Hbo: real sex
(2) = đŹđ§ âïž (Atlantis Duâąbai) DUTCH bai = âȘïž (Philistine) some people repeat same mistakes because they refuse yo read & Applied! What they did to Saddam Hussein đđ» is what happened to Eliakim, son of Hilkiah. Dragged OUT!! Like a donkey đ« âAntiâ Christ (the Album by âririâ real name Robyn)
2024.05.19 14:59 Odd-Hand-2026 (2) = đŹđ§ âïž (Atlantis Duâąbai) DUTCH bai = âȘïž (Philistine) some people repeat same mistakes because they refuse yo read & Applied! What they did to Saddam Hussein đđ» is what happened to Eliakim, son of Hilkiah. Dragged OUT!! Like a donkey đ« âAntiâ Christ (the Album by âririâ real name Robyn)
everything they Jacob touches = brings curse only now you seeing it.. and then wanted to hit Jerusalem in favor of lying cheating stealing Palestine. You are not fir to be a leader the real jew demons are JA (Jewish Americans) they also tried to sue me.. over some other mans mess.. the persecution of jews in this land Egypt the land of bondage til they return to jewish Religious state they fought so hard for. They also make it bad for other jews of all kinds by the wickedness they have did and invested in.. namely idols.. one who rides a w h o r e donkey to Jerusalem Armenia Mexico = Donkey. I never even had sex in the west. Ask âEmmanuelâ the french Merâąovâąinâągiaâąn đ«đ·đźđč connection.. itâs all The west. But he forgot.. them you have Nazi costume Harry their.. Gia was a Italian âsupermodelâ from Philly Gia Carangi born 1960 she was a drug addict and she AIDS she was diagnosed in what year? What year? Guess? ⊠1985 (inner earth Agartha Angie/ Beyonce) Everything i told them and their own systems told them.. Didnât listen.. signs coming in from sky they still donât get it.. had They didnt choose the Spirit of truth they choose âConsequencesâ when i already DID the work.. 3 years in La .. DJT set him up.. because he went to Jerusalem in 2017 and Called Kimberly his friend âIn the WHITE HOUSEâ this man was the enemy of the world and heaven. and by his own disloyalty and blindness betrayed what was for him in a impossible. Tear the idols bronze down and having the never to be in front of a maternity ward get real.. and let the word of God OT and NT be available without punishment, distortion changing the word to suit your agenda = a curse.
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2024.05.19 14:59 Looking4Sunshine2Day Yâall Are Disgusting LOL
Enjoy your dirty guilt sex with that over used hole trying to replace me đ€Ł the self respect is overflowing for yas both
Real big growth when I knew yas were banging all along you guilt ridden trash bags hahahah
Iâm sure itâs super enjoyable when they canât tell if youâre fucking or itâs a ghost / maybe even a plant fucking. You make me sick both of you, and for real you deserve eachother you crazy fucks
Whatever story you need to like yourselves again after the trauma and damage you put people through lol
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2024.05.19 14:54 hypomassive ADHD is ruining my relationship
Recently diagnosed and all of my character flaws I spent years thinking were me being a bad person are all linked to ADHD. I thought me getting a diagnosis would help my partner understand that the things that I do are not out of malice but me being neurodivergent. I felt he was understanding for about a week but now he is back thinking it is used as an excuse.
He had a bad day yesterday and I didn't ask him how was this morning, I honestly forgot. He was telling me about how he was feeling, I tried to show I was listening by bringing something back to me and what I would do, he rolls his eyes and said HIM 'I am not talking about you' I tell him what I honestly thinking of situation HIM 'I should not tell you things, you throw everything back in my face.'
I started medication just yesterday, I am not taking it for me I am taking it for sake of my relationship with him and kids. Even on my worst spiralling day I don't need medication to get through a work day, I can get my work done as I somewhat enjoy my job . I am taking it for emotional regulation and executive function around the house and to stop making dangerous mistakes.
I am actually at the point where I think we are just not compatible, he has a high sex drive, mine is low. His love language is acts of service and touch, I am bad at one and don't like the other. He is a very sensitive person emotionally and I am a real tough cookie and say it like it is. Last week we were actually laughing again, opening up to one another and I was hopeful things were getting better. But I think he preferred it when he could blame my issues on my character and not a condition. I think he just doesn't love for who I am and unfortunately I know now it's going to be hard for me to change.
TLTR - Husband not understanding of ADHD even with diagnosis. I am not meeting his emotional or physical needs and it is causing a rift in relationship.
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2024.05.19 14:16 AmazingLawfulness984 Have any of you shared your illness with your SO
I have literally just found out about all this, Iâve suffered from this since I can remember being on the later side of my teens, for years Id just try drown out my thoughts until recently I came back to smoking weed after a long break due to mental issues, and ever since then Iâve became so âOCDâ about cleaning every square inch of my bedroom, making sure the bathroom tap is perfectly centred, checking itâs definitely not running 5/6 times even though I know for sure, along with these constant shameful memories of me when I was a child and in my early teens. So I tell my partner about the basic OCD stuff and they tell me that sort of stuff comes from other unresolved issues Iâm having and thatâs how I find this page, part of its comforting knowing itâs a real thing and other people are in the same boat but the other is scary knowing I have this bug inside my head thatâs real and I genuinely canât let go of now. The guilt is unbearable and to make it worse my partner is the purest soul I know I love them unconditionally and vise versa but canât help feel like if they knew the things Iâd really done then even if they were supportive it would change their outlook on me and eventually destroy the relationship. So I see a lot of people saying confessions donât help so I donât even want to tell them that I have this problem as it will make them wonder what Iâve done to make me feel so guilty. All I can say that I was probably a sexually curious child even though some of the events are so young that I had no concept of sex whatsoever but canât help feel like Iâm fraud to my partner I so often just want to break down and tell them everything but yeah, I really just wanted to vent guys never said any of this in my life.
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2024.05.19 14:14 Ok-Werewolf-7980 AITA for telling my family publicly what happened?
TW: SA Heads up itâs a long post
AITA for telling my whole family by a family Facebook post about how my sisters fiancĂ© sexually assaulted me? Hereâs some back story.
My sister (mid 20s) and her or was her fiancĂ© (early 30s?) have been together for years and have have known each other since she was around 15. Iâve been around him since I was 4 as he used to be my neighbour and my sisterâs friend (he was dating another woman back then and was also having kids at the time). I always felt off about him even being only 4 and turns out I was right. Growing up I had full grown adults joking about me having a âcrushâ on him (a full grown adult man btwâ and that always made me feel uneasy.
Just before I turned 18 last year I had a massive breakup with my almost 2 year boyfriend while also grieving a loss of a love one (my exs dad). While we were going through the breakup process (was still 17) my sisters fiancĂ© started to get weird and my ex had to reply to him while we were breaking up as well. I then turned 18 and things got worse (I wonât be going into detail). I briefly told my mum that he was being weird and flirty but I told her not to tell my sister at least not yet as I was already going through so much. He then started sending me inappropriate pictures and saying inappropriate things and much worse things that is a bit much for anyone to hear. I didnât tell anyone because I didnât want to A hurt my sister and B thought people wouldnât believe me anyways. This went on for months.
Then it started happening in person. So I finally broke to my sister one night after it had gotten worse. I had small proof but not enough proof. I had screenshots of him telling me about his sex life and also screenshotted me telling him I would tell her about everything that happened with him also threatening me if I did. None of that was enough. She even said I was the one flirting and messaging him which was actually the other way around. I did text him a few times to make sure he was ok after bad medical episodes though. She pushed my mum away for not telling her as well as myself. A couple weeks after she did break up with him but really not much was different they are and weâre still hanging out. They have a kid together so he goes there for his kid apparently but heâs there a lot more than that. I also seen pictures of them hanging out and being really close.
Yesterday I was thinking about the situation a lot. I was thinking about how my whole family was still hanging around him without many issues. I was thinking about how immediate family wasnât telling other family and family friends what was really happening. I was thinking about how everyone was painting my sister as the victim and nobody cared to reach out to me. I was thinking about how other girls and maybe even kids could get affected. I was thinking about how Iâm only 19 going through all of this. I got really angry with how I was being treated and made a rash decision to make a post on my Facebook saying âFor my family deciding to hide the truth.. The fact you let your own daughter,sister and etc be sexually harassed by âfamilyâand just move on and pretend nothing happened disgusting. The fact you can all hang out and pretend you're family with him is disgusting. To hardly believe me in the first place with proof is digusting. I'm done hiding the truth about everything that affects me in my life so people can look "good". This is not ok. Get mad at me for telling people? Maybe you should've cared about what I went through. Barely 18 getting harassed by an almost 30 yr old. Iâm done being quiet about peoples behaviour (in general). Itâs mentally and physically drainingâ.
After posting this I didnât know whether to regret it or not. My aunty messaged me to say that he has to be around for the kids and thatâs they need to for good parenting. I explained they werenât hanging around just for his and even so is he good for the kids?. She ignored me. I then had my mum call me dozens of times but I ignored it. She messaged me to say that her, dad and my other sister donât agree with whatâs happening but I feel actions speak louder than words and that itâs almost hard to believe. My mum had also told me something I didnât know which was that my sister messaged my ex when I first told her and probably to ask about the messages between him and my sisters fiancĂ© I was angry about that because we had been broken up and no contact (still are) for at least a year and she knew everything I went through with him. My dad messaged me to see if I was ok maybe he is feeling the same as me I donât know. A couple weeks ago he went to talk to my sister about being civil with me and to get along even with the situation going on so maybe my dad is on my side but again I donât know and wish the actions were bigger than the words. After small texts back to them I decided to go to sleep.
Today I woke up to my sister telling me sheâs cutting all ties with me altogether and we are basically no longer sisters etc she also said the same for my nephew (only 3 years old). she then went on to say how I was slandering my nephews father publicly on Facebook and that it wasnât ok. She then went onto say that I didnât have any real âproofâ yes she used those marks. She said I will no longer be able to see my nephew again whoâs only 3 btw. She then said â if you think Iâm going to allow him (nephew) around someone who is publicly bashing and slandering his father on Facebook, you have another thing coming. Felt like a threat tbh. I didnât fully know what to think and I still donât. I pretty much ignored and didnât reply to the message all I said is sheâs not getting an argument out of me. I told my friends what was happening they didnât listen and nobody really is. I do have therapy but thereâs so much other stuff I need to talk to my therapist about and a therapist canât fix my whole family. So was I wrong for the post I made? What do I do?
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2024.05.19 14:10 iwokeupabillionare Annie Who Are You? L'inconnue de la Seine. The Girl who never drowned.
Context Michael Jacksonâs song 'Smooth Criminal' featured on his seventh album Bad (1987). The song is about a woman being attacked in their apartment. It used the refrain âAnnie Are You Ok?â which is used to teach students CPR on CPR mannequin Annie (Wikipedia, 2023). âResusci Anne was developed by the Norwegian toy maker Ă
smund S. LĂŠrdal and the Austrian-Czech physician Peter Safar and American physician James Elamâ (Wikipedia, 2023). The oldest version is the proto-CPR mannequin of the world. It was invented after Asmund âwas alerted to⊠physicians and engineers in Baltimore that had a new and much more effective method for resuscitation, involving mouth-to-mouth breathingâ. The creation was sentimental as Tore, his son, had experienced drowning. The doll was modelled after the face of the death mask, âLâ inconnue de la Seineâ translated from French to English meaning âThe unknown of the Seineâ (A rich heritage, 2023). They chose the face of a young female as male doctors wouldâve felt uncomfortable practising on a same-sexed doll . Additionally, to resurrect a girl âmillions of times is at the centre of a macabre mystery.â
Legend Legend states, a young female corpse was pulled from the river Seine, the death mask was moulded on the corpse's face by a pathologist as they were beheld by her beauty. The corpse awaited with other bodies for identification which never came in the Paris Morgue. This practise was real as âtwo-thirds of the corpses dealt with by the morgue fished out of the Seine" were "suicides, accidental drownings or murdersâ (The Guardian, 2007).
Eric Nadeau stated "the pathologist asked for a mould to be made of the young womanâs face and the closest moulder was [their] very own Michel Lorenzi who founded Artlier Lorenzi, a molding workshop founded in 1871 â19, Rue Racineâ (Morgan, 2017) . A suggestion from a now deleted post by users:
and the link provided by
in this thread provided contradicting info, Phoebe Judge stated that Eric Nardeau stated that the mask wasnât created of a corpse, but Lorenzi stated in a 1914 French interview, but of a living model in 1866. The mask was made due to the model's popularity with other artists (The unknown woman, p.8, 2023).
According to Nadeau: âMichel Lorenzi, who was from an old moulding family based in a small village near Lucca, Italy and arrived in Paris around 1850â (Morgan, 2017). Although, another source stated that âMichel had a house in Piano. di Coreglia, came to settle in Paris around 1868â (LORENZI Pierre- Sculptor, n.d). It's possible the mask wasn't created in France but Italy according to the date Michel Lorenzi moved and the creation year of the mask provided by Nadeau.
Debunkers Claire Forestier, a descendant of the original Lorenzi stated the death maskâs face has " full, rounded cheeks ... smooth skinâŠ[usually akin to] casts taken from living faces [as they are] are so clear, so detailed, that when you look at the eyelids you can just see the eyeballs' movement underneath. That's the case with the Inconnue" (The Guardian, 2007).
â⊠moored at their headquarters near the Pont d'Austerlitz, Chief Brigadier Pascal Jacquin was less than convinced that the girl was dead when the mask was madeâ according to them âthe drowned and suicides, they never look so peaceful. They're swollen, they don't look nice" (Grange, 2013).
"In 1960, Pierre LiĂšvre reported to the magazine "Chercheurs et Curieux." The interview stated the then owner of Atelier Lorenzi's ancestor (presumably Michel Lorenzi) had "molded the Inconnue at the request of a forensic doctor, as quoted on March 28, 2020 in the "Cousu Main editions blog titled "L'Inconnue de la Seine" on cousumain.worldpress.com"". The writer Jean Ducourneau, whilst writing The Church of CĂ©line "(referenced below) [35, 36]", made a visit to rue Racine, they wrote the found that the mask "had been lifted on the face of a very pretty workshop model, reminding us that it is technically impossible for this mask to have been lifted on a corpse," reiterating the technical impossibility of this veil being lifted from a deceased body. "(In fact very quickly the rigidity cadaver blocks the mandibular joint and the smile would rather have been a rictus or a grimace)"
Origin of the Legend âThe name L'Inconnue de la Seine is quite late and probably dates from Ernst Benkard's collection of photographs in 1926 [25, 26] ⊠placed the Unknown Woman of the Seine on the cover of his collection of death masks, Das ewige Antlitz (The Eternal Face) [Figure 20]. The book was published in 1926. The myth of her death mask probably originates from Rainer Maria Rilkeâs Cahiers de Malte Laurids Brigge, published in Germany in 1910, in French 1911*.* âRilke arrived in Paris in 1902 and stayed at 3 rue de l'AbbĂ©-de-l'ĂpĂ©e near rue Racine. [He] mentions the mask of the Unknown woman associated with that of Beethoven, in the window of the molder Lorenzi, rue Racine. âThe face of the young drowned woman that was cast in the morgue, because it was beautiful and because it smiled, because it smiled so deceptively . ". [23L page 72 Points edition] [Figure 11].â (Jean-Pierre, 2022).
Beginning Art History According to Gaelle-Salliot (2017), Lorenziâs grandniece stated that the death mask was first used for the 19th tetes dâexpression at Ecole Beaux Arts. The author cited Edourd Papetâs (2008, p. 20) fact that the death mask was earliest depicted in Charles Bargue and Jean Leon-Geromeâs cours de dessin a drawing manual which features a drawing of Homer. She is depicted in Figure 2 (GaĂ«lle-Salliot, 2017, p.7). This drawing manual didn't reference a story of that of drown girl etc.
Potential real facts about the Jane Doe An alternative name for the live cast is âLa Belle Italienneâ, from Frenct to English meaning, âThe Beautiful Italianâ. Sheâs seen in A. Daprato & Co. Boston, Manufacturer of Plastic Arts. âSeveral plaster casts manufacturer in the United States added a portrait of the girl in their [catalogue] collection, but in all [catalogue] she is named as La Belle Italienne. Why Italian?. This is a curious fact, it is a true information or an error because the girl was unknown?â She is seen with the name in âP.P. Caproni & Bro. Boston, Plastic Arts. 1911 cat [-ologue]. Masks n° 13525 La Belle Italienne, from life $ 1,00â (Felice, 2012). âForestier thinks she must have been at most 16 for her skin to be so firm and smoothâ (The Guardian, 2007). âAccording to the draughtsman Georges Villa, who received this information from his master, the painter Jules Joseph Lefebvre, the impression was taken from the face of a young model who died of tuberculosis around 1875, but no trace of the original cast remainedâ (M, Bessy, 1981 cited by Wikipedia, 2023)â. However, according to Marious Grout, the model was famous and working for âartists around 1875â (GaĂ«lle-Salliot, pp.6-7, 2015).
False leads According to Alvarez (2015) the model of mask gained success in German with their father in a Hamburg factory that reproduced the mask (GaĂ«lle-Salliot, 2017). This fact doesnât lead to anywhere. She was also identified as a Russian prostitute named Valerie who committed suicide, buried in Pere- Lachaise (GaĂ«lle-Salliot, 2017). Although, this comes from the fictional book The Mask by William Wood (G. E. W. H, 1951, p.6). As well as, Ewa Lazlo, a creation of John Goto, who wrote a fictional investigative story identifying the model. They âassumed that people would have a postmodern view and treat it as fictional," and they "really didn't expect [people] to take it seriously" as people online took his story to be factual (Grange, 2013).
Conclusion She has the artistic reverence and mystery of a once youthful girl alike Afghan girl. âIn light of the Cold War, the portrait was described as the "First World's Third World Mona Lisa"â according to S. Hesford and Kozol (2005) cited by Wikipedia, 2023. A title formally given to Lâ inconnue de la Seine âbecause of her mysterious smile, âMona Lisa of suicideâ (Aragon)â (Jean-Pierre, 2022). The legend casts a great shadow over her identity, as the story ends with a corpse; she is muse whoâs story is reinvented time and time again. It is possible that not resources all have been exhausted, there is potentially more information that could be obtained by the Artlier Lorenzi. Additionally, we still donât known the causes-effects that lead to Georges Villa obtaining information about her, it is possible that other documents about this figure exist from this contemporary art community . If this person is Italian - a small possibility â this personâs life could have been documented in Italian records waiting for a face to match the details.
TLDR: An unidentified model possibly of Italian origin, was used to create a live cast of a bust. It was recreated repeatedly. The bust was misreported to a be a âdeath maskâ of girl who drowned in the river Seine, in late 19th century France, from a pathologist in awe of her beauty created the mask. Long after, she became a muse for many artists. Then, she became the model of the first CPR doll in the 1960s. Finally, the victim of a melodic tragedy âSmooth Criminalâ. No one knows the modelâs identity.
Fact-file Name: Unknown
Age: 16+/- (The Guardian, 2007)
Born: 1850+/- (Based upon the possible creation year of the mask from The unknown woman, p.8, 2023 and possible age range of the model from the Guardian, 2007)
Modelled: 1866? (The Unknown woman, p.8, 2023)
Death year: 1875? (Bessy, 1981 cited by Wikipedia, 2023)
Death cause: Tuberculosis? (Bessy, 1981 cited by Wikipedia, 2023)
Ethnicity: Italian? (Felice, 2012)
Occupation: Model for live casts
Place of work: Lucca, Italy (LORENZI Pierre- Sculptor, n.d) or Artlier Lorenzi, France (Morgan, 2017)?
Employer: Michel Lorenzi (The Guardian, 2007 et al.)
References: - Bessy, Maurice (1981). 'Mort, oĂč est ton visage?' Monaco: Ăditions du Rocher via Wikipedia (2023). 'L' inconnue de la Seine'. Available at: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/L%27Inconnue_de_la_Seine [Accessed: 18th March 2024]
- Felice, Andrea (2012). ''La Belle Italienne'. FELICECALCHI The Plaster Casting Journal'. Available at: https://felicecalchi.blogspot.com/2012/05/la-belle-italienne.html [Accessed: 7th Dec 2023]
- Gaëlle-Salliot, Anne (2015). 'Drowned Muse: Casting the Unknown Woman of the Seine Across the Tides of Modernity'. Oxford University Press. Available at: https://books.google.com/books?id=1QBlCgAAQBAJ [Accessed: 18th March 2024]
- 'G. E. W. H' (1951). The Sydney Morning Herald. Available at: https://books.google.co.uk/books?id=tPkQAAAAIBAJ&pg=PA6&dq=The+Sydney+Morning+Herald+l%27inconnue+de+la+seine&article_id=2195,5150417&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiDqpGim5iGAxX8_7sIHQwoB7UQ6AF6BAgHEAI [Accessed: 6th Dec 2023]
- Guardian (2007). 'Ophelia of the Seine'. Available at: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2007/dec/01/france.art [Accessed: 6th Dec 2023]
- Grange, Jeremy (2013). 'Resusci Anne and L'Inconnue: The Mona Lisa of the Seine'. BBC News. Available at: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-24534069. [Accessed: 6th Nov 2023]
- Jean-Pierre, Haberer (2022). 'From âThe Unknown Woman of the Seineâ to Resusci Anne'. CHAR-fr. 22nd Nov 2022. Available at: https://char-fr.net/*Haberer-Jean-Pierre*.html [Accessed: 18th March 2024]
- LORENZI Pierre- Sculptor (n.d). 'Monumentsmorts'. Available at: https://monumentsmorts.univ-lille.fauteu1881/lorenzipierre/ [Accessed: 7th Dec 2023]
- Morgan, Emma (2021). ''Journées du patrimoine: Meet the maker behind world's most kissed face'.' Connexion France. Available at: https://beta.connexionfrance.com/tag/art [Accessed: 9th Dec 2023]
- One Million Lives, (2023). 'A rich Heritage'. Available at: https://one-million-lives.com/a-rich-heritage/ [Accessed: 6th Dec 2023]
- This is criminal (2023). 'Episode 223: The Unknown Woman Air Date: June 16, 2023'. VOX MEDIA [Online]. Available at: https://www.connexionfrance.com/article/People/Interviews/Atelier-Lorenzi-historic-moulding-studio-workshop-opens-doors-to-public-for-one-day-for-Journees-du-patrimoine. [Accessed: 6th Dec 2023] p.8
- Wikipedia (2023). 'Afghan Girl'. Available at: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Afghan_Girl [Accessed: 7th Dec, 2023]
- Wikipedia (2023). 'L'inconnue de la Seine (masque mortuaire)'. Available at: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/L%27Inconnue_de_la_Seine [Accessed: 8th Dec 2023]
- Wikipedia (2023). 'Resusci Annie'. Available at: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Resusci_Anne [Accessed: 6th Dec 2023]
- Wikipedia (2023). 'Smooth Criminal'. Available at: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smooth_Criminal [Accessed: 6th Dec 2023]
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2024.05.19 14:08 Ok-Werewolf-7980 Am I wrong for telling my family publicly what happened?
Am I wrong for telling my family publicly what happened?
TW: SA Heads up itâs a long post
AITA for telling my whole family by a family Facebook post about how my sisters fiancĂ© sexually assaulted me? Hereâs some back story.
My sister (mid 20s) and her or was her fiancĂ© (early 30s?) have been together for years and have have known each other since she was around 15. Iâve been around him since I was 4 as he used to be my neighbour and my sisterâs friend (he was dating another woman back then and was also having kids at the time). I always felt off about him even being only 4 and turns out I was right. Growing up I had full grown adults joking about me having a âcrushâ on him (a full grown adult man btwâ and that always made me feel uneasy.
Just before I turned 18 last year I had a massive breakup with my almost 2 year boyfriend while also grieving a loss of a love one (my exs dad). While we were going through the breakup process (was still 17) my sisters fiancĂ© started to get weird and my ex had to reply to him while we were breaking up as well. I then turned 18 and things got worse (I wonât be going into detail). I briefly told my mum that he was being weird and flirty but I told her not to tell my sister at least not yet as I was already going through so much. He then started sending me inappropriate pictures and saying inappropriate things and much worse things that is a bit much for anyone to hear. I didnât tell anyone because I didnât want to A hurt my sister and B thought people wouldnât believe me anyways. This went on for months.
Then it started happening in person. So I finally broke to my sister one night after it had gotten worse. I had small proof but not enough proof. I had screenshots of him telling me about his sex life and also screenshotted me telling him I would tell her about everything that happened with him also threatening me if I did. None of that was enough. She even said I was the one flirting and messaging him which was actually the other way around. I did text him a few times to make sure he was ok after bad medical episodes though. She pushed my mum away for not telling her as well as myself. A couple weeks after she did break up with him but really not much was different they are and weâre still hanging out. They have a kid together so he goes there for his kid apparently but heâs there a lot more than that. I also seen pictures of them hanging out and being really close.
Yesterday I was thinking about the situation a lot. I was thinking about how my whole family was still hanging around him without many issues. I was thinking about how immediate family wasnât telling other family and family friends what was really happening. I was thinking about how everyone was painting my sister as the victim and nobody cared to reach out to me. I was thinking about how other girls and maybe even kids could get affected. I was thinking about how Iâm only 19 going through all of this. I got really angry with how I was being treated and made a rash decision to make a post on my Facebook saying âFor my family deciding to hide the truth.. The fact you let your own daughter,sister and etc be sexually harassed by âfamilyâand just move on and pretend nothing happened disgusting. The fact you can all hang out and pretend you're family with him is disgusting. To hardly believe me in the first place with proof is digusting. I'm done hiding the truth about everything that affects me in my life so people can look "good". This is not ok. Get mad at me for telling people? Maybe you should've cared about what I went through. Barely 18 getting harassed by an almost 30 yr old. Iâm done being quiet about peoples behaviour (in general). Itâs mentally and physically drainingâ.
After posting this I didnât know whether to regret it or not. My aunty messaged me to say that he has to be around for the kids and thatâs they need to for good parenting. I explained they werenât hanging around just for his and even so is he good for the kids?. She ignored me. I then had my mum call me dozens of times but I ignored it. She messaged me to say that her, dad and my other sister donât agree with whatâs happening but I feel actions speak louder than words and that itâs almost hard to believe. My mum had also told me something I didnât know which was that my sister messaged my ex when I first told her and probably to ask about the messages between him and my sisters fiancĂ© I was angry about that because we had been broken up and no contact (still are) for at least a year and she knew everything I went through with him. My dad messaged me to see if I was ok maybe he is feeling the same as me I donât know. A couple weeks ago he went to talk to my sister about being civil with me and to get along even with the situation going on so maybe my dad is on my side but again I donât know and wish the actions were bigger than the words. After small texts back to them I decided to go to sleep.
Today I woke up to my sister telling me sheâs cutting all ties with me altogether and we are basically no longer sisters etc she also said the same for my nephew (only 3 years old). she then went on to say how I was slandering my nephews father publicly on Facebook and that it wasnât ok. She then went onto say that I didnât have any real âproofâ yes she used those marks. She said I will no longer be able to see my nephew again whoâs only 3 btw. She then said â if you think Iâm going to allow him (nephew) around someone who is publicly bashing and slandering his father on Facebook, you have another thing coming. Felt like a threat tbh. I didnât fully know what to think and I still donât. I pretty much ignored and didnât reply to the message all I said is sheâs not getting an argument out of me. I told my friends what was happening they didnât listen and nobody really is. I do have therapy but thereâs so much other stuff I need to talk to my therapist about and a therapist canât fix my whole family. So was I wrong for the post I made? What do I do?
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2024.05.19 14:08 Yurii_S_Kh Monotheism, Part 3: Islam
| Islam: Origins Jibril (Gabriel) appears before Mohammed, drawing The religion of the Law, which for 15 centuries prepared the chosen people for the coming into the world of the its Savior, the Incarnate Lord Jesus Christ, preceded New Testament religion. According to the Holy Apostle Paul, "the law was our schoolmaster to bring us unto Christ" (Gal. 3:24). It was all in all only "a shadow of good things to come" (Heb. 10:1). When the Savior came into the world, Old Testament religion had fulfilled its purpose. Our Lord Jesus Christ revealed to us the mystery of the Heavenly Kingdom and established the New Covenant, which was foretold by the prophet Jeremiah. "Behold, the days come, saith the Lord, that I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel, and with the house of Judah: Not according to the covenant that I made with their fathers in the day that I took them by the hand to bring them out of the land of Egypt; which my covenant they brake, although I was an husband unto them, saith the Lord: But this shall be the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel; After those days, saith the Lord, I will put my law in their inward parts, and write it in their hearts; and will be their God, and they shall be my people" (Jer. 31:31-33). Man was redeemed from original sin and its consequences by the voluntary death on the Cross of Jesus Christ as Savior of the World. He entered into an entirely new period in terms of his relationship with God in comparison with the Old Testament: instead of the law, there was a free condition of sonship and grace. Man received new means for achieving the ideal set for him of moral perfection as a necessary condition for salvation. Islam, having arisen in Arabia in the seventh century, appeared as the religion of the law six centuries after the God of the chosen people of the religion of the Law fulfilled its purpose. The difference between the Old Testament religion of the Law and Islam is not only that the latter emerged more than two thousand years after God gave on Mount Sinai the Ten Commandments and other precepts that governed life for the chosen people. The most important difference is that the Law of Moses has a Divine source. The book of Exodus gives a narrative of the majestic Epiphany. "And Moses brought forth the people out of the camp to meet with God; and they stood at the nether part of the mount. And mount Sinai was altogether on a smoke, because the Lord descended upon it in fire: and the smoke thereof ascended as the smoke of a furnace, and the whole mount quaked greatly. And when the voice of the trumpet sounded long, and waxed louder and louder, Moses spake, and God answered him by a voice. And the Lord came down upon mount Sinai, on the top of the mount: and the Lord called Moses up to the top of the mount; and Moses went up" (Exod. 19:17-20). The founder of Islam, however, did not have a Divine revelation. How did Islam arise? We read about this in the Hadith âAl-Jamii al-Sahihâ. A mysterious being began to visit Mohammed. He slept in a cave on the slope of Mount Hira. On the night of the 24th of the month of Ramadan in year 610 someone appeared to him in human form. This event is considered the beginning of Islam. This story about it is from the Sunnah: â[A]n angel appeared to him and bade him 'READ!' 'I am no reader!' Mohammed replied in great trepidation, whereon the angel shook him violently and again bade him read. This was repeated three times, when the angel uttered the five verses that commence the 96th chapter: 'READ! in the name of thy Lord, who did createâwho did create man from congealed blood. READ! for thy Lord is the most generous.ââ Mohammed puzzled over whether a demon or angel visited him. He confided his experiences in his wife Khadijah. I will introduce more of the story of Mohammed's biography, generally accepted by Muslims: âShe said to the messenger of God, âO son of my uncle, are you able to tell me about your visitant, when he comes to you?â He replied that he could, and she asked him to tell her when he came. So when Gabriel came to him, as he was wont the apostle said to Khadija, âThis is Gabriel who has just come to me.â âGet up, O son of my uncle,â she said, âand sit by my left thigh.â The apostle did so, and she said, âCan you see him?â âYes,â he said. She said, âThen turn round and sit on my right thigh.â He did so, and she said, âCan you see him?â When he said that he could she asked him to move and sit in her lap. When he had done this she again asked if he could see him, and when he said yes, she disclosed her form and cast aside her veil while the apostle was sitting in her lap. Then she said, âCan you see him?â And he replied, âNo.â She said, âO son of my uncle, rejoice and be of good heart, by God he is an angel and not a satanââ (Ibn Hisham, Biography of the Prophet Muhammad). It is surprising how easily and, gently speaking, naively this question, which in the spiritual realm is a question of life or death, had been answered with the help of a woman. Before all else, an Angel is a bodiless being, and for his sight there are no actual barriers: one can see through even clothes. Clothes hide nudity only from the eyes of man. Even so, the body of man in and of itself is not something perverse or shameful. It is a creation of God. The lust of man is sinful as well as is carnal desire, but not the body. In paradise the progenitors were naked and were not ashamed (see Gen. 2:25). The nature of an Angel is inviolate. They are alien to passions of man. But if this was a demon, then he could easily resort to trickery. Knowing how they tested him, he especially would be able to take leave of himself, so that they would take him for an Angel. The attitude of Islam towards the Bible Islam emerged as something syncretic out of several sources: ancient Arabic cults, Judaism, Christianity, Hanifism (a pre-Islamic monotheistic movement in Arabia) and Mazdaism (an ancient Iranian religion). There is no doubt that the Old Testament holy books and the Gospel had an influence on the formation of Islam. In the Quran many people and events from biblical history are mentioned. However, these stories are presented completely arbitrarily and inaccurately. According to the Quran, man was created from water. "It is He Who has created man from water: Then has He established relationships of lineage and marriage: for thy Lord has power (over all things)" (25:54). In another surah, it says: "Proclaim! (or read!) in the name of thy Lord and Cherisher, Who created man, out of a (mere) clot of congealed blood" (96:1-2). In another part it speaks about clay, "He created man from sounding clay like unto pottery" (55:14). In contrast to the Bible, the Quran does not say that man was created in the image and likeness of God. This discrepancy is most profound. With God's image and likeness, man is summoned to commune directly with his Creator. He can become one with the Lord. This is not so in Islam. The book of Genesis tells the story of how the entire family of the patriarch Noah (in Arabic, Nuh) was saved in the Ark. The Quran speaks about the death of Noah's son: "So the Ark floated with them on the waves (towering) like mountains, and Noah called out to his son, who had separated himself (from the rest): âO my son! Embark with us, and be not with the unbelievers!â The son replied: âI will betake myself to some mountain: it will save me from the water.â Noah said: âThis day nothing can save, from the command of Allah, any but those on whom He hath mercy!â And the waves came between them, and the son was among those overwhelmed in the Flood" (11:42-43). Another surah tells it somewhat differently: "(Remember) Noah, when he cried (to Us) aforetime: We listened to his (prayer) and delivered him and his family from great distress" (21:76). There is no need to provide more examples. In the Quran, things are especially distorted when discussing New Testament events. Here the differences are purely fundamental. The Incarnation, the Crucifixion on Golgotha, and the Resurrection are all denied. Even the event of the Nativity of Christ, known to the whole world, is described very strangely. It is alleged that Maryam retreated to a faraway place and gave birth to a Son under palms (19:23). In this surah, called Maryam, She is called the "sister of Harun," i.e. Aaron. He indeed had a sister named Miriam, but she lived 15 centuries before the Nativity of Christ. Probably due to so great a number of errors and distortions, many representatives of Islam, in order to escape from this quandary, allege that the modern Holy Scripture of Christians has been distorted (a circumstance known as tahrif). Immediately, the question arises: what evidence do they provide? There is no evidence. Characteristically, the view of Muslims toward the Bible has undergone significant change over the course of several centuries. Early Islamic writers such as al-Tabari and ar-Razi believed that the distortion comes down to tahrif bi'al ma'ni, i.e. the corruption of the meaning without changing the text. However, later authors such as Ibn Hazm and Al-Biruni introduced the idea of tahrif biâal-lafz, i.e. the corruption of the text itself. At that, both of these positions have been preserved to the present day. Thus, the level of acceptance among Muslims of the Bible depends on one's understanding of tahrif. The very existence of these fundamentally different positions indicates that there is no concrete evidence. It is impossible to ignore one interesting feature of the attitude that representatives of Islam have toward the Biblical text. In that they do not have their own "undistorted" biblical text, they cite our canonical text as undistorted. However, when they need to support a point, for example, negative examples from the life of Banu Isra'il (the children of Israel) with a reference to parts that do not conform to Islam, they proclaim the text to be distorted. Muslims allege that the New Testament (Injil), which the Quran refers to positively, is not in fact the current four Gospels. We have already said that they do not provide any evidence. The falsehood of the accusation that Christians distorted the Scriptures stems from the internal inconsistencies of the very Islamic authors who wrote on this theme. According to the Quran, the New Testament was originally a true, sacred text. "And in their footsteps We sent Jesus the son of Mary, confirming the Law that had come before him: We sent him the Gospel: therein was guidance and light, and confirmation of the Law that had come before him: a guidance and an admonition to those who fear Allah" (5:46). In another section: "Say: âO People of the Book! ye have no ground to stand upon unless ye stand fast by the Law, the Gospel, and all the revelation that has come to you from your Lord.â It is the revelation that cometh to thee from thy Lord, that increaseth in most of them their obstinate rebellion and blasphemy" (5:68). This excerpt clearly demonstrates that the Quran itself does not speak of the distorted Scripture, but about "rebellion and blasphemy" related to misunderstanding. There is one part of the Quran (10:94) which is very problematic for Islamic commentators: "If thou wert in doubt as to what We have revealed unto thee, then ask those who have been reading the Book from before thee: the Truth hath indeed come to thee from thy Lord: so be in no wise of those in doubt." This ayat refers the Muslim "in doubt" to the authority of the biblical Holy Scripture. Abdul-Haqq writes: âThe learned doctors of Islam are sadly embarrassed by this verse, referring the prophet as it does to the people of the Book who would solve his doubtsâ (Abdul-Haqq, A. A. (1980). Sharing Your Faith With A Muslim. Minneapolis, MN: Bethany House Publishers. As cited in Geisler, N.L. (1999). Baker Encyclopedia of Christian Apologetics. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Publishing Group). According to the logic of this verse, the biblical Scripture was undistorted in the 7th century at the time of the Quran's creation. Then one must recognize that the current text is also correct, since we use manuscripts written over several centuries prior to the Quran. Textual criticism of the New Testament has achieved outstanding breakthroughs in the 20th century. Currently, there are over 2,328 manuscripts and manuscript fragments in Greek, coming to us from the first three centuries of Christianity. The most ancient New Testament manuscript, a part of the Gospel of John 18:31-33, 37-38, is the Rylands Library Papyrus P52, dated 117-138 in the era of the reign of emperor Hadrian. Adolf Deissmann acknowledges the possibility of the emergence of this papyrus even under the reign of Emperor Trajan (98-117). It is preserved in Manchester. Another ancient New Testament manuscript is the Papyrus Bodmer, P75. The 102 surviving pages contain the texts of the Gospels of Luke and John. "The editors, Victor Martin and Rodolphe Kasser, date this copy to between 175 and 225 A.D. It is thus the earliest surviving known copy of the Gospel according to Luke available today and one of the earliest of the Gospel according to John" (Bruce M. Metzger. The Text of the New Testament. p. 58). This precious manuscript is located in Geneva. Uncial script on parchment: leather codices with uncial script, (in Latin uncia means inch) letters without sharp corners and broken lines. This script is distinguished by its great refinement and precision. Each letter is disconnected. There are 362 uncial manuscripts of the New Testament. The most ancient of these codices (Codex Sinaiticus, Vaticanus, and Alexandrinus) have already been mentioned. Scholars complemented this impressive collection of ancient New Testament manuscripts with the New Testament text, which consisted of 36,286 excerpts of the Holy Scripture of the New Testament found in the works of the holy fathers and teachers of the Church from the first through fourth centuries. This text is lacking only 11 verses. Scholars of textual criticism in the 20th century did a tremendous job on the collation of allâseveral thousands ofâNew Testament manuscripts and identified all textual discrepancies caused by scribal error. An evaluation and typologization was performed. Precise criteria for determining a correct variant were established. For those familiar with this rigorous scientific work, it is obvious that allegations of the distortion of the current holy text of the New Testament are unfounded. In terms of the number of ancient manuscripts and the brevity of time separating the earliest surviving text from the original, no one work of antiquity can be compared with the New Testament. Accusations that the Bible's text is distorted are puzzling. How could it actually have been done? How could Christians and Hebrews have come together to do this? Everyone knows the degree of their mutual [doctrinalâEd.] alienation. And yet both Christians and Jews use one and the same canonical text of the Old Testament. Furthermore, the entire New Testament was preserved in the Chester Beatty Papyri, composed in approximately 250 A.D. It is inconceivable to accept that under the conditions that existed in Christian society, hundreds of exemplars of the New Testament text were miscopied for the purpose of distortion. On the Monotheism of Islam Historians and religious scholars regard the three "Abrahamic" religions, Christianity, Judaism, and Islam, as monotheistic religions. For the researcher, the doctrinal principles that representatives of each of these three religions formulate are sufficient. However, on a theological level, the insufficiency of such a formal approach becomes clear. Monotheism is a necessary but not sufficient condition for true religion. Only a religion that has Divine revelation as a source has the true and spiritually accurate doctrine concerning God. Christianity not only maintains that God is the living, absolute source, "the only true God" (John 17:3; 1 Thes. 1:9; cf. John 5:20), but also teaches thoroughly and in depth of the nature of God as without beginning, without end, and of a perfect Spirit. The chief characteristic of the Divine nature is love. "God is love" (1 John 4:16). These words of the apostle contain the principal idea of the New Testament as the good news of salvation. The ineffable goodness of God created the world. The Lord housed man in paradise. Even after the Fall, God continued to love mankind. The greatness of God's love was revealed when the incarnate God died a most agonizing death for us. Christians know from not only the Holy Scripture, but also through the power of spiritual experience, that God is all-knowing and all-wise. The apostle says: "Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do" (Heb. 4:13). God knows not only all that has happened, and all that is, but he has also perfect knowledge of the future. The mirror of the supreme Wisdom of God is the universe which He created, astounding man with its extraordinary complexity, beauty, and harmony. God demonstrates his ineffable Wisdom also in the dispensation of our salvation. "O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! how unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways past finding out" (Rom. 11:33). True religion is not limited by the demand of worship for the Creator. Its ultimate goal is the spiritual unity of man with God. The Savior speaks about this in a prayer to his Father before his suffering on the cross: "That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us" (John 17:21). From the aforementioned characteristics of the Divine follows the concept of true, Christian monotheism. There can be only one all-powerful and all-just God. The concept of God in Islam does not have a source of divine revelation. It developed on the basis of ancient Arabic religion. The word âAllahâ was used in the polytheistic pantheon of Arabs to denote âGodâ: Allah ( al - the definite article; ilah - god). Among the pagan Arabs, prior to their adoption of Islam, Allah was the supreme lunar deity, worshipped in north and central Arabia. The father of Muhammed, who was a pagan, was named Abdullah ("Servant of Allah"). In pre-Islamic times, the crescent moon was the symbol of the worship of the moon-god among the Arabs. This is confirmed by archeological evidence. The crescent moon was carried over as the main symbol of Islam. Arabs of the Syrian desert called the wife of Allah as Al-lÄt, and in the south of central Arabia, Al-âUzzĂĄ. In other areas of Arabia, they, along with Manat, were worshipped as the daughters of Allah. This genetic trail was preserved in the Quran. There is mention of this in the 53rd surah: "Have ye seen LÄt, and âUzzÄ, and another, the third (goddess), ManÄt? What! For you the male sex, and for Him, the female? Behold, such would be indeed a division most unfair!" (53:19-22). In Islam, Allah is a created religious image by the human consciousness. He does not express the real almighty divine personhood. Consequently, monotheism in Islam is imagined. In a number of places in the Quran, he is endowed with intrinsically human characteristics and traits. Allah says: - "Those who reject Our signs, We shall soon cast into the fire: as often as their skins are roasted through, We shall change them for fresh skins, that they may taste the penalty" (4:56);
- "...There is no help Except from God, the Exalted, the Wise: that He might cut off a fringe of the Unbelievers or expose them to infamy, and they should then be turned back, frustrated of their purpose: (3: 126â127);
- "The Hypocritesâthey think they are over-reaching God, but He will over-reach them" (4:142);
- "And (the unbelievers) plotted and planned, and God too planned, and the best of planners is God" (3:54);
- âMany are the Jinns and men we have made for Hell: they have hearts wherewith they understand not, eyes wherewith they see not, and ears wherewith they hear not. They are like cattle,ânay more misguided: for they are heedless (of warning)â (7:179).
What a great difference! Christianity teaches that God " will have all men to be saved, and to come unto the knowledge of the truth" (1 Tim. 2:4), while Islam maintains that Allah created many people for Gehenna. The idea of monotheism, ( tawhid, from the verb wahhadaâto reckon something as one) was formulated in the Quran in several surahs. For example, in the 16th surah, "The Bee": "For We assuredly sent amongst every people an apostle, (with the Command), "serve God, and eschew evil" (16:36). In the terminology of the sharia, anything people worship except for Allah is "taghut". Since Islam does not know of direct revelation, nor the holy Manifestation of God to the world, nor the unification of man with God on the foundation of love, its monotheism is imagined, formalistic and abstract, requiring not that man change himself or his way of life, but only worship and daily prayer. Hieromonk Job (Gumerov) submitted by Yurii_S_Kh to SophiaWisdomOfGod [link] [comments] |
2024.05.19 14:05 Mammoth_Register927 He broke up with me 4 years ago, rightfully so. Now it's 4 years later, he lives together with his new girlfriend, and I haven't met anyone that comes close to how good he was. I've bettered myself in every way, and now I'm grieving that he will never get to see the new me
The title pretty much says it all. I met him when I was 19 and I wasn't ready for a relationship, like he was (he was 24). I acted distant and cold throughout the whole relationship to keep him at a safe distance. Ofcourse I had moments where I wasn't cold, but he definitely gave more energy to the relationship from the beginning until the end. I couldn't let myself be vulnerable. Eventually, things escalated, and I impulsively broke up with him. We "made up" and a few days later he broke up with me. He said he was very in love with me but he couldn't be in a relationship that was warfare from the beginning (when you should still be in the honeymoon phase) and he didn't think I was ready (I wasn't).
After we broke up, he messaged me a few weeks later to ask me how I was doing. I was very childish and told him I was going on a date with a potential fwb (I was, but I was definitely telling him hoping that he would react). Then he basically said I could come over to his place aswell, which I interpreted as him wanting to be friends with benefits. I felt very hurt because I was still very much in love with him, and I felt like he was already over me if he was comfortable with the idea of casual sex. It ended in a fight, and eventually he blocked me.
I was blocked for a year. I didn't contact him and he didn't contact me. Eventually, I sent him a letter because I felt bad about how I handled everything. In the letter I said I didn't expect anything back, and that I hoped he found someone that could give him the love he deserved, I just wanted to get it off my chest. He unblocked me, and I noticed from his profile picture that he was dating someone else. He also changed his whole look, tattoo's and all. He said he respected the fact that I sent a letter and that he didn't hold any grudges towards me. We left it at that and never talked again.
That is now 3 years ago. Since then, I've changed a lot as a person. I took a deep look inside, got into therapy, fixed the relationship with my parents, surrounded myself with good people and got a more active social life (back then, I never really left the house lol). My ex always loved to party and he would wish that I was a bit more into that aswell - well, now I am. I became healthier, mentally and physically. I got rid of my acne. I'm weightlifting and doing yoga every day. I got into my masters degree and I'm getting very good grades. I'm getting much more attention from men than I did back then, I like to believe I've had quite a good glowup.
I guess I've been happier than I've ever been, but recently I've been hit by a big wave of sadness. He's still together with the girl from the picture, even living together. Meanwhile, I'm struggling to find someone as good as him. No one I've met so far comes close, and I can say I have tried to put myself out there. I can 100% say I'm ready for the real thing now, but he's not available anymore and it hurts. It hurts that I put so much effort into bettering myself, and he will never get to see how far i've come. It hurts that he is realistically very hard to replace, and I got replaced after a few months.
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2024.05.19 12:50 2AussieWildcats Mother's Day update: starring The Fussiest Mother In Melbourne
We have an overdue update on how Mother's Day went .... some of you may recall this thread ...
https://www.reddit.com/melbourne/comments/1c3kr3d/wanted_restaurant_for_fussiest_mother_in_melbourne/ So we ended up at Botticelli in Brighton, based on several recommendations from fellow Redditors. Thanks to them!
The restaurant had to tick several boxes to try to please The Fussiest Mother In Melbourne (TFMIM), including having oysters kilpatrick and creme brulee on the menu...
Botticelli did a fine job! Her daughter and I were expecting red chequered tablecloths and bottles of chianti in wicker baskets, based on some of the mentions here, but it was nothing like a nostalgia trip.
It was damn near fine dining. But unpretentious - and excellent. Slightly pricey-ish pasta, with seafood and quality steaks. But it was all mostly* excellent. Nice cosy joint, attentive and lovely staff, would actually recommend.
*''Mostly" because you must remember, TFMIM was with us.
Things got off to an edgy start because of an apparent absence of moscato on the wine list, which provoked the early-warning quote of ''I can't believe an Italian restaurant does not offer moscato!'' (a tremendous echo of her legendary ''I cannot believe a Greek restaurant does not offer a prawn cocktail starter!'' to a waitress at Hellenic Republic, uttered in 2019 and verifiable.)
However anxious offspring came to the rescue with a sighting in a somewhat unexpected part of the wine list, and she actually really enjoyed her one glass of moscato. FYI, TFMIM never EVER has more than one glass of wine. Ever. She has never been intoxicated in her life. However her attempts to castigate close and distant family members about the evils of alcohol can very quickly be shot down on the day of her wedding anniversary, when even year 6 maths can deduce that she was actually pregnant when walking down the aisle in virginal white at the turn of the 1970s. She will now often get a gleeful return of fire about the evils of pre-marital sex LOL if she arcs up too much.
Anyway, big tick for wine and for the menu even before any food was ordered - creme brulee, classic gnocchi and oysters kilpatrick were welcomed when spotted, and all and sundry were given a reassuring earful that this strange restaurant might actually be OK after all.
Sadly, the oysters kilpatrick did not please. TFMIM will only eat oysters done this way, and Botticelli failed to in its signature duty to immolate the bacon using a flamethrower for at least 15min, and drown the half shell in Worcestershire sauce.
Such wilful neglect by the kitchen exposes the unwary diner to the ACTUAL TASTE of an oyster, which is never desireable to the mind of TFMIM. She is appalled at even the look of oysters served any other way.
TFMIM ''likes'' oysters (kilpatrick, only) in the same way that 14yr olds ''like" Jack Daniel's (in a 1:50 ratio mix with Coke, in a can, only).
The anti-pasti share platters went down well, until we ran out of the specifically char-grilled bread (5 ravenous diners) and requested more - and it arrived un-charred. TFMIM was a bit miffed and as is her wont, spent 2-3min commenting on that.
But nonetheless it was a smooth transition to the mains. Her husband (78) pronounced his steak one of the best he had ever consumed, and we all loved our pasta and seafood dishes.
TFMIM enjoyed her baked scallops on shell (a starter for her main) but could only manage two not three. A gloriously cheap date. She was clearly saving herself for the creme brulee and (pinching our) sticky date pudding. The former was critiqued as a bit runny, but there was no fault found with the latter.
Overall, we would return to Botticell. TFMIM probably would too, but as it was the first visit to the Brighton shopping strip in about 30yrs for a lifelong Melbourne resident who usually only ventures out of the city for the exotic temptations of Deniliquin in NSW (regular visits to relatives), I wouldn't set your watch by it.
See you at a buffet in the northern suburbs again REAL SOON.....
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2024.05.19 12:17 Neither_Librarian_99 I waited him for years just to end up being a rebound
I tried writing this last night but it got too long so I will try to make it shorter this time.
So in 2017 I was added in a group chat on Facebook. He was in the group chat. I was always the type of friend who would be there for my friends so I reminded them that if they need someone they can talk to me. I hung out often with these people. But individually I wasnât close to anyone(if that makes sense).
He texted me one day asking me for help. He was sure I wasnât going to judge him. I really didnât. After that we kind of got close. We started hanging out individually. he wasnât like the other guys and our bond was special. I hoped to lose him.
Slowly my feelings for him grew. I was in denial because I canât do it. It would ruin the friendship. One night me and that friend group hung out. We âsneakedâ into a nightclub. We were underage but one girl wasnât and you are allowed to go into nightclubs with a family member(or someone who is over 18). We drank a little and the alcohol got us in a flirty mood. he started flirting with me and I flirted back. Somehow after this we kept on flirting as a joke. my mind didnât accept this is a joke even though it was.
My feelings got more intense when he started talking to a girl. I was helping him still because I was still in denial. They got together and since it was a long distance relationship it was all good but it was long distance but when they met things got toxic. I wont go into details but we all were telling him to break up with her. When he did I was relieved. We started jokingly flirting again. And planning future. To move in together and have a dog and a cat. Somehow was delusional enough to think that he was being for real even though we both knew it was a joke. I was so hurt how he would rant about how much he misses her the next day.
My world turned around when they got back together. I got physically sick and that night I realised I was in love. I was hoping for them to break up so i could make him fall for me. Long story short his relationship with that girl was on and off. Every time it was off(breaking up) I would have hopes and at this point I was the one who flirted the most and I was being for real.
The relationship lasted 2 years and half. After they broke up for real I had a feeling it was over. Around the time I tried to make him forget about her and I tried to prove him that he is loved(without confessing). I was so jealous when he told me that many girls confessed to him that they like him and they were waiting for him to break up with his ex. He started fucking around(although I would say that he isnât as bad as most of the guys because his body count is not a double number). I was still trying to make him fall for me.
One night we went to a nightclub again with his friends. We both got a little drunk and flirty. Sober me would be too shy to sit on his lap. This was the first time we got touchy. I was too confident. I donât remember what we were saying before we kissed but I was so happy. I was in the mood so I started teasing him but he stopped me because I was drunk. I told him that Iâve been waiting for years for this to happen and Iâm sure. But that night things ended here.
The next day we talked about it and I couldnât hide the fact that I was waiting for him for years. We decided to give it a try. I was so happy. Happy and in love. It was like a dream come true.
Everything was perfect besides from when I initiated sex he would reject me because he wants my first time to be special. I told him that it will be special because itâs going to be with him. He said that we canât do it yet. And I was weirded out. Why?
One night I was too curious and I decided to do something I would never do. I went through his phone. And I found out something that broke my heart. he was texting his friends about how much he loves me but he misses his ex. His friends were calling him stupid for missing a bitch who cheated on him and used him and manipulated him. He opened up about how he doesnât want to have sex with me because he doesnât think that it would be fair to me my first time should be special. I felt so heartbroken.
In the morning I told him that I know he misses his ex and we got an argument about how I went through his phone without his consent but then he apologised to me. We ended things and my biggest fear came true. I lost him. Itâs been six months but itâs still hurts.
So guys please donât wait for someone for years. Donât wait for someone who is in a relationship. Donât the guy who got out of a relationship less than a year ago. Donât make my mistakes.
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2024.05.19 12:15 CursedCroissantYo 21 [M4F] just giving this a shot
Thought Iâd give this another go, Reddit isnât exactly the most ideal place to find love lol but couldnât hurt to throw something out there.
Iâm a 21 year old guy from Texas, although Iâd like to move someday possibly to another country. My hobbies include writing songs & poetry, working out, skateboarding, basketball, MMA, & watching true crime stuff & stuff about real life mysteries.
What I want in a girlfriend is someone who is loyal, I believe cheaters never deserve a second chance. Also honesty, be your true self so the love is real. But also just someone I feel a connection with, who I can have deep conversations with, be stupid with & just have fun, someone that I can support all their dreams & goals as they do the same for me.
Please donât message me if you just want sex or get bored after a day. Iâm not here for a fling, I date with the intention of being together forever
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2024.05.19 12:00 AutoModerator Weekly Reminder: Rules and FAQ - May 19, 2024 (Now with updates!)
Below you will find a weekly reminder of our
Rules and partial
FAQ. It's definitely a long read, but it's worth your time, especially if you are new to the community, or dropping by as a result of a link you found elsewhere. We periodically revise our rules, this weekly notice will help keep you informed of any changes made.
NOTE: These rules are guidelines. Some moderation discretion is to be expected. 1. Kindness Matters
Advise, don't criticize. - Post with empathy, thoughtfulness, and constructive commentary rather than judgment. Don't be an asshole.
- Name-calling, slurs (including gender or race based slurs), and insults towards other community members will not be tolerated. Do not attack others for their personally held values, custody situation, marital status, physical distance from stepkids, or economic status; or on the basis of race, sex, sexual orientation, age, religion, or ethnicity.
- No name-calling toward children, including the above-mentioned insults or the term "skids", or terms such as "mini-wife" or "mini-husband."
- Comments advocating spanking or any mention of wanting to harm children are not allowed.
- This is a support sub, not a judgement sub, assholes are not tolerated. Comments with terms used in other subs to pass judgement on assholes will be removed.
2. No Drama
This is a support sub. - Bickering, nitpicking, and thread derailment will not be tolerated and will be subject to removal at moderator discretion.
- Do not repeatedly badger a poster demanding answers, or refuse to acknowledge an answer that's already been given.
- Do not use sensitive issues from past posts (either from this sub or other subs) to attack another user, as we are all discussing vulnerable topics.
- Crossposting anything from /stepparents to any other subreddit might result in a ban and may result in the original thread being locked. Brigading our sub will result in an immediate ban.
3. Report, Donât Rant
No backseat modding. - If you see someone breaking the rules, report the post or comment to the mods rather than engaging them in an argument. Failure to do so may be subject to comment removal at moderator discretion.
- No meta posts complaining about rude comments, DMs, or general sub issues.
- If you think someone is a troll or previously banned user, either use the report function or message the mods to direct their attention to the issue.
4. No Naming & Shaming
No userpings or links. - Tagging/pinging users or other subreddits in an attempt to bully, harass, or complain will not be tolerated. Do not tag other subs, ever.
- If you want to complain about another subreddit being hostile to stepparents, do not name the subreddit. "Other parenting/advice/judgement subs" will suffice.
5. No Platitudes
Nobody knew what they were getting into. - Comments like "You knew what you were getting into", "Love them, love their kids!", "They're a package deal!" and "You have to love them like your own!" will be removed.
- Comments suggesting that OP is not cut out for stepparenting will be removed at moderator discretion.
- Comments like "This is just a part of parenting, deal with it!" will be removed at moderator discretion.
6. No Trolling
We have zero tolerance for trolls. - This is a support sub. Our subscribers do not have the time, nor inclination, to provide support to internet trolls. Posts that are suspected to be trolling attempts will be immediately removed, and the poster banned.
- Concern trolling, devil's advocating, gish-galloping, sealioning, and general asshattery are subject to immediate removal and banning without warning or notice.
- Any attempt to circumvent the ban by creating a new username will be reported to reddit admins and possibly result in account suspension.
7. No Personally Identifiable Information
Use discretion when posting. - We highly recommend using a separate account for support subs to help prevent being doxxed. Do not post any information that may allow others to figure out your identity.
- Do not post photos of children, or any other photo that could be used to identify you or another user on the sub.
- Any image that contains a name or other identifying information should have the name or identifying information blurred out. This includes drawings, notes, and screenshots.
- Do not link to social media or any articles/blogs where you or another user on the sub is mentioned by name.
8. No More than 2 Posts per 24 hours
Use the daily threads. - We are not a huge sub, but we are no longer a small sub. If you have multiple grievances to air, use the daily discussion threads instead of multiple posts.
Remember the human. - Adhere to the same standards of behavior online that you follow in real life.
- Read it in full here.
- Downvoting is reserved for comments that donât contribute, and shouldn't be used to indicate disagreement.
- If you believe someone is in violation of the subreddit rules, please either use the report function or message the mods to direct their attention to the issue.
- Suspected brigading will be reported to reddit admins.
10. No Porn, Spam, Blogs, or Research Studies/Surveys Without Mod Approval
Just don't. - This is a SFW subreddit. Posting pornography will result in immediate post removal and permanent ban.
- Advertising on the subreddit (outside of Reddit's own advertising) is not allowed.
- No personal blog posts are allowed without express moderator permission.
- No advertising without prior mod approval.
- No asking for money/posting fundraisers/etc.
- For links to parenting research studies or surveys, please message the mods for permission before posting.
11. Disputes in Modmail Only
Don't argue with the mods on the sub. - Any issues specifically related to how a mod is moderating should be addressed to the full moderating team via mod mail. This ensures that all mods are aware of any concerns and prevents disintegration of the topic thread at hand.
- This means to do not message or send chat requests to individual mods. All discussion and complaints about mod actions need to be done in mod mail ONLY. Failure to follow this rule can result in an immediate permanent ban.
- Comments in threads asking about mod decisions are subject to removal without notice.
12. Moderator Actions
We aren't kidding. - Users are expected to know the rules before posting. If you are warned or banned for violating the rules, ignorance is not an excuse.
- Moderators will remove posts and comments and/or lock threads in accordance with the rules above. Typically this happens when threads have gone off-topic in a way that is not productive for the OP, or comments overall have become contentious or disrespectful.
- If a poster continues to argue or to willfully violate these rules, temporary and permanent ban procedures will be followed. Any attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban. User bans will not be discussed in the sub. Questions posted about user bans are subject to removal and the poster subject to warning/ban procedures. The mod team will not discuss a specific user ban with anyone other than the user involved.
- New accounts are subject to manual approval until they are no longer deemed "new" by the mod team. This helps to weed out trolls and ban evaders.
- We rely on Automoderator to scan for specific words and phrases that are not welcome here and notify the mod team to review the comment or post. This includes slurs of any type and platitudes such as "Love them as your own!"
- The mod team uses a combination of blacklisting and banning when dealing with trolls.
- We employ the use of a bot that automatically bans anyone who comments in subs that have historically harassed our users. If you are picked up by the bot for telling trolls to get fucked, reach out via mod mail and we'll get you sorted out.
- The rules above as well as ban procedures are considered guidelines only; some deviation may be necessary on a case by case basis and/or at the mod team's discretion.
13. Ban Procedure
These actions are at moderator discretion. - Pornography will result in an automatic permanent ban.
- Extremely egregious content will result in an immediate permanent ban.
- You may receive a 7 or 30 day temporary ban for first and second rule violations, depending upon severity.
- Continued rule violations will result in a permanent ban.
- Willful attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban.
- We recognize the reddit site-wide rules of using alt names to get around bans and will ban those as well as report them to reddit admins.
- Shortest version? Don't be an asshole. People come here for support and advice, they do not come here to be yelled at or told they are the reason everything is going sideways. There are ways to point out that someone may want to do some reflection on their own actions and reactions without being an asshole about it.
- The purpose of this subreddit is to provide support and a sense of belonging for struggling stepparents. We aren't here to pass judgement, but rather to offer support, empathy, and constructive commentary. That does not include "hard truths" or "tough love." Stepparents get enough of that in every other subreddit, we're not passing it out here. Be respectful.
- Remember, most people aren't going to come to a sub like this when everything is going great and everyone is getting along. People are coming here when they are down, when they are feeling defeated and stretched to the limit. Kicking someone when they are down is shitty behavior and we don't tolerate it.
What about being kind to the kids?
- "Won't somebody think of the children?" Pearl clutching isn't needed here. If you read the Kindness Matters rule closely, you will see that there is a clause in there about name calling children. We don't allow it. We also don't allow people rolling in telling OP that they feel sorry for their stepkids because OP is feeling overwhelmed and overloaded.
- If anyone is advocating slapping, spanking, or any other form of violence, report the comment immediately. We do not advocate violence towards children of any sort. The mod team does not advocate any sort of physical punishment at any time.
- Venting about behaviors is not the same as insulting the kids. However, if you see a post or comment where kids are being name called or dragged to the point of no return, use the report button. We try to catch the posts and remove them before they hit the sub, but we cannot see every comment without your help. Use the report button to bring problematic comments to our attention. Don't engage in a war of words on our subreddit.
Why is this sub such an echo chamber?
- Not allowing contributors to pile on and tell OP that they are a terrible human being who should never be around children does not equate to being an echo chamber. Many contributors here will offer OP suggestions to help them work through their resentments and frustrations, and the most egregious situations are called out. We simply ask that it be called out with respect.
- If you feel that a post is simply too much for you to handle without following the rules, move on to another post.
- If you believe that a post itself is crossing the rules report it. If the mod team has approved the post, it is because the mod team believes that the OP needs help from the community or needs a moment to vent and move on from their vent. That does not give you license to pile on disrespectfully. Unless it is proven that OP is a bot, assume that OP is a human being with real thoughts and feelings and has posted from a place of vulnerability.
Why can't I tell OP that they are an asshole?
- Because this isn't a judgement sub. We aren't AITA, we don't want to be AITA.
- Comments with terms like YTA, NTA, ESH, NAH will be removed.
- Don't start your posts with INFO either. We generally recognize that as a fishing attempt for more information to pass judgement on OP, and again, we are not a judgment sub.
But OP asked if they were an asshole?!
- Their post somehow got past our automoderator. Just use the report button. We will address it with OP.
- If you've asked if you are an asshole, a-hole, a*hole, a**hole, whatever, don't be surprised if your post is removed without warning. This isn't a judgment sub. If you want judgment, you know where to go.
What is a gendered slur?
- While it seems that everyone understands what racist slurs are, people struggle understanding the concept of gendered slurs. Generally speaking, we are talking about derogatory nouns or verbs that are used to negatively describe people or situations based on gendered terms.
- We've gone back and forth on this a few times, and the truth is, we get it, it's your safe space and you want to be able to vent about BM/BD how you want to vent about them, without us telling you how to vent about them. Fair enough. Vent away. What we are going to stick to here how people are referring to other users and to stepchildren.
- Examples that are not allowed:
- "My SD is such a little bitch."
- "She dresses/acts like a slut."
- "My SS acts like a pussy."
- "My SS is such a beta male."
- "You are all fucking whores."
- "Any dude who is raising some sluts kids is a cuck!"
- "Little Lord Fauntleroy over here thinking he runs the house!"
- "You're just the bangnanny, get used to it."
- Don't call users here names, don't call stepchildren names.
- Masking the term with asterisks or other neat little tricks might get you around the bot, but if we see it, we're removing it and quite possibly giving you a time out. The intended word is still there and you deliberately tried to skate the rule.
- As there is not enough space to list every term that is offensive and does not belong, nor every situation in which term or phrase may be allowable in context, this rule is enforced based on moderator discretion.
Seriously? You are the language police now?
- We're here to talk about stepparenting. And we would like for that to happen in a respectful way. Attacking each other doesn't help. Belittling stepchildren draws in trolls who don't understand your frustration, all they see is an evil stepmonster talking shit on the internet about a poor, innocent baby. Yes, even if that "poor, innocent baby" just robbed you blind and set fire to the house on their way out the door. That's just how it goes.
- We are aware that this is a relatively new rule and a lot of older posts and comments contain a lot of problematic language, including some from mods themselves. We are growing and evolving, and rules change as the sub grows and evolves.
What does No Drama really mean?
- Pretty much what it says, do not bring drama from other subs into this sub. Do not engage in vote brigades. Do not try to incite other subscribers to riot in a different sub. Don't follow posters into this sub from other subs to continue to harass them. Do not badger someone or derail threads. Do not harass community members because you don't agree with them. There's enough drama in the daily lives of subscribers, more isn't needed.
What is thread derailment?
- When a comment chain has devolved to the point where all you are doing is arguing back and forth with someone about the same thing over and over again, you have derailed the thread. Also known as bickering. It's what children do. We assume if people are in a stepparent role they are adults. We expect you to act like it.
- If you aren't a stepparent, or in a stepparenting role, consider that perhaps this subreddit isn't for you. If you want to participate, do so with respect. Thread derailment, arguing, bickering, and nitpicking are not allowed.
But what if they didn't answer my question?
- No one has to answer your questions. This is a support sub, not an inquisition. Jumping on a bandwagon with "OP is evading the question" in a 20 comment long chain is the epitome of thread derailment. You'll find more information about trolling below and how this might be considered such.
Why am I being silenced? I'm just asking for a back and forth!
- Thread derailment, badgering, and nitpicking are considered harassment. Continued harassment of either community members or mods will get you banned.
Why can't I look at someone's post history and comment about it?
- No mod in the history of this sub has ever once said post histories are forbidden. What we do frown upon is using someone's post history to attack, belittle, or otherwise harass someone.
- Example Post: "My stepkid's mom really hates me. How can I make this better?"
- Okay: "Based on the timeline and your post history, it looks like this may have started as an affair. Unfortunately there's going to be outstanding issues for a long time due to that. Try focusing on yourself and how you can move forward without worrying about how someone else feels about you."
- Not Okay: "Holy shit! You were the OW! What the hell do you expect, homewrecker?!"
- Example Post: "I am completely overloaded and feeling very down about myself."
- Okay: "In your post history you mentioned that your spouse wasn't really helping around the house. Has that changed at all?"
- Not Okay: "LOL, you already got the answers you need in your post on relationships. You are stupid for sticking with your lazy spouse."
Why can't we crosspost stuff to other subs?
- We can't stop you from doing so. The problem isn't that something has been crossposted, it's when the community that it's been crossposted to feels the need to come over here and harass OP. When we see that happening, we lock the post and start passing out bans. If you did the crossposting, you'll be banned. If you participated in the brigading, you'll be banned.
What if it's my own post?
- Again, we can't stop you from doing so. We prefer that you don't technically crosspost, but rather just copy and paste your post. Why? Because inevitably the above will happen. Redditors from other subs will follow you back to /stepparents and start attacking users here. It just happens.
What is "brigading"?
- Reddit defines vote manipulation and brigading as follows:
- Using multiple accounts, voting services, or any other software to increase or decrease vote scores.
- Asking people to vote up or down certain posts, either on Reddit itself or through social networks, messaging, etc. for personal gain.
- Forming or joining a group that votes together, either on a specific post, a user's posts, posts from a domain, etc.
- We, along with pretty much every other subreddit that has ever had to deal with this nonsense, further define brigading as this: You saw a post on another sub that linked to our sub either via a link in a comment or a crosspost. It was basically saying something along the lines of "OMG, check out these assholes over on /stepparents! They literally hate all their stepkids!" And then you and your friends come over and start hammering on OP and telling OP how much they suck. Congrats, you have just participated in a brigade.
- If you see a post or comment that breaks the rules, instead of engaging, report it. When you report it, it sends notification to the mod team. We will act on it where appropriate. Engaging with bad faith users may result in your comments being removed. If you repeatedly do so, you may end up being banned.
What if I see an obvious troll?
What if they are being really mean in comments?
What if they are harassing me in private messages?
- Step 1: Report them to admins. You can report harassment to reddit by using this link or send a DM to reddit admins. Include the link to the DM, admins can see your inbox and providing a direct link is helpful for them to weed out bad actors.
- Step 2: Block the person so they cannot directly contact you again.
- Step 3: Send us a mod mail and let the mod team know. Tell us who they are and what they said, send us a screenshot if you can - admins can see your DMs, mods can't. We'll take action where necessary by banning from the sub if they aren't already banned.
- Just as we prefer to not be linked to or crossposted from, we do not allow linking to or calling out other subs by name. If you see something you want to share, say it's a hot post that has hit the front page and a stepparent is being absolutely flayed, just refer to it as "that hot post that hit the front page." If you want to complain about other places in general, "other parenting/advice/judgement subs" will suffice. Absolutely under no circumstances should you link to anywhere else.
I can't link to other subs?
- Do not directly link to another sub. (e.g.: "/insertsubnamehere is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")
- Do not name other subs. (e.g.: "I won't link to it directly, but insertsubnamehere is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")
- Do not abbreviate other subs. (e.g.: "I know that ISNH is ridiculously hostile to stepparents!")
I can't ping other users?
- Do not summon another user with a username ping/tag. (e.g.: "insertusernamehere was being an asshole.")
- If you are agreeing with someone, it is okay to link to them. (e.g.: "I agree with insertusernamehere, you need to take a couple of steps back and reflect on this.")
- Sanctimonious, overused clichés that grossly oversimplify the stepparenting experience are neither wanted nor allowed here. We have all heard it a thousand times before, we don't need to hear it again. It's not nearly as insightful and wise as some would like to think.
Why don't you people understand it's a package deal?
- Any comment that suggests that OP should have known what they were getting involved with, or that they needed to understand that the kids were part of some package they needed to accept before signing up for marriage is subject to immediate removal.
- This is one of the most insensitive things you can say to a stepparent. Most stepparents were aware of the children, but they were probably not aware of all of the family dynamics.
Why can't you just love them like they are your own?
- Demanding that a stranger you do not know love children that are not biologically theirs as if they were theirs can be incredibly damaging to someone who is already in a vulnerable situation. Any comment that falls along these lines will be removed.
What do you mean by No Trolling? I was just...
- No means no. No trolling. No pretending to be a stepparent and then whipping out the Greatest Hits Bingo Card of The Worst Stepparent in the History of Stepparents. We see you. We've seen you a thousand times.
What does "concern trolling", "gish-galloping", and "sealioning" have to do with stepparenting? This isn't a debate sub, why are you using debate terms?
- That's absolutely right, this isn't a debate sub. And yet, here we are, day after day, having to defend ourselves against this sort of thing. So, enough. No more. Usage of any of these things will get you banned.
What is "Concern Trolling?"
- A concern troll is someone who disingenuously visits sites of an opposing ideology to disrupt conversation by offering unwanted advice on how to solve problems which do not really exist.
- Example Post: OP expresses concern that she will feel, and possibly act, differently towards her stepchildren after her husband decides that no, he doesn't want anymore children after all.
- Example Concern Troll pulled from actual mod mail after their comment was removed: "Possible child abuse claims need to be sorted out well before whatever empathy you believe the OP was looking for."
What is a "Devil's Advocate"?
- "I'm just playing devil's advocate here, but have you considered that maybe BM is just really tired and needs a break, too?" BM has dozens of different mom based subs alone on reddit she can complain on, this sub is for stepparents. The stepparent doesn't need to consider that maybe BM is just really tired and needs a break.
"Gish-galloping?" What does that even mean?
- The Gish Gallop is the fallacious debate tactic of drowning your opponent in a flood of individually-weak arguments in order to prevent rebuttal of the whole argument collection without great effort. The Gish Gallop is a conveyor belt-fed version of the on the spot fallacy, as it's unreasonable for anyone to have a well-composed answer immediately available to every argument present in the Gallop.
And "sealioning?" What's that?
- Sealioning involves jumping into a conversation with endless polite, reasonable questions and demands for answers, usually of entry-level topics far below the actual conversation (e.g. "please prove sexism exists"). This tactic differs little from harassment; instead of discussion, the point is to derail discussion, receive criticism (for their ignorance) so as to look like a victim, or to make someone feel overwhelmed and quit talking.
Who gets to define what is considered asshattery?
- The mod team, of course! If we feel that comments are out of line, are trolling, are leading up to a fight or "just asking questions", we are going to remove them and most likely ban the offender.
Posting Guidelines for Stepparents
- Body text is required, we suggest you use line breaks between paragraphs as a wall of text is difficult to read. Posts that have only a title are likely to be removed. Instead of using names (even fictitious ones), try to use the sub acronyms. It helps our users to follow along if you use the acronyms and not names.
- Assign a post flair that accurately describes what your post is about and what you are seeking. If you are posting an update from a previous post, include a link to that post.
- Flairs are applied to posts to determine what a person is looking for. When submitting a new post, you should choose a flair that specifies if you are looking for advice, support, etc. The following link flair is available and is color coded with side bar links so that you can search by flair:
- Advice - For when you are specifically asking for advice or help.
- Announcement - Mod Use Only, for subreddit announcements.
- Daily (Formerly TTP) - Mod Use Only, for our daily discussion threads.
- Discussion - A little advice, a little "How does your family handle this?"
- JustBMThings - Pretty sure this is self explanatory!
- Legal - Asking for legal advice? Tag it with this!
- Miscellany - Just a sort of off topic thing? Use this tag.
- Resource - Sharing a good resource or asking for one? This is the tag you need!
- Support - For those days when you want nothing but a good old fashioned cry and some community love.
- Update - Updating us on something that you posted about previously? Use this one!
- Vent - We all need to vent sometimes. Respect the tag as a vent. This isn't how OP talks all day every day.
- Win! - Celebrate those wins with us with this tag!
- Megathread - Mod Use Only, for large mega threads (typically around major calendar events.)
Posting Guidelines for Bioparents
- Stepparents is a support community for stepparents, by stepparents. As bioparents, you may want to have more insight into how the stepparent in your life feels or thinks. You may have questions on how to ease the transition for your partner. However, please keep in mind that this community was not created for you. It was created for your partner or your ex's partner. If you are seeking support on how to deal with a stepparent, there are other subs more suited for your situation and your post is subject to removal.
- There are some posts from bioparents we will accept:
- Seeking advice on how to support your partner as they navigate stepparenting
- Seeking resources to help you better support your partner
- Seeking resources for your partner
- There are some posts from bioparents we will not accept:
- Complaints about how the stepparent is too involved in your kids lives
- Vents about how the stepparent is not involved enough in your kids lives
- "Cautionary tales" advising stepparents to back off
- Seeking advice on how to tell the stepparent to back off
- The Do's and Dont's of Stepparenting
- How your kid's stepmom is literally The Worst
- Comments from bioparents that are helpful and supportive are welcome and appreciated. Comments from bioparents that are not helpful or supportive are not welcome and subject to removal. There are several other subs that may meet the needs of bioparents better than we can. We recommend /coparenting, /parenting, /parents, /blendedfamilies, and /singleparents as starting points.
Guidelines for Stepkids
- At this time, we do not generally accept posts from stepkids. Comments from stepkids that are helpful and supportive are welcome and appreciated. Comments from stepkids that are not helpful or supportive are not welcome and subject to removal. If you are a stepkid seeking support, we highly recommend /stepkids. It is a very supportive community specifically for stepkids. We also recommend /blendedfamilies as another potential group for support.
What the heck are all these acronyms? I'm confused!
Why aren't my posts or comments showing up?
- New posters and accounts go through a waiting period before their posts will show in the sub and the comments on posts automatically. During the new account approval period the mod team will check posts to be sure you aren't attempting to circumvent a ban with a shiny new account. Please be patient while the timer runs down on your "new" status and the mod team approves your posts and responses.
Why was my comment removed?
- Comments are removed when they do not follow the rules of the sub. These rules are published in several places for your reading pleasure.
- Comments are removed at moderator discretion. In some cases your comment may be removed while another remains up. If you find this to be the case, and you believe the comment to be violating the rules, instead of arguing with mods or demanding they remove the additional comments, just report it.
This comment/post is really offensive! Why is it still up?
- All moderators are volunteers and have busy real lives. Sometimes things get past us. The best thing you can do is report anything you find offensive or inflammatory. It's the quickest and most reliable way of alerting us to an issue.
I've received a hurtful/unwanted PM from someone about my recent post. What should I do?
- If you receive an unwanted/hurtful PM from a name you don't recognize, please report it to Reddit Admins using our handy pre-populated form. Be sure to include the permalink to the message. We've been dealing with a few unhappy folks who like to attack stepparents, and reporting it to the admins is the only way to make it stop.
What are the general moderator guidelines?
- Users are expected to know the rules before posting. If you are warned or banned for violating the rules, ignorance is not an excuse.
- Moderators will remove posts and comments and/or lock threads in accordance with the rules above. Typically this happens when threads have gone off-topic in a way that is not productive for the OP, or comments overall have become contentious or disrespectful.
- If a poster continues to argue or to willfully violate these rules, temporary and permanent ban procedures will be followed. Any attempts to avoid or bypass temporary bans will result in a permanent ban. User bans will not be discussed in the sub. Questions posted about user bans are subject to removal and the poster subject to warning/ban procedures. The mod team will not discuss a specific user ban with anyone other than the user involved.
- New accounts are subject to manual approval until they are no longer deemed "new" by the mod team. This helps to weed out trolls and ban evaders.
- We rely on Automoderator to scan for specific words and phrases that are not welcome here and notify the mod team to review the comment or post. This includes slurs of any type and platitudes such as "Love them as your own!"
- The mod team uses a combination of blacklisting and banning when dealing with trolls.
- We employ the use of a bot that automatically bans anyone who comments in subs that have historically harassed our users. If you are picked up by the bot for telling trolls to get fucked, reach out via mod mail and we'll get you sorted out.
- The rules above as well as ban procedures are considered guidelines only; some deviation may be necessary on a case by case basis and/or at the mod team's discretion.
I've been wrongly banned/Why can't I comment here?
Why was I banned without warning?
- There are numerous reasons that the mod team might opt to move perm banning without warning. Message the moderators if you have specific questions.
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2024.05.19 11:55 Ill_Adhesiveness317 Moving forward how?
I (32f) struggle with moving forward from a guy (30m) I had a 3mo fwb with, it ended 4m ago, ended due to I fell in love and he was not ready, reasoning not getting over his ex. Met him on tinder. We reconnected a few times in between he wanted to have sex, I told him to reach back when he is ready for the real thing including 3 weeks ago, where he was still not ready. Now he is dating someone seriously, told me that I was just too much drama... that why I didnt date others? Didnt cause it didnt seem fair to me, if I am not over him. I feel bad and sad...
What is the best strategy to recover? Otherwise I think I am normal, have a good job, I regulary work out, I look nice
submitted by
Ill_Adhesiveness317 to
dating_advice [link] [comments]
2024.05.19 11:53 zjpxqwfvbk_827030 (COMMENTâŹïž) addict POV on slut Deepthroat Sarabxby, Blowjob Tits more and BBC Pussy videos Natural Dick your Onlyfans Booty
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www.redgifs.com/watch/untidywryalpaca submitted by
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2024.05.19 11:51 mikozodav I ruin everything.
What the fuck, like how the fuck am I supposed to live and get anything "meaningful" done when I keep failing at EVERYTHING. I can't fucking have anything nice either, can't have alcohol, can't have sugar, can't have a fucking cup of coffee since every fucking thing throws my fucking stability out the window, and then I'm ready shoot myself in the head. Never mind the fuckinf hell that is being born with female organs and having to deal with being a sex thing for literally every other human on the internet, to which I'm addicted to, since I don't have think I have real friends either.
I fucking hate my life. Wish I was born a boy.
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http://activeproperty.pl/