Miranda cosgrove feet pictures

Hi Court and others!
I hope this story finds you or at least some people from the sub because I think it's a really important story to hear. Even if it doesn’t get in a video, it definitely takes some weight off my shoulders to talk about it. I tried to keep it short, but with how many important details there are, I couldn’t, so this is a bit of a longer read, I'm sorry, but I hope it’s entertaining nonetheless.
This happened about a month ago. The story involves me, Kaleigh (18f), and my friend (20f). I’ll call her Nicole in this story for privacy reasons. Nicole and I go to the same college and between classes often drive around and get food, classic “boring town in the Midwest” type of “fun”. On this day, we drove past a park we hadn’t seen before with a little bridge and decided to go for a walk. All was well, we took some cute pictures, and as we headed back to the car, I realized the trail also went down to the river. We agreed to go for a short walk along it and take some more pictures.
For reference, to get to this part of the trail, you had to go down a hill, and once at the bottom, you would walk between the water and a steep hill full of trees. As we walked down, we noticed a scruffy bigger man, probably around 50, walking around. As he was near a shed, I presumed he was doing some sort of farm work, which I later found out was not the case. As we kept walking, we came across a few homeless camps in the trees, and as I glanced behind me, I saw that he was laying flat on the ground with his head propped up just watching us walk. This is when it started to get creepy.
I told Nicole we should keep walking and make it over the small hill so he couldn’t see us anymore. We successfully did that, but moments after, I looked behind me again, and he was walking towards us. At this point, I was sufficiently freaked out. Nicole isn’t big on true crime, but I am, and I knew this seemed off even when she said it was fine. We both noticed this, and I told Nicole to stay calm and keep walking at a normal pace. She said we should turn around and go back to the car, to which I said there is no way we are turning around and putting ourselves directly in his path. There was a clearing in the trees coming up, and I told her once we round the corner where he can’t see us, to sprint up the hill. We climbed up the (very steep) hill as quietly as possible and let out a sigh of relief. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the end of it. We were both a little calmer as there was distance between the man and us now. However, as I looked down to see where he was, I realized he was nowhere to be found. Curiosity got the best of me. I walked back and forth a few steps because I couldn’t fathom how he could’ve simply disappeared. At that moment, I heard crunching in the leaves. Nicole was a few feet away from me, and I heard her cough. When I looked up at her, I saw her eyes widen. I turned back and didn't see anything, then I looked down. At my feet, about one foot away from me, the man crawled out of the bushes on all fours. He crawled. Out of the bushes. On. All. Fours. Which means he was crouching in the trees on the side of the hill just listening and waiting.
Nicole was farther away, but I was standing right by him. He started to stand up, and I just about shit my pants. It took everything in me not to scream and sprint away right then and there, but I knew it would be best to stay calm. Nicole said through a fake laugh, “Hey, we should probably get going to class,” and I said, “Yeah!” We started to walk away, and with panic filled, obviously fake laughter, we started skipping. We had just been joking about how skipping is an “effective mode of transportation” earlier, so I guess it’s where our minds went. Then, Nicole looks behind her and back at me and says, “He’s running.” I said, “He’s running???? At us???” to which she subsequently replied, “YES. RUN. NOW” We both sprinted towards my car, which was parked on the other side of a busy street. I have never felt as much panic as I did trying to get my keys out of my pocket without dropping them. I’m not one for running or lots of exercise. It has just been winter, and I spent my days drawing and playing games on my switch, so when I had to break out into a sprint, I had the unfortunate reminder that I have asthma. And no inhaler.
So, as I'm running away from this man, trying to get my keys out, I screech to a halt to avoid being hit by a car and have the realization that hey! I can’t breathe! I only have to make it across the road, so I pushed myself to keep going. But by the time I got to the car, I could barely inhale for more than a second. It was my car, so I got in the driver's seat. We couldn’t get out and switch seats because A) we would have to get out of the locked car and B) I was getting way too lightheaded to even walk. I could barely form a sentence, and Nicole is freaking out trying to find an inhaler (which I did not have). While I'm still trying to remember how to breathe, Nicole tells me she can’t see where he went. Last time he disappeared it didn’t go well, so this seemed like it was gonna go badly. However, there was now a minivan parked in the lot with us, which gave an extra bit of comfort. Then, we see the guy emerge from the bushes and slide what appeared to be a knife into his pocket. I presume he had gone down to one of the makeshift tents to grab it as he had climbed back up the hill.
Nicole said, “What was he carrying when he was chasing us? He’s still holding it.” We then both realized simultaneously that it was a frying pan. He chased us. With. A frying pan. And now had a knife! Perfect! He wandered back and forth across the road from us trying to “act natural” (that’s the best way I can explain it) and then started acting the opposite of natural and started digging a hole in the ground. The minivan behind us pulls out of the parking lot, and we’re alone again. As soon as it’s out of sight, the man books it straight at my car, frying pan in hand. I still can’t breathe, but I have forensic science next period, and I know damn well I'm not about to be the next unit. I’m not dying today.
I put the car in drive and floor it. If I have to hit a bitch, I will. At this point, I have so much fear and anger and terror in me that I kinda wished he would’ve just jumped in front of the car so I could’ve hit him. As I sped away, he kept running after the car (as if he could catch up with it, my gorgeous 2004 Ford Fusion named Jessica will always win). We speed back to campus and run to my class so we can tell my teacher, who is, of course, terrified and tells us to report it to the cops.
This part's probably gonna make you mad. We call the non-emergency line as this happened about 45 minutes ago now. I tell the whole story to the operator. I know the name of the park, I know and have pictures of the exact part of the trail we were on, I have a full description of the man, and given that he likely lives there, he’s probably still there and is definitely dangerous. There is no way that was a misunderstanding or he had good intentions.
I was happy that the operator was a woman as I thought maybe she would be more sympathetic. That happiness went away about as fast as I did when I drove off. She told me I should have reported it sooner and that there was nothing she could do, saying, “I don’t know what you want me to do about that, I can’t just take that information down.” Which, yes she can. I asked my brother-in-law who works on the police force, and he confirmed that. She absolutely could have done something.
I was fed up and tired and scared, so after a few pleas with her to take it seriously, I said, “Thank you so much for your sympathy, it really means a lot.” in the most sarcastic tone I could and hung up. I wish I would’ve gone to the station and reported it and told someone that that is how their calls are being treated and that it was unacceptable, but I just got busy and didn’t get the chance.
So to anyone who has experienced anything like this, I am so sorry. Always stand your ground, you deserve to be taken seriously!!! I'm sorry that that was long, and hopefully, it wasn’t too confusing. Thank you to anyone who took the time to read this, I love you all <3
TLDR: Homeless man stalked my friend and I before proceeding to chase us with a frying pan.

Man, I am pumped to tell you chronically online content addicts my story. Wait is that too mean of an intro? Will this get taken down for harassment since I painted too accurate a picture of the people on this site? Sorry, everyone, I’m sure you all smell like an expensive bakery and have touched grass this morning. Anyway, I promise I have something interesting. It even involves the dark web you uncreative writers cream yourselves over! I mean, totally real people speaking about their strangely similar experiences. Okay, fine I’ll stop bullying you through the screen before you click off.
This all started when I was seven years old and my parents were killed in front of me in an anti-indigenous hate crime, but let's be real you don’t care. I’m just some annoying Cherokee kid with dead parents so I’ll skip to the good parts. I spent years in an orphanage, gradually becoming more interested in death and violence. As bad as it is, I went out of my way to expose myself to that content in the hopes of desensitizing myself. Which ended up working too well, since now I’m obsessed with causing and viewing pain, though I don’t find any joy in hurting myself.
I got adopted at twelve and after a few months of staying at my new family’s home on the reservation, I went with them to a state sweatier than the average Reddit user, California. Long story short, both of my caretakers, whom I referred to as Uncle and Auntie because they could never be my parents, died. Leaving me in the care of their older son, who I call cousin. I’m not stupid enough to give up any real names, so I’ll call him Brick, cause he’s as dumb as one. He was in his early 20s when he was tasked with taking care of me and is the world’s worst excuse for a babysitter.
I’m almost always alone at the apartment, with him only coming by to drop off supplies and stay for a few hours so the neighbors don’t get too worried. Unless I get in trouble at school, then he’d suddenly give a shit. It's useful because he doesn't about the gory stuff I look at, but some display of interest would be nice. Oh well, ninety percent of the population sucks so he’s just part of the majority. Now, with that said, you’ll be able to understand the perfect storm that led me here. During my time on the deep web, I found a particular website that caught my eye. They had new footage relatively consistently and they were the easiest for me to access since I didn't go too far into the dark web, especially with all the honey pots lying around.
I even bought a couple of files for myself to study and admire. One thing irritated me though, the cameraman. He was always sobbing, breathing, shaking, or some combination of those. It seriously killed the vibe of the killings. Something I commented on under many videos, often saying I would do a better job filming. A choice that in hindsight was me asking to end up in one of those recordings. I didn't think anything of it at the time. I was mostly the only one who commented but I was sure they wouldn't care. I was embarrassingly wrong.
I was staying up like usual, but it was past one AM on a school night, and back then that was a lot so I tried to sleep. Closing my eyes, tossing and turning, the works. I had just started drifting off when I heard the front door open. I remained calm but immediately found it weird since Brick never showed up this late. The thuds of the individual's feet grew louder as they got closer to my bedroom. I tried to convince myself it wasn't a stranger, especially since they got in with ease, but I knew that was wishful thinking.
They hummed as they opened my door. My dumbass had left it unlocked. I remained on my side, trying to look like I was asleep. They turned on the flashlight of their phone, shining it in my face. It was hard but I stayed still while they traced it over my features. I could tell they were smiling as they clicked their tongue.
“Heh, I knew it was a brat,” they whispered to themselves, pulling tangles out of my hair. Something I struggled not to groan from. They pulled up the hair over my ear and got so close spit got on my ear lobe.
“I know you’re awake kid,” they murmured, putting a blade to my neck. I let them grab my shoulder and move me onto my back, I knew how to fight but I wasn't about to take that big a risk with the position they had me in.
“You think you’re so cool saying you can do better than our guy.” they snickered, kneeling, their flashlight still shining in my face.
“Do you seriously believe that?” they questioned, moving the light away.
“Yeah, I do.” I stood my ground, they might have been intimidating but I wasn't gonna let that stop me from being honest.
“I wouldn't sound like I’m gonna piss myself every time it gets gory. I’m confident I could get better footage too, getting up close is something I’ve fantasized about.”
They clicked their tongue again and ran their finger over the bridge of my nose.
”Well, I know you’re a big fan of what we do, and you’re confidence makes me think you got something to back those claims up, so how’d you like a deal?”
I was surprised by how civil they were being aside from the touching and weapon against my throat.
“What kind of deal?” I asked, for all I knew this guy wanted me to lick their feet or some weird shit like that. They placed a finger underneath my eye, tracing a half moon with their nail.
“You have till this Friday to film a video of you killing an animal and put it on a flash drive that I’ll pick up here. If it impresses me and the crew we’ll hire ya with a handsome salary.” They began, moving their hand down to my cheek.
“But if you don't show, or it doesn't meet our standards, then I’m fucking up one of the parts of your face.” They warned, pinching my skin harshly.
“And if I say no to this deal?”
They put their hand over my mouth, scratching my lips.
“That’s cute, if you say no I’ll just slit your throat.” they grinned.
“Or rip it open with my teeth if you got a preference,” they smirked, before running their tongue across their sharp teeth.
“Okay, since I have no choice I’ll go with it, but I’m telling you now I can give you something way better than what you likely expect of me.” I prefaced, looking into their sunken eyes. They scratched my scalp, including the side of my head that was shaved.
“Good choice, I’ll be back to pick it up and if you're not here I’ll assume you don’t have the video. I genuinely wish you luck, because you’ll need it.” they removed the blade from my neck and walked away. I sat still for a few minutes in the dark, processing what had happened and wondering how they got into my apartment with such ease. I was confident I could blow their sniveling excuse of a cameraman out of the water, but I was worried about the people I was getting caught up with.
Sure, I had been on a lot of gore sites over the years but I was always just watching and occasionally commenting. Compared to most in the scene I wasn't much of a threat. I could defend myself and have contemplated killing for years but I hadn't murdered anyone or worse. Plus, I am part of way too many targeted groups to not be constantly at risk. Teenage, fem-leaning, two-spirit, indigenous kid with trauma? Yeah, I might as well be walking sign screaming “Hate crime me”.
So yeah, there was a lot to worry about. Regardless, I couldn't let that fear hold me back. I had a job to do and a group of sickos to appease. The next morning was rough, I got no sleep cause I’d spent all night brainstorming. I barely mustered the energy to change and drank straight mouthwash instead of brushing my teeth. Slogging onto the bus with drool on my cheek, I went to the back like usual. No one sat there cause, the seats were extra worn down, and I scared off anyone who attempted to with my active, rabies-infected bitch face. That day was different though.
I blanked on his name and where I knew him from, but I recognized his wavy hair and prominent curved nose. He glanced at each seat on the bus, before somehow settling on my area. He tried to give me space but ultimately seated himself beside me after realizing it was the only spot that didn't look like it would give him cancer. I glared at him as I did with everyone, but it didn't phase him.
“You know you could pick anywhere else right?” I murmured. He stared at the floor, then at me.
“I’m aware, but a few months ago I started a mission to sit on every part of this bus, and this is the last place.” he smiled, his lips softly curving at the sides.
“What’s the point of that?”
His mouth moved into a more neutral position, but his eyes kept smiling.
“I just thought it would be neat to see the same place from a bunch of different perspectives.” he took out his phone and snapped a photo from the point of view where he was sitting. Maybe my sleepiness made my bitch face less effective, cause he hadn't shown a hint of fear, which kind of annoyed me.
“That’s cool I guess, but I wouldn't do that if I were you. I’ve done some back here alone that would make your skin crawl.” in hindsight my attempt at unnerving him just made me sound like a pervert, which is probably why he held back laughter. Trying to hide a chuckle by clearing his throat.
“Hey, it's not my business what you do, no matter how Haram it is. It’s your life so that’s between you and whatever you believe in. Just don’t shake hands with me.” he joked, playfully putting his hands up. Strangely, I remembered his name at that moment.
“Oh shit, you’re Abdul! We have art together.” I sat up, haphazardly slamming my hand down on my leg.
“Uh yeah, I’ve seen some of your paintings, they’re pretty cool. I like the way you texture them, I’m trying to work on that.” he complimented, seeming more weirded out by my sudden energy than my accidental insinuation. I felt a little stupid for yelling his name but decided not to dwell on it.
“Thanks, you’re stuff is nice, and you’re good at shading.”
He stretched his arms while thanking me. We talked for a few more minutes, taking jabs at each other throughout. Turns out he was better at being an asshole than his artsy charismatic appearance made me think. The thing setting our insults apart being that you could tell he was a loving person underneath. It was the nicest conversation I had with anyone in a while. Though he could tell I was tired so he quieted down, letting me sleep, waking me when we got to school. We went our separate ways until the last two periods we shared. All that time, I spent my remaining energy plotting how I was going to handle the video. What I’d kill, record with, and how to dispose of the evidence. It was a lot to consider, but through three classes I devised a plan.
I’d find a stray around my apartment complex and take it out in my room. Record it on a portable camera since I broke the ones on my phone, no, I will not be answering how that happened. Then once I had my footage I’d put the body in a trash bag, throw it in the complex’s garbage, and clean the blood off my floor. It didn't seem like Brick would come by so he wasn't a factor I thought I’d have to consider. The plan was almost too easy, but I decided to believe in Occam’s razor. I got so lost in thought that by the time I reached Art, which was my second-to-last period, I didn't process that we were moving seats.
“She called your name,” Abdul reminded me. Our teacher placed us next to each other at our four-person table. The two girls sitting with us were already friends, so I didn't bother to say anything, but I was interested in talking to him more.
“So, what do you think of this assignment?” He shrugged, taking out his sketchbook.
“I’m not that good at drawing people, but the idea of combining two people’s faces into a portrait seems interesting. Any ideas on who you’ll pick?”
“Probably the members of the music duo Brain Tumor, they’re my favorite artists and they both look weird as hell.”
“Wow way to talk about your favorites, if that’s what you say about them I can‘t imagine what you have to say about me.” he joked, pulling up reference pictures.
“First, it’s not an insult, second I don’t have anything to say about you. Brain and Tumor have features and styles that make them stand out. Sure they’re ugly, but it just adds to their visual charm. Hot people are boring, there’s nothing to pick at.” I explained, unzipping my bag.
“Oh, so you’re saying you think I’m hot.”
His comment wasn’t serious but it kind of got to me.
“Shit, that’s not what I meant, I was trying to say you’re boring. All hot people are boring, but not all boring people are hot, okay?” I explained, flipping to a clean page.
“Alright, but if I’m so bland then why talk to me?”
I hesitated, contemplating how much of a dick I was gonna be.
“Because it means you probably need some spice in your life, which I can provide.”
He began sketching a head on his paper.
“I like spices, but I feel like you’re the kind of person to dump a cabinet’s worth onto me.”
I flicked my pencil over to his side of the desk, putting on a mocking grin.
“Aww, you scared I’m gonna get you into trouble?”
He picked up the pencil and started using it, putting his on my side.
“No, ‘cause I’m good at setting boundaries. I’m more concerned that you’ll get annoyed with how unafraid of you I am.”
I stared at him for a moment, I hadn't expected to hear that.
“Jeez, man you didn't have to read me like that.”
He shrugged, observing the red paint from past projects that lay on my pencil.
“It's not hard to figure out, just this morning you were trying to push me away on the bus. Lucky, or unlucky, for you I want you to have a friend and you seem like a fun person.”
“Wait are you saying I have no friends?” I squinted at him.
“Well, do you?”
I didn't answer.
“If your response is silence I suggest you take up my offer.”
I was stunned, to be honest. No one had offered to be my friend since 6th grade, and that didn't last long. Of course, I accepted it, but for the rest of the period, there was an awkwardness in my mind. As pathetic as it sounds I wasn't used to others genuinely enjoying my company like he did. Which was partly by design cause I get joy out of scaring people away, but still. I forgot how it felt to have conversations about normal things like art. He had such a nice smile too, usually when I see a grin I want to slap it off, but I liked his. His voice was also nice, it’s hard to describe what in particular but it was easy on the ears.
Okay, I’m starting to get off-topic. I’ll skip to the important part. Toward the end of class, he started talking about how he was interested in filmmaking and got a portable video camera as a gift at last year’s Eid. He didn't have it on him, but he showed me a picture.
“Heh, that’s funny, I bought the same one a month ago.” I pointed out.
“Yeah, it's a popular model, I’m still getting the hang of it though cause I’m so used to using my phone.”
“Well, maybe I could bring you over to my place or vice versa after school and I can help you out.” I suggested.
He smiled, putting his phone back in his pocket.
“I thought you said you’ve only had it for a month? You know I can always look up tutorials from trained professionals.” he reminded me with a notable smugness that I'd used with him before.
“Well those guys are stuffy and I’m a fast learner.”
He redirected his attention back to his page, picking his pencil up.
“Alright, I suggest we go somewhere public instead. You’re not exactly the kind of person I want to bring home to my parents right away. Plus they always need to meet my friends and their guardians before I hang out at their home.”
I gave an exaggerated sigh, stretching my back.
“Aw man, looks like we can’t get high in my murder pit during our first hangout.”
He didn't respond for a solid few seconds.
“Wait, you do know I'm joking right?”
He shrugged, the smile in his eyes appearing again.
“I mean, one of those things is a little less believable than the other.” he snickered, and I laughed with him.
We set up a time and a date, which is where I screwed myself. He ended up being busy with projects from his other classes and family which just left us with Friday, the same day I had to submit the video. Now, did I tell him I wouldn't be able to make it? No, of course not, because I decided to be stupid and even more overconfident. I said that I’d one hundred percent be able to hang out with him after school like I didn't have a mutilator who was going to drop by my place at an unknown time.
The rest of the day went over fine but that bad timing led me to feel like a dick later. When I got home I was able to write out my plan, even sketching a few specifics of what I’d do. It was more exciting than when I’d been brainstorming, but this is when the gravity of the situation began to set in. When I said I’d fantasized about killings I meant it. I mean my teddy with twenty-five stab wounds should say enough. Regardless this would be the first time real blood was on my hands.
It made me feel powerful, but a little afraid. I’ve heard stories of people thinking that it would be an awesome experience and then feeling like shit. I doubted I’d be one of those people but still. Plus, I didn't exactly trust the guy who gave me this job. There was a good chance that this whole situation was rigged and they’d kill me no matter how good the video was. Or worse turn me into the feds and expose my collection. Honestly, if that happened I’d probably eat a shot to avoid going to jail. Wait, can I say that on this platform? Okay to the mods, that was a joke, I want to live a long life. Ugh, I’m doing a terrible job of staying on track. The point is there was a lot up in the air despite it being a matter of life or death.
I knew I’d go through with it but it was still a lot less straightforward than it initially seemed. I wracked my brain to remember where most of the cats stayed and tried to come up with a good way to lure one without raising suspicion. This also proved harder than first thought because I didn't think to account for the cat man, an old guy who lived alone and fed all the cats in our dingy complex while also housing a few. Knowing how obsessive he was he’d probably notice if one of them disappeared. Then again not all the cats return consistently or at all. It makes more sense that he’d think one of them was run over rather than slaughtered. It was getting late again so I rested my head for a moment, a bad move cause I ended up falling asleep at my desk. Not even changing out of the clothes I’d worn before, I woke up late and barely caught the bus the next morning.
I went to my usual spot but Abdul had already taken it. He patted the area next to it, which he’d covered in a towel, a smart move knowing how nasty it was. People gave me a few dirty looks as normal, which I smiled at. I stretched, my mind slightly less out of it than the previous morning.
“Uh, you do realize that-”
“Yeah, I know I’m wearing the same clothes.”
Abdul looked me up and down, his eyes remaining soft, but with a mix of concern and judgment. He set his backpack down and took off his sweater handing it to me.
“Dude what are you-”
“Look I don't know what led to you not being able to change but I think you should at least have a fresh top.”
I was surprised he was offering me something to wear but I took it.
“Uh, thanks, I’ll change into it later.”
He nodded as I put it in my backpack.
“You know you didn't have to do that.” I reminded him.
“Well there’s a lot of stuff I don’t have to do, but I do it because I want to, and I wanted to help you out.”
He smiled, his face still warmer than an Arizona summer. I got a strange feeling in my chest at that moment, I still can’t tell if it was good or bad.
“Well, thanks, I'll give it back to you tomorrow.”
We talked a little more and he mentioned something that caught my attention.
“Have you heard about all the animals that have been turning up dead?”
My eyes widened with surprise.
“No, I haven't, when did you hear about that?”
He pulled on his long-sleeve shirt.
“My sister said her friend who works at a shelter noticed a bunch of animals were getting adopted by people around the same time, and since then gore videos with them have been showing up. She found out through her co-worker who was emailed it by some random creep.”
I covered my mouth and looked away to hide the smile growing on my face. He had just given me the perfect cover-up without knowing. Now if I killed an animal people had an entire violent ring to connect it to instead of me! I stayed quiet for a minute because I could tell he’d likely see through any phony sad sounds I made.
“Oh wow, that’s awful, do you think they’ll ever find out the people behind it?”
He sighed, running his hand through his wavy hair.
“I hope so, for now, all we can do is pray that no more animals get hurt.”
I couldn't contain my grin as he said that so sincerely like animals and people didn't die constantly and that taking down one group would somehow stop the issue.
“Is there some joke I don’t get?” he furrowed his brow.
“Uh, no, sorry I smile when nervous.”
His gaze softened again, and he didn't press further.
His bringing up the animal killings ended up being the exact push I needed to get my hands dirty. I’d spent the entire day before planning so it was time to put that plan into action. I stole some cat treats that the cat man had laid out and spread them around my apartment which was on the bottom floor. Waiting for one of them to take the bate outside my window was pretty boring but one of them came after a few minutes. A scraggly brown and black cat with a tuft of fur missing on one side of his head. It's messed up but I felt like a little less of an asshole for taking him in since he looked like he was already struggling. I scooped him up and he didn't attempt to fight back.
“Hey there buddy” I waved, feeding him some more food. His eyes had a lot of crust on them, it was kinda gross but I don’t have the right to say with how often I wash my jeans. After a minute or two he let me pet him. I knew making any kind of attachment was bad but I thought it was the right thing to do so he’d fall into a sense of security. I was just about to take him into my room when the door opened.
“Hey, I’m back with groceries!” my shithead cousin announced with two plastic bags in his hands. He looked down to see me with the cat, his eyebrows raising.
“Aw come on, you know we can’t afford a pet.”
He groaned placing the bags on a table and unloading them.
“I know, but he doesn't look like he’s got a lot of life in him I at least want to help him feel better before he kicks the bucket!”
Brick rolled his eyes, putting the cereal box on top of the fridge
“Jeez, did you even think about what diseases he might have? His eyes look puffy what if he has something that can get you sick?”
He had valid concerns which was surprising since he’s usually stupid, but I was still annoyed with him.
“I’m sure he’s fine, I’ll even try to wash him, just please let me hold onto him for a little.”
He folded his arms looking down at us.
“Have you even named him?”
I froze for a second, before using the first thing that came to mind, which ended up being pretty awful knowing my plans.
“Cash cow.” I blurted, awkwardly patting his head.
“Honestly that’s better than what I was expecting. I was sure you’d pick ‘Hellspawn Mcgee’ or something else corny.”
He meant to make fun of me but honestly, I would have named him that if I had more time.
“Ugh, anyway I got those dumb chips you like.”
He then pulled out a bag of the wrong chips.
“Dude those are the wrong ones, this is the third time you’ve mixed up the flavors.”
He threw them at me, scaring the cat slightly.
“Well, I pay for it so you shouldn't be so picky. Anyway, while I was in line I picked up something you might be into.”
He then tossed me a trashy teen magazine. One of my least favorite sorry excuses for an influencer on the cover.
“This is a joke, right?”
I couldn't believe my own adopted brother gave such little shit in my interests.
“I don't know, you decided to start being a girl for real this time so I thought the makeup tips on page ten would help you out.”
I scrunched my face at his comment.
“Dude I’ve been this way for years, just because I started wearing more makeup and dresses doesn't mean I’m more of a girl than when I didn't. I know you won’t get the two-spirit thing but come on.”
He shrugged, seeing me done with me even though he’d just shown up.
“Yeah well hey I’m trying. Anyway, just so you know a friend of mine is coming here Friday.”
My heart stopped.
“Wait why here? You live elsewhere why can’t you assholes go there or their place!”
He slammed his fist on the table.
“Will you shut the fuck up!”
He screamed with a phrase I’d grown numb to.
“I don't know, to be honest, something about wanting to move into this complex and this being a way to scout it out. I’m just letting you know now so you don’t act like a complete freak.”
“Jokes on you I’ll piss in whatever shitty beer you bring just cause you said that!”
I yelled back raising my voice higher than his. He face-palmed before putting the plastic bags in the drawer under the sink.
“Whatever, you and your ketamine-addict-looking cat have fun,” he told me while seating himself on the couch. I picked up the cat and walked into the bathroom to clean it. I closed the door and placed him in the dry tub. Using a small disposable mouthwash cup I got a little bit of water. I hadn't had a pet before so I wasn't sure how to approach the task. I dipped my fingers in the water and carefully pet it while pouring s small bit down his back. Any other cat would fight back but he just made pissed-off noises without doing anything.
I scrapped my old shampoo bottle and kneaded it into his thin fur. His skin was bumpy and dry beneath the hair so scrubbing it was uncomfortable. I made sure to avoid getting soap in its eyes but I did pull away some of the crust on its lids. His pupils were so clouded I was surprised that he could see at all, making me feel even more sure that he would be on its way out with or without me.
After drying him I set him on a beat-up shirt I wore when modifying clothes. He sunk his claws into it a few times, playing with a loose string. I ignored him for the rest of the night, hopping into the shower and changing for bed. His meows woke me up a few times but I tuned it out after a while, reminding myself that he wouldn’t be my cat for long.
The next day was Thursday and there wasn't a second that passed by where the weight of the murder I’d have to commit didn't weigh on me. I seriously shot myself in the foot by taking care of that scruffy, pubic hair pile. I was supposed to be hyped about killing it, after all, I’d dreamed and seen way worse than what I was going to do. Yet once I got home and started setting up I felt grosser with each step. I decided to record it in my bathroom instead of my bedroom so it would be harder to connect to me. I set down a few fabric scraps and a worn-out beach towel, placing it all inside a tub for easier cleanup later.
“Okay, I guess it's time,” I mumbled to myself. I brought the cat in and placed it down, setting up my camera once it was comfortable. I also wore my most generic clothes in addition to a mask, putting my hair in a bun for sanitation. When I saw the flicker of red showing that the camera was on I felt I was dreaming. I smiled, excited that I’d get to live out my violent desires. Yet, when I looked down at its pathetic frame and confused expression those urges left me.
I rationalized what I was doing, reminding myself how many animals die all the time and that I’d been forced into this, but it didn't help much in the end. I won’t get into it but under the pressure of impressing the group Cash Cow didn't go out as fast as I would have liked for a first task. Getting rid of the evidence was especially rough, the textures were pretty nasty, to put it mildly. It was surreal watching the blood go down the tub drain and gradually drip off my hands as I rinsed them. I couldn't conjure a single thought the entire time I cleaned it up.
Whether I was wringing out the clothes or putting the remains in plastic bags, it didn't matter. All I could focus on was the task at hand, with hints of disgust along the way. I ended up finishing at three AM. My hands were wrinkled and shook once I settled. I won’t deny that during the murder I didn't hate it. Slashing into something was fun and it made me feel strong. Still, it wasn't nearly as fulfilling as I expected it to be. Part of it was guilt, but it was mostly disappointment. I’d built it up for years and it wasn't earth shatteringly good or bad.
Overall, I expected to feel more, but it just left me hollow with an uncomfortable itch. There was no way I’d ever be able to see the tub the same way, hell I don’t think I’ll ever use it again. Luckily I almost always shower anyway so it's not too big of a deal. I watched a few horror game videos, trashed everything, changed and went to bed.
My scalp hurt like a bitch the morning since I kept my hair in that stupid bun. Despite getting less sleep than the past two days I held myself together a bit better in the morning. I brushed my teeth, changed, and had some fried bread before getting on the bus. Regardless I looked like complete shit and struggled to slump into my seat.
“Rough night?” Abdul asked
“Uh, yeah.” I quietly responded looking to the floor.
He frowned, looking at me with concern.
“You can talk about it if you're comfortable,” he assured me. I contemplated giving him a thinly veiled metaphor or vague explanation so he'd comfort me but stopped myself before my mouth could run a muck. He wouldn't be able to do much of anything and I don’t like opening up.
“Uhm, thanks but it's something I have to deal with alone.”
He nodded, respecting my boundaries.
“You know, I understand if you can’t hang out today it seems like you have a lot going on.”
I avoided eye contact with him as he spoke. For once I was feeling hints of guilt toward a person. I wanted to spend time with him, but I knew that I wasn't in the state to do that.
“Yeah, I think it’ll have to wait, I’m-” I cut myself off before apologizing. A fact about me that should surprise no one is that I hate apologizing. Even when I do feel kinda bad the act fills me with embarrassment.
“You what?” he asked, his eyes telling me that he knew what I was going to say.
“I’m emotionally not great.” I spat out in an admittedly poor attempt to get out of saying sorry. As always he remained calm but I could tell he saw through me.
“Okay, like I said I understand, whatever it is I hope you feel better.”
I told him thank you and we didn't speak for the rest of the day. At home I changed into more comfortable clothes and brushed my teeth. Unfortunately, I wasn't bouncing back from killing nearly as much as I expected.
“It wasn't even that bad! That thing was on its last legs anyway.” I grumbled to myself, smacking my forehead. I was feeling worse than when I did it which is weird. I ended up spontaneously decorating a ratty tie from the bottom of an accessory drawer to distract myself. It helped me get my mind off things, for a little. I had zero plan, just wanting to make something needlessly complex. Hours that felt like minutes passed and soon it was covered in patches, frills, and beads. I just tried it on when I heard the front door open.
“Man, that shit was wild!” I heard Brick laugh groggily. I didn't have to see or smell him to know he’d gotten lit. I rolled my eyes, closing my bedroom door.
“Hey, who’s there?” his friend asked, seemingly referring to me.
“Oh, that’s my little sis, don’t mind her she’s just on her emo shit!” he joked, which pissed me off for the petty reason that I didn't even listen or dress emo.
“Hey, that’s alright with me, I went through one of those phases,” they responded, their words less slurred than my cousin’s.
I fucked up and forgot to lock it when I closed it so they were able to swing it open, almost smacking my desk.
“Hey emo girl!” they waved as Brick haphazardly pulled them back.
“Okay, man, seriously I think she wants to be left alone.”
The way his friend looked at me made me uncomfortable. Like they’d snap my neck if I pissed them off. They clicked their tongue while stepping through the door frame.
“Alright, but I gotta say calling her an emo is inaccurate, they look like they watch gore and most emos just say they do.” they flashed a sharp toothy grin. At that moment I began to connect the dots.
“Easy, she’ll get pissy with you dude, now come on.” Brick warned tugging their opened button pushed him away. They looked me dead in the eyes.
“I don’t think she minds, in truth, I feel like we’ll have a lot to discuss later.” they smiled again, finally walking back into the living room. A chill ran up my spine when I saw them. The sharp teeth, New York accent, unsettling gaze, that motherfucker was the person who recruited me! They were able to get into my place so easily cause my dumbass cousin probably gave them a spare key or the opportunity to make one, and when they were a room away from me!
I dug my hands into my pillow as I contemplated what to do, no matter what happened next, I knew it was gonna be a rough visit.

Hey guys
This week I got bursitis in my knee (twin pregnancy related knee injury, don’t ask) and I have to lay in bed to rest it and I’m BORED AS HELL. But I thought, well I can’t move anywhere or do anything but my mind is alive! So I decided to do a lyric analysis of the songs on Midnights in light of all the understanding and perspective we gained from TTPD (and guys, let’s get on board with this because yesterday (or was it today)Taylor liked a post someone made linking the two albums together…c’mon ya’ll mother wants us to find the clues, let’s have some harmless fun) and don’t worry if you disagree! I know many people will hate my hot takes! Love you guys ♥️
So without further ado, here is the first one, it took me longer than I thought it would 😆
High Infidelity
So I feel like this is about Joe and Matty. This is the scene of the movie where Joe finds out about her illicit affair with Matty
It starts out Taylor thought her and Joe were pretty much over
Lock broken, slur spoken Wound open, game token I didn't know you were keeping count Rain soaking, blind hoping You said I was freeloading I didn't know you were keeping count
The line here about the lock that is broken paints a picture of her unhappy relationship with Joe. She talks about locks again in So Long London “I stopped trying to make him laugh, stopped trying to drill the safe” And here we have a line about a broken lock. There’s always towers and locks and jail metaphors with Jo. She can’t get through to him, he doesn’t understand her. She has tried, over and over again but the lock is well and truly broken. Therefore is a breakdown in their communication and subsequent relationship.
“Slur spoken” speaks to me of Joe somehow finding out that she was with Matty on April 29th and then maybe calling her an unsavory curse word? And obviously it follows that if he has ever had this experience in the past, which the next words seem to suggest, that the old wound of someone cheating on him would be then open - “wound open”
With the words “game token,” “I didn’t know you were keeping count,” and “you said I was freeloading”, (taking something from someone but giving nothing in exchange) I think here she is comparing their unhappy, distant and cold relationship to a game that has run its course, that she thought was basically over. She is basically saying “I didn’t think you would mind if I was with him on April 29th, I thought you never noticed anything I did, much less cared. And I know you have been with her too (not sure whether Joe actually cheated or whether he just emotionally did, but Taylor alludes to both at different points of TTPD - “he was with her in dreams” “my husbands cheating, I want to kill him”) so Taylor is saying I didn’t know we were keeping count of this infidelity situation we BOTH have going on. Might be a stretch but she seems have the vibe of I didn’t know it was ok for you and not for me, I didn’t think you cared anymore, I didn’t think you were keeping count. I didn’t think you even noticed me.
Then she says she is “rain soaked,” which connotes a sense of dampness, discomfort, and gloominess. “Blind hoping” - the relationship is running on blind hope, basically fumes at this point. Blind hope means that you have hope, but there is absolutely nothing to base that hope on - in fact, you may even have evidence that the situation is hopeless, but you're hoping for a positive outcome anyway.
High infidelity Put on your records and regret me I bent the truth too far tonight I was dancing around, dancing around it High infidelity Put on your headphones and burn my city Your picket fence is sharp as knives I was dancing around, dancing around it
She has been unfaithful to Joe I think in some shape of form (I’m sorry I never wanted to admit it! But I think maybe here she is admitting it to us?!) The words high infidelity seem to describe a situation where she has broken Joe’s trust and there is a sense of betrayal. In the next line that says I bent the truth too far tonight, I was dancing around it, this suggests deception or dishonesty, where the truth has been distorted or manipulated.
The imagery of "Put on your records and regret me" and "Put on your headphones and burn my city" could be interpreted as the aftermath of the relationship gone wrong, where Taylor feels regret and Jo feels a sense of destruction or hurt. She’s sad and he’s mad. (He’s also ignoring her. Again. Turning on loud music and drowning her out. Not trying to unpack why she did what she did and move towards her (which sure is hard when you just find out) but still. I don’t get the feeling he would have tried to sort it through even after time had passed and he’d had time to process. This type of ignoring incommunicative behavior feels like a constant state for Joe. Anyway)
Your picket fence is sharp as knives
This is such a good line. Such a strong image. Taylor was writing novels I tell you. I feel like the image of a picket fence is typically associated with the idea of a peaceful, idyllic suburban life, symbolizing stability, security, the American Dream, and then the phrase "sharp as knives" subverts this usual imagery. It suggests that what may seem safe and comforting and like Mr Perfect on the surface (Jo) can actually be quite dangerous or harmful underneath. Appearances are deceiving, and there are hidden challenges and difficulties that can exist even in seemingly perfect relationships. In short, Jo is toxic at this point. She is in a toxic relationship.
Then she asks
Do you really want to know where I was April 29th? Do I really have to chart the constellations in his eyes?
THIS “chart the constellations in his eyes” part is how I know it’s Matty she’s talking about. Literally Matty is from outer space. That is his metaphor, his calling card. Trace him through her songs. If she mentions anything to do with space, I truly believe chances are it’s about one Matty Healy. He flies through the air because he is Peter Pan. Pretty much every time she talks about him there are overt mentions of the sky or stars or galaxies or constellations or meteors or some such. It’s all over TTPD like a rash. This is surely lore by now.
She is basically saying, Joe, have you not realised that our relationship is nearly dead? You ignore me, you treat me like an old cardigan under your bed, I didn’t even think you cared or would notice TBH, you don’t understand me, we are so estranged from each other at this point, are you really so surprised that this happened? Do you really not understand that I might have been drawn to this starry eyed man who actually wants me around? Do I actually have to explain his appeal? Do you really want to know all the details? Spare yourself please. How could you not see this coming?
Reminds me of You’re losing me lyric,
“How can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dyin'? I sent you signals and bit my nails down to the quick My face was gray, but you wouldn't admit that we were sick”
Back to high infidelity lyrics again:
Storm coming, good husband Bad omen Dragged my feet right down the aisle At the house lonely, good money I'd pay if you'd just know me Seemed like the right thing at the time
The mention of a storm coming and the juxtaposition with "good husband" suggests that despite the positive aspects of Joe, there's a sense of impending trouble or difficulty (bad omen - signifying something ominous or foreboding.) The line "seemed like the right thing at the time" implies a sense of hindsight or regret, as if the decision she made in the past to drag her feet down the aisle (shack up with Jo for 6 years) wasn't as positive as it seemed initially.
She seems to have conflicting emotions here, there's both a recognition of something good ("good husband") and a sense of warning or concern ("bad omen") about how things have turned out.
This next part is SO THEIR RELATIONSHIP - she is basically saying she is trapped in the house (we know Jo hated being out in public with Taylor) she’s lonely as hell, and despite all his flaws she would actually pay good money if he would actually just try to truly know her!! Pull his finger out and put some effort it!! After all, she’s just a “pathological people pleaser, who only wanted you to see her” (you’re losing me - the parallels between both these songs are so clear to me now)
And then this part really kills me
You know there's many different ways that you can kill the one you love The slowest way is never loving them enough
This is literally the way Joe killed their relationship. He lost her, because he never really committed and chose her, he TOLERATED her (that song is about him too!! Yes it’s a composite sketch but boy has she lived that “tolerate it” life, no one can write about it like that unless they’ve seen it from the inside) he didn’t love her enough. And so he killed her. He killed the relationship and it also kind of killed her a little bit inside in the process. GAH it’s too freaking sad!!!
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
But the writing. Bellissimo!!!!! Taylor you are a genius.
Anyway don’t come for me. And TBH I don’t care if you do. I’m having too much fun I can’t wait for the next one. What do you guys think?!!

Album link: https://imgur.com/a/668Rteb
My latest order from Justin just arrived so I thought I'd share some pictures and thoughts.
Brand: J. FitzPatrick
Model: Southcenter zip-boot (now RTW, ordered presale), Wedgewood Balmoral boot (RTW), Seattle laceless chukka (GMTO/presale)
Last: MGF (Southcenter and Wedgewood), TMG (Seattle)
Sizing and Fit: I usually wear US 7/7.5. For JFP in particular, I wear size 7 for Oxfords and 7.5 for loafers. The oxfords fit snug and i have to wear thin dress socks. I tried on a 7.5 in store and they were too big. I do have a pair of jodhpurs in 7.5 on the TMG last but they are slightly big with normal socks. Fit great with thicker socks however.
Southcenter and Wedgewood. Ordered a size 7 for both. This is their roomiest last and is closer to an E fit. The socks I'm wearing in the picture are my thinnest dress socks and both pairs fit fine with room to spare. I have also tried slightly thicker socks and the fit is perfect.
Seattle. Went with size 7 for these after emailing Justin instead of sizing up like I did with my loafers. Since the elastic is prone to stretch and the suede is more forgiving, he recommended ordering my normal size. I've been wearing no show ankle socks with these and they fit great. Some slight heel slip due to the low cut ankle though. I think these would have been better with a suede heel counter like his loafers have.
Finishing:
No visible flaws on any of these. The zip boots have pitched heels and beveled waists like his shoes normally do. The zipper is high quality. The Balmoral boot did flake a little with the initial few steps. I took some close up pictures you can see in the album. Not sure if it was excess dye or just dryness. I applied a very small amount of renovateur and then buffed the boots after about an hour. No issues since then. The laceless chukka has unfinished edges but this is part of the aesthetic. The suede is very high quality.
Interestingly the two rubber soled shoes appear to the channeled soles. Not sure how this was accomplished. If anybody knows I would love to find out.
Final thoughts:
Southcenter: Amazing look. High quality zipper. Wore these with a suit to a wedding the other day and they looked great. Not too many brands offer these at this price point and level of quality that I know of (maybe Enzo Bonafe?) So I would definitely recommend them if you're in the market for a zip boot.
Wedgewood: Great balance between casual and dressy with the commando sole. Not super bulky and still comfortable after a long day on my feet at work. Go well with both chinos and denim. Great in the rain. Would highly recommend.
Seattle Laceless Chukka: Extremely comfortable. I don't know what kind of wedge sole these have but it's extremely comfortable. Super easy to slip on and off. A way better deal and much better quality than similar shoes from Loro Piana etc. The style is arguably very polarizing but I love them. I have been wearing them almost everyday for the past week with cuffed selvedge denim as well as slimmer chinos. I really hope he makes these a production model. Would love to grab another pair in another colour.
Bonus picture at the end of all of my JFP shoes.

I'm trying to get back into playing ball after 10+ years, but I'm really having difficulty finding hoop shoes that fit due to my super wide feet. My body type is of the more to love variety, but even in my lighter days I had some really wide feet. I know losing weight would help some. I've watched YouTube videos about wide basketball shoes, but my hobbit feet are special. I got a foot scan done at a FleetFeet and they told me that my foot is an 11 3E, but I should size up to an 11.5 4E or 12 4E so that I have extra room for when my feet expand. All my girth measurements were at/near the top of the chart for every part of my feet. For context, I wear Hoka Bondi 8 in a 12 4E for my walking shoes. For everyday shoes I wear AllBirds in a size 12 cuz they're stretchy.
Historically I've worn New Balance shoes because they come in different widths. The only basketball shoe of mine that I can comfortably shoot around in is a pair of New Balance BB582WT1 in a size 12 4E (see picture below - white shoes above Hoka shoebox). I just got the New Balance Kawhi IV in a 12 2E (they don't come in a 4E) and they're pretty snug. I'm currently waiting on the New Balance CC CG1. I've even tried sizing up even more, but that creates other problems. I own the New Balance Kawhi 2 ("kawhis"), Puma MB.01 ("melos"), and Nike Zion 2's ("zions") in size 13 and they're less snug but leave a lot of excess toe room (see pictures below).
Do you guys have any recommendations for basketball shoes? I really want to get back into hooping. Any help would be much appreciated!

“Fuck, marry, kill— Your mom, your dad, your grandmother?”
“I’m sorry?”
“Fuck, marry, kill,” Larry repeated. “Your mom, your dad, your grandmother. You gotta fuck one, marry one and kill one. Who do you choose? I’m Larry by the way. Nice to meet you.”
Steve wasn’t quite sure how to respond.
“I know what I’d do,” Larry continued. “I’d fuck my grandmother. You wanna know why?”
Steve remained silent.
“I’ll tell you why. Cause’ she’s been dead for ten years. That’s why. Shiiiitt! At least that way, it’s only gonna be weird for one of us. That’s how I figure it. Then I’ll probably kill my mom. We never got along well anyway. Which means I’d marry my dad. Not for sexual reasons or anything. I ain’t gay. It just seems like a savvy financial move on my part. My dad has a nice little nest egg saved up. Plus chicks dig gay dudes. You know how much pussy I’d get if I were gay. Shiiiiitt!”
“I’m Steve,” said Steve.
“Yeah I know, you already said that.”
The two men stared ahead at the large stainless steel doors wondering how much longer they’d be trapped within. They were somewhere between the 4th & 5th floors of the Bennett-Robbins medical building on ninth street. One more floor and Steve would have been at the Urologist’s office. Although, getting stuck in an elevator was just another fulfillment of Murphy’s law. ‘Of course this happened’ he thought to himself. First his fiancé called off their wedding and ran off to Miami with her personal trainer. Then a random Tinder hook-up with a sketchy blonde named Tiffy followed by an inevitable case of Chlamydia and now a urinary tract infection. Steve was not currently enjoying his life. He looked at his watch. They had been stuck for 7 minutes. Somehow it had felt like a lot longer. He wanted to pick up the emergency phone and call again but decided against it as he didn’t want to be bothersome. After all he was sure they were working diligently on the matter.
“Would you french kiss a dude if it meant that afterwards you got to titty-fuck Dolly Parton?” Larry asked casually.
“I’ll call them again and see how it’s going,” Steve said, picking up the phone.
After two rings his call was answered and an impatient sounding woman informed him that they were working on it before abruptly hanging up. Steve lowered his head awkwardly. He should’ve known better. The last thing he wanted was to be an annoyance to the very people he was depending on for help. He placed the phone back on the receiver and turned towards his new colleague.
“What doctor are you here to see?” He asked.
Larry pulled a business card out of his pocket, glanced at it momentarily, and said, “Dr. Sing huh.”
“I think the ‘H’ might be silent,” Steve replied.
“Whatever,” Larry muttered. “Who are you here to see,” he added just making conversation because he couldn’t have cared less.
“Dr. Perkins.” Steve replied.
“Dr. Perkins, which one is that? The old guy?”
“No, younger guy. Pretty tall. Like 6’4”, handsome.”
“Well I wouldn’t know anything about that,” Larry Scoffed.
“Why’s that?”
“Cause’ I don’t look at other dudes that way,” Larry condescendingly answered. “No offense,” he added while displaying jazz hands.
“Is that right?” Said Steve wondering why he even replied. Under normal circumstances Steve would never have engaged in lengthy conversation with a guy like Larry but then again these weren’t normal circumstances. Also, Steve had been having a pretty bad month. His heart was broken. Work had been shittier than usual, his ‘Check Engine’ light came on on the way over, and to top it all off, it burnt when he peed. Plus, it wasn’t like he could go anywhere, so why not engage in a debate with a total fucking moron?
“You’re telling me that you’re incapable of acknowledging that a man is attractive?”
“Of course I am. Shiiiitt! I ain’t gay!”
What does that have to do with anything.”
“Only a gay guy finds another guy attractive,” Larry cried. Then backpedaling, “I mean, I got nothing against you guys. I just don’t swing that way. Know what I mean?”
Steve laughed. “Larry, you can find the beauty in things without a sexual attraction. Take a sunset for example. It’s ok to say that the sunset is beautiful. No one will think you’re trying to bang the sun.”
“You’re right about that. I ain’t touching nobody’s son. Shiiiitt! But I’ll holler at their daughters. If you know what I mean.”
Steve nodded his head. He knew what he meant.
“I mean, if there’s grass on the field. Play ball!” Larry continued.
Yes, you’ve made that clear.”
Larry puffed his chest out and smirked in satisfaction. He was proud of his cleverness.
“Larry, all I’m saying is that you can admit that another man is conventionally attractive. It doesn’t make you a homosexual to do so. I can admit it and I’m not gay.”
Larry sighed. “Listen buddy. I ain’t exactly thrilled about being trapped in this elevator either but there are better ways to pass the time don’t ya think? I got a game I sometimes play with the fellas at the job site where we try to rank the cast of The Golden Girls in order of who’s the most DTF. Now, obviously Blanche is number 1 but after that things get tricky. I’m inclined to say Rose is next but my gut sometimes tells me that Dorothy can back that ass up if ya know what I mean.”
Steve looked at his watch. They had been trapped now for 9 minutes.
“That’s a good one,” he said. “What about the cast of Friends? Try ranking them from hottest to least hottest.”
“Hot damn!” Larry slapped his knee. “Now you’re taking! Well Of course I’m gonna go with Rachael first. Love me some Jennifer Anniston. Shiiiitt! Then I’m gonna go with Phoebe followed by Monica. See, a lot of guys, they’d pick Monica, then Phoebe. Not me though, I love me some blondes and you just know Phoebes a freak in bed!”
Steve nodded his head in agreement prompting Larry to continue.
“Yeah you just know that Phoebe is into some kinky shit, right? Like super kinky, Shiiiitt! Monica would probably try spend all her time worrying about having to clean the sheets right afterwards. Ha, am I right? Shiiiitt!”
Larry pulled his phone out of his pocket and looked at the time. “God damn,” he muttered. “Been in here 10 whole minutes.
“Keep going,” Said Steve.
“What do you mean keep going?”
“Keep going. What about Chandler, Joey and Ross?”
“Oh hell, man! How many times I gotta tell you I’m not into dudes?”
“And how many times do I have to tell you that you don’t have to be into them to make that distinction?”
“Maybe for you,” Larry sneered. “Not me though. Shit! I love women too much! Men all look the same to me!”
“Alright, gun to your head. You’re shown a side by side picture of a shirtless Zac Efron and Moe from The 3 Stooges and you’ve got to pick which one looks better. Who are you choosing?”
“Hell, I don’t know!”
“Larry, there’s a gun to your fucking head!”
“Then I guess I’m dying then,” Larry shouted. “I’m sure you’d love that, wouldn’t you?”
“No, I wouldn’t love it if you died, Larry. I just want you to admit that men can be attractive!”
“Why? What the hell do you care!”
Steve sighed. Why did he care? What precisely was he gaining from this interaction? He decided to concede the matter as he had way too much going on in his life to worry about reasoning with a complete stranger.
“Never mind,” he told Larry. “You’re right. Men aren’t attractive. Only women.”
Larry nodded his head in satisfaction. He knew that it took a big man to admit when they’re wrong even if that big man seems to really be into other dudes. He reached out and patted Steve on the shoulder. “It’s alright, buddy,” he said. “We’ll be outta this bitch soon.”
Steve looked at his watch. They had been stuck in the elevator for 12 minutes. He sighed again. “Yep, all men look the same. Me, Brad Pitt, Ryan Gosling, even Dr. Sing-huh….
“Dr. Sing-huh is ugly as hell,” Larry blurted out while pulling the doctor’s business card. “Take a look at this sonbitch,” he laughed while shoving the card in Steve’s face.
“Now, you see,” Steve interjected. “You see what you just did there, right?”
“See what?”
“After vehemently denying that you notice certain physical traits of men that are universally considered attractive, you described a man as ugly, which contradicts all of your previous statements claiming all men look the same.”
Larry appeared confused. “What?”
“Don’t you see, Larry? If you can admit that a man is unattractive then surely you notice when it’s the opposite.”
“What are you trying to say?”
“What I’m trying to say, Larry. What I’ve been trying to say this whole time is that men can be attractive. You called Dr. Singh ugly but I noticed you didn’t call any of the other guys I mentioned ugly. You just said you didn’t know whether they looked good or not. You said you couldn’t tell the difference. But your description of Dr. Singh proves otherwise.”
“So I didn’t call the other guys ugly. So what!”
“Well what’s the opposite of ugly, Larry?”
“Good looking?”
“Exactly.”
“Hey, wait a minute,” Larry lunged towards the emergency phone. “Help,” he screamed into the receiver. “This guy’s trying to make me gay!”
“Larry! Larry, calm down!” Steve said trying to pull the phone out of his hands.
“Listen you two!” A familiar annoyed voice boomed through the telephone. “I already told you we’re working on it!”
“Sorry,” both men exclaimed at the same time. Larry hung up the phone and looked shook up. Steve not knowing how to react patted him on the shoulder and said, “It’s ok buddy. We’ll be out of this bitch soon.”
“So, I guess I’m gay, huh?” Larry asked timidly.
“Oh Jesus!” Steve sighed.
“How am I gonna tell my parents?”
“You’re not gay!” Steve shouted. “For fuck’s sake!”
“Are you sure?”
“Pretty sure, yeah.”
“So… I’m straight?”
“Larry, 5 minutes ago, you described to me in detail how you’d have sex with Bea Arthur. You’re clearly straight.”
“Oh,” Larry stood up straight and dusted his shoulders off. “I guess you’re right.” He wiped a single tear from his eyes and embraced Steve in a bear hug. “Thanks man. For everything.”
Steve looked down at the floor which was now several inches below him as he was wrangled by Larry’s large frame and thought again to himself, ‘Of course this is happening.’
The two men spent the next 47 minutes together discussing everything under the sun before the elevator was eventually freed from its stationery position. Upon finally reaching the doctor’s office they were both told that they were extremely late for their appointments and would need to reschedule. Steve chuckled to himself, ‘Of course.’
Larry and Steve walked together back outside while taking the stairs obviously and parted ways after exchanging phone numbers.
“See ya later, Larry,” Steve said. “It was good to meet you.”
He then turned towards his car and began to walk before feeling a vibration from his pocket. He pulled his phone out and saw that it was a text from Larry. He glanced back at the man he had just spent an entire hour with trapped in an elevator, who was still standing 10 feet away with a smirk on his face. “One for the road.” Larry said before spinning on his heels and walking away.
Steve looked down at his phone and read the text.
“Fuck, Marry, Kill? Chandler, Joey, Ross.”

It's actually kind of fun when you start chatting with somebody who is trying to tell you some kind of elaborate lie like they are the queen of Sweden or they are homeless because they were a waitress that sneezed into somebody's soup or whatever the hell sob story they have trying to get your attention. When I meet an interesting one with a good sob story I will play with it pretend I am interested etc just to see where they are going with it. Eventually they need a Amazon gift card number or pictures of my feet or whatever the fuck there after. I pretend to play along with them without giving them what they want as long as I can just to see how long it will go. Eventually they disappear and the account gets deleted etc etc and while it's fun to see how long I can string them along some of them I actually miss because their sob story is pretty damn creative

It's actually kind of fun when you start chatting with somebody who is trying to tell you some kind of elaborate lie like they are the queen of Sweden or they are homeless because they were a waitress that sneezed into somebody's soup or whatever the hell sob story they have trying to get your attention. When I meet an interesting one with a good sob story I will play with it pretend I am interested etc just to see where they are going with it. Eventually they need a Amazon gift card number or pictures of my feet or whatever the fuck there after. I pretend to play along with them without giving them what they want as long as I can just to see how long it will go. Eventually they disappear and the account gets deleted etc etc and while it's fun to see how long I can string them along some of them I actually miss because their sob story is pretty damn creative

P.S. I know there are a lot of spelling and grammar errors; keep in mind that this is a first draft, and I am not fixing such errors right now. I am mainly looking for thoughts on the quality of writing and story itself.
The sky was grey and clogged with dark sagging clouds that seemed brooding and ready to release their sodden payload. Ironically the street was clogged with people who rushed antlike from place to place shoulders hunched eyes glancing furtively at the clouds. Amid the rush of black and brown and occasional blond heads rushing down the overladen sidewalks, there was a head of hair the shade of red on associated with crimson droplets of beaded blood or dark wine being swished in a glass.
Cain Caddel the owner of this remarkable hair, was not particularly special himself, at least in regards to his standing in society. He was a single middle-aged man who lived a comfortable and private life in a wooden cabin outside of the city. He had a golden retriever named Angel and had many books which he liked to read by the fire before bed. He had a standard paper pushing job in which he was competent and made good money in, but in which he had showed no inclination to climb the corporate ladder. He was gradually, though not slowly accumulating money for retirement. In short, Cain lived a comfortable life, the sort of which he had dreamed of when he had struggled simply to survive many years past. If Cain could describe his situation in one word it would be, content.
Cain was not in a hurry to get home to his dog and he did not care about the rain. He had felt it in the past and would feel it again. He only walked fast so as not to disrupt the swift tidelike flow of the crowd. The was nothing demanding his attention, nothing to stress him, nothing to bother him. Wasn’t this the closest thing to liberation a man could achieve? He had reached the final peak of all he had ever desired and he was satisfied. In that moment and for a reason which he could not precisely explain, Cain felt an intense, almost euphoric feeling of contentment. He felt a rising urge to laugh hysterically, but repressed it with surprising difficulty.
Perhaps it was the whim of a cruel God that made the following events happen when they did.
Cain felt a sudden ache in his head like how he felt midway through a bad headache, but as soon as it had appeared, the sensation vanished. It was as abrupt as running into a tree you hadn’t seen or teleporting somewhere utterly random. Then Cain missed a step and then another. He stumbled forward in a drunken shamble his head suddenly swimming in sluggish circles. Then he recovered. The entire sensation disappeared as instantaneously as it had appeared. For a moment Cain Found himself staring blankly at the ground too bewildered to notice anything.
But of course, then he heard the screaming.
It was the loudest scream the broke him out of his reverie. It was a man’s voice gibbering and high.
“STOP, STOP, STOP, STOP!,” repeated again and again mindlessly and pleadingly. The were other noises too. Whimpering moans, high wails, cries for help. Looking around Cain saw many people collapsed on the ground. The man who had cried stop was spasming violently and foaming at the mouth. His cries to stop were swiftly being replaced with vague gurgles. Most were not in the condition of the stop man though. Many quivered violently on the ground or screamed as though they were undergoing slow and brutal torture, but they were better than the stop man.
There were even a few stragglers who had not collapsed and had simply fallen to a knee or leaned against a wall. They all had faces screwed with pain and clenched fists. The faces of people who had just stepped on a nail or were undergoing surgery without medication.
Abruptly, Cain wondered why he was not experiencing such pain, or whatever it was. In the entire visible stretch of sidewalk he was the only one standing-
There was a deep thud and a crash of breaking glass as car crashed into the side of a glass skyscraper. Panes rippled and then shattered high up the building in a wave which left a wake of falling glittering shards. The shards fell among the catatonic people in a shattering rain. An errant piece hit Cain’s arm but failed to penetrate the fabric of his suit. Another grazed his temple, leaving a searing line of pain.
Cain decided to run.
He had no clue, no fucking clue what was going on, but staying outside seemed like a stupid idea. The smart move was to hide somewhere and wait this out. He felt a flash of guilt at the thought of leaving all the people out there to the mercy of errant cars and mysterious pain, but what could he do when everyone was affected? No, it was best to lie low and wait. Cain sprinted toward the nearest safe building, he had to be fast. there was no telling when the next derailed car would crash. He hopped over quivering torsos, and limp hands. Too limp. And the he pulled open the translucent glass door of some off brand looking retail store.
Without bothering scouting his surroundings, Cain ran through racks of wacky T-shirts and shelved of knickknacks, toward the back of the store which had an unlabeled door. Second floor, it must be! The first floor was unsafe, especially with all those windows, and that glass door. He needed high ground for safety.
There was a titanic roar and a concussion that thrust Cain forward and to his knees in a painful bump. The very windows he had been worried about burst violently inward along with dust, and debris, and…. and a red chunk. A chunk that looked like a piece of raw beef. It flew through the air and landed with a wet, small sound. A sound that seemed too small and too real. Cain stared at the chunk fascinated by it. He knew what it was, but.. No why think about it, it did no good. It would disctract him from what mattered. He needed to get to the second floor and wait for this die down, that was what he needed to do.
Everything would be fine and die down if he just waited on the second floor… Cain was still riveted by the chunk. it was red and glistening, and it pooled its redness around itself in a slow leak. Was like grocery store meat, so impersonal, so inhuman.
Cain stood, fast and shook his head like a dog. He turned around and walked through the unmarked door. It led to an unlit and narrow staircase with dirty white paint; the kind one would imagine coke gets snorted from liberally.
The staircase led to a hallway, which was essentially just a hallway version of the staircase: narrow dirty and poorly lit, and generally indicative of drug deals. There was a row of doors with golden numbers, and a shabby brown carpet and a row of windows overlooking the street. Amond a field of sprawling bodies there was a number of stragglers who stumbled drunkenly around the road as if they were heavily drugged. Glittering shards of broken glass sparkled cheerfully up between corpses and the occasional bang or scream could be heard In the background. A red flicker glinted off of the shards of glass.
“My fucking God, Lord have mercy, what the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck.” Cain whispered his eyes breathily to himself, speaking out loud for the first time since the disaster began. Scenes kept replaying in his mind, over and over again in a cruel loop. The man screaming stop again and again futilely, like a pig at slaughter who knows it is about to die. His bloodshot eyes rolling sightlessly. The sides of his mouth foamed with white froth. The car hitting the building straight on, confidently and without hesitation, the driver killing himself. The chunk of meat that looked beef from a grocery store that had plopped down beside him like a treat tossed to an obedient dog.
Cain closed his eyes and breathed in slowly and shakily, then he breathed out. He tried to blot out the images and shut out the cycle. Images kept multiplying and reappearing: Ameobus that multiplied after being cut apart. But eventually he calmed down enough to think and be rational. He opened his eyes, though his breathing was still ragged and shaking.
“Ok what the fuck.” He whispered to himself, knowing he didn’t need to whisper but not caring. “What happened?”
It was like an Emp to the brain that had swept over everyone at once and destroyed people’s circuitry, though not everyone had been treated equally.
He was the prime example of that.
He had gotten off easy with just bad headache and a stumble for a few seconds, whereas others sounded as if their very souls were being rent apart. What was the significance of his near immunity? He had not worn any special headwear or worn any special clothing. He had no metal on him apart from his watch, phone, and parts of his pants. Could it be that he had been standing in just that right place for the attack to affect him to a lesser degree, the same way a lucky blind man could survive a hail of arrows by standing in the right place? It seemed unlikely. And he was already assuming it was an attack in the first place. It could have been aliens or the fucking wrath of God.
There was no benefit to speculation anyway, he needed to focus on the present. As it was, all he knew was that everyone in the immediate area was either dead or wandering in a drugged daze. He had no knowledge of how extensive this effect was; for all he knew, the entire continent, or hell the entire world had been affected. He could be the only sane person alive in the world.
So he should try to gather information, then. Cain took out his phone and opened the news app to the most recent story.
Oklahoma F4 Hurricane Kills Four, 10 Million In Estimated Damages.
Not surprising. The event was too sudden for anyone to make a news story already, and, if this had happened everywhere of course, who would make it ? All the writers and journalists were probably dead or more fucking zombies.
Wait what was he doing anyway? He didn’t know how extensive this was and for all he knew it could have only affected the immediate area. The police station was an hour away; it could be unaffected!
He dialed 911, it rang once, then twice, then three times, then ten times, then twenty. He glanced at his watch after five minutes and hung up the call. No good, he was being too optimistic.
So what did he do now? The news was out, and the police were probably the same as everyone else. There were no friends he wanted to call, and his mom was long dead. Any siblings either didn’t exist or were too separated for him ever to find them. He stared blankly at the useless keypad of his phone app for a minute before an idea came to him.
He opened Facebook, eyes glued to the blue f and heart beating rapidly. This would work, he knew it would. People of all kinds, all over the world used Facebook. If anyone else was alive in reasonable numbers, then there would be some kind of information on Facebook. And maybe this fucking nightmare only occurred in the surrounding few miles. Maybe the police were just busy and unable to pick up, that would be understandable given the situation. Maybe the news was working on a story right now and it was breaking news on every tv in bars and stores and houses all across America.

Breaking News: A deadly and unexplainable phenomenon engulfed the California Town of Mount St Louis. Initial Probe reveals thousands dead and thousand more catatonic. Experts are still researching cause…

The blue f faded and revealed a list of posts. The first was a picture of a solemn looking yellow lab curled in a corner surrounded by puppies with the snarky title of: Running from Her Responsibilities. The post was from six days ago.
Cain felt an irrational and sudden dip in his excitement but forced it away. Was he expecting all his desires to be magically fulfilled in the first second of opening the app? It wasn’t like Facebook regularly showed posts from less than an hour ago in the feed. But… With a frown, Cain went to preferences and switched to most recent. The blue F returned and disappeared as the page loaded and Cain’s Eyes widened, his heart beating rapidly and his chest feeling light and airy.
All of the most recent posts were about the same thing. I collapsed and now everyone around me is... Does anyone know if the police….Can someone…I was cooking and my wife fell over do you… Please help…
The posts were all accompanied by pictures. They were all different, many showed pictures of the street in different towns, all with the same story: people collapsed everywhere with a few stragglers, often crashed cars or damage was visible. Many people were isolated or with a friend or family and posted about collapsing and not being able to contact anyone or about family dying in extreme pain. One man survived after driving on a crowded highway, his picture showing a hellscape of overturned cars, scattered metal with intermittent fires, and sprawled and dismembered corpses.

Cain’s heart pounded in a dreadful THUMP THUMP that resonated through his chest in cruel and rapid beats. There were posts from everywhere. There was one from Florida and one from South Dakota, and dozens more from unnamed towns that could be anywhere. America was dead.
Jesus Christ is the world over? His legs weakened, whatever passive energy that had been holding them up draining out like water through sieve. He fell to his knees with a dull thump, but his didn’t care about the pain. A funny thought occurred to him.
I actually fell to my knees. I thought that was just the kind of shit people say when they’re being overdramatic.
The world was over. He knew it. This was not some attack, there was no technology that could do this. It might be aliens and it might be God, though it was probably something else. But it didn’t matter. It was over.
He sat there for a second just thinking about it all. He had been walking home to see Angel, then he was going to make dinner. He had been thinking about grilling a burger, and he would give some to her. He would read more of a mystery novel he had found at the Barnes and Noble. It was light thing, the book version of popcorn, but he wanted to finish it. He was going to work tomorrow. What was going to happen now? What did he do now?

Well first he had to wait and then of course he needed food and water and shelter. And he would obviously need to make it home to Angel. The streets would be clogged with crashed cars and corpses, so no driving fa car for poor old Cain. Maybe a bike or a motorcycle? He couldn’t drive one but he could take it slow. There would be no angry drivers honking the shit out of him for going 10 miles per hour. And when he got the hang of it he could go faster, maybe 20. But it the roads looked like the hellscape in the post he saw, then maybe he would have to stick to 10.

He felt a bit of pressure pass out from him like air whistling out of the end of an overfilled balloon. He knew what to do, yeah the world probably, well almost certainly, ended, but he had a solid course of action for the next few days. He just need to wait another hour to be absolutely sure nothing would explode or fall or otherwise reduce him to the state of one of the fortunate people lying dead on the street.
He leaned back against the wall and looked at the shoddy golden letter seven on the door opposite him. Behind him, the laden clouds finally released their load. Heavy droplets of rain pattered down on the dead streets. On the pavement, a man whose gaze was vacant of the normal thoughtfulness and constant analysis of a human being looked up as a cold droplet impacted his forehead. He stood where he was for a moment, his hair soon growing flat and waterlogged his suit clinging to his round middle-aged body, almost seeming to contemplate this new development. Then he kept walking forward, his steps slow and seemingly deliberate.



























Chapter 2.
David Sharp walked down the streets of New York in his standard relaxed yet confident stride, both of his hands in the pockets of his suit pants. It was one of his daily suits, fashionable, and quite expensive, but only enough that it evoked admiration and respect, not jealousy or annoyance at a pointless display of wealth.
He glanced down at a particularly twisted looking corpse. It was a thin and tall woman with equally thin and long blond hair. She wore a homemade looking sweater and had on a delicate pair of slip on shoes. She seemed like the type to bring her neighbors casseroles and call you hon or dear, or so he theorized.
As she was, her mouth was stretched open wide enough to fit a small melon, her jaw looked purple and discolored, the bones seemed to be in almost the wrong place. Her cheeks traced tears of dried blood from empty sockets where eyeballs had burst. Her torso was twisted like a rag doll from a spine broken in pained thrashing.
“Oh my dear, I’m so sorry for you” he said, his voice soft and genuine.
He looked up at a small figure who was standing father down the street.
This was not one of the zombie people whose minds had been broken by the event, but a person, he knew it.
He kept walking forward, his stride now cautious and unsure. He looked around at the broken city around him as if searching for something. When he neared the man, he snapped his head toward him.
“Hey, are you alive?! He rushed up to the man “You don’t look like one of them”
The man turned around to look at David. His eyes were vacant, but not in the same way as the zombies. He wore a dirty band shirt and black exercise pants. His feet were scraped and red and he only had flip flops on.
“Laura, she died. She just died.” He said it in a the monotone of a college student doing a presentation about an obscure African tribe.
“she just fell over and started flailing her arms and screaming. I fell over too and I couldn’t do anything. When I was better, she was dead. I felt her pulse, and she felt too cold. She was pregnant. The baby is dead now too.
David touched the man’s shoulder.
“Come on, you need to eat and get inside. My house is nearby.” He smiled gently.
“I am much luckier than you, since there was no one for me to mourn. Feel welcome to stay as long as you need.”
He guided the man to his apartment with a hand on his back. The man followed with no resistance, his eyes stared constantly forward at some unknown point.
David guided the man to an elevator and up his suite on the fourth floor of the skyscraper. It was a perfect suite. Massive, with high ceiling and white ceiling lights that washed the entire apartment with an even glow, it was full of the kind of modern furniture that made use of simple geometric shapes to create an elegant but straightforward appearance.
He guided the man to an armchair in front of his custom flatscreen. The man sat down, accepting easily. He took to David’s guidance like a lost puppy, his mind was still pliable from his crushing loss, David could feel it.
In fact, David could feel it much more easily than normal. It was not just his ability to flawlessly modulate his emotions and analyze those around him. Martin was open to him, his mind was peeled apart by his loss: a normally solid wall, crushed by a fierce battering ram of emotional destruction.
Martin! That is his name, I am utterly sure.
David’s facial muscles twitched up in an involuntary smile, perhaps the first involuntary emotional response he had experienced since early childhood.
This could be very good. And he had the perfect test subject sitting placid and pliable, waiting for his guiding hand.
David reached out with an invisible hand toward Martin’s mind. He had always had the hand, he realized, but it had been more of a finger. It nudged, prodded, and massaged, but it lacked force, so much force that he had not known he had been using it. It was many times stronger now, maybe hundreds of times.
The hand plunged into the soft pliable mind as one would plunge their arm into a bowl of Jello.
“Uuuh!” Martin said.
He jerked slightly as if he had been shocked.
The fingers felt Martin’s Love for Laura and her blond hair and mischievous jokes, and the crushing, overwhelming emotional emptiness when he felt her cold dead corpse. The fingers explored, wiggling and invading. Martin’s Childhood memories were in there, they saw that he had gone to college for a year, but realized that he had always been too lazy to really apply himself. They saw him meeting Laura at the office and getting to know her. She was always serious when working, but she had a cute side where she laughed and joked. He had a love for classic video games, especially Mario, and he…
Martin was spasming violently, his hands clawed at his scalp and ripped out chunks of dirty black hair as though he was trying to remove a rabid rat from his skull.
He went. “UUUH, UUUUUHH, UUUUH!”
The hand stopped exploring and retracted carefully.
David sped over to the pathetic man, whose head now lolled loosely on his shoulder. He put a hand on Martin’s shoulder.
“Martin, Jesus, what happened? Did it happen to you again, the thing that killed everyone, I mean?
He ran over to Martin’s other side and examined his face.
The eyes were now as vacant as a zombie and a line of translucent drool traced down his chin and neck. His body was limp and responseless.
The hand split apart into many tiny gentle tendrils and wormed their way into Martin’s mind. David had not known he could do it until he had already started.
The hand had mashed and scrambled Martin’s weakened mind: a clumsy toddler playing with a fragile nest. The tendrils were very different.
They wormed their way quietly and harmlessly along, moving, fixing, rearranging; a hundred thousand fingers, reassembling a shattered mind.
More than a mere 100 times stronger
Martin bucked a few times, some invisible mechanisms being triggered accidentally. Then the vacant eyes were once again occupied. Martin sat up in his chair as his muscles regained control.
Martin stared fixedly at the T.V. then turned to examine the furniture and the window with the view of New York. He brought his hand to his face looking, most likely, at the dirty fingernails and scabbed over cuts. He put his hand down and sat for a few moments.
He stood and turned around, now looking at David. His eyes were no longer crushed and empty, but wide and confused.
“How…how did I get here?”
David smiled.
“I found you wandering around the street and at first I thought you must be one of those zombies. But I was walking nearby, and I saw that you looked a little different. It was hard to put a finger on; a certain clearness of the eyes, maybe. So I asked if you were alive and you responded with some meaningless sounds. It was quite clear that your mind was barely holding on.”
“Of course, I never leave a man in need so I escorted you to my house and set you down in a chair. It seemed likely to me that in your case the ailment of the mind was of a lesser degree and might heal over time. As we both can see, you are standing.”
Martin stood and absorbed the stream of information the same as a stone cliff might absorb a passing wind.
“I think… I lost something, but I can’t remember. Its fuzzy, I-“
“Oh God, Oh Shit!”
Suddenly he leaned forward as if he had been struck in the crotch and held his head.
“It fucking hurts!” Martin screamed, “Oh fucking God, it hurts!
David walked over to Martin and eased him into the chair.
“Sit down,” he said in his most gentle voice. “sit here for a second and you will feel a little bit better.”
David put his hand on Martin’s back and soothed. The hand’s touch soft and guiding, massaged the aching mind.
After a few minutes Martin’s back muscles relaxed.
“Thank you,” he whispered.
“Do not thank me. I am simply doing my duty as a decent human being.”
Martin turned to David with a face of mixed gratitude, and intense confusion.
“Please… what happened.”
“First, you should look outside. It will explain better than I am capable of. Hold on to your stomach.”
Martin walked toward the window with an unsteady studder to his steps. He tilted his down and looked at the street only to jerk back in shock. Little black shapes littered the street, and several cars were piled on top of each other like pancakes tossed in a lazy pile.
“Jesus!”
Before Martin could speak further, David began explaining
“I do not know exactly what happened, but three days ago, there was something like a wave that swept over everyone in the world, as far as I can tell. Most died, and most who survived turned into what I and the remainder of the internet is calling zombies; people who live but only in the scientific sense. They have no mind; they walk around in a shambles without any apparent direction. Out of those who did not die, a bare fraction retained their mind: their ability to think and make logical decisions.”
David spoke in the businesslike but sad-tinged tone of someone who has accepted a truth but has yet to fully move past it.
“I do not know what spared this group, whether it was some unknown factor or pure random chance. But I would be surprised if more than 1 in 1000 people survived, though that is a wild guess based on nothing but my own intuition. You are the first person I have seen that I am absolutely sure is not a zombie.”
“I believe that your headache and your fuzzy mind were caused by the wave. I theorize that the wave affected everyone to a different degree, in the most extreme cases, people died in minutes, but some took hours to die. I believe you were affected almost to the point of zombification, but the effect ended right on the brink between a living mind and a shattered one. When I found you, your eyes seemed to have a spark of intelligence but little more.”
Martin still looked out of the window, with a hunched back and dark hair hanging in strings.
“What about me…what happened to me? I lost something.”
David walked next to Martin; lips pinched in a sympathetic line.
“Martin, I don’t know… how could I? Everyone in the world had to deal with the wave on their own. I felt pain like you did. How could I have been there when it happened to you? I only found you by chance. As your mind strengthens it may come to you and it may not, that is the best I can tell you.”
Martin turned to look at David, his eyes were bloodshot from tears, his stubble and greasy strands of hair seemed to stand out.
“How do you know my name? I never told you.”
David smiled his gentle smile again.
“You let it slip out while you were a near zombie. I thought it would be good for you to hear it again, nothing more than that.”
The hand reached out to Martin’s mind, ready sooth away irrational anger and needless distrust, but it felt a wall. A wall of sturdy steel-hard will.
Martin’s eyes grew wide and he took a step back.
“You, you just tried to do something to me! I felt it in my mind!
David’s smile smoothly transitioned into an expression of affront and sad understanding.
He spoke slowly and with a hint of hurt.
“David, I know that you are confused and angry, but all I have ever done is help you. Please try to direct your anger at something else. I do not mind being supportive, I cannot help if you lash out.”
Martin’s expression softened, and he hesitated.
It was then that the hand, now a fist, struck.
The wall of steel shattered and the hand drew back splitting apart into tendrils which weened their way into the crevices of Martin’s mind.
Martin instantly relaxed, all anger and suspicion disappearing like a candleflame before a gale.
But then a wave a steel hard resolve exploded out of Martins mind and the tendrils were blown apart.
The hand started reforming itself.
I cannot be gentle with this one.
Martin’s face screwed up in an expression of utter rage.
“You FUCK, you BASTARD, it was you wasn’t it!”
Martin charged at David a pocketknife gleaming in his hand.
Hidden the whole time.
David turned on a heel and dodged Martin. Of course he had taken self-defense courses. He could defeat and immobilize Martin easily, but Martin was useless now, he was too fargone to be worth keeping.
David, caught Martin’s wrist and with an efficient twist, had Martin on his stomach with an arm stuck behind his back. There he patiently waited. One second. Two seconds. Three seconds.
The hand reformed.
Four seconds. Five seconds….
David fed his will into the hand, increasing its size and its power.
Ten seconds.
The hand seemed about to explode. It was a white-hot pulsing mass of will.
Martin seemed about to know what was going to happen.
“PLEASE, PLEASE, STOP, I’M SORRY-“
The hand crashed into Martin’s feeble wall.
It tore apart like a thin sheet of rice paper.
It sank deep into Martin’s mind and he moaned in pain. David felt more and more of Martin’s memories. They came earlier and earlier the deeper he went until he saw a sweet face with dark hair and red lips, and feeling of warmth and simple love. Then he let the hand explode.
Martin Jerked upwards almost throwing David off of him and then went limp. Blood pooled from where his eyes faced the floor.
David, got up and walked to the window with his hands behind his back.
“It seems that I am not the only one who changed.”










Chapter 3

It's actually kind of fun when you start chatting with somebody who is trying to tell you some kind of elaborate lie like they are the queen of Sweden or they are homeless because they were a waitress that sneezed into somebody's soup or whatever the hell sob story they have trying to get your attention. When I meet an interesting one with a good sob story I will play with it pretend I am interested etc just to see where they are going with it. Eventually they need a Amazon gift card number or pictures of my feet or whatever the fuck there after. I pretend to play along with them without giving them what they want as long as I can just to see how long it will go. Eventually they disappear and the account gets deleted etc etc and while it's fun to see how long I can string them along some of them I actually miss because their sob story is pretty damn creative

I (45F) and spouse (46M) have been together over 7 years. I have never been attracted to him. He was just a friend for 20 years prior. He moved to the town I lived in and came with nothing and was staying with random people trying to get on his feet after a 17 year toxic relationship. Him and his ex gf had 3 sons. And they had lost them to foster care. He was really putting his self into getting his kids back. And started asking me for rides to see them or when he’d get them for a visit he’d want it at my house. He was working really hard I thought. And I was helping out my friend as much as possible. After a year of helping him I let him move in with me and I drew up legal paperwork and helped him get custody of his kids back. He couldn’t pay much towards his own kids or bills cause all of his money went to back child support. We kind of just became a couple I had 3 sons to but only 2 was still at home. It was really hard for us to be intimate with each other. Fast forward another year and I had a huge suspicion that he had been using me. My mother even overheard him telling his brother how much money I make. Then I found out he’d been cheating on me the whole time from day one and using drugs. The people he was screwing in his threesome relationship sent me pictures of him in sexual acts at his work place. He still denied it. I kicked him out of my house and his kids. They had no where really to go but a little bitty trailer that was packed full already with my spouse’s family. His kids started blowing up my phone begging me to take their dad back. He was leaving flowers on my porch every morning for 3 months. I gave in with strict boundaries. No more drugs and he had to get a job that I chose for him. That was 5 or 6 years ago now. He did quit drugs and he’s done well at the job I chose for him and makes as much money as I do. I just can’t stand him still. I had planned to call it off for good then my daughter in law committed suicide and I had to fight to get custody of my granddaughters. He was there for me like I was for him when he was trying to get his boys. He’s a great papa too. He pays more than half the bills now too. Still not much intimacy now mostly my fault I just don’t yearn for him in that way. My big thing is he lies about random small stupid lies and will even get his boys to try and do it. For example I asked his now adult son if he was using fabric softener to wash his clothes instead of the washing soaps and the kid was thinking way to long and dad said you used the soap right and the kid said yea of course I did. Or another example is our fridge has a beep if it’s left open. And he(spouse)?came out of the kitchen and I heard it beeping I said did you leave the fridge open and he said psst no like I was an idiot but then jumped up to go in there and I watched him from behind close it and he still denied he left it open. It’s dumb lies like that all the time over everything and I’m just to the point I could care less to speak to him. You can’t argue with an idiot. I also lost my middle son when he was 22 years old in March 2023 my son hated my spouse because he knew he was cheating on me but never told me cause he didn’t want to hurt me. My son always said I am living a fake life and now that’s all I can see. Sorry for long rant I’m just so confused and lost anymore.

Hi everyone, I was hoping for advice on where to put my TV and a couch (waiting to buy couch). Either L couch to the right and TV on the left wall, or smaller couch to the left a couple feet from the wall. The dimensions are 10’6” from the window and 12’ wall to wall (picture attached. I’d like a couch big enough to really relax and want to have a footrest in the form of probably an ottoman. Thank you all so much for any help!.
Note there is no storage door that opens to the living room, it opens to the deck.
Paul

Plot
When Beshte's dad Basi gets injured by a frightened young rhino while creating hippo lanes in the flood plains after a big rainstorm, Beshte must step up and make the hippo lanes instead. Meanwhile, Kion, Bunga, Ono, and Fuli lead a herd of stubborn antelope led by Bupu to higher ground, and Makuu and his float of crocodiles return and try to help Basi so that there will be no rules to stop them.
Song: "Makin' Hippo Lanes"
Pros
-This is a really sweet father-son episode between Beshte and Basi. It's the first episode where we really get a feel for who Basi is as a character and I really like him. He's loving, compassionate, kind, sweet, fatherly, encouraging and most importantly supportive of Beshte just because he made a mistake while making the hippo lanes.
I like him because he's such a model dad, comforting Beshte about his mistake and not just flying off the handle and chewing him out for it. I love this because Beshte can't be older than 14 at this point and so he still has a lot to learn. Plus, it was his first time making the hippo lanes that we wouldn't have had to make except that Basi got injured at the start when Habib (let's call the little rhino "Habib" from now on because it means "Precious" in Swahili) panicked and accidentally poked him with his horn. Anyways, I love Basi for being completely understanding, with the knowledge that Beshte is not used to making the Hippo Lanes and therefore, made a genuine rookie mistake.
-Makuu is back and I'm thrilled about this because he was such a cool, menacing and really charismatic villain. I love him because he has an ulterior motive that's kind of similar to Scar in the original film, to give himself power over the crocodiles and the entire floodplains. Another reason he's really cool is because he has a really menacing and threatening presence in the Pride Lands whenever he's around and actually looks like someone who you wouldn't want to mess with. I do think Beshte and Basi were right to chase him away though, because he was making the floodplains a scary place when it was supposed to be a safe place and he was clearly trying to terrorize everyone. Given all the trouble he caused in "Never Roar Again", I wouldn't want him in the Floodplains either, though. Also, there's again, another unspoken rule about not eating the children of the Pride Lands.
-I love the fact that Makuu has a bit of a rivalry with Basi and resents the idea the hippos (in the Pride Lands at least, remember guys, hippos are not like that in real life) are rule-following, peaceful animals in contrast to crocodiles. So, I'm not surprised that he has a personal vendetta against Basi's pod, especially considering that as long as hippos are in charge of the watering hole, Makuu can't really do anything because they are more powerful than him. From what we've seen in "The Rise of Makuu", he seems to have a long-standing rivalry with the hippos and they were probably always fighting.
"Hippos.... always obeying the rules," Makuu, aggravated. "Come on. One little rhino's not worth the effort." Realistic behaviour on his part. I mean, Basi and Beshte would whoop his ass into the next world if necessary. Hippos are way more ferocious than any other animal in the Savannah and are one of the fiercest animals worldwide.
-Why do you guys think Habib was in such a hurry anyway that he ran into the Floodplains even though the Hippo Lanes were not ready, yet? Do you think he was being chased by Makuu's float or was in a hurry to meet up with his herd or something?
-I liked when Kion and the rest of the Lion Guard came on the scene and how they're all equally concerned about Basi's leg being hurt by Habib (accidentally, of course). Kion informs him to not walk on that leg, which is actually a realistic thing because in feel life, if you do injure your leg, it's best not to walk on it for a while or at least not do anything strenuous and just start small so you can help it to recover rather than make the pain worse. Kion is such a sweet boy for informing him of that and constantly showing concern for every animal in the Pride Lands. Basi kind of feels all of the Guard's father in some way, doesn't he?
-"Maybe Basi should be on the Lion Guard too, Kion," Bunga. I mean, he's not wrong. The Pride Lands' wisest or the Pride Lands' kindest/sweetest animal. By the way, Basi would make a good teacher role for Kion and his friends.
-I like the worldbuilding and lore aspect in this episode. In this episode, as promised in the title, we are told that Basi is in charge of making the Hippo Lanes for the Pride Landers after a big rainstorm and that his son, Beshte, is learning the ropes of it at the start. I like this mechanic because Basi is the leader of the hippos in the kingdom, and so, it's job to teach his son what will be his responsibility someday. I like how every animal in the Pride Lands has their own customs.
-I love how much Beshte really wants to make the Hippo Lanes for Basi's sake because obviously, his father is in no fit to do them at that point. Beshte is understandably nervous because it's a huge responsibility for a child to have and he was just learning how to do it at the beginning of the episode. I love how Kion, being an absolute sweetheart, encourages him and ultimately relaxes him telling him that as the Strongest hippo in the Pride Lands, they all believe in him. Also, I like this mechanic of by making the Hippo Lanes, he'd be automatically helping with the circle of life, like he's supposed to.
-Bunga; "What's the big deal? The floodplains will dry up soon. There's not a cloud in the sky." Thunder clouds start rumbling over the Pride Lands. Don't jinx it! Fuli; "You what they say, if ya don't like the weather on the Savannah, just wait a few breaths." You're damn right, Fuli. That was actually a really funny joke they threw in the episode because it's very accurate.
-I've always liked the main plot-point of this episode because it's actually believable. Did you know that in real life, hippos are known as "ecological engineers" and can modify and influence their own habitat and ecosystem. Just like Basi and Beshte, after a heavy rainstorm in real life, hippos actually do plough through submerged wetland or grassland areas, that are used by other animals living in the same habitat. In doing so, they make nutrients flow around and end up making new gateways for different types of animals. Other animals follow the hippos into these wetland areas to access more food, nutrients and shelter. So, I like how this episode is about something that hippos actually do.
-I love Beshte in this episode. He's such a big, lovable and kind-hearted sweetheart who's whole motivation is to help animals get where they need to go and to do favours for them, even if he should've told them to wait until the hippos lanes are done. I just can't help but love him for giving animals rides and being kind to them. It fits well with his character to focus more on being nice than to focus on the task at hand, that he's only been assigned to this episode. He's just an adorable, sweet gentle giant whom I can't help but admire.
-I know he wasn't doing the Hippo Lanes the right way, but, I can't help but admire him for his kindness towards animals in the floodplains, even if they shouldn't have been in there in the first place and should've waited until Beshte was finished the task. I still admire him for giving them rides. I understand why Beshte would struggle to say "No" or "You have to wait til I finish the Lanes, okay." He's got a big-heart, like Kion in "Never Judge a Hyena By Its Spots" and "The Kupatana Celebration".
-And actually giving animals rides across the Floodplains, I think, would actually be a good idea, albeit not very convenient. Basi, the leader of the Hippos, probably does not have the time to take every small animal everywhere, not to mention it would be just as easy for them to cross the Floodplains themselves, or on another animal, like a lion or an antelope or something. Maybe they should start a "Pride Lands Riders Association for your crossing pleasures".
-I think the Hippo Lanes is an interesting and a wholesome concept. Hippos are not like in real life, they are extremely territorial to other animals and very aggressive and they are the most dangerous mammals in the world (BBC Wildlife Magazine). That being said, I think this could've been a very send off for Beshte after Season 3. I think this could've been a great new purpose for him instead of the writers making all the Lion Guard go to the Tree of Life. Plus, the start of the episode really hints at Basi training his son to take over his role in the circle of life, someday.
-For the most, I did like the rest of the Lion Guard in this episode. I'm glad that Beshte was the main focus though, because he hasn't really had a dedicated episode besides "Follow that Hippo" earlier on in the Season. But, I liked Kion being the serious, calm, yet frustrated leader trying to corral Bupu's herd of stubborn antelope. It's funny because I feel his frustration at Bupu's stubborn and stuck-up attitude over being bossed around, even though they weren't being bossed around. I love Fuli tolerating Bupu and trying hard not to lose her temper because she's so frustrated that the antelope are not following instructions even though it's all for the best. I feel her frustration towards Bupu because I would be losing my patience as well in that situation, with how annoying the antelope are being at this point. I love Bunga for trying to remain optimistic, but, even he's losing patience. I understand the Lion Guard's annoyance towards the antelopes at the beginning.
-Shout out to the little baby antelope in Bupu's herd for being one of the most adorable babies in the show and making a big pleading face at Bupu, to get out of the water. Also, shout out to Boboka for being the most protective and perfect mother to her little baby and the only real sane member of Bupu's herd. Seriously though, she's the only one reason that Bupu ultimately decides to follow the Lion Guard's instruction. I think she should be leader, tbh. Who let that guy lead the herd?
-"Hang on to your antlers," Bunga. "For one thing they're horns...." Bupu. That was funny because antelopes are often mistaken as being part of the deer family, but, they're actually part of the Bovine genus (aka Cattle family) and so have horns, not antlers. But, I also like the fact that the kids watching the episode may have thought they had antlers, like Bunga in that moment.
-Kion's Roar being used to move the rocks out of the way is a good idea because they would never be able to push them aside since Beshte was not with them at that point. Also, more evidence to suggest Kion and Beshte are the two muscles on the team.
-I like the random cute animals that are riding along on Beshte's back, Laini, Churu (the frog), a wagtail, a hare, young aardvark). I love these more cute scenes in The Lion Guard. Also, I know this not how the Hippo Lanes works, but, how could you say "no" to them?
-I like the way Beshte is not perfect at making the Hippo Lanes at first, he's a young teenager who's only filling in for his father on this occasion and still has a lot to learn about the role. It's like Kion learning how to be good leader. I like that Beshte is clearly a rookie who's not perfect and the job yet, but is learning and is eager to do it because Basi is injured. He's also not able to say "no" to the small animals because of his kind heart and again, his inexperience at making the Hippo Lanes. I love it when the writers explore all the members of the Lion Guard learning new jobs.
-"More like a curly elephant's trunk. Actually, they're more like a bunch of elephants trunks. All twisted up together. And stuck in a Baobab tree's roots." Ono's funny moments. You gotta love for that.
-"This way. Step right up. One new Beshte-made Hippo Lane for all your crossing pleasures! Moms and babies first!" That seems fair to me, tbh. Also, I can't tell you how much I love Bunga for his optimism and his kindness. Also, I love it when he calls them "anty-lanty-lopes".
-Bupu, "Now I bet you'll tell us to get out of the rain. Well, we're not going anywhere!" Fuli, "Good." Bunga, "Yeah, that's kinda what we want." Well done, Bupu, you did something sensible for a change. Also, no, there's no where for you to get out of the rain, anyway.
-Now let's talk about Kion and Ono going into the floodplains. After Boboka and her son accidentally go into the floodplains, thinking that the were ready, they end up getting lost. Kion and Ono go after them to rescue them. First off, Kion dives in to save Boboka's son from drowning. Drowning was a little a dark for this series, especially by Season 1's standards. But, on the other hand, I like stimulating, engaging cartoons that aren't afraid to get dark even if they are made for children. When I first watched that scene back when it came out, I was on edge even though I knew that he wouldn't drown. It made it exciting and compelling for older viewers. I like cartoons that challenge younger children with action sequences. Plus, it was exciting and Kion would obviously risk his own life for the baby, and it was all fine because they got out of it.
-Also, Kion has a big-heart to go and search for Boboka all on his own, without having any eyes in the sky. By the way, he's so much better at swimmer compared to the beginning of Season 1, that means he's gotten stronger at this point. Ono was good as well to protect and guide Boboka's son back to the herd. I mean, I kinda think Kion could've waited with the calf and Ono could've looked for Boboka, but, then again, Ono couldn't carry her like Kion. Maybe the calf could've stayed with them and he wouldn't drown with Kion and Ono around. I don't know, I did like the rescue scene, but, I don't know that that's how I would've done things. But, in fairness, Kion is only cub learning about his role and finding his feet at this point.
-Also, as annoying as Bupu was at the start, I do like the fact that this episode is like the precursor for Fuli and Bupu's "adult/child friendship" later on in the series. I like their dynamic in Season 2 because they're very similar to each other, hot-headed, impatient, short-tempered, stubborn, overconfident, strong-willed, but also very different from each other and so they clash, but are also very loyal to each other. I like how this episode basically founded their relationship. I did like how at the end of the episode, they came to an understanding in the end which was really sweet. By the end, I thought Fuli and Bupu had a really sweet "child/adult" dynamic.
-I loved Beshte and Basi's dynamic at the end too. After Beshte how the Hippo Lanes had gone wrong and that he thinks he let everyone down, Basi comforts him and agrees to help him make a new lane this time "straight and true". Another example of Basi being a total sweetheart and a freaking awesome dad, never once chastising his son for his mistake, but instead, helping him correct his mistake and understanding that it was Beshte's first time making the Hippo Lanes. I know I keep talking about it, but, I've always love their sweet father-son dynamic.
-Makuu returns at the end to murder Basi to in his words "get rid of the rules", while Beshte's back is turned. Makuu is a total savage this episode, but, he has been my favourite villain in Season 1. His voice actor, Blair Underwood is flawless and is clearly loving the role. He has so much charisma. Plus, Makuu trying to outright kill Basi was downright evil and cold and, not to mention dark for a show that was made for kids, after all. I mean, I knew he wasn't going to win, but he's still a great villain, with his intimidating presence in this scene. I get excited every time Makuu's float show up in the series.
-Also, Makuu attempts to murder Basi while he's injured. I thought that was interesting and smart because he knows that Basi would destroy him and his float under different circumstances. In the wild, hippos are, as I said, very aggressive, threatening and powerful, and could go completely ham on every animal if necessary. So, no crocodile can beat up a healthy and fit adult or teenaged hippo, even if they have numbers on their side. I get the writers gave Makuu more of a chance to make things interesting for the audience, but, I'm just saying it's no wonder Makuu opted to bring back up crocs. As soon as Beshte showed up to back Basi, Makuu gets a little afraid because, out of nowhere, came this healthy and fit younger and stronger hippopotamus, enraged by his presence.
-Now, of course Beshte was right to stop Makuu. I mean Makuu was so in the wrong when he said, "we get ride of the hippo, we get ride of the rules." He wasn't talking about hunting or being allowed to eat in the Pride Lands, he was talking about giving himself power over the whole Floodplains, with Basi out of the picture (which would obviously never come to pass because the Lion Guard are keeping Makuu in check at this point). Also, given what Makuu did the last time he tried to take over the Floodplains, I don't blame Beshte for kicking him out, in the end. And, most importantly, Makuu was going to attacked Basi. I mean, he is Beshte's father and Beshte would want to defend by him any means necessary. Of course Beshte wants to whip Makuu's ass at this point. It's one thing wanting to eat in the Pride Lands, but, Makuu clearly had an ulterior motive by wanting to kill of the hippo leader. But, also, I know I would want to do what I can if my family were in danger, I assume you guys in the comments would do the same.
-Speaking of Makuu's attack on Basi, I thought it was clever to use the Hippo Lanes as a way to outsmart him and defeat. Hippos can swim and sprint faster than crocodiles, and Makuu clearly did not see it coming what they were doing. So, I liked it a lot. Beshte went from struggling to do the Hippo Lanes correctly, to using them to defeat a terrible foe in the final act, ultimately tricking Makuu and his float into being trampled by Bupu's herd. Makuu decides to scram after this. Fun Fact: In real life, Beshte or Basi alone, could go completely ham on Makuu's float and essentially destroy them.
-Also, I am sure Kion, being one of Beshte's best friends, knew all about this attempted murder on Basi by Makuu. I think we can assume Beshte told him and the rest of the Guard at some point and that would've caused them to resent Makuu even more by the time of The Savannah Summit, where they do not see good in him for quite a while. Season 1 kind of hints that Kion and Beshte, in particular, had personal vendettas against Makuu because he had caused them stress in the past.
-Finally, to end this review, I liked the scene at the end where Basi commends Beshte for making the Hippo Lanes. It was word for word exactly what Simba said to Kion and Kiara in "Can't Wait To Be Queen", "I never had any doubt."
Cons
-Bupu was fairly annoying at the beginning of this episode. I really didn't like him until the very end. He makes me question, who the heck let this guy lead his herd, anyways? I get that the Lion Guard are children and all, but, they clearly made the right call to lead the antelopes away from their grazing grounds so they don't drown and ushering them away from the rockslide so they don't die. Bupu annoyed me the way he was acting all pissed off and dismissive of the Lion Guard. He accused them of bossing his herd around and berating them even though they wouldn't have had to get angry if Bupu had been more cooperative. It feels like he should already know to get to higher ground to protect his herd. I didn't like the fact that the antelopes were just standing around waiting to be drowned.
-I didn't like how Bupu was disrespecting Fuli towards the end just because she had been losing patience. I would be losing patience as well if I was in that situation. I don't like how when they got them away from their grazing grounds, Bupu said that they've come so far even though they barely left because of him. Also, why is it that Boboka (the sane one of the herd) had to be the one to talk him into it? I think she should be the leader, tbh. I don't like how he berates the Lion Guard, even though the Guard were leading them around so they would be safe. I'm really glad to see Bupu become more likable later on. I am not saying Fuli should've eaten him, but, I am saying that he should've more understanding and more appreciative of the Lion Guard's efforts to help.
-Bunga > Bupu any day. At least Bunga is shown to be cooperative, smart, intelligent, mature, sensible, polite, kind, understanding and wise when he needs to be. What does Bupu think this whole ordeal is, some kind of game? A hoax? A prank? How stupid can you get? I also don't like how Fuli had to apologise to Bupu at the end just because he made her frustrated. She didn't mean to get frustrated. And actually all the Guard got frustrated with the antelope. Fuli did not need to learn anything in this episode or admit to being wrong, in my opinion. Imagine if this had a more severe, life or death situation where they had to force the antelope along. Bupu should learn to understanding people's intentions better and maybe then he won't be a headstrong jerk.
-And the whole "It never hurts to be polite thing" could've been avoided if Bupu had just told that that's all he wanted at the beginning. But, more importantly, he's a terrible role model for little kids in this episode. He demands the Lion Guard say "please" for everything even though they are helping him and his herd get to safety so they don't die. He demands they be polite to him at all costs even they have tried to patient and calm and he wasn't having any of it. Kids need to see that you can't expect someone to say please all the time because there are times where you just have to do as you are being asked for safety or otherwise. I also don't like the way he refuses the get his herd out the floods when he should know what's best for them. He doesn't even think to get the calves out of the water and to higher ground. Leadership 101, for crying out loud! I don't like his attitude for most of the episode and the fact that he removes to see that the Lion Guard are only looking out for him and the rest of his herd by ordering them to cooperate and be safe.
-But, I also do not like his herd at the start of the episode. Boboka is, in fairness, the smartest and the least annoying in this episode because she has the herd's best interests at heart and wants to get them to safety. She also has a son that she wants to protect. But, if I were in her shoes, I would be leading the baby antelopes to safety whether the rest of the decided to follow or not. Are we really expected that there no other calves in the herd with older antelopes? I don't understand why she didn't just take her calf (with other antelope parents) and up and get to higher ground. So, yeah, I liked Boboka, but, that was the only time in the episode where she annoyed me. Any mother would want to get their baby to safety immediately.
Overall
So, I thoroughly enjoyed revisiting this episode and getting to review it. To recap, I loved Beshte and Basi's father-son dynamic. I thought it was really cute and sweet and loving. I love how much they are two characters that jump through hoops for each other to protect each other no matter what. They're kind of similar to Kion and Simba. I do like the dynamic between Basi and the rest of the Lion Guard as well. He feels very fatherly towards them and I like to think he was childhood friends with Simba and Nala, and still is. I found the rivalry between Basi, Beshte and Makuu's float interesting because the idea of the hippos and the crocodiles being at odds has come up before in the series. I find it interesting that they have some hatred for one another. Makuu was perfect as always. I love him whether he's in his villain phase or his reformed phase. Blair Underwood's performance is really spot on for Makuu. The episode was surprisingly dark, but, exciting with the whole Makuu trying to murder Basi and also Boboka and her son almost drowning in the floodplains. At the end, I enjoyed Fuli and Bupu's dynamic. It's an underrated "child/adult" friendship and is on par with Kion and Ma Tembo's. The jokes were pretty solid in it and I loved the scenery in the Pride Lands in this episode. I loved the more cutesy animals in this episode. The only animals that really annoyed me were the antelopes. I thought Bupu's stubbornness eye-rolling and I didn't like his rudeness. However, I still really love this episode and the antelope became a lot more polite later on. I thought the educational value was really interesting in this episode. I'll give it a 7.5/10 overall.