Oh, I’ll attempt to keep this short because y’all don’t need to know the full story lol. Basically, I’m a trans woman, I have a good friend who also a trans woman, and another good friend who is a trans man. The rest of our friendship group are cis. Me and the trans guy (we’ll call him C) have been out for a while - I met our friends having already begun to transition and C started basically within a year of meeting the group. Our other trans friend, we’ll call her S, came out nearly two years ago now.
Now, C and I are very aware that it takes time to get used to coming out and it can be awkward at first. We obviously supported S, even when she seemed to be struggling with it a lot more than either of us felt like. But it’s gotten to the point where her negative self-perception is actively impacting us as other trans people. I think I have it less bad, because she’s less likely to say stuff to me (maybe because as another trans woman, she knows I have had the same direct experiences and can kind of call her out on her bullshit).
But there is some /nonsense/ going on here, guys. She will talk at length about her “internalised transphobia”, but it’s not giving internalised when you tell another trans woman that we’re just men in dresses. It’s not giving internalised when you’re constantly explaining being a man/what guys are like to C, as though he has zero experience and would never know in a million years. (He’s also an immigrant who grew up in East Asia, where gender roles are different). She’s also told him trans guys are “less trans”, whatever that means, and that she wishes she could be “treated like a woman” like he is. Which. 👍 cool. Funny how she doesn’t say that to me - a woman. She’s always picking apart social interactions which could be interpreted as misgendering me, too.
I finally managed to get C alone to discuss this recently. I kind of thought it wasn’t bothering him because he’s super chill, but apparently it’s really pissing him off too. We’ve both decided that it’s probably time we say something. Our worry is that she might ignore us if we bring it up. My opinion she always ignores, and she’s worse with C. Besides, I don’t trust him to not accidentally hurt her feelings because he’s really blunt, but I don’t want to do this without support.
It’s obvious she respects our cis friends opinions more, especially the cis women, who she’ll listen to always. I know a few other members of our group have picked all this up too. I’m wondering if we should get them involved, but I really don’t want this to be a big thing. It’s just gotten to the point where she needs to cut it out, and I don’t know how to tell her without hurting her, while still getting her to actually listen.

Ive never really known how to put this into words but bare with me.
I have been playing video games for the better part of my life, grew up playing all sorts of formats from consoles to handhelds to PCs (blah blah you have heard it all before and are probably in the same boat). Ive played pretty much all genres of games over the years where game reviews didnt matter (or exist) and online guides were out of the picture as having internet on was a luxury.
Fast forward 20 odd years and im in this weird cycle trying to connect with a type of game that i never played or understood properly.
MMORPGs
Promising the allure of an all you can eat buffet dinner that caters to an almost immeasurable audience, it seems almost too captivating. So why cant i get into it?
Everytime i try to dip my toes in i get hesitant, whether its the vast backlog of history that i didnt get to experience or the time i know i no longer have to commit to playing the game as i get older, i get overwhelmed and end up not playing. No matter how many characters i roll, how many classes i try i just cant spend more than an hour playing it without feeling like a chore. So why do i keep thinking every time will be different and why do I keep coming back to try again every few months?
I read other posts like this on here from time to time but i reflect on them differently because their attitude comes from experiences from the 'good ol days'.
Maybe im overanalysing things (and most likely i am) but I just cant seem to pinpoint why the genre doesn't draw me in and keep me here even though on the surface they seem like my perfect type of video game.
Does this resonate with anyone else? Surely i cant be alone on this?

Hello everyone so I am still confused between streams. Board results came and I scored 74%. From the beginning i thought of taking Science stream but my school said they will give me that stream if I qualified the board result criteria(80%+). Since I didn't they didn't gave me Science stream. My family from the start has always said to think deeply about taking Science stream but even at this point I can't decide. My parents earlier said to take Commerce as I will get more time to practice coding. For Science stream I will have to change schools. I am thinking to do the same for Commerce as even though I have commerce here the environment is not good as most of the classmates are like me who wanted science stream and the school is not supporting me at all, they earlier were not allowing me to take maths also. I want to pursue a cs profession which is reliant on maths and a little bit on physics and was studying Science stream it was going well, but now I don't know what to do. How can I be sure in myself in which stream to choose. I think I am facing this issue as I was forcefully given Commerce stream without my choice.
Because of this stream thing I have not built a solid base in any of the subjects which is affecting me a lot, I am behind the syllabus.
How can I decide which stream to choose? I want to pursue a CS profession but was not given Science stream and am rethinking my decision.
Should I change schools even for Commerce stream? I have stayed here since the beginning but it is not supporting me at all.

hi everyone! here’s the link to the OG post (https://www.reddit.com/LegalAdviceUK/s/rJKAuDrTej) incase you missed it. It’s been over a year now, i wish i had a bit more of an update but this is all.
the day after i presented all my “evidence” to the station & the officer sent my copies off with the ticket issued on the night, i sent an email to the camera & tickets office with a timeline of what happened and all of the paperwork. someone replied and said once they receive the ticket in office they will review. a week later, the insurance company finally sent me an indemnity letter, the conversations i had with them were honestly like pulling teeth - will never deal with them again, but i got it, sent it straight over, same stock reply “sure once we get the ticket in office…” (you get it).
3 weeks later im emailing again - “any update?” because i did NOT want this coming back on me or them claiming they sent me post and i didn’t respond etc etc. still the same. 6 weeks later, still the same.
and a whole year later still the same! no one has responded to me, no mail, no email reply, no points on my licence, nothing.
i suppose i do have one question - how much time before they can’t charge me with it anymore? like for example can they send me a letter in 2 years time stating they found i was liable?
also don’t you think it’s a bit cheeky how shit they can make you feel about these kind of situations and then just leave you in the lurch? i don’t expect a sorry, but some peace of mind would be nice!

• still in england :)

I love the Devil’s Roar. I had an… experience the other day. I’d like to waste some of your time by relating it to you in a fashion far more time consuming than it should be.
I have three other friends I often play with. None of them were on. I like vaults. I like ashen vaults most as an early-game min-maxer. Usually ashen captain vaults are quiet and treat me great when solo.
So I did a Gold Hoarder’s Medley the other day. Of course it ended at Fetcher’s Rest. The island I frequent the most as an Ashen Vault Hunter. I approach it as it’s erupting which is great. I get the best cooldown possible. After securing all the treasure, I even stay in as the vault closes so I can grab more gold piles. I can get all treasure out usually before the door closes, but you can’t get most of the gold before then while solo. I also have a harpoon boat, which will speed up the aftermath.
All is fine. But wait. It’s rumbling while I’m in there. No worries. It’s only been like eight minutes since the last eruption.
As I get back to my boat after drowning, my boat is on fire from the obvious ball of magma that has inevitably hit it. Great. Fuck this luck. Fuck this timing. I should sail off and wait for it to stop, right? I even try to cannon back to the island after getting out of range of the falling balls of fire, but I only make it half way to the island so Mermaid back to my ship. Ten minutes later the blasts stop and it is faster to just sail back. Let’s get back to the island. Now obviously based on the length of this story, the outer vault door is closed. That’s okay. I’m four Chests of Ancient Tributes away from the commendation. The same amount for the keys placed commendation (which has better sails tbh). It may be 1 am and I need to work tomorrow, but I can throw another ancient captain’s vault voyage up and double stack the loot currently sitting between the two vault doors.
Believe it or not, my next Ashen Captain’s vault voyage’s fist compass gave me an X on Flintlock Peninsula. 15 minutes later I’m in my solo sloop and I was approaching Fetcher’s NW cove again. And you wouldn’t believe how lucky I was. It was erupting, so I could approach right after it finished.
Fast forward to me finishing the puzzle for the Chest of Ancient Tributes and placing it outside in the hallway. I still have quite a few more pieces of treasure to move out, and the third obvious part of this story came to fruition. There was an earthquake, and that earthquake lead to a second eruption within eight minutes of the last. And it being 2am meant I couldn’t justify three stacking what would have been a huge solo payout. And something that would have gotten me that much closer to level 100 Gold Hoarders and some cool sails that would indicate exactly what sort of weird PvE player I am, and I found myself sailing away from the island just to find that for the second time, what was now a double stack including two Chests of Ancient Tributes was stuck between two closed vault doors.
I probably should have just let my ship burn down and lost my Emissary flags for the double stacked ashen vault I could have moved to my rowboat, then sailed back to Fetchers to collect. But for some (noobish) reason, I though I could sail to safety, keep my level 5 emissary flag, and get a huge-ass payout.
That was a long way to tell a pretty pointless story, but I hope some other Ashen Vault voyagers were able to appreciate it, and provide some PvP players the opportunity to roll their eyes and wish they could have ruined my two hours worth of effort on the high seas.
Everybody has experienced that early game struggle, so I guess there is something for all to enjoy.
-A PS5 player.

I 22F and my bf 25M are currently on a break for the week. I’m doing my uni finals at the moment, and I have been a bit stressed. I noticed my bf wasn’t really talking to me the way he normally would and I asked him what’s up. He sent me a really long text detailing now he thinks we are never on the same page (1), he keeps thinking about how I read his diary (2), I called him my ex’s name by acccident (3), and he is stressed because I am frustrated about my exams (4). I’ll detail these more now.

1. He wants kids. I met him online and told him in my profile I was strictly against kids. Recently, I have come around about that, but I am still unsure. I’m not against them but I have explained I would need to do what I want and live my life a bit and have a house and job before I could decide that. I am also a child of divorce and saw how that really affected my mum, and I explained to him how that also put me on the fence. He said he doesn’t want to be with someone for years and it feel like a “waste” if it doesn’t work out kids wise and he doesn’t wanna start dating in his 30s. Another thing is travel. I had told him I would perhaps like to travel after uni, but I am forgoing that. I said it would be nice to go away on holiday like his other friend couples do maybe once a year, but he thought that I was insinuating we MUST go this year. I explained that I wasn’t expecting him to, because he wants to save for a house (rent), and he can’t get any hols anyway. He was really silent after that as if we had “argued” and in his eyes that was an argument he brought up this week. I didn’t raise my voice at him or argue, rather said that wasn’t what I meant and explained further.
   
2. This one is bad, I know. I was in a really bad place mentally, and I thought that something was wrong with him since he sometimes suffered from anxiety and dealing with the future. I had only read the last entry he put in and immediately after I read it I told him as I felt so guilty betraying him. I’ve apologised profusely and I’ve been going to counselling to help my own anxiety and depression. I wanna note that I’m not like that around him, it’s mainly when I’m by myself so he doesn’t really see that side of me. In the moment I was genuinely worried for him. I know it still makes what I did bad.
   
3. This one really tears me up every day. We were playing around, and instead of saying his name in a playful annoyed way I said my exes. He immediately shut down and wouldn’t talk to me or hear me out. In fact, he kicked me out of his house. I get that what I said was not nice to hear, and upon talking to my counsellor she said it was a common thing to do, and doesn’t mean I was thinking about my ex. I wanna say that I DO NOT think about them and have blocked and deleted them from my life. In doing that however, I did begin to spend more time with my gay bestie who happens to have the same name as my ex and I happened to talk to on that day. I really believe it was a mistake and I thought he was trying to move past it but he keeps bringing it up.
   
4. He doesn’t like to be around me when I’m stressed. When I’m frustrated, I’m not angry at him or raise my voice at him or be passive aggressive, it’s more so internalised at myself. He was offering me advice this year and feels like because I didn’t stick to a schedule to complete my uni tasks, I was ignoring him. I work last minute, it’s how I have always worked and I get great result. Not to mention, in his final uni year he was the same as me. I dont really get this argument to be honest.
   

I also wanna note that he told me he wasn’t sure if this is the “real” me or if I was on my best behaviour at the start of the relationship. Everything was great at the start, but in my first week of uni my grandmother does, I then had to have surgery 2 months later to remove breast tumours (non cancerous), and I guess that and uni stress really caught up with me. He saw that I was doing better by going to the gym and feeling better about myself, but said that I snap back at times and don’t like myself. I think this is normal as some people have off days but I think he’s annoyed by it.
Also, at the start of our relationship he was really anxious about us, and I helped him through it. He was also stressed about jobs, and I had helped him prep and make a new cv as I’m good at that stuff and he got job offers. In fact at one point he said to me that he thought I was with him for money. I had more in savings than him at that point and paid for things/went 50/50. I am also lined up for a higher earning job than him when I’m out of uni. So, I guess I’m asking what should I do about this? I genuinely love him but my parents have said he’s not treating me nicely, and my friends have said the only thing that I have done wrong is read his diary.

At first I thought happy people basically meant low neuroticism. But I saw some JP vids where he talked about how it mainly correlated with extraversion? so it seems happiness/sadness is not one dimension but rather two, so a person can be both often happy and often sad, while another one might be neutral all the time.
When I think about it it makes intuitive sense. I know some neurotic people who also strike me as very happy, i guess just more emotional in general.
kind of a half-baked post but I'd just like to get some more thoughts on this

So back in September I was out all day helping a friend move into his new house and went to a baseball game after then came back home to find my dad dead on the kitchen floor. I (26M) was still living at home with just my dad at the time and me and him were more like best friends and roommates rather than father and son, we had a bond that was special and I’ll cherish it for the rest of my life, but the day of everything seemed normal I went out for the day and he was his normal self going about his daily routine and he was texting me while I was out, and the last text he sent asking if I’ll be home after the game I didn’t see right away and replied a couple hours later and when I did answer he didn’t get back which I knew was weird bc he always gets back fairly quickly. So I drive home and then I go in and find him laying on the floor with his mouth open and his face just looked off. The ambulance came and took him to the hospital then said they tried everything but couldn’t do anything and later told me they found a large piece of chicken stuck in his throat and he choked to death.
So since then I feel like I’m just lost in life and nothing seems the same at all, being in the house just feels off without him, I’ve been trying to move out but everything is out of my price range and I always remember him saying he wants me to take over the house when he passes but it just doesn’t feel right there without him. I feel like I’m useless at work every day bc the picture of him on the floor is just mounted into my brain.
Everyone in my family talks to me about counseling but idk how much that’ll help when I just feel completely out of it and lost every single day, I’m just hesitant on it and I tried being with my mom but she just constantly brings up the bad memories with them since they divorced 7 years ago and my friends don’t seem like they’re there for me like when it first happened. I feel like I don’t really have anyone in the family to talk to and it just sucks knowing the closest person I had in my life is gone and I have no idea how to go forward especially with Father’s Day and his birthday coming up I just keep looking at pictures and videos of him and i break down completely and can’t sleep. Just looking for anyone with similar experiences to give some advice

My boyfriend and I have been together for five years, and this is my first year teaching. I work with another teacher, and we teach students in their first year of primary school. So most of them are six years old. They’re all lovely children. I feel very lucky that I can help teach such young children with such bright minds. I love it a lot, I like the difference between the days and I love the children. But because they’re so young, they’re very touchy. They love hugs, holding onto my hands and my legs, sitting on my lap. And I don’t mind, they’re very adorable and I think it’s very sweet.
But it means by the time I get home, I almost can’t stomach the idea of being touched. I just want to finish my work, eat, have a shower, and go to sleep most days. I don’t mind cuddling, but most days the idea of being touched sexually, I can’t tolerate. I love him, and I can understand why he would find that tiring, but I just can’t do it. I’ve tried to explain it to him, but it’s a bit of an odd concept, which makes it tricky. The amount we sleep together has dropped drastically in the last year, and I do feel bad about it. It’s a bit of a mental block as well, being around children so much, it just makes me feel a bit gross doing that sometimes and really puts me off it. It’s irrational, but it’s just the way it is.
But this is making him a bit sick of my work. It also really doesn’t help that the teacher that I work with is a man. He’s great, excellent with the children, and a really good teacher. He’s a lot of help, especially since this is my first time teaching a classroom. But my boyfriend is a bit sensitive about it. But I don’t really choose who I teach with, and just because he’s a man, it’s not like I can’t work with him. In any workplace, you will be working with men. Although it doesn’t help the children sometimes ask if we’re married, but they’re little, they don’t understand. So the fact I don't really want to sleep with my boyfriend often bothers him more than I think it normally would.
I feel like all of this is making our relationship a bit strained sometimes. I don't know if all of it will make sense, because I don't have English as my first language, but I think it should. I'm just a bit stuck on how to deal with this. Because obviously this is my job, I love it a lot, but it just results in all of this as well. He doesn't seem to understand how much it affects whether I want to sleep with him or not, and I've tried explaining it, but I think it's one of those things that's really difficult to understand and I don't really know what to do.

Alright Apes,
I was out walking my dog, ready to get back home to go to sleep, and then it happened. I did one last check of superstonk to get my dopamine hit that is our community and well, I got more than I asked for. Now I have too much energy to sleep because I am so fucking hyped for what I found. So here I am.
This beautiful post popped up at nearly midnight my time.
When it said watch in reverse, I had mixed emotions because one of my favorite post was the one with the opening to the White Stripes glitch mob remix. Go watch the video if you haven’t already. That’s one of my favorite songs for very personal reasons and the idea that GME was about to unleash something that caused a glitch was very exciting to me. I wanted that to be the foreshadowing that RK left us with.
But I like every other GME theory I read, it consumes me. I’m obsessed. So what the heck, let’s go watch everything in reverse.
Lucky for me I realized very quickly that when you go to the X iphone app and watch the latest video in full screen, you can just swipe up to see the next video. So, the next hour of my night was planned out.
That was an hour ago. I am so hyped about what I saw that I’ve decided to sit down and write out the my whole interpretation of what I saw. I don’t have answers for every single post but there does seem to be a theme that matches the theory that these are meant to watch in reverse.
Buckle up.
One last things before I get started. I think DFV has been here all along. I think he has read all of the DD and I think he made his memes with all of that in mind. I highly doubt he knows anything for sure but is just a fan of the DD. Just like I am. And there is one DD I fell in love with from the first moment I read it. I think he did too and this is his thesis. He has read all the tea leaves and doesn't think anyone has put it together like he has so he is sharing his interoperation of the DD, the market conditions, and the news and is going to do one last DD himself.
Ok. Here we go.
Oh, and this is not financial advice.
Ok. Here we go for real.
ET: This might actually be him saying goodbye for now. Hopefully not forever (still kinda sad we never got a ET 2).
Horse Gift: Not sure how to interpret this one. Maybe foreshadowing that he found (or was gifted) the GME bull thesis and at that point, he wasn’t sure if it was a good thing for a bad things. “We’ll see”
Coldplay Backwards: GME had to pull back for him to find the right time to get in.
Forest Running: And then it started running.
Original Sheet Music: Then he started meme. The memes were “MIRACULOUS”.
My favorite post – The White Stripes Glitch Mob video intro: Seriously, if you haven’t watched the video, go now. It’s hype af. This is the video that marks the Jan 2021 glitch. The sneeze.
MIB Kitty: And then GME became RK’s galaxy.
That’s not a Knife: He was the memelord at this point but shorties wanted his gains.
Westworld’s Bernard: Then the bear thesis’ started coming out but we can’t see what we are programed not to see. We were already programed at this point thanks to the bulleproof bull thesis.
Ocean’s Gang in Prison: And then we got thrown in a prison together when so many people bought at high prices.
Beavis and Butthead: We were obsessed with Cohen at this point. We hung on to every tweet. Sex for Dummies was a very popular one. Lot’s of theories popped up with this tweet.
A Few Good Men: DFV visits Congress!
Elaine Dancing: Is this him celebrating his gains and/or not getting thrown in prison?
Aladdin: They tried to take his gains away?
Truman > Mourinho’s In Big Trouble: He was gagged.
ASIP In Therapy: RK went to therapy and found he loved making memes and GME?
Newman: Talking about his experience as his new life as the United States GameStop memer and all the requests he was getting for memes.
Eddie Murphy: Chronicling his time as a memer
SNL The Shooting AKA Dear Sister: Not sure on this one.
Steve Wilkos: RK is ours and we are going to stick beside him
Succession: RK was reading so much about how he was the villain
Borne: More struggles with his identity as the GameStop memer and deciding what to do next.
CNBC > .50: Why does everyone hate RK?
The Dude: Not sure on this one.
Garden State: foreshadowing the jam that he’s about to get into this his next (older) posts
Every Everywhere All at Once: more foreshadowing.
Stand by Me: There’s a game of chicken going on. Shorts vs HODLers?
School of Rock: Reminding us what where here for. This journey isn’t going to be perfect but it’s Rock and Roll.
TeddyBears – Punk Rocker: He has both hands off the wheel now but he’s still along for the ride.
You Can’t Stop What’s Coming: Self-explanatory with likely last-minute cameo of the Chicago (where was Citadel founded?) BEARS thanks to the world’s most famous coke rat market manipulator.
Sicario 2: He’s asking us if we are ready to be the “villain” with him.
Flip Mode: If you really want to party with the Kitty, show him what you got (make some more memes people!!!)
The Shining: Our view of RK at work making his memes for the past 3 years.
500 days of Summer: Talking about why he does what he does. Because it’s going to last forever (more foreshadowing).
Luca: Him laughing at us not knowing everything. Just forget about it if you don’t understand, he has more for you.
Signs 1: This is where things get interesting. This is where we start seeing the signs. Connecting dots. We found something legit in all the DD.
Signs 2: The signs all pointed to GameStop. It’s all about GameStop and what they are going. Nothing else matters.
Signs 3: Are we the aliens? All of our best DD writers talking to each other were some of my favorite moments over the past 3 years. [There are theories about what these signs said and I will go back and fill that in later, I’m getting sleepy]
Signs 4: He is asking us if we believe the DD.
Signs 5: RK is one of us. Assuming we are the Aliens in these signs videos, he is telling us he is one of us.
The Modern Animal: We need to get a little crazy if we are going to take on the big city (NYC? Wall Street?)
Broad City: We made our own language. Memes. SuperStonk is a place for best friend with time to shoot.
GooseBumps: I THINK THIS IS WHERE WE ARE TODAY. RK is letting his briefcase of memes open and warning bears.
Everyone’s favorite Boss: Here some the SIGNS (memes for those who are not keeping up). He is going to his us ONE MORE TIME.
Pay Attention: NOW FUCKING PAY ATTENTION because he isn’t going to do this again.
Kill Bill: It’s time to fight and we are bad asses.
JigSaw + Kansas City Shuffle: Are you ready for the game? Because GameStop has you covered. Everything up to this point has been the inciting incident and catalyst of the Kansas City Shuffle. There is a very short scene where he says, “are you watching closely”? I saw a comments days ago that I can’t find and the very high level paraphrased version is that scene is from the Prestige and all of those hats were a result of him cloning himself. I think that represents the synthetics that plague our market. (I will find that comment that explains it better and go back to watch the movie myself and update this).
Shawshank: RK is telling us all it really takes is pressure and time to break out of their prison. While he was in prison, he went back to get his financial education. We also need an activist (investor, RC). There is a lot more nuance we can try to extrapolate form this one. I’ll save that for later.
Radiohead Karma Police: They have run the price down far enough. They have been leaking gas this whole time. It’s time for the match to be lit.
Neo: This is where Neo figures out how to work the matrix. The market is fake and everyone is mad. We all know it. When it comes to the market, we all took the red pill, and we see it for what it is.
Bullet Scene: Might need some help deciphering this one. I think it’s about how we (maybe not us but the general public) perceive the market. We see cause and effect but that’s now how it works. I think he is telling us that we don’t fully understand the market but our instincts are right and we just feel it. I think we as a community have that instinct.
Fury: Every boss is going to feel like the last one. They are going to pound us with misinformation, price manipulation, and anything else they can come up. But they are just taunting us to whoop some ass.
Trueman Show: They are going to hit us with everything they have but HOLD ON!
Me, Myself, & Irene: Them tanking the price is going to change how we feel and who we are.
Red Right Hand: Might need some help with this one too. The red hand man is stalking someone and the other person can’t do anything about it? Not sure who is who here.
Beat Saber: Might need some help with this too. Is he calling all freaks to show up because we are about to go to war?
Keith and Jake SNL: Everyone thinks Keith is crazy lol
Seinfeld: Calling out the memestock docs for being stupid. He had to some back and tell everyone to “Shut Up Bitch”
Shut Up Bitch: He delivers his best line to the people making him out to be a Vilian.
Coffee Mug Breaks: He is asking us to convince him to do it again.
Bane: RK is saying everything is going as planned.
Oceans (again): RK has been waiting for this time and it was all part of the plan.
Snoop: There was so much drama at GME. People had to be fired because they were someone dressed up as something else. Moles?
Spiderman: It’s time for Keith Gill to become Roaring Kitty again.
Pizza Slices: Guy on the left is a shorty. He is getting mad with how popular things got with the thesis and how many people bought.
Missy Elliot ft Luda: Giving us confidence that he has a worldwide audience and he is about to kill all the rumors.
In Love with RC: He is telling us that RC is the right guy. Don’t doubt him.
Guardians: Everyone already knows who is in charge. Stop fighting to be in charge.
CNBC again: Some of the misinformation actually said RK is in charge. He is not. He is busy drawing dicks (memes).
Oceans (again): I think he is saying that no one person is in charge. It took everyone to give GME all that money. Or maybe it AVOCADO-IN-MY-ANUS all along?
Breaking Bad: His side still hasn’t been told?
Fight Club: RK finally accepting he is DFV
Nice Guy: He is still a nice guy despite what people are saying.
Day and Night: I think he is talking about his struggles day and night over the last 3 years.
Dave: He could’ve ignored it all but he couldn’t stand it. He’s about to keep it real with us.
Star Wars: help me fill in the blank on this one.
Ozarks: help me fill in the blank on this one.
Grim Reaper: The hedgies are trying to figure out what is going on with GameStop. They are I a holding pattern and will be coming with more hitman when what happens in the rest of the tweets goes down.
*******This is where shit gets real********
The Prestige: Alright. Put your tinfoil hat on tight. Here is my interpretation of this one. The magician makes something disappear, but the audience wants to be fooled so we are not actually looking for the secret. So, when something disappears we don’t clap because it’s not as impressive. But as soon as it comes back, the fights is on**~. I think the NFT marketplace is going to come back~**. But I think it’s going to come back as something else. I think they built the blockchain infrastructure for something other than the NFT marketplace. That is when shit is going to go crazy. Don’t believe me, keep reading.
Brand New GME: They finally embrace what everyone has been calling them. They show up one day looking sexy as fuck and blow everyone’s minds.
Prisoner: And now the prisoner (GME’s true price) has true FFFRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM.
The fallout: The hedgies are going to beg us to sell our shares at 14 grand but the nature of us is pure CRAZY. We all knew who was calling on the phone.
Parking Lot Killer: That is who was calling. They are coming for the bears.
Requel: And just like that the requel begins production.
Old Computer Game: Now the question is, with this brand new, sexy af version of GME are we selling or are we staying? I think it’s going to be so fucking amazing we “>Stay”
Kittyman: When this all goes down, RK will return again.
How did they do it?: GME (or we?) seems stupid but apparently whoever it is really good at paperwork and the RK is so happy he’s doing backflips.
What do they need to do it?: They are going to need all of us and the target is up. HODL.
Kingsman: Shorties will then be locked in the room with us and they are going to come in fierce numbers.
The Town: They need our help we can’t ask questions but we have some sick ass rides to get there with.
Morning Affirmation Cat: Help me with this one. I’m tired.
Troy: Sick ass scene. GME just needs to land the killshot.
Pikey Reaction: They pulled the price back so far that it’s a loaded spring and when the shots are fired, it’s going to be raining money. Now “come hang so we go out with a bang”. Does he have your attention now?
Stop Fighting: NOW we can stop fighting.
Pirates of the Carrabin: The Pirate comes back from the dead (NFT Market Place?) and GME presses the red button to go into hyperdrive. This solidified my theory.
Tombstone: It’s not for revenge. It’s for something bigger. It’s a reckoning. Maybe a Glass Castle?
Standoff: Now that the red button was pressed, we have all the shorties in a stand off. But it doesn’t matter because the result of the red button is going to destroy it all? DO I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION NOW?
Avenger Initiative: We have to do it together. It’s not just one person.
Sherlok Holmes: When GME says run, RUN! And remember what it’s running for. You monther, father, children, sisters, and brothers. The DOG DAYS are over.
Drive: We think were all good here right? It’s all over. Guess again. We are going to have every governmental agency coming after us and our gains. We are going to be on the run.
Bloody Blade: Help me with this one.
But First: The overture. This will be how it starts. We must go backward to unlock the secret. Once we do, the dragon wakes up and it’s game on for the game of thrones. We are going to break the wheel.
Still Here: It’s done when we say it’s done. This tweet closes with the song from the whole days evil cept being blown up with green fire. Sick.
Thanos: This was the actual first tweet just like the ET was the actual last tweet. He has read all the tea leaves and doesn't think anyone has put it together like he has so he is sharing his interoperation of the DD, the market conditions, and the news and is going to do one last DD himself.
Hope you were sitting up in your red chair and paying attention.
Apologies for any typos and poor formatting. I've never made a post like this and I'm too tired to figure all of that out. I'll come back tomorrow and clean it all up with that and fill any gaps you guys help me out with.

Hey there, I am a dog handler who took some time off to consider my poor mental health. At 4:50PM I was given notice that I was invited for a Performance Improvement Plan next week and will be reviewed Monday and Tuesday with the possibility of the problems raised changing before Wednesday (when the meeting is set).
The problems laid out in the proposal are extremely vague and to do with general dog control and a hoarding mentality (focusing too much on the dogs under my direct care instead of the ones under the care of other coworkers). I wasn't aware these were areas that I was failing in. Nowhere is there any mention of specific instances.
The business owner is the one carrying out this process, they are not on site day-to-day (maybe once every couple of months). I didn't know my day-to-day manager had these issues with my performance. Though I know the dogs aren't always obedient and in the employee documentation is explained that dogs should listen to a multitude of commands and never disobey, I feel as if this is unrealistic. I look after 10-16 different dogs each day (I pick and drop them off), as well as the 20-30 other dogs (and 2 people doing the same job I am). Some dogs come consistently 2-3 times a week, others are once a week or every other week. I am trained as a dog trainer and my role is a "handler".
I realize that I am more nervous around the owner, there has been a lot of problem with dogs being too noisy (a specific person/s relating to a nearby retirement home complained to the point of the council coming in and monitoring us, we passed an official inspection but it's become a hot-button issue). The owner expects the dogs to not bark at all which the manager and my coworkers don't even attempt when the owner is not around as it's not feasible (the manager cannot stand up for us though).
Another problem that is laid out is the lack of me being an "Alpha". I'm not sure how well versed you are with contemporary dog training so I apologize, but being an Alpha is widely considered an outdated way of treating dogs based on incorrect beliefs about packs of wolves(as well as incorrect understanding of what "dominance" means when it comes to dogs). As wikipedia mentions all professional dogs are considered to use positive reinforcement, it's what the best practices of the MPI for dog handling recommends, the SPCA and the Association for Dog Professional Trainers of New Zealand (PIP mentions that dog treats cannot be used, which is the most popular accepted form of behavioral management).
My owner has no certifications that I know of, and occasionally hires a "dog sage" (has no certifications, possibly worked as a vet nurse, or at least around them at one point) and they both consider being an Alpha as okay (and enjoy "dominating" dogs). They They have both encouraged me to physically hurt the animals to get them to "submit" this includes pinching ears, squeezing paws to the point of it being "uncomfortable" for the dogs, as well as kneeing dogs when they jump up.
I assume this is a point of contention as their public documents emphasizes that they are not trainers (nor anybody that works here) and that no physical discipline techniques will be used with handling. However are internal employee documents list the methods I mentioned before, and I have been encouraged to do this to train the dogs. (There is a mention in the employee documents that mention a handler can use the methods they think is best, which, along with my manager agreeing with my methods is probably why I've managed to work here for a couple of years). I've mentioned my discomfort at these techniques but it is seen as cowardice or over-empathy instead of what I was learned to do during my course certification and have read about since.
I've been nervous around my boss ever since the first meeting when they visited me and repeatability shouted at me to raise my voice at a dog (even though the internal documents say that a raised voice should not be used). They sent an email to everybody later on saying sorry for being harsh as they were experiencing family problems.
All the public facing documents talk about encouraging dogs to be social and have fun and grow with them but I'm constantly pressured to keep them quiet, most toys were removed to lower their excitability and I just feel like I'm a prison guard. I mentioned poor mental health and I am looking into getting a GP and treated for a worsened anxious/depressive state (wanted to with my time off but this whole thing was a big surprise, I realize PIP is meant to be helpful but a lot of online say I'm about to be fired which is pretty scary).
I have a good relationship with my day-to-day manager but I'm not sure they'll stand up for me.
My questions are:

• Can I ask for the PIP parts to be more specific? I mean how is "knowing dog behavior" and "being an alpha" supposed to be defended? There were no specific instances where I have failed anything mentioned in the any of these documents. I realise a PIP should be more exact but how realistic is that, aren't a lot of job responsibilities vague?
  
• If the problems laid out are just from my owners sparse observations, is that okay?
  
• Part of the training suggested is with the owner to improve my ability to control dogs, I don't think I'll feel comfortable around them enough to improve. and I know I definitely won't agree with some of their techniques, can I ask for them to pay for an accredited trainer? (as well as only they're only suggesting having a day of training with them every 2 weeks, then being reviewed after a 6 weeks).
  
• Should I bring up my concerns about the problems they've laid out before the meeting?
  
• Can the concerns be valid against me if they involve problems that other employees are going through? (like keeping them quiet).
  
• If this situation doesn't go well I'm quite worried about what I'll do, I understand WINZ standown is 13 weeks for quitting or being dismissed. Can this be reduced for my situation? I don't have any savings to last weeks without a wage. I hope I've misjudged the situation and I will get a "good" PIP, I'm just really worried right now.
  

I apologise for the length of my post, feel free to ask any questions.

I went through a really traumatic event at the end of last year and prior I got referred to EMDR althought the waiting list is really long, I've realised I have PTSD and from analysing my behaviours and past C-PTSD seems very likely.
Whilst in trapped in this traumatic situation I got into a relationship with someone in my friend group but I knew her for only a short period. It was a really good period and they helped me a lot with the initial processing of my trauma. She was a really good person however I think she had her own issues and my codependency and her future plans didn't align with god knows what I wanted to do. We broke up at the end of March and I was devastated.
I was then processing this whilst the traumatic incident. We had the same friend group and one of them I realise now because they have a fulltime job, live around the corner from my ex and were best friends longer that we were, always met up with my ex. But at the time I didn't see as rationally like I do now. They never got into contact with me first or invited me to things but I guess that's a friend group with a breakup in the middle. I heard incidents of my ex sleeping with people almost every weekend after the breakup which hurt to my core cause she said she didnt think about sex much when we were together. I guess I kind of felt like everything was a lie? But we weren't together anymore so whilst my hurt was valid it's not like it was any of my business so it was just what it was and hurt.
I got invited to one thing because I'd pushed to try hang out with my friend who's hers too. Whilst I was asleep on the couch at hers, she brought someone in and slept with them and I was awake. This hurt to my core.
I ended up speaking up about it and had a talk about it. I was really upset over it still but it was what it was. I don't think I had processed it properly at this point and still had hurt.
After this they all hung out and I would see this but not be invited to any of them. I felt completetly abandoned by them both, especially with them knowing the trauma I had encountered and initially being there for me, I think I had a traumatic bond with them as a new support system. And it felt like my whole world was crumbling away.
I created my final Uni project about my trauma processing, and posted online about it as it was a film I made and a screening. I saw this as a celebration of how far I'd come because I initally was on the verge of dropping out at the start of the year with everything, but I perservered. Our mutual friend didn't reply to any of these and it really hurt because I saw the film as a celebration and liberation from this trauma. I felt thrown away and forgotten about. I was fighting suicidal thoughts everyday and my mental health was not there at all. My ex had actually replied saying yes, but I wasn't sure how I felt about this because of all the old stuff with hearing them sleep with people.
I then met some other friends. I had all this hurt inside me but decided not to talk about it. Until one of them asked me what had happened between me and my ex. I explained everything from my perspective and my devastation about how abandoned I felt after this trauma. I feel bad because I should have kept some things like the sex life private but I was unloading so much hurt, I had no support system and looked at these guys thinking "yes these friends can be my new people, I can explain this and get their opinion cause I don't know what to do about the film thing". She got into my head saying my ex had lied about one of the things not being consensual and I got really in my head about this and upset because I thought "she might have lied about that to my face after knowing everything I had went through",
I ended up holding the film thing and neither my ex or friend came, I cried all morning of this. Then the people I talked about the devastation with who said they'd come, didn't show up either. They had gone to a house party to drink instead. Hurting more to the core. I spent time with myself after this focusing on my work and realised how bad these abandonment soul wounds had warped into this feeling of utter abandonment when maybe at the time I should have reached out to my inital friend group. I journalled about CPTSD and realised a lot of past things that contributed to the intense emotions I felt.
Then it comes to the friend who was friends with my ex's birthday. I decided to get them some gifts and gave them to them as I didn't want to ruin a connection that helped me so much at the start of the year. It was a nice chat and I realised everything had been in my head and I should have reached out to this initial support system whilst I was undergoing these abandonment thoughts.
They held celebrations and I didn't get invited to any of them because they said they had anxiety of something happened (probably because I had spoke up about the sleeping with someone whilst I was in the house) but the person who didn't show up to the film to drink attended.
I'm pretty sure they talked about me and my ramble and expression of all this hurt but it was warped in a way that made me just look like I was chatting shit rather than suffering with abandonment wounds and hurt by feeling like they didn't care for me at all now I was irrelvant to my ex.
Ever since they've been off with me, I sent a message to our group chat to say I was anxious about anything being tarnished post the breakup because of all the emotions I was facing. I am off their close friends list and messages ignored. I think they hate me. Which hurts so much because I kind of just brought to reality what I had already felt without realising. I feel exhiled and I feel really empty. I've faced so much loss for so long and helpless. I've been completely alone with no proper support system. I feel really horrible because I never have any malice. I loved everyone so deeply and this hurt me and my soul wounds.
I don't know what to do, I'm trying my hard to get on with my life and focus on myself, but I wake up feeling dread and empty everyday - only staying alive for my family. I'm trying to create a better life for myself and have gotten myself out of the house, reading, a new job, making art but my soul feels so torn up. I am trying to get therapy but I went in very suicidal last week and got told the typical things like take a bath, have a tea etc. The EMDR is 2yrs and I can't afford private therapy at the minute.
I guess posting on here I just want someone to hear my story and thoughts and offer any guidance or support, because I don't know what to do anymore. I'm really hurt to my core.
Thank you for reading my story.

Measures, as deterministic and effective as possible, to re-peg DUSD and re-collateralize the dToken system with healthy loans sold against crypto, without permanent expropriation

TL;DR

This proposal offers a structured and maximally deterministic approach to stabilize DUSD immediately and consistently, aims to reward long-term supporters, and to enable projects in the long run. It does not rely on influencing market behavior and does not indefinitely expropriate holders. The primary goal of this approach is to re-collateralize the dToken system with healthy loans sold against crypto, the backbone of our dToken system, everything else builds on top. It involves locking nearly all circulating DUSD and dTokens in tranches and releasing them successively based on predefined conditions.

Goals

• Achieve the peg as deterministically and effectively as possible.
• Enable fair market price leverage trades on crypto, which is necessary for re-collateralizing the system.
• Repay those who supported the system.
• Enable projects to execute their mission and work with real liquidity.

Problem Statement

Current measures to stabilize DUSD rely heavily on influencing market participants' behavior, making the peg too probabilistic. Even if we reach the peg, the assumption that enough collateralized loans are sold against crypto for the dynamic interest rates to maintain this peg is too probabilistic. Relying on assumptions for a peg is problematic, because market participant behavior cannot be controlled and predicted, even if incentivized. While I believe dynamic interest rates can consistently maintain a peg effectively once we reach healthy collateralization levels, the implemented fees are not an effective tool to overcome the massive liquidity of algo dTokens and DUSD circulating today.

Proposed Solution

A new approach: instead of relying on voluntary actions of market participants, force-lock-up all DUSD and dToken liquidity, whilst providing opportunities and clear rules for paybacks based on system health.

1. Locking all liquidity away and releasing it successively as needed

• The defined percentage* of DUSD are locked/removed from each owning addresses and are in equal parts allocated in 50 tranches (1-50). Those are freed/returned to the owning addresses based on predefined factors.
• The defined percentage* of dTokens and relevant LP tokens are locked/removed from each owning addresses and are in equal parts allocated in 50 tranches (51-100). Those are freed/returned to the owning addresses based on predefined factors.
• Locked LP tokens do not receive rewards, they are used to reward new liquidity providers. Exiting at peg is reward enough for those currently invested, no need to make it more expensive.
• As liquidity is then minimal, ongoing measures will buy the DUSD up immediately and incentivize the creation of backed DUSD loans sold against crypto. Those are the backbone of the peg, they are the priority of the proposed measures. All other decisions are secondary and all rely on reaching this.

2. Releasing Tranches

• Tranches with the same number are released together, this means all DUSD tranches are released first, all dToken and LP tranches are released later.
• The following system health conditions for releasing tranches are checked on oracle blocks to avoid high computational load:

One tranche at a time: - DFI market cap 2 times than dToken System market cap - An algo ratio below 30% - Consistent 1% DUSD premium over the period between two futureswap blocks.
Two tranches at a time: - DFI market cap 4 times greater than dToken System market cap - An algo ratio below 25% - Consistent 5% DUSD premium over the period between two futureswap blocks.
Three tranches at a time: - DFI market cap 6 times greater than dToken System market cap - An algo ratio below 20% - Consistent 10% DUSD premium over the period between two futureswap blocks.
Four tranches at a time: - DFI market cap 8 times greater than dToken System market cap - An algo ratio below 15% - Consistent 15% DUSD premium over the period between two futureswap blocks.
Five tranches at a time: - DFI market cap 10 times greater than dToken System market cap - An algo ratio below 10% - Consistent 20% DUSD premium over the period between two futureswap blocks.
This way, 2-10 million DUSD worth of dToken-system liquidity can be reintroduced into the system per week, given a healthy system state.

3. Measures to be Eliminated

• All additional pool swap fees are lifted, allowing for healthy leverage trades on DFI that can later support the DUSD peg. This part is crucial for a healthy restart. A collateralization ratio makes no difference if the DUSD are not sold against DFI as those need to be bought back when the dynamic interest rises due to a discount to support a peg.
• Reward allocations to DUSD bonds are removed; those will be redirected to the community fund until we find a better use for them. All existing DUSD bonds are released, and the freed-up DUSD are counted to the DUSD that may be locked in the tranches together with all other DUSD.
• All negative interest mechanisms are lifted. DUSD loops are unwound, and the freed-up DUSD are counted to the DUSD that may be locked in the tranches together with all other DUSD.

4. Measures to be Retained

• The futureswap mechanism will be retained. It is advised to analyze the futureswap behavior while we are at peg over an extended period. If the futureswap creates unnecessarily high amounts of algo tokens even when at peg, the following adjustment is suggested: making the futureswap spread variable and increasing it if an asset shows higher implied volatility over two consecutive futureswap blocks. This way, the chain gains a bigger trade advantage for stocks that tend to surpass the current 5% limit more often. This will burn more tokens and mint less.
• The buy and burn bot will be retained.
• The rebalancing of the community fund will be retained.
• Dynamic interests will be retained.

5. Introduction of a New dToken System-Wide Fee That Consistently Burns DUSD and dTokens

• A dToken-system-base-fee is implemented on DVM and DMC. This fee applies to all dToken and DUSD transfers from account to account and pool swaps on the DVM side and all token transactions on the DMC side. The fee is initially set to 10 basis points (0.1%). This fee is necessary to account for rising stock prices and reduce the algo ratio.

Percentage Locked

The percentage of liquidity to be locked is crucial as this is a one-time approach. Locking too much liquidity is not problematic, as it can be reintroduced if system health allows. However, locking too little is problematic because maintaining the peg and enabling re-collateralization through backed loans sold against crypto will not be possible. I argue for minimal liquidity leading to a peg allowing for healthy collateralization to support the peg via dynamic interest rates rather than excessive liquidity that the system cannot support. Therefore, I propose locking away 90% of all dToken-system liquidity, leaving about 20 million DUSD in liquidity for the restart. If the system is healthy, up to 10 million DUSD in liquidity can be reintroduced per week. If not, we will wait until the system is healthy enough to support the liquidity.

Further Details

• Loans are all paid back before the dTokens and DUSD are locked in tranches. If insufficient assets are available on the address, they are purchased on the market via the cheapest route.
• Relevant pools are emptied before the dTokens and DUSD are locked in tranches. Trading counterparts are credited to the owning addresses.

Requirements

A hard fork will be necessary to implement these changes. Furthermore, cooperation is needed from relevant projects to handle the balances in smart contracts on the DMC. If they do not cooperate, this proposal cannot be implemented. Addressing smart contracts on the metachain is crucial to treat everyone fairly and ensure the success of the proposed measures.

Measure Until Implementation and Proposal Kill Switch

The implementation of the proposed measures is challenging and time-consuming, it will probably take months. Until implementation, we implement a 50 basis points fee on all dToken pools to burn algo tokens, in hope to be able to activate the following proposal kill switch: If, during implementation, DUSD consistently trades around $1, this proposal is not to be implemented.

Further Food for Thought

Measures targeted at changing voluntary market behavior have had insufficient success, forced locking with conditional payouts ensures fairness and effectiveness. Measures based on voluntary lockups are unfair because those who do not participate unjustly gain a bigger advantage, despite the cash flow offered as recompensation to those who support the system. Additionally, cash flows are costly to the system, either the dToken system or DFI itself. No solution will make everyone happy. However, a deterministic forced approach treats everyone fairly and equally, does not rely on probabilities and ensures success.

Optional

I would argue for future swapping all dTokens at the oracle price to DUSD, making the locking and releasing much easier. Additionally, the upside from here is 10x after fee on a repeg. Assets being worth times 10 should be enough to compensate the owners for the forced sale of their preferred dTokens. If not, we must release DUSD before dTokens, as dTokens might rise in value and the greater liquidity they provide would mean a slower payout for everybody, which is not fair to the people holding DUSD instead of dTokens.

Q&A

Q: If we have little liquidity, users will be angry that the system cannot be used. A: Liquidity is a secondary issue for me, the more important question is if we can afford the liquidity. The liquidity we have in the system right now is a cost that, if we can't afford, should not be maintained. If we can afford it, the liquidity will be reintroduced; we have it on the backburner. Additionally, the goal is to attract real liquidity through backed loans, which we will achieve if the product is valuable.
Q: If we have a 10 bps fee on all transactions, there will be less usage. A: I also pay 10 bps on every exchange, usually much more, especially in traditional finance. I pay 2% on every card payment and substantial fees on asset management. For example, at Relai, you pay at least 50 basis points, usually 1%. Fees are charged everywhere; things cost money. I believe a usage fee on RWA is justifiable. RWAs rise in price, so even if the futureswap burns more dTokens than it mints, it may create algo DUSD balances. We have many algo tokens. This fee is a necessary cost that users must pay for an effective synthetic RWA spot system.
Q: Why include the fee system-wide on all transactions? A: New users will probably use the DMC. If DFC is successful, we will likely find most usage there. We want many projects using our dTokens. We need to charge the usage fee where the usage will occur; otherwise, users will flee to DMC where no fees are charged.
Q: But we have the stabilization fee. Can’t we just keep that instead of the base fee on all transactions? A: The stabilization fee makes healthy re-collateralization (sold against crypto) more challenging when the algo ratio is high because the user gets less crypto for his DUSD. When we have high algo ratios, we want more collateralization-based loans sold against crypto. It is the "collateralized loans sold against crypto" that maintain the peg if dynamic interests are raised. A loan left in the dToken system brings a low algo ratio but does nothing if I pay back a loan without buying the DUSD beforehand. Dynamic interest rates stabilize nothing in this case. By first eliminating most algo tokens and implementing a base fee, we can remove this fee and allow for healthy leverage trades supporting the system to occur in the first place.
Q: Why lock so much liquidity? A: This approach is a one-time silver bullet. It must be as deterministic as possible; I do not want to rely on probabilistic assumptions about how market participants will behave based on incentives and public information. In the past, single addresses hindered re-peg efforts, and we cannot predict which addresses will act against the peg efforts in the future. Therefore, we must lock substantial portions of everyone's liquidity. Liquidity is the cost in our current situation, and we aren’t at the peg because none of the measures or whales can afford it. If the chain were a person, it would be flat broke. We cannot afford the liquidity at this point. Let's gradually ramp up the expenses when and if we can afford it, but not before.

I hesitate to post this because I've been on reddit for years and know ya'll can be vultures but here it goes:
TL;DR - Fiancé and I are confused and exhausted. We're currently a dead bedroom, it's my doing. He needs more physical intimacy and for some reason I can't provide it. He has cheated, only since physical intimacy stopped, although he does not agree it is cheating. He knows he has hurt me. Blah blah blah, wedding is postponed, we've discussed an open relationship and/or taking a break.
Background:
We have been together for 10 years, engaged 2. We're in our early 30s. Wedding is planned for next year. No kids, but 3 dogs together.
The beginning of our relationship was like any new relationship. We were young, the honeymoon phase seemed never-ending as we didn't see each other often, and sex was new and exciting.
2 years into dating, I started birth control. Immediately, we didn't notice many sexual side effects, but looking back, there probably were. We had both been taking antidepressants/ anti-anxiety medication before we met, and we both currently still take those medications. We know these have sexual side effects, for both of us.
After dating a few years we moved in together and shortly after, sex became infrequent. About 3 years into living together he brought up concerns about lack of sex and physical intimacy. I eventually realized I got comfortable and content, and didn't prioritize sex and physical intimacy as I should have been. I promised I would change, but I unfortunately didn't. Around this time, he sent a nude photo of himself to a friend of mine. I couldn't believe it, he told me a few days later, and promised to never do anything like that or to hurt me like that again.
Fast forward to now, we own a house together, and still unfortunately, I have done little to nothing to increase my sex drive and physical intimacy. I start little things but no progress is made. For example I say I'm going to plan a "sexy time" but it just doesn't happen. I did surprise him with a photo album of sexy polaroids of myself, which he enjoyed. But maybe a year later he asked a different friend of mine for sexy photos. I think he's just missing that attention that I should be giving him. His love language is physical touch, mine is acts of service and gift giving, and I struggle to show him love in the way he wants to be shown (physically.)
Since our engagement, the past year has been filled with discussions about our dead bedroom: why it happened, can we fix it, etc. For both of us, it's been almost impossible to be excited about being engaged or planning a wedding or getting married because of this issue. We've agreed that we don't want to get married if we're not excited, so we're postponing the wedding. Also, we both see a therapist and have started couples therapy.
Where it gets complicated:
He recently told me that last year, he visited a club a few times. Only on one occasion it got physical: he received a handjob, (I do believe him because at this point there's nothing to hide.) This handjob visit occurred 6 months after he proposed. Leading up to these club visits (which remember, I didn't know about until recently) he would urge me in a healthy way to be intimate, communicate his needs, and so on. But for whatever my multitude of reasons are that I'm working out in therapy (vaginismus, piled on stress, self-esteem issues, maybe not being attracted or turned on by my partner, low libido, possible imbalanced hormones, health scares that may have caused trauma) I just couldn't do it. Of course I regret it, I don't know what's wrong with me and I wish I could snap my fingers and fix it. So I do understand why he went to that club.
We truly do not know what to do. We love each other. We've been through so much, helped each other through a lifetime of stressful events, and experienced such great things together. We've talked about our future together for the past decade. But we also recognize that time spent together does not mean you should or are obligated to stay together. We recognize that right now, neither of us are happy and something needs to change.
We've briefly mentioned opening our relationship, taking a break, or both. But we don't know what that entails. Since we live together and the dogs are like our children, we don't know how a break would logistically work. As for opening our relationship, considering the infidelity, I just don't know. But at the same time, there is no sex or intimacy happening and I want to see him happy in that way. I feel like it would improve his mental health. Our therapist has been focusing more on us rather than discussing those options at the moment.
Of course there is so much more to a decade-long relationship, and I'm trying to be as neutral as possible when writing this. But we just feel like we're in this best friend, roommate, sometimes cuddle limbo and are avoiding truly discussing it because we know the options...we just don't. know. what. to. do. So if anyone has any actual advice, similar stories, or experiences with an open relationship or taking a break (while engaged) please share.
Also if you're going to respond with something unnecessary or unhelpful like "just break up" we'll save you the time and say thank you, we've discussed that option as well.

I’ve always hated the smell of gun oil. It clings to everything it touches, soaking deep into the fibers of my clothes, the lining of my backpack, the coarse hair on the back of my hands. Yet here I am, kneeling on the cracked linoleum of our mudroom, a Remington .308 laid across my thighs, and the stench of gun oil sharp in my nostrils. The early morning light barely scratches at the edges of the blinds, dim and gray like the belly of a dead fish.
My dad Frank is in the kitchen, clattering around with the coffeepot and mumbling under his breath. Today we’re heading up to the woods of Northern Michigan, same as we did every year before Leah… before we lost her.
I can’t help but feel the old scars throbbing as I load bullets into the magazine. It’s been ten years since that hunting trip, the one that tore my family into before and after. Before, when Leah's laughter was a constant soundtrack to our lives; after, when every silence was filled with her absence.
We were just kids back then. I was ten, Leah was eight. It was supposed to be a typical hunting trip, one of those bonding experiences Dad was always talking about. But things went wrong. We got separated from Dad somehow. One minute we were following him, the next we were lost, the dense woods closing in around us.
Dad says when he found me, I was huddled under a fallen tree, my eyes wide, my body frozen. All I could mutter through chattering teeth was "Dogman."
It was only later, after the search parties had combed through every thicket and hollow, that they found her. What remained of Leah was barely recognizable, the evidence of a brutal mauling undeniable. The authorities concluded it was likely a bear attack, but Dad... he never accepted that explanation. He had seen the tracks, too large and oddly shaped for any bear.
As I load another round, the memory flashes, unbidden and unwelcome. Large, hairy clawed hands reaching out towards us, impossibly big, grotesque in their form. Yet, the rest of the creature eludes me, a shadow just beyond the edge of my recall, leaving me with nothing but fragmented terrors and Leah’s haunting, echoing screams. My mind blocked most of it out, a self-defense mechanism, I guess.
For years after that day, sleep was a battleground. I'd wake up in strange places—kitchen floor, backyard, even at the edge of the nearby creek. My therapist said it was my mind's way of trying to resolve the unresolved, to wander back through the woods searching for Leah. But all I found in those sleepless nights was a deeper sense of loss.
It took time, a lot of therapy, and patience I didn't know I had, but the sleepwalking did eventually stop. I guess I started to find some semblance of peace.
I have mostly moved on with my life. The fragmentary memories of that day are still there, lurking in the corners of my mind, but they don’t dominate my thoughts like they used to. I just finished my sophomore year at Michigan State, majoring in Environmental Science.
As for Dad, the loss of Leah broke him. He became a shell of himself. It destroyed his marriage with Mom. He blamed himself for letting us out of his sight, for not protecting Leah. His life took on a single, consuming focus: finding the creature that killed her. He read every book, every article on cryptids and unexplained phenomena. He mapped sightings, connected dots across blurry photos and shaky testimonies of the Dogman.
But as the tenth anniversary of Leah’s death approaches, Dad's obsession has grown more intense. He’s started staying up late, poring over his maps and notes, muttering to himself about patterns and cycles. He’s convinced that the dogman reappears every ten years, and this is our window of opportunity to finally hunt it down.
I’m not nearly as convinced. The whole dogman thing seems like a coping mechanism, a way for Dad to channel his guilt and grief into something tangible, something he can fight against. But I decided to tag along on this trip, partly to keep an eye on him, partly because a small part of me hopes that maybe, just maybe, we’ll find some kind of closure out there in the woods.
I finish loading the rifle and set it aside, standing up to stretch my legs. I wipe my greasy hands on an old rag, trying to get rid of the smell. The early morning light is starting to seep into the room, casting long shadows across the floor.
Dad comes out of the kitchen with two thermoses of coffee in hand. His eyes are bleary and tired.
“You ready, Ryan?” he asks, handing me a thermos, his voice rough from too many sleepless nights.
“Yeah, I’m ready,” I reply, trying to sound more confident than I felt.
We load our gear into the truck, the weight of our supplies and weapons a physical reminder of the burden we carry. The drive from Lansing across the Lower Peninsula is long and quiet, the silence between us filled with unspoken memories and unresolved grief.
—
The drive north is a blur of highway lines and the dull hum of the engine. I drift off, the landscape outside blending into a haze. In my sleep, fragments of that day with Leah replay like scattered pieces of a puzzle. I see her smile, the way she tugged at my sleeve, eager to explore. The sunlight filters through the trees in sharp, jagged streaks.
Then, the memory shifts—darker, disjointed. Leah's voice echoes, a playful laugh turning into a scream that pierces the air. The crunch of leaves underfoot as something heavy moves through the underbrush. I see a shadow, large and looming, not quite fitting the shapes of any creature I know.
Then, something darker creeps into the dream, something I’ve never allowed myself to remember clearly.
Before I can see what it is I wake up with a start as the truck jerks slightly on a rough patch of road. Dad glances over. "Bad dream?" he asks. I nod, rubbing the sleep from my eyes, the remnants of the dream clinging to me like the cold.
"Yeah, just... thinking about Leah," I manage to say.
As we drive, Dad attempts to bridge the silence with small talk. He asks about my finals, my plans for the summer, anything to keep the conversation going. His voice carries a forced cheerfulness, but it’s clear his heart isn’t in it. I respond when necessary, my answers brief, my gaze fixed on the passing scenery.
The landscape changes as we head further north, from flat expanses to rolling hills dotted with dense patches of forest. It's beautiful country, the kind that reminds you how vast and wild Michigan can be, but today it just feels oppressive, like it’s closing in on us.
—
We finally arrive at the cabin, nestled deep in the woods, its weathered wood blending seamlessly with the surrounding trees. The place hasn't changed much since the last time I was here—a relic from another time, filled with the echoes of our past. I can still see Leah running around the porch, her laughter ringing out into the forest.
Dad parks the truck, and we step out into the crisp air. The smell of pine and damp earth fills my nostrils. We start unloading our gear, the tension between us palpable.
“Let’s get this inside,” Dad says, his voice gruff as he hefts a duffel bag onto his shoulder.
I nod, grabbing my own bag and following him to the cabin. Inside, it’s a mix of old and new—the same rustic furniture, but with new hunting gear and maps strewn across the table. Dad’s obsession is evident in every corner of the room, a constant reminder of why we’re here.
As we unpack, we exchange strained attempts at normalcy. He talks about the latest cryptid sightings he’s read about, his eyes lighting up with a fervor that both worries and saddens me.
“Did you hear about the sighting up near Alpena?” he asks, laying out his maps on the table.
“Yeah, you mentioned it,” I reply, trying to muster some enthusiasm. “Do you really think there’s something to it?”
Dad’s eyes meet mine, and for a moment, I see a flicker of doubt. But it’s quickly replaced by grim determination. “I have to believe it, Ryan. It’s the only thing that makes sense.”
We finish unpacking, the silence between us growing heavier with each passing minute. I step outside to clear my head, the cool air a welcome relief. The sun is starting to set, casting long shadows across the clearing. I can’t shake the feeling of unease.
"You can take the upstairs room," Dad mutters. His voice is strained, trying to sound normal, but it's clear the weight of the past is heavy on him. I nod, hauling my backpack up the creaking stairs to the small bedroom that I used to share with Leah. The room feels smaller now, or maybe I've just grown too much since those innocent days.
I unpack silently, setting my things aside. The bed is stiff and cold under my touch. As I settle in, I can't help but glance at the corner where Leah and I would huddle together, whispering secrets and making plans for adventures that would never happen. I push the thoughts away, focusing on the practicalities of unpacking.
After settling in, I go back downstairs to find Dad loading up a backpack with supplies for our hunt. The intensity in his eyes is palpable, his hands moving with practiced precision. I know this routine; it's one he's perfected over countless solo trips since that fateful day.
"We'll head out early," he says, not looking up from his task. "Gotta make the most of the daylight."
I nod, though unease curls in my stomach. I'm not just worried about what we might find—or not find—out there. I'm worried about him. Each year, the obsession seems to carve him out a bit more, leaving less of the Dad I knew.
—
The morning air is sharp with the scent of pine and wet earth as Dad and I head into the deeper parts of the forest. The terrain is rugged, familiar in its untamed beauty, but there’s a tension between us that makes the landscape feel alien. Dad moves with a purposeful stride, his eyes scanning the woods around us. Every snap of a twig, every rustle in the underbrush seems to draw his attention. He’s on edge, and it puts me on edge too.
As we walk, my mind drifts back to that day ten years ago. I can almost hear Leah’s voice echoing through the trees, her high-pitched call as she darted ahead, "Catch me, Ryan!" I remember how the sunlight filtered through the leaves, casting dancing shadows on the ground. Those memories are so vivid, so tangible, it feels like I could just turn a corner and see her there, waiting for us.
Dad suddenly stops and kneels, examining the ground. He points out a set of tracks that are too large for a deer, with an unusual gait pattern. "It’s been here, Ry. I’m telling you, it’s close," he whispers, a mixture of excitement and something darker in his voice. I nod, though I’m not sure what to believe. Part of me wants to dismiss it all as grief-fueled obsession, but another part, the part that heard Leah's scream and saw something monstrous in the woods that day, isn’t so sure.
As we continue, Dad's comments become increasingly cryptic. "You know, they say the dogman moves in cycles, drawn to certain places, certain times. Like it’s tied to the land itself," he muses, more to himself than to me. His fixation on the creature has always been intense, but now it borders on mania.
We set up a makeshift blind near a clearing where Dad insists the creature will pass. Hours drag by with little to see but the occasional bird or distant deer.
The sun rises higher in the sky, casting long, slender shadows through the dense canopy. I shift uncomfortably in my spot, the forest floor hard and unyielding beneath me. My eyes dart between the trees, hoping to catch a glimpse of something, anything, to break the monotony. Dad, on the other hand, remains steadfast, his gaze fixed on the treeline as if he can will the dogman into existence by sheer force of will.
A bird chirps nearby, startling me. I sigh and adjust my grip on the rifle. I glance over at Dad.
“Anything?” I ask, more out of boredom than genuine curiosity.
“Not yet,” he replies, his voice tight. “But it’s out there. I know it.”
I nod, even though I’m not sure I believe him. The forest seems too quiet, too still. Maybe we’re chasing ghosts.
As the sun begins its descent, the forest is bathed in a warm, golden light. The air cools, and a breeze rustles the leaves. I shiver, more from anticipation than the cold. The long hours of sitting and waiting are starting to wear on me.
“Let’s call it a day for now,” Dad says finally, his voice heavy with disappointment. “We’ll head back to the cabin, get some rest, and try again tomorrow.”
I stand and stretch, feeling the stiffness in my muscles. We pack up our gear in silence and start the trek back to the cabin. The walk is long and quiet, the only sounds are the crunch of leaves underfoot and the distant calls of birds settling in for the night.
—
Dinner is a quiet affair, both of us lost in our thoughts. I try to make small talk, asking Dad about his plans for tomorrow, but it feels forced. We clean up in silence.
After dinner, I retreat to the small bedroom. The fatigue from the day's hike has settled into my bones, but sleep still feels like a distant hope. I lie down, staring at the ceiling, the room cloaked in darkness save for the sliver of moonlight creeping through the window. Downstairs, I hear the faint sound of Dad moving around, likely unable to sleep himself.
I drift into sleep, but it's not restful. My dreams pull me back to that fateful day in the woods. Leah's voice is clear and vibrant, her laughter echoing through the trees. She looks just as she did then—bright-eyed and full of life, her blonde hair catching the sunlight as she runs ahead of me.
"Come on, Ry! You can't catch me!" she taunts, her voice playful and teasing.
I chase after her, but the scene shifts abruptly. The sky darkens, the woods around us growing dense and foreboding. Leah's laughter fades, replaced by a chilling silence. I see her ahead, standing still, her back to me.
"Leah?" I call out, my voice trembling. She turns slowly, her eyes wide and filled with fear. "Ryan, you have to remember," she says, her voice barely a whisper. "It wasn't what you think. You need to know the truth."
Leah’s words hang in the air, cryptic and unsettling. Before I can respond, she turns and starts running again, her figure becoming a blur among the trees. Panic rises in my chest as I sprint after her, my feet pounding against the forest floor.
“Leah, wait!” I shout, desperation lacing my voice. The forest around me seems to close in, the trees towering and twisted, shadows dancing menacingly in the dim light. I push forward, trying to keep her in sight, but she’s too fast, slipping away like a wisp of smoke.
Suddenly, there’s a rustle, a flash of movement in the corner of my vision. Leah screams, a sound that pierces through the heavy silence. It happens too quickly—I can’t see what it is, only a dark blur that snatches her up.
“Leah!” I scream, my voice breaking. I stumble, falling to my knees as the forest spins around me. My heart races, and the terror is so real, so visceral, that it pulls me back to that awful day, the one that changed everything.
I jolt awake, my breath coming in ragged gasps.
I sit up, wiping the cold sweat from my forehead as I try to steady my breathing. The room is still dark, the shadows cast by the moonlight seem to flicker and dance on the walls. My heart is still racing from the nightmare, the echo of Leah's scream lingering in my ears.
As I struggle to calm down, the floorboards outside my room creak. The door opens slowly, and I see the silhouette of my dad in the doorway, a Bowie knife in his hand, his posture tense.
“Dad, what the hell are you doing?” I whisper, my voice shaking.
“Shh,” he hisses, holding up a hand to silence me. “I heard something. Something moving around in the cabin. Stay quiet.”
I swallow hard, my mouth dry. I glance at the clock on the nightstand—it’s just past three in the morning. The cabin is silent, the kind of deep, oppressive silence that makes every small sound seem louder. I can’t hear anything out of the ordinary, but Dad’s expression is deadly serious.
He motions for me to get up, and I do, moving as quietly as I can. My heart is racing, a mix of lingering fear from the dream and the sudden, sharp anxiety of the present moment. Dad leads the way, stepping cautiously out of the bedroom and into the hallway, the knife held ready in front of him.
We move through the cabin, checking each room in turn. The living room is empty, the furniture casting long shadows in the dim moonlight. The kitchen is just as we left it, the plates from dinner still drying on the counter. Everything seems normal, untouched.
We finish our sweep of the cabin without finding anything amiss. The silence is heavy, punctuated only by our soft footfalls. I can see the tension in Dad’s frame, his grip on the knife unwavering. After checking the last room, we pause in the dimly lit hallway, the air thick with unspoken questions.
“There’s nothing here,” I say, my voice low. “Are you sure you heard something?”
He looks at me, his eyes searching for something in my face. “I heard growling. Deep and close. It was right outside the window.”
“Maybe it was just an animal outside, a raccoon or something?” I suggest, although the certainty in his voice makes me doubt my own reassurance.
“No, it wasn’t like that. It was different,” he insists, his voice tense.
I nod, not wanting to argue, but the seeds of worry are planted deep.
The look in his eyes sends a chill down my spine. It’s not just fear—it’s desperation. The kind of desperation that comes from years of chasing shadows and finding nothing. I can see the toll this hunt has taken on him, the way it’s worn him down, turned him into a man I barely recognize.
We head back to our rooms. As I lie down, my mind races with thoughts of my dad. I can’t help but wonder if he’s losing it, if the years of grief and guilt have finally pushed him over the edge.
Dad wasn’t always like this. Before Leah’s death, he was the kind of father who took us fishing, helped with homework, and told terrible jokes that made us groan and laugh at the same time. He was solid, dependable. But losing Leah changed him. The guilt twisted him into someone I barely recognize, someone driven by a need for answers, for closure, that may never come.
I try to sleep, but my thoughts keep me awake. I can hear Dad moving around downstairs, probably pacing or double-checking the locks. His paranoia has become a constant presence, and I don’t know how to help him. I don’t even know if I can help him.
—
The next morning, the sunlight filters weakly through the cabin windows, casting a pale light that does little to lift the heavy mood. I drag myself out of bed, feeling the exhaustion of another restless night. Dad is already up, hunched over his maps at the kitchen table, his eyes bloodshot from lack of sleep.
“Morning,” I mumble, rubbing the sleep from my eyes as I pour myself a cup of coffee. “Did you sleep at all?”
He shakes his head, not looking up from his notes. “Not much. I couldn’t stop thinking about what I heard last night.”
I sip my coffee, trying to shake off the remnants of my nightmare. “Maybe it was just an animal, Dad. We’re deep in the woods, after all.”
He finally looks up, his eyes intense. “Ryan, I know what I heard. It wasn’t just an animal. It was something else.”
I sigh, not wanting to argue. “Okay, fine, Dad. What’s the plan for today?”
“We’re going back out. I found some tracks yesterday, and I want to follow them. See where they lead.”
I nod, feeling a mix of apprehension and resignation. I can see how much this means to him, how desperate he is for any kind of lead. “Alright. Let’s get packed and head out.”
We spend the morning preparing, loading up our gear and double-checking our supplies. Dad is meticulous, going over everything with a fine-toothed comb. I try to match his focus, but my mind keeps drifting back to Leah and the dream I had. Her words echo in my head, cryptic and unsettling: “You need to know the truth.”
We set off into the woods, the air crisp and cool. The forest is alive with the sounds of birds and rustling leaves, but it all feels distant, like background noise to the tension between us. Dad leads the way, his eyes scanning the ground for any sign of the tracks he found yesterday.
As we walk, I can’t help but notice how erratically he’s acting. He mutters to himself, his eyes darting around as if expecting something to jump out at us. His grip on his rifle is tight, his knuckles white.
“Dad, are you okay?” I ask, trying to keep my voice steady.
He glances at me, his expression unreadable. “I’m fine. Just focused.”
He stops frequently to examine the ground or the bark of trees, pointing out marks and signs that seem meaningless to me.
“Look at this,” he says, crouching down to examine a broken branch. “See how it’s snapped? That’s not a deer or a bear. That’s something bigger. Stronger.”
I crouch next to Dad, squinting at the broken branch. To me, it just looks like a regular broken branch, the kind you see all over the forest. "I don't know, Dad. It just looks like a branch to me," I say, trying to keep my voice neutral.
Dad's eyes flicker with frustration. "You're not looking close enough. It's the way it's snapped—too clean, too deliberate. Something did this."
I nod, not wanting to argue. "Okay, sure. But even if you're right, it could be anything. A storm, another hunter..."
His expression hardens. "I know what I'm looking for. This is different."
I sigh, feeling the weight of the past and the tension between us pressing down on me. "Dad, I had a dream last night. About Leah." The words hang in the air between us, heavy and fraught with unspoken emotions.
Dad's eyes widen, and he straightens up, his entire demeanor shifting. "What kind of dream? What did you see?" His voice is urgent, almost desperate.
"It was... strange. We were in the woods, like we are now, but everything felt different. Leah was there, running ahead of me, laughing. Then she stopped and told me I needed to know the truth, that it wasn't what I thought."
Dad grabs my shoulders, his grip tight. "What else did she say? Did she tell you anything specific? Anything about the creature?"
I shake my head, feeling a chill run down my spine. "No, that was it. She just said I needed to know the truth, and then she was gone."
Dad’s grip on my shoulders tightens, and his eyes bore into mine with a mixture of desperation and hope. “Ryan, you have to try to remember. Think hard. What did the creature look like? Did you see anything else?”
I pull back slightly, uneasy with his intensity. “Dad, I told you. I don’t remember. It was just a dream. A nightmare, really. My mind’s probably just mixing things up.”
He lets go of me and runs a hand through his hair, looking frustrated and lost. “Dreams can be important. They can hold memories we’ve buried deep. Please, try to remember. This could be a sign, a clue.”
I rub my temples, feeling the beginnings of a headache. “I’ve tried, okay? I’ve tried for years to piece together what happened that day. But it’s all just fragments, like pieces of a puzzle that don’t fit. The dream… it felt real, but I don’t think it’s telling me anything new.”
Dad’s face falls, and he looks older than I’ve ever seen him. He turns away, staring into the forest as if it holds all the answers.
—
As we make our way back to the cabin, the sun begins to set, casting long shadows through the trees. The air grows colder, and I shiver, pulling my jacket tighter around me. Dad is silent, lost in his thoughts, his face drawn and haggard.
Back at the cabin, we unload our gear once again in silence. Dad disappears into his room, muttering something about going over his notes. I decide to explore the cabin, hoping to find something that might help me understand what’s going on with him.
In the attic, I find a box of old family photos and documents. As I sift through the contents, I come across a worn journal with Dad’s handwriting on the cover. Curiosity gets the better of me, and I open it, flipping through the pages.
The journal is filled with notes and sketches, detailing his obsession with the dogman. But there’s something else—entries that talk about Leah, about that day in the woods. His handwriting becomes more erratic, the words harder to read. One entry stands out, dated just a few days after Leah’s death:
“June 15, 2013 – It was supposed to be a normal trip. Keep them close, Frank, I kept telling myself. But I failed. Leah is gone, and it’s my fault. I heard her scream, saw the shadows. I tried to get to her, but… the thing, it was there. Too fast. Too strong. My hands… blood everywhere. No one will believe me. I can’t even believe myself. I have to find it. I have to protect Ryan. I have to make it right. God, what have I done?”
Before I can read further, the attic door creaks open, and Dad’s voice slices through the stillness.
“What are you doing up here?” His tone is sharp, almost panicked.
I turn to see him standing in the doorway, his face pale and his eyes wide with something between anger and fear. I clutch the journal to my chest, my mind racing. “I found this… I was just trying to understand…”
In an instant, he crosses the room and snatches the journal from my hands. His grip is tight, his knuckles white. “You had no right,” he growls, his voice trembling.
“Dad, I just wanted to know the truth!” I shout, frustration boiling over. “What really happened to Leah.”
His eyes flash with a mix of rage and anguish, and before I can react, he slaps me across the face. The force of it knocks me off balance, and I stumble backward, my cheek stinging.
For a moment, there’s a stunned silence. We both stand there, breathing hard, the air thick with tension.
“I’m sorry,” Dad says finally, his voice barely a whisper. “I didn’t mean to… I just…” He trails off, clutching the journal to his chest like a lifeline.
I touch my cheek, feeling the heat from the slap, and take a deep breath, trying to steady myself. “Dad, what aren’t you telling me? What really happened that day?”
“Stay out of it, Ryan,” Dad growls, his eyes dark with anger. “You don’t know what you’re messing with.”
He turns and storms out of the attic. I’m left standing there, my cheek throbbing, my mind racing. What the fuck is going on? What really happened to Leah? And what is Dad so afraid of?
—
That night, I sleep with my rifle within arm's reach, more afraid of my dad than any dogman. The slap still burns on my cheek, and the look in his eyes—rage, fear, something darker—haunts me. I lie awake, listening to the creaks and groans of the old cabin, every sound amplified in the stillness. Eventually, exhaustion pulls me under, and I fall into a restless sleep.
The dream returns, vivid and unsettling. I'm back in the woods, chasing after Leah. Her laughter echoes through the trees, a haunting reminder of happier times. This time, though, I push myself harder, refusing to let her slip away.
"Ryan, catch me!" she calls, her voice playful.
"I'm coming, Leah!" I shout, my legs pumping, my breath coming in ragged gasps.
The forest around us is a twisted, shadowy maze, the trees seeming to close in on us. Leah's figure becomes clearer, her blonde hair catching the dim light filtering through the canopy. She stops suddenly, turning to face me, her eyes wide with fear.
"Leah, what is it?" I ask, my voice trembling.
"Look behind you," she whispers, her voice barely audible.
I turn slowly, dread creeping up my spine. In the shadows, I see a figure, its form indistinct and shifting. It’s not quite animal, not quite human—something in between. The sight of it sends a jolt of terror through me, and I wake up with a start, my breath coming in ragged gasps.
I’m not in my bed. The ground beneath me is cold and hard, the smell of damp earth filling my nostrils. Panic rises as I realize I’ve sleepwalked into the woods. I scramble to my feet, my eyes adjusting to the dim light. The moon casts a pale glow over the surroundings, revealing what looks like a long-abandoned animal lair.
The walls are covered in giant claw marks, deep gouges in the wood and earth. The air is heavy with the scent of decay, and a chill runs through me. I can’t shake the feeling that I’m being watched.
Carefully, I start to move, my eyes scanning the ground, desperate for a familiar landmark. That's when I see them—faded scraps of fabric caught on the jagged edges of the underbrush. My steps falter, a sense of dread washing over me as I bend down to examine them. The fabric is torn, weathered by time and the elements, but unmistakably familiar. It's part of Leah's jacket—the bright pink one she wore on the day she disappeared.
As I strain to make sense of it all, a rustling sound behind me snaps my focus. My heart leaps into my throat. I spin around, my hand instinctively reaching for the rifle I don't have—because, of course, I didn't bring it in my unconscious state.
The shadowy figure that emerges from the trees is unsettlingly familiar, mirroring the menacing forms of my nightmares. But as it steps into the moonlight, I recognize the worn jacket, the weary posture. It's Dad.
"Ryan!" he calls out, his voice a mix of relief and stern concern. "I've been looking everywhere for you. What the hell are you doing out here?"
I exhale slowly, the terror ebbing away as reality sets back in. "I—I don't know, Dad. I must've sleepwalked again." My voice is shaky, my earlier dream still clinging to the edges of my consciousness.
Dad stares at me in disbelief. "You haven't sleepwalked since you were a kid, Ry. This... this isn't just a coincidence." His eyes dart around, taking in the surroundings—the eerie, claw-marked den, the unsettling quiet of the woods. "How did you even find this place?"
I shake my head, struggling to find an answer. "I don't know, Dad. I just... I woke up here." The uncertainty in my voice does nothing to ease the tension.
His eyes lock onto the tattered remains of Leah's jacket in my hands, and something inside him snaps. The color drains from his face as he stumbles a few steps backward. "This... this is where it happened," he murmurs, his voice barely a whisper. “This is where we found Leah."
“I thought you said you don’t remember anything from that night,” he says accusingly.
"I swear, Dad, I don't know anything about this place," I insist, my own heart pounding.
“It was you, wasn’t it? You’ve been hiding this from me.” His voice is frantic. “You... last night, the growling, it was you.” His voice rises, tinged with hysteria.
I step back, my pulse racing, feeling the chill of the night and the weight of his accusation. "Dad, I don't know what you're talking ab—”
"No!" he interrupts, his voice breaking as he points a trembling finger at me. "You knew, you always knew. It was you, Ryan. All these years, the evidence was right there, but I refused to see it. You were the dogman. You killed Leah!"
His words hit me like a physical blow, absurd and horrifying in their implications. "Dad, you're not making any sense. You're talking crazy! I was just a little kid! How could I–" I protest, my voice shaky.
He steps closer, his presence looming over me, the outline of his figure distorted by the shadows of the trees. "Think about it! It all makes sense now. You led us here, to this place, because you remember. Because you did it."
"Dad, stop it!" I shout, my heart pounding in my chest. "You're scaring me. You need help, professional help. This isn't you."
But he's beyond reason, his eyes wild with a haunted grief. "I have to end this," he mutters, more to himself than to me, his hand tightening around his rifle.
His finger hovers dangerously over the trigger of his rifle. My instincts kick in, and I know I have to act fast.
I lunge toward him, trying to knock the weapon away, but he's quicker than I expected. We struggle, our breaths heavy in the cold night air, the sounds of our scuffle the only noise in the otherwise silent woods. His strength surprises me, fueled by his frantic emotions. He shoves me back, and I stumble over a root, my balance lost for a crucial second. That's all he needs. He raises his rifle, his intentions clear in his wild, pained eyes.
I dive to the ground just as the shot rings out, a deafening blast that echoes ominously through the trees. The bullet whizzes past, narrowly missing me, embedding itself in the bark of an old pine. I scramble to my feet, my heart pounding in my ears, and I start running. The underbrush claws at my clothes and skin, but I push through, driven by a primal urge to survive.
"Dad, stop! It's me, Ryan!" I shout back as I dodge between the trees. Another shot breaks the silence, closer this time, sending splinters of wood flying from a nearby tree trunk. It's surreal, being hunted by my own father, a man tormented by grief and lost in his delusions.
I don't stop to look back. I can hear him crashing through the forest behind me, his heavy breaths and muttered curses carried on the wind. The terrain is rough, and I'm fueled by adrenaline, but exhaustion is setting in. I need a plan.
Ahead, I see a rocky outcrop and make a split-second decision to head for it. It offers a chance to hide, to catch my breath and maybe reason with him if he catches up. As I reach the rocks, I slip behind the largest one, my body pressed tight against the cold, damp surface. I hear his footsteps approaching, slow and cautious now.
As I press against the rock, trying to calm my racing heart, I can hear Dad's footsteps drawing closer, each step crunching ominously on the forest floor. He's methodical, deliberate, like a hunter stalking his prey.
“Come out, Ryan!” Dad’s voice is ragged, filled with a blend of fury and pain.
My heart pounds against my chest, the cold sweat on my back making me shiver against the rough surface of the rock. I know I can't just sit here; it's only a matter of time before he finds me.
Taking a deep breath, I peek around the edge of the rock, trying to gauge his position. I see him, rifle raised, scanning the area slowly. This might be my only chance to end this madness without further violence. I need to disarm him, to talk some sense into him if I can.
As quietly as I can, I move out from behind the rock, my steps careful to avoid any twigs or leaves that might betray my position. I'm almost upon him when a branch snaps under my foot—a sound so trivial yet so alarmingly loud in the quiet of the woods.
Dad whirls around, looking completely unhinged. "Ryan!" he exclaims, his rifle swinging in my direction. Panic overtakes me, and I lunge forward, my hands reaching for the gun.
We struggle, the rifle between us, our breaths heavy and erratic. "Dad, please, stop!" I plead, trying to wrestle the gun away. But he's strong, stronger than I expected.
In the chaos, the rifle goes off. The sound is deafening, a sharp echo that seems to reverberate off every tree around us. Pain explodes in my abdomen, sharp and burning, like nothing I've ever felt before. I stagger back, my hands instinctively going to the wound. The warmth of my own blood coats my fingers, stark and terrifying.
Dad drops the rifle, his eyes wide with horror. "Oh my God! What have I done?" he gasps, rushing to my side as I collapse onto the forest floor.
As the pain sears through me, a strange, overpowering energy surges within. It's wild, primal, unlike anything I've ever experienced. Looking down in horror, my hands are no longer hands but large, hairy, clawed appendages. The transformation is rapid, consuming—my vision blurs, senses heighten, and a raw, guttural growl builds in my throat.
In that moment, a flood of understanding washes over me, mingling with the horror of realization. These are the hands of the creature from my nightmares, the creature whose face I can never fully recall because, as I now understand, it is me.
What happens next feels detached, as if I'm no longer in control of my own actions, watching from a distance as my body moves on its own. I turn towards my dad, his face a mask of terror. He stumbles back, his eyes wide with the dawning realization of what his son has become.
The forest around us seems to fall silent, holding its breath as the nightmarish scene unfolds. I can hear my own growls, guttural and deep, filling the air with a sound that's both foreign and intimately familiar. The pain in my abdomen fuels a dark, violent urge, an urge that's too strong to resist.
With a ferocity that feels both alien and intrinsic, I move towards him. My dad, paralyzed by fear and shock, doesn't run. Maybe he can't. Maybe he doesn't want to.
The encounter was brutal and swift, a blur of motion and violence. My dad barely puts up a struggle, as though resigned to his fate.
Not that there is anything he can do. The creature that I’ve become is too powerful, too consumed by the wild instincts surging through me. I tear him apart, limb from bloody limb, my hands—no, my claws—rending through fabric and flesh with disgusting ease.
The sound of my dad’s screams, of tearing fabric and flesh is drowned out by the animalistic growls that echo through the trees.
When it’s all over, the red mist that had clouded my vision begins to fade, and the fierce, uncontrollable rage that drove my actions subsides. I'm left standing, my breaths heavy and erratic, in the eerie stillness of the forest. The transformation reverses as quickly as it came on, and I find myself back in my human form. My clothes are ripped to shreds, hanging off my frame in tattered remnants. At my feet lies what’s left of my dad, his body torn and unrecognizable.
I glance down at my abdomen, expecting agony, but instead find my wound miraculously healed. No sign of the gunshot remains, just a faint scar where I expected a bloody mess.
Shock sets in, a numbing disbelief mixed with a gut-wrenching realization of what I've become and what I've done. My hands, now human again, tremble as I look at them, half-expecting to see the claws that had so effortlessly ripped through flesh and bone. But there's only blood, my father's blood against my skin.
I stand there for what feels like an eternity, trapped in a nightmare of my own making.
Eventually, the shock wears thin, and a cold practicality takes hold. I need to get out of here. I need to cover my tracks, to disappear. Because who would believe this? Who would understand that I didn't choose this, that I'm not a monster by choice?
With trembling hands, I do what’s necessary. I bury my dad in a shallow grave, the physical act of digging strangely grounding. I cover him with leaves and branches, a pitiful attempt to hide the brutality of his end. I take a moment, whispering apologies into the wind, knowing full well that nothing I say can change what happened.
I leave the forest behind, my mind a whirl of dark thoughts. As I walk, the first hints of dawn brush against the horizon, the sky bleeding a soft pink. It’s hauntingly beautiful.

So with the introduction of our new Goth Mommy medicine maker Bella noir I've been thinking about the medicine pals and you know how the handiwork pals if there is The screwdrivers in a chest they'll grab them out and use it to fix things that are damaged in the base. Well I'm sure you can see where this is going I think it should be made where if you have a medicine pal in base anytime a pal gets a sickness condition like depressed overeating all those other ones that the medicine Pal should be able to go to the chest grab the needed medicine and administer it to the Pal to get them back to better health. But I don't know what are your guys's thoughts do you think this would be too op or are you on my side in thinking That this would make people more willing to set their bases to super hard working because they know their pals will be cared for ?

I apologise if this is all a mess or hard to understand.
My best friend of 10 years Joey (25M) has been with his girlfriend Ellie (21F) for around 7 months now, they are engaged and getting married in a few months time. I’m his best man.
I’m struggling with this idea as I’m quickly learning she’s a little bit (I don’t like to call anyone this but) crazy and I’m not sure what to do.
I few red flags-
Obviously getting married so soon. He’s never talked about getting married before. I know she’s got to have put all these ideas into his head.
Ellie has sent messages to Joeys ex girlfriend Sarah (21F) telling her to kill herself and all this other horrible stuff. Shes even sent fake pregnancy scans to her just to mess with her. (I’m going to come back to this part later as a lot of stuff kicked off yesterday with this).
She’s never worked. Joey has now taken a credit card out and given it her. She’s borrowed a bit of money off his sister and spent it on clothes and mini breaks away. (His family are starting to see the crazy come out now too).
None of her family are coming to the wedding. They don’t even speak to her.
I’ve seen Joey twice this year since he’s been with her. She has a 3 year old kid and if he goes out she has to be with him which never happens because she can never get a babysitter.
Oh and they are trying for a baby..
It’s all a mess. I don’t see how he can’t see what’s going on. Anyway back to them messages she sent to Sarah and the stuff that kicked off yesterday. (I still speak to Sarah, although she can be a bit intense sometimes she’s never done anything wrong to me). Sarah has found out we are all in going to the same event next month at our local bar so she’s messaged one of our mutual friends freaking out a bit worried there’s going to be trouble. Sarah has now messaged Joeys mum asking politely if she could have a work with Joey and Ellie about leaving her alone because she doesn’t want trouble at this event. She’s told her about these messages and his mum is not happy. His mum has now messaged me asking if I know about them and I confirmed it all because I’m not going to start lying for people. We talked for a little bit and she has started to notice a lot of things off with Ellie too.
Now Ellie is denying sending all this stuff, even to me which is crazy because she has shown them to me and even bragged about sending them to a few people in our friend group. Sarah still has all the messages saved as well.
Now I’m in the middle of what feels like a family war. I can’t even speak to Joey because Ellie pretty much controls his phone and she can’t be apart from him.
Like what can I even do in this situation? I feel like I’ve caused more trouble by telling his mum about the messages and some other stuff about her.
I feel like ignoring everyone for a few weeks and hope it all blows over.