Hey Reddit,
I (45M) am in a bit of a moral dilemma and need your unbiased opinions. To give you some context, I am a single father to my son, Jake (17M). Jake has been a Red Bull fanatic for the past couple of years. It all started innocently enough—he'd have a can now and then to stay awake for studying or sports. But recently, his consumption had skyrocketed to dangerous levels. He was drinking six to seven cans a day.
I did some research and found out that Red Bull is incredibly unhealthy. It can cause heart palpitations, high blood pressure, anxiety, and even sudden cardiac arrest. The amount of caffeine and sugar in those things is off the charts. I knew I had to do something before it ruined his health.
But here's where things get complicated. I work in the pharmaceutical industry, and through a series of work-related mishaps and bad influences, I've been exposed to a lot of hardcore drugs. I know firsthand how they affect the body, both positively and negatively. After weighing the pros and cons, I came to the conclusion that while drugs like meth, cocaine, and fentanyl have their own risks, they don't carry the same everyday dangers as the constant high caffeine intake from energy drinks.
So, I made a controversial decision. Instead of letting him guzzle down can after can of Red Bull, I started introducing him to small doses of these other substances. I began with meth, just a tiny bit to keep him awake and focused. Then, I added in cocaine for those times he needed an extra boost of energy. Fentanyl was a bit trickier, but with careful monitoring and controlled doses, I figured it could be managed.
At first, Jake was hesitant, but after some convincing, he started to see the benefits. His energy levels were more consistent, he wasn't crashing like he did with Red Bull, and he seemed more productive overall. However, the doses soon had to be increased to maintain the same effects. What started as a half-milligram of meth turned into a gram a day. Cocaine went from a bump here and there to several lines throughout the day. Fentanyl... well, that one was the most dangerous, and I had to constantly monitor him to make sure he wasn't overdoing it. But I believed it was still safer than chugging those energy drinks.
Jake's friends and teachers began to notice the changes. He became more withdrawn, his grades fluctuated wildly, and he lost a significant amount of weight. When confronted, I always explained my reasoning—that I was protecting him from the hidden dangers of energy drinks. But no one seemed to understand.
Last week, my ex-wife found out. She went ballistic, threatening to take full custody and report me to the authorities. She claims I am endangering Jake's life and that my actions are far worse than letting him drink Red Bull.
So, Reddit, AITA for getting my son off Red Bull and introducing him to meth, cocaine, and fentanyl instead? I genuinely believe I was acting in his best interest, considering the severe health risks associated with energy drinks. But now, I'm questioning my decision.
TL;DR: Got my son off dangerous energy drinks by introducing him to controlled doses of meth, cocaine, and fentanyl. Now everyone thinks I'm the bad guy. AITA?

According to the flow chart, I’m looking for a canister or upright vacuum with electric nozzle. We’ve got about 50% carpet-hardwood, BUT, probably 25% of the hardwood is covered with area rugs. Also, half the carpet is upstairs and includes the stairs. Would like to stay at or under $500.
Currently use a Tineco S5 to accomplish most of the hardwood floor, so really just need something for area rugs and medium pile bedroom carpets. Allergies and pets are big considerations.
Been reading through this sub but overwhelmed by the options and seems like an investment purchase at this point. We’re coming from a Shark and also have a dyson stick, both of which can’t handle the pet hair and toddler situation any longer. I’d greatly appreciate any advice!

I will be taking over as president for my university's investment club this year, and part of that is creating weekly powerpoints to teach people about investing. I whipped up this mini curriculum for the semester to try and get a condensed, comprehensive idea of what investing is all about. Please give any notes you have on anything that I should add/drop from this. Apologies if this post breaks any rules.
Week 1: Introduction to Investing

• **Why Invest?**: Importance of investing, inflation, and the power of compound interest.
• **Types of Investments**: Stocks, bonds, mutual funds, ETFs, real estate, and commodities.
• **Risk and Return**: Basic concepts of risk and return, risk tolerance, and the risk-return tradeoff.

Week 2: Understanding the Stock Market

• **How the Stock Market Works**: Stock exchanges, major indices (S&P 500, Dow Jones, NASDAQ).
• **Market Participants**: Retail investors, institutional investors, market makers.
• **Order Types**: Market orders, limit orders, stop-loss orders.

Week 3: Fundamental Analysis

• **Financial Statements**: Income statement, balance sheet, cash flow statement.
• **Key Ratios**: P/E ratio, P/B ratio, ROE, and others.
• **Qualitative Factors**: Management quality, competitive advantage, industry analysis.

Week 4: Technical Analysis

• **Charts and Trends**: Reading stock charts, identifying trends.
• **Technical Indicators**: Moving averages, RSI, MACD.
• **Patterns**: Support and resistance levels, head and shoulders, double tops and bottoms.

Week 5: Portfolio Management and Diversification

• **Asset Allocation**: Diversification across asset classes.
• **Risk Management**: Hedging strategies, correlation between assets.
• **Rebalancing**: When and how to rebalance a portfolio.

Week 6: Bonds and Fixed Income Investments

• **Types of Bonds**: Government bonds, corporate bonds, municipal bonds.
• **Bond Ratings and Yield**: Credit ratings, yield to maturity, current yield.
• **Interest Rate Risk**: Impact of interest rates on bond prices.

Week 7: Mutual Funds and ETFs

• **Mutual Funds**: Types, advantages and disadvantages, fees.
• **ETFs**: Differences from mutual funds, how they are traded, benefits.
• **Index Funds**: Advantages of passive investing, popular index funds.

Week 8: Behavioral Effects on Market / Consumer Sentiment

• **Common Biases**: Overconfidence, anchoring, herd behavior.
• **Market Anomalies**: Bubbles, crashes, irrational exuberance.
• **Strategies to Mitigate Biases**: Systematic investing, checklists, diversified portfolios.

Week 9: Macroeconomic Indicators and Their Impact on Markets

• **Key Indicators**: GDP, inflation, unemployment, interest rates.
• **Central Banks and Monetary Policy**: Role of central banks, tools of monetary policy.
• **Global Events**: How international events affect the markets.
• **Election years?**

Week 10: Introduction to Financial Derivatives

• **Options**: Calls, puts, how options work, basic strategies.
• **Futures**: Futures contracts, hedging with futures.
• **Risks of Derivatives**: Leverage, margin calls, market risk.
• **Other Derivatives?**

Week 11: Real Estate Investment

• **Types of Real Estate Investments**: Residential, commercial, REITs.
• **Evaluation Criteria**: Location, market trends, rental yields.
• **Financing and Risks**: Mortgages, interest rates, property management.

Week 12: Socially Responsible and ESG Investing

• **ESG Criteria**: Environmental, social, and governance factors.
• **Impact Investing**: Strategies for investing with a positive social impact.
• **Performance and Trends**: How ESG funds perform, growth in ESG investing.

Week 13: Developing an Investment Strategy and Staying Informed

• **Creating a Personal Investment Plan**: Setting goals, risk assessment, time horizon.
• **Research and Due Diligence**: Reliable sources of information, financial news, analyst reports.
• **Continuous Learning**: Books, courses, seminars, staying updated with market trends.

I'm not sure about ESG investing for week 12, so if anyone can think of a better topic I'm all ears. Thank you!

So about a year ago I went into my clinical settings, it said it was set to CPAP mode at 10. I changed it to APAP and gave it a range of min 10 to max 18. AHI went from averaging around 2 to always under 0.5 so I called it a win and have left it like that ever since.
Last few weeks I’ve been waking up occasionally in the night feeling like I can’t breathe. I pull off my mask, turn off my machine and turn it back on and put it back on, everything feels fine, so I assume it was psychological and go back to sleep. But since it keeps happening I uploaded my data to OSCAR to see if I can see anything weird happening.
3 things I noticed: first, unimportant but weird- where they list my “device setting changes” it shows I’ve been at the settings i set myself for the last 332 days, but for the year and a bit before that, when I had NEVER touched my clinical settings, the settings were changing constantly. But also irregularly, like sometimes every day, sometimes stayed the same for a few days. It was alternating back and forth between CPAP and APAP (min 4, max 18). Is that normal? Doesn’t actually matter though because since changing it myself it’s stayed the same. Just seems weird.
Second thing: in my daily charts it shows my pressure sitting at 6 almost always, occasionally going up to 10 briefly and then back to 6. But my min pressure is set to 10. I checked a date when it was in fixed CPAP mode of 10 and it shows the same thing. Am I just misunderstanding the concept of “minimum pressure”? Or is the chart mislabeled?
Third thing I might make a separate post about showing my charts, as it’s my primary concern, but I’ll ask it now anyway. There are times when the line in the pressure chart abruptly stops for a few minutes. Doesn’t drop, just stops. I thought maybe it’s when I turn off my machine to go pee, but all the other charts continue for a minute or so past where the pressure line stopped. It’s still showing measurable flow rate, leak rate, mask pressure etc. is that normal? Or is my machine malfunctioning and ceasing pressure randomly?
Any help understanding this would be really appreciated!

Hello, fellow adventurers!
I’ve recently launched a Cypher System bot on Discord, designed to enhance Play by Post (PbP) gaming. If you’re a fan of the Cypher System and enjoy the detailed, text-driven gameplay of PbP, this bot might be what you need. You can check it out here.

Why a Cypher System Bot?

Play-by-post gaming has always been something I enjoy. It allows for deep narrative exploration, thoughtful character development, and the flexibility to play at your own pace. However, managing game mechanics, tracking initiatives, and ensuring smooth gameplay can be challenging. That’s why I created this Cypher System bot. It takes care of the details so that you can focus on storytelling and role-playing.

Key Features of the Cypher System Bot

Here are some of the features of the bot and how they can enhance your PbP sessions:

1. Character Management: The !character command lets players display character information effortlessly, ensuring everyone is on the same page regarding stats and abilities.
2. Initiative Tracking: The !remove_initiative command helps manage combat sequences, keeping turns tracked accurately without breaking the flow of the narrative.
3. GM Intrusions: The !intrusion command handles GM intrusions smoothly, adding surprise and excitement to your sessions.
4. Difficulty Chart: The !difficulty command quickly displays the difficulty chart, aiding in real-time decision-making and ensuring everyone understands the stakes.
5. Status Updates: The !status command provides a quick overview of a character’s current state, helping both players and GMs keep track of ongoing conditions and effects.
6. Cypher Tools Compatible: The !upload command is used in combination with a .json file downloaded from the Official Cypher Tools use the “Foundry Export” button at the bottom of your completed Character sheet.

Here is a full list of commands! !check – Rolls a d20 against a difficulty number with assets, skill, and effort bonuses. !character – Displays your uploaded character sheet. !difficulty – Displays the difficulty chart. !format – Displays the format for various commands. !initiative – Rolls for initiative and tracks the order. !inittracker – Displays the current initiative order. !intrusion – Logs a GM intrusion. !remove_initiative – Removes a character from the initiative tracker. !status – Displays a quick status of your character. !upload – Uploads a character sheet in JSON format. !roll – Rolls dice in the format XdY (e.g., 1d20, 2d6). !recover – Rolls for recovery and updates the character’s stat pools. !setgm <@user> – Sets a user as the Game Master. !add – Adds points to a pool. !spend – Spends points from a pool. !removexp – Removes XP from the character. !release – Releases the character from your profile. !describe – Describes an ability or skill from the character sheet.
Type !help command for more info on a command. You can also type !help category for more info on a category.

Enhancing Your Play by Post Experience

Here are a few tips on how to maximize your PbP sessions using the bot:

1. Make Every Post a Call to Action

One of the essential aspects of PbP games is ensuring that every post prompts your players to act. There have been times when I spent hours crafting an NPC speech, only to find my players not responding. They were stuck because I hadn’t given them any clear direction. It’s important to include subtle hooks or actions in each post to keep the narrative dynamic and engaging.

2. Use Formatting to Your Advantage

Discord offers various formatting options that can enhance readability and immersion. Use bold for emphasis, italics for thoughts or internal dialogue, and blockquotes for letters or messages within the game. This helps distinguish different types of content and keeps everything clear.

3. Script and Text Blockouts for Fantasy Languages

If your campaign features different fantasy languages, you can use Discord’s text blockouts to represent this. For example:

// This is Elvish text 

This visual differentiation adds an extra layer of depth to your role-playing and helps convey the richness of your game world.

Conclusion

The Cypher System bot is designed to make your Play by Post adventures smoother, more immersive, and a lot more fun. Whether you’re a seasoned PbP veteran or just starting out, the bot offers tools and features that can elevate your game. Give it a try, and I’d love to hear how it enhances your storytelling experience!

$POWSCHE Dev and team are cooking HARD in voice chat CONTINUOUSLY FOR THE WHOLE WEEKEND NOW and you won't believe what's coming. They hinted at a Porsche lottery for $powsche holders. They teased a collab with a VERY followed Tiktok personality linked to the scene. And they are, were and always will be the first and original, category defining CAR MEMECOIN.
The narrative is real. We are linking two worlds that are destined to be linked: car aficionados and crypto entusiasts.
$POWSCHE aims to join the worlds of crypto entusiasts and car entusiasts, two worlds of luxury and riches, two worlds that unite similar kinds of people: courageous, ambitious people who are not afraid of power, not afraid to push their foot on the gas, not afraid of going too fast. Being category-defining is a heavy burden to hold. Non-believers will come at every bump in the road, questioning the project, questioning the goals, questioning the Market Cap. But what they are really questioning is themselves and their conviction.
We get it, we get it, you only trade wave one memecoins and live between times where you do a x2.5 and times where you get hopelessly rugged. But it doesn't have to be this way. Not when there's a token around which ecompasses all the perfect characteristics to become one of Solana's biggest memecoins in this bullrun.
That token is $POWSCHE. There is something about Powsche as a movement that just makes you know it's getting to 1 Bil MC. Is it the entusiasm from the holders in the TG group who know they are just waiting to get rich? Is it their religious devotion to $POWSCHE Dev, who hasn't sold a penny and is cooking in the chat everyday? Is it the raid team that reaches the first place in the raid leaderboard EVERY SINGLE TIME?
No. It's not about this. These factors, these demostrations of the community's strenght and conviction, are just an obvious consequence of the project's huge ambitions. A consequence of the vision and planning behind $POWSCHE. A consequence of its sheer originality and of its defining effect in the Solana memecoin narrative.
You saw Fewawi, Lambowghini, who knows how many other car coins coming out. But $POWSCHE is the first and original car memecoin. $POWSCHE stands for luxury, for quality, for conviction. Since this project was created in March, the Dev and top holders already knew where $POWSCHE was going. It came like a breath of fresh air, in the slum of Solana memecoins, and showed the whole space what can be achieved true the power of an informed and united community. $POWSCHE went from 40k MC to an ATH of 28 millions in less than a month. It showed all the non-believers what can be achieved when a solid, original project with a Dev that won't quit can achieve, when supported by a crazy community like ours. But no memecoin reaches greatness without bumps in the road. Study WIF, study PEPE, study BOME. All the biggest memecoins had 80-90% retracements on their way to billions of market cap. They all had slow times of accumulation at low ranges, before skyrocketing up 100-1000x in a matter of DAYS.
This is exactly what is happening with $POWSCHE. After a two-weeks downtrend, $POWSCHE is now stable on the 1-1.3 MC range, while holders grow every single day. Our ATH, which we wil be breaking on the next cycle, is already a 25x from here. But this doesn't even matter, because we all share one fundamental conviction: $POWSCHE is breaking through 100millions, and much higher from there. "Why do we have this conviction?", you could be asking. Let me explain.
One important thing to keep in mind about $POWSCHE is that we know how to create hype. We know how to get some buzz around our Coin even between non-crypto people. How?
BY BURNING A LAMBORGHINI ON LIVESTREAM AT 100MIL MC, WHILE DRIFTING A PORSCHE AROUND IT.
BY BURNING A TESLA ON LIVESTREAM AT 50MIL MC TO SHOW ELON MUSK WE ARE NOT FUCKING AROUND.
Both events will make $POWSCHE viral in a way that is yet to be seen in memecoins. And the reason why this will translate into even more money flowing into $POWSCHE is simple. That reasons is the Car Community. Car lovers are crazy, and they are everywhere. We all know at least one person getting turned on just by listening to a roaring Porsche. We also know that people with a Porsche usually have a hefty sum of money in their pockets.
Top wallets in POWSCHE are doxxed, team is well known in the community, Dev has not sold a penny and is just getting started. The foundations for our trip to the stars have been laid.
All our growth until now was community- driven and organic. But now, as the bullrun gives its first signs of life, $POWSCHE is ready to really step on the gas. Which means, we are finally starting to use our untouched marketing funds. What do you think will happen when people will see the token that touched 28 mil rise to 5 mil, 10mil, 15mil? Can you even imagine the FOMO? I don't think you can.
Financially, investing in $POWSCHE is the best choice simply because of the dev and team's know-how. They know that it's useless to market on red days, they are experienced in crypto, they know how to ensure the token's healthy growth over 100millions. One of our most active top holders is actually a blockchain engineer, and although he had MILLIONS worth of POWSCHE at its ATH, he NEVER. SOLD. A PENNY. This should speak loads about the project's integrity and the long-term vision behind it.
The expertise of our dev and top holders is also the key to understanding our community approach. The community is not just raiding and sharing the word, but it's constantly being vetted and educated. You can rest assured that if you enter $POWSCHE's tg, you'll come out of it much more knowledgeable on crypto and on memecoins in general. We try to foster a community which doesn't just hold through good times, but that can also understand and support the chart on red days. The team is always available to answer any of your doubts on $POWSCHE, Solana or the crypto world in general.
The community members on TG are growing daily, with more than 3k members currently. Meme contests, reddit contests, airdrops and rewards for holders are all frequent in our community. Your $POWSCHE bag will grow simply through your efforts in spreading the word about this new, category-defining token.
So what are you waiting for? We're not staying at 2mil for long. Come check out for yourself what the best community around is about.
NEED MONEY TO BUY PORSCHE? BUY $POWSCHE INSTEAD!
Ca: 8CkiSHHJDHJV4LUoiRMLUhqG58cUkbyJRtcP4Z3mCXNf

I've played and own all of snarling badger's main games. The other games don't seemed flushed out, rules or characters being broken. I'm worried with the hype of Deth Wizard it will be the same. So far it would be solo play and I'm fine with getting the rules to work right. I've watched the live stream with Vince and Miniac.
RiH was the succubus being the bane and an auto include.
SS 0 was the airplane boss.
Maj13 was the AI needed a flow chart to follow more clearly. Which is what I ended up making.
I wish I could read a copy to decide first. So far does the rules look cohesive? Does the model count seem cumbersome? (SS0 said 12 minis but didn't include all the campaign minis needed)

I am so confused. Use TCOYF (I know no CM records, I was casually charting while trying to find an instructor) .
I got my period, then got it AGAIN a week later post ovulation. My temp drop is saying this is day 14 of elevated temps, but didn’t I drop below my cover line?
Also how could I be pregnant when I’ve had two periods? (Like TRUE periods, with full heavy flow and the correct color of blood and clots). We had sex on CD 14, but he did not finish in me and then I immediately started bleeding heavy the next day for another period.
Now that my temp is rising again, I don’t understand how to interpret that.
Also, having such short luteal phases previously freaks me out too. That seems like a hormonal issue too.

I am building an app where multiple users can join into a room and make flow charts. I am using nestjs (socketio server) and nextjs (client, react flow for flow diagrams). And I want to make my board drawing persistent So if any users leave or refresh browser diagram get reloaded. I want to how to store this board details .Should I store inside database(redis / sqlite) or browser localstorage .

Recently ChatGPT has come up with custom GPTs section. This short tutorial shows how to use ChatGPT and Whimsical to por flowcharts using ChatGPT https://youtu.be/NuEEdqjNQCE?si=lNwNbaMUoTk6fnQf

[INDEX]
I banked the fire and stared into the golden eyes of Beatale before I crept into my makeshift tent.
I still had my auric vision running and couldn’t help but notice the thin silver cord that ran from me to Horse. Firming up my aura, I reached out with my hand and grabbed it. I could feel the nearly imperceptible vibration between my fingers as I used my mind to probe at the thread. I could feel a bright spark of intellect, a light at the end of a tunnel. Pushing with my mind, I slid down the thread until the spark grew larger and eventually filled my inner vision with a hazy white light. Horsey thoughts nudged at me curiously.
I slid into the haze and immediately lost all sense of direction. If it wasn’t for the silver thread, I’d have no idea how to exit this shifting white fog. Horsey thoughts got stronger as I followed the thread while the haze thinned and cleared to reveal an endless prairie of green grass. I found myself standing before a naked man wearing a horse mask and I stared in shock. It was obviously me wearing a cheap costume horse mask — there was no mistaking my tattoos.
“What did you expect?” Horse neighed at me. “I am you and you are me and we are all together. Goo goo ga joob.”
Horse made a shooing motion with his hands and I accelerated backwards through the white haze and slammed into my own body with a gasp. I stared at the tarp overhead for a long minute, processing this new revelation. Horse was a part of me, a piece of my spirit. Whatever psychic stuff I did with that silver cord lead me into a house of mirrors where I got to look at myself pretending to be a horse. I can’t even deal with that right now.
Rolling into my blankets, I dropped off to sleep.
*Ding*
-=- - Welcome to the Dreamworld - Included in the Psychic Skills pack, the Inner Sanctum is your psychic domain. It is the mental fortress that you must secure and maintain to defend against psychic and spiritual assaults. All of your neurosis and fears are symbolised in this realm and must be defeated or subjugated before you can become master of the domain. Good luck. -=-
I banished the pop-up and looked around. I knew I was asleep, but everything was just as real as when I was awake. I was breathing, I could feel the floor under my feet, and if it weren’t for the pop-up, I would have sworn I had been teleported. The room I was in resembled an oversized luxury prison cell, maybe a thirty foot cube. No windows. Rough stone walls with thick mortar. Large brass wall sconces were set directly into the stone and suffused the room with a warm, golden light provided by glowing rocks. The stone floor had colourful Persian rugs tastefully placed. A high plaster ceiling was painted with a rendition of Michelangelo’s ‘Creation of Adam’, depicting me as both Adam and God.
There was a comfy sofa in front of a large screen television that hung from one wall and an ornate grandfather clock ticked loudly in the corner. It was currently 10:08 PM. Another wall was a floor to ceiling bookshelf, stuffed with books of varying sizes. The third wall was covered with pictures and I could see at a glance that they were images from my life. The fourth wall had a thick riveted steel door on the right side, a full sized mirror on the left, and a computer workstation in the middle.
The picture wall was my first target. A few were quite large, nearly life sized, while others were tiny prints no larger than the palm of my hand. Scenes of my life were displayed in each one. The largest was me riding Horse with a shit-scared expression, shooting at a pack of wolves. Others were smaller, each with different frames. Some ornate gold or silver, others plain wood, a few wrapped in briars or barbed wire. Nanny Ramsey holding me as a young child. My dog Jean with a red ball in his mouth. My parents, screaming at me. I turned my attention to the books. Books are safe. Books don’t judge you.
The sweet, musty scent of a used book store filled my nostrils as I drew close to the honey coloured shelves. Hundreds of volumes filled the wall from floor to ceiling, with a ladder that could be rolled along a rail to access the top. I smiled at the sight. I had always wanted a library like this. I pulled a book at random and read the title, “Confused Fantasies about Joseph Harris, part XXIV of the Middle School Years”.
I slid the book back onto the shelf. Let’s see what’s on TV.
The remote was a slim, futuristic looking affair with a minimum of buttons. I pointed it at the television and moments later the huge screen came to life and presented me with a simple menu for movies, divided into six categories: Happy, Surprised, Afraid, Disgusted, Angry, and Sad. I scrolled through the offerings for a minute, reading the titles and reviews about the movies of my life. It really bothered me that there were so few selections in the Happy section.
The number of Sad movies increased by one.
I walked over to the mirror and noticed there was a small sticky note pasted to it. “Astral Realm. Experienced users only.” I shoved the note in my pocket and stared at my image. Sturdy black boots, black denim jeans and shirt with mother-of-pearl buttons, deep brown gun belt slung at my hip, red bandanna and black felt hat. All I needed was a pencil moustache and I would look like the stereotypical villain in any spaghetti western. At that very moment I decided to grow out a goatee. I’d rather be mistaken for a bad guy than a victim.
So how does this astral realm thing work?
The mirror appeared to be nothing more than a mirror. It was cold, smooth glass surrounded by a wrought iron frame, and reflected my image. I didn’t necessarily want to go walking into danger, but I wanted to know how it worked. I pushed and prodded the glass in frustration until I noticed my image grinning at me. I jumped back in surprise and it doubled over in silent laughter.
“Hilarious, dude. You got me,” I huffed. “So how do I get in?”
My mirror-self tipped his hat and stepped to side.
I reached up to the mirror again and my hand passed through, vanishing as if cut off. Okay, just a quick peek and we’ll explore the rest of the room. I stepped through and the world shifted around me. I was standing back at the campsite. My body was insubstantial as a ghost and the tarp was a wisp of substance running straight through me. Non living things don’t seem to have much presence in this realm. Glancing down, I saw my sleeping body rolled up in the blankets, a thin silver thread running from it to me, and another thread running to Horse.
Looking around, I surveyed the campsite. My astral vision seemed to be on and had an unlimited range. I could see the life all around me, the distant forest was a sea of greenish-gold, grasses and brush nearby glowed with spectral light. Tiny ghost insects scurried while ghost mice nibbled at whatever ghost mice nibble on. Ghost seeds and ghost insects, I suppose. I turned my attention overhead and gaped at the sight of a monstrous serpentine spirit flying through the inky void. I dropped back through the tent and rolled inside my body. That was plenty enough for now.
I rolled through the mirror and landed flat on my back, staring at the fresco on the ceiling. Vinnie-God winked at me and Vinnie-Adam grinned. Climbing to my knees, I brushed non-existent dust from my trousers and watched mirror-me doubled over in soundless laughter.
“Hey, laughing-boy!” I yelled at him. “You’re like the guardian or something, right? You got it covered?”
Mirror-me stood and saluted with a smile, then gave me two thumbs up. A moment later, his face took on a serious expression and he wriggled his right hand in the ‘maybe’ motion. Then he pointed at me, tapped his wrist, and then a finger to his head.
It all depends on how fast I learn stuff, I guess.
Two thumbs up and a winning smile reflected back to me.
A large cork board was mounted to the wall over the computer and a small note was pinned to it. “Note to self: Don’t fuck with the Elvish womens.”
The computer screen featured a screensaver of me as Vitruvian Man doing callisthenics over the words ‘HumanOS’. I tapped the spacebar and was rewarded with the sound of powerful fans kicking to life as the computer emerged from sleep mode and prompted me for a password. Should I assume it’s the same as the password on the computer I pawned in my previous life?
Password: *******esi
I was rewarded with a sweet R&M desktop and a couple of icons. System, NeuralNet, My-Tunes, My-Movies, My-Office.
System was just what I expected, lots of .dna files and other confusing scariness that allowed me to tweak my physical body and mental state. My-Tunes was a collection of every song I’d ever heard and My-Movies was a collection of every movie I’d ever seen. Not that I’m complaining, but it would have been nice to have “My-Games” so I could play RDR. My-Office was a clone of the popular software by a similar name. I have no idea what I’ll ever need a spreadsheet for in this world.
NuralNet opened up a search engine called Me-Seeks, featuring a familiar blue guy.
I typed in “beer” and several thousand results were displayed, anything I’d ever read, heard, or watched about beer, including how to make it. This right here made the price of admission totally worth it, access to an exact copy of everything I’d ever read, and I was a voracious reader. Sadly, most of the stuff I read was futurology — solar panels, electronics, biotech advancements, quantum computing. The material for steam engines, blacksmithing, farming and the like, were slim pickings. That’s okay though, I could still reproduce the Gutenberg press, the cotton gin, simple internal combustion engines, and basic batteries along with some sketchy knowledge of metal alloys, acids, bases, and other things I had read over the years. All that wasted time watching “How Things Work” was finally going to pay off. I copied a few likely money makers to My-Office, saved the file, and exported to my Notes, just in case they didn’t exist on Aerth.
A popup covered the screen.
📱 [New Upgrade Available!] 📱
🎉 Enhance Your Experience with the Latest HumanOS Features! 🎉
🌟 Features Include:

• 🧠 Memory Booster: Increase your Memory for smoother multitasking and improved performance.
• 🔋 Energy Optimizer: Extend your battery life with advanced power-saving techniques.
• 🛠️ Utility Upgrades: Access new apps and utilities to enhance your daily life and adventures.
• 🗺️ Advanced Mapping: Never get lost again with enhanced GPS and location tracking.

🔥 Special Offer: Only 2000 credits for version 2.0 or 5000 credits for version 3.0! 🔥
[Upgrade Now ✅] [Remind Me Later ❌]
Apparently I could upgrade myself, which reduced the cost of using my Utilities while providing other minor benefits. My Utilities would level up as I used them, which would increase their battery cost, so if I didn’t keep pace with an update to the OS they could become prohibitively expensive to operate.
Stupid pay-to-win world.
So, do I pay 2000 credits for version 2.0 or 5000 credits for version 3.0?
I selected version 3.0 and klicked [Install]. After watching it download the update, it popped up another screen that asked if I wanted to update now, or wait until Midnight for the mandatory update.
I selected [No] just as the grandfather clock chimed 10:30 PM. I wondered if time ran slower in here, because it seemed like I had spent a lot more time on the computer than 15 minutes. Walking over to the imposing steel door, I noticed a bronze key with a thin chain in the lock. There was another sticky note on the door. “Subconscious. Please keep the key with you at all times.”
That’s not scary at all, is it?
I unlocked the door with a loud clunk and pulled it open to reveal a bedroom straight out of some royal castle. I could tell immediately that it had seen better days. The tapestries on the wall were frayed and fading. The canopy over the bed had a few holes in it. A thin layer of dust covered the mantle of a small fireplace set into the wall. There was a window letting in bright sunlight and I moved over to look outside.
I was on the third floor of a keep surrounded by the walls and turrets of a modest castle. A castle that had fallen into serious disrepair. Did this represent the state of my inner mind? One tower was shattered and the curtain wall under it damaged. The lower bailey was full of litter. I could see a few soldiers walking around the allure, keeping watch.
I have people in my subconscious?
Someone behind me cleared their throat.
Whirling, I discovered a familiar old man standing in the door of the bedroom. What was left of his hair formed a white halo around his head, his face was unshaven and covered with several days of growth. He was dressed like a poor and tattered manservant, but carried himself with a dignified air.
“Woodhouse?”
“It’s nice to see the master at home,” He said with a proper English accent. “There are many matters that require the master’s attention.”
“Uh, sure,” I said, hanging the key around my neck and tucking it in my shirt. “And who are you again?”
“Your personal manservant, of course” he said with a slight bow. Walking over to the steel door, he pulled it closed and it locked with a solid thunk. “Master should always keep his inner sanctum closed. One never knows if something nasty will creep in.”
“Thank you, uh, Woodhouse. I’ll remember that,” I said, rubbing the back of my neck. “So what needs tending and how do things work around here?”
He smiled and beckoned me with a white gloved hand. “If master would be so kind as to follow me, I’ll introduce him to the staff and explain the duties and obligations of his domain.”
I’m 99.9% certain that everyone here is just me wearing a mask, so I shrugged and followed Woodhouse out of the bedroom and into the rest of my subconscious.
Five minutes later I was on the ground floor and seated on a shabby throne with the cast of a popular —and probably very copyright protected— animation in front of me. Woodhouse was the head butler and my personal manservant. Pam was the cook and demanded that I start importing sugar and alcohol before she was shushed by Woodhouse. Carol was a maid. Krieger was chancellor and Cyril was the steward. Archer and Lana were in charge of security. Ray was the marshal in charge of everything from the stables to the blacksmith.
I stared in disbelief at the motley crew kneeling in front of me. No wonder my inner mind was in such shambles. I was overcome with an irrational sense of anger at myself.
“Arright, listen up,” I barked, my voice echoing around the room. “I swear to God that I will fire every single one of you and hire circus clowns to replace you if you keep fucking things up. No joke. Circus clowns, got it?”
I ran a hand over my face as Ray pissed himself. “The only reason I’m not putting a boot in your asses right now is because I realise that you’re aspects of me, and the people you represent are pretty damn good at their jobs when they give enough of a shit to actually do them. As a team, you’re dysfunctionally fantastic and always seem to come out ahead no matter the odds.”
Heaving a sigh, I continued. “Things have changed and I need to get my shit together. I’m going to need every one of you to pull your weight and help me help you. Get back to your duties, I’ll meet you one on one later.”
My subconscious caretakers scurried out of the room.
“I’ll have one of the maids tend to the piss,” Woodhouse assured me.
“Never mind that,” I snapped. “I honestly had no idea my mind was such a shit show. I’m very disappointed in myself.” I pictured the Angry, Sad, and Disgusted counters on my personal movies clicking up. “Show me what needs to be done and let’s get started.”
During Woodhouse’s walking tour, everything clicked into place. This was some altered version of Bodiam castle, a location that was on my bucket list of places to visit. The royal council room, located behind the throne room, contained a “living” tapestry on the wall that showed the castle and surrounding land in real time. The castle was located in the middle of a small lake, and a single wood bridge led to the mainland. A small town surrounded the lake and a wall encircled the town. Outside the wall, the land was an irregular patchwork of forest and field, with a stinking swamp to the south. The entire “kingdom” was maybe ten miles across, surrounded by impassable mountains with innumerable creeks that fed the lake which drained into the southern swamp.
“Zombies are the problem, sir.” Woodhouse said, as I surveyed the living tapestry of my mental domain.
“Zombies?” I prompted.
“Yes sir, Zombies” Woodhouse continued. “Nasty bitey things that come in from the mountains and harass the peasants. They’ve gotten especially worse over the last few months. The soldiers do what they can, but they seem to have lost all motivation. Probably because they haven’t been paid.”
“And who pays them?”
“Typically chancellor Krieger is in charge of financial matters, although Steward Figgis has taken over the duty, sir.”
“Then let’s make Figgis our first stop.”
“Very good, sir.”
The office of the steward was run by Cyril Figgis, who managed the kingdom in my absence. It was overflowing with paperwork and charts, books and scrolls piled high on every flat surface. Cyril was desperately attempting to tidy things when Woodhouse and I walked in.
“Yo..you..your majesty,” Cyril stuttered, bowing low. Scrolls fell from his overloaded arms, spilling across the floor. He dropped to his knees and scrambled to gather them up. “I didn’t expect you to visit so soon. Please forgive the mess, housekeeping has been slacking…”
This was the guy who ran things while I was conscious.
“Shut up, Cyril” I said. “You’re responsible for everything in this office. That includes keeping it organised and tidy.”
“Y..yes milord.”
“It’s my understanding that you’re in charge of making sure everyone gets paid. So why aren’t we paying people?” I asked.
“We’re nearly out of Fuks, your majesty. I’ve been saving them for emergencies.”
“Fucks?”
“Fuks,” Cyril explained, pushing a pile of books off a large chest and opening it. Reaching inside he pulled out two small bags and emptied them on top of his cluttered desk. “Gold and Silver Fuks, the currency of the kingdom. I can’t maintain the kingdom when I have no Fuks to give.”
Behold the subconscious kingdom of Vincent J. Carter, it runs on Fuks.
“So how do I get more fuks?” I asked, examining one of the coins. It had an image of me on one side and symbol on the other that could be interpreted as “peace among worlds”.
“You kill the zombies, your majesty.”
Of course I do.
Woodhouse and I left Cyril’s office and headed towards the office of the chancellor where Krieger worked. It seemed that Cyril took over financial matters when Krieger became erratic and proposed luring all the zombies into the city and setting it on fire. Not sure how that corresponds to my own self-destructive behaviour, but I’ve had some dark thoughts over the last couple of months and I’m sure they’re reflected here.
Krieger’s office was much neater in comparison to Cyril’s, but it wasn’t by much. Shelves lined the walls and were filled with an array of questionable items, including a still snapping zombie head in a jar. While the office of the chancellor was supposed to be in charge of financial matters, it looked more like a dodgy rummage sale.
Krieger was launching sword blades at a pig carcass when we walked in.
“What exactly are you doing?” I asked, standing in the doorway.
“Hm? Oh, your majesty!” he said, turning around and bowing deeply. “I’m testing a new invention. It’s a spring loaded hilt that shoots sword blades. Very useful for our soldiers.”
“Stupidest idea ever,” I snapped. “I hate everything about it.”
“Okay,” Krieger said, tossing the hilt into a nearby pile of junk. “But don’t blame me when you need to shoot a sword at a zombie and don’t have one.”
“So why aren’t you managing the financial affairs? Collecting taxes, paying people, stuff like that?”
“Because the population has declined so much none of that matters?”
“What do you mean?”
“Wellll, the population represents things you care about,” Krieger said, going into lecture mode. “And the zombies and other monsters are real or imagined problems in your way. Since you don’t care about too many things the population has shrunk to just what’s needed to keep everything running on the bare minimum of fuks. And since you don’t seem to have any long or short term goals, there’s no need to kill off the zombies and get more fuks. Everything is fine just the way it is.”
“No, it’s not Krieger” I said, grinding my teeth. “My mind is in a shambles. It’s a joke. I want it fixed. No, I want it better than fixed. I want it improved.”
“Oh! I’ve got just the thing for that!” He said, digging around in his pockets, “It’s a spring-loaded hilt that shoots swords!”
Pam and Cheryl were hanging out a gallery window jeering at Archer and Lana sparring in the inner courtyard.
“What the hell are you doing!” I snapped
They whirled in surprise and then dropped into deep curtseys.
“Your majesty!”
I took a deep breath, trying to regain my centre. “Get to work cleaning this place up. Find a room, clean it, and move on to the next. Start with my bedroom, then the throne room and the council chamber, then everything else.”
Cheryl spoke up. “Can’t do it. We got no fuks to clean with.”
“You need fuks to clean?”
“Gotta buy stuff,” Pam said. “Cleaning supplies, food. You wanna eat, you’re gonna have to spend some fuks.”
“Talk to Cyril,” I ordered. “Tell him I said to get you supplied.”
They ran off in the direction of the stewards office.
I watched Archer and Lana bashing each other enthusiastically through the window.
Several minutes later the sparring couple stopped and bowed when Woodhouse and I stepped into the inner courtyard.
“Your majesty”
“My liege”
“Enough,” I said. “If you have enough energy to smash each other, you have enough energy to smash zombies. Tell me what I need to know so I can start gathering fuks.”
Archer shrugged and spoke first. “You just kill the zombies and other monsters. They drop fuks.”
“Anything special about the zombies?” I asked. “Are they fast? Do people get turned into zombies when bitten?”
“Nope,” Lana said, resting her wooden sword on her shoulder. “Most of them are slow shamblers and just need a good wack to the head to kill them.”
“Some are special,” Archer interjected. “Occasionally you’ll have some fast ones, or those that need holy water to kill. They’re just bad memories, figments of your personality that need to be eliminated. Some are worse than others.”
“The zombies are bad memories?” I asked, imagining all the bad memories that I had.
“Memories, thoughts, insecurities, metaphysical mumbo-jumbo,” Woodhouse supplied. “They are endless, but constant vigilance can keep them under control.”
“So let’s get started,” I said. “Lead the way.”
Lana and Archer lead me up to the parapet over the front gate where I looked over at the dozens of zombies milling about aimlessly in front of the entrance to my mind. Pulling out my gun, I began to pick them off, easy as shooting fish in a barrel. The crack of my spell pistol attracted more zombies and I dispatched them with ease until no more were left around the gate. As I fired each shot I could feel some sort of existential energy flowing from me, draining some hidden reserve.
“Gather up the Fuks,” I commanded. “And Lana?”
“Mi’lord?”
“There’s no excuse for this. From now on, I expect the walls to be clear of all zombies.”
“Yes mi’lord,” she said, giving me a small bow.
Turning to Archer, I shook my head. “You’re obviously my personal narcissism, so just try to stay out of Lana’s way, or better yet - try to kill more zombies than her. If you think you can.”
Archer scoffed. “No contest. I took top marks in sharpshooting.”
“That means I should expect to see results by tomorrow. I look forward to it.”
Archer looked panicked for a moment then smiled. “Sure, I can give you results.”
Turning back to Woodhouse I said “Show me what else need attending.”
Woodhouse led me through the town that represented my mind, pointing out each business that had fallen into disrepair, suggested others that needed improvements, and additions that would benefit me. In the distance, I could hear Lana and Archer shooting at the crowd of zombies and with each echoing shot I felt a tiny bit better about everything.
[INDEX]

First off 15-22$ is the price. Probably willing to pay a little more if there's reason to.
Anyway I want a simple diagram of my magic system for my writing project.
Imagine a simple flow chart that sorta looks like a tree.
It's not gonna require anything complex like color or shading.
I'll give the money upfront on cash app.