Horoscope cancer man dating

So basically I've been trying to get context on the situation for a little while. Pretty much everyone in my life makes me feel like I'm screwed . Therapists included. I'm sorry if this doesn't make sense. I've very confused and disoriented right now. Every one makes me feel like I'm beyond help.
So on Valentine's Day, my roommate overdosed and died. We were Incredibly Close and I would consider him my first love. The relationship had ended because I watched him overdose three times before I had to move out. I had known him for 7 years and he was absolutely my best friend and was encouraging, patient, helped me pursue my dreams.
For five of the years that I had known my roommate I was also dating my ex on and off. He admits to love bombing me in the beginning. Usually you would break up with me and it would be really messy. He would just absolutely like verbally trash me in long text messages. I used to engage in trash and back but eventually I realized that it wasn't hurting or doing anything to him . He himself mentioned that he blocked everything out that I said during those times . But I remember everything. if I blocked him he would make other accounts or he would call like a hundred times. But you would always come back a few months later after dating someone else.
For 5 years it was this on and off weird relationship that even my roommate would get annoyed by. My ex would come back swooping in saying I've changed I'm a better man blah blah.
So for about 2 years we felt pretty solid but something wasn't right for me. When my roommate overdosed the second time I had to move out of my apartment very quickly. I ended up living closer to my ex and we had sex for the first time in 5 years. And then on Valentine's Day my roommate actually passed away. I found out because he wasn't responding to me so I called a wellness check and my ex ended up driving me halfway to the place I used to live to check up on him before I got the call from the ME. There was a lot of wailing and vomiting on the car ride home I don't think I've ever been so upset.
About 2 months ago I opened up to my ex about some kind of crappy things that I reminded to me early on in our friendship. He was pretty pissed at me for it and he also kept telling me that my roommate was going to hell. I established that I don't like when he says that and that it's not helpful because I did love my roommate.
Anyways he just kept saying it several times throughout the end times of our relationship. And then during the time he also decided that he was moving across the country to live back in with his parents. He at first didn't want to tell me because he felt like I was already dealing with too much crap. They had been really inconsistent with me and was acting weird. And at first he wanted me to move with him but then he just wanted a fresh start because he didn't want to be with someone who he treated poorly. So there was lot of back and forth and we kind of randomly got into it about a week ago. I'm not even sure what caused it he was still telling me he loves me and that he thinks I'm beautiful and flirting with me complimented me blah blah blah but then he just like dipped out when I mentioned that I'm not sure we should see each other anymore. Because the last plan that we had decided on was that we were going to at least hang out together and he was going to come with me to an event that I bought tickets for- because he felt like he owed me that. But again he was like I'm so unfulfilled and I don't think we should see eachother.
Anyways I just immediately blocked him on everything including phone Snapchat venmo. I wanted nothing to do with him because the event was very special to me and he knew that.
So about an hour ago, he leaves that I've been wanting for a little while at my door along with a "extra special thank you note" that says " I saw this and thought of you. Thank you for being exactly what I needed at a time where I needed you the most thank you for always having my back supporting me and my dreams and encouraging me to grow. I'm sorry I couldn't be the man you deserved but just know that I'll always love you and I'll never forget you. I know you're destined to do amazing things in Brightn the lives of countless people. But most importantly thanks for being my best friend"
Okay so like what is this bs? This is a very condensed version of everything

https://x.com/rxdxmxncy_angxl/status/1791631093730308537
Honestly it still baffles me how people are still on this after 2 months. Avantika has definitely been affected by this mentally, even if she doesn't say it. Posts like these that garner thousands of millions of views and likes CANNOT be positively affecting Avantika. Brown women have been sexualized and masculinized since the dawn of time and colonization. Apparently the drawer OP is a light skinned East Asian MAN and tried to claim they can't be racist against another Asian Woman. This also opens the discussion of proximity to whiteness and colorism. I am honestly in complete shock at these. Especially since the past 2 years (Even before covid) interviewers ask "What race would you not date" and most people answer Indian (not a race lmfao and we all know they mean south asians in general). Honestly these posts evoke so much rage in me and I truely feel so sad about how the younger south asian population are growing up. The internet calling them ugly, people in real life not wanting to date/interact with Indians cause of prejudice. Honestly a lot of these things are happening on the internet but they DO in fact translate into real life.
Anyways this is a long rant but the way they portray Brown Women in media and try to make them look evil is shocking and disappointing.

I tend to feel delayed grief consistently. I just left somewhat of an abusive relationship yes I was hit, threatened and tormented and spoken down on consistently but no he never left significant marks. Just hurt me just enough to scare me and make me cry then yell at me for crying… idk whatever. Point is it’s 1 am now, 2 weeks of no contact finally passed he’s finally given up calling and messaging me and threatening me from every single social app he knows and he can’t reach me anymore and have changed my number.
If it was so bad why do I miss him so much and literally feel this way now… I know the entire last few months with him I was miserable and kept telling him things like about how sad I was and how he just kept being a monster. The final straw was when he referred to his own mother as “this lady” and started calling her nasty names as he does to me bc she made him food but he didn’t like the smell of it and got mad bc she told him to eat some. Referred to her as “this stupid lady”. I called him out as I always do bc seeing that is disgusting especially as he’s a freaking felon I remind him his mother doesn’t owe him food at his grown age of 28 and to make his own food next time to avoid that issue. and that when he got out of jail she could have changed the locks and not let him live there rent free while he treated her terribly… so ofc instead of acknowledging it like he never does he brings up the one and only time I ever messed up 5 years ago (before we even started dating and we’re only talking but that’s an even longer story).
I feel like throwing up and I know going back in just disrespecting myself and feeling down again. I know I’d feel sad with him and just as sad now without him. I know I need to love myself but he really took me down thru the mud and I just go thru the days now like a zombie just trying to get to the next day. He never did anything for me he was never thoughtful or kind and never reciprocated then tormented me and made me suffer and he enjoyed it. Then apologize and make up. I’ve heard that’s the tactic these kind of people use, torment u then remedy it even tho the torment was never necessary in the first place. I was disrespected consistently thru phone text in person in my car in my own home… all while he got everything he wanted from me. Why was I so desperate to please him.
Now I find myself trying to latch onto any other person I meet. I met someone last week and kissed him and feel disgusting. I feel lost and I haven’t cried these past 2 weeks but today it’s really hitting me hard. I don’t have anyone to talk to and I just want this to pass so badly. Just venting. I haven’t eaten and am becoming addicted to how I look now just skinny and tired like a corpse. I sleep probably 3 hours at most and stay up the majority of the night until the morning and even when I can eat I. Just can’t ever finish anything - 3 bites and I’m nauseous. I regret kissing that person last week and initiating a sort of friendship bc now when their attention is not on me I feel extremely worse even tho I know they owe me nothing and know nothing about what I’m going thru. My home makes me feel sad I put everything he ever gave me ina closet today and the only way I can sort of see him is through his online store. And I feel horrible bc he use to updated his products everyday. Except maybe something happened to him or he’s sad too bc he hasn’t updated it in 5 days. I need to get rid of that app too it’s what’s hurting me most today that I can’t fully let go.
I thought we’d have children together and get married he is genuinely my other half but why does it feel so wrong leaving him when he hurt me so much. Loyalty wasn’t an issue it was EVERUTHING else. To the point that everyday something brought up an argument that escalated way past normal arguments into bullying and name calling territory and his ego so big he couldn’t just be a man he had to make sure he came out on top always while I had to make myself small and bow down.
I’m hurting so bad now. I think it hurts more bc it was that easy for him also to let it go. All the threats about showing up to my building and knocking my door down and nothing ever happened. This whole time I was just stupid foolish and dumb over a man who felt large just by threatening and scaring me constantly when he maybe never even truly cared. I feel so stupid I wish I could scrub my brain rn I can’t stop smoking these disgusting black and milds now either. I’ve been seeing my sisters more often now and it helps that my sis is also going thru a similar breakup not involving dv but just certain aspects that are similar to toxicity. I don’t want anyone to feel sad I hope no one feels as Sad as I do now.

TW: Abuse
I'm here to vent, but I wouldn't mind some support, if possible. Things are not going well for me right now.
My dad is very much present in my life, but it's apparent to everyone that he f'd all of his kids up.
To summarize, the man was born in the middle of the Vietnam War. He spent three years of homelessness in communist Vietnam with his entire family during his childhood, and consistently reminds us of this to this very day. It's been his way of dismissing any protests my siblings have had towards the things he'd done to us - hitting us with rolled up newspapers like dogs, verbal and psychological abuse, frequent displays of intimidation - at one point, my mom had suspected sexual abuse as well.
I developed a rare soft tissue tumor in 7th grade. It broke through the skin, and I had to be rushed to the ER. He immediately blamed me because of a superstition of not eating red meat after an operation. At the time, I was severely anemic, underweight, and spent the night in the hospital getting two bags of blood infused. 3 years later, I was put in a psych ward for an eval after some remarks to a counselor. He was banned from seeing me, and blamed my mom(who we only saw on weekends) for f'ing me up. "She's doing this shit for attention," he says.
Fast forward to today. I've developed another tumor, which turned out to be cancer this time. Two weeks ago, I had a follow up with my oncologist. They have concerns about my most recent CT scan, and think it may be lung cancer. I've barely been able to get out of bed since then. My mental health is garbage, and I'm not able to do as much physical labor as I could do - especially when I'm working with an arm that is visibly missing a huge chunk of bicep muscle, swollen, and nerve damage in my hand. "Cancer is no excuse to be lazy."
I've also expressed interest in getting my MSW to become a therapist, as it's something I've unofficially been doing for everyone in my family since I was 12, and I'd make more money than I'm making now with a State job (12.50/hr). I was pushed into the state job by my dad because my film degree is garbage, like the rest of my aspirations. Now, my dad can't fathom that I get paid less for being single and childless. He's also pointed out that I've gained weight - something that's been a sore spot for me all my life - and he's only complimented me when I rapidly dropped weight from both tumors.
Thanks to all of that, I have severe anxiety attacks when SOMETHING goes wrong - it could be anything. I have such low self esteem, and possibly early stages of BD. If I had moved back closer to my dad, I'm certain I would develop an ED. I've considered offing myself many times since 5th grade, and I'm surprised I haven't done it yet. If I make it past 30, I'd be surprising my 16 year old self. Using the excuse "what will happen to my pets?" isn't inspiring my will to live like it used to.

So, I've (30 f) been with mostly men for a huge majority of my life. I felt I was meant to service men, not for any specific religious reason, but moreso trauma from my childhood. Anyway, I tried hard to fit the mold. Even married a textbook narcissist at 19 and going through an abusive rollercoaster. With them, I came out as queer for the first time, though he didn't like that much. Fastfoward past our divorce and many other men I dated to fit the mold of what I was supposed to be- in service of men- I finally started dating women. I came out as a lesbian at 26, or around that time, and got into a three-year relationship with a horrible abusive woman I met online and moved states to be with, only to watch her spend money on weed and neglect her son. After that, I dated a few other women; one was even an engagement, but that ended on a raw-end. I dated one man a final time, trying to fix myself, but I couldn't fake the motions and he fit the narcissistic mold my exes tend to fit, I met my current spouse while living with my ex (we were no longer together) and his then girlfriend. They are nonbinary and swept in to save me from the chaos that was my life. Since meeting them, my relationship with women have changed to become healthier and I feel more confident. Through their patience and self love, I finally came out fully as a lesbian and haven't looked back. People judge just because my partner is amab nonbinary, but I feel the title of a polyamorous lesbian fits me best because they have been the only person I've ever felt a genuine romantic attachment to, including my ex-husband, who isn't a female. I love them very much, to the ends of the earth, and they've accepted my sexuality as a best friend and lover should, with joy and acceptance. They have been who has helped me grow more confident and I'm just using subreddits for lesbians for the first time and it's exhilarating! Thank you for listening to me ramble <3

Hello Reddit, I never post and I usually just read fellow stories but I could really use some advice and apologies in advance for bad writing(I’m in a bad state):
I(21F) dated my ex(23M) for two years. We met during covid through mutual friends that were dating. I poured a lot of effort into our relationship and I still care him very much. He initiated the break up after I told to him about wanting better communication because he was becoming distant and he says he felt bad about all the pain he caused me and wanting to attend nursing school saying he wouldn’t have time. It was very abrupt and I haven’t handled it well at all because it was a big decision I didn’t get to be involved in making. I know it sounds stupid and he hurt me a lot but I’ve never been this close to someone before so it has been the most painful experience for me.
For some backstory on me: I live a very isolated life. Before meeting my best friend and him I had no one to talk to. I would open up to her however she is currently going through so much with her dad’s aggressive cancer diagnosis and I don’t want to burden her any further. I’ve been struggling alone for a long time and have also been dealing with bad depression my whole life. I lost more than just my relationship since then. In a way this is my last desperate attempt for help. I had never felt happy in life before meeting him and he has helped me so much in life. I hate living isolated again, I don’t want to be sad all the time and I don’t want to feel guilty for wanting to heal. I feel like I’m cheating or being disloyal. But I genuinely loved caring for someone so much.
Is there any advice that could help me heal? Thank you to those who do read this and have advice I am grateful for any words.
(There is some information left out that I’d be happy to fill in if needed)

My ex/BD is now with someone else
I (27f) left my daughters father (28m) 3 years ago. He cheated on me the whole pregnancy and was mentally/emotionally abusive. I still have not gotten into another relationship nor have I slept with anyone else. I left him when our daughter was barely 3 months old and she has been in my custody about 90% of the time (which I’m not complaining about at all. I am so blessed to have my babygirl so much) . He claims that he just works so much and doesn’t have a lot of free time for her (or his other child from a previous relationship). He and i have tried to mend our relationship a few times over the years but it just never worked. I still carry a lot of pain from the trauma of the relationship. I’ve tried therapy, meditation, and just plain grieving but i still break down over it every once in a while (maybe 3 times a year). No matter what I do, how I’m doing, or what I have going on, i still feel such deep pain from what he did. It’s really messed me up in the head and i don’t trust a single soul. I don’t let anyone get too close. Today, i see that he is now with another woman. I know he’s been sleeping with other women since I’ve left. (That’s how he’s always been. He’s always been sexually involved with somebody/anybody since he was 14) but seeing him POST another woman was like a dagger in my heart. How can he just go on like I never existed? I have never loved anyone the way I did him. When i say i gave that man my heart and soul , I’m not exaggerating. I gave up so much and did so much for him because I loved him more than anything in this world. I cant even be sexually intimate with another person. I cant even allow myself to fall for anyone. I’ve TRIED. I’ve gone on dates, met new guys, all that. But I’m absolutely stuck. And i don’t know why. And i don’t know how to get unstuck. I hate feeling this way and I just wanna not be in pain anymore. I cant take it.
Just needed to get this out. I don’t like taking about the BS anymore and if i do talk about it with anyone i feel guilty for still being so upset. I just want to send this into the abyss of Reddit and just pray i don’t feel this way yet again when i wake up

Is it that bad to date someone who has got money? Why is it even considered wrong? Besides, I have never seen a well-earning man use that term. Not even the ones who have "actually" got gold.
Even women go on calling others gold-diggers for dating someone who makes more money than them?

Alt account because kaafi known folks on reddit. Anyways I hail from a tier-1 city and compared to the most of dudes out there I have had a privileged upbringing with a fair share of first world problems. Despite of that my parents miraculously kept me firmly grounded and I fairly come across as a normal chap when it comes to in life appearances.
I recently shifted to Delhi for a degree and career change. Now a key thing to note my profession sort of relies on networking a fair bit if you want to make it in the long run as a first gen person. So as soon as college starts I start socialising beyond my normal scope. As a result I met some really intresting individuals right off the bat. Including a man who claimed to understand me rationally and logically. Now tbvh. That's really cool if you ask me. And I immediately hit it off with him. We became really good friends and I started opening up about my recent break up etc etc. Intrestingly I'd open up to him about every intresting female interaction I'd have in college and my part time job female interactions. Now due to certain external factors and my naive nature I never really sat and questioned his negative reinforcement about the above-mentioned interactions. I was literally just nodding along. For a good year every single female interactions I had always had some kind of problems in his logical mind. Eventually I stopped telling him less.
(this also happened because of his constant narrative that this college wasn't a dating ground for men like me and him who chase brain and personality rather than a conventional hot Instagram profile)
Gradually that came to a halt because I wasn't getting constructive criticism. It was just odd shit really. A couple of months later he confides in me that he's in a "secret relationship" with a lady whose idea he had wholeheartedly rejected a couped of months back to due to the logic : 1) She doesn't look good enough for him 2) She's not that intellectually superior.
Now as much as the fallacy annoys me I try not to judge. We all make mistakes in the line of passion. But like eventually after I started paying attention I realized this pattern of manipulation at a very mass level. Dudes be discouraging competion and have started acting out in wild ways. I'm not being sexist here at all but I swear upar ki ram katha throws me back to school, my female bestie telling how her other female friend screwed her up. What's more horrifying is that I'm in a pg degree. We're all workforce people. Every one is 23 and above and the dude in question might be 28 easily. Like l genuinely thought I'd be meeting people jinke Saath work opportunities explore kar sakta hu aur yaha pe bandiya ke piche they're ruining connections. It's quite mortifying honestly. I had an idea that men are down bad but apne dost ko bhi nahi chod rahe ab toh yeh ladke.

Looking for others who can relate and who may have felt this same way at one point. Advice is welcome. ❤️
I’m in my mid-twenties now and have been single for 6 months. My ex was a nice man, but he was not able to meet my needs and often invalidated my feelings. He wasn’t the first man to do this to me. So I started going to therapy regularly, gained some self confidence back, and have been vigorously putting myself out there on dating apps and in real life too. All my closest friends are in happy relationships, and I also want to meet my best friend and share my life with someone special. Currently, I’m seeing someone as a fwb, and he’s great, but he doesn’t check all my boxes for a relationship. So I continue on with my search as a single woman in her 20s. To be very honest, I feel extremely lonely. I believe this is partly due to the culture of dating apps, and perhaps modern dating rituals in general. Right now, I’m on Tinder and Hinge and I’ve been love-bombed on these apps multiple times. We will talk and have great conversations for a week or two, getting on really well, and then radio silence. Sometimes I’ve even gone on dates with these people. Men are also constantly not replying when I message first, which confuses me as I thought this was a positive thing for a woman to do in their eyes… If they do reply, maybe we will have a decent banter and a couple back a forth messages, and then they become so dry! Their replies turn into single words for reasons I struggle to understand. The last thing Ive noticed on the apps is the absolute lack of initiative these men have in making plans to meet in person. It feels like this ball is always left in my court. To some, this isn’t an issue, but I want a man who is ambitious and assertive. It’s as though they tip toe around making a plan, leaving hints but never being straight forward. And this isn’t just men in their 20s I’m meeting on the apps, it’s men in their 30s too. It’s gotten to a point where I am frequently disappointed and exhausted by the culture. Especially as I curate my profile to get more matches, put effort into witty responses and try to message first as much as I can. Sometimes I tell myself that I need to take a break and get off the apps, but then I think that will only put me one-step backwards from where I want to be, which is with my person.
If it were easier to meet someone in-person, then I would not be bothering with online dating. Unfortunately, no one goes up and talks to you at the bar anymore either. Maybe this is just an issue where I live. I’m curious to know if other women find the same thing when they go out in their city.
Anyways! The rant is over now. I hope this helps some other women out there feel seen too. Good luck to all us single ladies, because we need it!

Here’s some background information to help you guys assess the situation, I am a 60 year old woman, and this is a relatively new problem with my on and off again boyfriend for the past 13 years. It’s been a rollercoaster we’ve lived with eachother for multiple years and we’ve also broken up three times over the 13 years, the most recent breakup was my decision two years prior to this, and guy (we will name my boyfriend guy) took the break up very hard. We recently about 6 months ago started talking again and got back together, the sex that we’ve had now has been tremendously better than ever before it’s easily the best I’ve ever had, he performs differently it’s like he’s a whole different man in bed.
He recently got a new job a year ago and who else but his ex wife to work there as well! Him and his ex wife ended on bad terms 20 years ago and hadn’t spoken since, but when they saw each other at work they kinda became friends again. Anyways during sometime between the last time we broke up and since we got back together now, he had moved in with his ex wife because he had to leave where he was living at before. I later learned from guy that ex wanted to rekindle relationship, but allegedly guy had no interest and denied such offer.
He finally moved out from his ex a few months ago to his own home that he shares with roommates. It was weird to me once we got back together I had basically let everyone I know aware that we were back together but guy didn’t want to tell any of his family or friends or even his ex wife that has been blowing him up all the time.
He can’t really give me a reason why he hasn’t told anyone his response is “I don’t know” so that got me feeling a type of way, and I couldn’t but help go on his phone one night while he was asleep. Now he told me previously that he goes on porn sites (like every guy) which I have no problem with, what I have a problem with is this isn’t just porn it’s online dating sites and webcams that talk directly to the girls, I told him how uncomfortable this made me feel and he promised he would stop doing it immediately, some more background info, guy and my son have always been very close and kept contact thru all, and son let me know that since last break up guy had spent about $5k on dating sites (the shady ones that were probably fake) chatting with the girls.
Anyways after our talk about how he would stop, in short he didn’t, he would claim he keeps just getting notifications and doesn’t know how to make them go away so he would click it trying to delete it and couldn’t figure out how. Now I’ll give it to him at the time that sounded reasonable and I beleived him, I tried to delete them myself then from his phone, and I did but somehow the sites kept popping up in his history whenever I checked his phone. He again said they were just notifications but shoutout to google it clearly says what he typed in the search bar and then the links he clicked after typing.
At this point he just went irate and I think it’s cause he ran out of excuses and he just completely lashed out and went berserk, he began telling me this was all my problem and that I was the crazy one, every time this argument would come up (all the time) he would tell me it’s not his doing it viruses or notifications popping up , and always promises to me it’s not him going on the sites he’s just trying to get rid of them, but after every argument the sites kept popping up in his recent history, my instincts have been telling me this whole time that he is trying to establish a relationship (‘s) and is just using me in the meantime until something better comes along.
Sorry for writing a whole book but any input would be seriously appreciated! Thank you!!

Bad Company
Id: xxx Cat: Logos Date: 2024-05-19 06:36:00
Facts are affected by the same antiprojection(*) that the Logos permits to understanding and proposition.
Each Figurative Form has its (own) objects and elements in varying numbers, according to convenience.
To create, one must first create meaning, which is the task of the Figurative Form from outside the world. This meaning includes objects, propositions, elements, substance, facts, God, Man, and Otherness.
The Logos only empowers contingency; all power in the case of the God-Man-dog identity.
https://www.reddit.com/Sacred_Anthropology/comments/12s4nal/almighty_dog/
https://www.reddit.com/Sacred_Anthropology/comments/14ittx8/dog_lawye
https://www.reddit.com/Sacred_Anthropology/comments/1clcewg/almighty_%CE%BB%CF%8C%CE%B3%CE%BF%CF%82/
The Being and superseding being share the same world in immediate connection of objects and elements, created and uncreated, through propositions and facts, as a creation emanating from the Figurative Forms.
Faced with a prophetic imperative, not only must self-consciousness desert, but the Law must also desert. It is the mad sign of the Logos and its condemnation to the eternity of proposition.
(*) Antiprojection is fishing God from the sea of Otherness to sign contracts with Man. It is the decision about being that turns it into nothingness. The appearance of being possessed by nothingness is classic. There is no other way to confuse fools. God does not possess any strange object when becoming Logos through contracts between men, except for the mad sign that invades His self-consciousness when contracting with man.
***********************************************************
Las malas compañías Id: xxx Cat: Logos Date: 2024-05-19 06:36:00
«Los hechos están afectados de la misma antiproyección(*) que el Logos permite al entendimiento y la proposición.
Cada Forma Figurativa tiene sus propios objetos y elementos en distinto número, según conveniencia.
Para crear, antes hay que crear el sentido, de lo que se encarga la Forma Figurativa desde fuera del mundo. En el sentido van incluidos los objetos, las proposiciones, los elementos, la sustancia, los hechos, Dios, el Hombre, y la Otredad.
El Logos solo da poder a la contingencia; todo poder en el caso de la identidad Dios-Hombre-perro.
https://www.reddit.com/Sacred_Anthropology/comments/12s4nal/almighty_dog/
https://www.reddit.com/Sacred_Anthropology/comments/14ittx8/dog_lawye
https://www.reddit.com/Sacred_Anthropology/comments/1clcewg/almighty_%CE%BB%CF%8C%CE%B3%CE%BF%CF%82/
El ser y el superser compartiendo un mismo mundo en conexión inmediata de objetos y elementos, creados e increados, a través de proposiciones y hechos, como creación emanada de las Formas Figurativas.
Ante un imperativo profético, no solo debe desertar la autoconciencia, también debe desertar la Ley. Este es el signo loco del Logos, y su condenación a la eternidad de la proposición.
(*) Antiproyectar es pescar a Dios del mar de la Otredad, para firmar contratos con el Hombre. Es la decisión sobre el ser que lo convierte en la nada. Es clásica la apariencia de ser que posee la nada. No hay otra forma de confundir a los necios. Dios no posee ningún objeto extraño cuando deviene en Logos a través de contratos entre hombres, salvo el signo loco que invade su autoconciencia cuando contrata con el hombre.

I’ve been thinking a lot about dating dynamics and attractiveness, and I wanted to get some perspective from women here. I often see discussions where women say that men could get laid more easily if they lowered their standards. This got me wondering: How would you feel if a guy deliberately went for you because he thought you were less attractive and therefore more attainable?
To clarify, this isn’t about how often people get approached in general, but specifically about the idea that someone might choose to pursue you not because of a genuine attraction, but because they perceive you as an “easier” option compared to more conventionally attractive women.

1. Have you ever felt like a man’s “lowered standard”? 2. How would you feel if you knew a guy saw you as more attainable because he thought you were less attractive? 

I (30F) left an 8 year relationship about 6 months ago (we broke up almost 1 year ago but there's been 6 months of a grey area), and honestly I'm starting to regret it. I was really unfulfilled in that relationship and we were incompatible. He wanted a house in the middle of nowhere, I wanted to live in the city. He was anti-social, strongly disliked people and I was craving a social life. He was a homebuddy and I felt a bit trapped/stuck in that relationship. I felt like it had run its course, but we still had a great sex life and we got along really well. Our lifegoals just did not align, which was making me unhappy. But I miss him sometimes.
The issue is, I've tried dating apps, and it turns me off so badly, I'm starting to question if I am even into men to begin with. It's also hard to meet people organically.
I can't develop any chemistry on dating apps, with anyone. In my early 20's, at the start of dating app, I had a lot of fun on there, I hooked up with a couple guys, but now I can't even understand how to even proceed. I can hold conversations easily, I can tell the guys I go on a date with are often interested, the night usually goes well, we talk a lot and laugh a lot. But I don't feel any attraction to any of them, ever. I always feel like I'm just spending time with a friend, but it's usually not what they're looking for.
It never goes beyond a first date, I usually turn down a second date because I don't want to lead them on. They're usually fairly attractive. I'm never really excited for any of them and don't feel like keeping contact after the first date, aside maybe to stay friends sometimes. I still have a sex drive. I miss both sexual and emotional intimacy, I really crave it, I just can't seem to get there with anyone. I feel like I physically cringe whenever a man tries to get physical with me (like touching my arm).
Is this normal? Is anyone else like that? Should I push through second dates? How do you deal with this?

Hey there!
As the title states, I'm on a search for short term voice chats through discord. Nothing crazy, nothing serious, just a simple conversation. Could be about anything or nothing, whatever works. Please don't ask for text chat, I'm horrible at those.
Although I may not identify as a man or a woman, my voice is rather feminine... Or at least I think so. No one's ever said anything about it so I'm going with my default settings if you catch my drift.
If you're in California that'd be super cool, but definitely not a requirement. All I ask is that you're in your 30's too and that you won't be mean 🥲
If anything about this vague post interests you, reach out! If you msg a bit too late, but are open to perhaps scheduling a vc at a later date, also let me know. :)

Am I crazy? I'm writing this drunk and high. At 12:34 on a Saturday night. Probably because I wouldn't write it at any other time. I think I'm forever single. I've been in a relationship before. One. It started when I was 17 and ended when I was 19. I'm not sure if it was love or puppy love. I almost entered a relationship a few months after that with this gorgeous guy, but I wanted to be single and wasn't interested in being smothered anymore. Flashforward to 2024, a week after my 25th birthday, I haven't been in a relationship since. Hell, I haven't even been close to being in a relationship since. I haven't spoken to a boy/guy/man for more than 12 hours since. (I say 'boy/guy/man' because I feel like at my age, that's what you've gone through. When you're a teen, you date boys. In college, guys. When you've been contributing to a 403b for almost 4 years? Men? Right?? Men. I do looooove men. Anyway...) I am/I've been on the apps. I've had hot Grindr hookups. I've had horrible, terrible Grindr hookups. I go to gay bars in NYC, Fire Island, Florida, Vegas, PTown. No one seems to be interested in me. I dont have abs. My weight flucuates often. I suffer from anxiety and I love smoking weed. I've been really focused on work and starting my career. But, surely, many gay men who would say all of the above are in happy, committed relationships. But I'm not even sure that's what I want. A (straight) couple that I haven't seen in months caught up with me tonight and, of course, one of the first questions they asked was my relationship status. "Oh dont worry, I didn't find him until I was 38!," the woman exclaimed. When speaking to an acquaintance tonight, she brought up a guy that we both mutually know. "He's 30 and has never seriously dated anyone or brought anyone around," she remarked. As a put-down. As evidence to prove how immature this guy is.
Huh.
Does this mean I'm immature? Is this what people say about me? It's not that I dont want a relationship. It'd be cool, I guess. I'm not asexual. In fact, I'm like the horniest person I know. Except after college, I've barely had sex with anyone. Being in a relationship that guarantees regular sex would be awesome. Maybe it's a confidence issue? When my weight flucuates, I get really self-concious. When I'm anorexic and draw attention to myself, I grow confident. I guess I dont outwardly seek relationships, like a lot of the people around me. I'm cool with staying home. I'm not necessarily a relationship person, like a lot of the people around me, either. I work hard and enjoy being self-depedent. I like smoking and watching a movie by myself. I'm cool eating alone at a restaurant. I love treating myself to a Broadway show. I guess, after writing this all out, I'm wondering if anyone can relate? Is this normal? Is a relationship the end goal? Is that what I should strive for? I'm so young, I know, but I feel like an old fucking maid. I'm not sure what I want. But I've seen some single, lonely old men that are just so sad. And I think to myself, "Is that what I want to be?" I'd like to say that, 'I'm just meant to live the Carrie Bradshaw lifestyle!' But Carrie dated and actually slept with people (sometimes regularly too)! Then, she ended up with the guy. I guess I'm just looking for clarity and thoughts. Thanks guys ❤️

So I basically married a man who I thought would be the love of my life. We fell pregnant pretty instantly after starting to date. I wanted a life with him all the kids and the family. It progressively has gotten worse. He got into sissy porn, buying masturbation devices behind my back, he even went as far to download a gay app and planned to meetup with a trans woman to have sex. They even planned on inviting a girl to have a threesome. After that event I lost pretty much all respect for him. I forgave him for it. He blamed me said it was because all we had been doing was arguing. Mind you, I had my baby shower 4 days before he left to go on this trip, and he didn’t even show up to his own son’s baby shower. It’s been a nightmare of a time but he apologized and said he wants to make things right and that he messed up really bad. Whatever. Gave him another chance. We moved into a house together. I’m 5 days overdue, baby can be here at any moment. We’ve reached a point in our relationship now where he doesn’t go places with me, won’t ride in a car with me, if I’m driving the car he’s constantly complaining saying how I’m a terrible driver, he never takes me out on dates or asks me to go anywhere with him, he doesn’t want to go to the park with me, doesn’t want to take our dog on walks with me, doesn’t even want to sit and chill on the couch with me cause once I start talking he tells me to be quiet and to leave him alone. I’m pretty sure he’s just giving absolutely no effort at this point, and I keep enabling it and staying out of my love for him. A lot of it has to deal with us about to have our first baby also. Speaking of, I paid for us to attend birthing classes and he only went to 2 of them. Argued with me the entire way there too made it seem like it was unnecessary for him to be there. Anyways. I can’t help but want to seek out other male attention at this point because I am So neglected by my husband during such a vulnerable part of my life. My question is though, what MEN out there would date a woman who just had a child? Is there anyone who would even consider? I’m not even necessarily looking for something super serious. It’s mainly just some sort of flirting, sexting, affection, hugs, company, going out and doing fun things etc. (I’m speaking in terms of whenever I have my baby, after I separate from my husband and give it some time)
I just don’t know anything about the dating world with children. I feel very deprived of love and affection. My husband has acted out many times and I’ve stayed. I can only think at this point of doing the same back to him. I know FWB is a thing, how do men feel about that with a woman who has a child? I guess this post would be seeking advice/support. Cause I’m just a mess at what to do right now.

Using a throwaway account for reasons. There are also some details whether seemingly important or not that I am omitting for brevity--this is strictly about the subject and the future.
To begin, and to drive right into the complications, I am currently going through a divorce. I was married for 3.5 years or so after being with stbxw for 9 years. We grew through our 20s together and while things were fine in our early 20s we had a lot of issues as we started transitioning into adults. I started a new job last fall and my past relationship with soon to be ex wife was already falling apart and we were also attempting to recover from an affair she had with our old neighbor, she was still having the affair after promising and lying. I am quickly moving on and deserve better. I always was loyal to my wife. Though, we have a 4 year old daughter and spontaneous triplet boys who are about a year old together to boot which is crazy. We started the divorce this past winter.
To back-track, within a month of my new job, which started last summer working as a project manager, a new project coordinator I was partnered with joined the company. We will call her Elle. This woman is insanely out of my league. She is insanely beautiful, smart, kind, mature, etc. and we quickly bonded over the fact that we both lost a parent in the past, my mom in 2014 and her father in 2015. Elle and I formed a strong friendship within our team and I started observing that she cared about my issues quickly.
She is from Chicago and kind of moved out here (AZ) to be with her boyfriend of 2 years or so whom she has a weird broken relationship with. Elle and I quickly got along, we shared similar senses of humor, some similar interests, I found that we had a growing chemistry throughout the fall. Around Thanksgiving and throughout December I started missing her quite a bit--I started noticing within myself that emotional and physical feelings were growing for her. I noticed that we were flirtatious at work quite often and that we had this insane connection when we locked eyes with each other. We were incredibly professional, always were, however it was becoming obvious in the office that we liked each other. A lot.
It was obvious what we were feeling for each other, so in December I confessed to her about how I was feeling and we quickly found that it was very mutual. Obviously there are complications here--I was starting a divorce and she lives and has a relationship with her boyfriend, and he tracks her.
Stbxw is a bit crazy to boot, and the fact that I have children with her is also complicated. However, for the past 4-5 months, Elle and I have kind of ignored our issues. We started coming in earlier and staying later together, getting coffee all the time together. We started hanging out after work parked in the garage and I would buy a bottle of wine and we'd hang out for hours drinking together. Getting really physical at job sites if we were alone. Things were escalating quickly. We started getting physical, making out, tried sex once but the issue for both of us is that she is essentially cheating on her boyfriend no matter how desperately we wanted it. Which is ironically what happened to me with my past relationship. I was just on the other side of it now.
We couldnt help it, our chemistry is really strong and I found myself thinking about her all the time, missing her, wanting to be with her. Same with her. We were sexting a lot and insanely flirtatious. We fell in love with each other. It kept getting stronger. We started talking about actually being in a relationship, hell, even talking about marriage and kids and shit. It was really intense and escalating quickly. She started asking for me to "be patient with her" and that "soon" we would be able to actually start dating, that she "needed to get out and deal with her situation on her own". We were constantly talking about a future together--things were getting serious. Hell, I even bought a nice ring for her as a token of my promise that I am hers. She wasnt, so she says, sleeping with her boyfriend, something I was getting a lot of intrusive thoughts about, we were waiting for each other. I toured an apartment with her as she was planning to move out, i could tell she didnt like it though, was homesick, and i talked to her about moving in with me which at one point was agreed on. But again, complicated.
Early March was the first "real" discussion we had about things though, as January and February were filled with those moments above. It was serious--she felt incredibly guilty for cheating on her boyfriend, saying she was a bad person, confused why she was doing what she was doing and I obviously felt it was wrong as I went through it myself previously and just as well a red flag for myself even if we became a couple I was running the risk of being with somebody capable of that, and we talked about that many times. But there was something obviously missing about her relationship with her boyfriend--they didnt get along and he treated her poorly in the beginning of their relationship that may or may not be a contributing factor to whats going on. She said we should stop, she mentioned she could be going back to Chicago and is seriously confused about her life and us being together, while we feel what we do, was a big step for both of us and I couldnt help but agree. It isnt a simple relationship approach given our "situations", a word that was used frequently between us.
Since then we have tried putting up walls with each other several times--it was and has been very difficult, no matter what we do, we know how we feel about each other and continued--though now we do not hang out in the garage, the sexting stopped a couple weeks ago or so--and now she truly is moving back to Chicago this summer which has put a timer and damper of sadness on this all. She also is moving back there with her boyfriend which is pretty disheartening as some would agree however she doesn't have much money so is kind of using him to get back there and she wants to be with her family and friends. Complicated. I dont know. I dont like it obviously. We attempted to come up with a game plan to mitigate this situation--no matter what we do, we end up getting coffee, spending time talking and seeing each other as much as we can at the office and enjoying our prescences with one another. She didnt request for me to wait for her, but she told me not to forget about her. There have been a couple times she said "who knows, maybe ill move back there and Ill just end up regretting it" and still have that strong feeling of a future together even though this is happening currently. We also need time for ourselves honestly--my divorce and her situation with her family/friends and her boyfriend thing, maybe she needs to re-discover herself in a way. Or she may end up settling with him. Ugh. Any possibility exists.
We still feel the way we do. We love each other and she says no man has ever treated her the way I do, looked at her the way i do--and mutually myself I feel like I have found the woman of my dreams. We honestly are like a power couple together. A true match in personality and looks. It just sucks, we see each other every day, I was semi-promoted so i have a different position now but still work closely together so its very hard and the undeniable chemistry is still there. The way we lock eyes is still there. She comes into my office often and talks to me, spends time with me and we make excuses to be around each other. We just know now that her moving back to her home in Chicago is a reality and WILL be happening now--so we arent talking as often as we used to. It definitely is deflating in a way--though the mutual feelings exist. We both have the feeling that once we "figure out our lives" maybe its something we can revisit. The future can be weird, and even when she leaves this summer I will have that hopeful "someday, one day" feeling about us.
Not really looking for advice, it is what it all is. Just sharing a relationship story.
TL;DR: coworker and I fell in love but things are complicated. we both have messy situations that need to be individually addressed-trying to write more bc post was removed for not having a tldr when it did. Anyway yeah our lives while we have strong feelings arent aligning at the moment

I’ll never understand why women are religious. I understand why men are, after all, they are the gods. They are the superiors and we are just the r*apebait, baby making slaves right?
Religions women disgust me. No self-respecting man would ever follow a religion that only/ mainly has female gods, that worships females, that calls females the creators, that has a “father” but can never acc mention that father, that constantly says that they are inferior to women, that men were the cause of the original sin/ that they are rhe root of evil cuz 1 (made up) “person” messed up and now everyone born their gender will have a painful and fucked up life, and so on and so forth. So why do women do it?
This is one of womens’ many flaws imo. Too forgiving. And because of that, i think that religions are right in saying that women are “obedient”. More men are atheists than women. It should be the other way around but women just wont leave this toxic relationship.
Im south asian. Almost all my family is hindu, and i sort of practised it too until i was about 10, then became an atheist. I am 19 now and have everlasting trauma and self-hate from those 10 years and just learning more about the different religions makes them hate them and my self more and more and more and more.
There is a ceremony that some people preform when a girl gets her first period. Absolutely barbaric and this was my breaking point to making me become an atheist. It’s basically am advertisement and it’s lowkey pedophilic cuz the whole idea of it is that they invite everyone and basically say “i have a daughter who can now have kids. So men, come up, and take a gander at her”. Basically saying that this 7-12 yr old is old enough for marriage and to have kids. And it just gives off “if she’s old enough to bleed, she’s old enough to breed” vibes.
And ofc men dont have anything this humiliating cuz why would they? Men actually have DIGNITY in this world that tries to shame, belittle and degrade women from the time we are born!
Oh and also right after i got it. Like the second after i got my first one. My stupid mom called all of her family and told them even when i told her not to. NO RESPECT FOR ME
I never did this stupid thing. I had to fight my parents to not do it and i dont regret what i did. BUT after not doing it, people (random ass family members mainly) would COME UP TO ME AND ASK ME IF I “WAS NORMAL” … NORMAL. THAT IS THE EXACT WORDING THEY USED. ASKED ME IF ANYTHING WAS “WRONG” with me! The answer is no. BUT WHY IS THAT ANYONES BUSINESS. WHY SHOULD MY BUSINESS BE SHARED TO ALL THESE PEOPLE WHO I DONT EVEN KNOW LIKE THIS? Like even if i did have endo or didnt get a period for whatever reason or whatever, THAT WOULD NOT MAKE ME “not NORMAL”. Do we treat anyone else with other diseases/ illnesses like this?! Do we tell people with cancer that they are “not normal”. NO BECAUSE THEY DONT CONTROL THAT (not in every case). They for the most part have condolences and best wishes. but the SECOND it is something that affects cis women, SOCIETY SHAMES THEM INSTEAD OF RESPECTING THEIR PRIVACY OR SHOWING THEM PITY OR CONCERN OR GIVING THEM USEFUL/ WANTED ADVICE
When you are on you period, you are “unclean” and apparently spread cooties or something idk. Just such childish thinking. Cuz ive had family members Litterally SNEEZE AND COUGH IN FOOD or cough without covering their mouths and my mom turns a blind eye to it. Defends them. Says theres nothing wrong and that they are not “actually sick”. But BUT …. If i am on my period and want to touch my own clothes in my own closet. Or if i had just finished my period and haven’t showered yet and go to touch my clothes, TELL ME WHY MY MOM THROWS A HISSY FIT TANTRUM GOING OFF ABOUT HOW IM “CONTAMINATING” all mu clothes and that everything ive touched now had to be washed ?!?!!?!!!?!!???? GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
YELLS AT ME FOR GOING TO THE KITCHEN IN MY OWN HOUSE. YELLS AT ME FOR PASSING THE PRAYER ROOM TO GET TO MY OWN BED ROOM. Like she knew she was raised like this and that she would do that to me. Should have just had an abortion (im from canada) the second she found out that i wasn’t a precious, clean baby boy , but instead am a dirty, impure female.
UK WHAT, just search up what “period huts” are on google 😀 and all the LITTERAL DEATHS THEY CAUSE CUZ PEOPLE WANNA BANISH GIRLS FROM THEIR HOMES FOR SOMETHING WE CAN NOT CONTROL NOT EVEN ALLOWED IN YOUR OWN HOME AND YOU ARE REDUCED TO A STRAY ANIMAL FOR YOUR PERIOD. In fact, despite the fact that these people throw those huge parties to announce a first period, periods are VERY taboo in south asia. To the point where women cant even have/ use pads or carry pads around so they have to resort to using cloth and leaves WHICH CAUSES INFECTIONS
WE HATE OUR GIRLS SO MUCH AND EVERYTHING THAT HAS TO DO WITH THEM THAT WE WOULD RATHER KILL THEM OR MAKE THEM TERRIBLY SICK THAN HELP THEM! Im crying writing this cuz im honestly at a loss for words.
That said, i dont think that hinduism is the worst one out there. There are definitely worse ones but this was just my experience and i needed to vent and maybe teach others some things and give reasons as to why we shouldn’t be following these MAN MADE LIES!

I (27f) left my daughters father (28m) 3 years ago. He cheated on me the whole pregnancy and was mentally/emotionally abusive. I still have not gotten into another relationship nor have I slept with anyone else. I left him when our daughter was barely 3 months old and she has been in my custody about 90% of the time (which I’m not complaining about at all. I am so blessed to have my babygirl so much) . He claims that he just works so much and doesn’t have a lot of free time for her (or his other child from a previous relationship). He and i have tried to mend our relationship a few times over the years but it just never worked. I still carry a lot of pain from the trauma of the relationship. I’ve tried therapy, meditation, and just plain grieving but i still break down over it every once in a while (maybe 3 times a year). No matter what I do, how I’m doing, or what I have going on, i still feel such deep pain from what he did. It’s really messed me up in the head and i don’t trust a single soul. I don’t let anyone get too close. Today, i see that he is now with another woman. I know he’s been sleeping with other women since I’ve left. (That’s how he’s always been. He’s always been sexually involved with somebody/anybody since he was 14) but seeing him POST another woman was like a dagger in my heart. How can he just go on like I never existed? I have never loved anyone the way I did him. When i say i gave that man my heart and soul , I’m not exaggerating. I gave up so much and did so much for him because I loved him more than anything in this world. I cant even be sexually intimate with another person. I cant even allow myself to fall for anyone. I’ve TRIED. I’ve gone on dates, met new guys, all that. But I’m absolutely stuck. And i don’t know why. And i don’t know how to get unstuck. I hate feeling this way and I just wanna not be in pain anymore. I cant take it.
Just needed to get this out. I don’t like taking about the BS anymore and if i do talk about it with anyone i feel guilty for still being so upset. I just want to send this into the abyss of Reddit and just pray i don’t feel this way yet again when i wake up

Hi. I am a 23 year old mom of a 3 year old, her bio dad and I split when she was around 8 months old. He was spotty until eventually he stopped coming around completely. I was okay with this as I had been able to manage alone as I was used to him not being around since her young age. I met a man and he’s been In my life for 8 months. We’re dating and taking about getting married and have plans of doing so as soon as we’re back from a family trip we planned. He’s a great father figure to my daughter. He’s the most kind soft hearted caring man I’ve ever met. He’s never ever thought of my daughter as anything else but his. I feel very blessed. Recently we found out I was pregnant. We’re super excited but I’m scared of what my family and friends might think bc we are not married yet and based on my kids Bio dad I get a little embarrassed bc I don’t want them thinking that my new boyfriend is gonna end up the same way. We talk about how we’re gonna tell our family after a couple more months but I’m still very nervous…I feel like maybe it’s built up trauma from everything I went through with my first babies Bio dad…and how everyone made me feel when I became a single mom…I don’t feel like this is fair to my partner. So I’m very nervous and scared..but I feel stupid??