Cartoon picture of elderley playing bingo

You guys know what an alpine coaster is? They are like a small roller coaster you find in the mountains. They are also called summer toboggans or mountain coasters and I think there’s some long German compound word they are called in parts of Europe. They are like a roller coaster, but with much smaller one or two person sleds you just sit on instead of multi-person cars you ride in, and instead of being built with like a scaffolding or a framework the tracks are just on the ground, using the elevation of the mountain. Basically it’s a coaster track on the side of a mountain where you ride a sled down.
They are pretty fun. Or at least I used to think so. They are more “personal” than roller coasters and although you get nowhere near the speed on them that you do on a good traditional roller coaster and they can’t do corkscrews or loops or anything like that the openness and simplicity of the ride gives an impression of a much greater speed. You’re just sitting there with nothing but a little plastic sled and the track between you and the ground as it goes zooming by. It’s like the difference between how fast a go-cart feels compared to how fast a sports car feels. You know the sports car goes faster but the open, simpleness of a go-cart feels a different kind of fast. There’s plenty of POV Youtube videos if you want to get the basic idea of what they are.
I used to love alpine coasters. Used to.
My family used to go to Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge and up and down the Smokey Mountains for vacations when I was a kid and they are common in that area and I’d always rode them every chance I got.
But as with so many things after I grew up and went to college they just became part of my childhood that slipped away. They aren’t exactly common once you get away from the mountains.
Until one cool spring afternoon in 2004. I was in my final year at college and I was driving back to campus in Tennessee after a short visit to my folks in North Carolina. It was only like a 4 or 5 hour drive via the most efficient route and I had no need to be back at campus early so instead of taking the freeway all the way I got off and took part of my trip through the mountains. The scenery was nicer and I admit I liked pushing my Camaro just a little faster than I should through the twisty mountain roads.
Just after lunchtime happened upon one of those little by-the-highway tourist towns deep somewhere in the Smoky Mountains near the Carolina/Tennessee border. Nothing fancy, a gas station/truck stop, a diner, a couple of places selling tourist merch nestled deep in the mountains. I pulled into the gas station. My tank was getting low and I needed to stretch my legs, maybe grab something to eat. It was still early and I only had another couple of hours. I could kill an hour or so and still make it back to campus at a decent hour.
I pulled into the gas station and was filling my tank when I happened to glance across the road and… well I’ll be damned. There it was. “The Blue Ridge Alpine Coaster.” Nestled on the side of the mountain was a building, a mockup of a red barn, where a single railed track that led up into the mountains, where it soon got lost in the greenery. Wooden hand painted standees of cartoon character bears dressed in stereotypical “Hillbilly” getup stood around, some of them holding signs showing the ride hours and ticket costs and other info. I had to admit, as silly as it was, it made me smile.I finished pumping my gas and, well, nostalgia is a helluva thing. I decided then and there I could waste a little time riding an Alpine Coaster again after all these years before getting back on the road.
I parked my car in a corner of the truck stop's parking lot, put my phone in the center console, this being the days before smart phones when people didn’t keep their phones with them 24/7 and I didn’t want my old Nokia brick phone to fall out during the ride, locked my car and walked across the mountain highway to the Alpine Coaster building.
Getting closer, the place was less inviting. The half hearted attempt at a whimsical faux-Americana kitsch was far less effective when it brushed up against the actual decaying, run down wooden building. Hell calling it a building was generous. It was a wood frame holding up a long roof that covered the area where you got on the sleds. The wood boards creaked under my footsteps.
The only real enclosed structure was a shack that held, what I assumed, was a ticket booth. A door on the side had both a single occupancy bathroom with an out of order sign on it. An old Pepsi machine buzzed and glowed next to it.
Still the place looked alive. Ahead of me a bored looking attendant was helping a mother and her young son into one of the sleds while in a bored monotone repeating the safety brief. A few people were waiting in line at the ticket booth. Up in the mountains the playful shouts of people on the ride echoed down. Fond memories of my own childhood rides flooded my mind.10 minutes and 15 dollars later I was settling into the hard plastic seat of a bright red sled sat atop a simple aluminum rail.
I couldn’t help but grin as the sled slowly climbed the track up the mountains, making click-clack ratcheting sounds that hit my nostalgia centers hard. I felt good. The air was cool and crisp and smelled of pine.Higher and higher in the mountains we went. I don’t know if this is my mind trying to make sense of it after the fact but when I remember these moments, the last good moments, I sometimes think I remember a very slight, very subtle pit of fear in my stomach. I honestly don’t know if I felt it at the time or not or it’s just how my mind tries to make sense of it looking back at.
But either way mostly I was enjoying myself. I smiled. I was a kid again. I could hear riders in front of me let out that initial yell of terrified glee you get at the first drop of any good ride.
It peaked. I glanced around. I could see for miles, rolling hills and mountains. I the sled tipped over and zoomed down the mountain and I let out the same happy yell I heard from the other passengers.The ride zoomed down the mountain, catching speed. The mountain forest floor zoomed past, only a few feet under me. Trees zoomed past. I gave out a happy whoop as the ride banked hard around a curve and then looped back under itself.Another dip, another curve. I closed my eyes, enjoying the feel of the G-forces pulling me every which way.
There was no one exact single moment where things started to go “wrong.” The ride kept going. And going. At this point the first creeping thought entered my head.
The ride… was still going.
It just started to hit me… this ride was going on for a really long time. I had taken a dozen rides on various coasters of this type before that day and they topped out at about 5 minutes or so, and that was the long ones. Longer than a traditional roller coaster but not that long. This one had been going on for what felt like 10, maybe even 15 minutes.
I looked back over my shoulder and could only see trees, moving too fast to really get a bearing on where I was at in relation to anything.
I wasn't exactly really worried yet. Okay so I had found a particularly long alpine coaster. At the time I wasn’t 100% wasn't sure they didn’t exist or anything like that. I was a little… unnerved but nothing was happening that was impossible. Yet.
I was trying to talk myself back into just enjoying the ride and stop overthinking it, and halfway succeeded, when out of nowhere I suddenly banked hard, the track jutting out almost over a sheer cliffside. I gripped the sled more tightly as I was whipped around. The ride then dipped hard and picked up speed, barreling down the side of the mountain.
I was pushed back against the seat by the force of the drop. Jesus I didn’t remember them being this rough. I was feeling slightly nauseous. And where had this elevation drop come from I wondered? I was still in the foothills and I didn’t remember seeing anything but gentle rolling hills and light drops from looking at the ride’s route earlier. How the ride had managed such a long, steep drop in this area I didn’t know. . For the first time I hoped that the ride would be over soon. I had no idea then how much I would want that same hope to be true so much more as time went on.
With a whiplash motion I was whipped forward and then back as the ride leveled out on flat ground again, but by this point I was going fast, too fast. My neck hurt from the mild whiplash and I felt sour in my throat and for a moment the contents of my stomach threatened to come back up. For the first, but hardly the last time the ride felt unsafe. Alpine Coasters are tame affairs, much slower and gentler than full on roller coasters but this thing was throwing me around like no thrill ride I had ever been on.
I looked around. I mean I wasn’t that deep into the woods. I should have been able to see a glimpse of something; the highway, the gas station, the tourist shops, the Alpine Coaster office, something, anything. But nothing. Just trees.
I forced back some panic for the first time. I closed my eyes and counted to ten. The ride zoomed along. I counted to 60. I counted to 60 again. And again. Okay this was getting uncomfortably harder and harder to explain.
Suddenly I noticed that up ahead the track seemed to just end, for one brief, terrible moment I thought the track just ended but I was wrong. Almost without warning the track dipped in an almost vertical drop. I almost screamed as I plummeted for 20, maybe 30 seconds before flattening out again.
By this point the voice in my head that was telling me something was wrong was louder and I could no longer tell myself it was wrong. This ride could not have been this long. I tried to make sense of it, wondering if somehow I had gotten diverted onto some kind of maintenance track or, hell for one brief irrational moment even entertaining the idea that I had wound up on an actual train track somehow. But that was absurd. The rail below me was not a train track, it was still just the simple, aluminum rail of an alpine coaster and there had been no diversions or junctions in the track. I was still on the ride, as insane as that was starting to feel. Had the ride somehow looped? Again after having the thought I immediately dismissed it as crazy. There’s no way I could have missed the ride building where I got on. And what kind of ride loops over and over?
The sled zoomed through the forest, oddly never seeming to lose speed despite the relatively flat grade of the track. I cursed myself for leaving my phone in the car and not wearing a watch. I don’t know exactly how long I had been on the ride at that point but it felt like I had been on the ride for a half hour, maybe more. But time is a funny thing when you’re in a situation you’ve never been in. Could have been more, could have been less, at that point.
My pride finally failed me. I started to scream for help. I screamed out that the ride was broken, to stop it, that I needed help. I did that for about ten minutes or so I think. The ride kept going. Mostly flat, level track with occasional mild dips and turns. But the simple length of the ride grew more and more unnerving and unexplainable.
I thought about just bailing out. But the ride, impossibly, was still not slowing down and chunks of mountain rock and thick tree trunks were all around me. Bailing out without risking smashing into a rock or a tree seemed impossible.
The ride kept going.
Up ahead the forest was clearing out some, I could see the forest brightening, more sunlight making it through the canopy.
I wasn’t prepared for what I saw.
The trees stopped and I had just enough time to take in a flat, open area of rock maybe 40, 50 yards at most before another sheer cliff. The tracks twisted and turned and then shot straight down. But that wasn’t the worst of it. For a moment, a very short moment, I had a clear view for miles and the landscape was, to be blunt, totally impossible. Any possibility that I had just stumbled on some incredibly long ride was blasted out of my head. Barren, volcanic looking rock stretched for miles. Jagged, black rocky outcroppings as far as the eye could see. I was in the goddamn Smoky Mountains. They don’t look like that.
I had a few moments for the terror of that view to settle in before the cart plunged into another horrifying drop. I gripped the handles of the cheap plastic sled until my knuckles turned white. The drop felt completely vertical, like I was falling at terminal velocity. I screamed. My stomach dropped and turned. I imagined the sled coming away from the track and me just plummeting screaming to my death on the rocks below. But somehow the ride still functioned. I closed my eyes tightly and just waited for whatever was going to happen. Eventually after several what felt like a full minute of steep plunging the track again leveled out, and I opened my eyes to see myself moving at breakneck speed over that black, rocky landscape.
Now that I was moving on a more or less flat horizontal track again I took a few deep breaths. I looked over the edge of the track. Nothing but that black, jagged rock, almost looking like obsidian, zooming past. I had no idea how fast the sled was moving now. Fast. Faster than a gravity powered sled should be moving. And the track was higher off the ground now. Alpine slides usually stick pretty close to the ground, but I was 20 feet or so in the air, the track suspended in the air, a simple metal tube tower like a power pylon every few yards.
Without any immediate threat and the sled moving fast but steadily and level I was able to think about my situation again, for all the good that did me. Ahead of me the track just continued to the horizon, nothing but the same rocky landscape as far as I could see. I craned my neck to look back over my shoulder and looked back behind me and it looked the same. Even the mountains were but distant specs on the horizon behind me.
This was insane. There’s not a giant seemingly endless field of black jagged rock in the goddamn Smoky Mountains. There’s no cliff faces tall and steep enough for a multi-minute vertical drop. And alpine coasters were small affairs, not major engineering projects that span miles with pylons and vertical tracks. It made no sense.
Sadly it wasn’t going to start making any more sense anytime soon.
The ride kept going.
I was on this rocky landscape for several hours. I feel comfortable saying this because I could actually notice the sun getting lower in the sky. And the sled wasn’t slowing down despite the grade of the track being flat. I was getting cramped from sitting and stretched my legs and twisted my back as best I could. Didn’t do much help. My eyes were starting to get irritated from the constant wind in them. Worst of all it was starting to get chilly. I only had on a light jacket, a windbreaker, just something to keep the breeze off me, no real insulation. I was cold, my joints were stiff, I was hungry and thirsty. My eyes watered and my throat was so dry it was sore.
But none of that was as bad as just how little sense this all made. There’s nothing like this place anywhere near the Smoky Mountains. This was like some volcanic rock landscape. The more I thought about it the less sense it made.
The ride kept going.
My mind didn’t even try to process this. Whatever I was experiencing simply couldn’t be possible. I was crazy. I was dreaming. The CIA had kidnapped me and dosed me with some new version of LSD and I was in a straightjacket in a padded room at Area 51.
The sled kept zooming along as the sky turned to dusk. Soon the bridge disappeared from my view and I continued on along the endless, rocky, featureless landscape.
I sat back against the sled, mentally and physically numb. I was exhausted. I was thirsty. I was cramping up. I was hungry. I had to pee. I held it for as long as I could, then had no choice but just wet myself. I cried until I had no more tears left. Then I just sat there.
The ride kept going.
By the time the sun dipped below the horizon my throat felt like sandpaper. I dug around in my jacket pockets hoping to find a stick of gum or piece of candy. Nothing. I checked again, having nothing else to do. Under a crumpled store receipt in the inner pocket of my jacket was a single old, forgotten cough drop. I unwrapped it from the paper and popped it in my mouth. Saliva flooded back into my mouth and I was overwhelmed by the methanol and medicine taste. It was something at least, although I knew it would be a brief and temporary fix at best.
I felt my eyes get heavy. It was getting colder. That mountain cold. That deep cold the mountains have even into the early spring when the sun goes down. That kind that just pulls the heat right out of you. I shivered. A terrible, horrible certainty came to me. I would ride until I passed out from exhaustion or the hypothermia set in. My body would tumble off the sled to fall and skip across the rocky ground like a stone skipping across a lake, my bones breaking as I tumbled until my body finally came to a stop. If I was lucky I would be killed and not have to lie for days, broken and bruised, on the ground until death took me.
The ride kept going. The ride kept going. The fucking ride kept going.
“Fuck you” I said to the ride, my voice a horse whisper. I pulled my jacket closer around me, for all the good it did. The cold wind was slowly but surely pulling my body heat away. My shivering got worse, crossing the line from a simple normal shiver into those deep, almost violent full body ones.. I wasn’t anything you could call an experienced outdoorsman, but I knew enough to know that wasn’t a good sign.
It was getting dark. There was a full moon at least so I wasn’t totally in the dark.
About then I noticed something. The landscape, what little I could see in the fading light, was changing. It was smoothing out, becoming less rocky and craggy. Up ahead an odd, shimmering light was starting to appear on the ground.
I was over it before I even realized what it was. The tracks were going over a smooth surface.
Water. It was a lake. The odd lights I had seen were the moon, reflected in ripples on the lake.
Within minutes I was out of the view of the land. After the nearly endless rocky landscape and everything else I had seen, it scared me how little I was shocked. I didn’t like how mentally numb I was getting. I leaned over. There was enough moonlight to see the water, 15 or 20 feet below the track. The pylons holding up the track went into the water, the light wasn’t good enough to even make a guess at how far they went down or how deep the water was.I leaned back in the sled. My eyes were red and bloodshot from the constant wind. I closed them. This was a mistake.I jerked awake. I don’t know if I dozed off for a split second or an hour. My weight had shifted and I caught myself as my center of gravity was in danger of sending me off the sled and into the water.
I screamed in anger. A deep primal scream. I hurt so bad. My joints felt like they were full of glass. My limbs were full of pins and needles. I glanced over at the water. For the first time on the very edges of my brain a tiny voice started to speak up, telling me that I could be all over if I just jumped. I shut the voice up, but it scared me still.
I sat there as the ride went on. It felt like hours. Eventually the lake ended in a rocky shore line. The damned ride. There was no safe place to bail out. If the ride slowed down, it was high in the air, if it moved toward the ground it sped up. Sharp rocks, big trees, nothing you could safely bail out into.
I kept having to force myself awake. I kept dozing off. Once I felt myself falling asleep and drove a vicious uppercut into my own nose to stave it off.
I seriously started to think about how much longer I could hang on. The voice came back again. This time I didn’t shut it up. I wasn’t admitting it to myself yet, but I was starting to think about the best way to land that would end it quickly if I needed to.
Something was ahead. The track seemed to dip into the ground. I was too tired, too beaten to even get scared. I was just resigned to whatever happened at this point.
With little warning the track took my sled into a tunnel in the ground. Everything went completely pitch black. After several moments even the dim moonlight was gone.
This was the worst part. The creepy forest, the immense rocky landscape, the eerie lake… those were bad. But this was just nothing. Nothing to look at, nothing to hear, nothing for reference or sense of where I was going. The walls of the tunnel felt like they were inches from me in every direction. The air felt thick, like there wasn’t enough oxygen.
With every moment I was in that tunnel I lost a little more hope. After a long, long time I made a decision. When I got out of this tunnel, I would jump. I didn’t care anymore. Hopefully there would be a spot where I could be certain the fall would instantly kill me. I was done. The ride had beaten me. I sat there, waiting for a chance to end this on my terms. That was all I had left.
Eventually up ahead, a tiny speck of light appeared. I gathered my strength, ready to end it. I sat up, getting my legs under me so I could jump as soon as we were clear. The sled burst out of the tunnel. The dim light of the full moon was enough to be momentarily blinding after the pitch black of the tunnel.. I gave my eyes a moment to adjust.
I was back in a normal looking Appalachian forest. Rolling hills, green trees. The air smelled of pine again. I heard an owl hoot off somewhere.
Slowly I lowered myself back into a setting position, in shock. At first I refused to believe it but the ride was slowing down. I held still, making sure my mind wasn’t playing tricks on me, but no, the cheap plastic sled that had been my world for what felt like an eternity was slowing down.
Up ahead, a structure was visible, peeking out from among the trees in the dim lighting as the sled moved down the track.
It was the Alpine Slide building. The crappy fake red barn where I had boarded this cursed ride so long ago. I blinked and rubbed my eyes, sure it was either my mind or the cursed ride playing tricks with me. But the building stayed there.
It grew closer and closer. The track leveled completely out. The sled slowed down more. Before I had the time to really come to terms with it I arrived back at the building.
The sled slowed to a stop, gently pumping against another sled parked on the track. I sat there for a few moments, gasping in great big gulping fear breaths, trying to assure myself the ride didn’t have one last trick of its sleeve.
I looked around. The place was empty, deserted. The overhead lights were still on and the old Pepsi machine still glowed and buzzed, but the ticket booth was dark and empty, a metal gate pulled down over the ticket window.
Suddenly it hit me that I was free and I practically leapt out of the sled and onto the platform. I immediately collapsed. My legs were jelly and my head was spinning. I tried to stand up again and doubled over, dry heaving. Have you ever been out on a boat for a day and have that weird reverse motion sickness when you’re back on solid land? It was like that times a hundred. My inner ear was literally pounding, all the motion had really done a number on it.
I laid there for a few moments and eventually forced myself to stand up on my two wobbling legs. I looked around, a horrible certainty creeping into my mind that there would be no exit, no way off the platform but to my relief an exit turnstyle, one of those full height ones, was set into the fence that surrounded the ride property.
I went through it and found myself back on the main road. The truckstop was still there, still open but far less busy. My car sat in the same corner of the parking lot I had left it.
I allowed myself one look back, just one quick one. The metal skeleton of the Alpine Slide track sat there, dark and quiet but otherwise normal.
I stumbled-ran back to my car, dug the keys out of my pocket, and collapsed inside. When the door shut I let out a primal scream, the tons of fear and confusion and anger all fusing into a single, raw emotion. I screamed again and again.
After a few moments I felt like I was emotionally at least back to a place where I could act, although I wasn’t sure yet what to do next. Not really knowing what to do I cranked the car. The A/C had been on low when I shut off the car and it came roaring back to life and cold air blowing on me almost sent me back into a full on panic attack. I fumbled with the climate controls until the air stopped blowing directly on me, then calmed down enough to turn the heat on, helping to get the chill out of my bones. There was a half full bottle of water in the center console cup holder and I grabbed it and chugged it. Nothing ever tasted as good before or sense as that few ounces of water.
That was when I noticed the clock on the radio head unit. It was 4:17 in the morning. It had been about one, one thirty or so in the afternoon when I got on the accursed ride.
Over 15 hours. I had been on the goddamn ride for over 15 hours. Over half a day.
I just sat there. Warming up. Calming down. I was exhausted. I was dehydrated. I can’t even describe how my head felt. I probably had at least a minor case of hypothermia. I thought about going into the gas station and asking for help but what would I even say, and more than anything I just wanted to get away from this place. And I just wanted to get away. I wanted to be nowhere near that damn ride.
I put the Camaro in gear and pulled into the street and in panic I immediately slammed on the brakes. I was lucky there was no traffic on the road at that moment. The feeling of accelerating to just normal surface street speeds made me sick to my stomach. I gathered myself and very slowly accelerated the car I usually treated with a very heavy foot up to 30 miles an hour. Every time I tried to accelerate at a pace faster than “Old Lady Going to Church, Uphill” I would have a panic attack. I was okay once I was up to speed, but accelerating freaked me out after being on that ride.
I drove about 30 minutes, putting some arbitrary amount of distance between myself and the coaster. Eventually I made it back to where the twisty mountain road met back up with a major road that would eventually meet back up with the highway. After a few more minutes of driving I saw the onramp for the highway. There was one of those big truckstop travel plazas and pulled in, parking right up at the door. I smelled like pee and I can only imagine how I looked, but I didn’t care.
I kept a couple of emergency 20s in the back of my wallet and spent it on the biggest bottle of water the store had, an overpriced bottle of eye drops, and a huge travel mug of coffee. The clerk looked at me as if he was expecting me to either drop dead or rob him the entire time.
Back in my car I downed the coffee. I put a few eye drops in each of my eyes and sat there as the caffeine took effect until I felt like I could make it back to my apartment. The sun was just coming up when I finally pulled out of the truck stop and got on the freeway. I slowly, very slowly, accelerated up to highway speed, put the Camaro in cruise control, and let the miles start to drift away. I turned on the radio, I needed to hear human voices. Every time my mind went back to what had just happened I turned the radio up louder, eventually drowning it out with painful levels of rock music. I wasn’t ready to think about it yet. Yes looking back I know I was just in denial. I finally made it back to the crappy little apartment I had off campus, a little two story walk up studio. I let myself in and collapsed on the cheap couch. I was asleep before I even had the time to decide whether or not to do anything else. I woke up later that afternoon. I took a shower and ate a meal and didn’t think about the ride. I washed the pee stained filthy clothes I had been wearing and didn’t think about the ride. I went back to class and didn’t think about the ride. Every time I thought about the ride I forced it out of my head. I’m sure this wasn’t the most mentally healthy thing to do but what can you say?
I didn’t forget about it, don’t be silly. This isn’t the kind of thing you forget. One day while looking up something else in the university’s library my curiosity got the better of me and I looked up the Alpine Slide. No website but a few Google Map and Yelp mentions. None of them mentioned anything weird, certainly nothing even remotely like what I experienced. Near as I can tell it closed sometimes in the winter of 2012.
Life went on. I mean, that’s what it does. The next day was a little better. And the day after that a little better. And the day after that a little better still. I met a nice girl. Graduated. Got married. Got a nice house in the suburbs. Got a dog. Had a daughter. Spent a lot of time happy and not thinking about being trapped on an endless alpine coaster.And that was my life for many, many years after that.
Until a few weeks back when as a very different person I found myself driving a boring and safe mid sized family SUV through those same mountains. My wife Carol, 5 months pregnant, sat in the passenger seat, our 6 year old daughter Emily in a booster seat in the back, and Max our mixed breed mutt next to her. It had been a nice pleasant trip, driving back from visiting her folks.
I hadn’t thought about that fucking ride in so long I barely registered that I was in the same general area until it was too late. Suddenly I realized that little mountain tourist trap town was only a few minutes down the road. I swallowed hard and gripped the steering wheel hard. Carol was looking out the window at the scenery and Emily was deep into some kid’s Youtube video on an iPad. I forced myself to keep my breath steady as we rounded the corner.The town was still there, sorta. Time had not been kind to it. The gas station was still there, at some point it had been bought out by Shell. The tourist trap shops were still there. One of them was now a vape shop. The diner was closed, the building looking like it sat unused for a long time.
But of course that’s not what I cared about. A looked over at the site where the Alpine Coaster once stood. It was gone. The kitschy fake barn was gone. The site was just a bare concrete slab with a chainlink fence around it. Faded “no trespassing” and “for sale” signs hung off the fence. A pile of old, decaying lumber that might have once long ago been part of the structure covered part of the old lot. No sign of the track remained outside of some old concrete support posts dotting the side of the mountain.
I exhaled out a breath I hadn’t even realized I had been holding in. Soon the little town disappeared in my rear view mirror.
About a half hour later we stopped for gas. I pulled up to a gas pump across from a massive motorhome. Max stuck his head out the window and started barking at a little white dog, a toy breed of some kind, in the window of the motorhome. Carol and Emily immediately headed into the store to restock on snacks while I fueled up.
I stood there, a half smile on my lips as Max barked and wagged his tail in an attempt to attract the attention of the other dog while I filled up the tank, said dog doing an admirable job of ignoring him.
Right about the time I finished fueling up and cleaning the bugs off the windshield Carol returned from inside the store, Emily in tow, arms filled with two full sized bags of Salt and Vinegar Potato Chips and what looked to be a half dozen individually wrapped pickles.
I raised an eyebrow at the collection of food but knew better than to question a pregnant woman's snack choices.
“Should we take Max for a quick walk?” Carol asked. The travel plaza had a nice little gated dog walking area off to the side.
“Yeah probably not a bad idea, he’s been cooped up in the car for a few hours.” I said. Max, upon hearing his name and the word “walk” , forgot about the other dog and upgraded from wagging his tail to wagging his entire body while making whining sounds and staring right at me.
About this time I became half aware that the big motor home next to us was pulling away. I didn’t think much of it, outside of doing a quick automatic mental check to make sure Emily was well clear of the moving vehicle, but she was safely between me and our SUV, well out of the way.
But that was when Emily looked behind me and cheerfully yelled “Daddy look a roller coaster! Can I ride the coaster?”
It’s cliche as fuck I know but my blood went cold.
I turned around slowly, certain in my knowledge that terrible old decrepit Alpine Coaster would be there, having just popped into existence to trap me again.
That.. is not what I saw. Sure enough there was a coaster there, one I hadn’t noticed earlier because it had mostly been blocked by the motor home, but there it was. It was even an Alpine Coaster.
But it was not the same coaster I had encountered those years ago. That was immediately obvious. It was a small but modern and newish looking setup with neon lights and a bunch of people. There was an actual building where you bought tickets and a little snack stand.
“Daddy! Can we go on the coaster!” Emily asked again.
My mouth made motions but no words came out. I glanced over at Carol, hoping she’d say we didn’t have time but to my horror she smiled and said “You know what? That does sound like fun. Daddy will take you while I take Max for a walk.”
My mind raced, trying to think of a way to get out of it. But Emily was already dragging me across the parking lot to the entrance.
I patted my pocket, making sure my phone was in it. Every fiber of my being was screaming to run away. I slept walked through the line and the ticket booth while Emily bounced happily.
We got into a two seat plastic sled. This one was actually a lot nicer than the one my mind wouldn’t stop thinking about. It had two nice cushioned seats, big grab handles, even a nice rollbar.
The sled started up the track. I fought back the panic. I swerved my head around, keeping the building in my view. I was terrified of losing sight of it. We made it to the top and Emily did a happy squeal as we started down the side of the mountain.
My heart raced. Any second, any second my mind told me we’d lose sight of the building and then the ride would never end. The ride sped down the mountain. My mind tortured me with thoughts of not only going through it again, but seeing Emily go through it. The ride went around a big, banking turn. Emily kept shouting happily. How long before Carol reported us missing I wondered? Could I keep Emily calm? What if it lasted even longer this time? What if this time it never ended?
And then we were back at the start of the ride. The same attendant who had helped us into the sled was helping Emily out. I stepped out. The attendant gave me a brief look but said nothing. I guess I looked a little wild eyed.
I was fine. Emily was fine. It had been a perfectly normal, fun ride.
“That was fun Daddy! Thank you!” Emily said. I forced a smile back. “It was fun.” I responded, hoping like I sounded like I meant it.
I took Emily’s hand and we walked back to the car. Max saw us coming and barked happily. Carol looked up from the pint of Ben and Jerry’s she had somehow acquired and added to her snack collection while we were gone and smiled at us.
“Did you have fun?” she asked.
“It was so fun Mommy!” Emily said.
Carol smiled down at her, but then looked at me and frowned. “Are you okay?” Carol could read my face a lot better than the attendant could. “You’re pale.”
I smiled and this time the smile felt real. “Ya know what. Yeah, I think I am okay.”
Carol looked a little puzzled, but didn’t press it. We loaded Emily back in her booster seat, stopped Max from trying desperately to eat half a discarded gas station hot dog off the ground and got him back in the car. Carol and her small collection of snack food took her place in the passenger seat and I got in the driver's seat.I smiled. I cranked the car. I put it in gear. I pulled out of the gas station and back on the road, this time accelerating just a little faster than I had in years.

Why shouldn’t you trust trees? They seem shady, but you can trust me!
I am a college graduate and work full-time, so at times, my responses may be slow. I will always try to respond as quickly as possible. My job does require long hours but one of my current goals is to achieve a better work-life balance. I usually watch a movie/show/YouTube video every night and if we hit it off after chatting for a bit (Chats preferred over Messages), watching something together sounds really fun. I don't have many forms of social media, so to move the conversation away from Reddit my only other options are WhatsApp and Telegram, or we could just text like the good ole’ days. P.S. I don’t use Snapchat and will not download it.
My hobbies include:

• Sleeping, seriously, I greatly enjoy a good night's sleep. I hope my username checks out :) I try to average about 6-8 hours every night during the work week but I am not always successful. Fun fact, I can basically fall asleep on command.
• I enjoy mostly pop, country, and rock music. If I had to have one favorite band, it would probably be Linkin Park. I usually have music or a movie/show playing throughout the day so it is not too quiet. I enjoy having background noise.
• I enjoy watching tv shows and movies in my free time (I usually try to find something to watch every night to wind down)
  • As far as tv shows go, I usually enjoy drama or romance-related shows. I am currently on the hunt for a new tv show to watch, but unfortunately, nothing has really caught my attention.
  • As for movies, I enjoy horror and romance movies. My favorite is the Conjuring series.
• I enjoy baking and cooking new recipes. I don't have a favorite food or dish to cook but rather it depends on what I am craving at that exact moment. I’m not a picky eater and a firm believer in trying everything at least once.
• Lastly, I also read about a book a week, mostly romance books. Oftentimes, I will read for a bit before bed or when I have a few minutes of downtime.
• Most importantly, I don’t drink or use any drugs and would prefer a night in over a night out.

Now, this part splits into two, the infamous what I am looking for (DISCLAIMER: I believe that relationships start from a great friendship):
Friendship:
I am looking for someone older (preferably between 30-40) as I tend to be able to communicate more effectively with those who are older. I reside in the U.S. and would like to chat with others in the U.S. as well to not have to work around too many different time zones. I would like to have a conversation flowing throughout the day as opposed to one message a day. Also, wouldn't it be great to be able to send and receive funny TikToks throughout the day? (Extra Bonus Points for iPhone users. iMessage and FaceTime are both fantastic) Someone with similar core values as myself. I value honesty and would much rather have a brutally blunt answer than sugarcoat something. I don't believe in lying even if it is just what most consider "a little white lie". I am an extremely motivated and goal-oriented person and would hope that my friends are passionate about whatever it is that they want to pursue. With that being said, to put it bluntly, I am not looking for someone who plays video games and watches anime for hours on end.
Relationship (take everything above + some extra fluff):

• Deal Breakers:
  • Kids (so no single parents please)
  • Open Relationships/Polygamy
  • Tattoos or Piercings
  • Substance Addictions

If you are interested, please send me an introduction about yourself as opposed to “hey” or “hi”. I will not respond to a lacking introduction. A great conversation is a two-way street.
Note 1: Due to the number of creeps on here, please send a picture of yourself, fully clothed, I may add, so I can ensure you’re not an 80-year-old man looking for some adult time. I will also send one in return.
Note 2: Some unpopular Reddit opinions; I am not into video games or anime (old-school Nintendo games and board games can be fun though). Politically, I lean right. I do not believe a person’s political views should be a deal-breaker in friendship but then again, this is Reddit.

I stay in a tiny little town in Indiana with not much to do, so here I am trying to meet people online. I work in Marketing and enjoy traveling, hiking, kickboxing, photography, theater, cooking, etc.. Music wise I am mainly into rock and metal, but listen to a wide variety of genres depending on my mood. Dance Gavin Dance, Evanescence, Djo, Breaking Benjamin, Killswitch Engage, Flyleaf, Slipknot etc are bands I commonly listen to. I used to play video games but haven't switched on my PS5 in months. Currently just getting amused at all the Yasuke drama with Assassin's Creed: Shadows lol. I recently started baking, so that's a new skill I am working on.
I have visited 4/50 states so far. I am originally from India but I moved to the US two years ago. I do have some bucket list travel items I want to check off in the US - I want to visit Yosemite, Grand Tetons and Denali. I want to go to Mt. Rushmore and click goofy pictures. I want to drive through the scenic roads of Wyoming. I want to rent a cabin in the woods of the PNW for a week. I want to experience the Fall colors in West Virginia. I have a bunch of things I want to do and I would love to hear if you have any similar aspirations.
I am mainly looking for someone to talk to regularly because life can get awfully boring where I am at. It'll be an added bonus if you're in-state or closeby. But if not, that's fine too.
If anything I've written has been interesting to you, reach out with a thoughtful message introducing yourself and let's talk!

About me:
I am a 20 year old 5’ 6” asian guy who is kind of slim but working to put on some more muscle. I guess my family would say I am handsome, but they’re required to say that so maybe you should check the picture in my profile to find out for yourself. I would say I’m a kind, caring person who just likes to enjoy the simple things in life and spending time with people who I care about. My main love language is words of affirmation and quality time probably since I didn’t get too much growing up.
Some interests/hobbies of mine are gaming, going for walks, exercising/playing sports, and watching tv shows or anime. Some of the games I like are league of legends, teamfight tactics, valorant, Minecraft, overwatch, super smash bros, animal crossing, and Pokémon.
Personality wise I would say I’m quite shy and introverted, but warm up over time. I’m more of a homebody but I still like to go out sometimes, just not to parties or that sort of thing. I am also not the best at conversations. I feel like I try so hard to keep the conversation moving, but it doesn’t always happen, so if we chat I will request your patience. I have been in one relationship, but it was all online and when I was younger. I have not been physical with anyone and haven’t even had a first kiss yet. Because of this, I might not know how or what to do, so I hope you can show me or have patience and we can find out together :).
About you:
I hope you’re a kind, caring 18-23 year old person. I’d like to be somewhat attracted to you. I hope you stay in shape and also focus on your health since that is important to me. I guess your hobbies and interests don’t matter too much since we don’t need to do everything together, but some similar ones would give us something to talk about or do if we stay online for a while. And I know I am a bit shorter than average and it’s not usually everyone’s cup of tea (hopefully you can prove me wrong), but I don’t mind if you’re taller or shorter than me.
Anyways, thanks a lot for reading all this. If you send me a message you don’t have to tell me as much as this says, but a small introduction and a picture would be nice.

Hey everyone going to try to make this as nice as i can to sort thru. I have a few knives to sell to lighten the collection. Conus and paypal G&S only due to rules. If you want more then one knife I can definitely do a bundle price at a better price. Thanks for looking!
Timestamp: https://imgur.com/a/3QBlgzK
Null knives raikou #292 Pics: https://imgur.com/a/MC9sSHh First up is one i really dont want to get rid of but cant bring myself to take it out of the box and carry it. It has been played with a little but is bnib besides that. No cut or carry at all. Will come with everything it came with from null. SV:325
Maxace mamba/ sld magic Pics: https://imgur.com/a/Rap4z12 This knife has been carried and used has some marks on blade and titanium bolster, tried my best to get pics. This knife has insane drop shut action super smooth deployment just ended up being alittle big for my personal preference. Will come with new edge via kme. Will come in random pouch SV: 70
Civivi qubit/s35vn Pics: https://imgur.com/a/6PA1wLi This is the blade hq exclusive in s35vn. Like new. Has been carried once and cut paper. Super slicey blade and great action. Will come in civivi pouch SV: 70
Vosteed racoon top liner lock/14c28n Pics: https://imgur.com/a/KXxBbCP This knife has been used and shows some light marks on blade tried to get pics best I could. Has great action and lock works great with completely free movement when lock is disengaged. Just wasnt for me on have had for a few week. Carried a handful of times to work. Will come with fresh edge and in vosteed pouch. SV: 55
Divo knives pony stout/14c28n Pics: https://imgur.com/a/jVmSLk6 This is a recent catch and release from swap just alittle small for me. Has drop shut action and looks to be in great condition. Edge is sharp and will come in divo box. SV: 50
Civivi exarch/d2 Pics: https://imgur.com/a/iPiT2ZB Last up is a civivi exarch user. Great front flipping action would definitely recommend as a first front flipper i perfer this over the much loved feist. Has some stains on the d2 blade see pictures. Will come with a fresh edge and in a pouch. SV: 25 by itself or 15 as an add on.
Feel free to ask me any questions about them or for any specific pics I might have missed. Thanks for looking!

I can't for the life of me remember what this tune is from. The only thing I can correlate it with is like older cartoons of someone tiptoeing to it like a detective looking for something. It's "dun dun dun dun DUUUUUUUUUUUN da da dun dun dun dun dun (x2) It's nothing on the radio or ever been on the radio.I would call it more like orchestra background music
Here's me playing it on the piano
Download The Piano and create your own realistic-sounding tunes.
https://apple.co/2RdxWN4

I can't for the life of me remember what this tune is from. The only thing I can correlate it with is like older cartoons of someone tiptoeing to it like a detective looking for something. It's "dun dun dun dun DUUUUUUUUUUUN da da dun dun dun dun dun (x2) It's nothing on the radio or ever been on the radio.I would call it more like orchestra background music
Here's me playing it on the piano
Download The Piano and create your own realistic-sounding tunes.
https://apple.co/2RdxWN4

Here is a spreadsheet of the cars with pictures, prices, 0-60 times. Prices are hard to pin down as it varies so much from dealer and location.
Destiny's car requirement (from his stream) Faster then his RS (0-60 in 4.5 1/4 13.5) Handles better then his RS, Less then 400k. (As a broke bitch, I only really look at "cheaper" options. I don't follow super expensive cars.) He also would like a manual transmission, and would like something unique.
Name, 0-60, Cost

1. Mazda Miata, 5.7, 35,000+
2. Chevrolet E-ray, 2.5, 120,000+
3. Chevrolet Corvette Stingray, 2.8, 90,000+
4. Cadillac CT5-V Blackwing, 3.4, 105,000+
5. Cadillac Escalade-V, 3.9, 150,000+
6. Chevrolet Camaro ZL1 1LE, 3.4, 63,000+
7. GR Supra 45th Anniversary Edition, 3.9, 63,000+
8. Nissan Z Nismo, 4.3, 68,000+
9. Jaguar F-Type, 3.5, 80,000+
10. Lotus Emira, 4.3, 105,000+
11. Lexus LC500, 4.4, 100,000+
12. Audi RS Q8, 3.7, 120,000+
13. Tesla S Plaid, 1.9*, 82,000+

Car choices is ultimately up to the person's taste of styling and how they feel behind the wheel. Personally, a Cadillac CT5 or Escalade + a Miata(or E-ray if you feel like ballin') would be the play. Having a larger vehicle to move people and equipment, and having a amazing ride quality for longer trips is a big plus. Then when you are feeling like just driving, and or are going solo, a Miata or some other 2 door sports car would scratch that sporty driving ich.
This is assuming you are buying new, and not used.

Hello, I hope everyone's having a nice day! Anyways im feeling a little bored and pretty lonely, so I figured I'd try and meet some new people. So Iv usually been the quiet shy type, the one that tends to sit in the back of class and hope i don't get noticed. People tend to judge you before they get to actually know you, so its always been kinda hard meeting new people for me. I am trying to work on being less introverted and more social, plus lately iv been feeling kinda lonely so I would like to find a chat buddy. Short-term chat is fine but preferably id like a long term friend. I would like someone that wants to talk about both serious topics and silly topics. Also if you have anything on your mind and need to vent i dont mind listening.
So a bit about me im about 5'10 with brown eyes and long dark brown hair. I have 2 cats with plenty of pictures! Im a pretty big geek, I love comic books some of my favorites would be The walking dead, Spawn, Invincible, Batman, HellblazeConstantine, Spiderman, Old man logan to name a few. I also enjoy reading books like The expanse, ready player one, Lord of the rings. I am currently reading The witcher series. i also enjoy hiking, sleeping, going to the movies,mall,bars, concerts.
I Also enjoy video games and I usually just play on my xbox. Some of my favorites would be Red dead redemption 1&2, Fallout New Vegas&4, Assassins creed 2 and origins, Pubg, skyrim, Bioshock, mass effect, i have plenty of more
If you would like to know my music tastes i am very much a punk,metal, classic rock type of guy but that doesn't mean I won't listen to other stuff. If you enjoy bands like Greenday, The adicts, The misfits, Ramones, Weezer, Foo fighters will get along.
For Movies and Tv i like scifi fantasy but ill watch anything. Some of my likes would be , a good amount of marvel and dc shows and movies.
As for who im looking for age, ethnicity,location dont matter just be fun and nice! Of course it would be great to find someone with common interests but its not a deal breaker im willing and want to learn about new hobbies. So if you think we might make great friends lets chat, we can chat on reddit or whatever app you might use.

Hi I’m a 29 year old female. When I was 13, I fell pregnant. This wasn’t a consensual relationship, I was a virgin who didn’t really even know how babies were made, i still played with barbies, I was raped by my friends 23 year old brother during a sleepover.
I didn’t tell anybody. I didn’t know I was pregnant, Id only started my periods a few months prior so there absence didn’t concern me and like I said, I didn’t really know how babies were made beyond the basics. I found out I was pregnant at 29 weeks when I went to ER with my parents for stomach pain.
My parents were very angry at me despite the circumstances. He was convicted and imprisoned. They tried to find a doctor who’d give me an abortion but none would due to gestation. They said I had to give the baby up and I went along with it, I had no support from them and I grew up having a very cold relationship with them. When my daughter was born I was inconsolable and didn’t want to give her up. I refused to and my daughter was forcefully taken from me at the hospital. After which I was hysterical and had to be sedated. I made attempts on my life in the months after that. I was then put in to boarding school, where I stayed until I was 18.
It wasn’t an open adoption, I was allowed to leave a letter with her and I also left her my necklace which was my prized possession at the time. The adoptive mother stated she wanted no contact which I was devastated about but the social worker told me I could have contact when she turned 18. After I turned 18 and left boarding school, I moved in with my Nan whilst attending university. My Nan gave me so much love and care and was very disappointed in my parents (my Nan had no knowledge of me even being pregnant)
When I was 21 I graduated and I also got pregnant, that relationship didn’t work out but I’ve since married and had 3 more children. But I’ve never stopped thinking about my first born. I gave birth to her on my 14th birthday so we share a birthday and every birthday I feel like I’m grieving. I go through periods of just crying and staying in bed feeling guilty at what I’d done. I still feel so guilty and I can’t cope with guilt.
Anyway, my daughter who is now 15 found me on Facebook 2 weeks ago (I have a distinct name and I still use my maiden name on there) she messaged me an angry message and then blocked me so I couldn’t even respond.
She messaged me saying that she hates me and I’m dead to her, she told me how much she loves her adoptive mother and as far as she’s concerned I don’t exist. She says I’ve turned her in to a “messed up person” She told me how she thought I was a disgusting person for giving her up for adoption because I wanted to “enjoy life without the burden of a child” her words. She called me a slut (among other words) and questioned why I was having sex at 13. She said that she hoped my other children die and called them racist terms (they are mixed) because she is angry that I kept them and not her and that she felt that meant I wasn’t good enough. She then went on to say her adoptive mother told her that
1: My parents (her bio grandparents) wanted her but I refused to look after her and wanted her to be adopted.
2: I wanted an abortion and told adoptive mother that I wished I could have had an abortion
3: That adoptive mother had reached out to me when I was 21 and pregnant with her first sibling to ask if I wanted contact, and I (according to her birth mum) said I didn’t care about her and wanted to forget the whole thing and asked her not to contact me again.
4: That I was sleeping around with a lot of men my age and didn’t know her bio dad as I’d been with so many male school friends which is why I got sent to boarding school because I was “out of control”
All the above are just outright lies. I am glad she doesn’t know the circumstances of her conception, I’d be happy if bio mum had told her for example that her father was a childhood boyfriend of mine because the truth is something she shouldn’t know until she’s older, but to suggest I was sleeping around with multiple men at the age of 13 and didn’t know who he was is disgusting when it’s not true.
Im not able to contact her back because she’s blocked me. I’ve looked at her profile from my husbands account, I’ve seen her bio mums Facebook profile but I don’t intend to contact either of them as much as I want to because I guess I will just tell her everything when she’s 18 if she wants to hear it because perhaps now is not the appropriate age.
Her mums Facebook shows that she is her only child, that she’s now divorced (her and her husband adopted my daughter so she’s since divorced him) they seem very close and have lots of pictures together.
Her Facebook is concerning and it’s public so I could see everything. She posts quotes about depression and anxiety, has scars on her wrists which I fear may be SH scars) writes status’ such as “no body cares about me I may as well just die” constantly posts pictures laying in a hospital bed.
I have since informed social services about what I’ve seen on Facebook and they’ve just told me that they can not discuss this with me due to confidentiality as she’s legally not my child but have said they can assure me that they are doing everything necessary to ensure she is ok.
I don’t really know what to do. She has a false impression of me told by her adoptive mother. None of which is true, she was so wanted and I’ve never got over it. I now fear that her thinking I rejected her and didn’t want her and she wasn’t good enough has led to some serious mental health issues and potentially these will only get worse or she could harm herself very badly based on lots of lies.
I want her to know I love her, I want her to know I wanted her but I was forced to give her up, I want her to know that I still love her and always will and that I’d do anything for her. I want to tell her I was never contacted by adoptive mother and had I have been I would have jumped at the opportunity to even just talk to my daughter. I want to tell her that I do know her bio father and I wasn’t sleeping with multiple men (although the truth regarding the rape shouldn’t be disclosed right now) I just want her to know all of this, but I’m powerless until she is 18. I have been told if I message her from a different account since I’m blocked I could face legal charges.
I am so scared of her hurting herself based on lies. Her adoptive mum whilst I believe does love her, has poisoned my daughter against me in an attempt to get my daughter to hate me because she doesn’t want daughter potentially coming back to me or forming a relationship with me and her getting pushed out, so she’s said all of this to make that impossible so she will be her only mother.
But that’s to the detriment of my daughter, my daughter clearly has mental health issues and whilst they could be from other things I know that feeling unloved, unwanted and having being told this information that is outright lies must be weighing heavily on her and making her feel inadequate. I can’t imagine if I was adopted and I heard things like that about my bio mum, it would devastate me and I would hate myself.
I don’t know what I’m hoping to gain from this post just looking for advice. I can contact her in 3 years. But I’m scared in those 3 years something bad could happen with the way her mental health is, and that something bad may happen without her knowing the truth about how much I love her.
I’ve been off sick from work since, I have been an emotional wreck. I just hope she’s okay even if she does hate me. Of course I’d love to tell her the truth but more than anything I want her to know the truth for the sake of her own mental well-being even if that means she still doesn’t want to speak to me. Social services just keep telling me that they can’t discuss anything with her about me beyond the basics of the fact that she’s adopted. The rest is down to adoptive mother to disclose if she wishes. When she is 18 she will get access to her file and know the true circumstances but until then, everything she knows is based on lies.

For context, my bf (22M) had broken up with his ex (21F) a year before he met me because she was going abroad for uni. They decided to stay friends but she eventually blocked him when she left.
Me (20F) and my bf met two months before I went abroad for uni (another country than his ex lol). I told him this immediately and we agreed to get into a relationship to eventually break up in two months.
It was a great relationship, he was a loving partner and he always spoiled me with affection.
We broke up the day before I left and decided to stay friends.
During our break we both dated other people but when I came back to visit my home country for christmas we decided to get back together. We told each other about everyone that we dated while we were on our break.
He then told me that him and his ex had met, without him telling me about it, while we were still together (about a week before we broke up) because she told him that she was in a bad situation. She had just gotten out of a toxic relationship and had nobody to talk to except him. She told him that her toxic ex made her block him. He consoled her but when she said that she missed him and had feelings for him, he told her that he had no feelings for her, that he had a girlfriend and showed her my picture.
At the time I didn’t think much of it and honestly felt sorry for her.
We agreed to do a long distance relationship and I eventually left for my second semester. One day I got curious and searched my bf’s ex on instagram. I saw that he had liked all of her posts that were posted while we were on our break and he was still following her. I had this gut feeling that there was something going on.
When I came back to my home country for summer break, my bf greeted me with flowers as always. One day while we were hanging out I playfully asked if I could check his phone. He said no, which is fine but I found this odd as he never hid his phone around me and I was under the impression that he was already telling me everything that was going on in his life. When I told him this he said okay and showed me his text histories on all of his social media.
We came across his dms with his ex, though I didn’t look through what they talked about. I asked him why he was still in contact with his ex after she told him that she still had feelings for him. He said that they were just friends and that they hadn’t even talked that much. She asked if he wanted help with learning english and occasionally said let’s meet up. He once told her that she looked better after the bad state she was in. That was it.
I told him that I was uncomfortable with him talking to her still when he knew that she had feelings for him. He said okay, apologized and unfollowed her in front of me.
Something still didn’t feel right.
The next day I asked to meet him and asked him why he didn’t tell me that he met up with his ex while we were still together. He told me that he was afraid that I would misunderstand it at the time given that our relationship wasn’t that serious since we would break up in a week. I asked him if he had told her that we broke up when we did. He told me that he didn’t remember. I asked to see their messages. He said no. I told him that I had a bad feeling and couldn’t go on with our relationship if I didn’t see their texts.
He then showed me. He had replied to her story saying that she had gained weight and that her cheeks looked cute. Then there was a conversation where he asked when she was coming back and asked if she wanted to meet up. Another one where they talked about her toxic ex. And that’s all I saw until he snatched his phone from my hand. I immediately got up, started crying and told him I was breaking up with him.
He said they were just friends and that that’s how he speaks to all his friends. He said that she was in a bad state and had nobody to talk to (which was straight bs btw). He said that I wasn’t even with him when they talked (which was true but apparently they texted on whatsapp as well but he deleted the texts because his conservative dad looked at them and got mad, so I’m not sure) and that they hadn’t talked since.
The next day I blocked, then unblocked him on instagram. And he had followed his ex again. I waited and checked, and he had unfollowed her again.
He texted me that day saying that he didn’t do anything wrong and that he just wanted to be there for his friend. He said that he was torn that we were breaking up and that he will never forget me. I asked him why he followed his ex immediately after I broke up with him then. He said that it was because she was his friend but he then decided to unfollow her when he reconsidered the situation because it didn’t feel right. He also removed all of his likes from her posts.
We texted for two days. He eventually apologized for breaking my trust and that even though she was his friend it was disrespectful to me. He told me that I was the most precious thing in his life and he was an idiot for losing me. I told him that I still didn’t forgive him and that I needed time. He said that he would respect my decision no matter what
Any advice? I love him so much but I feel like I can’t trust him anymore.
TLDR My bf met with his ex while still with me, then stayed in contact with her while we were broken up only to tell me this when we decided to get back together. I then found out that he was talking in a flirtatious during the break and tried to meet up with her. He apologized but idk what to do, any advice?

So i have a real video clip of someone and i want to essentially lock a cartoon vector iimage of a cartoon head so that when the video plays, and the person moves the cartoon head is locked and moves with the video.

I thought she could change, but that doesn't seem to be the case. She's acting sneaky again.
And this time I don't care to play detective. I could have opened her chat app she left open on her computer last night, yet I didn't. I don't care to look for proof, because I don't need it.
You know the saying: Where there's smoke, there's fire. There's smoke and there may or may not be fire, but the fact remains - there's smoke when there shouldn't be smoke.
I remained with her despite her not leaving that job. Despite her seeing that co-worker every day, I remained. I gave it a shot knowing that the job market is tough, and didn't require her to leave it even after everything that she did with that guy.
So what's my plan now? It's to emotionally detach. I don't do break ups well. They affect me a little too much. So this time I'll prepare for the pain; I'll ease into it before stripping the band-aid off. She can do as she likes and I won't investigate. I won't even ask. Her deception will only cement my emotional detachment - it will only cement the idea that my decision is the correct one.
I love her, but it's clearly not mutual. She could have left that job for another one. At the minimum, she could have followed my few requirements as she continued working there, while not acting dodgy and sneaky.
I moved countries to be with her. I left my family behind. And gave up on my business prospects. I don't regret it; it was worth a shot - love is always worth a shot. But it doesn't appear to be mutual. Leaving a job to find another one in your country, in your town, should be easy. Yet she has barely tried.
There's no point in further communicating with her. She denies all of this, and claims she loves me. But actions speak so much louder than words. She seems to want two men groveling over her at once, but I'm not into threesomes. She can have this other guy she likely idealized in her head, and experience the reality of things without me in the picture. I welcome it.
How does one detach emotionally while living together and sleeping in the same bed? I'm not completely sure. But I know journaling will help, and that's where I'll start. Her birthday is coming up and I'll celebrate it with her, give her gifts, etc. So that will be difficult. I still love her, but I can love her in another way - maybe in a paternal way, not a lovers way.

Hey all hope you're having a great day :)
So like most people i'm missing that special person in my life and it would be really nice to find someone that i can relate to, be 100% honest and open with and generally find my best friend,
Hopefully this would start out as friendship and if we click then we click, open to anyone from anywhere :)
Some stuff about me/hobbies
Video games, this is my biggest hobby by far, i play have an pretty big library of games i play so if you game, there is a high chance we would share stuff we could play, a few games i play often, League(i question it too don't worry) soulsbourne games (unga bunga builds) fallout's, i mainly play pc but have a switch and ps4 too.
TV/Film, if not doing the above, you can find me binge watching shows or films, such as B99, the office HIMYM, GoT (we can discuss how shit the last season was forever), Star Wars, Marvel stuff, SAW.
Animals, i have 2 dogs (yes i'll show you lots of pictures) and in general i love animals so much, so i'll probably spam you with pictures of random animals i think are cute or funny :)
Music, i listen to a wide variety of stuff, from rock and metal to dance/pop some electro swing, rap and other stuff, in general if i like a song i'll listen to it on repeat till i hate it but still listen to it anyway.
I try and be witty and funny most the time, I have a stupid sense of humour but will try and make you laugh most of the time, I can be shy to start with but i open up pretty quickly when i get comfortable with you :)
Don't be shy and hit me up if you think we would get on :)

Me F(22) and my ex husband (23) were married when we were married at (19) and (20). We got married so young. He was in the military and he was during basic training. I believe that we had the best relationship before the army. We were both heavily in love with each other. But then the army happened and got married. My parents never really liked the ideas of getting married and we did it anyways without them knowing. It created a hard time for us. He was stationed in the Texas. Hundreds of miles away from where we lived. We did long distance until I got out of our lease and moved with him. I was constantly told by my parents that he is using me for the bah money, or not to feel lonely. I never did I feel that way until we got divorced but I don’t know what to feel about that anymore. I’ll explain more after I add more information to our story. He got into a car accident and the car totaled so he need a new car. Which added to debts and with the debts came the problems. We had so many debts and the army pressure never helped us. I worked for a few months but i quit my job cause it wasn’t good for my mental health. I can attribute some of the blame. I could have continued to work and paid off our debts but i couldn’t. I went into a heavy depression state that I didn’t realize I was in. I did do things around the house like cook dinner (not all the time cause I didn’t have any motivation to do it so we order DoorDash), I used to do laundry in the bathtub because he was so busy and tired to go to laundry may, I constantly picked up and cleaned the house. I could have done more. I know I’m partially to blame for a lot of things. I had trust issues but those added to our problems. One day I was gone for a month, I went to spend time at a youth group trip with his mom and then I went to see my parents after that. When I got to Texas his best friend told me that he was trying to sleep with another woman while I was gone. Which killed me. I asked him when he got home and he told me that he was trying to but he didn’t do anything with her and was trying to seem like it cause his friend was pushing it on him. I forgave him and push past it. I fucked up too. I did something that i regretted and still regret till this day. I loved him and I still do. I don’t think I will ever stop loving him. We were had our fights like always. It was always about money and how I wasn’t valuing him and he wasn’t valuing me. I think the only time that we didn’t fight was the last month we had before he deployed. We were so happy. We spent our time together watching movies, playing card games, playing video games, just being the same kids we were before we got married. I miss those days sometimes. I wish I could turn back time and do things differently. Now the hard part. The divorce. I never wanted to be divorced. He was/still is my person. The person who understands you to the core. The person that you can be yourself without shame or guilt. The person that your heart beats from no matter how much it hurts when they break it or damage it. The person that you picked in a room filled with people who you have loved in the past/future. He is that person. My ex deployed and was gone for six months. Three months into the deployment he stopped calling me, he stopped snapping me, he stopped talking to me. It felt like he shut down on me. I begged him to call me or anything. We went through a dark phase. Then he got back to the states and we were good for a while. He came to visit his mom for Christmas through new years. Our anniversary was the 30th of December. His mother lives 4 hours away from my parents house where I was staying while he was away. He didn’t bother to spend our anniversary together or even bother to say happy anniversary. Which killed me inside. On New Year’s Day I sent him a message that it seemed that he didn’t want me in his life anymore so I was setting him free. But on his way back to Texas he and I talked and we were going to make it work but 8 days later. He met a girl. He hide our marriage status, archived post that he made of me, and hid our pictures. Which made me think he did the same thing he did when I was away. I decided that I wasn’t going to stand for it so I asked him to file for divorce. He agreed. It was a little messy. I found pictures of him and this girl on a romantic date, he got dressed up in a suit, had a picture of her on his lap. So much which set me off and I became petty and tried to fuck him over with the army for it. This is where things get complicated. This week I had to go to separate our things because he had everything in a storage unit. When I got there we were polite to each other and we talked to each other. He explained to me that nothing happened with that girl. They went with a group but only made a reservation for two, she was awake for the picture of her hand on his lap, she was wearing the same clothes from that night in the morning cause she slept in them but she didn’t sleep at his apartment, and that she knew what was going on. Which I don’t know what to believe. I want to believe him and I kinda do believe him but I don’t know. I love him but everyone around me telling me to not believe him. I was a mess for months when things were going wrong between us. I didn’t want to lose him but I feel like I lost him. He said we can be friends. I want him in my life but I always want to be us again. I know in my heart that I can never really move on from him. I always want him in my life but I don’t know what to do or what to believe. My parents hate him because they believe he is a liar and will constantly hurt me but they say a tons of things that weren’t true. I just want an unbiased opinion from people who don’t know the shit I said while I was mad or sad. There’s a lot that happened this week with him but it’s been long story already I can explain more in the comments

My 7 year old(almost 8) loves godzilla. We draw pictures, play old games have a shelf in the living room. Hell his first movie in a theater was KOTM with me :) fast forward a bit. Thanks to gigabash and a poster I had for years he loves him some destroyah. Now let me just say I have loved the big G since I was his age but only ever had the orange library book and a few vhs tapes. It was much harder to find stuff back in the day. I have been loving getting caught up with all things godzilla the last few years with this community and even started watching some of the old movies with my kid. Godzilla 2000 last week and godzilla vs Destroyah tonight. He was loving this movie and then got pretty quite at the end. I lift my arm and see my poor sensitive boys eyes completely red and gives me a big hug about how he can't believe what happened to his buddy G.......whoops. so the double whammy of godzilla Jr going down and the meltdown broke this poor kids heart. I had to explain that jr absorbed the energy and grew up to be the godzilla with the cool spikes we just watched last week (maybe? I'm grasping at straws trying to cheer him up) Crisis averted, we are now making our own godzilla comic book and making ice cream Sundays. So for any dads/moms on here, double check the synopsis before you expose your kids to their hero dying horribly haha. My bad

Hello,
I am a mod on researchchemicals. We only allow text posts. However, When attempting to post from mobile, there are three mandatory fields

• Title
• Enter link
• body text (optional)

Many of our users are apparently encountering the same problem, cannot post without entering a link from Android mobile, and many are simply entering google.com as a workaround. This is seen abundant on my subreddit so does not seem to be an isolated issue.
See picture of post screen on my android mobile phone here.
My reddit android version is 2024.20.2 downloaded from the official Google Play Store.
Please advice.

For me, it's how curling isn't just a game about consistency, but adaptability to the changing ice conditions. Trying to explain how the ice affects the curling rocks is also something I find difficult to explaining to people who don't play curling. The best comparison I've thought of so far is "Think of how in basketball, making a basket from the same starting position is the exact same movements. Now picture if the basketball was swapped for a balloon or a dodgeball. You're still making the same shot, but you have to adjust."