar as I felt the proboscis slam into its spikes. The impact knocked me off balance, causing me to stumble. I leaned into it, hitting the ground and out of reach of the next swipe of her tongue.
I took aim again, knocking her back a few feet. A dark shape suddenly appeared from the barn, a glint of metal shining in the figure’s hand. Victor.
“I can't find the lower half.” He hissed when I was in earshot.
That meant we were going to have to keep her from rejoining the lower half of her body until sunrise. It was three in the morning.
Because nothing can ever be easy.
Victor had found chains and a padlock in the barn. They should be heavy enough to restrain her. We’d just have to get close. Without her sucking our insides out, preferably.
She was back in the air. I took another shot. I'd have to reload soon. I hoped that I'd have enough shells to last the next two hours. At the rate I was going, I'd burn through them in the next ten minutes.
Unfortunately, I missed as she soared towards the house. I used my last shot and thankfully knocked her out of the air. As I hurriedly reloaded, Victor rushed towards the fallen creature, kneeling on her chest to keep her from taking off again as he fought to get the chain around her.
I heard him make a terrible choking sound, followed by her retching. She'd gotten her proboscis down his throat, but had withdrawn it even quicker than she had gotten it down. I guess undead viscera doesn't taste very good.
As she gagged, Victor pressed his forearm against her throat, pinning her so that she couldn't sink her fangs into him. I raced over, setting the shotgun on the ground next to me so that I could help him restrain her. While he held her, I coiled the chain around her squirming torso.
She began to laugh. When she spoke, it sounded like an old woman and a young girl speaking in unison, “Do you think a chain will be enough to stop me?”
I kept going. She wiggled one wing out from beneath her, jabbing the hook into the hollow of my shoulder. I gasped as it pressed deeper into my skin. Victor roughly pushed her wing back down, the violent withdrawal of the hook making me see stars. Through all of that, I still kept going.
We turned her onto her side so that Victor could pin her wings against her back. She screeched the entire time, the proboscis shooting back to slap him in the cheek.
We almost had her. Then we heard a wail from inside the house. What now?!
The pest abruptly paused in her struggles to leer at us, then she sang, “The baby's coming!”
You've got to be kidding me.
Her fighting resumed with far more force than before. That man that she'd killed had merely been an appetizer for her. The baby was her true prize. Her eyes were wild with excitement, saliva dripping off of her fangs as she watched the front door open.
Shitshitshit!
“Go back inside!” Victor shouted as we both used all that we had to try to keep the pest in place.
The farmer yelled back, distress making his voice higher, “Something's wrong! I have to get her to the hospital!”
I risked a glance. The woman was white as a sheet, holding onto her husband for dear life as he half led half dragged her to his truck. Blood stained the inside of the woman's legs.
At the sight of it, Victor froze. I didn't like the way he looked at the woman then. Oh no. The creature went into a complete frenzy. She managed to get her fangs into Victor's arm, wrenching a cry of agony from him as she ripped a sizable chunk of flesh out. His hold on her loosened just enough that she could wriggle a wing out.
I screamed as I felt her beginning to slip away, frantically reaching for the nearest part of her, which was unfortunately her dangling intestines. It was like trying to hold onto oversized wet noodles, my hands slipping in her chunky blood as I struggled to slow her down.
They just needed to reach the truck. We just had to keep her here just long enough for them to get a head start.
I just hoped that I wouldn't end up having to protect them from my boss, too.
She roared as she turned and slashed me across the brow with one of her clawed fingers. My vision went dark in my right eye. Numbly, I wondered if she ripped my eye out, or if it was just from the pain. By some miracle, I didn't let go.
Fortunately, the bite seemed to snap Victor out of whatever had happened to him when he saw the woman’s blood. At least for the moment. He scrambled across the ground, seizing my shotgun. His first shot missed. The second one hit her left wing. The farmer had the truck's passenger side door open as he helped his wife inside. The pest reached a talon towards them, trying to drag herself closer. Victor was back on his feet and marched over to shoot her in the head. Once. Twice.
The truck's engine roared to life. With it, the pest screeched in rage, the sound warped by the damage done to her mouth after Victor had unloaded on her. She flailed as she watched her prize speed down the road.
But it wasn't over. The gunshot wound in her wing was already closing up. It wouldn't take her long to catch up to them if we lost her.
My cheek was wet. Turns out, I didn't lose an eye. I just had blood in it. Thank God. I crawled over her, trying the chains again as Victor went back to holding her wings against her body.
She called him every foul name in the book, words slurring from her destroyed jaw. One of them touched a nerve: “Bitch of the Wild Hunt.” He wordlessly snatched the salt from my belt and poured it over her face, holding her jaw to shove the container into her mouth. She gurgled and started to convulse as the salt was forced down her throat. That shut her up.
With the chain pinning her arms and wings against her body, Victor dug the padlock out of his pocket, using it to secure the links.
“I’m going to try to get her to the barn.” He yelled over the sound of her agitated howls.
I retrieved the shotgun and followed him as he carried the squirming, shrieking pest towards the barn. I pressed the palm of my hand to the cut on my brow. A flutter of unease went through my gut as it occurred to me that I could be in danger from Victor as well.
It didn't help that the pest had noticed it, too. She was goading him, “That girl smells sweet, doesn't she?”
“You want more salt in your mouth?” He threatened flatly. “We got plenty and we have some time until sunrise.”
She cackled, “You can't tell me that your mouth isn't watering thinking of her soft flesh between your teeth. Her blood warming your tongue. You long to feel warm again, don't you, dead man?”
The borderline pornographic way that she spoke about devouring me made me intensely uncomfortable.
“Keep it up and I'll pack the salt up your nose, too.” Victor retorted.
Once we got to the barn, we found an empty stall, which he tossed her into. I didn't follow him into the stall. My gut was telling me that something was off.
He drew a circle of salt around her. As long as it wasn't broken, it would trap her until sunrise.
I didn't think the boss would ever intentionally hurt me. But the way he looked at that woman…
What if he couldn't control himself?
Victor shut the stall door behind him, leaving the pest to wail and swear at us from her prison.
His eyes went to my forehead, “That looks like it hurts.”
I swallowed back the lump in my throat. There it was again. That look.
“Stay back, Vic.” I said calmly, my unease growing.
He took a deep breath, his eyes closing. I took a small step away from him, towards the exit to the barn.
I kept my voice even, “Vic, be honest with me. Is it safe to be around you right now?”
Victor stayed where he was, still not looking at me. He eventually answered, “Probably not.”
I took another step towards the door. “I'm going to leave.”
He nodded, eyes still shut, “I think that would be best. I'll make sure that she stays in the stall.”
As I backed towards the door, afraid to turn my back on him, I said, “I'll uh… see you at work tomorrow.”
“Yeah. See ya.”
I didn't dare turn my back on him until I'd left the barn. He didn't move a muscle the entire time. As I made my way back to my G6, I kept looking over my shoulder. Victor didn't follow me. I made it back to my car without incident.
I thought back to when I'd found him in the butcher shed. Looking back, I'm pretty sure that he'd been eating it.
Once I was in my apartment, I quickly drew lines of salt in front of all my doors and windows. It made me feel somewhat safer. I inspected the injuries on my forehead and shoulder. After cleaning them both up, I determined that I should probably see a doctor in the morning. In the meantime, I covered them both with gauze.
I painfully settled down onto my bed, my entire body aching. Even though I felt like a dish towel that had been wrung out over and over again, I knew that I wasn't going to be getting much sleep. My mind was racing too much.
Against my better judgment, I ended up texting Victor, ‘Are you a draugr?’
His response was, ‘i think so’
Draugr are known for their grotesque appetites. The joke Reyna and I had been making about him being a ‘high-functioning zombie’ wasn't all that far off, after all.
I reminded myself that Victor wasn't a complete monster. He'd at least had enough control over himself not to hurt me or either of the farmers. But the temptation had clearly been there. That begged the question of what his limits were.
Was it safe to work with him? Injuries aren't exactly uncommon at Orion. Maybe that's why he's been sending Reyna and I together for two person jobs rather than going on calls with us.
I received another message from him, ‘if you want to quit I understand’
I didn't, though. As stressful as working here can be, I do enjoy my job, weirdly enough. I've been treated better here than by any other employer and I like having only two other coworkers to worry about, especially since I get along well with both of them. But the biggest reason why quitting hasn't occurred to me is that I wouldn't be able to just walk away from all that I'd learned about the atypical cases. There was no way I could live a normal life after working at Orion.
I also wanted to keep an eye on Victor. Between whatever the mechanic was forcing him to do and his transformation, there was a lot that I was concerned about. As much as I didn't want to think about having to trap or kill Victor, if it came down to it... I'd do what needed to be done.
I sent back, ‘hazard pay? 👀’
His reply was, ‘😒’
A moment later, I received, ‘we'll discuss it when I don't have a manananggal mf'ing me’
Yinz see why I kept calling her a ‘pest’ rather than trying to type that long name out each time? I guarantee I would have misspelled it several different ways.
When the sun rose, I received another message from Victor, ‘it's over. thanks for your help’
We found out later in the afternoon that the hospital had been able to save the farmers’ baby. She was going to have to stay longer in the hospital, but otherwise, she and their newborn daughter were alright.
What was alarming was that the dead man's body had been desecrated at some point after I left. It was believed that the pest had been the one to take chunks out of his neck, shoulder, and chest. I wasn't going to be the one to tell the family the truth. They'd been through enough already without the news that the one they'd relied on for protection had gotten hungry.
I wondered if being exposed to so much blood had been the trigger. I suppose I should just be glad that Victor had eaten a man who was already dead instead of me or another living person.
Like I said, I'm going to have to keep an eye on him. In the meantime… maybe don't demand to speak to the manager.

Hi everyone!
We're a couple of die-hard Disney fans who absolutely love visiting all the Disney parks. Over the years, we've picked up tons of hacks and tricks that have made our trips even more magical. We recently decided to take the plunge and start our very own YouTube channel @livingthetheme593 dedicated to all things Disney parks!
Our goal is to share our passion with other Disney enthusiasts and create content that can help you make the most out of your Disney experiences. But to do that, we need your help!
What kind of content would you love to see on our channel? Here are some ideas we have so far:

• Park Guides and Walkthroughs: Detailed guides for each park, highlighting must-see attractions, hidden gems, and the best places to eat.
• Hacks and Tricks: Insider info on how to avoid long lines, best times to visit, and how to save money on tickets and accommodations.
• Ride Reviews and Rankings: In-depth reviews of all the rides, from classic favorites to the newest additions.
• Disney Foodie Adventures: Exploring the best snacks, meals, and treats at the parks.
• Event Coverage: Vlogs and reports from special events like Halloween and Christmas celebrations, as well as new attraction openings.
• Merchandise Finds: Showcasing the latest and greatest Disney merchandise, from limited-edition pins to unique souvenirs.
• Behind-the-Scenes Looks: Insights into the magic behind the parks, including history, fun facts, and cast member stories.

We'd love to hear your thoughts and suggestions! What kind of videos would you be excited to watch? Are there any specific topics or themes you'd like us to cover? Your feedback will be invaluable as we start this new adventure.
Thank you all, and we can't wait to share the magic with you!
✨🧡🚀
https://www.youtube.com/@livingthetheme593
P.S. Feel free to drop a link to your favorite Disney content or channels that inspire you!

Hi everyone!
We're a couple of die-hard Disney fans who absolutely love visiting all the Disney parks. Over the years, we've picked up tons of hacks and tricks that have made our trips even more magical. We recently decided to take the plunge and start our very own YouTube channel @livingthetheme593 dedicated to all things Disney parks!
Our goal is to share our passion with other Disney enthusiasts and create content that can help you make the most out of your Disney experiences. But to do that, we need your help!
What kind of content would you love to see on our channel? Here are some ideas we have so far:

• Park Guides and Walkthroughs: Detailed guides for each park, highlighting must-see attractions, hidden gems, and the best places to eat.
• Hacks and Tricks: Insider info on how to avoid long lines, best times to visit, and how to save money on tickets and accommodations.
• Ride Reviews and Rankings: In-depth reviews of all the rides, from classic favorites to the newest additions.
• Disney Foodie Adventures: Exploring the best snacks, meals, and treats at the parks.
• Event Coverage: Vlogs and reports from special events like Halloween and Christmas celebrations, as well as new attraction openings.
• Merchandise Finds: Showcasing the latest and greatest Disney merchandise, from limited-edition pins to unique souvenirs.
• Behind-the-Scenes Looks: Insights into the magic behind the parks, including history, fun facts, and cast member stories.

We'd love to hear your thoughts and suggestions! What kind of videos would you be excited to watch? Are there any specific topics or themes you'd like us to cover? Your feedback will be invaluable as we start this new adventure.
Thank you all, and we can't wait to share the magic with you!
✨🧡🚀
https://www.youtube.com/@livingthetheme593
P.S. Feel free to drop a link to your favorite Disney content or channels that inspire you!

Hi everyone!
We're a couple of die-hard Disney fans who absolutely love visiting all the Disney parks. Over the years, we've picked up tons of hacks and tricks that have made our trips even more magical. We recently decided to take the plunge and start our very own YouTube channel livingthetheme593 dedicated to all things Disney parks!
Our goal is to share our passion with other Disney enthusiasts and create content that can help you make the most out of your Disney experiences. But to do that, we need your help!
What kind of content would you love to see on our channel? Here are some ideas we have so far:

• Park Guides and Walkthroughs: Detailed guides for each park, highlighting must-see attractions, hidden gems, and the best places to eat.
• Hacks and Tricks: Insider info on how to avoid long lines, best times to visit, and how to save money on tickets and accommodations.
• Ride Reviews and Rankings: In-depth reviews of all the rides, from classic favorites to the newest additions.
• Disney Foodie Adventures: Exploring the best snacks, meals, and treats at the parks.
• Event Coverage: Vlogs and reports from special events like Halloween and Christmas celebrations, as well as new attraction openings.
• Merchandise Finds: Showcasing the latest and greatest Disney merchandise, from limited-edition pins to unique souvenirs.
• Behind-the-Scenes Looks: Insights into the magic behind the parks, including history, fun facts, and cast member stories.

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I'm not sure what I'm looking for, I guess just wanted to write out what I'd been feeling and put it somewhere. I'm using a burner account, and no real names, I just needed to vent this somewhere
I dated my ex (I won't bother with names) for 4 years, and broke things off last summer. Like all relationships it was complicated, but now - nine months later - I still have no idea if I did the right thing, and am left feeling rudderless and adrift.
I'm 41, she's 32 - we met online four-ish years ago, immediately hit it off and started seeing each other 3-4 times a week. We started dating in Jan 2020 ... two months later, covid hit, and our entire state was essentially locked down. We went from dating to basically living together after two months - which, at the time, was great with me .. we were in love, and things seemed great. My parents split up when I was 19. In my 20's and early 30's, I'd made some bad choices with romantic partners - and chased after people who were emotionally unavailable, fundamentally. It took many years of therapy and introspection, but I had been actively making and effort to only date people I saw a real future with.
She (at 28) had never really dated anyone before. She explained she had some very severe trauma as a child, and coupled with abusive parents, she had never put herself out there really, and had focused on work, and fitness, and school. Her father had cheated on her mother when she was a child, and she knew about it (from a very young age). I heard all this, and tried to be as empathic and understanding and reassuring as I could -> after all, it wasn't anything she had done, and I thought she was a badass for overcoming that kind of abuse. We hit it off straight away, and seemed to have tons in common, and those first few months together were incredible. She still lived at home, with her parents - and for the duration of our relationship never moved out, or found her own space.
Things started to get strange when one day, I liked a female friend's post on Instagram ... this was someone I'd known for 5-6 years, and I was friends with long before I knew my gf. In retrospect, my friend's post was a bit thirsty .. your classic "I'm powerful, self possessed" look-at-me photos that showed a bit too much skin - and I should have just kept browsing, but I tapped 'like' (one of probably 20 posts I liked that day from all kinds of different friend) and moved on.
A few hours later, my gf called me, furious, and accused me of using her 'as a place holder' because - in her mind - I obviously REALLY wanted to be with this other friend of mine, and was using her. This came completely out of left field to me, and we had a 2-hour phone argument where I apologized, told her I'd remove the 'like', whatever she wanted. She kept circling back again and again that it was "totally normal" to go through a partners friend list / liked posts because "anyone can see them, they're public". We went back and forth, I was frantic and after we got off the phone, I went through my Instagram and basically purged any attractive female friend I had, and removed any likes I had to any post that might be weird or suspect. From them on I rarely used social media at all - but every few months my ex would find a new friend on my social media she didn't like, or suspected - even after I stopped interacting with social media at all.
This same sort of low-level suspicion persisted throughout our relationship. If I was looking at my phone, she wanted to know what I was reading, who I was talking to, etc. I have never cheated on a partner in my life, in fact I had been cheated on twice - so the sort of dull, constant suspicion really upset me - and after a while it almost felt like she was trying to manifest / discover some kind of secret infidelity. The tragic part is that we got along great otherwise, she loved my (male) friends, loved my family, and we had a relaxed and loving relationship besides occasional flare ups. But the suspicion never went away, or changed - and this sort of underlying insecurity was a constant background white noise of our relationship. She especially took a disliking to my roommates girlfriend, and made it a point to always talk about how much she disliked her, how they weren't going to last - etc (I can't say I blame her, the girl in question was not awesome .. but I never understood why his g/f should have such an outsized effect on our relationship). Despite all this, I thought she was an a kind, empathic, intelligent woman - and I saw a life with her, I saw starting a family with her - as real possiblities.
She grew very attached to my family, which also started to make me wonder what was going on. Many times, first thing in the morning, before coffee or anything else, she'd ask me "how's your mom? how's your dad?" - and would always want to know if she was 'still their favorite'. The first few times I thought it was charming - but it kept going on, to the point I had to push back and ask her "hey, please stop asking me first thing in the morning about the status of my family" ... for reference, I lived on the opposite side of the country from them, and would only get to see them for the holidays (which she was always invited to). I had a very challenging period of my life with my family, from 15-30 my family was fractured, my parents split up, it was messy ... but through years of effort, and time and patience forgiveness, I had built strong, loving relationships with both my parents individually, and my siblings besides. I sometimes got the sense that she even loved my family more than me, and that I was - weirdly - almost an obstacle between her and them. I told her as much, that sometimes I almost was jealous of how much she loved them, and wished that she could point that in my direction sometimes - knowing that they would be part of the package. She never did that same work with her own family - who were deeply dysfunctional, combative and sometimes outright hostile to one another. As crazy as it sounds, I often felt like she was almost trying to reap the rewards of the many years of hard work I had done - without an appreciation for how hard it had been to build new, adult relationships with my parents.
After a year and a half she found a new job, in a new industry, at a high profile company - and for the first six months she was there, she seemed to be able to manage the stress. I asked her if she wanted to maybe find a place together, to move in together for real ... but she kind of brushed it off. I would ask her again every few months, and would be met with the same sort of half-maybe-sorta-we'll-see ...
She suffered a major concussion two years into our relationship, which is when things really started to change. She never went to therapy, or saw a doctor to get treated ... and as the months went by, she became obsessed, almost addicted, to her job. It was all-consuming for her, and occupied all her thought and effort and time ... our relationship became an afterthought, and would mostly be relegated to her staying over (because my apt was closer to her office than her parent's house) - then me cooking her breakfast and seeing her off in the morning - and getting take out when she got back at night. She became more and more locked into her job, and our relationship became more and more platonic and less and less romantic / sexual... which is not uncommon when people are stressed out, or exhausted - but we couldn't seem to find time or space to fix what was happening. We talked, and communicated - but her reaction to stress was to go inside herself, and cut the world off -> and my stress reaction has often been the same.
We grew more and more distant over the next year, I also got a new job that ate up a ton of my time, so we would only see each other for an hour or two in the evenings, or on the weekends when we were up for it. I have a habit of pushing the people I care about away when I am not doing well emotionally .. it's the biggest recurring issue I've had in my life. I've been to therapy for it, and have ways to manage stress including meditation, exercise and a healthy diet - all of which allow me to function. But as the months went by, I got more and more stressed out as we became more distant - and I started to fall apart, and started to feel more and more alone and isolated. I'm sure I could have been better, or more attentive, or more patient ... and I in no way want to trying to pin any blame on her. After all, I'm just 1/2 of the relationship, and 1/2 of the story. After not seeing each other for a few weeks, I had to go out of town for a week for my job - to deal with a long and stressful convention ... and when I came back, we didn't see each other for another week.
I wanted her to come see me, but couldn't come out and say it ... I wanted her to intuit my needs, which she OF COURSE was not able to do. She wanted me to tell her I desperately wanted to see her, which she couldn't articulate because she wanted ME to intuit her needs ... and round and round it went. Lack of communication.
We did see each other eventually, what started as a small disagreement blew up. It started after my ex starting talking about my roommate's girlfriend, or she said something nasty about her. I was upset because we hadn't seen each other in weeks, why would this girl be the first thing on her mind? What about us? I totally overreacted and pushed her away - it was a long and stupid argument, where we both ended up dredging up things from months and years before .. we broke up, she left. In my self-righteous indignation, I felt justified in the moment ... but as the hours passed, and days passed, I was miserable and knew I had made a horrible mistake. My friends at the time told me I'd done the right thing, and that we had long standing issues that I had been mentioning throughout our relationship ... she liked her well enough, but wanted me to be happy, and told me that I had, ultimately, done what I thought was right at the time - and not to doubt myself. But I did, I got fully stuck in my head about it - and was desperate (yes, the D word) to try again.
Over the next few weeks she totally ignored me, wouldn't respond to my calls, or messages. I didn't expect her to - but I practically begged her to give it another chance with me. But she had totally shut down, and in her (later) words "she was never going to speak to me again." She did, eventually, after a few weeks, respond to me. We talked, I apologized, tried to explain that she was the world to me, and I knew I had made a massive mistake, and desperately wanted a chance to try again - to make things right.
She agreed, eventually. We met up for dinner, and slowly talked things out - I was still honestly pretty upset, but we kept seeing each other, started making it a point to go on dates, to get to know each other again. She believed I had cheated on her, that I had met another woman and that this had all been a pretext ... I caught her going through my phone after I got out of the shower. There was nothing to find, but I couldn't believe that she still, after years together, suspected I had been unfaithful to her. But that was just a bump in the road, we talked it out. Things seemed to be getting better. We shared an amazing thanksgiving together, and I genuinely felt like we had turned a corner and were as close as we had ever been ... so did she.
The next Monday, at work, she got another concussion - worse than the first. From this point on, her entire personality shifted ... Which I have learned, in the months that followed, is just something that can happen with head trauma. She didn't want to spend time together nearly as much, she fully retreated into herself, and her family. She wouldn't come visit at all anymore - even if I was willing to pick her up / drop her off ... she would only agree to meet for platonic dinners at a halfway point between our houses. She started seeing a doctor, a neurologist, doing PT work ... but she just kept seeming to get further and further away. If I invited her over, she was always want to know if my roomate's g/f "might" be there, or if we'd be alone ... and if there was even a chance this girl would be there (even though we could spend time in my room, or in the common living room without interference) - my ex would just stay home.
Six or seven months of this went by ... we kept sort of drifting apart, and it seemed like no matter how much I tried to communicate, or bridge the divide between us (which, to be honest, it felt like I was doing 3/4 of the work to keep this thing going) - we just kept drifting. After her second concussion, we stopped being intimate all together ... she was still convinced I had been with other women while we were apart, and demanded I get tested for STDs for her to trust me again. I let my pride get in the way, and should just have done it - but I had not been with or dated anyone else in the few weeks we were apart, and I couldn't get over that she still wouldn't trust me at my word.. after almost 4 years together, I still had to prove myself.
But I didn't, I was stubborn and dug my heels in - so our last potential shot at intimacy evaporated. We became basically platonic buddies ... we still loved each other, said we loved on another every day - but I always felt like I was chasing her, hoping for some kind of emotional connection or breakthrough or common ground that never manifested. By the time July rolled around, I was a total mess ... I felt completely alone, isolated, and like the person I knew and loved had drifted off, and there wasn't a way to get her back. For two months I said that I was really struggling, I was feeling really disconnected and that I missed her all the time - that I wanted to get back to baseline but didn't know how, and that I wanted her help or guidance. She said she felt like she was gradually getting back to where she started, but had no clear picture of how long that might take, and couldn't give me any kind of definitive answer if things would get better again - or how things might get better again.
It never happened. With another month-long work event looming on the horizon, and my stress levels climbing and climbing, I felt like I was on the edge of a nervous breakdown. Eventually, after one of our platonic dates, I had a full on breakdown, and tearfully told her how isolated I was feeling, how I felt like I'd lost her, and how I felt totally clueless how to fix things. She had no ideas to offer, no guidance on how to navigate any of this, and no suggestions how to get back to some kind of baseline. It all poured out from both sides ... she didn't feel like she could trust me ever since we'd got back together, I felt like she neve really let me back in. But we both agreed that that one thanksgiving had been amazing ... and we wished we could find a way back to that place - but had no idea how.
I told her I needed a month, or two, I needed to start seeing a therapist, I needed to put myself back together because I felt like I was falling apart. I told her I wished that we could take a breathe - and come back on more solid footing because I had fucked up when I broke things off before. I had come back from a place of sadness and desperation - and had not given either of us a chance to heal before trying to undo the damage I'd caused. I wanted to meet her on even footing, from a place of mutual strength and try again ...
To her, this was just me breaking up with her again.. which I tried to say "no, I don't want to lose you, but I'm fucked up and need to just right the ship a bit in my life because I am totally losing it ..." But, sometimes it doesn't matter. To her, I was leaving her again, giving up. I had no idea if she'd speak to me again, but I felt so broken I didn't know what else to do.
I took two months, without contact, and started seeing a therapist, started exercising again, got through my hell-month at work. I tried reaching out again to her, multiple times after that ... but I never heard back. A few months went by - I missed her more and more, I didn't heal or get better, I didn't feel like I'd done the right thing. My friends told me I had, my family was supportive - my friends especially have told me time and time again that ultimately, I did the right thing, that I did what was right 'for me' ... but to me, the reassurance didn't matter. There was a giant, gaping hole in my life that I had no idea what to do with. This was a woman I had wanted to marry, that I had wanted to life with, to build and share a life with -> and at one point, I know she wanted the same. I felt so terrible, and couldn't handle the memories of the place I was in, that I resigned from my job (which was ok, it was a horrible grind, that while it paid ok, didn't have any kind of upward mobility) .. and after a lot of thought, I moved back across the country because it was too painful for me to be in that place, surrounded by the memories - living with the ghosts. My friend group had been slowly dispersing, getting new jobs in new cities, having kids and getting on with life - and I didn't see a reason to stay anymore. I debated reaching out to my ex to let her know I was moving - but it had been months without a word, she had not responded to any of my attempts to talk to her, to meet her even for coffee, or to return the few things of hers I still had - and I knew that if I did reach out - it would ultimately be a selfish act, hoping that somehow she might say 'oh no, he's leaving for good' ... so I didn't. I'm still not sure if she knows I left.
I've been saying with family, slowly putting the pieces of my life back together. I'm taking classes, and plan on switching careers into a new field that I may actually am passionate about. I'll find my own place again in a month or two, but truth is I missed my family dearly, and have been helping both my aging parents with years of neglected repairs and yard work - and seeing my siblings and their families again after a decade of living on the opposite coast and getting to see them 'maybe' once a year around the holidays. Plus after paying insane rent to random landlords for over a decade, its been nice to have a few months of feeling grounded, and to put work into where I'm living. My family has been thrilled, and glad to have me around again.
But it's made no difference, really. I still think of her every day. Some days are easier than others, and I can manage to stay focused on classes and work and fitness - but in so many ways my life feels totally hollow now. I'm stuck wondering if I completely fucked up a good thing, and wasted what might have been my last shot at starting a family of my own, of having a real partner. I'm 41, realistically my chances get slimmer by the year. Or maybe I did totally the right thing, and I got out of a degenerating situation that had been nagging at me for months and months that something was deeply wrong. Or maybe it was somewhere in between those two poles. There's no way to know, and I'm limited to my own side, and my own perspective - and trapped in that middle ground of wondering how things "MIGHT" have gone had X Y or Z happened differently. I wish I had some kind of clarity, or certainty, but I don't.
I guess things are getting a bit easier, as the days and weeks and months go by - but its only by fractions of a degree. I miss her, or maybe just miss the person she used to be, if that person still exists. Head trauma is ... complicated - because the person looks the same, sounds the same ... but the person you knew, the person you fell in love with, isn't really the same person anymore. Its almost like, mourning the death of someone who is still alive, if that makes sense.
So here I am, taking it one day at a time, hoping for some brighter tomorrow, some slow healing or revelation or clarity that I did the right thing - but all I have are doubts. There's no closure to be found because all I ever got was silence. I've done everything people have recommended - focused on myself, focused on health and fitness, focus on learning new skills, on meeting new people, gone on dates, focused on family, focused on growing -> but it hasn't helped the giant, gaping hole in my life, and the never-ending uncertainty.
I expect no sympathy, or empathy ... and knowing reddit, I'll get a lot of people piling on to tell me what a piece of shit I am, lol'ing at how I fucked up my own life, and telling me she's better off without me. But then again sometimes even Reddit can surprise you with the insightful and thoughtful responses. More than anything, I just wanted to write this down somewhere, anywhere - to get it out of my head and my heart. Because the more it stews, the worse I feel. Thanks for reading, if you managed to make it this far.. its a long, messy, meandering story without any real ending. Will I hear from her again? Probably not. Will I get over her? Eventually I'm sure ... but what happens between now and then is anyone's guess. What ever it is, it'll happen on day, one moment at a time.
tldr; sometimes things just end - without someone cheating, or abusing the other person, or any real good way to sum it up. Life and relationships are long, complicated, nuanced and messy. Take care all, appreciate what you have while you have it, take it one day at a time