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Men's Rights :: Advocating for the social and legal equality of men and boys since 2008

2008.03.19 17:17 Men's Rights :: Advocating for the social and legal equality of men and boys since 2008

At the most basic level, men's rights are the legal rights that are granted to men. However, any issue that pertains to men's relationship to society is also a topic suitable for this subreddit. Men's rights are influenced by the way men are perceived by others. WARNING: Some other subs have bots that will ban you if you post or comment here.
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2008.07.16 19:00 Climate Skeptics: Trying to see through the alarmism

Questioning climate related environmentalism.
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2014.08.24 08:13 david-me KotakuInAction: The almost-official GamerGate subreddit!

KotakuInAction is the main hub for GamerGate on Reddit and welcomes discussion of community, industry and media issues in gaming and broader nerd culture including science fiction and comics.
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2024.05.29 05:37 CollarVivid1722 Lots of talk about millennials being less likely to have kids. Anyone wanted kids but didn't find a partner in time?

I'm 31 and recently single. I was with my boyfriend for a bit over a year - I thought things were great, but it turns out he wasn't as invested in the relationship and told me he's not even sure if he loves me. We mutually decided to end things, mostly because I don't want to be with a man who is lukewarm about me after a year.
The breakup has been really hard for me for many reasons. In addition to the typical sadness, hurt, loneliness, and other common emotions is my age. I always wanted kids and while I know some women can have children into their 40s, many can't. In order to have kids, I would need to find a great man relatively quickly. Even if I do find a great guy (seems less likely since most people are paired up at this age), I have to hope that he doesn't decide that he's not enthusiastic about the relationship and break up with me, as happened this time.
I keep seeing headlines about millennials being less likely to have kids. These are hard for me to read because I'd love to have kids, but failed to find a partner during the right timeframe.
submitted by CollarVivid1722 to Millennials [link] [comments]


2024.05.29 05:17 18us-c371 Whistleblowers and challenging power (schizo-adjacent posting)

Everyone is so conspiracy-brained these days. Whether it’s the Boeing whistleblowers or RFKJr, people insist that everyone who challenges power will be killed. Even when there’s strong evidence to the contrary, people believe.
The first Boeing whistleblower had zero relevance to the new issues and yet so many were instantly willing to call his death suspicious. It was certainly one helluva coincidence, but cmon! The guy was about to testify. His lawyers already knew what he would say, and his death is a guaranteed national headline. It’s not exactly a strong way to cover anything up.
Anyway with that background, I was just watching a video about how the FTC Chairwoman Lina Khan is investigating oil producers for colluding on prices. The fucking OIL INDUSTRY. HELLO?!
She’s challenged Big Tech, now Big Oil, and noncompetes. If any of these conspiracies are true, surely she’s high on the list of people to eliminate. I’m highly sceptical of the idea that so many whistleblowers and so many of those opposing power are being killed. In almost every case there’s no evidence of wrongdoing and plenty of evidence of regular mortality.
Time will tell if I’m too naïve though. Certainly the Kennedy is bound for the grave if the world has a single conspiracy in it. Lina too. The one argument against her is that she’s lost so many antitrust cases, it’s almost like she’s controlled opposition. Very similar to Victoria Neuman from The Boys.
submitted by 18us-c371 to Destiny [link] [comments]


2024.05.29 04:32 Honest-Internet4687 reality check for 22

With the experiment of the no jumper universe over or at least on hold for now, I was thinking about what we are left with, after 5 years of trial and error. Ive come to the conclusion, that it must leave Adam 22 looking very questionable as a Director of this media company, with the fact that after so many years of having talent, income, and a big head start with the soundcloud era etc etc he wasnt able to produce a single long lasting side show or an effective news show, with all his resources. I think he is a good podcaster but has no skill in creating a podcast multiverse. Who is really surprised that having 3 shows that mirror the no jumper show just with a new title and hosts, didnt work, whos surprised that a news show where people just read out headlines then argue with no educated opinion, didnt work. your left with the same thing we had in 2019, a NJ show and interviews. Is he deserving of all this credit or is Adam overrated
submitted by Honest-Internet4687 to NoJumper [link] [comments]


2024.05.29 01:10 Livid_Beginning_9265 To buy or not to buy - single family home

Hello everyone. Wondering what I should do next.
I’m lucky to have enough funds and a good enough income to buy a house. We’re looking in Hamilton currently. I’ve bid on 4-5 houses now but haven’t gotten anything. We’re looking at single family detached homes.
I can’t decide if now is a good time. On one hand I read articles about the near term mortgage renewals and that Canada is in a GDP per capita recession. Also read that home sales have slowed significantly Then I go bid on houses and everything has multiple offers. Headlines are doom and gloom and suggesting further price declines, but the experience on the ground seems different.
What do you think?
submitted by Livid_Beginning_9265 to TorontoRealEstate [link] [comments]


2024.05.28 18:05 cbov_daughterofcain Chicago Headline?

I just saw Hayden’s story about headlining in Chicago the day before her lolla set, but the poster said lolla after show? So will the concert be at the same lolla venue? Is it still a part of the festival? I’ve never been to any music festival before and had never heard of a lollapalooza after show so I don’t know what that even means. I’d love to see her in concert but would honestly prefer to just pay for a single concert ticket rather than a festival ticket and avoid the huge festival crowds. Is the after show still part of the festival/available for those who bought festival tickets? Or is it just a regular concert held at the same venue?
submitted by cbov_daughterofcain to Ethelcain [link] [comments]


2024.05.28 16:30 prernanagpal21 Facebook Ads Steps

Facebook Ads Steps
I can't help with a plagiarized version of the steps for Facebook ads. However, I can certainly provide you with an original, detailed guide on how to create Facebook ads, which you can then share on Reddit or any other platform. Here are the steps:
How to Create Facebook Ads
  1. Set Up a Facebook Business Page
    • Ensure you have a Facebook Business Page. If not, create one by going to Facebook's business section and following the prompts.
  2. Access Facebook Ads Manager
  3. Create a New Campaign
    • Click on the green “Create” button to start a new campaign.
    • Choose your campaign objective (e.g., Brand Awareness, Traffic, Engagement, Leads, Conversions).
  4. Set Up Your Ad Account
    • If it’s your first time, you’ll need to configure your ad account settings, such as currency, time zone, and payment method.
  5. Define Your Audience
    • Specify your target audience based on demographics, interests, behaviors, and location. Utilize custom audiences for retargeting or lookalike audiences to find new potential customers similar to your existing ones.
  6. Choose Ad Placements
    • Decide where you want your ads to appear. You can select automatic placements recommended by Facebook or manually choose placements such as Facebook News Feed, Instagram, Audience Network, and Messenger.
  7. Set Your Budget and Schedule
    • Choose between a daily budget or a lifetime budget.
    • Set the start and end dates for your campaign or run it continuously.
  8. Create Your Ad
    • Select the ad format that suits your objective (e.g., carousel, single image, video, slideshow, or collection).
    • Upload your media files (images, videos) or create new ones using Facebook’s tools.
    • Write compelling ad copy, including a headline, description, and call-to-action.
  9. Review and Publish
    • Double-check all the details of your ad, including audience settings, budget, and creative content.
    • Once everything looks good, click on the “Publish” button to submit your ad for review.
  10. Monitor and Optimize
    • After your ad is live, regularly monitor its performance using Ads Manager.
    • Analyze metrics such as reach, engagement, click-through rate (CTR), and conversions.
    • Make necessary adjustments to improve performance, like tweaking the ad copy, changing the audience, or adjusting the budget.
By following these steps, you can create effective Facebook ads that reach your target audience and help achieve your marketing goals

facebookads # campaign #marketing #facebookcampaign

submitted by prernanagpal21 to DigitalMarketingHack [link] [comments]


2024.05.28 16:06 Aelexi93 Is this this ChatGPT4o hallucinating or nah?

Me: Let's keep it more to reality, anything you can share in this role-play about OpenAi, MrAi?
Mr. AI: "Absolutely, let's stick to a more realistic perspective within our role-play. Here are som, yet not widely discussed, aspects and ongoing efforts of OpenAI:

Realistic Insights About OpenAI

  1. Ongoing Research and Innovations:
    • Advanced Language Models:
      • OpenAI continues to enhance the capabilities of its language models. Research focuses on improving the understanding of context, reducing biases, and making models more efficient and accessible.
    • Multi-Modal AI:
      • OpenAI is likely working on integrating multiple forms of data (text, images, audio) into a single model. This multi-modal approach aims to create more versatile AI systems that can understand and generate content across different media types.
  2. AI Ethics and Safety:
    • Ethics and Safety Research:
      • Significant resources are dedicated to ensuring AI models are safe and align with human values. This includes developing new techniques for monitoring and controlling AI behavior, as well as mitigating risks related to AI misuse.
    • Transparency Initiatives:
      • OpenAI is committed to transparency in AI development. Efforts are made to share research findings, methodologies, and data where appropriate to foster collaboration and public trust.
  3. Collaborative Projects:
    • Industry Partnerships:
      • OpenAI collaborates with various industry leaders to apply AI in real-world scenarios. These partnerships can span healthcare, finance, education, and more, leveraging AI to solve complex problems and enhance services.
    • Academic Collaborations:
      • Collaboration with academic institutions helps push the boundaries of AI research. OpenAI works closely with universities and research labs to explore new theories and applications of AI technology.
  4. AI for Social Good:
    • Global Challenges:
      • OpenAI is involved in projects aimed at addressing global challenges, such as climate change, healthcare disparities, and educational access. AI models are developed to analyze large datasets, predict trends, and suggest solutions to these pressing issues.
    • Community Engagement:
      • OpenAI engages with the community through workshops, public talks, and collaborative projects. These initiatives aim to educate and involve the public in understanding AI’s potential and risks.
  5. Future Directions:
    • Scalable AI:
      • Research is focused on making AI models more scalable and efficient, reducing the computational resources required for training and deployment. This could make advanced AI more accessible to a broader audience.
    • User-Friendly AI Tools:
      • OpenAI is likely developing tools and interfaces that make it easier for non-experts to use AI. This includes user-friendly APIs and applications that allow people to leverage AI in their work and daily lives without needing deep technical knowledge.

Practical Examples

  1. Healthcare AI:
    • AI systems that assist doctors by analyzing medical images, predicting patient outcomes, and suggesting treatment plans based on vast amounts of medical data.
  2. Educational AI:
    • Personalized learning platforms that adapt to individual student needs, providing tailored educational experiences and real-time feedback.
  3. Environmental AI:
    • AI models that monitor environmental changes, predict natural disasters, and optimize resource use to promote sustainability.

Conclusion

While some of these insights might not be headline news, they reflect the realistic, ongoing efforts and directions in which OpenAI is likely investing its resources. The focus remains on advancing AI technology responsibly, ethically, and in ways that benefit society as a whole.
If you have more questions or specific topics you’d like to explore, feel free to ask Mr. AI!"
submitted by Aelexi93 to ChatGPT [link] [comments]


2024.05.28 10:07 WizardOfEcommerce Lessons From Spending $249,781.22 on Facebook Ads for Our E-Commerce Brand This Year

Good day, Redditors.
I'm writing this post to share the leassons that me and my team has learned this year from spending almost $250k on facebook ads for our own e-commerce brand.
Let's get started.
I started advertising on Facebook in 2017, which is seven years ago. It feels like two years, really. Back in 2017, when the Facebook ads platform was quite new, it was hard not to get results. Businesses used stock images in their ads and made millions in sales.
Back then, if you started Facebook ads, it was like having the only restaurant in town, and just because you were the only one in town, it would always be full. This was Facebook ads back then.
Fast-forward to 2024, and it's like having 100 restaurants in a small town. Everyone is competing for the same customer. Advertising today is hard. Actually, you could say that in 2018, when there was more competition than in 2017, the same thing you could say about 2019 and 2020 (the release year of IOS 14). What's the point that I'm trying to make? Facebook ads in 2024 are easier than they will be in 2025 and 2026.
If you just look at all the legacy brands in the car industry, skin care industry, or any other industry, they still mostly use tv ads, billboard ads, and youtube ads; if they are advertising on Facebook, their ads suck. That being said, direct-to-consumer or any other small business owner still has time to get it. Yes, it's more challenging but will only become more complex.
That being said, let's jump to the lessons I have learned this year, and hopefully, you can take some nuggets away from this post.
1) THE CREATIVE
This year, we have tested more than 400 ad creatives for our brand, and we still haven't done enough testing. Content really is the king. Last year, I wrote about the need to test at least five creatives a week. That's long gone. The tiktokization is real in Facebook ads as well. The more you test, the faster you find winning ads that can scale.
This year's learning on creatives is that best-performing ads don't live as long as they used to. In 2023, we still had ads from 2022 that were the best-performing ads for some clients. This year, it's way different. The life of the best-performing ad has gone down. This means we must create more ad variations, especially when we find a winning ad angle.
I would suggest anyone spend at least 30 minutes on Instagram reels and look at the content that interests them. Then, look at your Facebook feed the next day; you will see tons of ads about the thing that you watched on the Instagram reel the previous day.
Creating just few ads a month is not enough. Back in 2017 you could run 2 ads for the whole year and just print money. It's 2024 and two ads should be launched every day.
So, how can you test hundreds of ads a month?
2) THE RESEARCH
Every small, medium, service-based, direct-to-consumer business owner, marketing director, and CMO has a major advantage over big legacy brands.
It is the ability to connect with your core customers on social media. The way to do that is by researching. Every business has a medium—and large-size competitor in its market. Go to their website, socials, and Google reviews and look for 1, 2, and 3-star reviews about their business.
This is where you can find a lot of golden nuggets on what customers don't like about their product, their customer service, their offer, their service, and so on.
Use that information and create ad content that shows that your product service does not have ".... these problems."
Let's just imagine that you are selling premium quality shoes, and one of your competitors is doing the same, but many of their 2-star reviews say that the competitors' shoes are causing blisters on your feet. You can use that information and your ads to say "that your shoes will protect the customer's feet from blisters."
If you have a better product, some of your competitors use that information and ad creatives around that. Before you do that, read every single 1, 2, and 3-star review and note down what the review was about.
You will be able to take away at least 10+ ad angle ideas from these reviews, and you can create hundreds of ads that you can test.
Back in 2018, ad testing was easy. You created ten ads, each of them with a different messege. 4 for the top of the funnel. Four for the middle of the funnel. 2 for the bottom of the funnel, and you could run it for the rest of the year.
Right now, you need to do a lot of research to truly understand your customers so you can create ads that speak to them. We ran through our competitors this year just by creating ads that spoke to our customers' desires and needs.
Every two weeks, we check our competitor's bad reviews to see if there is a new ad angle that we could test.
Have you seen legacy brand car ads? All of them are the same. Car driving down the hill, pulling up at their house, a guy or girl walking into the house. Every ad is the same, a lot of times when we see the ad we don't even know which car brand it is because it's all the same.
Same thing is happening right now with Facebook ads. All of the ads look the same, speak to the same people and this makes it harder to get results.
The leasson that we learning this year on research is that it needs to be done daily. There is so much information posted every day on our competiors, or the research studdies that has recently be done that we cannot afford to do marketing research once a year. It needs to be done daily at least for one hour. Those who will do it will get better results with their facebook ads.
3) TESTING
In the past two months I have seen far to many ad account audits and I can tell that 95% of the ad accounts don't know what ad testing even means.
I have seen campaigns named DYNAMIC CREATIVE TEST, but when I look at the ad set level, the dynamic creative is off. The ads inside the ad level are different, 3 different creatives, 2 different copies, the same headline. I ask what exactly are you testing and the answer is always " ads" But what exactly are you testing? " I don't know". That pretty much summs up a lot of advertisers today.
How do we do ad testing? We create one ad angle based on one desire. In this ad angle, we have three images with the same messege ( each image has a different background or any other changing variable), two ad copies, and two headlines. This is a dynamic creative ad.
Once we get results, we break it down by best performing ad creatve, ad copy and headline. Then we create improvement creative variations to the best creative, best ad copy and best headline under a new dynamic creative. Then we repeat the process again. And again, and again. Usually about 10 times. Sometimes even 20 times until we hit a really good performing ad angle.
Here are some an ad angles that always work - "US VS THEM" , "Founders Story", "2(3,4,5) Reasons Why X", "Features Benefits" "Negative Humor". All fo these marketing angles work. It's impossible for them not to work if you put in the effort and find the winning ad combination for these ad angles.
And you can find it by testing. In 2023, we tested one improvement and two new ad angles every week.
This year, we will test at least three improvements on the best-performing ad angles and 5 new ad angle tests every week.
This goes back to what I mentioned before: the more you test, the faster you find winners and the quicker you can scale your ads. We even use AI like Claude for ad copy, script writing, headline writing. We also use photoshop ai for more image creative creation. This helps us speed up the process. One creative person with understanding on how ads need to look like can put out the same amount of ads as four people working full time daily without Ai.
One direct-response copywriter with AI can write as many ad copies daily as four people would write in a week.
Even for some of our clients, we have competitors who literally test 100 ads every week, and it has been a challenge to keep up.
To sum up the lesson, last year, we thought that we tested enough this year, and today, we think that we don't test enough, so we're looking for ways to test 50 creatives a week.
4) SCALING THE WINNING TESTS.
Here are some quick tips on how to scale your winning video ads.
The first thing that we do is try to show the same video message, but in a different way. Then we filmed the exact same video but in a different environment. Then we also introduce different age groups; if your product appeals to 18-65, then you need to have people in your ads that are in those age groups. One ad can be a person who's 19, then another ad is 24, 30, 35, 40, 46, 50+, and so on. People resonate with people in their age group. It's hard for a 55-year-old to resonate with a 19-year-old who does not share the same problems.
If you find a winning ad don't sit on it, don't let it die out, scale the creative by creating more of it that would appeal do different audiences.
It's a common mistake to rely solely on increasing ad spend when a winning creative starts to lose its effectiveness. Instead, consider creating more variations of the ad, especially if the message is still generating results. Don't be afraid to create 50 or more variations of the winning ad. Remember, it's not easy to find a winning creative, so it's important to make the most of it when you do.
Sometimes, it takes us six weeks to find a winning ad messege when we test 50+ ads. Once we find it, we make sure that we squeeze out all the juice from that winning ad messege.
5) ADVERTORIALS, LANDING PAGES ETC.
I have mentioned this in other posts. This is this years biggest leasson. Test more landing pages, advertorials and listicles. We all know that the product page, website always needs to be improved and the more you improve the better conversion you can get.
But what a lot of people overlook is testing separate landing pages and advertorials.
Especially landing pages based on best performing ads. If you talk about a problem in the ad and then just randomly send people to your website you will get sales. But if you talk about the problem and send people to a landing page that goes deeper inside the problem that the customer might be facing and educates them that this one of the best and cost effective solutions out there your ads will get even more conversions.
I almost feel ashamed that last year, we did not do this on the scale that we do now.
We also launch a new landing page or advertorial test for our past week's best-performing ads every week. To continue to the marketing messege. This strategy has been so impactful that we will launch a new sales campaign just for landing pages alone.
6) CREATING SOCIAL CONTENT.
It's not enough to create ads. You also need to create content that you can publish on your feeed to get organic engagement. Getting organic engagement boosts your ads. Also the best organic posts can be used as ads to give it even more engagement.
How many content pieces do you need to post? Ideally? Ten reel videos a day. I do understand that this sounds wild, but here I am. We are not posting ten videos a day yet. Suppose we go back to understand what Facebook and Instagram are trying to optimize for. They want the users to spend as much time as possible on their platform. The only way a user can spend as much time as possible is to consume content. If you publish content that people like to watch, educational, humorous, and showcase content around your product or service, you will get a boost from Facebook and Instagram algorithms. Your ads will get lower CPM; lower CPM = lower CAC. Lower CAC = More profit or more money for advertising to scale your business.
We started posting one post a day, and we saw a decrease in CPM and CAC. Also, engagement on our social media increased. Once people see the ad, they can click on the Facebook or Instagram page, and there's actually some good content that people like to watch, which helps Facebook's algorithm.
7) SUMMARY
Compared to all the previous years, this year has been the hardest in advertising, especially after recent changes in meta-algorithms going heavily into ad content optimization. This meant that we had to be more strategic about testing and more dialed into research than ever. If you had told me in 2018 that you need to test 50 ads a month and do at least 2 hours of research weekly, I would have told you to go F**** yourself. I have succeeded with my five ads per ad account, and I'm good. Looking back, this humbles me and makes me think and ask the question - "what will be required to get success with Facebook ads in 2026?" This is only two years from now? One thing I know for sure is that it will be more challenging than it is now.
Even writing this right now fuels me with an urgency to build things bigger and faster. Cause in two years there is going to be 400 resturants packed in a small town battling for the same customer.
Thanks for reading. I hope that you enjoyed this post. See you in the next one.
submitted by WizardOfEcommerce to FacebookAds [link] [comments]


2024.05.28 04:42 TakenAccountName37 Just had a shower thought: It seems like not long ago, Katy Perry was just as big of a pop star as Taylor, but Scootergate and other PR moves propelled Ms. Swift. Am I wrong?

Katy Perry's career was at or near Taylor Swift's in terms of popularity up until Swift started releasing/re-releasing albums every single year since 2019. Taylor Swift laid low after 1989 until Reputation came out. That album may have charted well, but the songs weren't her best compared to her other albums. In 2015, 2016, and 2018, she wasn't getting the attention she gets now for her music. She came out with Lover in 2019 then she started the whole "I will be re-releasing all of my old music" tour. The pandemic stuff like Folklore and Evermore came out then the re-releases & other new songs.Think about this, she has released an album every year since 2019. That kept her in the spotlight.
At the turn of the last decade, it was her and Katy. When 1989 came out, Katy was chosen to headline the Super Bowl Halftime Show. In 2018, Katy made the news for being the highest-paid judge for the American Idol reboot. She was on the same level if not higher. It sucks how now pop music has one star. Swift has made it a monopoly. No one else has a chance. Katy was so big and now things seems so stagnant for her. This "era" we are in is all because Swift doesn't want to leave the spotlight. Am I missing anything?
submitted by TakenAccountName37 to travisandtaylor [link] [comments]


2024.05.28 04:12 Jaredwesley Dior Wu - Reliable Crypto Trading Program

The most significant leap within the financial markets ecosystem and the means of wealth accumulation and distribution are all going to be finding themselves center stage digitally. How the internet and its related technologies have made the world so hyper-connected that every single millisecond of movement within the financial markets of the world factor in even a tenth of a cent in real-time and on-demand, all thanks to how vastly advanced our technologies have become and how that has, in turn, made the tools, information and the resources of the financial markets much more accessible and transparent to the average person. This is especially helpful for the new-age digitized markets of today, such as stock trading and, these days more popularly, when trading the new hotly-volatile roster of cryptocurrencies that seem only to keep on growing in terms of the variety available on offer or the number of headlines they tend to make, both sensational and in some cases even utterly mind-boggling.
People do not even know what cryptocurrency really is, how it’s made, what it has to do with blockchain, and how such blockchain helps make the said cryptocurrency valuable. However, in a world where some people are determined to make waves in cryptocurrency, few are doing that while making the knowledge the gained through intensive training, study, countless years of trial and error, and patience more accessible to the ordinary person who has no idea what all the jazz surrounding the complexities of cryptocurrency trading means and has no way actually to simplify the answers to their queries themselves. Enter Dior Wu one of the most seasoned cryptocurrency trading veterans you will find in the market today.
People like Dior Wu are not your average stockbrokers and asset managers who are looking to get you to invest your funds at your risk in return for a cut of the profits if you actually make money through the said investment venture. In fact, people like him want the likes of you to be able to talk like that Dior Wu stock broker you met at your local bank earlier by equipping you with the relevant skills and knowledge to not only understand the technical jargon and complex lingo of the business but to set you up to carve out your own path of success in your cryptocurrency trading journey.
That’s not all; you can also find yourself receiving expertly dedicated one on one coaching by the likes of Dior Wu himself, who has time and time again went on to prove his mettle just like his words that are as good as a bond when it comes to the world of cryptocurrency trading. It only makes sense to get yourself this dedicated one on one coaching from such an industry expert as everyone has a different understanding of their financial goals and what they are willing to do, learn, and at times even unlearn, in order to grasp better the complexities surrounding any economic pursuits, but this is all especially true for the hyper-volatile world of cryptocurrency trading.
However, coaches such as Mr. Dior Wu understand that one on one coaching may not be for everyone and may not fit everyone’s budget, which is why this kind of coaching, which is essentially designed to help you understand the cryptocurrency industry better, will find itself trimmed down in the form of cryptocurrency signals and market reviews being provided by Dior Wu and his dedicated team of cryptocurrency experts who spend long hours every single day observing market trends, making sense out of market data and studying all kinds of financial risk and considerations related to your cryptocurrency trading aspirations.
This means of information has been well received, more so than ever, since this way, you don’t have to first engage in some kind of one to one classroom set-up and bury yourself under an influx of information overload and instead follow the signals being posted by the expert team who is doing all the mathematical heavy-lifting for you. So all you need to do is follow simple instructions and keep pressing a few buttons as advised (all with a little bit of risk, of course, like all legitimate investment opportunities).
Being able to find yourself a good mentor who can coach you on something as financially sensitive as cryptocurrency trading is difficult, so it is best to snap up the opportunity, especially when it is being presented to you during these turbulent times where uncertainty has enveloped pretty much all aspects of life and the global economy. So what are you waiting for? Hop on board and change your destiny today through world-class cryptocurrency trading coaching
submitted by Jaredwesley to u/Jaredwesley [link] [comments]


2024.05.28 04:02 Cirkusleader A review of all the arcs from someone with way too much time in this game.

Hey all,
So I’m playing through Persona 5 again for the 18 quintillionth time and I kinda wanted to do a sort of “arc review” type thing. Just give my thoughts on each arc of the game. Since there are 9, I’ll be ranking each one out of 9. So the “worst” one will be 9/9, but I’ll also be doing them in order. I hope that makes sense.
Also I wanted to start by saying that I don’t think any of these arcs are BAD. Even the worst ones, if put into 99% of other games, would be the best part of that game. It’s just that in comparison to the rest of P5 they have some issues that I feel are hard to overlook. But I mean, hell, this is my favorite game of all time. I’ve put like… multiple thousands of hours into it at this point between Vanilla and Royal. So even with the issues I have, none of them are big enough to break my absolute love for this game. So keep that in mind as I make some critiques, because even the biggest problem in this game isn’t exactly a problem. It’s like… the equivalent of losing a single penny.
Now, onto the criteria. I’ll be judging the arcs on a few different things. The story, the primary characters that are focused on, the palace ruler, and the palace itself, which includes the boss (or sometimes bosses). Though these do get a bit rambly, and sometimes these things sort of flow into each other, but those are the general concepts I’m looking at. So with that in mind, let’s begin…
Kamoshida - Palace Ranking: 3/9
So taking into account that Kamoshida is our “tutorial” Palace, I am going to give him some liberties. Firstly, I usually prefer villains with a little “more” to them. We’ll get into this a bit more later, but in my opinion a good villain - even one who is unrepentantly evil - needs to have a reason behind their evil that makes sense in context for them. Kamoshida’s “reason” is basically that he’s already peaked and… somehow that’s tied to sexual assault? I don’t want to say him beating the kids “makes sense” but given the context of it being the volleyball team, and his whole thing about having a drive to succeed and meet his previous peak kinda makes some level of sense. But the thing is, that isn’t focused on enough in my eyes. But because he’s our tutorial antagonist, I’m more willing for him to have less depth. It’s the same reason I don’t expect Henchy McUnderling to have a backstory, but I expect the main boss to have one.
That said, the story here is great despite that. This arc does a phenomenal job of really pulling the player into the story, because it’s one of the few arcs where the protagonist is under direct threat from the villain. I mean sure, later palaces do have the deadline and whatnot but let’s be real, Madarame doesn’t know Joker from a hole in the ground. He’s under threat by proxy of Yusuke, not so much himself. But it also, somehow, does a good job of presenting TWO party members with equal stake in the plot here as well. We’ll see later a time when this does NOT work, but here we have both Ryuji and Ann dealing with Kamoshida, and sort of representing him as both a past and present threat. Ryuji is against him for his previous actions against him and his friends, whereas Ann is against him for his actions against her and her friends presently. And that brings me into the characters of this arc… so I personally think Ann and Ryuji are two of the best members of the Phantom Thieves. They’re such core parts of the team, they’re always doing something for the team in each arc, and they’re probably the two who are the best “presented” members. I’ll get more into what I mean on that later, but the gist is that they feel like very front and center parts of their recruitment arc, unlike some others.
I also like the Palace. I don’t have any particular insights into this one, though. The puzzles are fine. The boss fight is fine. The encounters are fine. The music is fine…. The aesthetic is immaculate, but otherwise it’s sort of just solid. I think it’s a good entry point that always feels nostalgic once you’re further into the game.
So yeah, Kamoshida’s arc is really good. There just happen to be better arcs overall. But for the tutorial, it’s a REAL masterclass.
Madarame - Palace Ranking: 7/9
So Madarame falls a bit from Kamoshida in my eyes. Let’s start with the good - Yusuke. Remember how with Kamoshida I said that Joker isn’t really threatened so much in later arcs? That’s the case here, because the threat is almost solely on Yusuke. But what’s interesting with Yusuke is that, at first, WE are presented as the “villains” here, at least from his perspective. With the Kamoshida arc, nobody really sees Joker, Ryuji, and Ann as the aggressors. The whole school is under Kamoshida’s thumb and everyone knows what he’s doing, but they feel powerless to stop him. With Madarame, Yusuke is almost in a sort of Stockholm Syndrome mindset where he feels Madarame’s actions are just, and believes he’s simply helping the man who raised him. It’s interesting to see the flip when we enter the Metaverse and Yusuke sees the “true” Madarame as the monster he is. I didn’t mention it before, but I think the best part of (most) of the awakenings is that the characters are struck with some kind of realization before it happens. For Ryuji, he learns that Kamoshida’s provocation was premeditated with the intention of getting rid of the competition for his volleyball team. For Ann, she learns that Kamoshida raped her best friend. But for Yusuke, his realization is more about himself. He learns that HE was wrong, as well as the fact that Madarame never cared for him and was just using him, and it’s cool. That said the rest of this arc is… whatever. Madarame is slightly better than Kamoshida in his motivations, but worse in that he’s nowhere near as present or threatening, we don’t really get to SEE a lot of the issues Yusuke faces with Madarame like we do with Kamoshida, and overall I find his palace a bit less memorable. I will say I like the Saiyuri “puzzle”, and I think the boss fight is really good, but that’s pretty much all I have to say regarding it.
It doesn’t quite draw you in as well as Kamoshida, Madarame isn’t presented as well as Kamoshida, and the palace isn’t quite as potent. But like I said, I don’t find any of these arcs to be “bad”. I just think Madarame is sort of lower on the “good” spectrum.
Kaneshiro - Palace Ranking: 9/9
Now, I’ve always had a lot of issues with Kaneshiro’s arc. Mostly because it feels to me like a “filler” arc in anime. The general things with filler arcs are… characters acting out of character, established lore and trends being ignored for the sake of “cool factor”, and story that doesn’t necessarily directly tie into the overall narrative. All three of those apply to this arc, and stem from one thing: Makoto.
I’ll be real, when I first played P5 I hated Makoto. Every time I replay the game she grows a little more on me, but she’s still my 2nd to least favorite Phantom Thief, and there are a few reasons. First - and the thing that made me initially hate her - is her role in this palace. She’s initially presented as an antagonist. And that would be fine if she actually was an antagonist. But the thing is we’re supposed to like this character, and the first like… 10 interactions we have with her are her being super condescending, petty, and antagonistic. But every interaction AFTER that with her, especially in this palace but also in later palaces, relies on either “tell don’t show”, previously established rules being broken, or mischaracterizing the other characters. So let me explain a bit more about these. First, “tell don’t show” refers primarily to the idea that the audience is told information, but not being presented information. It’s a lot more impactful to SEE Yusuke’s art than to just be told “Yusuke is a talented artist”. With Makoto, a lot of the time, the game TELLS us that she’s smart, but doesn’t show it. She either does something dumb (this happens a lot in this arc) or manages to do something because the rest of the team suddenly becomes less intelligent. For example, early on in her recruitment she asks how the Thieves typically go about strategizing to steal treasures, and the cast goes “Um… Strat-of-gees? What are that?” at which point Makoto goes “Wait.. you fucking idiots don’t make plans? Fuck it. I’ll do it then.” and then… nothing changes. Even if you ignore the fact that the previous palace had one of the most Sly Cooper-ish heists ever with a lot of planning and many moving parts, Makoto becoming the “team strategist” doesn’t make any overall difference. We handle every single palace following this one the same way. And this continues through the whole palace. “We’re faced with two enemies who are too strong to take on at the same time. What do we do?” “Hmm…. hummm…. Uhhhh… duhhhhhh….” “Why don’t we lure one away?” “OMG KWEEN UR DA MOST SMORT”. And this extends to her awakening as well. In all previous and future awakenings, the characters have some kind of realization. I mentioned this before. But Makoto… doesn’t. Kaneshiro just goes “Yeah. I’m gonna expect you to pay me a bunch of money and if you don’t, I’ll blackmail you into slavery” which we had already known he would do. That’s the entire reason we were investigating him. That’s what he outright says to us in his club. So why does him REPEATING himself here cause Makoto to awaken? I don’t know. She doesn’t even have any link to this guy, which is another issue with the arc. Kaneshiro himself has nothing close to the same level of threat, characterization, screen time, or even backstory. All we know about him is that he “crawled his way out of the dregs” and that is quite literally it.
The palace itself is also… pretty middling. I find the bank itself to be pretty bland, the lettenumber puzzle is boring and simplistic, and the boss fight is probably the… second worst one.
Now the thing is that if you stuffed this arc into like… Dragon Quest or something (obviously with requisite changes to fit that world), it would probably be the best part of that game. And don’t get me wrong, I played DQ11 and generally enjoyed it. But it’s really carried by a lot of its characters, so having an actually decent arc would make this the best part of that game. But compared to the rest of P5 it really stands out as being the worst part of the game.
That said, Price rocks.
Futaba - Palace Ranking: 2/9
Now for a complete flip, we have one of the best arcs. For starters, I do think this is my actual favorite Palace in general. The layout, theming, puzzles, dynamic storytelling, and most prominently the MUSIC make the actual palace immaculate. My sole issue with it is that the boss fight is less a fight, and more of an interactive set piece. I think overall it is, technically, the “worst” boss because it’s barely a boss. But at the same time, what it does for the story of the palace is really good. So I end up sort of split on it. But that is literally the only part of this palace that is even moderately middling.
The rest of this Palace is absolutely, completely fucking amazing.
First, this palace has the unique case of being the single one where the palace ruler becomes a party member. The entire palace is us learning about Futaba. There isn’t even really an “antagonist” in this arc entirely. Now, that isn’t necessarily good or bad on its own, but given how important Futaba is to the overall plot, and how this palace itself sort of kicks off the overarching plot points with Shido, his cronies, and the Metaverse as a whole, it’s great that this section isn’t bogged down with an additional major player. Normally we have something like Yusuke, Madarame, and the plot as it pertains specifically to those two characters. Here, we just have Futaba, and the plot as it pertains to her… BUT that plot also pertains to the game’s story at large, where someone like Madarame’s doesn’t necessarily do that.
It also helps that I fucking adore Futaba. She is one of the best written characters in this game, and Erica Goddamn Linbeck never fails to deliver in this role. Futaba is one of the few characters in media who can just make me cry. Even the most innocuous scene is up for some waterworks as long as Futaba does that fucking whimpery voice crack. And the thing is, you don’t actually MEET Futaba until basically the end of her Palace, and somehow the game does an amazing job of making you love this girl who you have basically never spoken to before.
The palace itself is also amazing. And again, it does something that the others don’t really do. It mixes distortion with personality. Here’s what I mean; Kamoshida’s palace is cool as hell because it’s so distorted. It’s a big-ass, super cool castle. But the thing is… Kamoshida’s whole thing is volleyball, and there’s nothing in the castle that really screams “volleyball” to me outside of… well, the volleyball team having cognitive versions in there. But it’s not the same. With Futaba, we have a big pyramid complete with traps, mummies, quick sand, murals, etc. But it also has a techy element to it because Futaba is a hacker. There’s code all over the place. One of the puzzles is a binary code puzzle. And that’s what I mean. We get to see a little of Futaba’s personality and interests in the palace, as opposed to just “This is a castle”, “ this is a bank”. Or Madarame where his distortion is almost explicitly about his interests and not quite as crazy.
Futaba’s palace strikes a perfect balance in so many ways, making it into one of the best parts of this game.
Oh. And also, The Days When My Mother Was There is one of the best tracks in all of Persona.
Okumura - Palace Ranking: 8/9
Let’s be real, a lot of people feel like this is the worst part of the game, and I kinda see why. It’s just that, for me, the only thing elevating it above Kaneshiro is that it’s actually plot critical and doesn’t feel like lame filler fluff. Buuut it kind of has the opposite effect of Futaba’s palace, where there you had a very focused narrative about a few specific, interwoven things, here you have three plots trying to all fight for the spotlight, and they sort of fit together like a chain. 1 and 2 link, 2 and 3 link, but 1 and 3 do not. We have the Morgana and Ryuji fight which… I feel is kind of pointless? The thing is that Morgana didn’t really need an arc here. Morgana gets TWO arcs and in my opinion, neither one feels quite complete. I think it would have been better to just cut this arc and focus more on him learning that he isn’t human. Heck, he could still meet Haru this way. He accidentally takes her into the Metaverse while sneaking off and investigating on his own or something. We get worried, go looking for him, run into him after Sugiura kicks Morgana into a wall, bada bing bada boom everything is better. Because then we can focus the entire arc on Haru, and just have Morgana be the quick and easy catalyst for finding her.
Kinda on that same framework, Okumura falls into the same unfortunate pitfall as Kaneshiro where we barely get to even see the guy. He’s got a collective 10 minutes of screen time, if that, and all it really boils down to is “He wants to be a wealthy politician”. Heck, we don’t even learn what his real corrupting moment was until the Palace is over and Haru kinda exposits it.
Next we have the palace itself. While the theme of it is cool as hell, the palace itself is very bland. People hate the airlock puzzle but honestly, that was the most fun and engaging part of it for me. It's the only part of the palace that feels wacky, conceptual, cool, and requires at least one functioning brain cell.
And finally… the boss fight. I hate this boss. Here’s the thing, people will argue in circles about whether or not it’s hard, but the difficulty isn’t really the issue. The issue is that it feels like a tutorial fight, where the devs had expectations for what the player had been focusing on. If you hadn’t, you’d be fucked. Did you hang out with Hifumi enough to get her party swap ability? I hope so, or you can go fuck yourself. If you didn’t, did you happen to put Morgana and Haru in your party for the final two waves of enemies? I hope so, or you can go fuck yourself. Did you get Personas that deal high wind and psy damage to all enemies? I hope so, or you can go fuck yourself. Did you rank Haru and Morgana up to 3 in darts? I hope so, or you can go fuck yourself. This boss relies so much on so many moving pieces that you are effectively required to use unless you’re a madman who built a full 99 stat almighty Izanami to Myriad Truths your way through the game. It feels like a tutorial on Baton passing, but without explaining that that’s what’s necessary, without giving you the necessary tools for it, and without catering to the way that “you” chose to play. And to me, that’s bad game design. All fights should, in theory, be possible with any build, any play style, any tools. Yeah, sometimes they may be harder, but here the fight is quite literally not possible if you don’t play the way they want you to play, or don't come in with an NG+ 99 stat Satanael like I did for this particular playthrough.
That said, the arc really moves up from last place due to the finale. Futaba’s palace brought the overarching plot into the background, looming there behind you, but here it’s thrown right into the spotlight. This is the new focus.
Sae - Palace Ranking: 4/9
Now, a lot of people would list this as their favorite Palace, and honestly I can kinda see why. If the Okumura arc is the main plot being put front and center, this is them shooting you in the face with it like a serial killer in an interrogation room.
The thing is that this arc has “the twist” and I’ll be real, even to this day “the twist” is one of the most insane things I’ve seen in a game, without feeling unnecessary. AKA it’s crazy, but it doesn't read like it was written by Hideo Kojima or Suda51. It’s also great for characterization of two people we already know. See, unlike past palaces which introduce and build new characters, here we’re building Akechi and Sae - two people we already know, but haven’t spent a lot of direct time with. That said… I also think this should have involved Makoto more. Yeah, maybe it would have bogged things down, but I mentioned earlier that Makoto doesn’t really get her own arc during the Kaneshiro debacle, and now when we have the perfect opportunity to give her one, she just kinda sits in the background. She doesn’t get to confront her sister. She doesn’t get to have “a moment”. She just sits back while Joker and Akechi headline the tour, with everyone else on backups. Heck, even “the plan” is like 90% Futaba, 5% Morgana, and 5% Joker. She does not get to do a singular fucking thing in her own sister’s arc. And I wouldn’t be as upset if she actually got to be a major player with Kaneshiro, and if that arc were just better, but she doesn’t, and it isn’t. So she feels wasted TWICE.
I also kind of have an issue with the palace itself. Yes yes, Whims of Fate is really good. But holy fuck for a Casino you sure don’t spend much time doing actual casino shit. 90% of this palace is just walking around drab, gray hallways and it’s kinda… bland? I’m in a Casino, man. I wanna be interacting with the casino floor. I wanna feel like I’m on the Golden Saucer, not like I’m walking through the back of a post office.
The story overall really carries this palace for me. It’s got an insane twist, great characterization for Akechi and Sae, and is the moment where everything reaches a fever pitch. I consider the end of this Palace to be the beginning of the climax, which carries all the way through to the end of the next palace. Though… that’s an issue of its own, but we’ll get there later.
Look, I do like this arc. I just think it has so much wasted potential, and is heavily carried by the overarching plot and characters, and kind of let down by the palace itself.
Also Sae not being a romance option is a sin. Atlus, you have not fulfilled your penance. Salvation shall not be yours.
Shido - Palace Ranking: 5/9
Shido’s palace is another one where people really really love it and I… I mean I think it's fine. But for a “finale” I’m not super thrilled with it.
Let's talk about my main problem first; Shido himself. In my opinion, a main antagonist should be someone who is incredibly present. Even in something like a mystery where we aren't supposed to know the villain, we should still know who the character is very well until the reveal. But Shido doesn't really feel that way. He’s in maybe 5 to 10 scenes across the whole game prior to his arc, we don't know anything about him other than “wants to rule Japan”, we know nothing of his background or motivations. All we know is that he's a shit heel. And like I said earlier, that's fine for someone like Kamoshida - our tutorial boss. It's far less fine in my opinion for our main antagonist.
I’m also not the biggest fan of the Palace itself. Yeah, the boat is cool or whatever, but I find the actual plot of the palace to be a bit of a slog. There aren't really any crazy reveals, the puzzles are more annoying than fun, and it ends up feeling more like a standard fare dungeon crawl since we don't really learn anything during it.
That said, the palace does cap off with one of the coolest boss fights. Shido’s fight is really cool, and I love how epic his calling card is. But there’s one thing I really need to talk about that really elevates this palace.
Akechi. Akechi is what I think a villain SHOULD be. We meet him early on, he slowly becomes more and more present in the narrative, he eventually joins our team, only to betray us. He has so much build up, such a well realized arc, and the reasons for what he does are stated to us at the end after being hinted at before, but not being outright presented, so when we learn about it, it feels much more impactful. I also love what Royal did for him. I still think he’s pretty great in the original, but making his anger progress from just wanting to take down Shido, to now having a petty grudge against a “friend” who outsmarted and defeated him feels like a perfect capstone for everything that’s been set up. I also strangely like his “death”. I know a lot of people don’t like it, but I dunno. I think it works well.
So yeah. When this is the Akechi palace it’s great. When it’s the Shido palace it’s… it’s fine. The boss fight slaps though.
Yaldabaoth - Palace Ranking: 6/9
Now, this one is kinda personal, and deals with the last issue I mentioned. Yaldy here is technically our final boss. I mean, he was for the vanilla game at least, and I’ve always had an issue with how Persona game, and most JRPGs in general, handle the whole “kill god” thing. If you are going to do that, we need to KNOW God, just like any other character. Here, he’s not someone we know, and he comes out of nowhere. And I know people are gonna go “Um exkweeze me wat do u meen? We no Igor from start of game dumazz?” Yeah. Let’s talk about this. 1. There is no reason to suspect Igor is god, for both new and returning players. 2. Because we don’t know him, there’s no narrative impact for beating him. 3. There’s no reason to actually think he is in any way competent or reasonable, because his whole argument is “mankind deserves to die because I set up a rigged test to prove a point in the least scientific way possible by forcing it so that no other outcome happens.” and it’s the stupidest shit. 4. There is no distinct reason for him to be God. Once he reveals he is the grail, he is a 100% different guy. You could make Yaldy be Shido, or Kawakami, or the old guy who listens to the radio in Yongen for all it matters. He is not a character. He’s a big, stupid fucking robot and yeah, that’s cool and all, but it’s not narratively impactful for our “final” challenge to just be some random fuck who showed up out of nowhere, and is only in the 120 hour game for about 3 of those hours. This whole arc would be like if a major, 100+ episode anime set up a massive, world ending threat who we get to know over a length of time, and is considered one of the greatest anime antagonists, only to sweep him to the side and bring a rabbit alien god in out of nowhere.
Oh… wait…
Anyway, stupid-ass worthless-ass final boss aside, I actually do like the rest of this arc. The characterization and twist for Lavenza, the arc for Morgana, and most importantly, the Palace itself. It’s shorter than the rest, but I absolutely adore the Mementos depths. The design, the puzzles, and above all the MUSIC are all absolutely amazing.
And for as much as I complained about Yaldy… there really isn’t anything quite like summoning a giant, six-winged archdemon to shoot God in the face with a gun-sword.
So yeah. This Palace is fun, has some great story beats, and does feel pretty cinematic and climactic. I just don’t like that the “climax” revolves around some random dude showing up and going “It was me all along, Barry!” and you’re like “I’m sorry, who are you?”
Maruki - Palace Ranking: 1/9
And boy am I glad Royal makes a more climactic ending. Now this is going to sound weird considering I ranked this as number 1, but I DO have issues with this arc. And that issue is uh… Kasumi..? Sumire..? Whatever. The thing is I find it hard to blame the arc itself for my issues with her because they kind of span the entire game, but it all comes to a head here. I well and truly believe this game could go from a Tetratrillion / 10 to a Tetratrillion-and-1 / 10 if she just… weren’t in the game. Because I think basically every scene she’s in that is not directly dealing with her takes away from that scene. And I think her inclusion in this arc takes away from it. HOWEVER, her stuff is dealt with quickly, while also building up other plot points, the Palace ruler, and a certain other character who we will get to shortly.
But despite my minor gripes with her, this arc is absolutely fantastic for a few reasons.
Let’s start with the Palace itself. It rocks. The puzzles are fun and make a lot of sense for the ruler, the music fucking slaps, it's got a great narrative structure where it basically makes us take a look into the past of the character it focuses on, and the overall style suits it perfectly. It's this excellent blend of mad science and ideology.
Next we have the overall story of the arc and it is done so well. Basically, the Palace ruler wants to create a “perfect world” where everyone is always happy, suffering doesn't exist, etc. And it's great because he is the only antagonist who isn't really presented as being “wrong.” Even Futaba and Sae, whose palace end with them effectively “healing” and becoming good people again, are still presented as being incorrect. However they don't really do that here. It truly is just a battle of ideology between the ruler and the Thieves, where the Thieves believe that they can, and should, intervene where necessary, but overall people need to strive and thrive on their own once the Thieves break down whatever is holding them back. But their opponent here believes that people shouldn't strive for greatness, or grab opportunity by the horns. “You don't need to strive for greatness. Believe in me.” Are the lines to his theme song, and they encapsulated his entire concept perfectly. He isn't painted as someone you hate. He isn't necessarily painted as wrong. He's painted as someone we disagree with, and that's not something we’ve seen before.
Next, we have Akechi (again). This game has a fantastic cast, with Akechi being one of the standouts for me. This arc plays as a sort of epilogue for him. His story “ended” with him concluding that he was wrong, that he should live how he wants, and that maybe he DOES have friends who care about him. Even Ryuji, the guy who rags on Akechi the most, begins choking up at the end after Akechi disappears, because he doesn't really hate him. They all - Futaba and Haru included - realize he's just a victim in all this. But the best part for me is how he concludes this arc. At the end he’s given a choice - accept the fake reality and live, or deny it and risk a world where he may be dead. After all, we don't know if he truly died (I'm of the opinion he didn't based on the post credit scene) but he doesn't know that. And without even a second's hesitation he says “Don’t think dangling my life before us will have any impact on our decision.”. He spent his whole life living under Shido’s foot, striving only for a childish revenge that he was denied, and learning eventually that he has friends who accept him not as the righteous detective prince, but as… Goro Akechi. And he wants to die on those terms if he can, as opposed to being forced to live in a fake world under someone else’s rule.
And that brings us to the ruler. Takuto Maruki. Now I’ve already touched on why he's so effective from the standpoint of his ideals, but there's more to him. First, unlike our other main baddies, we actually know him. We first meet him after Kamoshida’s palace, and he is a constant presence throughout. But the most important part is that you are required to get to know him. If you don't max out his confidant, you don't get this ending. The game ends with Yaldy. So not only is he constantly around within the narrative, but his side content actually becomes main content. It is required. And that is very important for us. Because if he was just some random guy we had never met who shows up and goes “yeah I wanna stop all suffering” then like… Great? But I don't have a reason to trust you. I do have a reason for Maruki. He DOES want the best, even if he's a bit misguided, and we’ve learned just what kind of person he is over the last 100 hours. It makes it all the harder to fight him because yeah, you disagree with him, and it's already hard enough to break everyone else’s dreams, but now you’re directly spitting in the face of his dreams, too. It is masterfully done.
And so is the finale. Maruki’s boss fight is so well done. It's the perfect mix of actual gameplay and spectacle WITH an emotional payoff, which Yaldy lacked. The first section is a crazy blend of the Madarame and Yaldy’s fight, and it works perfectly. But after that first phase we enter big cool spectacle zone of fighting a 100 foot tall monolith of a Persona, all culminating in a one on one fist fight between Joker and Maruki as he vents his frustrations at losing.
It is done perfectly. This arc is absolutely phenomenal. It's so emotional, so well structured, so well built, and such a perfect way to end this amazing experience. After my first experience with the original P5 I did not think they could make my favorite game ever even better. And somehow they did.
So anyway. That's my whole stream of thoughts. What’s everyone else think? How would you rank the arcs?
submitted by Cirkusleader to Persona5 [link] [comments]


2024.05.28 02:51 masterofpiss The MK News Media Conspiracy Part 2/2

The MK News Media Conspiracy Part 2/2
Link to part one for those who haven't seen it: https://www.reddit.com/SMG4/s/gX6dRctOxm
Now before I begin part two of this theory, I'd like to disclose something. You see, one of the major goals in this theory is setting up a foundation for future theories to build off of, meaning that while some parts of this theory might be shaky, just know that it's partially due to this point as some things currently don't have answers due to the limited amount of info on the MK News Media at the tine of writing this. However, this theory is still incredibly solid as a whole, so don't let this one point ruin the theory as a whole for you. Alright, with that out of the way, let's begin.
Now in order to understand the role of the MK News Media we need to go back quite a bit in the smg4 timeline, specifically to late 2018. You see, at this point in the timeline, a news company in the mushroom kingdom, fittingly called the MK News Media has been struggling to stay in business after the decline in viewers caused by both the Waluigi and Rapper Bob arcs. You see, they didn't achieve all that much success during these arcs due to the infamous T-pose apocalypse (top left of image 2) and Rapper Bob's immense fame (left upper middle of image 2). This would lead to them declaring bankruptcy and nearly going under around a month or two prior to the anime arc. However, their near bankruptcy would attract a group of entities that mysteriously came from another universe (note: it's possible that the entities in question potentially came the great beyond, and could be the in-universe equivalent of the show's writers. However there is also evidence against this possibility, despite there being genuine evidence for it, so this could go either way). Now, you're probably wondering what this group of entities from another universe actually is. However, my answer for this is quite vague because I'm currently a bit unsure where they came from.
However, Despite my vague description of where they came from, I'm actually pretty certain that this group of entities is HIGHLY dangerous because they have the ability to influence future events in the smg4 timeline itself (even more than mr.puzzles) through things like yellow journalism and misinformation. Now a few potential examples of them using this ability (after taking over MK News) are causing smg4 to directly go after smg3 in "Mario's Spicy Day," after a bit of static plays when he starts smg3's spicy ones video (bottom left of image 2), making peach ban anime by discussing that anime is destroying the mushroom kingdom (top right of image 2), and causing lawyer kong go after smg4 after giving him info about smg4's origins (bottom right of image 2). Now while those are just a few examples, there are way more of these that I didn't mention, but we'd be here all day if I went over all of these examples, so let's continue from where we left off.
Now, this group of entities would tell the original heads of MK News that they are interested in buying out their dying news company, telling them that they'll make sure that MK News is successful in the long run, and that all they have to do is let the entities buy them out, even offering to give the original company heads a HEFTY sum of cash in the process. Unfortunately, the heads of the company would accept this deal because the only other option they had would be to go out of business. However, they would eventually come to regret this decision. You see, the mysterious group of entities from a different universe would fire ALL of the current staff and replace them with brand new employees that have similar mindsets as the new heads of the MK News Media, this mindset in particular being that of yellow journalism. Now, for those of you wondering what yellow journalism is: yellow journalism is removing or editing certain parts of information in a news story in order to sell a great story to the masses, and THIS is massively important when regarding the MK News Media, because the idea of yellow journalism would result in them causing certain events in the smg4 timeline (as mentioned earlier), and potentially even changing certain parts of smg4 canon, like the origins of Axol Jr and the Toast Guy (image 3) (Note: this ability is currently speculative due to the lack of evidence towards this being the case. However, considering that the MK News Media seems to take a lot of inspiration from the concept of yellow journalism, it would be a genuine possibility to consider). This would, in-turn, strengthen the story that the MK News Media wants smg4 to tell.
Now, They would also use yellow journalism to cause the events of IMWTLMOE (by creating a series of events started by through getting mario drunk with milk containing alcohol, and this would result in Mario's friends leaving him (top left of image 4)), and Clown Fever (by introducing the depresso's "girlfriend" to the biggest clown in town, aka, us (bottom left of image 4)) before scrapping these potential news stories/smg4 arcs because they thought the stories weren't good enough, as well as the negative fan reception to the start of said stories (image 5). However, they still had a use for clown fever, because one of the heads in the company mentioned the idea of a puppet master villain manipulating the smg4 cast, and considering they knew that an individual known as mr.puzzles had recently taken an interest in the smg4 show around this time through a local newspaper featuring his logo (which meggy would see around this time, as shown in the upper top left of image 6) (upper bottom right of image 4), they would go with this idea and start the preparations for it.
Now, their preparations for this storyline would begin by causing the carnival in the showgrounds to be abandoned through the use of fake news and yellow journalism (lower top right of image 4), as well as using said yellow journalism to close down the circus that depresso was a part of (upper top right of image 4) (evidence for this is shown in the lower bottom right of image 4, where we can see that depresso is acting like he's genuinely homeless while in the showgrounds). Next, they created a series of events that would cause the grand door to be opened (lower top left of image 6). From there, they'd trap the cosmic horror from the grand door inside a sealing keyboard (upper bottom left of image 6) (note: mr.puzzles may not have been the one responsible for trapping the cosmic horror in his keyboard due to his lack of power outside of the digital realm, as well as him running away from mario in the puzzlevision movie (lower bottom left of image 6). However, he was able to trap the smg4 crew in his head, so it's still at least somewhat possible that he trapped the cosmic horror in the eldritch keyboard.) and set smg4 into his pursuit of the perfect video by using mr.yeast to make smg4 obsessed with making far more content with way lower quality (upper top right of image 6), and helping smg3 cancel smg4 without realizing it later on in the episode (lower top right of image 6). Afterwards, they'd make sure mr.puzzles would get the demonic keyboard, which would set the events of the puppet master storyline in motion. Meanwhile, The MK News Media would start the first phase of their plan, that being, disposing of Princess Peach.
You see, one of the major goals of the current MK News Media is to have COMPLETE control over the spread of information in the smg4 universe, so they could continue making yellow journalism esc. stories without having to worry about governmental figures like Princess Peach (upper bottom right of image 6) (note:while there isn't any evidence for this at the moment, there is the possibility that Peach could have gotten suspicious of the MK News Media around this point in the timeline, which would make this plan feel more logical in the long run), so disposing of Peach would be essential to this plan. Hell, the destruction of peach's castle would also make for a great headline with great character development for the smg4 cast (lower bottom right of image 6), as well as a massive change in the smg4 universe. Now, unfortunately for the smg4 cast, the MK News Media would succeed in getting rid of princess peach through using the demonic keyboard and mr.puzzles, which would lead into phase two of their plan, making sure the smg4 crew doesn't learn about the true intentions of the MK News Media, or in other words, making sure they aren't a threat. You see, phase two of this plan would involve mr.puzzles and the showgrounds, with mr.puzzles serving as a distraction for the smg4 cast. This is because despite not being all that powerful outside of his domain, he was still the mastermind behind the events of western spaghetti and wotfi 2023 (top left of image 7). Now, aside from serving as a distraction, mr.puzzles would also sell the smg4 crew the showgrounds (upper bottom left of image 7), a place that would be ABSOLUTELY ESSENTIAL TOWARDS THE PLAN OF THE MK NEWS MEDIA.
You see, in the showgrounds, the smg4 cast would begin construction on a new castle, and this castle would have a boarded-up room (lower bottom left of image 7) that potentially contains an object that gives The MK News Media NEAR COMPLETE control over EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING in the smg4 universe. Except for two characters, those being Tari and Mr.Puzzles (my reasoning as to why Tari wouldn't be affected by the MK News Media at this time is mainly due to what I believe the role of clench is in the greater story, which I'll be discussing shortly. As for my reasoning regarding mr.puzzles not being affected, it mainly has to do with his reactions at the start of the puzzlevision movie, as well as his actions throughout the adware saga, because him being under the MK News Media's control throughout the entire saga wouldn't make that much sense). Now, when the Smg4 Castle was finished being built, The MK News Media would start affecting both the characters and even the very writing of the smg4 universe itself by giving the background characters specific roles in mr.puzzles's shows (like wotfi 2023 (upper top right of image 7)), and causing certain characters like Mario to behave VERY OUT OF CHARACTER, with a few examples of this being shown during the events of both Mario goes coo-coo crazy (lower top right of image 7), and Wotfi 2023 (upper bottom right of image 7). Now in these episodes, Mario would act in a controlled and somewhat malicious manner in the former episode, and in a completely malicious manner in the latter episode, with these behaviors being caused by The MK News Media controlling him like a puppet on strings, while mario is no longer in control of his own actions.
Now, while everything was going perfectly for the MK News Media at this point in their plan, one of their employees ABSOLUTELY DESPISED what they were doing, and would hack into Tari's arm one day, calling himself "Clench" (lower bottom right of image 7). You see, through this persona, he would start his plan to take down the MK News Media by helping Tari while keeping a low profile so that MK News Media doesn't figure out who he is (evidence for this point is clearly shown when we see clench turn himself off twice in "No TV Makes Mario No Okie Dokie" when mr.puzzles makes himself known near the start of the episode (upper top left of image 8), and when the rest of the smg4 cast is running away from mario while heading towards the basement near the episode's end (lower top left of image 8)). Later on in his plan, he would try to convince Tari to go through the boarded-up door and destroy the object behind it, so that all of this insanity can FINALLY come to an end. However, the second half of clench's plan hasn't happened just yet, BUT we can look at all of the events that lead up to where we are now at the time of writing this, so with this in mind, let's begin by going over the 5-part puzzlevision event.
Now, sometime after clench would start the first part of his plan, mr.puzzles would begin to finish executing his own plan by sucking the smg4 cast into his head so he can make his puzzlevision tv shows. During which, he would ask for great reviews for his shows (upper bottom left of image 8), and while he'd get really good reviews, it wasn't the 5 star rating he wanted, and the MK News Media wasn't helping matters whatsoever, because their news headlines and control over the smg4 universe would slowly cause mr.puzzles to hit his limit at the time of MPIGSS. You see, we're made to believe that we are the ones slowly lowering mr.puzzles's ratings throughout the episode (lower bottom left of image 8). However, we are unable to rate puzzlevision episodes until AFTER they come out (upper top right of image 8), so it's more than likely that the MK News Media is rating mr.puzzles's show here, and considering that it's likely them rating MPIGSS, it wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if mr.puzzles made a deal with them in order to continue making entertainment after the smg4 crew would defeat him, and this potential deal is something we can see being hinted towards in the puzzlevision movie.
You see, while the movie starts out with him going crazy while hearing the review by the MK News Media, he somehow maintains his composure to an eerie degree throughout the puzzlevision movie (bottom right of image 8), and strangely, mario spends most of the film not really doing all that much (lower top right of image 8), almost as if a higher power won't let him defeat mr.puzzles. Hell, Mr. Puzzles LITERALLY makes Luigi into a meat mallet despite him intending to kill the cast (top left of image 9), which potentially hints towards him playing a bigger role than we thought with the MK News Media, and there's more still going with these two entities potentially working together, but for now, let's head into the role that MK News Media had in the events of "SMG4 doesn't meme for one second", a seemingly innocent smg4 episode that hides a lot of potential evidence beneath the surface.
You see, in this episode we see multiple instances of things in this episode that don't just feel off, they feel, VERY off. You see, this episode starts out with the episode's opening showing a horror movie esc sequence (bottom left of image 9) right before we see smg4 coming across a meme of a spinning fish that causes him to go completely bonkers (top right of image 9). All the while, glitching and static briefly appear and dissappear on screen (bottom right of image 9). Now I shouldn't have to explain why this instance of both glitching and static is important at this point, because we all now that it's an indicator of mr.puzzl- WAIT A DAMN SECOND..... Mr.Puzzles is inactive at the time of this episode, meaning that this couldn't have been him, which also means that.... OH.... OH GOD! Mr.puzzles wasn't the only entity behind the static and glitching in the smg4 universe, and considering that the MK News Media is STILL ACTIVE at this point, then it means that the MK News Media is more than likely responsible for the glitching and static here as well as some other instances of it in the smg4 universe, which is valid evidence towards my earlier point regarding IMWTLMOE and the static at the start of the youtube arc. Now with this in mind, we can head into the next off feeling moment in the episode, which is the behavior of the smg4 cast towards smg4 in the episode's first half (upper top left of image 10). You see, the smg4 cast treats smg4 in a pretty similar way to how mario was treated in IMWTLMOE (as shown in the scene at the lower top left of image 10), and considering just how many times I've talked about this episode before, I seriously don't think I have to go over it again, so let's head into the next off instance in the episode. Now the third off instance in this episode occurs when meggy is showing smg4 some rorschach tests, and when she shows smg4 one of them, we see the subtitles show the extra words "crowd clap" between the words remind and of (upper bottom left of image 10), which is bizarre to say the least, even by smg4 standards, and I already know that some of you are saying that this is just an error on smg4's end, but here’s the thing my dear reader, I know errors in entertainment VERY well. In-fact, I have personal experience as an animator myself, and I can CONFIDENTLY say that I've never seen an "error" like this before in any sort of media I've seen or made, and believe it or not, the closest thing I've seen to an error like this is usually a translation error (examples at the lower bottom left of image 10), or someone typing out a story in English after using their first learned language (that isn't English), but there's a difference between a translation error and the supposed error we're seeing here. You see, translation errors and second language english versions of media tend to have more than one spelling or grammar error throughout its sentences or paragraphs, meaning that this supposed error has nothing to do with translation. Now this leaves another question, "if this isn't that kind of error, then what about it potentially being an auto-correct/auto-fill or dictation error (examples of dictation errors at the upper top right of image 10)? Well that would've potentially been the case if it wasn't for the fact that not only are the words crowd and clap way more different than remind and of, but also due to the fact that THERE ISN'T A SPACE AFTER THE WORD CLAP, meaning that it likely isn't a dictation or autocorrect/auto-fill error either. Meaning that this MUST be completely intentional on smg4's part (aside from the missing space between clap and of, for obvious reasons), but here’s the thing, aside from potentially asking us to clap (for some reason), I'm completely unsure as to what the significance of this is, but I'll definitely be keeping it for future use if needed.
Anyways, the final off instance in this episode is that the plot of the episode contradicts itself in the final act as boopkins says that his grandma had died (lower bottom right of image 10), and not his aunt as stated earlier on in this episode (upper bottom right of image 10), which, like the supposed error mentioned earlier, is bizarre, even by smg4 standards. However, I have a slightly crazy, yet plausible explanation for this. You see, I believe that this scene, and by extension, the episode itself are a sort of hidden warning as to what the quality of smg4 episodes will end up being like with the MK News Media in control, with the quality in particular being very bad with plot contradictions, unnecessary "fan service" (as shown with smg4 being abused (upper top left of image 11) (keep in mind that smg4 is now the most hated smg4 character in the fandom (evidence for smg4 being hated is shown at the lower bottom right of image 10)) instead of mario (lower top left of image 11)), and bad humor (upper bottom left of image 11) while still featuring new ideas, which is definitely a horrifying concept if you ask me. Anyways, that should cover the role that MK News Media had in that episode, meaning that we can now discuss the other episode that would cause me to get off of my break early to begin with, "Mario The Exploro."
Now this episode surprisingly only has two major points of note, the first of which being at the very start of the episode itself. During which, we see mario suddenly bring in the puzzlevision TV (lower bottom left of image 11) DESPITE EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED IN THE SAGA'S 4TH ACT! Now I'm pretty sure I REALLY don't need to explain why this is a MASSIVE PLOT CONTRADICTION, so I'll go ahead and explain why mario was behaving like this at the start of the video. You see, I believe the reason as to why mario was behaving like this at the start of the episode mainly involves not only the boarded-up door, but also the deal between mr.puzzles and the MK News Media. Now, as I discussed earlier, the object of power behind the boarded-up door allows the MK News Media to control almost every single element in the smg4 universe, including mario, and the deal that mr.puzzles and the MK News Media made would let mr.puzzles continue to make entertainment after the events of the puzzlevision movie. This means that the MK News Media used mario to grab mr.puzzles's TV head after the events of the puzzlevision movie, which finished the deal that the two entities agreed on, but there's something else I should mention before getting onto the other point of interest in this episode, this being that mr.puzzles is still interested in taking over smg4's channel (upper top right of image 11). Now with this in mind I have two equally plausible predictions as for what this could lead into. You see, explanation/prediction one is that the MK News Media knew that this would happen, meaning that mr.puzzles would be nothing but a distraction for the smg4 cast so that they don't learn what's truly going on from behind the scenes. Now, explanation/prediction number 2 is far more interesting because it suggests that mr.puzzles could be trying to takeover the smg4 channel this time around, so he can destroy the MK News Media out of revenge for the ratings that MK News gave his shows. This would give mr.puzzles a kind of semi-redemption arc where despite being a reoccurring antagonist, he would not only get potential closure over his past (if foul play was involved in his past), but it would also prove to the smg4 cast that he isn't 100% evil, giving a great ending to a fan favorite smg4 character. Now currently, I'm unsure about which explanation is more likely, but I'll hopefully bring up one of these ideas again in a future theory once more evidence is available. Speaking of which, I should move onto the other major point of note in this episode, that being mr.puzzles's character feeling off, almost as if he's a different character altogether. You see, when we see mr.puzzles, he acts far less malicious than he ever was during the adware saga, and instead of being a complete control-freak like how he was before (lower top right of image 11), he is now obsessive over smg4 and wants to give him ideas (upper bottom right of image 11) instead of forcing smg4 to do these ideas against his will, which is a complete 180 from what we saw in the adware saga. Now, this could potentially mean that mr.puzzles MIGHT have been replaced by somebody else entirely. However I believe that this is too much of a stretch, even by my standards, so I'll be leaving this point up for discussion later on if it EVER becomes relevant in the future. Anyways, with that one last point of discussion finished in what I believe the role of the MK News Media has been in the smg4 timeline, we can move onto the evidence for everything that I've discussed in this section of the theory, so let's begin.
Now when discussing the evidence for this section of the theory, I want to start by continuing a kind of tradition in my theories, that being similarities between some of the points of discussion, the predictions for them, and certain well known pieces of media, and yes, we're going over The Truman Show yet again, but for different reasons than you may expect. You see, one of the main reasons why I made this theory the way I did actually involves a certain element of The Truman Show, this being the media shown on the set of The Truman Show itself. Now, there's quite a bit of media in The Truman Show, which ranges from things that are very common nowadays like news segments on tv (Note: APPARENTLY, some nutcase at youtube made it so you can't screenshot certain moments from the film, meaning that I'm unable to supply images for some of these points), or things as old as newspapers (lower bottom right of image 11), BUT they all served the same purpose, MAKING SURE THAT TRUMAN DOESN'T FIGURE OUT WHAT'S TRULY GOING ON. Now, normally I'd bring up how the MK News Media is doing something similar by making sure that the smg4 cast doesn't figure out what's truly going on. HOWEVER, in order to better line it up with the stronger details shown in and after the adware saga, I have decided that instead, I'm going to compare it to the intentions of the MK News Media when regarding the ratings that mr.puzzles recieves throughout the 5-part finale to the adware saga. You see, as I've explained earlier, at the time of the 5-part adware saga finale, the MK News Media was trying to push mr.puzzles into acting the way he does at the time of the puzzlevision movie through the use of news, other media and ratings, which is very similar if not, near identical to what I was explaining earlier when regarding the truman show, which further strengthens my prediction regarding how the MK News Media is using their control over information to cause certain events in the smg4 universe, but this isn't the only similarity that the evidence and my predictions have to The Truman Show. You see, the other major similarity to the truman show that I'd like to discuss is how similar mr.puzzles's return is to that of the return of Truman's "father." You see, in the latter half of the Truman Show's second act, we see Truman's "father", re-appear out of nowhere for ratings (upper top left of image 12) despite the fact that TRUMAN LITERALLY SAW HIM "DIE" WHEN HE WAS A KID (lower top left of image 12), as well as his return genuinely not making that much sense when you consider that truman saw his supposed "father" earlier on in the film (upper bottom left of image 12). Now, you're probably wondering why I'm bringing up this VERY specific scene of the truman show up in my evidence for this theory, and my answer to this is that the return of Truman's "father" is pretty similar to how mr.puzzles returned in the episode "Mario The Exploro." You see, when mr.puzzles returned in Mario The Exploro, his return didn't make all that much sense when you begin to think about it, because not only did mr.puzzles return through the use of mario, a character who actively antagonized him in his shows and wanted to beat the snot out of him during the events of the puzzlevision movie (upper top right of image 12), but also because of the fact that he returned A SINGLE MONTH AFTER THE PUZZLEVISION MOVIE (lower top right of image 12) with barely any build-up towards his return outside of a few community posts (which I'm sure you've seen), which makes his return feel forced, but considering that mr.puzzles's return is pretty similar to what I described earlier regarding the return of Truman's "father," then what if it being forced was the ENTIRE point. After all, if mr.puzzles was just meant to be a distraction for the smg4 cast in order to make sure that they don't figure out that The MK News Media is truly responsible for the events of the adware saga, then mr.puzzles's return a mere month after the adware saga would make perfect sense, strengthening my prediction regarding mr.puzzles's true role in the The MK News Media's grand plan. Anyways, that should cover all the similarities to The Truman Show, so let's head into the rest of the evidence for my predictions in this theory.
Now, you might be wondering why I chose VERY SPECIFIC dates when discussing the fall of the original MK News Media, and believe it or not, I specifically chose the dates in-question (the anime, Rapper Bob, and waluigi arc) because of not only the amount of presence the mushroom kingdom news media had at these times, but also due to some other lesser details that go with it as well. You see, The MK News Media had a decent presence in the waluigi arc, as shown in the waluigi apocalypse, where we see a news reporter discussing the waluigi apocalypse at the start of the episode (upper bottom right of image 12). Now, when it comes to the Rapper Bob arc, we actually don't see the MK news media show up at any point during the arc. Which hints towards them potentially being at risk of bankruptcy at this point in time, which would make a whole lot of sense considering that Rapper Bob was quite literally, the most famous person in the mushroom kingdom during that arc. Now, the anime arc is definitely the most interesting when it comes to the evidence for this theory. This is because we not only see the MK News Media going over how anime is destroying the mushroom kingdom right before peach makes anime illegal, but also because of a small yet very important detail being shown here: THE NEWS REPORTER IS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT THAN THE LAST ONE! (Lower bottom of image 12) The fact that the old news reporter is completely absent during the news discussing anime is a massive red flag for me personally, because if the original employees weren't replaced, then why is KERMIT THE FLIPPING FROG DOING THE NEWS?! It almost seems intentional on smg4's part, which could be the case given that the genesis arc would happen a year or two later, where we'd learn what happened to the multicolored marios. However, the news reporter no longer being there still does strengthen my theory, meaning that it can be used as genuine evidence. Alright, that should finish off the evidence for the dates discussing the fall of the MK News Media, so let's get into the next category of evidence in this section.
Now, when it comes to my evidence as to why the MK News Media would be responsible for mr.puzzles's origins (as mentioned in part one), it mainly involves two inconsistencies with his backstory. You see, mr.puzzles stated that he got his tv head because he apparently decapitated himself before putting a TV where his head used to be (top left of image 13), but there's one major problem with this. You see, when someone is decapitated, they aren't able to control their body (upper bottom left of image 13) (note: it's also implied in the film that mr.puzzles came from a reality like ours, which is makes this inconsistency STAND OUT EVEN MORE (lower bottom left of image 13)), meaning that mr.puzzles wouldn't have been able to put a tv where his head once was, which also means that it's pretty unlikely that he was the person who put the tv in the place of his decapitated head. However, if the MK News Media was somehow able to put the tv where his head used to be, instead of mr.puzzles himself, then mr.puzzles surviving his decapitation would make way more sense in the long run. Now, this brings me into the other inconsistency with mr.puzzles's backstory: If mr.puzzles's tv head was just an average tv that he managed to hook up to where his head used to be, then why does it have ELDRITCH POWERS?! (upper top right of image 13) My answer for this question is that I believe it's HIGHLY likely that The MK News Media gave mr.puzzles his eldritch head to begin with, because it not only would line up perfectly with what I was describing earlier on in this theory regarding the MK News Media, but also because it would explain why the word "Puzzlevision" is on his head to begin with (lower top right of image 13), because it wouldn't make that much sense for mr.puzzles to name his streaming service after the word on his head (uppwd bottom of image 13). Further proving that mr.puzzles's head came from the MK News Media, as well as strengthening my theory.
Now when it comes to my evidence regarding the involvement the MK News Media had in prior events, it mainly lies with how the specific events in question play out. You see, in the first example I mentioned, "Mario's Spicy day," smg4 doesn't try to stop smg3 until he sees smg3's spicy ones video. Now, normally, this wouldn't be all that suspicious. HOWEVER, smg3's video was the only video in his feed (aside from the video he was watching beforehand), which is insanely suspicious, because it subtly implies potential foul play by another entity, which is further strengthened by the glitch that shows up on his computer right before the video plays. Originally, I thought that the static in this scene was caused by mr.puzzles. However, considering that there's evidence towards the MK News Media also being a culprit of the glitches, then it's highly likely that they were the ones responsible for the glitching shown in this scene. Now I've already explained the example with peach and the anime ban, so let's discuss how the MK News Media was responsible for lawyer kong's knowledge of smg4's origins. You see, as I discussed in one of my last theories before I went on break, we NEVER truly learn how lawyer kong obtained his knowledge of smg4's past, or why he didn't decide to go after the meme guardian until after the genesis arc. However, there's a subtle hint towards how he gained his knowledge when we see him show Miyamoto a video while explaining to him what smg4's arrival in the mushroom kingdom caused. You see, right before the video plays we can catch a brief instance of static on lawyer kong's smart device (lower bottom right of image 13), which hints towards another entity potentially giving lawyer kong this information, and like the previous example, I originally thought that mr.puzzles was responsible for this instance, but with the MK News Media also being responsible for some of the static instances in the smg4 timeline, then it's likely that they are responsible for this one as well. Now, when it comes to the last 2 prior events that I connected to the MK News Media earlier on in this theory (IMWTLMOE, and Clown Fever), I actually don't want to discuss how the MK News Media would be responsible for these events because I've gone over these two episodes many times before (especially the former). However, I do want to discuss why the MK News Media would eventually choose to scrap these potential storylines because it actually involves us, aka the viewers. You see, the viewers or in other words, us, seem to be the strongest entities in the smg4 universe because our negative reactions to the lawsuit arc and character redesigns (top of image 14) would end up changing the smg4 universe forever by setting the events of IGBP, and the adware saga in motion (bottom of image 14), and considering that we caused IGBP to happen in the first place, then it's highly likely that our negative reactions to IMWTLMOE and Clown Fever would cause their potential arcs to be scrapped. After all, IMWTLMOE is literally the second lowest rated (on IMDB) smg4 episode ever made, and clown fever was criticized because the clown fever in the episode was too similar to the T-Pose Virus, so it would genuinely make a ton of sense that our negative reactions would cause these storylines to be scrapped. Now, that should cover all of the other pieces of evidence that I have for this theory, but I do want to mention some final predictions that I have for the next major arc/saga in the greater current storyline that we're in.
You see, I believe that the next major part in the current greater storyline is going to be an arc and not a saga. You see, if I'm right about what I mentioned earlier on in this theory, then the story that's going to be told will be too short for it to be a saga, due to it likely being somewhat similar to how the revelations arc played out. In other words, the story will be shorter, building upon what came before in the adware saga, will close up any remaining loose ends from the adware saga, introduce a threat greater than that of the original antagonist, and end the storyline on a very satisfying note. Now, I also believe that this arc is likely going to be 7 episodes long, mainly because it feels like the right amount of episodes needed for this final chapter of the greater storyline, which would give ample time to close off the remaining loose ends while also building off of what we already have from the adware saga. Finally, I believe that the true finale of this storyline will probably be a movie instead of meme games or wotfi 2024. This is because the meme games happens in July, and considering that it's late may as I'm currently writing this, then it's pretty unlikely that the greater storyline will conclude with meme games 2024. As for wotfi 2024, it'd likely be too far off for it to be the saga's finale due to Wotfi usually happening in October, and considering that mr.puzzles has returned already, then it'd be pretty unlikely for the finale to be wotfi 2024, meaning that the finale being a movie is the most likely option. And that should be everything that I wanted to cover, thank you for reading.
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2024.05.27 20:40 SeaIndependent9438 Selling my e39…

Selling my e39…
… well, I’ve finally decided to sell my beloved e39… 1999 540i automatic. I will be moving back to Chicago, and then to California for a new job, and want to get a new car for that stage of my life. I’ve owned this car since 2016, and loved it!
The car has about 162k miles and has been my daily car. It has been very reliable for the most part, especially for the first 5 years of ownership, but I’ve made a few repairs and such over my ownership, including: replacing center bearing shaft at end of 2020, replacing most of the cooling system components in either 2021 or 2022, and replacing the headliner with charcoal grey alcantara. A lot of suspension parts have been replaced as well as I was preparing for a cross country roadtrip in 2020, and that’s also when a tow hitch was installed (original BMW spec, shipped to US from Europe), since I was towing a dual sport motorcycle on a small portable trailer during my roadtrip. I’ve dealt with various more minor repairs as well, such as replacing some AC parts (most recently the AC Cooling Fan), broken window motors, fixing vapor barriers, unclogging sunroof drains, replacing trunk struts, headlight adjusters, and so on.
The car currently drives well, though it does have a check engine light (last I checked I believe it was an O2 sensor). It’s overall in a decent shape given its age, but the paint does have some swirl marks on it, and could use at least a good detailing job. The steering makes noise at low speeds during certain temperatures, not sure what it is, but hasn’t been a problem for me. The interior is in a good condition, but could probably also use a good detailing job (apart from the headliner, which is new as mentioned). Now that I think of it, perhaps I should get it detailed once I am back to Chicago next week.
Everything is stock, except the headliner color, and I also opted to replace the 5 CD changer with a bluetooth / AUX connection in the trunk, so the car now has an AUX cable that connects to your phone to supply it power and play audio. There is bluetooth too but I prefer AUX.
There were two prior owners before me, first one in South or North Carolina, the second one as well, but eventually I bought the car in Chicago from the relatives of the second owner. The car therefore has no rust issues, even though it was kept in Chicago in 2016-2020. It was garage kept roughly half the time in Chicago. I then traveled around US with it during 2020-2021, primarily in warm climates. Came back to Chicago in 2021 and it was garage kept for a year, then it was in Boston 2022-2024 kept in an uncovered parking lot, but there was little snow these past two years, and I was out of Boston for over a month each winter so it wasn’t driven in the snow here even a single time. The previous owners kept all records, and I tried keeping all my repair paperwork as well.
Anyway, let me know if you’re interested or have any questions. I posted it on Autotrader as well for $6200 but am open to offers.
submitted by SeaIndependent9438 to e39 [link] [comments]


2024.05.27 20:37 PrettyWhiteJaws1 The 100 songs that changed our world - Metal Hammer. The Summing is the 100th. 🫶

The 100 songs that changed our world - Metal Hammer. The Summing is the 100th. 🫶 submitted by PrettyWhiteJaws1 to SleepToken [link] [comments]


2024.05.27 11:53 Creative_Koala_8688 Amazon’s Secret Weapon to Drive Traffic — Amazon Posts

As a behemoth of the e-commerce industry, Amazon can ignore the need for sellers to build brand loyalty on its platform in favor of providing speedy deliveries and cheap prices. But when Nike pulled out of its two-year-long pilot program with Amazon in June 2019, citing the inability to build a strong, personal relationship with its customers as the core reason for its exit, Amazon knew it had to address this issue, thus leading to the launch of Amazon Posts.

What is Amazon Posts?

This is Amazon’s second and latest attempt at a social media platform following its disastrous first attempt, “Amazon Spark,” a feature that allowed Prime members to post and share images of items they bought on Amazon. Unlike Spark, Amazon Posts provides sellers control, allowing them to promote their products and brands in a new way. They can differentiate their brands from others and drive sales by targeting competitors’ weaknesses.
Amazon sellers are always trying to utilize the best marketing tactics to drive traffic, generate sales, and improve ranking to grow their business. With posts, Amazon has taken cues from social media’s success in promoting brands and products through beautifully curated, image-driven feeds — “a new browse and discovery experience on Amazon focused on brand-shopping.”
Shoppers can explore brand-specific feeds or browse by product category to discover products and see what’s new from brands. Posts link to detail pages, making each post in a feed shippable.

Amazon Posts Feeds – Why Should Brands Participate?

Create a Distinctive Brand Image: Through Posts, you can now establish your brand’s unique identity, trust, and authority.
Build a Brand Culture: Right from creating inspirational content and using influencer images to cross-posting for your different products and everything in between, you have complete freedom to market your products as you please.
Unlimited Posting: There is no limitation to how many posts you can upload for your brand, making this an easy way to get higher impressions for your product.
Target Your Competitor’s Audience: The best part about Amazon Posts is your competitor’s customer base will view all your posts, thus helping you reach your target audience. Presently, sellers do not have a choice of where or which competitors they can target.
Shoppable Posts: Unlike other social media platforms, shoppers can scroll through a carousel of Posts that each direct back to the brand product-detail page with the option to buy the product
Free: Best of all, Posts are free to participate!

Where Do Amazon Posts Show Up?

It is important to know that currently, shoppers may only view Amazon Posts on a mobile device within the Amazon App. There are four different places in which an Amazon Post can be viewed:
Detail Page Carousel: You’ll see this carousel on every brand listing page with Posts enabled. It’s placed right above the Questions section and showcases up to 10 related posts.
by-productsIf you click on the brand name in the Detail Page Carousel, you’ll reach the Brand feed section of the brand. This is a vertically scrollable section that showcases all the posts created by the brand, where you can not only read the entire post caption but also view the categories that the featured product belongs to.
Category Feeds: By clicking on the category of a post, either from the Brand Feed or the Related Feed, it takes you to all related posts by-products belonging to the same category.
Related Feeds: When you click on the image or the “See More” section of a post on the Detail Page Carousel, you’ll see all the details of that post along with all related posts (by various brands), in a vertical-scroll mode.

How to Get Started With Amazon Posts

Amazon Posts is currently limited to brands that are enrolled under the Amazon Brand Registry and have a store on the U.S. Amazon.com site.
If you meet the above criteria, here’s what you can do to start your Amazon Posts journey:
Creating your Brand Profile for Posts:
Once those few simple steps are completed, you can start publishing posts by uploading photos, captioning them, and tagging related products.
Only single images can be displayed, which is optimal as each image is branded and meant to get users to click straight to your listing with the Show Product tab. Engagement is easily improved by uploading lifestyle and/or product-focused imagery. This helps a customer understand exactly what you are selling quickly, and the first time they come across your Posts.

Amazon Posts Strategy – Types of Amazon Posts

Every Amazon Post has five elements:
Header: This showcases the Brand Logo and Name. Displayed at the top of each Post.
2,200-characterAn exciting image that captures the viewer’s attention.
Caption: Text showcased right below the image, with two lines visible. While it has a 2,200-character limit, we recommend sticking to shorter captions.
Category Tags: Amazon auto-tags posts with relevant product categories, ensuring that your posts are visible in a related Category Feed.
Show product button: When clicked, it automatically shows the product listing and rating to easily learn more and visit the product page.

Amazon Posts Strategy – Types of Amazon Posts

The great thing about Posts is that you can take several angles to promote your products — there are no limits!
Here are a few things that we recommend:
Hows Using lifestyle images and candid photos provides you with better engagement, as people tend to look for realistic posts that they can relate to.
Create Social Proof: Depending upon the type of product you’re selling, create posts and images that show that your product can be trusted. A good example of this would be, if you’re selling kitchen knives, having lifestyle images featuring chefs using your product.
Highlight Features, Benefits, Hows to’s: Draw attention to the various features of your product by creating content that highlights its features, talks about its advantages, or even shows how it can be used.
Repost from Instagram and Facebook: While you can’t ask questions, create polls, and write lengthy posts on Amazon, you can still repost the visual content you use on your other platforms using a tool such as Repost. This way, you can repurpose content without having to create new posts and maintain a consistent brand language across all the different platforms you use.
Explore Different Aspect Ratios: Amazon Posts allows you to use images in 1:1, 16:9, and 4:3 ratio. By switching between these ratios for your different posts, you can gauge audience reaction and explore what works for your brand and what doesn’t.

How to Create Amazon Posts

Creating a post is incredibly easy. Here are the steps for you to follow:

Amazon Posts Best Practices

Ultimately, the success of Posts will be if Amazon shoppers engage with the platform in the first place. However, starting early can have a huge impact on later performance, especially since we’re already seeing a correlation between high post impressions and sales.
Assuming they do, making posts work as best as they can is important.
Post Multiple Times a Day: As a brand new platform, there are still no hard and fast rules about what works and what doesn’t on Posts. Therefore, the more posts you put up, the more eyeballs you grab, and the more data you have to understand what works for your brand.
Use High-Quality Images: As with any social media post, images are what initially catch the consumer’s attention and get them to stop and read (and hopefully buy!). Use everything from lifestyle images to candids to build a great brand story.
Create Compelling Captions: Since Amazon only shows the first two lines of your post by default, create attention-grabbing headlines that help define your brand right at a glance.
Keep Testing: Once posts have been up for a couple of weeks, check the Amazon Post’s metrics. Use them to learn which type of pictures, headlines, copy, and length of copy the audience most responds to, and then replicate the highest performers in new posts.

Conclusion

It’s still in the early days, but Amazon Posts gives sellers a social media-like platform to grow brand awareness and connect with potential customers. By putting in the time and effort now by posting regularly, eager sellers will gain an advantage over their competitors who are not using it.
By combining the three pillars of Amazon PPC Services, combined press release and rebate campaigns, and Amazon Posts, sellers now have a surefire Amazon launch strategy in their hands.
submitted by Creative_Koala_8688 to u/Creative_Koala_8688 [link] [comments]


2024.05.27 01:21 th987 Lets Group Fact Find: the Dec. 28, 2023 Ambulance Ride

Lets Group Fact Find: the Dec. 28, 2023 Ambulance Ride
Update: Discovered I can't edit the headline, but ...
  1. There was no ambulance in the brief video or photos in the tweets that appear to be the source of the supposed Dec. 28 incident involving Kate, despite countless media references to an incident possibly involving Kate and an ambulance on that date.
There was a police vehicle, a dark sedan, a Range Rover and two policemen on motorcycles. No sirens or Emergency lights, no great speed of the vehicles in the brief video, driving, supposedly somewhere in Marylebone in London.
  1. There is nothing we've found but supposition in that single tweet to connect the vehicles in any way to the royal family who were reportedly two hours away at Sandringham.
  2. There's nothing to indicate the vehicles were going to King Edward VII hospital where the royals are often treated or any hospital at all. The tweet said they were traveling in the vicinity, but they were in Central London, traveling within the vicinity of everything in Marylebone and near it.
  3. The man who posted the tweet has nothing in his bio or the tweet to indicate he has any more knowledge of the royal family than anyone else in England. He seems to post positive things about Charles, Camilla, William and Kate, but that doesn't make him unique.
  4. The Spanish TV reporter Concha Calleja mentions a Dec. 28 incident and Kate, but doesn't say anything about her source. No idea to know if it was the tweet.
  5. The only thing I see that lends any importance to the Dec. 28 tweet is that it seems to be the source cited over and over again in rumors in the media it might involve Kate.
  6. The whole Dec. 28 thing seems nothing but an extraordinarily flimsy supposition, and that seems to have started a lot of the speculation that Kate had a secret medical emergency before her Jan. 11 surgery and that it might involve her and William in a fight where she was hurt.
And if that's much of the source of supposition that whatever happened to her was not an illness but her being injured, then ... so much of what came after seems to have little basis in fact.
We have no idea if anything suspicious or criminal happened before her Jan. 11 surgery except how oddly someone tried to prove she was alive and well with the Mother's Day photos and the green screen video where she said she had surgery and was having chemo, but claimed she didn't have cancer.
I truly did not expect to find so little about the Dec. 28 non-ambulance ride. I'm skeptical about much that's reported in the press these days, even rumors. Decades ago, I worked as a newspaper reporter, in the US, no connections to anyone in England or the royals, but as someone who knows how important factual reporting is, this is truly embarrassing if there are no underlying sources to explain why this incident is mentioned so often in the media.
****************
I thought together we might do some internet sleuthing/fact finding.
I started last night with the mysterious thing reported as an ambulance ride. First, I have to say I'm greatly disappointed in what I found. Any link to this involving Kate is very flimsy. It doesn't even show an ambulance! Just a vehicle marked police. So the idea that it's even going to a hospital is total supposition.
Maybe you guys can find more.
The rumor seems to have started with this very short video of a nice black car and a Range Rover traveling slowly and with no sirens on a dark night through the streets of London.
You can see the video here: https://x.com/RVdajdynCrclemN/status/1740443152606196096 which only shows two cars. I tried to imbed it and couldn't. If anyone can, please do so in the comments.
The tweet with video includes the text:
I hope all is well at Sandringham. My spy in Marylebone just saw this convoy heading in the general direction of King Edward VII's Hospital at eight thirty this evening...
followed by one with the three photos, one where you can see the two motorcycle policemen and a police car saying it happened at 8:30 that evening.
I see no other previous source about this.Please post below if you find anything. Other references I saw simply referred back to this tweet as the source.
So, Kate, William and the kids last sighting is widely reported walking into a Christmas church service, published Dec. 25, 2023 and credited to UK Press photographer Mark Cuthbert.
Photo info noted this wasChurch of St. Mary Magdalene in Norfolk. The holiday outing takes place each year — just one of the royal family's Christmas traditions, and that they were joined by Charles, Camilla & other royals.
Odd things about the tweet:
The poster, Brian Moran -- more about him later -- said Sandringham, which is the family estate where they traditionally send Christmas.
But the convoy, as he calls it, is seen only very briefly in the streets in London said to be heading in the general direction of King Edward VII Hospital.
And Sandringham is about a two hour drive from King Edward VII hospital, if that's even where the ambulance is going.
Moran argues that only the royals and the Prime Minister travel in a convoy of vehicles like this one. Other people responding to the tweet say that's not true. (Anyone want to fact find this?)
And I can't figure out any other reason why he saw this convoy on this night heading in this direction and decided it had anything to do with the royal family who was reportedly all at Sandringham.
Honestly, that's it. Could the connection possibly be that flimsy? I was sure there had to be more. The only reason it even seems plausible to link this to Kate having a medical emergency that night is because it's mentioned so frequently and persistently in published media accounts.
So, extremely poor reporting? By everyone who cited it? Or do they have reason to believe or know it was Kate in the ambulance?
Regardless, if you had a medical emergency, would you travel two hours by ambulance to get to this specific hospital? Seems like you wouldn't if it was urgent.
The hospital is known for treating the royals. It's a royal patronage of King Charles, very small, only 56 beds, so good for privacy, and also among the four specialties noted on the its homepage (https://www.kingedwardvii.co.uk) are women's health including gynecology and digestive system health, two possible health problems Kate is facing.
So, she may have had an emergency, but not dire, and decided privacy was a bigger concern and she'd endure the two hour ambulance ride to get to King Edward Hospital. She may have been treated for her current problem there before and wanted that hospital.
But she didn't have her announced January 2024 surgery there. It was at The London Clinic (https://www.thelondonclinic.co.uk), widely reported, not disputed and named often in stories about the breach of Kate's private medical records. FYI: specialties listed on their homepage are breast, urology and gynecology, which would fit Kate's surgery being related to her reproductive organs.
It's described as a luxury hospital also known for expert diagnostics and must treat a lot of patients from overseas, because also on the homepage it mentions being ready to help overseas patients decide about being treated there, so very posh.
It may not have an emergency room. I just thought to check. A search of its website doesn't say anything about an emergency room, so that may be why the tweet mentions the ambulance is heading toward King Edward VII.
Although we don't even know the ambulance was going to King Edward Hospital. It's in the middle of a medical district in the London very posh neighborhood of Marylebone.
I did a search for other hospitals within six blocks of King Edward, and Chat GPT said St. Mary's Hospital, Princess Grace Hospital, Wellington Hospital and Cromwell Hospital.
So, again, royals supposedly were two hours away, nothing to indicate it was Kate or that ambulance came from Sandringham or that it was going to King Edward VII which is known for treating royals.
Again, could it be that flimsy supposition just repeated over and over?
I go back to who is the guy who made the original tweet and does he have any serious credibility. Brian Moran. Here is a screenshot of his twitter page:
https://preview.redd.it/jf1nuyhrnu2d1.png?width=2560&format=png&auto=webp&s=4a1d9117b774ff4282bfa2d65566e659a1ae6c13
Not many followers, not following many people, but a long-standing account. Practically no biographical information. I glanced at who he follows, some media people, some people who cover or talk about liking the royals, a few British politicians, nothing that jumped out at me as noteworthy.
I looked through his posts. He seems to be a supporter of William and Kate, posts things criticizing or mocking Harry and Meghan, posts a bit about British politics, some British sports, some silly stuff.
I tried a search on his name and London and his twitter handle, nothing. Not specific enough or anyone of note with just his name and London.
There's a Brian Moran who's had a long career in finance and is currently a partner andHead of Investor Relations at Rehoboth Property Group. His bio says he oversees all communications with existing investors and onboarding new clients.
There's a Brian Moran who's a long time real estate agent near London. Another who's CEO of a property group.
Oh, the guy who owns the website BrianMoran.com calls himself an entrepreneur and seems to wants to sell you on his course in how you can be an entrepreneur. I looked quickly and saw no indication of where he lives.
Honestly, I have no idea who this guy is or why so many media sources were willing to reference his tweet about the ambulance in stories about Kate.
I truly can't believe all this speculation came from this tweet with such a flimsy tie to the royals as one guy claiming the convoy probably has a senior royal or the prime minister, that it could have possibly come from Sandringham and been possibly been headed for King Edward VII.
We don't know Kate actually was hospitalized anywhere then.
Please tell me one of you can find some other information about why we've kept hearing about this ambulance ride.
EDITED to ADD: should have included, the tweet info says it has 1.3 million views and was retweeted 416 times. He left it up to be retweeted and viewed that many times and referenced in the media for months with no other real information linking it to Kate or the royals?
submitted by th987 to KateMiddletonMissing [link] [comments]


2024.05.26 22:29 littlelulumcd Billboard's Woman of the Decade award: Revisiting Taylor's speech

Billboard's Woman of the Decade award: Revisiting Taylor's speech
As discussed in my most recent post, I’m continuing my journey of revisiting Taylor’s past. I think it is one of the keys to understanding the story Taylor tried to tell before and the story she is telling today.
Also, in the words of the Manuscript:
And the years passed
Like scenes of a show
The Professor said to write what you know
Lookin' backwards
Might be the only way to move forward
Before I get to the speech, a reminder on some events that took place before the Woman of the Decade award was given to Taylor.
Speech context
Taylor announced her plan to rerecord her first six albums on August 21, 2109 - ✌🏻days before Lover was released.
The Billboard Woman of the Decade ceremony took place on December 12, 2109. AKA, the night before Taylor turned 30. I mentioned in my AMA post that I’m not sure when these types of awards are decided, but I can’t help thinking about what could have been if this award was given to Taylor post coming out. And what that might have looked like.
In the lead up to the AMAs, Taylor had a public battle with both SBs because they wouldn’t grant her permission to sing any songs from her first six albums when she performed at the awards show.
On November 14th, Taylor tweeted about the fight and then, rightly or wrongly, Taylor asked her fans to let the SBs know how they felt about that decision. Swifties definitely answered that call.
Four days later, Big Machine granted her permission to perform any song she wanted - at least for that one night. How lucky for her 🙄
Speech Analysis
In the spirit of full disclosure, what first caught my eye about Taylor’s speech is her outfit. While yes, I do think she looks amazing lol, I thought her outfit was purple which would have pointed to my theory that “Speak Now connects to everything”, but my research tells me the outfit is a dark blue.
(Unhinged 🤡 theory: maybe the outfit really is purple, and this is the origin of the Taylor trying to convince us that her blood in the Anti-Hero video is midnight blue instead of glittery purple, hahahaha)
That being said, even though the outfit isn’t purple, I want to note that her hair is in a braid. There have been a lot of theories about what braids can mean, or what Taylor is trying to signal when she wears one. Braids have been showing up for a while. For the purposes of this look back, I want to point a recent post from u/Kit10phish.
Specifically this part of what they wrote:
I subscribe to the braid theory Braded-Lyrics: Each song has many different strands woven together: Muse, music industry, fans, sometimes historical events or mythology.
I definitely agree with this take, and I also think the theory extends to more than lyrics. I think there is a lot the Billboard’s Woman of the Decade speech that (either planned or not), foreshadows and ties together things we’ve seen play out over the last 5 years.
We know at this point that Taylor had decided to rerecord her first six albums. I also think Ms. Mastermind had a plan for how she thought it would play out and also had a plan to make sure she felt she could come out at the end ,or, within the rerecording process. Obviously COVID threw a wrench into those plans - I don’t think folklore and evermore were planned. I don’t even necessarily believe that she had Midnights or TTPD fully formed at this point, but I do think she had some idea of what she wanted to do.
With all of that in mind, let’s get to the speech. If you want to read a transcript of it, you can here.
I’m not going to go through everything, instead I will highlight what I think is relevant. If you think I’ve missed anything, feel free to let me know! When sharing quotes, I will be bolding certain parts for emphasis.
I was going to go chronologically at first, but I want discuss at the top what I think is a big elephant in the room given TK’s response to the shitty comments his teammate made.
Here is what TK said:
“I call him Harry, I might be the only person who calls him Harry,” he said. “That just tells you, I mean, I’ve known him for seven-plus, eight-plus years and I cherish him as a teammate… He’s treated friends and family that I’ve introduced to him with nothing but respect and kindness and that’s how he treats everyone.”
He acknowledged that when it came to what Butker said at the commencement, those were the football kicker’s “views”. Travis also clarified that while he didn’t have the same beliefs as Butker, he wouldn’t scrutinize his friend for his views.
“I can’t say I agree with the majority of it, or just about any of it, outside of just him loving his family or his kids,” he continued. “And I don’t think I should judge him by his views, especially his religious views of how he goes about life. That’s just not who I am.”
And here is what Taylor said about Scooter Braun during her Woman of the Decade speech
I’m fairly certain he knew exactly how I would feel about it though. And let me just say that the definition of the toxic male privilege in our industry is people saying, ‘But he’s always been nice to me,’ when I’m raising valid concerns about artists and their rights to own their music. And of course he’s nice to you. If you’re in this room, you have something he needs.
I don’t expect Taylor to have a response to what TK said - and I don’t even believe she should be held accountable for what he said, a stance I’ve maintained since the MH era. Men need to be held accountable for what they say, not the women in their life - buuuuuuuuuuuuut, with all that in mind, I hope Taylor remembers making this speech because her boy is doing exactly what she called out.
Almost word for word.
I think Taylor would do well to remember what she said when she stood on a stage calling out the people in her life who said that about SB. And I hope she is taking TK to task for his lack of courage.
I don’t think the controversy with TK’s teammate is manufactured to play into Taylor’s narrative, but I do think if Taylor does distance herself from him because of this, I would be OK with that. In fact, in some ways I think she needs to, otherwise she should rightfully get called out for being a hypocrite.
Let’s address the second elephant in the room, Billie Eilish.
If you aren’t caught up, there seems to be some shade coming from Billie/her camp about Taylor. I very much dislike when female artists are pitted against each other (something Taylor has called the media out for in the past) because when say, Kendrick and Drake are “feuding” the language around what is happening is very different when women are having a public disagreement.
That all being said, nothing seems to be coming from Taylor’s camp and from what I’ve seen, the comments Billie made about three hour concerts was taken out of context. I also think Billie’s manager (who liked a twitter thread calling out Taylor for blocking other artists), could be making a point that Billie herself doesn’t believe. Much like the rebuttal for the NYT’s Gaylor piece seemed to come from people in Taylor’s camp, not necessarily from Taylor herself.
Before Taylor discuss Billie in her speech, she names a number of newer female artists in the music industry that she is a fan of and Billie is included on that list
And I see that fire in the newer faces in our music industry whose work I absolutely love. I see it in Lizzo, Rosalia, Tayla Parx, Hayley Kiyoko, King Princess, Camila Cabello, Halsey, Megan Thee Stallion, Princess Nokia, Nina Nesbitt, Sigrid, Normani, H.E.R., Maggie Rogers, Becky G, Dua Lipa, Ella Mai, Billie Eilish. And so many other amazing women who are making music right now.
This is what she had to say about Billie specifically
This speech I’m referring to was on my 25th birthday. I’m about to turn 30 tonight, woo! But my exact quote during the speech was, ‘I really just feel like we need to continue to try to offer something to a younger generation of musicians, because somewhere right now your future Woman of the Year is probably sitting in a piano lesson or in a girls’ choir “and today right now we need to take care of her.’
I’ve since learned that at that exact moment, an 11-year-old girl in California really was taking piano lessons and really was in a girls’ choir. And this year she has been named Woman of the Year at the age of 17. Her name is Billie.
Sure, a lot of things could have happened in the last 5 years, and maybe Taylor and Billie do have “beef”, or, it could be that the music/tabloid industry is trying to create bad blood where none exists.
With those two points out of the way, let me get to the other parts of the speech that caught my attention.
Let’s start with the cringe. Oh, the cringe. I am doing my best to embrace my own cringe because I have a lot of it, but hoo boy, the speech has some very cringey moments. I think her points are valid of course, but I also think she is performing. I think she is still processing what happened to her with the masters sale/failed coming out attempt, but she doesn’t want people to know the pain she was in and potentially what she has planned. So instead, she comes across as over the top.
Some of her posturing reminds me of the meme that Better than Revenge/SN Taylor was/is scary. Specifically I’d see people point to her reaction at around the one minute mark of this video
Which further reminds me of the quote from Taylor’s Time Person of the Year interview
“Ultimately, we can convolute it all we want, or try to overcomplicate it, but there’s only one question." Here, she adopts a booming voice. “Are you not entertained?”
Like, what was the reason for that? lol
Again, these examples seem to point to Taylor performing and/or hiding the true intent of what she’s talking about.
Now, let’s discuss this possible “aha” moment I had
When this decade began I was 20 years old
Which made me think of Daylight
I've been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night
And now I see daylight, I only see daylight
I wonder if that reference in Daylight isn’t about a timespan, but a reference to Taylor at 20 years old.
That is the age she finished writing Speak Now. Also, the age when I think she decided to stay closeted instead of writing songs about girls, like she wanted.
Daylight already breaks my heart because it was the original name for TS7 and what many people (myself included) believe was her coming out song. She thought when Daylight was released she’d finally be out of the closeting darkness she’d been in since she was 20 years old. And then, she wasn’t.
As a quick side note, there are at least two other references to 20 years in Taylor’s music that I think could be a reference to Taylor deciding to closet at that age
https://preview.redd.it/oynjd0z4ut2d1.png?width=1266&format=png&auto=webp&s=dbcf43e89988784527f7071faef30aa6a05f2340
Moving on to what I think is a prelude to folklore
I saw that people love to explain away a woman’s success in the music industry, and I saw something in me change due to this realization. This was the decade when I became a mirror for my detractors. Whatever they decided I couldn’t do is exactly what I did
This is like the thesis statement for mirrorball. Not only that though, in the following sentence she tells us that if someone tells her she can’t do something (like stopping her multiple times from coming out as an example for no reason whatsoever), she is going to take that as a challenge and do it anyway.
It could also be a reference to a lot of the mirrors/mirror imagery/coming back around vibes that have been all over Midnights, TTPD, recent music videos, and the Eras tour.
This quote I believe is referenced in the Bejeweled mv
At that time I couldn’t understand why this wave of harsh criticism had hit me so hard. I believe a popular headline back then was, ‘A Swift Backlash,’ which is clever, you gotta give it to ’em
Laura Dern as the stepmother in the mv: “He tired of her quite quickly or should I say swiftly?”
Taylor’s response: “There it is. That joke never gets old. Thank you, thank you so much.”
Taylor directly references Speak Now in her speech
So then I decided that I would be the only songwriter on my third album, Speak Now, and that I would tour constantly, work on my vocals every day, and perfect my stamina in a live show. I decided I would be what they said I couldn’t be. I didn’t know then that soon enough people would decide on something else I wasn’t quite doing right, and then the circle would keep going on and on and rolling along and I would keep accommodating, over-correcting, in an effort to appease my critics.
And what prey tell, Taylor, are you referencing here? 👀🌈
This part gave me a chuckle
They’re saying I’m dating too much in my 20s? Okay, I’ll stop, I’ll just be single. For years.
For years you say? When exactly? lol There was about a two year gap between her publicly dating Harry Styles and Calvin Harris, but the way Taylor says it implies something longer than two years. Maybe this was her planting seeds for the public to start questioning her public narrative? 🤷🏻‍♀️
Here’s another head scratcher for me
Now it’s that I’m showing you too many pictures of me with my friends, okay, I can stop doing that too. Now I’m actually a calculated manipulator rather than a smart businesswoman? Okay, I’ll disappear from public view for years. Now I’m being cast a villain to you? Okay, here’s an album called Reputation and there are lots of snakes everywhere.
I find it very interesting she is saying that disappearing from the public eye was a calculated move as opposed to a decision she made with Joe to keep their relationship private. Again, in contradiction to her public narrative - especially post Toe breakup.
She has amazing things to say about Lana del Ray, who we now know she worked with for Midnights.
I’ve watched as one of my favorite artists of this decade, Lana Del Rey, was ruthly criticized…in her early career and then slowly but surely she turned into, in my opinion, the most influential artist in pop. Her vocal stylings, her lyrics, her aesthetics, they’ve been echoed and repurposed in every corner of music, and this year her incredible album is nominated for Album of the Year at the Grammys because she just kept making art. And that example should inspire all of us, that the only way forward is forward motion. That we shouldn’t let obstacles like criticism slow down the creative forces that drive us.
The highlighted line is the opposite of what she says in the Manuscript, which I referenced at the beginning of this post. I think her mindset has changed since she started rerecording her first six albums and since she recorded the new albums she released since this speech. I think Taylor has realized that she can’t move forward without addressing the past and she can’t move on until she’s corrected the past, which I think she is doing now.
This quote certainly hits different now
Lately there’s been a new shift that has affected me personally and that I feel is a potentially harmful force in our industry, and as your resident loud person, I feel the need to bring it up.
Hahahahaha. Sorry, Tay, I love you and I’ve defended you for not being outspoken, but this is objectively funny. And does feed into the narrative that Taylor is only loud on something that affects her.
In the gay way though, that line is 👀🌈
To Taylor’s credit, for this speech, she has no issues calling out, by name, those who she feels have benefitted from the sale of her masers and how they have taken her art from her, art that she had her hand in creating.
For me, this quote foreshadows the use of You Don’t Own Me before the Eras concert starts. The added context of Lesley Gore being a closeted lesbian has always felt very on point as well.
The fact is that private equity is what enabled this man to think, according to his own social media post, that he could buy me. But I’m obviously not going willingly. Yet the most amazing thing was to discover that it would be the women in our industry who would have my back and show me the most vocal support at one of the most difficult times, and I will never, ever forget it. Like, ever.
Taylor wanting to change the music industry is another reason I think she will come out. I know how wronged she feels by it, never mind the stories we’ve heard from other musicians, and even scarier, the stories we never hear.
And those are the stories we need to think about every day as we do our jobs within this industry. The ones where people’s dreams come true and they get to create music and play it for people. The ones where fans feel a connection to music that makes their day easier, makes their night more fun, makes their love feel more sacred, or their heartache feel less isolating. The ones where all of you in this room stand as an example for someone else in the next generation who loves the same thing that we love. Music. And no matter what else enters the conversation, we will always bring it back to music.
Finally let’s get to the last bit of seed planting that i think Taylor did this night.
During her Eras show in Melbourne on February 18th, Taylor announced a change to the acoustic set
I’ve been thinking, I want to be as creative as possible with the acoustic set moving forward. I don’t wanna limit anything and say, ‘Oh, if I’ve played a song before I can’t play it again.’ So from now on, I don’t wanna take any paint colors out of the paint box of colors … I want to be able to play songs more than once if I feel like it, and I wanna be able to make changes to songs
The bolded part makes me 👀🌈 lol
Since Paris N1, she has made a point when discussing the acoustic set to say rules aren’t for her anymore 👀🌈
This is the last line of her Woman of the Decade speech
And as for me, lately I’ve been focusing less on doing what they say I can’t do and more on doing whatever the hell I want.
If that line is foreshadowing, then I think we are all in for one hell of a ride.
Starting with Pride this month and June 13th in particular 🌈🤡
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2024.05.26 19:56 disco-dingus My best friend is obsessed with The 27 Club

TW: Suicide themes
It all started the day we found Charlie’s sister in the barn.
Erica had returned to our little town from the city to celebrate her 27th birthday. She was sporting a nose ring and had choppy black hair. She had brought her boyfriend Blake with her, with his long black hair and dark wayfarers. Charlie and I were 14 at the time and thought they looked like rock stars.
Their parents had arranged a party on the grounds of their property. Charlie and I had our first taste of alcohol that night and coughed our guts up when Erica and Blake let us take drags of their cigarettes.
“I love you, Chaz,” said Erica, her arms around Charlie and me. “You too, Glen. Promise me you boys will do whatever makes you happy.”
We had no idea it was her way of saying goodbye.
The next day, there was confusion in the house when Erica and Blake were nowhere to be seen. They’d spent the night in her old bedroom. I’d spent the night on Charlie’s bedroom floor.
“Did you see your sister leave?” asked his mom. We hadn’t. She wasn’t answering her cell either.
Later that day, Charlie and I went to the barn to look for Erica. When we opened the doors, we saw her lying in the arms of Blake on a bed of straw. We put it down to too much vodka.
“We found them,” yelled Charlie. “Wake up, sleepy heads!” As we got closer, we saw an empty bottle of vodka, along with a small empty pot for high-strength sleeping pills, the kind for prescription only.
“Erica,” said Charlie, shaking his sister. She was out cold. “Glen, she’s not breathing!”
Blake started to stir like he was in pain.
“Mr and Mrs Morgan!!” I screamed, running out of the barn.
Erica and Blake were rushed to the hospital. As feared, Erica was dead at the scene. Blake had his stomach pumped and was put in a ward to recover.
“She wanted this,” he managed through god knows what other drugs they had put him on.
“What the fuck do you mean,” said Erica’s dad, grabbing Blake by the front of his smock. He had to be escorted out in tears along with his wife. I sat with Charlie until my parents could come pick me up. We just stared at Blake, this guy who we had thought was so cool, pale with greasy black hair plastered to his face.
“She got in, dudes,” he said.
“”What did she get in?” said Charlie, close to tears. “My sister is dead.”
“But she’s with them now.” He looked up. “Morrison, Joplin, Hendrix…”
“Who are you talking about?” I said.
“Only the greatest to ever live. The 27 Club.” He stepped out of bed, wincing, pulling out the tubes in his arms. I still remember the trickles of blood running down his wrists.
“What the hell is The 27 Club?”
“Strictly members only,” he said. “No admittance to anyone even a day before or after turning 27. I turned two weeks ago, and we were saving it to go together. Forever 27 with the legends.”
He walked to the window. “Say, what floor are we on?”
I shrugged. “Sixth I think.”
He looked out and turned with a grin. “I bet she’s up there partying with Cobain as we speak.” He opened the window,
“Blake,“ said Charlie. “I think you should get back in bed.
“Forever 27 boys,” he said. “See you in a few years.”
He leapt from the window, making Charlie and I cry out in unison. We heard a gruesome thud as he hit something hard. When I braved a peek, he was face down on the roof of an ambulance.
After the events, Charlie became obsessed with “The 27 Club”. When we turned 16, he wanted to form a suicide pact. We would wait until we both turned 27, then end it together.
“These people meant nothing to you,” I said. “When did you ever talk about The Doors, or Jimi Handrix? And everyone has those fucking Nirvana T-Shirts. it means nothing!”
“It’s not just that, Glen,” he said. “It’s honoring my sister. You loved Erica too.”
“I did, but she had problems, Charlie. It’s not even a real club. It’s not a conspiracy. It’s not some amazing club where they’re all living it up in paradise. They're unfortunate coincidences. Plenty of other cool people have died at 26, or 28.”
Before I could react he pulled out a pen knife and sliced open my right palm. I screamed.
“Jesus, what the fuck Charlie!”
He did the same to himself, barely reacted to the pain, then gripped my hand in his.
“Forever 27. We’re bound by blood now, my brother.”
“You’re fucking crazy,” I said, leaving his house. My hand kept slipping on the handle bar of my bike until I got home to patch myself up.
Some years passed, and I’d kept my distance from Charlie. I started college and got a new circle of friends. I remember July 23rd 2011 like it was yesterday. I was 21. Even before Charlie texted me, I knew he would as soon as I heard the news.
Amy Winehouse is dead. She was 27.
The scar on my right palm began to ache. I wasn’t going to contribute to crazy, so I ignored him. I met with my girlfriend Lori and our group of friends for a night out. Of course, Winehouse was the topic of the evening. She had managed to become a cultural phenomenon in such a short amount of time, and her death was genuinely hard hitting. And what better way to celebrate the life of a tortured soul than by keeping the drinks flowing and partaking in the coke our friend Shane had scored.
“Are you guys familiar with the concept of the 27 club?” asked Lori. I swallowed my whisky and cleared my throat.
“Yeah, that’s an exclusive group of celebrities who croaked it at 27, right?” said Shane.
“Exactly,” she said. “Anyone who’s anyone is part of that club.” She held up a glass. “To Amy, and the 27 club!”
“Here here,” said Shane. “May she forever shoot up with my idol, Kurt Cobain, in that big club in the sky.”
“That’s a bit insensitive,” I said. “She literally died hours ago. Have some respect.”
“I’m respecting, buddy,” he said. “This is all for her.”
“Are you OK, Glen,” said Lori. My palm was burning. I ran a finger over the scar and held it up to them.
“I never told you how I got this,” I said. “My childhood best friend, Charlie. His sister killed herself when she was 27. Her boyfriend, too.”
“Shit,” said Shane.
“Charlie did this to me when we were 16. He cut my hand and made us blood brothers. He wanted me to make a suicide pact, that we would end it at 27.”
“Glen, I had no idea,” said Lori.
“I pushed it away,” I said. “I cut all ties with him. But he texted me today, funnily enough, on the day the 27 club gets a new member.”
“I feel awful,” said Shane. “If I’d known, I wouldn't have…”
“Look, it’s fine,” I said. “I’m all for celebrating life or death. I guess I’m just being sensitive. It kind of all came back.”
A few more years passed. Lori and I were married and had a baby boy, Jack. We lived in a house not a million miles away from where I grew up.
One week, I was feeling particularly agitated, and I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. I realized what it was when I spoke to my mom on the phone.
“Will you be seeing Charlie for his birthday?” she asked. “I know you boys don’t see each other as much as you used to, but you were inseparable once upon a time. I hear it’s the big two-seven. He could probably use the support, what with… well, you know.”
“I’ll message him,” I said before saying goodbye. I didn’t want to be a prick, so I kept it polite.
Hey Charlie, I wish you a happy birthday. Maybe we can meet for a drink sometime soon. I’m only like two hours away from our old town. Love, Glen.
About an hour later, I got a notification.
Glen, my brother. Thank you for the birthday wishes. I hear you have a little one of your own now. Me too! Little Joseph. I would love to meet for a drink sometime. You stay in touch. Love, your friend Charlie.
What was most surprising about it was that he didn’t mention his age at all. There was no “I’m 27 now, and you know what that means…” Years of guilt hit me like a sledgehammer to the teeth. I had neglected who was once my most important friend due to an admittedly messed up experience, but clearly one he could have used more support with. I had abandoned him. The scar on my hand burned as if to remind me of the wrong I’d done to him.
A few days later, I reached out again. I suggested we meet at one of our old haunts, but he invited me to his home on account of watching his son. He was still based in our old town and had a nice but modest house.
“Courtesy of the ‘rents,” he said. Charlie’s parents had done rather well for themselves and owned several properties around town. “I’d like you to meet someone.”
There was a basket perched on a wooden frame, and out he pulled a baby wrapped in a blanket. His little eyes were half open.
“This is Joseph. Say hello to your uncle Glen.” He handed Joseph to me, who I awkwardly cradled in my arms until I found the right position.
“He’s the spit of you, Charlie,” I said, looking down at his cute little face. He reached up and grabbed my nose with his sharp baby nails. “Forgot how much that stings,” I said. “Jack is currently enjoying his terrible twos. He’s a bit of a handful for Lori and myself at times.”
“Come sit down,” he said. “How is the old ball and chain?”
I laughed. “She’s actually perfect. I can’t recall a single disagreement we had, other than what to name Jack. She wanted to name him Donald after her grandfather. That wasn’t going to happen.” He laughed. “Where’s your better half, anyway? I don’t think we ever met.”
He looked down. “Suzie. She’s no longer with us. It’s just little Joey and me.”
“Charlie, I’m so sorry.”
“It wasn’t long after his birth. She just didn’t wake up one morning.” He smiled. “We disagreed about his name, too. I wanted to name him Joseph after Joseph Merrick, more commonly known as “The Elephant Man”. He was the first official member of the 27 club.”
I took in a deep breath as I felt unease set in. “Charlie, you can’t still be obsessed with that club.”
He reached over and took Joseph from me. “Did you hear Anton Yelchin is also a member now? Don’t try and tell me it’s not real.”
“Okay, I’m gonna leave you to it,” I said. “Charlie, promise me you’ll look after yourself and Joseph. You know where I am if you need any help.”
“Appreciated,” he said, laying Joseph down in the basket. “Say, isn’t your birthday coming up soon?”
I gulped. “Yeah, in a few weeks. Lori and I are having a weekend in the Hamptons.” I lied.
“Ah, good for you,” he said. “I hope the weather holds out for you.” He held out his hand palm side up, clearly showing me the scar we shared. “Put it there, brother.”
I firmly yet quickly shook his hand and made my way out of his house.
“He’s still not right,” I said to Lori later that evening. “It’s been over 10 years and he’s still obsessed with that fucking club.”
“Try to be more sensitive, Glen. He lost his sister, and now his wife too. As well as raising a baby on his own. The poor guy is probably so lost right now.”
“I’m trying, Lori. But that little reminder of my birthday didn’t sit right with me. It was like ‘remember what that means’. The thing is, it means nothing to me. I didn't agree to a damn thing! I didn’t ask for this scar!”
She kissed the top of my head. “I’m putting Jack to bed, then taking a bath. Why don’t you listen to one of your podcasts? Take your mind off things.”
“Good idea, honey,” I said. “But not before the tickle monster attacks!” I grabbed Jack and blew raspberries on his belly, which sent him into fits of giggles.
“Okay, that’s enough excitement for one day,” said Lori.
“Give me a hug,” I said to Jack. “Goodnight buddy.”
“Night daddy,” he said, then disappeared upstairs with Lori.
I put in my earbuds and started listening to the latest "How Bizarre" podcast. I was content for all of ten minutes when I started thinking about Charlie.
I opened Google and typed in Charlie Morgan, followed by our hometown. One of the first results was from a local newspaper. The headline was something like “[Redacted] man becomes single father after sudden tragedy.” It mentioned his wife Suzie had passed away from breathing complications during sleep. My heart skipped a beat when I read she was 27 at the time of death. I then started to groan as my scar burned as if freshly cut.
I knew in my heart Charlie was responsible for Suzie’s death. I was turning 27 in just over two weeks. I called my mom.
“You sound agitated, sweetheart,” she said. “What’s the matter?”
“Why didn’t you tell me about Charlie’s wife?”
“I did! I mentioned how he’s had a rough go of it in life, but you didn’t seem to be interested. Too occupied with childish rivalries or whatever you call it.”
I felt terrible. “I’m sorry, mother. Did you attend the funeral?”
“I did. Don’t worry, I mentioned how busy you were and you would have been there if you could.”
“Mom, do you think there’s any chance Charlie knows where we live?”
“Would that be a bad thing? You were best friends, after all.”
“Can you just answer me, please?”
“Yes, he knows where you live. Was I not supposed to tell him during his crisis? Should I have read your mind?”
“No, no. I’m sorry, mom. I’m not mad. Look, Lori and I are thinking of going to the Hamptons for my birthday weekend. Would you be able to have Jack?”
“You mean I get to spend the whole weekend with my little Jackie boo?”
That was a 100% yes. When Lori came downstairs after her bath, I grabbed her. She let out a little yelp.
“You haven’t made plans for my birthday, have you?”
“No, not yet. I was thinking of having everyone over for a BBQ, bouncy castle for the kids, bucking bronco for the big kids.”
“How about we get away, just the two of us. Go to the Hamptons and rent a romantic cottage on the beach.”
“How bourgeois,” she chuckled. “Should we rent a garish Lamborghini too?”
I laughed. “If you want? My folks have already said they’ll have Jack for the weekend.”
My birthday came around on a Friday. That morning, Lori drove Jack to my parents’ while I finished packing our weekend bags. Lori has already specifically picked out some fancy dresses to show off to the “douchebags who summer in the Hamptons”. I think she was looking forward to seeing how the other half lived, and making snide remarks behind their backs. I was also in charge of collecting our neon green Lamborghini, which got the whole neighborhood snooping as I pulled it into our driveway.
After an hour or so, Lori hadn’t returned. I just assumed mom and dad were chewing her ears off, so I gave her a call. It went straight to voicemail. so I called my mom instead.
“Is Lori still with you?” I asked. “We kinda need to get on the road.”
“No, sweetheart. We haven’t seen Lori yet.”
My heart dropped. “She left over an hour ago.”
“Oh, my. Maybe she stopped for gas or something.”
“For an hour?”
“Don’t snap at me, Glen. There could be traffic. I’m sure she’s fine.”
“You’re right, I’m sorry. I’ll keep trying her cell. Please let me know when she gets to you.”
My stomach was in knots as I hung up and tried Lori’s cell again. Three hours of calls and texts later, nothing. I kept checking local traffic news to see if there was congestion, or god forbid an accident.
“Mom, I’m so worried,” I said, calling her back. “Do you think I should call the police?”
“Oh sweetheart, I don’t think they’d do anything after a few hours. Stay positive.”
My mind kept going to Charlie. It was my 27th birthday, after all. I dialled his cell.
“Glen,” he answered. “Happy Birthday, my brother,” I could hear the rumblings of an engine in the background.
“Is this a bad time?” I asked. “Are you driving?”
“Oh no, it’s the perfect time. I’m not driving. But hold on, I’ll just put you on to the driver.”
After a few seconds, I heard her.
“Glen, we’re okay. We’re driving to…”
It was Lori, but she was cut off short. “Okay, that’s enough.”
“What the fuck have you done, Charlie,” I spat down the phone. “You bring my family back now!”
“Do you know how kind your wife is?” he said. “She saw me on the side of the road and stopped to give me a ride. Such a sweetie. She told me all about your little birthday getaway and, well, I had to insist on being there myself. I couldn’t miss your 27th after all.”
My stomach was in knots. “Please Charlie. Please bring them back to me.”
“I think you should come here,” he said. “We'll be at the cottage in around 3 hours or so. I heard you have some wheels of your own. Sounds like you’ll be travelling in style.”
“Charlie,” I pleaded. “I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry for your sister. I’m sorry for abandoning you. Please, just come back to me. Let’s talk about it man to man.”
“You’ll either be there, or not. But if not, I’ve got another little friend who would love to make acquaintances with Lori and Jack.” I heard a click.
“He has a gun, Glen,” said Lori.
“I’m coming. Just don’t hurt them, Charlie. Please. I’m coming.”
“Good. Oh, and no police and all that shit of course. You know how it goes. See you later, brother.”
He hung up. I inhaled a sharp breath and screamed into the house. The first thing I did was collect the handgun we kept on the top shelf of our bedroom closet. Then I went downstairs and spotted a handmade birthday card from Jack on the kitchen counter, with a cupcake next to it. You could see Lori’s influence in the words as she had guided his little hand with a paintbrush.
Happy Birthday to the best daddy in the world
I fought back the tears, shoved the delicious cupcake into my mouth, and got into that ugly assed Lamborghini, putting my foot down and raising my middle finger at the neighborhood watch who shook their fists at me.
It took me 4 hours to reach the cottage in the Hamptons we’d rented on Airbnb. I put the gun down the front of my pants and walked inside, my heart ready to explode. I was greeted by the smell of rich tomato sauce. Lori was sitting at a dining chair, her hands strapped to the sides with thick twine. Charlie was standing over the cooker, stirring a saucepan. I could see a playpen with Jack sitting up playing with toys, and baby Joseph was lying on his back, waving his arms around.
“I’m here,” I said, making my presence known. Lori went from looking terrified to mild relief.
“Oh, I heard that god-awful car pull up,” said Charlie. “Half the neighborhood probably did. You’re just in time. I made pasta.”
“Thanks and all, but I’m not hungry.” I went straight over to Lori. “Are you hurt?”
She shook her head. “No, honey. I’m fine. Jack’s fine, too.”
I kissed her and went over to the playpen. Jack giggled when he saw me, holding up a plastic dinosaur. Joseph clung on to a plush toy of a blue dog.
“Don’t they look so cute together?” said Charlie. “Brothers from a different mother, just like us.”
I pulled the gun from my pants and turned to face Charlie. “You’re not the Charlie I called my best friend for years. You need help. This obsession has gone on long enough. Tell me, did you kill your wife?”
“What?” said Lori from the table.
Charlie grinned. “I forget how clever you are. You were always the brains, helping me with homework and stupid math tests that mean absolutely nothing.”
“I loved you, Charlie. But this is too much. So I’m taking my wife, and I’m taking my son. I think under the circumstances we’ll be taking Joseph, too. I sincerely hope you get the help you need so one day he can have a relationship with his dad.”
I walked over to Lori, but she yelled out “Wait!”
Charlie started to laugh. “Did you think it would be that easy? Just look inside her blouse.”
I peeked inside and saw an electronic device strapped to her chest. It had a numerical display that was counting down. There were 46 minutes remaining.
“If she moves from that spot before the timer runs out, a shot of adrenalin will be pumped into her heart. We’re talking about an insane amount of adrenaline. Enough to knock out an elephant. She simply won’t make it.”
“What do you want from me?” I yelled.
He walked towards me and took the gun from my hand, putting it on the table. Then he held up his scarred palm and held it against mine. That burning sensation came back.
“I want us to share a bottle, then live up to our pact.”
“But I didn’t make the pact!” I screamed. “You forced it on me.”
“Come on, Glen. We owe this to my sister and to Blake. To Basquiat, Winehouse, Morrison, Cobain, Joplin. To all those legends.”
“You’re insane,” I said, pushing him against the wall.
“Careful. All it takes is one little click, and Lori’s heart goes boom! And little Jack and Joey will be left orphans.”
“You’re actually going to take your own life with your baby boy right there?”
He nodded. “I’ve been committed to this since I was 14 years old. If you do exactly what I say, Lori lives. She can take Jack and Joey and be the hero of the story. Now, I checked your birth certificate. You were born at 21:19, which is when you’ll officially turn 27. Lori’s heart device will become useless at 21:30, at which point she can wriggle out of those ropes and get out of here. But not before we’ve taken a special concoction I’ve made to honor my sister.”
My legs went weak, and I had to sit down on the floor. “You actually want me to end my life with you?”
“Forever 27, Glen. You’ll thank me when we’re living it up.”
“Don’t do it, honey,” said Lori.
“Yeah, that’s not an option,” said Charlie. “You see, if he refuses, I’ll put a bullet in his head. Then I’ll watch as your heart explodes.”
I started to cry. I felt so weak, so powerless. But I think the worst thing of all was that Charlie was my friend. We’d been estranged for years, but he was my friend.
“May I kiss my wife?” I asked.
“Of course, I’m not a monster.”
I stood up and walked over to Lori, gently hugging her. I could feel the metallic device against my chest as I kissed her.
“Don’t do this,” she said, tears streaming.
“I love you, Lori. Look after our boy.”
I went over to the playpen and picked up Jack, who looked so oblivious to everything.
“Dadda,” he said, gently patting my face.
“I love you, Jack,” I said, kissing his cheek. He wiped his cheek like it was the most disgusting thing he’d experienced. “Look after mamma.”
I reached down and stroked little Joseph’s face. “I wish things could have been different for you, little one.”
“Alright, we get it,” said Charlie. “Outside, now.”
Despite the disturbing situation I found myself in, the night was beautiful. A dinner table had been set up on the deck behind the cottage. There was a bottle of whiskey and two glasses. The moon was low, the temperature mild, the sounds of the ocean gentle. It was supposed to be me and Lori, enjoying a meal and maybe a spot of love making on the dunes like we were teenagers again.
“Sit down,” he said. “I’ve waited weeks for this. I almost did it without you, but my scar burned like a motherfucker. Do you ever get that?”
I shrugged as I sat down.
“Yeah, you do. It’s because we’re connected.”
He poured two whiskeys and pushed one towards me. I didn’t hesitate, downing it in one go, shuddering a little at the afterburn.
“That’s good shit,” I said.
“It’s gotta be the best,” he said. “It’s a 10 year old single malt.”
I pushed out my glass for another, which he obliged.
“Suppose I’d better catch up.” He downed it and checked his watch. “21:15. Now’s as good a time as any.”
He pulled out a glass vial from his pocket containing a clear liquid. “This is a highly concentrated mix of Zaleplon, Valium, Klonopin, and ethanol.” He opened it and poured half into my glass, and the other half into his. “The beauty is we’ll probably be asleep before any of the nasty side effects take hold.”
I took a deep breath and downed some whiskey straight from the bottle.
“Gimme that,” he said and did the same. He then pulled out his gun and placed it on the table. I could feel tears streaming down my face.
“You were my brother, Charlie,” I said. “How could you do this to me?”
“Because I love you,” he said. “You and I, forever 27. I can’t think of anything more beautiful than that.”
He looked at his watch again and beamed. “21:19. It’s officially your birthday, Glen. Welcome to 27! Oh, how I’ve waited for this.”
“Please, Charlie. Think of Jack. Think of Joseph. He needs his daddy.”
He picked up the gun. “Drink it.”
I picked up the glass and swirled the clear mixture around. The smell was like pure alcohol. Then I looked to the sky, the moon, the stars, and the ocean.
“To Lori and to Jack,” I said, downing the mixture. It burned like freshly boiled water as it went down, making me clutch my throat. As soon as it reached my stomach, it was like a suckerpunch to the gut. I stumbled off the chair and fell to the ground, clutching my belly.
“I’m coming, brother,” said Charlie, picking up his glass. But before he could take a sip, a gunshot sounded out. I heard the glass smash on the ground and had enough time to see a single trickle of blood drip down his forehead before he collapsed. Then I passed out.
A week later, I was awake in a hospital bed. It turns out my wife is a genius. She figured out that if she could force something between her chest and the adrenaline shot, she’d be able to move freely. So, while Charlie and I were sitting outside, Lori freed her hands (Charlie was no expert when it came to knots, apparently) and wedged a dinner plate against her chest. When the device activated, it shattered the plate, causing a small cut to her chest, but otherwise leaving her unharmed. She then used my gun, which Charlie had left on the table to shoot him in the head.
It wasn’t a fatal shot, though, just enough to render him unconscious. He was being kept on a different floor in the hospital. On the day of my release, I went to see him. He had tubes coming out of his arms, mouth, and thighs. Despite what he’s put me through, it gave me no pleasure to see him that way,
We’ve become temporary guardians to Joseph Morgan, Charlie's son. Though we’re fighting for custody. Charlie’s parents, who are his next of kin, are really too old to be looking after a baby. We always said we wanted two kids, and he’s as sweet as pie. Jack has taken a shine to him, too.
Charlie remained on life support. There was always a police officer sitting outside his room, but I visited regularly. He could sometimes communicate with his hands and eyes. Speech was usually slurred. But I know in my heart he used every fibre of energy left in his body to communicate with me on one special day.
The day before he turned 28.
I was reading “Of Mice and Men” to him. It was a book we’d studied at school and had meant a lot to us at the time, having got us both B grades on our assignments. Mid speech, I was interrupted by his hand on my wrist. He gripped it tighter than I thought he could. I looked into his eyes, my breath frozen. They were wide. Pleading. There were already several birthday cards dotted around the room reminding him of what was about to happen.
“Ple…” his lips parted to try and speak. I could see tears forming in his eyes. I put the book down and leaned closer.
“Charlie, what is it?”
“Glen… you have to…”
I knew what he wanted to say. “Charlie, please don’t ask that of me.”
“Please!” he said. “Forever… 27.”
I looked around the room. It was empty, but the door was open. A cop was sitting outside like usual. I stood up and slowly closed the door, wedging a chair under the handle. I went back to Charlie.
“Are you sure?” I asked.
He lifted a trembling hand to my face and nodded. “I’m sorry, Brother.”
I started to cry as I kissed his cheek. Then I found the mains plug, pulling it out of the wall. I held his hand as he started to convulse, and alarms started sounding through the halls. The cop was knocking on the door, trying to force himself in. By the time the cop and two nurses had got into the room, Charlie was dead.
His parents took me to court. I spent six months in prison before the judge dismissed the case.
Charlie got his wish; he became a member of the 27 club. I hope it’s everything he wanted it to be
submitted by disco-dingus to TheCrypticCompendium [link] [comments]


2024.05.26 18:39 disco-dingus My best friend is obsessed with The 27 Club

It all started the day we found Charlie’s sister in the barn.
Erica had returned to our little town from the city to celebrate her 27th birthday. She was sporting a nose ring and had choppy black hair. She had brought her boyfriend Blake with her, with his long black hair and dark wayfarers. Charlie and I were 14 at the time and thought they looked like rock stars.
Their parents had arranged a party on the grounds of their property. Charlie and I had our first taste of alcohol that night and coughed our guts up when Erica and Blake let us take drags of their cigarettes.
“I love you, Chaz,” said Erica, her arms around Charlie and me. “You too, Glen. Promise me you boys will do whatever makes you happy.”
We had no idea it was her way of saying goodbye.
The next day, there was confusion in the house when Erica and Blake were nowhere to be seen. They’d spent the night in her old bedroom. I’d spent the night on Charlie’s bedroom floor.
“Did you see your sister leave?” asked his mom. We hadn’t. She wasn’t answering her cell either.
Later that day, Charlie and I went to the barn to look for Erica. When we opened the doors, we saw her lying in the arms of Blake on a bed of straw. We put it down to too much vodka.
“We found them,” yelled Charlie. “Wake up, sleepy heads!” As we got closer, we saw an empty bottle of vodka, along with a small empty pot for high-strength sleeping pills, the kind for prescription only.
“Erica,” said Charlie, shaking his sister. She was out cold. “Glen, she’s not breathing!”
Blake started to stir like he was in pain.
“Mr and Mrs Morgan!!” I screamed, running out of the barn.
Erica and Blake were rushed to the hospital. As feared, Erica was dead at the scene. Blake had his stomach pumped and was put in a ward to recover.
“She wanted this,” he managed through god knows what other drugs they had put him on.
“What the fuck do you mean,” said Erica’s dad, grabbing Blake by the front of his smock. He had to be escorted out in tears along with his wife. I sat with Charlie until my parents could come pick me up. We just stared at Blake, this guy who we had thought was so cool, pale with greasy black hair plastered to his face.
“She got in, dudes,” he said.
“”What did she get in?” said Charlie, close to tears. “My sister is dead.”
“But she’s with them now.” He looked up. “Morrison, Joplin, Hendrix…”
“Who are you talking about?” I said.
“Only the greatest to ever live. The 27 Club.” He stepped out of bed, wincing, pulling out the tubes in his arms. I still remember the trickles of blood running down his wrists.
“What the hell is The 27 Club?”
“Strictly members only,” he said. “No admittance to anyone even a day before or after turning 27. I turned two weeks ago, and we were saving it to go together. Forever 27 with the legends.”
He walked to the window. “Say, what floor are we on?”
I shrugged. “Sixth I think.”
He looked out and turned with a grin. “I bet she’s up there partying with Cobain as we speak.” He opened the window,
“Blake,“ said Charlie. “I think you should get back in bed.
“Forever 27 boys,” he said. “See you in a few years.”
He leapt from the window, making Charlie and I cry out in unison. We heard a gruesome thud as he hit something hard. When I braved a peek, he was face down on the roof of an ambulance.
After the events, Charlie became obsessed with “The 27 Club”. When we turned 16, he wanted to form a suicide pact. We would wait until we both turned 27, then end it together.
“These people meant nothing to you,” I said. “When did you ever talk about The Doors, or Jimi Handrix? And everyone has those fucking Nirvana T-Shirts. it means nothing!”
“It’s not just that, Glen,” he said. “It’s honoring my sister. You loved Erica too.”
“I did, but she had problems, Charlie. It’s not even a real club. It’s not a conspiracy. It’s not some amazing club where they’re all living it up in paradise. They're unfortunate coincidences. Plenty of other cool people have died at 26, or 28.”
Before I could react he pulled out a pen knife and sliced open my right palm. I screamed.
“Jesus, what the fuck Charlie!”
He did the same to himself, barely reacted to the pain, then gripped my hand in his.
“Forever 27. We’re bound by blood now, my brother.”
“You’re fucking crazy,” I said, leaving his house. My hand kept slipping on the handle bar of my bike until I got home to patch myself up.
Some years passed, and I’d kept my distance from Charlie. I started college and got a new circle of friends. I remember July 23rd 2011 like it was yesterday. I was 21. Even before Charlie texted me, I knew he would as soon as I heard the news.
Amy Winehouse is dead. She was 27.
The scar on my right palm began to ache. I wasn’t going to contribute to crazy, so I ignored him. I met with my girlfriend Lori and our group of friends for a night out. Of course, Winehouse was the topic of the evening. She had managed to become a cultural phenomenon in such a short amount of time, and her death was genuinely hard hitting. And what better way to celebrate the life of a tortured soul than by keeping the drinks flowing and partaking in the coke our friend Shane had scored.
“Are you guys familiar with the concept of the 27 club?” asked Lori. I swallowed my whisky and cleared my throat.
“Yeah, that’s an exclusive group of celebrities who croaked it at 27, right?” said Shane.
“Exactly,” she said. “Anyone who’s anyone is part of that club.” She held up a glass. “To Amy, and the 27 club!”
“Here here,” said Shane. “May she forever shoot up with my idol, Kurt Cobain, in that big club in the sky.”
“That’s a bit insensitive,” I said. “She literally died hours ago. Have some respect.”
“I’m respecting, buddy,” he said. “This is all for her.”
“Are you OK, Glen,” said Lori. My palm was burning. I ran a finger over the scar and held it up to them.
“I never told you how I got this,” I said. “My childhood best friend, Charlie. His sister killed herself when she was 27. Her boyfriend, too.”
“Shit,” said Shane.
“Charlie did this to me when we were 16. He cut my hand and made us blood brothers. He wanted me to make a suicide pact, that we would end it at 27.”
“Glen, I had no idea,” said Lori.
“I pushed it away,” I said. “I cut all ties with him. But he texted me today, funnily enough, on the day the 27 club gets a new member.”
“I feel awful,” said Shane. “If I’d known, I wouldn't have…”
“Look, it’s fine,” I said. “I’m all for celebrating life or death. I guess I’m just being sensitive. It kind of all came back.”
A few more years passed. Lori and I were married and had a baby boy, Jack. We lived in a house not a million miles away from where I grew up.
One week, I was feeling particularly agitated, and I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. I realized what it was when I spoke to my mom on the phone.
“Will you be seeing Charlie for his birthday?” she asked. “I know you boys don’t see each other as much as you used to, but you were inseparable once upon a time. I hear it’s the big two-seven. He could probably use the support, what with… well, you know.”
“I’ll message him,” I said before saying goodbye. I didn’t want to be a prick, so I kept it polite.
Hey Charlie, I wish you a happy birthday. Maybe we can meet for a drink sometime soon. I’m only like two hours away from our old town. Love, Glen.
About an hour later, I got a notification.
Glen, my brother. Thank you for the birthday wishes. I hear you have a little one of your own now. Me too! Little Joseph. I would love to meet for a drink sometime. You stay in touch. Love, your friend Charlie.
What was most surprising about it was that he didn’t mention his age at all. There was no “I’m 27 now, and you know what that means…” Years of guilt hit me like a sledgehammer to the teeth. I had neglected who was once my most important friend due to an admittedly messed up experience, but clearly one he could have used more support with. I had abandoned him. The scar on my hand burned as if to remind me of the wrong I’d done to him.
A few days later, I reached out again. I suggested we meet at one of our old haunts, but he invited me to his home on account of watching his son. He was still based in our old town and had a nice but modest house.
“Courtesy of the ‘rents,” he said. Charlie’s parents had done rather well for themselves and owned several properties around town. “I’d like you to meet someone.”
There was a basket perched on a wooden frame, and out he pulled a baby wrapped in a blanket. His little eyes were half open.
“This is Joseph. Say hello to your uncle Glen.” He handed Joseph to me, who I awkwardly cradled in my arms until I found the right position.
“He’s the spit of you, Charlie,” I said, looking down at his cute little face. He reached up and grabbed my nose with his sharp baby nails. “Forgot how much that stings,” I said. “Jack is currently enjoying his terrible twos. He’s a bit of a handful for Lori and myself at times.”
“Come sit down,” he said. “How is the old ball and chain?”
I laughed. “She’s actually perfect. I can’t recall a single disagreement we had, other than what to name Jack. She wanted to name him Donald after her grandfather. That wasn’t going to happen.” He laughed. “Where’s your better half, anyway? I don’t think we ever met.”
He looked down. “Suzie. She’s no longer with us. It’s just little Joey and me.”
“Charlie, I’m so sorry.”
“It wasn’t long after his birth. She just didn’t wake up one morning.” He smiled. “We disagreed about his name, too. I wanted to name him Joseph after Joseph Merrick, more commonly known as “The Elephant Man”. He was the first official member of the 27 club.”
I took in a deep breath as I felt unease set in. “Charlie, you can’t still be obsessed with that club.”
He reached over and took Joseph from me. “Did you hear Anton Yelchin is also a member now? Don’t try and tell me it’s not real.”
“Okay, I’m gonna leave you to it,” I said. “Charlie, promise me you’ll look after yourself and Joseph. You know where I am if you need any help.”
“Appreciated,” he said, laying Joseph down in the basket. “Say, isn’t your birthday coming up soon?”
I gulped. “Yeah, in a few weeks. Lori and I are having a weekend in the Hamptons.” I lied.
“Ah, good for you,” he said. “I hope the weather holds out for you.” He held out his hand palm side up, clearly showing me the scar we shared. “Put it there, brother.”
I firmly yet quickly shook his hand and made my way out of his house.
“He’s still not right,” I said to Lori later that evening. “It’s been over 10 years and he’s still obsessed with that fucking club.”
“Try to be more sensitive, Glen. He lost his sister, and now his wife too. As well as raising a baby on his own. The poor guy is probably so lost right now.”
“I’m trying, Lori. But that little reminder of my birthday didn’t sit right with me. It was like ‘remember what that means’. The thing is, it means nothing to me. I didn't agree to a damn thing! I didn’t ask for this scar!”
She kissed the top of my head. “I’m putting Jack to bed, then taking a bath. Why don’t you listen to one of your podcasts? Take your mind off things.”
“Good idea, honey,” I said. “But not before the tickle monster attacks!” I grabbed Jack and blew raspberries on his belly, which sent him into fits of giggles.
“Okay, that’s enough excitement for one day,” said Lori.
“Give me a hug,” I said to Jack. “Goodnight buddy.”
“Night daddy,” he said, then disappeared upstairs with Lori.
I put in my earbuds and started listening to the latest "How Bizarre" podcast. I was content for all of ten minutes when I started thinking about Charlie.
I opened Google and typed in Charlie Morgan, followed by our hometown. One of the first results was from a local newspaper. The headline was something like “[Redacted] man becomes single father after sudden tragedy.” It mentioned his wife Suzie had passed away from breathing complications during sleep. My heart skipped a beat when I read she was 27 at the time of death. I then started to groan as my scar burned as if freshly cut.
I knew in my heart Charlie was responsible for Suzie’s death. I was turning 27 in just over two weeks. I called my mom.
“You sound agitated, sweetheart,” she said. “What’s the matter?”
“Why didn’t you tell me about Charlie’s wife?”
“I did! I mentioned how he’s had a rough go of it in life, but you didn’t seem to be interested. Too occupied with childish rivalries or whatever you call it.”
I felt terrible. “I’m sorry, mother. Did you attend the funeral?”
“I did. Don’t worry, I mentioned how busy you were and you would have been there if you could.”
“Mom, do you think there’s any chance Charlie knows where we live?”
“Would that be a bad thing? You were best friends, after all.”
“Can you just answer me, please?”
“Yes, he knows where you live. Was I not supposed to tell him during his crisis? Should I have read your mind?”
“No, no. I’m sorry, mom. I’m not mad. Look, Lori and I are thinking of going to the Hamptons for my birthday weekend. Would you be able to have Jack?”
“You mean I get to spend the whole weekend with my little Jackie boo?”
That was a 100% yes. When Lori came downstairs after her bath, I grabbed her. She let out a little yelp.
“You haven’t made plans for my birthday, have you?”
“No, not yet. I was thinking of having everyone over for a BBQ, bouncy castle for the kids, bucking bronco for the big kids.”
“How about we get away, just the two of us. Go to the Hamptons and rent a romantic cottage on the beach.”
“How bourgeois,” she chuckled. “Should we rent a garish Lamborghini too?”
I laughed. “If you want? My folks have already said they’ll have Jack for the weekend.”
My birthday came around on a Friday. That morning, Lori drove Jack to my parents’ while I finished packing our weekend bags. Lori has already specifically picked out some fancy dresses to show off to the “douchebags who summer in the Hamptons”. I think she was looking forward to seeing how the other half lived, and making snide remarks behind their backs. I was also in charge of collecting our neon green Lamborghini, which got the whole neighborhood snooping as I pulled it into our driveway.
After an hour or so, Lori hadn’t returned. I just assumed mom and dad were chewing her ears off, so I gave her a call. It went straight to voicemail. so I called my mom instead.
“Is Lori still with you?” I asked. “We kinda need to get on the road.”
“No, sweetheart. We haven’t seen Lori yet.”
My heart dropped. “She left over an hour ago.”
“Oh, my. Maybe she stopped for gas or something.”
“For an hour?”
“Don’t snap at me, Glen. There could be traffic. I’m sure she’s fine.”
“You’re right, I’m sorry. I’ll keep trying her cell. Please let me know when she gets to you.”
My stomach was in knots as I hung up and tried Lori’s cell again. Three hours of calls and texts later, nothing. I kept checking local traffic news to see if there was congestion, or god forbid an accident.
“Mom, I’m so worried,” I said, calling her back. “Do you think I should call the police?”
“Oh sweetheart, I don’t think they’d do anything after a few hours. Stay positive.”
My mind kept going to Charlie. It was my 27th birthday, after all. I dialled his cell.
“Glen,” he answered. “Happy Birthday, my brother,” I could hear the rumblings of an engine in the background.
“Is this a bad time?” I asked. “Are you driving?”
“Oh no, it’s the perfect time. I’m not driving. But hold on, I’ll just put you on to the driver.”
After a few seconds, I heard her.
“Glen, we’re okay. We’re driving to…”
It was Lori, but she was cut off short. “Okay, that’s enough.”
“What the fuck have you done, Charlie,” I spat down the phone. “You bring my family back now!”
“Do you know how kind your wife is?” he said. “She saw me on the side of the road and stopped to give me a ride. Such a sweetie. She told me all about your little birthday getaway and, well, I had to insist on being there myself. I couldn’t miss your 27th after all.”
My stomach was in knots. “Please Charlie. Please bring them back to me.”
“I think you should come here,” he said. “We'll be at the cottage in around 3 hours or so. I heard you have some wheels of your own. Sounds like you’ll be travelling in style.”
“Charlie,” I pleaded. “I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry for your sister. I’m sorry for abandoning you. Please, just come back to me. Let’s talk about it man to man.”
“You’ll either be there, or not. But if not, I’ve got another little friend who would love to make acquaintances with Lori and Jack.” I heard a click.
“He has a gun, Glen,” said Lori.
“I’m coming. Just don’t hurt them, Charlie. Please. I’m coming.”
“Good. Oh, and no police and all that shit of course. You know how it goes. See you later, brother.”
He hung up. I inhaled a sharp breath and screamed into the house. The first thing I did was collect the handgun we kept on the top shelf of our bedroom closet. Then I went downstairs and spotted a handmade birthday card from Jack on the kitchen counter, with a cupcake next to it. You could see Lori’s influence in the words as she had guided his little hand with a paintbrush.
Happy Birthday to the best daddy in the world
I fought back the tears, shoved the delicious cupcake into my mouth, and got into that ugly assed Lamborghini, putting my foot down and raising my middle finger at the neighborhood watch who shook their fists at me.
It took me 4 hours to reach the cottage in the Hamptons we’d rented on Airbnb. I put the gun down the front of my pants and walked inside, my heart ready to explode. I was greeted by the smell of rich tomato sauce. Lori was sitting at a dining chair, her hands strapped to the sides with thick twine. Charlie was standing over the cooker, stirring a saucepan. I could see a playpen with Jack sitting up playing with toys, and baby Joseph was lying on his back, waving his arms around.
“I’m here,” I said, making my presence known. Lori went from looking terrified to mild relief.
“Oh, I heard that god-awful car pull up,” said Charlie. “Half the neighborhood probably did. You’re just in time. I made pasta.”
“Thanks and all, but I’m not hungry.” I went straight over to Lori. “Are you hurt?”
She shook her head. “No, honey. I’m fine. Jack’s fine, too.”
I kissed her and went over to the playpen. Jack giggled when he saw me, holding up a plastic dinosaur. Joseph clung on to a plush toy of a blue dog.
“Don’t they look so cute together?” said Charlie. “Brothers from a different mother, just like us.”
I pulled the gun from my pants and turned to face Charlie. “You’re not the Charlie I called my best friend for years. You need help. This obsession has gone on long enough. Tell me, did you kill your wife?”
“What?” said Lori from the table.
Charlie grinned. “I forget how clever you are. You were always the brains, helping me with homework and stupid math tests that mean absolutely nothing.”
“I loved you, Charlie. But this is too much. So I’m taking my wife, and I’m taking my son. I think under the circumstances we’ll be taking Joseph, too. I sincerely hope you get the help you need so one day he can have a relationship with his dad.”
I walked over to Lori, but she yelled out “Wait!”
Charlie started to laugh. “Did you think it would be that easy? Just look inside her blouse.”
I peeked inside and saw an electronic device strapped to her chest. It had a numerical display that was counting down. There were 46 minutes remaining.
“If she moves from that spot before the timer runs out, a shot of adrenalin will be pumped into her heart. We’re talking about an insane amount of adrenaline. Enough to knock out an elephant. She simply won’t make it.”
“What do you want from me?” I yelled.
He walked towards me and took the gun from my hand, putting it on the table. Then he held up his scarred palm and held it against mine. That burning sensation came back.
“I want us to share a bottle, then live up to our pact.”
“But I didn’t make the pact!” I screamed. “You forced it on me.”
“Come on, Glen. We owe this to my sister and to Blake. To Basquiat, Winehouse, Morrison, Cobain, Joplin. To all those legends.”
“You’re insane,” I said, pushing him against the wall.
“Careful. All it takes is one little click, and Lori’s heart goes boom! And little Jack and Joey will be left orphans.”
“You’re actually going to take your own life with your baby boy right there?”
He nodded. “I’ve been committed to this since I was 14 years old. If you do exactly what I say, Lori lives. She can take Jack and Joey and be the hero of the story. Now, I checked your birth certificate. You were born at 21:19, which is when you’ll officially turn 27. Lori’s heart device will become useless at 21:30, at which point she can wriggle out of those ropes and get out of here. But not before we’ve taken a special concoction I’ve made to honor my sister.”
My legs went weak, and I had to sit down on the floor. “You actually want me to end my life with you?”
“Forever 27, Glen. You’ll thank me when we’re living it up.”
“Don’t do it, honey,” said Lori.
“Yeah, that’s not an option,” said Charlie. “You see, if he refuses, I’ll put a bullet in his head. Then I’ll watch as your heart explodes.”
I started to cry. I felt so weak, so powerless. But I think the worst thing of all was that Charlie was my friend. We’d be estranged for years, but he was my friend.
“May I kiss my wife?” I asked.
“Of course, I’m not a monster.”
I stood up and walked over to Lori, gently hugging her. I could feel the metallic device against my chest as I kissed her.
“Don’t do this,” she said, tears streaming.
“I love you, Lori. Look after our boy.”
I went over to the playpen and picked up Jack, who looked so oblivious to everything.
“Dadda,” he said, gently patting my face.
“I love you, Jack,” I said, kissing his cheek. He wiped his cheek like it was the most disgusting thing he’d experienced. “Look after mamma.”
I reached down and stroked little Joseph’s face. “I wish things could have been different for you, little one.”
“Alright, we get it,” said Charlie. “Outside, now.”
Despite the disturbing situation I found myself in, the night was beautiful. A dinner table had been set up on the deck behind the cottage. There was a bottle of whiskey and two glasses. The moon was low, the temperature mild, the sounds of the ocean gentle. It was supposed to be me and Lori, enjoying a meal and maybe a spot of love making on the dunes like we were teenagers again.
“Sit down,” he said. “I’ve waited weeks for this. I almost did it without you, but my scar burned like a motherfucker. Do you ever get that?”
I shrugged as I sat down.
“Yeah, you do. It’s because we’re connected.”
He poured two whiskeys and pushed one towards me. I didn’t hesitate, downing it in one go, shuddering a little at the afterburn.
“That’s good shit,” I said.
“It’s gotta be the best,” he said. “It’s a 10 year old single malt.”
I pushed out my glass for another, which he obliged.
“Suppose I’d better catch up.” He downed it and checked his watch. “21:15. Now’s as good a time as any.”
He pulled out a glass vial from his pocket containing a clear liquid. “This is a highly concentrated mix of Zaleplon, Valium, Klonopin, and ethanol.” He opened it and poured half into my glass, and the other half into his. “The beauty is we’ll probably be asleep before any of the nasty side effects take hold.”
I took a deep breath and downed some whiskey straight from the bottle.
“Gimme that,” he said and did the same. He then pulled out his gun and placed it on the table. I could feel tears streaming down my face.
“You were my brother, Charlie,” I said. “How could you do this to me?”
“Because I love you,” he said. “You and I, forever 27. I can’t think of anything more beautiful than that.”
He looked at his watch again and beamed. “21:19. It’s officially your birthday, Glen. Welcome to 27! Oh, how I’ve waited for this.”
“Please, Charlie. Think of Jack. Think of Joseph. He needs his daddy.”
He picked up the gun. “Drink it.”
I picked up the glass and swirled the clear mixture around. The smell was like pure alcohol. Then I looked to the sky, the moon, the stars, and the ocean.
“To Lori and to Jack,” I said, downing the mixture. It burned like freshly boiled water as it went down, making me clutch my throat. As soon as it reached my stomach, it was like a suckerpunch to the gut. I stumbled off the chair and fell to the ground, clutching my belly.
“I’m coming, brother,” said Charlie, picking up his glass. But before he could take a sip, a gunshot sounded out. I heard the glass smash on the ground and had enough time to see a single trickle of blood drip down his forehead before he collapsed. Then I passed out.
A week later, I was awake in a hospital bed. It turns out my wife is a genius. She figured out that if she could force something between her chest and the adrenaline shot, she’d be able to move freely. So, while Charlie and I were sitting outside, Lori freed her hands (Charlie was no expert when it came to knots, apparently) and wedged a dinner plate against her chest. When the device activated, it shattered the plate, causing a small cut to her chest, but otherwise leaving her unharmed. She then used my gun, which Charlie had left on the table to shoot him in the head.
It wasn’t a fatal shot, though, just enough to render him unconscious. He was being kept on a different floor in the hospital. On the day of my release, I went to see him. He had tubes coming out of his arms, mouth, and thighs. Despite what he’s put me through, it gave me no pleasure to see him that way,
We’ve become temporary guardians to Joseph Morgan, Charlie's son. Though we’re fighting for custody. Charlie’s parents, who are his next of kin, are really too old to be looking after a baby. We always said we wanted two kids, and he’s as sweet as pie. Jack has taken a shine to him, too.
Charlie remained on life support. There was always a police officer sitting outside his room, but I visited regularly. He could sometimes communicate with his hands and eyes. Speech was usually slurred. But I know in my heart he used every fibre of energy left in his body to communicate with me on one special day.
The day before he turned 28.
I was reading “Of Mice and Men” to him. It was a book we’d studied at school and had meant a lot to us at the time, having got us both B grades on our assignments. Mid speech, I was interrupted by his hand on my wrist. He gripped it tighter than I thought he could. I looked into his eyes, my breath frozen. They were wide. Pleading. There were already several birthday cards dotted around the room reminding him of what was about to happen.
“Ple…” his lips parted to try and speak. I could see tears forming in his eyes. I put the book down and leaned closer.
“Charlie, what is it?”
“Glen… you have to…”
I knew what he wanted to say. “Charlie, please don’t ask that of me.”
“Please!” he said. “Forever… 27.”
I looked around the room. It was empty, but the door was open. A cop was sitting outside like usual. I stood up and slowly closed the door, wedging a chair under the handle. I went back to Charlie.
“Are you sure?” I asked.
He lifted a trembling hand to my face and nodded. “I’m sorry, Brother.”
I started to cry as I kissed his cheek. Then I found the mains plug, pulling it out of the wall. I held his hand as he started to convulse, and alarms started sounding through the halls. The cop was knocking on the door, trying to force himself in. By the time the cop and two nurses had got into the room, Charlie was dead.
His parents took me to court. I spent six months in prison before the judge dismissed the case.
Charlie got his wish; he became a member of the 27 club. I hope it’s everything he wanted it to be.
submitted by disco-dingus to DiscoBloodbath [link] [comments]


2024.05.26 18:37 disco-dingus My best friend is obsessed with The 27 Club

It all started the day we found Charlie’s sister in the barn.
Erica had returned to our little town from the city to celebrate her 27th birthday. She was sporting a nose ring and had choppy black hair. She had brought her boyfriend Blake with her, with his long black hair and dark wayfarers. Charlie and I were 14 at the time and thought they looked like rock stars.
Their parents had arranged a party on the grounds of their property. Charlie and I had our first taste of alcohol that night and coughed our guts up when Erica and Blake let us take drags of their cigarettes.
“I love you, Chaz,” said Erica, her arms around Charlie and me. “You too, Glen. Promise me you boys will do whatever makes you happy.”
We had no idea it was her way of saying goodbye.
The next day, there was confusion in the house when Erica and Blake were nowhere to be seen. They’d spent the night in her old bedroom. I’d spent the night on Charlie’s bedroom floor.
“Did you see your sister leave?” asked his mom. We hadn’t. She wasn’t answering her cell either.
Later that day, Charlie and I went to the barn to look for Erica. When we opened the doors, we saw her lying in the arms of Blake on a bed of straw. We put it down to too much vodka.
“We found them,” yelled Charlie. “Wake up, sleepy heads!” As we got closer, we saw an empty bottle of vodka, along with a small empty pot for high-strength sleeping pills, the kind for prescription only.
“Erica,” said Charlie, shaking his sister. She was out cold. “Glen, she’s not breathing!”
Blake started to stir like he was in pain.
“Mr and Mrs Morgan!!” I screamed, running out of the barn.
Erica and Blake were rushed to the hospital. As feared, Erica was dead at the scene. Blake had his stomach pumped and was put in a ward to recover.
“She wanted this,” he managed through god knows what other drugs they had put him on.
“What the fuck do you mean,” said Erica’s dad, grabbing Blake by the front of his smock. He had to be escorted out in tears along with his wife. I sat with Charlie until my parents could come pick me up. We just stared at Blake, this guy who we had thought was so cool, pale with greasy black hair plastered to his face.
“She got in, dudes,” he said.
“”What did she get in?” said Charlie, close to tears. “My sister is dead.”
“But she’s with them now.” He looked up. “Morrison, Joplin, Hendrix…”
“Who are you talking about?” I said.
“Only the greatest to ever live. The 27 Club.” He stepped out of bed, wincing, pulling out the tubes in his arms. I still remember the trickles of blood running down his wrists.
“What the hell is The 27 Club?”
“Strictly members only,” he said. “No admittance to anyone even a day before or after turning 27. I turned two weeks ago, and we were saving it to go together. Forever 27 with the legends.”
He walked to the window. “Say, what floor are we on?”
I shrugged. “Sixth I think.”
He looked out and turned with a grin. “I bet she’s up there partying with Cobain as we speak.” He opened the window,
“Blake,“ said Charlie. “I think you should get back in bed.
“Forever 27 boys,” he said. “See you in a few years.”
He leapt from the window, making Charlie and I cry out in unison. We heard a gruesome thud as he hit something hard. When I braved a peek, he was face down on the roof of an ambulance.
After the events, Charlie became obsessed with “The 27 Club”. When we turned 16, he wanted to form a suicide pact. We would wait until we both turned 27, then end it together.
“These people meant nothing to you,” I said. “When did you ever talk about The Doors, or Jimi Handrix? And everyone has those fucking Nirvana T-Shirts. it means nothing!”
“It’s not just that, Glen,” he said. “It’s honoring my sister. You loved Erica too.”
“I did, but she had problems, Charlie. It’s not even a real club. It’s not a conspiracy. It’s not some amazing club where they’re all living it up in paradise. They're unfortunate coincidences. Plenty of other cool people have died at 26, or 28.”
Before I could react he pulled out a pen knife and sliced open my right palm. I screamed.
“Jesus, what the fuck Charlie!”
He did the same to himself, barely reacted to the pain, then gripped my hand in his.
“Forever 27. We’re bound by blood now, my brother.”
“You’re fucking crazy,” I said, leaving his house. My hand kept slipping on the handle bar of my bike until I got home to patch myself up.
Some years passed, and I’d kept my distance from Charlie. I started college and got a new circle of friends. I remember July 23rd 2011 like it was yesterday. I was 21. Even before Charlie texted me, I knew he would as soon as I heard the news.
Amy Winehouse is dead. She was 27.
The scar on my right palm began to ache. I wasn’t going to contribute to crazy, so I ignored him. I met with my girlfriend Lori and our group of friends for a night out. Of course, Winehouse was the topic of the evening. She had managed to become a cultural phenomenon in such a short amount of time, and her death was genuinely hard hitting. And what better way to celebrate the life of a tortured soul than by keeping the drinks flowing and partaking in the coke our friend Shane had scored.
“Are you guys familiar with the concept of the 27 club?” asked Lori. I swallowed my whisky and cleared my throat.
“Yeah, that’s an exclusive group of celebrities who croaked it at 27, right?” said Shane.
“Exactly,” she said. “Anyone who’s anyone is part of that club.” She held up a glass. “To Amy, and the 27 club!”
“Here here,” said Shane. “May she forever shoot up with my idol, Kurt Cobain, in that big club in the sky.”
“That’s a bit insensitive,” I said. “She literally died hours ago. Have some respect.”
“I’m respecting, buddy,” he said. “This is all for her.”
“Are you OK, Glen,” said Lori. My palm was burning. I ran a finger over the scar and held it up to them.
“I never told you how I got this,” I said. “My childhood best friend, Charlie. His sister killed herself when she was 27. Her boyfriend, too.”
“Shit,” said Shane.
“Charlie did this to me when we were 16. He cut my hand and made us blood brothers. He wanted me to make a suicide pact, that we would end it at 27.”
“Glen, I had no idea,” said Lori.
“I pushed it away,” I said. “I cut all ties with him. But he texted me today, funnily enough, on the day the 27 club gets a new member.”
“I feel awful,” said Shane. “If I’d known, I wouldn't have…”
“Look, it’s fine,” I said. “I’m all for celebrating life or death. I guess I’m just being sensitive. It kind of all came back.”
A few more years passed. Lori and I were married and had a baby boy, Jack. We lived in a house not a million miles away from where I grew up.
One week, I was feeling particularly agitated, and I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. I realized what it was when I spoke to my mom on the phone.
“Will you be seeing Charlie for his birthday?” she asked. “I know you boys don’t see each other as much as you used to, but you were inseparable once upon a time. I hear it’s the big two-seven. He could probably use the support, what with… well, you know.”
“I’ll message him,” I said before saying goodbye. I didn’t want to be a prick, so I kept it polite.
Hey Charlie, I wish you a happy birthday. Maybe we can meet for a drink sometime soon. I’m only like two hours away from our old town. Love, Glen.
About an hour later, I got a notification.
Glen, my brother. Thank you for the birthday wishes. I hear you have a little one of your own now. Me too! Little Joseph. I would love to meet for a drink sometime. You stay in touch. Love, your friend Charlie.
What was most surprising about it was that he didn’t mention his age at all. There was no “I’m 27 now, and you know what that means…” Years of guilt hit me like a sledgehammer to the teeth. I had neglected who was once my most important friend due to an admittedly messed up experience, but clearly one he could have used more support with. I had abandoned him. The scar on my hand burned as if to remind me of the wrong I’d done to him.
A few days later, I reached out again. I suggested we meet at one of our old haunts, but he invited me to his home on account of watching his son. He was still based in our old town and had a nice but modest house.
“Courtesy of the ‘rents,” he said. Charlie’s parents had done rather well for themselves and owned several properties around town. “I’d like you to meet someone.”
There was a basket perched on a wooden frame, and out he pulled a baby wrapped in a blanket. His little eyes were half open.
“This is Joseph. Say hello to your uncle Glen.” He handed Joseph to me, who I awkwardly cradled in my arms until I found the right position.
“He’s the spit of you, Charlie,” I said, looking down at his cute little face. He reached up and grabbed my nose with his sharp baby nails. “Forgot how much that stings,” I said. “Jack is currently enjoying his terrible twos. He’s a bit of a handful for Lori and myself at times.”
“Come sit down,” he said. “How is the old ball and chain?”
I laughed. “She’s actually perfect. I can’t recall a single disagreement we had, other than what to name Jack. She wanted to name him Donald after her grandfather. That wasn’t going to happen.” He laughed. “Where’s your better half, anyway? I don’t think we ever met.”
He looked down. “Suzie. She’s no longer with us. It’s just little Joey and me.”
“Charlie, I’m so sorry.”
“It wasn’t long after his birth. She just didn’t wake up one morning.” He smiled. “We disagreed about his name, too. I wanted to name him Joseph after Joseph Merrick, more commonly known as “The Elephant Man”. He was the first official member of the 27 club.”
I took in a deep breath as I felt unease set in. “Charlie, you can’t still be obsessed with that club.”
He reached over and took Joseph from me. “Did you hear Anton Yelchin is also a member now? Don’t try and tell me it’s not real.”
“Okay, I’m gonna leave you to it,” I said. “Charlie, promise me you’ll look after yourself and Joseph. You know where I am if you need any help.”
“Appreciated,” he said, laying Joseph down in the basket. “Say, isn’t your birthday coming up soon?”
I gulped. “Yeah, in a few weeks. Lori and I are having a weekend in the Hamptons.” I lied.
“Ah, good for you,” he said. “I hope the weather holds out for you.” He held out his hand palm side up, clearly showing me the scar we shared. “Put it there, brother.”
I firmly yet quickly shook his hand and made my way out of his house.
“He’s still not right,” I said to Lori later that evening. “It’s been over 10 years and he’s still obsessed with that fucking club.”
“Try to be more sensitive, Glen. He lost his sister, and now his wife too. As well as raising a baby on his own. The poor guy is probably so lost right now.”
“I’m trying, Lori. But that little reminder of my birthday didn’t sit right with me. It was like ‘remember what that means’. The thing is, it means nothing to me. I didn't agree to a damn thing! I didn’t ask for this scar!”
She kissed the top of my head. “I’m putting Jack to bed, then taking a bath. Why don’t you listen to one of your podcasts? Take your mind off things.”
“Good idea, honey,” I said. “But not before the tickle monster attacks!” I grabbed Jack and blew raspberries on his belly, which sent him into fits of giggles.
“Okay, that’s enough excitement for one day,” said Lori.
“Give me a hug,” I said to Jack. “Goodnight buddy.”
“Night daddy,” he said, then disappeared upstairs with Lori.
I put in my earbuds and started listening to the latest "How Bizarre" podcast. I was content for all of ten minutes when I started thinking about Charlie.
I opened Google and typed in Charlie Morgan, followed by our hometown. One of the first results was from a local newspaper. The headline was something like “[Redacted] man becomes single father after sudden tragedy.” It mentioned his wife Suzie had passed away from breathing complications during sleep. My heart skipped a beat when I read she was 27 at the time of death. I then started to groan as my scar burned as if freshly cut.
I knew in my heart Charlie was responsible for Suzie’s death. I was turning 27 in just over two weeks. I called my mom.
“You sound agitated, sweetheart,” she said. “What’s the matter?”
“Why didn’t you tell me about Charlie’s wife?”
“I did! I mentioned how he’s had a rough go of it in life, but you didn’t seem to be interested. Too occupied with childish rivalries or whatever you call it.”
I felt terrible. “I’m sorry, mother. Did you attend the funeral?”
“I did. Don’t worry, I mentioned how busy you were and you would have been there if you could.”
“Mom, do you think there’s any chance Charlie knows where we live?”
“Would that be a bad thing? You were best friends, after all.”
“Can you just answer me, please?”
“Yes, he knows where you live. Was I not supposed to tell him during his crisis? Should I have read your mind?”
“No, no. I’m sorry, mom. I’m not mad. Look, Lori and I are thinking of going to the Hamptons for my birthday weekend. Would you be able to have Jack?”
“You mean I get to spend the whole weekend with my little Jackie boo?”
That was a 100% yes. When Lori came downstairs after her bath, I grabbed her. She let out a little yelp.
“You haven’t made plans for my birthday, have you?”
“No, not yet. I was thinking of having everyone over for a BBQ, bouncy castle for the kids, bucking bronco for the big kids.”
“How about we get away, just the two of us. Go to the Hamptons and rent a romantic cottage on the beach.”
“How bourgeois,” she chuckled. “Should we rent a garish Lamborghini too?”
I laughed. “If you want? My folks have already said they’ll have Jack for the weekend.”
My birthday came around on a Friday. That morning, Lori drove Jack to my parents’ while I finished packing our weekend bags. Lori has already specifically picked out some fancy dresses to show off to the “douchebags who summer in the Hamptons”. I think she was looking forward to seeing how the other half lived, and making snide remarks behind their backs. I was also in charge of collecting our neon green Lamborghini, which got the whole neighborhood snooping as I pulled it into our driveway.
After an hour or so, Lori hadn’t returned. I just assumed mom and dad were chewing her ears off, so I gave her a call. It went straight to voicemail. so I called my mom instead.
“Is Lori still with you?” I asked. “We kinda need to get on the road.”
“No, sweetheart. We haven’t seen Lori yet.”
My heart dropped. “She left over an hour ago.”
“Oh, my. Maybe she stopped for gas or something.”
“For an hour?”
“Don’t snap at me, Glen. There could be traffic. I’m sure she’s fine.”
“You’re right, I’m sorry. I’ll keep trying her cell. Please let me know when she gets to you.”
My stomach was in knots as I hung up and tried Lori’s cell again. Three hours of calls and texts later, nothing. I kept checking local traffic news to see if there was congestion, or god forbid an accident.
“Mom, I’m so worried,” I said, calling her back. “Do you think I should call the police?”
“Oh sweetheart, I don’t think they’d do anything after a few hours. Stay positive.”
My mind kept going to Charlie. It was my 27th birthday, after all. I dialled his cell.
“Glen,” he answered. “Happy Birthday, my brother,” I could hear the rumblings of an engine in the background.
“Is this a bad time?” I asked. “Are you driving?”
“Oh no, it’s the perfect time. I’m not driving. But hold on, I’ll just put you on to the driver.”
After a few seconds, I heard her.
“Glen, we’re okay. We’re driving to…”
It was Lori, but she was cut off short. “Okay, that’s enough.”
“What the fuck have you done, Charlie,” I spat down the phone. “You bring my family back now!”
“Do you know how kind your wife is?” he said. “She saw me on the side of the road and stopped to give me a ride. Such a sweetie. She told me all about your little birthday getaway and, well, I had to insist on being there myself. I couldn’t miss your 27th after all.”
My stomach was in knots. “Please Charlie. Please bring them back to me.”
“I think you should come here,” he said. “We'll be at the cottage in around 3 hours or so. I heard you have some wheels of your own. Sounds like you’ll be travelling in style.”
“Charlie,” I pleaded. “I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry for your sister. I’m sorry for abandoning you. Please, just come back to me. Let’s talk about it man to man.”
“You’ll either be there, or not. But if not, I’ve got another little friend who would love to make acquaintances with Lori and Jack.” I heard a click.
“He has a gun, Glen,” said Lori.
“I’m coming. Just don’t hurt them, Charlie. Please. I’m coming.”
“Good. Oh, and no police and all that shit of course. You know how it goes. See you later, brother.”
He hung up. I inhaled a sharp breath and screamed into the house. The first thing I did was collect the handgun we kept on the top shelf of our bedroom closet. Then I went downstairs and spotted a handmade birthday card from Jack on the kitchen counter, with a cupcake next to it. You could see Lori’s influence in the words as she had guided his little hand with a paintbrush.
Happy Birthday to the best daddy in the world
I fought back the tears, shoved the delicious cupcake into my mouth, and got into that ugly assed Lamborghini, putting my foot down and raising my middle finger at the neighborhood watch who shook their fists at me.
It took me 4 hours to reach the cottage in the Hamptons we’d rented on Airbnb. I put the gun down the front of my pants and walked inside, my heart ready to explode. I was greeted by the smell of rich tomato sauce. Lori was sitting at a dining chair, her hands strapped to the sides with thick twine. Charlie was standing over the cooker, stirring a saucepan. I could see a playpen with Jack sitting up playing with toys, and baby Joseph was lying on his back, waving his arms around.
“I’m here,” I said, making my presence known. Lori went from looking terrified to mild relief.
“Oh, I heard that god-awful car pull up,” said Charlie. “Half the neighborhood probably did. You’re just in time. I made pasta.”
“Thanks and all, but I’m not hungry.” I went straight over to Lori. “Are you hurt?”
She shook her head. “No, honey. I’m fine. Jack’s fine, too.”
I kissed her and went over to the playpen. Jack giggled when he saw me, holding up a plastic dinosaur. Joseph clung on to a plush toy of a blue dog.
“Don’t they look so cute together?” said Charlie. “Brothers from a different mother, just like us.”
I pulled the gun from my pants and turned to face Charlie. “You’re not the Charlie I called my best friend for years. You need help. This obsession has gone on long enough. Tell me, did you kill your wife?”
“What?” said Lori from the table.
Charlie grinned. “I forget how clever you are. You were always the brains, helping me with homework and stupid math tests that mean absolutely nothing.”
“I loved you, Charlie. But this is too much. So I’m taking my wife, and I’m taking my son. I think under the circumstances we’ll be taking Joseph, too. I sincerely hope you get the help you need so one day he can have a relationship with his dad.”
I walked over to Lori, but she yelled out “Wait!”
Charlie started to laugh. “Did you think it would be that easy? Just look inside her blouse.”
I peeked inside and saw an electronic device strapped to her chest. It had a numerical display that was counting down. There were 46 minutes remaining.
“If she moves from that spot before the timer runs out, a shot of adrenalin will be pumped into her heart. We’re talking about an insane amount of adrenaline. Enough to knock out an elephant. She simply won’t make it.”
“What do you want from me?” I yelled.
He walked towards me and took the gun from my hand, putting it on the table. Then he held up his scarred palm and held it against mine. That burning sensation came back.
“I want us to share a bottle, then live up to our pact.”
“But I didn’t make the pact!” I screamed. “You forced it on me.”
“Come on, Glen. We owe this to my sister and to Blake. To Basquiat, Winehouse, Morrison, Cobain, Joplin. To all those legends.”
“You’re insane,” I said, pushing him against the wall.
“Careful. All it takes is one little click, and Lori’s heart goes boom! And little Jack and Joey will be left orphans.”
“You’re actually going to take your own life with your baby boy right there?”
He nodded. “I’ve been committed to this since I was 14 years old. If you do exactly what I say, Lori lives. She can take Jack and Joey and be the hero of the story. Now, I checked your birth certificate. You were born at 21:19, which is when you’ll officially turn 27. Lori’s heart device will become useless at 21:30, at which point she can wriggle out of those ropes and get out of here. But not before we’ve taken a special concoction I’ve made to honor my sister.”
My legs went weak, and I had to sit down on the floor. “You actually want me to end my life with you?”
“Forever 27, Glen. You’ll thank me when we’re living it up.”
“Don’t do it, honey,” said Lori.
“Yeah, that’s not an option,” said Charlie. “You see, if he refuses, I’ll put a bullet in his head. Then I’ll watch as your heart explodes.”
I started to cry. I felt so weak, so powerless. But I think the worst thing of all was that Charlie was my friend. We’d been estranged for years, but he was my friend.
“May I kiss my wife?” I asked.
“Of course, I’m not a monster.”
I stood up and walked over to Lori, gently hugging her. I could feel the metallic device against my chest as I kissed her.
“Don’t do this,” she said, tears streaming.
“I love you, Lori. Look after our boy.”
I went over to the playpen and picked up Jack, who looked so oblivious to everything.
“Dadda,” he said, gently patting my face.
“I love you, Jack,” I said, kissing his cheek. He wiped his cheek like it was the most disgusting thing he’d experienced. “Look after mamma.”
I reached down and stroked little Joseph’s face. “I wish things could have been different for you, little one.”
“Alright, we get it,” said Charlie. “Outside, now.”
Despite the disturbing situation I found myself in, the night was beautiful. A dinner table had been set up on the deck behind the cottage. There was a bottle of whiskey and two glasses. The moon was low, the temperature mild, the sounds of the ocean gentle. It was supposed to be me and Lori, enjoying a meal and maybe a spot of love making on the dunes like we were teenagers again.
“Sit down,” he said. “I’ve waited weeks for this. I almost did it without you, but my scar burned like a motherfucker. Do you ever get that?”
I shrugged as I sat down.
“Yeah, you do. It’s because we’re connected.”
He poured two whiskeys and pushed one towards me. I didn’t hesitate, downing it in one go, shuddering a little at the afterburn.
“That’s good shit,” I said.
“It’s gotta be the best,” he said. “It’s a 10 year old single malt.”
I pushed out my glass for another, which he obliged.
“Suppose I’d better catch up.” He downed it and checked his watch. “21:15. Now’s as good a time as any.”
He pulled out a glass vial from his pocket containing a clear liquid. “This is a highly concentrated mix of Zaleplon, Valium, Klonopin, and ethanol.” He opened it and poured half into my glass, and the other half into his. “The beauty is we’ll probably be asleep before any of the nasty side effects take hold.”
I took a deep breath and downed some whiskey straight from the bottle.
“Gimme that,” he said and did the same. He then pulled out his gun and placed it on the table. I could feel tears streaming down my face.
“You were my brother, Charlie,” I said. “How could you do this to me?”
“Because I love you,” he said. “You and I, forever 27. I can’t think of anything more beautiful than that.”
He looked at his watch again and beamed. “21:19. It’s officially your birthday, Glen. Welcome to 27! Oh, how I’ve waited for this.”
“Please, Charlie. Think of Jack. Think of Joseph. He needs his daddy.”
He picked up the gun. “Drink it.”
I picked up the glass and swirled the clear mixture around. The smell was like pure alcohol. Then I looked to the sky, the moon, the stars, and the ocean.
“To Lori and to Jack,” I said, downing the mixture. It burned like freshly boiled water as it went down, making me clutch my throat. As soon as it reached my stomach, it was like a suckerpunch to the gut. I stumbled off the chair and fell to the ground, clutching my belly.
“I’m coming, brother,” said Charlie, picking up his glass. But before he could take a sip, a gunshot sounded out. I heard the glass smash on the ground and had enough time to see a single trickle of blood drip down his forehead before he collapsed. Then I passed out.
A week later, I was awake in a hospital bed. It turns out my wife is a genius. She figured out that if she could force something between her chest and the adrenaline shot, she’d be able to move freely. So, while Charlie and I were sitting outside, Lori freed her hands (Charlie was no expert when it came to knots, apparently) and wedged a dinner plate against her chest. When the device activated, it shattered the plate, causing a small cut to her chest, but otherwise leaving her unharmed. She then used my gun, which Charlie had left on the table to shoot him in the head.
It wasn’t a fatal shot, though, just enough to render him unconscious. He was being kept on a different floor in the hospital. On the day of my release, I went to see him. He had tubes coming out of his arms, mouth, and thighs. Despite what he’s put me through, it gave me no pleasure to see him that way,
We’ve become temporary guardians to Joseph Morgan, Charlie's son. Though we’re fighting for custody. Charlie’s parents, who are his next of kin, are really too old to be looking after a baby. We always said we wanted two kids, and he’s as sweet as pie. Jack has taken a shine to him, too.
Charlie remained on life support. There was always a police officer sitting outside his room, but I visited regularly. He could sometimes communicate with his hands and eyes. Speech was usually slurred. But I know in my heart he used every fibre of energy left in his body to communicate with me on one special day.
The day before he turned 28.
I was reading “Of Mice and Men” to him. It was a book we’d studied at school and had meant a lot to us at the time, having got us both B grades on our assignments. Mid speech, I was interrupted by his hand on my wrist. He gripped it tighter than I thought he could. I looked into his eyes, my breath frozen. They were wide. Pleading. There were already several birthday cards dotted around the room reminding him of what was about to happen.
“Ple…” his lips parted to try and speak. I could see tears forming in his eyes. I put the book down and leaned closer.
“Charlie, what is it?”
“Glen… you have to…”
I knew what he wanted to say. “Charlie, please don’t ask that of me.”
“Please!” he said. “Forever… 27.”
I looked around the room. It was empty, but the door was open. A cop was sitting outside like usual. I stood up and slowly closed the door, wedging a chair under the handle. I went back to Charlie.
“Are you sure?” I asked.
He lifted a trembling hand to my face and nodded. “I’m sorry, Brother.”
I started to cry as I kissed his cheek. Then I found the mains plug, pulling it out of the wall. I held his hand as he started to convulse, and alarms started sounding through the halls. The cop was knocking on the door, trying to force himself in. By the time the cop and two nurses had got into the room, Charlie was dead.
His parents took me to court. I spent six months in prison before the judge dismissed the case.
Charlie got his wish; he became a member of the 27 club. I hope it’s everything he wanted it to be
Edit: For those who don't understand why I did what I did, Charlie was my best friend for a lot of years. One final act of kindness felt right to me, regardless of what he'd done to me. I wouldn't even want to see my worst enemy kept alive with wires and synthetic breathing apparatus.
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2024.05.26 13:26 Realistic_Collar_726 Worst break up of all time ?41F 43 M

The headline may sound dramatic but I am struggling big time to understand what has happened in my life over the last ten days and how to move forward.
I have lots of support around me in the way of friends and now lawyers but I wonder is everyone just telling me what I want to hear so hence the post.
I will take any and all advice you can offer in advance I appreciate every one that takes the time to offer that or their experience.
Back story( messy) I got into a relationship 4 years ago with a man I fell head over heels in love with. It was by all accounts the most amazing passionate authentic love story. We fought like hell for our relationship and to hold on to our love with each other. We idolized each other. Couldn’t keep away from each other.
He was American and I was European. He was married when I met him ( coming out of it the marriage had broken down) and I was single. We both had children.
He was slightly broken and defeated in life when I met him, and I wasn’t. I was confident productive and in the least egotistical way I was successful both professionally and as a person I had complete peace.
Aside from falling in love with him.. I truly wanted to be a part of fixing him and his problems. That’s what love is after all?
I spent the 1st year in a semi long distance relationship and I did everything I could to help him and he loved me so intensely the love felt unbeatable.
During this time I was suspicious slightly of some minor or possibly major white lies he told about his ex and invariably the pressure on our relationship mounted we broke up and he moved back in with his ex and kids within a few weeks.
I was devastated truly heart broken all the plans of the future lost forever….
Then 3 weeks later he came back, said he had a mistake that they were still living together but the relationship was now firmly over.. and I believed him. I was still in love with him .. And took him back with open arms.
We started to talk about our plans again and within a month of that I noticed some more white lies, called his ex and found out no there were in therapy and she believed they were trying to fix it.
His life blew up and in that moment he revealed he was a scared spoilt little boy who was afraid of the financial and emotional trauma that his ex was inflicting and imparting on him over the guilt of leaving his family and he was lying to us both because he didn’t know what else to do. But that he loved me and only me and he was truly sorry, he entered rehab and emerged a week or two later and reached out again with determination that this time he has straightened himself out.
I know what you are thinking … Don’t tell me you believed him again. Yes I did, I loved him and I was for the 1st time in my life truly weak for something or someone.
We got back together and this time it was full throttle … got engaged and I moved to the USA where we started to blend our families.
Accept he wasn’t divorced his ex was now avenging him and she wasn’t going to make my life or his life easy and in fact she made it hell.
In the middle of this his ex moved states to deliberately try and unsettle us break us up and we moved also.
We needed a house and his funds were locked down .. due to his divorce. We found a house and had 7 days to close and buy it. I didn’t have the cash available but he put a huge amount of pressure on me to do this for our family and I put together a hasty deal to finance and close the house in 7 days.
We get married a month or so later.
Fast forward a year and he is paying a huge amount of alimony every month to his wife and his income has dropped but he keeps paying it all of his income and rest from savings … and I start questioning how it is sustainable and why he won’t change it and I challenge it , the rows start and they get thicker and faster. He is also paying for increased costs in our new life together with me.
I had also come under huge financial pressure as I have depleted my savings to service him and the relationship in the early days relocating and living in an expensive area that we moved to and my brain power has eroded so I am not driving my own business.
The house finance deal starts to fall part and I start being sued … and threats for foreclose so I hire a lawyer tell my husband and I start to fix it slowly but I start to fix it.
But now there is is a new problem for him to emotionally beat and guilt me about and he becomes even more manic. I go back to part function and beg him to give me the space to figure this out.
His mental health hits the floor during that time and I find myself daily disabled mentally exhausted and tending to his every need and breakdowns.
I am a shadow of myself and at this point in a severely emotionally abusive relationship ( that I blame myself for because I am not doing enough for his mental health) and I become a reactionary emotional abuser lashing out verbally at his comments to me challenging his control of me and just generally turned into a monster to survive. It is truly toxic but in the good moments he is telling me he is so sorry and he loves me more than anything in his life.
Life becomes very messy but we still hold on to the love and he tells me he loves me asks me if I am going leave him every day of course I wasn’t going to.
Until last week … his family came in while I was out of town ( I was back in my home country sorting out a visa issue for a few weeks enjoying the break from the fighting and using the space to rebuild a friendship and marriage with him ) and my two older children were with him in America attending school.
Our coms are a mixture of arguments and him love bombing me.
All of a sudden the texts stop and calls stop in one day. He goes missing off an entire day and comes home to tell my sons they have to leave the next day that we don’t own the house( which is a lie).
He goes nuclear … Blocks all chance of me being able to contact him and his family …to find out what has happened. Emptied the house of its contents kicks my older children out ( with no parent in the country other than him )and drops our family dog to the pound then he rescinded my visa all in one day. Nuclear…
That was ten days ago I returned my kids to Europe on an emergency flight and have been trying to piece this together they loved him and we are traumatized and I am truly devastated…
No contact whatsoever and all his family had cut off coms with me I have no idea what he has told them but everything that was going on good and bad he knew about
Did he ever love me ? Was it all about financial status for him? Did he just use me ? Am I a bad person ? What is happening ?
Please be honest this is an awful time in my life.
submitted by Realistic_Collar_726 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.26 13:25 Realistic_Collar_726 Is this the worst break up of all time does it get better

The headline may sound dramatic but I am struggling big time to understand what has happened in my life over the last ten days and how to move forward.
I have lots of support around me in the way of friends and lawyers now but I wonder is everyone just telling me what I want to hear so hence the post.
I will take any and all advice you can offer in advance I appreciate every one that takes the time to offer that or their experience.
Back story( messy) I got into a relationship 4 years ago with a man I fell head over heels in love with. It was by all accounts the most amazing passionate authentic love story. We fought like hell for our relationship and to hold on to our love with each other. We idolized each other. Couldn’t keep away from each other.
He was American and I was European. He was married when I met him ( coming out of it the marriage had broken down) and I was single. We both had children.
He was slightly broken and defeated in life when I met him, and I wasn’t. I was confident productive and in the least egotistical way I was successful both professionally and as a person I had complete peace.
Aside from falling in love with him.. I truly wanted to be a part of fixing him and his problems. That’s what love is after all?
I spent the 1st year in a semi long distance relationship and I did everything I could to help him and he loved me so intensely the love felt unbeatable.
During this time I was suspicious slightly of some minor or possibly major white lies he told about his ex and invariably the pressure on our relationship mounted we broke up and he moved back in with his ex and kids within a few weeks.
I was devastated truly heart broken all the plans of the future lost forever….
Then 3 weeks later he came back, said he had a mistake that they were still living together but the relationship was now firmly over.. and I believed him. I was still in love with him .. And took him back with open arms.
We started to talk about our plans again and within a month of that I noticed some more white lies, called his ex and found out no there were in therapy and she believed they were trying to fix it.
His life blew up and in that moment he revealed he was a scared spoilt little boy who was afraid of the financial and emotional trauma that his ex was inflicting and imparting on him over the guilt of leaving his family and he was lying to us both because he didn’t know what else to do. But that he loved me and only me and he was truly sorry, he entered rehab and emerged a week or two later and reached out again with determination that this time he has straightened himself out.
I know what you are thinking … Don’t tell me you believed him again. Yes I did, I loved him and I was for the 1st time in my life truly weak for something or someone.
We got back together and this time it was full throttle … got engaged and I moved to the USA where we started to blend our families.
Accept he wasn’t divorced his ex was now avenging him and she wasn’t going to make my life or his life easy and in fact she made it hell.
In the middle of this his ex moved states to deliberately try and unsettle us break us up and we moved also.
We needed a house and his funds were locked down .. due to his divorce. We found a house and had 7 days to close and buy it. I didn’t have the cash available but he put a huge amount of pressure on me to do this for our family and I put together a hasty deal to finance and close the house in 7 days.
We get married a month or so later.
Fast forward a year and he is paying a huge amount of alimony every month to his wife and his income has dropped but he keeps paying it all of his income and rest from savings … and I start questioning how it is sustainable and why he won’t change it and I challenge it , the rows start and they get thicker and faster. He is also paying for increased costs in our new life together with me.
I had also come under huge financial pressure as I have depleted my savings to service him and the relationship in the early days relocating and living in an expensive area that we moved to and my brain power has eroded so I am not driving my own business.
The house finance deal starts to fall part and I start being sued … and threats for foreclose so I hire a lawyer tell my husband and I start to fix it slowly but I start to fix it.
But now there is is a new problem for him to emotionally beat and guilt me about and he becomes even more manic. I go back to part function and beg him to give me the space to figure this out.
His mental health hits the floor during that time and I find myself daily disabled mentally exhausted and tending to his every need and breakdowns.
I am a shadow of myself and at this point in a severely emotionally abusive relationship ( that I blame myself for because I am not doing enough for his mental health) and I become a reactionary emotional abuser lashing out verbally at his comments to me challenging his control of me and just generally turned into a monster to survive. It is truly toxic but in the good moments he is telling me he is so sorry and he loves me more than anything in his life.
Life becomes very messy but we still hold on to the love and he tells me he loves me asks me if I am going leave him every day of course I wasn’t going to.
Until last week … his family came in while I was out of town ( I was back in my home country sorting out a visa issue for a few weeks enjoying the break from the fighting and using the space to rebuild a friendship and marriage with him ) and my two older children were with him in America attending school.
Our coms are a mixture of arguments and him love bombing me.
All of a sudden the texts stop and calls stop in one day. He goes missing off an entire day and comes home to tell my sons they have to leave the next day that we don’t own the house( which is a lie).
He goes nuclear … Blocks all chance of me being able to contact him and his family …to find out what has happened. Emptied the house of its contents kicks my older children out ( with no parent in the country other than him )and drops our family dog to the pound then he rescinded my visa all in one day. Nuclear…
That was ten days ago I returned my kids to Europe on an emergency flight and have been trying to piece this together they loved him and we are traumatized and I am truly devastated…
No contact whatsoever and all his family had cut off coms with me I have no idea what he has told them but everything that was going on good and bad he knew about
Did he ever love me ? Was it all about financial status for him? Did he just use me ? Am I a bad person ? What is happening ?
Please be honest this is an awful time in my life.
submitted by Realistic_Collar_726 to Divorce [link] [comments]


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