It’s that time again, where CompTIA releases a new version of their exams. This time, it’s their ever popular Network+
The old N10-008 exam is set to retire on December 20^th, 2024, and the new N10-009 exam is set to release on June 20^th, 2024
Along with the expiration dates, everyone’s favorite question to ask is: which version should I take?
Well, good news everyone! I have created an Excel spreadsheet that you can download (for free!) with all the objectives from the 008 and the 009 cross-referenced, meaning you can visually see which objectives overlap, which objectives got dropped from the 008, and which objectives got added to the 009
And for those of you who don’t feel like reading through hundreds of lines on an Excel spreadsheet, here’s a more concise meta-analysis contrasting the old 008 with the new 009:

• The 009 dropped a LOT of objectives from the 008. Here are the objectives that took a major hit:
  • troubleshooting in general across every previous objective has been downsized by a good 50-60%: Wi-Fi, connectors, etc.
    • good - because some scenarios were uncommon or overly specific (i.e. duplexing issues)
    • bad - because some scenarios are extremely common (i.e. incorrect DNS)
  • hardware (both networking devices and network tools) were downsized substantially
  • General Security, Physical Security, and Documentation types were cut back
    • mixed feelings - I think this might be an attempt from CompTIA to prevent too much overlap between their various certifications. But without doing another comprehensive comparison (problem for another day) it's hard for me to say for sure
• There is a ~69% overlap from the new 009 to the new 008
  • There are ~387 total objectives on the 009 exam. ~268 of them either completely or generally overlap with the old 008. Considering how old much of modern networking is (TCP/IP dates back to the 70s and still runs the internet to this day), this is unsurprising
• What new stuff did the 009 add?
  • Most new stuff to the Network+ isn't really new to the world of networking. It's more of a change of emphasis
    • Objectives that were altered: DNS, SD-WAN, an overhaul in Security Concepts, and an overhaul in WiFi. The biggest surprise of all however was a much more intense emphasis on Spanning Tree Protocol, which should make for some interesting exam questions
    • Completely new objectives: Section 1.8 on the 009 test objectives) is the only place that has completely new objectives to the Network+ - not just a change in emphasis - covering objectives like VXLAN and Zero-Trust

That’s it for my metanalysis. Hope some of you find it useful; good luck out there!

So what is the deal with Campus security?
On multiple occasions during the summer and on weekends, I've been working in buildings other than the library after 10:00pm and security has just checked my school ID and told me to just make sure that the door is closed behind me when I leave.
This evening however I'm sitting in the common area of the Bisset/EB building and this female security guard kicked me out. She wouldn't even allow me several minutes to finish what I was doing and as a result I've failed my quiz. It timed out and I had not had a chance to look at half of it.
https://www.mtroyal.ca/CampusServices/CampusResources/studentspaces/index.htm
I see here that it says "Students must have their campus card on them if staying past 10pm, but must be in the main building (ie: EA, EB, EC are off limits)."
So tonight she had grounds. However this same guard has told me to move from the main Building before. Does she have grounds to enforce this? When school policy doesn't stipulate that we are only supposed to be in the Riddell Library.
I mean last July is when I stopped working in the library because someone who I can only assume was not a student and was on drugs was in there after 10:00pm.
I called security and nobody came to address the issue. So based on the fact that they are too lazy to remove trespassers, I don't feel safe in the library after hours.

i started talking to a guy I met on an app a few months ago, we got close very fast. he lives in Canada and I live in the US so we haven't been able to meet just yet, although we plan on meeting as soon as possible. we've had a little bit of a rocky road so far. to start, we are both trans males and recently he started hanging out with a guy, which he says is nothing more than a friend. he also said he's very transphobic so he didn't have any feelings towards him, but they have been drinking together, smoking 🍃 together, and hanging out until after 3 am. I found this extremely weird, and we talked about it and he reassured me everything was okay but it doesn't seem okay. two weeks ago, he slowly stopped talking to me. only sending a few texts a day, or maybe a snap or two although, nothing more. he said he was busy with exams and such which was understandable. he called me passive aggressive when I said "sure" when he asked to call, which is how our whole "communication" conversation started. he said that I also seemed "uninterested".
this is how this conversation went:
me: i just kinda assumed shit wasn't gonna work out bc everything was off so I stopped putting in effort, not just to you, to everyone. i didn't know I was being passive aggressive I was just trying to make shit work where I felt like shit wasn't working and it didn't seem to help a lot. I know you have stuff going on and it isn't your fault you've been busy but I just miss how we used to talk. maybe it's just me, but I felt like you pushed me away a little bit and it sorta has worn on me because I truthfully did like you so much and just wanted a little bit of time out of your day, but then I found out everything n I thought I was doing better at not being so off. I'm sorry about everything I'm sorry if that seemed like I was putting all of that off on you, it wasn't your fault, it was mine and I can recognize that and accept it. I'm just trying to communicate how I'm feeling
him: I’m sorry if I made you feel like I was pushing you away, I genuinely wasn’t. I just barely had time to talk to anyone anymore because of how much pressure school was putting on me. I haven’t even been working on commissions lately. I’ve been burnt out as fuck and have barely even had the motivation to do practically anything online and irl, so I’ve been struggling a lot with that. But I was honestly trying to make an effort to continue my conversations with you even with my lack of motivation. I care about you so much, I really do, which is why I was trying my best to keep up. When I noticed how little we were talking was when I decided I should try and let you know why I wasn’t talking as much, because I didn’t want you to feel like it was your fault. I wanted you to know that I was just busy but was still trying to make time for you as much as I possibly could. At the end of the day you were honestly one of the only people I was actually talking to, especially consistently. That’s why I was so excited that I had gotten all my school work done last night, because I knew I’d finally be able to talk consistently like we used to. But when you were really dry and disinterested I kinda just didn’t bother. I was put off by it and figured you maybe needed space or something. So I tried giving you that today and for the rest of the night last night. I was complaining to one of my friends about it because I missed talking to you so much but you just no longer seemed interested at all. So tonight I occupied myself by building shit in minecraft and I figured maybe we could call and I could show you around my world, kind of as a way to try and make things like they were before. I didn’t mean to miss your calls, but I rarely have my notifications on for anything, so I genuinely just didn’t get your calls. I’m so sorry I made you feel that way though, I never intended anything like that. I care about you a lot and I just want things to go back to how they were
me: I've just been so put off lately. I've been complaining about it to Ray for awhile now. i just seriously couldn't come to terms with things, in my eyes, "falling apart" which is most likely my mental illness speaking. i really didn't mean to seem like I was putting you off but when I realized that you were kinda distant, I decided that the best thing to do in the situation was to push you away and detach myself from you, which again is most likely my mental illnesses speaking. I've also just been stressing about how you turned off your location and I was kinda left in the dust when you hung out with Kory or whoever, which I will admit slightly made me jealous bc of how your family reacted to meeting him or what not. on top of all of that, I've tried to not make you feel like you were taking the parental role because I didn't want to ruin everything we've worked towards. i genuinely do care about you probably more than I should and I want nothing more than to have you around. i mean that with my whole being. you have made things so much better. I'm glad we were able to talk about this. it makes me feel a little better.
him: I’m sorry, I turned off my location because my brother was constantly watching me after I almost got abducted that other night, and it just made me irritated. If you ever want to check up on me you’re welcome to use Life360, idm. And I genuinely don’t care for Kory that way. He’s sweet, sure, but he’s lowkey transphobic and has no idea I’m trans. I kinda just hangout with him cause he gives me weed and lets me use his PS5. I’m sorry I made you jealous, I just shared those things with you cause I didn’t think it would bother you since you always brought up that Tommy chick. Again, I’m really sorry I made you feel like I was being distant. I swear I’ll try and communicate to you whenever I become busy again, that way you won’t think it’s anything to do with you. Exams, prom and grad are coming up soon, but that should be about the last time I get that busy for a while. I’ll tell you when that happens though, I promise. But I genuinely was just so fucking drained, I could barely even make up the motivation to do mondain tasks for the last few weeks, so I swear it had nothing to do with you. I’m feeling much better now though and I really do want to start spending more time talking to you again. I genuinely get so excited whenever I get messages from you, and I want that again. You’re the person I talk to the most and you mean a lot to me, so I really don’t want to lose that or ever make you feel like that’s not the case. Again, I’m so sorry I made you feel that way. I would never intentionally do that to you
with all that being said, my sister said he has started to love bomb me, as he started saying he loved me (ily) and all that type of stuff, but she also said he seemed narcissistic. I tried to talk to him today, and he said everything seemed fine to him, and he was confused on what I thought was "off". i explained that I want us both to be on the same page, and I didn't want to get the wrong idea, and he is hanging out with that guy right now and has left me on opened for the last twenty minutes. i don't know what to think and I really need advice.

Recently I unlocked and got my first Marauder and have become fond of running Lvl 4 missions with Home Guard and Caldari Navy
Im wanting to slowly upgrade my Golem to have Caldari faction mods but some of these tag requirements seem high, not necissarily on the modules im looking at getting - but other things in the store.
For example, the Cal Navy 200mm Railgun BPC needs 190 Fed Navy Fleet captain I and 318 Fed Navy Fleet Major I's , after a handful of storyline missions I have 11 Fed Navy Fleet Captain 1s and 29 fleet majors - So it seems like an overly abundant amount from what Ive seen
So basically my question is - Is there another way to farm these tags that would be quicker than waiting for a storyline and hoping its a fed navy combat mission? I know of the oddball gallente security missions but I barely see those.
Pic to show the golem I got - current stats are: 2630 dps , 729 hp/s active - NOT cap stable, but in missions i barely have to use it as it is. I know I need a prop mod but i dont want to lose any of the current mid slots. Any input on different fits is welcome as well I can use both T2 cruise and torp I personally prefer torp
https://preview.redd.it/uvee0j2g734d1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=b771f71fb26d7eb71cd48d3cd0435577bb89704a

i started talking to a guy I met on an app a few months ago, we got close very fast. he lives in Canada and I live in the US so we haven't been able to meet just yet, although we plan on meeting as soon as possible. we've had a little bit of a rocky road so far. to start, we are both trans males and recently he started hanging out with a guy, which he says is nothing more than a friend. he also said he's very transphobic so he didn't have any feelings towards him, but they have been drinking together, smoking 🍃 together, and hanging out until after 3 am. I found this extremely weird, and we talked about it and he reassured me everything was okay but it doesn't seem okay. two weeks ago, he slowly stopped talking to me. only sending a few texts a day, or maybe a snap or two although, nothing more. he said he was busy with exams and such which was understandable. he called me passive aggressive when I said "sure" when he asked to call, which is how our whole "communication" conversation started. he said that I also seemed "uninterested".
this is how this conversation went:
me: i just kinda assumed shit wasn't gonna work out bc everything was off so I stopped putting in effort, not just to you, to everyone. i didn't know I was being passive aggressive I was just trying to make shit work where I felt like shit wasn't working and it didn't seem to help a lot. I know you have stuff going on and it isn't your fault you've been busy but I just miss how we used to talk. maybe it's just me, but I felt like you pushed me away a little bit and it sorta has worn on me because I truthfully did like you so much and just wanted a little bit of time out of your day, but then I found out everything n I thought I was doing better at not being so off. I'm sorry about everything I'm sorry if that seemed like I was putting all of that off on you, it wasn't your fault, it was mine and I can recognize that and accept it. I'm just trying to communicate how I'm feeling
him: I’m sorry if I made you feel like I was pushing you away, I genuinely wasn’t. I just barely had time to talk to anyone anymore because of how much pressure school was putting on me. I haven’t even been working on commissions lately. I’ve been burnt out as fuck and have barely even had the motivation to do practically anything online and irl, so I’ve been struggling a lot with that. But I was honestly trying to make an effort to continue my conversations with you even with my lack of motivation. I care about you so much, I really do, which is why I was trying my best to keep up. When I noticed how little we were talking was when I decided I should try and let you know why I wasn’t talking as much, because I didn’t want you to feel like it was your fault. I wanted you to know that I was just busy but was still trying to make time for you as much as I possibly could. At the end of the day you were honestly one of the only people I was actually talking to, especially consistently. That’s why I was so excited that I had gotten all my school work done last night, because I knew I’d finally be able to talk consistently like we used to. But when you were really dry and disinterested I kinda just didn’t bother. I was put off by it and figured you maybe needed space or something. So I tried giving you that today and for the rest of the night last night. I was complaining to one of my friends about it because I missed talking to you so much but you just no longer seemed interested at all. So tonight I occupied myself by building shit in minecraft and I figured maybe we could call and I could show you around my world, kind of as a way to try and make things like they were before. I didn’t mean to miss your calls, but I rarely have my notifications on for anything, so I genuinely just didn’t get your calls. I’m so sorry I made you feel that way though, I never intended anything like that. I care about you a lot and I just want things to go back to how they were
me: I've just been so put off lately. I've been complaining about it to Ray for awhile now. i just seriously couldn't come to terms with things, in my eyes, "falling apart" which is most likely my mental illness speaking. i really didn't mean to seem like I was putting you off but when I realized that you were kinda distant, I decided that the best thing to do in the situation was to push you away and detach myself from you, which again is most likely my mental illnesses speaking. I've also just been stressing about how you turned off your location and I was kinda left in the dust when you hung out with Kory or whoever, which I will admit slightly made me jealous bc of how your family reacted to meeting him or what not. on top of all of that, I've tried to not make you feel like you were taking the parental role because I didn't want to ruin everything we've worked towards. i genuinely do care about you probably more than I should and I want nothing more than to have you around. i mean that with my whole being. you have made things so much better. I'm glad we were able to talk about this. it makes me feel a little better.
him: I’m sorry, I turned off my location because my brother was constantly watching me after I almost got abducted that other night, and it just made me irritated. If you ever want to check up on me you’re welcome to use Life360, idm. And I genuinely don’t care for Kory that way. He’s sweet, sure, but he’s lowkey transphobic and has no idea I’m trans. I kinda just hangout with him cause he gives me weed and lets me use his PS5. I’m sorry I made you jealous, I just shared those things with you cause I didn’t think it would bother you since you always brought up that Tommy chick. Again, I’m really sorry I made you feel like I was being distant. I swear I’ll try and communicate to you whenever I become busy again, that way you won’t think it’s anything to do with you. Exams, prom and grad are coming up soon, but that should be about the last time I get that busy for a while. I’ll tell you when that happens though, I promise. But I genuinely was just so fucking drained, I could barely even make up the motivation to do mondain tasks for the last few weeks, so I swear it had nothing to do with you. I’m feeling much better now though and I really do want to start spending more time talking to you again. I genuinely get so excited whenever I get messages from you, and I want that again. You’re the person I talk to the most and you mean a lot to me, so I really don’t want to lose that or ever make you feel like that’s not the case. Again, I’m so sorry I made you feel that way. I would never intentionally do that to you
with all that being said, my sister said he has started to love bomb me, as he started saying he loved me (ily) and all that type of stuff, but she also said he seemed narcissistic. I tried to talk to him today, and he said everything seemed fine to him, and he was confused on what I thought was "off". i explained that I want us both to be on the same page, and I didn't want to get the wrong idea, and he is hanging out with that guy right now and has left me on opened for the last twenty minutes. i don't know what to think and I really need advice.

So I basically completed the practice exams in the Blue Book and solved all the prep books from princeton review and meltzer. My overall score is around 1400-1420 (math is always way higher than RW) and I'd like to get at least a 1510 on the August test, but I'm running out of test prep materials. I swear we're lack of them compared to previous SAT. I especially wanna improve my vocab skill especially in the RW section. Can you recommend some study materials I can use?

Hi Everyone, today I passed my Security + on my first try. I have no background in Infosec or IT other than jailbreaking iPhones back in the day and cell phone repairs on my own devices.
This is the start of my journey, my goal is learn more about Pen Testing and Digital Forensics. I have Googles Cybersecurity Profesional, ISC2 Certified in Cybersecurity (CC) as well.
If you are struggling to pass, I recommend using the Security + PocketPrep on the iOS store, as well as Darril Gibson Security + book, Professor Messor on YouTube, and the Exam objectives!

Okay, we went to a concert had mediocre seats, but still centered and we could see on the big screen. Last band plays (our favorite) and my boyfriend wants to try and get closer. He does a lap and finds a hole in the security and we get past the first few and make.our way toward the stage. We end up sliding into the VIP section and chill for a few minutes. A security guard notices us and asks for our wrist bands. Then my boyfriend starts explaining we never got one, we were supposed to get one and we didn't. The guard says we are supposed to have one on. I stop listening to them and try and watcht he concert. The guard is persistent and I stand up and tell the guard I'm going to figure out what happen (not fully admitting we were supposed to be there ) and I walk away from my boyfriend and the security guard. I simply walk back to our original seats.
My boyfriend eventually comes back and is upset with me- tells me something along the lines of "you don't trust me" "you don't believe in me" "he knows i was bull shitting him, he doesn't care" .
I got upset- (tell me if I'm over reacting) - but I got upset because I was uncomfortable and I left the situation and it felt harsh to be told "you don't believe in me" over something so silly. I got upset because I don't want to see a worker get hassled at their job- I don't want to be apart of someone's interaction if it involves lying and gaslighting the guy into believing we needed to be there. I was okay with doing something silly like sneaking into to VIP, but not when it comes down to a worker having to interact with us.
Did I bale on the situation too early?

• boyfriend if you see this, don't hate me. I just have to know what others think.
• I am telling this as best as I can remember, and as neutral as I possible can.
• please just be nice

Starting a blog in 2024 is an exciting venture and can be accomplished with a few key steps. Here's a comprehensive guide to get you started from scratch:

1. Choose Your Blog's Niche

• Identify Your Passion and Expertise: Write about something you love and know well.
• Research Market Demand: Use tools like Google Trends or Keyword Planner to find popular topics within your niche.
• Analyze Competition: Check out other blogs in your niche to understand the competition and find your unique angle.

2. Define Your Audience

• Create Reader Personas: Think about who your ideal readers are – their demographics, interests, and problems.
• Tailor Content to Your Audience: Plan your content around what your audience needs and wants.

3. Choose a Blogging Platform

• WordPress.org: Highly recommended for its flexibility and control. Requires a separate hosting service.
• Blogger: Good for beginners, but limited in customization.
• Medium: Great for reaching an audience quickly, but less control over design and monetization.
• Wix or Squarespace: Easy-to-use website builders with blogging capabilities.

4. Pick a Domain Name and Hosting Service

• Domain Name: Choose a name that is easy to remember, relevant to your niche, and preferably a .com.
• Hosting Service: Popular options include Bluehost, SiteGround, and HostGator. Ensure the service offers good uptime, customer support, and scalability.

5. Set Up Your Blog

• Install WordPress: If you choose WordPress, most hosting services offer a one-click installation.
• Select a Theme: Pick a clean, responsive theme. Free and premium options are available on sites like ThemeForest or the WordPress theme directory.
• Install Essential Plugins: Some must-have plugins include Yoast SEO, Akismet (for spam protection), and Jetpack (for site stats and security).

6. Design Your Blog

• Customize Your Theme: Adjust colors, fonts, and layout to match your brand.
• Create Key Pages: Essential pages include About, Contact, Privacy Policy, and any other pages specific to your niche (e.g., Portfolio, Services).
• Optimize for Mobile: Ensure your blog looks good and works well on mobile devices.

7. Create Quality Content

• Plan Your Content: Use an editorial calendar to schedule posts. Aim for a mix of evergreen and trending topics.
• Write Engaging Posts: Craft compelling headlines, use images and multimedia, and write in a conversational tone.
• SEO Best Practices: Use keywords naturally, optimize meta descriptions, use header tags, and include internal and external links.

8. Promote Your Blog

• Social Media: Share your posts on platforms like Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn.
• Email Marketing: Start building an email list from day one. Use tools like Mailchimp or ConvertKit.
• Guest Posting: Write guest posts for other blogs in your niche to reach a wider audience.
• Engage with Your Audience: Respond to comments, participate in online communities, and network with other bloggers.

9. Monetize Your Blog

• Affiliate Marketing: Promote products related to your niche and earn a commission for every sale made through your referral links.
• Advertising: Use Google AdSense or work directly with brands for sponsored content.
• Sell Products/Services: Offer your own products or services, such as eBooks, courses, or consulting.
• Membership/Subscription: Provide premium content for subscribers or members.

10. Analyze and Improve

• Use Analytics Tools: Google Analytics and other tools can help you track your blog’s performance.
• Monitor Key Metrics: Focus on traffic, bounce rate, session duration, and conversion rates.
• Continuous Improvement: Regularly update old posts, optimize for SEO, and adjust your strategy based on performance data.

Conclusion

Starting a blog in 2024 involves careful planning, consistent effort, and a willingness to adapt and learn. By following these steps, you'll be well on your way to creating a successful blog that resonates with your audience and achieves your goals. Happy blogging!
4oStarting a blog in 2024 is an exciting venture and can be accomplished with a few key steps. Here's a comprehensive guide to get you started from scratch:

1. Choose Your Blog's Niche

• Identify Your Passion and Expertise: Write about something you love and know well.
• Research Market Demand: Use tools like Google Trends or Keyword Planner to find popular topics within your niche.
• Analyze Competition: Check out other blogs in your niche to understand the competition and find your unique angle.

2. Define Your Audience

• Create Reader Personas: Think about who your ideal readers are – their demographics, interests, and problems.
• Tailor Content to Your Audience: Plan your content around what your audience needs and wants.

3. Choose a Blogging Platform

• WordPress.org: Highly recommended for its flexibility and control. Requires a separate hosting service.
• Blogger: Good for beginners, but limited in customization.
• Medium: Great for reaching an audience quickly, but less control over design and monetization.
• Wix or Squarespace: Easy-to-use website builders with blogging capabilities.

4. Pick a Domain Name and Hosting Service

• Domain Name: Choose a name that is easy to remember, relevant to your niche, and preferably a .com.
• Hosting Service: Popular options include Bluehost, SiteGround, and HostGator. Ensure the service offers good uptime, customer support, and scalability.

5. Set Up Your Blog

• Install WordPress: If you choose WordPress, most hosting services offer a one-click installation.
• Select a Theme: Pick a clean, responsive theme. Free and premium options are available on sites like ThemeForest or the WordPress theme directory.
• Install Essential Plugins: Some must-have plugins include Yoast SEO, Akismet (for spam protection), and Jetpack (for site stats and security).

6. Design Your Blog

• Customize Your Theme: Adjust colors, fonts, and layout to match your brand.
• Create Key Pages: Essential pages include About, Contact, Privacy Policy, and any other pages specific to your niche (e.g., Portfolio, Services).
• Optimize for Mobile: Ensure your blog looks good and works well on mobile devices.

7. Create Quality Content

• Plan Your Content: Use an editorial calendar to schedule posts. Aim for a mix of evergreen and trending topics.
• Write Engaging Posts: Craft compelling headlines, use images and multimedia, and write in a conversational tone.
• SEO Best Practices: Use keywords naturally, optimize meta descriptions, use header tags, and include internal and external links.

8. Promote Your Blog

• Social Media: Share your posts on platforms like Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn.
• Email Marketing: Start building an email list from day one. Use tools like Mailchimp or ConvertKit.
• Guest Posting: Write guest posts for other blogs in your niche to reach a wider audience.
• Engage with Your Audience: Respond to comments, participate in online communities, and network with other bloggers.

9. Monetize Your Blog

• Affiliate Marketing: Promote products related to your niche and earn a commission for every sale made through your referral links.
• Advertising: Use Google AdSense or work directly with brands for sponsored content.
• Sell Products/Services: Offer your own products or services, such as eBooks, courses, or consulting.
• Membership/Subscription: Provide premium content for subscribers or members.

10. Analyze and Improve

• Use Analytics Tools: Google Analytics and other tools can help you track your blog’s performance.
• Monitor Key Metrics: Focus on traffic, bounce rate, session duration, and conversion rates.
• Continuous Improvement: Regularly update old posts, optimize for SEO, and adjust your strategy based on performance data.

Conclusion

Starting a blog in 2024 involves careful planning, consistent effort, and a willingness to adapt and learn. By following these steps, you'll be well on your way to creating a successful blog that resonates with your audience and achieves your goals. Happy blogging!

I have been looking forward to my son’s Pre-K graduation for months. Although I am extremely proud of- and happy for him, a few things are weighing on my mind following the graduation. Maybe I’m overreacting – and I truly hope I am. If I am, please tell me.
The first thing that bothered me about my son’s Pre-K graduation is the total lack of security to enter. It’s a very small VPK, so I didn’t expect security guards, but there wasn’t so much as a sign in sheet for the parents / visitors. There were no ID checks; anyone could simply walk in. *
Second, when my son was called up to receive his diploma, the teacher called him by his first name only and followed up with, “I’m not even going to attempt to pronounce your last name”. We do have a longer Italian surname, but it’s not hard to learn, not hard to say, and the teachers has more letters in her last name than we do. In my 40 years, the only time people weren’t sure how to pronounce it was the first time I met them. Other than that, or simply not knowing me personally, you’re a telemarketer if you can’t pronounce it. You don’t need to know a different language ffs. We’re born and raised in the US for the last century. I expect the teacher who’s with my son 5 days a week or an entire school year to know how to say his last name. If my son’s peers can pronounce it, there’s no excuse. (And yes, this WAS his full-time teacher, not an assistant or different teacher, etc.) Here's the kicker. It's a class of like 16. It's not a school like Hogwarts full of kids with no vowels in their last names. *
Lastly, I was so happy when my son received two awards because only a couple kids received two. What could go wrong, right? His last name is spelled wrong on both of his laminated awards. Really? Come on, man! *
Oh, one more thing that I should have started with. Upon arriving at the scheduled time of the graduation, I found out that they were behind schedule by a full hour, and everyone had to wait outside. There was just a note on the door and the door was locked.
Really? We can do better than this. #DoBetter
I know these "problems" may seem miniscule compared to other "real" problems in the world. I know I have the choice to focus on the positive things that happened today and not let the "small" things live rent free in my mind. But should I turn the other cheek? Am I wrong to assume the brightest crayon in the box shouldn't be in my son's backpack - it should be teaching the class? Sorry, for the jokes. I'm trying to make light of the situation to cheer myself up. That was kind of funny, I guess. At the end of the day, all of this is just very discouraging when I think about who will be teaching my son.
Before I go, I want to give praise to ALL of the good teachers out there who care about the kids and their education and take the time to know their students, no matter if you're a Pre-K teacher or a Scholar, I commend you and appreciate you. I understand that it is not an easy job and I know you should be paid a hell of a lot more. I am in no way intending to bash all teachers or even most teachers. I TRULY hope this is an isolated issue in this smaller sized town in the SE.
I had many great, and memorable teachers in my life I will always remember, and I truly pray someone just like one of them finds their way into my son's classroom when he begins kindergarten this Fall.
ALL YOUNG CHILDREN DESERVE A TEACHER WHO AT LEAST CARES.
Thanks for listening.

As a person who recently passed their PPL, I want to give potential pilots advice so that they could avoid the same mistakes I made during training and during the checkride. I hope you guys find this helpful:

1. Personally, I HIGHLY suggest part 141. I went from a part 141 to 61 because I had a terrible experience with a preivous flight school, which is another story for another day. A 141 program will give you structure and study skills whereas 61 you get to design your own curriculum in a way. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with making your own curriculum. Some people learn differently than others. But the problem is that you're entering into a skilled field that you have presumably never been a part of before, so you're gonna have to learn to walk before you run in both the air and on the ground. Now, I understand that people on this forum might have a different opinion than me on this topic, but as a new learner, I think the more structure the better goes a long way. Especially when it comes down to saving money and preventing gaps in your knowledge, in addition to having to spend hundreds of dollars of extra money like I did.
2. Buy a good ground school IMMEDIATELY. Trust, me, this is going to bite you if you wait off for too long like I did. Buy a ground school (and a good one) so you have checkride knowledge and will be able to get at least an 85% on the PPL written. DPEs care about those scores, so make sure you're prepared.
3. FFS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE use checklists on the checkride and read the ACS before your checkride dates. Write down what you're good and bad at and work around it with your instructor. I literally cannot even begin to describe how many people bust their checkrides over bad reasons like this.
4. After you learn how to do normal landings, practice short and soft field often. This is another common reason why people fail. They simply do not have their landings up to standard or maybe they just had a bad day on their checkride.
5. DO RESEARCH BEFORE SELECTING A DPE. Here's the thing: There are many great DPEs out there who want you to succeed. Of course, they are not going to pass you if you are not prepared, but there are DPEs out there that are genuinely terrible people who are only fat it for the money and will have no guilt in failing you for stupid reasons. Ask what kind of experiences other pilots had with their DPEs and see if they would recommend him or not.
6. Study. I don't have much to say about this. If you do not study and have a system in place that will keep you're knowledge on track as time passes, you WILL struggle BIG TIME and ultimately spend more money. Just read over the books for 45 minutes a day. AND START TO STUDY THE ORAL EXAM GUIDE COVER TO COVER EARLY IN YOUR TRAINING. If you do this you'll have that whole thing drilled in your head before you know it no matter how dreadfully long it is.
7. Do your research on the school you go to. Also, be VERY careful of programs like ATP who promise you a bunch of benefits but don't deliver. They will take your money, leave you in debt and not give a single damn. Choose your school wisely, read reviews, talk to instructors, and make sure that you will not be treated badly. I learned this the hard way before switching flight schools. Also look up ATP stories on Reddit and other internet sites and you will see the bad reviews and false promises that I am talking about.
8. If you're not doing well with your instructor (maybe he/she is not a good teacher). By all means, switch. A lot of people avoid switching because they're afraid that it may make the instructor feel bad. Trust me, it is ok. If you have a problem, maybe you're struggling on a topic, or you aren't absorbing info from your instructor, talk to your CFI to try to get it resolved. If not, switch.

A good CFI will know that some people click better with others in the long run. ALSO, occasionally take flights with other instructors. If you are struggling on a specific area with your current instructor, I guarantee you a few flights/grounds with another really good instructor will help you understand the material more easily. This is even if you simply couldn't get the knowledge through your head with your original CFI. If I had done this on topics I struggled on, I wouldn't have spent the time and money that I spent.
I hope you guys got something from this. Some of these are expensive lessons that I am giving to you guys for free. Hope this helps.
EDIT: Additional points added

Hello everyone, I'm 32 and seeking guidance as transition into the IT field. I have 5 years of experience in Excel data analysis, some automation experience with AutoHotkey, and a strong desire to learn. I recently left an unfulfilling job to pursue a more rewarding career. While I don't have a formal computer science degree, my practical experience and dedication are my driving forces.
Thankfully, my family is incredibly supportive and has offered to cover our living expenses for a year while I focus on learning and finding a new job. However, this transition hasn't been without its challenges:
Distractions: It's proving difficult to find a quiet and focused environment to study at home due to constant interruptions from my child and family members. I've explored the idea of studying at libraries or cafes, but the cost can add up quickly. I'm also open to the possibility of an unpaid internship to gain practical experience, but I recognize the need to strengthen my Python skills beforehand.
Intense Heat: The scorching temperatures in Tamil Nadu (33-35°C) are making it nearly impossible to concentrate on my studies. While an air conditioner would provide relief, I'm hesitant to dip into my equity investments (1.60 lac) to purchase one. I'm unsure whether to ask my wife to buy an AC on EMI or explore alternative cooling solutions.
Job Market Anxiety: The current layoffs and the growing presence of AI in the IT industry have me feeling uncertain about job security. As someone in their early 30s entering this field, I'm seeking advice on how to navigate this competitive landscape and remain relevant in the face of rapid technological advancements.
I'm incredibly grateful for any insights, suggestions, or experiences you're willing to share. Your guidance would be invaluable.
Thank you!

Hey! Ik a lot of the incoming first year engineering students have accepted their offers recently (congrats!) and I thought this may be of use for you guys and some of these can go for any first year student honestly. I learned so so much during my first year and would love to share if it even benefits one person!
- every percent helps! A lot of your mark will be based off the midterm and final, but most classes have room to gain marks in quizzes and homework. Although each one may be worth small (for ex. in pcs each hw is work 0.5%), don't get in the habit of slacking off and overlooking those. Those percents add up and can help you pass your course esp if you do poorly on major assessments. it can be very easy to skip or forget them in the midst of midterm season, but you future self will thank you when your calculating your grade at the end of the semester. Plus its a great way to stay sharp and caught up!
- join clubs. everyone says this but its for a reason!!!! It is an excellent way to meet upper years and learn from them, as well as gain skills and opportunities that set you apart from peers. You can also add it to your LinkedIn and climb up the exec ladder if you stick to the same clubs over the years. This is the best thing I could've done my first year. Although it can be challenging managing them along your classes, even joining one or two positions can help make yourself well rounded. Some examples are MUES positions, FYEO fyc, IEEE, WiE, BMES, MECU, ECEstorms, CECU and literally SM more.
- design teams. on the topic of clubs, design teams esp are something I wish I joined but hope to in my second year. Design teams are amazing because they allow you to contribute to physical projects and use the concepts you are taught in your classes! They're also great because you can add these projects to your resume and linkendin.
- find good friends/study group. It can be overwhelming and scary in the beginning to make friends, and it does take time to build those relationships. However I highly recommend you put yourself out there and out your comfort zone even if it is just talking to someone while waiting outside of a lecture. I cannot stress enough how beneficial a supportive friend/group can be for your entire degree! You guys can hang out between classes, lock in and study together, they can be there to help you/teach the things you don't understand, hold you accountable when you slack off, hype you up and push you to seek new oppurtunites, and make sm memories. don't be scared about meeting new people, it is a lot easier than you think esp bc everyone is on the same boat in first year and looking for friends! Joining clubs as I mentioned is a great way, as well as talking to the people in your tutorials/labs and inviting them to get a bite or drink with you!
- hold your self accountable. You know yourself best and you know when you are slacking off, when you are doing something you shouldn't be, when you can be doing better than you are, etc. University is not like hs where you have a teacher or figure to hold you accountable, you need to do that for yourself. Eng is not easy, you need to know when it's time to study or put in effort because spoiler alert, you need both to succeed. you cannot expect to pass or have good grades if you are only going to lectures and not reviewing, doing your hw, or studying. and holding yourself accountable throughout the sem can make studying for finals and midterms easier for you.
- be careful using chatgpt, bc you will become dependent on it. Ai is definitely a helpful tool than can be used to answer specific questions and spark new ideas, however use it cautiously. Pushing and using your brain is so good for you, however access to gpt and ai can make it seem like an easy fix. It is, but all I am saying is don't use it for everything, don't use it when you have the answers in your notes or textbook, don't use it if you have time to work it out/think on it. you do not want to become one of those brain rot individuals that cannot think and speak for themself thats all.
- save your money. I wish I'd hear this before but it is incredibly easy to blow off money in your first year esp at tmu. There are food and shopping places in every corner, so if you have the money/savings it's easy to get in the habit of buying food or a sweet treat every day. Many of us aren't working during school either. Just remember that each course you take cost money, if you need to take it again or online it cost money, your homework textbooks and lab equipment often costs money, and if you are on osap you will need money to pay it back! just be careful 🥲
- chang policy. I had to learn this one the hard way too. If you would like to take a course virtually through chang the refund policy is NOT the same as in person courses. If you change your mind about the course and want a full policy, you need to drop the course 5 BUSINESS DAYS before it begins if you want a full refund. I dropped a course 4 business days before and had to pay 50% for a course I did not take.
- time management because the workload is intense. engineering is not easy but time management can make your degree manageable and not feel impossible. it may be hard to find the routine and flow that works for you, but if I can give any advice while you do it is to make use of the time you have when you have it. Use resources like a planner, google cal, to-do lists, reminders etc to stay on top and make time for everything. being able to manage your time can save you a lot of panic and stress in midterm and final season. although the workload can get overwhelming, break your tasks down and take it day by day, but make sure you get done what you need too.
- start group projects early, especially CEN100. you will encounter many group projects during your first year, and most of the important ones happen near the end of the semester. I highly suggest you urge you and your group to get started or at least plan/break down tasks early, ideally from the get go when it is assigned. trying to coordinate with group members who are all busy with the end of the semester can be difficult and makes room for conflict to arise. not to mention starting early gives you time to seek help and critique from your TA. if you need to be that person, hold the group accountable and make sure you guys do not leave it for last min.
- don't compare yourself. everyone comes from different educational and social backgrounds. for some it may come as a shock to be surrounded by people who are as smart as you if not probably smarter. it is so easy to compare yourself and your success to others and it can easily become discouraging. just know that although you will meet people doing great while you may be near flunking, everyone is still struggling and finding it difficult. they may have different learning styles from you that makes it easier for them to learn new material, or they may have come from a school/background where they have already learned it. that doesn't mean you can't get to that level tho, for some it just takes some extra effort and that is okay.
- connect with your TA's and profs and build a relationship with them. You won't always come across a friendly or dedicated instructor, but if you feel you you have give them the chance to get to know and remember you, go to office hours and your tutorials even if they are optional. chances are they may be willing to give you advice or insight on what is on the midterm/final, or they could be the reason your mark has been boosted enough for you to pass. this is not always the case, but it often is.
- it will be a learning curve and takes time to adjust. as much as people can advise and warn you, you won't know what you are getting yourself into until you are actually in it. university for most people is a whole different ball park, let alone an engineering degree. you likely may not find your circle, your flow and your space right away and that is okay, it is part of the process that sets you up to be the best engineer you can be one day. some may be able to adjust quicker than others but just be patient with yourself, if you need to break up for your year into the spring/summer sem so be it. they say the first year of eng is the hardest bc it is such a large jump from high school, but remember it isn't impossible, so many people have done it and so can you. be kind with yourself, and use the many many resources that are available for your success.
- stay caught up in your classes to avoid burnout during midterm and exam season. one of my biggest regrets is missing so much class after midterms and having to cram for finals. Up until my midterms for both semesters I was caught up and following along in everything which made studying less time consuming bc I was already familiar with most the material, it was just filling in the gaps and practicing. Finals nearly took me out bc of the amount of cramming I had to do before I could even get to studying. not to mention seeing the material multiple times will make it stick better by logic. falling behind is common, but don't let it get too far because it truly is very hard to come back from. try to study as you go through the semester, and review/practice the lessons regularly. do not let the material leave your brain as soon as you learn it.
- it is okay to fail. many of us come from being high achievers in high school and getting above average grades. but you will come to learn that grades in the 45-60 range is normal. it is not the end of the world if you fail a course, especially in your first year. you are not dumb, you are not a failure, you are not letting anyone down. failing a course or two is normal and fairly common at least once during this degree. as a first year there is a lot of leeway and room for success, so you can just take it the next sem or the spring.
- make time for your family. this mostly goes for the commuters, but it can be difficult to make time for them especially when the semester ramps up. you may find yourself locked up in your room or coming home late from a library study sesh. but for many people they are your support system and even taking an hour away from your work to spend time with them and be a breath of fresh air and much needed to feel connected to them.
- go to student events! there are genuinely SO MANY that run throughout the year especially for us. I highly recommend to you to as many conferences as you can, GVIC, the WiE if you are female, the one from FYEO and more from MUES. these are great to make industry connections, learn things you don't learn in class, you can make friends, network, and grow yourself professionally. there are other more fun and chill student events that run too that can be great to destress during the sem and wind down with your friends.
- learn to make use of your time if your commute. Many of us who take the go have quite long commutes that can make it feel like a chunk of our day is gone. Something to help with that is just learning to manage the travel time and get something done. This can be being productive and study, taking a power nap, winding down/screen time before locking in at home, have lunch/dinner, making phone calls, etc. Plan your day out and what you are going to do during that commute time, it can truly help structure your day sm better.
- split your chegg. if you really need to buy it (its great for CHY homework and PCS) find some reliable and not snitchy friends and split it so its cheaper. although again, be careful using such tool incase you become dependent on it. it is a tool not solution, use it to learn how to do questions you don't have examples on, but still make sure you do most the hw for practice etc.
- don't get in the habit of skipping class. everyone says this yet we all do it. but I feel like I still need to include this since I have tasted my own medicine from skipping so much. its fine to skip here and there but don'ttttt make it a habit bc it is near impossible to break. its starts with one class, and then you skip the next one bc you didn't catch up and you're gonna be lost either way, and then it snowballs from there. its okay if you aren't caught up from previous missed lectures. just go, even if you just sit there and pay attention without taking notes. you will eventually catch up if you go, but letting it become a habit is just cutting yourself short and holding you back from sm academic success.
- don't overlook the easy classes. they WILL be your mark booster but you still need to put in the effort. for me they were CEN100, CHY102, my liberals, and CPS188. If you care about your gpa make sure you put effort into these classes bc they are very easy to do well in and will boost your gpa.
- its okay to feel imposter syndrome. I went through this a lot and felt like eng was not for me at many times because I would get in the habit of comparing myself. I don't think I felt like I belonged or felt like I was where I was supposed to be until the winter sem. as I mentioned it can take time to find your space but you will eventually. try to remember why you went into eng in the first place, and if it was just money joining clubs/going to eng events can help you find passion or belonging in it again. at the end of the day just trust your gut. if you truly truly feel like you can't see yourself working as an engineer maybe you could reconsider. but if you can but you are just struggling, I promise the imposter syndrome is normal but it will go away.
- NO all nighters. this is coming from someone who has pulled one too many this year and regrets it every single time. I feel like we all know this by now but just prioritize your sleep guys, this again comes down to time management but get enough sleep helps you SO MUCH to learn and digest all the material. you may be able to stay awake physically but you brain needs the rest. and ESPECIALLY DONT PULL ALL NIGHTERS BEFORE EXAMS. So many times this sem have I experience the worst brain fog of my life from doing this, you start to forget the most basic of things and concepts you may have perfected. it can be so easy to overlook our sleep but it truly is so important. don't sacrifice it, if you need to take the L bc you didn't study enough just take it, bc honestly studying more ahead would've saved you if you feel like you need to miss your sleep to cram.
- don't buy a single textbook. the only time you should is PCS and CHY bc it comes with the homework which you need to buy. other than that don't you can find it all online for free either on Anna's archive, the eng gcs or upper years.
- be prepared for midterms. tbh nothing could've prepared me, it is intense. esp if you are taking the full course load. the learning does not stop when midterms roll around, you will still have fast paced lectures, still have hw, still have regular quizzes and projects on top of studying for midterms. It can honestly feel suffocating in the midst of it and extremely overwhelming, but again this is where time management comes to play, use planning resources, and set yourself up for success from the very beginning of the sem. the biggest mistake people make is skipping lectures during midterms, because let me tell you, you will not make the time to catch up during midterm season, and even when it is over you are likely quite far behind or near finals. try your self to ensure you keep going to your classes during it. ALSO, make sure you study well for your midterms, for many people they do better on the midterm than the final so allocating those grades from the midterm is a great idea.
- check your emails! there are so many opportunities and resources that get sent to your inbox. this includes free tutoring, study halls, event details, on campus paid opportunities, club hirings etc.
- take care of yourself. like sm other things it can be so easy to overlook your basic needs and let yourself go. whether that be skipping meals or eating fast food alllllll the time, not sleeping, not showering and doing laundry, not giving yourself free time, etc, you need to look after yourself because no one else will. and the only way you can do well is ensuring you yourself are well. feed yourself healthy and balanced meals, get enough sleep, PLEASE SHOWER AND USE DEODORANT (the stereotype is in fact true), and take yourself outside on walks and with your loved ones. don't lose yourself along the way, it is all about balance.
- do not drop linear algebra in the fall. just listen to me on this one. even if you absolutely BOMB the midterm, don't get scared by it and decide to drop it. this happens essentially every year, and they usually, every year, make the final much easier and straight forward than the midterm is so it IS possible to pass. at the end of the day all you need is a 50 and it is very doable if you have the quiz/hw grades secured (free marks for most people) and study well for the final. try to get profs like majed and wang bc if you are near passing they may boost you enough too. and even if you did fail, so be it that is fine, you can take it in the winter but atleast you gave it youre all and said you tried but chances are you will pass. I say this bc the winter sections for linear algebra ive heard are much harder than the fall, although I think they curve at the end, it is a lottttt more theoretical and confusing so I recommend you push yourself for the fall and see where that takes you.
Anddddd I think that's all! I know that was a lot and maybe overwhelming but I hope it was insightful. if you have any questions or worries feel free to comment or pm.

Hello everyone, I'm 32 and seeking guidance as transition into the IT field. I have 5 years of experience in Excel data analysis, some automation experience with AutoHotkey, and a strong desire to learn. I recently left an unfulfilling job to pursue a more rewarding career. While I don't have a formal computer science degree, my practical experience and dedication are my driving forces.
Thankfully, my family is incredibly supportive and has offered to cover our living expenses for a year while I focus on learning and finding a new job. However, this transition hasn't been without its challenges:
Distractions: It's proving difficult to find a quiet and focused environment to study at home due to constant interruptions from my child and family members. I've explored the idea of studying at libraries or cafes, but the cost can add up quickly. I'm also open to the possibility of an unpaid internship to gain practical experience, but I recognize the need to strengthen my Python skills beforehand.
Intense Heat: The scorching temperatures in Tamil Nadu (33-35°C) are making it nearly impossible to concentrate on my studies. While an air conditioner would provide relief, I'm hesitant to dip into my equity investments (1.60 lac) to purchase one. I'm unsure whether to ask my wife to buy an AC on EMI or explore alternative cooling solutions.
Job Market Anxiety: The current layoffs and the growing presence of AI in the IT industry have me feeling uncertain about job security. As someone in their early 30s entering this field, I'm seeking advice on how to navigate this competitive landscape and remain relevant in the face of rapid technological advancements.
I'm incredibly grateful for any insights, suggestions, or experiences you're willing to share. Your guidance would be invaluable.
Thank you!

My community theater is set to do Beauty and the Beast next week and per usual, we get essentially 4 to 5 days to build on site in our location, which just happens to be the local high schools auditorium. We're obviously going to try to build the beast's Castle in some regard and have a fairly simple set concept, as we are trying to be frugal as well as practical given the short amount of time we have to build. The local high School drama department has allowed us to use anything they have in their scene shop and as such, I found some older choral risers that they have said we can use. There are approximately four 4 ft risers and several other descending height options. They are Wenger Versalite platforms, and lack the crossbar support, but have the platform as well as the six legs. How would you recommend going about using those? Can anyone recommend a message for stabilizing and securing such a platform or has anyone done something similar? Any sort of resources would be much appreciated.

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/Complex-Wing7114
I have 2 weeks to get away from my husband
Originally posted to offmychest
Thanks to u/soayherder for suggesting this BoRU
Previous BoRU
TRIGGER WARNING: controlling behavior, threats, abusive behavior, stalking, assault, physical violence, gaslighting
Original Post Apr 27, 2024
Throwaway account as my husband and In-laws are follow my main. I, 29 F, have been married to my husband, 30 m, who I'll call Alex. Alex and I met in college during our freshman year. We started off as just friends, and got married seven months ago. I've gotten along with his family, but we aren't super close but we're friendly enough. The problem is that Alex has begun to make me incredibly uncomfortable.
Firstly, he's begun to ask me who I'm meeting with, where, what we plan on doing, how long every single time I leave the house without him. At first, I just thought he was being protective and a good partner just in case something happened, but then he started checking my phone after the visits, vetting and researching each of my friends as well.
He also has been pursuing me to link my bank account to his, as he's "in charge" of the finances when he was perfectly fine with keeping them separate before. We fight about it almost every day.
Finally, yesterday when he was preparing to go on a work trip for two weeks in California, he demanded I wear a tracker so he could keep and eye on me while he's gone. I can't do this anymore, I feel like I'm suffocating and his family who I've spoken to about his worrying behavior just said he's being careful and protective as a good husband should. I need to gather my things together and find a way to be gone before he gets home without tipping him off.
He's always threatened that if he ever found me cheating on him he'd turn in divorce papers the same day. He keeps a filled out copy in his desk. I'm going to submit those the day I leave. But there's so much to do, bergen finding a new place to live, seeing if my job has any transfers available, packing and moving in two weeks. His return flight May 11th, so I need to move quickly. I'm posting here because I don't have any close family, and I can't risk dragging my friends into this as we share the same friends.I just needed a place to vent, and ask if anyone has any advice on the easiest and safest way to do this?
Edit: oh my god you guys are amazing! I never even thought to not use his divorce papers. I'll check for cameras before I start any packing or prepping. I may also shred his divorce papers just in case and look into getting a lawyer for myself. I'm in a no fault divorce state, that much I so remember which will help. I'll update again when I know more. The tracker he wants me to use is a small clip to put on the belt or waistband. I'll wear it unless I'm going or doing something related to me leaving. No pets yet thankfully.
Update Apr 28, 2024
So I've gotten a lot of support and helpful advice along with questions I thought I should clarify before I proceed with the update. Some asked why I'd be 'hiding' things from Alex regarding going out and who I'm meeting with. I don't, and I have nothing to hide. However when he begins to then double check everything I tell him with the other people there right down to each person I talked to and what I said. Did I send any text msgs, did I order food, how much did I eat, that's when it started to feel like I was slowly being pushed into a corner. It didn't start that bad, but gradually grew worse overtime.
All of the Reddit subs my in-law's families are part of are related gardening and diy so I highly doubt they'll see this, if so by the time they do, I'll hopefully be gone. I talked to my job and explained things to my manager. And they promised to look into openings in other states to see if they could get me into one. They'll have an update on that in three days. I trust that my bank account us secured, considering he's tried to get into it before and failed. I found one camera in the kitchen, another in the living room and one in our bedroom. As such, I've left them in place for now and done all other planning, either in the bathroom pretending I'm taking a bath.
I'm honestly staying away from the domestic violence services as my sister-in-law is unfortunately higher up in those considering she volunteers there and I have a feeling if I did show up there, they would know in a heartbeat. I can't look for apartments until I get the update from my work, but either or i'm still gonna be leaving the state. The day before I do I will be changing my number carrier and wiping my laptop and all of his electronics before I do.
I've met with 2 lawyers so far and had them look over the paperwork. My husband had prepared and both said that it did it have some clauses in it. That could have caused me some trouble down the line. What alarmed all of us close the fact that several of those clauses dealt with future children, and not as a hypothetical. Like several hair suggested I have a feeling he fully intended on getting me pregnant to keep me trapped and tied to him.
There are 3 other locations. My job could send me to and I have. As a precaution Begun looking into all 3 cities and housing in the areas. Just in case one of those, this is the one they send me to. Even if they don't have an opening that they can push me into then I will just have to quit, move and figure things out on my own. I have enough money to live and survive for a few months until I can pick up another job.
Unfortunately all of our friends are mutuals and would likely be unaware of the consequences of saying or sharing anything I do or say with my husband. I don't have any surviving close family and obviously my in laws are not a good resource to rely on. I am on my own unfortunately, other than the wonderful bonds, i've begun to make here. I will update again if I get more information or something else happens. Otherwise all update when my work gets back to me. I do plan on leaving before he returns, though. Just to make sure that i'm not anywhere near here at that time.
Update 2 Apr 30, 2024
Good news! My work has an opening I qualify for that will not only shift me across the country, but also comes with a salary increase as well. I've started telling my in laws and friends that I'm planning a surprise outing for when my husband gets back for just the two of us. This way, people don't give me odd looks if they see me out and about. I've even gone as far as asking MIL to show me his favorite recipes.
Meanwhile, I've found a moving company that while small is willing to work in a storm. The reason is in five days, we're supposed to get hit with a large storm front. I plan to shut off the breaker and say we lost power if he asks just as several people here suggested and even send him a short clip of the storm.
I will have all of my stuff moved that afternoon, and I will be flying out once the weather has cleared enough to do so. I have a lawyer who will push my divorce through, and I've filled out the necessary paperwork so that I don't have to be here for it. I'm not suing for assets or alimony and I've shredded his divorce papers as well. I've set up a cheap payphone plan through cricket until this is all said and done at which point I will find a new carrier, number and phone. This one is being wiped and left behind.
My laptop is provided by my work, and the IT department inspected it thoroughly and it was clean thankfully. No other electronic aside from my laptop and new phone will be coming with me. If alex needs to talk to me, he can do it through my lawyer. Not sure if anything else will happen, my fingers are crossed that he doesn't think anythings amiss until after I leave - and I'm not turning the breaker back on when I do. He can when he gets home. My work is covering the plane ticket, so that at least is one expense I don't have to finagle in.
Update 3 May 7, 2024
Update 3: I have 2 weeks to get away from my husband.
It's been a busy week, but I've gotten so much done. Firstly, I am now out of the house and am currently in a hotel while I look for an apartment. It's a big city, bustling with people no matter where you look. We had a pretty bad storm system hit back home, that actually lasted two days. High winds, thunder, lightning and even hail everywhere. I didn't take much from the house, my documents, clothes and important sentimental items. I left all of the furniture and electronics behind. I cleaned the house top to bottom and took pictures on my phone so he couldn't claim I damaged anything when I left.
My lawyer has already started divorce proceedings, and my husband will be served on the 8th. His plane is due to land early morning, and the sheriff will be there at the house waiting for him. He is very much about public appearances and reputation. My lawyer will be calling him as well to inform him that I am more than willing to air out everything to the public about his actions if it means securing my freedom from him. I will go to court as long as I must to get this pushed through.
I haven't told our friends or his in-laws yet, I will do that while he is on the flight to prevent him from getting wind of it before he's handed the divorce papers. I will be calling around and explaining why we're getting divorced, to try and prevent him from twisting this into somehow being my fault. I don't want him trying to claim I had an affair or something so I want to get the truth out before he can twist this.
I'm... doing okay. I'm tired, but yet I feel almost jittery and off-kilter. I keep looking over my shoulder and monitoring what I say even when I don't really need to anymore. Hopefully that will fade soon. My work is covering the cost of the hotel, and I'm working on getting my other things in order. I also need to find a new GP as I want to get a full test just to make sure everything is okay. I don't know when my next update will be, probably when the divorce papers are filed or if we have to go to court to push them through. I will try to keep my head up, but it feels like I'm in a whirlwind or something with so many things to do and think about. I kinda thought it would be easier once I got out of the house but while the fear is smaller, somehow the number of tasks only seems to have grown.
Update 4 May 14, 2024
Sorry I haven't updated for a while, things got hectic and a bit chaotic honestly. Firstly, I'm working on getting an apartment still and have applications in at three different places and will hopefully hear back from them soon. I'm still going into work here at the new location, so I don't have to worry about burning through my emergency savings completely. I've gotten a lot of emails from Alex, his family and our old friend group asking question after question. I have only sent one return email to Alex, explaining that I don't believe we are truly compatible, and it is best we separate now. That his treatment of me when I'd done nothing to deserve as such was just as much of a deal breaker as cheating was for him.
I ended the email with the statement that I would not be contacting him further and anything else he needed to pass on to me or vice versa would be done through my lawyer. For his family and friends, I just typed up one email outlining everything that had happened and why I left. I told them I wished them no ill will, but that such treatment of his wife and partner was not acceptable. That should Alex get remarried in the future, I wished they would help support both partners and not just Alex.
Alex, from what my lawyer told me, was livid when he was served. The sheriff actually ended up booking him for assault on an officer and menacing due to the threats he was shouting. His father bailed him out in a few hours, but with the testimony of the sheriff, my lawyer believes I have a very good chance at getting a restraining order. Alex, upon returning to the house, apparently lost his temper again, breaking the dining table into pieces as well as the tv, and putting several holes in the walls. At least that's what one of the emails from one of our friends reported as Alex called him to help him clean up the mess.
My lawyer already has pictures of the house I took, with timestamps as evidence nothing had been damaged by me. My friend reported that Alex tried to claim I'd been the one to trash the house but the holes in the wall were at head height - Alex is 6'3", and I'm 5'4" so he knew that was false. Either way, taking the pictures definitely will help me so again thank you everyone here for the advice because I never would have thought of that on my own. My work won't share details of where I am, as I do work with some higher end clientele who value security and that information won't be gossiped about and no, I'm not some stripper or escort. I deal with contracts, notary and business management. As such, even if Alex tried to use my work to find me, he wouldn't succeed.

NEW UPDATE

Update on leaving May 26, 2024
It’s been a little bit, and I thought I’d answer some questions before giving my update. It may be a while after this until things change.
Firstly, No I didn’t bring my car. The public transport here is good enough to use without needing one. I have secured an apartment, and the building has good security. You need a key card to enter, and there is a security guard at a desk right by the entrance to the building. As part of my contract, I gave them a photo of Alex and his family so that even in the off chance they do find me, they won’t be let in.
The responses I got from the emails varied. His family said I was overreacting, and that I owe Alex an apology for the problems this has caused him. The pending criminal charges puts him at risk of losing his job if he’s convicted. Alex sent a long email, apologizing and pleading for me to come home. He said he was worried for me, that he is willing to go to therapy if it will appease me. He wants us to remain together, and he didn’t think leaving was an appropriate response to his genuine concern and worry for my health and safety. The friends gave somewhat lacking replies, saying that they didn’t think Alex was ever going to hurt me and that I shouldn’t be letting my imagination run away wild. As much as I want to say I was surprised by the lack of support, I’m honestly not.
He intends to fight the divorce. I am letting my lawyer handle it, and I am also pursuing a protective order as well. Once I got approved for my apartment, I also froze my credit. I’ve changed my phone carrier and number, as well as making sure none of my documents list Alex as next of kin or POA.
Some have asked why I was so paranoid about Alex and his possible future actions. The answer for that actually is somewhat simple – my grandmother. I loved that woman to bits. As a teen, she explained why my grandfather was never around. He was extremely abusive and manipulative, and her generation didn’t allow divorce really. She wouldn’t have been able to buy a house or get a good enough job to support her and my mother on her own. As such, she endured it, shielded my mom as she could until my grandfather died. When I felt like I may have been overreacting, I remembered how she’d said she’d always wished she’d been able to see grandfather for what he was early on when she may have been able to annul the marriage.
I don’t know when I’ll update again, maybe when the divorce goes through or if something big happens but until then, I’m just trying to keep my head above the water.
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7

Hello everyone, I'm 32 and seeking guidance as transition into the IT field. I have 5 years of experience in Excel data analysis, some automation experience with AutoHotkey, and a strong desire to learn. I recently left an unfulfilling job to pursue a more rewarding career. While I don't have a formal computer science degree, my practical experience and dedication are my driving forces.
Thankfully, my family is incredibly supportive and has offered to cover our living expenses for a year while I focus on learning and finding a new job. However, this transition hasn't been without its challenges:
Distractions: It's proving difficult to find a quiet and focused environment to study at home due to constant interruptions from my child and family members. I've explored the idea of studying at libraries or cafes, but the cost can add up quickly. I'm also open to the possibility of an unpaid internship to gain practical experience, but I recognize the need to strengthen my Python skills beforehand.
Intense Heat: The scorching temperatures in Tamil Nadu (33-35°C) are making it nearly impossible to concentrate on my studies. While an air conditioner would provide relief, I'm hesitant to dip into my equity investments (1.60 lac) to purchase one. I'm unsure whether to ask my wife to buy an AC on EMI or explore alternative cooling solutions.
Job Market Anxiety: The current layoffs and the growing presence of AI in the IT industry have me feeling uncertain about job security. As someone in their early 30s entering this field, I'm seeking advice on how to navigate this competitive landscape and remain relevant in the face of rapid technological advancements.
I'm incredibly grateful for any insights, suggestions, or experiences you're willing to share. Your guidance would be invaluable.
Thank you!

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