I’m seeking a Creativity, Arts, and Wellness Accountability Partner, and a Life, Entrepreneurial, and Goals Accountability Partner.
Creativity, Arts, and Wellness Accountability Partner: writing, arts, crafts, spirituality, wellness, psychology and journaling are areas of focus and improvement.
Let’s discuss and develop strategies to overcome perfectionist tendencies that might stem from procrastination.
Let’s compare and contrast methods to successfully replace bad habits with good/positive/healthy habits.
I'm looking for the best combination of virtual (text, phone calls, Skype or Telegram) and local (NYC) on-site Accountability Partners.
My ideal AP is late 30s to late 40s, female or male, creative, entrepreneurial, and practices weekly wellness and self-help.
Do you journal, meditate, workout? What have you been doing, what are you doing to show up for yourself, first?
I'm available two or three times a week for check-ins, for sixty-minute strategy sessions to keep us afloat, focused, and motivated. I expect the same from you. Nonnegotiable.
Do you have the energy, personality, and stamina to support and encourage someone else even if you were to temporarily stumble?
Please don’t contact me to (1) help you wake up or get to sleep on-time, (2) to help you perform daily functions not listed above.
Accountability Partners are voluntary and mutually-rewarding. You must be committed to the process for at least three months to see results.
If you're looking and ready for someone to help keep you honest about what you say you want and need in your life, send a Reddit email with your age, location, availability three weekdays and one weekend afternoon, what you're working on that you're seeking an AP, and why you'd be possible good/great fit as my AP.

(TL;DR - I run a module written by a DM from another group, it goes off the rails, I allow it, we have fun, and the other DM completely loses their shit on me when they hear about it a few years later.)
This one is hopefully going to be fun, the original event happened a number of years ago, and the end of the event is fairly recent, so a lot of the earlier details are a little bit fuzzy but I can definitely relate the story.
Back in my game store days, I was the DM of one of two consistent Dungeons & Dragons groups at my LGS. The other DM and I really weren't friends, and I can't say we even actually liked each other, but we had a mutual respect and we had a few common players in our respective games.
One day the other DM approached me with a folder of papers. He said he had written a module that he was thinking of publishing and he wanted to have other DMs run the game with a few different groups at the same time so that he can have usable feedback. I told him I would read it and then I would try running it with my group.
It wasn't bad. Not exactly the best writing, there were some small spelling and grammar mistakes, but not anything incomprehensible. The plot basically involves a corrupt treasurer of a merchant guild blackmailing the player characters into doing a long series of side quests because he could very easily frame them for an event they witness.
The thing about this was that the writer spent a considerable amount of effort in writing contingencies so that the villain in the story could not be killed too early because it would ultimately result in the players getting framed for the event anyway. Kind of heavy-handed railroading, but I would give it a shot.
The corrupt merchant guild treasurer was Harvey. He was a smarthy middle-aged half-elf with what was described as a "manipulative personality"; None of that is actually relevant to the story.
My players decided that instead of trying to investigate the potential murder of another merchant guild office holder, they were going to try to loot Harvey's office before meeting him.
While the players are looting, Harvey walks back into his office after paying for the hit on the other office holder, one of the party members panics and wins the initiative before Harvey can even speak. Two natural 20s later, Harvey is dead.
Well shit.
The thing is, the way the module was written, every opportunity the players would have to kill him early, there would be witnesses and contingencies. This particular event did not, and wasn't exactly planned for in the original writing. When the players characters search him, and find out who he is, the players collectively panic and try to find a way to get out of the situation without having the whole town after them.
So after about 30 minutes of in and out of character discussion among the players, they eventually came to an agreement...
They were going to try to keep up a charade where everybody in town thought Harvey was still alive and that they were his best friends looking out for him enough for the events of the story to resolve themselves.
"Hold on, you guys are going to actually try to do a Weekend at Bernie's on this?"
"Well, what other options do we have? We are in big trouble otherwise! "
Every single time something like this happens, I am famous for saying four very specific words…
"Okay, roll for it."
Potentially 15 sessions worth of dark political conspiracy then proceeded to turn into 22 sessions of black comedy gold.
Finally at the end, one of the other merchant guild office holders storms into Harvey's office while the players characters are in the next room trying to explain to a town guard that the reason Harvey is slumped in his chair is because he's drunk. In full view of the party and the guard through an open dividing wall, the other merchant proceeds to start stabbing Harvey multiple times. The other merchant guild member is promptly arrested for Harvey's murder, and the players are praised for being true friends to Harvey and the town, and are invited to his funeral.
The hilarious thing is that this end result was in fact one of the possible endings that the original author had written into the module (merchant guild member murders Harvey and frees the PCs of the blackmail). My players just had a really messed up way of getting there though.
I went back to the other DM, handed him back the folder, told him that the players loved it, we took a few liberties, but they ended up getting what he called "Ending C" in the DM notes. He asked me for constructive criticism, and I gave him the pretty basic stuff but also mentioned a couple extra contingencies to try to keep the plot from being too inflexible.
We didn't talk about this for a few years, then I bumped into his game group when I came back in to browse the scene at my LGS a couple of weeks ago. DM greeted me and explained that the group was playing the revised version of his module for the fourth time with different characters, trying to get each of the different endings. While we were talking I ended up letting it slip just how off the rails that module got when I ran it.
I didn't think it was a big deal, But that DM proceeded to get fairly angry and offended. He asked me specifically what happened and I explained that they rather accidentally killed Harvey at the very beginning of the module and pretended he was still alive for 22 sessions just so that they would not get arrested. Two of the players at the table started to laugh hysterically, one of the players looked genuinely horrified and the DM got pissed and raised his voice.
"YOU ACTUALLY LET THEM DO THAT!? THAT'S NOT HOW THE TONE OF THE STORY IS SUPPOSED TO GO!"
I tried telling him it wasn't a big deal, told him it was just a game and that the players had a blast, but he wasn't having any of it. He told me if I was going to "defile" his writing, I should at least keep the tone consistent with the original work and tell him when it happens. I apologized, but he demanded that I leave the room. I just turned and left.
Over the ensuing week I heard from a couple of different people that this guy was cursing my name left and right and how in someway I betrayed his trust by letting the game get that way. Worst yet he somehow found my number so that he could bombard me with angry text messages about the subject. Tried to text him an apology and an explanation, but I'm pretty sure he blocked me. Haven't talked to him since.
I understand that it was his brainbaby of sorts, but I can't help but feel like this is a complete overreaction. Not to mention he clearly had it edited such that he was happy enough to run it four times and was satisfied with it. I wouldn't personally hold this kind of thing against anybody that did this very thing with one of my games. What do you guys think?

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DONT BE MEAN TO ME PLEASE I AM JUST ASKING A QUESTION
so only recently was my SDA application put it took ages to get the OT and everything to do the stuff for it but its in. Anyway im wondering if there anything i can do to speed it up or that my suppot corrindator can do. I have been homeless sleeping on the streets for over over 2 months straight (since i had to leave my rental)(minus the week I spent in hospital)
I've been on public housing waitlist for over a year however because I have special requirements for housing due to my disability meaning I need a house with certain features or without certain features it means it is taking a very long time for one to be available. So I am disabled and without support at the moment because i cant get support living on the streets and because my funding is like 10 dollars left and I have been waiting 6 months for my change of circumstance put in a complaint for that and had MP contact them twice but still not done anything yet. Every services turns me away for reasons including

• being a girl not male
• my disability under 21 rate support pension is too low for them to do anything ( i just turned 19 a couple days ago)
• I need special housing requirements
• wont help me because i have lots of medical conditions and disabilities

Apparently sda can take like 12 months so am I just meant to try to not die on the streets in this time? Also winter is in like 10 days. I literally just be laying on the ground most of the time. Because im disabled and cannot go far can barely make it to the store to get food and get so lost trying to find it and end up like dropping my money all over the store floor and then cannot find what i am trying to find and then end up dropping my food on floor while trying to check out and its just so hard. I have alot of serve food allergies too which is hard when you cannot cook anything. And I can only shower every few weeks when I go to public beach shower (i went to homeless organizations that are meant to offer showers but got turned away for being a girl even tho there is nothing on their website saying its not allowed). I have not had clean clothes for over 2 months either. I have alot of hard time getting places and carrying stuff and buying stuff because i just drop all my money on floor and cannot really count it.
Not sure how I am going to not die soon?? Also I am not even on medicine anymore because it is too complicated for me to take myself and i lost it. when I had like the hospital social worker and stuff (I came in because i was having medical heart emergency so a ambualnce just took me) they were like oh well you have been homeless for ages now so you can just wait for public housing and continue what youre doing. I go into public housing and they just tell me to wait for SDA and when I have contacted NDis they tell me to just wait for public housing as apparently it will be quicker. Hm
also I have 0 family or friends so.
Im in sydney if reveleant
help appericated.

I've been seeing these pop up on guys a little bit more lately but not sure how to find them to purchase. When I search online I only see regular compression shirts after trying different search terms. Has anyone had success finding these for sale from different online or brick & mortar stores?
Here's an example from a recent game with Bryce James https://ibb.co/r6HYVkt

I am working on my thesis, and I’m using onshape student license for my designs. I have successfully created the models but I’m unsure of how to do FEA on some parts that I have. I am seeing mixed results online some stating that FEA is integrated into onshape, while others require add ons from the app store. I watched the onshape live 2023 video on simulation but for me there is no load options on the toolbar as they have used.
I do have ANSYS access through my university but I would prefer to use onshape FEA if its integrated and available for student license.

Awkward position; my mom’s long-time financial advisor (30 years plus) upped her fee rate to 1.25% (from 1.0). She has over $1M with them and this seems ridiculous.
Further, I finally got a peek into her account when she was frustrated that she had no gains at the end of April for the year. I told her I was up 10% for Q1 then lost half of it in April, it has rebounded in May.
But I am very put off by some of their choices. Is it normal for an FA to buy individual stocks? All I’ve seen before is ETFs and mutual funds.
They seem to be value-trap investing. Verizon, Intel, Pfizer, and my least favorite, Lucid. They are continuing to monthly buy shares of all of these companies and have large losing positions on all of them. None of them are huge; $5-$20k each. But they have some huge loss percentages.
I’m thinking of contacting them to ask them to stop building positions in these stocks and stick to funds. And try to get her rate back to 1.0%.
I also think I will see if she will take 10% of the account and roll it into an account I manage. Thinking the same equity/bond mix but just in VTI and a general bonnd fund and give her a comparison point to her manager.
Any other suggestions? I’m mostly worried about the value trap investing but I’d like to eventually take over her management for her for free. My 401k has more than doubled the returns of her account over the last 5 years (partly because I’m more aggressively in stocks), and even in 2022 her losses were only a few % less than mine. She’s been working with them for decades and I don’t want her to feel bad about her decisions. But, she already is disappointed with their performance.

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Emperor Karl V reacted to the Jiajing Emperor's invitation to bring tribute the way Mendoza had predicted he would: indifference. He was only vaguely aware of the fact Spain was in an undeclared war with China, and had only heard about the Battle of Acapulco in passing. Sending diplomats to present tribute to and grovel before the monarch of some Asian country wasn't in his wheelhouse—and he would've been even less interested if he knew that his diplomats would be meeting with one of the emperor's ministers rather than the emperor himself. Meanwhile, Antonio de Mendoza went to take up the viceregal office of Peru, where he soon caught his death of an unspecified illness.
Nevertheless, the agreement between Wei Chengjia and Bai Guguan held. Bai stopped sponsoring pirates. The NSS purchased more silver than needed, selling the excess off to Wei. Wei then sold it at cost to Bai, who sent it to China. Convoluted as it was, this system succeeded at keeping the peace.
Or at least, at keeping the peace between Xinguo and Mexico. All the pirates Bai Guguan had been sponsoring didn't simply go home: they'd gained an appetite for silk, silver, and other luxury goods. With their sponsorship dried up, they went into business for themselves. Wokou raids were now hitting the coasts of Xinguo with rapidly increasing frequency. New forts were built to repel them. Wei and Bai even agreed to a joint fortification of the Jaw, the strait that connects the open ocean to the Bay at the centre of the Valley where North and South provinces border each other. They built the Teeth forts, one on the northern tip of the Jaw and the other on the south. These were successful at keeping pirates out of the Bay itself, but they did little to dissuade attacks on the outlying coastal settlements.
What followed was the Anti-Piracy War (1553 – 1569), during which the Nine Anti-Piracy Expeditions invaded the Wokou's home territory far, far to the north in an attempt to rescue hostages and punish the pirates for their impudence.The geography of the region is difficult with choppy seas that constantly threaten to dash your ships on the many islands, and the innumerable bays and inlets not only make it easy to get lost, they provide perfect cover for ambushes.
That, however, is another story for another time. To put a long story short, the results were less than stellar for Xinguo. The most charismatic of the Wokou leaders was killed in the Battle of the Jaw (1569), and his followers fell into infighting. This enabled Xinguo to play the various factions off each other to the point where they were too distracted fighting other pirate gangs to launch any more major raids on Xinguo. Although the raids never ceased entirely, this was considered to be the end of the Anti-Piracy War.
Meanwhile, an undeclared peace settled over the undeclared war between China and Spain. With that, the Xinguans and Mexicans slowly became more familiar with each other, learned more about each other, and strengthened their economic ties. Ningbo was flourishing under the Treasure Fleet's attention. NSS merchants would buy silk, porcelain, tea, spices from the Indies, and other goods from Asia and bring them to Acapulco, where they traded for silver, cocoa, tobacco, spices from Mexico, and other goods.
However, Spanish merchants began to grow dissatisfied with this arrangement. Figuring they could get the same goods for a lower price if they went to the source, Spanish merchants began showing up in Ningbo with cargo holds full of New World goods to trade with the Treasure Fleet directly. NSS merchants immediately complained to Wei Chengjia that this would limit their profits. The NSS being the powerful lobby group that it was, their opinion prevailed and Wei decreed that only members of the NSS and DSS could trade with the Treasure Fleet directly. Some Spaniards applied for membership in the NSS, but were of course rejected.
Meanwhile, Dongguang fell into an economic slump. Businesses that had once thrived while servicing the Treasure Fleet were now closing up shop or barely staying afloat. Many packed up and moved their businesses to Ningbo. To pick up the slack, Bai Guguan pressured the DSS into accepting the Spaniards who were now applying for membership in their guild after being turned down by the NSS. The DSS resisted of course, since they didn't want a slough of foreigners taking over the guild. However, both Bai and the Spaniards painted a picture of soaring profits for them. Having members of their own guild with insider's knowledge and connections in Mexico could only be a good thing. Soon, Spaniards were showing up in Ningbo with DSS membership badges. Wei was forced to permit them to do business, but he didn't have to like it. He even passed a new law prohibiting non-Chinese, foreign-born individuals from staying the night inside the city walls, forcing them to stay in Dongguang or in small towns outside Ningbo.
In 1562, the Spaniards with DSS membership pooled their money and bought land along the Dongguang waterfront, where they built a warehouse with an adjoining office, and a pier. Savvy local businessmen built an inn, a pub, and a brothel nearby by to service the merchants and their crews. Many in Dongguang disliked this and complained to Bai Guguan that these foreigners were becoming too comfortable here. They shouldn't be allowed to own property, especially not inside the city walls. Bai, however, recognised the benefits of letting them stay, so he ignored the naysayers. Thus, the foundations of the Foreign District had been laid. Its size and prosperity would ebb and flow over the years, but it would eventually grow to be one of Dongguang's richest and most important districts.
Bai Guguan's welcoming of the Spaniards into Dongguang and even into membership with the DSS displeased Wei Chengjia. Wei decided to get back at him by refusing to sell silver at cost to Bai. This was no longer necessary for Bai, since he could now buy silver from the Spaniards who came to Dongguang, so Wei's feeble attempt at petty revenge had no serious effect. What it did mean, however, was that the treaty the two men had signed under the auspices of Cui Hejing was now as good as dead.
During this time, a linguistic shift began. Up until the 1560s, Nahuatl had been the trade language between Xinguans and Spaniards. Xinguan merchants had already been speaking it in order to trade with the Aztecs, and in the mid-16^th century, it was still a major administrative language of New Spain. Beginning in the 1560s, Spanish gradually replaced Nahuatl. Most Xinguan merchants spoke either Wu (for the northerners) or Yue (for the southerners), which are mutually unintelligible. Others spoke Min, Hakka, Cham, Vietnamese, or some other language. Amongst themselves, the merchants wrote in Classical Chinese and spoke in either Mandarin or one of their own languages. Not everyone spoke Mandarin, however. Humans, whatever their nationality, tend to gravitate toward the simplest solution, and to be able to do business with Spaniards, the simplest solution was for everyone to learn Spanish.
1565 would become a pivotal year in Sino-Spanish relations, and therefore, an important year in Xin-Mei relations. That was the year the Spanish conquistador Miguel Lopez de Legazpi invaded the Philippine island of Cebu and established the first permanent Spanish presence in the archipelago. This may not have been earth-shattering in and of itself, but it meant Spain was now expanding into China's sphere of influence. Tondo, a city on the island of Luzon just down the coast from the future capital of Manila, had long been a tributary of China and was the gateway for Chinese culture, trade goods, and political influence into the Philippines. In 1570 Spain conquered Manila, and the vagaries of politics soon brought it into conflict with Tondo, and therefore with China. Chinese troops were dispatched to the Philippines and fought with the Spaniards, whose army had relatively few actual Spaniards in it, with the bulk being made up of Filipinos and indigenous Mexicans.
The details of that conflict are beyond the scope of this work. What's important for us is how it affected Xin-Mei relations.
[Next]

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This interesting article on the "Lords of War" discusses Ryoichi Sasakawa, who called himself "the world's richest fascist", and was a major financial backer of the post-war Aikikai, and his cell-mate from Sugamo Prison, Yoshio Kodama, the ultra-nationalist Yakuza "fixer" who become known to the West during the Lockheed scandals.
https://www.voltairenet.org/article30028.html
Former International Aikido Federation chairman Peter Goldsbury recounts meeting Ryoichi Sasakawa:
"In 1984 I was elected IAF Assistant General Secretary, in succession to K Chiba Shihan. After this election an unusual episode occurred. I had a meeting with Kisaburo Osawa, who was General Director of the Hombu, and was requested to visit the Aikikai Hombu the following day. In particular, I was expected to wear a suit and tie and have with me my meishi [名刺: name cards] from Hiroshima University. I duly arrived at the Hombu and met Doshu Kisshomaru Ueshiba and Osawa Shihan. A car was waiting and Doshu got in and invited me to get in, too. We were seen off by Osawa Shihan and drove to Akasaka in the center of Tokyo and there met the IAF General Secretary, Mr Seko. After some coffee—and this was the only time ever that I was served coffee by the Aikido Doshu, who had insisted taking a tray and waiting in line at the senondescript building and were introduced to an elderly man with white hair, sitting behind a truly enormous desk. This was also the only time in my experience that I saw Doshu very much in the junior position, making a deep bow to someone who did not respond in kind. I was introduced and my meishi duly requested, with the white-haired man clearly showing his approval. After a few more minutes of mutual pleasantries, the meeting ended and we were driven back to the Aikikai Hombu. I was profusely thanked by Doshu and also by Osawa Sensei—and left the Hombu completely bewildered by what had happened. All I knew was that the white-haired man was known as Sasakawa Ryoichi Sensei. Later, back in Hiroshima, I asked my aikido teacher who Sasakawa Ryoichi Sensei was and he was very surprised that I had actually met him. He said that Sasakawa was the millionaire ‘godfather’ of Japan. He was an ex-war criminal who had made his fortune from betting and controlled a vast network of influence and contacts within the Japanese government establishment. I learned later that he regularly donated a substantial sum of money to the Aikikai and that this was the reason for our formal visit.
I mention all this because I also learned later that it was Ryoichi Sasakawa who suggested to Doshu Kisshomaru that the IAF join GAISF, which is the acronym for the General Association of International Sports Federations. I also realized that, coming as it did from Sasakawa, the suggestion was one that could not easily be rejected. The result was another source of acute bewilderment for Japanese teachers, who had taught their students that aikido did not have championships or competitions and could be called a ‘sport’ only if the term was being used extremely loosely. "

• Aikido and the IAF: Some Personal Reflections, by former IAF Chairman Peter Goldsbury

Note that the Aikikai today continues friendly relations with the Sasakawa Foundation.
The attached CIA file notes that Kodama was strongly influenced by Morihei Ueshiba's close friend Shumei Okawa, who ran a pan-Asian indoctrination center for young Japanese men at which Morihei Ueshiba was an instructor.
Yoshio Kodama's CIA file
Morihei Ueshiba remained friendly with Okawa, who, along with Ryoichi Sasakawa and Yoshio Kodama, was held in Sugamo Prison as a class A war criminal. It's worth noting that Morihei Ueshiba maintained a close friendship with Okawa well after the war, until his passing in 1957.
Yoshio Kodama was also arrested in connection with the League of Blood Incident committed by Nissho Inoue, another associate of Morihei Ueshiba, and his terrorist group, the Katsumeidan, the "League of Blood".
Inoue was part of the inner circle of the Sakurakai terrorist group formed by Kingoro Hashimoto (who twice tried to overthrow the civilian government of Japan, once with Morihei Ueshiba's participation) that met at Morihei Ueshiba's Kobukan Dojo and included Taku Mikami (later responsible for the assassination of Prime Minister Inukai Tsuyoshi, and who would hide with Morihei Ueshiba in Iwama after the war), and the aforementioned Shumei Okawa.
Kodama was also connected to the Nihon Seinensya, which was founded in 1961, and remains today one of the largest right wing ultra-nationalist organizations in Japan. The Nihon Seinensya was established under the umbrella of the Sumiyoshi-kai yakuza syndicate through the effort of Morihei Ueshiba's close associate Kohinata Hakuro - at the time that this was happening Kohinata Hakuro was on the board of directors of the Aikikai Foundation. His assistant later said "wherever we went, East or West, the members of the Nihon Seinensya and the Sumiyoshi-kai treated him like a god". The Nihon Seinensya was attached to an activist division loyal to Yoshio Kodama under the Zen Nihon Aikokusha Dantai Kaigi right wing umbrella organization that Kodama himself established, the Seinen Shiso Kenkyukai (Society for the Study of Youth Ideology), which represented a hard core within the umbrella organization, and was composed mainly of yakuza members.

I wanted to share my recent experience in adjusting my wife/my portfolios using Morningstar. We recently left Vanguard Personal Advisor Select (PAS) and moved our portfolios to Schwab. We took the one week free subscription to Morningstar (I was a previous subscriber) and then made some minor adjustments to the 100% Vanguard only portfolios (inherited from PAS) in both our IRA’s and brokerage portfolios. Morningstar has all kinds of model portfolios for ETF’s, mutual funds, etc. plus its individual ratings of gold, silver, bronze and neutral for ETF’s/funds and associated analytical write-up’s. Finally, there are extensive comparison performance charts by month/1 year and then 3, 5, and 10 year charts against peer ETF’s/funds. Based on these Morningstar tools, I switched out Vanguard International Growth ETF for Dimensional International Core Equity ETF and bronze rated Vanguard Extended Market ETF for gold rated Vanguard Mid-Cap ETF and Vanguard Small-Cap ETF. In our joint brokerage portfolio we switched out Vanguard Intermediate Term Bond ETF for gold rated Vanguard Municipal Bond Tax Exempt ETF to lower our federal tax exposure. After these adjustments, we are still predominantly Vanguard etf’s in our portfolios but the Morningstar tools were very useful in making the minor adjustments we did and confirming why we are keeping the other Vanguard etf’s we already had. I became a Morningstar subscriber again after the free trial but you can easily just use the one week free trial to review your own portfolio using the helpful Morningstar tools.

I am on mobile sorry and thanks for letting me post here as I have seen a lot help from people being very knowledgeable, I need help on what kind of account to open for my 13 yr old son as x husband and I are running into a situation with his current wife. About 4 yrs ago my son suffered a traumatic and tragic situation at a big box store that is very well known in the US(world wide too) he lost his legs from the knee down and suffered some spinal injuries.Thankfully I had my niece who worked at very well known law firm represent my son, we used my health insurance and my insurance went after big box store.Judge ordered big box store to pay for all his medical expenses until he is fully grown and can receive proper prosthetic legs for his age also medical expenses that were related to these injuries. Now to the financial part,my niece brought in her boss I am guessing the owner of the law firm(not sure how to call them as he is known to go after these big corporations. They had offered 1 million for both the loss of the legs our attorneys said no absolutely not,they pushed for close to $4.7million and it settled. My son already has a college fund thanks to grandparents,my ex husband,current husband and my self so now here comes the ex husbands wife claiming half as she says our son has a father which means half of ex husbands money belongs to her.Thankfully my niece was smart enough to make sure the money is payable to only my son, what kind of account would you all suggest to put his money in? Neither parents or spouses will touch this money as we don’t deserve any of it,sorry for lack of writing I am not good at this,any advice would be appreciated as I want to get this handled because stepmom is taking me to court for it which is whole another story.