Sharp stabbing pain
Medical Questions
2013.07.10 22:21 Dvdrummer360 Medical Questions
Having a medical issue? Ask a doctor or medical professional on Reddit! All flaired medical professionals on this subreddit are verified by the mods.
2010.12.23 21:08 theonusta Endo: treatments, stories, support and research into Endometriosis
This community aims to support all people affected by and interested in endometriosis. We pride ourselves on being a friendly, inclusive place, where patients and loved ones alike can discuss thoughts and concerns, ask questions, and share information. Please try to engage with others in an empathetic and supportive manner and remember that Endometriosis is an extremely varied disease and each patient has different circumstances, experiences and treatment options.
2014.04.02 15:29 mortonsneu For anything related to Morton's neuroma
Welcome to Mortons_Neuroma. A Morton's neuroma is a thickening of the tissue around an irritated or damaged nerve leading to your toes. It can result in a sharp, burning pain in the ball of your foot or feel like you are walking on a pebble. Toes may also sting, burn or feel numb. It can be caused by wearing tight, pointy, incorrectly sized or high-heeled shoes, and exacerbated by high impact activities such as running or other activities that place pressure on the feet.
2024.05.17 12:05 Acceptable_Egg5560 Of Giants and Journalists [51 Final]
Thank you for this universe!
And many thanks to for being a full co-writer on this project!
Kaeden and Vichee belongs to and I thank them so much for working with us! It was an honor!
Sven belongs to Bjorn the Copper Paladin from Discord. I hope to do more with them in the future, and have tons of fun!
And don’t you worry about that final in the title! We have some news at the end!
[First]- [Prev]- {Next Story!!}
{Is the reason that everything happened to Tarlim in the first place?}
{Only up to the ramps, mostly. Trying to impress upon people the importance of accessibility for those with extenuating circumstances. At least according to the records I have access to.}
{The average person knows as much about his friends as they do about Mike Collins.}
<...Who?>
{Exactly. 20th century human spaceman, was there for their first lunar landing. Didn’t get to put boots on the ground, and nobody remembers his name now.}
{Hell, I didn’t even know about him until I put in a search query of niche historical figures just to give you an example. Yeesh…}
(Program Selected.)
(Resume Selected Media? [Y])
(Playing…)
Archived Closed Circuit Security Video - Establishment: Exterminator’s Office - Dawn Creek Division - Subbasement - Date Recorded (ST): OCT 31, 2136 - Timeframe (ST): 11:42 - 11:45
The parking bay is silent. Vans are parked neatly in their spots which frame the hallway to the armory and fuel storage for the camera. A ding is heard and something moves in the hallway. Five fully suited Venlil and a Zurulian step out of an elevator and run towards a van. The sound of a door slamming open comes from the hall roughly 6 seconds later. A stream of Exterminators pour out into the hall from the stairwell.
Their voices are indecipherable as they speak over each other. A Sulian runs into the armory and reappears with a huge flamer tank on their back. Another Zurulian can be seen with an extinguisher tank, but a Venlil bleats at them and tosses it aside. They drag the quadrupedal alien quickly into the parking garage before physically throwing them into the back of a van.
From the back of the hallway, a fluid can be seen spreading across the ground. A trio of Venlil back out of a room while holding their flamers up. They are unlit, instead spewing fuel out of their nozzles. The trio twirl around in an overly animated manner as they walk down the hall to the parking garage. A van pulls out of its spot with windows down so the passengers could let out a cheer.
A black-suited Venlil runs up to the spraying trio while waving their arms to get them out into the garage. The microphone just barely manages to catch him saying, “We need to save some for the predators!” One of the other Venlil replies, “Yes sir, Mafchi!” A short flurry of curses is heard as the gathered exterminators pile into the three other visible vans. Two of the vans speed out of the garage, forcing some other Venlil exterminators to dive out of the way in the process.
The black-suited Mafchi picks up a fuel canister that had been dropped and twists off its cap. He slings it under his shoulder and pours a line of fuel. He marches straight to the final van and hops up into the open rear. The van backs itself up to turn out of the garage. The fuel canister clatters to the ground as it pulls away. Before it clears the view of the camera, the Black-suited Venlil is seen standing in its open back. He is holding what appears to be a flare gun.
The flare sails through the air shortly after the van leaves the frame and impacts the ground. It bounces and rolls until it touches the fuel and ignites it in an instant. A small wall of fire proceeds down the provided trail into the hallway, igniting more fuel as time passes. The hallway is quickly engulfed in vividly red fire. Thick black smoke begins to pour out into the garage as the fire inches closer to the primary fuel tank.
Movement can be seen in the hallway between the flickering flames. The silver form of a Venlil Exterminator is seen rushing out of the stairwell and fighting to head towards the fuel storage room. Before they reach, a white flash fills the screen. The feed goes dead, the error code consistent with electrical interruption.
(Specified Media Concluded.)
{Who was what? Mafchi?}
{Hmmm, there aren’t any tags embedded for them. The suits do a rather good job at making the officers anonymous. Let me see…oh.}
{The, uh… the employment records for that Office were…terminated.}
{It looks like…yes, here. Record wipe in 2497. Media with less than 1 bistandannual visit were removed to save space on the university’s central server. It’s…they’re gone, gone gone.}
{Maybe, but that’ll do us no good if we don’t know their name. And because of the chaos of that incident, nobody has been able to accurately reconstruct where every individual was in that office. We’d have to already know who they were to find them.}
<...I guess that’s another person I’ll have to remember then, huh?>
{...Guess so. Speaking of remembering, perhaps you should check out Tarlim’s view again? Seeing how we were just talking about him.}
<...Sure. At least people remember his name, right?>
(Command: [exitprogram])
(Are you sure? [Y])
…
{-Program Selected-}
{-Restart From Last Playback Point? Y/(N)-}
{-[USERID-11229KMD]: procViewHist -}
{-Retrieving Transcription Viewing History…-}
{-List Retrieved - Select Desired Subject: (Tarlim)-}
{-Restart From Last Playback Point? (Y)/N-}
{-Playing…-}
Memory Transcription Subject: Tarlim, the Venbig. Date [Standardized Human Time] October 31st, 2136
No matter how much Sven and Anso griped about it, having them leave and return with the trailer was a great idea. The humans who had gone with them the first time were, to my dismay, excited to try and ride in the back. I had at least been able to impress on those four that I couldn’t let anyone else ride like that, and that they were to help with rigging a trailer with some seats.
I had to admit; they did a good job!
Several couches sat bolted to the floor of the covered trailer and even had some ropes that could be hooked across the armrests as impromptu belts. It wasn’t perfect by any means, but it would work as well as any bus or short train ride! Certainly superior to jumping in the bed of a truck.
I strode out into the parking road and swayed my ears to greet Anso. Sven had stayed behind here to meet with the humans and entertain the kids, a job which he was slightly less unenthusiastic about compared to last time. “Greetings, Anso! Have you made the necessary preparations for the humans to leave with you?”
The Yotul hopped out of the truck bed and bounced to me. “We have! I have to say those humans were great workers to have helped get this whipped up so quickly! I hope Sven has been behaving himself?”
I let my tail wag behind me remembering my last glimpse of him. He should really secure his sheath straps! “He has! Been entertaining the refugees while I made sure they all had their belongings ready to go. Come on inside, let’s go gather them.”
I guided him with a wave of my arm as we turned back to the door. To be truthful, I hadn’t expected Sven to win the humans over as quickly as he did. Needless to say, his primitive attire seemed to spark joy within them, a joy sorely needed amidst the sadness of recency.
As we entered the building I noticed something, or rather, the lack of something. When I had exited only a few [minutes] prior, the building had been full of life and noise. Now, it was almost dead quiet, save for the sounds of a holovision coming from the lobby. Rather heated sounds, at that.
“I didn’t think it was already main rest claw,” Anso mused as he, too, recognized the aggravated voices coming from the lobby. “And what are they watching in there? Sounds…angry.”
“Yeah…” I trailed off as I followed the noises. As I approached the lobby, the sound of what I assumed was a Gojid yelling. “You know nothing about my family. TALK, JUST FUCKING TALK, NOW!” My ears pinned back at the foul language at play, hoping that Sven and the children were somewhere else.
As I entered the room, I saw that I was only half right. The children were thankfully nowhere to be found, but Sven was obviously present, as was most of the facility staff. I was about to ask what was going on before another voice drew my attention to the holovision, the same as everyone else. The voice of none other than Chief Nikonus.
“There were three of us who laid out the groundwork for the Federation. When Kolshian explorers came in contact with the Farsul, more than a thousand years ago, the galaxy was young. We were the first in this sector to escape our gravity well. You know about the founding of this institution, but I reiterate it just in case.”
“The Krakotl were the third,” another voice piped up from behind the camera. I thought it might’ve been another Gojid, but the voice was far too breathy. Harchen, maybe? I wasn’t given a chance to consider it further as Nikonus continued. “Yes, they were a problem from the start; aggressive, disagreeable. We tried to identify the problem, and why they were so ill-equipped for spacefaring.”
“We learned they were scavengers, who would occasionally go for fish as well.”
His next line was rendered inaudible by the shocked gasps of both the refugees and residents in the room. I was no different, drawing in a sharp breath at the abrupt admission. I remembered that Arvi had said some aliens were revealed to have eaten meat in the past, but was this the way it was decided to be revealed? With such abject callousness?
Nikonus continued to speak, looking not just proud, but smug with his words. He went on about how the Federation had saved these aliens with their manipulations, but the entirety of his body language seemed to indicate he reveled in how devastating this information would be to the people he was speaking to. How they manipulated an entire culture, a RELIGION!
What if they did the same to ours?
That horrifying thought struck through my mind like a derailing train. I had relied upon the Tenets in some of my darkest moments. Found comfort in them when there was none elsewhere to be found. To have such a comfort revealed as a lie in its entirety, used only for some other group to control you…
The voice of Nikonus hit my ears again. “Oh Sovlin, I already told you. For the small minority of species who don’t find herbivory alone, we teach them the right way. Doesn’t the religion against predators sound familiar?”
The Kolshian was insufferably proud of those words. There was no doubt in my mind now; this was mocking. Mocking a Gojid for following The Protector. For being a predator. For being different, but expecting to still be treated as a person. The Gojid were predators, they couldn’t help it, and they were already being mocked for it.
What might happen to all the other species?
I shifted my focus away from the screen to the crowd, searching for one in particular. Vichee, a Krakotl already so different from everyone else, and now my concerns for them were multiplied with every word that fell from Nikonus’ mouth. Were they okay? They had come in here to see Sven, I had seen them. Where are-
I spotted Kaeden in the corner of the room. Next to him, slumped against the wall, was Vichee. The dual colored Krakotl’s eyes were glazed over as they stared at nothing. I strode over quickly, my instincts wanting to comfort them. Kaeden was simply standing there, it was confusing that he didn’t seem to be comforting Vichee at all. As I got closer, their head tilted up to me, regarding me with an unfocused eye.
“He was right.” They said quietly. My implant almost didn’t pick it up over the sounds of the lobby. “Kaeden had asked me soon after our first meeting if Krakotl had once been meat eaters. Said it was the shape of our beaks. ‘More suited to capturing small wriggling prey than filtering algae’. He told me. I nearly flew away right then… If I had, I would have been alone with this news.”I listened, kneeling down to be closer to their level. “You’re not alone, your herd is here. Right Kaeden?”
He looked over at me and nodded. “Vichee was there with me when Earth was attacked. I’m here for them now. Kaabra and Venik are… together, elsewhere at the moment. But they will be here too.”
I flicked my ears in understanding. “Then I hope they may help in hugging Vichee until their tears are dry.” I turned an eye to Vichee. “Please, I just want you to know that you are still you. What your body does has no effect on your personhood.”
Vichee still sat, their mind still likely whirling with the new information. They lifted their differently colored wings. “I’m well aware. This lesson I already learned. But thank you, I understand what you mean.” Kaeden nodded slowly and Vichee returned to their thoughts.
“There’s going to be trouble soon, Tarlim,” Kaeden stated gravely. “News like this? Nothing good will come of it. I can already tell this won’t go over well. Keep your eyes open.”
As if in response to his words, the sound of clanking metal hits my ears. They shoot up, pivoting to locate its source. There, dashing towards the door, was the armored figure of Sven. I didn’t know him enough to know how this broadcast would affect him, but running was never the best sign. I flicked my ears goodbye to my friends and rose, following after the metal man. In my periphery, I saw the television screen had shifted to show Rolem moving onto the stage. I would have to miss whatever it was he had to say, so ducked through the doors and continued to follow the sound of metal.
As I exited, I saw that I wasn’t the only one to see Sven’s actions. Anso was bounding behind him, shouting something I couldn’t hear. Sven didn’t seem to either as he kept running, but his gait wasn’t one of fear. He looked purposeful, sprinting in a straight line. A line pointed right towards-
Towards the observing Exterminator Van.
The metal Venlil didn’t even hesitate at the presence of the fence. He leapt up in a display of strength and agility, vaulting over the barrier and continuing his beeline into the van. It was like phased through the doors with how fast he moved. There were sounds of commotion that followed his entry, and soon two Exterminators fell out of the van. One Venlil…and one Krakotl. I wonder how Kalek is taking things.
I, too, cleared the fence with only a high step and reached the van, peering in to see Sven at the controls. “Sven! What are you doing?” I asked, the Krakotl officer shivering on the ground in my periphery.
“They got my girl!” He huffed, “She’s a Gojid, they got her, I can’t let them do anything worse to her!” He tried to activate the vehicle to no avail, but his words brought up something that I hadn’t thought much over. I remember hearing about temporary emplacements that were being set up. Paly had texted me about exterminators bringing people there. Her too. And that would mean-
-THOOOOOOOMMMMM-
The wind hit me like a truck and rocked the van I was standing next to. Sven even stopped trying to fiddle with the controls to see what had just happened. In the distance, near the center of town, an enormous black cloud rose into the air, the vestiges of fire still burning in the suspended embers. I couldn’t look away from it as my mind raced with horrible possibilities as my mind tripped over itself trying to concoct a plan of action.
I wasn’t given long to think before the radio in the van crackled to life, startling both Sven and myself. “Attention all True Exterminators! The truth has come out about the taint in our midst! For too long we have lived with its danger in our presence! If any of you still hold the safety of The Herd in your hearts, come join us so we may burn ALL the predator taint from this District! Rendezvous at Vulen’s apartment complex, we shall start our cleansing there!”
The name of one of my landlords sparked familiarity in my mind. They had been working to build a series of new apartments to add to his old, and if I remembered, had agreed to house the Gojid refugees. The Gojid! Paly was housed with them!!
In an instant, I reached into the van and grabbed Sven by the arm. He tried to pull away, but my grip was too strong. “Sven! They’re gonna kill the Gojid! They’re gonna burn Paly!”
He finally managed to shake himself free as my paws became jittery from stress. “I gotta save my girlfriend! She’s in a facility! I gotta save her!”
“But they’re gonna burn people here!” I protested, “we have to do something! We need- We need People who can fight them! Kaeden! I need to get Kaeden! We can save them!”
I pulled myself away from the van and spotted Anso nearby. He must have had to go through the gate, but this was good timing. I pointed a claw at him. “Do Not Let Him drive off before I get back!”
I didn’t give him, nor the Exterminators who had recovered from their shock, time to ask questions. Paly was in danger, as were who knew how many others. I faintly heard my data pad chime from within my shoulder bag, the signal my heart was beating too fast, but I couldn’t deal with it right now. I could get the heart rate under control during the drive. Right now I needed Kaeden, he knew how to fight! How to save people when others were trying to kill them!
My paws guided me and I was back in the cafeteria before I knew it. Some of the crowd had dissipated, but Kaeden and Vichee were still in the same corner I had left them in, but with their Venlil friends now joined. Without leaving time for protest, I grabbed Kaeden’s arm and pulled him away. I heard Vichee squawk behind me, but I was in too much of a hurry. I can’t let her get hurt. I Won’t.
Kaeden started to slap my arm as I dragged the soldier across the lobby. “Tarlim! What the fuck are you doing?? What’s going on?”
“No time, they’re going to burn everyone,” I breathlessly said as I burst the facility doors open to get him to the van.
“What? Who?” Kaeden questioned, still resisting my pull. I could hear a tinge of worry in his voice, and I knew he would understand. Anso looked back from his position as he heard my approach, and upon seeing me dragging Kaeden along, he grew visibly concerned.
“On the radio, something about True Exterminators,” I attempted to explain to him as we neared the gate doors. This time, I simply spread them apart with my free paw, metal screeching against itself as the gate was forced open. “They’re going to burn every cured species they can find, and That Means Paly. I Won’t Let Them.”
Kaeden had stopped struggling as I explained the bare essentials to him, and once we approached the van, he finally had enough sense to ask the right questions. “So what exactly is the plan to stop them? We’re strong, sure, I could probably take most of them. But just two of us against a wall of those flamers?”
“Not two,” I corrected, letting go of his arm and throwing open the back doors of the van. Still seated in the drivers side was Sven, who looked back once he heard me permit entrance into the back. “We have him too.”
“Wh- the LARPer??” Kaeden asked incredulously. I wasn’t familiar with the term he used, but his tone told us all we needed to know. Sven’s eyes narrowed at the perceived insult, but Kaeden continued. “Do either of you have any formal military training?? Rushing down there is only going to get you both killed along with the others! For fucks sake, slow down! We need a plan!”
“T-There won’t be t-time f-for one,” a voice peeped in from behind us. We all turned to face the source, and we found it was the Venlil Exterminator. They recoiled under the sudden gaze of our entire party, but they managed to continue. “I-I recognized the v-voice. It w-was one of the n-new recruits. They m-might as well be Y-Yulpa. If you w-want to stop them, it’s now or n-never.”
We all stared at them for a moment in disbelief that they’d willingly hand over that information to us. They were Exterminators, weren’t they? They should be allied with the voice on the radio! Kaeden, after considering the information, gave voice to my confusion. “And why are you telling us this? You’re an exterminator, shouldn’t you be trying to help them?”
“M-My husband is the Krakotl that was in the van with me!” They yelled back, stamping their footpaw on the ground in agitation. “I-I don’t care what his ancestors did a t-thousand years ago, I will not stand for those zealots burning who knows how many people! We’re not all the same, h-human!”
I was taken aback by their words. I had given up hope that there were any redeemable souls amongst the ranks of those silver-suited brahkasses, but living proof of the contrary stood before us. Their breathing was only matched by mine as my pad continued to chime in my pack. Maybe there’s hope after all.
Kaeden started frantically looking all around, his focused gaze falling on the facility, the exterminator in front of us, and the rising smoke in the distance. After a moment's hesitation, he growled to himself and shook his head. “Fine! Fucking- if you want to prove you’re different, you and your partner stand guard at the gate! They’ll probably try to send a division here, so keep on guard! And for the love of God, go ask for help if that happens!”
My tail wagged behind me as I interpreted what that meant. “So you’ll help us, Kaeden?”
He paused for a second, an agonizing second as he fully took in the situation in his mind. But ultimately, he nodded. “Let’s go, we can figure things out along the way.”
Seizing the moment, Anso quickly jumped into the van and pushed Sven out of the driver's seat, much to their visible frustration. Kaeden quickly hopped into the passenger seat, leaving me with the problem of finding a space that would fit me. I stepped over to the back of the van and threw the doors open.
The flamers and their fuel tanks were useless to us, easy to toss all three sets out onto the ground behind me. I made sure that the flamers were disabled first, of course. Just had to snap the pilot lighters and slice a hose with my claw. Even if these two said they weren’t like these “True Exterminators” I didn’t trust them one bit. I crawled inside the cramped vehicle and wiggled myself to close the doors behind me.
As I got myself settled, I watched as the Venlil Exterminator started to inspect the destroyed remains of their weapons. I squinted a glare at them and positioned myself so they couldn’t enter with me. “You two aren’t coming,” I hissed. “You know why you’re not. Try anything with the humans, and they will stop you.”
I slammed the doors shut as their expressions fell, just in time for Anso to get the van into gear. I curled myself up against the wall of the van, watching out the back window as we sped down the road. We were on our way now. On our way to save Paly and all the people gathered because their ancestors ate meat. My heart hammered in my chest, but I would need to control it for what we were about to do. I needed to focus. I needed to breathe. I needed to be calm.
Focus. Breathe. Calm
Focus.
Breathe.
Calm…
{-ALERT: Automatic Annotation Detected - Switching Transcription Subject-}
{-Loading…Playback Ready-}
{-Playing…-}
Memory Transcription Subject: Sol-Vah, Fleeing Predator. Date [Standardized Human Time] October 31st, 2136
My legs couldn’t carry me anymore. I had to keep going, but I didn’t have the strength. My pants became wheezes as my body struggled to keep up with the physical exertion of running almost halfway through town. I hadn’t even looked up before now, at least with eyes not blinded by tears. The pain of Mute’s rejection still stung in my soul, a pain so visceral it threatened to rip me apart worse than any Arxur. Protector, what did I do to deserve this? Is there even a Protector, or did the Federation just- just make that up?
I didn’t have time to think about that now, I needed to get to the office. From what little I caught of the broadcast, Nikonus had said they saved us before. I knew what it likely was, but…I was desperate. I just wanted to go back home and have him embrace me like he did before. The safety and love I had felt from him was still fresh in my mind, and if there was any chance I had to get it back?
I’ll happily take it.
As I approached the office, however, something seemed off. I could smell soot in the air, but not the kind of soot that came from our flamers. This was- was…dirtier smelling, as if the fuel had been impure. Upon looking up, however, I saw something that made my stomach drop. A huge plume of smoke, billowing up into the sky. It shadowed the sun itself with its immensity and hate. Did the Exterminators burn more drugs? Or…or…
I felt a renewed vigor as I started to run towards the plume, hoping against hope that I was wrong. As soon as I turned the corner, though, my worst fears were realized. Where the office once stood now sat a burning stack of glorified rubble, every single window in sight shattered and multiple holes in the outer walls. The building was split, it was as if a giant knife had come down and sloppily sliced off its front half to spill flaming debris everywhere.
I stood in front of the building I had once called my home, surrounded by screams and the awful sound of flames roaring. I knew now there was no hope of salvation, no way this could ever be undone. I would never be able to go back to the way things were, never feel the happiness I had for that brief time. I was doomed to this life, abandoned by my love, and forced to live as an abomination devoid of a home.
I suppose that’s all a predator like me deserves.
[First]- [Prev]- {Next Story!!}
You read it right: This is going to be the final chapter of "Of Giants and Journalists." With the conclusion of Sharnet and Vekna's adventure, we will now take the time to show how this announcement has affected our characters and the galaxy at large. We're excited to announce our new series, Nature of a Giant: Aftermath! This series will not be quite as in-depth temporally as Of Giants and Journalists was, mainly because not as much will be happening in as short of a time. Rest assured, though, there will still be plenty of action across the board! You just won't have to deal with over half the story only covering a week of time!
In that vein, we are also excited to announce we are working on another bonus series, one that was teased a long time ago, Venric Lawven: Legal Legend! It will be filling the gap for content while we work on the first few chapters of Aftermath to make sure the scenes are as quality as they deserve, but will have a reduced upload schedule to once a week to accommodate for writing two series at once. On behalf of both of myself and , we'd like to thank all of our readers for sticking with us on this journey. It's hard to believe this series has been going on for over a year in one form or another, but I wouldn't have it any other way! Thank you all again for your continued support, and we look forward to seeing you again with Legal Legends! And then...
The Aftermath!!
submitted by Acceptable_Egg5560 to NatureofPredators [link] [comments]
And many thanks to for being a full co-writer on this project!
Kaeden and Vichee belongs to and I thank them so much for working with us! It was an honor!
Sven belongs to Bjorn the Copper Paladin from Discord. I hope to do more with them in the future, and have tons of fun!
And don’t you worry about that final in the title! We have some news at the end!
[First]- [Prev]- {Next Story!!}
{Is the reason that everything happened to Tarlim in the first place?}
{Only up to the ramps, mostly. Trying to impress upon people the importance of accessibility for those with extenuating circumstances. At least according to the records I have access to.}
{The average person knows as much about his friends as they do about Mike Collins.}
<...Who?>
{Exactly. 20th century human spaceman, was there for their first lunar landing. Didn’t get to put boots on the ground, and nobody remembers his name now.}
{Hell, I didn’t even know about him until I put in a search query of niche historical figures just to give you an example. Yeesh…}
(Program Selected.)
(Resume Selected Media? [Y])
(Playing…)
Archived Closed Circuit Security Video - Establishment: Exterminator’s Office - Dawn Creek Division - Subbasement - Date Recorded (ST): OCT 31, 2136 - Timeframe (ST): 11:42 - 11:45
The parking bay is silent. Vans are parked neatly in their spots which frame the hallway to the armory and fuel storage for the camera. A ding is heard and something moves in the hallway. Five fully suited Venlil and a Zurulian step out of an elevator and run towards a van. The sound of a door slamming open comes from the hall roughly 6 seconds later. A stream of Exterminators pour out into the hall from the stairwell.
Their voices are indecipherable as they speak over each other. A Sulian runs into the armory and reappears with a huge flamer tank on their back. Another Zurulian can be seen with an extinguisher tank, but a Venlil bleats at them and tosses it aside. They drag the quadrupedal alien quickly into the parking garage before physically throwing them into the back of a van.
From the back of the hallway, a fluid can be seen spreading across the ground. A trio of Venlil back out of a room while holding their flamers up. They are unlit, instead spewing fuel out of their nozzles. The trio twirl around in an overly animated manner as they walk down the hall to the parking garage. A van pulls out of its spot with windows down so the passengers could let out a cheer.
A black-suited Venlil runs up to the spraying trio while waving their arms to get them out into the garage. The microphone just barely manages to catch him saying, “We need to save some for the predators!” One of the other Venlil replies, “Yes sir, Mafchi!” A short flurry of curses is heard as the gathered exterminators pile into the three other visible vans. Two of the vans speed out of the garage, forcing some other Venlil exterminators to dive out of the way in the process.
The black-suited Mafchi picks up a fuel canister that had been dropped and twists off its cap. He slings it under his shoulder and pours a line of fuel. He marches straight to the final van and hops up into the open rear. The van backs itself up to turn out of the garage. The fuel canister clatters to the ground as it pulls away. Before it clears the view of the camera, the Black-suited Venlil is seen standing in its open back. He is holding what appears to be a flare gun.
The flare sails through the air shortly after the van leaves the frame and impacts the ground. It bounces and rolls until it touches the fuel and ignites it in an instant. A small wall of fire proceeds down the provided trail into the hallway, igniting more fuel as time passes. The hallway is quickly engulfed in vividly red fire. Thick black smoke begins to pour out into the garage as the fire inches closer to the primary fuel tank.
Movement can be seen in the hallway between the flickering flames. The silver form of a Venlil Exterminator is seen rushing out of the stairwell and fighting to head towards the fuel storage room. Before they reach, a white flash fills the screen. The feed goes dead, the error code consistent with electrical interruption.
(Specified Media Concluded.)
{Who was what? Mafchi?}
{Hmmm, there aren’t any tags embedded for them. The suits do a rather good job at making the officers anonymous. Let me see…oh.}
{The, uh… the employment records for that Office were…terminated.}
{It looks like…yes, here. Record wipe in 2497. Media with less than 1 bistandannual visit were removed to save space on the university’s central server. It’s…they’re gone, gone gone.}
{Maybe, but that’ll do us no good if we don’t know their name. And because of the chaos of that incident, nobody has been able to accurately reconstruct where every individual was in that office. We’d have to already know who they were to find them.}
<...I guess that’s another person I’ll have to remember then, huh?>
{...Guess so. Speaking of remembering, perhaps you should check out Tarlim’s view again? Seeing how we were just talking about him.}
<...Sure. At least people remember his name, right?>
(Command: [exitprogram])
(Are you sure? [Y])
…
{-Program Selected-}
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{-[USERID-11229KMD]: procViewHist -}
{-Retrieving Transcription Viewing History…-}
{-List Retrieved - Select Desired Subject: (Tarlim)-}
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Memory Transcription Subject: Tarlim, the Venbig. Date [Standardized Human Time] October 31st, 2136
No matter how much Sven and Anso griped about it, having them leave and return with the trailer was a great idea. The humans who had gone with them the first time were, to my dismay, excited to try and ride in the back. I had at least been able to impress on those four that I couldn’t let anyone else ride like that, and that they were to help with rigging a trailer with some seats.
I had to admit; they did a good job!
Several couches sat bolted to the floor of the covered trailer and even had some ropes that could be hooked across the armrests as impromptu belts. It wasn’t perfect by any means, but it would work as well as any bus or short train ride! Certainly superior to jumping in the bed of a truck.
I strode out into the parking road and swayed my ears to greet Anso. Sven had stayed behind here to meet with the humans and entertain the kids, a job which he was slightly less unenthusiastic about compared to last time. “Greetings, Anso! Have you made the necessary preparations for the humans to leave with you?”
The Yotul hopped out of the truck bed and bounced to me. “We have! I have to say those humans were great workers to have helped get this whipped up so quickly! I hope Sven has been behaving himself?”
I let my tail wag behind me remembering my last glimpse of him. He should really secure his sheath straps! “He has! Been entertaining the refugees while I made sure they all had their belongings ready to go. Come on inside, let’s go gather them.”
I guided him with a wave of my arm as we turned back to the door. To be truthful, I hadn’t expected Sven to win the humans over as quickly as he did. Needless to say, his primitive attire seemed to spark joy within them, a joy sorely needed amidst the sadness of recency.
As we entered the building I noticed something, or rather, the lack of something. When I had exited only a few [minutes] prior, the building had been full of life and noise. Now, it was almost dead quiet, save for the sounds of a holovision coming from the lobby. Rather heated sounds, at that.
“I didn’t think it was already main rest claw,” Anso mused as he, too, recognized the aggravated voices coming from the lobby. “And what are they watching in there? Sounds…angry.”
“Yeah…” I trailed off as I followed the noises. As I approached the lobby, the sound of what I assumed was a Gojid yelling. “You know nothing about my family. TALK, JUST FUCKING TALK, NOW!” My ears pinned back at the foul language at play, hoping that Sven and the children were somewhere else.
As I entered the room, I saw that I was only half right. The children were thankfully nowhere to be found, but Sven was obviously present, as was most of the facility staff. I was about to ask what was going on before another voice drew my attention to the holovision, the same as everyone else. The voice of none other than Chief Nikonus.
“There were three of us who laid out the groundwork for the Federation. When Kolshian explorers came in contact with the Farsul, more than a thousand years ago, the galaxy was young. We were the first in this sector to escape our gravity well. You know about the founding of this institution, but I reiterate it just in case.”
“The Krakotl were the third,” another voice piped up from behind the camera. I thought it might’ve been another Gojid, but the voice was far too breathy. Harchen, maybe? I wasn’t given a chance to consider it further as Nikonus continued. “Yes, they were a problem from the start; aggressive, disagreeable. We tried to identify the problem, and why they were so ill-equipped for spacefaring.”
“We learned they were scavengers, who would occasionally go for fish as well.”
His next line was rendered inaudible by the shocked gasps of both the refugees and residents in the room. I was no different, drawing in a sharp breath at the abrupt admission. I remembered that Arvi had said some aliens were revealed to have eaten meat in the past, but was this the way it was decided to be revealed? With such abject callousness?
Nikonus continued to speak, looking not just proud, but smug with his words. He went on about how the Federation had saved these aliens with their manipulations, but the entirety of his body language seemed to indicate he reveled in how devastating this information would be to the people he was speaking to. How they manipulated an entire culture, a RELIGION!
What if they did the same to ours?
That horrifying thought struck through my mind like a derailing train. I had relied upon the Tenets in some of my darkest moments. Found comfort in them when there was none elsewhere to be found. To have such a comfort revealed as a lie in its entirety, used only for some other group to control you…
The voice of Nikonus hit my ears again. “Oh Sovlin, I already told you. For the small minority of species who don’t find herbivory alone, we teach them the right way. Doesn’t the religion against predators sound familiar?”
The Kolshian was insufferably proud of those words. There was no doubt in my mind now; this was mocking. Mocking a Gojid for following The Protector. For being a predator. For being different, but expecting to still be treated as a person. The Gojid were predators, they couldn’t help it, and they were already being mocked for it.
What might happen to all the other species?
I shifted my focus away from the screen to the crowd, searching for one in particular. Vichee, a Krakotl already so different from everyone else, and now my concerns for them were multiplied with every word that fell from Nikonus’ mouth. Were they okay? They had come in here to see Sven, I had seen them. Where are-
I spotted Kaeden in the corner of the room. Next to him, slumped against the wall, was Vichee. The dual colored Krakotl’s eyes were glazed over as they stared at nothing. I strode over quickly, my instincts wanting to comfort them. Kaeden was simply standing there, it was confusing that he didn’t seem to be comforting Vichee at all. As I got closer, their head tilted up to me, regarding me with an unfocused eye.
“He was right.” They said quietly. My implant almost didn’t pick it up over the sounds of the lobby. “Kaeden had asked me soon after our first meeting if Krakotl had once been meat eaters. Said it was the shape of our beaks. ‘More suited to capturing small wriggling prey than filtering algae’. He told me. I nearly flew away right then… If I had, I would have been alone with this news.”I listened, kneeling down to be closer to their level. “You’re not alone, your herd is here. Right Kaeden?”
He looked over at me and nodded. “Vichee was there with me when Earth was attacked. I’m here for them now. Kaabra and Venik are… together, elsewhere at the moment. But they will be here too.”
I flicked my ears in understanding. “Then I hope they may help in hugging Vichee until their tears are dry.” I turned an eye to Vichee. “Please, I just want you to know that you are still you. What your body does has no effect on your personhood.”
Vichee still sat, their mind still likely whirling with the new information. They lifted their differently colored wings. “I’m well aware. This lesson I already learned. But thank you, I understand what you mean.” Kaeden nodded slowly and Vichee returned to their thoughts.
“There’s going to be trouble soon, Tarlim,” Kaeden stated gravely. “News like this? Nothing good will come of it. I can already tell this won’t go over well. Keep your eyes open.”
As if in response to his words, the sound of clanking metal hits my ears. They shoot up, pivoting to locate its source. There, dashing towards the door, was the armored figure of Sven. I didn’t know him enough to know how this broadcast would affect him, but running was never the best sign. I flicked my ears goodbye to my friends and rose, following after the metal man. In my periphery, I saw the television screen had shifted to show Rolem moving onto the stage. I would have to miss whatever it was he had to say, so ducked through the doors and continued to follow the sound of metal.
As I exited, I saw that I wasn’t the only one to see Sven’s actions. Anso was bounding behind him, shouting something I couldn’t hear. Sven didn’t seem to either as he kept running, but his gait wasn’t one of fear. He looked purposeful, sprinting in a straight line. A line pointed right towards-
Towards the observing Exterminator Van.
The metal Venlil didn’t even hesitate at the presence of the fence. He leapt up in a display of strength and agility, vaulting over the barrier and continuing his beeline into the van. It was like phased through the doors with how fast he moved. There were sounds of commotion that followed his entry, and soon two Exterminators fell out of the van. One Venlil…and one Krakotl. I wonder how Kalek is taking things.
I, too, cleared the fence with only a high step and reached the van, peering in to see Sven at the controls. “Sven! What are you doing?” I asked, the Krakotl officer shivering on the ground in my periphery.
“They got my girl!” He huffed, “She’s a Gojid, they got her, I can’t let them do anything worse to her!” He tried to activate the vehicle to no avail, but his words brought up something that I hadn’t thought much over. I remember hearing about temporary emplacements that were being set up. Paly had texted me about exterminators bringing people there. Her too. And that would mean-
-THOOOOOOOMMMMM-
The wind hit me like a truck and rocked the van I was standing next to. Sven even stopped trying to fiddle with the controls to see what had just happened. In the distance, near the center of town, an enormous black cloud rose into the air, the vestiges of fire still burning in the suspended embers. I couldn’t look away from it as my mind raced with horrible possibilities as my mind tripped over itself trying to concoct a plan of action.
I wasn’t given long to think before the radio in the van crackled to life, startling both Sven and myself. “Attention all True Exterminators! The truth has come out about the taint in our midst! For too long we have lived with its danger in our presence! If any of you still hold the safety of The Herd in your hearts, come join us so we may burn ALL the predator taint from this District! Rendezvous at Vulen’s apartment complex, we shall start our cleansing there!”
The name of one of my landlords sparked familiarity in my mind. They had been working to build a series of new apartments to add to his old, and if I remembered, had agreed to house the Gojid refugees. The Gojid! Paly was housed with them!!
In an instant, I reached into the van and grabbed Sven by the arm. He tried to pull away, but my grip was too strong. “Sven! They’re gonna kill the Gojid! They’re gonna burn Paly!”
He finally managed to shake himself free as my paws became jittery from stress. “I gotta save my girlfriend! She’s in a facility! I gotta save her!”
“But they’re gonna burn people here!” I protested, “we have to do something! We need- We need People who can fight them! Kaeden! I need to get Kaeden! We can save them!”
I pulled myself away from the van and spotted Anso nearby. He must have had to go through the gate, but this was good timing. I pointed a claw at him. “Do Not Let Him drive off before I get back!”
I didn’t give him, nor the Exterminators who had recovered from their shock, time to ask questions. Paly was in danger, as were who knew how many others. I faintly heard my data pad chime from within my shoulder bag, the signal my heart was beating too fast, but I couldn’t deal with it right now. I could get the heart rate under control during the drive. Right now I needed Kaeden, he knew how to fight! How to save people when others were trying to kill them!
My paws guided me and I was back in the cafeteria before I knew it. Some of the crowd had dissipated, but Kaeden and Vichee were still in the same corner I had left them in, but with their Venlil friends now joined. Without leaving time for protest, I grabbed Kaeden’s arm and pulled him away. I heard Vichee squawk behind me, but I was in too much of a hurry. I can’t let her get hurt. I Won’t.
Kaeden started to slap my arm as I dragged the soldier across the lobby. “Tarlim! What the fuck are you doing?? What’s going on?”
“No time, they’re going to burn everyone,” I breathlessly said as I burst the facility doors open to get him to the van.
“What? Who?” Kaeden questioned, still resisting my pull. I could hear a tinge of worry in his voice, and I knew he would understand. Anso looked back from his position as he heard my approach, and upon seeing me dragging Kaeden along, he grew visibly concerned.
“On the radio, something about True Exterminators,” I attempted to explain to him as we neared the gate doors. This time, I simply spread them apart with my free paw, metal screeching against itself as the gate was forced open. “They’re going to burn every cured species they can find, and That Means Paly. I Won’t Let Them.”
Kaeden had stopped struggling as I explained the bare essentials to him, and once we approached the van, he finally had enough sense to ask the right questions. “So what exactly is the plan to stop them? We’re strong, sure, I could probably take most of them. But just two of us against a wall of those flamers?”
“Not two,” I corrected, letting go of his arm and throwing open the back doors of the van. Still seated in the drivers side was Sven, who looked back once he heard me permit entrance into the back. “We have him too.”
“Wh- the LARPer??” Kaeden asked incredulously. I wasn’t familiar with the term he used, but his tone told us all we needed to know. Sven’s eyes narrowed at the perceived insult, but Kaeden continued. “Do either of you have any formal military training?? Rushing down there is only going to get you both killed along with the others! For fucks sake, slow down! We need a plan!”
“T-There won’t be t-time f-for one,” a voice peeped in from behind us. We all turned to face the source, and we found it was the Venlil Exterminator. They recoiled under the sudden gaze of our entire party, but they managed to continue. “I-I recognized the v-voice. It w-was one of the n-new recruits. They m-might as well be Y-Yulpa. If you w-want to stop them, it’s now or n-never.”
We all stared at them for a moment in disbelief that they’d willingly hand over that information to us. They were Exterminators, weren’t they? They should be allied with the voice on the radio! Kaeden, after considering the information, gave voice to my confusion. “And why are you telling us this? You’re an exterminator, shouldn’t you be trying to help them?”
“M-My husband is the Krakotl that was in the van with me!” They yelled back, stamping their footpaw on the ground in agitation. “I-I don’t care what his ancestors did a t-thousand years ago, I will not stand for those zealots burning who knows how many people! We’re not all the same, h-human!”
I was taken aback by their words. I had given up hope that there were any redeemable souls amongst the ranks of those silver-suited brahkasses, but living proof of the contrary stood before us. Their breathing was only matched by mine as my pad continued to chime in my pack. Maybe there’s hope after all.
Kaeden started frantically looking all around, his focused gaze falling on the facility, the exterminator in front of us, and the rising smoke in the distance. After a moment's hesitation, he growled to himself and shook his head. “Fine! Fucking- if you want to prove you’re different, you and your partner stand guard at the gate! They’ll probably try to send a division here, so keep on guard! And for the love of God, go ask for help if that happens!”
My tail wagged behind me as I interpreted what that meant. “So you’ll help us, Kaeden?”
He paused for a second, an agonizing second as he fully took in the situation in his mind. But ultimately, he nodded. “Let’s go, we can figure things out along the way.”
Seizing the moment, Anso quickly jumped into the van and pushed Sven out of the driver's seat, much to their visible frustration. Kaeden quickly hopped into the passenger seat, leaving me with the problem of finding a space that would fit me. I stepped over to the back of the van and threw the doors open.
The flamers and their fuel tanks were useless to us, easy to toss all three sets out onto the ground behind me. I made sure that the flamers were disabled first, of course. Just had to snap the pilot lighters and slice a hose with my claw. Even if these two said they weren’t like these “True Exterminators” I didn’t trust them one bit. I crawled inside the cramped vehicle and wiggled myself to close the doors behind me.
As I got myself settled, I watched as the Venlil Exterminator started to inspect the destroyed remains of their weapons. I squinted a glare at them and positioned myself so they couldn’t enter with me. “You two aren’t coming,” I hissed. “You know why you’re not. Try anything with the humans, and they will stop you.”
I slammed the doors shut as their expressions fell, just in time for Anso to get the van into gear. I curled myself up against the wall of the van, watching out the back window as we sped down the road. We were on our way now. On our way to save Paly and all the people gathered because their ancestors ate meat. My heart hammered in my chest, but I would need to control it for what we were about to do. I needed to focus. I needed to breathe. I needed to be calm.
Focus. Breathe. Calm
Focus.
Breathe.
Calm…
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Memory Transcription Subject: Sol-Vah, Fleeing Predator. Date [Standardized Human Time] October 31st, 2136
My legs couldn’t carry me anymore. I had to keep going, but I didn’t have the strength. My pants became wheezes as my body struggled to keep up with the physical exertion of running almost halfway through town. I hadn’t even looked up before now, at least with eyes not blinded by tears. The pain of Mute’s rejection still stung in my soul, a pain so visceral it threatened to rip me apart worse than any Arxur. Protector, what did I do to deserve this? Is there even a Protector, or did the Federation just- just make that up?
I didn’t have time to think about that now, I needed to get to the office. From what little I caught of the broadcast, Nikonus had said they saved us before. I knew what it likely was, but…I was desperate. I just wanted to go back home and have him embrace me like he did before. The safety and love I had felt from him was still fresh in my mind, and if there was any chance I had to get it back?
I’ll happily take it.
As I approached the office, however, something seemed off. I could smell soot in the air, but not the kind of soot that came from our flamers. This was- was…dirtier smelling, as if the fuel had been impure. Upon looking up, however, I saw something that made my stomach drop. A huge plume of smoke, billowing up into the sky. It shadowed the sun itself with its immensity and hate. Did the Exterminators burn more drugs? Or…or…
I felt a renewed vigor as I started to run towards the plume, hoping against hope that I was wrong. As soon as I turned the corner, though, my worst fears were realized. Where the office once stood now sat a burning stack of glorified rubble, every single window in sight shattered and multiple holes in the outer walls. The building was split, it was as if a giant knife had come down and sloppily sliced off its front half to spill flaming debris everywhere.
I stood in front of the building I had once called my home, surrounded by screams and the awful sound of flames roaring. I knew now there was no hope of salvation, no way this could ever be undone. I would never be able to go back to the way things were, never feel the happiness I had for that brief time. I was doomed to this life, abandoned by my love, and forced to live as an abomination devoid of a home.
I suppose that’s all a predator like me deserves.
[First]- [Prev]- {Next Story!!}
You read it right: This is going to be the final chapter of "Of Giants and Journalists." With the conclusion of Sharnet and Vekna's adventure, we will now take the time to show how this announcement has affected our characters and the galaxy at large. We're excited to announce our new series, Nature of a Giant: Aftermath! This series will not be quite as in-depth temporally as Of Giants and Journalists was, mainly because not as much will be happening in as short of a time. Rest assured, though, there will still be plenty of action across the board! You just won't have to deal with over half the story only covering a week of time!
In that vein, we are also excited to announce we are working on another bonus series, one that was teased a long time ago, Venric Lawven: Legal Legend! It will be filling the gap for content while we work on the first few chapters of Aftermath to make sure the scenes are as quality as they deserve, but will have a reduced upload schedule to once a week to accommodate for writing two series at once. On behalf of both of myself and , we'd like to thank all of our readers for sticking with us on this journey. It's hard to believe this series has been going on for over a year in one form or another, but I wouldn't have it any other way! Thank you all again for your continued support, and we look forward to seeing you again with Legal Legends! And then...
The Aftermath!!
2024.05.17 11:54 bebepothos Had my first epidural today
And I’m scared shitless now. Because I actually feel better. After 2 1/2 years of failed treatments, millions of appointments, too many medications, and knowing nothing but pain that feels like my entire right side of ribs are all broken, on fire, and being stabbed all at once (CONSTANTLY), I’m scared of the pain relief I’m feeling. I’m scared to get my hopes up that this relief will last anything longer than a day. The most relief I’ve ever had has been for a day, after a 4-hour ketamine infusion. Then the pain returned. And we tried another 4-hour ketamine infusion (which suck ass but I’ll always try literally anything for relief), and even after the second one, the response had diminished. I barely felt any relief for a few hours. I’m so scared to get my hopes up right now, but I’m also trying to be positive and not manifest failure myself. I do understand I’ll likely need them regularly for continued relief. But obviously I can’t get them every day. I’m just desperate for this relief to last like AT LEAST 2 months. I could do this every 2 months (I should add my clinic is 4 hours away so I have to make that trip for any procedure/PM appointment). How do I try to stay positive and manifest success with this treatment when all I’ve known is heartbreaking disappointment? I almost feel medical PTSD. I’m just so terrified to do anything that might magically snap me back into my pain (even though I know that’s not how it works). I’m just worried I’m manifesting my own failure. I have way too much anxiety to have chronic pain, it’s not fair (I’m sure that can be said for many of us lol). Anyways, sorry for the long rant. Any words of support or advice from people who have been in similar situations and/or felt the same conflicting and chaotic feelings would be most welcome 🤍
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2024.05.17 11:53 Mysterious_Cat_1706 Gribble - Chapter 21
New Chapter on every MWF (Monday, Wednesday,Friday)
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Chapter 21: Reborn
Gribble sitting alongside his grandfather, Gorp, at a serene lake nestled in the heart of a lush forest. The gentle lapping of the water against the shore and the melodic chirping of birds create a peaceful atmosphere. Gribble's small, green hands grip a fishing rod, his eyes fixed on the unmoving line, frustration etched across his youthful face as time passes without a single catch. The sun's warm rays dance upon the lake's surface, casting a golden glow on the tranquil scene, yet Gribble remains oblivious to the beauty surrounding him, consumed by his growing impatience.
Gorp, a wise and patient goblin with a wrinkled face and kind, knowing eyes, notices his grandson's mounting frustration and offers a reassuring smile. With a gentle touch, Gorp places his weathered hand on Gribble's shoulder, his presence alone seeming to calm the young goblin's restless spirit. In a voice filled with wisdom and understanding, Gorp imparts a profound piece of advice that will forever shape Gribble's perspective: "Patience, my dear Gribble, is the bridge to success; when coupled with an unwavering belief in oneself, it becomes an unstoppable force, capable of overcoming even the most daunting of challenges."
As these words resonate deep within Gribble's mind, the peaceful scene begins to fade, the colors blurring and the sounds growing distant. The harsh reality of the present situation comes crashing back, and Gribble finds himself torn from the comforting memory, thrust once more into the dangerous reality of the cave and the looming threat of the Thundercat
Gribble lies on the cold, hard ground of the cave, his small body battered and bruised from the Thundercat's relentless assault. The air is thick with the scent of blood and the tang of fear, as Gribble struggles to catch his breath, each inhalation sending shockwaves of pain through his weakened frame. The Thundercat looms over him, its massive form casting a sinister shadow across the cavern floor, its electric blue fur crackling with barely contained energy. The creature's eyes gleam with a predatory hunger, its gaze fixed upon the helpless goblin, as if savoring the moment before delivering the final, fatal blow.
Gribble's heart races, his pulse pounding in his ears like a frantic drum, as he stares into the face of death itself. The Thundercat's hot breath washes over him, carrying with it the stench of primal ferocity and unbridled power. Gribble's own breath comes in short, desperate gasps, his lungs burning with the effort of drawing in the damp, musty air of the cave. The cold tendrils of fear wrap around his soul, threatening to suffocate him with their icy grip, as he confronts the terrifying realization that his life hangs in the balance, dependent upon the whims of the savage creature that towers above him.
In this moment of absolute horror, Gribble's mind races, desperately searching for a way out, for some glimmer of hope amidst the overwhelming darkness. He knows that he must act quickly, that hesitation will surely spell his doom, but his body feels leaden, weighed down by the burden of his injuries and the paralyzing fear that grips his heart.
In a last-ditch effort to save himself from the Thundercat's impending attack, Gribble musters the remnants of his strength, drawing upon the very last reserves of his power. He calls out to the earth, seeking to summon the dormant life that lies beneath the cave floor, hoping against hope that his earth vine powers will answer his desperate plea. Gribble's mind races as he focuses all of his energy on this single, crucial task, his brow furrowed in concentration, his eyes squeezed shut as he wills the vines to burst forth from the unyielding ground.
The thick green vine is sluggish in its movements, its progress hindered by the unnatural environment of the cave, but still, it inches forward, guided by Gribble's unwavering determination.
Gribble's heart leaps with a sudden surge of hope as he watches the vine snake its way towards the Thundercat, a small, defiant spark igniting within his chest. He knows that this is his only chance, that the success of his plan hinges upon the strength and speed of the vine, and he pours every last ounce of his will into the endeavor. The vine quivers and strains, as if struggling against an invisible barrier, but Gribble refuses to yield, his mind locked in a silent battle of wills with the very earth itself.
As Gribble watches the vine's sluggish progress, a sudden flash of inspiration illuminates his mind, and a daring plan takes shape. With renewed focus and determination, he directs the vine's growth, shaping and molding it with his earth magic, willing it to take on a new, more deadly form. Slowly, the tender green tendril begins to elongate and narrow, its tip sharpening into a wicked point, until it resembles a crude but effective spear, poised to strike at the heart of the Thundercat.
Gribble's eyes narrow as he concentrates on the newly-formed vine spear, his body trembling with the effort of maintaining his mental grip on the volatile plant matter. The spear quivers in the air, its tip aimed squarely at the Thundercat's broad, muscular chest, as if seeking out the creature's vital organs with a hunter's precision. Gribble's breathing grows shallow and rapid, his heart pounding against his ribcage as he prepares to unleash the improvised weapon, knowing that this single strike may well determine the outcome of the battle, and perhaps, the very course of his life.
With a final, desperate surge of energy, Gribble thrusts his hand forward, his fingers splayed wide as he channels every last ounce of his power into the vine spear. Time seems to slow to a crawl as Gribble watches the spear's progress, his heart in his throat, his eyes wide with a mixture of hope and fear, as he silently prays for the success of his gambit
The vine spear’s sharpened tip finding its mark with a sickening thud as it pierces the Thundercat's muscular chest. The creature lets out a deafening roar of pain and surprise, its voice reverberating through the cave like a clap of thunder, as it staggers backward, its electric blue fur standing on end. The Thundercat's eyes widen in shock and disbelief, its gaze fixed upon the slender green tendril that protrudes from its body, as if struggling to comprehend the reality of its own vulnerability.
Gribble watches in stunned amazement as the mighty Thundercat, the very embodiment of primal power and ferocity, begins to falter, its movements growing sluggish and uncoordinated. The creature's massive frame shudders and convulses, its muscles rippling beneath its fur as it fights to remove the vine. The Thundercat's breaths come in short, ragged gasps, its eyes growing dim and unfocused as the life slowly drains from its body, until at last, it collapses to the ground, a final, shuddering sigh escaping its lips.
The cave falls silent, the only sound the steady patter of the rain outside and Gribble's own labored breathing, as he struggles to come to terms with the magnitude of his victory. He stares at the Thundercat's lifeless form, scarcely daring to believe that he, a small, unassuming goblin, could have felled such a formidable beast. A mixture of relief and exhaustion washes over Gribble, his limbs trembling with the aftershocks of the intense battle, as he slowly begins to process the implications of his triumph.
Gribble crawls towards the fallen Thundercat, his movements slow and painful, each breath sending a fresh wave of agony through his battered body. As he nears the creature's lifeless form, an inexplicable urge takes hold of him, a primal desire that he can neither explain nor resist. Before he can question the impulse, Gribble finds himself drawn to the Thundercat's still-warm chest, his hands moving of their own accord as they seek out the beast's most vital organ.
With trembling fingers, Gribble carefully parts the Thundercat's thick fur, revealing the smooth, blue skin beneath. He hesitates for a moment, his mind reeling at the thought of what he is about to do, but the compulsion proves too strong to ignore. With a deep breath and a quick, decisive movement, Gribble plunges his hand into the Thundercat's chest, his fingers closing around the creature's still-beating heart. The organ pulses in his grasp, its rhythm slowing as he carefully extracts it from the Thundercat's body, a faint crackle of residual electricity dancing across its surface.
Gribble brings the heart to his lips, his eyes wide with a mixture of fear and anticipation, as he contemplates the enormity of the act he is about to commit. The coppery scent of blood fills his nostrils, mingling with the damp, earthy smell of the cave, as he parts his lips and takes a tentative bite of the Thundercat's essence. The taste is overwhelming, a flood of rich, primal flavors that dance upon his tongue, setting his senses alight with a rush of power and vitality unlike anything he has ever experienced. The world narrows to a single, focus point, as if the universe itself is holding its breath, waiting to see what awestriking abilities Gribble will gain from this bold act of consumption.
As Gribble swallows the last morsel of the Thundercat's heart, an electrifying surge of power courses through his veins, setting every nerve ending alight with a tingling, almost painful sensation. The goblin's small frame begins to tremble and convulse, his muscles twitching and spasming as the creature's essence merges with his own life force. Gribble gasps as he feels his body start to change, subtle shifts taking place throughout his musculature and skeleton that quickly escalate into all-consuming physical transformations as the potent powers from the heart take hold.
Gribble's once small, wiry muscles begin to bulge and swell, expanding with newfound strength and vitality, as if the Thundercat's raw power is being transmuted directly into his own cells and sinews. His scrawny limbs thicken and lengthen, the sudden growth of his body accompanied by shooting pains and cramps, as he undergoes an accelerated metamorphosis. The goblin's stature increases rapidly, his height multiplying at an astonishing rate, until he towers over his former self, a new, imposing figure of raw power and potential.
But the changes do not stop with his musculature alone. Gribble's senses sharpen to a degree he would never have thought possible, his eyes able to penetrate the thick darkness of the cave without hindrance, every detail of his surroundings now clear and sharp as if bathed in the bright light of day. The goblin's ears twitch and thrum with a newfound sensitivity, able to pick up the tiniest sounds and vibrations from the depths of the cave. Most astonishing of all, sparks of brilliant blue electricity emerge through the hairs on Gribble's arms, dancing and pulsing with a life force that both fascinates and terrifies him. He has been reborn, a product of the powers that now surge within, his body and mind irrevocably altered by the essence of the Thundercat.
As the initial shock of the transformation begins to subside, Gribble becomes aware of a soothing warmth spreading throughout his body, a sensation that stands in stark contrast to the pain and exhaustion that had plagued him mere moments before. The goblin looks down at his battered and bruised form, his eyes widening in astonishment as he watches the myriad wounds and gashes that mar his skin begin to knit together before his very eyes, the flesh mending itself at an impossible rate.
Deep lacerations seal shut, leaving behind only faint, silvery scars that quickly fade into nothingness, as if erased by an unseen hand. Ugly purple bruises that had blossomed across Gribble's body, testaments to the savage beating he had endured at the claws and fangs of the Thundercat, now rapidly diminish in size and color, until they vanish entirely, leaving his skin unmarked and pristine. Even the bone-deep aches and pains that had settled into Gribble's joints and muscles dissipate, replaced by a newfound sense of strength and vitality that courses through his veins like liquid fire.
As the healing process nears its completion, Gribble slowly rises to his feet, marveling at the ease with which he can now move, his body no longer weighed down by the burdens of injury and fatigue. He flexes his fingers experimentally, feeling the raw power that thrums just beneath the surface of his skin, a barely contained energy that whispers tantalizing of limitless potential. A sense of invincibility washes over the goblin, the knowledge that he has not only survived the brutal encounter with the Thundercat but emerged stronger and more powerful than ever before. Gribble's gaze hardens with a newfound sense of purpose, steadied by the certainty that he can now overcome any obstacle that dares to stand in his path.
Even as Gribble revels in the rush of power and the exhilaration of his miraculous recovery, a faint shadow begins to creep across the edges of his consciousness, an unsettling presence that lurks just beyond the reach of his newfound senses. It is a darkness that seems to emanate from deep within his own being, a nebulous entity that tugs at the corner of his thoughts, whispering of hidden costs and unspoken dangers.
The goblin tries to shake off the growing sense of unease, pushing the troubling thoughts aside as he focuses instead on the incredible changes that have taken place within his body, marveling at the raw strength and vitality that now course through his veins. Yet, even as he seeks to bask in the glow of his transformation, the darkness persists, hovering at the edge of his awareness like a silent, watchful specter.
As Gribble moves through the cave, his steps imbued with newfound purpose and power, he cannot escape the nagging feeling that something fundamental has shifted within him, a subtle alteration that goes beyond the physical changes he has undergone. It is as if the essence of the Thundercat, now intertwined with his own lifeforce, has brought with it a touch of something primal and untamed, a wildness that threatens to consume him from within. The goblin's heart begins to race, a sense of trepidation rising in his chest as he ponders the implications of this strange, unsettling presence, wondering what price he may ultimately pay for the powers he has so eagerly embraced.
Driven by an instinctive need to escape the confines of the cave and the lingering presence of the fallen Thundercat, Gribble makes his way towards the entrance, his steps steady and purposeful, imbued with a newfound sense of strength and determination. As he nears the mouth of the cave, the sound of the pouring rain grows louder, the steady patter of droplets against stone echoing through the cavernous space like a ghostly drumbeat.
Gribble steps out into the downpour, his body immediately assaulted by the cold, stinging droplets that fall from the sky in an unrelenting torrent. The water sluices over his skin, running in rivulets through his hair and down his face, yet the goblin barely registers the sensation, his body thrumming with the power of the Thundercat, the electricity that courses through his veins keeping him warm and insulated against the chill of the rain.
He tilts his face upwards, his eyes closed as he allows the water to wash over him, a silent, almost meditative gesture that speaks of a desperate need for cleansing and renewal. The rain beats down upon Gribble's body, as if seeking to purge him of the darkness that has taken root within his soul, to wash away the lingering traces of the Thundercat's essence that now mingle with his own. Yet, even as the water pours over him in an unending stream, the goblin knows that some stains are too deep to be cleansed by mere rain alone, that the changes that have been wrought within him are irrevocable and permanent.
As Gribble stands there in the pouring rain, he catches a glimpse of his reflection in a nearby puddle, the image distorted and rippling with each falling droplet. The face that stares back at him is at once familiar and utterly alien, a strange amalgamation of the goblin he once was and the creature he has become. Gone is the scrawny, unassuming figure that had entered the cave, replaced now by a being of raw power and untamed potential.
Gribble's once wiry frame is now corded with muscle, his body honed and sculpted by the Thundercat's essence, every sinew and fiber imbued with a strength that defies belief. His eyes, once a dull, unremarkable shade, now glint with a predatory intensity, the pupils narrowed to vertical slits that seem to pierce the very darkness itself. The goblin's skin, too, has undergone a transformation, the surface now alive with tiny bolts of blue electricity that dance and crackle with each movement, a testament to the power that flows through his veins.
As he stares at his altered reflection, Gribble is struck by the realization that he is no longer the same goblin he was before, that the experiences he has undergone and the powers he has absorbed have changed him in ways that go far beyond the physical. He senses a new hardness within himself, a steely resolve that was absent before, tempered by the trials he has faced and the darkness he has embraced. The goblin knows that he has crossed a threshold, stepped into a realm of power and potential that few of his kind have ever dared to tread, and that there can be no turning back from the path he has chosen.
As the initial rush of adrenaline and euphoria begins to fade, Gribble is struck by a profound and unsettling realization, a truth that settles over him like a leaden weight upon his soul. The powers he now possesses, the incredible abilities granted to him by the consumption of the Thundercat's heart, have come at a terrible cost, a price that he is only now beginning to comprehend.
Gribble senses that a part of himself has been lost, consumed by the very darkness that now resides within him, a fundamental piece of his being that has been forever altered by the merging of his essence with that of the Thundercat. It is as if a shadow has fallen over his spirit, a veil of darkness that threatens to engulf the very core of his identity, to erode the values and beliefs that once defined him.
The goblin's mind reels as he ponders the implications of this realization, the knowledge that he has willingly embraced a power that may ultimately consume him, body and soul. He wonders what challenges lie ahead, what trials he will face as he navigates this new and uncharted realm of existence, and whether the strength he has gained will be enough to see him through the darkness that surely awaits.
As Gribble stands there in the pouring rain, his body thrumming with power, his mind haunted by the specter of an uncertain future, he knows that he has set foot upon a path from which there can be no retreat. The goblin steels himself, his jaw set with grim determination, as he prepares to embark upon a journey that will test the very limits of his newfound abilities, and perhaps, the very essence of his being. With a final, lingering glance at the cave that has borne witness to his transformation, Gribble turns his face to the storm and steps forward into the unknown, ready to embrace the challenges and dangers that lie ahead.
submitted by Mysterious_Cat_1706 to HFY [link] [comments]
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Chapter 21: Reborn
Gribble sitting alongside his grandfather, Gorp, at a serene lake nestled in the heart of a lush forest. The gentle lapping of the water against the shore and the melodic chirping of birds create a peaceful atmosphere. Gribble's small, green hands grip a fishing rod, his eyes fixed on the unmoving line, frustration etched across his youthful face as time passes without a single catch. The sun's warm rays dance upon the lake's surface, casting a golden glow on the tranquil scene, yet Gribble remains oblivious to the beauty surrounding him, consumed by his growing impatience.
Gorp, a wise and patient goblin with a wrinkled face and kind, knowing eyes, notices his grandson's mounting frustration and offers a reassuring smile. With a gentle touch, Gorp places his weathered hand on Gribble's shoulder, his presence alone seeming to calm the young goblin's restless spirit. In a voice filled with wisdom and understanding, Gorp imparts a profound piece of advice that will forever shape Gribble's perspective: "Patience, my dear Gribble, is the bridge to success; when coupled with an unwavering belief in oneself, it becomes an unstoppable force, capable of overcoming even the most daunting of challenges."
As these words resonate deep within Gribble's mind, the peaceful scene begins to fade, the colors blurring and the sounds growing distant. The harsh reality of the present situation comes crashing back, and Gribble finds himself torn from the comforting memory, thrust once more into the dangerous reality of the cave and the looming threat of the Thundercat
Gribble lies on the cold, hard ground of the cave, his small body battered and bruised from the Thundercat's relentless assault. The air is thick with the scent of blood and the tang of fear, as Gribble struggles to catch his breath, each inhalation sending shockwaves of pain through his weakened frame. The Thundercat looms over him, its massive form casting a sinister shadow across the cavern floor, its electric blue fur crackling with barely contained energy. The creature's eyes gleam with a predatory hunger, its gaze fixed upon the helpless goblin, as if savoring the moment before delivering the final, fatal blow.
Gribble's heart races, his pulse pounding in his ears like a frantic drum, as he stares into the face of death itself. The Thundercat's hot breath washes over him, carrying with it the stench of primal ferocity and unbridled power. Gribble's own breath comes in short, desperate gasps, his lungs burning with the effort of drawing in the damp, musty air of the cave. The cold tendrils of fear wrap around his soul, threatening to suffocate him with their icy grip, as he confronts the terrifying realization that his life hangs in the balance, dependent upon the whims of the savage creature that towers above him.
In this moment of absolute horror, Gribble's mind races, desperately searching for a way out, for some glimmer of hope amidst the overwhelming darkness. He knows that he must act quickly, that hesitation will surely spell his doom, but his body feels leaden, weighed down by the burden of his injuries and the paralyzing fear that grips his heart.
In a last-ditch effort to save himself from the Thundercat's impending attack, Gribble musters the remnants of his strength, drawing upon the very last reserves of his power. He calls out to the earth, seeking to summon the dormant life that lies beneath the cave floor, hoping against hope that his earth vine powers will answer his desperate plea. Gribble's mind races as he focuses all of his energy on this single, crucial task, his brow furrowed in concentration, his eyes squeezed shut as he wills the vines to burst forth from the unyielding ground.
The thick green vine is sluggish in its movements, its progress hindered by the unnatural environment of the cave, but still, it inches forward, guided by Gribble's unwavering determination.
Gribble's heart leaps with a sudden surge of hope as he watches the vine snake its way towards the Thundercat, a small, defiant spark igniting within his chest. He knows that this is his only chance, that the success of his plan hinges upon the strength and speed of the vine, and he pours every last ounce of his will into the endeavor. The vine quivers and strains, as if struggling against an invisible barrier, but Gribble refuses to yield, his mind locked in a silent battle of wills with the very earth itself.
As Gribble watches the vine's sluggish progress, a sudden flash of inspiration illuminates his mind, and a daring plan takes shape. With renewed focus and determination, he directs the vine's growth, shaping and molding it with his earth magic, willing it to take on a new, more deadly form. Slowly, the tender green tendril begins to elongate and narrow, its tip sharpening into a wicked point, until it resembles a crude but effective spear, poised to strike at the heart of the Thundercat.
Gribble's eyes narrow as he concentrates on the newly-formed vine spear, his body trembling with the effort of maintaining his mental grip on the volatile plant matter. The spear quivers in the air, its tip aimed squarely at the Thundercat's broad, muscular chest, as if seeking out the creature's vital organs with a hunter's precision. Gribble's breathing grows shallow and rapid, his heart pounding against his ribcage as he prepares to unleash the improvised weapon, knowing that this single strike may well determine the outcome of the battle, and perhaps, the very course of his life.
With a final, desperate surge of energy, Gribble thrusts his hand forward, his fingers splayed wide as he channels every last ounce of his power into the vine spear. Time seems to slow to a crawl as Gribble watches the spear's progress, his heart in his throat, his eyes wide with a mixture of hope and fear, as he silently prays for the success of his gambit
The vine spear’s sharpened tip finding its mark with a sickening thud as it pierces the Thundercat's muscular chest. The creature lets out a deafening roar of pain and surprise, its voice reverberating through the cave like a clap of thunder, as it staggers backward, its electric blue fur standing on end. The Thundercat's eyes widen in shock and disbelief, its gaze fixed upon the slender green tendril that protrudes from its body, as if struggling to comprehend the reality of its own vulnerability.
Gribble watches in stunned amazement as the mighty Thundercat, the very embodiment of primal power and ferocity, begins to falter, its movements growing sluggish and uncoordinated. The creature's massive frame shudders and convulses, its muscles rippling beneath its fur as it fights to remove the vine. The Thundercat's breaths come in short, ragged gasps, its eyes growing dim and unfocused as the life slowly drains from its body, until at last, it collapses to the ground, a final, shuddering sigh escaping its lips.
The cave falls silent, the only sound the steady patter of the rain outside and Gribble's own labored breathing, as he struggles to come to terms with the magnitude of his victory. He stares at the Thundercat's lifeless form, scarcely daring to believe that he, a small, unassuming goblin, could have felled such a formidable beast. A mixture of relief and exhaustion washes over Gribble, his limbs trembling with the aftershocks of the intense battle, as he slowly begins to process the implications of his triumph.
Gribble crawls towards the fallen Thundercat, his movements slow and painful, each breath sending a fresh wave of agony through his battered body. As he nears the creature's lifeless form, an inexplicable urge takes hold of him, a primal desire that he can neither explain nor resist. Before he can question the impulse, Gribble finds himself drawn to the Thundercat's still-warm chest, his hands moving of their own accord as they seek out the beast's most vital organ.
With trembling fingers, Gribble carefully parts the Thundercat's thick fur, revealing the smooth, blue skin beneath. He hesitates for a moment, his mind reeling at the thought of what he is about to do, but the compulsion proves too strong to ignore. With a deep breath and a quick, decisive movement, Gribble plunges his hand into the Thundercat's chest, his fingers closing around the creature's still-beating heart. The organ pulses in his grasp, its rhythm slowing as he carefully extracts it from the Thundercat's body, a faint crackle of residual electricity dancing across its surface.
Gribble brings the heart to his lips, his eyes wide with a mixture of fear and anticipation, as he contemplates the enormity of the act he is about to commit. The coppery scent of blood fills his nostrils, mingling with the damp, earthy smell of the cave, as he parts his lips and takes a tentative bite of the Thundercat's essence. The taste is overwhelming, a flood of rich, primal flavors that dance upon his tongue, setting his senses alight with a rush of power and vitality unlike anything he has ever experienced. The world narrows to a single, focus point, as if the universe itself is holding its breath, waiting to see what awestriking abilities Gribble will gain from this bold act of consumption.
As Gribble swallows the last morsel of the Thundercat's heart, an electrifying surge of power courses through his veins, setting every nerve ending alight with a tingling, almost painful sensation. The goblin's small frame begins to tremble and convulse, his muscles twitching and spasming as the creature's essence merges with his own life force. Gribble gasps as he feels his body start to change, subtle shifts taking place throughout his musculature and skeleton that quickly escalate into all-consuming physical transformations as the potent powers from the heart take hold.
Gribble's once small, wiry muscles begin to bulge and swell, expanding with newfound strength and vitality, as if the Thundercat's raw power is being transmuted directly into his own cells and sinews. His scrawny limbs thicken and lengthen, the sudden growth of his body accompanied by shooting pains and cramps, as he undergoes an accelerated metamorphosis. The goblin's stature increases rapidly, his height multiplying at an astonishing rate, until he towers over his former self, a new, imposing figure of raw power and potential.
But the changes do not stop with his musculature alone. Gribble's senses sharpen to a degree he would never have thought possible, his eyes able to penetrate the thick darkness of the cave without hindrance, every detail of his surroundings now clear and sharp as if bathed in the bright light of day. The goblin's ears twitch and thrum with a newfound sensitivity, able to pick up the tiniest sounds and vibrations from the depths of the cave. Most astonishing of all, sparks of brilliant blue electricity emerge through the hairs on Gribble's arms, dancing and pulsing with a life force that both fascinates and terrifies him. He has been reborn, a product of the powers that now surge within, his body and mind irrevocably altered by the essence of the Thundercat.
As the initial shock of the transformation begins to subside, Gribble becomes aware of a soothing warmth spreading throughout his body, a sensation that stands in stark contrast to the pain and exhaustion that had plagued him mere moments before. The goblin looks down at his battered and bruised form, his eyes widening in astonishment as he watches the myriad wounds and gashes that mar his skin begin to knit together before his very eyes, the flesh mending itself at an impossible rate.
Deep lacerations seal shut, leaving behind only faint, silvery scars that quickly fade into nothingness, as if erased by an unseen hand. Ugly purple bruises that had blossomed across Gribble's body, testaments to the savage beating he had endured at the claws and fangs of the Thundercat, now rapidly diminish in size and color, until they vanish entirely, leaving his skin unmarked and pristine. Even the bone-deep aches and pains that had settled into Gribble's joints and muscles dissipate, replaced by a newfound sense of strength and vitality that courses through his veins like liquid fire.
As the healing process nears its completion, Gribble slowly rises to his feet, marveling at the ease with which he can now move, his body no longer weighed down by the burdens of injury and fatigue. He flexes his fingers experimentally, feeling the raw power that thrums just beneath the surface of his skin, a barely contained energy that whispers tantalizing of limitless potential. A sense of invincibility washes over the goblin, the knowledge that he has not only survived the brutal encounter with the Thundercat but emerged stronger and more powerful than ever before. Gribble's gaze hardens with a newfound sense of purpose, steadied by the certainty that he can now overcome any obstacle that dares to stand in his path.
Even as Gribble revels in the rush of power and the exhilaration of his miraculous recovery, a faint shadow begins to creep across the edges of his consciousness, an unsettling presence that lurks just beyond the reach of his newfound senses. It is a darkness that seems to emanate from deep within his own being, a nebulous entity that tugs at the corner of his thoughts, whispering of hidden costs and unspoken dangers.
The goblin tries to shake off the growing sense of unease, pushing the troubling thoughts aside as he focuses instead on the incredible changes that have taken place within his body, marveling at the raw strength and vitality that now course through his veins. Yet, even as he seeks to bask in the glow of his transformation, the darkness persists, hovering at the edge of his awareness like a silent, watchful specter.
As Gribble moves through the cave, his steps imbued with newfound purpose and power, he cannot escape the nagging feeling that something fundamental has shifted within him, a subtle alteration that goes beyond the physical changes he has undergone. It is as if the essence of the Thundercat, now intertwined with his own lifeforce, has brought with it a touch of something primal and untamed, a wildness that threatens to consume him from within. The goblin's heart begins to race, a sense of trepidation rising in his chest as he ponders the implications of this strange, unsettling presence, wondering what price he may ultimately pay for the powers he has so eagerly embraced.
Driven by an instinctive need to escape the confines of the cave and the lingering presence of the fallen Thundercat, Gribble makes his way towards the entrance, his steps steady and purposeful, imbued with a newfound sense of strength and determination. As he nears the mouth of the cave, the sound of the pouring rain grows louder, the steady patter of droplets against stone echoing through the cavernous space like a ghostly drumbeat.
Gribble steps out into the downpour, his body immediately assaulted by the cold, stinging droplets that fall from the sky in an unrelenting torrent. The water sluices over his skin, running in rivulets through his hair and down his face, yet the goblin barely registers the sensation, his body thrumming with the power of the Thundercat, the electricity that courses through his veins keeping him warm and insulated against the chill of the rain.
He tilts his face upwards, his eyes closed as he allows the water to wash over him, a silent, almost meditative gesture that speaks of a desperate need for cleansing and renewal. The rain beats down upon Gribble's body, as if seeking to purge him of the darkness that has taken root within his soul, to wash away the lingering traces of the Thundercat's essence that now mingle with his own. Yet, even as the water pours over him in an unending stream, the goblin knows that some stains are too deep to be cleansed by mere rain alone, that the changes that have been wrought within him are irrevocable and permanent.
As Gribble stands there in the pouring rain, he catches a glimpse of his reflection in a nearby puddle, the image distorted and rippling with each falling droplet. The face that stares back at him is at once familiar and utterly alien, a strange amalgamation of the goblin he once was and the creature he has become. Gone is the scrawny, unassuming figure that had entered the cave, replaced now by a being of raw power and untamed potential.
Gribble's once wiry frame is now corded with muscle, his body honed and sculpted by the Thundercat's essence, every sinew and fiber imbued with a strength that defies belief. His eyes, once a dull, unremarkable shade, now glint with a predatory intensity, the pupils narrowed to vertical slits that seem to pierce the very darkness itself. The goblin's skin, too, has undergone a transformation, the surface now alive with tiny bolts of blue electricity that dance and crackle with each movement, a testament to the power that flows through his veins.
As he stares at his altered reflection, Gribble is struck by the realization that he is no longer the same goblin he was before, that the experiences he has undergone and the powers he has absorbed have changed him in ways that go far beyond the physical. He senses a new hardness within himself, a steely resolve that was absent before, tempered by the trials he has faced and the darkness he has embraced. The goblin knows that he has crossed a threshold, stepped into a realm of power and potential that few of his kind have ever dared to tread, and that there can be no turning back from the path he has chosen.
As the initial rush of adrenaline and euphoria begins to fade, Gribble is struck by a profound and unsettling realization, a truth that settles over him like a leaden weight upon his soul. The powers he now possesses, the incredible abilities granted to him by the consumption of the Thundercat's heart, have come at a terrible cost, a price that he is only now beginning to comprehend.
Gribble senses that a part of himself has been lost, consumed by the very darkness that now resides within him, a fundamental piece of his being that has been forever altered by the merging of his essence with that of the Thundercat. It is as if a shadow has fallen over his spirit, a veil of darkness that threatens to engulf the very core of his identity, to erode the values and beliefs that once defined him.
The goblin's mind reels as he ponders the implications of this realization, the knowledge that he has willingly embraced a power that may ultimately consume him, body and soul. He wonders what challenges lie ahead, what trials he will face as he navigates this new and uncharted realm of existence, and whether the strength he has gained will be enough to see him through the darkness that surely awaits.
As Gribble stands there in the pouring rain, his body thrumming with power, his mind haunted by the specter of an uncertain future, he knows that he has set foot upon a path from which there can be no retreat. The goblin steels himself, his jaw set with grim determination, as he prepares to embark upon a journey that will test the very limits of his newfound abilities, and perhaps, the very essence of his being. With a final, lingering glance at the cave that has borne witness to his transformation, Gribble turns his face to the storm and steps forward into the unknown, ready to embrace the challenges and dangers that lie ahead.
2024.05.17 11:42 Ngmw Toe pain/creaking
23m Every few weeks/months my big toe on my right foot will just start killing. It’s only when I wear shoes that it starts and it doesn’t matter which shoe they all hurt. It hurts when I walk and lift my foot and it’s an extremely sharp pain starting in the knuckle of my big toe and shooting up the tendon to my ankle. It was doing alright for a while but I’m currently on vacation with lots of walking and it’s started again. Now my foot is creaking whenever I move my toe up or down and it’s really sore on the top of my foot. The creaking is coming from that tendon and it’s closer to my ankle than it is my toe. It’s been 3-5 days so far and the pain is subsiding but the creaking is getting worse especially when I’m cold. At first I thought it may be an early case if gout being that my grandpa had a pretty severe case in his feet and ankles but I’m starting to think that isn’t it. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!!
submitted by Ngmw to AskDocs [link] [comments]
2024.05.17 11:35 m4hunk “Detaching” and “attaching” sensation of a part of my belly when contracting the abdominal muscles after sneezes
27M. Height: 1.85M. Race: white. Primary complaint: sharp pain when sneezing and/or contracting abdomen. Durantion: 2 days. I dont drink, smoke, nor use any drugs.
I sneezed several times with my belly hitting the belt of my pants yesterday and then during the night when I went to exercise, I felt this sensation of this small part of my belly “detaching and attaching” or moving when exercising and now it is painful to the touch and when I contract the muscle, and I feel sharp pain when I sneeze. What can it be? Muscle strain?
submitted by m4hunk to AskDocs [link] [comments]
I sneezed several times with my belly hitting the belt of my pants yesterday and then during the night when I went to exercise, I felt this sensation of this small part of my belly “detaching and attaching” or moving when exercising and now it is painful to the touch and when I contract the muscle, and I feel sharp pain when I sneeze. What can it be? Muscle strain?
2024.05.17 11:32 sadlerortho01 Why Must You Choose Invisalign Clear Aligners in Richmond
Do you intend to undergo Invisalign treatment? Discover some of the advantages of choosing this teeth-straightening procedure by reading on. As per the Richmond Dental Association, getting your teeth straightened might be beneficial for your oral health in general and not simply for aesthetic reasons. Technology has advanced to the point where discrete methods like Invisalign clear aligners in Richmond may efficiently straighten misaligned teeth, even if traditional metal braces are still often utilized.
Benefits of receiving Invisalign clear aligners treatment in Fishers
Many people who want to get their crooked teeth straightened feel self-conscious about how they look. Dental problems like overbites, underbites, and crooked teeth can harm a person's self-esteem and sense of beauty. Conversely, there are many more reasons why straightening the teeth is important than just making them seem better. Untreated crooked teeth might result in severe dental issues. Some advantages of selecting Invisalign for teeth straightening include the following:
1. They feel at ease
It is more comfortable to use Invisalign aligners than traditional braces. Traditional metal brackets' sharp edges can cause painful sores that take a long time to cure as well as damage to the soft oral tissues. The removable aligners are made to precisely fit over the teeth. They have rounded edges made of premium resin to prevent oral injuries from sharp metal.
Because of their tight fit, Invisalign trays provide more exact control over tooth straightening. Patients receive a set of aligners that gradually move their teeth into the proper positions.
2. It's simpler to maintain dental hygiene
The ability to properly take care of teeth is one of the biggest benefits of removable aligners over traditional braces. With Invisalign, patients can remove the aligners and resume their regular dental routine. It is possible to brush and floss without the need for any extra tools. Ensuring that food particles, bacteria, and plaque do not build up on the surfaces of the aligner and teeth requires regular brushing and cleaning.
3. A decrease in dental visits
With invisible aligners, patients won't need to visit the dentist as frequently, and their appointments will be much shorter and less intrusive. The dentist will have given them new aligners to change out every two weeks, but they will still need to return every four to six weeks. There are no brackets to reattach or cables to modify.
4. No dietary limitations
Because the aligner trays are removable with Invisalign, patients are free to consume whatever food they choose. In contrast, if you have braces, your dentist will urge you to avoid eating anything sticky, hard, crunchy, or even requiring you to bite your food deeply because the metal brackets could break off or the wires could stretch. Patients who choose to use Invisalign aligners don't have to worry about what they eat.
Diego Costa is author of this article and writes since long time. For further details about Invisalign Clear Aligners in Fishers please visit the website.
submitted by sadlerortho01 to u/sadlerortho01 [link] [comments]
Benefits of receiving Invisalign clear aligners treatment in Fishers
Many people who want to get their crooked teeth straightened feel self-conscious about how they look. Dental problems like overbites, underbites, and crooked teeth can harm a person's self-esteem and sense of beauty. Conversely, there are many more reasons why straightening the teeth is important than just making them seem better. Untreated crooked teeth might result in severe dental issues. Some advantages of selecting Invisalign for teeth straightening include the following:
1. They feel at ease
It is more comfortable to use Invisalign aligners than traditional braces. Traditional metal brackets' sharp edges can cause painful sores that take a long time to cure as well as damage to the soft oral tissues. The removable aligners are made to precisely fit over the teeth. They have rounded edges made of premium resin to prevent oral injuries from sharp metal.
Because of their tight fit, Invisalign trays provide more exact control over tooth straightening. Patients receive a set of aligners that gradually move their teeth into the proper positions.
2. It's simpler to maintain dental hygiene
The ability to properly take care of teeth is one of the biggest benefits of removable aligners over traditional braces. With Invisalign, patients can remove the aligners and resume their regular dental routine. It is possible to brush and floss without the need for any extra tools. Ensuring that food particles, bacteria, and plaque do not build up on the surfaces of the aligner and teeth requires regular brushing and cleaning.
3. A decrease in dental visits
With invisible aligners, patients won't need to visit the dentist as frequently, and their appointments will be much shorter and less intrusive. The dentist will have given them new aligners to change out every two weeks, but they will still need to return every four to six weeks. There are no brackets to reattach or cables to modify.
4. No dietary limitations
Because the aligner trays are removable with Invisalign, patients are free to consume whatever food they choose. In contrast, if you have braces, your dentist will urge you to avoid eating anything sticky, hard, crunchy, or even requiring you to bite your food deeply because the metal brackets could break off or the wires could stretch. Patients who choose to use Invisalign aligners don't have to worry about what they eat.
Diego Costa is author of this article and writes since long time. For further details about Invisalign Clear Aligners in Fishers please visit the website.
2024.05.17 11:32 CommanderRoku Fully Explained: Hero Descriptions (Part I)
 | To celebrate the upcoming 25th anniversary of the Phantom Menace this 19th of May, I decided to go all out on discovering the hidden effects or poorly described star cards in this game based on the plentiful resources and posts of the past (References are found at the end). At the same time, I did what I could to rewrite the ability and card descriptions to be somewhat unilateral and have similar explanations. Many were a surprise to be sure but a welcome one, while others are completely out of hand. Use what’s useful to you, and feel free to share your own test results. At last we will reveal these stats to all, at last… submitted by CommanderRoku to StarWarsBattlefront [link] [comments] Hero Descriptions (Part I) · Boba Fett o Base Health: 600 health o Health Regeneration: 150 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Body Shot Attack Damage: 105 / 75 o Head Shot Attack Damage: 198 / 141 (R4) o Blaster Range: 20 / 40 meters o Blaster Spread: Tight o Rate of Fire: 360 shots/minute o Blaster Overheat: 10 bursts (28 shots) o Flamethrower Melee Damage: 100; damage doubles within outer 5% of reach distance. o Jetpack Flight Speed: 12.5 meters/second o Jetpack Flight Time: 5 seconds (20%/second) (YB1) o Jetpack Refill Time: 12 seconds (8.3%/second) (YB1) o CONCUSSION ROCKET § Launches a rocket that breaks on impact. The 1st explosion obscures vision and prevents lightsaber target locks for 5 seconds, canceling weapon-centered abilities as well; the 2nd explosion disables affected weapons for 1.2 seconds. Area of Effect: 25 meters; Cooldown Time: 15 seconds. (YT3, Comment: u/macggnore) o FOR THE HUNT § Modifies jetpack to be used without fuel consumption while being undetected by enemy radars. Enemies nearby are also revealed. Area of Effect: ?; Duration: 8 seconds; Cooldown Time: 10 seconds. o ROCKET BARRAGE § Launches five rockets dealing 75 damage each. Five Rockets on One Enemy: 375 damage; Area of Effect: 3 meters; Duration: 2.4 seconds; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. · Bossk o Base Health: 600 health o Health Regeneration: 600 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 25 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Jump Height: 6 meters o Body Shot Attack Damage: 126 / 45 o Head Shot Attack Damage: 126 / 45 o Charged-up Shot to Body: 156 / 156 o Charged-up Shot to Head: 296 / 296 o Blaster Range: 8 / 22 meters o Blaster Spread: Medium o Rate of Fire: 100 shots/minute o Blaster Overheat: 8 shots o Melee Damage: 65 o DIOXIS GRENADE § Releases a 10-meter cloud of dioxis gas dealing up to 118 damage to enemies within it for 6 seconds. Damage is per in-game ticks and not seconds, dealing more damage per second at times. Damage per tick: 5 to 6; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. (R4) o PREDATOR INSTINCTS § Modifies the primary weapon into a micro-grenade launcher with each grenade dealing 80 / 40 damage. Thermal vision and faster sprint speed are also gained. Area of Effect: 3 meters; Duration: 8.5 to 25 seconds; Cooldown Time: 25 seconds. o PROXIMITY MINES § Deploys three sticky mines that after being armed for 4 seconds, detonate when triggered and deal 76 damage each. Three Mines on One Enemy: 228; Explosion Radius: 6 meters; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. · Chewbacca o Base Health: 700 health o Health Regeneration: 200 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Body Shot Attack Damage: 90 / 50 o Head Shot Attack Damage: 144 / 48 o Explosion Radius: 1 meter o Zoomed-in Body Shot Damage: 100 / 96 o Zoomed-in Head Shot Damage: 145 / 126 (R4) o Zoomed-in Explosion Radius: 2 meters o Rate of Fire: 66 shots/minute o Bowcaster Overheat: None o Bowcaster Range: 20 / 25 meters o Zoomed-in Range: 35 / 45 meters o Bowcaster Spread: Wide / Tight o Melee Damage: 90 o Melee Speed: Fast o SHOCK GRENADE § Throws a grenade that breaks on impact and splits into five missiles that shock enemies for 1.1 seconds; Area of Effect: ?; Cooldown Time: 15 seconds. (S1) o FURIOUS BOWCASTER § Modifies the bowcaster to fire fully charged shots. Body Damage: 182 / 166; Head Damage: 291; Zoomed-In Body: 217 / 191; Zoomed-In Head: 343; Range: 25 / 50 meters; Zoomed-In: 30 / 50 meters; Duration: 7.5 to 25 seconds; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. (R4) o CHARGE SLAM § A sprint attack that by sprinting forward and slamming onto the ground, enemies are knocked down, 150 damage to enemies within 4 meters. 30% damage reduction is received while sprinting. Base Health: 700; Health Points: 910; Area of Effect: 8 meters; Sprint Duration: ?; Cooldown Time: 15 seconds. (R4) · Darth Vader o Base Health: 800 health o Health Regeneration: 250 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Jump Height: 10 meters o Basic Attack Damage: 130 damage o Rear Attack Damage: 160 damage o Swing Speed: 1.7 swings/second o Lightsaber Swings: 10 swings o Lightsaber Blocks: 14 blocks o Blaster Deflections: 2121 damage o Deflection Spread: 0.2 o Stamina Regeneration Time: 3.00 seconds o Stamina Regeneration Delay: 2.25 seconds o LIGHTSABER THROW § Throws the lightsaber 20 meters away and returns, each hit to enemies dealing 130 damage. Damage dealt reduces by 50% if used alongside CHOKE. Cooldown Time: 8 seconds. o FOCUSED RAGE § Basic lightsaber attacks deal 15 extra damage, 200 bonus health is gained, and stamina drain decreases by 50%. Duration: 10 seconds; Cooldown Time: 15 seconds. o CHOKE § Force chokes multiple enemies for 1.5 seconds, dragging them up into the air and dropping them, dealing 126 damage. Reach Distance: ?; Cooldown time: 25 seconds. (YT1) · Emperor Palpatine o Base Health: 700 health o Health Regeneration: 250 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 75 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Jump Height: 10 meters o One-handed Attack Damage: 14 damage/0.3 seconds (60/sec) o Two-handed Attack Damage: 28 damage/0.3 seconds (110/sec) o One-handed Stamina Drain: 10% stamina/second (10 seconds) o Two-handed Stamina Drain: 15% stamina/second (6.5 seconds) o Attack Reach Distance: 14 meters o Melee Damage: 80 o CHAIN LIGHTNING § Throws a burst of force lightning hits an enemy target selected then bounces up to six different enemies. Each hit deals 120 damage. Reach distance: 18 meters; Cooldown Time: 14.5 seconds. o DARK AURA § First dealing 15 damage at startup, force energy deals 15 damage per in-game tick to enemies, slowing them down as well. Total Damage: 135; Area of Effect: 10 meters; Duration: 8 seconds; Cooldown Time: 25 seconds. o ELECTROCUTE § Force lightning hits the ground, shocking enemies and disabling their blasters for 1 second. Reach Distance: 15 meters; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. · Han Solo o Base Health: 650 health o Health Regeneration: 200 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Body Shot Attack Damage: 80 / 55 o Head Shot Attack Damage: 152 / 104 o Blaster Range: 20 / 50 meters o Blaster Spread: None o Rate of Fire: 108 shots/minute o Blaster Overheat: 8 shots o Melee Damage: 65 o DETONITE CHARGE § Throws a sticky charge that is detonated remotely. When detonated, damage is dealt and enemies are knocked down. Damage: 200 / 70; Explosion Radius: 10 meters; Cooldown Time: 18 seconds. o SHARPSHOOTER § Modifies the primary weapon to fire rapidly for the next few seconds. Body Damage: 65 / 40; Head Damage: 123 / 76; Range: 35 / 15 meters; Rate of Fire: 350 shots per minute; Duration: 3 to 25 seconds; Cooldown Time: 15 seconds. (R4) o SHOULDER CHARGE https://preview.redd.it/e7mmvg8s7y0d1.png?width=225&format=png&auto=webp&s=ee82e4140a3fe621d584b025ae64ab1b99f2d43d § A sprint attack that by sprinting forward, the enemy hit by it is knocked down, dealing 200 damage to troopers and 150 damage to heroes. The damage goes through blocks. Sprint Duration: ?; Cooldown Time: 10 seconds. · Iden Versio o Base Health: 650 health o Health Regeneration: 200 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Body Shot Attack Damage: 20 / 10 o Head Shot Attack Damage: 38 / 19 o Alternate Fire Attack Damage: 150 o Alternate Blast Radius: 6 meters o Blaster Range: 30 / 50 meters o Blaster Spread: Tight o Rate of Fire: 780 shots/minute o Blaster Overheat: 48 shots (YB1) o Melee Damage: 65 o STUN DROID § Sends out the droid to search for an enemy target up to 25 meters away, the droid then shocks the target and those around it for 1.5 seconds. The enemy shocked is also dealt 40 damage. Shock Area of Effect: ?; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. (R4; YB1) o PULSE CANNON § Modifies the primary weapon into a long-range rifle. Using the scope deals more damage if used at a farther distance. The first bar in the charge-up indicates the maximum damage input; the second bar is the timer for automatic fire. Body Damage: 40 / 35; Head Damage: 76 / 63; Charged-Up Body Damage: 89 / 207; Charged-Up Head Damage: 164 / 376; Cooldown Time: 1 second. (R4) o DROID SHIELD § Generates a personal bubble shield that protects against blaster damage. Using the primary weapon deactivates it. Unable to be used while STUN DROID is active. Shield Health: 750 health; Duration: 12 seconds; Cooldown Time: 10 seconds. · Kylo Ren o Base Health: 750 health o Health Regeneration: 250 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 8 meters/second o Jump Height: 10 meters o Basic Attack Damage: 125 damage o Rear Attack Damage: 165 damage o Swing Speed: 1.8 swings/second o Lightsaber Swings: 14 swings o Lightsaber Blocks: 14 blocks o Blaster Deflections: 1112 damage o Deflection Spread: 0.45 o Stamina Regeneration Time: 2.10 seconds o Stamina Regeneration Delay: 2.00 seconds o PULL § Force pulls enemies, dealing 10 damage. Reach Distance: 20 meters; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. o FRENZY https://preview.redd.it/x3d1m1cz7y0d1.png?width=225&format=png&auto=webp&s=05070933116fc641176058b7344c12cdb47b1510 § A frenzy of 3 to 4 lightsaber attacks by leaping towards an enemy target, either attacking the same enemy or leaping again to another. 50% damage reduction is received during the frenzy. The last attack of a three-hit frenzy and the last two attacks of a four-hit frenzy goes through blocks. A four-hit frenzy is activated by using the ability while looking away from the enemy target, immediately after a dodge, a jump hop, a lightsaber attack, or using PULL. Each frenzied lightsaber strike deals 160 damage to troopers and 115 damage to heroes. Leap Distance: 10 meters; Total to Troopers: 480 damage; Total to Heroes: 345 damage; Base Health: 750; Health Points: 1125; Cooldown Time: 10 seconds. o FREEZE § Force freezes enemies for 2.5 seconds. Reach Distance: 15 meters; Cooldown Time: 24 seconds. · Lando Calrissian o Base Health: 650 health o Health Regeneration: 200 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Body Shot Attack Damage: 40 / 25 o Head Shot Attack Damage: 76 / 47 o Blaster Range: 20 / 50 meters o Blaster Spread: Medium o Rate of Fire: 420 shots/minute o Blaster Overheat: 17 shots (YB1) o Melee Damage: 65 o SMOKE GRENADE § Releases a 10-meter cloud of smoke that obscures vision and prevents lightsaber target locks. Duration: 10 seconds; Cooldown Time: 14 seconds. (YB1) o SHARP SHOT § Selects up to five enemy targets and fires a flurry of shots dealing 200 to 240 damage. Headshots deal 380 damage. Reach Distance: 40 meters; Cooldown Time: 12 seconds. (R4) o DISABLER § Throws a sticky device that reveals enemies nearby and scrambles enemy radars. In addition, enemies can be shocked for 1.1 seconds through remote activation. Area of Effect: 20 meters; Duration: 25 seconds; Cooldown Time: 19 seconds. · Leia Organa o Base Health: 650 health o Health Regeneration: 200 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 4.5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Body Shot Attack Damage: 80 / 40 o Head Shot Attack Damage: 152 / 76 o Alternate Fire Attack Damage: 145 o Alternate Fire Charge-Up Time: 1.5 seconds o Alternate Fire Explosion Radius: 1 meter o Blaster Range: 20 / 40 meters o Blaster Spread: Tight o Rate of Fire: 340 shots/minute o Blaster Overheat: 17 bursts o Melee Damage: 65 damage o THERMAL DETONATORS § Throws detonators that each deal up to 250 damage. Up to three detonators are ready for use, all of which must be used for the cooldown timer to begin. Cooldown Time: 15 seconds. o RAPID FIRE § Swaps the primary weapon for an E-11 dealing 350 damage per second. Rate of Fire: 600; Body Damage: 36 / 19; Head Damage: 68 / 36; Duration: 8 to 25 seconds; Cooldown Time: 15 seconds. (R4; YB1) o SQUAD SHIELD § Deploys a 10-meter squad shield with 3000 health that protects against blaster fire and regenerates 5 health per in-game tick to allies. Duration: 30 seconds. Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. · Luke Skywalker o Base Health: 750 health o Health Regeneration: 200 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 100 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 2.7 seconds o Sprint Speed: 8.6 meters/second o Jump Height: 10 meters o Basic Attack Damage: 130 damage o Rear Attack Damage: 160 damage o Swing Speed: 2.1 swings/second o Lightsaber Swings: 10 swings o Lightsaber Blocks: 10 blocks o Blaster Deflections: 1112 damage o Deflection Spread: 0.45 o Stamina Regeneration Time: 3.00 seconds o Stamina Regeneration Delay: 1.00 second o PUSH § Force pushes enemies 10 meters away, dealing 150 damage to troopers and 90 damage to heroes. Reach Distance: 12 meters; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. o REPULSE § Knocks down enemies using the Force, dealing 130 damage to troopers and 75 damage to heroes. Area of Effect: 12 meters; Cooldown Time: 17 seconds. o RUSH § A lightsaber dash attack dealing 100 damage by leaping forward. Two dash attacks are ready for use. Cooldown Time: 5 seconds. · Darth Maul o Base Health: 700 health o Health Regeneration: 250 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 8 meters/second o Jump Height: 10 meters o Basic Attack Damage: 120 damage o Rear Attack Damage: 150 damage o Swing Speed: 1.9 swings/second o Lightsaber Swings: 14 swings o Lightsaber Blocks: 10 blocks o Blaster Deflections: 810 damage o Deflection Spread: 0.45 o Stamina Regeneration Time: 2.10 seconds o Stamina Regeneration Delay: 2.00 seconds o FURIOUS THROW § Throws the lightsaber 20 meters away and returns, each hit to enemies dealing 85 damage. Cooldown Time: 8 seconds. o CHOKE HOLD § Force chokes multiple enemies, dragging them up into the air and launching them several meters away, dealing 77 damage. Reach Distance: 15 meters; Cooldown time: 18 seconds. o SPIN ATTACK § A lightsaber dash attack dealing 100 damage by leaping forward 15 meters. Two dash attacks are ready for use. Cooldown Time: 5 seconds. · Rey o Base Health: 750 health o Health Regeneration: 250 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 8 meters/second o Jump Height: 10 meters o Basic Attack Damage: 120 damage o Rear Attack Damage: 140 damage o Swing Speed: 2.0 swings/second o Lightsaber Swings: 10 swings o Lightsaber Blocks: 14 blocks o Blaster Deflections: 1112 damage o Deflection Spread: 0.45 o Stamina Regeneration Time: 1.65 seconds o Stamina Regeneration Delay: 1.00 second o DASH STRIKE § A sprint attack that knocks down enemies hit by it, dealing 130 damage. Cooldown Time: 10 seconds. o INSIGHT § Basic lightsaber attacks deal 10 extra damage and stamina drain is decreased by 50%, all while being undetected by enemy radars. Enemies nearby are also revealed. Basic Attack: 130 damage; Rear Attack: 150 damage; Lightsaber Swings: 20 swings; Lightsaber Blocks: 28 blocks; Blaster Deflections: 2224 damage; Area of Effect: 30 meters; Duration: 8 seconds; Cooldown Time: 10 seconds. o MIND TRICK § Confuses enemies with the Force for 4 seconds. Player controls will be inverted and cursor sensitivity will be lowered. Reach Distance: 18 meters; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. · Yoda o Base Health: 700 health o Health Regeneration: 250 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Jump Height: 10 meters o Basic Attack Damage: 125 damage o Rear Attack Damage: 150 damage o Swing Speed: 1.6 swings/second o Lightsaber Swings: 12 swings o Lightsaber Blocks: 10 blocks o Blaster Absorption: 2121 damage o Stamina Regeneration Time: 2.10 seconds o Stamina Regeneration Delay: 1.00 second o UNLEASH § Force pushes enemies, pushing them away several meters more, dealing 110 damage. When absorbing force attacks or blaster fire, both reach distance and damage are increased. Force attacks stay absorbed for longer. Damage Increase: 110 / 130 / 160 / 190; Area of Effect: ?; Cooldown Time: 12 seconds. o PRESENCE § 150 bonus health is gained while breaking free out of any immobilizing effect. Allied troopers within several meters also gain 75 bonus health, while allied heroes gain 150 bonus health. Duration: 8 seconds; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. o DASH ATTACK https://preview.redd.it/9tht28a38y0d1.png?width=225&format=png&auto=webp&s=123050e1934ba22f4c5f2326ead6a05ccd957ce1 § A lightsaber dash attack dealing 85 damage by leaping forward. The damage goes through blocks. Two dash attacks are ready for use. Cooldown Time: 5 seconds. · Finn o Base Health: 600 health o Health Regeneration: 200 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Body Shot Attack Damage: 52 / 45 o Head Shot Attack Damage: 98 / 85 o Blaster Range: 25 / 50 meters o Blaster Spread: Tight o Rate of Fire: 240 shots/minute o Blaster Overheat: 24 shots o Melee Damage: 65 o DEADEYE § Auto-locks blaster fire onto a single enemy. Reach Distance: 30 meters; Body Damage: 30 / 20; Head Damage: 57 / 38; Duration: 5 to 25 seconds; Cooldown Time: 15 seconds. (R4) o BIG DEAL § 120 to 150 bonus health is gained, 25% to 55% damage reduction is received, ability cooldowns are reduced by 50%, and all blaster heat is removed. Any ally within 15 meters receives the same effects alongside 100 to 130 bonus health and 15% to 45% damage reduction. The number of allies also improves the ability’s effects. Total Number of Allies Needed: ?; Base Health: 600; Health Points: 930; Duration: 10 seconds; Cooldown Time: 18 seconds. o UNDERCOVER TEAM § Primary weapon is swapped for a GLIE-44 while revealing enemies nearby, making allies nearby undetected from enemy radars, giving them faster sprint speed. Cancels BIG DEAL when activated. Body Damage: 42 / 30; Head Damage: 79 / 57; Area of Effect: 15 meters; Duration: 5 to 25 seconds; Cooldown Time: 15 seconds. (R4) · Captain Phasma o Base Health: 700 health o Health Regeneration: 150 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 7 meters/second o Body Shot Attack Damage: 19 / 15 o Head Shot Attack Damage: 36 / 28 o Blaster Range: 35 / 60 meters o Blaster Spread: Becomes Tight o Rate of Fire: 660 shots/minute o Blaster Overheat: 48 shots (YB1) o STAFF STRIKES § The default melee attack. For troopers, the 1st hit deals 160 damage, the 2nd 190, the 3rd hit 220. For heroes, the 1st hit deals 120 damage, the 2nd 150, the 3rd hit 200. The 3rd hit also knocks enemies down. Only 30 damage is dealt to heroes hit from behind. (S1; R4; YB1) o SURVIVOR § 200 bonus health is gained. Duration: 15 seconds; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. o FIRST ORDER SENTRY DROID § Deploys a sentry droid that constantly rotates, always looking out for a target. When an enemy target is spotted, it stops rotating and fires, dealing 24 damage per shot. It also shocks enemies for 0.8 seconds. If destroyed, the explosion damage deals 150 damage. Shock Area of Effect: 15 meters; Cooldown Time: 20 seconds. (R4) · General Grievous o Base Health: 800 health o Health Regeneration: 250 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 8 meters/second o Jump Height: 7 meters o Basic Attack Damage: 130 damage o Rear Attack Damage: 160 damage o Swing Speed: 1.8 swings/second o Lightsaber Swings: 12 swings o Lightsaber Blocks: 10 swings o Blaster Deflections: 222 damage o Deflection Spread: 20 o Stamina Regeneration Time: 3.00 seconds o Stamina Regeneration Delay: 2.00 seconds o THRUST SURGE § A lunge attack where an enemy is stabbed and knocked down, dealing 160 damage. Reach Distance: 15 meters; Cooldown Time: 13 seconds. o UNRELENTING ADVANCE § A slow moving forward attack that deflects all blaster shots or lightsaber attacks from the front that lasts for 5 seconds. Any enemy standing in the way is dealt with 110 damage every 0.45 seconds. Cooldown Time: 11 seconds. o CLAW RUSH https://preview.redd.it/keas1vq58y0d1.png?width=225&format=png&auto=webp&s=5566fccf2f8f48cc92f97414d748fd9b141ff679 § A crawl attack that knocks down enemies hit by it, dealing 130 damage. 40% damage reduction is received during the attack. Enemies hit during the initial 0.2 seconds of the attack can be hit again during the last 0.2 seconds of the attack. Base Health: 800; Health Points: 1120; Duration: 3.2 seconds; Cooldown Time: 13 seconds. · Obi-Wan Kenobi o Base Health: 750 health o Health Regeneration: 300 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 4.5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 8 meters/second o Jump Height: 10 meters o Basic Attack Damage: 130 damage o Rear Attack Damage: 150 damage o Swing Speed: 1.8 swings/second o Lightsaber Swings: 10 swings o Lightsaber Blocks: 25 blocks o Blaster Deflections: 2121 damage o Deflection Spread: 0.2 o Stamina Regeneration Time: 3.00 seconds o Stamina Regeneration Delay: 1.00 seconds o ALL-OUT PUSH § Force pushes enemies, dealing 170 damage to troopers and 150 damage to heroes. Charging it up for 1.2 seconds increases the reach distance up to 22 meters. Damage also increases, dealing 200 damage to troopers and 180 damage to heroes. 80% damage reduction is also received while charging up the force push. Base Health: 750; Health Points: 1350; Reach Distance: ?; Cooldown Time: 14 seconds. o RESTRICTIVE MIND TRICK § Restricts enemies from using their abilities for 5.5 seconds using the Force. An enemy being knocked down cancels the effect. Reach Distance: 20 meters; Cooldown Time: 21 seconds. o DEFENSIVE RUSH § A sprint attack that damages enemies hit by it, dealing 140 damage. The final lightsaber strike deals 60 extra damage, 200 damage in total. It also deflects all blaster shots or lightsaber attacks from the front. Cooldown Time: 10 seconds. · Count Dooku o Base Health: 750 health o Health Regeneration: 250 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 8 meters/second o Jump Height: 10 meters o Basic Attack Damage: 130 damage o Rear Attack Damage: 160 damage o Swing Speed: 2.0 swings/second o Lightsaber Swings: 14 swings o Lightsaber Blocks: 14 blocks o Blaster Deflections: 1112 damage o Deflection Spread: 0.45 o Stamina Regeneration Time: 2.10 seconds o Stamina Regeneration Delay: 2.00 seconds o LIGHTNING STUN § Force lightning shoots forward, knocking enemies down and dealing 160 damage to a single trooper and 120 damage to a single hero. Damage is decreased by 10 for every additional enemy caught in the lightning, to a maximum of 50 less damage. Reach Distance: 9 meters; Cooldown Time: 14 seconds. o DUELIST § Basic lightsaber attacks deal 25 extra damage and swing speed is increased to 2.4 swings per second. New Basic Attack: 155 damage; New Rear Attack: 185 damage; Duration: 10 seconds; Cooldown Time: 13 seconds. o EXPOSE WEAKNESS § For 5.5 seconds, an enemy target receives 20% damage weakness, is inflicted with slower movement, and has their bonus health removed. The cooldown timer is replenished if the enemy target is defeated. Normal Basic Attack: 130 damage; Normal Rear Attack: 160 damage; New Basic Attack: 156 damage; New Rear Attack: 192 damage; LIGHTNING STUN: 192 damage; Reach Distance: 11 meters; Cooldown Time: 16 seconds. · Anakin Skywalker o Base Health: 800 health o Health Regeneration: 250 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 50 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 4.5 seconds o Sprint Speed: 8 meters/second o Jump Height: 10 meters o Basic Attack Damage: 130 damage o Rear Attack Damage: 170 damage o Swing Speed: 2.2 swings/seconds o Lightsaber Swings: 12 swings o Lightsaber Blocks: 10 blocks o Blaster Deflections: 1392 damage o Deflection Spread: 0.3 o Stamina Regeneration Time: 1.65 seconds o Stamina Regeneration Delay: 2.00 seconds o PULL DOMINANCE § Force pulls enemies, dealing 120 damage to troopers and 80 damage to heroes. Reach Distance: 18 meters; Cooldown Time: 15 seconds. o HEROIC MIGHT § Force pushes enemies, dealing 100 damage to troopers and 90 damage to heroes. 90% damage reduction is received when holding the ability while the area of effect is increased up to 20 meters, depending on the amount of damage taken during the ability. Base Health: 800; Health Points: 1520; Area of Effect: 10 meters; Cooldown Time: 18 seconds. o PASSIONATE STRIKE https://preview.redd.it/p423a4b88y0d1.png?width=225&format=png&auto=webp&s=7d7db348d0288704496ec8209a8b1271dc046a68 § Two heavy lightsaber attacks. The 1st attack deals 70 damage to troopers, 180 damage to heroes. The 2nd attack deals 40 damage to troopers, 130 damage to heroes. The damage goes through blocks. Cooldown Time: 13 seconds. o RETRIBUTION § Force chokes enemies for 2 seconds, every second dealing 100 damage to troopers and 75 damage to heroes. Afterwards, they are force pushed away, dealing 100 damage to troopers and 75 damage to heroes. 90% damage reduction is received during the ability. Rather than a cooldown, the ability charges up when 2500 damage is taken. Damage taken by allies nearby charges it up as well. Base Health: 800; Health Points: 1520; Total Damage to Troopers: 296; Total Damage to Heroes: 222; Area of Effect: 15 meters. · BB-8 o Base Health: 650 health o Health Regeneration: 300 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 65 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 4 seconds o Shock Prod Damage: 29 per 0.3 seconds o Rate of Fire: 216 shocks/minute o Shock Prod Overheat: 10 seconds o Shock Prod Range: 5 meters o RESISTANCE BACKING § Scrambles enemy radars, revealing enemies nearby. Enemies within 20 meters receive 5% damage weakness. Normal Basic Attack per 0.3 Seconds: 29 damage; New Basic Attack: 30 damage; CABLE SPIN per 0.3 Seconds: 47 damage; Total CABLE SPIN: 1229 damage; ROLLING CHARGE to Troopers: 210 damage; ROLLING CHARGE to Heroes: 158 damage; Duration: 12 seconds; Cooldown Time: 18 seconds. o CABLE SPIN § An attack that by spinning cables by a 5-meter radius, 45 damage is dealt to enemies every in-game tick. 30% damage reduction is also received. Base Health: 650; Health Points: 845; Total Damage: 1170 Damage?; Duration: 8 seconds; Cooldown Time: 25 seconds. PURPLE: HIDDEN ACTION/EFFECT o ROLLING CHARGE § A sprint attack that by sprinting forward, the enemy hit by it is knocked down, dealing 200 damage to troopers and 150 damage to heroes. The damage goes through blocks. Sprint Duration: ?; Cooldown Time: 10 seconds. o TECHNICAL SUPPORT § Objectives are captured faster. Will be counted as two units when capturing a point. o SWIFT REACTION § Any ally within 7 meters will have their cooldown times reduced by 5%. · BB-9E o Base Health: 600 health o Health Regeneration: 250 health o Health Regeneration Rate: 60 health/second o Health Regeneration Delay: 3 seconds o Shock Prod Damage: 24 per 0.3 seconds o Rate of Fire: 216 shocks/minute o Shock Prod Overheat: 10 seconds o Shock Prod Range: 5 meters o SMOKE SCREEN § Deploys a 30-meter cloud of smoke obstructing vision and reveals enemies nearby. Duration: 12 seconds; Cooldown Time: 18 seconds. o SHOCK SPIN § Knocks down enemies with an electric pulse dealing 90 damage. Then, enemies within 15 meters will have their blasters overheated, and enemies within 5 meters will be dealt 30 damage every in-game tick. Total Damage: 270 Damage?; Duration: 8 seconds; Cooldown Time: 25 seconds. o CHARGE UP § Removes shock prod’s heat. Any ally within 20 meters will also have their blaster heat removed and their ability cooldown times reduced by ?. Duration: 5 seconds; Cooldown Time: 15 seconds. o TECHNICAL SUPPORT § Objectives are captured faster. Will be counted as two units when capturing a point. o BACTA SUPPORT § Any ally within 7 meters are healed 3 health per second. CATEGORIZED BY COLOR https://preview.redd.it/u4dwuqkcey0d1.png?width=809&format=png&auto=webp&s=8655571ca286e70362a8575daa4b53554b97db78 NOTES · The EPIC rarity is only stated in the card description if it is a different value than shown in-game. · All Star Card descriptions were rewritten to be unilateral and have similar explanations. The names of heroes and second-person pronouns were avoided. · Clearer antonyms are used: increased/decreased; extended/reduced. o Increase/decrease suggests a progression in size, amount, or numbers (like adding/subtracting health, damage, stamina drain, and sprint speed). o Extend/reduce suggests a change made to a value or number (like percentages for time, distance, and blaster heat). · Damage Reduction is received; health points are regained. · To avoid confusion, the term increased cooldown speed and increased recharge time (which uses percentage increased) is avoided. To keep all related effects as close in description as possible: extended/reduced cooldown time (still percentage) is the simplest way to describe the effect without changing the in-game number values. · Extra damage is damage added to ability; bonus damage is situational. · Some values were rounded to whole numbers to reflect in-game values. Such are health points, damage points, and blaster overheat. As a result, though noticeably small, the actual values in-game may be a little off when it comes to stacked values (like stacking damage reduction) and are yet to be tested. · Some stats between the BF2 wiki and SammyBoiii’s Hero Guides differ in stats; however, they agree for the most part and usually differ by units less than a second. · Feel free to pick any hero and test out the stats yourself. The more accurate stats we have, the better we can use them. · Question Marks are unknown values. If you happen to know them or calculate the value, feel free to share them. Video proof seems to always work best. · I personally feel that being open to the intricacies of every star card and ability is the best way to go and should not be considered an exploit. Everyone should know what’s happening when the enemy team starts using these game-changers (and there are many people who do), and best enabling them to learn how to counter it. In the end, understanding these little details leads to a more competitive and playable battlefront. · Although not too often, some of the supposed up-to-date references below contradict each other; I had to make a final choice without having the time to test them. · Getting all these stats was a hard-earned headache in the end. Feel free to correct any discrepancies you may find! REFERENCES BF1 BF2 Community on Fandom [Most stats taken from here] https://battlefront.fandom.com/wiki/Heroes_and_Villains R1 These are ALL the Broken Hero Star Cards (u/RogueZeroRendar on Reddit) https://www.reddit.com/StarWarsBattlefront/comments/gcyh0these_are_all_the_broken_hero_star_cards/ R2 Hero Star Cards that are broken in a “beneficial way”? (u/T-RevLynn on Reddit) https://www.reddit.com/StarWarsBattlefront/comments/ub797m/hero_star_cards_that_are_broken_in_a_beneficial/ R3 Hero Star Card Guide (u/ MAshby1001 on Reddit) https://www.reddit.com/StarWarsBattlefront/comments/pmf1b5/hero_star_card_guide/ R4 Damage stats for every trooper, hero and reinforcement in BF2 (u/ImpecableBunny on Reddit) [To Confirm Stats] https://www.reddit.com/StarWarsBattlefront/comments/15bvq7z/damage_stats_for_every_trooper_hero_and/#lightbox R5 Grievous strikes again (u/Accomplished_Ebb1545 on Reddit) [“Jedi Killer” Secondary Effect] https://www.reddit.com/StarWarsBattlefront/comments/1610bg5/grievous_strikes_again/ S1 All Broken Hero Starcards in BF2 (By shuds and Shineberg on Steam) https://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=3024044483 YB1 SWBF2 Guide to Hero/Villain Stats (By jmorga3) [To Confirm Stats; Found this list after finishing my list, consider it a simplified version] https://www.yekbot.com/swbf2-guide-to-hero-villain-stats/ YT1 Star Cards Breakdown (@KillerDebit on YouTube) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtoW9-Eb-QU&list=PLwVdQ5vamLGbW4srkAHahjSYp7qayFb88 YT2 Every hidden/actual star card effect on battlefront 2 (@Picos on YouTube) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EZb-iNSpFrM YT3 Battlefront 2 has 17 Star Cards that DON’T WORK (or are useless)… DO NOT USE THESE! (@Battlefront Knight on YouTube) [OUTDATED, BUT USEFUL COMMENT SECTION] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQNIOHv-yxA YT4 SammyBoiii: Star Wars Hero Guides [Stats also taken from here] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9yGv_5YaeI&list=PLMe4n3PD17TRrp_7adLtTblLCDmZeygZm YT5 Every Broken Hero Card In Battlefront 2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0H70XpXI24 YT6 Star Wars Battlefront 2 Testing 5 USELESS Star Cards And Proving That They Don't Work! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBF4kRo6Y88 |
2024.05.17 11:18 Proud_Cod9137 DVT/PE pain? help
Hello, i am 22 years old. i know the thread says it cant diagnose but im just looking for advice. i went to the er about 7 months ago with what i thought were symptoms of dvt. pain in my groin and calf, heart palpitations and chest pain, on and off. they basically laughed at me saying "dr. google told you u have a blood clot huh", took my blood, and scanned my chest xray, said it looked fine. then sent me home saying i have anxiety with a 3500$ bill.
now 7 months later, ive had worsening pain, and its daily now. my groin down to my knee will throb and sometimes sharp pain. sometimes my toes look blue/purple ish, but it becomes better after a shower. chest pain and fast heart rate, sometimes it feels like an electric bolt in my heart, other times its a sort of dull aching in my chest that will last minutes or hours. most nights i struggle to fall asleep as my chest is hurting and sometimes im woken up by intense heart pain. my lower left stomach oftentimes has a dull pain and ive also been having small amounts of blood and dark stool about once a month but most days it looks normal. and some days my stomach will bloat up massively like im pregnant but only on the left side for a couple hours. i am so tired all the time, having to take naps about every 4 or 5 hours. sometimes ill go a full day without much pain, other days its constant.
im just wondering if this sounds like a clot or pe to you guys, i cant afford to go to hospital if they are going to laugh at me, and not even do an ultrasound on my leg or anything. i was a heavy nicotine vaper for about 5 years, but have recently attempted to quit, (currently hit it about 3 times a day to get me through). everytime i try to quit, after about 2 days fully sober, my leg starts hurting worse so then i hit it again cuz i get scared. ive seen some studies online that nicotine may suppress symptoms of health issues and even may hold clots in place due to constriction which then can increase risk of the clot moving when u quit, so im wondering if each time in a couple days clean my symptoms are finally showing more or if it really is just anxiety.
the thing is, im not often anxious, and when i am most anxious, such as when i was at the hospital, i didnt feel the symptoms. they seem to be worst when i am just sitting at home watching or working on pc, or out with my gf doing simple things like grocery shop. again, i know you cant diagnose me, and i plan on making a dr appointment after the weekend passes. im just wondering your imput, and also what things i should tell the doctor to make sure they do the proper tests this time around. thank you
submitted by Proud_Cod9137 to ClotSurvivors [link] [comments]
now 7 months later, ive had worsening pain, and its daily now. my groin down to my knee will throb and sometimes sharp pain. sometimes my toes look blue/purple ish, but it becomes better after a shower. chest pain and fast heart rate, sometimes it feels like an electric bolt in my heart, other times its a sort of dull aching in my chest that will last minutes or hours. most nights i struggle to fall asleep as my chest is hurting and sometimes im woken up by intense heart pain. my lower left stomach oftentimes has a dull pain and ive also been having small amounts of blood and dark stool about once a month but most days it looks normal. and some days my stomach will bloat up massively like im pregnant but only on the left side for a couple hours. i am so tired all the time, having to take naps about every 4 or 5 hours. sometimes ill go a full day without much pain, other days its constant.
im just wondering if this sounds like a clot or pe to you guys, i cant afford to go to hospital if they are going to laugh at me, and not even do an ultrasound on my leg or anything. i was a heavy nicotine vaper for about 5 years, but have recently attempted to quit, (currently hit it about 3 times a day to get me through). everytime i try to quit, after about 2 days fully sober, my leg starts hurting worse so then i hit it again cuz i get scared. ive seen some studies online that nicotine may suppress symptoms of health issues and even may hold clots in place due to constriction which then can increase risk of the clot moving when u quit, so im wondering if each time in a couple days clean my symptoms are finally showing more or if it really is just anxiety.
the thing is, im not often anxious, and when i am most anxious, such as when i was at the hospital, i didnt feel the symptoms. they seem to be worst when i am just sitting at home watching or working on pc, or out with my gf doing simple things like grocery shop. again, i know you cant diagnose me, and i plan on making a dr appointment after the weekend passes. im just wondering your imput, and also what things i should tell the doctor to make sure they do the proper tests this time around. thank you
2024.05.17 10:50 shane-jay222 My Bunion Nightmare: Why Waiting for Surgery Made Things Worse!
Longer I waited for surgery, the worse my bunion got. Sharp pain, knee issues, all because I put it off. Don't let a bunion dictate your life like it did mine. Time for a change! 💪 #BunionFree2022 #NewYearNewMe #bunion
Learn More: https://halluxcare.com/products/tailors-bunion-bunionette-pain-relief-correction-protection-sleeves
submitted by shane-jay222 to HalluxCare [link] [comments]
Learn More: https://halluxcare.com/products/tailors-bunion-bunionette-pain-relief-correction-protection-sleeves
2024.05.17 10:45 dbjeeneieb Baby kicking cervix/vagina area
23 weeks, FTM, who is yet to feel any kicks to the stomach, possibly due to my anterior placenta. I haven’t been too worried as baby girl is very active in scans and I’ve been told this can be normal.
However, I have been feeling these short sharp stabs in the cervix for weeks, feels totally… strange! I recently realised they’re probably kicks as they feel exactly as I would imagine a kick (just not where I expected 😂), It also makes sense as baby is always in breech position in scans … I know there is still plenty of time, but does anyone know whether it’s likely she will rotate from that breech position, given I’ve so far only ever felt kicks in my cervix and she always seems to be in the same spot… anyone have a similar experience to share?
Thank you!
submitted by dbjeeneieb to pregnant [link] [comments]
However, I have been feeling these short sharp stabs in the cervix for weeks, feels totally… strange! I recently realised they’re probably kicks as they feel exactly as I would imagine a kick (just not where I expected 😂), It also makes sense as baby is always in breech position in scans … I know there is still plenty of time, but does anyone know whether it’s likely she will rotate from that breech position, given I’ve so far only ever felt kicks in my cervix and she always seems to be in the same spot… anyone have a similar experience to share?
Thank you!
2024.05.17 10:41 SuccessfulPhone7047 20 with cancer ?
My weird symptoms since least than a year
• Brown/dark black/red discharge/ spottings any time in the cycle. Or even after sex (with big clots sometimes)
• Very irregular
• very long periods and with big flows sometimes
• 2 years of infertility
• few sharping pain. I am not in pain everyday but when I am it's REALLY REALLY painful asf
• only pain in the right side of my belly
• weird and thick white discharges
• a lot of bloating / weight gain
• sleeping a lot
• small appetite
• constipation and Diarrhea, weird metabolism...
What do y'all think...
submitted by SuccessfulPhone7047 to endometrialcancer [link] [comments]
• Brown/dark black/red discharge/ spottings any time in the cycle. Or even after sex (with big clots sometimes)
• Very irregular
• very long periods and with big flows sometimes
• 2 years of infertility
• few sharping pain. I am not in pain everyday but when I am it's REALLY REALLY painful asf
• only pain in the right side of my belly
• weird and thick white discharges
• a lot of bloating / weight gain
• sleeping a lot
• small appetite
• constipation and Diarrhea, weird metabolism...
What do y'all think...
2024.05.17 10:28 StargazerTea Paranormal Stories: House of Mirrors pt. 2
Continued from part one.
In the mirror I saw a figure of the darkness next to the foot of my bed. I screamed, only for the figure to dash back inside my closet and close the doors behind it. To the naked eye, the doors seemed to roll back on their own, but because of the many mirrors inside my room, I could see the shadowy figure.
“What’s wrong?” my mom burst into my room not even four seconds later.
“J-j-just a nightmare?” I was uncertain if my imagination was too strong for my own good so I held back on the truth.
I wish I told her the truth. That wasn’t the last time I would see the figure in the mirror.
It happened again, about five years later. Yeah it didn’t happen right away. I wondered if the figure I saw was friendly and I simply scared it away for a while. That was my first mindset, but then I second guessed myself and simply thought maybe it was just my imagination playing with me.
At age 12, things started to become rocky with my parents. They fought over the same things, but they also fought over me. I had gone into the world of music to the point where I wanted to take up guitar, piano, and violin. My mom took one side of the stance where she didn’t believe that I could commit to any of them. My dad believed the opposite, fighting that I could do anything if I set my mind to it.
Again, conflict resided. My angry mother could still barge into my room if I didn’t lock the doors. She once found me writing, insisted on me showing her what I wrote, when I resisted she pulled it away from me and read my vampire fanfiction.
I was an angsty girl. Hence my writings were a bit suggestive at the time. My mom and my dad both read my work. My dad actually liked what I wrote aside from the fact it was about the supernatural. Of course, my mother again got mad since she’s the most religious in our family. She was, in a sense, a heretic.
Needless to say, since my family’s religion absolutely detests “spiritualistic and demonic” media, I got grounded. Also to clarify, yes this also meant I never read or watched the Harry Potter series, including the Twilight series. Although I don’t think I missed out on much with the Twilight series lol. Eventually I managed to rent a book that I got from my school’s library, called Hush, Hush, which laid in my backpack, tempting me to read it.
So there I was, no laptop and in my room. I didn’t really care since I had a guitar and a notebook. I still could find pleasure outside of my laptop, which of course my mother absolutely detested as well. Whenever she grounded me, she used to take away any kind of toy. Then, once she realized I could read on my own and was making up stories when I couldn’t read, she began to take books away. Punishments with my family wasn’t really a punishment, I could always find a way to entertain myself. Even if she took my notebooks away, I’d still end up daydreaming about something, even act out scenes I’d come up with in my head.
Now you can understand why I pushed off the incident with the figure in the mirror as a figment of my imagination. I had figured it was a draft, that the wheels and tracking were well lubricated with some kind of oil that makes it hard for them to stay in place.
Sitting on my bed at age 12, I leant back and closed my eyes. I had notebooks, several books, a keyboard for me to practice piano on, and a guitar. It wasn’t a big deal. (Yes I was a spoiled child. I’m owning up to this since I was the only girl among four boys- plus I was also 13 years younger than my youngest brother.) However I was so tired, that I decided on lazily daydreaming. Besides, I could always sneak my laptop back late at night.
As a devoted writer, I continued on imagining the story I began. I imagined what it would feel like to have fangs teasing the throat of the neck, how it would be to be kissed and then bitten by a vampire... my mind was rolling and it didn’t stop. I was a twelve year old girl going through puberty.
I told myself to stop and I decided to pull out the book, smiling at my little success. I went back to the page I left off on at the library earlier that day. I buried myself into the book and became sleepy. I nearly finished the book by the time I set the book aside and stupidly put it on my bedside table.
I passed out soon after. I don’t recall what kind of dream I had at first, all I know is that sometime later in the night, I woke up again, but I could not move my body at all. I looked around my room, which was now fully dark. I barely could recognize anything around me. The familiar outline of my vanity was gone, any silver reflection was gone, I did not see a single mirror, so I knew I was no longer in my room anymore.
A slight humming noise was around me, the room I was in lit up with a red flashing light. It felt like I was being pinned down by some kind of restraint system, so I looked down and noticed these short pale creatures crawling on top of me, towards my face. I felt a sharp sting in my leg, and I knew one of the creatures had bit me already.
It became to feel like sharp knives stabbing me all over my body, until five creatures met my face, their eyes sullen- beady- staring down at me with bloodied mouths and lunged at my neck, causing me to scream..The sound finally piercing through and I could hear myself breathing again, I could hear my screams and my frantic prayers escaping my lips.
Had my mom not come into my room and slapped me on my face, jolting me out of it- whatever it was- I would have seen more than I could bare. She saw the book and her anger brewed even more at me.
“Are you tempting the demons to attack you or something?” she fumed and took the book off of the table. She led me down to the entryway and opened the garage door. “Put it in there.”
I followed her command and put the book into the garage. I knew it wasn’t the book’s fault, but it was associated with “demunz” in her eyes, so I didn’t dare argue against her.
“Do you want to die? If you keep associating with demons, you know god will never forgive you. You won’t inherit everlasting life, only everlasting death. You know that right?!?” she yelled at me, had my dad been there that night- he would have stopped her from going that far. I suddenly missed him.
Her anger then died down after she ranted at me, once she recognized that I was still petrified. She at least brought me to, which made me thankful, but I also felt betrayed. She was supposed to protect me, but all she cared about was the idea of force feeding me her belief system. All she cared about was telling me I was wrong.
“I’m-” she had begun, and I just looked away from her and saw a shadow in my mirror again, standing behind my mom. It didn’t feel as eerie anymore. It felt almost comforting to see it, it moved from my mom to me. A figure of it’s arm wrapped around my shoulder, and I felt the cool breeze raise goosebumps at it’s touch.
“Do you want me to sleep with you tonight?” her voice lowered.
“I’ll sleep alone,” I remarked, still stung with the hurt from her hurtful remark.
She looked hurt for a second, but then returned to her normal frown. “I’ll sleep in the little entertainment room next to you, if you need me just yell out again.”
“Fine,” I simply just pulled my blankets over me again, waited for her to leave, then cried into my pillow.
My mom left, not seeing the dark figure in the mirror and went into the adjacent room. At her departure, the darkness came into my bed, the eerie feeling no longer there and it snuggled against me.
Shh. It hushed me and brushed my hair.
I didn’t question it. I had been afraid of it for so long, but with the sweet affection it gave me- the affection I desired and longed for from both of my parents.
The falling tears turned into a silent sob, my body shook against the bed, little breathy whimpers muffled by my pillow.
Shh, it repeated until I fell asleep again.
When morning came, I woke up with a sore neck and I was irritated with my mom. I remembered what happened and then I snuck out to my laptop and searched up what had happened to me. I learned it was sleep paralysis and figured maybe my imagination went too far with the vampire thing. I was stiff, my body was so sore and I saw my closet doors closed.
Again, I had felt as if my imagination had made it up. I knew the kind of comfort it gave me is what I desperately longed for. It gave me what my family didn’t, and I hated myself. I thought it was a figment of my imagination since it knew all the things I wanted. That is, until something else showed up. The shadow figure in the mirrors was just the start of it all.
submitted by StargazerTea to Ghoststories [link] [comments]
In the mirror I saw a figure of the darkness next to the foot of my bed. I screamed, only for the figure to dash back inside my closet and close the doors behind it. To the naked eye, the doors seemed to roll back on their own, but because of the many mirrors inside my room, I could see the shadowy figure.
“What’s wrong?” my mom burst into my room not even four seconds later.
“J-j-just a nightmare?” I was uncertain if my imagination was too strong for my own good so I held back on the truth.
I wish I told her the truth. That wasn’t the last time I would see the figure in the mirror.
It happened again, about five years later. Yeah it didn’t happen right away. I wondered if the figure I saw was friendly and I simply scared it away for a while. That was my first mindset, but then I second guessed myself and simply thought maybe it was just my imagination playing with me.
At age 12, things started to become rocky with my parents. They fought over the same things, but they also fought over me. I had gone into the world of music to the point where I wanted to take up guitar, piano, and violin. My mom took one side of the stance where she didn’t believe that I could commit to any of them. My dad believed the opposite, fighting that I could do anything if I set my mind to it.
Again, conflict resided. My angry mother could still barge into my room if I didn’t lock the doors. She once found me writing, insisted on me showing her what I wrote, when I resisted she pulled it away from me and read my vampire fanfiction.
I was an angsty girl. Hence my writings were a bit suggestive at the time. My mom and my dad both read my work. My dad actually liked what I wrote aside from the fact it was about the supernatural. Of course, my mother again got mad since she’s the most religious in our family. She was, in a sense, a heretic.
Needless to say, since my family’s religion absolutely detests “spiritualistic and demonic” media, I got grounded. Also to clarify, yes this also meant I never read or watched the Harry Potter series, including the Twilight series. Although I don’t think I missed out on much with the Twilight series lol. Eventually I managed to rent a book that I got from my school’s library, called Hush, Hush, which laid in my backpack, tempting me to read it.
So there I was, no laptop and in my room. I didn’t really care since I had a guitar and a notebook. I still could find pleasure outside of my laptop, which of course my mother absolutely detested as well. Whenever she grounded me, she used to take away any kind of toy. Then, once she realized I could read on my own and was making up stories when I couldn’t read, she began to take books away. Punishments with my family wasn’t really a punishment, I could always find a way to entertain myself. Even if she took my notebooks away, I’d still end up daydreaming about something, even act out scenes I’d come up with in my head.
Now you can understand why I pushed off the incident with the figure in the mirror as a figment of my imagination. I had figured it was a draft, that the wheels and tracking were well lubricated with some kind of oil that makes it hard for them to stay in place.
Sitting on my bed at age 12, I leant back and closed my eyes. I had notebooks, several books, a keyboard for me to practice piano on, and a guitar. It wasn’t a big deal. (Yes I was a spoiled child. I’m owning up to this since I was the only girl among four boys- plus I was also 13 years younger than my youngest brother.) However I was so tired, that I decided on lazily daydreaming. Besides, I could always sneak my laptop back late at night.
As a devoted writer, I continued on imagining the story I began. I imagined what it would feel like to have fangs teasing the throat of the neck, how it would be to be kissed and then bitten by a vampire... my mind was rolling and it didn’t stop. I was a twelve year old girl going through puberty.
I told myself to stop and I decided to pull out the book, smiling at my little success. I went back to the page I left off on at the library earlier that day. I buried myself into the book and became sleepy. I nearly finished the book by the time I set the book aside and stupidly put it on my bedside table.
I passed out soon after. I don’t recall what kind of dream I had at first, all I know is that sometime later in the night, I woke up again, but I could not move my body at all. I looked around my room, which was now fully dark. I barely could recognize anything around me. The familiar outline of my vanity was gone, any silver reflection was gone, I did not see a single mirror, so I knew I was no longer in my room anymore.
A slight humming noise was around me, the room I was in lit up with a red flashing light. It felt like I was being pinned down by some kind of restraint system, so I looked down and noticed these short pale creatures crawling on top of me, towards my face. I felt a sharp sting in my leg, and I knew one of the creatures had bit me already.
It became to feel like sharp knives stabbing me all over my body, until five creatures met my face, their eyes sullen- beady- staring down at me with bloodied mouths and lunged at my neck, causing me to scream..The sound finally piercing through and I could hear myself breathing again, I could hear my screams and my frantic prayers escaping my lips.
Had my mom not come into my room and slapped me on my face, jolting me out of it- whatever it was- I would have seen more than I could bare. She saw the book and her anger brewed even more at me.
“Are you tempting the demons to attack you or something?” she fumed and took the book off of the table. She led me down to the entryway and opened the garage door. “Put it in there.”
I followed her command and put the book into the garage. I knew it wasn’t the book’s fault, but it was associated with “demunz” in her eyes, so I didn’t dare argue against her.
“Do you want to die? If you keep associating with demons, you know god will never forgive you. You won’t inherit everlasting life, only everlasting death. You know that right?!?” she yelled at me, had my dad been there that night- he would have stopped her from going that far. I suddenly missed him.
Her anger then died down after she ranted at me, once she recognized that I was still petrified. She at least brought me to, which made me thankful, but I also felt betrayed. She was supposed to protect me, but all she cared about was the idea of force feeding me her belief system. All she cared about was telling me I was wrong.
“I’m-” she had begun, and I just looked away from her and saw a shadow in my mirror again, standing behind my mom. It didn’t feel as eerie anymore. It felt almost comforting to see it, it moved from my mom to me. A figure of it’s arm wrapped around my shoulder, and I felt the cool breeze raise goosebumps at it’s touch.
“Do you want me to sleep with you tonight?” her voice lowered.
“I’ll sleep alone,” I remarked, still stung with the hurt from her hurtful remark.
She looked hurt for a second, but then returned to her normal frown. “I’ll sleep in the little entertainment room next to you, if you need me just yell out again.”
“Fine,” I simply just pulled my blankets over me again, waited for her to leave, then cried into my pillow.
My mom left, not seeing the dark figure in the mirror and went into the adjacent room. At her departure, the darkness came into my bed, the eerie feeling no longer there and it snuggled against me.
Shh. It hushed me and brushed my hair.
I didn’t question it. I had been afraid of it for so long, but with the sweet affection it gave me- the affection I desired and longed for from both of my parents.
The falling tears turned into a silent sob, my body shook against the bed, little breathy whimpers muffled by my pillow.
Shh, it repeated until I fell asleep again.
When morning came, I woke up with a sore neck and I was irritated with my mom. I remembered what happened and then I snuck out to my laptop and searched up what had happened to me. I learned it was sleep paralysis and figured maybe my imagination went too far with the vampire thing. I was stiff, my body was so sore and I saw my closet doors closed.
Again, I had felt as if my imagination had made it up. I knew the kind of comfort it gave me is what I desperately longed for. It gave me what my family didn’t, and I hated myself. I thought it was a figment of my imagination since it knew all the things I wanted. That is, until something else showed up. The shadow figure in the mirrors was just the start of it all.
2024.05.17 10:26 youspiritually Spaciousness
Greetings!
Let us move back to energy work.
"Teacher, why do they think so much?"
"Why do you think at all?! You're no better than them!" The pupils teacher wacked him on the crown of his head.
"!OUCH! Why would you do that!"
"It stopped you thinking, did it not?"
We of J believe humans are scared to feel the pain of thinking because of emissions from radio-towers stabbing your meridians when you think too deeply.
It is due to the pain in other words that thinking, especially thinking hard, causes that makes one feel dizzy, angry or an array of different feelings.
Thinking is many times easier and more pleasant in wifi free zones, we believe.
We of J believe that if one were to use the totality of their inner strength toward thinking really hard, the rebound would cause what humans understand as spaciousness or the meditative state since the flow of energy within the 'thinking chakra,' what humans call the 'Default Mode Network,' would travel toward the pineal gland and then, out into the universe.
J believe that if one were to use the totality of their thinking power, it would squeeze blood toward the pineal gland. It seems J believe wifi has the ability to cut off blood-flow into the pineal gland.
We of J believe negative entities have a great many humans 'sleeping,' by cutting off the connection the cerebral cortex has with the pineal gland. We of J believe that thinking is a most pleasant and enjoyable experience and is very orgasmic, however, in your world, it literally hurts.
J believe that the Elites created wifi to make thinking deep enough to have pineal experiences hurt so we would stop bothering to try. This was possibly in response to how close humanity came in the 60's - 70's to realizing the oneness of all things.
A deep thought is an analogy for the experience of travelling into the pineal gland - it feels very orgasmic to the point that many humans cannot handle it, now, thinking deeply makes people angry in your world - it never used to, we of J believe.
Our instrument was trained to traverse your lands and adapt to your wifi signals, but this process is most difficult and requires the pain killer 'THC,' which we of J believe, expands the meridians to nullify pain in flow of north facing magnetic energy.
We of J think nature is so apolorized to wifi, that going into nature and grounding between the Sun and the Earth could be a potential awakening method for many of your world, one would feel continuously better each day spent outside in the Sun and with ones bare feet to the ground.
We of J believe many of those who live with nature have a name for the pain wifi causes to ones meridians and when such animals or humans are tasked with being within what you understand as cities, they have to use so much thought-power, it can make them dizzy or sometimes disorientated until they become used to it.
Spaciousness is attained when the pineal gland is pressurized by the default mode network, after pressurization, a host of hormones are released into the body including DMT, our instrument was required to become used to the dizziness it invokes and teach humans about it on this website.
If these have any questions, please, do ask.
submitted by youspiritually to youspiritually [link] [comments]
Let us move back to energy work.
"Teacher, why do they think so much?"
"Why do you think at all?! You're no better than them!" The pupils teacher wacked him on the crown of his head.
"!OUCH! Why would you do that!"
"It stopped you thinking, did it not?"
We of J believe humans are scared to feel the pain of thinking because of emissions from radio-towers stabbing your meridians when you think too deeply.
It is due to the pain in other words that thinking, especially thinking hard, causes that makes one feel dizzy, angry or an array of different feelings.
Thinking is many times easier and more pleasant in wifi free zones, we believe.
We of J believe that if one were to use the totality of their inner strength toward thinking really hard, the rebound would cause what humans understand as spaciousness or the meditative state since the flow of energy within the 'thinking chakra,' what humans call the 'Default Mode Network,' would travel toward the pineal gland and then, out into the universe.
J believe that if one were to use the totality of their thinking power, it would squeeze blood toward the pineal gland. It seems J believe wifi has the ability to cut off blood-flow into the pineal gland.
We of J believe negative entities have a great many humans 'sleeping,' by cutting off the connection the cerebral cortex has with the pineal gland. We of J believe that thinking is a most pleasant and enjoyable experience and is very orgasmic, however, in your world, it literally hurts.
J believe that the Elites created wifi to make thinking deep enough to have pineal experiences hurt so we would stop bothering to try. This was possibly in response to how close humanity came in the 60's - 70's to realizing the oneness of all things.
A deep thought is an analogy for the experience of travelling into the pineal gland - it feels very orgasmic to the point that many humans cannot handle it, now, thinking deeply makes people angry in your world - it never used to, we of J believe.
Our instrument was trained to traverse your lands and adapt to your wifi signals, but this process is most difficult and requires the pain killer 'THC,' which we of J believe, expands the meridians to nullify pain in flow of north facing magnetic energy.
We of J think nature is so apolorized to wifi, that going into nature and grounding between the Sun and the Earth could be a potential awakening method for many of your world, one would feel continuously better each day spent outside in the Sun and with ones bare feet to the ground.
We of J believe many of those who live with nature have a name for the pain wifi causes to ones meridians and when such animals or humans are tasked with being within what you understand as cities, they have to use so much thought-power, it can make them dizzy or sometimes disorientated until they become used to it.
Spaciousness is attained when the pineal gland is pressurized by the default mode network, after pressurization, a host of hormones are released into the body including DMT, our instrument was required to become used to the dizziness it invokes and teach humans about it on this website.
If these have any questions, please, do ask.
2024.05.17 10:25 Possible_Length_4638 The fall
How did I end up here? How am I gonna escape it? For the last 3 years I have been falling to new depths,overe these years I have seen myself collapse to a point I can't bear, yet I think there's more to come. In this time, I've managed to destroy all the potential that I had, failing myself and everyone who had hopes on me. This began at the end of the 9th class, where I was losing my interest in studying, but somehow I managed to study, I wasn't good in language, but was pretty good in science and math, so I did good in those subjects, the 10th class went in lockdown, and I didn't study much, but was still doing math and science as I liked it. But it was apparent that something wasn't right, I was slowly losing interest.The 10th went with pretty good marks, but I knew that if it goes like that it's not gonna end well. I was trying new things to regain myself, motivation, practice, exercise etc, anything that would bring back my interest. Everything worked, but didn't last. And it did a lot of damage in the upcoming years. The 11th was rough, I went to a new school, only to realise it was a mistake, they dint teach well while take good record of attendance, so I can't even stay back and study on my own. So i had to go to school , then coaching and come back exausted. This went on and hampered my results a lot, I went below average. But I still had hopes of recovering. Meanwhile I was getting worried what's happening inside me, I had completely lost focus on studies, I didn't know what's going on, it felt like I was in class for the sake of it, doing lectures and taking notes. I knew it wasn't good and it would completely derail me from track. But I couldn't help it, every effort I gave, it didn't last, would work for a few days and it went to the same state. And then the 12th came to an end. I realised I hadn't studied the whole year, I panicked and did whatever I could to prevent the boat form sinking. But it was in vain too. I got poor marks in 12th boards. The nightmare had come true. But my parents were supportive, gave me another chance. I started fresh, full of energy, but it ended up in the same manner. I have wasted this year too. Bad marks while knowing I wasn't studying enough. But I couldn't do anything about it, every effort I gave in the whole year had been in vain.
So what has happened to me? Well for the past years I have completely lost interest in anything. It started with studies, now it's with everything. I don't like to go out, I can't enjoy anything, playing a videogame also feels like a chore, I've even lost interest in social media. I just can't get myself into the state where I can work towards my goals.ive been living in a brain fog for 3 years.my mind doesn't work right,everytime I try to concentrate on something, my mind strays away. I can't even focus on a movie for 5 minutes. I can't even watch my favourite movies. They are all downloaded in my pc, but I haven't watched any of them. I don't know if it's laziness or something else. All these years I've tried to get on track, only to get even more stray to the path. So many times have I tried to correct it, each time I end up frustrated. Can't imagine the times I went to sleep hoping I won't see the next day, as it was hard for me to see what I had become. I have cried to myself countless of times about it, keeping everything to myself. For who's gonna listen. The people who actually I thought should have listened have a different mindset. They just can't understand it. I haven't been able to understand my parents, what do the want, sometimes it feels like thay care about me, sometimes I feel like I'm just a project. They don't question anything I demand. They don't keep track of the money they give me. So it pains even more that I'm not able to deliver what they expect. But they also don't try to understand the situation I'm in. Till the mid of the 12th these things had affected me to a point, I had self esteem issues. My mind started carving an image of me that I was worthless. It would pick flaws in me and start telling me that I'm shit. It could pick any bad situation that happened to me and feed me with the message that you deserve it, you are a complete loser and nobody likes you. This just grew day by day. I have spent nights without sleep because the thoughts would keep coming to haunt me. It had given me a complete paralysis. I remember I once spent 4 days without eating anything, just lying down, unable to do anything. As if this was not enough, I suddenly realised I was losing hair. I already had a pretty bad self esteem, and this just boosted my insecurities. And just like that, I got body dysmorphia. I couldn't see me in the mirror. Usually I didn't see the mirror because I didn't give a damn about someone judging me. But now I don't see the mirror because I started hating on my appearance. And since my mind was already picking negatives, it found a good place to give me a blow. For the next 3 months, it would always pick on me, giving me thoughts about how I'm ugly, and I'm gonna end up alone. And it went like that. Sometimes the thoughts were so intense that it gave me literal headaches. I had to workout at 2 am just so that I could distract myself. Many days I also had to punch the walls till my hands went numb. Because the physical pain was more bearable than what was going in my mind. I didn't want to tell that to my parents, thinking they might not be able to handle it. Bit I wanted to give a hint that I wasn't fine. I sometimes told mom that I wasn't feeling good. You know what's the reply, keep yourself busy, study day and night and you will feel good. It angers me, here I am not able to handle anything and they only care about my studies. But I didn't want to lash out. I can't say everything to them. How would they react when I tell that I don't want to live anymore, when I feel like death is better than this downfall. How can I tell that sometimes when I'm cutting the vegetables I have to move away for sometime because I feel like stabbing myself to death. Or when I pick the razor to shave I feel like cutting the veins, or before sleeping I feel like gulping down the whole file of those finestaride tablets which I bought for hairfall but I had to quit because they were too powerfull. But I tried to hint them again, this time I just expressed my worry about losing my hair. They didn't pay much attention. The second time I tried, I got shouted at by dad. He told to stop thinking about it and to focus on studies. And on that day, I just stopped trying. I felt like I didn't matter, all that mattered was my academics and career. From that day, the phone calls from them felt like a formality. I didn't want to talk to them. I didn't want to go home on holidays, or occassions. My own home felt like a trap. I felt more safe alone in my room. Once I thought of the result is all the need, I'm up for it. I had to complete a chapter on centre of mass and collision. I was frustrated, not to mention that I got taunted by dad on the call a few minutes ago, I finished the whole chapter, 15 lectures, each of more than an hour, in one sitting. After finishing I could feel myself, my vision wasn't right, I was feeling dizzy. But I thought if I study in this manner, I might get good results, forget about my health, it wasn't my concern nor do I think my parents concern about it. But what happened, next day I went back to my old cycle of doing nothing. At this point, I was totally broken, but I couldn't just give up because ther was expectations on me and a lot of money was invested on me. I just cared about my results, stopped thinking about my own well being. But I couldn't do anything. I had failed to deliver in my drop year too. Facing all of this with loneliness with as the cherry on top. For all this time I had a deep loneliness in me. I just wanted someone by my side, who would listen to me, while I had none. But I also can't be around someone, I feel safe alone. So I'm with a mixed situation of being lonely while also wanting to be alone. At this point, I just want an end. Either the end of this situation or the end of life, anything would make me happy. The latter used to scare me because of that feeling that my parents would not be able to bear it. But after all this I don't even think they care, all they would be upset that I died a loser. I've defended them in my mind for too long because I never got a beating from them, I was raised in a good environment,never saw them fight. I felt like I was blessed to be born in this family. I ate up all the taunts and sarcasm from them thinking they just want a better life for me. But now I feel like a commodity being used for their own interests.
submitted by Possible_Length_4638 to JEENEETards [link] [comments]
So what has happened to me? Well for the past years I have completely lost interest in anything. It started with studies, now it's with everything. I don't like to go out, I can't enjoy anything, playing a videogame also feels like a chore, I've even lost interest in social media. I just can't get myself into the state where I can work towards my goals.ive been living in a brain fog for 3 years.my mind doesn't work right,everytime I try to concentrate on something, my mind strays away. I can't even focus on a movie for 5 minutes. I can't even watch my favourite movies. They are all downloaded in my pc, but I haven't watched any of them. I don't know if it's laziness or something else. All these years I've tried to get on track, only to get even more stray to the path. So many times have I tried to correct it, each time I end up frustrated. Can't imagine the times I went to sleep hoping I won't see the next day, as it was hard for me to see what I had become. I have cried to myself countless of times about it, keeping everything to myself. For who's gonna listen. The people who actually I thought should have listened have a different mindset. They just can't understand it. I haven't been able to understand my parents, what do the want, sometimes it feels like thay care about me, sometimes I feel like I'm just a project. They don't question anything I demand. They don't keep track of the money they give me. So it pains even more that I'm not able to deliver what they expect. But they also don't try to understand the situation I'm in. Till the mid of the 12th these things had affected me to a point, I had self esteem issues. My mind started carving an image of me that I was worthless. It would pick flaws in me and start telling me that I'm shit. It could pick any bad situation that happened to me and feed me with the message that you deserve it, you are a complete loser and nobody likes you. This just grew day by day. I have spent nights without sleep because the thoughts would keep coming to haunt me. It had given me a complete paralysis. I remember I once spent 4 days without eating anything, just lying down, unable to do anything. As if this was not enough, I suddenly realised I was losing hair. I already had a pretty bad self esteem, and this just boosted my insecurities. And just like that, I got body dysmorphia. I couldn't see me in the mirror. Usually I didn't see the mirror because I didn't give a damn about someone judging me. But now I don't see the mirror because I started hating on my appearance. And since my mind was already picking negatives, it found a good place to give me a blow. For the next 3 months, it would always pick on me, giving me thoughts about how I'm ugly, and I'm gonna end up alone. And it went like that. Sometimes the thoughts were so intense that it gave me literal headaches. I had to workout at 2 am just so that I could distract myself. Many days I also had to punch the walls till my hands went numb. Because the physical pain was more bearable than what was going in my mind. I didn't want to tell that to my parents, thinking they might not be able to handle it. Bit I wanted to give a hint that I wasn't fine. I sometimes told mom that I wasn't feeling good. You know what's the reply, keep yourself busy, study day and night and you will feel good. It angers me, here I am not able to handle anything and they only care about my studies. But I didn't want to lash out. I can't say everything to them. How would they react when I tell that I don't want to live anymore, when I feel like death is better than this downfall. How can I tell that sometimes when I'm cutting the vegetables I have to move away for sometime because I feel like stabbing myself to death. Or when I pick the razor to shave I feel like cutting the veins, or before sleeping I feel like gulping down the whole file of those finestaride tablets which I bought for hairfall but I had to quit because they were too powerfull. But I tried to hint them again, this time I just expressed my worry about losing my hair. They didn't pay much attention. The second time I tried, I got shouted at by dad. He told to stop thinking about it and to focus on studies. And on that day, I just stopped trying. I felt like I didn't matter, all that mattered was my academics and career. From that day, the phone calls from them felt like a formality. I didn't want to talk to them. I didn't want to go home on holidays, or occassions. My own home felt like a trap. I felt more safe alone in my room. Once I thought of the result is all the need, I'm up for it. I had to complete a chapter on centre of mass and collision. I was frustrated, not to mention that I got taunted by dad on the call a few minutes ago, I finished the whole chapter, 15 lectures, each of more than an hour, in one sitting. After finishing I could feel myself, my vision wasn't right, I was feeling dizzy. But I thought if I study in this manner, I might get good results, forget about my health, it wasn't my concern nor do I think my parents concern about it. But what happened, next day I went back to my old cycle of doing nothing. At this point, I was totally broken, but I couldn't just give up because ther was expectations on me and a lot of money was invested on me. I just cared about my results, stopped thinking about my own well being. But I couldn't do anything. I had failed to deliver in my drop year too. Facing all of this with loneliness with as the cherry on top. For all this time I had a deep loneliness in me. I just wanted someone by my side, who would listen to me, while I had none. But I also can't be around someone, I feel safe alone. So I'm with a mixed situation of being lonely while also wanting to be alone. At this point, I just want an end. Either the end of this situation or the end of life, anything would make me happy. The latter used to scare me because of that feeling that my parents would not be able to bear it. But after all this I don't even think they care, all they would be upset that I died a loser. I've defended them in my mind for too long because I never got a beating from them, I was raised in a good environment,never saw them fight. I felt like I was blessed to be born in this family. I ate up all the taunts and sarcasm from them thinking they just want a better life for me. But now I feel like a commodity being used for their own interests.
2024.05.17 10:11 Joy1067 Of Arrogance and Valor
“Incredible!”
The rebel reeled from the punch, the fist slamming through his protective helmet and cracking his jaw. He choked out a sob at the pain and the feeling of several of his teeth being knocked down his throat.
“This? This is what you send to try and rebel against the Imperium?! THIS?!”
A harsh kick was sent into the rebels stomach, making him cough up the rations he had that morning and a few of the once missing teeth. He grabbed his stomach and his body made to tilt forward and lay in the dust.
Only he was stopped as an armored gauntlet grabbed him by the throat and forced him to stand. His hands came up and grabbed at his attackers wrist as he stared into his own grim reaper.
Said killer wore the helmet of the Macraggian Auxilia, his faceplate being that of a stylized skull. His rank was shown proudly in the form of a centurions plum, blue and white horsehair picked out atop a gilded mount on the top of his helmet.
“Incredible. It’s truly incredible what passes for rebellion these days hm?”
The soldiers behind the centurion laughed or smiled as they watched their leader hoist the rebel up as if the rebel was some game beast that was just recently hunted. Pressure in the form of steam shot out of the centurions wrist, betraying the hidden augmented limb under the armor. The rebel tried to speak, scratching at the Centurion’s arm.
“What? Speak up damn you, and speak clearly. I have no time or patience to hear some long speech about tyranny or whatever else. We have your city to burn insurgent.”
And burn it would. Two large tanks with massive flamers could be seen in the back, protected by infantry and assault vehicles. The main force would break the walls, the infantry would kill the people, and the tanks would burn the rest to ashes.
“Aghh….thill….you….thasard!”
The rebel said, spitting blood and bone fragments from his shattered jaw through what was left of his faceplate.
“Ah. Nothing interesting to say. Oh well.”
The rebel tried in vain to speak again but was silenced as the centurion forced a power gladius through his mouth. He was then unceremoniously dropped to the dust, choking on blood as he watched the Macraggian soldiers march on his home. The last thing he saw before dying was his killer, taking his helmet off and smiling in a wide, cocky manner. ————————————————————————
“Don’t spare the body men, he was a rebel. March over him.”
Tiberius Victor, Centurion of the 3rd Macraggain Legion, yelled as he wiped the grim that had built up over his helmet. He scowled at the filth that adorned his armor and sighed.
“Bloody rebels will pay for more than just rebellion. Look at this! They scratched my faceplate! And that bastard I just killed dared to spit blood at me! Oh they will pay tenfold.”
He chuckled and shrugged as he replaced his helmet. He rolled his head and drew the lapistol he had holstered at his side. He examined it for a moment before shaking his head.
“Ugh….to easy.”
He holstered the pistol again and flourished his gladius as he grabbed the handholds of a Leman Russ tank that was about to pass him by. He climbed up until he stood on top of the tank and crouched down, using his newfound height to look over his army and the objective.
The city was massive….but so were the last three he had burned. Both Imperial Army and even Ultramarine Legion Command had told him he was too far ahead and that he needed to slow down. But where was the fun in that? Besides, the campaign has been far too easy thus far. He had suffered very few casualties, his men were never hungry and his tanks never ran dry on fuel, and the enemy bled. Oh how they bled.
He sighed.
“Easy. Far too easy. Captain?”
The command hatch the tank he rode popped open and a woman in the dirty coveralls and goggled helmet of a tank commander. She looked around, rubbing her eyes before turning and smiling widely. She gave a crisp salute, one which he lazily returned, before nodding.
“Aye my Centurion?”
“Do we have any more wine about? I’m parched from all these victories we keep piling on.”
The captain cringed then turned towards the city.
“Uh….my centurion? Wouldn’t you rather have some water?”
Tiberius turned his head towards the captain, the tilt of his head betraying the cocky smile hidden beneath that the captain and the rest of the army had come to love and hate.
“Captain….are you questioning me?”
“I-no! No, of course not my centurion! But uh….well….”
He made a ‘go on’ motion with his hand, not bothering to stand up from the relaxed position he had taken. He had laid down on his side, his sword hand having sheathed his gladius to prop his head up.
“Well….shouldn’t uh….shouldn’t wine be saved for victory?”
The centurion stared at her for a moment. A very long moment. Perhaps….to long of a moment.
“I….I apologize my centurion! I will-“
Laughter. The centurion was laughing, something he rarely did outside of combat or when around the campfires at night. He laughed loudly and caught the attention of several other Auxilia soldiers.
“True! Haha! I knew I kept you around for something Captain. Fine, me and you shall share the first bottle of wine after that….excuse for a city burns. Return to your duties captain.”
He waved the captain off then turned his head back to the city, not moving out of his relaxed position. She knew better then to consider him lazy or incompetent, she had seen him in action.
She saluted and quickly went back down into her tank. ————————————————————————
He held his helmet in the crook of his arm. He breathed in deeply, smiling as he watched the city burn. Something grabbed his boot and looked down, only to scowl in disgust.
A woman, her lower half aflame with one leg missing, held onto his boot and shin guard.
“Please….mercy! We surrender!”
He raised an eyebrow and followed the trail the rebel left in the dust to see several more wounded and scared rebels. One held up a white rag on a piece of rebar as a white flag.
Several of his auxilia aimed their rifles at the rebels as a sergeant began to moved forward with a pair of restraints.
He was stopped by Tiberius’s sword.
“Sergeant? What are you doing?”
“Uh…taking prisoners sir?”
The centurion tilted his head and smiled widely.
“Prisoners? I don’t recall ordering anyone to take prisoners.”
He lifted his boot and stomped on the wounded woman’s head, smiling wickedly at the crunch he heard under his foot.
“Uh….no my Centurion but legion command has-“
“Legion command? You are taking orders from Ultramarines instead of telling me that such orders have come through?”
“There was no time sir! The orders came fro-“
Tiberius put his helmet on and shoved the sergeant to the side, ripping the rifle from the soldiers hands.
“I see no space marines here soldier. I see soldiers and I see rebels. We kill rebels because we are soldiers.”
He took aim at the closest rebel, put his finger on the trigger and-
“Thats enough Centurion.”
He stopped. He slowly turned his head towards the new, feminine voice behind him.
“Excuse me troo-“
He stopped again and stared. She had to have been 10 feet or at least close, this goddess in blue and gold. Her short, cropped hair was golden blonde and a green, metallic laurel wreath was wrapped around her head to add to her noble features. She came with several ultramarines as an honor guard in tow but he was sure she could handle anything thrown her way with ease.
“The Lady of Macragge.”
He whispered in awe before looking around. Those under his command had shared his awe but where he shook himself free, the rest still stared.
“Damn you all, our Lady is here! Bow damn you! All of you bow!”
He paced up and down the line, ensuring his auxilia bowed. He then turned towards the rebels and pointed at the guards who stood over them.
“Them too, cmon now. Bow!”
The rebels resisted the guards orders and movements. The centurions rage grew as he stormed over and pulled his gladius from its sheath.
“I command thee BOW.”
He sliced the back of the knees of one of the captives, the man yelping in pain before yelling in agony from his nearly cut tendons. The rest fell in line quickly.
Tiberius marched towards the Primarch, her honor guard bringing their weapons to bare only for him to kneel down and stab his gladius into the dirt.
“My Lady. Centurion Tiberius Victor of the 3rd Macraggian Legion reporting.”
The Primarch stared down at the Centurion before her eyes went up and around. She took note of the rather large number of prisoners and the burning cityscape around them.
“A good campaign Centurion?”
Tiberius nodded, smiling widely under his helmet.
“Yes my Lady. I only wish it weren’t so boring, so easy! But it is done.”
It took every ounce of self control to not scowl at his arrogant and cocky nature. He spoke as if he had stomped on a bug rather than a rebels skull. Yet….something about him caught her attention.
“Remove your helm centurion.”
He did so without delay, removing his helmet and setting it at her feet. His hair was cut in the traditional military ‘high and tight’ fashion and he was mostly clean cut save for a well trimmed mustache that went no further than the corners of his mouth.
“I recall telling my command staff to recall you back as you had pushed to far ahead. Yet we stand here at the city we were meant to take, the one we were meant to hold. The one….that is currently burning to ashes around us. What do you have to say for yourself Centurion?”
He said nothing for a long time. Then, to her surprise, he laughed. The auxilia around them slowly looked at each other, their faces hidden beneath their helmets but all were worried or tense.
“Hahah! Ah….I say mission accomplished my Lady. I also say that this light really brings out the color of your eyes.”
He laughed again and slowly stood up while extending his arms out wide.
“I say I give you the best gift this galaxy can offer to someone like you from someone like me.”
His smile grew into the same cocky, full of himself grin those under his command knew so well.
“I give you victory, my Lady Juno.”
He held his gladius up and flourished it, letting the blade catch the firelight of a dying city.
“Victory.”
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The rebel reeled from the punch, the fist slamming through his protective helmet and cracking his jaw. He choked out a sob at the pain and the feeling of several of his teeth being knocked down his throat.
“This? This is what you send to try and rebel against the Imperium?! THIS?!”
A harsh kick was sent into the rebels stomach, making him cough up the rations he had that morning and a few of the once missing teeth. He grabbed his stomach and his body made to tilt forward and lay in the dust.
Only he was stopped as an armored gauntlet grabbed him by the throat and forced him to stand. His hands came up and grabbed at his attackers wrist as he stared into his own grim reaper.
Said killer wore the helmet of the Macraggian Auxilia, his faceplate being that of a stylized skull. His rank was shown proudly in the form of a centurions plum, blue and white horsehair picked out atop a gilded mount on the top of his helmet.
“Incredible. It’s truly incredible what passes for rebellion these days hm?”
The soldiers behind the centurion laughed or smiled as they watched their leader hoist the rebel up as if the rebel was some game beast that was just recently hunted. Pressure in the form of steam shot out of the centurions wrist, betraying the hidden augmented limb under the armor. The rebel tried to speak, scratching at the Centurion’s arm.
“What? Speak up damn you, and speak clearly. I have no time or patience to hear some long speech about tyranny or whatever else. We have your city to burn insurgent.”
And burn it would. Two large tanks with massive flamers could be seen in the back, protected by infantry and assault vehicles. The main force would break the walls, the infantry would kill the people, and the tanks would burn the rest to ashes.
“Aghh….thill….you….thasard!”
The rebel said, spitting blood and bone fragments from his shattered jaw through what was left of his faceplate.
“Ah. Nothing interesting to say. Oh well.”
The rebel tried in vain to speak again but was silenced as the centurion forced a power gladius through his mouth. He was then unceremoniously dropped to the dust, choking on blood as he watched the Macraggian soldiers march on his home. The last thing he saw before dying was his killer, taking his helmet off and smiling in a wide, cocky manner. ————————————————————————
“Don’t spare the body men, he was a rebel. March over him.”
Tiberius Victor, Centurion of the 3rd Macraggain Legion, yelled as he wiped the grim that had built up over his helmet. He scowled at the filth that adorned his armor and sighed.
“Bloody rebels will pay for more than just rebellion. Look at this! They scratched my faceplate! And that bastard I just killed dared to spit blood at me! Oh they will pay tenfold.”
He chuckled and shrugged as he replaced his helmet. He rolled his head and drew the lapistol he had holstered at his side. He examined it for a moment before shaking his head.
“Ugh….to easy.”
He holstered the pistol again and flourished his gladius as he grabbed the handholds of a Leman Russ tank that was about to pass him by. He climbed up until he stood on top of the tank and crouched down, using his newfound height to look over his army and the objective.
The city was massive….but so were the last three he had burned. Both Imperial Army and even Ultramarine Legion Command had told him he was too far ahead and that he needed to slow down. But where was the fun in that? Besides, the campaign has been far too easy thus far. He had suffered very few casualties, his men were never hungry and his tanks never ran dry on fuel, and the enemy bled. Oh how they bled.
He sighed.
“Easy. Far too easy. Captain?”
The command hatch the tank he rode popped open and a woman in the dirty coveralls and goggled helmet of a tank commander. She looked around, rubbing her eyes before turning and smiling widely. She gave a crisp salute, one which he lazily returned, before nodding.
“Aye my Centurion?”
“Do we have any more wine about? I’m parched from all these victories we keep piling on.”
The captain cringed then turned towards the city.
“Uh….my centurion? Wouldn’t you rather have some water?”
Tiberius turned his head towards the captain, the tilt of his head betraying the cocky smile hidden beneath that the captain and the rest of the army had come to love and hate.
“Captain….are you questioning me?”
“I-no! No, of course not my centurion! But uh….well….”
He made a ‘go on’ motion with his hand, not bothering to stand up from the relaxed position he had taken. He had laid down on his side, his sword hand having sheathed his gladius to prop his head up.
“Well….shouldn’t uh….shouldn’t wine be saved for victory?”
The centurion stared at her for a moment. A very long moment. Perhaps….to long of a moment.
“I….I apologize my centurion! I will-“
Laughter. The centurion was laughing, something he rarely did outside of combat or when around the campfires at night. He laughed loudly and caught the attention of several other Auxilia soldiers.
“True! Haha! I knew I kept you around for something Captain. Fine, me and you shall share the first bottle of wine after that….excuse for a city burns. Return to your duties captain.”
He waved the captain off then turned his head back to the city, not moving out of his relaxed position. She knew better then to consider him lazy or incompetent, she had seen him in action.
She saluted and quickly went back down into her tank. ————————————————————————
He held his helmet in the crook of his arm. He breathed in deeply, smiling as he watched the city burn. Something grabbed his boot and looked down, only to scowl in disgust.
A woman, her lower half aflame with one leg missing, held onto his boot and shin guard.
“Please….mercy! We surrender!”
He raised an eyebrow and followed the trail the rebel left in the dust to see several more wounded and scared rebels. One held up a white rag on a piece of rebar as a white flag.
Several of his auxilia aimed their rifles at the rebels as a sergeant began to moved forward with a pair of restraints.
He was stopped by Tiberius’s sword.
“Sergeant? What are you doing?”
“Uh…taking prisoners sir?”
The centurion tilted his head and smiled widely.
“Prisoners? I don’t recall ordering anyone to take prisoners.”
He lifted his boot and stomped on the wounded woman’s head, smiling wickedly at the crunch he heard under his foot.
“Uh….no my Centurion but legion command has-“
“Legion command? You are taking orders from Ultramarines instead of telling me that such orders have come through?”
“There was no time sir! The orders came fro-“
Tiberius put his helmet on and shoved the sergeant to the side, ripping the rifle from the soldiers hands.
“I see no space marines here soldier. I see soldiers and I see rebels. We kill rebels because we are soldiers.”
He took aim at the closest rebel, put his finger on the trigger and-
“Thats enough Centurion.”
He stopped. He slowly turned his head towards the new, feminine voice behind him.
“Excuse me troo-“
He stopped again and stared. She had to have been 10 feet or at least close, this goddess in blue and gold. Her short, cropped hair was golden blonde and a green, metallic laurel wreath was wrapped around her head to add to her noble features. She came with several ultramarines as an honor guard in tow but he was sure she could handle anything thrown her way with ease.
“The Lady of Macragge.”
He whispered in awe before looking around. Those under his command had shared his awe but where he shook himself free, the rest still stared.
“Damn you all, our Lady is here! Bow damn you! All of you bow!”
He paced up and down the line, ensuring his auxilia bowed. He then turned towards the rebels and pointed at the guards who stood over them.
“Them too, cmon now. Bow!”
The rebels resisted the guards orders and movements. The centurions rage grew as he stormed over and pulled his gladius from its sheath.
“I command thee BOW.”
He sliced the back of the knees of one of the captives, the man yelping in pain before yelling in agony from his nearly cut tendons. The rest fell in line quickly.
Tiberius marched towards the Primarch, her honor guard bringing their weapons to bare only for him to kneel down and stab his gladius into the dirt.
“My Lady. Centurion Tiberius Victor of the 3rd Macraggian Legion reporting.”
The Primarch stared down at the Centurion before her eyes went up and around. She took note of the rather large number of prisoners and the burning cityscape around them.
“A good campaign Centurion?”
Tiberius nodded, smiling widely under his helmet.
“Yes my Lady. I only wish it weren’t so boring, so easy! But it is done.”
It took every ounce of self control to not scowl at his arrogant and cocky nature. He spoke as if he had stomped on a bug rather than a rebels skull. Yet….something about him caught her attention.
“Remove your helm centurion.”
He did so without delay, removing his helmet and setting it at her feet. His hair was cut in the traditional military ‘high and tight’ fashion and he was mostly clean cut save for a well trimmed mustache that went no further than the corners of his mouth.
“I recall telling my command staff to recall you back as you had pushed to far ahead. Yet we stand here at the city we were meant to take, the one we were meant to hold. The one….that is currently burning to ashes around us. What do you have to say for yourself Centurion?”
He said nothing for a long time. Then, to her surprise, he laughed. The auxilia around them slowly looked at each other, their faces hidden beneath their helmets but all were worried or tense.
“Hahah! Ah….I say mission accomplished my Lady. I also say that this light really brings out the color of your eyes.”
He laughed again and slowly stood up while extending his arms out wide.
“I say I give you the best gift this galaxy can offer to someone like you from someone like me.”
His smile grew into the same cocky, full of himself grin those under his command knew so well.
“I give you victory, my Lady Juno.”
He held his gladius up and flourished it, letting the blade catch the firelight of a dying city.
“Victory.”
2024.05.17 09:47 Edwardthecrazyman Hiraeth or Where the Children Play: Oh, Dear Brother of Mine, How I Hate What I've Made You [12]
First/Previous
Gemma was right about the sky’s open night, and I could sympathize with her recollection of the beauty, but for me it must’ve been a greater tragedy—the young woman had only ever enjoyed the stars in the pits of Golgotha; I could, long before, drink in the sky at leisure. Cruel memories.
The night the Rednecks died was one of viscera, but before that it was coolness on the breeze, a warmth by the fires while John played his guitar and we had only just taken two dozen kegs of lager (personal reserves) from the Atlanta despot—the man that kept his subjects as slaves and not a person among the camp was left without budding intoxication. No matter the age, everyone was invited to be merry; if it was that children too faced the plight of a bad world, then so too should they reap the moments of plenty—or so the camp figured.
John had taken a group by the fires where wagons were drawn in interlocking semicircles for cover and Jackson sat beside the picker. Jackson was a man which normally preferred quiet reflection over boisterous singing and nearly never wore the band on his throat, and yet there he was belting out the chorus at the top of his lungs, tankard in hand, red cloth blazed around his neck—it was a contagion and those drunk enough for easier embarrassment sang proudly along:
“There is power, there is power in a band of working folk!
When we stand hand in hand,
That’s a power, that’s the power,
That must rule in every land!”
I’d taken to the outlying shadows with my back pressed against the gas-powered caleche, my own tankard in hand. I loved the warmth of that great big family, truly, but even in those days—and maybe it was that queer youthfulness which longed for individualism that made me that way then—I remained as distanced as possible when I could. I sipped the lager, it was a fine drink and my brother Billy, nearly as old as I was when I’d first taken up in the infantry, swaggered to stand beside me just as quiet for minutes and we looked at the stars and he asked me what it was like to kill a man.
“Is it hard?” he asked.
I nodded, “Sometimes.”
“Killing monsters ain’t so bad. Don’t know if I could do it to a person.”
“You could if they meant to kill you; or if they meant to do it to someone you cared about,” I promised him. In those days, spry, energized, I held no time for staring into abysses; though I still wasn’t a man fully, I pretended as one. It was about family, and it was about doing what was right—what’s right seemed to change, or I changed. The world felt stark with good and evil and even later I’d feel that sentiment well up in me, but if that’s true, I know I stand more on the latter and so I intentionally obfuscated it—this I know. If not, it might be too much to bear. I was required to lie to myself and even in knowing I lied, it was better.
Billy tugged on the red kerchief around his throat and asked me how it looked on him.
“Looks good,” I said.
“Don’t think I look stupid at all?”
I smiled over my drink, “You always look stupid.” I sipped. “The neckwear’s fine.”
“Give me a break,” said Billy; he investigated his own cup, gave it a swish with his wrist, watching its contents swirl. “Aren’t you ever afraid you’ll die?”
“Sometimes—nights like this—I wouldn’t mind it.”
“Really?” my brother asked.
“There’s always a chance of it. Every moment, I guess.”
He smiled. “I wish I had that confidence.”
“You’ll get it,” I returned his smile; it was true that he would gain the fighting spirit. It came to us all with time and reminiscing on the early days, I recall the grit and the hatred—there was learning there too though. Besides, I’d seen the squalors of a stationary man. The stagnation of a place, an unmoving home.
John put his guitar away and laughter erupted from the crowd from something said and Sibylle, cowboy hat cocked funny, traipsed across the camp to the open keg for a refill; the man there, tending the cylinders, was a man named Tandy (a foreigner and one unknown besides the way he smoked a skunk pipe and told wild stories). My mother leaned over while Tandy opened the spigot mouth on the keg, and she froze there, and I could see her there cut out forever against the light of the fires; I watched, and it came so suddenly that I couldn’t be sure what’d happened at all. It was so sudden that I couldn’t find my weapon and I couldn’t find even the courage to fight because in those moments it wasn’t courage I needed, it was grounds to understand.
Sibylle came apart in two pieces immediately, torn completely through and dust erupted as her legs struck the ground while her torso spun through the air like a top, a trail of liquid trailed after, caught in the blue of night so it shone as black; she couldn’t scream. Tandy was a statue. Before anyone could react, more flesh, other bodies, went up and there was all manner of limbs which filled the ground, and it is astounding how quickly a red mist forms across the ground during a massacre. Perhaps the wails of my comrades started before, perhaps others fell before Sibylle, but I could not comprehend the goings-on till I saw her drop the way she did.
Frail human screams rose on the night; I slammed to the ground, tankard gone away and hands scrambling in the dirt; I reached up blindly and yanked Billy to my level and his expression was one of innocence, panic, tears even. Glancing around, I saw the demons bolt from the pitch-black darkness on the edges of camp, mutants taking the fore while greater creatures lurked further back, some hurled whips of gliding metal which writhed over their heads when they stretched them out for a strike—alien—and they sliced directly through soft human bodies. Not even a cry escaped me, but Billy let go with it and I slapped my cupped hand over his mouth hard to hold the screams. His voice would not have been alone anyway, not alongside that startling cacophony. Amidst the cries of people, there were the cries of horses, of our hounds.
We rolled across the ground, slipped beneath the raised body of the gas-powered caleche, remained quiet in the dark, peeked out between the wheels.
“What’s happening?” Billy whispered through my fingers; I removed my hand from him and caught a glimpse of him framed in a square of firelight through the wheels—we lay there on our bellies and the left side of his face was glazed with dirt where I’d pulled him down.
“Shh,” I told him, “Shh, please. Please.” Not another word came while I pleaded with him, pleaded with the world to make this all a nightmare.
Through the haze and the running silhouettes painted black, I saw what might have been Jackson; he stumbled and in the moment that it took me to gasp, his head was gone from his body, his torso slid on as he collapsed, came to rest mere feet from the motor wagon. I told myself that it wasn’t him, but it probably was.
Some mutants lumbered through the camp like animated corpses, some leapt with wild energy or sprayed noxious fumes which lingered in the air; others still were amalgams of humanlike limbs themselves—fiends—exhausting terrible sounds, producing smells of sulfur, glistening with whatever liquids excreted from their oblong alien orifices. Demons ran amok, chanted in devil tongued languages, laughed madly at the destruction—others still, those which displayed some greater intelligence, broke into a song I could never hope or want to replicate; it seemed a unified damnation.
“Please,” I repeated in a whimper and Billy hushed me this time and I realized we were holding hands, squeezing for dear life as figures walked the camp, speared those half-alive, elected others for twisted carnality.
In darkness, in fright plainly, we scuttled from the recess of our hiding place, kept quiet, held to each other, and went into the wasteland where nothing was—every shadow was a potential threat, every second could’ve been the last. We were holding hands; then we weren’t.
Only a glance—that’s all I afforded my brother and nothing more—what a joke of a person I am! What a coward I was. Always.
Something got him in the dark and instead of dying alongside those I cared about, I went on, heartbeat driving me till it was all that I heard in my ears and my muscles ached and my chest heaved and sweat covered me, chilled me in the breeze of the night—it was only once I’d accepted the dark completely, crawled into a hollowed space of rocks along a squat ridge that I watched the demolished camp; it seemed no larger than a spark, but the creatures, fiends and others continued their war cries; never before had I witnessed demons participate in such an attack.
I watched till the sun came, till the fires became smoke, then I watched the band of hell creatures disband. The smell of sulfur remained in the air—copper too—and I stumbled back to the camp in a dreamlike daze, totally unbelieving of the things I saw. Among those dead on the ground, I could recognize none; among those piked from rear to shoulder, standing like morbid scarecrows where they’d been steadied against the ground, I could not want to recognize.
Many of the wagons were overturned, including the gas-powered caleche and I went to it; the metal of its body was warped but I fell to the ground by it and pushed my back against the exposed undercarriage, remained frozen there while examining the bodies, the terrible strips of skin which rested places like wet sheets of paper, the piles of bones removed and smashed and piled.
I cried so deeply that oxygen became a memory, and the shakes couldn’t be contained.
It was like that for so long, knees pulled up, face pushed between, and the wails came unafraid of whatever attention they might garner; there was no rationale, but I imagine if there had been, I would’ve welcomed death in that misery. It was a deep wound that not even my own cowardice would overcome for the sake of survival.
Unaware of my surroundings, not wanting to look up from the ground between my legs, the noise which had started out as imaginary became real and I raised my head then to listen better and wipe my sore eyes; it was the sound of clip-clop horse hooves and I mildly wondered if any of the animals had been spared. I stood and pivoted around the dead camp and there it was, a man on a painted horse with golden hair; he leisurely drove the mount through the place, maneuvering around pools of blood, clumps of body parts and upon seeing me, he smiled and offered a languid wave, keeping one of his gloved hands on the reins.
The man wore white and swished his hair back upon arriving directly in front of me. Ahoy, he offered kindly, Did you happen to see the other riders?
I shook my head, feeling numb.
Ah, he said, I could have sworn four other riders, at least, passed me on my way. His gray eyes examined the carnage. Shame. He shook his head. You are?
“H-harlan.”
He nodded and nearly offered an expression of genuine condolence before descending from the horse; the animal gave a gentle grunt and wandered away from its master to inspect a nearby group of the dead. The man offered his hand, and I took it in a shake. Mephisto, said the man. He flashed a smile again before his face grew serious. I’ve come to you to deal.
I shot him a questioning look, one of bafflement.
I heard your calls from far off. He nodded, removed a white handkerchief from his breast pocket and swiped it down his face. Hot out. He shrugged then replaced the cloth in his pocket. This, he motioned to the disarray of vehicles, of bodies, I can’t fix all this—it’s too much—but there’s a person you love, I know. I could bring them back.
“Doctor?” In retrospect it was such a naïve question.
He shook his head.
“Angel?”
He grinned and nodded, Sure.
“Demon?”
Undoubtedly. His eyes—pits of gray in that radiant face—nearly expressed solemness; he daintily shook the hair from his face and looked at his steed which sniffed a corpse. What’s the word, Harlan? There are others calling and I must be on my way soon—I can’t dally. There was a sharpness to the words. Can’t dally. We must convene soon, or I’ll mosey on.
I snorted back the clog in my nose from the tears and wiped my eyes with my sleeves. “Okay.”
Deal?
I nodded, “Deal.”
Sleep tonight, said Mephisto, Sleep and you’ll be rewarded in the morning.
“You said it’s a deal.”
He nodded and scanned the carnage before we matched gazes and then he said, Yes?
“What is it you want from me?”
Nothing you need now. He called the horse, and it came, and he swept his feet quickly from the ground and settled into position atop the animal. Sleep, Harlan. You won’t be bothered. There are worse things still over the horizon.
I watched him go till he disappeared and once he was gone, I couldn’t cry anymore and instead rummaged through the wagons for what I might carry; along the way I found John, face twisted but corpse intact. The body from the previous night that I’d guessed was Jackson couldn’t be determined but I found him nowhere else. I slid Sibylle’s holster from her hips, fell hard onto the ground and found that I could sob more. I took her cowboy hat, placed it on my head and held her pistol in one hand and the belt holster dangled from the other while I searched the other bodies; there were so many, but I could not find Billy.
Waiting for darkness, I took the spot where I rested, back against the caleche’s undercarriage, watched the sky and felt the gun in my hand; it was heavy. I put it to my head, closed my eyes, and whispered affirmations to myself then I put the pistol between my splayed legs, watched it still in the dirt, and pulled the hat down over my eyes but it did little for the smell. Though the brim of the hat cut the sky out, I watched the ground and saw circling shadows form overhead and heard calls of turkey vultures; they came to pick over the bodies. I withdrew my knees to my chest there again and laid my forearm across them and bit into my arm while closing my eyes. I had thought I was a man and for a time, maybe I was, but there in that miserable pit of despair I became a child again and if I’d become more delirious, I’m sure I might’ve called out for Jackson like it was a bad dream.
Into a fading stupor of sleep in the sun I went and when I awoke again it was dark and chilly and I was tired and hungry but too sick to eat and hardly strong enough to move; I looked at the gun and put it into its holster and left it there by the caleche. In the light of the moon and stars, I moved to gather a bolt of canvas; I unfurled the fabric and created a leaning shelter against the overturned vehicle and crawled into it. There was a hole in the canvas, and I peeked out at the stars.
Weeping came again, but not so uproarious; I was stuck there letting go of whimpers, lying on my back, feeling the tears trace in lines from the outer corners of my eyes to collect along my earlobes. In time, I fell to sleep again on the hard ground because the mourning had taken all else from me.
A pinpoint of sunlight broke my eyelids and I jerked awake and reached for the holster, but it was gone. So was the hat. I crawled from the leaning shelter and there he was.
Billy stood plainly among the dried, congealed blood-soaked field and he looked on to the horizon and all shadows were long in the midday sun which hung up there in a soft blue sky. Whether it be a dream or a spell, I couldn’t care—I charged to him and spun him so he faced me and though his face was plain and expressionless, I wrapped him into a forceful hug. He placed his hands on my back and gave a gentle squeeze; when I pulled from him, my hands on his shoulders, I saw he held Sibylle’s hat in his left hand, pinched by the brim; he’d already tugged her holster belt around his hips—he could have it all. I shook while holding him then let go to wipe my face.
“You’re alive,” I nodded.
He nodded without speaking then looked at the hat in his hand and placed it on his head and firmly pressed it down.
“Billy! Hell, you’re alive!”
The corners of his mouth twitched upward for a moment then he nodded again. “Yeah.” His eyes curiously searched our surroundings like he meant to take each detail in forever.
I slapped him on the shoulder and almost squealed. “Goddammit.” I wiped my eyes again and could do little to keep the excitement from exploding from me. “Oh, we should go. We should go on and get somewhere safe.”
He nodded toward the horizon, “’Lanta?”
“Sure.”
We packed and it was a like an ethereal phantom remained among us beside the quiet dead; turkey vultures cawed to break the silence, pecked where they pleased on the bodies, and I couldn’t want to fight them. I kept sidelong eyes on Billy with the ever-present worry that he’d vanish. Perhaps he was the phantom.
From the rear of the caleche, I removed a few sentimental books Jackson liked, essential cookware, and sparse rations for the trek. The last thing I grabbed was my shotgun and a bit of ammo.
As we set from the dead place, the terrible silhouettes that were cut from there on the horizon behind us grew in my mind with every backward glance—I wanted to fall to pieces, but I saw Billy walk alongside me and although contented is not the right word, it is the nearest. The steps of our boots were all that was heard because I could not fathom to pierce the space between us with words for fear that it would all end. It was a dream, surely. I’d lost my mind. With my hands thumbed into the straps of my pack, I saw I my hands still shook, and they would shake a lot longer—years and with memories too. The crunch of earth underfoot became a rhythm and instead of looking at my brother, I watched his shadow on the ground.
“Everyone’s dead?” He asked.
“Yeah.”
“You’re sure?”
“Yeah,” I repeated.
“How ain’t I? How ain’t you?”
To say that it was luck would’ve been too morbid. Instead of saying anything, I shrugged, kicked a loose stone, watched my feet some more, and felt a queasiness come over me. For the moment, the immeasurable deaths of those I’d left behind were forgotten in the company of my brother and a sickness welled up inside of me so suddenly that I felt that I’d fall to pieces at the slightest provocation. Finally, I did speak again, but only after steeling myself to the troubles, “Yeah, how are you alive?”
Billy shrugged at me then stumbled up a hill which overlooked trash wood wilderness where sticks lay twisted and bare and further on the sight of Atlanta was visible and I cupped a hand across my brow and Billy did the same and we looked on at the shadows of the place out there where strings of smoke rose from the skyline as a signature for the desolation of the city; it was dead. I felt it in my bones.
My hands were light while my head was heavy, my throat was dry, and the entire world seized in moments of stillness or perhaps it was my own vision which construed the world in that way; I took to the small hill which Billy had climbed and sat there and stared at the place between my feet to steady myself.
“Fire,” said Billy.
I nodded and nearly choked.
Leviathan—till then I had no belief in dragons—glided over the broken city, its winged shadow little seen but its voice was deep across the scene, letting go of roars which shook the ground. We hid among the trash wood and moved down the hill and watched the creature thrash in the air as if it was angry for its abominable life. Whatever millennia it spent in the pits of hell seemingly thrust upon it a love of destruction and pain.
My brother moved with a more assured stride and kept a cool distance and upon fleeing from the wreckage, from the outlying area of Atlanta and the place we’d left our family, he spoke little and watched me strangely whenever I took to melancholic fatiguing. We lit no fires for fear of what it could draw from the night so in the dark I’d see him watching some far-off place, maybe seeing through the reality which surrounded us, and he’d snap from it, catch my eye, and disappear for minutes to scan the perimeter of whatever place we stayed. Being alongside my resurrected brother was lonelier than I could bear, and I hoped he’d disappear for good or that I could work up the courage to end my own life. It was like purgatory explained in books and for a time, it felt endless; upon witnessing the destruction of Atlanta, we pushed to Marrietta, and it was much the same. As was Chatanooga, Nashville, Knoxville, Louisville, Charlotte. The ocean had risen so that Fayetville was gone underwater, and the Florida leg disappeared completely as far as I’m aware. I understood later that Memphis was overlooked and more places further west were alive too, but when we’d exhausted the south, we moved north and found strongholds of families or traders or even small groupings of civilization, but by and large we found nothing much in the two years that we hoofed it from place to place; it was my doing mostly—I wanted to find a place untouched by the mayhem in the area my family had once patrolled.
In retrospect, I am certain that Billy only stayed by my side for convenience; there wasn’t any of my brother left in the man that was my travelling companion for that time. He was a ghost of a person and Mephisto had preyed upon my desire in the worst moment of weakness in my life. There were nights—maybe we’d taken up in a natural alcove for shelter or we’d locked ourselves in some ancient structure for sleep—I’d watch Billy lay where he was, Sibylle’s hat and holster lying beside him, and I’d think of putting him down but he’d stir and in a brief shadow I’d see my brother as he’d been and withdraw to bury my face in fake sleep to be met with images of the night the demons attacked where I’d shake, sweat, and bite my lips so hard I’d drink blood.
Two years we marched around the Appalachians and in that time, I felt myself wither and disconnect.
Upon moving further north we met Indianapolis—that’s what it was called back then—and it was run by an older woman called Lady Lazarus; I reckon her father, affluent and dead, was a fan of Plath. Indianapolis was fortified more than most with its high walls, and its wall men, and its underground facilities which produced substantial ammunition. We—me and Billy’s revenant—were travelling with a group of traders we’d taken up with from out west; they called themselves wizards and although they seemed of the occult, their spirits discounted whatever suspicions I might’ve had of them.
I remember first pushing through that big gate; the town kept with it an indisputable malaise and though we were greeted at the gate by the leader Lady Lazarus—her brothers came along with her—and her jovial demeanor carried a certain infectious quality, I could not help but notice that the regular denizens maintained a healthy distance from their leader (the guards which followed the Lady everywhere probably had something to do with this).
Lady Lazarus touched each of our hands in greeting with enthusiasm and I could not help but notice how soft they were, how vibrant her eyes were, how much she smiled, and how beautiful she was given her age; already her head was fully gray.
Upon meeting each of us, going through the wizard traders first, she came to me, and Billy and she shook my hand then pivoted to Billy.
“Welcome. You can call me Lady.”
Billy caught her hand in his, held it longer than she’d intended so that they held eye contact, and he smiled broadly, tipped the cowboy hat on his head back to expose his smooth forehead and said, “And you can call me Maron, mam. You are quite a sight for a tired man.”
Though Maron—as he’d named himself—was more boy than man, Lady took a disturbed liking to him immediately and we prolonged our stay in Indianapolis after the wizards departed to head west.
Under the rule of Lady, Indianapolis was a theocracy, with her addressing the huddled masses at the steps of her grand abode, she’d preach for hours on sin and strife and quote her favorite passages; though reminiscent of my time with the Rednecks, I never found any truth or sincerity or freedom in her teaching—hers was more trouble, brimstone, fire and I’d had enough of that for a lifetime. Public execution was common. As was torture.
Maron distanced himself further from me, but I remained to keep an eye on him—it was not sentimentality but rather I existed without purpose and conjured some from watching my brother.
Often, Lady invited Maron to her private rooms and though the rumors and speculation ran the full spectrum of perverse speculation, every denizen feigned ignorance at her pregnancy.
Upon giving birth, the infant was malformed with two heads—her brothers took this as an omen and killed the child, put their leader in the stocks for months, and stripped her of dignity while the denizens did to her what they pleased.
Maron rose through the wall men while Lady’s brothers assumed control of Indianapolis and called themselves Bosses; in the time since Lady’s reign, the place was renamed to Golgotha for its closeness to a messiah.
I went west but always found myself drawn back to Golgotha because of some emptiness in me. It was only with Suzanne that I wanted something more and knowing them, I almost believed in a world like the one that children dream about. The world that Gemma and Andrew chased after when they left home, like the one Aggie talked about in her mother’s books. There’s a hopelessness in me that I’ll never be rid of. In the interim between our initial arrival to Golgotha and that flight from that terrible city, I cannot know how many people I sacrificed in convening with demons because I refuse to know because the number would destroy me. That is the worst of it; I do not even have courage enough to face myself or the actions of my past in any substantive way.
Mephisto tainted me so that I could speak with his kind as a dealmaker and the disease grew.
Billy or Maron or whatever he is should have been reaped long ago or better, I should never have brought that abomination alive. Such a cruel world where a deep longing like that can be inverted, weaponized. Me and him should both die; me and him should have died a long time ago.
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Gemma was right about the sky’s open night, and I could sympathize with her recollection of the beauty, but for me it must’ve been a greater tragedy—the young woman had only ever enjoyed the stars in the pits of Golgotha; I could, long before, drink in the sky at leisure. Cruel memories.
The night the Rednecks died was one of viscera, but before that it was coolness on the breeze, a warmth by the fires while John played his guitar and we had only just taken two dozen kegs of lager (personal reserves) from the Atlanta despot—the man that kept his subjects as slaves and not a person among the camp was left without budding intoxication. No matter the age, everyone was invited to be merry; if it was that children too faced the plight of a bad world, then so too should they reap the moments of plenty—or so the camp figured.
John had taken a group by the fires where wagons were drawn in interlocking semicircles for cover and Jackson sat beside the picker. Jackson was a man which normally preferred quiet reflection over boisterous singing and nearly never wore the band on his throat, and yet there he was belting out the chorus at the top of his lungs, tankard in hand, red cloth blazed around his neck—it was a contagion and those drunk enough for easier embarrassment sang proudly along:
“There is power, there is power in a band of working folk!
When we stand hand in hand,
That’s a power, that’s the power,
That must rule in every land!”
I’d taken to the outlying shadows with my back pressed against the gas-powered caleche, my own tankard in hand. I loved the warmth of that great big family, truly, but even in those days—and maybe it was that queer youthfulness which longed for individualism that made me that way then—I remained as distanced as possible when I could. I sipped the lager, it was a fine drink and my brother Billy, nearly as old as I was when I’d first taken up in the infantry, swaggered to stand beside me just as quiet for minutes and we looked at the stars and he asked me what it was like to kill a man.
“Is it hard?” he asked.
I nodded, “Sometimes.”
“Killing monsters ain’t so bad. Don’t know if I could do it to a person.”
“You could if they meant to kill you; or if they meant to do it to someone you cared about,” I promised him. In those days, spry, energized, I held no time for staring into abysses; though I still wasn’t a man fully, I pretended as one. It was about family, and it was about doing what was right—what’s right seemed to change, or I changed. The world felt stark with good and evil and even later I’d feel that sentiment well up in me, but if that’s true, I know I stand more on the latter and so I intentionally obfuscated it—this I know. If not, it might be too much to bear. I was required to lie to myself and even in knowing I lied, it was better.
Billy tugged on the red kerchief around his throat and asked me how it looked on him.
“Looks good,” I said.
“Don’t think I look stupid at all?”
I smiled over my drink, “You always look stupid.” I sipped. “The neckwear’s fine.”
“Give me a break,” said Billy; he investigated his own cup, gave it a swish with his wrist, watching its contents swirl. “Aren’t you ever afraid you’ll die?”
“Sometimes—nights like this—I wouldn’t mind it.”
“Really?” my brother asked.
“There’s always a chance of it. Every moment, I guess.”
He smiled. “I wish I had that confidence.”
“You’ll get it,” I returned his smile; it was true that he would gain the fighting spirit. It came to us all with time and reminiscing on the early days, I recall the grit and the hatred—there was learning there too though. Besides, I’d seen the squalors of a stationary man. The stagnation of a place, an unmoving home.
John put his guitar away and laughter erupted from the crowd from something said and Sibylle, cowboy hat cocked funny, traipsed across the camp to the open keg for a refill; the man there, tending the cylinders, was a man named Tandy (a foreigner and one unknown besides the way he smoked a skunk pipe and told wild stories). My mother leaned over while Tandy opened the spigot mouth on the keg, and she froze there, and I could see her there cut out forever against the light of the fires; I watched, and it came so suddenly that I couldn’t be sure what’d happened at all. It was so sudden that I couldn’t find my weapon and I couldn’t find even the courage to fight because in those moments it wasn’t courage I needed, it was grounds to understand.
Sibylle came apart in two pieces immediately, torn completely through and dust erupted as her legs struck the ground while her torso spun through the air like a top, a trail of liquid trailed after, caught in the blue of night so it shone as black; she couldn’t scream. Tandy was a statue. Before anyone could react, more flesh, other bodies, went up and there was all manner of limbs which filled the ground, and it is astounding how quickly a red mist forms across the ground during a massacre. Perhaps the wails of my comrades started before, perhaps others fell before Sibylle, but I could not comprehend the goings-on till I saw her drop the way she did.
Frail human screams rose on the night; I slammed to the ground, tankard gone away and hands scrambling in the dirt; I reached up blindly and yanked Billy to my level and his expression was one of innocence, panic, tears even. Glancing around, I saw the demons bolt from the pitch-black darkness on the edges of camp, mutants taking the fore while greater creatures lurked further back, some hurled whips of gliding metal which writhed over their heads when they stretched them out for a strike—alien—and they sliced directly through soft human bodies. Not even a cry escaped me, but Billy let go with it and I slapped my cupped hand over his mouth hard to hold the screams. His voice would not have been alone anyway, not alongside that startling cacophony. Amidst the cries of people, there were the cries of horses, of our hounds.
We rolled across the ground, slipped beneath the raised body of the gas-powered caleche, remained quiet in the dark, peeked out between the wheels.
“What’s happening?” Billy whispered through my fingers; I removed my hand from him and caught a glimpse of him framed in a square of firelight through the wheels—we lay there on our bellies and the left side of his face was glazed with dirt where I’d pulled him down.
“Shh,” I told him, “Shh, please. Please.” Not another word came while I pleaded with him, pleaded with the world to make this all a nightmare.
Through the haze and the running silhouettes painted black, I saw what might have been Jackson; he stumbled and in the moment that it took me to gasp, his head was gone from his body, his torso slid on as he collapsed, came to rest mere feet from the motor wagon. I told myself that it wasn’t him, but it probably was.
Some mutants lumbered through the camp like animated corpses, some leapt with wild energy or sprayed noxious fumes which lingered in the air; others still were amalgams of humanlike limbs themselves—fiends—exhausting terrible sounds, producing smells of sulfur, glistening with whatever liquids excreted from their oblong alien orifices. Demons ran amok, chanted in devil tongued languages, laughed madly at the destruction—others still, those which displayed some greater intelligence, broke into a song I could never hope or want to replicate; it seemed a unified damnation.
“Please,” I repeated in a whimper and Billy hushed me this time and I realized we were holding hands, squeezing for dear life as figures walked the camp, speared those half-alive, elected others for twisted carnality.
In darkness, in fright plainly, we scuttled from the recess of our hiding place, kept quiet, held to each other, and went into the wasteland where nothing was—every shadow was a potential threat, every second could’ve been the last. We were holding hands; then we weren’t.
Only a glance—that’s all I afforded my brother and nothing more—what a joke of a person I am! What a coward I was. Always.
Something got him in the dark and instead of dying alongside those I cared about, I went on, heartbeat driving me till it was all that I heard in my ears and my muscles ached and my chest heaved and sweat covered me, chilled me in the breeze of the night—it was only once I’d accepted the dark completely, crawled into a hollowed space of rocks along a squat ridge that I watched the demolished camp; it seemed no larger than a spark, but the creatures, fiends and others continued their war cries; never before had I witnessed demons participate in such an attack.
I watched till the sun came, till the fires became smoke, then I watched the band of hell creatures disband. The smell of sulfur remained in the air—copper too—and I stumbled back to the camp in a dreamlike daze, totally unbelieving of the things I saw. Among those dead on the ground, I could recognize none; among those piked from rear to shoulder, standing like morbid scarecrows where they’d been steadied against the ground, I could not want to recognize.
Many of the wagons were overturned, including the gas-powered caleche and I went to it; the metal of its body was warped but I fell to the ground by it and pushed my back against the exposed undercarriage, remained frozen there while examining the bodies, the terrible strips of skin which rested places like wet sheets of paper, the piles of bones removed and smashed and piled.
I cried so deeply that oxygen became a memory, and the shakes couldn’t be contained.
It was like that for so long, knees pulled up, face pushed between, and the wails came unafraid of whatever attention they might garner; there was no rationale, but I imagine if there had been, I would’ve welcomed death in that misery. It was a deep wound that not even my own cowardice would overcome for the sake of survival.
Unaware of my surroundings, not wanting to look up from the ground between my legs, the noise which had started out as imaginary became real and I raised my head then to listen better and wipe my sore eyes; it was the sound of clip-clop horse hooves and I mildly wondered if any of the animals had been spared. I stood and pivoted around the dead camp and there it was, a man on a painted horse with golden hair; he leisurely drove the mount through the place, maneuvering around pools of blood, clumps of body parts and upon seeing me, he smiled and offered a languid wave, keeping one of his gloved hands on the reins.
The man wore white and swished his hair back upon arriving directly in front of me. Ahoy, he offered kindly, Did you happen to see the other riders?
I shook my head, feeling numb.
Ah, he said, I could have sworn four other riders, at least, passed me on my way. His gray eyes examined the carnage. Shame. He shook his head. You are?
“H-harlan.”
He nodded and nearly offered an expression of genuine condolence before descending from the horse; the animal gave a gentle grunt and wandered away from its master to inspect a nearby group of the dead. The man offered his hand, and I took it in a shake. Mephisto, said the man. He flashed a smile again before his face grew serious. I’ve come to you to deal.
I shot him a questioning look, one of bafflement.
I heard your calls from far off. He nodded, removed a white handkerchief from his breast pocket and swiped it down his face. Hot out. He shrugged then replaced the cloth in his pocket. This, he motioned to the disarray of vehicles, of bodies, I can’t fix all this—it’s too much—but there’s a person you love, I know. I could bring them back.
“Doctor?” In retrospect it was such a naïve question.
He shook his head.
“Angel?”
He grinned and nodded, Sure.
“Demon?”
Undoubtedly. His eyes—pits of gray in that radiant face—nearly expressed solemness; he daintily shook the hair from his face and looked at his steed which sniffed a corpse. What’s the word, Harlan? There are others calling and I must be on my way soon—I can’t dally. There was a sharpness to the words. Can’t dally. We must convene soon, or I’ll mosey on.
I snorted back the clog in my nose from the tears and wiped my eyes with my sleeves. “Okay.”
Deal?
I nodded, “Deal.”
Sleep tonight, said Mephisto, Sleep and you’ll be rewarded in the morning.
“You said it’s a deal.”
He nodded and scanned the carnage before we matched gazes and then he said, Yes?
“What is it you want from me?”
Nothing you need now. He called the horse, and it came, and he swept his feet quickly from the ground and settled into position atop the animal. Sleep, Harlan. You won’t be bothered. There are worse things still over the horizon.
I watched him go till he disappeared and once he was gone, I couldn’t cry anymore and instead rummaged through the wagons for what I might carry; along the way I found John, face twisted but corpse intact. The body from the previous night that I’d guessed was Jackson couldn’t be determined but I found him nowhere else. I slid Sibylle’s holster from her hips, fell hard onto the ground and found that I could sob more. I took her cowboy hat, placed it on my head and held her pistol in one hand and the belt holster dangled from the other while I searched the other bodies; there were so many, but I could not find Billy.
Waiting for darkness, I took the spot where I rested, back against the caleche’s undercarriage, watched the sky and felt the gun in my hand; it was heavy. I put it to my head, closed my eyes, and whispered affirmations to myself then I put the pistol between my splayed legs, watched it still in the dirt, and pulled the hat down over my eyes but it did little for the smell. Though the brim of the hat cut the sky out, I watched the ground and saw circling shadows form overhead and heard calls of turkey vultures; they came to pick over the bodies. I withdrew my knees to my chest there again and laid my forearm across them and bit into my arm while closing my eyes. I had thought I was a man and for a time, maybe I was, but there in that miserable pit of despair I became a child again and if I’d become more delirious, I’m sure I might’ve called out for Jackson like it was a bad dream.
Into a fading stupor of sleep in the sun I went and when I awoke again it was dark and chilly and I was tired and hungry but too sick to eat and hardly strong enough to move; I looked at the gun and put it into its holster and left it there by the caleche. In the light of the moon and stars, I moved to gather a bolt of canvas; I unfurled the fabric and created a leaning shelter against the overturned vehicle and crawled into it. There was a hole in the canvas, and I peeked out at the stars.
Weeping came again, but not so uproarious; I was stuck there letting go of whimpers, lying on my back, feeling the tears trace in lines from the outer corners of my eyes to collect along my earlobes. In time, I fell to sleep again on the hard ground because the mourning had taken all else from me.
A pinpoint of sunlight broke my eyelids and I jerked awake and reached for the holster, but it was gone. So was the hat. I crawled from the leaning shelter and there he was.
Billy stood plainly among the dried, congealed blood-soaked field and he looked on to the horizon and all shadows were long in the midday sun which hung up there in a soft blue sky. Whether it be a dream or a spell, I couldn’t care—I charged to him and spun him so he faced me and though his face was plain and expressionless, I wrapped him into a forceful hug. He placed his hands on my back and gave a gentle squeeze; when I pulled from him, my hands on his shoulders, I saw he held Sibylle’s hat in his left hand, pinched by the brim; he’d already tugged her holster belt around his hips—he could have it all. I shook while holding him then let go to wipe my face.
“You’re alive,” I nodded.
He nodded without speaking then looked at the hat in his hand and placed it on his head and firmly pressed it down.
“Billy! Hell, you’re alive!”
The corners of his mouth twitched upward for a moment then he nodded again. “Yeah.” His eyes curiously searched our surroundings like he meant to take each detail in forever.
I slapped him on the shoulder and almost squealed. “Goddammit.” I wiped my eyes again and could do little to keep the excitement from exploding from me. “Oh, we should go. We should go on and get somewhere safe.”
He nodded toward the horizon, “’Lanta?”
“Sure.”
We packed and it was a like an ethereal phantom remained among us beside the quiet dead; turkey vultures cawed to break the silence, pecked where they pleased on the bodies, and I couldn’t want to fight them. I kept sidelong eyes on Billy with the ever-present worry that he’d vanish. Perhaps he was the phantom.
From the rear of the caleche, I removed a few sentimental books Jackson liked, essential cookware, and sparse rations for the trek. The last thing I grabbed was my shotgun and a bit of ammo.
As we set from the dead place, the terrible silhouettes that were cut from there on the horizon behind us grew in my mind with every backward glance—I wanted to fall to pieces, but I saw Billy walk alongside me and although contented is not the right word, it is the nearest. The steps of our boots were all that was heard because I could not fathom to pierce the space between us with words for fear that it would all end. It was a dream, surely. I’d lost my mind. With my hands thumbed into the straps of my pack, I saw I my hands still shook, and they would shake a lot longer—years and with memories too. The crunch of earth underfoot became a rhythm and instead of looking at my brother, I watched his shadow on the ground.
“Everyone’s dead?” He asked.
“Yeah.”
“You’re sure?”
“Yeah,” I repeated.
“How ain’t I? How ain’t you?”
To say that it was luck would’ve been too morbid. Instead of saying anything, I shrugged, kicked a loose stone, watched my feet some more, and felt a queasiness come over me. For the moment, the immeasurable deaths of those I’d left behind were forgotten in the company of my brother and a sickness welled up inside of me so suddenly that I felt that I’d fall to pieces at the slightest provocation. Finally, I did speak again, but only after steeling myself to the troubles, “Yeah, how are you alive?”
Billy shrugged at me then stumbled up a hill which overlooked trash wood wilderness where sticks lay twisted and bare and further on the sight of Atlanta was visible and I cupped a hand across my brow and Billy did the same and we looked on at the shadows of the place out there where strings of smoke rose from the skyline as a signature for the desolation of the city; it was dead. I felt it in my bones.
My hands were light while my head was heavy, my throat was dry, and the entire world seized in moments of stillness or perhaps it was my own vision which construed the world in that way; I took to the small hill which Billy had climbed and sat there and stared at the place between my feet to steady myself.
“Fire,” said Billy.
I nodded and nearly choked.
Leviathan—till then I had no belief in dragons—glided over the broken city, its winged shadow little seen but its voice was deep across the scene, letting go of roars which shook the ground. We hid among the trash wood and moved down the hill and watched the creature thrash in the air as if it was angry for its abominable life. Whatever millennia it spent in the pits of hell seemingly thrust upon it a love of destruction and pain.
My brother moved with a more assured stride and kept a cool distance and upon fleeing from the wreckage, from the outlying area of Atlanta and the place we’d left our family, he spoke little and watched me strangely whenever I took to melancholic fatiguing. We lit no fires for fear of what it could draw from the night so in the dark I’d see him watching some far-off place, maybe seeing through the reality which surrounded us, and he’d snap from it, catch my eye, and disappear for minutes to scan the perimeter of whatever place we stayed. Being alongside my resurrected brother was lonelier than I could bear, and I hoped he’d disappear for good or that I could work up the courage to end my own life. It was like purgatory explained in books and for a time, it felt endless; upon witnessing the destruction of Atlanta, we pushed to Marrietta, and it was much the same. As was Chatanooga, Nashville, Knoxville, Louisville, Charlotte. The ocean had risen so that Fayetville was gone underwater, and the Florida leg disappeared completely as far as I’m aware. I understood later that Memphis was overlooked and more places further west were alive too, but when we’d exhausted the south, we moved north and found strongholds of families or traders or even small groupings of civilization, but by and large we found nothing much in the two years that we hoofed it from place to place; it was my doing mostly—I wanted to find a place untouched by the mayhem in the area my family had once patrolled.
In retrospect, I am certain that Billy only stayed by my side for convenience; there wasn’t any of my brother left in the man that was my travelling companion for that time. He was a ghost of a person and Mephisto had preyed upon my desire in the worst moment of weakness in my life. There were nights—maybe we’d taken up in a natural alcove for shelter or we’d locked ourselves in some ancient structure for sleep—I’d watch Billy lay where he was, Sibylle’s hat and holster lying beside him, and I’d think of putting him down but he’d stir and in a brief shadow I’d see my brother as he’d been and withdraw to bury my face in fake sleep to be met with images of the night the demons attacked where I’d shake, sweat, and bite my lips so hard I’d drink blood.
Two years we marched around the Appalachians and in that time, I felt myself wither and disconnect.
Upon moving further north we met Indianapolis—that’s what it was called back then—and it was run by an older woman called Lady Lazarus; I reckon her father, affluent and dead, was a fan of Plath. Indianapolis was fortified more than most with its high walls, and its wall men, and its underground facilities which produced substantial ammunition. We—me and Billy’s revenant—were travelling with a group of traders we’d taken up with from out west; they called themselves wizards and although they seemed of the occult, their spirits discounted whatever suspicions I might’ve had of them.
I remember first pushing through that big gate; the town kept with it an indisputable malaise and though we were greeted at the gate by the leader Lady Lazarus—her brothers came along with her—and her jovial demeanor carried a certain infectious quality, I could not help but notice that the regular denizens maintained a healthy distance from their leader (the guards which followed the Lady everywhere probably had something to do with this).
Lady Lazarus touched each of our hands in greeting with enthusiasm and I could not help but notice how soft they were, how vibrant her eyes were, how much she smiled, and how beautiful she was given her age; already her head was fully gray.
Upon meeting each of us, going through the wizard traders first, she came to me, and Billy and she shook my hand then pivoted to Billy.
“Welcome. You can call me Lady.”
Billy caught her hand in his, held it longer than she’d intended so that they held eye contact, and he smiled broadly, tipped the cowboy hat on his head back to expose his smooth forehead and said, “And you can call me Maron, mam. You are quite a sight for a tired man.”
Though Maron—as he’d named himself—was more boy than man, Lady took a disturbed liking to him immediately and we prolonged our stay in Indianapolis after the wizards departed to head west.
Under the rule of Lady, Indianapolis was a theocracy, with her addressing the huddled masses at the steps of her grand abode, she’d preach for hours on sin and strife and quote her favorite passages; though reminiscent of my time with the Rednecks, I never found any truth or sincerity or freedom in her teaching—hers was more trouble, brimstone, fire and I’d had enough of that for a lifetime. Public execution was common. As was torture.
Maron distanced himself further from me, but I remained to keep an eye on him—it was not sentimentality but rather I existed without purpose and conjured some from watching my brother.
Often, Lady invited Maron to her private rooms and though the rumors and speculation ran the full spectrum of perverse speculation, every denizen feigned ignorance at her pregnancy.
Upon giving birth, the infant was malformed with two heads—her brothers took this as an omen and killed the child, put their leader in the stocks for months, and stripped her of dignity while the denizens did to her what they pleased.
Maron rose through the wall men while Lady’s brothers assumed control of Indianapolis and called themselves Bosses; in the time since Lady’s reign, the place was renamed to Golgotha for its closeness to a messiah.
I went west but always found myself drawn back to Golgotha because of some emptiness in me. It was only with Suzanne that I wanted something more and knowing them, I almost believed in a world like the one that children dream about. The world that Gemma and Andrew chased after when they left home, like the one Aggie talked about in her mother’s books. There’s a hopelessness in me that I’ll never be rid of. In the interim between our initial arrival to Golgotha and that flight from that terrible city, I cannot know how many people I sacrificed in convening with demons because I refuse to know because the number would destroy me. That is the worst of it; I do not even have courage enough to face myself or the actions of my past in any substantive way.
Mephisto tainted me so that I could speak with his kind as a dealmaker and the disease grew.
Billy or Maron or whatever he is should have been reaped long ago or better, I should never have brought that abomination alive. Such a cruel world where a deep longing like that can be inverted, weaponized. Me and him should both die; me and him should have died a long time ago.
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2024.05.17 09:21 Carpet_Redd214 2 steps ruined the next 6 months of my life
 | I haven’t been able to find a similar story so I’m sharing for anyone who in the future does, or for anyone who has suggestions and comments. on the job injury, workers comp involved submitted by Carpet_Redd214 to KneeInjuries [link] [comments] 4/23 I had on chest high waders walking through waist deep water in a bayou collecting samples. Long story short, I tripped and fell, sliced my knee from side to side, down to the bone I would later find out, on an unknown object under water. I could not bear any weight on my left knee at this point and I could feel the warmth from it bleeding. Fast forward over first aid and transport..(Nightmare) Hospital performed an x-ray, flushed it out (OUCH), sutured approx 15 internal and surface stitches and told me I possibly cut the patellar tendon. I could not move or raise my leg still. They wrapped it up sent me home with crutches and told me to see a specialist asap. No pain medicine.. gosh that was rough! And ER doctors aren’t the nicest. Between the 24th and May 8th, I traveled back home, found a doctor, had an initial visit with a general doctor and then an orthopedic doctor. An MRI was taken, and pain medication prescribed. thank god! The MRI results showed a 90% to near complete rupture of the patellar tendon, more like completely severed, and an acute fracture somewhere, can’t remember the exact terminology. Surgery is/was the only option for repair. May 8th surgery day- Surgeon reused the same laceration for repair. He mentioned it was a clean cut and whatever was under water was SHARP. I Was sent home with a brace with 60% extension. No weight bearing for 2 weeks or until follow up, and to not use my quad muscle as much as possible. Oh and I was able to bonus an ice water machine. Game changer for sure! I am about 8 days post surgery and the pain has been real! But the boredom, confinement, and lack of independence has been even more challenging! Tough actually. I’m normally a physically active person with a physically demanding job, so all this down time has been tough. The pain medicine makes me itch like crazy and drowsy so I don’t like taking them. BUT the pain really catches up if I don’t take them. I’m in this constant battle of do I wanna be groggy and snooze all day or be awake and suffer though the pain. Questions I have: will I heal similar to a tear? Is my type of injury worse or better in terms of healing and long term health? Does anyone else have muscle spasms I their quad, mine ache like crazy? What about recovery.. when can I sit in a chair normally again?!!!! Any recommendations oh how to work from home on a computer when I can’t bend my knee to sit down?? Any suggestions, comments, or fun stories are appreciated! |
2024.05.17 09:19 Im-That-Housewife What does it take to get a doctor to take my pain seriously?
Dear doctors of reddit or parents with ANY CLUE what to do, I am at a loss now and need to know what I must do to get any doctor to help.
I was diagnosed with scoliosis at 10 with an "S" curve at 31 degrees by one surgeon. He said I didn't need a brace nor surgery no matter how much my mother talked to him.
2 years later I had transferred to a new surgeon at a 51 degree angle at the time of my first spinal fusion (waist to neck) and a correctional (waist to halfway up spine) 4 years later due to back pain and problems walking.
Age 19 - Now (25)
I began having back pain again which triggered the idea of needing a correctional and these problems were lessened for a very short while until about 19 when a specific part of my lower back begin to hurt. I have sharp pain in my back from sitting or standing to long, walking to far, or twisting. I have gone to multiple doctors who have brushed off my pain as it became worse and debilitating to a point that my husband has had to assist me in and out of a bath or bed at times since I was 22. Now that I am pregnant, I just got released from the hospital after having my right leg completely give out, now barely able to walk, in horrible pain and the 5 doctors I saw there are pinning it on either "Nothing's showing in the scans, so there's nothing wrong. That's good." (I CAN'T WALK WITHOUT A WALKER) or "It's just worse cause of your pregnancy."
While I agree, it may be worse cause of my pregnancy, I have not had the ability to function in my everyday life on my own since 19 and it has only worsened since 22. I have brought in paper work, showed the medical history, and switched doctors many times to try to get help.
submitted by Im-That-Housewife to Advice [link] [comments]
Backstory:
Ages 10, 12, and 17I was diagnosed with scoliosis at 10 with an "S" curve at 31 degrees by one surgeon. He said I didn't need a brace nor surgery no matter how much my mother talked to him.
2 years later I had transferred to a new surgeon at a 51 degree angle at the time of my first spinal fusion (waist to neck) and a correctional (waist to halfway up spine) 4 years later due to back pain and problems walking.
Age 19 - Now (25)
I began having back pain again which triggered the idea of needing a correctional and these problems were lessened for a very short while until about 19 when a specific part of my lower back begin to hurt. I have sharp pain in my back from sitting or standing to long, walking to far, or twisting. I have gone to multiple doctors who have brushed off my pain as it became worse and debilitating to a point that my husband has had to assist me in and out of a bath or bed at times since I was 22. Now that I am pregnant, I just got released from the hospital after having my right leg completely give out, now barely able to walk, in horrible pain and the 5 doctors I saw there are pinning it on either "Nothing's showing in the scans, so there's nothing wrong. That's good." (I CAN'T WALK WITHOUT A WALKER) or "It's just worse cause of your pregnancy."
While I agree, it may be worse cause of my pregnancy, I have not had the ability to function in my everyday life on my own since 19 and it has only worsened since 22. I have brought in paper work, showed the medical history, and switched doctors many times to try to get help.
Question
What do I have to do to get a doctor that will take my pain seriously? I cannot function anymore and after I have a child, I doubt it will be any better. Hasn't gotten better in 6 years.2024.05.17 09:07 drambikachestclinic What are the common causes of chest pain?
Chest pain can arise from various conditions, some of which are serious and require immediate medical attention, while others are less severe. Here are some common causes of chest pain:
submitted by drambikachestclinic to u/drambikachestclinic [link] [comments]
Cardiac Causes
- Angina
- Chest pain due to reduced blood flow to the heart muscle, often triggered by physical activity or stress.
- Myocardial Infarction (Heart Attack)
- Severe, crushing chest pain due to the blockage of blood flow to a part of the heart muscle.
- Pericarditis
- Inflammation of the pericardium (the sac surrounding the heart), causing sharp, stabbing pain.
- Myocarditis
- Inflammation of the heart muscle, often leading to chest pain, fatigue, and shortness of breath.
- Aortic Dissection
- A tear in the inner layer of the aorta, causing severe, ripping chest pain.
Gastrointestinal Causes
- Gastroesophageal Reflux Disease (GERD)
- Acid reflux causing a burning sensation in the chest, often after eating.
- Esophageal Spasm
- Sudden, intense contractions of the esophagus leading to chest pain.
- Peptic Ulcer
- Sores in the stomach lining causing burning pain that can be mistaken for heart pain.
- Gallbladder Disease (e.g., Gallstones)
- Pain from gallbladder issues can radiate to the chest.
Pulmonary Causes
- Pulmonary Embolism
- A blood clot in the lung causing sharp chest pain, shortness of breath, and rapid heart rate.
- Pneumonia
- Infection of the lungs leading to chest pain, fever, and difficulty breathing.
- Pleuritis (Pleurisy)
- Inflammation of the lining of the lungs, causing sharp pain, especially with breathing or coughing.
- Pneumothorax (Collapsed Lung)
- Sudden onset of sharp, one-sided chest pain and shortness of breath.
Musculoskeletal Causes
- Costochondritis
- Inflammation of the cartilage connecting ribs to the breastbone, causing sharp pain.
- Muscle Strain
- Overuse or injury to chest muscles can cause persistent pain.
- Rib Fractures
- Broken ribs from trauma can cause significant chest pain, especially when breathing deeply or coughing.
Psychological Causes
- Panic Attack
- Intense anxiety or panic leading to chest pain, rapid heartbeat, and shortness of breath.
- Anxiety
- Chronic anxiety can cause chest tightness and discomfort.
Other Causes
- Herpes Zoster (Shingles)
- A reactivation of the chickenpox virus causing a painful rash and chest pain if the chest area is affected.
- Hiatal Hernia
- Part of the stomach pushes up through the diaphragm, causing chest pain and discomfort.
2024.05.17 08:35 Jaded_Being_1462 How do you feel about the English translation of LOTM
Until I started subtitling the audiobook, I never considered reading the English version of LOTM. To my surprise, the quality of the English translation seems somewhat 'disrespectful' to the original book. With the money Qidian made from it, they should have hired at least one English literature graduate, if not three English literature professors, to proofread it.
Even though I'm not a native English speaker, I couldn't resist the urge to translate some parts in my own way. One thing led to another, and now I have a brand new translation of Chapter One.
Now, I have a question for my fellow fans of LTOM:
Ouch!
Ow…ouch!
Ow…my head is killing me!
The fantastic yet surreal dream surrounded by whispering and murmuring shattered away instantly, Zhou Mingrui who was sound asleep felt an abrupt throbbing pain deep inside his head, as if his head were ruthlessly clubbed. No, it felt more like something sharp penetrated his temple, followed by twisting and stirring.
Feeling disoriented, Zhou Mingrui wanted to turn around, clutch his head, or sit up. Yet, unable to move his hands or feet, he felt like he had lost all control over his body.
Looks like I’m still in some sort of dream, didn’t really wake up… Moments later, I might even think I'm fully awake, only to realize I'm still asleep… Familiar with such experiences, Zhou Mingrui tried desperately to concentrate, hoping to break free from the grip of darkness and disorientation.
However, trapped between wakefulness and sleep, the willpower was as elusive as smoke, difficult to control and concentrate. Despite his efforts, his thoughts kept wandering wildly, with all sorts of ideas coming and going.
How could I suddenly have a headache out of nowhere in the middle of the night?
Especially one which hurts so badly!
Could it be something like a cerebral hemorrhage?
Damn, am I going to die at such a young age?
Wake up! Wake UP!
Huh? Doesn't feel as painful now? Although it still feels like a blunt knife is cutting through my brains…
Sure thing is, I won’t be able to fall asleep any more. How am I supposed to show up for work tomorrow?
Why even bother going to work? This is a legitimate headache, perfect for time off! And no need to worry about the manager's grumblings.
Put it this way, it’s not so bad after all. Yea, free time off for me!
In between the waves of throbbing pain, Zhou Mingrui gradually accumulated a sense of elusive strength. Finally, with a determined effort, he straightened his back and opened his eyes, breaking free from the state of half-sleep and half-wake.
His vision was blurry at first, then tinged with a faint crimson hue. In his line of sight, Zhou Mingrui saw a sturdy wooden desk, upon which lay an open notebook. The papers were rough and yellowed. Where the title supposed to be, there was a sentence written in strange characters, with eye-catching thick, dark ink that seemed ready to drip.
To the left of the notebook, along the edge of the desk, was a stack of seven or eight neatly arranged books. On the wall to their right, were grayish-white pipes inset into the wall, with wall lamps at their ends.
The lamps had a classical Western style, about half the size of an adult's head. It featured a transparent inner layer made of glass and an exterior grid made of black metal.
Diagonally beneath the unlit lamp, was a black ink bottle shrouded in a pale red glow.
On its embossed surface was a blurry angel figure.
In front of the ink bottle and to the right of the notebook, lay a dark-colored pen with a fully circular body. Its tip shimmered with a faint glint while its cap rested right beside a brass revolver.
A gun?
A revolver?
Zhou Mingrui was completely taken aback. Everything in front of him felt absolutely alien, nothing looked like his own room.
Shocked and confused, he came to the realization that the desk, the notebook, the ink bottle, and the revolve were all coated with a layer of crimson “veil” from the light shining through the window.
Without realizing what he was doing, he raised his head, looking up bit by bit.
In the midair, beyond the heavy smooth darkness, hung a crimson full moon, glowing silently.
Hiss… Zhou Mingrui felt inexplicably horrified, as he stood up abruptly. However, before he could fully straighten his knees, a throbbing pain struck his head, draining all his strength. He fell, with his buttocks slammed heavily back onto the burly wood chair.
The pain didn’t stop him for a moment. Zhou Mingrui popped up, turned around in a fluster, and began examining his surroundings.
The room was not big, with a brown door on both of his sides. Against the wall in front of him, was a wooden bunk bed. Between the bed and the door to the left was a cabinet with two opposing doors and five drawers beneath them.
Next to the cabinet was a pipe of the same grayish-white, inset into the wall at the height of a person. What distinct it is that it connected to a strange looking mechanical device, which had a few of gears and bearings exposed here and there.
Items resembling coal stoves, sat in the right corner of the room near the desk, along with some kitchenware such as soup pots and iron pans.
Through the right door, was a dressing mirror with a couple of cracks, standing on a wooden base emboss with simple plain patterns.
While looking around, Zhou Mingrui noticed himself in the mirror, the present him.
Dark hair, brown eyes, wearing a linen shirt, slim, average-looking features and a rather deep outline…
Hiss… Zhou Mingrui grasped the situation immediately as many helpless and confused thoughts surfaced in his mind.
The revolver, the classical European style decorations, as well as the crimson moon that looked nothing like Earth's moon—all of them were screaming the exact same thing.
Who am I?
C-could I have transmigrated?
Zhou Mingrui's mouth slowly opened wider and wider, bit by bit.
He had grown up reading web novels, even fantasized about such scenes from time to time. However, the fantasy was incredibly difficult to accept now that he found himself in one.
Classic "Talk? Yes, yes! Action? No, no!", isn’t it?
In less than a minute, Zhou Mingrui had already started to sarcastically critique, attempting to make the best of whatever situation he found himself in.
But for the throbbing headache forcing him to think fast and sharply, he would for sure be convinced that he was dreaming.
Easy, easy, easy…taking deep breaths, Zhou Mingrui was trying really hard to make himself to calm down.
Just as his mind and body began to relax, pieces of memories started to flush, slowly flooding into his consciousness.
Klein Moretti.
A citizen of the City of Tingen, Awwa County, Loen Kingdom in the Northern Continent
Recently graduated from the Department of History at Khoy University…
His father was a sergeant of the Imperial Army, who had sacrificed his life during a colonial ware with the Southern Continent. His bereavement allowance made it possible for Klein to study at a private literature school, paving the way for his admission into university…
His mother was a devotee of the Evernight Goddess, who passed away the year Klein passed the entrance examinations to Khoy University…
He also had an elder brother and a younger sister, living together in a two-bedroom apartment.
Their family was far from wealthy, and its financial situation could even be described as somewhat strained.
Currently, the family was supported solely by the elder brother who worked as a clerk at an import and export company …
As a college graduate majored in history, Klein was proficient in the ancient language of Feysac, considering the origin of all languages in the Northern Continent, as well as the language of Hermes, which was commonly found in ancient mausoleums and often associated with sacrificial scenes and praying rituals.
Hermes?!
Zhou Mingrui's mind started to race as he reached out to rub his throbbing temples.
He cast his gaze toward the desk at the opened notebook, but to realize that the strange looking characters on the yellowed paper started to look somewhat familiar, then increasingly recognizable, and finally comprehensible.
It was a statement written in Hermes!
The thick, dark ink, seemingly ready to drip, read:
“Everyone will die including me myself!”
Hiss! Zhou Mingrui felt inexplicably horrified. He instinctively leaned back, attempting to escape away from the notebook, and the ominous statement on it.
Being so weak, he almost fell down, but managed to extend his hands in a fluster to grasp the edge of the desk.
He felt that air around him air started to roar, filled with faint whispering and murmurings. It felt just like listening to horror stories told by elders when he was young.
He shook his head, telling himself that all these were nothing but an illusion. Getting back onto his feet, he looked away from the notebook while still breathing heavily.
This time, his sight landed on the shimmering brass revolver, immediately realizing something unexplainable.
With Klein's social status, in what universe he would have the money or access to buy a revolver?!
Zhou Mingrui couldn't help but furrow his brow. Deeply puzzled, his eyes were caught by a reddish handprint at the edge of the desk, which was even darker than the moonlight, as well as thicker than the “veil”.
It was a bloody handprint!
A bloody handprint?
Zhou Mingrui instinctly flipped his right hand, that was pushing against the edge of the desk. Looking at it, he saw his palm and fingers covered in blood.
In the meaning time, the throbbing pain was getting a little bit better, yet didn’t go away, binding him like one tie after another.
Did I smash and injure my head? Zhou Mingrui guessed as he turned around, walking towards the cracked dressing mirror. After just a few of steps, a medium build figure of dark hair and brown eyes appeared clearly in front of him. The person had a distinct scholarly air to him.
Is this the present me?
Klein Moretti?
Zhou Mingrui was stunned. The poor lighting of the night obscured his vision, preventing him from clearly discerning something he had noticed. He continued forward until he was just a step away from colliding with the mirror.
Illumined by the crimson veil-like moonlight, he turned his head and began to examine the side of his forehead. A clear reflection appeared in the mirror. There, no his temple, was a grotesque wound with burn marks around the edges, blood staining the surrounding area. Grayish-white brain matter was slowly seeping out from within.
submitted by Jaded_Being_1462 to LordofTheMysteries [link] [comments]
Even though I'm not a native English speaker, I couldn't resist the urge to translate some parts in my own way. One thing led to another, and now I have a brand new translation of Chapter One.
Now, I have a question for my fellow fans of LTOM:
- Do you think this is a much better translation that you would like to wait and use it for subtitling LOTM's audiobooks? Or
- Do you feel the difference is so minimal that you'd prefer me to use the original translation so I can release subtitled audiobooks faster?
Ouch!
Ow…ouch!
Ow…my head is killing me!
The fantastic yet surreal dream surrounded by whispering and murmuring shattered away instantly, Zhou Mingrui who was sound asleep felt an abrupt throbbing pain deep inside his head, as if his head were ruthlessly clubbed. No, it felt more like something sharp penetrated his temple, followed by twisting and stirring.
Feeling disoriented, Zhou Mingrui wanted to turn around, clutch his head, or sit up. Yet, unable to move his hands or feet, he felt like he had lost all control over his body.
Looks like I’m still in some sort of dream, didn’t really wake up… Moments later, I might even think I'm fully awake, only to realize I'm still asleep… Familiar with such experiences, Zhou Mingrui tried desperately to concentrate, hoping to break free from the grip of darkness and disorientation.
However, trapped between wakefulness and sleep, the willpower was as elusive as smoke, difficult to control and concentrate. Despite his efforts, his thoughts kept wandering wildly, with all sorts of ideas coming and going.
How could I suddenly have a headache out of nowhere in the middle of the night?
Especially one which hurts so badly!
Could it be something like a cerebral hemorrhage?
Damn, am I going to die at such a young age?
Wake up! Wake UP!
Huh? Doesn't feel as painful now? Although it still feels like a blunt knife is cutting through my brains…
Sure thing is, I won’t be able to fall asleep any more. How am I supposed to show up for work tomorrow?
Why even bother going to work? This is a legitimate headache, perfect for time off! And no need to worry about the manager's grumblings.
Put it this way, it’s not so bad after all. Yea, free time off for me!
In between the waves of throbbing pain, Zhou Mingrui gradually accumulated a sense of elusive strength. Finally, with a determined effort, he straightened his back and opened his eyes, breaking free from the state of half-sleep and half-wake.
His vision was blurry at first, then tinged with a faint crimson hue. In his line of sight, Zhou Mingrui saw a sturdy wooden desk, upon which lay an open notebook. The papers were rough and yellowed. Where the title supposed to be, there was a sentence written in strange characters, with eye-catching thick, dark ink that seemed ready to drip.
To the left of the notebook, along the edge of the desk, was a stack of seven or eight neatly arranged books. On the wall to their right, were grayish-white pipes inset into the wall, with wall lamps at their ends.
The lamps had a classical Western style, about half the size of an adult's head. It featured a transparent inner layer made of glass and an exterior grid made of black metal.
Diagonally beneath the unlit lamp, was a black ink bottle shrouded in a pale red glow.
On its embossed surface was a blurry angel figure.
In front of the ink bottle and to the right of the notebook, lay a dark-colored pen with a fully circular body. Its tip shimmered with a faint glint while its cap rested right beside a brass revolver.
A gun?
A revolver?
Zhou Mingrui was completely taken aback. Everything in front of him felt absolutely alien, nothing looked like his own room.
Shocked and confused, he came to the realization that the desk, the notebook, the ink bottle, and the revolve were all coated with a layer of crimson “veil” from the light shining through the window.
Without realizing what he was doing, he raised his head, looking up bit by bit.
In the midair, beyond the heavy smooth darkness, hung a crimson full moon, glowing silently.
Hiss… Zhou Mingrui felt inexplicably horrified, as he stood up abruptly. However, before he could fully straighten his knees, a throbbing pain struck his head, draining all his strength. He fell, with his buttocks slammed heavily back onto the burly wood chair.
The pain didn’t stop him for a moment. Zhou Mingrui popped up, turned around in a fluster, and began examining his surroundings.
The room was not big, with a brown door on both of his sides. Against the wall in front of him, was a wooden bunk bed. Between the bed and the door to the left was a cabinet with two opposing doors and five drawers beneath them.
Next to the cabinet was a pipe of the same grayish-white, inset into the wall at the height of a person. What distinct it is that it connected to a strange looking mechanical device, which had a few of gears and bearings exposed here and there.
Items resembling coal stoves, sat in the right corner of the room near the desk, along with some kitchenware such as soup pots and iron pans.
Through the right door, was a dressing mirror with a couple of cracks, standing on a wooden base emboss with simple plain patterns.
While looking around, Zhou Mingrui noticed himself in the mirror, the present him.
Dark hair, brown eyes, wearing a linen shirt, slim, average-looking features and a rather deep outline…
Hiss… Zhou Mingrui grasped the situation immediately as many helpless and confused thoughts surfaced in his mind.
The revolver, the classical European style decorations, as well as the crimson moon that looked nothing like Earth's moon—all of them were screaming the exact same thing.
Who am I?
C-could I have transmigrated?
Zhou Mingrui's mouth slowly opened wider and wider, bit by bit.
He had grown up reading web novels, even fantasized about such scenes from time to time. However, the fantasy was incredibly difficult to accept now that he found himself in one.
Classic "Talk? Yes, yes! Action? No, no!", isn’t it?
In less than a minute, Zhou Mingrui had already started to sarcastically critique, attempting to make the best of whatever situation he found himself in.
But for the throbbing headache forcing him to think fast and sharply, he would for sure be convinced that he was dreaming.
Easy, easy, easy…taking deep breaths, Zhou Mingrui was trying really hard to make himself to calm down.
Just as his mind and body began to relax, pieces of memories started to flush, slowly flooding into his consciousness.
Klein Moretti.
A citizen of the City of Tingen, Awwa County, Loen Kingdom in the Northern Continent
Recently graduated from the Department of History at Khoy University…
His father was a sergeant of the Imperial Army, who had sacrificed his life during a colonial ware with the Southern Continent. His bereavement allowance made it possible for Klein to study at a private literature school, paving the way for his admission into university…
His mother was a devotee of the Evernight Goddess, who passed away the year Klein passed the entrance examinations to Khoy University…
He also had an elder brother and a younger sister, living together in a two-bedroom apartment.
Their family was far from wealthy, and its financial situation could even be described as somewhat strained.
Currently, the family was supported solely by the elder brother who worked as a clerk at an import and export company …
As a college graduate majored in history, Klein was proficient in the ancient language of Feysac, considering the origin of all languages in the Northern Continent, as well as the language of Hermes, which was commonly found in ancient mausoleums and often associated with sacrificial scenes and praying rituals.
Hermes?!
Zhou Mingrui's mind started to race as he reached out to rub his throbbing temples.
He cast his gaze toward the desk at the opened notebook, but to realize that the strange looking characters on the yellowed paper started to look somewhat familiar, then increasingly recognizable, and finally comprehensible.
It was a statement written in Hermes!
The thick, dark ink, seemingly ready to drip, read:
“Everyone will die including me myself!”
Hiss! Zhou Mingrui felt inexplicably horrified. He instinctively leaned back, attempting to escape away from the notebook, and the ominous statement on it.
Being so weak, he almost fell down, but managed to extend his hands in a fluster to grasp the edge of the desk.
He felt that air around him air started to roar, filled with faint whispering and murmurings. It felt just like listening to horror stories told by elders when he was young.
He shook his head, telling himself that all these were nothing but an illusion. Getting back onto his feet, he looked away from the notebook while still breathing heavily.
This time, his sight landed on the shimmering brass revolver, immediately realizing something unexplainable.
With Klein's social status, in what universe he would have the money or access to buy a revolver?!
Zhou Mingrui couldn't help but furrow his brow. Deeply puzzled, his eyes were caught by a reddish handprint at the edge of the desk, which was even darker than the moonlight, as well as thicker than the “veil”.
It was a bloody handprint!
A bloody handprint?
Zhou Mingrui instinctly flipped his right hand, that was pushing against the edge of the desk. Looking at it, he saw his palm and fingers covered in blood.
In the meaning time, the throbbing pain was getting a little bit better, yet didn’t go away, binding him like one tie after another.
Did I smash and injure my head? Zhou Mingrui guessed as he turned around, walking towards the cracked dressing mirror. After just a few of steps, a medium build figure of dark hair and brown eyes appeared clearly in front of him. The person had a distinct scholarly air to him.
Is this the present me?
Klein Moretti?
Zhou Mingrui was stunned. The poor lighting of the night obscured his vision, preventing him from clearly discerning something he had noticed. He continued forward until he was just a step away from colliding with the mirror.
Illumined by the crimson veil-like moonlight, he turned his head and began to examine the side of his forehead. A clear reflection appeared in the mirror. There, no his temple, was a grotesque wound with burn marks around the edges, blood staining the surrounding area. Grayish-white brain matter was slowly seeping out from within.
2024.05.17 08:30 BeemerBear07 Injured my knee right before sweepers.
Took advantage of all the free practice games people were giving me 3wks ago. Then wham, sharp pain at the back of my knee, and my knee is swollen.
It felt like it was getting better. Bowled league on Tuesday and it was fine. Wednesday, putting on my bowling shoes for another league, stood up and almost fell because the pain appeared again and I couldn't straighen my leg for a few seconds. Yup, swollen knee again. Not sure if it's a sciatic nerve or just typical "overuse" because of all the sliding.
Hobbling all over my house trying to pack because I need to drive up to Vegas for sweepers this weekend and I'm annoyed at myself. I suppose I'll be walking up to the foul line very gingerly and just hope for the best lol.
End of rant
submitted by BeemerBear07 to Bowling [link] [comments]
It felt like it was getting better. Bowled league on Tuesday and it was fine. Wednesday, putting on my bowling shoes for another league, stood up and almost fell because the pain appeared again and I couldn't straighen my leg for a few seconds. Yup, swollen knee again. Not sure if it's a sciatic nerve or just typical "overuse" because of all the sliding.
Hobbling all over my house trying to pack because I need to drive up to Vegas for sweepers this weekend and I'm annoyed at myself. I suppose I'll be walking up to the foul line very gingerly and just hope for the best lol.
End of rant
2024.05.17 08:29 BrigitteSophia How and when did you discover you had PCOS?
My periods are very predictable every 27-29 days.
Lately I've been breaking out - cystic acne, chin hairs, thinning hairline
I've done hormonal blood tests and an pelvic exam. Everything is apparently within the normal range.
I do have this fibrocystic in my breasts - sharp breast pains, tender lumps
I feel so unattractive and uncomfortable.
Is there such thing as mild PCOS?
My periods have always been heavy and had no clue that it is unusual to pass large blood clots.
Right before period = strong sugar cravings, binge eating, insomnia or extremely sleepiness
I do not I have a good quality of life right now.
submitted by BrigitteSophia to TwoXChromosomes [link] [comments]
Lately I've been breaking out - cystic acne, chin hairs, thinning hairline
I've done hormonal blood tests and an pelvic exam. Everything is apparently within the normal range.
I do have this fibrocystic in my breasts - sharp breast pains, tender lumps
I feel so unattractive and uncomfortable.
Is there such thing as mild PCOS?
My periods have always been heavy and had no clue that it is unusual to pass large blood clots.
Right before period = strong sugar cravings, binge eating, insomnia or extremely sleepiness
I do not I have a good quality of life right now.