How many hydro 7.5 get you high

Today my (24f) boyfriend (24m) and I were invited out with his family at this fancy bar place (I never drink alcohol, I don’t know the proper term for this place lol). I was really excited because I was actually feeling good today! 90% of the time I wouldn’t be feeling well enough to go with.
We were actually having a really good time, except his grandma was drinking quite a lot. She was talking to my boyfriend about his job and quite aggressively telling him to be grateful for whatever hours he can get, since he was stressed about not being able to work on Memorial Day.
I’m a very quiet person and really don’t talk much, I dont know his grandmother that well so I was just observing and chilling with my mocktail. She suddenly whips her gaze to lock eyes with me and gets her pointer finger out. She exclaims to me “And YOU need to get a job! You can’t rely on him to pay for everything!” (He definitely doesn’t anyway)
This alone made me immediately start to shake uncontrollably. I was shocked and embarrassed. It was like my own brain had been personified, a real person in the real world. And worse, it’s a woman who I really want to like me. I tried to remain cool. I leaned in toward her, locked my hands in front of me, keeping the gaze and said flatly “I have medical issues I am working through. I cannot work right now.”
It was like I had just said “shut up old lady, you’ll never understand how bad I have it!” because she said to me “sure you can work at least part time! I have arthritis and blah blah blah and I own this business and do such and such. You can definitely work!” She kept going on for a long time but I honestly zoned out pretty quickly. I’ve heard this before from women her age, I know the whole speech. I walked out without saying another word. Then I collapsed on the steps in front of the building and cried. That was like my worst case scenario in my head.
My boyfriend let her finish her spiel before also quietly walking out, but when he saw that I was crying he marched back in there and told her how out of line she was. He told her that she doesn’t live with the conditions I do and she will never understand what that’s like.
I love him so much for standing up for me. While most people don’t outright get mean with me, most at least don’t take me seriously at all. But he does, AND he sticks up for me too.
Tbh, I’m only diagnosed with narcolepsy and migraine. But my migraines are almost every day the past few months and most of the time just thinking is like running through knee high mud. Something feels very very wrong. But abuela was basically my own negative self-talk sitting right in front of me, and I don’t think this is going to leave my mind for a long while.
TLDR Boyfriends abuela told me I need to work instead of relying on boyfriend for “everything”. When informed I have medical issues she took it as a challenge telling me if she can work and own a business at her age with all of her conditions then I definitely can too. I walked out and cried. I already hate myself enough for being useless, this was mortifying.

I seriously need to work on my work ethic/self discipline. Backstory of me: I’m a 24f, highly successful for my age job wise (RN), lifelong anxiety problems, and one parent who didn’t discipline at all, and one who went past extreme ways of doing things.
Work has never been very “kind” to me so to say. My first ever job I got 3rd degree burns on my foot- too severe of anxiety to go back to that job. My second job I got fired from because I couldn’t go to a staff meeting because it was my highschool grad day. My third job- I got fired because I “didn’t look happy enough”. I then became a care aid. I loved it so much I became a nurse.
I don’t remember work ethic being a problem until about 18 or 19. I moved out at 18 so I knew I had to work for what I wanted. But my issue is simply put. I don’t want to work. Once that thought is in my mind, I CANT GET RID OF IT. If I do push through and go to work- I’m a literal anxiety zombie mess. I can’t focus, I can’t concentrate, I can’t communicate properly, and something always goes wrong. The last time I did make myself go to work after thinking about how much I don’t want to go for the past however many hours- I made such a medication error it was actually dangerous. Now I know I obviously can’t work when my brain is all combobulated like that.
But now, it’s happening too often. I’m calling in sick too much and even I notice it. The manager hasn’t said anything yet but it’s only a matter of time (knock on wood). The anxiety rabbit hole is exhausting.
Now I know people are gonna go suggesting “change your mindset” but it’s not as simple as that. In order for me to change my mindset on anything I need a good session of EMDR lol (but not funny??).
So tell me. OTHER THAN changing my mindset AND seeing a therapist (I do) how do I force myself to do things I don’t want to?

Hi.
I wanted to share my grandfathers story.
My grandfather suffered a cerebral aneurysm in 1969, he was 52 years old. He was paralyzed on the left side of his body. The Drs told my grandmother that if he would do PT, he could possibly regain usage. My grandfather was so down, he would not do the PT. I think money has something to do with it also.
He was in a wheelchair. He had 7 children and my father was 12 when it happened.
He went on to live another 32 years. I was born 7 years after it happened. By then, he was pretty independent.
I have many memories of and with him. I even stayed alone with him many times, not to care for him though. Actually, he cared for me. Sometimes I'd hand him things but the house was accessible for him. He taught me many things and we'd talk for hours.
I never really thought of him as disabled. Although, there were times when we were in public and people would stare. I was extremely protective of him and I'd get in trouble for saying "what are YOU looking at?"
He thought it was funny. I'd ride on the back of his wheelchair and play in his wheelchair when he was lying down for naps. He was one of the most amazing and courageous men I've ever known.
He stayed by himself while my grandmother worked or ran errands. He was very, very funny and always argued that he could drive again if someone would just help him get in the driver's seat.
I say all of this because I only recently realized how rare it was that someone, especially back then, survived an aneurysm.
I don't know if you've suffered one or know someone that has. I just wanted to say, life is possible. Recovery is possible. Even if you are left disabled, life can still be extraordinary. My grandfather went on to see me born, to see me grow and was there on my wedding day.
I owe who I am to that man. If he had given up, idk where I'd be now.
Don't give up. If my grandpa can do it, so can you. You can still impact the world and even be the reason someone has wonderful memories.
God, I miss that old man.

Not sure exactly what a lot of peoples problems are - but there seems to be an abnormal amount of arrogance and hostility in this subreddit towards seamlessly innocent and sensible questions .
People assume that because they've lived here for X amount of time that gives them permission to troll other peoples posts with negative comments and flat out arrogance.
What I find equally interesting is that when someone comes here to ask for advice ( after already stating they've searched as much as possible for answers) they automatically get downvoted and slaughtered. I think some of you have forgotten what it's like to move to Japan and have NO idea what's going on.
To those trolls a few questions:
1) Did you ever ask for help, at any point for something you didn't understand? 2) Do you think you could change your mind set to helping as opposed to telling people to give up and go home? 3) Why vent your frustrations of life on people who are trying to figure out their steps.
There doesn't seem to be another sub that has such a toxic reputation from the more " veteran" members. It's like living in Japan and maybe speaking Japanese gives people such an ego they think they can just add extra pressure to people already struggling?
I say the following not as a brag but maybe to bring people back to a form of realty. I work in a very high level, prestigious level of work which less than than a few % of people achieve. It's a world wide reputation that most people will never reach - YET in this field of work I have never seen as much arrogance as a few people who have studied Japanese for 10 years ( which is nothing...). In a field of work where questions are ( not matter how stupid they may seem) are valued as a opportunity to come alongside and instruct I'm shocked by the mind set of immigrants on this subreddit.
I'd advice new members to not post on here, there's plenty of other subreddits when the moderates aren't power hungry dictators or the members will rip you apart from asking a seemingly appropriate question.

my apologies i dont even know where to start but this is getting scary! ive had ongoing constipation issues for months now (started in feb from *perscription pain meds bc of a injury followed by very poor advice on how to deal with the constipation from that, basically told me to abuse laxatives and did so for like a month bc they said it was fine!) and, fast forward thru a while of me just doing nothing about it and still not pooping for 5+ days at a time, i did a 7 day cycle of miralax a bit over 2 weeks ago and that seemed to work pretty well, not perfect but whatever, got most of it out. then it immediately went back to me not pooping for about 6 days! so i decided to start taking miralax again about 5 days ago, and holy hell i am so uncomfortable and in pain and its gotten worse day by day. still havent pooped at all (other than basically justenough to leave a mark on toilet paper) but it feels like its building up waste, if you can somewhat understand what i mean? every day i get more bloated and uncomfortable and whereas the first time i got a little bloated after every dose and it went away in the morning, this time it doesnt go down at all and just gets more and more every day, to the point where now i have a limited range of mobility and i can hardly sleep im so uncomfortable and in pain. its so bad that it feels like theres constantly something pushing against my ribs and it is visably pushing them apart (like my ribcage looks wider than it is), i have to constantly have my back as straight as possible otherwise its way worse, but even that hurts too, physically cant bend over, and i find myself unable to sleep because of the immense amount of constant pressure and pain/ache. i genuinely dont know what to do now! the last time i went to the dr because i hadnt pooped in over a week, she wouldnt even listen to me and basically just said it was because im on the skinnier side (i am not underweight...she confirmed that...said she thinks its bc of my weight because i used to be overweight?? idk what she was on about) and just kinda had me sitting there visably upset cause she wont listen to me at all and she was just being a flat out asshole about it, needless to say she gave me zero advice. so im a little hesitant to even go to the doctor about this out of fear im just gonna get ignored again, but i genuinely can't function properly anymore and its only getting worse every day. i dont even know what advice im seeking, but anything helps because im really scared theres seriously something dangerously wrong.

I’m facing a difficult decision and need some advice.
Since last August I have been working as an assistant language teacher (ALT) in Japan. This meant putting my career as a pilot on hold and is only intended as a short interlude in my life before I return to my previous career and doesn’t really benefit me professionally at all. I am really enjoying it; I love living here and my co-workers and my studentas are very kind and we get along really well.
Around January I agreed to stay a second year (starting in August, yes you have to make that decision in January). Since then I realised I would like to live here longer term in the future but that would require me going back to my home country for 4-5 years to gain more experience in my career before I would be eligible to be hired by a Japanese company as a foreigner. My previous career also strongly favours younger people (I am almost 30, and before I came to Japan I just got to the point of being eligible to apply for airline jobs but haven't had an airline job yet and they get harder to get the older you are) and requires you to remain current, so taking a year out is already a difficulty. Two years out especially at my age could significantly impact my future career (and that in turn could impact my ability to get a pilot job in Japan) but it's impossible to say how much of an impact it could have, possibly negligible, possibly a lot. Because of that, after a lot of thinking, I decided after all to only stay for one year. After telling my bosses this they informed me that they wouldn’t be able to get a replacement for me this year (the recruitment cycle has already passed) and so I would be leaving my school, teachers, and students without an ALT. Obviously an ALT is hardly a centrally important person so I’m sure they would manage however I feel absolutely terrible about letting down these people who have been so kind and caring and who I have a responsibility to. I can imagine one of the teachers in particular being very disappointed in me.
I’d absolutely love to stay another year, I’ve thoroughly enjoyed it and despite the fact that I plan to return to Japan longer term there are things about life here in rural Japan as an ALT that I will never get to experience again even if I came back to Japan again as a pilot, so I’m experiencing a real sense of loss. My parents, my father particularly, understands how I feel and acknowledges that I will be letting people down and that’s terrible, but says I need to focus on what’s best for my long term future. I understand that if my long term goal is to work in Japan as a pilot I should make the decision that benefits that and leave, but that feels like a sort of heartless decision.
A third option that would be possible would be to stay an extra seven months or so until the end of the current Japanese school year which might be a good compromise (see out my current students' year and not leave the school quite so high and dry).
If it were just between short term happiness (staying another year) and long term benefit (leaving this year, despite what I would be missing out on and the fact that I really enjoy it here) I think I would reluctantly take the second option (in fact I kind of already did that when I told my boss I’m considering leaving after this year). The added fact that they can’t get a replacement for me at short notice, and so I would be letting down and disappointing people who have been very supportive and who I have a responsibility to, really complicates things at least to me.
Any advice?

Spoilers for the Changelings
It's the year 1023, I just finished the Pax Chrysalia focus tree, and I just ... didn't have enough... It feels like the story just got real and it seems like it just ended abruptly.
Don't get me wrong, I loved the whole thing but just as I was truly into the characters Jachs and Alcippe and where they where going, everything seemingly came to a full stop just as the real war was about to start...
I started this playthrough wanting to conquer the whole world, and humiliating the Pony Princesses. I wanted to enslave the ponies and stop for nothing. But Jachs' story stole the spotlight, and I honestly had a change of heart, I became a bloody pony sympathizer.
When Equestria's compliance became high enough to start with the whole coronation storyline, I did everything I could to change the status quo. I met took that drink from that masked unicorn, I tried keeping the ponies' rights And most importantly I found Twilight in that cave. But, nothing ever came of it.. Seeing how you can promote Jachs and Alccipe to generals I was certain it implied an impending civil war but nope.
Is that truly the end? It feels as though nothing mattered at all.. like calling off the POW parade as per Octavia's request had no meaning at all in the end because of the failed assassination attempt.
Basically, did I fumble something in the story or did it really just end there? Feels like something is missing here. Thanks in advance

I think it's safe to assume that anyone who's been following this show, and, more specifically, following Polin's story since Season 1, is with me in expecting/hoping/praying that Season 3 will end with a pay off of an iconic Polin scene from the Season 1 finale, where Pen tells Colin that when one finds themself to be in love, they should declare it, "assuredly, fervently, loudly."
Full disclosure, if this line doesn't make a comeback by the time the credits roll on Episode 8, I'm legitimately gonna be crushed (it's my biggest wish for the season) -- but fortunately, I'm very confident it will, and, not only that, I think the show's already been planting the seeds for it in moments from the first half of this season.
After endlessly obsessing about the new episodes over the last three days (as one does), it occurred to me that it kinda feels like the writers might be intentionally trying to showcase each part of Pen's Season 1 phrase (assuredly, fervently, loudly) in the speeches/confessions that Colin makes to Pen throughout the season, so that it can then all culminate in one final, massive moment in the finale (i.e., if we get a scene where Colin publicly proclaims his love for Pen to the entire ton, a la the end of their book, regardless of whether he reveals her identity as LW at the same time or not (since I'm forever going back and forth on this particular plot point)).
Let's break it down, shall we?
Assuredly:
Going right to the source, "assuredly" is defined by Oxford Languages as "confidently; used to express the speaker's certainty that something is true."
If we consider Colin's apology to Pen at the end of Episode 1 to be our designated "assuredly" speech, I think it's fair to say this descriptor applies quite well. After the INCREDIBLE way Pen calls him out at the Four Seasons Ball earlier in the episode (one of my all-time favorite Pen moments ever since I first saw the clip on Valentine's Day), Colin seeks Pen out in the garden to reassure her, without a doubt, that he's not embarrassed by her. He proceeds to emphasize just how much he appreciates her and their friendship, and ends the speech by offering lessons to help her find a husband, explaining, "There is nothing more I want than to earn back the favor of the one person who has always truly made me feel...appreciated."
By the end of this speech (one that, as many people pointed out ever since Episode 1 was first screened to fans in Australia several weeks ago, low-key feels like a love confession), Colin has assuredly declared to Pen how much he values and cares for her.
Fervently:
Now, as for the next part of Pen's phrase: "fervently" is defined as "very enthusiastically or passionately."
Using Colin's confession to Pen at the start of the carriage scene in Episode 4 as our designated "fervently" speech, it's once again not difficult to see how this adverb perfectly fits this scene. Colin finally admits his feelings to Pen, and then assuages her doubts by telling her, with even greater emphasis than just a few moments prior, "But I do mean it. It is everything I have wanted to say to you...for weeks."
This confession is also preceded by Colin very enthusiastically chasing after Pen's carriage (kudos, bro), and is followed by him very passionately demonstrating in actions what he's just admitted to her in words.
By the time the carriage pulls up outside Bridgerton House and Colin has punctuated his confession by offering Pen his hand in marriage, there's no denying that he's fervently declared his feelings for her.
Loudly:
Now I know I don't need to define this one, but just for kicks, one of the definitions of "loudly" is "in a strong or emphatic manner" (the other, of course, is "in a way that produces much noise").
This is the part of the trifecta that I don't think we've seen onscreen yet, but I expect it to come soon. More precisely, I anticipate the "loudly" speech to be in a moment Luke Newton teased in an interview that dropped in the week leading up to Part 1's release (I can't for the life of me recall which outlet it was from, otherwise I'd link the interview here), where Colin presumably has it out with Portia for not comprehending why he'd want to marry Pen (as it's already been loving dubbed on Twitter, this is the anticipated "Colin-Portia bitch-off").
The reason I expect this scene to be the "loudly" manifestation of Pen's Season 1 phrase is honestly mostly because there's really no other way to describe what it's like to try and communicate with someone hella overbearing (and at times, obtuse) the way Portia will presumably be in this confrontation with Colin. It feels like a given that Colin will eventually get so frustrated that he'll have an outburst along the same lines as this moment from the book (albeit without the Felicity of it all, since she of course doesn't exist in the show):
"For God's sake," Colin finally exploded, "let Felicity go. I need a private moment with you, anyway."
Silence reigned. It was the first time Colin Bridgerton had ever lost his temper in public.
Regardless of the specifics of this upcoming interaction (which I assume will be happening in Episode 5), it'll be clear to Pen through Colin's words to Portia that he has now loudly declared his love for her, thus completing the trifecta she herself established two seasons prior.
TL;DR: I think the show is representing "assuredly, fervently, loudly" through each of Colin's big speeches this season as a prelude to the final public love declaration he'll make to Pen in the finale.

Students segregate themselves. Am I the only one who noticed that? Am I segregating myself from others?
Especially in the US, I noticed that a lot (not saying all!) Black, White, Asian, students tend to stay with the same race / nationality. I’ve rarely seen mixed friend groups.
As an immigrant who lived in 5 different countries, I don’t label myself…yeah I might have my Eastern European mindset/manners/ because I was born there speaking Russian (native speaker) and was raised by USSR parents, but I’m still far away from being a “stereotypical Eastern European” lol I don’t know if you get it!
M22. I Don’t smoke, I don’t drink, and I don’t go clubbing. Already cuts me off from a lot of college students!
I’ve NEVER had the chance to become friends with White Americans…I don’t know how…you guys (White Americans) have your own social circle and your rich parents paying your college tuition won’t let any outsiders in to your family…it’s the truth. Don’t pretend that foreigners with completely different lifestyle, culture, food, etc. will truly get along with Americans. Which is a pity. Your parents seemed to have accomplished the American dream while we only just got here haha. Every time that I talk to Americans…i feel like I’m being mocked. Military / retired veteran parents made fun of my dad working 2+ jobs, how we never use AC in summer, how we never go out to eat, how we don’t consume all the same media…I don’t know…
I knew many Asians (Vietnamese girls)…I guess the language barrier ruined everything because they seemed like the only motivated, funny, and caring friends. I even invited a girl for a walk which was very cute but she is moving to another state and she was interested in another guy. I’m still genuinely interested in their culture, family and country but…god knows what they are going through with their parents forcing them to study in the US.
My Russian speaking acquaintances don’t hang out with me. They go clubbing, drinking, doing other stupid things… they actually used me for their English homework and I was helping them because I was desperate to make friends (I know it’s dumb lol). I took them out to eat on campus for my OWN money and I even invited them to my house…they never invited me anywhere. Never.
It’s still a weird and hard topic for me…

So my husband (drummer) and I (vocalist) live in a smallish town where there aren't a lot of heavy metal musicians but wanted to start a metal band so we started one a year and a half ago with a guitar player and bass player (best friends) who played thrash. Our ad for band members was clear about us wanting to play symphonic metal and preferably 2 guitar players. At our first meeting and in our first jamming session everything sounded good. The guitar player said he had been playing like 20 years and could play a lot of fast riffs so we hired him. Ever since there's been all this stuff that's come up. For example he said he didn't want to add another guitar player because no one can keep up with him. He talked us into getting a keyboard player instead even though my husband wanted to make the symphonic elements on Reaper and other software. Soon it became evident that there were problems with sing writing. He would only play the same riff repeatedly through a song, and wouldn't tighten it up (he doesn't count or use a metronome or listen to the drums, so the riff can be oddly timed and inconsistent. This was really evident when we tried plugging his riffs into Ableton. Also he doesn't lead into any kind of chorus. He argued that the vocalist is supposed to lead those changes but that doesn't make sense to me and even if I try, he's often kind of lost in his own world. The keyboard player had music theory but quit the band after trying to add structure didn't work.
Meanwhile, the guitar player asked that we play a cover which we were all ok with since we didn't have songs. But then when I suggested a cover he said "I don't want to be a cover band so if you want to play covers you have to do it without me in the band". After that he suggested yet another 2 covers as did the bass player, but the guitar player only wants to play the covers he suggested.
After a year, our keyboard player quit. Then we had a great jam session and came up with 4 or 5 song ideas but they were still basically just a single repeated riff. I went home and came up with lyrics and melodies based on those riffs and all we had to do was structure them out and add the different parts. Even though I printed lyrics, tried adding practice recordings to the drive etc. He would forget any new parts other than his original single riff. My husband tried to get him to adapt open key strumming or just playing chords from the melody I wrote during the choruses or vocals. The bass player even tried to help by listening to what I was singing and showing him the chords. Unfortunately the guitar player won't really take other people's suggestions to help adapt the guitar parts to the melodies in the choruses so he forgets everything and then at practice when we are trying to work those songs he goes into a noodle session or breaks out into an improv riff then races about how we should use that instead. But again... it's only one riff with no added parts, key changes or structure.
All of the time he could be spending helping us write songs or practicing he spends on buying equipment and merchandise and talking to people who can market us, do a big light show and get us gigs. But we have 1 original song!!!!!
Now what's happening is he has a lot of connections in the music industry so he brought this guy over the other day who talked about managing us and doing a demo in a few weeks and us booking gigs. I don't even know if the dude is aware that we only have one song but the drummer and I freaked out because yeah... 1 freaking song. On top of that all the song last I wrote lyrics and full melodies for, he t seems to abandon. There's been times when after a jam session of him playing the same riff for like 5-10 minutes he says we write a song and how awesome it was even though it had no lyrics, no set vocal melody and no distinct verses, choruses or changes. If he does add change to a song it's usually him playing the riff clean then distorted.
My husband and I are at our wits end. We can't add a guitar player, we can't make suggestions because he won't take them, he tosses a song when we try to add structure, and he seems more concerned with making it big than working on the music. I think he literally just wants me to slap any vocals to his riffs, play it for 5-10 minutes and call it a song.
We thought about getting new band members but we don't have a place to play and there just aren't many heavy metal musicians in a driveable distance. Is this even fixable????

So about 2 weeks ago my best friend (22F) from middle school got engaged to her college boyfriend. Which is very exciting and I’m (23F) very happy for her since we’ve known for a while she’d be engaged this spring. I was the first person she called to announce her engagement and we cried / screamed on the phone about it.
Growing up, despite her moving states away, we always stayed in contact / had FaceTime calls. We cried, laughed, and shared everything together. Since about 3 years ago, our phone topics changed to talk more about marriage / engagement. She’s an only child, so she told me for a while (let’s say at least 2 years) that I would be her maid of honor as her best friend of 10+ years. Naturally, as a type A person, I started mentally preparing for the role under this assumption. I only took it seriously when she got engaged where, during finals, I was drafting budget sheets, brand deals, bachelorette party details, etc to make her day perfect because I thought the role was mine.
As you can probably tell, a week later, the day before i graduated which she knew, on a phone call she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Not her maid of honor. She said she picked someone else because they are physically closer to her and they have been more part of her relationship. She also said I was a second choice. She also asked me to help with budgeting because I’m great with spreadsheets. In that time I said yes to being a bridesmaid bc I was in shock but still want to be part of her big day. But I told her no to helping with the budgeting because, from my understanding and research, that is the job of the MOH and I’m not going to do part of the job of a MOH without the title. This was all in one 7 min phone call btw where there wasn’t really any time to process. More happened during the call but that was the meat of it. She just seemed rushed and a bit dismissive of my feelings.
Now, I live in Pittsburgh and she’s in Nashville. This is also our very first experiences with weddings / bridesmaid situations. Logically, her reasonings are somewhat fair in my opinion. I also jumped the gun under the assumption that I would be her MOH and everyone I told said I’m very likely going to be her MOH. So she doesn’t “owe me” anything there bc I did work she didn’t ask for.
Overall, I’m feeling everything under the sun. I feel gutted and I feel like crying every time I think about it. Mostly because I feel betrayed. I feel like I was groomed into a role or that she threw 10 years of friendship down the toilet because I’m not physically there and being told I’m 2nd hurts like hell. I don’t feel like someone who’s 2nd would be the first person she told her engagement to, but here we are. I feel like she rushed the situation (she plans on getting married in the fall of 2025), bc long distance MOH can work, we have FaceTimes, texting, and digital documents. Now that I’m a grad I’ll have more money to visit and spend on her wedding as well. At the very least I feel like she could have had 2 MOH to split the work instead of a false binary as she isnt necessarily the most traditional person. There are ways to make a long distance MOH work. Or that it’s more than just planning, which we both know I’m excellent at, but I can handle her family well since I’ve known them for forever. Which is important bc she has struggled, at times, with her relationship with her mom. Granted ik I can still do that as a bridesmaid. This is a lot of word vomit and idk the point but I’m upset, angry, and confused. Overall just going through the stages of grief. I haven’t talked to her since besides when she congratulated me on graduating, she hasn’t reached out (not that she has too). I don’t want to reach out atm because I don’t want to say anything I will regret if I’m this emotional.
But more or less, with my clouded thinking, I don’t know if I want to be a bridesmaid or attend the wedding. This is dramatic, I know, but I’m really hurt and not thinking straight. Or if I still take on the role of a bridesmaid can I not take the box she wants to send? Bc I feel like I would feel upset and uncomfortable with the box and knowing that I don’t feel as important or important at all as just a bridesmaid. Or being reminded of the rocky state of our friendship (from my pov) and how she sees me as 2nd. The only thing I can think of to do is to have a honest conversation with her of what I’m feeling, but even then what will come out of that? Besides maintaining good communication between us. She can’t go back on her 1st choice MOH, not that I want her too bc if she did I would still feel bad because it isn’t genuine. I’m just sad and at a total loss. I still value our friendship and I still want to be part of her wedding. I just feel like I’ll be resentful of the MOH. Any advice on how to move forward, should I accept the box and deal with it, or anything would be greatly appreciated. I haven’t dealt with something like this before and I feel awful on many aspects. :/
TL;DR- My best friend from 7th grade picked someone else to be their maid of honor because they’re closer physically to her / more involved in the relationship and I’m upset.

we gotta cut this narrative that u need specific starters to make it through classic or that the species of pokemon you have is the biggest factor in winning. if someone needs some ideas on who to run im all for helping but this game has some of the hardest backseating i’ve ever seen. DID YOU KNOW PICKUP IS BROKEN? DID YOU KNOW MEOWTH IS BROKEN? DID YOU KNOW GOLISOPOD IS BROKEN? i mean it’s a game made in a roguelite fashion where ur pokemon are made to get absolutely juiced w perfect ivs, 2 abilities (passive), illegal egg moved,and buffs during the run. everything is going to feel broken when you hit the right combo.
i think people who don’t play roguelikes are unfamiliar with dumping all ur resources into a certain win condtion/combo to become broken and sweep. I think people who dont play rom hacks or hard pokemon are not used to learning the ai’s patterns and starting to easily predict their moves. In either case people struggle and get screamed at that the need better mons or this is what u used in your run so they should do that.. I just swept classic easily with ampharos, nidoqueen, parasect, lurantis, linoone, klefki without one of them having passive, hidden ability, or egg move. i dont think im better than u or some pokemon elitist bc of that. im just trying to say if people need help id like to see more tips on how to play the game and less HOLY FRICKING FRICK U DIDNT EVEN USE TINKATON HAHAHA WHERES UR KYOGRE bc i think it makes it feel like a more insurmountable task to newcomers when u tell them they need to farm passives nd legendaries to get the feeling of one win.
go ahead and tell me what pokemon on my team is super hard to obtain and broken. and before u say it, a lot of easy to get mon like linoone have pickup, i didnt mega my ampharos bc i didnt want dragon weakness, and i saw klefki, mawile, and tinkaton during the run and simply caught the first one i saw so i had an easy defensive pivot. you CAN 1. use lures in biomes w steel/fairy mon to get higher odds to see them 2. find a map 3. always make sure to have balls on hand so u dont miss 4. start with one 5. dna splice one.. its not guaranteed but i’ve heard too many times that it’s super highroll to see one when it just isn’t. (rip to my brothers who got caught in the blue collar loop though (employees at the lake, power plant, or construction site 🤣)
any tips needed id genuinely love to help. this game has really brought back my love of pokemon. best of luck to you for shiny weekend bros!

Hi all! I have the MTHFR A1298C heterozygous mutation. I read that being heterozygous doesn’t necessarily mean you need methylated B vitamins. What are the blood tests you need to get to determine if you need supplements?
Many year ago I was taking a small dose B12 vitamin and my B12 levels ended up really high, like more than double the max level in the range. Last year, I was on a prenatal vitamin that had folate and my folate levels were really high. I’m now wondering if this is related to MTHFR.
Also, I have been taking 5mg of Zyrtec and I recently increased it to 10mg and had a lot of anxiety and intrusive thoughts. It went away when I went back to 5mg. But I’m also wondering if this could be related to MTHFR.
If anyone has any thoughts or advice, I’d really appreciate it!

Today I sat down and sent out letters to the media about how the independent monitor who is overseeing the APD's consent decree has announced that they have met all the requirements, and he is recommending that Albuquerque police be released from further review. A judge will decide if that is the case in early June.
The issue that I have with that??? The Albuquerque Police Department TOPS the nationwide list per capita for officer involved shootings. Population wise they killed more people last year than any other US law enforcement agency, and their rate of shootings has gone UP rather than down over the past decade.
APD is also currently being investigated by the FBI for the DWI scandal, which involves numerous corrupt officers not showing up to court (assumingly in exchange for bribes) over many years... offenses which were not uncovered by the committee put in charge of policing the police, nor the department supervisors.
These things do not suggest that APD is now REFORMED and can be trusted with handling investigations of their own department internally. If anything, it makes it clear that whatever oversight they have been receiving isn't working. Not only do they need the federal oversight to continue, they need someone else put in charge of monitoring their department... obviously anybody who thinks that the APD is currently 'all good' doesn't have very good judgement.
So here is the letter that I have been sending out to local news agencies and government officials. I encourage everyone to research this situation themselves and write their own letters or make phone calls voicing their concerns about the APD being released from federal oversight even though they are literally the countries #1 killer cops and their department is steeped in misconduct.
"I'm writing you today because I simply can not believe that the independent monitor that is overseeing the DOJ order for Federal oversight over APD has recommended that it come to an end because they have supposedly met their goals... The statistics say otherwise.
Albuquerque police top the nationwide list of officer involved shootings per capita - looking solely at population, they killed more people in 2023 than any other US city! Their rate of shootings has gone up over time rather than down, and the increase isn't comparable to a growth in population.
They also have an unreasonably high death rate of incarcerated people, an enormous number of unconvicted people being held for low level offenses while violent repeat offenders are left roaming the streets, and a disproportionate number of arrests of POC that reveal a department wide racial bias.
Albuquerque has an atrocious level of crime for a city this size, and APD has a horrible response time with many people across the city complaining that they NEVER SHOW UP AT ALL to 911 calls for assistance. When they do show up they are incredibly likely to murder people who are unarmed, experiencing a mental health crisis, acting out due to being under the influence of substances, or just because they are Black/Hispanic/Native.
The department has a high number of complaints against officers where nearly none are found in favor of the civilian victims upon internal review - it's an unusually low number in comparison to other places. There are numerous instances over the past decade when they have lacked transparency regarding misconduct, refusing to release the names of officers involved or hold them accountable for their actions. These things alone should be reason enough for them to continue being monitored... proof that they haven't improved enough to be released from review.
But the Albuquerque police are also literally in the middle of a FBI investigation due to the DWI scandal. That's a great big red flag! Why wasn't this independent oversight committee able to spot that multiple officers weren't showing up to court hundreds of times over many years, with all the cases connected to the same attorney? Instead it took a citizen doing their own investigation to break open the corruption, and it required the media covering the story to make sure that this controversy wasn't buried. If the monitors couldn't catch this misconduct and abuse of power, what else is going on in the department that has either not yet been revealed or is being purposely hidden?
None of this sounds like "REFORMED" to me - if this is how the APD behaves while under the microscope, what will they do when they have independent power over their own misconduct again? How can this monitor group see all of this happening yet still recommend that the consent decree end? They are responsible for overseeing a police department that is currently at the TOP of the list for police killings and one that is engulfed in a conspiracy involving many officers, yet they are giving the APD 'the all clear'? Make it make sense!
I'd like to see more news stories pointing out all the reasons why the consent decree shouldn't stop and how they need a new monitor instead - the current one didn't fulfill his promises and hasn't been able to bring the APD into REAL compliance. We citizens obviously cannot bring our complaints directly to the APD or the oversight committee and expect transparency or action, so the burden falls on to the local news agencies to investigate this topic and release their findings to the community.
I've recently seen some news articles that were critical of the head monitor Mr. James Ginger, saying that his office isn't accessible to the public, he's usually out of state, he's been paid many millions of dollars and wasn't able to get the job done in the amount of time that he originally stated.
So it seems suspicious that almost immediately after news agencies investigated his role and uncovered some pretty disparaging stuff about his job performance he suddenly declares the department to be in compliance of the consent decree and announces that his oversight role will end.
Is there a connection? Is he giving them a passing grade after years of putting in the minimum amount of work just so he can write down a win on his resume? Is James Ginger attempting to back out of his responsibility over this police department by painting them as "cured" when they obviously aren't?
Please talk about this issue more, the public really needs to see the facts about APD that suggest that they shouldn't be released from DOJ oversight. It's especially important that some articles about this get published before a judge reviews this claim of the department being in compliance and possibly signs off on it at the beginning of June. We cannot allow the nation's top killer cops, a department chock full of misconduct, to be responsible for policing themselves!
I would love to see the mayor, city council, or some concerned citizens petition the court for a continuation of the consent decree with a new independent monitor in charge, as well as an investigation into the current monitors' performance and reason for declaring the APD in compliance when it's obvious that they have not improved enough to be released from oversight.
But that isn't likely to happen without the media pointing out the facts about APD's performance and reiterating the failures of Mr. Ginger over the past decade. We've got to put some pressure on city officials to do the right thing and stop the APD from being given free reign over their own affairs again... literal lives are at stake."
Thanks for taking the time to read all of that! I really hope that we as a community can prevent this from happening and finally bring some meaningful and much needed change to our police department.

Hello everyone. My boyfriend (M23) and I (F20) have been together for over 2 years. He is my first serious boyfriend, and he treats me so well. He has so many great qualities, and he is my exact type. We moved in together one year ago, and it’s been going well. We live in a very expensive area, which we are able to afford due to his well-paying job. He got me out of a bad situation with my family, where I wasn’t being fed properly and was emotionally abused daily. I have a better relationship with my parents now that I am out of that house, but I still need distance from them. My dad and I used to be extremely close, but now we rarely talk to one another. My mom and I talk weekly, so I’m glad I have that with her. My boyfriend has an amazing family. They are the family that I wish I was a part of while growing up. His parents are so sweet and supportive of us. His mom and I are like best friends, and I love talking to her. His dad is so helpful and always gives me good life advice.
My boyfriend introduced his uncle to me when we were one year into dating. I will call him Ned. I remember the first time I met Ned. I came over to say hello, and we made eye contact, and my heart was racing. I thought he was one of the most handsome men I had ever seen in my life. He and my boyfriend look so much alike. Ned has such a confident and attractive demeanor. He has a high-paying job and loves traveling and doing adventurous things. He has always been friendly to me, greeting me with hugs. He calls me cute and was making lots of eye contact the first time we met. Flash forward to a year later, and my boyfriend and I decided to move in together, and the area we live in is about an hour's drive away from Ned and his family. So when my boyfriend and I drove down with all our belongings in our cars, Ned offered for us to spend the weekend at his house and for me to meet his family. They live in a mansion and are very well off.
Ned has a pretty and cool wife, whom I believe is in her 30s, who is hardworking and has an amazing business. He also has two beautiful children under the age of ten that I adore. I hit it off with his family; they immediately reminded me of the family I want to have one day. The entire weekend, his uncle was making eye contact with me, calling me beautiful and cute. Flash forward to six months later. Ned visits my boyfriend and I at our place, where my boyfriend and I smoke with him and just relax and banter with one another. Ned kept going off about how much my boyfriend’s family loves me and how beautiful I am. Ned also brought up how big his thing is compared to my boyfriend, to which I gasped and looked over at my boyfriend, who was dying of laughter.
Flash forward to six months later. My boyfriend's entire family comes over to Ned’s house to have a boat day. Everyone was there except Ned's wife, and the entire time he was touching me by the shoulder and hand again, giving me alcohol, making lots of eye contact, and I even caught him looking at me, to which he looked away. He always comes up to me to start a conversation and get to know me better. He hands me glasses filled to the brim with wine and touches my hand so caressingly. I don’t think much of it, and while this happens, The morning of the boat ride, we get on the boat, and Ned introduces me to friends of his and once again gives me alcohol. My boyfriend is very close with his uncle, and they get along so well. Ned made a joke about how many fingers it takes to get inside a woman, to which my boyfriend just laughed.
I’m playing with his kids the entire time, and Ned comments that I would be an amazing mom and that I am so good with them. He took lots of pictures of me and the kids, as well as pictures of me when I wasn't looking. We get back to the house to eat, and I catch him constantly staring at me once again. My boyfriend and I then leave. A week later, Ned texted my boyfriend to go have sex with me so that he could use our streaming service to watch a game since we were using it, and this caught me by surprise. We went to visit Ned and his family a week later to watch a game, and Ned’s wife was there. Whenever she is around, Ned is not flirtatious with me at all and tries to cut conversations short. He still makes lots of eye contact with me, asks for my age, and gives me plenty of alcohol.
I think Ned’s wife notices him staring at me and laughing with me, to which she gives me dirty looks and makes rude remarks. I made an inside joke with my boyfriend, asking if he recognized some songs that were playing "in the streets," to which Ned's wife replied, saying I was trying to act "ghetto" and giving me dirty looks, which made me pause and go silent the rest of the night. We finally leave, and my boyfriend tells me that Ned was married three times and that his wife is not affectionate towards him and the kids that much, and she can’t relax. Ever since then, I can’t stop thinking about Ned. He is on my mind 24/7. He is twice my age, and I dream about him constantly and have sexual thoughts about him. I would never hurt my boyfriend and his family, whom I adore. But I can’t get Ned out of my head. What do I do?
TL;DR: I love my boyfriend, but I cannot stop thinking about his uncle, and I have a massive crush on him. What do I do?

Students segregate themselves. Am I the only one who noticed that? Am I segregating myself from others?
Especially in the US, I noticed that a lot (not saying all!) Black, White, Asian, students tend to stay with the same race / nationality. I’ve rarely seen mixed friend groups. I feel very lonely in college.
As an immigrant who lived in 5 different countries, I don’t label myself…yeah I might have my Eastern European mindset/manners/ because I was born there speaking Russian (native speaker) and was raised by USSR parents, but I’m still far away from being a “stereotypical Eastern European” lol I don’t know if you get it!
M22. I Don’t smoke, I don’t drink, and I don’t go clubbing. Already cuts me off from a lot of college students!
I’ve NEVER had the chance to become friends with White Americans…I don’t know how…you guys (White Americans) have your own social circle and your rich parents paying your college tuition won’t let any outsiders in to your family…it’s the truth. Don’t pretend that foreigners with completely different lifestyle, culture, food, etc. will truly get along with Americans. Which is a pity. Your parents seemed to have accomplished the American dream while we only just got here haha. Every time that I talk to Americans…i feel like I’m being mocked. Military / retired veteran parents made fun of my dad working 2+ jobs, how we never use AC in summer, how we never go out to eat, how we don’t consume all the same media…I don’t know…
I knew many Asians (Vietnamese girls)…I guess the language barrier ruined everything because they seemed like the only motivated, funny, and caring friends. I even invited a girl for a date (at least I thought it was a date) but she is moving to another state and she was interested in another guy. I’m still genuinely interested in their culture, family and country but…god knows what they are going through with their parents forcing them to study in the US.
My Russian speaking acquaintances don’t hang out with me. They go clubbing, drinking, doing other stupid things… they actually used me for their English homework and I was helping them because I was desperate to make friends (I know it’s dumb lol). I took them out to eat on campus for my OWN money and I even invited them to my house…they never invited me anywhere. Never.
It’s still a weird and hard topic for me…

For starters I been to a concert before, but never have been to a kpop concert. The group I will be going to is itzy and I am going to their 2nd world tour (Born to be) . I have some questions and any tips are greatly appreciated!

1. How early should I go? The show starts at 8 so im not sure how early i should go. The venue itself is kinda small for a big artist like itzy (JYP did my girls dirty) I dont have vip if anyones asking.
   
2. Should I purchase a itzy lightring? I am just wondering so I can buy it before hand or even at the merch shop there. I heard some people say that lightsticks r more cheaper at the venue then at other places, so im not sure. I know the place near me that sells lightsticks, but the itzy lightring 90 dollars plus tax, which is expensive. I was just wondering how much they usually are, and if i should buy a lightring. Many of my friends said to buy so it can bring back memories and if i dont like it or stop liking it by kpop (which will probably wont happen) i can just sell it. If I should get it, does anyone recommend any North American based shops that do shipping for affordable lightsticks?
   
3. Do I need to know ALL of itzys songs and memerzie their fan chants? I love itzy and their one of my favourite kpop groups, but since I stan a lot of girl groups I dont know all of Itzys songs. So Im just wondering if I should listen to them before the show, for fanchants Im just curious if you need to know all of them.
   

This is all the questions I had so I hope anyone can help me with these! Thank you!

I came back home from college and texted her immediately because we always used to hang out whenever I got back. This time her phone was disconnected. I checked Instagram and found that I wasn’t on her private page anymore, but I assumed it was just a glitch. I was still worried though because I had no way to reach her, and I only grew more worried for her safety over the next three days until she finally answered to the iMessage to her email.
She’d changed her number because someone was spamming her with strange texts. I was confused as to why she hadn’t let me know because I thought that we were close friends. She said that she felt a shift in my energy from our last conversation.
I dismissed it as just something weird and tried to schedule our next hang out as usual, but throughout the conversation she kept giving me excuses and she sounded different than usual. Finally she told me that she’d gotten into a relationship and was trying to be respectful of her boundaries.
That’s where I went from distraught to pretty upset. I’ve never hit on her or anything; I genuinely considered her a sister to me and someone I could trust with anything. Only to find out that all it took was a relationship she’d gotten into in the last two months for her to drop me. It also clicked to me that she’d actively removed me from her Instagram page
I guess I just don’t get it. Does a relationship mean that you can’t have friends anymore? When I told her about my confusion and how I had been excited to tell her about my semester, she said that “when we were younger, going out and having personal, deep conversations with a friend while in a relationship was okay, but it’s different now that we’re old.” We’re 21. We’re not old, and why should getting older mean you can’t have deep conversations with your friends?
I’ve resigned myself not to argue with her because I don’t think I could do it without sounding angry. Maybe that’s dramatic but it feels like I’ve lost a close friend, and it feels like she didn’t trust me enough as a friend to give me her new number, and all the time we spent together and the conversations we had and things we went through were all for nothing, and it hurts.
This all happened early this week but it’s fresh today because something happened that I would have told her about. She and I almost lived the same life, separately. That’s to say that I’ve lived a relatively unique set of circumstances in my life, and I was lucky to find someone who had gone through many of the exact same things, someone who could relate. Now I’ve lost that too.
There are so many more questions I have, but for now I’m just trying to get over it

Here's the stuff you'd want to know about me before chatting.
I'm child free because I refuse to put another human into this increasingly dark world. I don't want them to have my anxiety or Asperger's. I have an existentialist belief system. So I decided that I want to spend the rest of my life focusing on myself and hopefully my future partner - whoever that may be.
RECENT PIC
Yes. Me bald. You can rub my head for good luck. If the cure for baldness is ever discovered, I will hop right on that. I'm 6' tall for you height enthusiasts.
Personality-wise I am pretty boring in all honesty. Being someone who has ADHD, anxiety, and high functioning ASD, you can bet I am not a normal person. On top of that, having spent a freakish amount of time on the uncensored internet through my childhood desensitizing my mind, I'm fairly dead inside. If you can relate or sympathize, that is awesome.
I'm looking for a long term relationship. The kind where we eventually live together on dual income, have date night like every night, and just enjoy each other's love for as long as possible. I am VERY romantic and sappy when I start developing feelings. My love languages are physical touch and quality time spent together.
Hobbies include worrying about my future, browsing reddit, having a nearly empty fridge with a 1 year old jar of kimchi in it because it seemed healthy to buy at the time, and uh what else..? Music, Anime, Gaming (I was the highest ranks in CSGO AND RL so don't hate the hours yo), Coding, Lockpicking, Antique Restoration, and talking some shmack with the BOYS.
I appreciate many types of humor. Dark, cringe, observational, and surreal are my favs. I'm not easy to offend. And if you want, you can roast me in your opening message.
I like getting out too but I hate doing that alone. That's what you're for. Duh. 😙
I am open to a temporary LDR if your communication game is on point. I will be up front though. When I'm at work it is difficult to text very much because I work in a lead position and am extremely busy except when I'm taking a break. I also work in a highly USDA regulated environment and every time I touch my phone I need to sanitize or change my gloves before I touch anything else. I would make an effort to talk though. I work about 45 hours though so I have plenty of free time after work to spend actual quality time together.
Some things that are definitely important to me:

• Physical attraction. I'm gonna want to see a picture of you sooner rather than later pretty please. 🤗
• Politically liberal. We probably won't get along otherwise 😂.
• Monogamous. You can still call other guys hot on TV though.
• A sex drive. I'm not looking for someone asexual is all I'm saying.

Please message me only if you are truly interested and willing to date (or hop on a voice or video call if long distance). And don't get me wrong; I am not here to try and force a relationship faster than it needs to. In fact I'm in no rush at all. I just strongly believe that texting alone is not enough to develop into something meaningful.

Here's the stuff you'd want to know about me before chatting.
I'm child free because I refuse to put another human into this increasingly dark world. I don't want them to have my anxiety or Asperger's. I have an existentialist belief system. So I decided that I want to spend the rest of my life focusing on myself and hopefully my future partner - whoever that may be.
RECENT PIC
Yes. Me bald. You can rub my head for good luck. If the cure for baldness is ever discovered, I will hop right on that. I'm 6' tall for you height enthusiasts.
Personality-wise I am pretty boring in all honesty. Being someone who has ADHD, anxiety, and high functioning ASD, you can bet I am not a normal person. On top of that, having spent a freakish amount of time on the uncensored internet through my childhood desensitizing my mind, I'm fairly dead inside. If you can relate or sympathize, that is awesome.
I'm looking for a long term relationship. The kind where we eventually live together on dual income, have date night like every night, and just enjoy each other's love for as long as possible. I am VERY romantic and sappy when I start developing feelings. My love languages are physical touch and quality time spent together.
Hobbies include worrying about my future, browsing reddit, having a nearly empty fridge with a 1 year old jar of kimchi in it because it seemed healthy to buy at the time, and uh what else..? Music, Anime, Gaming (I was the highest ranks in CSGO AND RL so don't hate the hours yo), Coding, Lockpicking, Antique Restoration, and talking some shmack with the BOYS.
I appreciate many types of humor. Dark, cringe, observational, and surreal are my favs. I'm not easy to offend. And if you want, you can roast me in your opening message.
I like getting out too but I hate doing that alone. That's what you're for. Duh. 😙
I am open to a temporary LDR if your communication game is on point. I will be up front though. When I'm at work it is difficult to text very much because I work in a lead position and am extremely busy except when I'm taking a break. I also work in a highly USDA regulated environment and every time I touch my phone I need to sanitize or change my gloves before I touch anything else. I would make an effort to talk though. I work about 45 hours though so I have plenty of free time after work to spend actual quality time together.
Some things that are definitely important to me:

• Physical attraction. I'm gonna want to see a picture of you sooner rather than later pretty please. 🤗
• Politically liberal. We probably won't get along otherwise 😂.
• Monogamous. You can still call other guys hot on TV though.
• A sex drive. I'm not looking for someone asexual is all I'm saying.

Please message me only if you are truly interested and willing to date (or hop on a voice or video call if long distance). And don't get me wrong; I am not here to try and force a relationship faster than it needs to. In fact I'm in no rush at all. I just strongly believe that texting alone is not enough to develop into something meaningful.