Letter from landlord

I had a strange relationship with deconstruction as my dad was trained at a university level to do apologetics. He was an LDS chaplain in the Army, and every night for scripture study, we got discourses on the nuances of our faith and justifications for every question we ever had. I didn’t swear until I was 18 years old, or drink caffinated anything until about that time as well, because it was never a matter of justification. It was what my family, my tribe, my people did, to go to church on Sunday, and to be worthy. I was senior patrol leader and assistant to the bishop if that clarifies who I was. I didn’t have “God will reveal it in due time” parents. I had “Here’s the answer, here’s contemporary discussion about it. Here’s some reading material if you want to learn more” parents, except for they were wicked smart, and had biased conclusions.
I was called to serve in the Mexico City East mission. Shortly before opening my mission call, I broke up with my girlfriend at the time. i left BYU-I and went home to prepare. I received my endowments after lying to my stake president about my worthiness to enter the house of the lord. I came clean, and he threatened to not let me go out for a year because I was unclean. The prick made me talk to a therapist to be cleared for the mission field. The therapist had a brain and let me go out. When I was giving my mission farewell speech, I wrote it to include the teachings of many religions in it. I had drawn inspiration from the 13th article of faith “We believe all things, hope all things-“ and wrote a poem about how Adam and Eve related to the Resurection and Atonement of christ. My dad tells me the stake president was shifting in his seat like he wanted to pull me down from the pulpit. Prick.
The CCM was a pleasure to attend because of my district. The guys in my district there held a secret thanksgiving feast after hours when we were supposed to be in bed with food we had smuggled out of the cafeteria. We had look outs so we wouldn’t be caught by the patrolling teachers. My district was placed under surveillance because of politics against our spanish teacher who we could tell actually cared about us, and we were transferred into a classroom with one sided mirrors, and microphones hanging from the ceiling. An apostle came to speak to the entire CCM, and I thought we would get a chance to meet with him directly, or that he would be even remotely accessible in some way. He was kept away from us, separate and removed even though we had the same mission. I played a lot of volley ball, and got into shape enough that I touched the rim of a basketball hoop for the first time while I was there.
My first companion was a native speaker, and liked to spend the mornings in the cyber (Internet Cafe). He would make sure I was on LDS.org while he looked at softcore porn on instagram. We would spend hours there, and I was disappointed that this was the mission.
We went to a previous investigators house, and while there, we saw preparations for an animal sacrifice. These guys were putting alcohol, cocaine, and blowing smoke onto a white chicken, and placed in into a cardboard box with a bunch of black chickens. They showed us a room full of weapons, with blood and feathers strewn all over the floor. We noped the fuck out, and went home.
I requested an emergency transfer after spending most days in the cyber, watching my companion deface JW’s property, and being an all around dick to me by telling me how to shower and how to sleep.
For his replacement, the person that would help me with his bastion of knowledge, they gave me a white guy who spoke as much Spanish as I did because he was only a transfer further into his mission than me. They made this poor kid senior companion to me before his first transfer was over. Why? Because the kid was a workaholic.
The first thing this elder and I did when we got to our apartment was to pick up and leave to go to the house of a member who had just died. We sang at the wake. I sang in a language I didn’t know, for people I didn’t know, with a companion I didn’t know. We sounded pretty damn good. The elder began setting appointments with the non-believing family members during the service. I just sat and watched the mindless kids chase the family dog.
This elder skipped lunch every day, and made me do the same. We knocked every door in our area twice that transfer. One time, he got very sick, and was delirious out in the sun with me while we were walking. I made us go home for lunch that day, and he made me promise to wake him up after thirty minutes so we could get back to the Lord’s work. Three hours later he woke up, chewed me out for letting him sleep that long, and then begrudgingly thanked me for making him rest.
One time, while walking, this Elder expressed to me that he also had some questions, but he was afraid to share the details because he knew my own testimony was fragile. I pressed him for details of his plight, and he revealed to me the darkest part of church history that he had learned while we were in the CCM, that Joseph Smith had drank alcohol while in Carthage Jail before he died. Thoughts of Fanny Alger, of Mountain Meadows Massacre, and of my own mother’s rather recently implemented looser interpretation of the word of wisdom all flashed through my head. This guy was supposed to be my teacher? All I could do was express how sorry I was for his confusion, and told him to have faith. Heaven knew I couldn’t help him.
One night with this companion, it was storming hard, and the streets were flooded. This guy refused to let us go home. We climbed along fences to avoid getting our already wet shoes soaked, and waded through a foot of water to get to the doors that were slammed in our faces. There was a loose wire on a door bell, and when I rang it, I was shocked by the completed circuit the water made. Rejection after rejection piled up. Finally, my “senior” companion said that this was the last row of houses. On the last house of the last row, there was a family that was all deaf. The father opened the door, and was suprised to see us and didn’t know who we were. I remembered the sign for Jesus from my grandparents who started and ran the ASL endowment ceremony in the Saint George temple. The family was thrilled we knew the sign. When I asked if we could come in, the family politely waved goodbye and closed the door on our faces.
Another time when it rained, something fell into my eye. It was one of those freak nature accidents, and small enough that I couldn’t figure out how to get it out without a mirror. The thing stayed wedged in the corner of my eye for hours before we got home and I could finally get the foreign object out. Looking at it on my finger, I could see it was a small green spider. Days later, still in pain, I pulled what I can only assume was accumulated webbing from the spider that I’d crushed against my eyeball off of my lower eye lid. The pain stopped after that.
I bought a $500 camera. It was stolen within a month.
This Elder and I had the good luck before transfers to baptize two children. They would have been baptized anyways, so I didn’t do any actual converting, but I taught a few lessons, got in the water and did the dunk. Bucket list item, check.
I didn’t have enough time for laundry on P-Day, so I’d wash my outfit and dry in on the radiator through the night. Transfers happen, and my new companion lied to our land lords about the electricity bill, paying it in full but not giving a reason as to why it was so high. I didn’t care anymore, I just needed something clean to wear, but these land lord had treated me and my previous companion well, better than the previous landlord who had stolen our cleaning supplies. I felt these people deserved honesty. My senior companion capitulated eventually, and he and I butted heads regularly after that on the morality of things. I think in hindsight he was a smarter and better man than I was.
The new land lords, the “Lagunez Family”, were wonderful. They included us in their activities, and I felt like I had some people in my corner. When I eventually came home from my mission, a daughter of the family had written me a goodbye letter. She is currently serving a mission. They made some great music, and I have “Infiltradors” on CD, the official name of the band the father of the family was a part of (he was the drummer).
I knew the whole area by heart by that point, so I navigated us to our appointments. Half of the landmarks I watched for to know our location were interesting buildings with unique colors. The other half of my landmarks were dead dogs whose decaying corpses had become second nature to see. I began marking how much time had passed by how deeply a certain dog on a certain dirt path’s chest was caved in.
There was an apartment complex in my area that I had been told not to proselytize in because “It’s dangerous.” Turns out, those people didn’t have any money, so the church didn’t want them. That complex was past the dog and to the east about ten blocks.
My companion and I knocked on a door, and visited a man who was missing his legs. His daughter was there, putting dirty water on the aching wounds. He had a single room for a house, and wheezed when he spoke. He couldn’t afford medication. He still went out and worked all day for his daughter, and gave her whatever money he made, trusting her to keep him alive somehow. The church expected this man to pay tithing. The church expected me to tell this man to pay tithing.
I got the chance to hike up a mountain. At the top, I played chess with a chess set I’d procured from one of the best rapid chess players I’ve ever met. He had been the ward mission leader. He was a good man, a good father, and I wish him the best.
I found another man who was deaf and spoke sign language. I sat with him, and convinced him to come to church all by myself while my companion talked with some tienda tender. I was so excited because this was my own personal project and it was going well. The man came to church, and I sat with him through sacrament meeting. In Sunday school (I can’t believe I did this), I accidentally drooled on the guy. I was just talking so he could read my lips, and I guess I forgot to swallow at some point because a dolup of spit landed on his arm. I apologized profusely, and he played it off, but I never saw that investigator again.
My companion and I knocked a door one day, and a man answered. He wore tattered clothes, and maggots were burrowing into and out of his feet. He muttered something about the stars, missing his wife, and he began to tear up. My eyes stung from the stench. The door closed. Somehow, I knew the man would be dead in a matter of weeks.
I had lost hope that I was doing anything worth while. I looked down on the Doc Martins that had stayed with me five months at this point. I was angry with myself for being so useless in the field, angry with the church for giving me leaders that didn’t listen to my needs or perspective, angry with my mom for drinking while I had to teach people that it was a sin, angry with my dad for giving me the skills and knowledge to justify anything, even pedophilia in the early days of the church, to the point where I could look someone in the eye, and knowing the kind of man Smith was, tell them he was a good man and a true prophet of God. Suddenly a man approached us. He said he recognized us as missionaries, and asked about our message. This never happened. People didn’t just come up to us unless they were crazy or dangerous. But this was a public place, and this guy was genuine. My companion talked to him, and gathered his story, but I was plotting something else. I was done with not caring about these people in a way that mattered. I was tired of walking in another man’s shoes, a man who wasn’t me, who believed different things than me. The chopped leg, the rotting dogs, the infested feet, it all swirled into a single thought in that moment.
What would Jesus do?
I walked over to the man, and in broken Spanish asked him to stand next to me. He did so, and I compared my shoe size to his foot. It was a perfect match. He protested, but I didn’t let him get a word in edge wise. I took off my shoes, put them on his dirty feet, and laced them up nice and tight. Those shoes had cost a ton, and had been meant to last the whole mission. All I had left at this point were my fancy dress shoes that gave my blisters back at the apartment. I didn’t care. I walked home in my socks that day, happy as a lark.
Covid-19 hit a month later. I was one of the few they brought home instead of quarantining. After having served only 6 months. I told God if he wanted me to stay home, he’d have to make them release me.
They released me. I think I was one of maybe a hundred missionaries that were released due to Covid. The church realized their mistake pretty soon after I was released. Once Covid infrastructure began to develop, they didn’t release any more. I guess I didn’t serve a full two years, but I did serve a full mission.
My brother served, and he nearly killed himself due to intense depression brought on by Covid quarantine and poor leadership (I’ve got a few mission president stories, but those are for another time).
I learned lying to someone’s face from my mission, and spent the rest of my time at BYU-I as “nuanced” until the last two years, over which the most epic hoe phase imaginable became my new mission. I spent those years terrified of getting a call from the honor code office.
I’m married now, with my degree irrevocably in my possession. I have friends and loved ones that are in the church and are working on their mission papers. I’m beginning to feel powerless again. I’m seeing the decay again, not on legs, feet, or dogs anymore, but in the souls of the people who the church raises to do their dirty volunteer work. I see them like the animal sacrifices I saw being prepared. I’m not sure what shoes I have left to give to those people that I know are going to be in pain.
My parents are out completely now. It was a long time coming, but they are out and so much happier. I’m working on building a new relationship with my family, one based off of the fact that we won’t be together forever, so we have to make the most of our time together now.
Happy Sunday guys, best of luck to you all. And most importantly, chupa la piña.

Hello: I am debating whether to take landlords to civil or criminal court. I don't know how to pursue a CRIMINAL case, and police tell me it's a "CIVIL courts matter".
I just did a civil court attempt, and the summons was sent by the summons dept at the civil courthouse by certified mail, but they did not respond, so the judge dismissed it and told me to get a lawyer and serve them by a sheriff or process server.
The court date was Aprl 8th, and on April 30th, the case info page stated the summons was sent back "return to sender".
Do you think that they saw it was from the court, did not open it, and that was somehow legal? The address was correct, and if the court said they were sending it certified mail, what I thought had to be a letter delivered i-person and signed for, was that legal?
If I pursue it as a CRIMINAL, regular court matter, do I need an attorney, and could the court appoint me one?
I was locked out of my apt, lost $ 1,000s, and landlord tried to attack me after I confronted them personally for the theft. They had also said for a month they'd let me back to retrieve my possessions, after first telling me they'd help me move, and stalled that for a month, then claimed that after 30 days of my things being at the apt, they magically became their property. AGAIN, I was LOCKED OUT, and spent a month expecting them to allow me to move my things. It was clearly a lied-about scheme.
I lost not just monetarily-costly things, but all my medicines, medical equipment, personal documents, family photos and heirlooms, work-related material when I did work, diplomas, , even my dead dog's ashes in an urn, etc.
They knew this, me BEGGING and PLEADING to be allowed in, and when I confronted them, they laughed and made a joke of it. I had lived there for almost a decade, not late on rent ever, and was being evicted "for mice" when they were there day-one, and being "messy".
Turned out, they were selling the bldg, and wanted me and my stuff out asap. They showed up the day before I was told i'd be evicted by email, demanding to take most of my possessions, and brought their truck w/ a trailer attatched.
They are extended family, and I was dealing with my nephew, we having what was a great relationship, so I trusted him when he asked if he could "use my keys" when I was on the way out of my apt to meet the landlord at the new apt. He told me we'd meet tomorrow to start moig my things, but that became a week, then month. It;s clear they ghosted me and then belieived 30 days meant I had sort of abandoed my stuff, when they locked me out and told me falsely that was the law.
What could I do? They refused to talk to me, and still do. The apt was cleaned out, so my things are gone, sold, in the trash, or furninshing their home.
My bro and I moved in 2014, and they ironically evicted him for stealing and doing drugs in 2016, and I was there until Nov of 2023.
I was only dealing with him, when his parents- the landlords- came to the apt three days after the stated eviction, and threatened me with retaliation and began banging and kicking on the door. I made a police report and sought help through the disability-related govt services.
IF I do a CIVIL case, and I win, as I'm pretty sure I would, I've read that it's my responsibility to follow up and make sure they pay the judgement. Is that true? I can easily see them not paying. I cannot afford an attorney, am disabled and on SS.
The REASON they were so ugly, doing what a regular, business-minded, non-family-related landlord would sink down to, was it was not just harmful but PERSONAL.
I have depression as well, and losing everything, including my relationship with my nephew, nearly put me over the edge. It took me nearly a month to even FIND an apt. I've sought therapy on-line to deal with it. I was in contact with a homeless shelter too, thinking i'd be homeless when no typical landlord would give a poor, broke, just-evicted, disabled person the time-of-day.
Any advice would be appreciated.

Hi all.
So unfortunately we ended up in a bad situation whereas my mum received a section 21 letter because the landlord wants to sell the house.
Due to her disabilities we went down the council route, mum was band A, she was preliminary offered a property. However the council messed up big time and pulled it out from under her feet.
A council lhoysing eader overturned all decisions medical evidence of my mum’s disabilities including hospital reports and took away all bandings. Were the process of appealing this but we’ve decided to go elsewhere. The appeal is more about disability rights.
Having witnessed things about the local council I believe they have seriously breached a duty of care.
Anyway We have had to secure alternative accommodation in an housing association. The place mum will be moving to is an over 55s facility. Its nice.
Whilst it does allow small pets, cats have to remain indoors and are not allowed in communal areas. My mum will also be on the second floor.
My mums cat is everything to her, and she cannot give him up. He has really helped get some of her life back after my dad died.
Unfortunately there is no one to take him in. I can’t because I live in a shared place. I’m not taking him to a rescue because they would just turn him a way. (I know the bleak outlook for him in my area).
He is mostly an indoor cat anyway, and is extremely clean. (Better than most humans.) He won’t go out at night and he only wants to be asleep on my mum. He cries to go to bed and will keep at it until my mum gives in. He goes out for about 5 minutes a day realises he hates it and comes back in again.
The accommodation is temporary because it’s not the best but we are working with other housing providers. Stuff is in the pipeline but it will take a few months. This option was a last resort on the back of the council screwing us over.
I’m just wondering if there are anyways to make the transition smoother. There is a communal garden I don’t know what their rules are, put if mum could put him on a cat leash or something and just sit with him. Or if we could do anything to the apartment.
It’s a completely open space aside from a few cupboards which benefits from the sun. We’re thinking of getting him one of those cat play areas from pets at home too.

[US-GA] Duplex neighbor causing a bunch of problems and just recieved a mildly threatening letter from them.
So, let's start with the basics. I've been living in this place for almost 3 years now. Prior to living here I rented from the same landlord in a nearby duplex in 2014. My neighbor is a man and his wife. They've been living there together for about 6 years with the man living there for nearly 15. We've remained cordial to this point regardless of the issues that have popped up. At least, that was the case up until recently. We share a front porch that has railing around the ledge and splitting the unit down the middle at the living room.
So, the issues(these aren't listed in any particular order).
First, Over the last 2 or so years they've taken in roughly 7 stray cats. They keep the majority of these cats outside at all times. This wasnt an issue initially as I didn't mind the little fluffballs on the porch but as times gone on it has become an inconvenience. The cats will shit on my porch and walkway leading from the porch to the gravel driveway where I park. I have stepped in cat shit no less than 4 times in the past 2 months. When I moved in I had a welcome mat at the door. Well , after the cats shit on it 4 times in one week and I couldn't get the shit off it the last time so I threw it out. I bought a hose and spray nozzle just to spray cat shit off my porch and shoes. I have tried non-toxic sprays to try and coax them away from my walkway and that hasn't worked. I have spoken directly with both the man and his wife on this topic and all I receive is gaslighting. They claim it's not cat shit, it's actually chicken, raccoon, and opossum shit. Also, these cats are not healthy. They do not look healthy, the majority of cat shit I step in is diarrhea, and their fur is in such poor shape.
Second, roaches. When I first moved in there were roaches. I contacted the landlord and he had pest control out. I also placed multiple different traps at the same time and they died down a bit. The kicker here is I asked the neighbor about the roaches and his response was, and I shit you not, "oh the woman in the other duplex(between 500-1000 feet away from current duplex) was dirty and when she moved out the roaches moved over here." that was roughly 1.5 years ago and the roaches come and go now. I place new traps every few months to try and cull the population as much as possible. I just believe that the neighbors are dirty as all hell as their porch is a mess and I wouldn't doubt the inside is just as bad or worse. Oh, and to top that off, they leave their cat food open on the porch. So, roaches, raccoons(which I've seen eating from the cat plate at night), and opossums all get their fill.
Third, and trigger warning in advance, domestic violence. I'll admit going into that I am ashamed of what I'm going to state here. The man beats his wife. I have heard them fighting on so many occasions. There was one day where I had gotten off work and started to chill and unwind preparing to go to sleep on the recliner in the living room. I heard them start fighting as they normally do. Well, this particular time they brought it out onto the porch. All I heard out my window was things breaking and multiple banging noises. Then just absolute screaming. She was screaming as if she were being murdered. Then there was silence and I heard him say " if you ever talk back to me like that again I will kill you." this is where I am ashamed. I should've called the cops. I didn't. The dude owns a gun, is an alcoholic, and is definitely unhinged enough to retaliate if I were to try and help. I am afraid that there would be retaliatory violence and it is an uncomfortable feeling that I should not feel in my own home.
Fourth, my girlfriend refuses to come over to my house anymore due to the sad looking cats/cat shit, the occasional roach that she sees, and her not wanting to be at my home alone at night(I work nights) knowing how unhinged the neighbor is. She has heard him beating his wife. She is afraid because "what am I supposed to do if he gets really drunk while you're at work and tries to come into the house."
There are a couple smaller things but this is the gist of the major issues.
So, about a year ago I messaged the LL about the cats shitting everywhere. About a week or so later there was cat litter alongside my backyard fence. I wasn't seeing cat shit everywhere anymore so I let it go.
We arrive now at last week. Got home from a long night of work, kicked my shoes off, and relaxed. Woke up for work later and started to throw my shoes on just to notice that there was cat shit on them that I had already tracked through to living room.
I was pissed and messaged the landlord "Neighbors let their cats back out again and they are shitting everywhere. Theyve already ruined the mat that was in front of the door when I moved in. There are shit stains all over the porch. I don't want to call animal control cause I doubt they'll do anything but I'm getting tired of having to either clean my shoes or dodge shit everytime I get home from work."
He didn't reply, which I expected as he rarely replies.
A couple days later I get home from work to see a note left in my door. The neighbors wife was pissed. I don't have the note on me right now so I'm going to summarize.
She claimed that the cats do not shit on my side of the house. They shit near their cars "because that's where they are used to shitting" she said that all the shit I'm claiming to be cat shit is chicken, opossum, and raccoon shit. She threatened me with this line "you told the landlord the lie about the cats trying to get us evicted so why shouldn't we tell the landlord that the house smells like weed." yes, my roommate and I smoke. Yes, it's an illegal state. She then goes on to claim "the smoke comes through our oven vent and dryer vent and my clothes reek of weed." I call bullshit because not even my clothes smell like weed. This is legitimately the only complaint I've ever heard them say about my living there. Throughout the letter she claims multiple times that I'm not seeing what I think I'm seeing and I'm just trying to get them evicted.
So, this is where I stand, all I can think of is get photographic evidence of the cats shitting, but I don't really know what it's going to accomplish. The cats definitely need to be taken care of better and them shitting everywhere is not cool either. The other issues I've noted should probably be dealt with as well but domestic violence is a tricky thing to involve myself in. My Gf is mad because I haven't called the cops but I legit don't want to be shot or be evicted/arrested because I smoke weed in my home.
Afterthought: there has been a few instances of the woman being on something, not sure what, and just being a zombie on the porch. I'm playing games and see a figure on the porch. I look out there and there she stands, facing the road, arms and head down, just trying to keep her balance. That was uncomfortable to see to say the least.

Duplex neighbor causing a bunch of problems and just recieved a mildly threatening letter from them.
So, let's start with the basics. I've been living in this place for almost 3 years now. Prior to living here I rented from the same landlord in a nearby duplex in 2014. My neighbor is a man and his wife. They've been living there together for about 6 years with the man living there for nearly 15. We've remained cordial to this point regardless of the issues that have popped up. At least, that was the case up until recently. We share a front porch that has railing around the ledge and splitting the unit down the middle at the living room.
So, the issues(these aren't listed in any particular order).
First, Over the last 2 or so years they've taken in roughly 7 stray cats. They keep the majority of these cats outside at all times. This wasnt an issue initially as I didn't mind the little fluffballs on the porch but as times gone on it has become an inconvenience. The cats will shit on my porch and walkway leading from the porch to the gravel driveway where I park. I have stepped in cat shit no less than 4 times in the past 2 months. When I moved in I had a welcome mat at the door. Well , after the cats shit on it 4 times in one week and I couldn't get the shit off it the last time so I threw it out. I bought a hose and spray nozzle just to spray cat shit off my porch and shoes. I have tried non-toxic sprays to try and coax them away from my walkway and that hasn't worked. I have spoken directly with both the man and his wife on this topic and all I receive is gaslighting. They claim it's not cat shit, it's actually chicken, raccoon, and opossum shit. Also, these cats are not healthy. They do not look healthy, the majority of cat shit I step in is diarrhea, and their fur is in such poor shape.
Second, roaches. When I first moved in there were roaches. I contacted the landlord and he had pest control out. I also placed multiple different traps at the same time and they died down a bit. The kicker here is I asked the neighbor about the roaches and his response was, and I shit you not, "oh the woman in the other duplex(between 500-1000 feet away from current duplex) was dirty and when she moved out the roaches moved over here." that was roughly 1.5 years ago and the roaches come and go now. I place new traps every few months to try and cull the population as much as possible. I just believe that the neighbors are dirty as all hell as their porch is a mess and I wouldn't doubt the inside is just as bad or worse. Oh, and to top that off, they leave their cat food open on the porch. So, roaches, raccoons(which I've seen eating from the cat plate at night), and opossums all get their fill.
Third, and trigger warning in advance, domestic violence. I'll admit going into that I am ashamed of what I'm going to state here. The man beats his wife. I have heard them fighting on so many occasions. There was one day where I had gotten off work and started to chill and unwind preparing to go to sleep on the recliner in the living room. I heard them start fighting as they normally do. Well, this particular time they brought it out onto the porch. All I heard out my window was things breaking and multiple banging noises. Then just absolute screaming. She was screaming as if she were being murdered. Then there was silence and I heard him say " if you ever talk back to me like that again I will kill you." this is where I am ashamed. I should've called the cops. I didn't. The dude owns a gun, is an alcoholic, and is definitely unhinged enough to retaliate if I were to try and help. I am afraid that there would be retaliatory violence and it is an uncomfortable feeling that I should not feel in my own home.
Fourth, my girlfriend refuses to come over to my house anymore due to the sad looking cats/cat shit, the occasional roach that she sees, and her not wanting to be at my home alone at night(I work nights) knowing how unhinged the neighbor is. She has heard him beating his wife. She is afraid because "what am I supposed to do if he gets really drunk while you're at work and tries to come into the house."
There are a couple smaller things but this is the gist of the major issues.
So, about a year ago I messaged the LL about the cats shitting everywhere. About a week or so later there was cat litter alongside my backyard fence. I wasn't seeing cat shit everywhere anymore so I let it go.
We arrive now at last week. Got home from a long night of work, kicked my shoes off, and relaxed. Woke up for work later and started to throw my shoes on just to notice that there was cat shit on them that I had already tracked through to living room.
I was pissed and messaged the landlord "Neighbors let their cats back out again and they are shitting everywhere. Theyve already ruined the mat that was in front of the door when I moved in. There are shit stains all over the porch. I don't want to call animal control cause I doubt they'll do anything but I'm getting tired of having to either clean my shoes or dodge shit everytime I get home from work."
He didn't reply, which I expected as he rarely replies.
A couple days later I get home from work to see a note left in my door. The neighbors wife was pissed. I don't have the note on me right now so I'm going to summarize.
She claimed that the cats do not shit on my side of the house. They shit near their cars "because that's where they are used to shitting" she said that all the shit I'm claiming to be cat shit is chicken, opossum, and raccoon shit. She threatened me with this line "you told the landlord the lie about the cats trying to get us evicted so why shouldn't we tell the landlord that the house smells like weed." yes, my roommate and I smoke. Yes, it's an illegal state. She then goes on to claim "the smoke comes through our oven vent and dryer vent and my clothes reek of weed." I call bullshit because not even my clothes smell like weed. This is legitimately the only complaint I've ever heard them say about my living there. Throughout the letter she claims multiple times that I'm not seeing what I think I'm seeing and I'm just trying to get them evicted.
So, this is where I stand, all I can think of is get photographic evidence of the cats shitting, but I don't really know what it's going to accomplish. The cats definitely need to be taken care of better and them shitting everywhere is not cool either. The other issues I've noted should probably be dealt with as well but domestic violence is a tricky thing to involve myself in. My Gf is mad because I haven't called the cops but I legit don't want to be shot or be evicted/arrested because I smoke weed in my home.
Afterthought: there has been a few instances of the woman being on something, not sure what, and just being a zombie on the porch. I'm playing games and see a figure on the porch. I look out there and there she stands, facing the road, arms and head down, just trying to keep her balance. That was uncomfortable to see to say the least.

So, let's start with the basics. I've been living in this place for almost 3 years now. Prior to living here I rented from the same landlord in a nearby duplex in 2014. My neighbor is a man and his wife. They've been living there together for about 6 years with the man living there for nearly 15. We've remained cordial to this point regardless of the issues that have popped up. At least, that was the case up until recently. We share a front porch that has railing around the ledge and splitting the unit down the middle at the living room.
So, the issues(these aren't listed in any particular order).
First, Over the last 2 or so years they've taken in roughly 7 stray cats. They keep the majority of these cats outside at all times. This wasnt an issue initially as I didn't mind the little fluffballs on the porch but as times gone on it has become an inconvenience. The cats will shit on my porch and walkway leading from the porch to the gravel driveway where I park. I have stepped in cat shit no less than 4 times in the past 2 months. When I moved in I had a welcome mat at the door. Well , after the cats shit on it 4 times in one week and I couldn't get the shit off it the last time so I threw it out. I bought a hose and spray nozzle just to spray cat shit off my porch and shoes. I have tried non-toxic sprays to try and coax them away from my walkway and that hasn't worked. I have spoken directly with both the man and his wife on this topic and all I receive is gaslighting. They claim it's not cat shit, it's actually chicken, raccoon, and opossum shit. Also, these cats are not healthy. They do not look healthy, the majority of cat shit I step in is diarrhea, and their fur is in such poor shape.
Second, roaches. When I first moved in there were roaches. I contacted the landlord and he had pest control out. I also placed multiple different traps at the same time and they died down a bit. The kicker here is I asked the neighbor about the roaches and his response was, and I shit you not, "oh the woman in the other duplex(between 500-1000 feet away from current duplex) was dirty and when she moved out the roaches moved over here." that was roughly 1.5 years ago and the roaches come and go now. I place new traps every few months to try and cull the population as much as possible. I just believe that the neighbors are dirty as all hell as their porch is a mess and I wouldn't doubt the inside is just as bad or worse. Oh, and to top that off, they leave their cat food open on the porch. So, roaches, raccoons(which I've seen eating from the cat plate at night), and opossums all get their fill.
Third, and trigger warning in advance, domestic violence. I'll admit going into that I am ashamed of what I'm going to state here. The man beats his wife. I have heard them fighting on so many occasions. There was one day where I had gotten off work and started to chill and unwind preparing to go to sleep on the recliner in the living room. I heard them start fighting as they normally do. Well, this particular time they brought it out onto the porch. All I heard out my window was things breaking and multiple banging noises. Then just absolute screaming. She was screaming as if she were being murdered. Then there was silence and I heard him say " if you ever talk back to me like that again I will kill you." this is where I am ashamed. I should've called the cops. I didn't. The dude owns a gun, is an alcoholic, and is definitely unhinged enough to retaliate if I were to try and help. I am afraid that there would be retaliatory violence and it is an uncomfortable feeling that I should not feel in my own home.
Fourth, my girlfriend refuses to come over to my house anymore due to the sad looking cats/cat shit, the occasional roach that she sees, and her not wanting to be at my home alone at night(I work nights) knowing how unhinged the neighbor is. She has heard him beating his wife. She is afraid because "what am I supposed to do if he gets really drunk while you're at work and tries to come into the house."
There are a couple smaller things but this is the gist of the major issues.
So, about a year ago I messaged the LL about the cats shitting everywhere. About a week or so later there was cat litter alongside my backyard fence. I wasn't seeing cat shit everywhere anymore so I let it go.
We arrive now at last week. Got home from a long night of work, kicked my shoes off, and relaxed. Woke up for work later and started to throw my shoes on just to notice that there was cat shit on them that I had already tracked through to living room.
I was pissed and messaged the landlord "Neighbors let their cats back out again and they are shitting everywhere. Theyve already ruined the mat that was in front of the door when I moved in. There are shit stains all over the porch. I don't want to call animal control cause I doubt they'll do anything but I'm getting tired of having to either clean my shoes or dodge shit everytime I get home from work."
He didn't reply, which I expected as he rarely replies.
A couple days later I get home from work to see a note left in my door. The neighbors wife was pissed. I don't have the note on me right now so I'm going to summarize.
She claimed that the cats do not shit on my side of the house. They shit near their cars "because that's where they are used to shitting" she said that all the shit I'm claiming to be cat shit is chicken, opossum, and raccoon shit. She threatened me with this line "you told the landlord the lie about the cats trying to get us evicted so why shouldn't we tell the landlord that the house smells like weed." yes, my roommate and I smoke. Yes, it's an illegal state. She then goes on to claim "the smoke comes through our oven vent and dryer vent and my clothes reek of weed." I call bullshit because not even my clothes smell like weed. This is legitimately the only complaint I've ever heard them say about my living there. Throughout the letter she claims multiple times that I'm not seeing what I think I'm seeing and I'm just trying to get them evicted.
So, this is where I stand, all I can think of is get photographic evidence of the cats shitting, but I don't really know what it's going to accomplish. The cats definitely need to be taken care of better and them shitting everywhere is not cool either. The other issues I've noted should probably be dealt with as well but domestic violence is a tricky thing to involve myself in. My Gf is mad because I haven't called the cops but I legit don't want to be shot or be evicted/arrested because I smoke weed in my home.
Afterthought: there has been a few instances of the woman being on something, not sure what, and just being a zombie on the porch. I'm playing games and see a figure on the porch. I look out there and there she stands, facing the road, arms and head down, just trying to keep her balance. That was uncomfortable to see to say the least.

Edited to say: we are moving out and have found a new place, but I continue to be on the receiving end of his hostile emails. I’m not asking for advice on whether I should stay or go, but as to whether I should take on the burden of teaching him the basics of landlord tenant law through scathing replies to his emails, or if I should just not engage, let it go, and ignore until we move.
This is not work related but has to do with my personal life. This is a burner account for obvious reasons with bad karma due to posting legal info in tenants rights subs which are trolled by landlords (my new hobby due to the situation explained below).
I am really struggling with having normal communications with my landlord due to my minimal, basic working knowledge of landlord tenant law in my jurisdiction and my landlords complete lack of understanding of these same rules. I do corporate transactional for work, so when I say basic knowledge I mean like basic knowledge I discovered via google.
Rental agreements are always annoying but generally I just agree to whatever inane stuff they include because my jurisdiction has clear rules on everything so it really doesn’t matter.
But i’m in a situation where my landlord has attempted to start the process to get me to move out of his property and it is OFF THE RAILS. I say “attempted” because he sent me some notice form that in no way, shape or form requires me to move out but he seems to think it’s an order or something. He keeps sending me progressively hostile emails about how I’m “violating” the “terms” and I’m not “complying” with the arbitrary date in the notice which he wants me to move out by which I’m realizing he thinks is like an eviction date.
I live in a jurisdiction with strong tenant rights laws and very clear processes for ending a tenancy but he seems to not have familiarized himself with them at all prior to becoming a landlord. Which is surprising to me because he’s like a senior VP of an international company. So I genuinely expected more from him.
I didn’t actually even realize he was so uninformed until yesterday when he sent me some deranged email asking me to sign some landlord’s application form that doesn’t have anything to do with the tenant. Like, it doesn’t even have a signature line on which I could sign even if I wanted to.
I guess the thing is…he is being really mean and aggressive in his emails. They are super hostile but also entirely out of touch with reality. It’s causing me a ton of stress and upset and I’m struggling to just “let it go”. It’s making me feel uncomfortable in my own home. And it’s entirely due to the fact that he is grossly uninformed. Like he seems to think I am really fucking him over by not moving out on the date he selected even though I have been bending over backwards to be a normal, reasonable person and try to find a new place since he wants his property back ALL WHILE I HAVE HAD ZERO OBLIGATION TO DO SO. like I have literally been working with him out of the good of my heart, yet he is so confused on the process that he thinks I am being a total asshole.
This is all to say, I don’t know how to be a normal person in this situation anymore. My work brain says to stop communicating with him but my personal brain needs to tell him he’s super dumb and the reason he’s unhappy is entirely due to his own lack of understanding. So I start drafting replies to him based on my personal urge to tell him this but then my work brain takes over and l’m basically writing a work letter explaining how he has the law wrong. I don’t want to be my own client.
What would you do? Would you write him a letter telling him he’s severely confused? Do I just ignore him and not engage because it’s so dumb? At this point there is not any kind of legal issue because he has botched the process so bad, it’s literally just an interpersonal issue where I’m being emailed by someone who is acting like a total asshole.
What would a normal person do here? Help me.

I have been in a apartment for two years, landlord didn’t renew my lease after 1 year. I moved out on 4-7-24 and inquired multiple times about my deposit. she texted me a letter on 5-18-24 of some garbage she claimed I left( they actually belong to her washer and dryer) and said the unit required plumbing repairs. A little over 400.00 in deductions from 2625.00. The letter she sent shows the deductions, but no interest generated For my time there. I also took a video of the unit before I left. Everything was clean and I wasn’t aware of any plumbing issues.
Can she do this? What are my next steps? Should I just take the deductions?

Hi I’m a 29 year old female. When I was 13, I fell pregnant. This wasn’t a consensual relationship, I was a virgin who didn’t really even know how babies were made, i still played with barbies, I was raped by my friends 23 year old brother during a sleepover.
I didn’t tell anybody. I didn’t know I was pregnant, Id only started my periods a few months prior so there absence didn’t concern me and like I said, I didn’t really know how babies were made beyond the basics. I found out I was pregnant at 29 weeks when I went to ER with my parents for stomach pain.
My parents were very angry at me despite the circumstances. He was convicted and imprisoned. They tried to find a doctor who’d give me an abortion but none would due to gestation. They said I had to give the baby up and I went along with it, I had no support from them and I grew up having a very cold relationship with them. When my daughter was born I was inconsolable and didn’t want to give her up. I refused to and my daughter was forcefully taken from me at the hospital. I was told that I was too young and because of that they didn’t need my consent for adoption just the consent of my parents. After which I was hysterical and had to be sedated. I made attempts on my life in the months after that. I was then put in to boarding school, where I stayed until I was 18.
It wasn’t an open adoption, I was allowed to leave a letter with her and I also left her my necklace which was my prized possession at the time. The adoptive mother stated she wanted no contact which I was devastated about but the social worker told me I could have contact when she turned 18. After I turned 18 and left boarding school, I moved in with my Nan whilst attending university. My Nan gave me so much love and care and was very disappointed in my parents (my Nan had no knowledge of me even being pregnant)
When I was 21 I graduated and I also got pregnant, that relationship didn’t work out but I’ve since married and had 3 more children. But I’ve never stopped thinking about my first born. I gave birth to her on my 14th birthday so we share a birthday and every birthday I feel like I’m grieving. I go through periods of just crying and staying in bed feeling guilty at what I’d done. I still feel so guilty and I can’t cope with guilt it eats me up.
Anyway, my daughter who is now 15 found me on Facebook 2 weeks ago (I have a distinct name and I still use my maiden name on there) she messaged me an angry message and then blocked me so I couldn’t even respond.
She messaged me saying that she hates me and I’m dead to her, she told me how much she loves her adoptive mother and as far as she’s concerned I don’t exist. She says I’ve turned her in to a “messed up person” She told me how she thought I was a disgusting person for giving her up for adoption because I wanted to “enjoy life without the burden of a child” her words. She called me a slut (among other words) and questioned why I was having sex at 13. She said that she hoped my other children die and called them racist terms (they are mixed) because she is angry that I kept them and not her and that she felt that meant I wasn’t good enough. She then went on to say her adoptive mother told her that
1: My parents (her bio grandparents) wanted her but I refused to look after her and wanted her to be adopted (lies)
2: I wanted an abortion and told adoptive mother that I wished I could have had an abortion (lies)
3: That adoptive mother had reached out to me when I was 21 and pregnant with her first sibling to ask if I wanted contact, and I (according to her birth mum) said I didn’t care about her and wanted to forget the whole thing and asked her not to contact me again. (God knows if that had actually happened I would have jumped at the chance)
4: That I was sleeping around with a lot of men my age and didn’t know her bio dad as I’d been with so many male school friends which is why I got sent to boarding school because I was “out of control” (lies)
All the above are just outright lies. I am glad she doesn’t know the circumstances of her conception, I’d be happy if bio mum had told her for example that her father was a childhood boyfriend of mine because the truth is something she shouldn’t know until she’s older, but to suggest I was sleeping around with multiple men at the age of 13 and didn’t know who he was is disgusting when it’s not true.
Im not able to contact her back because she’s blocked me. I’ve looked at her profile from my husbands account, I’ve seen her adoptive mum and dads Facebook profile but I don’t intend to contact any of them as much as I want to because I guess I will just tell her everything when she’s 18 if she wants to hear it because perhaps now is not the appropriate age.
Her mums Facebook shows that she is her only child, that she’s now divorced (her and her husband adopted my daughter so she’s since divorced him) they have lots of photos together. She has one post saying they were being evicted and asking if anyone knew any landlords so not in stable housing.
I found her adoptive fathers Facebook. No photos of my daughter but plenty of photos of his new wife and their 3 children. It seems he’s moved overseas.
My daughters Facebook is concerning and it’s public so I could see everything. She posts quotes about depression and anxiety, has scars on her wrists which I believe are SH scars) writes status’ such as “no body cares about me I may as well just die” and posts indicating how she hates her adoptive father (not sure what’s gone on there, likely adoptive mother has poisoned her against him too or won’t allow access but he possibly he just doesn’t want involvement) constantly posts pictures laying in a hospital bed and attached to a drip with wounds on her arms.
I know I shouldn’t have been snooping on adoptive parents and daughters Facebook as much as I did but I needed to ensure I had all info to give to social services and so I knew the situation. When I met them, they seemed kind. Social services are allowed to tell birth parents a bit about the adoptive parents life at the time of adoption, they told me they had been together for 10 years prior, she was unable to carry a pregnancy past 20 weeks and had lost a lot of babies before pursing adoption, that they had a lovely big home and that she didn’t work so had a lot of time for baby and her husband was in the army and how they had lots of extended family to love the child.
I have since informed social services about what I’ve seen on Facebook and they’ve just told me that they can not discuss this with me due to confidentiality as she’s legally not my child but have said they can assure me that they are looking in to it (I screenshot and sent the posts) and are doing everything necessary to ensure she is ok and now have involvement with her and bio mum. They can’t update me on their circumstances now (like they did when she was adopted) because the adoption is done.
I don’t really know what to do. She has a false impression of me told by her adoptive mother. None of which is true, she was so wanted and I’ve never got over it. I now fear that her thinking I rejected her and didn’t want her and she wasn’t good enough has led to some serious mental health issues and potentially these will only get worse or she could harm herself very badly based on lots of lies.
I want her to know I love her, I want her to know I wanted her but I was forced to give her up, I want her to know that I still love her and always will and that I’d do anything for her. I want to tell her I was never contacted by adoptive mother and had I have been I would have jumped at the opportunity to even just talk to my daughter. I want to tell her that I do know her bio father and I wasn’t sleeping with multiple men (although the truth regarding the rape shouldn’t be disclosed right now) I just want her to know all of this, but I’m powerless until she is 18. I have been told if I message her from a different account since I’m blocked I could face legal charges.
I am so scared of her hurting herself based on lies. Her adoptive mum whilst I believe does love her, has poisoned my daughter against me in an attempt to get my daughter to hate me because she doesn’t want daughter potentially coming back to me or forming a relationship with me and her getting pushed out, so she’s said all of this to make that impossible so she will be her only mother.
But that’s to the detriment of my daughter, my daughter clearly has mental health issues and whilst they could be from other things I know that feeling unloved, unwanted and having being told this information that is outright lies must be weighing heavily on her and making her feel inadequate. I can’t imagine if I was adopted and I heard things like that about my bio mum, it would devastate me and I would hate myself.
I don’t know what I’m hoping to gain from this post just looking for advice. I can contact her in 3 years. But I’m scared in those 3 years something bad could happen with the way her mental health is, and that something bad may happen without her knowing the truth about how much I love her.
I’ve been off sick from work since, I have been an emotional wreck. I just hope she’s okay even if she does hate me. Of course I’d love to tell her the truth but more than anything I want her to know the truth for the sake of her own mental well-being even if that means she still doesn’t want to speak to me. Social services just keep telling me that they can’t discuss anything with her about me beyond the basics of the fact that she’s adopted. The rest is down to adoptive mother to disclose if she wishes. When she is 18 she will get access to her file and know the true circumstances but until then, everything she knows is based on lies.
I fully understand her angry reaction because I can understand being told that about your bio mother would upset and anger anyone. I’m more concerned about the fact her adoptive mum thinks this is ok just to keep daughter close to her and away from me but to the detriment of her mental health and feelings. She could have just for example said “your mum was young so couldn’t care for you but I’m sure she loves you” that’s what I’d say if I was an adoptive mother - even if that wasn’t the truth!

We are sub leasing from a lady who has left the country and is not coming back. The landlord found out we are staying there and she had not gotten permission for the sublet prior to us moving in. She sent the lady a letter saying she has to tell us to move out by the end of the month or they will terminate her lease. I've seen the original rental contract and I know she is not charging us extra for the sublease. She's happy to transfer the lease to us if the landlord will allow but I don't know if they will want to do that.
We have a sub lease contract that has a 3 month notice period but I don't think this is valid with the main landlord and I don't have the energy to take do some sort of legal battle over the sub lease contract.
What are our options here if they don't want to transfer the lease to us?
Can they legally kick us it out in two weeks?
Can we just tell the main landlord we have moved out and keep staying until we find a new place for a few months? Not technically legal but it would buy us some time to find new housing at least. It's not like they can come round to the house and see who is living there.

Apparently my landlord’s son live at home and my landlord want to move his son into our home as his first. We’ve live here since 2006 and we now know everyone nearby we’d barely make it out if we move since everyone is so close to work and the rent is barely affordable in other places. Our landlord came just this Thursday to deliver it to us. We’ve never had any issues before. I do know last year we had gotten a letter from our project saying that they were gonna be renovating all our backyards this summer. And just before it hits we get told we have to move idk if it’s related or not but yeah finding a place that affordable for 3 people Me and my grandparents will be hard since everything is so close and I’ve lived here since I was barely even 1 year old any advice to fight this would help my grandparents aren’t too keen on trying to fight it as they don’t wanna risk it actually being real but they also don’t wanna move any advice would be deeply appreciated.
Edit: I’d like to add that I’ve also been trying to convince them as a last resort to contact him directly and ask if there’s anyway we could stay here since we’ve been long term renters and that we’d be happy with a higher rent as we can’t afford a first and last months rent

Hi, first time poster.
Property is owned by the Church and overseen by trustees. The property is managed by a letting agency. We have been told all contact re: property goes through the agency. I work in homelessness service so am aware of Renting Homes Wales act and fairly clued up on housing laws and legislation but this is a query I'm unsure on. I am a 32f on maternity leave with a 4m old baby, luckily my husband works from home for the majority.
Yesterday morning, a representative from the landlord who sometimes does some maintenance work on the property attended without notice. He started dressing down my husband for contacting the agency about works and not him directly. We have an agreement that the agency manages the property so we know we are in the right for this. I reluctantly allowed him very quick entry to assess the ceiling for asbestos as we are really concerned about this. Also we are due to re sign for the property and though I understand there are protections for tenants, I don't want to give cause for them to think we are impeding necessary remedial works on the property. As he crossed the threshold he said he doesn't need permission to come in. I told him he does and that I want it done quickly so he can leave as I don't like his attitude and he is becoming aggressive. He responded with "I don't like your attitude." At this point both my husband and I asked him to leave as we no longer felt safe. He gripped the living room door frame and said "I'm not going anywhere". We pleaded with him to go and he kept refusing saying he didn't have to leave. At this point my infant child is in the living room in her rocker and I start to shake unsure what to do. We kept repeating please leave, I even told him I have a baby in the house and I'm shaking now so please leave and he replied pointing in my face "you should shake". My husband raised his voice and told him to get out now as he won't take threatening behaviour. He grumbled heading towards the door slowly and then gripped the outer doorframe which prevented me from shutting it and came up to my face saying "You should feel ashamed, you have to live with your conscience." I then shut the door behind him and locked it. I cried as I felt so powerless with the whole interaction. I immediately got on the phone to the agency and sent them an email. They escalated it to management and sent the trustees a letter detailing things like giving 24hr notice, that no one can force access and said they have asked that this gentleman does not attend the property on his own to avoid us feeling uncomfortable. I asked that this goes one step further as we didn't feel safe with that interaction and would like to request he doesn't come to the property at all. They said that they are unable to give us this assurance as they are unsure if he is a trustee or just maintenance. I'm not sure where we stand with this moving forward. We have slept on the idea of making a report to the police regarding this behaviour but I'm unsure if this is really the hill to die on. Where do we stand on refusing this particular gentleman access to the property on grounds of safety?

I live in Alberta, we signed a 2 year lease when we moved into our home 8 months ago. Yesterday my landlord told me he is experiencing financial issues and would like to sell our home.
We've been planning on buying the house but unfortunately due to some errors we've made with poor choices I have a recent (within the last year) vehicle repo. This makes it impossible for me to try and get a mortgage through a bank and the brokers I've talked to are giving me the same answers.
I've been thinking about trying rent to own. Does anyone know if this is a good idea?
For some information on our financial situation, we have $30,000 available for a down-payment, I make about $120,000/year. My credit is in the low 600s.
The rent to own place I contacted is Royal Rouge. Couldn't find too much info on the or reviews.
TLDR; Bad credit, landlord selling, Rent-to-Own seems like the only option, should I do it?
Edit: the $30,000 for a down-payment is from my grandparents. They would sign a gift letter. I would definitely not have a repossession had I had $30,000 available at the time I would have needed it.

I have a couple questions stemming from a small claims case I currently am apart of in Eastern Washington.
1) how much time are the courts required to give in regards to change of date?
2) why are they not required to provide proof that they sent you a copy in the same manner as I was about having served the opposing party a minimum of 10 days prior. How is a regular, non certified letter and a supposed phone message proof of service?
3) who would I file a complaint with against the judge and the court staff over their flippant behavior and general attitude unbecoming of the judicial system.
I had a court date for small claims against an ex landlord two weeks ago. On the day that we were supposed to appear we were no on the docket. I asked the court clerk about it and they said “the opposing party asked for a continuance. We granted it and mailed the notice on Monday. You can try and talk to the judge but he won’t talk to you”. Keep in mind it takes a minimum of 3 days for a letter to get across town, usually 4 to 5. I waited until the end of the proceedings before I asked if I could speak with the judge. From the get go he had a very flippant attitude and was generally disrespectful when I asked two questions. One about providing proof of notice to myself and one about scheduling. I went back to the clerk (in a different room) and both her and the judge were acting as if I was a major inconvenience for asking for a different court date since the one they set without consulting me was not going to work.

I (31F) have an ESA (50 lb mixed-breed dog) to help manage my generalized anxiety disorder. Before adopting my pup (~ 3 years ago), my therapist and I discussed adopting an ESA extensively, and my ESA has certainly vastly improved my day-to-day life. However, I don’t yet have an official ESA letter for her as the apartment I live in allows pets, and I didn’t need any other accommodations at the time. However, I have some big life transitions looming (moving out of state, new job, etc.), and I’m starting to experience some… anxiety about the challenges associated with an ESA while navigating these changes. I have a few questions about acquiring letters and rental/employment accommodations, and I’d appreciate advice from other ESA owners in how you’ve navigated these challenges. Links to online resources with definitive information are always greatly appreciated.
For acquiring a letter, I’ve heard mixed things about who is eligible to provide a letter – can my therapist (MS, MC, PPS, LMFT) write one for me or do I need to go through a primary care physician or other medical provider? Are there any resources for the information that should be included in the letter that I can share with my provider, to ensure approval?
For renting, I will of course seek pet-friendly rentals when possible, but they are few and far between these days, and it seems that discrimination against ESAs is rampant. For rental advertisements that state “no pets”, do you have to disclose an ESA to the landlord at any point, and if so, when? It seems like it would be easy for landlords to discriminate against ESAs listed on rental applications, but the discrimination would obviously be hard to prove. On the other hand, I don’t want to put myself in a position where my new landlord is retaliating against me because I didn’t disclose an ESA on the application. Any advice/legal documentation to keep in my back pocket while navigating these kinds of issues are appreciated!
For employment – what are the kinds of “reasonable accommodations” that some of you have gotten from your employers? For example, are “remote/hybrid work (when possible)” or “bringing the ESA to work” reasonable requests?
Thanks in advance for any advice/resources you can share!

I am not the OP. That is u/No_Chrysler-4-Me. Originally posted on EntitledPeople and pettyrevenge.
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There are two previous BORUs I posted last year:
First Post Jan 8, 2023
Second Post Jan 8, 2023
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Trigger Warning: Domestic Violence
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Editor's Note: THIS IS VERY LONG! OP posts a lot about his family. I will include links to other posts at the bottom of this BORU, but I will keep this post focused on the brother and OP.
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TL;DR of the above BORUs: OP's older brother is lazy and a cheapskate. OP bought a truck, an '03 Toyota Tundra. Brother gets jealous and buys a 01 Dodge Ram 1500, but it's crap. OP tries to help brother fix up the truck despite warning him not to buy it. Once it was running a little better, brother challenges OP to a race. Brother loses and becomes obsessed with practicing racing, ruining the truck further. Eventually they go camping, have more shenanigans, brother finally blows the transmission. Brother has to drive his ex-girlfriend's minivan, which he hates, tries to LS Swap the Ram, but no one will lend him the money. He eventually sells it. Brother doesn't stop there. He NEEDS a truck, so he has the brilliant idea of chopping the minivan up to make it into a truck. He needs money to Frankenstein the minivan, no one will pay, but eventually he cuts it up, uses recycled wood to make the truck bed, etc. He calls it the "Mini-Ram."
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My brother sold the Mini-Ram and got a Silverado. That was fine. It's what happened after that made things worse May 5, 2024
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I've been gone for some time. But I'm back with a bad one. I've spoken before about how my older brother competed with me needlessly. And he did a lot of beyond stupid shit. Well he finally pushed the whole family over the edge, and got disowned. And I'm going to be explaining a lot of what happened the past year, and then some from before that. But it's too long for one post.
Well going back more than a year. Some may remember my brother getting a free minivan from his ex after the Dodge Ram truck I warned him not to buy became a moneypit. I helped him work on that truck and even repaint it. And I helped him remodel his camper trailer too. Why? Because he's my brother. And I guess some part of me deep down kept hoping he'd one day change. But he tried to take credit for things I did. Especially with remodeling the camper. And he had tantrums when called out on his lies. He also became temporarily obsessed with my truck, and even implied he'd just take it from me because he hated driving a minivan. He referred to it as a chick car. He acted like a complete child because I refused to trade vehicles, and even got our parents involved. It was just a really stupid and needless situation that my brother tried to make a hill to die on.
It started when my brother bought his Dodge Ram simply because I bought a Toyota Tundra. He had a perfectly running Subaru Baja before that. Then he said he wanted a man's truck and bought the worst barely running pile he could find that was also overpriced considering the condition. He could have at least aimed for a diesel since he wanted a dodge so bad. Lots of dumb shit happened after that. Including my brother wanting to LS swap the Ram after destroying it's engine and two transmissions. But I'm pretty sure the person who offered to do the LS swap for him was a scammer. Not to mention LS swapping any vehicle basically means replacing the ECU. But it never happened anyway since the engine and transmission my brother wanted sold before he could get them. And he had no running vehicle anymore. So my brother's ex, whom he has a young child with, gave him her old 90s Ford Windstar van. It was admittedly an ugly, dent riddled POS with the rear window busted out. But it still ran and drove surprisingly well, considering that's not one of Ford's better vehicles. And then my brother decided to cut it up into some sort of van/truck. Or a ute as they're called in some places. But he made this thing ugly. Lots of spray foam, recycled wood, and rattle can paint. Even mismatched sub-lights above the cab. He frequently raided the junkyard for parts. And he even glued a Ram badge onto the grill of that van/truck. He called it the Mini-Ram. Lots of stupid cheap mods done to that vehicle too. Someone once asked me how ugly the Mini-Ram was on a scale of 1 to 1000. And I said about a 667.
My brother did a lot of other dumb things in this time. Like following me camping just to piss me off. He was a general leech who stole power from my generator, and tried to steal beer from my camper fridge repeatedly. He was so brazen as to just walk right in, and then tried to pretend to be so drunk he didn't realize what he was doing when caught. I've spoken many times about how he stole booze from me. Until my friends and I revenge pranked him and his near equally douchey friends with a growler full of laxative tainted beer. We admittedly used way too much laxative. But my brother never stole from me again because I threatened to tell everyone about his humiliation. He crapped on his own shoes squatting in the woods. And that's just a bit of it.
Eventually my brother seemed to learn his lesson. He sold the Mini-Ram to someone who actually paid him well for it. And no, I don't know what they did with it. And I don't care. But, when the 2K he sold the Mini-Ram for was combined with his savings, my brother had a bit over 4.5K to buy a better vehicle with. And he spotted a 99 RWD Silverado truck with an extended cab for sale online. He really shouldn't have sold his only method of transportation before having a replacement vehicle ready. But I couldn't fault him for taking the deal when presented, considering what he sold. And as much as my brother annoyed me, I still cared about him enough to help. He showed up begging me to drive him over 60 miles to look at this truck he found on Market Place.
So I reluctantly drove him out to see this truck. It wasn't that bad actually. Save for the rough mismatched paint, the rusty hood, the dents, the cracked windshield, and.... Actually, I guess it was kinda that bad. But not compared to the clapped out Ram my brother bought previously. The Silverado had a manual transmission, which we both confirmed shifted great as the records showed it had been rebuilt a few years before. The engine had been swapped at one time too. So it was kinda hard to gauge the odometer as it had not been rolled back for the new engine. It was at about 350.000 miles, but those numbers don't really mean jack when the engine and tranny have been replaced or rebuilt. Admittedly the engine ran like a top. The tires on the truck were in pretty damn good shape too. And on steel rims. Which I like. Very practical. I asked my brother if this was the manly kind of truck he'd been looking for. And for once he spoke logically and said that he'd rather have this than risk what happened with the Ram again. Fair enough. Besides, Chevy trucks are cool and reliable. I've always liked them. Like a rock as they say.
My brother and I scrutinized this truck in detail like a pair of pawn brokers, and talked the price down to 3K. They wanted 4K. But we could hear a sound while test driving it that was either bad ball joints or wheel bearings. We jacked up the wheels, and the bearings felt and sounded fine. But the ball joints were pretty bad. And that's not a cheap fix unless you can do it yourself. The truck was owned by the seller's father, who'd passed away a year prior. So the guy took 3K for it after we listed the problems. After driving it back, I insisted my brother get the truck to a mechanic ASAP. And he listened that time. The mechanic said the ball joints were about to come apart, and it's have caused a very bad situation if they had. And it cost him a grand to get them replaced. The truck also needed new plates ant the title registered. Which ate up a lot of the remaining budget. Then came the paint. My brother wanted the Silverado painted black right away. I told him to wait. But he didn't listen and DIY'd some body work, and then rattle-canned it with Rustolium turbo cans. The paint was full of orange peel, and overspray. He didn't even use primer. And the truck looked kinda mediocre. Then the southern weather had at it. Already numerous chips, scrapes and fades. Whatever. I stopped caring.
You'd think that'd be the end of this part. But no. There's more. What's behind door number 3? If you guessed a dumbass with a knife stuck in his ass. Then you'd win the gold! Yeah that's right. My brother got a knife in his ass.... How? How else... He and his friends all got high and decided they were gonna go outside and build a fort in the back yard of the house they rent out of scrap they found laying around. My brother while stoned wanted to show off how he can flip out a butterfly knife really fast, and decided he was gonna act like he was in an action movie, and did some sort of stupid thing where he was running and flipping out the knife really fast. The ground was wet, he slipped, and somehow got the knife in his right butt-cheek. They called me to come take him to the hospital because they were all too stoned to drive. I had to lay my brother down in the bed of my truck on a mattress because we were too scared to pull the knife out, and I drove him to the hospital like that. They rushed him in, and thankfully he only needed about 5 stiches on his butt and some antibiotics. Then I drove him back home the same way, and he insisted I take him to a drive through. He also tried to get me to pay, because...reasons! I told him to buy his own damn food.
After that there was more dumb BS that I won't bother getting into. But eventually my brother was seemingly getting bett...er...less bad. He was a bit sore his Silverado wasn't a 4X4, and my Tundra is. But being RWD kept him from trying to take it off-roading. He did try once, and had to pull the truck out of mud with a come-along. And he didn't try it again. He did want to drag race my truck again too. I said hell no. Not gonna risk either of our piles breaking down. And he was a complete douche about that too. I told him to stop acting like his dick was bigger than it is, and act his age. He didn't take that well. But he seemingly really was improving. Even being a much better dad to his daughter. Things got pretty good for him. Until I decided to buy a house. That's when the serious drama started.
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My entitled brother threw a massive fit, just because he was mad I bought a house May 6, 2024
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Yeah, I'm aware of several similar stories involving entitled family members wanting houses they have no claim to. But I guess this shit really happens. And it's no picnic when it does.
I suddenly became a homeowner some time ago because friend of mine's grandfather was moving to Florida. And his house was ripe for picking. I knew the old man well. RIP, he passed a few months later from a sudden stroke. Anyway, he offered the house and property to me for 200K. I practically ran to the bank to apply for the loan. The house is a manufactured home from the 80s. But it was remodeled repeatedly by the former owner, and has a separate garage building. The home and property could have gone for more. But he offered the house to me because he knew I'd take care of it. I had 30K saved that made a good down payment. And I was happy to leave my apartment. I'd wanted to eventually move out of there after what my cheating ex did anyway. But that's a story for another time.
As for my brother. Well he went bonkers when he found out I bought a house. He had this repeated history of copycatting me for the past decade. But this... There was no way in hell he could copycat buying a house with his terrible credit and inconsistent income. And he got in an argument with me over how I was just trying to make him look bad by doing something he couldn't. No, I just wanted a damn house. And the price was too good to refuse. Then he told me I should have turned it down because...(He had no good reason) I could practically see his screws getting looser with every dumbass excuse he made as to why I shouldn't have done it. But I pointed out all those excuses were just because I did something he currently can't. And when I bought the house, it had nothing to do with him. I just wanted to be a home owner for the security and extra space. I finally don't have to store my camper at my parents' house. And I have a garage that I can store stuff and tinker in.
I bought a camping cot, he bought a camping cot, went to the gym, he went to the gym, bought good booze, he bought good booze (Or stole it from me), I bought a new TV, be bought a new TV, I bought a truck, he bought a truck, I bought a camper, he bought a camper, I bought a used portable DVD player, he bought a used portable DVD player, I went camping in a specific place, he went camping in that specific place, I bought a house, he...(404 Error! Insert tea kettle noises and Benny Hill chase). He also acted like a complete child toward me when he built his Mini-Ram thing. He actually confronted me and said it was keweler than my boring Tundra, because it was something original. I swear, he did the dumbest mods to that vehicle. Like putting twist studs in the suspension coils to raise the ride height.
Well after weeks of openly fuming about me being a home owner, my brother suddenly acted like he had another brilliant idea. He wanted to move in with me. I laughed at him. Then he ended up demanding I rent one of my rooms to him. And for only $200 a month (Utilities included) because he shouldn't have to pay any more than that since we're family. He flipped his lid when I said fuck no! Then he got our parents involved again. Only this time they actually sided with him at first. Though it was mainly our mother. She and my brother showed up demanding I let my brother move in. And my brother had a shit eating grin on his face that I could tell he was thinking he was getting his way thanks to mommy dearest. I said "FUCK NO!" to both their faces, and my mother cried that I was using foul language to her and being an ass when I had the space now. I called my dad, and he told my mom that he'd warned her I wouldn't do it. And to leave me the hell alone. Mom whined my brother was living out of his camper next to a shabby house he was renting space from. I said that wasn't my problem to fix. And my brother has proven countless times that he cannot be trusted. My brother was fuming to the point of being red with veins popping out. My mom tried one more time to convince me with tears. And that just made me angrier.
I went on a rant that was something like this. Bro can't buy a house, so he wanted to invade mine. I refuse to ever live with my brother again. I would sooner live in the woods without electricity than with him. He's intentionally irritating as all hell. And if I had him as a roommate, I just knew he'd steal my booze, take my stuff, and invade my privacy none-stop. Not. Fucking. HAPPENING! No matter how many tears mom tries using on me. My mom broke down and finally conceded she'd never convince me after that rant. And she had to take my brother by the hand and leave with him because he initially refused to go, and kept begging her to turn back and make me let him move in. And then I yelled to him that it was a laugh that he called me a mama's boy before. Because he'd become exactly that. And this was just like the time he tried to get our mother to make me trade vehicles with him because he felt ashamed to be driving a minivan. He yanked away from mom, then told me to go fuck myself and the horse I rode in on. I laughed and pointed out I didn't ride in on anything, because I was already home. But his rattlecan horse was waiting for him in the driveway. He flipped his lid again, and looked like his head was going to explode. But mom got in front of him, and told him to just go. Then he drove off in his rattlecan Silverado without her. He'd driven her there. And then I had to take her home.
While taking her home, I made things very clear with my mother over why I could never trust my brother again. And his life was not my burden to bear. And then told her how little my brother was offering for rent anyway. Which he'd conveniently not told her. Then I later rented that same room to one of my best friends for $600 a month, and he pays for utilities. The other two rooms are my bedroom and a home office. There's an extra room in the separate garage too. So my mother tried to make me let my brother live in the garage instead. There's enough room in it's storage room for a bedroom. Again I said fuck no. And that's since been turned into another friend's rented room with a bit of a plywood remodel. Yeah, I kinda rented both the spare bedroom and garage room out to friends out of spite. But I wasn't letting my brother live with me in any capacity!
My brother later ended up having a complete meltdown in front of our parents over how he's the older brother. He should be the one who owns a house first. He's supposed to be successful, and I'm supposed to be the big loser in his shadow. Our dad poked him with his cane and told him that's not how life works, and they had a big argument. They told him to get out and not come back until he's cooled off and learned that he's just being a pointlessly jealous asshole.
The next part I post, my brother did the dumbest thing of all.
Edit: I came home late to over 600 comments, and still more pouring in. Far too many for me to answer. So I'll clear some things up here. Yes, I am no contact with my brother. And he's NC with the rest of the family as well. I do have cameras inside and outside my home. And a dash cam too. My brother knows this, and has stayed the fuck away since he left town. I'm told I'm an asshole too. Not arguing that, because it's true. I'm not exactly the nicest guy. But have someone like my brother in your life, and see how peachy you turn out.
Some have mentioned to having siblings just like my brother. Sadly I know very well people like him are increasingly common these days. My dad said a number of times that my brother probably would have ended up dead in an alley if he lived here 50 years ago with the way he behaves. As for our ages. I'm 30, and my brother is 32. I have not given my parents a spare key to my house. One is with a friend, and another is very cleverly hidden.
My house is a manufactured home. But it's not in a trailer park, and has been significantly modified with new siding and a new roof, and has a separate garage building. The previous owner was a former general contractor, and he loved to build and repair. And yes, I do have good insurance.
I keep seeing comments about a clock radio. Pardon me for not getting the reference. But I do own a digital alarm clock that has a built in CD player. Currently plays Tina Turner's Proud Mary to wake me up.
My brother and I were raised pretty evenly. He was always a jerk. But went full asshole after moving out. But our mother didn't favor him. She chewed him out plenty. And she didn't normally side with his stupidity. She just wanted him to live in a better place than in a camper next to a house filled with potheads. Addition: My brother willingly moved into that camper. He was renting half a room in that house of potheads. Then convinced the landlord to let him live in his camper on the property for the same price instead. And he bragged about his camper a lot. Which he has a full gaming center in, complete with PlayStation. He only wanted to invade my house to piss me off and make his cost of living even lower. He also doesn't like camping nearly as much as me. He mainly liked just pissing me off by following me. He loved to make me miserable. In fact, he felt entitled to make me miserable. That's the kind of person he is.
Do I have a restraining order against my brother? Not really. Just didn't bother. Because even if I did, it'd only be for like a year. And my brother wouldn't let something like that stop him if he was truly determined anyway.
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My entitled brother lost his mind and attacked me, his ex, and our father. That got him disowned by the family. But not before I beat the crap out of him May 8, 2024
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Warning: Contains domestic violence, small town drama, and idiocy. Read at own risk.
My brother's major downhill spiral started with jealousy over my house, but only got worse thanks to this next part. He started smoking pot more heavily and drinking harder. And that was making him more aggressive and violent. He got in a brawl outside of a bar for reasons I still don't know. But he got his ass handed to him on a platter. He eventually found out his ex has been seeing someone else. And ironically that someone is another friend of mine. Which was news to me. But it's not like he wasn't around my brother's ex a fair bit. They're both fairly social people, and were also friends for years. Once the secret was out, he confessed to me it wasn't planned. But my brother's ex Sara (Fake name) and my friend just clicked one day about a year ago. This sorta thing can only happen in a town like ours. I admit, Sara is very beautiful. But I've always seen her as a big sister figure ever since she started dating my brother in high school. So I never thought of getting with her myself. She kept her new boyfriend a secret for some time. I didn't even know until someone else spilled the beans. And the word traveled. When my brother found out, that was the last he could mentally take.
My brother was hoping for years that Sara would take him back. But no such luck there. When he lost his mind over the fact my friend was dating Sara, he started hunting for the poor guy. My friend is not a fighter, and a self described beanpole. So that's what I'll call him. Sara seems to like Beanpole because he's everything my brother is not. He isn't really a brave person. And came to me when he found out my brother was looking for him. He has a rather distinctively painted car. So it's easy to spot. My brother caught wind Beanpole was at my place, and came roaring his truck down the street.
When my brother showed up to my house, he started screaming and banging on my door because he wanted to kick Beanpole's ass. And when I refused to let him in, he attacked me. We had a redneck brawl right there in my front lawn. I want to say I won. But the fight only stopped when one of my friend/tenants yelled he was gonna call the cops. I sucker-punched my brother while he was distracted, and told him to never come back to my house again. And if he ever tried to hurt Beanpole again, I'd make sure he'd up in the hospital with two broken legs. This was backed by the other friends/tenants I had there. My brother is an idiot. But even he knew that pissing off my entire friend group was not a good idea. So he picked himself up off the ground and started leaving. But he clearly looked like he wanted to do something to my truck because he stopped and just stood there staring at it with his hands in his pockets, like he was debating scratching the paint with his keys. I yelled at him that I have CCTV. But then he turned around, pulled his pants part way down, and started rubbing his ass directly onto my truck's passenger side door. Then he forced out a nasty fart and said he sharted a little, and laughed like a nutbar when he took off. I immediately got the hose. I'm just glad I didn't leave windows open or doors unlocked. Otherwise he'd have done far worse. And the smell of what he did was pretty much what you'd think.
Everyone already knew Sara was never going to take him back. She avoided dating for years because my brother is so unhinged that she knew he'd do something like this. That's why she and her new boyfriend kept it secret. I went to ice my bruises and call Sara. But my brother was already calling and texting her. Over and over again, he wouldn't stop. He was begging she break up with her boyfriend and take him back. He even said he wanted to marry her and move to the northwest. Not sure why he specified that part of the US. Maybe because we live in the southeast. But she flatly told him no, never again, not happening even if hell froze over. He cried that it wasn't fair, because she was his first love (she wasn't), and they have a daughter together. Then he started sending her flowers, love letters and gifts. She sent them all back. Then she announced online that she and Beanpole had been dating for some time, and recently made plans to eventually move in together. That's when my brother really went off the deep end.
A few hours after he saw that post, my brother got wasted and then barged into Sara's parents' house by body ramming the back door. He actually cut his face because the door had a glass window. But he was so drunk that he didn't notice he was bleeding. Sara understandably freaked out, and my brother grabbed and tried to force her to kiss him. She pushed him away and he hit her for refusing him. He slapped her and threw her to the floor really hard like an angry pimp wanting his money. And his daughter saw it all and started screaming at the top of her lungs. Sara screamed too, and my brother fled. Police were called, and Sara was taken to the hospital. My brother threw her down so hard that she had a dislocated shoulder. My brother was found by police at his camper, where he was even more drunk than before, and half his face was covered in blood. He had to be taken to the hospital, where he got stitches. Then taken to jail. He got charged with trespassing, breaking and entering, and assault. (Surprisingly not DUI too, as he'd actually walked there) When our parents and I found out, well the family finally couldn't take it anymore, and went into an uproar. Our parents had it out with my brother after he bailed himself out from jail, and then he tried to fight our dad when they argued. And no surprise, he tried to blame everything on me.
My brother actually said I let Beanpole steal his woman. But couldn't really explain how. He also refused to believe I did not know until recently. Then he said that Sara was supposed to be his. Dad not only disagreed, but told my brother that he was a fucking disgrace, and that was an absolutely disgusting way to talk about Sara. She's not his property. And then my brother shoved dad as hard as he could. Dad got knocked to the floor, and my brother started kicking him. Dad isn't a small man. But he's old with a bad back and a bad knee. And needs a cane just to get around. Since we knew my brother would only have gotten crazier if he saw me, I was hiding in another room with the door cracked and listening in. I knew he might do something crazy. So I insisted on secretly being in the house when he was confronted. And I'm glad I was, because I came to dad's defense before my brother could do too much damage. I knew we were roughly even in a fight. So I ambushed and hit him in the back with a rubber mallet, and then beat the shit out of him. No police were called that time. I attacked him in defense of our dad. So he probably would have been screwed if he tried to get me charged anyway. And then he'd have gone right back to jail. Someone also once asked me if I enjoyed beating up my brother that day. I did not. I was just in an adrenaline fueled rage protecting my dad. But all things considered, I could have done far worse to my brother with that rubber mallet, as he only really got bruises. My dad gave hm a good smack in the face with his cane too though. But it's just hollow aluminum. Not exactly a damage dealer.
Our parents (mainly my dad) disowned my brother as I threw him out the door. And he spent some time crying on the porch and saying he was sorry and didn't mean it, then switched to saying we could all regret this, and we could go fuck ourselves before finally leaving. My mother spent hours crying. She'd stuck up for him before, and this was how he repaid her. My brother managed to avoid real prison time, or a trial for attacking Sara by taking a guilty plea deal. He signed away custody of his daughter. And Sara got a restraining order against him. My brother got a fine, somehow only a couple months in county jail, probation, has to abstain from alcohol for six months, and he had to pay for the property damage. Sara's dad already put in a new door, and billed my brother for it. My brother also understandably lost his job due to the situation.
Our mother secretly kept in contact with my brother, and agreed to look after my brother's truck and camper while he was serving his two month sentence. And she didn't ok it with dad first. He was pretty pissed at her for going behind his back. But she reasoned that it would be the last thing they ever did for him, because she didn't want my brother to have no place to go after getting out of the clink. And even she made it clear it was the last of her good will towards him too. Once my brother got out of jail, mom drove his truck and camper to a store to meet him, and gave him back the keys. She told me there was barely a word of thanks from him. Mostly just grunts when she tried to get him to talk to her. Dad said he still looked like an ungrateful sod. After that my brother lived wherever he could park his camper for a while until one of his remaining friends somehow got him a new job as a welder in another town 40-ish miles away that he was having to commute to with his camper for a while. But he was back every weekend. Apparently he only got the job by agreeing to work for less than what the job would normally pay. So he could move there permanently as soon as he got the ok from his probation officer. Which said officer didn't make easy I heard. I don't know the red tape of it. But he managed to pull it off. He can't leave the state. But he could still move to another county it seems. He's probably renting a space in a trailer park right now or something. And maybe he's back to doing his side hustle of hauling trash for people.
Before leaving town, my brother showed up outside my house to give me the double middle finger and dance around like a monkey while cursing at me in the street when he knew I was watching from the window. I guess it was his stupid way of trying to get in a last laugh without breaking the law or something. But then I got an idea. I've heard plenty of people say to kill with kindness. So I tried it in my own way. I grabbed an unopened bottle of my favorite honey whisky from the pantry because I know my brother really loves that stuff too. Then I went outside and walked right up to him, and shoved the bottle into his hands. I think it was the last thing he expected me to do in the moment. And I know he'd NEVER willingly break a bottle of good booze. Especially when it's free. Then I told him to have a drink on me to start his new life. I could barely keep myself from laughing when I turned to walk away. When I looked at my CCTV footage later, he actually stood there looking really glum while just staring at the bottle, and then moped back to his truck.
And then he was gone. Off to start his new life as a career welder. My brother is a childish, narcissistic, misogynistic, asshole to an extreme degree. But he's actually damn good at welding. Both with steel and aluminum. Mostly self-taught too. It's practically his only real talent. He's even done basic forging and auto body work. I've seen him do shit with scrap metal I wish I could. But that's the only real compliment I can still say about him. Maybe he'll make a decent new life and career for himself doing metal work elsewhere. He's better off away from us, just like we're better off away from him. He deleted all his social media, and I assume blocked us on everything. Not that we'd bother to contact him. One of his few remaining pothead friends in town told me my brother wants to legally change his name when his probation ends. Knowing him, he'll likely do it.
Things are much more peaceful and far less dramatic without my entitled leech of a brother here. Some part of me missed him for a while. But he's just a terrible person. And the only one who's still missing him, is our mother. She's still kinda broken up about it. But dad has been unwavering that they did the right thing by disowning him. He made his own bed. Now he's lying in it. I doubt my brother will come back any time soon. And if he does, he will not be welcome.
Edit: Got home and cracked open a bag of salt & pepper pork rinds, and was half expecting hundreds of comments like last time. I'm thankful it wasn't. Still, I'm also thankful to everyone who gave their support. To answer some questions I got in comments and DMS. I've got cameras inside and outside my house. Beanpole and Sara are still dating. But they've put off moving in together for now. My niece is doing good. But says she has no daddy anymore. My brother was barely a father to her anyway. Yes I know it was a bit much giving a known alcoholic a bottle of booze. And good booze at that. But I knew he wouldn't be able to drink it for months anyway. Which is why I was trying so hard to hold back laughter when I gave it to him. Besides, he's just gonna drink like a fish on his own dime when his court ordered sober time runs out.
I'm hoping this is the last post about current antics involving my brother. Maybe I'll tell other past stories about him. Or the story of my cheating ex. Still couldn't bring myself to post that. I typed it out and everything. But I guess it still ate at me because I really liked that woman. And yeah, this situation with my brother eats at me too. But he's toxic. And I'm better off without him in my life anymore.
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Related Posts:
My entitled brother wanted my cot and tent for the camping trip
The time my brother stayed over and stole all the alcohol from my fridge
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THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7

Like the title says my frostfall will not work. Here is the mod list I'm using.

1. USSEP
   
2. Campfire: Complete Camping System
   
3. Papermaker
   
4. Simple Workaround Framework
   
5. Cutting Room Floor
   
6. Realistic Ragdolls and Force
   
7. Frostfall: Hypothermia
   
8. It's Just Time: A Dynamic Timescale
   
9. Dino Spell Discovery
   
10. Nordic UI
    
11. TK Interface Overhaul
    
12. TK Skin - Sensible Flavour
    
13. SWF: Tailor SWF
    
14. Nordic UI SWF HUD
    
15. YOT - Your Own Thoughts
    
16. YOT - Frostfall Patch
    
17. Oblivion Font
    
18. Updated Categorized Favorites Menu
    
19. Kontrol- Updated
    
20. Kyne's Temple Consequences
    
21. Voiced Narrative AE AΙΟ
    
22. Thieves Guild Alternative Endings
    
23. Poison Love Letters
    
24. Companion's Dialogue Bundle
    
25. Dialogue Expansion - Shor's Stone
    
26. Dialogue Expansion - Khajiit Caravans
    
27. Dialogue Expansion - Riften
    
28. Dialogue Expansion - Imperial Soldiers
    
29. Face Sculptor Expanded
    
30. Extended Guard Dialogue
    
31. Extended Bandit Dialogue
    
32. Kachunk - Creation Club Crossbow Distribution
    
33. Cloaks and Capes 1k
    
34. Wearable Lanterns
    
35. Ars Metallica
    
36. Simple Inn Bath
    
37. Dirt and Blood
    
38. Dirt and Blood Script Fix
    
39. Just Blood
    
40. Headhunter - Bounties Redone
    
41. Headhunter Campfire Support
    
42. Crime Overhaul
    
43. Skyrim's Got Talent
    
44. Decorator Helper
    
45. Wintersun - Faiths of Skyrim
    
46. Humble Beginning's - A Lightweight Class Mod
    
47. Instincts - Animal Taming in Skyrim
    
48. Enemy Health Indicators
    
49. Rent My House - A Landlord Mod
    
50. Landlord
    
51. INeed - Food Water and Sleep - Continued
    
52. INeed - Extended
    
53. Debug Menu
    
54. Andromeda - Unique Standing Stones of Skyrim
    
55. Growl - Werebeasts of Skyrim
    
56. Sacrosanct - Vampires of Skyrim
    
57. Sacrosanct - Config Menu
    
58. Sacrosanct - Moonlit Waters
    
59. Perk Points at 50, 75, and 100
    
60. Skill Zeroer for Xbone Users
    
61. Ordinator - Perks of Skyrim
    
62. Eldritch Batter - Magicka Reloded
    
63. Apocalypse - Magic of Skyrim SWF Edition
    
64. Odin - Skyrim Magic Overhaul SWF Edition
    
65. Odin - Ordinator Compatibility Patch
    
66. Apocalypse - Ordinator
    
67. Enhanced Atronachs - With Luminosity
    
68. Immersive Spell Effects Emit Light
    
69. Less Visually Obstructive Cloak Spells
    
70. Dino Spell Discovery - Apocalypse Patch
    
71. Dino Spell Discovery - Odin (Base)
    
72. Real Bosses
    
73. Dragon War - A Dragon Overhaul
    
74. Madmen - Forsworn Overhaul AE Edition
    
75. Improved Bandits - Complete Bandit Overhaul
    
76. Fair Dragon Shouts
    
77. Summermyst - Enchantments of Skyrim
    
78. C.O.I.N- Coins of Interesting Natures
    
79. More Thalmor Dossiers
    
80. Open World Loot (OWL) - Loot and Encounter Zone Overhaul
    
81. OWL Randomized Loot Add-on
    
82. Open World Loot - C.O.I.N Patch
    
83. OWL - Summermyst Patch
    
84. Merchant - A Trading Expansion
    
85. No Vendor Spell Tomes: USSEP
    
86. Journeyman - A Fast Travel Overhaul
    
87. Realistic Item Rebalance
    
88. CC Bow of Shadows Lingering Invisibility Fix
    
89. Improved Dragon Priest Masks
    
90. Improved Gauldur Amulet
    
91. DINO Spell Discovery - Ancient Texts Patch
    
92. Audio SFX Overhaul - No Voices, No Water
    
93. Unique Battle Music
    
94. Celtic Music: Fear a Bhata
    
95. True Storms
    
96. Obsidian Weathers and Seasons
    
97. Patch - True Storms and Obsidian Weathers
    
98. Veydosebrom Regions - A Grass Overhaul
    
99. 3D Veydosebrom Regions
    
100. Mefariah's Grass Fixed for Creation Club
     
101. Happy Little Trees - Larger
     
102. Happy Little Trees - DLC Trees
     
103. XP32
     
104. The Ultimate Dodge Mod Reborn
     
105. I'm Glad You're Here
     
106. Lilbadjj's Get Up Animation
     
107. No Spinning Death Animation
     
108. TUDM - Script Fixes
     
109. Comprehensive First Person Animation Overhaul
     
110. RBE's Enhanced First Person Camera
     
111. First Person Camera Sway
     
112. 25% Lower 1st Person Weapons
     
113. Dynamic Impact - Slash Effects
     
114. All of the Noble Skyrim Series (minus the SMIM)
     
115. Noble Skyrim: Whiterun Wall Fix
     
116. Skyland Happy Little Trees
     
117. Dirt and Blood HD Retexture
     
118. Dirt and Blood - Seamless Soap Texture
     
119. Jarl's Complete Character Overhaul Lite
     
120. Elven Ears for Breton
     
121. Divergence - Clothing Pack - 512
     
122. Simply Realistic Weapons and Armor
     
123. Unique Thank Weapons
     
124. 2022 Ultimate HD Fire Effects
     
125. Deadly Spell Effects
     
126. Enhanced Blood Textures
     
127. Dynamic Impact and Enhanced Blood Textures Patch
     
128. Lockpicking Interface Redone
     
129. Sky Collection: Galaxy of Nirn
     
130. Dawn Water w/ Natural Waterfalls
     
131. Al Overhaul Scripted
     
132. Smart NPCS - Enemies Use Potions
     
133. Search and Destroy
     
134. Talkative Enemies
     
135. ELFX - Updated
     
136. ELFX Fixes
     
137. Flickering Meshes Fix - ELFX
     
138. JK's Skyrim AIO
     
139. JK's Skyrim - Al Overhaul Patch
     
140. JK's Skyrim Cutting Room Floor Patch
     
141. JK's Interiors AIO:
     
142. CC Patch
     
143. JK's Skyrim Patch
     
144. Al Overhaul Patch
     
145. EIFX Patch
     
146. USSEP Patch
     
147. ALT Start Patch
     
148. ELFX Fixes Patch
     
149. Expanded Carriage Services
     
150. The Midden: Expanded
     
151. JK's Interiors AIO Midden Expanded Patch
     
152. Missives By Irondusk33
     
153. Missives - Notes Retextu
     
154. Echoes of the Vale
     
155. Legendary Dungeons: Dwarven
     
156. ELFX Exterior Fixes
     
157. JK's Skyrim - ELFX EXT. Patch
     
158. ELFX Shadows
     
159. ELFX Shadows Heartfire Light Addon
     
160. ELFX Shadows - ELFX Exteriors
     
161. ELFX Shadows - JK's Interiors
     
162. ELFX Shadows - USSEP Patch
     
163. Wildcat - Combat of Skyrim
     
164. Mortal Combat - Fast-Paced Combat
     
165. Half Stamina While Blocking
     
166. Chubbs' Difficulty Redone
     
167. Lucien
     
168. More Thalmor Dossiers - Lucien Patch
     
169. Lucien - Moon and Star Patch
     
170. Lucien - Anniversary Edition Patch
     
171. Inigo
     
172. Snazzy Items for Inigo
     
173. Inigo - Bloodchill Manor Patch
     
174. Moon and Star
     
175. Moon and Star: Immersion Patch
     
176. East Empire Expansion
     
177. Unmasking Sybille
     
178. Dark Destiny - Become A Vampire Unwillingly
     
179. Convenient Horses
     
180. Train and Study
     
181. Violence - A Killmove Mod
     
182. Imperious - Races of Skyrim
     
183. Lore-Based Heights for Skyrim
     
184. Geometric Stat Growth
     
185. Alternate Start - Live Another Life
     
186. New Beginnings - Live Another Life Expansion
     
187. ELFX Shadows - Alternate Start Patch
     
188. At Your Own Pace AIO
     
189. Jayserpa's Quest Expansion
     
190. Jayserpa's Quest Expansion - USSEP Patch
     
191. Jayserpa's Quest Expansion - CC Bow of Shadows Patch
     
192. At Your Own Pace - Quest Expansion Patch
     
193. Realistic Conversations
     

I would appreciate the help and thank you in advanced!
Edit- Also any mod that's Creation club I don't have in this mod list I copy and pasted it from a friend and idk what is Creation club from the top of my head very sorry 😅

Hello, I just received a letter from my neighborhood's HOA about overdue fines for violations that happened several months before I started renting while the house was vacant, and the letter is threatening legal action against the landlord for breach of contract if they are not paid soon. I do not see anything in my lease about informing them of fines that occurred before the lease period, nor do I see anything about forwarding any letters addressed to them. What is my legal obligation here, and would not informing them constitute a risk on lease renewal?
EDIT: The reason I am asking for legal advice first instead of just doing it is because my landlord has made it clear with their actions thus far that they are only willing to do the bare legal minimum so I will be doing the same.

Hello, I live in Iowa. I have an emotional support animal letter from my therapist of many years. My landlords denied an emotional support animal saying they have a no pet policy. It’s currently going through all the hoopla courts and what not. Anyways, my emotional support animal passed away a few months ago after the heart break and time. I’m ready to open my heart and my home to a new little ball of love. I put in an application to meet some at the local animal rescue. They denied my application saying they are unable to approve me due to my landlord. Is it okay for them to deny me based on my landlords discrimination, considering they under the law and being held up in the eyes of the government and HUD, have no legal right to deny me.

Hi all 1 room in our 3bed 2bath apartment is opening up July 1st for move in.
Located in Ridgewood off the Forest M stop. It is a second floor walk up, laundry in unit, AC as well as a dishwasher and there will be a kitten and cat in the apartment so no pets please, we are 420 friendly as well.
The rent is split equally amongst everyone so 1167.66 per room, utilities are not included they run about 100-150 we have all amenities from A/C dishwasher and Laundry. The neighborhood is very quiet and chill with a bunch of cafes around there is a new grocery store opening up on the same block as the apartment!
Ideally looking for someone who wants to hop on the lease with us, guarantors are accepted as well! Let me know and I can direct you to my landlord for further details. Usual requirements 40x rent 680+ credit rental reference letter unless you are using a guarantor then 80x rent and they need to have a credit score of 700.
About the roommates:
*Im Julio 27 year old queer from Miami Florida. I usually hang with my friends or partner most of the time, love to be with my kitten love to cook or stay in my room when I’m home also down to watch a movie or hang w roommates. I’m a server at a fancy Japanese restaurant in greenpoint so I spend most of my nights/weekends there.

• JV is 26 gay/queer working in graphic design. He loves concerts/nights out, video games, reading, hiking, and his cat Simba who turns 2 this September 🙂

We’re looking for someone who is clean and pays rent on time and wants to join this cozy apartment in Ridgewood! I have pictures!!!

Hello, i have been living in my apartment for the last 3 years and i have no problem with my landlord. He is really going person and whenever i need something related with apartment he helps. However, one thing is concerning me that i have never received this letter from him and i asked already couple of times and he said to me that its fine if you overused the gas a bit no worries.
My question is that, i heard that i could use it for tax return so i really want it. Should i be worried if he wants to charge me for the last couple years together?
Many thanks for advices.

Me and my roommate moved in together in September of last year. I found us the apartment, went on all the tours, met with the landlord, and all she had to do was sign the lease. She and I are on one lease together for one year, so it’s up at the end of August this year. We’ve gotten along well for the most part, we never spent a ton of time together while living together. If I had a problem, I would come to her about it. We both work and don’t have a ton of money.
A couple months ago she let me know she was planning on breaking the lease agreement and finding someone to take her half of the lease over. I said that was fine but that finding someone would be her responsibility since she was breaking the lease. It’s been a few months and so far she’s brought me one person to tour the place to move in. This person is younger than me and doesn’t have a job. Also my roommate failed to list our place as the correct rent amount on Facebook marketplace. She listed it as $800 when the cost is $825 without utilities included. She was expecting the sub-letter to pay her half of the deposit that she paid when she moved in ($825).
I recently got a new job that pays a lot more and I didn’t want to stress about finding a new roommate on her short notice. I told her I would just take over the whole lease. She then asked me if I would be paying her the $825 of her deposit back. I said no, I don’t have that money and I’m not moving out anytime soon. She is telling me I’m stealing $1600 from her because she paid rent through May and her half of the deposit. This makes no sense to me since that money goes to our landlord and not me and I won’t be getting a deposit back since I’m not planning to move anytime soon.
I’m also pregnant and didn’t want to have to share my space with anyone after my baby comes. If I let a roommate move in and sublet and they want to renew the lease, I can’t say no. I wouldn’t have that option anymore. I told my roommate that since she is breaking her lease, she put herself in this situation. She’s so mad at me and I’m just wondering if I really am doing something wrong. My landlord told me I don’t have to pay her but she’s insisting that I’m the one fucking her over when she made the decision to break the lease agreement.
Am I the asshole?