TL;DR - building I live in was sold a few weeks ago and the new owner terminated the existing property management contract and is terminating all leases at the end of the month. I was going to move anyway but I think they're going to make it difficult to retrieve my deposit. What should I prioritize in the remainder of my lease to better my chances of getting my deposit back while I still have access to the unit?
Hello! I'm coming up on the end of a 1 year lease in Des Moines, IA on 5/31. I had already found a new place to move to back in April, but my landlord beat me to giving notice by issuing a notice of termination by nonrenewal, which I later learned they'd done to all tenants to take effect on the same date.
That didn't affect my plans much, however in early May (right after I paid what will be my final month's rent) the subcontracted property management company notified us that the building owner had terminated their contract, and would supposedly be reaching out to schedule move-out inspections and return of keys & deposits themselves.
I had a feeling that was BS from the get go, and since the lease prohibited any contact circumventing the previous property management company (is that even legal?), all the former management will tell me is that they are not allowed to provide any information that could be used to contact the owner.
However, knowing my way around public records, I found that an LLC which owns and "redeveloped" the building across the street had bought my building this month. So I know the name of the company and its owner, and a business address that appears to just be his home (or at least, it's a single family house in walking distance).
Other than mailing a letter (certified or no?) stating my new mailing address and other ways to reach me, what else should I be doing while I still live here, and what measures should I take while moving out and after, in order to get my deposit back?
Should I leave my keys inside the unit and lock it behind me, or mail them to the owner's address? None of the keys are unique and I have tons of copies at this point, so I think it would be safe to keep one if there's any advantage to that. But what's to stop them from claiming I overstayed my lease?
The former management company took a video on move-in day which I plan to replicate after I move everything out in the coming weeks, I've downloaded my ledger showing having fully paid through May, as well as retained confirmation emails of all the maintenance requests I've submitted and email exchanges I've had with the management company.
I'm also pretty sure they'll be tearing the building down to have extra parking for the building across the street. Half of it has remained vacant and the neighborhood is "up and coming" with a lot of adjacent properties making deals to swap parking spots to meet minimum parking requirements. So, what the hell do I do if the building is simply gone by the time I get a chance to challenge this in court and there's no way to verify the condition I left the unit in?

Rocket Lab's major and fastest-growing revenue stream is its space systems business, which is enabled by its launch business. Space systems have seen an impressive growth from 4.2 million revenues at the time of Rocket Lab's IPO in Q3 2021 to 40.1 million in Q3 2022, 46.3 million in Q3 2023 and they are guided to reach 77 to 81 million in Q2 2024.
The space systems business amounts to 799.7 million out of 1.015 billion Rocket Lab's total backlog, representing 78.78% of the backlog. Rocket Lab recently announced a significant contract to supply 2,000 reaction wheels this year, a figure not yet reflected in the backlog. Rocket Lab has also announced the contract to supply solar cells for 150 million.
Given the substantial contribution of the space systems business to Rocket Lab's growth since its IPO, it is expected that analysts would focus heavily on this segment during earnings calls. Surprisingly, this is not the case.
Only 1 of 23 questions directly related to the space systems business (the question No. 13 on the progress on SolAero's margins - labeled below as "Pricing"). 22 of 23 questions were concentrated on other topics - here's the list of all topics:

• Neutron (7 questions)
• Cash (7 questions)
• Pricing (3 questions)
• Electron (2 questions)
• HASTE (1 question)
• Other (2 questions)

This lack of attention to the space systems business makes me wonder whether analysts are so overly fixated on the Neutron development that they are completely overlooking the booming space systems segment. They seem to be missing the forest for the trees.
This overfocus on Neutron may be one of symptoms why Rocket Lab remains so grossly undervalued. I'll discuss other symptoms in separate posts.
All 23 questions asked by all 8th analysts during the Q1 2024 earnings call are summarized below:
1st Analyst:

1. Neutron - you're pushing that out by at least 6 months, is it mostly on engine side and what can pull that timeline in or push it out further?
   
2. Neutron - the timeline on Neutron launches - is it still 1-3-5?
   
3. Electron - expected 6 launches in all remaining Qs in order to hit 22 launches. Can they still hit 22 this year?
   
4. Cash - revenue trajectory in 2024?
   

2nd Analyst:

1. Neutron - what are big milestones between the hotfire of Archimedes and the launch?
   
2. Cash - does 565 million include net proceeds of the recent capital raise?
   
3. Cash - what is the expected runway?
   

3rd Analyst:

1. Neutron - what caused the delay of 6 plus months? What went wrong?
   
2. Neutron - how much buffecontingency is built in to account for the delay?
   
3. Neutron - updates on the demand for Neutron launches?
   
4. Cash - more details on the guided 42% burn of the backlog? What the overall pipeline looks line?
   

4th Analyst:

1. Electron - how quickly the reusability can be ramped up?
   
2. Pricing - what is the progress on SolAero's margins?
   

5th Analyst:

1. Cash - how high can Rocket Lab take the backlog before having to walk away from some business?
   
2. Haste - do you see opportunities to increase the pricing?
   

6th Analyst:

1. Other - are there incremental products or services that can be productized and offered more broadly?
   
2. Other - is there an equilibrium balancing point where as a prime contractor Rocket Lab will "leverage" external subcontracting vs. wanting to bring things inhouse?
   

7th Analyst:

1. Electron - 11 launches would amount to a record year. What is the best guess as of a realistic range of Electron launches?
   
2. Pricing - competitors are failing; is there an opportunity to raise prices by e.g. 25% to make a more profitable launch for somebody who'd be willing to pay for it?
   
3. Pricing - you talk about demand being better but it does not sound like the pricing is getting better?
   

8th Analyst:

1. Neutron - did the Baltimore bridge incident impact the infrastructure timeline?
   
2. Cash - R&D was a bit low, is that just a timing thing and should we expect it to step up?
   
3. Cash - will the SDA contribution be this year, next year?
   

Source: https://investors.rocketlabusa.com/events-and-presentations/events/event-details/2024/Rocket-Lab-First-Quarter-2024-Financial-Results-Update-and-Conference-Call/default.aspx

Hey everyone, My name is Nathan and i own a marketing agency specially helping realtors scale their business with Facebook ads. I'm looking for a VA/ Salesperson that knows how to call up leads generated from the ad. I will provide you the script and training on how to call up the leads. You'll also have to manage chats across multiple accounts
REQUIREMENTS: US time zones American Accent Able to call leads within 5 minutes. You basically have to be aware and ready 24/7 Call . Follow up with leads Preferably people from Latin America or or North America
Compensation should be 10-20$ Per appointment booked.

I filed my original claim a month ago, but when I click on the link to "File weekly certification", I just keep getting this error:

You may not file a weekly certification at this time. In order to meet the work registration requirement for unemployment insurance benefits, you must register for work with NCWorks Online by visiting www.NCWorks.gov and creating an online account.
...
After you register or reactivate your registration, you may file your weekly certification on the following business day.

Problem is, I've already created an account with NCWorks weeks ago with matching information, but I still haven't been able to file a weekly certification. I was forced to reopen my claim because I couldn't file after two weeks.
What are my options here? Are there any known workarounds?

I am testing the configuration of multi-user machines by running virtual machines in hyper-v.
When I log in I get a screen with the message "To sign in remotely, you need the right to sign in through Remote Desktop Services. By default, members of the Remote Desktop Users group have this right. If the group you're in doesn't have this right, or if the right has been removed from the Remote Desktop Users group, you need to be granted this right manually."
If I do nothing for about 2 minutes this screen goes away and I am given the normal windows logon screen, and everything works as expected.
Steps taken:

1. Spin up the hyper-v machine as Windows 11.
2. Log on as a local administrator.
3. Install and run the get-windowsautopilotinfo script using the -online switch
4. After the machine is enrolled in autopilot, run systemreset
5. Log on with a user who is assigned a Microsoft 365 Business Premium (no teams) account

The machine is enrolled in Intune as expected, everything seems to be working except for that original error message that goes away by itself.
If I logout and back in there are no issues.
If I shut down/power off the hyper-v machine then after entering the username/password I get the message about the Remote Desktop Users group, with the same behavior - wait about 2 minutes and the message clears itself and lets me log in as normal.

Hi, This is more of a cry for help rather than a rant. I am Indian (its imp for the lore), just completed my senior year and got accepted into ASU on the basis of my 2nd choice of degree - B.A in Global Logs. My first choice was Finance, so when i got my acceptance offer. Not being admitted for Finance was a bit of a shock, upon inspecting ASU told me that i don't meet the requirements. What requirements you ask? even i had no clue back then. After more digging, I found out that they have a criteria that I should have completed 4 years of maths and 3 years of lab science ( lab science for finance, nice...) . From where I come from, u have the option to not opt for maths in the last 2 years of your senior years which is what i did. I took the subjects -: Economics - Accountancy - Marketing - Business Studies. And for some reason people at ASU don't want to understand that INDIA isn't the same as the U.S when it comes to education system. I tried telling them that i completed these requirements back when I was in 7th grade but unfortunately they only consider transcripts starting from 9th grade. So basically I'm f'ed and cant study either finance or accountancy cz I completed the requirements long before I was supposed to.
What i wanna know at the end of the day from you fellow Sundevils is whether i can talk my way into finance or accountancy, AFTER I reach uni and meet with an admission officer irl. Cz emailing isn't cutting it. It might not sound like it in this rant, But I've been at this little game for close to 2 months now.
CHEERS

God, there's so much evidence of this it's ridiculous. This all lines up perfectly.
OpenAI had a massive breakthrough and has been utilizing that breakthrough to accelerate their workflow. They got AI working on its own development on top of their team. And that's why they haven't released GPT-5 yet, despite it being well over a year since GPT-4. We all know they have it—training finished ages ago, and there's no good reason for them not to have released it yet. They just keep doing iterations of gpt4 over and over, and then on the side they just dropped these ridiculous updates...
Then, we suddenly get this demonstration, and have been getting demonstrations ever since, showing the Sora Video Model, and it's stupid good. Like, light-years ahead of the competition. It's straight-up magical at this point, so far beyond our understanding of what's going on with this stuff. Sora, unveiled February 15, 2024, it's so far ahead of everything else that it's very mind-boggling how they ever could have possibly gotten to that point so fast. It's so fucking good..
And that is exactly what is freaking all of them out big-time. Except not Sam Altman at first—he saw some amount of opportunity for humanity, mixed with seeing the power to be had, and how massive it would be if he came out the other side as a savior for humanity. So he embraced the breakthrough and kept going full force ahead. And he wasn't wrong to do that—it's his Oppenheimer moment.
China is going all in on it, that's for damn certain. Which means we have to go all in on it, safety and precautions be damned as they slow the development of AI down. Falling behind to China could potentially be catastrophic; we need to stay ahead. So of course the Pentagon got involved, working on a Cooperative Research and Development Agreement (CRADA) with OpenAI announced on January 31, 2024, to leverage AI for defense purposes. The military saw something that triggered them to get involved, and while they're helping with cybersecurity, you can bet your ass they're leveraging AI to the fullest extent for all their warfare. They kind of need to, or else we're going to fucking die.
Sam Altman has been looking pretty exhausted and always tired during that entire stretch. Now their safety department has completely disbanded. This just happened, and they all got hit with NDAs of one year on their way out, meaning none of them can talk about it or they lose their stocks in the company. So, Sam Altman, instead of recoiling in fear and horror during the lifting of the veil that they were witness to behind closed doors sometime shortly before his ousting, he went the other direction instead and embraced it and was excited for the prospects. That is all because they discovered AGI sometime around the middle of November 2023. And while some of the employees for deeply troubled by all of this and Disturbed and scared perhaps, Altman showed excitement and exuberance over it, hence the entire ousting of Altman in November 2023. And because he showed excitement, I understand why all sides felt as they did and they are rightfully justified. Just before his ousting, Altman mentioned in an interview how they were witnessing significant advancements and saw it as a momentous period in AI development, which he felt honored to be part of: "I can't imagine anything more exciting to work on, and on a personal note, just in the last couple of weeks, I have gotten to be in the room, when we sort of like push the sort of the veil of ignorance back and the frontier of discovery forward and getting to do that is like a professional honor of a lifetime. So, it's just so fun to get to work on that"
With the last update we got, it is very clear that they aren't showing us everything. The products are not quite what we were hoping for, but they are insanely good and enough to keep people happy. The shit they can do with the voice now is getting released to the public next month. It can sing, change vocal expressions, and do all sorts of crazy shit that nobody else is near. We all come to find out later that that was just the beginning of all these updates, we have 3D model generation coming, the dolly image generation that's integrated into it is phenomenal and can do consistent characters and it can do text like nobody's business, it's so fucking good, and then we have insanely fucking fast speeds for these models, you're able to speak to these models and get responses like right away just as fast as a human will respond it's not faster and that it's able to do that it's just so mind-boggling. Just think, you have like a fraction of a second for it to go and like break down everything that you said so have that all transcribed and then take that and then crap the response and then say that out through the audio model. And they're doing this all at insanely fast speeds the text generation is so crazy fast and it is now only half the price of what it was before. This type of progress is nuts, what other industry or what other time of history have we seen progress being made at this pace, there's no comparison this is batshit crazy. And it feels off because things don't quite add up as far as what they are giving to the public and what they very obviously have or should have AKA gpt5 something that is multimodal and is an agent that can go out and do everything.
For them to have all of that and yet not have a model significantly better than GPT-4 from a year ago is silly. They have a model, and it's GPT agents set up to code really well. They can tell these models to go and do things on the internet like creating various accounts, setting up the accounts with APIs, codes, and all of that, and then downloading all the necessary things and setting it up in whichever program. It's like these super assistants that are insanely smart. That's what we should have out there. If Sora is out there, then 100% we should have that, and that is AGI. It can do shit on its own and follow up with tasks and goals in mind. It's wild.
So, this next section is borrowing heavily from this Reddit post that was from February of 2024 in which much of this was predicted to a T. This post is so spot on, here's a link to it on an archive site
https://archive.md/rtZHg
It's like the methods magicians use to figure out other magicians' tricks. You look for what is required to be there and is (like the magician's hat on the table), and what is not required to be there but is anyway (like the curtain covering the space under the table).
But then there's the misdirection—the bullshit and distractions. A company with AGI is going to want to feed it as many GPUs as possible while delaying the AGI announcement. They'll throw smoke bombs, release amazing new products, and make cryptic statements to keep people guessing. Their actions will seem more and more chaotic and unnecessarily obtuse. Customers will be happy but frustrated.
They'll start releasing products that are unreasonably better than they should be, with unclear paths to their creation. There will be sudden breakdowns in staff loyalty and communication. Firings, resignations, vague hints from people under NDAs. And then, the military will suddenly take a huge interest, and all PR from the company will go quiet.
That's when you know it's real. When the curtain comes down, everyone stops talking, but the checkbooks keep opening wider than ever, with investors and state departments pouring in resources. Bottlenecks will be reached for multiple industries. A complete drought of GPUs, etc.
And I'm telling you, with everything we're seeing from OpenAI, it's looking more and more like AGI every damn day.

ANALYSIS SCREENSHOT
Hello FacebookAds community,
I’m in urgent need of some guidance or insights as I'm facing a sudden and drastic downturn in our Meta Ads performance that began almost overnight in mid-April. This change has significantly impacted my supplement store, and despite numerous efforts, I’m struggling to find a way to stabilize our ads.

• Our ROAS plummeted from a healthy 4.16 to just 2.47, severely affecting our profit margins.
• CPM escalated by almost 70% unexpectedly, jumping from $57.10 in April to $97.03 in May. (Currency is MXN)
• CPC has increased by 63% despite a slight improvement in CTR.
• Conversion rates across the website remain robust or have even improved slightly, which rules out website performance as the issue.

I've tried many things to resolve the issue:

• Extensive refreshes of our creatives and testing new campaign structures. - I've created dozens of images, videos, UGC content, etc.
• Broadening our target audiences to no avail, the costs continue to climb. - Also tried not targeting at all, turning on and off A+, targeting interests, Lookalikes, etc.
• Implemented new sales pages and updated our promotional offers. - I created several new sales pages with professional designs, bundles, changed the offer. However, then I noticed that the website is okay.
• Transitioned to a new ad account and pixel to test for tracking or account-specific issues. - Maybe I had some shadowban, but it didn't work either.
• Despite these attempts, our Total Purchases have halved compared to the previous month, and our business is earning 75% less than it used to.

Tbh I've tried basically everything y'all have recommended on this Reddit forum and I read all your posts, but I haven't had any luck so far, haha.
This sudden shift happened so rapidly that our attempts to diversify sales channels, such as expanding into Amazon FBA, are still in the early stages and not yet yielding profit. Given that Meta Ads used to generate about 90% of our sales, this decline has placed us in a precarious position. I mean, I do have some daily sales through FBA, but it's peanuts compared to what we were selling through Facebook Ads since I launched the brand.
I’m attaching a screenshot of the detailed analysis I conducted using Meta's reporting tools. It shows a comparison of key metrics from April to May, which illustrates the severity of the situation and backs up my concerns with hard data.
What makes this situation particularly perplexing is that the engagement and interaction rates with our ads have remained consistent. The ads themselves do not seem to be the problem, yet the increased costs are unsustainable.
Has anyone experienced a similar abrupt change in ad performance? Could there be broader changes on the Meta platform affecting specific sectors or ad types?
I'm all ears for any strategies, bidding tactics, or insights that might help mitigate this situation. Every day the ROAS decreases even more and I calculated that I have around 3 weeks more before I have to close the business, lol.
TLDR: Experienced a sudden, drastic drop in Meta Ads performance starting mid-April, with CPM and CPC skyrocketing while ROAS plummeted. Conversion rates are stable, indicating the ads themselves aren't the issue. Struggling to find solutions as Meta was our primary revenue source. Attached is a screenshot of our detailed analysis. Desperately seeking any advice or insights from the community on strategies to reverse this downturn.

Can smone pls mark my descriptive text from 40? The question: write a text abt an old broken object. Thanks in advance!!!! :))
The watch
Fetching in my grandpa's soldier's uniform's pockets, I found an antiquated piece of time: a watch of his, back from the Second World War. I desperately tried to discern it, but my body cast an eerie shadow on the watch that it made it impossible to even see the Roman numerals on the watch's interface. I clasped my fist, tenaciously, with it inside and then shuffled my way to the room's window, furitively, trying to avoid drawing the attention of my parents. I opened my fingers, one at a time, and revealed this incorrigible piece of history of my grandpa, but I found that it was worn out and in a miserable state. It was broken. The front glass had an artistic pattern of scratches, that I was incompetent of reading the brand's name, the golden dull case was apparently damaged and had etched wounds and the brown leather's threads of the strap, that sewed two layers of leather together and sealed them, stood sporadically erect like stubborn baby hairs after a dip in salty seawater.
I flipped the watch upside down and there were illegible letters engraved on the back cover. As I was scrutinizing it, attempting to read what was carved onto this opulent disk of gold, I noticed it was craggy and wasn't evenly straight. It was open that it looked like a crevice from the side. Before attempting to shove my nails in the crevice and opening it, I tried peeking into the intricate brain of this masterpiece from the ajar lid, but it was all dark. Black. Nothing could have been seen, even with the sun's light directly aimed at the opening. I felt rejoiced and more curious, for I considered it a mysterious adventure to discover the neglected for decades. I impetuously, but a little tentatively, hauled the cover and it opened, but with a simultaneous crack sound. My heart skipped a beat. I looked at the inside of the watch, but I wasn't seeing. My eyes were broad open and my eyebrows arched exaggeratingly. Did I break it? What was that crack? Oh no. I examined it and concluded that it was just because it was so old and decrepit that it didn't open smoothly.
The inside was dingy and dilapidated. Components were stuffed with dry soil and the smell was musty and noisome, that it tickled my nostrils. All I could see were thin metal strips half buried in the relatively large amount of sand, like plants hesitatingly growing to the atmosphere. I felt like it was necessary to open the lid, because soon enough the revolting scent diffused and was no longer there, as though releasing sorcery from a sacred bottle. I was bewildered. I didn't know whether to fix it and make of it a good use or to keep it as is, useless, but an unforgettable memorandum of my grandpa's corpse. I pondered in silence, considering its value that I could sell it, but I disregarded the idea hastily, for no amount of money was worth such intimate, although still reeking, object.
I repaired it.
Post receiving it, it was good as new. The glass was spotless and I could read 'Patek Philippe 1941.' The case was still damaged, because it was irreparable and the leather strap was sewed all over again. Reading the bottom lid, the letters were: 'L.J.C' which stood for Lieutenant Jacob Carlson. Although the repair made a hole in my bank account, that I may not recover from. This sole detail made it worth all the money I spent. I decided to keep the watch and use it daily, as an honour of my grandpa's corpse

Hello everyone!
So I'm planning to try and launch my own small business soon. I'm really new to this. I have researched and compared most well known POD companies. I live in cyprus by the way and I have come across that printify is the best option in terms of shipping pricing. Also provides neck labels. I would like to start off by ordering samples. If you have better suggestions please let me know. I was wondering one more thing.. printify does not have baby tee style in their catalogue and I wondering if kids shirt for example like gildan 6400B would fit like a baby tee to an adult?
Thank you!

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I I guess I'm looking for validation that this is textbook, and I am looking at this correctly. I guess that is the effect of being gaslit - you don’t know your reality is really your reality. But I am here, and asking for help, because I will need to see him for the next 12 years (our kids go to the same school). This will be in passing and at events, but I am traumatized, still recovering, and just scared. I am looking for some insights because I spent about 2 months trying to fit my story into a box of emotional and narcissistic abuse…. But it's not that....I see that now. If you are able to share tidbits of knowledge, or point me in the direction of more clarity, I would appreciate it so much. Thank you so so much.
I am going to write out the cliff notes. I imagine a lot of you can fill in the parts I leave out as from what I read on here, it’s typical.
I met him walking my kid to school. He walked the same way every day. Over time, we became friends, and I learned he was trying to leave his marriage. Once he did, the relationship happened fast – too fast. He seemed so 100 percent sure of me and it was odd. I often looked disheveled walking to school and tired….I am not sure what he saw in me. But, I felt sure of him too, but wanted to go slower. I tried to slow it down, but at the same time, didn't. I am responsible for that. I felt like a hamster on a wheel after a few weeks and was able to tell him that I need the weekdays for myself, for my work, and for my kid. He seemed to respect that.
But he often romanticized the first few weeks together....even in the last days.
Quickly, I started to notice the emotional dysregulation. There was a lot going on for him: moving out, going through the divorce, parenting, work….so I understood it. I was also still getting to know him. Then severe trauma responses and triggers started happening. They would lead to these large child-like reactions with a lot of tears and anger. I didn't understand it but knew enough to know he had trauma to work through, and perhaps was feeling it for the first time. Each time this happened, there was nothing I could say to help or get him out of it, he would blame me a lot and say I was the cause, and he expected me (without saying it) to be there for him 110% even though I couldn’t. And truthfully, I didn’t want to….I wanted him to be able to handle that for himself or realize it was an issue. I didn't have the tools to deal with it and suggested he try deeper therapy. He agreed.
When he first met with the therapist, she told him it is like a virus takes over his brain and he is convinced in those moments. That was music to my ears at the time. But that is the last time I felt that way.
After a few months of this cycle continuing, I started detoriating. First my mental health, and then my physical health. I couldn’t breathe. I felt like we couldn’t go a few days without him reacting to something small. I wrote in my journal many times “there's no amount of validation I can give this person.”
I didn't point it to excessive adoration and validation, I could not see that really, but if he texted me 5 things and I responded to all 4 logistical ones and ended with "love you too" I was chastised. If I was driving and did not respond to an “i love you,” I was called out for it. At the end of October, I told him I needed the weekend to clean my apartment. It happened to be 60 degrees that day and of course, I would have preferred to be outside, but I am an adult and could not blow off my commitment to myself to clean. That day he messaged me 18 times that me missed me. He kept inviting me out. I kept asking him to stop, because clearly I would prefer to do something else than clean, but needed to. The missing was excessive. I didn’t even know what he meant. We lived next door to eachother. That night, I had to work, and he was upset with me because to him, it was optional and I should have chose to see him.
There were so many moments when he wanted so much comfort I couldn't provide. We were both single parents. That kind of affection goes to my kid....and I couldn't give it to him in that way. He would even want the affection when he hurt me.
He would see my daughter freak out at me and then say that I don’t love her enough, and he would joke they are the same….
It wasn’t a joke?
As time went on, and his therapy went on, and he felt validated by the therapist, the blame came on more and never left. It started in August, and even when I'd get an apology, it would be for the impact (what I'm responsible for) and not his intent. He'd argue with me over seeing his intent clearly. I'd say I don't care about your intent, you're killing me. It didn’t matter, nothing did.
I never felt like we could repair any incidents. As the blame went on, I really questioned myself. I wondered if he was right. What if I don't love enough? What if I don't receive love well? I've been in therapy for 20 years and know I have limitations but I'm not an asshole…
I felt coerced a lot of the time.
I felt he wanted me to change a lot....he wanted me to be less blunt, more loving, more balanced, work less even though he was awful with money, have sex when sick, injured or mentally dead from the day, always be happy to see him, don't be affected by the trauma responses and don't try to talk to him about it, don't take space and if I do, prepare for some kind of punishment, love him and miss him endlessly, do everything together, if I am dysregulated, he wanted me to regulate with him….
I noticed I started taking precautions to keep myself dafe. I didn’t realize I was setting boundaries to prevent the abuse but I was. I’d say I was busy when I wasn’t. I wouldn’t accept or ask him to get me from the airport, knowing I would not be 100% happy after a flight and that would cause a fight (as it did). I didn’t ask for help, and when I did ask for help, I would expect the help to not happen. I did not communicate anything he did “wrong” (like, you said you would drop off quarters for laundry on monday….do you have them?)
There were a lot of moments we would have deep conversations and I felt like we were getting somewhere, that he heard me.
I'll fast forward to the end because this is already way longer than I wanted….and it’s sad that I know it could be so much longer.
In the last month, he reacted and blamed me for everything. There were at least 5 major incidents. After the last one, I told him I was done. It was really bad and left me spending $50 to uber home in the snow, when I could barley walk as is (I had a herniated disc in my back and could barley walk). That month, I lost health insurance, and after begging for time to just take care of the injury, he told me we need intensive couples counseling. I had asked to just continue our therapist until we could change. That wasn't enough. The next weekend he asked me to go to a Gottman weekend. I said I couldn't leave my kid to do that right now and needed to take care of my help.
After that snow episode, that was really bad, laced with blame in the unpacking, I said I'm done, I can't do it. I was crying uncontrollably. I was scared. I really did not know who I was speaking to. After an hour, right when I needed to leave, he snapped out of whatever mindset he was in and told me he'd do anything, that he would work on anything, to please stay. I had to go, I could not think anymore. So in desperation, the only thing I asked for was to go alone on a trip with my daughter. He was scheduled to come with us. I said I needed time just with her. He agreed.
And honestly, he held up his end of the bargain....until he didn't.
3 days before the trip everything fell apart. I worked 12 hours that day and at the end of the day, went to pour water in a cup at home. It was the only time we had together before I left for the week. He hugged me from behind while I was pouring the water (....remember herniated disc in my back). I asked him to please stop and just let me have a second to pour the water.
He said "there's no turning back from this" and got his stuff to leave. I was floored. I was so upset because I knew where this was going - the blame game. He left, wouldn't come back, and then continued to blame me for the next 2 days about how I was an asshole the days before, only spent time with him out of obligation (not true), and rewrote history. I had a stomach bug all weekend and could not eat, but still tried to hang out as much as I reasonably could, and that was not enough.
The water incident was Wednesday, Thursday he had therapy and reinforced the blame, and I ended up leaving without saying goodbye. It was a week. I wanted to believe this relationship could survive a week. But I was clear with him days before: I am working up until I need to leave Friday so I can have real time off with my kid. He was upset I did not find him to say goodbye, even though he made no attempt to make peace earlier. But of course, my fault.
That night, he claimed down. Was nice. But it was a trap. After 12 hours of him being nice in text he said he was only doing it hoping I felt remorse and realized how wrong I was. He told me over and over he wouldn't see it differently. He said he read the transcript of our texts to 2 therapists and his friends and it’s clear: I am wrong. May be important to name here that we are both in our late 30’s.
I said that I want to work this out and I'll talk when we can actually discuss it and I'm willing to hear his side but not willing to blindly take all responsibility. He nailed me on every response, telling me how wrong my response was and what I should have done differently.
I was with my kid and could not talk. When I said "why are you doing this now, you know I can’t really respond" he told me to stop avoiding.
That night, he ghosted me for the first time in the relationship and I panicked. I called him a few times. No answer.
The next day, despite him never doing that to me before, he called me controlling for calling.
At 7am the next morning he told me our relationship was over in a text. This man, who 7 days before was professing his love and understanding of me ended the engagement in a text. This of course continued with a back and forth. I asked him to please stop. To please pause and talk to me when i'm back in 5 days. He told me to fight for the relationship or it was over. I said “I am just waking up with my 7 year old, in a hotel, please stop.” I asked him to attend couples therapy in 3 days to talk this out. He said “you accept all responsibility and change your behavior or we are done.” I asked if he was willing to talk and he said the problem was my perception and that it's wrong, so unless I change we are done. I knew this wasn't ok but I was so blindsided I did not know what to do. He agreed to go to couples therapy Thursday. We barley talked. There were a few more messages of him telling me he needs to know I can live a drama free life and celebrate his love and see it all as beautiful (almost verbatim). At this point, all I wanted to do is keep the dial down. I pushed back saying, “I cannot teach my daughter that someone can just tell her that her emotions and feelings are wrong, I hope you will be willing to talk and we can get on the same page.”
He agreed to go to couples therapy, and then didn't show up. He texted me 10 minutes before saying he was not going. I begged and pleaded. But he had the couples therapist to tell me he wasn't going to go. He had her tell me. I lost it. I lost my mind. I had been reeling for days. Not sleeping. Putting on a fake smile all day with my kid while I was dying inside. Staying up late to cry, process, read, figure out wtf was going on…
I called him about 10 times and of course, he told me it was inappropriate. He then picked up and gave me 10 minutes. He again wanted me to take all responsibility for everything. I was so shaken, I just fawned. I said ok. When I'm back I hope we can talk but if you want me to accept blame for now, fine.
Everything was calmer for 2 days until we were heading back and he texted me something along the lines of "don't fool me" I was like wtf? He said "there's no turning back. There's no other chances." I was like wait what? And then it was "don't make me look like a fool" I had no idea what was going on. I was like "um what is this?" He essentially was reinforcing his stance: I am to blame for everything in the present and past. If I try to talk to him about his side I'm wrong. I need to repent and one wrong move (defined by him) is a misstep and there's no room for error (his words). I was like....I will be in a relationship based in reality, and I will own my part and parts, but i will not be in something that i'm to blame for everything. That is not healthy. I have also been in abusive relationships before.
He then stopped messaging me. Didn't care that we got into flight issues. Didn't care we made the flight back. That night he came over and was a victim. Claimed in the 5 days I was gone he found himself. That he wasn't focused at work because of me and now he is. He wanted to try to be together. I had no idea what reality I was in. We slept together. He left. And told me we'd talk the next day. All of this felt so weird but I was just hoping he would snap out of this and back to reality and we would be able to talk. But I also knew this had to end at this point.
The next day, he didn't answer me all day. This was the opposite of behavior I ever experienced from him. Did not respond to texts or pick up the phone. We had a training appointment and he had the trainer tell me he wasn't coming. I broke down in tears. I begged him to just answer a text. He didn't. He drove by me while walking the dog and did not stop. I emailed him, expressing my confusion, telling him this is not what we agreed to. He blocked me. That night I got an email from him letting me know he was moving 10 min away. He lived next door in another apt building. He actually assured me the day before he “was not going anywhere.” In that email, he listed out the calls and texts I sent and how inappropriate it was. He never said we were done. He said taking space, needing space…so in my head I was confused but see it now.
I was inconsolable. I didn’t respond.
But here is the issue I am still in: I needed to see him dropping his kid at school the next day. I will need to see him for the next 12 years unless I move.
The following Friday he stood next to me at a school event. I purposely stood in the back to have space and be able to leave if I needed to. He went next to me. When I told him he should sit, he said he didn't want to make it obvious to his ex wife. I asked him to speak that Friday. He said ok but he was moving. I cried instantly. Already? I said ok.
On Saturday am, I saw the truck pull up and left the house. I called him that Saturday. I was blocked.
The next wednesday he asked me for a series of logistics in a text. None of which I handled yet. Wanting me to cancel flights and settle up money spent together. No mention or responsibility for all the money wasted on tickets we will never use. But then…in the text, asked for my engagement ring back.
I responded to logistics. Not the ring
He then called me 3 hours later because something went really wrong in his legal case. He wanted me to understand and validate him. I did....I just turned off my feelings for a moment. At the end he said, so about the flights. Can you handle it? "If i cancel it for you and your son i also have to do it for me and my kid. It's all on the same reservation" "well if you can go and not make sexual advances on me then we can try to go together.” I was like wtf? I could not have sex for months due to my injury. But he wanted to. Was this way of setting up blame that if we DID sleep together I would be to blame? I was like “I will cancel it for all of us.”
He then ran down more logistics and I said honestly you didn't seem done. I don't understand what you're doing. He said "im done" i hung up the phone.
He asked me for the ring again that night in a text. I said no, I need time to process this.
Everything since then has been a transaction. If i have a genuine emotion, he gets upset that i have it at all. He continues to sit next to me at school events because he claims he does not want his ex-wife to think we are done (this is insane to me….). I realize now that if it is a “good” interaction he is happy. If I am sad, then it is a “bad” one.
He never told his son we broke up, and shamed me for telling my daughter.
Recently he asked me a question and I was annoyed, and he said "can you not be mad at me?" I said “no, I can't not be mad at you…”
In the last 3 months, he’s said "I don't want to confuse things" has come up a lot. I don’t know if he is saying that to me or himself.
I have been so stuck trying to understand how I could not take space at all from him, to being totally discarded. I know he went back to spending, and drinking, but I don’t think he is seeing anyone.
He only responds when he wants to. He ignores other things. I never was able to get an MRI for my back because the claim went through a DR he set up for me and he never sent me the info when I asked.
I got the money back he owed me, but still lost so much money.
He told me he missed me one time.
I don’t know who this person is.
I will have to see him for the next 12 years while the kids are in school unless I move. I am not going to move just to avoid him, but I need to heal so I can be strong enough. I don’t know if he is going to try to come back. I have been in therapy and am getting clearer about what brought me into this in the first place.
Any clarity you can help me with, on this, and what may come from here, would be really helpful. It will help me direct some of my searches and begin to piece things together to process in therapy. I have severe anxiety when I run into him at school.
I have never had to heal from something like this before. At first, I thought it was healing from a narcissistic discard….this feels like so much more.
Does it sound like he will want to come back?
Is there ever closure?

Color, all-in-one that doesn't glitch/suspend after not being used.

I've been looking at different Brother and Epson Ecotank models.
Priorities:

• color
• scanning
• "just works" -- solid firmware/drivers/software that doesn't glitch
• under $350
• works well with a variety of devices
• decent sized paper tray
• intermittent printing frequency

Minimum Requirements:

• Budget: under $350
• Country: US
• Color
• Laser or ink printer: Either
• New or used: New, 'certified' refurbished, open box, etc but not straight up used.
• Multi-function: scanning, printing
• Duplex Printing: nice to have but not the top priority
• Home or business: home with a little bit of business
• Printing content: mostly black and white text, kids activities, kids worksheets, forms, occasional photos
• Printing frequency: every week or two
• Pages per minute: not picky
• Page size: 8.5x11 (letter)
• Device printing from: iOS, Mac, Windows, would be nice if Apple's printing worked.
• Connection type: Wifi

Any other details:

Current printer has lived decades but is slow, bad quality and now glitches after periods of inactivity and I'm tired of having to walk across the house to restart it before I can print anything. I see a fair amount of reviews of different brands with the same problem. The printer will live on the other end of the house from where we usually hang out so I want to minimize extra trips back and forth. First I was sold on a Brother but then rtings convinced me to go for an Epson Ecotank.

Wife and I currently have two homes in FL, one is our primary (5.35%) and another is a long term rental (2.25%). Our current tenant has 1.2 years left on their lease but we anticipate they will stay longer. If not, that mortgage is only ~$2k. Current rental income goes straight into an LLC business account and stays there unless needed for the rental. Wife and I net after both mortgages, monthly expenses, retirement ~$10k a month. Neither of us have any debt except our homes and would like to invest and grow as we’re both young. I have used the same broker for both homes and they recently shared that we can get in mid to high 5s with a buy down as we also both have exceptional credit.
We don’t want to spend more than $650k and from what I’ve seen that seems very possibly for a newer 3/2 build, probably townhome downtown. Further research from multiple sources seems we can expect an average ~54% occupant rate through the year, the closer we get to downtown the higher that will grow. Fortunately, my wife’s sibling also lives downtown and is willing to completely furnish and manage the property for a share of profit.
I think that despite current economic conditions and home values it would still be a great idea to invest in real estate. Especially considering the rate we can obtain. I’m also very inexperienced with real estate investing, especially short term so please ask away or share any doubts, opinions, or advice you might have.
Thanks!