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You guys know what an alpine coaster is? They are like a small roller coaster you find in the mountains. They are also called summer toboggans or mountain coasters and I think there’s some long German compound word they are called in parts of Europe. They are like a roller coaster, but with much smaller one or two person sleds you just sit on instead of multi-person cars you ride in, and instead of being built with like a scaffolding or a framework the tracks are just on the ground, using the elevation of the mountain. Basically it’s a coaster track on the side of a mountain where you ride a sled down.
They are pretty fun. Or at least I used to think so. They are more “personal” than roller coasters and although you get nowhere near the speed on them that you do on a good traditional roller coaster and they can’t do corkscrews or loops or anything like that the openness and simplicity of the ride gives an impression of a much greater speed. You’re just sitting there with nothing but a little plastic sled and the track between you and the ground as it goes zooming by. It’s like the difference between how fast a go-cart feels compared to how fast a sports car feels. You know the sports car goes faster but the open, simpleness of a go-cart feels a different kind of fast. There’s plenty of POV Youtube videos if you want to get the basic idea of what they are.
I used to love alpine coasters. Used to.
My family used to go to Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge and up and down the Smokey Mountains for vacations when I was a kid and they are common in that area and I’d always rode them every chance I got.
But as with so many things after I grew up and went to college they just became part of my childhood that slipped away. They aren’t exactly common once you get away from the mountains.
Until one cool spring afternoon in 2004. I was in my final year at college and I was driving back to campus in Tennessee after a short visit to my folks in North Carolina. It was only like a 4 or 5 hour drive via the most efficient route and I had no need to be back at campus early so instead of taking the freeway all the way I got off and took part of my trip through the mountains. The scenery was nicer and I admit I liked pushing my Camaro just a little faster than I should through the twisty mountain roads.
Just after lunchtime happened upon one of those little by-the-highway tourist towns deep somewhere in the Smoky Mountains near the Carolina/Tennessee border. Nothing fancy, a gas station/truck stop, a diner, a couple of places selling tourist merch nestled deep in the mountains. I pulled into the gas station. My tank was getting low and I needed to stretch my legs, maybe grab something to eat. It was still early and I only had another couple of hours. I could kill an hour or so and still make it back to campus at a decent hour.
I pulled into the gas station and was filling my tank when I happened to glance across the road and… well I’ll be damned. There it was. “The Blue Ridge Alpine Coaster.” Nestled on the side of the mountain was a building, a mockup of a red barn, where a single railed track that led up into the mountains, where it soon got lost in the greenery. Wooden hand painted standees of cartoon character bears dressed in stereotypical “Hillbilly” getup stood around, some of them holding signs showing the ride hours and ticket costs and other info. I had to admit, as silly as it was, it made me smile.I finished pumping my gas and, well, nostalgia is a helluva thing. I decided then and there I could waste a little time riding an Alpine Coaster again after all these years before getting back on the road.
I parked my car in a corner of the truck stop's parking lot, put my phone in the center console, this being the days before smart phones when people didn’t keep their phones with them 24/7 and I didn’t want my old Nokia brick phone to fall out during the ride, locked my car and walked across the mountain highway to the Alpine Coaster building.
Getting closer, the place was less inviting. The half hearted attempt at a whimsical faux-Americana kitsch was far less effective when it brushed up against the actual decaying, run down wooden building. Hell calling it a building was generous. It was a wood frame holding up a long roof that covered the area where you got on the sleds. The wood boards creaked under my footsteps.
The only real enclosed structure was a shack that held, what I assumed, was a ticket booth. A door on the side had both a single occupancy bathroom with an out of order sign on it. An old Pepsi machine buzzed and glowed next to it.
Still the place looked alive. Ahead of me a bored looking attendant was helping a mother and her young son into one of the sleds while in a bored monotone repeating the safety brief. A few people were waiting in line at the ticket booth. Up in the mountains the playful shouts of people on the ride echoed down. Fond memories of my own childhood rides flooded my mind.10 minutes and 15 dollars later I was settling into the hard plastic seat of a bright red sled sat atop a simple aluminum rail.
I couldn’t help but grin as the sled slowly climbed the track up the mountains, making click-clack ratcheting sounds that hit my nostalgia centers hard. I felt good. The air was cool and crisp and smelled of pine.Higher and higher in the mountains we went. I don’t know if this is my mind trying to make sense of it after the fact but when I remember these moments, the last good moments, I sometimes think I remember a very slight, very subtle pit of fear in my stomach. I honestly don’t know if I felt it at the time or not or it’s just how my mind tries to make sense of it looking back at.
But either way mostly I was enjoying myself. I smiled. I was a kid again. I could hear riders in front of me let out that initial yell of terrified glee you get at the first drop of any good ride.
It peaked. I glanced around. I could see for miles, rolling hills and mountains. I the sled tipped over and zoomed down the mountain and I let out the same happy yell I heard from the other passengers.The ride zoomed down the mountain, catching speed. The mountain forest floor zoomed past, only a few feet under me. Trees zoomed past. I gave out a happy whoop as the ride banked hard around a curve and then looped back under itself.Another dip, another curve. I closed my eyes, enjoying the feel of the G-forces pulling me every which way.
There was no one exact single moment where things started to go “wrong.” The ride kept going. And going. At this point the first creeping thought entered my head.
The ride… was still going.
It just started to hit me… this ride was going on for a really long time. I had taken a dozen rides on various coasters of this type before that day and they topped out at about 5 minutes or so, and that was the long ones. Longer than a traditional roller coaster but not that long. This one had been going on for what felt like 10, maybe even 15 minutes.
I looked back over my shoulder and could only see trees, moving too fast to really get a bearing on where I was at in relation to anything.
I wasn't exactly really worried yet. Okay so I had found a particularly long alpine coaster. At the time I wasn’t 100% wasn't sure they didn’t exist or anything like that. I was a little… unnerved but nothing was happening that was impossible. Yet.
I was trying to talk myself back into just enjoying the ride and stop overthinking it, and halfway succeeded, when out of nowhere I suddenly banked hard, the track jutting out almost over a sheer cliffside. I gripped the sled more tightly as I was whipped around. The ride then dipped hard and picked up speed, barreling down the side of the mountain.
I was pushed back against the seat by the force of the drop. Jesus I didn’t remember them being this rough. I was feeling slightly nauseous. And where had this elevation drop come from I wondered? I was still in the foothills and I didn’t remember seeing anything but gentle rolling hills and light drops from looking at the ride’s route earlier. How the ride had managed such a long, steep drop in this area I didn’t know. . For the first time I hoped that the ride would be over soon. I had no idea then how much I would want that same hope to be true so much more as time went on.
With a whiplash motion I was whipped forward and then back as the ride leveled out on flat ground again, but by this point I was going fast, too fast. My neck hurt from the mild whiplash and I felt sour in my throat and for a moment the contents of my stomach threatened to come back up. For the first, but hardly the last time the ride felt unsafe. Alpine Coasters are tame affairs, much slower and gentler than full on roller coasters but this thing was throwing me around like no thrill ride I had ever been on.
I looked around. I mean I wasn’t that deep into the woods. I should have been able to see a glimpse of something; the highway, the gas station, the tourist shops, the Alpine Coaster office, something, anything. But nothing. Just trees.
I forced back some panic for the first time. I closed my eyes and counted to ten. The ride zoomed along. I counted to 60. I counted to 60 again. And again. Okay this was getting uncomfortably harder and harder to explain.
Suddenly I noticed that up ahead the track seemed to just end, for one brief, terrible moment I thought the track just ended but I was wrong. Almost without warning the track dipped in an almost vertical drop. I almost screamed as I plummeted for 20, maybe 30 seconds before flattening out again.
By this point the voice in my head that was telling me something was wrong was louder and I could no longer tell myself it was wrong. This ride could not have been this long. I tried to make sense of it, wondering if somehow I had gotten diverted onto some kind of maintenance track or, hell for one brief irrational moment even entertaining the idea that I had wound up on an actual train track somehow. But that was absurd. The rail below me was not a train track, it was still just the simple, aluminum rail of an alpine coaster and there had been no diversions or junctions in the track. I was still on the ride, as insane as that was starting to feel. Had the ride somehow looped? Again after having the thought I immediately dismissed it as crazy. There’s no way I could have missed the ride building where I got on. And what kind of ride loops over and over?
The sled zoomed through the forest, oddly never seeming to lose speed despite the relatively flat grade of the track. I cursed myself for leaving my phone in the car and not wearing a watch. I don’t know exactly how long I had been on the ride at that point but it felt like I had been on the ride for a half hour, maybe more. But time is a funny thing when you’re in a situation you’ve never been in. Could have been more, could have been less, at that point.
My pride finally failed me. I started to scream for help. I screamed out that the ride was broken, to stop it, that I needed help. I did that for about ten minutes or so I think. The ride kept going. Mostly flat, level track with occasional mild dips and turns. But the simple length of the ride grew more and more unnerving and unexplainable.
I thought about just bailing out. But the ride, impossibly, was still not slowing down and chunks of mountain rock and thick tree trunks were all around me. Bailing out without risking smashing into a rock or a tree seemed impossible.
The ride kept going.
Up ahead the forest was clearing out some, I could see the forest brightening, more sunlight making it through the canopy.
I wasn’t prepared for what I saw.
The trees stopped and I had just enough time to take in a flat, open area of rock maybe 40, 50 yards at most before another sheer cliff. The tracks twisted and turned and then shot straight down. But that wasn’t the worst of it. For a moment, a very short moment, I had a clear view for miles and the landscape was, to be blunt, totally impossible. Any possibility that I had just stumbled on some incredibly long ride was blasted out of my head. Barren, volcanic looking rock stretched for miles. Jagged, black rocky outcroppings as far as the eye could see. I was in the goddamn Smoky Mountains. They don’t look like that.
I had a few moments for the terror of that view to settle in before the cart plunged into another horrifying drop. I gripped the handles of the cheap plastic sled until my knuckles turned white. The drop felt completely vertical, like I was falling at terminal velocity. I screamed. My stomach dropped and turned. I imagined the sled coming away from the track and me just plummeting screaming to my death on the rocks below. But somehow the ride still functioned. I closed my eyes tightly and just waited for whatever was going to happen. Eventually after several what felt like a full minute of steep plunging the track again leveled out, and I opened my eyes to see myself moving at breakneck speed over that black, rocky landscape.
Now that I was moving on a more or less flat horizontal track again I took a few deep breaths. I looked over the edge of the track. Nothing but that black, jagged rock, almost looking like obsidian, zooming past. I had no idea how fast the sled was moving now. Fast. Faster than a gravity powered sled should be moving. And the track was higher off the ground now. Alpine slides usually stick pretty close to the ground, but I was 20 feet or so in the air, the track suspended in the air, a simple metal tube tower like a power pylon every few yards.
Without any immediate threat and the sled moving fast but steadily and level I was able to think about my situation again, for all the good that did me. Ahead of me the track just continued to the horizon, nothing but the same rocky landscape as far as I could see. I craned my neck to look back over my shoulder and looked back behind me and it looked the same. Even the mountains were but distant specs on the horizon behind me.
This was insane. There’s not a giant seemingly endless field of black jagged rock in the goddamn Smoky Mountains. There’s no cliff faces tall and steep enough for a multi-minute vertical drop. And alpine coasters were small affairs, not major engineering projects that span miles with pylons and vertical tracks. It made no sense.
Sadly it wasn’t going to start making any more sense anytime soon.
The ride kept going.
I was on this rocky landscape for several hours. I feel comfortable saying this because I could actually notice the sun getting lower in the sky. And the sled wasn’t slowing down despite the grade of the track being flat. I was getting cramped from sitting and stretched my legs and twisted my back as best I could. Didn’t do much help. My eyes were starting to get irritated from the constant wind in them. Worst of all it was starting to get chilly. I only had on a light jacket, a windbreaker, just something to keep the breeze off me, no real insulation. I was cold, my joints were stiff, I was hungry and thirsty. My eyes watered and my throat was so dry it was sore.
But none of that was as bad as just how little sense this all made. There’s nothing like this place anywhere near the Smoky Mountains. This was like some volcanic rock landscape. The more I thought about it the less sense it made.
The ride kept going.
My mind didn’t even try to process this. Whatever I was experiencing simply couldn’t be possible. I was crazy. I was dreaming. The CIA had kidnapped me and dosed me with some new version of LSD and I was in a straightjacket in a padded room at Area 51.
The sled kept zooming along as the sky turned to dusk. Soon the bridge disappeared from my view and I continued on along the endless, rocky, featureless landscape.
I sat back against the sled, mentally and physically numb. I was exhausted. I was thirsty. I was cramping up. I was hungry. I had to pee. I held it for as long as I could, then had no choice but just wet myself. I cried until I had no more tears left. Then I just sat there.
The ride kept going.
By the time the sun dipped below the horizon my throat felt like sandpaper. I dug around in my jacket pockets hoping to find a stick of gum or piece of candy. Nothing. I checked again, having nothing else to do. Under a crumpled store receipt in the inner pocket of my jacket was a single old, forgotten cough drop. I unwrapped it from the paper and popped it in my mouth. Saliva flooded back into my mouth and I was overwhelmed by the methanol and medicine taste. It was something at least, although I knew it would be a brief and temporary fix at best.
I felt my eyes get heavy. It was getting colder. That mountain cold. That deep cold the mountains have even into the early spring when the sun goes down. That kind that just pulls the heat right out of you. I shivered. A terrible, horrible certainty came to me. I would ride until I passed out from exhaustion or the hypothermia set in. My body would tumble off the sled to fall and skip across the rocky ground like a stone skipping across a lake, my bones breaking as I tumbled until my body finally came to a stop. If I was lucky I would be killed and not have to lie for days, broken and bruised, on the ground until death took me.
The ride kept going. The ride kept going. The fucking ride kept going.
“Fuck you” I said to the ride, my voice a horse whisper. I pulled my jacket closer around me, for all the good it did. The cold wind was slowly but surely pulling my body heat away. My shivering got worse, crossing the line from a simple normal shiver into those deep, almost violent full body ones.. I wasn’t anything you could call an experienced outdoorsman, but I knew enough to know that wasn’t a good sign.
It was getting dark. There was a full moon at least so I wasn’t totally in the dark.
About then I noticed something. The landscape, what little I could see in the fading light, was changing. It was smoothing out, becoming less rocky and craggy. Up ahead an odd, shimmering light was starting to appear on the ground.
I was over it before I even realized what it was. The tracks were going over a smooth surface.
Water. It was a lake. The odd lights I had seen were the moon, reflected in ripples on the lake.
Within minutes I was out of the view of the land. After the nearly endless rocky landscape and everything else I had seen, it scared me how little I was shocked. I didn’t like how mentally numb I was getting. I leaned over. There was enough moonlight to see the water, 15 or 20 feet below the track. The pylons holding up the track went into the water, the light wasn’t good enough to even make a guess at how far they went down or how deep the water was.I leaned back in the sled. My eyes were red and bloodshot from the constant wind. I closed them. This was a mistake.I jerked awake. I don’t know if I dozed off for a split second or an hour. My weight had shifted and I caught myself as my center of gravity was in danger of sending me off the sled and into the water.
I screamed in anger. A deep primal scream. I hurt so bad. My joints felt like they were full of glass. My limbs were full of pins and needles. I glanced over at the water. For the first time on the very edges of my brain a tiny voice started to speak up, telling me that I could be all over if I just jumped. I shut the voice up, but it scared me still.
I sat there as the ride went on. It felt like hours. Eventually the lake ended in a rocky shore line. The damned ride. There was no safe place to bail out. If the ride slowed down, it was high in the air, if it moved toward the ground it sped up. Sharp rocks, big trees, nothing you could safely bail out into.
I kept having to force myself awake. I kept dozing off. Once I felt myself falling asleep and drove a vicious uppercut into my own nose to stave it off.
I seriously started to think about how much longer I could hang on. The voice came back again. This time I didn’t shut it up. I wasn’t admitting it to myself yet, but I was starting to think about the best way to land that would end it quickly if I needed to.
Something was ahead. The track seemed to dip into the ground. I was too tired, too beaten to even get scared. I was just resigned to whatever happened at this point.
With little warning the track took my sled into a tunnel in the ground. Everything went completely pitch black. After several moments even the dim moonlight was gone.
This was the worst part. The creepy forest, the immense rocky landscape, the eerie lake… those were bad. But this was just nothing. Nothing to look at, nothing to hear, nothing for reference or sense of where I was going. The walls of the tunnel felt like they were inches from me in every direction. The air felt thick, like there wasn’t enough oxygen.
With every moment I was in that tunnel I lost a little more hope. After a long, long time I made a decision. When I got out of this tunnel, I would jump. I didn’t care anymore. Hopefully there would be a spot where I could be certain the fall would instantly kill me. I was done. The ride had beaten me. I sat there, waiting for a chance to end this on my terms. That was all I had left.
Eventually up ahead, a tiny speck of light appeared. I gathered my strength, ready to end it. I sat up, getting my legs under me so I could jump as soon as we were clear. The sled burst out of the tunnel. The dim light of the full moon was enough to be momentarily blinding after the pitch black of the tunnel.. I gave my eyes a moment to adjust.
I was back in a normal looking Appalachian forest. Rolling hills, green trees. The air smelled of pine again. I heard an owl hoot off somewhere.
Slowly I lowered myself back into a setting position, in shock. At first I refused to believe it but the ride was slowing down. I held still, making sure my mind wasn’t playing tricks on me, but no, the cheap plastic sled that had been my world for what felt like an eternity was slowing down.
Up ahead, a structure was visible, peeking out from among the trees in the dim lighting as the sled moved down the track.
It was the Alpine Slide building. The crappy fake red barn where I had boarded this cursed ride so long ago. I blinked and rubbed my eyes, sure it was either my mind or the cursed ride playing tricks with me. But the building stayed there.
It grew closer and closer. The track leveled completely out. The sled slowed down more. Before I had the time to really come to terms with it I arrived back at the building.
The sled slowed to a stop, gently pumping against another sled parked on the track. I sat there for a few moments, gasping in great big gulping fear breaths, trying to assure myself the ride didn’t have one last trick of its sleeve.
I looked around. The place was empty, deserted. The overhead lights were still on and the old Pepsi machine still glowed and buzzed, but the ticket booth was dark and empty, a metal gate pulled down over the ticket window.
Suddenly it hit me that I was free and I practically leapt out of the sled and onto the platform. I immediately collapsed. My legs were jelly and my head was spinning. I tried to stand up again and doubled over, dry heaving. Have you ever been out on a boat for a day and have that weird reverse motion sickness when you’re back on solid land? It was like that times a hundred. My inner ear was literally pounding, all the motion had really done a number on it.
I laid there for a few moments and eventually forced myself to stand up on my two wobbling legs. I looked around, a horrible certainty creeping into my mind that there would be no exit, no way off the platform but to my relief an exit turnstyle, one of those full height ones, was set into the fence that surrounded the ride property.
I went through it and found myself back on the main road. The truckstop was still there, still open but far less busy. My car sat in the same corner of the parking lot I had left it.
I allowed myself one look back, just one quick one. The metal skeleton of the Alpine Slide track sat there, dark and quiet but otherwise normal.
I stumbled-ran back to my car, dug the keys out of my pocket, and collapsed inside. When the door shut I let out a primal scream, the tons of fear and confusion and anger all fusing into a single, raw emotion. I screamed again and again.
After a few moments I felt like I was emotionally at least back to a place where I could act, although I wasn’t sure yet what to do next. Not really knowing what to do I cranked the car. The A/C had been on low when I shut off the car and it came roaring back to life and cold air blowing on me almost sent me back into a full on panic attack. I fumbled with the climate controls until the air stopped blowing directly on me, then calmed down enough to turn the heat on, helping to get the chill out of my bones. There was a half full bottle of water in the center console cup holder and I grabbed it and chugged it. Nothing ever tasted as good before or sense as that few ounces of water.
That was when I noticed the clock on the radio head unit. It was 4:17 in the morning. It had been about one, one thirty or so in the afternoon when I got on the accursed ride.
Over 15 hours. I had been on the goddamn ride for over 15 hours. Over half a day.
I just sat there. Warming up. Calming down. I was exhausted. I was dehydrated. I can’t even describe how my head felt. I probably had at least a minor case of hypothermia. I thought about going into the gas station and asking for help but what would I even say, and more than anything I just wanted to get away from this place. And I just wanted to get away. I wanted to be nowhere near that damn ride.
I put the Camaro in gear and pulled into the street and in panic I immediately slammed on the brakes. I was lucky there was no traffic on the road at that moment. The feeling of accelerating to just normal surface street speeds made me sick to my stomach. I gathered myself and very slowly accelerated the car I usually treated with a very heavy foot up to 30 miles an hour. Every time I tried to accelerate at a pace faster than “Old Lady Going to Church, Uphill” I would have a panic attack. I was okay once I was up to speed, but accelerating freaked me out after being on that ride.
I drove about 30 minutes, putting some arbitrary amount of distance between myself and the coaster. Eventually I made it back to where the twisty mountain road met back up with a major road that would eventually meet back up with the highway. After a few more minutes of driving I saw the onramp for the highway. There was one of those big truckstop travel plazas and pulled in, parking right up at the door. I smelled like pee and I can only imagine how I looked, but I didn’t care.
I kept a couple of emergency 20s in the back of my wallet and spent it on the biggest bottle of water the store had, an overpriced bottle of eye drops, and a huge travel mug of coffee. The clerk looked at me as if he was expecting me to either drop dead or rob him the entire time.
Back in my car I downed the coffee. I put a few eye drops in each of my eyes and sat there as the caffeine took effect until I felt like I could make it back to my apartment. The sun was just coming up when I finally pulled out of the truck stop and got on the freeway. I slowly, very slowly, accelerated up to highway speed, put the Camaro in cruise control, and let the miles start to drift away. I turned on the radio, I needed to hear human voices. Every time my mind went back to what had just happened I turned the radio up louder, eventually drowning it out with painful levels of rock music. I wasn’t ready to think about it yet. Yes looking back I know I was just in denial. I finally made it back to the crappy little apartment I had off campus, a little two story walk up studio. I let myself in and collapsed on the cheap couch. I was asleep before I even had the time to decide whether or not to do anything else. I woke up later that afternoon. I took a shower and ate a meal and didn’t think about the ride. I washed the pee stained filthy clothes I had been wearing and didn’t think about the ride. I went back to class and didn’t think about the ride. Every time I thought about the ride I forced it out of my head. I’m sure this wasn’t the most mentally healthy thing to do but what can you say?
I didn’t forget about it, don’t be silly. This isn’t the kind of thing you forget. One day while looking up something else in the university’s library my curiosity got the better of me and I looked up the Alpine Slide. No website but a few Google Map and Yelp mentions. None of them mentioned anything weird, certainly nothing even remotely like what I experienced. Near as I can tell it closed sometimes in the winter of 2012.
Life went on. I mean, that’s what it does. The next day was a little better. And the day after that a little better. And the day after that a little better still. I met a nice girl. Graduated. Got married. Got a nice house in the suburbs. Got a dog. Had a daughter. Spent a lot of time happy and not thinking about being trapped on an endless alpine coaster.And that was my life for many, many years after that.
Until a few weeks back when as a very different person I found myself driving a boring and safe mid sized family SUV through those same mountains. My wife Carol, 5 months pregnant, sat in the passenger seat, our 6 year old daughter Emily in a booster seat in the back, and Max our mixed breed mutt next to her. It had been a nice pleasant trip, driving back from visiting her folks.
I hadn’t thought about that fucking ride in so long I barely registered that I was in the same general area until it was too late. Suddenly I realized that little mountain tourist trap town was only a few minutes down the road. I swallowed hard and gripped the steering wheel hard. Carol was looking out the window at the scenery and Emily was deep into some kid’s Youtube video on an iPad. I forced myself to keep my breath steady as we rounded the corner.The town was still there, sorta. Time had not been kind to it. The gas station was still there, at some point it had been bought out by Shell. The tourist trap shops were still there. One of them was now a vape shop. The diner was closed, the building looking like it sat unused for a long time.
But of course that’s not what I cared about. A looked over at the site where the Alpine Coaster once stood. It was gone. The kitschy fake barn was gone. The site was just a bare concrete slab with a chainlink fence around it. Faded “no trespassing” and “for sale” signs hung off the fence. A pile of old, decaying lumber that might have once long ago been part of the structure covered part of the old lot. No sign of the track remained outside of some old concrete support posts dotting the side of the mountain.
I exhaled out a breath I hadn’t even realized I had been holding in. Soon the little town disappeared in my rear view mirror.
About a half hour later we stopped for gas. I pulled up to a gas pump across from a massive motorhome. Max stuck his head out the window and started barking at a little white dog, a toy breed of some kind, in the window of the motorhome. Carol and Emily immediately headed into the store to restock on snacks while I fueled up.
I stood there, a half smile on my lips as Max barked and wagged his tail in an attempt to attract the attention of the other dog while I filled up the tank, said dog doing an admirable job of ignoring him.
Right about the time I finished fueling up and cleaning the bugs off the windshield Carol returned from inside the store, Emily in tow, arms filled with two full sized bags of Salt and Vinegar Potato Chips and what looked to be a half dozen individually wrapped pickles.
I raised an eyebrow at the collection of food but knew better than to question a pregnant woman's snack choices.
“Should we take Max for a quick walk?” Carol asked. The travel plaza had a nice little gated dog walking area off to the side.
“Yeah probably not a bad idea, he’s been cooped up in the car for a few hours.” I said. Max, upon hearing his name and the word “walk” , forgot about the other dog and upgraded from wagging his tail to wagging his entire body while making whining sounds and staring right at me.
About this time I became half aware that the big motor home next to us was pulling away. I didn’t think much of it, outside of doing a quick automatic mental check to make sure Emily was well clear of the moving vehicle, but she was safely between me and our SUV, well out of the way.
But that was when Emily looked behind me and cheerfully yelled “Daddy look a roller coaster! Can I ride the coaster?”
It’s cliche as fuck I know but my blood went cold.
I turned around slowly, certain in my knowledge that terrible old decrepit Alpine Coaster would be there, having just popped into existence to trap me again.
That.. is not what I saw. Sure enough there was a coaster there, one I hadn’t noticed earlier because it had mostly been blocked by the motor home, but there it was. It was even an Alpine Coaster.
But it was not the same coaster I had encountered those years ago. That was immediately obvious. It was a small but modern and newish looking setup with neon lights and a bunch of people. There was an actual building where you bought tickets and a little snack stand.
“Daddy! Can we go on the coaster!” Emily asked again.
My mouth made motions but no words came out. I glanced over at Carol, hoping she’d say we didn’t have time but to my horror she smiled and said “You know what? That does sound like fun. Daddy will take you while I take Max for a walk.”
My mind raced, trying to think of a way to get out of it. But Emily was already dragging me across the parking lot to the entrance.
I patted my pocket, making sure my phone was in it. Every fiber of my being was screaming to run away. I slept walked through the line and the ticket booth while Emily bounced happily.
We got into a two seat plastic sled. This one was actually a lot nicer than the one my mind wouldn’t stop thinking about. It had two nice cushioned seats, big grab handles, even a nice rollbar.
The sled started up the track. I fought back the panic. I swerved my head around, keeping the building in my view. I was terrified of losing sight of it. We made it to the top and Emily did a happy squeal as we started down the side of the mountain.
My heart raced. Any second, any second my mind told me we’d lose sight of the building and then the ride would never end. The ride sped down the mountain. My mind tortured me with thoughts of not only going through it again, but seeing Emily go through it. The ride went around a big, banking turn. Emily kept shouting happily. How long before Carol reported us missing I wondered? Could I keep Emily calm? What if it lasted even longer this time? What if this time it never ended?
And then we were back at the start of the ride. The same attendant who had helped us into the sled was helping Emily out. I stepped out. The attendant gave me a brief look but said nothing. I guess I looked a little wild eyed.
I was fine. Emily was fine. It had been a perfectly normal, fun ride.
“That was fun Daddy! Thank you!” Emily said. I forced a smile back. “It was fun.” I responded, hoping like I sounded like I meant it.
I took Emily’s hand and we walked back to the car. Max saw us coming and barked happily. Carol looked up from the pint of Ben and Jerry’s she had somehow acquired and added to her snack collection while we were gone and smiled at us.
“Did you have fun?” she asked.
“It was so fun Mommy!” Emily said.
Carol smiled down at her, but then looked at me and frowned. “Are you okay?” Carol could read my face a lot better than the attendant could. “You’re pale.”
I smiled and this time the smile felt real. “Ya know what. Yeah, I think I am okay.”
Carol looked a little puzzled, but didn’t press it. We loaded Emily back in her booster seat, stopped Max from trying desperately to eat half a discarded gas station hot dog off the ground and got him back in the car. Carol and her small collection of snack food took her place in the passenger seat and I got in the driver's seat.I smiled. I cranked the car. I put it in gear. I pulled out of the gas station and back on the road, this time accelerating just a little faster than I had in years.

Hi everyone, I own a Topo Designs 40L Global Travel bag that I use for 1 week or more trips. But I’m in the market for a smaller bag for overnight to 3-5 day trips. I’ve fallen a little in love with the look of the Bellroy Venture Ready 26L and they have the 1st gen on sale in Navy for $155 (2nd gen is $259 and the only difference is a luggage pass through that I won’t use and an AirTag hidden pocket. I found no other discernible differences in structure size or function).
For context, I do tend to overpack a bit (but I’m working on it, lol) and mainly only travel to warm weather places.
A sample of what my current 3-5 day list looks like:
Wear on plane: Patagonia Capilene Cool Daily Tee, Public Rec Flex shorts, Bombas No Show merino socks, Adidas Climacool mesh boxers, Adidas tank undershirt, Ridge Merino Solstice sun hoodie, Kizik Athens, Mission baseball cap.
Need to pack:
2 Patagonia Capilene Cool Daily tees, 2 Public Rec Go To tee, 1 Public Rec Elevate tee, 1 Public Rec Go To polo shirt.
1 Public Rec Flex shorts, 1 Patagonia Stretch Wavefarer shorts, 1 Western Rise Evo shorts, 1 Western Rise Evo 2.0 pants, 1 Arctic Cool mesh shorts. The Flex and Wavefarer shorts double as swimsuits, and the mesh shorts would just be pajama/lounge shorts.
Fairly certain I can get the tops and bottoms in my 11x11 compression packing cube.
5 Adidas Climacool mesh boxer briefs, 3 Adidas tank undershirts, 3 Bombas No Show merino socks, 2 Mission baseball caps. I always wear a hat and these pack rather easily as they’re unstructured. Also, I wear mesh boxers as a liner while swimming in hybrid shorts so I take more than the number of days.
The underwear, socks and hats should all fit in my 11x7.5 compression packing cubes.
So those two cubes stacked on top of one another are 18.5” in height and 11” in width. The Bellroy is 19.6” tall and 13” wide, so should be good there.
Other things I need to fit in the main bucket compartment would be my Olukai Ohana’s (size 11th pack pretty thin), Matador Refraction Packable Sling (2.5x7x2” would probably go in the clamshell slash pocket), and my 10x7x3” hanging toiletry kit (which may fit in the larger mesh pocket on the clamshell).
My iPad Air 11” would go in the laptop pocket in its keyboard case and my Kindle would go in the tablet pocket.
I would use the top outside tech pocket for my 3-in-1 MagSafe charger, AirPod Pro 2’s, 2 USB-C cables, dual plug brick, and my Nitecore 10k battery pack.
The hidden side stash pocket is where my clear liquids bag would go. And then a 21oz Hydroflask in the water bottle pocket.
I would attach my Matador speed stash for my iPhone and sunglasses.
https://bellroy.com/products/venture-ready-pack?color=nightsky&material=baida_ripstop&size=26l
So two questions…do you think this is all possible to fit in the Bellroy and do any of you own one who can give me an actual unpaid for review?
Thanks for any help, advice, opinions or sarcastic comments!

I'm 21 years old 5ft 7 And weigh 57kg.
I will like U to go into detail for each feat I mention but in 2 ways. The first is in comparison to any other 5ft 7 57kg 21 year and then second would be compared to the average 'height and weight' 21 year old.
I was really skinny (I don't have pics) and decided to try pushups. I could only do 5. I was told that although I'm very skinny. For someone who never trained or worked let alone worked out, alot people can't even do more than 1 and 5 was relatively impressive..for 1 week every day i practised doing as many pushups as i could do. At the end of the week I realised I could do 10 pushups to failure. I then decided no matter what I will do 10 pushups every day for the next 30 days. By the end of the month I had a pb of 20 pushups (a 5 seconds rest for repositioning after 10 pushups, then banging out last 10 before failure).in a row. This brought me from an original 56.6 to 57kg. I then discovered grip strength adjustable spring loaded tools and.realised I could do 60ibs in each hand. After 7 days I got up to 75 where I peaked for a few weeks. After a month I had finally decided to go to the gym feeling relatively strong for my size.
I done many arm chest back exercises with only using like 10-15kg for each exercise (not bench squat or deadlift) for 1 week and.felt really strong. I was happy that I could do that for 12 reps and.thn I thought screw it I'm gonna try my hardest I have a big temper and I feel 5c stronger in those moments and decided to put that anger into training.
Instantly the next day following the 1st week of gym training with 10-15kg weights. I ended up finding out I could bench 60kg 1-3 times (depending wether I was just going to falier or seeing what I can lift. 40kg 12 reps 3 sets now and 20 pushups not much trouble. I can do 5 chin ups compared to none at beginning. Also even though I couldn't grip it properly I used a digital dynomometre and.scores 40kg in 1 hand and 58 in both even though I couldn't grip it and it kept slipping out.
I'm just wandering how I fair with only a week gym training with a month prep of pushups for 30days. Essentially how do I fair for someone my size. Does the feats impressive compared to the average 21 year old.
Sorry for the long message I don't usually do these.
Thank you

I've just finished a full rewatch of the Viz dub including the movies and specials, having watched a mix of the OG English dub + some of the sub as a child, but never in order all the way through. Here is my review no one asked for:
Classic: Great intro to the characters, loved it when the plot was somewhat moving, and the relationship between the guardians was really well developed. I found the Jadeite/Nephrite arcs really dragged at points, however once the Rainbow Crystal arc rolled around things really get going. I wish we could have seen a bit more flirtation/romance between Mamoru and Usagi. The finale was simply stunning and emotional, bringing me to tears.
Favourite filler episode: "Love and Chased: Luna's Worst Day Ever"
Favourite plot episode: "The Shining Silver Crystal: The Moon Princess Appears"
Special mention: "Usagi's Eternal Wish: A Brand New Life"
Sailor Moon R: I quite enjoyed the Makai Tree arc, however as above I found it a bit of a missed opportunity with Mamoru/Usagi and romance. Once again, the beginning of the season was overall a bit rough. And Chibiusa... while her behaviour was understandable it wasn't enjoyable to watch. And the less said about the break-up arc the better. The Black Moon Clan were pretty cool though, and Chibiusa definitely improved as the season went on.
Favourite filler episode: "Venus Minako's Nurse Mayhem"
Favourite plot episode: "Saphir Dies: Wiseman's Trap"
Special mention: "Usagi's Crisis: The Tiara Stops Working"
Sailor Moon S: I mean what can I say that hasn't been said before? The peak of the series - from the first episode you feel the raised stakes and improved production values. The Outer Senshi steal every scene they're in, the pure heart crystals format adds an emotional character driven layer to even the monster of the week episodes. The Death-Busters make hilarious but compelling villains, and the Hotaru arc is utterly captivating. Chibiusa is also handled far better - her friendship with Hotaru is her at her best.
Best filler episode: "Coldhearted Uranus: Makoto in Danger"
Best plot episode: "The Shining Shooting Star: Saturn and the Messiah"
Special mention: "The Death of Uranus and Neptune: The Talismans Appear"
Sailor Moon SuperS: Now I heard everyone hates this one, and honestly it wasn't as bad as I expected. The animation and music are gorgeous, and the slice of life comedic episodes are mostly done really well. I also love the villains, especially Fish's Eye. However I do find the focus on Chibiusa grating at times (although still better than R!) and Pegasus/Helios... eh. The worst crime for me is no Outers - why?? I really felt their absence, and I think having Hotaru aroudn could have made Chibiusa stuff a bit more compelling. Overall I enjoyed this season for what it was, but it did drag at points.
Best filler episode: "Storm of Love: Minako's Grand Two-Timing Plan"
Best plot episode: "Dreams Forever: Fill the Heavens with Light"
Special mention: "Shadow of Evil: The Trio's Last Chance"
Sailor Moon Stars: Ok, so this one was back with a bang - the Outers are back, and the stakes are higher than ever. The Nehelenia arc in this season is pretty much peak Sailor moon. Then the Galaxia arc - I enjoyed the Starlights (well I mostly enjoyed Seiya) and it was interesting to add a different dynamic to the group. Sailor Aluminium Siren and Crow were two of my overall favs, and I liked that we were back to dramatic high stakes like in S. The end was beautiful, and I may have shed a tear.
Best filler episode: "A Night Alone Together: Usagi in Danger"
Best plot episode: "Usagi's Love: The Moonlight Illuminates the Galaxy"
Special mention: "Night of Destiny: The Sailor Guardians' Ordeals"
I loved all of the movies and specials - the R movie and Ami's First Love are the peak of the entire series animation wise for me.
My rankings of the seasons: 1. S 2. Stars 3. Classic 4. SuperS 5. R
My rankings of the movies: 1. R 2. S 3. SuperS
So those are my thoughts! Don't know what I'm going to do with myself now - read the manga or watch Crystal?! Would love to hear all of your thoughts on the series too :)

Author note: The Cryopod to Hell is a Reddit-exclusive story with over three years of editing and refining. As of this post, the total rewrite is 2,182,000+ words long! For more information, check out the link below:
What is the Cryopod to Hell?
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...................................
(Previous Part)
(Part 001)
"Hell yeah, I wanna go exploring." Jason says to Calanthra with a smile. "How do we navigate around Ripspace though? Traveling to other galaxies is going to take billions of years, right? Surely, there's a shortcut."
"Ripspace is not as it seems." Calanthra explains, gesturing grandly to the epic sight before them. "It is a connection between the past and the present; the near and far. The further away or the further back you want to travel, the higher the price you will have to pay."
Jason's smile vanishes. "Wait... you can use Ripspace to travel back in time?!"
"No." Calanthra clarifies. "Time is linear. We cannot travel through it. Some can slow it down or speed it up. A rare few can even pause it for a short while. But moving forward and backward is impossible. Countless have attempted to do so over the eons, but all have failed."
She looks at Jason meaningfully. "Many Rulers would wipe out galaxies if it might let them obtain such a power. The fact they still haven't proves it is impossible."
Jason nods slowly. "I won't lie. I have a lot of regrets. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and save my daughter from dying."
"Everyone has regrets." Calanthra muses, looking off into the distance. "I have plenty, myself. But it's better this way. There would be pandemonium if time travel ever became possible."
She pauses before continuing with her explanation. "While we cannot go back in time, we can look back into time. Pinpointing exact moments in history is difficult, to say the least, but it is possible to use Ripspace to search for key moments in intergalactic history."
"So it's like a massive seer-stone." Jason muses aloud. "But wait, didn't you imply earlier that you used Ripspace to travel to the Milky Way from Andromeda? How does it allow you to jump between galaxies? Are other species using Ripspace for intergalactic travel?"
"You can indeed use Ripspace to travel to distant reaches of space." Calanthra explains. "But... you have to pay a certain price. Akasha's Barriers still protect every galaxy. Cosmics cannot travel between them easily. Mortals can, but the price we must pay is unimaginably steep. That is also the reason my mother perished not long after arriving in the Milky Way and giving birth to me."
The Fairy Monarch sighs softly.
"My people used the power of Ripspace to travel to several other galaxies. We were fortunate that the Creator had died, allowing us to take up residence here in secret, but the Angels, Titans, and Dragons were still a threat we could not overlook. Later, the Volgrim rose up too, and that was something that worried us for a while. Particularly when their Sentinels began to rapaciously erase the lives of innumerable Sentients."
She waves her hand. "Ultimately, very few galaxies didn't have a Ruler in power. Traveling to one that did meant flipping a coin and praying our people could avoid their gaze. Sadly, time has shown me that we were likely unsuccessful. I have lost contact with all my sisters across the cosmos."
The image of innumerable galaxies floating in the distance changes before Jason's eyes. Calanthra manipulates some unseen power, causing herself and Jason to suddenly materialize directly in front of a beautiful spiral galaxy.
"This is our Milky Way." Calanthra explains, waving her hand to conjure another, far bigger galaxy beside it. "And this is Andromeda."
"Is it just me or does Andromeda seem... brighter?" Jason asks.
"Andromeda contains far more interstellar particles, cosmic energy, and latent magical power than the Milky Way." Calanthra says. "Of course, in the ancient past, it had even more than it does now, but such is the way of entropy and Chaos."
Jason nods. "How exactly do galaxies lose power over time? Doesn't this feel self-defeating in a way?"
"Every Ruler enters the Unending War with a strategy." Calanthra says, motioning with her hands to disperse the galaxies and reveal images of ghostly creatures, some standing on two legs, some on four, and plenty that appear as mere blobs of energy. "I cannot pretend to know the thoughts of such high and mighty beings, especially as I am a mere mortal myself. Even so, I can definitively state that there are Rulers who seek to put as much galactic energy into their initial creations as possible, while others wish to adopt a more energy-efficient growth-model."
She pokes her finger against Jason's chest. "Take the angels and humans, for instance. The Creator poured the vast majority of his power into creating a galaxy full of Apex Cosmics. At their peak, the angels as a whole commanded enough power to flatten other galaxies. But what did they do instead? They fought with one another, killing themselves due to sheer boredom, if not outright ego."
"I see." Jason says, brushing Calanthra's finger away. "So the Creator dumped all the Milky Way's energy into the angels. I take it this is uncommon among Rulers?"
"Of course. It's a wasteful strategy and usually loses Rulers the War for that Eternity." Calanthra says dismissively. "The Timeless used a different strategy. She created the fairies as mere mortals that evolved over time, gaining greater and greater power through their own efforts. This meant that instead of devouring Andromeda's abundant Cosmic energy, they could slowly sap off its excess over time. For you see, the more energy a galaxy has, the more it can produce. If you ration it long enough, you can reap more of it across the duration of an Eternity."
"That makes sense." Jason concludes. "It's like a Rush build in an RTS versus an Economy build. You sacrifice long-term gains in exchange for short-term power. The problem is, with Akasha's Barriers preventing Rulers from attacking their enemies straight away, a Rush build is dumb because you're just wasting your resources and sacrificing Cosmic energy when you'll actually need it."
Calanthra blinks twice. She looks at Jason with a strange expression, then turns away for a moment, trying to understand the strange terms he's used. They mostly make sense, but some of them are a little...
She shakes her head and returns to the topic at hand. "Right. Rush strategy versus Economy. Of... course. Well, in any case, there is one advantage toward the first strategy. If you drain all the energy from your galaxy, it becomes less appealing for other Rulers to attack. Because Andromeda was so large and still filled with Cosmic power even billions of years after the Expansion Era, it stoked the hunger of the Dark Ones. Meanwhile, the Milky Way only needs to deal with the Plague, which is threatening for mortals, but manageable for Cosmics. In that respect, we've gotten off much luckier."
"I get the bigger picture now." Jason says with a nod. He turns to look back at the cosmos before him. "So, what about all this? Are we gonna go exploring, or what?"
"In order to explore the universe presented here, we would need to make sacrifices we cannot afford. I think you would find the price most disagreeable. But there is something we can explore freely..."
She waves her hand, and instantly, the brilliant and beautiful cosmic view of the universe vanishes.
In its place, Jason and Calanthra suddenly appear inside a dead, barren wasteland. Brown and grey dirt rises up in huge dunes stretching off into the distance. Fallen towers made of gold and stone lay on their sides, or stick into the ground, buried nearly up to their tops as they point diagonally toward the sky.
And speaking of the sky, it glows faintly grey, as if some weak, pale imitation of a star were trying to shine through a thin atmosphere clouded by dust and grime. The very air itself smells of sulfur and toxins, making Jason's nose curl up when he takes a breath.
"Ugh... what the hell? Where are we now?" Jason asks, as he turns and looks around at the dead world surrounding him.
"An Ancient Domain." Calanthra says softly. "A remnant of a dead universe. All life stripped away. All hope lost. Septillions of different Sentient species, gone. Their mortals, their Cosmics, reduced to dust by the Contraction."
The Wordsmith frowns. "This Ancient Domain represents a dead universe? But how can that be possible? If the Heat Death played out and all the galaxies faded to cosmic dust, then there already wouldn't be anything left. And then, if the entire universe collapsed into a singularity before exploding again, there definitely wouldn't be anything left behind resembling physical matter."
"You perceive reality through just three dimensions." Calanthra intones. "Time and space can be considered two dimensions. Cosmic Power is another dimension. I must admit I do not understand how Ancient Domains have continued to exist across countless Eternities, and I don't know how they retain a vaguely familiar form... but I can assure you that in spite of bending logic itself, they do exist and they can provide tangible benefits to those dedicated to exploring them."
"You've been exploring them, then?" Jason asks, turning away from the dead world to scrutinize Calanthra's phantasmal image.
"Me, a little. But often, I dispatch my descendants to scour these Ancient Domains for things of value. It may surprise you, but there are powerful artifacts, vengeful spirits, and all manner of other inter-dimensional horrors lurking within these so-called dead-lands."
Calanthra pauses. She shifts her posture to look at Jason deeply.
"And that is why I've brought you here, Jason. It's time for me to get down to the crux of the matter and breach the subject that I find most important."
He nods. "I'm listening."
"It's like this." Calanthra explains. "The Ancient Domains are unfathomably broad. Think of how large a universe is. Think of how many universes have existed. Think of how much space my people have yet to explore."
She pauses.
"The gains we have received have made my people stronger than you would expect. Among those gains are Yredelemnul's Eye and other leftover remnants of power that many dead ancient Rulers lost when their Existences became forfeit. While their tangible Existences may have perished, their spirits sometimes live on in these broad, unending dead universes..."
"That's why you approached me." Jason says, while crossing his arms and leaning on the ball of his heel. "You said you wanted an alliance with humanity. You... want humans to help you explore the Ancient Domains?"
"Trust is hard to come by among mortals, Cosmics, and Rulers." Calanthra says simply. "I never would have considered allying with the humans before, but you have shown me the broadness of your mind during the debate against your clone and the commander of your military. To some, you certainly appear naive, but to me I see an opportunity I would be foolish to ignore."
She continues. "The Fairies cannot reproduce efficiently. Every fairy we send into the Ancient Domain is one less fairy we have among our Empire. We already have a difficult time replenishing our numbers through the remaining Male Fairies, but do you think it is easy for us to reproduce with other species?"
Jason slowly shakes his head. "Blinker and Kar's children were all crocodiles, not fairies. From that, I can only imagine that most of the time, your mating attempts do not create more of yourselves, but instead more non-fairy children."
"That's exactly correct." Calanthra replies. "But that all changed recently when I found out one of your human males somehow spontaneously altered his genetic profile to become a fairy. There is no doubt about it; Samuel Baker harnesses all the capability to reproduce that you humans do, as well as the trueborn powers of any male fairy."
"So... are you seeking a marriage alliance with Samuel Baker?" Jason asks, scratching his head in confusion. "You could just ask him yourself, you know?"
"This is not about one man." Calanthra retorts. "Samuel Baker, if he were to join our ranks, would certainly help us stave off extinction for a while longer. But that is hardly worth all this melodrama and me taking you to the Ancient Domain in person..."
Jason's eyes widen in realization. "I see! You... you're thinking that if my magic could make one male fairy, I could surely make another, and another..."
"Yes, precisely." Calanthra says, revealing a beautiful smile. "Additionally, if humans were to assist us in scouring these Ancient Domains, we could make great gains together. There is plenty of room for another species to join ours in locating powerful artifacts and other items capable of Uplifting us."
"You want to become Cosmics still." Jason muses. "You haven't resigned yourselves to your current fate."
"Quite the opposite." Calanthra says. "The curse placed upon us is unbreakable by those beneath the realm of Ruler. As I said before, the fairies have lost this Eternity's war. However, while we cannot Ascend any longer, that does not mean the humans are subject to the same limitation. If we could groom a human into becoming the Milky Way's Ruler, we could finally break free of our shackles by virtue of having a powerful ally."
She pauses, looking meaningfully at the Wordsmith.
"If the Demons or the Volgrim were to become our Ruler, we would not enjoy such a benefit. At best, we would only maintain the status quo, and at worst, they might eradicate us out of fear of having an unsightly tumor in their midst."
"Haha." Jason laughs. "So you brought me here to show your sincerity. I get it. Well, I'm definitely not opposed to helping you. Blinker is my good friend. If she were to ask me, I'd definitely say yes to just about any request."
Jason turns away. He walks a few feet off to the side and pauses, standing to gaze out at the Ancient Domain and its endlessly rolling plains which stretches off into the infinite distance...
"Here's what I can do." Jason says. "My people are already working on laying out the options for humanity and where our fellow men and women will depart over the next few weeks. Some will travel to Maiura. Some will go to Sharmur. Some will stay on Tarus II. It's no trouble at all to put Pixiv on the list, especially as I was already planning to do that. I even have some other places I'd like to include, too..."
"Such as Camael's Cube?" Calanthra asks with a smile. "Or do you perhaps mean Chrona and Hope's Hall of Heroes?"
Jason nearly jumps out of his skin. He whirls around to look at Calanthra with shock in his eyes. "What?! How do you know about Chrona? How do you also know about where Hope has been hiding?? I don't even know that much!"
"For those who are talented in magic, it is possible to see through many lies and deceptions." Calanthra says calmly, unfazed by the alarm on Jason's face. "Your Spynet Sphere isn't so different from the many options I have at my disposal. I have many means to keep an eye on the galaxy. And while Diablo does not know exactly where or what Chrona is, he certainly knows of its general existence."
Her smile turns cold. "I would advise you not to take Unarin lightly either, Wordsmith. That ancient creature is more capable than you can imagine. He is hiding a great many secrets from the galaxy... secrets he does not know that I am aware of. If he were to learn of the true extent of my information web, I fear that he would dispatch a handful of High Psions to eliminate the fairy species tomorrow."
Calanthra's words truly rock Jason to his core. All along, he assumed the precautions he put on Chrona, precautions that fooled even Hope, would make his hidden dimension impossible to detect.
But how could he be so naive?
As the daughter of an Apex Cosmic, Calanthra must have her means, and that likely means Unarin and Diablo aren't too far behind either.
"Shit." Jason curses, lowering his head as a flicker of anger smolders in his heart. "I was too complacent. Chrona isn't secure, which means it's only a matter of time before more Cosmics learn of its existence. How long before they can find its exact location and invade it?"
"Calm yourself, child." Calanthra says soothingly. "The situation is not that dire. After all, Chrona still exists within a highly accelerated timespace. Any biological entity that wishes to travel there could suffer severe after-effects. Furthermore, the entities born inside will be too adapted to living within a higher dimension, so they won't pose much threat to the creatures of realspace."
She waves her hand. "Let's move on, Jason. I want to discuss other matters before dying of old age."
The Wordsmith cools himself off. He inhales deeply, then returns his attention to her.
"Alright. What next, then?"
"Fairies are not the only Sentients capable of entering Ancient Domains." Calanthra explains. "There are others who rarely appear inside here. That is why exploring these domains can be dangerous. The good news is that Cosmics have little need to enter these barren lands, as most of the heritages, treasures, and other such gains you might find inside are only useful to mortals. There are exceptions, but they are so rare as to be a needle found within ten million haystacks. A waste of effort better spent simply progressing one's Cosmic power the ordinary way."
"So what you're saying is, when you send fairies into an Ancient Domain, they can die as a result of crossing paths with Sentients from other galaxies." Jason concludes. "But if you had an army of humans to enter with you, your people would be a lot safer."
"Safety in numbers, yes. And you humans are... uniquely advantaged in Ancient Domain exploration." Calanthra says mysteriously. "Before that, though... do you know what the Power of Imagination is, Wordsmith?"
Jason raises an eyebrow. "Imagination? Like the mental ability to visualize stuff in your head? Yeah. It's not that complicated to understand."
"Ah, that's where you're wrong." Calanthra chides gently. "Imagination is the key to magical power. Imagination, Conception, Visualization, these are all key capabilities powerful maguses and sorcerors use to uplift their capabilities! And as it turns out, most Sentients are actually quite terrible at conceptualizing thoughts into imagery."
She gestures grandly. "Just take the Volgrim! You may think they are a powerful Sentient species, but in fact the Volgrim have terrible imaginations. They are stodgy, dull, and lack a great deal of creativity. All the gains their Technopaths make through technology are developed via brute force. They slowly improve their technological prowess by minute fractions over long periods of time, eventually resulting in a large and cohesive buildup."
"At the same time, the Psions Uplift themselves through meditation and sitting motionless for thousands of years at a time. Can a species capable of such incredible feats of drudgery also possess limitless imagination? I think not."
"Maybe the reason they're able to sit still for so long is because they live in their imagination?" Jason posits. "In which case their power of imagination should be quite formidable, right?"
"Possible, but unlikely." Calanthra says with a wave of her hand. "Never mind that. The point I'm trying to make is that humans have an extremely high affinity for magic. If your people were to ally with mine, we could teach you our ways. You could help us through your Wordsmithing and superior genetics, creating more fairies and humans alike. This would create a recursive cycle that would continually bolster both our species to greater and greater heights!"
She lowers her voice back to normal. "An alliance with humanity would have other benefits. You humans are equally adept in technology and magic both. You are versatile, capable of learning any skill provided you have time to devote to your studies. The bursts of inspiration you receive also allow you to make large jumps in capability as well, which could mean that in a relatively short period, you might even be capable of challenging the Volgrim."
Jason nods. "That does sound tempting, Calanthra. I'm willing to help you, but I won't demand my people join the fairies. It would be better if those who were the most interested did so instead."
Calanthra playfully twirls a finger through her hair. "Well. My daughters are all beautiful. Perhaps you should make mention that the fairies are... aggressively interested in copulation?"
"COUGH COUGH!" Jason wheezes, taking a step back as he asses her bold choice of words. "Yeah! Uh, I can probably- I'll let everyone know about that too. Obviously!"
Calanthra chuckles. "Such a cute boy. Well, it seems I've accomplished what I wanted. Let's return for now. You can always pay Ripspace a visit later."
"I will." Jason says, nodding seriously. "Waypoint."
Calanthra raises an eyebrow. "You think you can return here without a Ruler's power?"
"Won't know unless I try." Jason smiles back.
...
Not long after, Jason and Calanthra emerge back into Realspace. He shivers as he feels the Eye of Yredelemnul fixating on him from behind, but Calanthra quickly reactivates the Formation of Light, sending the sliver of a Ruler back to the shadows so it can no longer interact with the physical world.
"You know, Jason." Calanthra says. "You are a Candidate. You have the capability to become a Ruler someday."
"I am?" Jason asks, before thinking back to a conversation in the past. "Oh yeah, someone did mention that to me before. But... eh. I don't know. Becoming a Ruler sounds awful."
"Awful?" Calanthra asks. "How so?"
"It seems... lonely." Jason says, his voice softening. He looks at the space between the four statues, where Yredelemnul's Eye has disappeared. "Imagine all your loved ones dying, but you're stuck behind, living through the end of an Eternity, which takes trillions of years before Heat Death finally eradicates everything. Then comes the next Eternity, where you can remake your species again... but it won't be the same. Even if you remake your loved ones, it won't really be them."
Jason lowers and shakes his head. "That sort of life doesn't suit me."
"I understand why you'd think that way." Calanthra says. "In fact, you are suffering from the same affliction that plagues all Candidates who began their Existences as Biologicals. We have too many ties to the mortal world, so the majority of Biologicals who ascend to the rank of Ruler... fall to their non-biological opponents."
"As for the things which are not biological..." Calanthra says, looking at Jason with disgust. "You should already know what they are."
"Highly evolved Artificial Intelligences?" Jason guesses.
"That's right." Calanthra affirms. "There are several tiers of power a superintelligence can possess. The Volgrim have taken great care to prevent anything above a Beta Core from forming in the Milky Way, but once, a long time ago... they made a huge mess by accidentally creating the Milky Way's first Alpha Core Synthmind."
Calanthra chuckles. "The stupid fools didn't only create an Alpha Core, they gave it autonomy in the hopes it would be able to stop the wars between their factions. They built indestructible bipedal bodies for its splintered intelligences, and called them... Sentinels. Luckily, they were able to defeat the Alpha Core before it ascended further, but countless other biological species have failed at that juncture, creating an Alpha Core that ultimately devoured the full power of their galaxy for itself."
A chill trickles down Jason's spine. "You're saying the vast majority of Rulers are actually Alpha Core AIs? AIs that control entire galaxies?!"
"No, Jason." Calanthra counters. "Alpha Cores can defeat advanced civilizations. But there is one Existence higher than an Alpha Core, a tier that can only be reached once it has swallowed the power of a galaxy."
"That would be an Omega Core. a sentient artificial intelligence that has become Ruler over one or more galaxies. And in Akasha's game, more than 90% of all Rulers are estimated to be these superior lifeforms."
"It is for that reason that these highly adaptable entities are known as The Evolved."

"Hell yeah, I wanna go exploring." Jason says to Calanthra with a smile. "How do we navigate around Ripspace though? Traveling to other galaxies is going to take billions of years, right? Surely, there's a shortcut."
"Ripspace is not as it seems." Calanthra explains, gesturing grandly to the epic sight before them. "It is a connection between the past and the present; the near and far. The further away or the further back you want to travel, the higher the price you will have to pay."
Jason's smile vanishes. "Wait... you can use Ripspace to travel back in time?!"
"No." Calanthra clarifies. "Time is linear. We cannot travel through it. Some can slow it down or speed it up. A rare few can even pause it for a short while. But moving forward and backward is impossible. Countless have attempted to do so over the eons, but all have failed."
She looks at Jason meaningfully. "Many Rulers would wipe out galaxies if it might let them obtain such a power. The fact they still haven't proves it is impossible."
Jason nods slowly. "I won't lie. I have a lot of regrets. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and save my daughter from dying."
"Everyone has regrets." Calanthra muses, looking off into the distance. "I have plenty, myself. But it's better this way. There would be pandemonium if time travel ever became possible."
She pauses before continuing with her explanation. "While we cannot go back in time, we can look back into time. Pinpointing exact moments in history is difficult, to say the least, but it is possible to use Ripspace to search for key moments in intergalactic history."
"So it's like a massive seer-stone." Jason muses aloud. "But wait, didn't you imply earlier that you used Ripspace to travel to the Milky Way from Andromeda? How does it allow you to jump between galaxies? Are other species using Ripspace for intergalactic travel?"
"You can indeed use Ripspace to travel to distant reaches of space." Calanthra explains. "But... you have to pay a certain price. Akasha's Barriers still protect every galaxy. Cosmics cannot travel between them easily. Mortals can, but the price we must pay is unimaginably steep. That is also the reason my mother perished not long after arriving in the Milky Way and giving birth to me."
The Fairy Monarch sighs softly.
"My people used the power of Ripspace to travel to several other galaxies. We were fortunate that the Creator had died, allowing us to take up residence here in secret, but the Angels, Titans, and Dragons were still a threat we could not overlook. Later, the Volgrim rose up too, and that was something that worried us for a while. Particularly when their Sentinels began to rapaciously erase the lives of innumerable Sentients."
She waves her hand. "Ultimately, very few galaxies didn't have a Ruler in power. Traveling to one that did meant flipping a coin and praying our people could avoid their gaze. Sadly, time has shown me that we were likely unsuccessful. I have lost contact with all my sisters across the cosmos."
The image of innumerable galaxies floating in the distance changes before Jason's eyes. Calanthra manipulates some unseen power, causing herself and Jason to suddenly materialize directly in front of a beautiful spiral galaxy.
"This is our Milky Way." Calanthra explains, waving her hand to conjure another, far bigger galaxy beside it. "And this is Andromeda."
"Is it just me or does Andromeda seem... brighter?" Jason asks.
"Andromeda contains far more interstellar particles, cosmic energy, and latent magical power than the Milky Way." Calanthra says. "Of course, in the ancient past, it had even more than it does now, but such is the way of entropy and Chaos."
Jason nods. "How exactly do galaxies lose power over time? Doesn't this feel self-defeating in a way?"
"Every Ruler enters the Unending War with a strategy." Calanthra says, motioning with her hands to disperse the galaxies and reveal images of ghostly creatures, some standing on two legs, some on four, and plenty that appear as mere blobs of energy. "I cannot pretend to know the thoughts of such high and mighty beings, especially as I am a mere mortal myself. Even so, I can definitively state that there are Rulers who seek to put as much galactic energy into their initial creations as possible, while others wish to adopt a more energy-efficient growth-model."
She pokes her finger against Jason's chest. "Take the angels and humans, for instance. The Creator poured the vast majority of his power into creating a galaxy full of Apex Cosmics. At their peak, the angels as a whole commanded enough power to flatten other galaxies. But what did they do instead? They fought with one another, killing themselves due to sheer boredom, if not outright ego."
"I see." Jason says, brushing Calanthra's finger away. "So the Creator dumped all the Milky Way's energy into the angels. I take it this is uncommon among Rulers?"
"Of course. It's a wasteful strategy and usually loses Rulers the War for that Eternity." Calanthra says dismissively. "The Timeless used a different strategy. She created the fairies as mere mortals that evolved over time, gaining greater and greater power through their own efforts. This meant that instead of devouring Andromeda's abundant Cosmic energy, they could slowly sap off its excess over time. For you see, the more energy a galaxy has, the more it can produce. If you ration it long enough, you can reap more of it across the duration of an Eternity."
"That makes sense." Jason concludes. "It's like a Rush build in an RTS versus an Economy build. You sacrifice long-term gains in exchange for short-term power. The problem is, with Akasha's Barriers preventing Rulers from attacking their enemies straight away, a Rush build is dumb because you're just wasting your resources and sacrificing Cosmic energy when you'll actually need it."
Calanthra blinks twice. She looks at Jason with a strange expression, then turns away for a moment, trying to understand the strange terms he's used. They mostly make sense, but some of them are a little...
She shakes her head and returns to the topic at hand. "Right. Rush strategy versus Economy. Of... course. Well, in any case, there is one advantage toward the first strategy. If you drain all the energy from your galaxy, it becomes less appealing for other Rulers to attack. Because Andromeda was so large and still filled with Cosmic power even billions of years after the Expansion Era, it stoked the hunger of the Dark Ones. Meanwhile, the Milky Way only needs to deal with the Plague, which is threatening for mortals, but manageable for Cosmics. In that respect, we've gotten off much luckier."
"I get the bigger picture now." Jason says with a nod. He turns to look back at the cosmos before him. "So, what about all this? Are we gonna go exploring, or what?"
"In order to explore the universe presented here, we would need to make sacrifices we cannot afford. I think you would find the price most disagreeable. But there is something we can explore freely..."
She waves her hand, and instantly, the brilliant and beautiful cosmic view of the universe vanishes.
In its place, Jason and Calanthra suddenly appear inside a dead, barren wasteland. Brown and grey dirt rises up in huge dunes stretching off into the distance. Fallen towers made of gold and stone lay on their sides, or stick into the ground, buried nearly up to their tops as they point diagonally toward the sky.
And speaking of the sky, it glows faintly grey, as if some weak, pale imitation of a star were trying to shine through a thin atmosphere clouded by dust and grime. The very air itself smells of sulfur and toxins, making Jason's nose curl up when he takes a breath.
"Ugh... what the hell? Where are we now?" Jason asks, as he turns and looks around at the dead world surrounding him.
"An Ancient Domain." Calanthra says softly. "A remnant of a dead universe. All life stripped away. All hope lost. Septillions of different Sentient species, gone. Their mortals, their Cosmics, reduced to dust by the Contraction."
The Wordsmith frowns. "This Ancient Domain represents a dead universe? But how can that be possible? If the Heat Death played out and all the galaxies faded to cosmic dust, then there already wouldn't be anything left. And then, if the entire universe collapsed into a singularity before exploding again, there definitely wouldn't be anything left behind resembling physical matter."
"You perceive reality through just three dimensions." Calanthra intones. "Time and space can be considered two dimensions. Cosmic Power is another dimension. I must admit I do not understand how Ancient Domains have continued to exist across countless Eternities, and I don't know how they retain a vaguely familiar form... but I can assure you that in spite of bending logic itself, they do exist and they can provide tangible benefits to those dedicated to exploring them."
"You've been exploring them, then?" Jason asks, turning away from the dead world to scrutinize Calanthra's phantasmal image.
"Me, a little. But often, I dispatch my descendants to scour these Ancient Domains for things of value. It may surprise you, but there are powerful artifacts, vengeful spirits, and all manner of other inter-dimensional horrors lurking within these so-called dead-lands."
Calanthra pauses. She shifts her posture to look at Jason deeply.
"And that is why I've brought you here, Jason. It's time for me to get down to the crux of the matter and breach the subject that I find most important."
He nods. "I'm listening."
"It's like this." Calanthra explains. "The Ancient Domains are unfathomably broad. Think of how large a universe is. Think of how many universes have existed. Think of how much space my people have yet to explore."
She pauses.
"The gains we have received have made my people stronger than you would expect. Among those gains are Yredelemnul's Eye and other leftover remnants of power that many dead ancient Rulers lost when their Existences became forfeit. While their tangible Existences may have perished, their spirits sometimes live on in these broad, unending dead universes..."
"That's why you approached me." Jason says, while crossing his arms and leaning on the ball of his heel. "You said you wanted an alliance with humanity. You... want humans to help you explore the Ancient Domains?"
"Trust is hard to come by among mortals, Cosmics, and Rulers." Calanthra says simply. "I never would have considered allying with the humans before, but you have shown me the broadness of your mind during the debate against your clone and the commander of your military. To some, you certainly appear naive, but to me I see an opportunity I would be foolish to ignore."
She continues. "The Fairies cannot reproduce efficiently. Every fairy we send into the Ancient Domain is one less fairy we have among our Empire. We already have a difficult time replenishing our numbers through the remaining Male Fairies, but do you think it is easy for us to reproduce with other species?"
Jason slowly shakes his head. "Blinker and Kar's children were all crocodiles, not fairies. From that, I can only imagine that most of the time, your mating attempts do not create more of yourselves, but instead more non-fairy children."
"That's exactly correct." Calanthra replies. "But that all changed recently when I found out one of your human males somehow spontaneously altered his genetic profile to become a fairy. There is no doubt about it; Samuel Baker harnesses all the capability to reproduce that you humans do, as well as the trueborn powers of any male fairy."
"So... are you seeking a marriage alliance with Samuel Baker?" Jason asks, scratching his head in confusion. "You could just ask him yourself, you know?"
"This is not about one man." Calanthra retorts. "Samuel Baker, if he were to join our ranks, would certainly help us stave off extinction for a while longer. But that is hardly worth all this melodrama and me taking you to the Ancient Domain in person..."
Jason's eyes widen in realization. "I see! You... you're thinking that if my magic could make one male fairy, I could surely make another, and another..."
"Yes, precisely." Calanthra says, revealing a beautiful smile. "Additionally, if humans were to assist us in scouring these Ancient Domains, we could make great gains together. There is plenty of room for another species to join ours in locating powerful artifacts and other items capable of Uplifting us."
"You want to become Cosmics still." Jason muses. "You haven't resigned yourselves to your current fate."
"Quite the opposite." Calanthra says. "The curse placed upon us is unbreakable by those beneath the realm of Ruler. As I said before, the fairies have lost this Eternity's war. However, while we cannot Ascend any longer, that does not mean the humans are subject to the same limitation. If we could groom a human into becoming the Milky Way's Ruler, we could finally break free of our shackles by virtue of having a powerful ally."
She pauses, looking meaningfully at the Wordsmith.
"If the Demons or the Volgrim were to become our Ruler, we would not enjoy such a benefit. At best, we would only maintain the status quo, and at worst, they might eradicate us out of fear of having an unsightly tumor in their midst."
"Haha." Jason laughs. "So you brought me here to show your sincerity. I get it. Well, I'm definitely not opposed to helping you. Blinker is my good friend. If she were to ask me, I'd definitely say yes to just about any request."
Jason turns away. He walks a few feet off to the side and pauses, standing to gaze out at the Ancient Domain and its endlessly rolling plains which stretches off into the infinite distance...
"Here's what I can do." Jason says. "My people are already working on laying out the options for humanity and where our fellow men and women will depart over the next few weeks. Some will travel to Maiura. Some will go to Sharmur. Some will stay on Tarus II. It's no trouble at all to put Pixiv on the list, especially as I was already planning to do that. I even have some other places I'd like to include, too..."
"Such as Camael's Cube?" Calanthra asks with a smile. "Or do you perhaps mean Chrona and Hope's Hall of Heroes?"
Jason nearly jumps out of his skin. He whirls around to look at Calanthra with shock in his eyes. "What?! How do you know about Chrona? How do you also know about where Hope has been hiding?? I don't even know that much!"
"For those who are talented in magic, it is possible to see through many lies and deceptions." Calanthra says calmly, unfazed by the alarm on Jason's face. "Your Spynet Sphere isn't so different from the many options I have at my disposal. I have many means to keep an eye on the galaxy. And while Diablo does not know exactly where or what Chrona is, he certainly knows of its general existence."
Her smile turns cold. "I would advise you not to take Unarin lightly either, Wordsmith. That ancient creature is more capable than you can imagine. He is hiding a great many secrets from the galaxy... secrets he does not know that I am aware of. If he were to learn of the true extent of my information web, I fear that he would dispatch a handful of High Psions to eliminate the fairy species tomorrow."
Calanthra's words truly rock Jason to his core. All along, he assumed the precautions he put on Chrona, precautions that fooled even Hope, would make his hidden dimension impossible to detect.
But how could he be so naive?
As the daughter of an Apex Cosmic, Calanthra must have her means, and that likely means Unarin and Diablo aren't too far behind either.
"Shit." Jason curses, lowering his head as a flicker of anger smolders in his heart. "I was too complacent. Chrona isn't secure, which means it's only a matter of time before more Cosmics learn of its existence. How long before they can find its exact location and invade it?"
"Calm yourself, child." Calanthra says soothingly. "The situation is not that dire. After all, Chrona still exists within a highly accelerated timespace. Any biological entity that wishes to travel there could suffer severe after-effects. Furthermore, the entities born inside will be too adapted to living within a higher dimension, so they won't pose much threat to the creatures of realspace."
She waves her hand. "Let's move on, Jason. I want to discuss other matters before dying of old age."
The Wordsmith cools himself off. He inhales deeply, then returns his attention to her.
"Alright. What next, then?"
"Fairies are not the only Sentients capable of entering Ancient Domains." Calanthra explains. "There are others who rarely appear inside here. That is why exploring these domains can be dangerous. The good news is that Cosmics have little need to enter these barren lands, as most of the heritages, treasures, and other such gains you might find inside are only useful to mortals. There are exceptions, but they are so rare as to be a needle found within ten million haystacks. A waste of effort better spent simply progressing one's Cosmic power the ordinary way."
"So what you're saying is, when you send fairies into an Ancient Domain, they can die as a result of crossing paths with Sentients from other galaxies." Jason concludes. "But if you had an army of humans to enter with you, your people would be a lot safer."
"Safety in numbers, yes. And you humans are... uniquely advantaged in Ancient Domain exploration." Calanthra says mysteriously. "Before that, though... do you know what the Power of Imagination is, Wordsmith?"
Jason raises an eyebrow. "Imagination? Like the mental ability to visualize stuff in your head? Yeah. It's not that complicated to understand."
"Ah, that's where you're wrong." Calanthra chides gently. "Imagination is the key to magical power. Imagination, Conception, Visualization, these are all key capabilities powerful maguses and sorcerors use to uplift their capabilities! And as it turns out, most Sentients are actually quite terrible at conceptualizing thoughts into imagery."
She gestures grandly. "Just take the Volgrim! You may think they are a powerful Sentient species, but in fact the Volgrim have terrible imaginations. They are stodgy, dull, and lack a great deal of creativity. All the gains their Technopaths make through technology are developed via brute force. They slowly improve their technological prowess by minute fractions over long periods of time, eventually resulting in a large and cohesive buildup."
"At the same time, the Psions Uplift themselves through meditation and sitting motionless for thousands of years at a time. Can a species capable of such incredible feats of drudgery also possess limitless imagination? I think not."
"Maybe the reason they're able to sit still for so long is because they live in their imagination?" Jason posits. "In which case their power of imagination should be quite formidable, right?"
"Possible, but unlikely." Calanthra says with a wave of her hand. "Never mind that. The point I'm trying to make is that humans have an extremely high affinity for magic. If your people were to ally with mine, we could teach you our ways. You could help us through your Wordsmithing and superior genetics, creating more fairies and humans alike. This would create a recursive cycle that would continually bolster both our species to greater and greater heights!"
She lowers her voice back to normal. "An alliance with humanity would have other benefits. You humans are equally adept in technology and magic both. You are versatile, capable of learning any skill provided you have time to devote to your studies. The bursts of inspiration you receive also allow you to make large jumps in capability as well, which could mean that in a relatively short period, you might even be capable of challenging the Volgrim."
Jason nods. "That does sound tempting, Calanthra. I'm willing to help you, but I won't demand my people join the fairies. It would be better if those who were the most interested did so instead."
Calanthra playfully twirls a finger through her hair. "Well. My daughters are all beautiful. Perhaps you should make mention that the fairies are... aggressively interested in copulation?"
"COUGH COUGH!" Jason wheezes, taking a step back as he asses her bold choice of words. "Yeah! Uh, I can probably- I'll let everyone know about that too. Obviously!"
Calanthra chuckles. "Such a cute boy. Well, it seems I've accomplished what I wanted. Let's return for now. You can always pay Ripspace a visit later."
"I will." Jason says, nodding seriously. "Waypoint."
Calanthra raises an eyebrow. "You think you can return here without a Ruler's power?"
"Won't know unless I try." Jason smiles back.
...
Not long after, Jason and Calanthra emerge back into Realspace. He shivers as he feels the Eye of Yredelemnul fixating on him from behind, but Calanthra quickly reactivates the Formation of Light, sending the sliver of a Ruler back to the shadows so it can no longer interact with the physical world.
"You know, Jason." Calanthra says. "You are a Candidate. You have the capability to become a Ruler someday."
"I am?" Jason asks, before thinking back to a conversation in the past. "Oh yeah, someone did mention that to me before. But... eh. I don't know. Becoming a Ruler sounds awful."
"Awful?" Calanthra asks. "How so?"
"It seems... lonely." Jason says, his voice softening. He looks at the space between the four statues, where Yredelemnul's Eye has disappeared. "Imagine all your loved ones dying, but you're stuck behind, living through the end of an Eternity, which takes trillions of years before Heat Death finally eradicates everything. Then comes the next Eternity, where you can remake your species again... but it won't be the same. Even if you remake your loved ones, it won't really be them."
Jason lowers and shakes his head. "That sort of life doesn't suit me."
"I understand why you'd think that way." Calanthra says. "In fact, you are suffering from the same affliction that plagues all Candidates who began their Existences as Biologicals. We have too many ties to the mortal world, so the majority of Biologicals who ascend to the rank of Ruler... fall to their non-biological opponents."
"As for the things which are not biological..." Calanthra says, looking at Jason with disgust. "You should already know what they are."
"Highly evolved Artificial Intelligences?" Jason guesses.
"That's right." Calanthra affirms. "There are several tiers of power a superintelligence can possess. The Volgrim have taken great care to prevent anything above a Beta Core from forming in the Milky Way, but once, a long time ago... they made a huge mess by accidentally creating the Milky Way's first Alpha Core Synthmind."
Calanthra chuckles. "The stupid fools didn't only create an Alpha Core, they gave it autonomy in the hopes it would be able to stop the wars between their factions. They built indestructible bipedal bodies for its splintered intelligences, and called them... Sentinels. Luckily, they were able to defeat the Alpha Core before it ascended further, but countless other biological species have failed at that juncture, creating an Alpha Core that ultimately devoured the full power of their galaxy for itself."
A chill trickles down Jason's spine. "You're saying the vast majority of Rulers are actually Alpha Core AIs? AIs that control entire galaxies?!"
"No, Jason." Calanthra counters. "Alpha Cores can defeat advanced civilizations. But there is one Existence higher than an Alpha Core, a tier that can only be reached once it has swallowed the power of a galaxy."
"That would be an Omega Core. a sentient artificial intelligence that has become Ruler over one or more galaxies. And in Akasha's game, more than 90% of all Rulers are estimated to be these superior lifeforms."
"It is for that reason that these highly adaptable entities are known as The Evolved."

Age:29 Gender: female Weight: 162 lbs Height: 5’6 Non smoker Medications: prenatal vitamin
This blood was taken at 10 weeks gestation Still waiting for nipt results. My obgyn has up to 72 hours to review so I don’t think I will hear back until Monday. Everything else is in range except neutrophils and lymphocytes but those were the same as my last pregnancy. I have never had mpv or nrbc flagged before.
The values are: Mpv 10.7 (range ended 10.4) NRBC% .9 (%) NRBC# .07 (10³ ul)
Can this indicate anemia even with normal rbc and hemoglobin values?
Also could this be baby’s nrbc or mine?

I’m curious to know if these values would suggest asthma? Test results came back won’t be interpreted for a while. I also test myself at home using a peak flow meter I can’t get above 240. I’m not sure which one to believe.
28F 179lbs 5’3 (predicted value for my age weight and height should be over 410) I’m a non-smoker No serious health issues other than breathlessness/shortness of breath and allergies

Aarhus Taxa has some very bad reviews on Google, I had also bad experience with them while I once waited for 30 min ( Saturday morning, not a peak time). I have seen there is a taxi company Viggo, as well as Dantaxa etc. Which one is the most reliable? I really do not want to experience again waiting 30 min for a taxi.

Kokichi and Himiko hurried over to Himiko's secret magic room. Once there, Himiko threw open the pages of "Inside the Magical Mind" over to the "Build the Perfect Dream" chapter. She flipped through the pages until she found what she was looking for.
"A-ha!" she squeaked with excitement, placing her finger on the horror section. Kokichi grinned at her.
"Nee-heehee...I know we're supposed to be serious, and all, but that 'a-ha!' was super cute, Monkey Buns!" Kokichi said, giving Himiko a squeeze.
"Nyeh...that's because I'm super cute...thank you very much," Himiko said, sassily flipping her hair.
"Yes, you are," Kokichi murmured in a low, flirty voice, leaning his head against Himiko's. "I wuv my cute, wittle Monkey Buns." He gave Himiko a few soft kisses on her lips. Himiko giggled in delight.
"Okay, okay, it's back to being serious," she said suddenly, clapping her hands with a purpose.
"Yup, yup! It's go time!" Kokichi said, nodding enthusiastically. Himiko studied the horror section of the book:
~HORROR:~
Want a more terrifying experience in your dreams? No? Would you like to give your enemies nightmares, then? If that's the case, try filling up your enemy's mind with the most horrific thing they could ever imagine! Or, use a more lighthearted, yet creepy, potion to prank a friend! That works, too! Take them on a night filled with monsterific fright!
Himiko skimmed the first two potions, "Thriller Night dream," and the "Goosebumps dream." She stopped straight at the "Nightmare Fuel dream."
"Nyeh...this is the one that we need," she said, grinning deviously. Kokichi grinned along with her.
"Oooo...I love when my Supreme Lady gets all mischievous," he said with a ghoulish giggle as he kissed her cheek. Himiko giggled with him, as well, before reading on:
Nightmare Fuel dream: Want your enemies to experience the ultimate nightmare? Then, the Nightmare Fuel dream is the perfect one for you...or should I say, your enemy. Huhuhu! Give them them a night full of what they fear the most, whether it's a bunch of wriggly spiders, or a terrifying ghost!
Kokichi and Himiko grinned at each other impishly.
"Perfect!" they murmured in unison, and giggled deviously as Himiko poured in the ingredients. As she stirred the potion, eerie wisps of green and purple mist emanated from the cauldron. Himiko waved her hands mysteriously over her cauldron to part the mists away. Kokichi was mesmerized by her movements. Her face glowed bright in beautiful shades of shimmering green and purple. Kokichi felt his heart beat faster. If they weren't making cookies, this could be the perfect romantic setting. He couldn't resist her mischievous grin as she continued to pour and mix the ingredients. He felt as if he were falling in love all over again. Himiko looked up at him, catching him staring. She batted her eyelashes seductively at him, beckoning him closer. Finding her alluring and completely irresistible, Kokichi moved closer to her. He placed his hands on her waist and pulled her into a deep, passionate kiss. He then wrapped his arms tightly around Himiko. He couldn't resist. Heart raging against his chest, he reached up her shirt, caressing her back with his hands. His hand slowly moved up towards her bra to unhook it.
Snoozydoodle, my ass, he thought to himself. All my dreams are coming true right here! Suddenly, he moved his lips down to her neck. Himiko gasped softly and smiled. She placed her lips next to Kokichi's ear.

"Kokichi," she whispered seductively.
"Mmmm...yes...my Supreme Lady...?" Kokichi murmured in response, using his lips to move Himiko's shirt collar to gently bite Himiko's shoulder.
"The cookies, Kokichi..." Himiko reminded him in a sultry whisper. Kokichi's hands froze right as he was about to unhook her bra. He squeezed her longingly, but in the end, reluctantly released her.
"Right..." he mumbled. "Sorry..." He sighed, feeling dizzy. He had to admit that he loved the way Himiko made him feel. He shook his head to clear his mind. His breathing slowed back to a steady pace, as well as his heart. Now wasn't the time for feelings. They had to focus on the task at hand. Himiko smiled and bit her lip flirtatiously at him. He could tell she wanted him just as badly in that moment. But, she continued mixing the potion. He turned away from her, as if to block out any lustful temptations.
"Nyeh...it's finally done," Himiko said, breaking the silence. She poured the potion into a potion bottle.
"Ready to go?" Kokichi asked, trying to overcome the spell he was just under. Himiko nodded. Once they left the room, Kokichi grabbed Himiko's wrist. "Himiko...what happened back there...you didn't...do that to me, right?" Himiko smiled as she blushed bright red and shook her head.
"Nope," she replied. Kokichi nodded slowly.
"I thought so," he said. They both took deep breaths. "Pheeew! That was something, huh?" he said, scratching his head with a sheepish blush splashed onto his face.
"Nyeh...it was probably just a heat-of-the-moment type thing," Himiko said.
"Yeah, er, um...sorry about...y'know...reaching up your shirt and..." Kokichi began. Himiko looked at him with a seductive gleam in her eye and smiled naughtily as she placed her hand on his chest.
"You can do whatever you want to me..." she murmured in a low voice. "...and that's the truth." She bit her lip and winked flirtatiously at him before turning and walking away without another word. Kokichi stared after her, stunned, as she walked along the train tracks leading to the abandoned train station. Suddenly, a devilish grin crossed his face as he ran to catch up to her. He wrapped an arm around her waist and gave her a kiss on the lips before both breaking off into a run with mischievous giggling to D.I.C.E. headquarters to bake cookies for the final time.
End
"Don't go chasin' waterfalls. Listen to the rivers and the lakes that you're uuused to," Four sang, holding a broom handle like a microphone. Five paused from polishing some furniture and turned to him with a scoff.
"Ugh...dummy! Hello! It's 'Please stick to the rivers and the lakes that you're used to,'" she corrected.
"Well...whatever," Four grumbled. "I don't like that dumb song anyway."
"Hahaha...why, cuz you got the words wrong?" Six cackled.
"N-No!" Four stammered, going back to sweeping the floor. Two held the dustpan out so Four could sweep the dirt into it. "I just...think it's dumb! How can someone chase a waterfall when it doesn't even move?!"
"Pffft! I don't know, I didn't come up with the lyrics! Why don't you ask DLC?" Six answered. Five rolled her eyes.
"TLC!! " she corrected.
"Whaaaateveeeerrrrr!!" Six shouted back. Suddenly, the front doors of the headquarters burst open, and in walked Kokichi and Himiko.
"Boss! You're here!" Four said, blocking Kokichi's way. "Can I ask you something?"
"Not now, Ichiro, Himiko and I have some business in the kitchen," Kokichi replied urgently. He swerved around Four, but Four ran up to block his way again. "Ugh! What, Ichiro?!" Kokichi exclaimed testily.
"Um...is it 'Don't go chasing waterfalls, listen to the rivers and the lakes that you're used to,' or is it, 'please stick to the rivers and the lakes that you're used to?'" Four asked timidly.
"The latter," Kokichi replied briefly, then dashed away quickly to the kitchen.
"DAMMMIIIIIT!!" Four cried, falling to his knees in defeat. Five grinned smugly at him.
"Told ya!" she said before continuing her polishing.
In the kitchen, Kokichi and Himiko got to work on the last batches of the Snoozydoodles. Kokichi preheated the oven. Himiko poured the ingredients, including some of her potion, inside, and Kokichi mixed afterwards. Right after sticking one batch into the oven, they immediately got started on a second batch. After a few hours of baking, they had finally come up with enough batches for the entire school.
"Nyeh...that was exhausting," Himiko sighed, leaning against the wall.
"Well, that was only half the battle, HimiCocoa Bean," Kokichi said, pulling her up. "We gotta get these cookies to Hope's Peak."
"Ooo! Can I have one?" Four asked, reaching for a cookie.
"No!" Kokichi said, slapping his hand away.
"Nyeh...Kokichi? How are going to carry all these cookies?" Himiko asked, gesturing to the stacks upon stacks of cookies on the counter.
"Kazuki!" Kokichi called to Eight. Eight silently walked in and saluted. "Bring the confetti cannon."
"Yes, boss," Eight replied, then hurried away. He came back a few minutes later lugging a large, black, tubular contraption with a long, black hose with ridges similar to a one on a vacuum cleaner.
"Thank you!" Kokichi replied. Eight saluted in response. "It's clear of confetti, right?"
"Yes, sir," Eight replied.
"Great!" Kokichi said. "Takehiko!" Ten now appeared in the kitchen, taking his place next to Eight.
"You rang, boss?" he asked.
"Yup! Fire up the Happycopter and wait there for us," Kokichi ordered.
"On it like a bonnet!" Ten promised and scurried off.
"Monkey Buns, help me pour the cookies into this hole right here," Kokichi said, opening up a lid on top of the cannon similar to a fuel cap on a car.
"Nyeh...got it, boss," Himiko replied with a smile. Kokichi smiled back at her and stroked her cheek affectionately. They both began pouring the cookies inside the confetti cannon. Once all the cookies were inside, Kokichi closed the lid.
"Alright, babe, we're ready to roll!" he said to Himiko. Himiko nodded firmly in response. Kokichi turned to Eight. "Kazuki, give us a hand." Eight saluted and helped Kokichi and Himiko carry the cannon up the stairs all the way to the rooftop, where Ten was waiting for them in the Happycopter. The three hoisted the cannon inside. Kokichi hopped in and helped Himiko inside.
"Where to, boss?" Ten asked.
"Drop us down on the roof of Hope's Peak," Kokichi replied.
"Caaaan do!" Ten said, then took off. He landed the Happycopter on the roof of the academy, and helped Kokichi lug the cannon out.
"Alright, Ten! We'll take it from here!" Kokichi shouted over the blades of the Happycopter. Ten answered with a salute, then flew the Happycopter back to D.I.C.E. headquarters. The final bell to Hope's Peak rang, and the students began pouring out of the front entrance far below. Kokichi pulled out a megaphone.
"He-eeeey, everyoooone!" he sang, his voice ringing loud and clear. The students looked up at him.
"Hey! It's Kokichi!" Kaito said, pointing up at the roof.
"And Himiko's with him!" Ibuki added. Himiko felt dizzy from such a great height.
"Nyeeeh...I feel woozy," she muttered. "I'm glad I'm only 4' 11." I don't think I could stand being taller than that."
"That's alright, HimiCocoa Bean, I'll do all the talking," Kokichi said. "Just get ready to flip that switch when I tell you to." Himiko went to the cannon and waited by a tiny, black lever.
"Hey, Kokichi!! Tell Himiko to give us more cookies!" Kazuichi cried.
"You guys want Snoozydoodles?" Kokichi asked through the megaphone. Everyone cheered. "I saaiiid...do you guys want Snoozydoodles?" Kokichi repeated louder, increasing suspense. Everyone cheered louder.
"Hurry up and give us the damn cookies!!" Miu screamed at the top of her lungs. Kokichi turned to Himiko.
"Flip the switch, Monkey Buns!" he said. Himiko flipped the tiny lever, activating the confetti cannon. Kokichi held up the ridged hose, and out flew dozens of cookies. The students below cheered and clamored for the cookies. Everyone grabbed a cookie and headed home. Kokichi turned to Himiko and gave her a high five.
"Well done, Himiko!" he said. "Now all we gotta do is wait!"
***
The next morning, Himiko woke up to see Tenko sitting on the edge of her bed in horror. Her eyes were wide and she was pale as if she had seen a ghost. Himiko crept slowly over to her.
"Nyeh...Tenko? Are you okay?" Himiko asked worriedly. Tenko jumped back in fear.
"WAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!" she screamed, jumping back under her blanket.
"Nyeh! T-Tenko! It's just me!" Himiko said. Tenko peeked out from under her blanket.
"H-H-Himiko...?" she stammered.
"That's right. It's just me," Himiko said. Shivering violently, Tenko crawled out from under blanket again. "Tenko, what happened?"
"H-H-Had...nightmare..." Tenko stammered. "N-N-nothing b-b-but...darkness. And...c-c-creepy singing. I couldn't move! It's like I was trapped inside a...a...cage! The next thing I know...there was a sharp p-p-pain in my neck!"
"Oh, my!" Himiko exclaimed.
"Th-Th-That's when I w-w-woke up," Tenko said, holding her blanket up to her face. Then, she slowly lowered her blanket with an apologetic expression. "Himiko...i-i-if it's okay with you...I d-don't think I want another S-Snoozyd-d-doodle..."
"Yeah! Okay!" Himiko nodded. It was exactly what she wanted! She hurried to get dressed, then headed downstairs to the dining room to see the others' faces filled with woe and misery, as if their nightmares had drained every ounce of life from their bodies.
"Nee-heehee...looks like all their hopes and dreams got shattered, huh?" Kokichi whispered, suddenly appearing next to Himiko, leaning his elbow on her shoulder. Himiko grinned and nodded.
"But, I wanna make sure they don't crave my Snoozydoodles at all, anymore," she said. She walked into the dining room. "Nyeh...anyone in the mood for more Snoozydoodles?" Everyone snapped to attention with sheer horror in their eyes.
"NOOOOOOOO!!!" Kaito wailed.
"Keep those cookies from hell away from us!!" Miu cried, tears streaming from her eyes. "There was nothing but...t-t-toilet paper everywhere!! And some buff guy I couldn't identify was running after me with one of the rolls tryin' to strangle meeee!!"
"Gonta not wanna get stabbed by bug again!!" Gonta sobbed into his hands. "Bugs betray Gontaaaaaa!!"
"I...had boiled water thrown on me..." Kiyo said, his face pale and sweaty. "Then, to add salt to the wound, Sister threw salt on my wounds." He shuddered violently.
"I was surrounded by a bunch of piranhas," Ryoma said. "And then, they started biting me. I...could actually feel the biting." Everyone was holding themselves, rocking back and forth, trying to erase their nightmares from their minds.
"Himiko...if it's alright with you...I'm done with Snoozydoodles," Tsumugi said. Himiko pretended to appear despondent.
"I understand," she said. Then, she turned to Kokichi with a huge grin. Kokichi gave her a thumbs up.
"That's my Supreme Lady," he murmured in her ear and gave her a kiss.
***
Weeks later, the time finally came for the surprise field trip. Usami ushered the students onto the buses.
"Where do you think we're going, Monkey Buns?" Kokichi asked Himiko.
"Nyeh...I'm not sure," Himiko replied.
"Tuh...wherever it is, it better not have anything to do with cookies," Miu muttered bitterly. She was hanging over their seat from behind.
"Uh...this is a private conversation between me and my Supreme Lady," Kokichi said. "So, back off, bitch!"
"Eeeeeeee!!! Okay, okaaaayyyy!!" Miu whined, shriveling back down into her seat. The buses lurched forward, and drove a few hours, passing cities like Osaka and Kobe. From Kobe, they drove through Awaji island to one of Japan's main islands, Shikoku, to Ehime prefecture. From there, they took a ferry ride to a small island.
"Heeey, you're taking us to an island?!" Kazuichi asked in annoyance. "How annoying! What's so great about a damn island?! We live on one! Japan is made of a bunch of them!"
"Don't worry! You'll like this place, I'm sure!" Usami promised.
"Oh, my! If that island is what I think it is, we shall definitely have the best time of our lives!" Sonia cried.

"What is it?" Kaede asked.
"I...do not want to tell," Sonia said. "I do not want to get my hopes up." Himiko turned to Kokichi.
"Do you know what she's talking about, Kokichi?" she whispered. Kokichi shrugged.
"Beats me," he replied. "Honestly, I think it'll be fun to find out." Finally, the ferry pulled in to dock. The students climbed off the ferry, and were startled by Sonia's cry of pure joy.
"I KNEW IT!!!" she exclaimed. The students turned to see what she was so happy about, and gasped in delight. There before them, were a bunch of cats! Cats laying around, cats pouncing on birds, cats being petted by tourists. There were cats everywhere!
"Students...welcome to Aoshima Island!" Usami announced grandly. "Feel free to pet the kitties to your heart's content!" The students rushed over to them with glee.
"Awwww...hey, there, wittle kitty-wittyyyyy...!" Kaede gushed, holding a cat up to her nose. then, she held it to Shuichi. "Wanna pet him, Shuichi?" Shuichi patted the cat politely on his head.
"Fuhahahahaaaa!! I shall set up my feline army here!" Gundham said. Many cats surrounded him. "Behold, feline warriors! It is I, your king, Gundham Ta-nyah-kaaa!!"
"Huh...I didn't think someone like you was capable of making puns," Kazuichi said.
"I thought it was a wonderful pun!" Sonia said.
"Pretty cute, huh, Himiko?" Kokichi asked, holding up a black and white cat. Himiko held up a cat with ginger fur.
"Nyeh...this one, too!" she said with a nod.

"Heeeey...these two look like they'd make a great couple!" Kokichi said. They held their cats together. One black and white, and the other, with its fiery red-orange fur.
"I couldn't agree more, Kokichi," Himiko replied, batting her eyelashes at him. The black and white cat's green eyes twinkled with mischief, while the ginger cat just hung there lazily in Himiko's arms. The black and white cat playfully swiped at the ginger cat. The ginger cat made an annoyed noise and pawed at the black and white one. The black and white cat nuzzled its head against the ginger's, and the ginger cat seemed to smile. Kokichi and Himiko giggled and set the cats down. The black and white cat nudged the ginger. He ran a few feet ahead, then stopped, waiting for the ginger to follow. The ginger stood up and trotted after the black and white. The black and white hopped up and down excitedly and broke off into a run. Kokichi wrapped his arm around Himiko's waist as they watched the the ginger catching up to the black and white, running alongside each other off to another adventure, no doubt.

So, I want to discuss this because I know there is some hardcore fallout fans in this sub. I had a discussion with someone that I guess turned into a debate, why he thinks Lanius can still take FO4 brotherhood knights or paladins and I think the opposite, and I wanted to discuss this here.
It is clearly obvious that you can't compare power armor from Vegas to Fallout 4/76, aside from protection, radiation, etc. yes, power armor is power armor in the Lore. So Legate Lanius is the terror of the East. I would describe him as warrior first, and general second. NOTE: I am not undermining that he isn’t a brilliant tactician and isn’t smart. He is peak human physique and strength. Hand to hand, combat skills, and melee skills.
Fallout 4 Power armor grants the user superhuman strength, no fall damage, which I think exceeds that of Lanius, and let alone a power armor with gear is about 1 ton. New Vegas, power armor offers protection, slight radiation resistance, but can harm your special stats given the model. You are slower, you don't need fusion cores which is a plus, aside from everything else you're more clunky.
Legate is 6'11, and in NV he towers over most characters even the BOS, which is why I think in FO4 it does a better representation on height and Power armor overall. A power armor frame is 7-7'3 give or take. Now let's keep this lore friendly. Aside from gameplay, do you think that Lanius still has a chance on beating paladins or knights? In my opinion, I just don't see it, but I'm willing to hear someone out on why Legate would still win or not.
I'm not biased, because at the end of the day, these are just opinions, but I do think that someone like paladin Danse (in power armor x-01 or T60) can take on Legate in strength alone. NOTE: I'm not talking about gameplay, but lore wise.

Thank you in advance for any advice.
Hoping someone can shed some light on this subject for me. We have a 30' travel trailer (first time) and are buying our first generator. We do not need one for the house, our city has really good power and no issues with climate; so dual purpose is not necessary. This is really just to power our air conditioner at night in the trailer, rarely a microwave (which we can just turn off the AC) or anything else.
I recently purchased an Onan P4500i Cummins on sale for $1200 (usually $1500) from a local dealer. Got the thing home, setup and the battery was dead (manual said it came fully charged), no big deal I'll just run it for a couple hours to charge; wrong, it was dead dead. Worst part was the thing was really loud, but it's advertised as Super Quiet 54db. I could run this thing out front of my house and hear it from the very back of the house really clearly, hardly quiet with no load. It's possible it's just an all around bad unit but from the reviews on Reddit I don't think so; they seem to just be reliable, but loud.
I started looking at a Honda 2200, since I have an in law that has that same one and it's worked great for their AC in their trailer. I looked up a conversion online and it looks like it is very under-spec'd for an AC unit though, it should be at least a 3500 to reliably run an AC; albeit I have never had issues with their 2200 overloading, I'm just going by the book.
Recently a brother of mine recommended Predator as it's nearly identical to Honda at a lower price. My father in law has a Predator 2200 (same experience as the Honda to run their AC, no overload) and it is as dead silent as the Honda. So I started looking at Harbor Freight for the 3500 and 5000.
I'm looking at the Predator 3500 for the price point, quietness, and the fact that it should reliably run the AC at night. However, it doesn't come with remote start/stop and that would be really nice, I know that runs a couple hundred dollars and for almost the same price I could get the 5000 (runs at around 3900, 5000 is peak) which comes with remote start/stop already on it, and can do dual fuel.
A few questions:

1. Should I get the Predator 5000 (from Harbor Freight locally) since it seems to be the best deal with remote start and can reliably run my AC per the conversion, or should I be looking at something else?
2. Is the Onan P4500i Cummins loud for anyone else or did I just get a dud and should be looking at getting another one (4500 is peak, runs around 3900)?
3. Should I just get the Predator 3500 and add remote start instead of the 5000?
4. If I were to get the Predator 5000, why does anyone use propane rather than just use gas?

Edit: I returned the Onan already.

Hey all,
Need some help deciding on speakers + sub. Has to be in-wall for space/WAF, but sub will be floor-standing (but probably smaller ported or larger sealed for minimal footprint).
Room layout: ~1500sqft (~14x13x8'). Mostly dedicated HT room. Couch is against back wall. 105" screen opposite couch wall. LR to left and right of screen, but center will be below screen. Sides are slightly behind ideal 50/50 due to window, but shouldn't be too bad. Reaback surrounds are almost 90' to left and right of the seating position, and have to be about 35' above level with seating position (has to go above door, so max size is about 12x12x4" due to framing unless I want to redo framing).
All of this sorta leads me to coaxial for the off-axis performance, but Monolith seems to get good reviews for off-axis performance too. AVR is Denon x4300H. Don't want to do AT screen if possible.
I'm aware of Revel, Focal, Triad, Theory, Perlisten, etc, but I keep coming back to KEF vs Monolith. Can't do dual sub for space/WAF. Plan is something like these:
Option 1-KEF LR-Ci3160RLM-THX (I doubt I need to go up to the 5160) C-Ci3160RLM-THX Sides-Ci3160RLM-THX or Ci200QS/Ci160QS/Ci130QS ReaHeights-Ci200QS, Ci160QS, Ci130QS Sub-? (thinking SB-2000 Pro, KEF KC92, Rhythmik F12, Monolith M10/M12) Total: A lot
Option 2-Monolith LR-THX-365IW (I doubt I need to go up to the 465iw) C-THX-365IW (can this go horizontal?) Sides-THX-365IW or THX-275IW Rears-THX-265IW (would need to modify framing a bit), Amber 6.5" with Ribbon (24432), or Amber 8" Ceiling (24435) Heights-Amber 8" ceiling (24435) Sub-? (thinking SB-2000 Pro, KEF KC92, Rhythmik F12, Monolith M10/M12) Total: A lot LESS
Questions: 1-Which option would you go with for the room, budget being irrelevant?
2-What sub would you choose?
3-If option 1, is the 3610 fine as a horizontal center?
4-If option 2, is the 365 fine as a horizontal center?
5-If option 2, would the ribbon tweeters blend with the rest of the THX setup?
Anything I'm missing? Thanks!!

1. Amazon Store Rent
First, let's talk about the monthly rent for an Amazon store. Registering an Amazon store is free, but using a company registration instead of a personal one is recommended. This approach is safer and has a higher approval rate. After registering, you can choose between an Individual account and a Professional account.
Individual Account: This account has no monthly fee, but you'll pay Amazon $0.99 for each item you sell. It’s suitable for sellers who are just starting out and have lower sales volumes.
Professional Account: This account costs $39.99 per month, but you won’t pay a fee per sale. This option is more cost-effective if you sell more than 40 items per month.
Recommendation: If you’re just starting and your sales are low, opt for the Individual account. As your sales increase and you consistently sell more than 40 items per month, switch to the Professional account to save on per-item fees.

1. Product Selection Tools

Choosing the right products to sell is crucial for the success of your e-commerce business. Fortunately, there are several tools available to assist with this process, each offering unique features to help you make informed decisions.
Popular Paid Tools: JungleScout and Helium10
JungleScout: Priced at $49/month, JungleScout is widely recognized for its comprehensive suite of tools designed to help sellers identify profitable products, estimate sales, and analyze competition. Its features include:
Product Database: Allows you to filter products based on various criteria like price, sales, and competition.
Product Tracker: Helps track the performance of potential products over time.
Keyword Scout: Provides keyword research and optimization suggestions to enhance product listings.
Sales Analytics: Offers insights into sales trends and revenue estimates.
Helium10: At $79/month, Helium10 is another powerful tool that provides a wide range of functionalities for Amazon sellers. Key features include:
Black Box: A product research tool that allows you to find profitable niches.
Xray: A Chrome extension that gives you a quick overview of product performance metrics directly on Amazon.
Keyword Research: Tools like Cerebro and Magnet help you discover and optimize for high-ranking keywords.
Listing Optimization: Features like Scribbles and Index Checker ensure your product listings are optimized for maximum visibility.
Free Tool: 4SELLER
4SELLER: For those who are looking for a budget-friendly option, 4SELLER is a free tool that offers a robust set of features to aid in product selection and management. It includes:
Product Selection: Assists in identifying profitable products by analyzing market trends and competition.
Inventory Management: Helps track inventory levels, forecast demand, and manage stock efficiently to prevent overstocking or stockouts.
Supplier Finder: Aids in locating reliable suppliers, which is essential for maintaining product quality and consistency.
Why Product Selection Tools are Essential
Using product selection tools is vital because they provide data-driven insights that help you make informed decisions. These tools can save you time and reduce the risk of choosing products that may not sell well. They offer features that allow you to:
Identify Trends: By analyzing market data, these tools help you stay ahead of trends and capitalize on emerging opportunities.
Evaluate Competition: Understanding your competition is crucial. These tools provide detailed analysis of competitors' products, pricing strategies, and sales performance.
Optimize Listings: Well-optimized product listings are more likely to attract buyers. These tools offer keyword research and listing optimization features that improve your product's visibility on e-commerce platforms.
Manage Inventory: Efficient inventory management ensures you have the right products available at the right time, which is crucial for maintaining customer satisfaction and maximizing sales.
Whether you opt for a paid tool like JungleScout or Helium10, or a free option like 4SELLER, leveraging these tools can significantly enhance your ability to select profitable products, manage inventory effectively, and optimize your listings for better performance.
3. Initial Stock Costs
Purchasing your first batch of products involves a significant initial investment, and the amount required can vary widely depending on the type of products you choose to sell. Here’s a detailed breakdown of what to consider when estimating your initial stock costs:
Factors Influencing Initial Stock Costs
Product Type and Price: The nature of the products you choose to sell will greatly influence your initial costs. Higher-priced items tend to have less competition but require a larger upfront investment. Conversely, cheaper products are more budget-friendly but often come with higher competition.
Quantity: The number of units you decide to purchase initially is another major factor. A common recommendation for new sellers is to start with 200-500 units. This range allows you to test the market demand without overcommitting financially.
Calculating Initial Costs
To estimate your initial stock costs, you need to multiply the quantity of units by the purchase price per unit. Here’s a simplified formula:
Initial Stock Cost=Quantity×Purchase Price per UnitInitial Stock Cost=Quantity×Purchase Price per Unit
For instance, if you decide to buy 300 units of a product that costs $5 per unit, your initial stock cost would be:
300 units×$5/unit=$1,500300 units×$5/unit=$1,500
Typical Budget Ranges for New Sellers
Low Budget: If you’re starting with a tighter budget, you might opt for products with a lower purchase price. For example, if you choose items costing around $2 per unit and purchase 200 units, your initial cost would be $400.
Moderate Budget: A more common range for new sellers is between $1,000 and $3,000. This allows for a balance between purchasing a reasonable quantity of units and managing the risk of unsold inventory. For example, buying 400 units at $5 per unit would total $2,000.
Higher Budget: With a larger budget, you can consider higher-priced items that might have less competition. For instance, purchasing 300 units at $10 per unit would result in an initial cost of $3,000.
Why Initial Stock Costs are Important
Understanding and planning for initial stock costs is critical because it ensures you are adequately prepared for the financial outlay required to launch your business. Here are a few reasons why this is essential:
Market Testing: Buying an appropriate number of units allows you to test market demand without over-investing. This way, you can gauge the product's popularity and adjust future orders accordingly.
Cash Flow Management: Proper planning helps manage your cash flow effectively. Ensuring you have enough funds to cover initial stock costs, along with other expenses like marketing and shipping, is crucial for maintaining business operations.
Risk Mitigation: Starting with a moderate quantity of units helps minimize the risk of unsold inventory, which can tie up capital and lead to losses. It’s better to start small, analyze performance, and scale up gradually.
Carefully estimating and planning for your initial stock costs is a vital step in setting up your e-commerce business. By understanding the factors that influence these costs and budgeting accordingly, you can make informed decisions that set the foundation for a successful venture. Whether you have a limited budget or can invest more significantly, strategic planning will help you manage risks and maximize your chances of success.
4. UPC Codes
UPC stands for Universal Product Code, a standardized barcode used by retailers, including Amazon, to track products. Obtaining UPC codes is a critical step in setting up your products for sale. Here’s a detailed explanation of why you need them, where to get them, and the associated costs.
What are UPC Codes?
Definition: UPC codes are unique identifiers assigned to products. Each code consists of a series of black bars and a corresponding 12-digit number that can be scanned by barcode readers.
Purpose: These codes help retailers manage inventory, streamline the checkout process, and track sales. For e-commerce platforms like Amazon, UPC codes ensure each product is uniquely identifiable, reducing errors and simplifying logistics.
Where to Buy UPC Codes
Official Source: GS1: The Global Standards 1 (GS1) organization is the official provider of UPC codes. Purchasing from GS1 ensures the authenticity and uniqueness of your codes, which is crucial for compliance with Amazon’s policies.
Why GS1?: While there are third-party sellers offering UPC codes at lower prices, these codes might not always be unique or compliant with GS1 standards. Using GS1 guarantees that your UPCs are globally recognized and legitimate, preventing potential issues with listing products on Amazon.
Cost of UPC Codes
Initial Purchase: GS1 sells UPC codes in packs. A pack of 10 UPCs costs $250 initially. This upfront cost covers the registration and issuance of the codes.
Annual Renewal Fee: In addition to the initial purchase cost, there is a $50 annual renewal fee. This fee ensures your codes remain active and your registration with GS1 stays current.
Breakdown of Costs
Initial Cost: For a pack of 10 UPC codes, the initial cost is $250.
Annual Renewal: The $50 annual renewal fee applies every year to maintain your codes.
Example Calculation:
If you purchase a pack of 10 UPCs, your total cost for the first year would be:
$250 (initial cost)+$50 (annual renewal fee)=$300$250 (initial cost)+$50 (annual renewal fee)=$300
In subsequent years, you will only pay the $50 renewal fee to keep your UPCs active.
Why UPC Codes are Important
Inventory Management: UPC codes play a crucial role in inventory management, allowing you to track stock levels accurately. This helps prevent stockouts and overstock situations.
Product Identification: Each UPC code is unique to a specific product, ensuring that Amazon and other retailers can correctly identify and catalog your items. This reduces the risk of listing errors and mix-ups.
Compliance and Credibility: Using GS1-issued UPC codes ensures compliance with Amazon’s listing requirements. This adds credibility to your listings and prevents potential issues that might arise from using unauthorized codes.
Efficiency and Automation: UPC codes facilitate the automation of various processes, including checkout, shipping, and inventory updates. This enhances operational efficiency and reduces manual workload.
Investing in UPC codes from GS1 is an essential step for any e-commerce business aiming to sell on platforms like Amazon. The initial cost of $250 for a pack of 10 UPCs, along with the $50 annual renewal fee, ensures that your products are uniquely identifiable and compliant with global standards. This investment not only helps in effective inventory management but also enhances the credibility and efficiency of your business operations.
5. Shipping and Distribution Costs
Shipping and distribution costs are critical components of your overall budget when selling on Amazon. These costs encompass various fees and charges that ensure your products reach Amazon’s warehouses and, ultimately, your customers. Here’s a detailed breakdown of what to consider and how these costs can impact your business.
Components of Shipping and Distribution Costs
Shipping to Amazon’s Warehouse: This involves the costs of transporting your products from your supplier to Amazon’s fulfillment centers. Factors influencing these costs include the size and weight of your products, the shipping method, and the distance between the supplier and the warehouse.
Packaging: Proper packaging is essential to protect your products during transit. This includes boxes, cushioning materials, and labeling.
Inspection Fees: To ensure quality and compliance with Amazon’s standards, you might need to pay for product inspections before they are shipped.
Import Duties and Taxes: If you are importing products from another country, customs duties and taxes will apply. These costs vary based on the product category and the country of origin.
Estimated Shipping Costs by Product Size
Small Items: For smaller products, shipping costs are generally lower. On average, you can expect to pay around $4 per unit for shipping.
Mid-sized Products: For larger or heavier items, shipping costs increase. These costs can range from $8 to $12 per unit, depending on the specific dimensions and weight of the products.
Amazon FBA Fees
Fulfillment by Amazon (FBA) Fees: Once your products are in Amazon’s warehouse, the company handles storage, packaging, and shipping to customers. Amazon charges FBA fees for these services, which are based on the size and weight of the product.
Small and Light Items: FBA fees for smaller items typically range from $2.92 to $6.13 per unit.
Larger Items: For bigger or heavier products, FBA fees can be higher, reflecting the additional handling and shipping costs.
Breakdown of Costs
Shipping Costs to Amazon’s Warehouse:
Small items: $4 per unit
Mid-sized items: $8-$12 per unit
Amazon FBA Fees:
Small items: $2.92-$6.13 per unit
Larger items: Higher fees depending on size and weight
Example Calculation
If you are shipping 300 small items to Amazon’s warehouse, with each unit costing $4 to ship and an average FBA fee of $4.50, your total costs would be:
Shipping to Warehouse: 300 units×$4/unit=$1,200300 units×$4/unit=$1,200
FBA Fees: 300 units×$4.50/unit=$1,350300 units×$4.50/unit=$1,350
Total Shipping and Distribution Costs:
$1,200 (shipping)+$1,350 (FBA fees)=$2,550$1,200 (shipping)+$1,350 (FBA fees)=$2,550
Why Shipping and Distribution Costs are Important
Budget Planning: Understanding and accurately estimating these costs is crucial for budgeting and financial planning. Unexpected expenses can significantly impact your profitability.
Pricing Strategy: These costs need to be factored into your pricing strategy to ensure you maintain healthy profit margins. Underestimating shipping and distribution costs can erode your margins and affect your competitiveness.
Customer Satisfaction: Efficient shipping and distribution are key to timely delivery and customer satisfaction. Using Amazon FBA ensures reliable and fast shipping, which can enhance your seller ratings and lead to repeat business.
Operational Efficiency: Managing these costs effectively can streamline your operations and improve cash flow. By optimizing packaging, negotiating better shipping rates, and accurately forecasting demand, you can reduce expenses and improve efficiency.
Shipping and distribution costs are a significant part of your overall expenses when selling on Amazon. By carefully estimating these costs, including packaging, inspection fees, import duties, and Amazon FBA fees, you can better manage your budget and pricing strategy. Understanding these costs helps ensure smooth operations, enhances customer satisfaction, and supports your business's profitability and growth.
6. Inventory Storage Costs
Inventory storage costs are a critical consideration when using Amazon’s Fulfillment by Amazon (FBA) service. These fees are based on the size and quantity of your inventory stored in Amazon’s warehouses and vary throughout the year. Here’s a detailed breakdown of these costs and their implications for your business.
Amazon’s Storage Fees
Amazon charges monthly storage fees that depend on the size category of your products (standard-size or oversized) and the time of year. The fees are higher during the holiday season (October to December) due to increased demand for warehouse space.
Standard-Size Storage Fees
January to September: $0.83 per cubic foot
October to December: $2.40 per cubic foot
Oversized Storage Fees
January to September: $0.53 per cubic foot
October to December: $1.20 per cubic foot
Calculating Storage Costs
To estimate your storage costs, you need to know the cubic footage of your inventory. Here’s how you can calculate it:
Cubic Footage=Length×Width×HeightCubic Footage=Length×Width×Height
Once you have the cubic footage, multiply it by the applicable storage fee rate.
Example Calculation for Standard-Size Products
Let’s say you have 500 units of a product, each measuring 1 cubic foot. Your storage costs would be:
January to September: 500 cubic feet×$0.83/cubic foot=$415500 cubic feet×$0.83/cubic foot=$415
October to December: 500 cubic feet×$2.40/cubic foot=$1,200500 cubic feet×$2.40/cubic foot=$1,200
Example Calculation for Oversized Products
If you have 200 units of an oversized product, each measuring 3 cubic feet, your storage costs would be:
January to September: 600 cubic feet×$0.53/cubic foot=$318600 cubic feet×$0.53/cubic foot=$318
October to December: 600 cubic feet×$1.20/cubic foot=$720600 cubic feet×$1.20/cubic foot=$720
Why Inventory Storage Costs Matter
Budget Management: Accurately estimating storage costs is crucial for budgeting and financial planning. These costs can add up, especially during peak seasons, impacting your overall profitability.
Inventory Turnover: High storage costs can incentivize better inventory management practices, such as maintaining optimal stock levels and ensuring a higher inventory turnover rate. This helps in reducing long-term storage fees and minimizing the risk of overstocking.
Seasonal Planning: Knowing that storage fees increase during the holiday season can help you plan your inventory levels more effectively. You might choose to stock up on faster-moving items or reduce slower-moving inventory before the fees increase.
Cost Control: By understanding these fees, you can implement strategies to minimize them, such as reducing the size of your packaging, negotiating better storage terms, or using other fulfillment centers if necessary.
Strategies to Manage Storage Costs
Optimize Inventory Levels: Maintain a balance between having enough stock to meet demand and avoiding excess inventory that incurs high storage costs.
Seasonal Adjustments: Plan your inventory levels based on seasonal fluctuations in storage fees, ensuring you minimize costs during peak periods.
Efficient Packaging: Use packaging that minimizes space without compromising product safety. Smaller packaging reduces the cubic footage and, consequently, storage fees.
FBA Inventory Management: Use Amazon’s inventory management tools to monitor and adjust your stock levels based on sales data and forecasts.
Inventory storage costs are an important aspect of selling on Amazon using FBA. These costs, varying by product size and season, can significantly impact your business’s profitability. By accurately estimating these fees and implementing strategies to manage and reduce them, you can optimize your inventory management and control expenses effectively. Understanding and planning for these costs will help ensure a smoother and more profitable operation.

1. Platform Commission

When selling on Amazon, it’s essential to account for the platform commission, known as the referral fee. This fee is a percentage of each sale and varies by product category. Understanding these fees is crucial for pricing your products and calculating your profit margins.
Amazon’s Referral Fees
Amazon charges a referral fee on each sale made through its platform. The percentage varies depending on the product category. Here are some common examples:
Electronics: 8%
Beauty Products: 15%
Books: 15%
Clothing and Accessories: 17%
Home and Kitchen: 15%
How Referral Fees Are Calculated
The referral fee is calculated as a percentage of the total sales price, which includes the item price and any shipping or gift wrap charges.
Referral Fee=Sales Price×Referral Fee PercentageReferral Fee=Sales Price×Referral Fee Percentage
Example Calculations
Electronics: If you sell a gadget for $100, the referral fee would be: $100×8%=$8$100×8%=$8
Beauty Products: If you sell a skincare product for $50, the referral fee would be: $50×15%=$7.50$50×15%=$7.50
Why Platform Commission is Important
Pricing Strategy: Knowing the referral fee helps you set your product prices appropriately to ensure you cover costs and achieve desired profit margins.
Profit Margin Calculation: Understanding the commission allows you to accurately calculate your net profit after deducting all fees.
Category Selection: The commission rate can influence your decision on which product categories to focus on. Lower commission rates in certain categories might lead to higher profitability.
Competitive Pricing: Factoring in the referral fee ensures your prices remain competitive while still being profitable.
Impact on Different Product Categories
High-Commission Categories: Categories like beauty products and clothing with higher referral fees require careful pricing to maintain profitability. High fees can significantly impact margins, especially for low-cost items.
Low-Commission Categories: Categories like electronics with lower referral fees can offer better profit margins, but these categories might also have higher competition.
Strategies to Manage Referral Fees
Optimize Pricing: Adjust your pricing to ensure it covers all costs, including the referral fee, while remaining attractive to customers.
Product Selection: Consider the referral fee when selecting products to sell. Products in categories with lower fees might be more profitable.
Bundle Products: Creating product bundles can help increase the average sales price, potentially offsetting the impact of the referral fee.
Platform commission is a significant cost factor when selling on Amazon. By understanding the referral fee structure and calculating these fees accurately, you can make informed decisions about pricing, product selection, and profitability. Properly managing and accounting for these fees ensures your business remains competitive and financially sustainable on the Amazon platform.
8. Advertising Costs
Advertising is a crucial component of your e-commerce strategy, driving visibility and sales for your products on Amazon. Effective advertising can help you reach potential customers quickly, but it requires a financial investment. Here’s a detailed breakdown of advertising costs, strategies, and their impact on your business.
Types of Advertising
Amazon Advertising: The primary form of advertising on Amazon is Pay-Per-Click (PPC) ads. These ads appear in search results and on product detail pages, allowing you to target specific keywords and audiences.
Sponsored Products: These ads promote individual product listings and appear in search results and product pages.
Sponsored Brands: These ads feature your brand logo, a custom headline, and multiple products.
Sponsored Display: These ads target audiences both on and off Amazon, helping to re-engage shoppers who have viewed your products.
Off-Amazon Advertising: To broaden your reach, you can also advertise on social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram. These platforms allow for targeted advertising based on demographics, interests, and behaviors.
Budgeting for Advertising
A typical budget for new sellers on Amazon ranges from $700 to $1,000. This budget should cover various advertising strategies, including PPC campaigns and social media ads.
Cost Breakdown
Amazon PPC Ads:
Sponsored Products: These are the most common and can cost anywhere from $0.10 to $2.00 per click, depending on the competitiveness of your keywords.
Sponsored Brands: These ads generally cost more per click due to their higher visibility and brand promotion capabilities.
Sponsored Display: Costs vary but can be effective for retargeting potential customers.
Social Media Advertising:
Facebook Ads: Costs typically range from $0.50 to $2.00 per click, depending on targeting options and competition.
Instagram Ads: Similar to Facebook, Instagram ad costs range from $0.50 to $2.00 per click, with the advantage of visual storytelling through images and videos.
Example Budget Allocation
Let’s allocate a $1,000 advertising budget across different platforms:
Amazon PPC Ads: $600
Sponsored Products: $400
Sponsored Brands: $150
Sponsored Display: $50
Social Media Ads: $400
Facebook Ads: $200
Instagram Ads: $200
Why Advertising is Important
Increased Visibility: Advertising ensures your products appear in front of potential buyers, increasing the likelihood of sales.
Competitive Edge: With many sellers on Amazon, advertising helps you stand out and reach customers who might otherwise not find your products.
Sales Velocity: Effective advertising can boost your sales velocity, improving your product rankings and increasing organic visibility over time.
Strategies for Effective Advertising
Keyword Research: Use tools like Amazon’s Keyword Planner or third-party tools to identify high-performing keywords for your PPC campaigns.
A/B Testing: Continuously test different ad creatives, headlines, and targeting options to find the most effective combinations.
Monitor and Optimize: Regularly review your ad performance data to optimize your campaigns. Adjust bids, pause underperforming keywords, and allocate more budget to high-performing ads.
Leverage Social Media: Use Facebook and Instagram to build brand awareness and drive traffic to your Amazon listings. Engaging content, such as videos and customer testimonials, can enhance ad performance.
Advertising is a vital part of your e-commerce strategy on Amazon and beyond. Allocating a budget of $700 to $1,000 for advertising can significantly enhance your product visibility and drive sales. By utilizing Amazon PPC ads and leveraging social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram, you can reach a broader audience and increase your chances of success. Effective advertising requires continuous monitoring and optimization, but the investment can lead to substantial returns in terms of sales growth and brand recognition.
9. Returns and Refunds
Managing returns and refunds is an inevitable part of selling on Amazon. While they can impact your profitability, understanding the associated costs and implementing effective management strategies can help mitigate their effects. Here’s a detailed breakdown of the costs and considerations involved in handling returns and refunds.
Amazon Return Processing Fees
Amazon charges a return processing fee that varies depending on the product’s size and weight. This fee is applied when a customer returns a product, and it covers the cost of handling and processing the return.
Standard-Size Products: Fees for standard-size products are typically lower due to their smaller dimensions and weight.
Oversized Products: Fees for oversized products are higher because of the additional handling and storage space required.
Example Fee Structure
Standard-Size Product Return Fee: Approximately $2 to $5 per unit, depending on the specific dimensions and weight.
Oversized Product Return Fee: Approximately $5 to $20 per unit, depending on the specific dimensions and weight.
Additional Costs of Returns and Refunds
Restocking Fees: Amazon may charge a restocking fee for certain returned items. This fee is deducted from the refund amount and can range from 10% to 20% of the item’s price.
Return Shipping Costs: In some cases, you may be responsible for covering the cost of return shipping, especially if the return is due to a defect or error on your part.
Product Condition: Returned items that are not in resellable condition may need to be disposed of or liquidated, leading to additional losses.
Why Returns and Refunds Matter
Customer Satisfaction: Efficient handling of returns and refunds is crucial for maintaining high levels of customer satisfaction and positive reviews. Poor management can lead to negative feedback and damage your seller reputation.
Cost Management: Understanding and anticipating the costs associated with returns can help you better manage your budget and pricing strategy, ensuring you account for these potential expenses.
Inventory Control: Effective return management helps maintain accurate inventory levels and reduces the risk of overstocking or stockouts.
Strategies to Manage Returns and Refunds
Clear Product Descriptions: Provide detailed and accurate product descriptions to reduce the likelihood of returns due to customer dissatisfaction or misunderstandings.
Quality Control: Implement rigorous quality control measures to minimize defects and errors that could lead to returns.
Customer Service: Offer excellent customer service to address issues promptly and potentially resolve problems without necessitating a return.
Return Policies: Establish clear and fair return policies that balance customer satisfaction with protecting your business from excessive costs.
Example Calculation
Let’s consider you sell 100 units of a product, with an average return rate of 5%. Here’s how you can calculate the potential costs:
Product Price: $50 per unit
Return Rate: 5% (5 units)
Return Processing Fee: $3 per unit
Restocking Fee: 15% of the product price ($7.50 per unit)
Return Shipping Cost: $5 per unit
Total Return and Refund Costs:
Return Processing Fee=5 units×$3=$15Return Processing Fee=5 units×$3=$15 Restocking Fee=5 units×$7.50=$37.50Restocking Fee=5 units×$7.50=$37.50 Return Shipping Cost=5 units×$5=$25Return Shipping Cost=5 units×$5=$25
Total Costs:
$15+$37.50+$25=$77.50$15+$37.50+$25=$77.50
Handling returns and refunds is a necessary aspect of selling on Amazon, and the associated costs can add up quickly. By understanding the fees and implementing strategies to manage returns effectively, you can minimize their impact on your profitability. Clear product descriptions, stringent quality control, excellent customer service, and well-defined return policies can all contribute to reducing return rates and associated costs. Efficient return management not only helps maintain customer satisfaction but also supports better cost control and inventory management.

1. Miscellaneous Expenses

In addition to the primary costs associated with setting up and running your Amazon business, there are several miscellaneous expenses that can significantly impact your budget. These costs, while often overlooked, are crucial for creating a professional and efficient operation. Here’s a detailed breakdown of these potential expenses and their importance.
Graphic Design for Product Listings
Importance: High-quality graphics and well-designed product listings are essential for attracting customers and conveying professionalism. Poorly designed listings can deter potential buyers.
Costs: Hiring a freelance graphic designer can cost between $50 and $200 per listing, depending on the complexity and the designer's experience.
Services: Graphic design services might include creating product images, infographics, and enhanced brand content (EBC) that highlights your product's features and benefits.
Professional Photography
Importance: Professional photos can make a significant difference in how your product is perceived. High-quality images help build trust with customers and increase conversion rates.
Costs: Professional product photography can range from $100 to $500 per product, depending on the number of images and the photographer’s expertise.
Services: This may include standard product shots, lifestyle images showing the product in use, and detailed close-ups of key features.
Virtual Assistant (VA) Services
Importance: Hiring a virtual assistant can help manage various tasks, such as customer service, inventory management, and order processing. This can free up your time to focus on strategic growth.
Costs: VAs typically charge between $10 and $30 per hour, depending on their skill level and the tasks they perform.
Services: Tasks handled by VAs can include responding to customer inquiries, updating product listings, managing social media accounts, and handling administrative duties.
Other Potential Miscellaneous Expenses
Subscription Services: Tools and software subscriptions for keyword research, inventory management, and sales analytics can cost anywhere from $20 to $200 per month.
Legal and Accounting Services: Professional advice for legal and tax matters is crucial. This can include incorporating your business, trademark registration, and tax preparation, costing several hundred dollars annually.
Packaging Design: Custom packaging design can enhance your brand image and customer experience. Costs can range from $100 to $500, depending on the complexity of the design.
Marketing and Promotional Materials: Additional marketing efforts, such as email campaigns, social media ads, and promotional giveaways, can also add to your expenses.
Example Budget Allocation
Let’s break down a potential budget for these miscellaneous expenses:
Graphic Design: $150 per listing for 5 listings = $750
Professional Photography: $300 per product for 3 products = $900
Virtual Assistant: $20 per hour for 10 hours per month = $200 per month
Subscription Services: $100 per month
Legal and Accounting Services: $500 annually
Packaging Design: $300
Marketing and Promotional Materials: $200 per month
Annual Costs:
Graphic Design=$750Graphic Design=$750 Professional Photography=$900Professional Photography=$900 Virtual Assistant=$200×12=$2,400Virtual Assistant=$200×12=$2,400 Subscription Services=$100×12=$1,200Subscription Services=$100×12=$1,200 Legal and Accounting Services=$500Legal and Accounting Services=$500 Packaging Design=$300Packaging Design=$300 Marketing and Promotional Materials=$200×12=$2,400Marketing and Promotional Materials=$200×12=$2,400
Total Annual Miscellaneous Expenses:
$750+$900+$2,400+$1,200+$500+$300+$2,400=$8,450$750+$900+$2,400+$1,200+$500+$300+$2,400=$8,450
Why Miscellaneous Expenses Matter
Professionalism and Trust: Investing in professional services like graphic design and photography enhances your product listings and builds trust with potential customers.
Efficiency and Focus: Hiring a virtual assistant allows you to delegate time-consuming tasks, enabling you to focus on growing your business.
Operational Smoothness: Subscriptions to essential tools and professional legal and accounting services ensure your business operates smoothly and compliantly.
Brand Building: Custom packaging and marketing materials contribute to a strong brand identity, which can lead to increased customer loyalty and repeat business.
Miscellaneous expenses, while sometimes overlooked, play a vital role in the success of your Amazon business. By budgeting for high-quality graphic design, professional photography, virtual assistant services, and other essential tools and services, you can create a professional and efficient operation. These investments not only enhance your product listings and customer experience but also free up your time to focus on strategic growth, ultimately contributing to your business's long-term success.
Summary
Setting up and running an Amazon business involves various costs that need careful consideration to ensure profitability and efficiency. Here’s a summary of the key cost components:
Product Selection Tools: Essential for choosing profitable products, with popular tools like JungleScout ($49/month) and Helium10 ($79/month). Free alternatives like 4SELLER also provide valuable features for product selection and inventory management.
Initial Stock Costs: Depending on the product type and quantity, initial stock costs can range from $1,000 to $3,000. Starting with 200-500 units is recommended to test the market without overcommitting financially.
UPC Codes: Necessary for product tracking, these should be purchased from GS1. A pack of 10 UPC codes costs $250 initially, plus a $50 annual renewal fee.
Shipping and Distribution Costs: Includes fees for shipping products to Amazon’s warehouse and Amazon’s Fulfillment by Amazon (FBA) fees, which range from $2.92 to $6.13 per unit. Shipping small items might cost around $4 per unit, while mid-sized products could cost $8-$12 per unit.
Inventory Storage Costs: Monthly fees for storing products in Amazon’s warehouse vary by size and season. Standard-size storage costs $0.83 per cubic foot from January to September and $2.40 per cubic foot from October to December. Oversized storage costs $0.53 per cubic foot and $1.20 per cubic foot during these periods, respectively.
Platform Commission: Amazon takes a commission on each sale, typically between 8% and 15%, depending on the product category. For instance, electronics have a referral fee of 8%, while beauty products have a fee of 15%.
Advertising Costs: To drive visibility and sales, set aside $700-$1,000 for advertising. This includes Amazon PPC ads and potentially social media ads on platforms like Facebook and Instagram.
Returns and Refunds: Handling returns incurs costs, including Amazon’s return processing fee, restocking fees, and return shipping costs. These fees vary based on product size and weight.
Miscellaneous Expenses: Other costs include graphic design for product listings ($50-$200 per listing), professional photography ($100-$500 per product), and virtual assistant services ($10-$30 per hour). Additional expenses may include subscription services, legal and accounting services, packaging design, and marketing materials.
In total, you'll need at least $5,000 to start an Amazon FBA business today. Plus, you'll need to spend a lot of time managing your store and optimizing your product listings. This includes continuously monitoring your sales performance, tweaking your advertising strategies, and keeping an eye on competitors to stay ahead in the market.
By understanding and planning for these costs, you can effectively manage your Amazon business, ensuring it remains profitable and efficient while maintaining high levels of customer satisfaction.

Costs of living have gotten insane. The apartment I used to rent eight years ago for $600 is now $1800. My partner and I qualify for "cheap" housing, but a "cheap" mortgage with no other bills factored in is $2500 a month - I could not afford it by myself, and if my partner breaks a bone and can't work we'd be homeless in no time.
I'm not the only person who's ranted about how greed has destroyed so much of our lives. I'm just another person feeling the effects of it all. I was born into poverty, didn't want to raise kids in it. Now I'm mourning the fact that I will never be able to afford to have kids, despite on paper being what should be 'middle class'. If I had been born twenty years sooner, I could have easily afforded a home and a family. I can't afford a $20,000 bill for a hospital birth, and I can't afford a $5000 bill for a home birth where I would be fucking scared of something going wrong and leading to a worse hospital bill.
I'm extremely depressed and wanted to do therapy, but I can't even afford that. Even Betterhelp which reviews say isn't actually good is close to $400 a month. There are therapists that offer a sliding scale, but they only look at how much you make monthly and not all of the bills like car insurance/phone bills/utilities/groceries that swallow each of my paychecks with greedy gulps. I have to scrimp and save for a doctor's visit to hopefully get put on some antidepressants, and then I have to hope the side effects of said medication aren't so bad this time/actually work.
It's a knife to the gut when people ask us when we're having kids, because we'd make great parents. I get this overwhelming feeling of loss in my heart when I see families with kids out and about. Maybe in the future prices will settle down, and things will be affordable. But by then my biological clock would have run out of time. Adoption/fostering could be an option if we ever manage to get a house- though even getting a fixer upper at this point is damn near $400,000. All while we both work with no days off together, only seeing each other briefly in the evenings. I barely can see my friends because we all work opposite days and shifts.
TW: suicide
I don't think I can keep living in this world. I can't keep making money for other people to get richer while they find any reason they can to weasel out of giving raises. I worked at a nursing home during the height of Covid, where raises were promised yearly. We didn't get a raise or any hazard pay for two years. Our 'covid bonus' was a $100, which was what we usually got for a Christmas bonus, and there was no Christmas bonus that year. You can work hard, but if someone doesn't want to give you extra money or appreciation for your work you can't make them. Things are not going to get better on their own, but the people with power to change things don't care and I as an average person can't make them.
I feel so trapped and helpless. I feel priced out of a good life. I can't maintain this pace. I have nothing to look forward to in the future. I only see things getting worse. I have struggled mentally and financially my entire life. Until I met my partner I was going through life on my own barely treading water. And while they are a lifejacket I'm tired of being in the water- I want to be on the shore. I want solid ground beneath my feet that I can call my home. I'm not asking for a mansion with a pool, I'm asking for a two bedroom home. When we go on zillow we look at the price histories, and the prices have spiked by the hundred thousands. And since the people who can afford them have no problem paying that price, why would people selling drop the rates when they can make a half million off a home they bought for $120,000 a decade ago?
There's nothing for me in the future. Nothing but more heartache and I've more than had my fill of that. I'm dragging myself along for my partners sake, but I'm so close to finally giving up. Mother's day was fucking rough and this week has been incredibly hard. I 100% get why people abuse substances to escape their lives, and I'm struggling not to fall into that same pit. Here's hoping I can get that doctors appointment soon, and that the medication actually helps. Because right now... I don't see the point of living.