He will never understand. Cause you can't understand those unless you been through it yourself and can relate, right? What are my chamces this relationship could work. Right now I feel it is impossible. I gave it my best shot. I loved him not for his love but to love him. I did so much to be there for him. After so much torture, I have come to realize he is spoilt brat who never understood the value and bravery behind my love. He has no idea of the realities of the world. It would be nice if I could find someone who I could relate with. Who loves to grow as much as I do from the pain. A person that isn't afraid to learn from failure. People from healthy backgrounds don't know just how valuable you are, as someone who had to figure out self love and everything. They had it easy. It feels like They take everything for granted! Please help me see the light ya'll. Am I right to think this way. I have lost all hope in my current relationship. I think I should dump him now.

ALL CHARACTERS ARE 18+
"Healing comes in waves, and I'm allowed to feel every rise and fall of my tide." -Alex Elle
'After a long and stressful day, I yearn to be held. To be cherished. To be lovingly tucked into bed by someone nearly old enough to be my mother. Well, maybe not THAT far but enough of an age difference to give us a certain motherly dynamic.
You've always been there for me. I love the way you smell as you hold me close in bed at the end of every night. I love the way your silky, sexy robes hug your curves as you climb into bed.'
Hi! I have an idea for a gentle, wholesome, cuddly, DETAILED RP between a younger man and a much older woman. Something about an older woman taking control without being too cold or mean about it just sends shivers down my spine in the best way possible.
I'd love for this to mainly be a slice of life kinda deal, heart to heart talks, all that stuff. Maybe we could include snippets of their day-to-day lives in it i.e. doctor's appointments, therapy appointments (for him), clothes shopping, etc.
I'd put his age around 19/20/21. She's MUCH older. We can go over her exact age in chat. But the age gap is a VERY essential detail in regards to their dynamic, how she treats him, and how she approaches him. I also have backstories in mind for both of our characters. I will have to warn you, his backstory is quite dark. If that's an issue for you then I'll try to be as flexible as I can but I feel like it's essential for his character.
I would love to discuss the details further in detail with all you fine people ❤️.

Hey everyone,
So I will be back at Cedar Point for 3 days, from today to Tuesday. I went in 2019 for the first time and spent a few days on that visit as well(I live in Texas so it's definitely a challenge to make a trip out here). A major reason for my motivation to go back is that I only got 3 rides on Steve TOTAL over the course of a few days to horrendous 2+ hour lines each time. It's my #1, I love it to death, and I absolutely want to get a lot more rides on it this trip. It's my first time going back to Cedar Point since then and I am PUMPED!
There is just one major issue. The RMC restraints are VERY painful for me. I am a 5' 8'' 205 lb guy, and the lapbars are very painful on my thighs on those ejector moments. I don't have any issue with the shin guards(like some people complain about), but it's the lapbar that absolutely hinders the ride experience. I do not have issues with thigh discomfort with any other restraints. The Texas RMC hybrids are no issue since they use Gerstlauer, Maverick is no issue, the new Intamin restraints aren't any problem either. No other restraints are an issue for me, it's the RMC trains specifically.
I have no idea why the RMC trains are this problematic for me. It looks like your typical lapbar like any other, but yet it causes me so much issues for some reason.. No one seems to have any problem with them except for the shin guards, but those aren't a problem for me as I mentioned. It's frustrating, because the ride is still absolutely incredible and is absolutely my #1 despite the pain, but if I can find a decent workaround, it will blow me away even more than it already has.
I already have found somewhat of a workaround. I went to Magic Mountain for the first time this past September, and rode Twisted Colossus 10 times over the course of a few days. It was the second RMC I did that uses those awful restraints, so of course, I had the same thigh pain issue that I did with Steel Vengeance. But on my 7th ride or so, I tried something: I put the seatbelt across my thigh and really tightened it. This helped GREATLY, as the pain was drastically reduced due to basically flying into the seatbelt rather than the lapbar. This did affect the airtime a little bit, but nothing too major. Definitely prefer this over riding in pain.
Since I will be back on SV over the next few days, it will be my first time trying this out on the ride since I discovered this trick over the past year when I rode TC. However, is there any way to make the belt looser so it's not as tight but your thighs still don't slam into the lapbar(with the seatbelt still really softening the blow), and how do you know how tight to make it to find that sweet spot? If this is not a good idea, what else can I do that would help?
Sorry for the wall of text, but thanks for reading and appreciate the help!

I've been lurking around here for a while with different accounts, thanks all for your support, I've been trying to "help" people on this subreddit for a while with different throwaway accounts but who am I fooling? I don't think it's a good idea to try to "help" other people when I cannot even help myself.
To my relatives reading this I want you to know that the reasons I'm doing this have nothing to do with any of you or anyone in particular, I am very greatful for all the support I've received over the years, I'm just tired of existing, I'm tired of living, no matter what I do ever since the day I was born there's always some shit going on, whenever I think I'm going to have peace a new random shit happens, it's been like this ever since the day I was born and I've come to realize that it'll stay like this forever until I finally pass away in PEACE.
I've already been living for more than 30 years, it's enough, I'm tired I'm just done, I did everything I wanted, I have no regrets(not even the bad decisions), I apologize deeply for any pain/suffering or unexpected consequences my absence might cause but I do not wish to participate in this "thing" anymore. Thanks to all my family for all the support, isn't it funny that after fight so hard to stay alive now I will end it? lol
There is not amount of money, success, companionship or advice that can save me from the pain of existing, there is nowhere to run, there is not a brighter future and things will NOT get better ever, the only way things will get better is when it finally ends, thank you all

10 Warning Signs of Cult Recruitment

Research shows that anyone is susceptible to joining a cult. “Not me!” you say. Yes, you. The self-serving bias that makes people think they’re the exception to the rule can make them feel invulnerable—and leave them unprotected from pathological salespeople. You don’t have to be particularly gullible, insecure, or emotionally needy to be successfully recruited. Cults exploit psychological elements that are hardwired in pretty much everyone. Here’s how they do it:

1. Social isolation. If you are seeing less and less of your family and peers in favor of your new best friends, ask yourself why. Cults gradually chip away at your community until only cult members remain. If the cult is your entire world—a closed system—then leaving it can feel really scary.
2. Cyber isolation. If all your Facebook friends agree with you, ask yourself why. Cyber isolation can lead to confirmation bias. That means you only see information that supports what you already believe. And your beliefs are also continually validated in the echo chamber of cyber isolation. The Facebook algorithm shows you things you want to see in a never-ending cycle of digital influence.
3. Promised rewards. If you find that you’re on the verge of amazing accomplishments or the fulfillment of your wildest dreams, ask yourself why. Cults promise gifts like a spiritual Wheel of Fortune: enlightenment, self-actualization, love, unlicensed psychotherapy, companionship, exorcism, peace of mind, perfect health, eternal life, great sex, a forever home, a loving family. Over-the-top rewards are part of the conversion process. How can anyone say no?
4. Phobia indoctrination. If you find that you have a lot of new fears, ask yourself why. Seeing threats everywhere? Cults use fear to induce people to stay within their ranks, where they’ll be safe. And naturally the only person who can truly protect you is the cult leader. Who is also responsible for punishing you. Their methods are effective because they alternate fear with love, leading to disorganized attachment.
5. Heightened emotion. If you find yourself feeling extremely happy, angry, or scared, ask yourself why. Cults trigger big emotional responses and then direct that emotion toward a strategic target when you’re at your least rational.
6. Love-bombing. If you find yourself feeling more loved than you ever have in your life, ask yourself why. This is a tactic that narcissistic manipulators use in interpersonal relationships, but it also applies to cultic attempts at thought reform. Cult members will spoil you with attention and affection in order to make you feel connected and important. And people keep coming back for the love drug.
7. Us vs. them mentality. If you find that you have a lot of enemies all of a sudden, ask yourself why. Cults invent enemies to help solidify the group identity. When you envision yourself as a missionary for good versus evil, there might be too much at stake for you to abandon your cause.
8. Social influence. If you find that everyone around you agrees on something, ask yourself why. Psychological studies show that compliance goes up with the number of people involved. Most people won’t reject an idea if the whole group supports it. And cult prospects are typically overwhelmed with group-ecstatic activities, which can lead them to poor information processing. Essentially, peer pressure makes it impossible for people to function at full capacity.
9. Intelligence-dampening. If you find yourself too tired or confused to make decisions, ask yourself why. Cults use techniques like sleep-deprivation, alternate states of consciousness, repetition, and thought-stopping to overwhelm someone’s cognitive resources and critical thinking skills. They destabilize your view of reality. And when your mind is under threat, you keep returning to the safety and love of your leader. It doesn’t mean you’re stupid, even if you develop false beliefs. All humans have false beliefs and a tendency toward magical thinking. But cult members depend on the cult for direction when their brains are disoriented.
10. Identity disturbance. If you feel like a new you–a better you–ask yourself why. Cults alternate reward and punishment to stress people out and disrupt their identities. From there, cults can inflict a new identity on a member, one that depends on submission and self-surrender. And it doesn’t help that other sources of identity, like work and school, are slowly taken over by cult participation.

source: https://thriveworks.com/blog/protect-yourself-from-mind-control-techniques

I really enjoyed the series, but I didn’t read them until I was 22. I tried to read the first one in 6th grade, but I only got like 3 chapters in bc it was way too grim, sad, scary, horrifying to me. There’s no way I could have handled all that violence, devastation and grief as a teen. I think it’s somewhat disturbing that we all like dystopian fiction so much in the first place, but every time I try to bring this up to people, they say that the whole point of the Hunger Games series is to hold up a mirror to how horrifying things can get when governments are corrupt, etc etc. I totally get that, and Collins does a remarkable job doing that. HERES MY QUESTION THOUGH. Why would she choose to create this series with all that intense messaging for TEENS? How are they supposed to grapple with all the death and sacrifice and war and mass destruction? Do you think she did it bc she had a good idea and happened to be a YA author? Or did she come up with the idea and really think it was best fit for a teen audience? Or did it have to be YA bc the characters are teens?

I’m a long-time player and GM. I haven’t MotW but I have played many similar games.
So I have this great group of friends, incredibly fun and playful people generally. But the group ethos has zero nerd energy in it
We are going on a trip together as a huge group (20 people), including several I don’t know. I pitched the idea of a game one of the nights (for up to 5 players), and some of them are quite interested!
Ok so I have a table of all new players, some might struggle taking themselves seriously when they play. Horror (fear specifically) is immersive and accesible though. MotW seems perfect. Any tips to make this successful? Is this a terrible idea?
If you were to limit playbooks which ones would you choose?
I’m thinking of running Big Haunt on Campus. It seems solid and a little scary. Good idea?
How might I set expectations for them for their RPG experience?

"la mano" or "mo amen" is a gesture and sign to honor and respect your elders when greeting them but as a socially inept person, I struggled it with its unwritten rules.
There were so many awkward moments when our relatives come over then I get near for la mano and I get ignored and I stand there awkwardly. AND THEN they comment about me for being disrespectful for not doing la mano, when they just freaking ignored me.
then there's meeting older people when I'm vacationing on my relative's place. idk if I should also la mano too if my cousin la manos every old person even I have no idea who they are. I'm just grateful with my cousin during these situations so that I could follow the lead.
I respect my elders and all, but I dread on thinking how to la mano every family gathering. I get so anxious when the relatives arrive and wait at the front gate so that I could get over with la mano so early when they arrive.
And when they leave I have to la mano too??! I just learned it yesterday and I don't do la mano when they leave . On their minds I guess I'm seen as disrespectful or something.
So do you'll have anxieties dealing with this formality/gesture ?

Growing up, I developed a crush on anyone who was nice to me; I had a crush on ALL my friends; and I feel this towards ALL genders. All I know is that I consider both men and women attractive, but I don’t necessarily care about their gender identity when it comes to finding them attractive or not. I honestly can't understand how someone wants to do romantic or sexual things with another person. The reason I think I have a gender preference is because my entire life I have only been introduced to boys and girls, and the only queer people that I see are online, and all of them are attractive regardless of their gender, but again, that’s only online. How do I know if I actually feel that in the real world? How do I know if this is even a romantic attraction or just an aesthetic attraction? DannyPhantomexe and _augustskyz_ (both on YouTube) are both hot as heck, and just seeing them on my For You page gets me giddy. I was brought up in an ultra-conservative Christian family and community, so I’ve only ever been introduced to gender men and women, so I’ve only ever been attracted to men and women, but when I am online, I find everybody attractive, regardless of what their gender is. If they have an objectively pretty appearance, then I think they are pretty. Growing up, obviously, I was attracted to men, because that’s all I ever grew up thinking was OK, but I just remember seeing girls on TV and thinking that they were so pretty, wanting to hold hands with them, and wanting to snuggle and cuddle with them. I like all genders, or at least I think I do, and my "preference" changes randomly without direction. It really depends on the situation and the person. Any ideas as to what this would be?
— Rowan (they/he)

This is my first script. Please be kind. If it sucks, it sucks, but I had fun writing it nonetheless. Please link me if you use/fill it. I would love to hear your take on it. Free to monetize, Youtube, Patreon, whatever, I just want to hear it. :)
P.S. I know people hate seeing other characters lines a lot -- so I just covered them for other people and if you want to see them, just click on them -- there just little responses that helped me continue writing the script.
Speaker: You are Killian James a.k.a. Hook. Your eyes are the color of the sea, your hair is dark as night, and you are dashing, troubled, and flirtatious. The lilt of an accent gives you a melodic tone, and your personality is dark, playful, and direct. You are comfortable in three-piece suits, and are a dangerous man with many secrets.
Listener: Your name is Wendy. Your friends have convinced you to go to a bar downtown in the more dangerous part of the city due to rumors, only they end up bailing without you. You are going to go home after you finish your drink. The bar is called Never Land, Where, according to your friends rumors, the owner is a mysterious man that they all seem fascinated with. Apparently, he is tall, dark, and handsome – a devil of a man that goes by a strange name. They call him… Hook.

Scene setter: Italics
SpeakeVA: Plain text with "quotes" outside of the sentence/phrases
Internal monologue: Bold/italics
Action of character or SFX: ((Double Parenthesis))
Response from a character: ((pause))

((SFX – The club is above this basement 'torture chamber' area-you can hear the music of the club playing muffled. The basement area is clean and not dungeon-y but is more of a modern torture chamber with drains for easy ah… clean up))
SCENE: There is a man chained/tied up. Hook enters the room, looking almost bored that he needs to be there. He takes off his jacket, handing it to one of his henchmen, leaving the vest on, before he unbuttons his cuffs and starts rolling the sleeves up.
“I’m not pleased that our shipment is late, Mr. Jukes. It was supposed to arrive on a super yacht named the ‘Jolly Roger’ today with a bunch of rich snobs who were none the wiser. Your men guaranteed me that it would arrive with the staff and be loaded off on the dock shortly after, however, that is yet to come to fruition, and I am not a patient man.”

--

((SFX: VA puts on leather gloves, stretches fingers and gets comfortable in them))
“I am aware that they have taken a detour due to a storm, Jukes – but your mismanagement of my time, and my money, are not to be forgotten. Bad form, Jukes! Bad form!”

((SFX: dragging knife sound – //our character uses a tactical Hook knife. It’s typically for gutting deer – not really necessary to know, it’s just to flesh out the character for you//, Hook approaches slowly))
--
“I know it won't happen again. Don’t worry, Jukes, since this is your first time having erred with me, I shall simply leave you with a small reminder. I expect the shipment to be directed to our port swiftly, otherwise,” ((small cruel laugh)) “I won’t be nearly as lenient again.”

((SFX chains straining, screaming that becomes muffled screaming, as Hook takes his knife and leaves the man with a Cheshire Grin/Glasglow Smile up one side of his face, heavy breathing for a moment, as he returns and throws his knife down on the table)) --
“Get me my other three-piece suit from my office and a clean shirt. I’ve got this bastard’s blood all over me. He's not to be given his freedom until I hear that the shipment has come in from the Jolly Roger. If it does not go to plan – we will have to take further, more drastic actions and I don’t want to have to find this cad, Mr. Jukes again. Do I make myself clear?”
((henchmen answer))
“Good.”
((SFX – him pulling off the leather gloves and getting changed))
“One of you stay here and watch him. Tonight I’ll be on the club floor. I’m not to be interrupted until The Crocodile has made contact. Is that understood?”
((pause))
“Good. That is all.”
((he leaves))

((SFX – transition to this however you like))
\*modern day, bar scene/sounds (*no* jazz or classical music - it's a nightclub), people mingling in the background. In enters our VA/Hook.*

“Tinkerbell, pour me my usual, will you, dear?”
((Tink is quick, and slides him his drink. Sip, sigh, and pause as he looks around)) (( This internal thought is not necessary but if you want to, go for it ))
\*internal thought*\** Who’s this? Oh my, sweet lamb, you are definitely in the wrong place.
“Tink, one last thing, could you possibly tell me anything about that young woman there? The one in blue.”
((listening intently for a moment))
“Hm. Lovely. Thank you, dear.”
((SFX – he puts down his drink, footsteps/fine Italian leather shoes approaching the young lady who is at the bar))
“Well, well, well… Isn’t that a beautiful dress on an even more beautiful woman. That color of blue really suits you. You… are a piece of art. A fascinating and intriguing piece of art. However, you don’t quite seem like you belong here.”
((pause))
“Someone as divine as you, as *innocent* as you, dressed as you are, doesn’t really seem to fit in. Not in this kind of place. You look more like you would fit in one of the high-class jazz lounges uptown. Martinis, a piano player, velvet couches and the like. Do you think that you fit in amongst these gentlemen of fortune and these women dressed in their slinky club clothes? Look around, do you see the patrons here?”
((short pause as she looks around))
“Don’t you see? You are simply dressed too elegantly for a place like this. No, you, my dear, are definitely not the type that belongs amongst these fiends. You belong uptown. Not here, amongst the dregs of society like us. Your mannerisms are too graceful, you walk with pride and your chin up – this is not the body language of one of my people.”
((pause))
“Well, I happen to own this establishment, Never Land, so I am rather familiar with the likes of the people who tend to come through its doors, and I have never seen you before. You seem quite unforgettable. Could I have the pleasure of having your name?”
((pause))
“Wendy… What a lovely name for such a lovely woman. Well, Wendy, darling – my name is Killian. My friends call me Hook.”
((pause))
“So many questions! What an inquisitive slip of a thing you are. Perhaps, we could talk over a drink?”
((*VA snaps fingers* Bartender Tinkerbell approaches immediately and waits)) ((ListeneWendy begins to decline))
“Don’t fret, darling. It’s just a drink. Should you find yourself not interested in our conversation or in me, you are more than welcome to leave and go back uptown to the *safe* areas of the city, where the likes of people like me and my ilk will be of no bother to you ever again. But should I pique your interest, perhaps allow me the grace of your presence again in the future.”
((pause))
“Just one drink. And nothing more.”
((ListeneWendy accepts))
“Delightful! Tink, if you could get us another round. One of whatever the lady was drinking, and my usual.”
((short pause as he takes her in before sighing and leaning in closer to speak to her))
“Darling, do tell me, why have you wandered into the seedy underbelly of our city? What is it exactly that you are searching for? Mystery? Intrigue?"
((whispers // into her ear))
"...*Danger*?”
((VA leans back and there is a sly curling of his lips into a crooked smile))
“Mm, that blush really does make me think that you truly are as innocent as I originally thought, Darling. Albeit, I am sure you knew what kind of danger you could get into coming to a place like this. You may be looking for danger, but it seems danger has found you instead.”
((pause))
“Oh, yes, danger. There is plenty of danger here. However, it seems like that’s something you seem to be searching for. Should I inquire as to –“
((VA leans in once more))
“What *kind* of danger you are looking for? See, Darling, that’s the thing about danger… You may only want a little but you never truly know how much you’re going to get.”
((pause))
((VA - practically whispered across her lips or ear, you imagine how close you want to get))
“Ah, yes, Wendy, darling. I happen to be very… Very… Dangerous.”
((Listener steps back))
((he gives a low chuckle))
“Do I … make you … Nervous?”
((short pause and VA steps forward as Listener shakes her head defiantly))
“Or perhaps, I am not the kind of danger you are looking for?”
((closer))
“Do you even *know* what you are looking for, my little lamb?”
((dangerously close to her))
((pause))
((drinks come at this time delivered by Tink – VA returns to less invasive persona))
"Ah, thank you, Tink. You’ve impeccable timing. Shall we? I’d love to take this to a VIP booth I prefer to sit in. It will give us a little more privacy and won’t be as loud. Come now, pet."
((footsteps/music/whatever SFX have them move to a slightly quieter place, sit in a booth))
"Do you mind, Darling? I’d much rather be sitting next to you than across the table. That way I can hear you better. Yes, that’s it, just move in a little further."
((this gives no escape for Listener as James/Hook is between the easy exit and her – SFX of her moving over if you want to get technical and him sitting next to her))
((pause))
“Ah, *that*. The name Hook… It is simply from a childhood long ago. Raised in an orphanage with many other lost boys like myself. It’s a truly heartbreaking story, I’m sure, but I’d like you to remember our first meeting in a different light. Not melancholy and deep, dark secrets. Not yet, anyway. Perhaps, if you decide to embark on a journey with me in the future, or are willing to grace me with your presence again, we can discuss it then.”
((Listener nods, nervously))
((he leans in))
“But you, Wendy, darling –“
((whispered // reaches out to draw a finger down her jawline as he looks from her eyes to her mouth))
“You still haven’t answered me.”
((pause))
“About what *kind* of danger you are looking for…”
((pause // leaning in))
“Are you looking for something – just a wee bit threatening? Perhaps something that will get the heart pumping momentarily?”
((pause // leaning in))
“Or perhaps, a singular thrilling night before the sun rises and the fun is over?”
((pause // leaning in))
“Or… are you looking for something darker? Something much more dangerous. Something soul shattering that will devour you whole? Something that makes you question your morals… Your boundaries… Something that will burn you to ash and will leave you begging me for more even once I break you?”
((kisses Wendy))
“Do you know what kind of danger you want yet, darling? That last one… It is not a wise idea for a sweet little lamb like you, but I promise... You’ll love it.”

Hey everyone,
So I will be back at Cedar Point for 3 days, from today to Tuesday. I went in 2019 for the first time and spent a few days on that visit as well(I live in Texas so it's definitely a challenge to make a trip out here). A major reason for my motivation to go back is that I only got 3 rides on Steve TOTAL over the course of a few days to horrendous 2+ hour lines each time. It's my #1, I love it to death, and I absolutely want to get a lot more rides on it this trip. It's my first time going back to Cedar Point since then and I am PUMPED!
There is just one major issue. The RMC restraints are VERY painful for me. I am a 5' 8'' 205 lb guy, and the lapbars are very painful on my thighs on those ejector moments. I don't have any issue with the shin guards(like some people complain about), but it's the lapbar that absolutely hinders the ride experience. I do not have issues with thigh discomfort with any other restraints. The Texas RMC hybrids are no issue since they use Gerstlauer, Maverick is no issue, the new Intamin restraints aren't any problem either. No other restraints are an issue for me, it's the RMC trains specifically.
I have no idea why the RMC trains are this problematic for me. It looks like your typical lapbar like any other, but yet it causes me so much issues for some reason.. No one seems to have any problem with them except for the shin guards, but those aren't a problem for me as I mentioned. It's frustrating, because the ride is still absolutely incredible and is absolutely my #1 despite the pain, but if I can find a decent workaround, it will blow me away even more than it already has.
I already have found somewhat of a workaround. I went to Magic Mountain for the first time this past September, and rode Twisted Colossus 10 times over the course of a few days. It was the second RMC I did that uses those awful restraints, so of course, I had the same thigh pain issue that I did with Steel Vengeance. But on my 7th ride or so, I tried something: I put the seatbelt across my thigh and really tightened it. This helped GREATLY, as the pain was drastically reduced due to basically flying into the seatbelt rather than the lapbar. This did affect the airtime a little bit, but nothing too major. Definitely prefer this over riding in pain.
Since I will be back on SV over the next few days, it will be my first time trying this out on the ride since I discovered this trick over the past year when I rode TC. However, is there any way to make the belt looser so it's not as tight but your thighs still don't slam into the lapbar(with the seatbelt still really softening the blow), and how do you know how tight to make it to find that sweet spot? If this is not a good idea, what else can I do that would help?
Sorry for the wall of text, but thanks for reading and appreciate the help!

I’ll never understand why women are religious. I understand why men are, after all, they are the gods. They are the superiors and we are just the r*apebait, baby making slaves right?
Religions women disgust me. No self-respecting man would ever follow a religion that only/ mainly has female gods, that worships females, that calls females the creators, that has a “father” but can never acc mention that father, that constantly says that they are inferior to women, that men were the cause of the original sin/ that they are rhe root of evil cuz 1 (made up) “person” messed up and now everyone born their gender will have a painful and fucked up life, and so on and so forth. So why do women do it?
This is one of womens’ many flaws imo. Too forgiving. And because of that, i think that religions are right in saying that women are “obedient”. More men are atheists than women. It should be the other way around but women just wont leave this toxic relationship.
Im south asian. Almost all my family is hindu, and i sort of practised it too until i was about 10, then became an atheist. I am 19 now and have everlasting trauma and self-hate from those 10 years and just learning more about the different religions makes them hate them and my self more and more and more and more.
There is a ceremony that some people preform when a girl gets her first period. Absolutely barbaric and this was my breaking point to making me become an atheist. It’s basically am advertisement and it’s lowkey pedophilic cuz the whole idea of it is that they invite everyone and basically say “i have a daughter who can now have kids. So men, come up, and take a gander at her”. Basically saying that this 7-12 yr old is old enough for marriage and to have kids. And it just gives off “if she’s old enough to bleed, she’s old enough to breed” vibes.
And ofc men dont have anything this humiliating cuz why would they? Men actually have DIGNITY in this world that tries to shame, belittle and degrade women from the time we are born!
Oh and also right after i got it. Like the second after i got my first one. My stupid mom called all of her family and told them even when i told her not to. NO RESPECT FOR ME
I never did this stupid thing. I had to fight my parents to not do it and i dont regret what i did. BUT after not doing it, people (random ass family members mainly) would COME UP TO ME AND ASK ME IF I “WAS NORMAL” … NORMAL. THAT IS THE EXACT WORDING THEY USED. ASKED ME IF ANYTHING WAS “WRONG” with me! The answer is no. BUT WHY IS THAT ANYONES BUSINESS. WHY SHOULD MY BUSINESS BE SHARED TO ALL THESE PEOPLE WHO I DONT EVEN KNOW LIKE THIS? Like even if i did have endo or didnt get a period for whatever reason or whatever, THAT WOULD NOT MAKE ME “not NORMAL”. Do we treat anyone else with other diseases/ illnesses like this?! Do we tell people with cancer that they are “not normal”. NO BECAUSE THEY DONT CONTROL THAT (not in every case). They for the most part have condolences and best wishes. but the SECOND it is something that affects cis women, SOCIETY SHAMES THEM INSTEAD OF RESPECTING THEIR PRIVACY OR SHOWING THEM PITY OR CONCERN OR GIVING THEM USEFUL/ WANTED ADVICE
When you are on you period, you are “unclean” and apparently spread cooties or something idk. Just such childish thinking. Cuz ive had family members Litterally SNEEZE AND COUGH IN FOOD or cough without covering their mouths and my mom turns a blind eye to it. Defends them. Says theres nothing wrong and that they are not “actually sick”. But BUT …. If i am on my period and want to touch my own clothes in my own closet. Or if i had just finished my period and haven’t showered yet and go to touch my clothes, TELL ME WHY MY MOM THROWS A HISSY FIT TANTRUM GOING OFF ABOUT HOW IM “CONTAMINATING” all mu clothes and that everything ive touched now had to be washed ?!?!!?!!!?!!???? GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
YELLS AT ME FOR GOING TO THE KITCHEN IN MY OWN HOUSE. YELLS AT ME FOR PASSING THE PRAYER ROOM TO GET TO MY OWN BED ROOM. Like she knew she was raised like this and that she would do that to me. Should have just had an abortion (im from canada) the second she found out that i wasn’t a precious, clean baby boy , but instead am a dirty, impure female.
UK WHAT, just search up what “period huts” are on google 😀 and all the LITTERAL DEATHS THEY CAUSE CUZ PEOPLE WANNA BANISH GIRLS FROM THEIR HOMES FOR SOMETHING WE CAN NOT CONTROL NOT EVEN ALLOWED IN YOUR OWN HOME AND YOU ARE REDUCED TO A STRAY ANIMAL FOR YOUR PERIOD. In fact, despite the fact that these people throw those huge parties to announce a first period, periods are VERY taboo in south asia. To the point where women cant even have/ use pads or carry pads around so they have to resort to using cloth and leaves WHICH CAUSES INFECTIONS
WE HATE OUR GIRLS SO MUCH AND EVERYTHING THAT HAS TO DO WITH THEM THAT WE WOULD RATHER KILL THEM OR MAKE THEM TERRIBLY SICK THAN HELP THEM! Im crying writing this cuz im honestly at a loss for words.
That said, i dont think that hinduism is the worst one out there. There are definitely worse ones but this was just my experience and i needed to vent and maybe teach others some things and give reasons as to why we shouldn’t be following these MAN MADE LIES!

Okay my old acc got perma banned (not cuz of what i posted here but a comment on another sub). This acc probably just gonna get banned too but idk. I need this place to rant and i want to hear others thoughts too. (So sorry if i dont reply to your comment).
There is no reward or pride in being a mom. Dads are the ones with all the prides. I never want kids but i want to be a dad so badly. I would have kids if i could have been the dad.

• Im not wasting 9 months of my life growing that parasite and then pushing it out
• Not to mention all the risks and permanent health implications/ risks. That long ass epidural. Ruining my body. Risk of bleeding out?! Emergency c sections. NOPEE
• Why do the dads get to cut the umbilical cord? They do absolutely nothing but jerk off almost a yr ago and then THEY get to do that?
• im tired of seeing the videos of dads carrying the newborn out of the hospital while A NURSE wheelchairs the new mom out. Like dude … help your fkn wife/ gf who just risked her life?! Like why doesn’t she get to hold the new baby on the way out? Afterall shes been carrying the damn thing for 9 months doing all of the heavy labour then the men just get the easy shit? F THAT
• im tired of seeing men being being praised for doing the BARE FUCKING MINIMUM. and then when people call out that it’s the bare minimum, others defend it by saying “yeahh but dads didnt do anything before so its good to see more hands on dads now”. When women have been “hands on” moms doing EVERYTHING FOREVER AND DONT GET ENOUGH RECOGNITION OR CREDIT AT ALL. dad changes 1 diaper or goes to one swimming class practice w their kids and its “omgggg what a core memory”, “such a good dad”, “parent of the year reward”. Its surprising and rewarded and appreciated and acknowledged when men do it but it’s EXPECTED when women/ moms do it?!
• Why is is the dads name thats the last name. Even if the mom keeps her last name, the kid almost always has his? And i dont wanna hear the dumbass “justification” that “ohhhhh i got to connect w my baby for 9 months. Its his turn now 😁”. JUST STFU YOU DAMN SURROGATE YOU AINT A DAMN PARENT JUST A FREE BIRTHING MACHINE AND FREE NANNY

All women are just disposable baby making machines and surrogates! No pride in that! And i want no part of it! This is not a bash on moms btw. More of a bash on society so dont get the wrong idea from my post.
Plus when you are a mom. You are JUST A MOM. But if youre a dad, then you’re life doesn’t change at all and you are still seem as your own person separate from your kids. You have your own identity while moms are just moms.

When I was like 7/8/9 (I truly can’t remember what age, I’d like to say it is the earliest one but it’s probably 9) I went to this camp for like four days. It was pretty bad overall, didn’t really enjoy it, but it was almost finished. In fact, maybe I was slightly older? Like 10? Now I really can’t remember, I tried tracking what age I could be but I don’t like to ask when I went on it with anyone.
We had went on this big last walk during the final day and my legs had been really itchy for a lot of the walk back. I had no idea why. When we got back each room went back to their own, there was probably about 8 of us in a room, with bunk beds. I had decided to change clothing because I thought it must just be my trousers that had been itching my legs so badly.
When I went to take my trousers off, I scratched and saw that it was dried under my nails, and before I realised what had even happened someone had shouted what had occurred. Then suddenly everyone was running out of the room, I think someone was shouting it, some of them had got other people from a different room, and I guess one of the camp programme leaders. I had pulled my trousers up immediately though. One person had stayed behind and looked with pity.
I think I had just hid badly behind the door, probably in shock. When the leader came and got me. When I think about it now it’s all in third person. He had me taken to one of the really nice en-suite showers (compared to the campers had cubicle ones? I think anyway) and told me I could wash up there.
When I left, my hair was still damp, and I had to walk into an entire hall full of kids, both younger, same age, and older than me, and go up and get my great end of the camping trip hot chocolate. The walk and hot chocolate being the final part of the trip.
(I realise I’m saying camping trip, they were all lodges, and it was doing camping like activities)
Anyway, I walk through a quiet-ish room after a lot of people had stopped talking. I could feel eyes on me. I got my hot chocolate and immediately took a sip only to burn my tongue and cause more attention via my coughing. I probably did that so quickly just to do something rather than stand and think.
I got water and went down to sit at the bench where my good friend/primary school friend sat, with some others. I can’t remember what else we talked about but what he said always stuck with me “don’t worry, everyone makes mistakes” but I could sense he was embarrassed.
The next day, I remember standing waiting to leave, near the car hovering, as my parents spoke to the leader. I assume he told them, but I have no idea because I was too ashamed to ever ask or bring it up.
There was this guy who had brought it up a lot years later. He would walk a similar way home and tried to embarrass me. For years during highschool I would be nervous if he would come out at lunch/see him around/ walking home because he would say it in front of others and I could deal with the embarrassment. I ate so much, stopped at a shop to avoid meeting him on the way home, and would buy tons of food. My obesity has been an even bigger part of my life. I’m not assertive and I lack self-esteem.
It didn’t matter probably because everyone probably knew already. I tried to forget it when it happened, but in first year of highschool, a bit later into it, that friend who was on it with me told a lot of people. I got a fair amount of jokes, and looks. I never mentioned it myself though and just shrank into myself.
It was so long ago but was such a formative part of my life and ended up defining a lot of how I was perceived by everyone. I’m not sure how I feel about it, I think it’s still there, I don’t go a week I would say without thinking about it in some regard. I had always wanted to change my name and move away when I grew up, both because of that and other stuff.
Obviously, it was just some childhood thing and I want to get over it but I find it really hard. I hoped writing this and hearing thought could help but I doubt it. That guy I was friends with was okay after that, and I don’t think I hold a grudge but I don’t know. The other guy I see often as he works somewhere I go (still living at home rn). He never mentioned it, neither have I, but I feel like we both know. I hated him and now I don’t know what I feel.

so! i was originally posting this for my husband on a Christian subreddit, but he and a few friends wanted me to put it here just to see what happened
the gist of it:
My in-laws, we recently found out, have been pretending to like me and lying about their approval of our relationship. We have been together for four years and married for two. We have a child on the way. This just now came out.
His father is a crippling alcoholic. He would regularly beat his mother when my husband was a child and has, to this day, chosen to spend money on alcohol instead of food to feed his family or pets. They regularly came to us asking for either dog food or dinner because they literally had nothing. They owe over 3k to his grandfather from how often they borrow money. His mother would verbally abuse him and his brother, and neglect them because she refused to go to doctors for chronic pain and hormonal issues, and would blow up instead. To the point he once walked around on a broken ankle for months because she thought he was being overdramatic. He was ten when that happened. The only reason it was treated is because his grandfather saw how swollen it was and took him to the ER.
This came to a head when we decided we didn’t want our child to be exposed to that. We tried talking, and somehow it all exploded from there. I will admit I said things that were not appropriate, and my husband did too. If I have a chance to apologize for how I handled it I want too, but I was also threatened and know if I try to contact on social media I will be written very nastily to. But we found out a LOT they have been lying about.
1) they think I was being overdramatic about a miscarriage, and had actually just started my period. I was told this while simultaneously being cussed out. I had a miscarriage!! This is where I started shouting if I’m honest. Should I have, absolutely not, and I regret it now because it only escalated things.
2) I have somehow destroyed this family and my husband didn’t have a problem with anything until he met me. This is literally, factually incorrect. They have several times driven him to attempt to take his life before he had ever met me. His father would regularly mock him for attending therapy as an adult too. He would also insult and mock any interests he had, ANYTHING.
3) Neither of us are allowed to dictate who our child is around, because we aren’t “in charge” of the family and my husband is, according to his father, “a hypocrite who is too soft and isn’t acting like a man.” for trying to talk about how his childhood impacted him. He was then told all of his childhood was in his head and that he needed to figure it out himself. Because my FIL didn’t throw him into walls and beat him.
4) Neither of them have ever liked me, and accused me of using my husband for money and manipulating him into being a liberal. I am not a liberal. I have never been a liberal. Literally don’t even know where they got that from. The only idea I have is that they think me not wanting them to insult all of my husband’s hobbies is somehow making him too soft and therefore a liberal? Or that I don’t like when they randomly start talking about how much they hate gay people and think they’re child molestors?? I feel that’s a normal response from ANYONE. I’ve literally never discussed politics with them if you don’t count me not wanting to listen to that political?
5) We were then essentially kicked out from a family home that was near theres. I was told that only my husband would be allowed back, and that I would never be allowed near them again. They do not know I am pregnant, at this point I’m 5 weeks 6 day, and sincerely worried about how the stress might have impacted my baby. We found out his brother has never liked me either, but refuses to say why. Please note he is a huge mama’s boy, so I’m honestly suspicious that she’s been talking about me for a lot longer than we think.
So! I will be honest, if they hold that view of me I have no qualms not speaking to them. I will add that they both claim to be Christian, but are alcoholics, pop pills, cuss regularly, and have never discussed God, church, or even attended church in over 15 years. The few times I’ve heard them talk about God have been to try and get their own way, or to discuss the end times. They are essentially Christian by word and not action.
My husband hasn’t spoken to his mother at all, and when he tried to talk to his father again was essentially guilt tripped and lied to again. My FIL told him he was contemplating suicide since he was gone, and when my husband told him he was happier on our own, was then told his father was doing better without him too and to never expect any contact from him again. Anything my MIL has texted has boiled down to insulting me and telling him he’ll come crawling back eventually, so he obviously hasn’t responded.

Trying to get an idea of how people are thinking, spoke to a first time voter about who they voted for and they said "Congress", I asked why, "BJP is taking the country towards dictatorship." they replied.
I also see the Dhruv Rathee effect, a lot of how he explained it was how DR articulated it. Made me think very hard of the tangible power of YouTube. (Shouldn't have thought for that long, someone already had done the thinking [ read; political parties already had his video on electoral bonds shown on the streets and corners], a pleasant discovery nevertheless but also a gross generalization.
On social media, the pro-Modi comments on random ass posts have decreased drastically. A lot of converts. People saying, "won't make the mistake I made in 2014 and 2019", a new sort of consciousness is brewing.
On the grassroots however, it's very confusing, while there are ideological supporters, there are a lot of dissatisfied voters, similar converts to the virtual ones. And definitely, many new consciousnesses have emerged here. In the last 10 years we've been through a lot, really.
TLDR; what are your differences with the incumbent government? And if you're a convert, why and how? And the interesting patterns and influences you've seen in this year's voter?

Something I've thought about for a while, especially since:

• Because they have feelings for at least one gender, they have that as "evidence"
  
• The whole trope of "college experimenting" or a "phase". Truth is, it is authentic, but they're so insecure and self-loathing.
  
• Especially with shows where a character realizes their "gay", despite opposite-gender relationships being authentic.
  
• "Sexuality is fluid" instead of just accepting that you could simultaneously be attracted to more than 1 gender.
  

Anyone else's thoughts?
Bonus: I've always thought it's funny how so many people wouldn't want to be bisexual, since that would mean so many sexual opportunities in their small minds.

So, I posted this theory a while back but it seems that most people didn’t read through it due to it being too long. So here I am back again with my best to briefly summarize the theory with the major points of evidence from the comics that I have found. It’s still going to be a lot but, hopefully, this will help get the broad idea across. Then if you have any specific points you can hopefully find them answered in the sections beneath it.
For context, you only need to read the Basic Premise section to get the basic gist of the theory, all the remaining sections are where I outline the evidence to support it.
~Basic Premise~

Nightcrawler is the Winding Way is basically the idea that X-Men’s Nightcrawler got his soul ripped in half when he was a child by his adopted mother – Margali Szardos – who used the magical half of Kurt’s soul to form the source of her power, the Winding Way.
Nightcrawler would have inherited this magical power from Azazel, who he is still technically biologically related to, as well as potentially the combination of genes from Mystique, Destiny, and Baron Wagner.
Amanda Sefton – after seeing Margali use Illyana’s Soul-Sword to obtain power in the Winding Way, took over Limbo to study it before fusing it with Kurt’s soul in the hopes of being able to use the Soul-Sword to undo her mother’s work and restore Kurt to being whole again.
Ultimately, Destiny gave the baby Kurt to Margali knowing full well she would do this to him to hide his true power from Enigma (the Nathaniel Essex that became a Dominion), who she had Kurt concieved in order to defeat.
Additionally, she told Margali of a prophecy about a Soul-Sword falling into Margali’s hands knowing that Margali would attempt to steal Belasco’s Soul-Sword, that Belasco would turn his attention to Nightcrawler to steal that magical power for herself which would result in Illyana being kidnapped by Belasco after he gave up trying to steal the power from Kurt and thus create said Soul-Sword as well as – eventually – the Hope-sword.

~Part 1 – Margali Szardos is the Worst Adoptive Mother of All Time~
Margali Szardos is a powerful witch in Marvel comics who has shown being particularly hungry for magical power – doing everything from manipulating her daughter, Amanda Sefton, into getting her Illyana’s Soul-Sword so that she could use it in a killing spree to obtain magical power from her victims (Excalibur #85), to attempting to steal the power of a demon living under London nearly destroying it in the process (Excalibur #100), to forcibly mind-swapping with her daughter to save herself leaving Amanda to be tortured by Belasco (revealed X-Men: Unlimited #19), opening a magical rift to the World Beyond to obtain its power which forced her daughter to sacrifice herself to close it (4^th Nightcrawler series #1-4), to finally selling Nightcrawler out to ORCHIS to obtain the Hope-sword that was lodged in Kurt’s chest (Legion of X #7-10).
All of these villainous actions raise an important question – why did Margali adopt Nightcrawler? After all, it’s not like Margali went around adopting children – only Nightcrawler. In fact, outside of Kurt, the only other child that Margali has ever displayed an interest in obtaining was a young Scarlet Witch (Mystic Arcanum: Scarlet Witch) which is concerning given just how magically powerful Scarlet Witch is.
This all points to the idea that Margali only took Kurt in because she got something out of it – very likely magical power. This wouldn’t be nearly so concerning if Margali Szardos wasn’t also the Sorceress Supreme of one of the most mysterious and unexplained magical systems in all of Marvel.
~Part 2 – The Winding Way is WIERD~
So, I’m just going to come out and say it - the Winding Way makes no sense in the current understanding of magic in Marvel Comics. Even characters like Dr. Strange – one of Marvel’s masters of magic – has basically no idea how the Winding Way actually operates. There is a data page in Legion of X #9 that outlines the basics of what the Winding Way is and how it operates.
According to the data page, the Winding Way is an exocentric magic system – that is to say a form of magic that is powered by an external source to the user – which its various wielders experience cycles of power and powerlessness. As far as characters like Strange are aware, it remains unclear if there is a physical “Way” or if that is simply metaphor.
The strange thing about the Winding Way is that there is no other magical system in Marvel where this cycle of users having powers and being powerless is even a thing. Whenever an exocentrically powered sorcerer loses their powers, it is always a form of punishment. This is true with Dr. Strange when he lost 99% of his powers back during the War of the Seven Spheres story. This is true with Juggernaut who loses his powers whenever he and Cyttorak – the entity that powers the crimson gem that Juggernaut uses for his powers. It’s even true for someone like Thor and his hammer. No where else in Marvel is there a system of magic where cycles of power is a thing.
All of this raises the question of whether the fluctuating cycles of power the Winding Way are actually a natural part of the Winding Way or whether they due to something else – like, say the power source of the Winding Way trying to continuously punish the various practitioners but being unable to due to their attention being split up.
Ultimately, the only truth that we can glean about the Winding Way is that nobody but the practitioners of the Winding Way ultimately know how it works and even then, characters like Margali and Amanda have proven time and again that their word cannot be trusted.
~Part 3 – the Szardos Family, Cthon, & Wundagore Mountain~
Interestingly, a different Sorcerer Supreme Sgt. Sebastian Szardos – the Sorcerer Supreme of World War II – has his own insights about the Winding Way, though they are rather vague. Firstly, in the 8^th series of Avengers #50, Sebastian claims that the Winding Way has ties with Mt. Wundagore – which was famously the tomb of Cthon before Scarlet Witch absorbed him. This seems to suggest that the Winding Way originates either via Cthon or his creation – the Darkhold.
What is more interesting is that the Winding Way doesn’t seem to be practiced during the time of the Second World War as Sgt. Szardos states that only his great grandmother on his mothers side even knew about the Winding Way – Sebastian himself clearly wasn’t a practicing member. This is peculiar as Margali Szardos demonstrates an unusual amount of familiarity with the position of Sorcerer Supreme in Uncanny X-Men Annual #4 when she stole the Eye of Agamotto off of Dr. Strange with a mere gesture. Given that Sebastian and Margali share the last name and Sebastian was a known former Sorcerer Supreme while Margali – as far as I can tell – has never been, this would seem to suggest that there is some sort of familial connection between Margali and Sebastian. This in turn seems to suggest that the Winding Way experienced some sort of revival with Margali.
My theory is that the Winding Way started out as a sort of ritual that originated with the Darkhold and was initially practiced by the Szardos family over the centuries to siphon power off of Cthon to keep him in check and imprisoned - hence why there are other Szardos clan members such as Theodosia as shown in that run of Avengers. This would mean that if my theory of Nightcrawler being the Winding Way is true, then it would mean that he is only the current source of the Winding Way.
~Part 4 – Nightcrawler is still related to Azazel (and Azazel is a demon)~
Now a major aspect in this is that Nightcrawler is where exactly would Nightcrawler’s magical powers come from? After all, he’s the son of Mystique and Destiny – two mutants with no sort of magical capabilities, right? Well, that’s… complicated.
Firstly, it’s important to note that the X-Men Origins: Blue retcon is… frankly, not very well thought out. There are a bunch of things that it just gets plain wrong and contradict a bunch of previously established X-Men lore – everything from the fact that Destiny would have been too old to give birth to Nightcrawler, to Rogue’s age being way too young (she was adopted by D&M when she was 13 not 5), to the fact that Mystique canonically cannot mimic mutant x-genes - meaning Nightcrawler shouldn’t have teleportation with this retcon, and much, much more. On top of all that, the fact that the only evidence supporting the idea that it ever even happened is from Mystique and Destiny – two of Marvel’s most notorious liars – and you got yourself an extremely messy and rather dubious retcon.
Putting all that aside, going based on what the retcon has established there are a few ways in which Kurt might have inherited some sort of magical power.
Primarily, Kurt is still technically related to Azazel – yes, Mystique “mimicked” Azazel’s DNA in Kurt’s conception but given that in genetics it is the sequence of DNA that matters and not the source of that sequence, Mystique’s “Mimicked” DNA is still ostensibly Azazel’s DNA. Azazel is an established master of dark magic – specifically soul magic – and used to rule over a legit Hell Dimension during the time of Kurt’s birth – making him a legit hell lord similar to Mephisto or Dormammu. Given that Hell Lords are also considered the Sorcerer Supremes (as in the strongest) of their respective dimension, this would suggest that Azazel once held some major power, regardless of if he’s a demon or not. And as it has been established, magic is inheritable as shown with Clea (the daughter of Umar), Daimon Hellstrom (son of Marduk Kurios), and at least half the cast of Strange Academy, it would stand to reason that Nightcrawler could also inherit magical power from him.
Now, I know what you are saying – “But, Azazel isn’t a demon! Chuck Austen said so!” And while, yes, Chuck Austen has clearly gone on record to say that Azazel is only a demonic looking mutant instead of an actual demon, it’s been kind of invalidated by the thing that every other writer for Azazel – including the likes of Chris Claremont – have referred to Azazel as a demon at least once either on-panel or in interviews. And frankly, there’s nothing in the lore that says that Azazel cannot be both a demon and a mutant – after all, Magik is both a demon and a mutant at the same time. And let’s be real here, Chuck Austen doesn’t deserve nice things when it comes to the X-Men.
However, Azazel is not the only DNA that Mystique apparently mimicked – Baron Christian Wagner was also added onto that list for some reason. This is odd as why would Destiny and Mystique feel the need to include Baron Wagner at all in the genetic makeup of Nightcrawler unless there was something special about the Baron. However, the only uniquely genetic thing we learn about him is that he’s seemingly infertile – which may suggest that there is some sort of genetic anomaly going on with him, such as maybe a repressed X-gene.
~Part 5 – Amanda Sefton/Jimaine Szardos history in Marvel Comics~
Another aspect of this theory is that – if it is true – it suddenly explains a lot of what Kurt’s ex, Amanda Sefton has been doing in comics since she was first introduced in 1976. You see, Amanda Sefton followed Kurt back from Germany and began dating him under a different name – which Kurt was not aware of. She only reveals the truth after the events of Uncanny X-Men Annual #4. This unfortunately supports Kurt’s accusation in Uncanny X-Men #206 that Amanda used a spell to make Kurt fall in love with her to begin with – an accusation which Amanda has never confirmed nor denied.
Amanda’s peculiar behavior continued into Excalibur where she was manipulated by Margali into obtaining Illyana’s Soul-Sword from Kitty Pryde – who had previously given the Soul-Sword to Dr. Doom and then Darkoth, with it returning to her both times. Upon obtaining the Soul-Sword, Margali then used it to go on a killing spree against the other members of the Winding Way to obtain their power for herself. Following this, Margali’s failed attempt to steal the power of a demon beneath London, and Kurt and Margali rescuing Amanda from Belasco after Margali body-swapped with her daughter to save her own skin – Amanda ended up taking over Limbo, supposedly in the name of protecting earth.
However, then we have the smoking gun of Amanda’s meddling – during the 3^rd Nightcrawler solo series, it is revealed that Amanda fused the Soul-Sword with Nightcrawler without telling him. Her reason for doing so? “To protect the Soul-Sword from falling into the wrong hands.” This lie is so glaringly bad that not even Nightcrawler buys it and he calls Amanda out for not being honest with him.
~Part 6 – Amanda’s Bad Lie and What it Means~
And frankly why would anyone believe Amanda’s claim? Amanda is a sorceress – which means that she is infinitely more qualified than Nightcrawler to keep the Soul-Sword safe than he is. Even if she couldn’t do so, why didn’t she take the Soul-Sword to someone like Dr. Strange?
On top of that, Amanda took the Soul-Sword away from Kitty Pryde claiming that Kitty wasn’t qualified to keep the Soul-Sword safe due to her not being a trained sorceress. Well, guess who’s also not trained in sorcery and thus – by Amanda’s own logic - would not be able to keep the Soul-Sword safe? Nightcrawler.
Except, Kitty technically was able to keep the Soul-Sword out of the wrong hands – back during Excalibur #37 she phased the Soul-Sword into a rock which even Rachel Summers channeling the power of the Phoenix Force was not able to remove it from – it wasn’t removed until Doom came knocking and got Kitty to willingly remove it for him. So why couldn’t Amanda do something similar? Why fuse it with Kurt and endanger him?
And to top it all off, Amanda still needed the Soul-Sword. She was ruling over Limbo – a dangerous hell dimension full of power-hungry demons. Her magical powers are of the Winding Way – meaning that they wax and wane. So quite literally, Amanda needs the Soul-Sword – a weapon which every demon in Limbo fears – to keep herself in power; something which was proven in New X-Men #37 when Belasco walked back into Limbo and ousted her.
~Part 7 – Amanda took over Limbo to learn about the Soul-Sword~
So, what was Amanda really up to? Well, to understand Amanda’s actions in the 3^rd Nightcrawler series, we first need to go back to Amanda’s actions in previous series. What’s interesting is that Amanda’s interest in the Soul-Sword was first manifest through Margali – who reveals in Excalibur: Minus One that there is a prophecy that the Soul-Sword would pass first into Margali’s hands and then into Amanda’s hands but would result in both of their dooms.
However, Amanda doesn’t really demonstrate any sort of interest in the Soul-Sword until after Margali used it to obtain power in the Winding Way during Excalibur. While she didn’t get the opportunity to act after the events of Margali’s failed London project due to her mother mind-swapping with her, Amanda’s actions in taking over Limbo after X-Men: Unlimited #19 was more likely due to Amanda wanting to obtain and learn more about the Soul-Sword than about her trying to protect earth.
You see, as Limbo was in no position to even threaten earth until Belasco had obtained the Soul-Sword following Margali ending up there – meaning that if Amanda had simply obtained the Soul-Sword and left Limbo, Limbo would not have been able to endanger Earth. Instead, Amanda stayed. Why? Because if there was anywhere in the universe where you wanted to learn about a Soul-Sword and how it works, Limbo is the dimension to do so.
~Part 8 – Nightcrawler and Magik are… Soulmates?~
So, why did Amanda fuse the Soul-Sword with Nightcrawler? Well, ultimately because a major function of the Soul-Sword is that it can be used as a countercharm which can undo other spells – potentially meaning that Amanda could use it to undo the Winding Way and restore the two halves of Kurt’s soul back together again.
However, another aspect of the Soul-Sword is that it is dangerous to magical creatures and Kurt’s magical soul would already be weakened after years of being separated. Amanda must have figured that if she bonded the non-magical half of Kurt’s soul to the Soul-Sword would allow for her to bypass the more dangerous aspects of the Soul-Sword and allow her to restore Kurt.
And as a result of Amanda’s meddling, when a demonically possessed Pixie ripped the Soul-Sword out of Nightcrawler during X-Infernus, it left behind a void in Kurt’s Soul as established in Legion of X #10, which allowed for the Hopesword to later form. This also seemingly gave Illyana’s Soul-Sword a new ability to damage Techno-Organic beings which it did not possess before. This also means that Nightcrawler and Magik are… soul-mates(?) for the lack of a better term, as they are both bound together through the Soul-Sword after Amanda undid Illyana’s bond with Kitty, though this fact has never been established or confirmed in the comics.
~Part 9 – Destiny caused Magik to be kidnapped by Belasco~
Now, I noted in an earlier section that Margali’s fascination with the Soul-Sword was as a result of a prophecy – one that has at least partially come true. The prophecy as laid out during a flashback in Exalibur: Minus One was that the Soul-Sword would pass from into Margali’s hands and then Amanda’s but would result in both of their dooms. Illyana’s Soul-Sword was indeed obtained by Margali back in Excalibur #85 before she lost it to Belasco after falling to Limbo and the Soul-Sword was obtained again by Amanda after taking Limbo over in X-Men: Unlimited #19.
Now, this whole situation is peculiar as Margali herself is not a precog – outside of this one time, we never even hear her do anything similar ever again. However, we know that Destiny is a precog and we also know that she was the one who gave Kurt to Margali, as per the X-Men Origins: Blue retcon, meaning that this prophecy more than likely originates with Destiny. And really, this shouldn’t be a surprise – Mystique hinted at having some sort of a connection with Margali as far back as UXM #142 when she first met Nightcrawler, it was just never clarified what that connection was.
However, this prophecy would have been given to Margali before the Soul-Sword was ever made and before Illyana was even born, which means that either Destiny could predict Illyana being kidnapped by Belasco and creating the Soul-Sword as a result… or she caused Belasco to kidnap Illyana and create the Soul-Sword as a result.
Now, you may question how that’s even possible? After all, how could Destiny cause someone like Belasco to do something when the two haven’t even canonically met?
Well, for this, I would like to point out the unexplained animosity going on between Margali Szardos and Belasco. This is a rivalry that has been mentioned quite a few times – such as back in Excalibur: Minus One, X-Men: Unlimited #19, and the 3^rd Nightcrawler series. For some unexplained reason, Margali Szardos and Belasco have a lot of enmity for one another.
So, what’s the cause of this rivalry? Well, during the Dark Web event, Mary Jane Watson and Black Cat were captured by Belasco and sent to retrieve his Soul-Sword – which, as it is explained in the story is something that Belasco could not potentially use up until the events of Dark Web.
So here’s an idea – what if Destiny didn’t specify which Soul-Sword would end up in Margali’s hands, causing Margali to immediately assume that she was talking about Belasco’s (as that would have been the only one in existence at that point) and try to steal it from him.
This then drew Belasco’s attention and caused him to realize that Nightcrawler was somehow the source of Margali’s powers. This would be why Belasco even had his eyes on the X-Men to begin with and why there was a soulless Nightcrawler back in the original Magik series – Kurt was Belasco’s original target. However, the soulless Nightcrawler and Belasco’s obvious shift in attention to Illyana clearly points to the idea that whatever experiments Belasco tried to use to obtain that magical power from Kurt, it only ended in disaster – causing him to turn to Illyana as a replacement.
~Part 10 – the Big Picture… stopping Enigma~
So, if Destiny was ultimately the cause behind all of this – from orchestrating Kurt’s birth, to handing him off to Margali, to telling Margali the prophecy about the Soul-Sword, what is it all ultimately for?
Well, what it is almost certainly not for is the given answer of defeating Azazel. Simply put, Azazel has never been so major of a threat that creating a super special prophecy child was needed. Heck, he was killed in Dark X-Men by the demonic version of Nightcrawler, so how difficult would it have been for Mystique and Destiny to do it? No, Azazel’s defeat was a bonus that Irene used to justify Kurt’s birth to Raven, not the focus.
Ultimately, there’s only one answer as to who Kurt was conceived to stop – Enigma. The original Nathaniel Essex who transcended space and time and who Irene knew to be an existential threat to all Mutantkind.
This answer even explains some of Irene’s other past actions, such as why she was involved with the Black Womb project – yes, she was keeping an eye on Sinister, but she was also learning as much about the mutant x-gene in preparation for Kurt’s birth.
It also explains why she handed Kurt over to Margali at all – the Winding Way is described in the datapages of Legion of X as being something akin to a No-Place – something that Enigma and other Dominions famously have trouble seeing into. Thus, by hiding Kurt’s magical half in the No-place until the time was right and creating the means by which to release him from that prison, Destiny ensures Enigma’s defeat.
Or does she? Because as far as the current X-Men comics have been going, there is nowhere near the development needed to have my theory take place. At this point, only the Hopesword is established which begs the question of whether the Winding Way is meant to be the thing to stop Enigma or if the Hopesword is. As of this point in X-Men Forever (2024) #4, the Hopesword is what was needed to stop Enigma… for some reason. So far, all that the sword has accomplished is being handed off from Kurt to Exodus to Hope… who was then killed by the Phoenix and sent the Hopesword back to Kurt. We’ll have to wait and see if anything else comes of it.
Personally though, I kind of like the idea that everything Destiny did in orchestrating the creation of the Hopesword and/or the Winding Way was kind of a pointless thing in the end. It’s kind of poignant for Destiny’s character – being the same woman who thought that killing Senator Kelly would prevent the Days of Future’s Past Timeline when she was in fact going to cause that very timeline to happen – to have all her manipulations and schemes to create this weapon against the existential threat that Enigma presented… only to have that threat be dealt with in some other way, leaving Irene to deal with the consequences of her own actions and question whether it was worth putting Kurt through all of that. Maybe that’s just me though.
Conclusion
So yeah, that’s most of the evidence supporting this theory. There are a few other things – such as Margali potentially being the reason why Kurt was killed during Second Coming and potentially causing his mental break down during the Extraordinary X-Men story, but those are more auxiliary to these major points.
But yeah, let me know what you guys think down below. Do you think this theory is onto something or is it way off base?

So, just like the title says, our host just went dormant, and it’s affecting us other alters, because we have no idea how to react to this. He’s always been super depressed about everything, and we’ve always tried to keep him up in spirits, but I guess tonight was his breaking point. It seems as if I’m the new host for now? He’s always been our host, and it’s affected our system a bit badly. He’s the one who’s mained and hosted the most through out our life, and has only been like this once when I myself took over for a few months forcefully to change our life about a decade ago. I don’t want to make the same mistakes as I did before, because it truly affected our life negatively in the long run. However, I truly have no idea what to do right now. How do we get him out of dormancy? He’s always been the strongest of us mentally, even though he’s always been depressed. The system feels … lonely … without him here. Is there anyway for us to forcibly wake him from dormancy? If we can’t wake him from his dormancy, I’m thinking of going dormant myself, and giving Gatekeeper and host to another of our alters named Jerome, but I don’t know what to do. Him and I are truly the only sane two in our headspace, who can interact with other people.
-Elby