~First~
A Scion of Many Worlds
Observer Wu was not sure about this next call. There had been rumours, rumours stories and absurdities from first to last. But this was one he would need to investigate thoroughly. He steels his face to a neutral position as the call goes through.
“You’re on a drone observing. I am working.” Is the first thing that comes through. A voice simultaneously deep but accompanied with a chorus of tingling bells. The image shows an enormous figure that appears to be primarily composed of shimmering white fur looking over the 3D model of a building as he directs things through the air with his right hand. Support structures, beams and building materials all soar at his direction and quickly slam themselves into place to quickly construct a large structure. “I am capable of speaking as I work, so if you have questions then ask them.”
“I am Observer Wu from Earth. I am looking for Mister Blue.
“I am one of the Blues.” The enormous figure states. “Jasper Blue, also Emmanuel Skitterway.”
The camera zooms in before something white catches onto it and it’s forced back. “Apologies, the drone is not of the best quality.”
“I would assume that a... God Emperor would have better?”
“I am directing these resources into infrastructure. Things like this sewage processing plant will not build themselves and the components that the camera drone requires are better spent ensuring that pathogens are kept out of the water, or that a medical scanner has appropriate redundancies.” Emmanuel replies as the panelling to the outside of the building start attaching itself at his direction and they’re quickly left with a solid looking structure with numerous tanks to the side.
“Alright the building is finished! Painters! Have your way with it!” He calls out and numerous people rush up with decorating supplies. “There is more for me to do. While many of the relief ships arrived with prefabricated buildings there was an unfortunate and nearly universal blindspot in their considerations.”
“Which is?”
“That while the world is settled by many respects, it was at a late iron age level at best, borderline tribal in other areas. Sewage treatment and sanitation concerns like that are simply not in their proper place. Every major and minor settlement requires a massive overhaul of it’s infrastructure in order to bring the living standards up to even industrial levels, let alone galactic levels.” Emmanuel states.
“This seems rather menial for someone ostensibly in charge of an entire planet.”
“Delegation. I have any communications and status updates relayed to me through that pursuing drone, it’s a hand’s free system, so while it is not always at one hundred percent satisfaction it allows me to lead while I also work. After all, many of the legislative concerns can be easily taken care of by my numerous assistants, but only a handful of people have the sanitation know how and willingness to work and put together sewage containment.”
“A little demeaning for one worshipped as a god.”
“I am a Primal. I’m going to be regarded as such whether I indent a throne with an ever widening rear or gunk out sewer lines, and of the two only one of them actually makes things better.” Emmanuel dismisses.
“Really. Yet you’re still not getting dirty.”
“I could do things less efficiently to look like I’ve been working hard, but honestly it’s all in the Axiom. The truth of the matter is that sewer work with even just a small amount of technology is more boring than dirty.” Emmanuel states before turning, the camera turns with him. It now shows where an entire army of workers are installing the pipes and systems for a proper sewage network. “Still, not bad eh? One year ago this place was an abandoned wreck of a smaller city. The population all but mind controlled by a group of religious fanatics who convinced them to abandon their homes and any dignity. They’ve come a long way since.” Emmanuel states.
“Have they?”
“This was the Greenstone Alliance Territory, a breakaway state from The Empire of Miru. To them the cannon was the military innovation rocking the nation.”
“I see...”
“Now they get air conditioning, indoor plumbing, heating in the winter, canned food for the leaner months, telephones to speak with their loved ones over a distance, radio for alerts and entertainment and far more.” Emmanuel states as he indicates an antenna being set up.
“All that?” Observer Wu remarks. “You seem a little... involved for a supposed god.”
“There are two so called gods on this world.” Emmanuel replies. “I, who have personally conquered much of it, wheeled and dealed with other nations and proved myself as warrior and leader both, and Yserizan. Yserizan is either the mother, grandmother or great grandmother of at least a quarter of the world population.”
“And your relationship to this Yserizan?”
“One of my wives. Our union was also a unification of Lablan as a single strong point on this world and...”
“What’s this?” A new voice asks and the camera reorients to a young woman with glowing golden hair.
“Just a camera drone, nothing to be concerned about.” Emmanuel states.
“Oh. So it’s watching us?”
“Yes.”
“And the image of the person on top of it?”
“The person watching.”
“Who is he?”
“Observer Wu.”
“And why is an Observer needed?”
“Do you recall whenever Earth or the Origins of Humanity are discussed?”
“A little? Every time I seem to get a little bit more education it just lets me see how much more there is.”
“Oh that’s very normal.” Emmanuel replies.
“If I may be introduced?” Observer Wu asks.
“I am Empress Zaviah Enlightened Luxen Divine Ascendant, ruler of Miru Reborn.”
“Miru Reborn is?”
“One of the largest empires upon Lakran. Consisting of Central Miru, The Greenstone Territories of Northern Miru and The Goldlands Unification of Southern Miru. Our population is primarily Erumenta of all types, but other peoples are of course welcome.”
“And what brought about this rebirth?” Observer Wu asks and his eyebrows go up as Zaviah points right at Emmanuel.
“Heh, guilty. Everywhere I turned the planet seemed to just be full of more and more problems that needed to stop sometime ten years ago and no one else was available. So I did the best I could.”
“And then broke armies, nations and all known limits upon people.”
“All presently known limits, what I did is only impressive when it’s weighed in that I started with only Horace’s memories and didn’t even understand how an Urthani body fully worked at the time.” Emmanuel states.
“Yes. I read that report. It was absurd.”
“It was accurate. We have all the parties involved to attest for it here on planet if you care to speak with them.” Emmanuel notes as he checks a device and nods. “All right, next is...”
“Break.” Zaviah tells him.
“Excuse me.”
“Grandmother has given ME the authority to force you into rest father!” Zaviah says with relish in her tone.
“She wouldn’t!”
“She has! If I see that you’re working too hard I can tell you to stop.”
“You do know she legally has no such authority over me right?” Emmanuel asks pointing a diamond plated claw at the comparatively tiny Erumenta who’s grinning widely at this.
“Yes, but she’ll be so disappointed that her little boy isn’t taking care of himself anymore even though he promised to and...”
“It was a mistake working so hard to make the two of you friends.” Emmanuel says in a note of false despair. “Just a moment I’ll instruct the work crew on the next few communities to proceed without me.”
“That sounds like work.”
“A text to go with Plan B rather than Plan A is not work, it’s good manners.” Emmanuel protests and raises an eye ridge as a much smaller girl tries to glare him down. “Are you sure you want to put so much force into your day by day interactions while...”
A tiny dark shape slams into Zaviah to the Erumenta’s audible protest as Magrica starts gushing about how cute it is for the little girl to finally have some grit in her gut and how she’s going to braid her hair and take her monster hunting and get her a battleaxe to go with that attitude...
Emmanuel turns to the politely puzzled Wu and shrugs.
“Motherhood does amazing things to some women. Magrica was much more openly fierce before, but she decided that all my children, adopted and otherwise, were hers to teach and nurture into proper warriors.”
“And how did she take the fact that you are technically the step parent of a quarter of the world’s population if what you told me about Yserizan is correct?”
“She has an entire squadron of Nagasha she’s training to be monster hunters. It’s actually going pretty well. The Jungle Nagasha are really appreciating it more than the other types, but the few Cloud Nagasha they have as scouts and aerial reconnaissance are fully embracing the role.”
“And how are you taking to... godhood?” Observer Wu asks his eyes penetrating.
“It grows more comfortable unfortunately.”
“Unfortunately.” Wu repeats. Not questioning, but certainly prompting.
“I’ve had to put aside my own prejudices in the matter. Humans have a bad track record with self proclaimed gods and messiahs. Too many fakes and too many holy wars. To say nothing of the cults, witch-hunts and the like. And Urthani would follow any number of faiths, but the divine figure was either some kind of Divine Truth, a more abstract theology, gods that embody concepts or something animist for the most part.”
“Did you look to The Nagasha for a better example?”
“I did, and that’s what caused me to grow more comfortable with the title. Primal Nagasha aren’t worshipped in the way humans would a prohet or saint. Seeing them as nigh infallible. No, a Primal Nagasha is simply the very best that a Nagasha can be and it can neither be stopped nor denied. While most of them are indeed leaders to follow, authorities to obey or the sources of philosophy to accept, they are not regarded as unquestionable or infallible.”
“And that is what helped?”
“It is. I was terrified that someone would misinterpret me, either honestly or malevolently, and cause immense damage in my name. A crusade to cull any politician that isn’t in the military through fire and steel, or an Urthani Colony deciding that they deserve the entire world and since not only have the strength now, but a god of their own, that they are righteous in slaughter... I had several kinds of nightmare when I let my mind wander.”
“And?” Wu prompts.
“I had a conversation. An important one with an important person. She helped me put everything in perspective. But she’s not the type to appreciate too much attention. So she’s requested I keep things quiet. But, I can say that she is an authority on the subject. And she had a fair amount to say.”
“So you’ve spoken to other so called gods of the serpent people.”
“Primal Nagasha, and yes. One has arrived already, she lives her life as quietly as she can. Another is soon to arrive. The first wanted my measure, the second wants to ensure that as a more militaristic Primal that I’m up to standard as she calls it.”
“Oh?”
“I’m part of the smallest stable demographic in the galaxy. Primals. Apparently we’re a very self policing people.”
“So in other words, you’re more a celebrity in multiple fields than some object of worship?”
“Closer to actual worship than celebrity worship I’m afraid. Still, it’s not mindless, and those that are looking for an excuse... well they’ll find another one if it’s not me. At least if someone’s trying to use my name to do something horrible it means I have all moral authority to let them know how stupid such a thing is.”
“I suppose that is an upside to an insane cult deciding that it wants to go on a rampage in your name.”
“But that’s just the thing I really had to internalize, if they’re going to do that, then they’re going to do it and I’m just their excuse. They’ll find another if I’m not available. I’m responsible for the example I set, the actions I do and the things I say. I am not responsible for how they are interpreted.”
“Interesting. Still, is there a reason you’re sharing this in particular?”
“I figured the most distressing thing that Earth would consider about my situation was my rise into divine stature. A powerful soldier can be understood, a powerful politician or businessman can also be understood, but someone being regarded as a god can not be understood within a positive context thanks to the rather terrible history of such on Earth.” Emmanuel says.
“That... is an interesting concern. However, you do not think your conquering an entire world to be a bad thing?”
“Considering that it was basically in unending war, competition and self sabotage? Yes. You see, this world was suffering over an unending brain drain due to the fact that all male colonists were lost in the initial crash of the colony ship. There were surviving males, but they were in stasis and could not be retrieved. The method that was used to ensure there would be a future population was flawed, intended as an emergency stopgap. But they didn’t have the means to move past it. So it was used over and over again. This world was nearing the breaking point.”
“And that justifies conquering it?”
“When the nation states are tearing themselves apart through mindless pride? Scheming for the sake of scheming? Or are outright predating the other states? Yes, yes it does. To not intervene would have killed, far, far more people.”
“So you justify things by saying that thye will thank you some day?’
“They thank me now.”
“And it’s sincere?”
“Yes, considering that I’ve had a woman weep with relief at getting something as simple as a pair of glasses, or another outright beg for her child and herself to be healed of the degeneration they’ve suffered. How can I consider it anything but sincere?” Emmanuel asks.
“Oh? Who are you speaking with?” A new voice asks before a massive serpent woman slithers into Wu’s field of view. Her hood is fully flared out to reveal her as Lady Yserizan as she regards things. “A human friend?”
“An Observer from earth, they’re struggling to believe all the things they’ve been told.”
“Considering some mornings I wake up scarcely believing how my life has changed for the better I don’t blame them.” Yserizan notes happily. “Still, is there anything this... Observer wants to know in particular?”
“In particular I want to know many things. I’m just saying my first hello and listening to whatever anyone wants to say to me. I’ll be visiting that world before I return to Earth so make of that what you will.” Observer Wu says.
“Of course, it might be interesting to show you the temple my daughters made for me.”
“I will admit, receiving a tour of a living god’s temple from the god themselves will be a new experience for me.” Observer Wu admits.
~First~ Last

As title says.
I hate this game gete bad publicity over a good thing.
Anyone that is complaining and down voting the game is for two reasons.
They can’t adjust in a strategy game with their cookie cutter plan.
Or they are mad an old META is busted.
It’s a great game and the RNG is awesome for some late game turning points.
This is a solid game from a small development team. It’s not buggy. It’s not automatic. Is making sensible changes.
Stop killing what little is good left in the gaming industry.
Take your problems to the “AAA” comp games if you dislike the game.
Games a damn gem. Piss off you plagues to gaming.

My Husband (30M) and I (28F) have been together for 3 years married for almost 1 year on June 3rd. We've been through a lot together. We both met at a very dark time in our lives. Since we met we have been inseparable. Mothers day is a very hard day for me. My son lives with his baby dady in another state while I live far away in another state. I'm not going to get into why I live so far away but let's just say I made a bad choice to be with an abusive man that took me far away and now I live here. I'm no longer with that man. He is serving time for what he did and that's that. I met my now husband months after. Baby daddy and I have a good relationship and allows our son to come visit me for the summer and Christmas. Now onto the issue. But first context (i had a miscarriage a couple months ago and i am still dealing with the healing process, another reason why mothers day is very hard for me). My husband took me out for sushi a day before Mothers day, because he was going to do burgers for his mom on Mothers day (his sisters idea). However while we were driving to the restaurant he says he is only going to get 1 roll while I can get whatever I want. I didnt like that. I told him I'll help pay. So I sent half the amount. We had a good time but he made it known he was ready to go home 30 min after being there. He hates sitting in restaurants to eat and prefers take out. He was only doing this for me, which I appreciated. Anyways I felt like he wasn't trying to make my Mothers day great. He seemed annoyed with everything and just wanted to sit in his chair and relax. I asked to go to crumbl cookie after for dessert and he told me to only get myself one cookie. He stayed in the truck while I went in and I got 4, a cheesecake for his mom and I, and a chocolate for him and random one He was upset but still ate it at 12 am at night. I'm still salty that he never got me a gift on Mothers day. His mom and sister both got me gifts. He got his mom a gift card. He seemed bothered that he didn't get me anything but I told him it was okay and if he wanted to drop me off at home while we were out and go get me something that'd be fine but he never did. Last year he got me a couple things on temu that were cheap. I had been trying to keep my disappointment down but its been hard. Yesterday he had to go out to get juice and was taking a while at the store when its just down the road, i thought maybe he was surpsing me because sometimes he does that but he came home and started spraying airfreshner everywhere while i was eating and had bought one of those air fresheners that sprays every 18 or 35 minutes. I complained about it and he said he was going to buy to more for the other rooms. I was so upset and kept complaining to the point he throw the air freshener in the trash. I apologized for making him feel he cant have nice things and took it out of the trash for him. Today things blew over worse and in the moment he said that I said the sushi was enough for mothers day and I said "when did I ever say that" He stormed off and I just sat there feeling nothing. Usually I'm sad when he storms off but this time I just felt nothing. So am I the a hole for being salty over mothers day even though I said it was okay?

Hi all! I am going to unburden myself from a situation that happened 12 years ago when I was getting married, as it still confuses and haunts me to this day.
Background: In my late 20s, I had a friend that I had met at work. She and I were the same age and inseparable for 2 years. We walked together during our lunch breaks, and spent time together outside of work. I considered me my best friend. We met our boyfriends at the same time, and she became engaged one month after I did.
I.was.so.excited! I thought it was so lovely to have someone so close to talk wedding stuff with who wouldn't get sick of it and understood everything. I invited her to be in my bridal party, and completely understood when she said she would be very busy and might not be able to commit to that. She told me that she wasn't having any bridal party at all, so I didn't worry that she hadn't asked me to be in hers. I thought everything was going well and was careful to be courteous of her, even scheduling my wedding to be one month afters hers so as not to interfere with her wedding. When she told me she was worried about affording her dress, I even offered to help pay for one, despite making every effort to keep costs low for my own wedding (fake flowers, make my own decorations, etc).
Then several months later, things rapidly changed. When it came time for her Bachelorette party, I showed up to the restaurant it was being held at (a place we loved going to together), and found myself to be an hour late, with things going full swing already. I am always early, so I was horrified to learn I had the wrong time. Even worse, there sat 3 people with shirts that indicated they were bridesmaids. I was so confused as to why she had lied about her bridal party, but didn't want to ruin her special day, so I just shut up and ate. Then the party moved to her house, where an XX toy party was held. Everyone got a playful name tag at the door, things like 's*kitten 'hot date', etc.
Then there was my tag: "C-dumpster". I was shocked and felt humiliated, but again, didn't want to ruin her day or look like a prude. I spent the next few hours feeling horrible, and the only time I spoke to my friend was when she berated my ideas for my hand-made decorations as 'tacky'. I left without replying, desperate for the night to end.
Then the straw that broke the camel's back came: my wedding. She brought her roommate as her plus one (not her now-husband), and I later heard they spent the night loudly insulting my wedding and decorations, bullying my out of town friends into giving up their assigned table, and the roommate harassed one of my husband's friends so badly that he left early. The kicker to all of this is that they went in together on a wedding gift for me: a $25 Chili's gift card. I spent hundreds on her present, and I would have rather she give me none at all rather than that.
After my wedding she pretended I didn't exist anytime our paths crossed, which left me in limbo over what had gone so horribly wrong in our relationship. I never did figure out why she suddenly hated me, and it has haunted me to this day. Thank you for reading my huge wall of text, I appreciate the chance to unburden myself.

I was writing a bit of code earlier today, and I had 8 different methods that followed a similar pattern of how logging and metrics reporting was done based upon what kinds of errors were thrown. This set me off a bit as I would have 20 line long methods, wherein 8 to 12 lines were for logs and metrics. And, those 8 to twelves lines only obfuscate the actual logic that a future reader would want to see.
So, of course I pulled it all out and write a wrapping function. And so, every place I would call a method, I would then also call the wrapping function, `LogOutput(mySvc.SomeMethod, input1, input2))`.
This means I would need to make sure that every time the code was updated and a method was called, the engineer would need to remember to wrap the method in a logger. Now, if I had a decorator, I could avoid the logger being being forgotten, and all around let the future engineers forget it exists.
```
func LogOutput(someFun func(i0 Input0, i1 Input1) error, i0 Input0, i1 Input1) func(i0 Input0, i1 Input1) error { return func(i0 Input0, i1 Input1) error { defer FunctionToHandlePanics() {...} err := someFun(i0, i1) ...do all the stuff... return err } }
\@LogOutPut func (ms MySvc) SomeMethod(i0 Input0, i1 Input1) error {
}
```
I know that for someone unfamiliar with the pattern it may look uncouth at first, but once you've built one, the pattern is rather simple. I do not believe it obfuscates anything as as soon as you seen the decorator, you can go to the code and see exactly what it does. To be clear, I am arguing for Java/TS type decorators, and not Java type, which uses aspect magic that hides much of the behavior.
I know this debate comes up every few months on this subreddit, but it's just such a simple and nice feature that I think gets undo hate (probably, partly because of how badly Java does it). That being said, bring on the hate. :)

multiple content warnings, i’m sorry, this will be long, this isn’t even everything and it’s a damn book i am 19. i was 11 when i had to grow up. my parents decided to divorce after months of fighting, letting us know a week before my 12th birthday. you know, the classic divorce story. my dad moved out and my mom started dating people. it moved so fast. we moved to a different area, even though we had just moved into a new house a year earlier, leaving my childhood hometown behind. my mom was trying to pursue school so we were living on student aid and stamps. (i have 3 siblings, so there were 5 of us) i started middle school in that area and was doing pretty well off. then my mom got pretty serious with someone i’m going to call SOB, he doesn’t deserve a name. my mom and SOB were dating for two months before that thing proposed to my mom. we met him once before he was labeled our step dad. my mom sat us down and told us we’d be moving to idaho to be closer to her family. come to find out, the whole reason for going there was because SOB is an ex convict and he couldn’t leave idaho because that’s were his parole was.
we were told at the time that he was framed for kidnapping and he had a whole story crafted to back it up. being a kid and needing my mom, i didn’t ask or dig about it. so we moved to idaho. i started school there and immediately got death threats. i got called a hoe relentlessly for seemingly being pretty. eventually things calmed down and i had friends, but that place was tiny and once people have formed an opinion of you, there’s no changing it, so it was hard to get around.
SOB was awful to my younger brother. we’ll call this brother zayn. zayn has bad adhd and has always struggled with school. he’s one of the smartest people i know, but getting assignments in is not his forte. so as a result he’s never had the highest grades. SOB hated the fact that my brother wasn’t doing great and would literally stand there and scream at him to get his work done. there was one time that i was in my room and i started to hear my brother screaming so immediately i’m upstairs to help him, SOB was literally chasing my brother around our house with a damn bat screaming at him like a demon was coming out. i yelled at him to leave my brother alone and things just got darker after that. me and my brother were scum to him and he ran our house like the hunger games. my other little brother and my older sister were prized jewels, they got everything they wanted and more, and SOB would rub it in our faces. he even gave my dog away, i went days worrying about her and looking because i thought she had ran away, to find out that some other person had my dog now and i wouldn’t ever get her back.
fasting forward a little, SOB violated his parole by going on a trip that wasn’t fully approved and got put back in jail right before christmas. my mom completely threw herself into trying to get him out. me and my sister noticed that my mom hadn’t gotten a single thing to be santa for my brothers, so we scraped up the money we had to get gifts so my brothers wouldn’t lose their christmas spirit seeing that santa didn’t come when things were already so bad as it was. i love that i was able to do this for them, the smiles on their faces, i will never forget that christmas.
after a long time of having a very absent mother, she was able to get SOB out of jail. he came back even worse of a monster then when he left. he sexually assaulted my mom, committed all kinds of fraud, basically stole all of my papa’s retirement money, the list goes on. my mom decided she wanted a divorce and when he found out, he went crazy. he locked all of us out of our house and threw our things on the lawn. it rained, i lost so many things, a one of a kind paper mache venitian mask i had gotten on a trip with my dad to italy included.
it’s 2020 by now and we went on a trip to Texas, to meet the person my dad was dating. on the trip, I very much learned that she was not for my dad. but, all reasoning was in vain. my dad proposed, and we had literally just met her. so that was that my dad was engaged now and focused on trying to move them out to him and getting a new house. my mom decided at that time that she wanted to move too so we had a choice, move to my dads and go back to the area i grew up in, or go with my mom to another ranch town in idaho. i chose my dads. my brothers came with, but my sister stayed with my grandparents where we lived in idaho so she could graduate.
things were fine for a bit. my mom was dating a lot and even got engaged. then she told us about this other guy she had been seeing, who had given her a 500 mile ride home from somewhere. immediately suspicious, especially because she wouldn’t drop a name. come to find out other guy was SOB. SOB proposes to her again and she’s got two engagement rings from two different people. everyone was like, what the actual shit are you doing. my mom was in a very cooky state of mind, broke things off with the other guy, and stayed with SOB. there was a weekend in september that my cousin had something going on so my extended family and everything was all there and we decided there needed to be some kind of intervention. to keep things short, it didn’t go well. my mom ended up leaving and she told me and my sister that she didn’t want to be our mom anymore. found out through facebook a couple days later that my mom and SOB were married.
then came the everlasting fun of a custody battle. my step mom had gotten into my dads head saying he needed to take full custody. now i wasn’t the biggest fan of my mom at the time, but that didn’t mean i never wanted to see her. my parents hated each other. there were a few times in exchanges that the cops ended up being called.
for a while my dad had pretty bad anger issues. low blood sugar, overstimulation, bad smells, anything could set him off. i just so happened to have a very large target on my back so i got the brunt of everything. i wouldn’t let him yell at my brothers and this resulted in me getting the lashings, but i would do it all again if that meant protecting my brothers. he wasn’t angry all the time, there were a lot of good days, but it was definitely pretty tortuous for a while. a lot of the problem, which i knew would happen to begin with, was my step mom. she is one of the laziest people i’ve ever known, which is the complete opposite of my dad. my dad likes to do things, he’s always active. so he was frustrated because he would want to do things with his wife there, and she would almost always refuse, so she could have a quiet day in bed. my step mom had also convinced herself that i was stealing from her. she ransacked my room multiple times, to no avail. she took my car keys ‘until she could prove i was taking things from her’ and i only got them back because they were sick of giving me rides places. she actually ended up stealing some of my things trying to claim they were hers, so she hid them and i haven’t seen them since.
so yeah i got yelled at a lot, accused of being a thief, and my relationship with my mom was shit + the joys of high school. i have been doing musical theater my whole life. when i first got to my new high school i was so excited because, although i wasn’t able to audition for the productions companies that year, the teacher told me i was a shoe in for the next year. she ended up leaving and we got a new teacher, if you can even call her that. so it’s my junior year, the first year with her, and it wasn’t bad, i got some good parts and did really well. i ended up getting nominated for an award for one of my performances and it was at this time, i don’t know what happened, but she did not like me anymore. she told me that she accepted the nomination for me, but i found out not too long later that she never accepted it and i was in favor to win so the judges were very puzzled by it. she accepted my friends nominations and kinda rubbed it in my face that i never got anything back. like’ awe are you sad because you didn’t hear anything from the judges? well so and so over here did😈’
the summer after that year i cut my hair pretty short. i wouldn’t say i’m not ‘girly’ but i definitely have a more masculine ‘bro’ persona comparatively. so now it’s my senior year, it matters a lot more at this point to try for good parts because it’s my last run. to keep it simple, my teacher wouldn’t cast me because i was too masculine, not even as a guy ?? idk make it make sense. i got one part my entire senior year, and i know it’s not because i’m bad. but i wrote and produced my own show that ended up being 100x the quality of the shows she produced, so i did get redemption. long story short, it really sucks to watch the peers your just as good as continue to succeed, while you get kicked out of the room for being distracting when you haven’t said a word. the reason they didn’t like me ? i’m good at improv, i kid you not i was told i was too creative and it bothered them. i know my presence scared the teachers there because i’m not a classic conformist theater kid that does anything and everything the teacher says.
anyways, so after years of trying to rekindle a relationship with my mom, fighting with an ass teacher and getting yelled at almost daily, a lot of worth questioning, and a flurry of weed later, i graduated.
both of my brothers in this time attempted to end their lives and were in facilities for a bit. i decided at that time to move in with my mom to hopefully help our relationship. it did a lot. me and my mom are best friends now. but it hasn’t been because of nothing. SOB had become the most controlling narcissistic asshole and my mom was just acting having any feelings for him so he wouldn’t take everything away from her. he monitored everything my mom did. he hit my mom in an intimate moment, and almost beat zayn, but i covered him and ended up slicing my arm open on our fireplace, once again i would do this 100 times over to protect my brother. i decided i wanted to dig everything up on him that i could. what i found was mortifying. i won’t go into too much detail, but there were a lot of charges, multiple of them being SA of a child. i vowed at that moment that i would do anything it takes to get him back behind bars. he’s actively on the offender list and he works across the street from a preschool, not on my fukin watch ass hat.
i will never forget the true terror on my moms face that that man caused. it got to the point where my mom would get really scared if she started crying because she knew he’d freak out at her if he noticed. i came back to my locked room, that i have the only key to, with holes in my walls in weird places, and in my bathroom too. a couple days before, my brother found a camera in his room, so i knew what it was and that SOB was spying on me. i taped them all up and came to stay at my bfs house and have been here since. after months of his treacherous cycle my mom had enough and left to a safe house, she’s there now. the divorce is going though but from some reason the stupid system denied my mom a protective order against him. he has full access to our house and things right now, and he’s trying to make 90,000 so he can baile his way out of the insurance fraud case against him that could get him back in jail in june. i’m so worried he’s selling my things because he so would. everything i have left is in that house and it’s all at his whim now.
when i moved in with my mom, i started a job at a fancy high end restaurant because i knew it would be good money. i’ve had problems with this my entire life, but ever since starting my job there, i have experienced countless creeps who have sexualized me in more ways then i thought possible. it’s made me feel so worthless. it’s people i work with and people who come in. drunk guys from the bar are the worst, and they’re all filthy rich so they don’t care about a thing in the world. i need to quit but i don’t know where else to go
my dad has now decided as of like two weeks ago, that he will be moving to florida. i never anticipated him moving across the country and leaving the last place i could call home. he also started therapy a couple months ago and his anger issues are pretty much nonexistent at this point. so i got my dad back but now he’s leaving again. i always hoped that as i got older, my family would always be pretty close, close enough that i could seem them once a week if i wanted. it’s really killing me because i was so close to that, to getting my family back. my sister has been in france the last couple years and she’s coming back in a couple weeks. my dad will be moving almost immediately after. we finally got to a point where my mom is free, my dad is happy, we’re all healing, and now my family will be broken up more then ever before by distance. my parents don’t hate each other anymore, my sister is coming home, we would all be able to spend time together again, never more.
so i’m at this point now, where i’ve been fighting for my family, taking every hit with hope in my heart for something i was so close to having, for 7 years i’ve been hoping. and just like that, the light at the end of this very long, cold and dark tunnel fades, and i’m left once again, in the cold dark nothingness that is hoping for a better day, that will never come.
so i’m left questioning, is overcoming another mountain worth it if there’s a whole range of painful climbing ahead of me? i’m so tired, my whole body hurts every day, my mind and soul are toiled with the pain of my lifetime, everyone in my family is moving on with their own paths and it’s only a matter of time before i’m only hearing from them every once in a while. i don’t want to do life, the world is so messed up right now and i don’t see it getting better. there’s too much pain and i can’t handle it. nothing seems worth hoping let alone living for anymore. i bid you adieu and wish you all the best 💗

The next morning, Himiko was awakened by a delighted scream. She shot up in her bed and saw Tenko dancing around the room.
"Nyeh...Tenko? W-What's going on?" Himiko asked sleepily, rubbing her eyes.
"La-la-la-la-la-laaaaaa!!" Tenko sang. Then, she stopped at Himiko's bed and gripped Himiko's shoulders like a crazy person. "Himiko! I ate your Snoozydoodles right before bed, like you told me to, and I just had the most amazing dream!!"
"What was it about?" Himiko asked.
"There were no degenerate males in the world! And all the girls made me their queen!" Tenko sighed. "It was perfect utopia! A utopia...for girls! The sky was pastel pink! The clouds were extra puffy and white! The ocean was also pink and glittery, and all the food we ate was pink, like strawberry cake, strawberry ice cream, strawberry cupcakes, and strawberry milk! And girls of every shape, size, and color were everywhere! Not a degenerate male in sight!"
"Nyeh...a dream filled with just girls sounds like a nightmare," Himiko muttered. "Most problems I had with bullying was from catty, popular girls."
"W-What?! There's no way that's true, Himiko!" Tenko cried. "Maybe they were males in disguise!"
"No, I don't think so," Himiko shook her head. "Plus, a world with just girls is going to lead to extinction."
"Not in my dream!" Tenko exclaimed happily. "Girls were born from 'Girl Flowers!'"
"Nyeeeh...girl flowers? " Himiko asked, raising a brow.
"Yeah! You plant a pink seed into the ground, and when it grows, the petals open up and reveal a beautiful baby girl inside!" Tenko gushed. "It was so amazing! Girls, girls, girls everywhere!" Himiko wrinkled her nose.
"I bet it smelled like fish in that world," she muttered.
"Fish?! Why would it smell like-...oh! Hahahaha!" Tenko said. "No, no, Himiko! We didn't have to deal with that because there was need for it! All the girls came from 'Girl Flowers,' remember?"
"Oh...I guess that's true," Himiko replied, shaking her head at the absurdity. Suddenly, there was a knock at their door. Tenko went over to open it. Standing on the other side were Tsumugi, Angie, Maki, Miu, Gonta, Ryoma, and Kaito.
"Hey! What are you all doing here?!" Tenko demanded. "Especially you degenerates!" Ignoring Tenko, they all rushed right in and crowded around Himiko's bed. Himiko nervously pulled her blanket up to her face.
"Nyeh...c-can I help you guys?" she whimpered.
"I had the most wonderful dream because of your cookies, Himiko!" Angie chirped. "Everyone in the whole wide world became a follower of Atua, and was welcomed into his kingdom!"
"I had a dream that I finally went to space!" Kaito exclaimed. "And I became the world's best astronaut for discovering a lot of alien civilizations! Everyone voted for me to be president of Earth!"
"There's no way such a title exists," Maki said, shaking her head.
"Well, maybe not in real life, but that's how it was in my dream!" Kaito said. "But, anyways, what was your dream about, Maki Roll?" Everyone turned to Maki, curious to what kind of dream she had. She blushed.
"I'd...rather not talk about it," she grumbled. "It's too dumb."
"Just tell us already, Judge Moody!" Miu spat impatiently. Maki glared at her, then sighed.
"Fine..." she said. "I had a dream where I wasn't an orphan, and I had real, actual parents who loved me. And I was happy and nice to everyone, and I didn't have to worry about being an assassin and stealing peoples' lives." Everyone stared in stunned silence at her. Maki sighed gloomily. "See? I told you it was dumb."
"Geez, that's not dumb at all," Ryoma said. "Sounds similar to my dream, though, I would agree if you had said that wishing for it to happen would be dumb."
"What do you mean, Ryoma?" asked Tsumugi.
"It's pointless to dream or wish for something that will never come true," Ryoma explained. "Even though my dream was...surprisingly delightful, it also felt like a punch in the gut. Hmph...I don't know whether to call that dream a blessing, or a curse."
"What was your dream about?" Kaito asked.
"Well, I'll tell you, but it is depressing," Ryoma warned. "My girlfriend hadn't been killed, and I was back home with her and my cat. And I didn't even play tennis, I wasn't even an Ultimate student. I was a regular guy."
"That doesn't sound depressing at all!" Kaito said.
"But, the fact that it'll never come true is what makes it depressing," Ryoma said. "That's why I say, dreams like that are pointless. It's better to forget about the past and move on with your life"
"Bullshit!" Kaito exclaimed. "C'mon, man, stop whining about how depressing your life is! You say that wishing for the impossible is dumb and it was all in the past, or whatever, so why the hell are you still depressed? If you truly believed that you should move on, you should stop worryin' about the past and look to the future with bright hopes! That goes for you, too, Maki!"
"What? Why me?" Maki asked.
"It's true that you can't change the past, and maybe wishing for it to change is dumb," Kaito explained. "But, if you're still depressed about what happened in the past, it means you can't let go of what happened! You're not moving on! Moving on is accepting what happened, and doing whatever you can to make your life better! Instead of wishing to undo the past, wish for a brighter future! That goes for all of you!" The room fell silent as they stared at Kaito.
"So, anyway, my dream was about me actually becoming the characters that I cosplay!" Tsumugi said, breaking the silence.
"Hey! Don't just ignore my inspirational speech!" Kaito exclaimed angrily.
"It really wasn't all that inspiring," Tsumugi said, haughtily waving him off.
"Seriously! Nobody asked for your opinion, Mahatma Ghandeez Nuts!" Miu said to Kaito.
"W-What?! " Kaito exclaimed.
"Ha! In my dream, I was the world's best inventor!" Miu said grandly. "With my inventions, I was able to rid the world of starvation, war, violence, famine, and all that other bad shit! And everyone loved me! All the guys on the planet wanted to bang me, and my boobs grew a size bigger!"
"Um...can you not share your dreams?" Tsumugi said. "I feel like every time you speak, I want to do unspeakably horrible things to you."
"Shut the hell up, you four-eyed, lamebrain otaku! " Miu spat. "You're just jealous because you have two deflated balloons for chest!"
"Um...can Gonta share dream, now?" Gonta asked.
"Yes, Gonta, go ahead," Tsumugi replied, eager to not have to listen to Miu anymore.
"Gonta was king of bugs!" Gonta replied. "Everyone in world loved bugs, and loved King Gonta!"
"Tuh...that dream sounds stupid as shit!" Miu scoffed.
"Oh! G-Gonta sorry..." Gonta apologized with a hurt expression.
"You don't have to apologize to her, Gonta," Tsumugi said, glaring at Miu.
"You want someone to apologize to, apologize to all of us for wastin' our time!" Miu spat to Gonta.
"Hey! Cut it out, Miu! Stop yellin' at him!" Kaito yelled.
"Don't tell me what to do, Luke Skyfucker!" Miu shouted back.
"Stop callin' me names!" Kaito yelled back.
"H-Hey! Why everyone fighting?" Gonta asked. "Gonta not mean to start fight!"
"Leave it up to a degenerate male to start a fight!" Tenko growled, glaring at Gonta.
"If you guys don't stop fighting, Atua will unleash his holy wrath upon you all," Angie warned with a creepy grin.
"Nobody asked you, you kooky cult bitch!" Miu said, swatting at Angie. "All y'all are just jealous because my dream was better that yours!"
"Excuse me?!" Tsumugi cried.
"Yeah! Obviously mine was the best one!" Kaito exclaimed.
"You're plainly wrong! Mine was the best one!" Tsumugi said.
"No, it was mine!" Tenko shouted.
"Nuh-uuuhhhh...it was mi-iiiine," Angie said cheerfully.
"Um...Gonta thinks Gonta's was pretty good," Gonta said diplomatically.
"Sheesh...I can't believe everyone is getting so worked up over this," Ryoma said.
"Seriously. It's stupid to be fighting over something like this," Maki agreed.
"Well, I don't think it's stupid at all!" Tsumugi said.
"Yeah! In fact, I want another dream!" Miu said. Everyone turned to Himiko, who had been staring at them in horrified silence. "You better whip us up some more cookies, ya little midget, or else!"
"Well, um...you'll have to wait next weekend," Himiko replied in a small voice.
"I ain't waitin' that long!" Miu spat. "So, chop, chop! Get to makin' those damn cookies right now!"
"Nyeh, but...what about school?" Himiko asked.
"Himiko's right, we need to get ready for school," Maki said. But...I think I'd also like more of the cookies." Everyone turned to her in surprise.
"Wait...really, Maki?" Tsumugi asked.
"It was...a really good-tasting cookie...that's all," Maki mumbled, fiddling with one of her pigtails.
"Or is it because you liked your dream?" Angie teased. Maki frowned at her.
"Shut up," she said.
"I...agree with Maki," Ryoma said. "I want to see if I would have a different dream. One that's more...sensible."
"A dream that's...sensible? " Tsumugi repeated.
"Yeah...one that keeps me away from my past," Ryoma explained. "Do you think you can do that for me, Himiko?"
"Nyeh...okay," Himiko said. She knew exactly how to do just that.
Part Twelve
"What was all that ruckus about earlier, Monkey Buns?" Kokichi asked as he and Himiko walked together to school.
"Nyeh...just as I was hoping, my Snoozydoodles gave everyone dreams," Himiko replied. "But, when everyone that I gave them to was talking about their dreams, things got a little out of hand."
"Was that the effect of the magic?" Kokichi asked.
"Well, no...that was because Miu was being her usual, annoying self, and then Tsumugi said something, then Miu snapped back at her, then everything sorta erupted into chaos," Himiko explained.
"Didn't you say a while ago that the dream powder can be addictive?" Kokichi asked. Himiko sighed.
"Yeah...even small doses of the dream powder might cause someone to be addicted," she said. "But, it works really well, and that's why I wanted to put it in my cookies."
"Hmm...I hope you know what you're doing, Himiko," Kokichi said.
"Well...I have another idea where the dream powder might be not as addictive...but the effects will be just as good?" Himiko said with a bit of uncertainty. Then, she blushed. "I...used this method to dream about you before we started dating." Kokichi raised his eyebrows at her.
"Really?!" he exclaimed, grinning.
"Yeah...I had to steal your hair while you were asleep to do it, though," Himiko said quietly.
"Yeah, that's not creepy at all," Kokichi teased, wrapping his arm around Himiko's waist, and giving her a kiss on the cheek. A mischievous grin crossed his lips. "I wanna know what this other method is."
***
Friday night had arrived. Kokichi was with Himiko in her secret magic room. She was flipping through the spellbook titled, "Inside the Magical Mind." Himiko showed Kokichi the chapter "Build the Perfect Dream," specifically, the romance section.
"Nyeh...these are potions I used to have dreams about you," she explained to him, and pointed to the different dreams. "This is the 'sweet love dream' potion, the 'spicy love dream' potion, and the 'hot and steamy love dream' potion." Kokichi read the description of each dream, his impish grin growing larger across his face as he read.
"So, you drank all of those potions?" he asked, wiggling his eyebrows at her.
"Well, one night, I drank the first one, then the next night, I drank the second," Himiko said. "I secretly gave the last one to Miu, because I was too scared to drink it myself."
"Ugh! You gave it to Miu?! " Kokichi exclaimed in disgust.

"Well...I-I'd feel dirty having the last dream!" Himiko stammered.
"Well, then, why'd you make that potion in the first place?" Kokichi asked.
"Because I was curious!" Himiko said. "But, then my curiosity was replaced by fear and feeling dirty, so I gave it to Miu. It's a good thing I did, too, because..."
"Cuz, why...?" Kokichi asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Because she was doing very...dirty things with you," Himiko replied. "Yeah...we were having our monthly slumber party, and in the middle of it all, Miu was dreaming and...nyeh...screaming."
"AAAUUUUGGHHHH!!! GROSS!!" Kokichi exclaimed, covering his ears. "I don't wanna do it with her!! "
"Well, she did say that you said that to her in her dream," Himiko said. "But, you only did it to get her to shut up because she kept begging you."
"Ew, I don't care," Kokichi muttered. "There's no excuse to condone bestiality." Himiko sighed and gave Kokichi a playful swat. Kokichi laughed, then eyed her flirtatiously. "Besides, my body only belongs to you...Himiko." Himiko blushed and lowered her head. Every time he said her name like that, it got her heart pumping like crazy. "My body...is your body." Kokichi lifted her chin to turn her head to him. "Mi cuerpo...es su cuerpo, y mi corazón...es su corazón."
"Ohhhh...Kokichiiii...!" Himiko gurgled with delight, biting her lip. She didn't know Spanish, but he made it sound so good. Kokichi leaned in to give her a passionate kiss.
"Okay, that's enough!" he said, stopping the kiss abruptly.
"W-What?! Wait! No! Moooore...!" Himiko pouted, tugging on Kokichi's sleeve. "I want mooore."
"Nuh-uh, Monkey Buns. Tomorrow is another cookie sale, so we can't get distracted right now. We gotta make these cookies like Hiro...baked! " Kokichi said.
"O-kaaaayyy..." Himiko pouted.
"M'kay, so how are gonna do this, HimiCocoa Bean?" Kokichi asked.
"Well...what genre of potion should I make?" Himiko asked. "There's comedy, action-adventure, romance, horror, fantasy, mystery, aaannnd...lots of other stuff."
"Comedy!" Kokichi said. "Everyone needs a good laugh!"
"Nyeh...okay," Himiko said, then turned to the comedy section of the chapter.
"So, you'll just pour whatever potion you make into the cookie batter, right? And mix it up?" Kokichi asked.
"Yup, that's right," Himiko nodded.
"Aaaalrighty, then! Welp, do your thang, babe!" Kokichi said, kissing Himiko's cheek. Himiko giggled and read the comedy section:
~COMEDY:~
Laughter is the best medicine, as they say! So, why not have it in your dreams? After all, there's nothing cuter than someone laughing in their sleep! Whether you're in the mood for some gut-busting, slap-happy humor, wild, crazy humor, or even just simple, laughable jokes, every hilarious dream is welcome in clown town!
Slapstick comedy dream: A dream where tripping, punching, bashing, slapping, falling, and everything in between is considered more funny than horrifying! If you fancy a dream like that, give Slapstick comedy dream a whirl!
Boil water in small cauldron. Once water is boiled, add 1/2 cup of dream powder, 1 tsp of pepper for an extra kick, 1 tsp of cinnamon for an extra bite, 1 tsp of dragon spice for an extra punch, 3 petals of the Laffodil flower, and a 3/4 cup of sunlight for some lighthearted fun. Mix contents until water becomes a different color. Pour contents into a potion bottle. Add sleep powder before consuming. Drink and enjoy!
Fun-loving comedy dream: You can't always watch comedy, you have to experience it, too! If you feel like going on a funny, fun-filled adventure full of laughter, then the fun-loving comedy dream is just what you're looking for!
Boil water in small cauldron. Once water is boiled, add 1/2 cup of dream powder, 3/4 cup of elven sparkles for whimsy, 1 cup of pink polka dot pond water, 1 tsp of sugar, 5 petals of the Laffodil flower, and 3/4 cup of sunlight. Mix contents until water becomes a different color. Pour contents into a potion bottle. Add sleep powder before consuming. Drink and enjoy!
Joker dream: Want a dream with less gut busting, and more on the relaxed side? Then, a Joker dream is prefect the perfect comfort comedy dream for you!
Boil water in small cauldron. Once water is boiled, add 1/2 cup of dream powder, 1 tsp of funny honey, 1 petal of the Laffodil flower, a pinch of jesterly ginseng powder, and 3/4 cup of sunlight. Mix contents until water becomes a different color. Pour contents into a potion bottle. Add sleep powder before consuming. Drink and enjoy!
"Nyeh...which one should I pick?" Himiko asked. Kokichi scanned the page.
"Hmm...why not all of them?" he suggested. "You can make three batches of cookies, and pour the different potions into each one! Actually, it's way more interesting that way, since people will get to randomly choose their comedy dream cookies!"
"I guess you're right," Himiko said. She got to work, whipping up all three potions. "Nyeh...all done!"
"Do you wanna go to D.I.C.E. headquarters and bake them there again?" Kokichi asked.
"Yeah, but...let's take the short way," Himiko said. "I'm already tired from making these potions." Before Kokichi could ask what she meant, Himiko snapped her fingers, and they magically appeared at the abandoned insane asylum serving as D.I.C.E. headquarters.

I mean aside from the non lethal pranks luna,sunny and star pull all the time.
There had been two events... Heavy one is Hecatia trying to kidnap the surface fairies for hell s decoration. And a lighter one being Eiki in PoFV telling Cirno that her position on heaven or hell is still not clear yet. Which by comparison was a better result than most others who were straight hell candidates. But looking at her ending it was safe to assume it have her a religious trauma syndrome for a while.
That being said, fairies are kinda the only ones being judged for heaven or hell aside from humans. That and rabbit youkai and perhaps the other surface youkai who can die in mostly normal ways and have their spirits transfer to an afterlife realm perhaps.
But the point is can fairies be bad enough to actually go to hell? With hecatia s case it was far from judgement. She was a hell goddess who simply had her reasons for wanting to abduct surface fairies to her domain (kinda similar case to okina abducting zashiki warashi to the land of backdoors). So i assume if that incident went hecatia s way, then there would just be... More hell fairies as clown piece colleagues in contrast to them going there for sin atonement? Definitely not because fairies pranks are that bad.
It s only in Cirno s case where a fairy might need to do some self reflexion. And even with that she had her powers acknowledged, so it s also not a sin of pride for her acting bossy or extra confident.
Having said all that, do please enlighten me on this matter. Thks.

I'm autistic and ADHD, and I have a big issue with getting stuff I don't need because of impulsivity. I went through a clothing phase and now have about 6 60l boxes of clothing, shoes and bags, I went through a jewellery phase where I now have 3 jewellery boxes filled, and I had a bad book collecting phase where I ended up with 246 books until summer last year (I am down to under 100 books now because I bought doubles or triples of the same book thinking I didn't have it). It's like Confession of a Shopaholic but less designer, more alternative clothing and decor, and without the debt.
When I moved last year, the movers made a joke about my stuff being more than one person's worth, which was very hurtful. My current place has a lift, but it took 7 trips to get everything in with a folding hand truck and another person. I'm planning on moving in the next month and a half into a place with just stairs, and I don't want the same comments again.
My problem is that I have such guilt about getting rid of things! I don't know how to let go of whatever memory or emotion I have attached to having gotten the item. The Marie Kondo method does not work because I'm finding joy in remembering I have something. Example: I have a set of 6 pastel coloured teacups I bought last year - they are so kitsch and adorable (though I never use them) but I can't find the nerve to donate them because I love seeing the colour splash in my shelf. I also have stuff from my grandma that I can't part with because, well, they're a memory of her.
I want to try and reduce my stuff by at least 20% in the next month - I'm currently looking as a giant TK Maxx red bag filled to the brim with shoes, clothing, tech accessories, and bags, and ready to be donated tonight to my building's donation station. It's slow, but I want to make sure I do it right and not end up back at square one.
Can anyone help me out with some tips? How did you manage to let go of things and stop the worrying that you'll end up needing something? Were there any methods that you found really helped?
Thank you in advance!

Many thanks to u/LieutenantRayne for helping my learn about the DLC through their guides.
What you'll get from this guide: Great economy, great living standards, victory in Verdosam, a new alliance with Derdia and Morella, a new wife (the inferior romance choice but alas), a new heir, reunification of the peninsula without war (no torturing Axel, sad!), the grace of god and ultimate political power.
Achievements you'll get: Prologue, chapter stuff, Great Unification, Intermekopum alliance, Wruceh's Second Coming, True Master of Crisis (unsure about that one), Glovurius axa Rizia axa Pales, The Prince, Fall from GRACE, Domineering, Mine All Mine, Ready To Love Again, Case Closed, My Rule Continues, Game Of Spoons or Two Birds for Beatrice, So It Is and Make Yourself Great Again.
Notes: Be polite even to your enemies and say Halaita alot.
PROLOGUE - Visit family in Zille, close friebds with Pabel, university (+1B), crackdown on traitors (+1A), rebuild (+1B), truly love your wife, family got in the way of work, vacation with wife and daughter, solace in faith, meet duke and agree with him, lie to dad, don't tell anything to your father, gold and tax focus (+2B and +1B per turn). Absolutism, Diversify (+1B), Third Way and no military spending (+1B).
TURN 1: A(8/+3) B(11/+6) E(3/+1).
Decrees=> Sovereign Transition and Clemency (-1A), Raise base income tax (-2A, +1B per turn), Geological Survey (-2A, -2B), Zpana Dam (-2A, -5B, 4T to complete, +3E per turn on completion) and Expand Esqiris Gas Field (-1A, -3B, 3T to complete, +2E per turn on completion).
Events=> No speech at coronation, allow vina in the council, small parade at Port Drazon, host concert (-1B), no sanctuaries restoration :( and football auto-skips due to lack of budget.
TURN 2: A(3/+3) B(7/+7) E(4/+1).
Decrees=> Housing for the poor (-1A, -1B) and Build Qalus Gold Mine (-1A ,-3B).
Events=> Oil dries up, trade talks with Sordland (invite Elena): Accept alcohol deal "is there a way to rephrase this?" accept resort deal "less gaudy", investigate dad's death thanks to Pabel (leave him out of the suspects), donate to Arufelde (-1B, makes dealing with Morella easier), build statues of all the family (-1B, +1A), in the hunt go with Hugo but tell him Vina and Rico are cousins after that go back with your daughter, ignore commie propaganda (we need to get in Hegel's good side) and be polite with Smolak regime.
TURN 3: A(5/+3) B(8/+7) E(4/+0).
Decrees=> Monqiz Port and Naval Expansion (-1A, -3B, 2T to complete, -1E per turn on completion) and Sallabes Consumer Park (-2A, -2B, 2T to complete, -1E per turn on completion).
Events=> Fund Golden Guard and focus on Su Omina (-3B), denounce Su Omina, accept Rumburg MAXIMUM energy deal (-3E, +2B and -2E per turn), deny police transfer to idiot Rico, tell manus to fuck off and don't let him dance with Vina, allow safe passage for Goldoncondists, rizz Lucita up (grab ger hand, don't le go etc) and refuse deal with Rusty but have lunch with him.
TURN 4: A(6/+4) B(9/+9) E(0/+0).
Decrees=> Build Tank Factory (-3A, -4B/ ONLY AFTER WINE TRADE SOARS!!!)
Events=> Disperse protests by force (+1A), Pales Stuff: Say u wanna talk to Axel and DON'T initiate blockade - Say to him to keep the field in exchange for something, "don't let hostility colour the negotiations", "predecessors were out of line", "caught between superpowers", "how big of a parachute?" - Pay what he asks and tell him about your daughter (-5B, -3B per turn and +3E per turn later), send 500 equipment abd 50 support vehicles to Verdosam, tell Alvarez to fuck off - at the AN meeting: don't interrupt Smolak, applaud him politely, don't applaud Lespia, don't confront Hegel, Speech: "Honor to adress assembly", focus on unity, Smolak is being understandable and you'll count with his transparency, "Morella looking is east is understandable", offer help to Morella, say a compromise with religious travellers is possible, "regarding Pales", "golden age" and "end cycle of violence" - attend H.o.D and give rights to all workers (-2B, -1B per turn, industrial power weakened), NO Wehlen cooperation (We won't get Smolak in the alliance but he's an asshole anyways), wine trade soars (+2B) - Wine Event Speech: "fruits of our lands", "yes, even Sords", "doubts about stability", "with your help", "proud son of Valenqiris", "richly rewarded", "rise a glass to a reunited Rizia" and "you're here to drink wine" - Invite Lucita to open the bottle, rizz her up, say good night to staff, play drinking game (No Pablo), get something to wrong to gwt drunk, say you're lonely. If things goes right Lucita will knock on your door and have sex with you,. Sordland Investment auto-skips (no money).
TURN 5: A(8/+4) B(5/+5) E(0/+1)
Decrees=> Build Military Eq. Factory (-1A, -2B), Build Support Vehicles Factory (-2A, -3B), Sell 1st Batch of Military Eq. (+2B/ immediatly AFTER football auto-skips AKA after Hegel's Call) and enforce Wruceh education (-3A).
Events=> Agreement with Wehlen: *Import Oil and Medicine, *Export Wine and Small Arms, *Aid against BFF, *Ban Bluds and *Grant Wehzeks equal rights to work. Fund no organization in Zille, continue investigating Du Omina (-1A) and ask about Iza and give control to Lucita, tell Titus to look into Hugo, Football auto-skips :), complain to Hegel about the late hour so you can cut Lespia out for ships, be polite to Alma and DON'T eat the cookies (they're horrible), tell her about spliting Lespia's shares 50-50 between you and Morella, at plane - Speak with Derdia, Energy Agreement and Pollution reparations (-1B/ Make sure to do this in the plane to get the toy bird), Vina diplomatic envoy, send sordish tourists back home, Gas Field meeting - Tell Vina to be diplomatic envoy, "Absolutely not!", "single", "handsome" - Scrap Boat (-1A).
TURN 6: A(4/+3) B(8/+7) E(4/+4).
Decrees=> Enact investment in Public Transport (-2A, -3B, 1E/ FIRST THING TO DO AT THE START OF THE TURN! If u don't u get transport crisis), Excavation of Topes (-2A, -2B, 2T to complete) and Medium Energy Sale (-3E, +2B/ AFTER council meeting to avoid energy crisis - always one step ahead of Torpor).
Events=> Massive Global Media Campaign (-3B/ SUPER IMPORTANT!), send 1 infantry div. to confederacy, DON'T start war, Axel talk - Shake hand, don't interrupt, "peace", "peaceful resolution", let soldiers leave immediatly, "i do not underestimate the gravity", "what would we gain?", "I'm starting to suspect that", "someone else", "Lespia", "this is precisely the point", "why wouldn't he?" and "anything for peace"(-1B), sign paper and talk about cooperation and friendship (+6E, +6E per turn).
TURN 7: A(3/+3) B(8/+8) E(13/+7)
Decrees=> Abolish Blasphemy Law(-3A/ SUPER IMPORTANT).
Events=> Invite Sal to H.o.D, don't fund Zille, Grand Wiseman Talks - Let Titus fight don't talk to him or interrupt him, Trade deal (-2E, +2E per turn) and mediation with Morella - Send 1 ship and 1 sub to confederacy, Hugo will tell Toras are happy, order Manus arrest, rid Rico of his title put Iza under your control, tell Hugo you're but that's it, improve enviroment (-3B), Azaros and Lucita will be happy, go to private lounge with her.
TURN 8: A(6/+7) B(16/+9) E(13/0).
Decrees=> Increase Health and Education Funds (-2A, -3B), Tenant Protection Laws (-2A, -1B), Remove Provincial Police and Levy Obligation (-8A, -2B/ SUPER IMPORTANT/ Do it AFTER meditation investment/ U get enough authority for it through the dissolution of the H.o.D) and Small Energy Sale (-1E, +1B/ Necessary to remove Provincial Levy Obligation).
Events=> Host banquets to celebrate victory (+2A,-2B,+2B per turn), don't reveal Lespia evil doings to the world, be polite to drunk Alvarez and reveal the your findings at the end of the conversation so he can offer a deal to arrest Rusty - take it, arrest Rusty, nationalize his assets by buying shares (-2B), invest in renewable energy (-3B), welcome brave sailors back home, invest 1A in Derdia-Morella talks (SUPER IMPORTANT), close H.o.D (+A), -3B for Intermekopum, (SUPER IMPORTANT) , Smolak will ask the AN for a referendum, AN Stuff - Vote Nay to island claim, interrupt smolak bullshit speech, in your own speech talk about the importance of treaties, how bad people are treated by Wehlen, how Wehlen doesn't respect democracy and that Weheln wants to stela land, if done correctly AN will vote against referendum and you'll get Zille back (hooray!) - Talk to Vina about marriage with Axel respect her but tell this is the best for Rizia - she'll say yes :) - don't give ring her so u can give to Lucita, marry Lucita through Sal, be polite at the weeding and reveal your own with Lucita (Taddeus Azaro will have an orgasm).
TURN 9: A(9/+9) B(11/+10) E(12/-1)
Decrees=> lower conscription to 18 (-2A, -2B, +1000 men) and Launch Anti-Narcotis Campaign (-1A, -1B/ reduces tourism and doesn't last. Now is the best time).
Events=> Derdia-Morella Talks: offer -250 men, vote yes to new MITZ, offer -5E for Intermekopum (alliance formed +10A), Accept aid from Valgsland (+2B), leave Grace (middle finger if Sordland Save or correct spoon shit), Zille is returned! Give it to yourself (Great Living Standards + Cucked Sazons = No unrest), Wruceh Guardians (-1B) and Pales Unification Plans (-2B).
TURN 10: A(15/+19) B(17/+9) E(8/+1).
Decrees=> Expanded Border Guards (-2A, -1B/ Now because it reduces tourism and it's one less red modifier).
Events=> In the meeting with Titus say Luciat is innocent, declare that Hugo is guilty but just keep an eye on him (he's loyal and much better than his smooth-brained son), execute Manus and Rusty for all to see, drink with Axel and reassure that palensians will be respected, declare Theocracy, make your son the heir to get achievement and Azaros on thw jubilee, finally, enjoy becoming Rizia's Lisan Al Gaib and lead your people to paradise.
Hope you enjoyed the guide! I might make one for a reformist + Pabel romance run. No promises though.

igs link
11-11 Memories Retold 12 is Better Than 6 A Juggler's Tale A Musical Story A Tale of Paper: Refolded ABZU Aces & Adventures Achtung! Cthulhu Tactics Ad Infinitum ADOM (Ancient Domains Of Mystery) Adventures of Chris AER Memories of Old Agatha Christie - The ABC Murders Ageless Aggelos Alex Kidd in Miracle World DX Amanda The Adventurer AMID EVIL Ancient Enemy Andro Dunos II Anomalous Apocalipsis Arcade Spirits Arto Arx Fatalis Asterix & Obelix XXL 2 Backfirewall_ Banners of Ruin Battle Axe Battlestar Galactica Deadlock Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Anabasis Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Armistice Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Ghost Fleet Offensive Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Modern Ships Pack Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Reinforcement Pack Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Resurrection Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Sin and Sacrifice Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: The Broken Alliance Bear With Me - Collector's Edition BEAUTIFUL DESOLATION Beyond the Long Night Big Bang West Biped Black Skylands BLACKHOLE Blacksad: Under the Skin Blind Fate: Edo no Yami Block'Em! Blood And Zombies Bosorka Bot Vice Bots Are Stupid Bravery and Greed Breathedge Bridge Constructor: The Walking Dead Broken Edge Brunch Club Call of Juarez: Gunslinger Call of the Sea Car Mechanic Simulator 2014 Castle on the Coast Cavity Busters Chop Goblins Chroma Squad Citizen Sleeper Clustertruck Colt Canyon Cook, Serve, Delicious! Cook, Serve, Delicious! 3?! Coromon Creepy Tale Creepy Tale 2 Creepy Tale 3: Ingrid Penance Crumble Curse of the Dead Gods Cyber Hook Danger Scavenger Dark Deity Dead Age 2 Dead End Job Deadly Days Dear Esther: Landmark Edition Death Squared DEATHRUN TV Deceive Inc. Deep Sky Derelicts Demon Pit Demon Turf Desert Child DESOLATE Destroyer: The U-Boat Hunter Devil Spire Dice Legacy Disciples: Liberation DOOM (1993) DOOM 3 DOOM 64 DOOM II Double Double Cross Dragon Spirits Dread Templar Dreams in the Witch House Dreamscaper DUSK DUSK '82: ULTIMATE EDITION Dwarven Realms Edna & Harvey: The Breakout - Anniversary Edition Elven Legacy Collection Embr ENCODYA Ephemeral Tale Epic Chef Epistory - Typing Chronicles Eternal Edge + Eternal Threads Eventide 3: Legacy of Legends Evergarden Everhood Exiled Kingdoms Fallback Fallout 3 Fantasy Blacksmith Farm Frenzy: Refreshed First Class Trouble Five Dates Fobia - St. Dinfna Hotel Foretales FOREWARNED Founders' Fortune Frog Detective 1: The Haunted Island Frog Detective 2: The Case of the Invisible Wizard From Space Funtasia Game Dev Studio Ganryu 2 Garbage Garden Story Giana Sisters: Twisted Bundle God’s Trigger Going Under Golden Light Golf Gang Golf With Your Friends - OST Good Knight Grand Mountain Adventure: Wonderlands Grotto Growth Guild of Darksteel Gunlocked Gunlocked - The 2nd Gunning Guts and Glory Hands of Necromancy Hellbound Hello Neighbor Hide and Seek Hellslave Hellstuck: Rage With Your Friends Hero of the Kingdom: The Lost Tales 2 Hiveswap Friendsim HIVESWAP: ACT 1 Hocus Pocus Home Sweet Home Honey I Joined a Cult Hospital Tycoon Hot Brass Hover Hue Human: Fall Flat HUMANKIND Definitive Edition Hyposphere I Am Fish I am not a Monster Idol Hands Impulsion In Between In Other Waters In Sound Mind Inquisitor Deluxe Edition Interrogation: You will be deceived Iron Danger Ironcast Jack Move Jewel Match Solitaire Jewel Match Solitaire 2 Collector's Edition Jewel Match Solitaire L'Amour Jewel Match Solitaire Winterscapes Jewel Match Twilight Jewel Match Twilight Solitaire Joggernauts Juicy Realm Juno: New Origins [previously titled Simplerockets 2] Just Die Already JYDGE Kaichu - The Kaiju Dating Sim Karma City Police Ken Follett's The Pillars of the Earth King of Dragon Pass King of the Castle Kingdom: New Lands King's Bounty II Kitaria Fables Kraken Academy!! Lacuna Lamentum Landlord's Super Last Call BBS Latte Stand Tycoon + Lawn Mowing Simulator Letters - a written adventure Lichdom: Battlemage Light Fairytale Episode 1 Light Fairytale Episode 2 Lila’s Sky Ark Loddlenaut Looking for Aliens Looterkings Lords and Villeins Lost Castle Lost Words: Beyond the Page Ludus Lumberhill Machinika Museum Mad Experiments: Escape Room Mad Tracks Magenta Horizon MageQuit MagiCat Major Stryker Math Rescue May's Mysteries: The Secret of Dragonville Remastered Mech Mechanic Simulator Mediterranea Inferno Meeple Station Mega Man Legacy Collection Men of War: Assault Squad - Game of the Year Edition Metro 2033 Redux Metro: Last Light Redux Milky Way Prince – The Vampire Star Mind Scanners Mini Thief Monorail Stories Monster Slayers Monster Slayers - Advanced Classes Unlocker Monster Slayers - Fire and Steel Expansion Morbid: The Seven Acolytes Mortal Shell Mr. Prepper My Lovely Wife Mystic Towers Mythic Ocean Nebuchadnezzar Neverinth NEXT JUMP: Shmup Tactics Nigate Tale Nihilumbra Nine Witches: Family Disruption Nippon Marathon Noir Chronicles: City of Crime Northmark: Hour of the Wolf Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee Omen Exitio: Plague One More Line Orbital Bullet Orwell: Keeping an Eye On You Osteoblasts OTTTD Out of Space OUT OF THE BOX Outliver: Tribulation Overloop Overlord II Ozymandias Paganitzu Pandemic: The Board Game Pankapu - Complete Edition Party Hard 2 Patch Quest Paw Paw Paw Peachleaf Pirates Persian Nights 2: The Moonlight Veil Pharaonic Pikuniku Police Stories POSTAL 2 Prodeus Pumped BMX Pro Punch Club Pure Farming 2018 Pushover Qora Quake II Rage in Peace Railroad Corporation Raji: An Ancient Epic Realms of Chaos Rebel Galaxy Regency Solitaire Rencounter Repella Fella RESTLESS SOUL Return to Castle Wolfenstein Reventure Revita REZ PLZ RICO: London Rising Hell Road to Ballhalla Roadwarden Rover Mechanic Simulator Rustler S.W.I.N.E. HD Remaster Saints Row Saints Row The Third Saints Row: Gat out of Hell Scheming Through The Zombie Apocalypse: The Beginning SCP: Secret Files SEARCH PARTY: Director's Cut SEUM: Speedrunners from Hell Shadowkin Shift Happens Shotgun King: The Final Checkmate Shuyan Saga Siege Survival: Gloria Victis Silence Silver Chains Sir Whoopass™: Immortal Death Sir, You Are Being Hunted Slain: Back from Hell Slaycation Paradise Snowtopia: Ski Resort Builder SONG OF HORROR COMPLETE EDITION Songbird Symphony Sorry, James Soulstice Soundfall Space Rangers HD: A War Apart Sparklite Spermination Spidersaurs Spirit of the Island Spirit of the North Spiritual Warfare & Wisdom Tree Collection Spooky Bonus Starpoint Gemini 2 Gold Pack Starpoint Gemini 3 Starpoint Gemini 3 - Supporter Pack STASIS State of Mind Storm Boy Strategic Mind: Blitzkrieg Strategic Mind: Fight for Freedom Strategic Mind: Spectre of Communism Strategic Mind: Spirit of Liberty Streets of Rogue Strider StrikeForce Kitty Strikey Sisters Stronghold Crusader 2 Stronghold Crusader HD Stygian: Reign of the Old Ones Styx: Master of Shadows Styx: Shards of Darkness SuchArt: Genius Artist Simulator Super Galaxy Squadron EX Turbo Super Magbot Super Star Path SUPERHOT Surgeon Simulator Survivalist Swag and Sorcery Syberia Synergia System Shock: Enhanced Edition Tails Noir [previously known as Backbone] Talisman - The City Expansion Talisman - The Frostmarch Expansion Talisman - The Sacred Pool Expansion Talisman: Digital Edition Teslagrad Remastered The Ascent The Dark Eye: Memoria The Deed II The Enchanted Cave 2 The Horror Of Salazar House The Indie Mixtape The Keep The Life and Suffering of Sir Brante The Mummy Demastered The Myth Seekers 2: The Sunken City The Oil Blue: Steam Legacy Edition The Ramp The Secret Order 7: Shadow Breach The Serpent Rogue The Sexy Brutale The Spectrum Retreat The Stillness of the Wind The Tarnishing of Juxtia The Textorcist: The Story of Ray Bibbia The Town of Light The Wild Eight There Is No Light: Enhanced Edition They Bleed Pixels This is the Zodiac Speaking This War of Mine Through the Woods Time Loader Time on Frog Island Tiny Tales: Heart of the Forest Toki Tools Up! Townsmen - A Kingdom Rebuilt Trifox TROUBLE JUICE Tunche Turbo Golf Racing Turnip Boy Commits Tax Evasion UNDETECTED Undungeon Unity of Command: Stalingrad Campaign Unloved Valfaris Vambrace: Cold Soul Velocity Ultra Viscerafest Wacky Wheels Wand Wars WARBORN Wargroove Warman Weaving Tides What Lies in the Multiverse When Ski Lifts Go Wrong Where the Water Tastes Like Wine Whispering Willows White Night White Noise 2 Who Pressed Mute on Uncle Marcus Windjammers 2 Windward Wolfenstein 3D Word Rescue Wordle Wordle 2 Wordle 3 Wordle 4 Wordle 5 XCOM 2 Youropa Ziggurat
 

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100% Orange Juice - Game of the Year Every Year Edition 7Days Origins 9 Years of Shadows A Plague Tale: Innocence Absolute Tactics - Deluxe Edition Aeterna Noctis Agatha Christie - Hercule Poirot: The First Cases Alchemist Adventure Alfred Hitchcock - Vertigo Aliens VS Predator Collection Aliens: Fireteam Elite Amnesia Collection Anime vs Evil: Apocalypse Arizona Sunshine - Deluxe Edition Astrea: Six-Sided Oracles Astronarch Axiom Verge Baba Is You Back 4 Blood Bug Fables: The Everlasting Sapling Bullet Girls Phantasia Call of Cthulhu Car Mechanic Simulator 2018 Cattails: Wildwood Story Children of Morta: Complete Edition Chivalry 2 Cookie Cutter Cornucopia Crime O'Clock Cultist Simulator: Anthology Edition Dead Estate Dead Island Definitive Edition DeadPoly Death's Gambit: Afterlife Descenders DEVOUR DIG - Deep In Galaxies Disco Elysium - The Final Cut Dishonored 2 Dr Livingstone, I Presume? Reversed Escape Room Dragon's Dogma: Dark Arisen ED-0: Zombie Uprising Elderand Escape The Backrooms Everdream Valley Fling to the Finish Frail Hearts: Versicorae Domlion Freedom Planet Frogun Frostpunk Gal*Gun: Double Peace Gearshifters Ghost Song Ghostrunner Ghostwire: Tokyo Gigapocalypse Gotham Knights Guardians of Holme Hacknet - Labyrinths How 2 Escape ICBM Ikonei Island: An Earthlock Adventure Immortal Life Iron Lung Just Cause 3 XXL Edition Katana ZERO Keeper's Toll Kerbal Space Program Kingdom Two Crowns Life is Strange: True Colors LISA: Complete Edition Littlewood Lords of the Fallen Game of the Year Edition LunarLux Magicka 2 Maglam Lord Mahokenshi - The Samurai Deckbuilder MARSUPILAMI - HOOBADVENTURE Metal Mutation Metal: Hellsinger Metro Exodus - Gold Edition MythForce No More Heroes No Place Like Home Oddworld: Soulstorm Enhanced Edition One More Dungeon 2 One True Hero Operation Flashpoint: Dragon Rising Operation: Tango Paper Planet Pets Hotel PGA TOUR 2K21 Pilfer: Story of Light Prey Red Line Rhythm Sprout: Sick Beats & Bad Sweets SG/ZH: School Girl/Zombie Hunter Shadow Complex Remastered Shadowrun: Dragonfall Director's Cut Siralim Ultimate Skeletal Avenger Sniper Ghost Warrior Contracts Space Quest Collection Spacebase Startopia - Extended Edition Spirit Hunter: Death Mark Spirit Hunter: NG Steelrising Streamer Life Simulator Super Buff HD Surgeon Simulator: Anniversary Edition TEKKEN 7 Tempest Complete Edition The Callisto Protocol The Dark Pictures Anthology: House of Ashes The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind® Game of the Year Edition The Knight Witch The Long Dark The Quarry The Surge 2 The Witch of Fern Island The Witness Tilt Brush Totally Accurate Battle Simulator Trail Out Trine 4: The Nightmare Prince Turok 2: Seeds of Evil Unpacking Valfaris: Mecha Therion Vampire Survivors Vanaris Tactics Vangers Victor Vran Victoria 3 Void Bastards WARTILE Water Margin - The Tale of Clouds and Wind Webbed Wizard of Legend Wolfenstein : The New Order Yakuza: Like a Dragon Youtubers Life

igs link
11-11 Memories Retold 12 is Better Than 6 A Juggler's Tale A Musical Story A Tale of Paper: Refolded ABZU Aces & Adventures Achtung! Cthulhu Tactics Ad Infinitum ADOM (Ancient Domains Of Mystery) Adventures of Chris AER Memories of Old Agatha Christie - The ABC Murders Ageless Aggelos Alex Kidd in Miracle World DX Amanda The Adventurer AMID EVIL Ancient Enemy Andro Dunos II Anomalous Apocalipsis Arcade Spirits Arto Arx Fatalis Asterix & Obelix XXL 2 Backfirewall_ Banners of Ruin Battle Axe Battlestar Galactica Deadlock Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Anabasis Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Armistice Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Ghost Fleet Offensive Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Modern Ships Pack Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Reinforcement Pack Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Resurrection Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: Sin and Sacrifice Battlestar Galactica Deadlock: The Broken Alliance Bear With Me - Collector's Edition BEAUTIFUL DESOLATION Beyond the Long Night Big Bang West Biped Black Skylands BLACKHOLE Blacksad: Under the Skin Blind Fate: Edo no Yami Block'Em! Blood And Zombies Bosorka Bot Vice Bots Are Stupid Bravery and Greed Breathedge Bridge Constructor: The Walking Dead Broken Edge Brunch Club Call of Juarez: Gunslinger Call of the Sea Car Mechanic Simulator 2014 Castle on the Coast Cavity Busters Chop Goblins Chroma Squad Citizen Sleeper Clustertruck Colt Canyon Cook, Serve, Delicious! Cook, Serve, Delicious! 3?! Coromon Creepy Tale Creepy Tale 2 Creepy Tale 3: Ingrid Penance Crumble Curse of the Dead Gods Cyber Hook Danger Scavenger Dark Deity Dead Age 2 Dead End Job Deadly Days Dear Esther: Landmark Edition Death Squared DEATHRUN TV Deceive Inc. Deep Sky Derelicts Demon Pit Demon Turf Desert Child DESOLATE Destroyer: The U-Boat Hunter Devil Spire Dice Legacy Disciples: Liberation DOOM (1993) DOOM 3 DOOM 64 DOOM II Double Double Cross Dragon Spirits Dread Templar Dreams in the Witch House Dreamscaper DUSK DUSK '82: ULTIMATE EDITION Dwarven Realms Edna & Harvey: The Breakout - Anniversary Edition Elven Legacy Collection Embr ENCODYA Ephemeral Tale Epic Chef Epistory - Typing Chronicles Eternal Edge + Eternal Threads Eventide 3: Legacy of Legends Evergarden Everhood Exiled Kingdoms Fallback Fallout 3 Fantasy Blacksmith Farm Frenzy: Refreshed First Class Trouble Five Dates Fobia - St. Dinfna Hotel Foretales FOREWARNED Founders' Fortune Frog Detective 1: The Haunted Island Frog Detective 2: The Case of the Invisible Wizard From Space Funtasia Game Dev Studio Ganryu 2 Garbage Garden Story Giana Sisters: Twisted Bundle God’s Trigger Going Under Golden Light Golf Gang Golf With Your Friends - OST Good Knight Grand Mountain Adventure: Wonderlands Grotto Growth Guild of Darksteel Gunlocked Gunlocked - The 2nd Gunning Guts and Glory Hands of Necromancy Hellbound Hello Neighbor Hide and Seek Hellslave Hellstuck: Rage With Your Friends Hero of the Kingdom: The Lost Tales 2 Hiveswap Friendsim HIVESWAP: ACT 1 Hocus Pocus Home Sweet Home Honey I Joined a Cult Hospital Tycoon Hot Brass Hover Hue Human: Fall Flat HUMANKIND Definitive Edition Hyposphere I Am Fish I am not a Monster Idol Hands Impulsion In Between In Other Waters In Sound Mind Inquisitor Deluxe Edition Interrogation: You will be deceived Iron Danger Ironcast Jack Move Jewel Match Solitaire Jewel Match Solitaire 2 Collector's Edition Jewel Match Solitaire L'Amour Jewel Match Solitaire Winterscapes Jewel Match Twilight Jewel Match Twilight Solitaire Joggernauts Juicy Realm Juno: New Origins [previously titled Simplerockets 2] Just Die Already JYDGE Kaichu - The Kaiju Dating Sim Karma City Police Ken Follett's The Pillars of the Earth King of Dragon Pass King of the Castle Kingdom: New Lands King's Bounty II Kitaria Fables Kraken Academy!! Lacuna Lamentum Landlord's Super Last Call BBS Latte Stand Tycoon + Lawn Mowing Simulator Letters - a written adventure Lichdom: Battlemage Light Fairytale Episode 1 Light Fairytale Episode 2 Lila’s Sky Ark Loddlenaut Looking for Aliens Looterkings Lords and Villeins Lost Castle Lost Words: Beyond the Page Ludus Lumberhill Machinika Museum Mad Experiments: Escape Room Mad Tracks Magenta Horizon MageQuit MagiCat Major Stryker Math Rescue May's Mysteries: The Secret of Dragonville Remastered Mech Mechanic Simulator Mediterranea Inferno Meeple Station Mega Man Legacy Collection Men of War: Assault Squad - Game of the Year Edition Metro 2033 Redux Metro: Last Light Redux Milky Way Prince – The Vampire Star Mind Scanners Mini Thief Monorail Stories Monster Slayers Monster Slayers - Advanced Classes Unlocker Monster Slayers - Fire and Steel Expansion Morbid: The Seven Acolytes Mortal Shell Mr. Prepper My Lovely Wife Mystic Towers Mythic Ocean Nebuchadnezzar Neverinth NEXT JUMP: Shmup Tactics Nigate Tale Nihilumbra Nine Witches: Family Disruption Nippon Marathon Noir Chronicles: City of Crime Northmark: Hour of the Wolf Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee Omen Exitio: Plague One More Line Orbital Bullet Orwell: Keeping an Eye On You Osteoblasts OTTTD Out of Space OUT OF THE BOX Outliver: Tribulation Overloop Overlord II Ozymandias Paganitzu Pandemic: The Board Game Pankapu - Complete Edition Party Hard 2 Patch Quest Paw Paw Paw Peachleaf Pirates Persian Nights 2: The Moonlight Veil Pharaonic Pikuniku Police Stories POSTAL 2 Pumped BMX Pro Punch Club Pure Farming 2018 Pushover Qora Quake II Rage in Peace Railroad Corporation Raji: An Ancient Epic Realms of Chaos Rebel Galaxy Regency Solitaire Rencounter Repella Fella RESTLESS SOUL Return to Castle Wolfenstein Reventure Revita REZ PLZ RICO: London Rising Hell Road to Ballhalla Roadwarden Rover Mechanic Simulator Rustler S.W.I.N.E. 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Higher Value Games

100% Orange Juice - Game of the Year Every Year Edition 7Days Origins 9 Years of Shadows A Plague Tale: Innocence Absolute Tactics - Deluxe Edition Aeterna Noctis Agatha Christie - Hercule Poirot: The First Cases Alchemist Adventure Alfred Hitchcock - Vertigo Aliens VS Predator Collection Aliens: Fireteam Elite Amnesia Collection Anime vs Evil: Apocalypse Arizona Sunshine - Deluxe Edition Astrea: Six-Sided Oracles Astronarch Axiom Verge Baba Is You Back 4 Blood Bug Fables: The Everlasting Sapling Bullet Girls Phantasia Call of Cthulhu Car Mechanic Simulator 2018 Cattails: Wildwood Story Children of Morta: Complete Edition Chivalry 2 Cookie Cutter Cornucopia Crime O'Clock Cultist Simulator: Anthology Edition Dead Estate Dead Island Definitive Edition DeadPoly Death's Gambit: Afterlife Descenders DEVOUR DIG - Deep In Galaxies Disco Elysium - The Final Cut Dishonored 2 Dr Livingstone, I Presume? Reversed Escape Room Dragon's Dogma: Dark Arisen ED-0: Zombie Uprising Elderand Escape The Backrooms Everdream Valley Fling to the Finish Frail Hearts: Versicorae Domlion Freedom Planet Frogun Frostpunk Gal*Gun: Double Peace Gearshifters Ghost Song Ghostrunner Ghostwire: Tokyo Gigapocalypse Gotham Knights Guardians of Holme Hacknet - Labyrinths How 2 Escape ICBM Ikonei Island: An Earthlock Adventure Immortal Life Iron Lung Just Cause 3 XXL Edition Katana ZERO Keeper's Toll Kerbal Space Program Kingdom Two Crowns Life is Strange: True Colors LISA: Complete Edition Littlewood Lords of the Fallen Game of the Year Edition LunarLux Magicka 2 Maglam Lord Mahokenshi - The Samurai Deckbuilder MARSUPILAMI - HOOBADVENTURE Metal Mutation Metal: Hellsinger Metro Exodus - Gold Edition MythForce No More Heroes No Place Like Home Oddworld: Soulstorm Enhanced Edition One More Dungeon 2 One True Hero Operation Flashpoint: Dragon Rising Operation: Tango Paper Planet Pets Hotel PGA TOUR 2K21 Pilfer: Story of Light Prey Red Line Rhythm Sprout: Sick Beats & Bad Sweets SG/ZH: School Girl/Zombie Hunter Shadow Complex Remastered Shadowrun: Dragonfall Director's Cut Siralim Ultimate Skeletal Avenger Sniper Ghost Warrior Contracts Space Quest Collection Spacebase Startopia - Extended Edition Spirit Hunter: Death Mark Spirit Hunter: NG Steelrising Streamer Life Simulator Super Buff HD Surgeon Simulator: Anniversary Edition TEKKEN 7 Tempest Complete Edition The Callisto Protocol The Dark Pictures Anthology: House of Ashes The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind® Game of the Year Edition The Knight Witch The Long Dark The Quarry The Surge 2 The Witch of Fern Island The Witness Tilt Brush Totally Accurate Battle Simulator Trail Out Trine 4: The Nightmare Prince Turok 2: Seeds of Evil Unpacking Valfaris: Mecha Therion Vampire Survivors Vanaris Tactics Vangers Victor Vran Victoria 3 Void Bastards WARTILE Water Margin - The Tale of Clouds and Wind Webbed Wizard of Legend Wolfenstein : The New Order Yakuza: Like a Dragon Youtubers Life

I’m not a stranger to the single player campaigns in Real-Time Strategy (RTS) games, even when it’s a genre I’m not really any good at. In the early 2000s, I’ve played all the Age of Empires games, Age of Mythology, Rise of Nations, Stronghold 1 and, more relevant to this review, Warcraft 3 and its expansion. A decade later and inspired by the announcements of the, then upcoming, Warcraft Movie, I played the campaigns of Warcraft 1 & 2 and, right after, the original Starcraft (SC1) and Brood War. This was at some point in 2014. Of these older Blizzard games, I liked SC1 the most, even when I only remember some simple things from it: the zerg were my favorite species to play with, Sarah Kerrigan (the Queen of Blades) was a good tragic character, Zeratul was a cool name and Arcturus Mengsk was a bastard that didn’t have his comeuppance in neither the base game or Brood War.
And here we are, in 2024, and I’m finally playing the complete Starcraft 2 (SC2) trilogy. For the first-timers, SC2 is a space-opera RTS with 3 big species colliding in conflict: the Terrans (space humans), the Zerg (the bad aliens, dominated by an “overmind” telepathically, with this leader being, due to the events of SC1, Sarah Kerrigan) and the Protoss (the honorable good aliens, that are also connected to each other with their minds, but nobody dominates anyone in particular). What better way to begin our journey than to spread our…

Wings of Liberty (WoL) - 2010 -

The starting campaign is all about the Terrans (humans), putting you in the role of Jim Raynor, a survivor from the first game. First thing I noticed was that the graphics showed their age a little bit, with the worst part being the heavily-compressed CGI cutscenes. Over the years, I’ve seen other people play this game and it always looked incredible, even as late as in 2018. Well, it didn’t look incredible anymore but the graphics were just fine. The good thing is that the art style was strong enough to make the less-than-ideal textures and animations still shine. Also, the production values were excellent all around.
Anyway, as soon as I got used to the graphics, I discovered a big positive aspect of SC2. I quickly fell in love with the new ship hub between missions. Instead of a decorated simple menu (like Age of Empires or Stronghold), you were presented with different rooms inside a spaceship, and you could talk to characters, spend money to upgrade your army and see a small in-engine cutscene or two before the next objective. This hub is where the majority of the storytelling happened and I’d love to see more RTS do something like this.
The campaign was an excellent tutorial for newbies (like me!), as every mission was focused on a single new playable unit at a time, and they kept adding more and more of these units in future missions, until you were using most of them seamlessly by the endgame.
I started playing with the “Normal” difficulty but soon settled with “Casual” because the game wouldn’t…

Stop rushing me

I found out that what seemed like a substantial portion of the missions put you on a timer, one way or another. Either you had something that was going to explode or the enemy’s faction was destroying an important installation or you had to hold on until reinforcements arrived. More often than not, the game would pressure you to finish the mission as soon as possible and I didn’t like that. My favorite missions in RTS are always the ones without a time limit, where maybe there are never-ending hordes of enemies coming at you at regular intervals but if you survive, you can get stronger for as long as you want and you are the one to decide when it’s time to attack a particular fortress and move on. Well, in all fairness, SC2 had some missions like that but it usually defaulted to rushing you. And I like to play at a relaxed pace and the great thing here, for a noob like me, is that I was able to complete the totality of SC2 without cheats because the “Casual” difficulty allowed me to win every level with ease, even with the aforementioned time limit.
Most missions usually were just about 20 to 30 minutes long, so moving through the campaign was a very breezy affair once you’ve adjusted the difficulty to your liking.
What about the story in WoL? Well, first, I had to open up wikis every time a character other than Mengks, Kerrigan, Raynor or Zeratul came to the screen because I couldn’t remember any of them from SC1, let alone all the particular factions besides the big species. Second, the overall plot was a touch weird: the story started with Raynor plotting his revenge against Emperor Mengsk, the big bad from SC1, and somewhere towards the middle, the story turned into a quest to de-zerg our favorite Queen of Blades. By the end of this game, Raynor felt no closer to beat Mengsk but now his human-again “darling” Sarah Kerrigan was back. I don’t know about you guys, but the whole story was a bit meandering, with many supporting characters that didn’t amount to much in the long run. It all started as a human campaign against the evil emperor and it soon turned into a Zerg matter, which all lead us to the real…

Heart of the Swarm (HotS) - 2013 -

The Queen of Blades doesn’t spend too much time being human before she returns to her usual Zerg form again. Now, that’s a very flexible body that can withstand anything.
This time around, we controlled the Zerg, from the point of view of Sarah Kerrigan. This campaign was, just like in SC1, my favorite in terms of gameplay. There’s something about the Zerg that appeals to my lame RTS skills. The strategy of overwhelming the enemy with way more units that they can handle always works best with the Zerg, the species you can count on to throw a gazillion disposable minions at your enemies.
Also, Blizzard decided to improve the way you unlock upgrades to your armies. Now you can choose perks or special units and change them anytime you are in your returning hub area, instead of spending limited money that you’d never get back, like in WoL. I found myself experimenting a lot more with the multiple units and trying most options thanks to the new easier way to upgrade. And I thought the graphics improved a little bit, which was something nice to see.
This campaign had more solo missions, when you were just controlling Kerrigan or a bunch of hero units, without any base building. These were always fun to do and you could relax and focus on the voices and grand speeches.
And speaking of voices, starting with this campaign we got a lot more of what I wanted to see from day one with SC2: characters with excellent post-processed voices with cool one-liners and badass postures. Everyone had an interesting sound here, from Abathur, moving through the Queen of Blade’s assistant Izsha with her bedroom eyes and other allies like Zagarah, the reluctant brood mother, or some surprising returning characters from SC1. The terrans in WoL were too human, too “normal”, even when some of them had cool voices. I wanted to hear unrealistic deep and alien sounds, instead, and HotS delivered that in spades. For other examples of games with voice acting like this, I always think about the Darksiders series and this particular trailer for World of Warcraft.
I wouldn’t say HotS was a better story than WoL but it was certainly more entertaining to me. There was a good amount of dubious stuff that you had to ignore to keep enjoying the premise, like when they found the original “primal” Zerg, and these beings called themselves “primal Zerg”. This is like the Aztecs and Mayas calling themselves “indians” or “native americans”. It doesn’t work like that. And something else that doesn’t quite work that I realized while reading wikis… wasn’t Sarah Kerrigan sort of a bad guy at the end of SC1? I think that these new games rewrote the way the protagonists see her and she’s very easily redeemed in the eyes of Jim Raynor and the rest. Hell, Raynor ended SC1 saying he’d be the one to kill her and now she was his “darling” again? And to keep up with this redemption arc, the Queen of Blades is the one to finally put an end to Mengsk’s life, in a bit of poetic justice.
And of course, there was a new big bad called Amon, that is barely present here, but hey, it’s a good excuse to make Kerrigan not only a full Zerg again, but also evolve with the powers of the Primal Zerg. She had to be ready for whatever was going to happen in…

Legacy of the Void (LotV) - 2015 -

Probably the best campaign, even when playing as Protross wasn’t as exciting for me as playing with Zergs (poor terrans were always a distant third). Blizzard kept all the improvements of HotS in terms of visual and gameplay upgrades and we still had these excellent ship hubs to talk to everyone relevant to the campaign. And the voices here were top-notch! There were lots and lots of fantastic post-processed voice acting, including a character voiced by no other than John de Lancie of Q’s fame (Star Trek: The Next Generation).
I think they reached the best balance between missions where you played with heroes, missions that rushed you and missions that allowed you to play for as long as you want. Also, you’d get to play as Terrans and Zergs in the finale, too! A terrific way to close this trilogy and the franchise, as a whole.
Now, the story itself veered too much into the fantasy realm, particularly by the final levels. Suddenly, this Amon being was an unstoppable force of nature by itself, so you didn’t need political intrigue anymore. Every faction had to unite against him or die and then, the only way to really defeat Amon was for Sarah Kerrigan to evolve once more (this time into a Xel’Naga) and fight against him.
I enjoyed the whole journey, but the Queen of Blades turning super Saiyan/a golden angel to save the day felt a lot more like something that’d happen in Warcraft than this particular sci-fi universe. Knowing the full story now, I’d say (from what I remember) SC1 and Brood War were more about politics and the big picture and more sci-fi in detriment of the characters and SC2 was much more character-driven and with a story that leaves its own genre behind, by the end (prophecies, eldritch beings that defied the whole galaxy, Sarah Kerrigan becoming a sort of goddess). I’d say SC1 was more serious and believable but it left me feeling a bit cold, a decade ago, and this game, on one hand, was much sillier and with a heavy dose of fantasy in the depiction of the main events but, on the other hand, it felt more personal and warmer. I see myself replaying SC2 in a few years from now, just for the crazy adventure.
TL;DR: All in all, the SC2 trilogy was very entertaining and if you never played it before don’t hesitate to give it a try. It’s very welcoming for newcomers of the RTS genre, the story is bananas but it’s never boring, the production values are really strong, even when 14, 11 and 8 years had passed since the release date of each episode. I’m really glad I could finally complete this part of gaming history. And now, it’s your turn.

Before purchasing the Season Pass, I had only gone to the Alamo once to see The Marvels. I'd had a great experience (mainly with the seats, food, and alcohol lol), but I never really thought about going back unless there was another movie I truly wanted to see. However, approximately one month ago, one of the students in my capstone group mentioned that he had the Season Pass, and I made the impulse decision to also purchase it. I figured that, since it is my last semester of college, Alamo is so close by (St. Louis location, and I attend SLU, so like a 5 minute walk), and I love watching movies (I've seen close to 600 at 22), it was something that I would really enjoy doing. Now, I'm going to do a breakdown of my experience over the past month.
So far, I have seen 24 movies total, and in order, they were: Sasquatch Sunset, Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire, Big Lebowski, Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare (Big Show), Challengers (Early Access), Hard Target, Monkey Man, Abigail, Alien 45th Anniversary, Humane, Civil War, Fall Guy (Early Access), Tarot, Star Wars: Phantom Menace 25th Anniversary, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, Casino, Bridesmaids, The Amazing Spider-Man, Serial Mom, Mamma Mia, Hot Fuzz, Scarface, Psycho, and Last Stop in Yuma County. I am about to see another one tonight (If), I may see one tomorrow right before my pass expires, and I purchased one ticket just to get the rewards. I would have seen more movies if I could, but the nights I didn't go were either repeat movies, or my Alamo was closed (which I would assume is due to lack of staffing that day?).
In regards to food/drink, I've had the Regular Popcorn, Churro Popcorn, Cookie Milkshake, Salted Caramel Milkshake, Burger, Carnivore Pizza, Chocolate Chip Cookies, and Loaded Fries. Their milkshakes are some of the best I've ever had (the cookie one is my favorite), and the rest of the food is pretty good (although pricey when I did purchase it). The Churro Popcorn, Chocolate Chip Cookies, Loaded Fries, and a random Dr. Pepper were free with the rewards I have built up. I also have another appetizer reward that I will use tonight (trying to decide between the Pretzel, Mozzarella Sticks, and Chips + Queso).
Now, to the general good things about my experience. Although most movie theaters are like this nowadays, I love how comfortable the seats are. The theaters were usually very quiet and undisturbed (I saw the post about the same STL location having issues, but I never experienced that). I enjoyed the wide selection of movies (I saw a lot of older ones, as you can probably see). I also liked being able to have early access to a few of the movies I saw, as it felt like a random perk of my Season Pass (even though you didn't need one for it). The servers were usually very attentive and pleasant to talk to, even if I only asked for a water, and I rarely needed to press the button to get their attention. The food would also come out pretty quickly after I ordered, and being able to move the tray table in front of me was a big plus in that regard. There was even one day that I was completely alone in the theater (Monkey Man), which was a cool experience for me.
There were also some downsides. On the days that they were understaffed, ordering was definitely harder, especially for the Big Shows (I mostly noticed this when I saw Fall Guy and got the pizza + drink). Then, for one of the movies (Monkey Man, again), the server took my card in case I ordered anything (they've never done this before, and it hasn't happened since then), and I got charged a $1 fee that was never refunded. Another time, when I went with some friends, we were stuck in the rain and wanted to order some drinks, but I guess they close the bar up before the theater closes, so we couldn't get anything, which kind of sucked. Finally, while this is something that Alamo has no control of whatsoever, I wish I would have met more people with how often I went. I'm a single man, and was hoping to maybe meet a single woman at some point, but I know that likely wouldn't have happened. (Note: these were very minimal downsides, and the good things completely outweighed the bad.)
I will now give the statistics in regards to my experience. I purchased 26 tickets in total: 23 regular movies, and 3 Big Shows. After adding up the cost of the Season Pass, the convenience fees, purchases of tickets for friends/family (with some taken off for them paying me back in one form or another), and the couple of times I purchased food, it comes out to about $126.09. To determine how much I saved, I looked at how much a ticket would cost normally ($16.63 for a regular show, $22.77 for a Big Show), and the cost of each individual reward I had received. If I did not have the Season Pass or the rewards, my total cost would have been about $526.89, which is about $400 and 76% in savings. In my opinion, that is a great deal for how many movies I saw.
Overall, I would say that I highly recommend getting the Season Pass, especially if you live within walking distance of the theater. I did purchase my Season Pass at a somewhat bad time, as I spent less time studying for finals or hanging out with friends before I graduate, but when I did have a lot of free time, this was a good way for me to pass the time. I hope to live closer to an Alamo in the future, as this was a great experience for me.

64F/HW239/SW217/CW203. I can’t help but think that the processed and fast food industries are going to hate these drugs long term. It will be a few years, however, these drugs will get better and insurance companies will eventually cover for weight loss because it will save them money in the long run. Once that happens, it’s game on. Many, many folks will be on these drugs. It’s early on with the new scripts strictly for weight loss so I expect that to grow exponentially. I have always been a fast food junky. McDonald’s #2 large was my go to when I was out and about. Pulling up to the drive through and getting a hit of salt, fat and processed everything was exactly what my brain told me I needed to be satiated. Now I drive by and wave remembering how these industries have destroyed health in today’s world. I’ve been around a while and have watched that food pyramid change drastically due to bad data in the form of peer reviewed studies that told us carbohydrates such as pasta and bread were good for us and fat was the enemy. I can’t tell you how many fat free cookies I ate in the 90s when we were told fat was the culprit. Do they even make them anymore? I now crave healthier foods for the first time in many, many years. I will choose a salad with a protein over Mac and cheese. Wow, that’s something completely different occurring in my brain. I had no idea how powerful the relationship is between my gut and my brain. I’ve been taking Zep for 6 weeks now. My husband worries I’m not eating enough. I am eating 1200 calories, but that just shows how much I was overeating, constantly chasing satiety but never really finding it. I also feel better than I have felt it 10 years.

To start, I am so incredibly proud of myself for getting as far as I have! I’m on week 9 and have lost just shy of 30 pounds! That being said, the medicine was an aid to this but my lifestyle changes and decisions have helped me get to where I am today.
I did 1 month of 2.5mg and took my 5th 5mg shot on Saturday. However, I’m feeling a little discouraged. Last week I didn’t notice a return of food noise, but I definitely started to pay attention to foods that I cannot/shouldn’t have. Last week, I started craving pasta again and ate it 3 times in a week. I’ll look at the cookies and want just one mint milano, which I’ll eat half of, feel guilty and toss it. A client gave me homemade chocolate covered pretzels and I had to give them away because I’d have a couple here and there. This is why these foods cannot be in/around my house, but the problem is I bought or accepted them!
I’ve exclusively been a stomach injector and haven’t tried a new spot… YET. My scale has been flip flopping between the same 2 pounds for the last 2 weeks. I’m noticing that I’m a lot hungrier than usual, but mentally I’m so strong and I know I can do this. I’m trying to stay on 5mg at least until my next box is gone because I have 7 pens left and can’t bring myself to waste the OOP expense.
I’m going to try a new spot on Saturday, but I need to get over this mental hurdle that pasta isn’t bad, half a cookie isn’t bad, because moderation is key. But also, I’m praying I’m not too accustomed to this dose, because finding 7.5mg will be a journey but sticking with 5mg may be a journey of its own.
I’m just having a rough day and need to know I’m not alone here. I know the recovery of food issues is probably therapy territory, but I wish eating one chocolate covered pretzel wouldn’t ruin my day.

Oh my god…HEEEELP MEEEEE
I ate 4 cookies, JUST 4 after a meal of chicken caldo. “A few cookies couldn’t hurt” I says. “After all I deserve a reward for being so disciplined” i says
NEVER AGAIN, I am in PAAAAAIN.
It really makes me realize how lucky I am, I used to polish off entire boxes of store bought chocolate chip cookies, eat half of an entire cake solo. With no real intestinal consequences (or so I thought) I am just now realizing how badly I’ve been mistreating my body..and I’m glad I was able to make a change before it was too late.
Pray for me and my toilet 😭🙏

I mean, I guess it’s not a bad thing overall, but most days the thought of eating a cookie or doughnut makes me extremely nauseous. Prior to Covid those things brought me so much joy. Could use a little joy these days. Just bizarre. Anyone else?

DISCLAIMER: I did not transcribe this myself, though I could. I had a machine do it, and then the machine threw up afterwards -- but I did go through and add some bullety points while Jamie shot off her mouth. It's a total word salad, but one has only to skim through and see the number of ways she yawns and yawps and contradicts herself ... and does not take a breath, so there is very little punctuation. Again it's a run-on slog and the AI program chose to only use periods to end 70-some sentences because of all the run-on "like ... you know ... and ... but" instances as she ran with it -- with NO BOUNDARIES WHATSOVER. I did take out the kids' names, and I did search-and-replace all instances of "to" with "tuh" because that IS how they talk!
ENJOY -- and I use that word lightly:
AND SO IT BEGINS WITH Doug wishing Happy Mother's Day … and immediately Jamie corrects him, "Well, not really Mother's Day …" since they are recording after Mother's Day. Got get those Doug corrections in toot sweet, lest he thinks he has a mind of his own.
They note they tend to be "a little late on things," but they are "trying to get better about that." Doug says they had a fantastic Mother's Day, and he asked her if she had a good time. She said she had a great time. Doug wrote Happy Mother's Day on some cards and the kids drew on them. He gave her an eyelash waxing and noted probably a bad idea. She said it wasn't that she wasn't thrilled as she did mention that pregnancy makes her eyebrows bushy, but she was scared, maybe just mentioned she'd need to tweeze, but oh, well, yes, she likes his gift.
Jamie noted that it was "just the four of us" and of course, the babies in her belly, and that was fine with her – until her son's birthday of course, when she noted that their entire families suck!
So onto her son's birthdays and THESE GEMS AND THOUGHTS: I think it's just pregnancy hormones, but honestly, like, I just, I just can't, like, I don't know why, like, I guess, like, you know, ever since I was little, I've always really, really wanted family, like, so badly, like, I wanted just, like, deep connections with people who truly love me, and I truly love them, and we just really, truly support each other, and just, I don't know, I think, like, just pregnancy hormones made me think about it, but, like, yesterday for Son's birthday, and just family members who just completely forgot, and they just don't care, and I'm like, is it me? Is it him?
Like, and I don't want my son tuh grow, like, he doesn't know, and he'll never know, because I'll make sure, I mean, I spent every second, that boy had no second tuh think yesterday, like, I picked him up from school, and I took him tuh the library, because that's where he wanted tuh go, and then we, like, you know, we really love surprises in this family, if that's not clear by now, and so Daughter and I surprised him with a splash pad, like, we went tuh the splash pad for the first time, and we never do things like that on a school night, and so, and then he got tuh go pick out a cake that he wanted, and then Doug had dinner already at home, and then also we had decorations in his bedroom, which I was, like, hoping tuh have for the morning, but then Doug was, like, at, like, midnight, when we're, like, thinking about starting tuh blow up the balloons, Doug is like, Jamie, let's just surprise him tomorrow after school.

(Notice she takes no breath … and also they were super-last minute when it came tuh getting ready for his birthday, versus, what we have all mentioned, that isn't so when it's a gender reveal or a party or pickleball or something FOR HER.)
HERE, DOUG ASKS … "WHY, ARE WE GONNA DO THIS NOW?" AND THIS WAS PRETTY MUCH THE LAST EFFORT HE MADE tuh STOP HER BECAUSE SHE WENT ON WITH: Yeah, because it was so late, but I was like, I just have, like, this vision that I just wanted for him, because, you know, I'm just trying tuh give them the childhood that, like, I would have wanted, that any little kid would want, and really all that involves is truly just two loving parents who are there, and, like, that's really all that really involves, but if I can go a little extra, you know, and surprise him, and I, then I want to, you know, and so, you know.
DOUG NOTES THAT HE DOESN'T THINK THEY KNOW ANY DIFFERENT, AND HE CONTINUES WITH: I don't think they really know any different, you know, and I know, I know it's, it's tough, and I think, especially with, like, little kids, you know, they, they won't necessarily feel the impact and that want, you know, and, and I know that you do, and it, it hurts me that, you know, you would, you would want people tuh care enough to, tuh reach out, and I think, you know, for, for me, I, that's, I don't really set my expectations or, or give those expectations tuh son and daughter.
JAMIE BLASTS BACK, SUPER-DEFENSIVELY: Oh, I do not either, though. I do not at all. I don't say a thing tuh them about anything, because, you know, sometimes people miss their – you know, and that happens sometimes, but when it's, like, over, and over, and over again, and, like, it's just so obvious, and, and people ask us why we moved tuh Florida, and don't we want tuh be near family, and, you know, tuh be very honest, this is why.
Like, we, you know, I, we would fly up there tuh try tuh prove, like, hey, listen, we're not just trying tuh leave, though. Like, we, we, I want that family connection so badly with your family, with my family, and it's just, you know, unfortunately, it's, people are in different stages of life. I try tuh make excuses, like, for them, and, you know, for us, and it's probably not personal, but the point of the matter is, is that whether it's not personal, and people are busy, and whatever the case may be, we don't have that family connection.
We just don't, and I'm, I try tuh nurture it, and, um, you know, and we do with some family members, and then just others, you know, you just, it's just. Well, you can't help but be disappointed. Yeah, and, like, I guess my heart hurts, because I want our son, and our daughter, and our children tuh have just so many people who love them, and want tuh be around them, and who will encourage them, and support them, and.
DOUG NOTES THAT HE THINKS FAMILY KNOW ALL OF THIS AND THAT THEY, THE KIDS KNOW HOW MUCH LOVE THEY HAVE FOR THEM, AND ALL THE EFFORTS THEY PUT FORTH, AND HERE HE SAYS, "Especially you," AND THAT ALL OF THIS IS WHAT MATTERS MOST.
JAMIE'S REBUTTAL: Yeah, I know, but Doug, what I'm trying tuh say is that, like, what I would want for them is them tuh have many people who love them, and, like, you know, like, I always wanted, you know, it's not even a secret, like, way back, I'm married at first, like, the one thing I wanted was tuh marry into a family, like, a big loving family that would welcome me as their own, and, and I'm really thankful for your family, and, yeah, but, like, I just feel like, like, I want that for our kids. Like, I wanted them tuh have people who loved them, who wanted tuh come around them.
Like, my, my siblings and I really didn't have many aunts or uncles or grandparents who, I mean, you know, it's kind of, it's so long, because, like, there are some people who were there, but it was, like, toxic, and aye, aye, aye, it's just, you know, it's just, at the end of the day, I'm pregnant, and it's just hormones, and I know our kids feel nothing but loved, but it's just really evident, like, on a birthday or holidays, like, people who, who actually, like, family who actually truly cares for us, and, like, all I've ever wanted was just our, like, I, I don't know why I care about these people caring about me, when, like, they don't care, and it's okay, and that's, that's, it's okay.
Like, it, I'm trying so hard tuh just be, like, accept it, girl. Like, you know, you can't force family tuh love you.
JAMIE TRIES TO DIFFUSE THE TIMEBOMB SITUATION THAT IS HIS WIFE, CLEARLY GOING OFF ON EVERYBODY BY SAYING HE KNOWS THAT SHE DOESN'T WANT THIS FOR THEM BUT THAT THEY, THE KIDS, DON'T EVEN NOW ABOUT ALL OF THIS RIGHT NOW.
JAMIE'S REBUTTAL: Well, I know they don't, and so, at the end of the day, I was, like, sitting in bed crying earlier, and I was, like, what is wrong with me, because I know my son had a great birthday yesterday. Like, I made sure of it.
DOUG NOTES SHE "KILLED IT, YESTERDAY."
JAMIE BLASTS ON: At the end of the day, I think, like, it's a personal thing, because it's, like, they don't care about me, and therefore, they don't care about my son, and that hurts, you know? Like, it's just hurtful, and not, because I care about them, and I love them, and I've tried so hard tuh be part of them, and, and try to, like, I've tried changing my ways. I've tried tuh adapt tuh be more like them.
I've tried all these different things. At the end of the day, nothing I do, like, I may as well just be myself, and, and, because if I have tried tuh be like them, they don't like me. If I try tuh be myself, they don't like me.
Like, no matter what, like, I don't feel like, I feel like they're, I'm just kind of judged by them in the way that I live my life, and anyways, it's fine, but.
DOUG COUNTERS IT WITH THE FACT THAT JAMIE GOES "ABOVE AND BEYOND FOR EVERYBODY," AND THAT IT'S TOUGH THAT SHE "WANTS OR EXPECTS THAT IN RETURN," BUT NOTES THAT THIS IS ALSO MAYBE WHERE THE "BOUNDARIES" LIE … cool, they now have a title for the podcast!
JAMIE CONTINUES tuh BLAST: Well, no, of course, and this is exactly why I'm also crying happy tears, because for so long, I just really tried tuh nurture, like, a true, like, true family, and deep connection, and like, try tuh be, like, really close, and, and it's like, well, if you're the only person nurturing that, you're bound tuh get hurt. It's bound, it's not going tuh happen ever, because it has tuh be a two-way street, and so, unfortunately, like, I started putting up boundaries, and I knew it was going tuh hurt, and like, here it is. It's, it's hurting, you know, like, and then inevitably, they'll be like, you know, you moved tuh Florida, but even when we didn't live in Florida, let's be honest, like, we didn't see family very often, unless, like, it was, it just, unless it was us going places, and then even when we moved here, I would fly up there.
I flew up, we were flying up there, like, once a month. It was so expensive. It was so taxing, but I just wanted to, tuh kind of prove, hey, listen, like, but, you know, I'm so glad we moved here, because at the end of the day, you know, even if we never even find our own people, like, our focus is on our core family, like, we had zero distractions for Son yesterday, like, his birthday was the hundred, like, and it's just, that feels good, because normally, we wouldn't have that. Yeah, normally, I would be cleaning the house, trying tuh prep for people tuh come over, who I would have called 10 times, make sure they remember that he's coming, and it's like, or that his birthday is coming, and it's like, it's just, you know, this is such a vulnerable, I don't even know if I want tuh share any of this, because it's just so personal, but.
DOUG NOTES THAT ALL REFLECTS MORE ABOUT OTHERS AND NOT AN ATTACK ON JAMIE.
AND YET JAMIE CONTINUES TO DEFLECT AND ATTACK: No, I don't think it is either, but it's just very evident where people, like, if people care about us and our family, I don't think they actually, that's the thing, is they don't, like, and so, they're not thinking about it one way or the other, it doesn't even matter tuh them, and that's what hurts, because I wish that they cared about us the way that we cared about them, but they don't, and so, that's why I'm trying tuh have the boundaries tuh be like, find people who will care about you then, or just focus on your own family, and if people wonder why I want so many kids, well, there you go. People constantly say, why don't you love the two you have?
Oh, of course I do, and I'll tell you what, I want tuh have 10 more, because I want tuh raise them in a way where we love each other, we're always there for each other, we don't forget. It's just silly little milestones, it's not about presents, it's not about anything other than just love, and remembrance, and just, like, celebrating each other, and I am going tuh raise my kids tuh just really love each other, and tuh know that their parents love them, but God forbid, one of us are taken, and then, then it's like, I think about things like that, and I'm like, who do they have if they don't have us? Like, seriously, and that scares the crap out of me, because there are very few people who even remember, like, and tuh me, it's just a birthday, I know, it doesn't really matter, but like, that's of significance tuh that child, and people just don't care, like, they just, our fam, so many of our family members just don't care. Well, we make, we make it, and then I'm like, am I making a mountain out of a molehill, but like, and am I?
DOUG ALSO THINKS ABOUT THEM "DEPARTING EARLY" AND WHAT HAPPENS tuh THEM.
JAMIE BUSTS BACK IN, AND STARTS tuh TALK ABOUT "ESTATE PLANNING," WHICH SORT OF MADE ME SIDEYE BECAUSE SHE GOES ON tuh TALK ABOUT THE KIDS AND WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO THEM, AS IF THEY WERE PART OF THE "ESTATE," BUT I GUESS SINCE THEY ARE THE MONEYMAKERS SHE THINKS OF IT MORE IN THAT WAY THAN GUARDIANSHIP PAPERWORK … AND SO SHE CONTINUES: Well, when you think about estate planning, and then who you're leaving your kids to, and I'm like, who can I leave my kids to, who are really going tuh love them, and the people right now didn't even call tuh wish him happy birthday, they didn't even call tuh wish him a happy birthday, they didn't send a gift, and it's not even about the gift, but it's about the thought, who do we have in our life, Doug? I don't think it's, you know, I ask if I think I'm making a mountain out of a molehill, but then I, like, I almost, like, talk, like, convince myself that, no, I'm not, like, I'm really trying tuh make sure that our kids are taken, like, loved and taken care of, and sure, we've got it out, down pat, but what happens, like, then what?
And like, I'm not gonna go down that rabbit hole, and I'm sure this is all pregnancy hormones, and I'm just exhausted and tired, so, but I just think about these things, and then, and then people wonder why I am so thankful for our followers, for those of you listening tuh the podcast, and those of you who follow us on Instagram and YouTube, and who are just excited for us, because a lot of our own family members aren't, like, it's just wild, and so, yeah, and so thank you for those of you listening, and for those of you who comment, and just, you know, just are excited to, like, like, tuh be part of our family, like, because we have forever been looking for that, and, like, our family's just not that interested, and we could try, and try, and try.
DOUG: Out of sight, out of mind.
JAMIE BINGOS!!!!! THAT THOUGHT AND CONTINUES: Yeah, it's, and it's fine, but I'll tell you what, I genuinely do appreciate every single five-star review, every single, like, nudge that you just, every single moment that you take out of your life just tuh be like, hey, what's up with Jamie, you know, and that's why I try tuh do giveaways, and I try to, you know, like, read your five-star reviews, and I try tuh show you that I genuinely care about you, too, because I really think that it is a two-way street with everything in life, like, so whether it's, you know, family, it's friends, it's working, it's, we're colleagues, like, if someone is showing you a lot of, you know, any support, or encouragement, or care, like, then that's the person that you should then go show love, support, and encouragement, and care to, whether they're family or not, and unfortunately, if family doesn't seem tuh show you that, well, then you do have tuh set up boundaries, and it hurts, like, h-e-l-l, because then you'll start to, when you stop reaching out as much, well, then you'll start seeing that your relationship becomes even more distant, but you can't constantly break your back tuh try tuh make relationships.
DOUG NOTES THAT THEY EITHER STEP UP OR DON'T, AND THAT’S WHERE IT LANDS.
JAMIE CONTINUES: Yeah, but from what, from my experience, from what we've experienced, you know, no one really steps up, and it's pretty evident when you start, when you realize you have tuh make a boundary with a person, like, just know in your heart that it's gonna hurt, like, you know, and I'm sure that we're, I'm not the only person going through this, and that's, I think, why it's important tuh share, is that, you know, because it's hard tuh share these things.
It's embarrassing. It's, I feel, it's almost, like, belittling. It's like, like, you know, it's like you're, you're sharing that you're rejected, essentially.
Who wants tuh share that? Like, who wants tuh admit that? But the truth is, is that we all have been there, and so I think that the biggest way tuh heal, and what I've learned is, of course, tuh find, to, like, lean in on the people who don't, like, desert you, betray you, talk behind your back.
I mean, that's the thing, is people who also, who are there, but they're really, like, kind of a snake in disguise, and, like, it's, like, like, they, it seems like they're there for you, but then behind, but you're walking on eggshells around them, because you know that they're saying things behind your back, and that's not, that's not healthy either, and so what I've really tried tuh do is really just focus on people that have really just been loving and nurturing, and the more people are loving and nurturing tuh me, whether they're family or not, the more I will lead, like, reach into them, and...
DOUG BUSTS IN TO TAKE A "QUICK PAUSE" FOR AN AD, IRONICALLY ABOUT INVESTING AND GOOD FINANCIAL HYGEINE.
JAMIE GETS RIGHT BACK TO IT: Of course, holidays and birthdays are tough because like you want like my mom like I mean forget it but like I love her and she's doing the best she can but like you know it's like I don't know I guess it's because I'm pregnant and then like when you become a mom and you just think about this relationship and it's like I just have always wanted that relationship with my mom and of course I know real like logically it's not gonna happen but anyways it's um it's just hard but anyways what I was trying tuh say tuh you though listening is like if you're going through this type of situation like just know that you're doing the right thing by kind of putting the boundaries up and then kind of you know you got tuh focus on gratitude more than anything else and so I consistently try tuh remind myself tuh be thankful that I am alive I'm able tuh be there for my kids my son has no idea who remembered and who forgot his birthday but of course he knows who he talked tuh but like you know I, I know that he had the most spectacular day yesterday and I made darn well sure of it and it literally cost me like zero dollars tuh it's not like it has tuh be expensive it wasn't extravagant we went tuh the library which is free and then we went tuh a free splash pad that's in our city and slash playground yeah, yeah and he had a great time so it's like people it's because the other thing people say well if you can afford tuh give them that it's like it doesn't you can find ways tuh live tuh like really bless your family and your kids without having tuh spend boatloads of money um but the biggest message and takeaway of this all and I guess of like I we never planned on sharing any of this we were planning on sharing about mother's day and
DOUG DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT tuh SAY, BUT SHE NEEDS tuh KNOW HOW PROUD HE IS OF HER, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH …
SHE THANKS HIM QUICKLY AND THEN GETS ON WITH HIS always getting by my side and like when I'm thankful for you when I started you know going tuh therapy and, and I mean forever ago I'm telling you forever ago when we were first married and I first started going tuh a therapist outside of married at first sight she told me she looked me in the eyes and she said Jamie like they might be family but they're not your people and you gotta go find your people and I didn't want tuh believe her I didn't want I literally just said you know thanks but no thanks essentially and I'm gonna try my best tuh turn this family into mine because I want this connection and I want this and I wish I could have saved myself all those years by just listening tuh her and you know finding my own people who, who do love and support me for who I am who I don't have tuh like I can just don't have tuh walk on eggshells I don't have tuh try tuh be anybody else I can just be myself and they'll see like the good in that and they'll like it you know and, and not everyone's for everyone and that's okay and I just try tuh remind myself that but anyways um yeah you've always stood by my side so thank you I see you I'll always be by your side I just like sometimes doubt like if like you know like, like, like what have I done like am I a bad person like did I like what have I done this has nothing
DOUG NOTES THAT THEY'D FIND PEOPLE "DOWN HERE" IN FLORIDA, AND THAT THEY BOTH KNEW IT WOULD NOT HAPPEN OVERNIGHT, THAT REALLY MEANINGFUL BONDS TAKE TIME, BUT THEY ARE IN THE BEST POSSIBLE POSITION TO BUILD A COMMUNITY AND MAKE STRONG FRIENDS THEY CONSIDER TO BE FAMILY, AMAZING PEOPLE, AND THERE ARE KIDS TOO, AND THEY CAN WATCH EVERYONE GROW UP TOGETHER … AND HE THINKS, "That's kind of the point of, of moving tuh Florida find community find our people and also find out you know who would be there with us and for us and …"
JAMIE BLASTS BACK: It has nothing tuh do with you or who you are well the truth is, is obviously it does because these people don't enjoy being around me so then therefore they don't enjoy remembering our kids and or me whatever I guess I think I'm just really hormonal and emotional but I guess I just feel incredibly rejected and like I've done something wrong but I also know at the same exact breath that this has been happening for years and years and years where I've really
DOUG NOTES JAMIE HAS "TRIED SO HARD" AND THAT IT'S NOTHING THAT SHE DID.
JAMIE BLATHERS BACK THAT IT'S NOT REALLY THAT THEY'VE DONE ANYTHING WRONG, BUT … we just don't jive and I guess you know we have different we're different people and we can't force it yeah and so there's very little control that we have over it other than us being us yeah and so but you know but I guess this is like the healing part that everyone talks about with boundaries that's so painful like it's so painful because when you want something so bad and like I think it's like wired in me because it's family and like I really want tuh support family and love family and be there for them and but then it's like but it's just not there in return and you could just spend your whole life searching for it and or you could kind of put up a boundary and, and stop allowing that tuh continue tuh hurt you and find people who are genuinely happy tuh be around you and so needless tuh say for those of you listening if - if you're in this boat with someone whether it's parents siblings aunts uncles cousins I don't know or even long-time friends who you think are quote-unquote friends but you know things change or who knows I mean it's so darn hurtful but I really believe at the end of the day that I mean I was I spent years and years and years trying my darnedest and now I'm like if I, If I could give like an inkling of that effort tuh someone who gives an inkling of the effort back tuh me like the just the joy and happiness that could come from that or just like the stability and also like I did try changing myself tuh kind of be more like them tuh have more in common with them and it just I can tell you right now if you're trying tuh do that that's not gonna work either like it's hard unfortunately you just gotta be yourself in this world you gotta love with your whole heart and, and be selfless you know you can't expect people tuh just care about you if you don't care about them of course you gotta show up for people you gotta really like put yourself out there for them but if you consistently do that and you're not getting any of it in return you gotta change your path and it's the hardest thing in the world tuh do but you know tuh be very, very honest like going tuh bed with Doug last night after Son's birthday and like just everything that went down and whatnot I was just like and this is why we live in Florida this is why we moved here because this this served our core family more so than trying tuh fit a round peg into a square everyone else's schedule and everybody else's lives it's just you know and it's and I'm incredibly thankful tuh your sister and tuh your mom and your dad of course because they did reach out and that's just really, really kind like they called and they just show that they really care and that really means the whole wide world tuh me and like regardless of what they think of me like they love our kids and that's really all that
DOUG NOTES WHAT MATTERS IS-AND MAYBE THEY NEED TO BELIEVE IN SOME KIND OF "HIGHER PURPOSE," BUT HE DOESN'T CONSIDER IT ALL "WASTED TIME OR ENERGY," AND THAT IT MAYBE HAPPENED THE WAY IT'S SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN AND FOR JAMIE TO GIVE …
AND SHE CUTS HIM OFF TO SAY THAT THIS MESSAGE CAN help others. I've really kind of like avoided being this vulnerable lately because I feel like there are some people who just really don't like me and it's been brought tuh my attention and just no matter what I do they really don't like me and I guess like everybody has quote-unquote haters but it hurts my heart a little bit and I don't know but, but the truth is, is like just like I said before what I learned in this the certain boundaries that I've talked about before is that you really can't change who you are in the hopes that people will start tuh approve of you because they're never like the people who just choose that they don't like you and they just choose tuh find your faults will always like they will always see your faults and they will always yeah there's no convincing them otherwise and that's and if you're listening tuh this like this is the truth for all of us is that when you're looking for the good in life you're gonna find the good and you can focus on that and try tuh get like more of that and garner more of that but if you're focused on the negative whether it's in life or with your spouse or with a friend or at the workplace you're gonna find that and so if so sometimes if you've you know if you see that you're consistently feeling like you have quote-unquote bad luck or that this person's being wrong tuh you or they're not caring about you will try tuh think about the good that they do and, and, and so truly like for me with these whole boundary things like I've tried just I tried tuh kind of I've already tried that with some of these family members that just don't seem tuh care and um and, and so that's and then that's when the hurt comes is you know when you realize oh yeah you're actually all right and you are onto something and for whatever reason their life isn't aligning with yours and it's and that's okay but it doesn't mean it's not gonna hurt a little bit for the person who like wants it tuh be there but that's when you go out and find someone who wants tuh align their life with you or maybe their life already aligns and they just and you can serve each other you can love each other you can be there for each other and whether it's blood related or not like that will serve you better in life and so that's kind of where I think Doug and I are right now um but also for, for you listening if, if you're just finding yourself in this situation too just try tuh make sure you're not just trying tuh find the fault in someone because you don't want tuh get caught in that rabbit hole and there are people out there who just want tuh find the negative and then there are people out there who cut that down like don't allow that tuh happen tuh yourself because you will be miserable your whole life hating on someone else and just constantly finding their faults and constantly complaining about them is never going tuh bring you true happiness it really isn't and so think about you know yourself and like what you can do differently and try tuh bring the positive and so yeah I haven't been as vulnerable lately because it's been hard tuh be very honest tuh just share like my heart and then people are just going tuh attack me for it you know I'm sure but um but my goal in sharing this if we end up sharing this is that it helps the one person out there or I'm sure several really who are in the same exact boat who are you know trying tuh keep a friend that they've had forever but that friend's just not there or trying tuh maintain a relationship with one of your parents or your siblings or it shouldn't be hard it shouldn't be and you shouldn't have tuh change who you are and if you do then that's really just not the right person for you and, and you can talk tuh them about it of course and then if they're just combative, at the end of the day, I just say the best advice is find a therapist, and this book called Boundaries, and it's a little religious, and also a little kind of like, whoa, but I'm telling you, Chapter One, just give it – if you don’t' like it after that, don't even try, but like Chapter One, I was like, wow, I can see so much of myself in this, and I can see how could change, and I've got tuh promise you that it's been hurt along the way, but I have – we have, and our family has more positive days now than stressful, trying tuh like pull people in who don't really want tuh be there, trying tuh help them remember because they're gonna forget, like it's just – like yesterday was like the least stressful day ever, and we didn't have one person coming tuh our – or even Mother's Day, it was just us four, and you know, before I had kids, and I think – I saw someone else write this, but like before I had kids, I looked at the world as like everyone I encountered, and how can I be helpful tuh them, and that – like, but now it's like my world is my husband and my children. My world is within my four walls, and how do I love them and support them the best that I possible can, tuh help them become good – eventually like good husbands, a good wife, good mothers, good fathers, and good, good family members, and so …
DOUG IS SO PROUD OF HER AND THINKS SHE SHOULD ALSO BE PROUD OF HERSELF BECAUSE OF "HOW MUCH YOU HAVE GROWN FROM PEOPLE STARTING TO COMMENT ON SOCIAL MEDIA, AND YOU TRYING TO BRING THEM BACK OVER TO YOUR SIDE TO RECOGNIZING THE TOXICITY OF IT, AND SETTING BOUNDARIES." HE HAS TO TELL HER THAT IN THE PAST COUPLE OF YEARS, SHE HAS "SPREAD MORE POSITIVITY, IN MY MIND, THAN ANYBODY, FOCUSING ON BEING THANKFUL AND GRATEFUL," AND A MESSAGE SHE IS PASSING ONTO THE KIDS WHO ARE REALLY STARTING tuh THINK ABOUT IT AND FOCUS ON IT, AND IT'S "DRIVEN BY YOU."
MORE RASPY WHINY TEARY VOICE: Oh, Gosh, Doug's that's the nicest comment that I could have ever received because I really want that for them … yeah, because I – because we could all fall into that where you see the negative and you just kind of focus on that, and I'm trying so hard not to, and tuh just – you know, pray more, and even meditate, and that has nothing tuh do with prayer, but like just rewire my brain tuh like the positive things and finding the positive and helping others, also because – honestly, and I want tuh raise my kid where they are not seeing the negative, they're seeing the positive in situations because life, regardless of who loves you, how much money you have, what home you live in, what car you drive, life is so much better when you're able tuh see the positive and you're able to, like lean into that more, and you're able tuh then attract people who are like that, and the Negative Nellies are just going tuh always be there talking their smack about you, and that's fine, but like, if you can find the positive, you can focus on that, and you're going tuh have such a happier life, and the Negative Nellies, unfortunately, like I still pray for them, I still hope for them, because it's sad – like they're not living a happy life. You can't be a hater tuh all these people and be happy. It's sad.
DOUG THINKS THEY ARE "living proof of it, because once we started tuh focus on happy, once we started focusing on being thankful and grateful, the people that we attracted are the people that we would want tuh be with … didn't happen overnight, but as soon as we started tuh rethink that, and really try tuh be positive and do positive things, and our prayers and with the kids and being thankful and finding good, and gratitude, you know, we attracted people into our lives that, you know, are going tuh be there – I mean, I feel these are now lifelong friends, and you know, all of that was attracted, and there has got tuh be something tuh that."
THE END, THEY MUST GO PICK UP THEIR DAUGHTER BUT ONLY AFTER THE FIVE-STAR REVIEW AND THEN "SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!"
DELUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSIONAL – THE BOTH OF THEM! And according to the AI program Jamie talks more than 90 percent of the time, and Dud, hardly ever.

TL;DR: Found someone to play with using the tag search, found out it’s a kid I can’t even understand, looking for adults to play with.
I added this guy with the tags Lego, Survival, and Mic Off. It was going great until he started inviting his friends, which I didn’t really care about because we were on a fresh world instead of my main one—but I kept having to kick one of his friends because they kept breaking my builds and emptying my chests and every time I kicked them, he kept inviting them back. Blocking them didn’t even help. I ended up kicking and deleting him too so he’d get the hint, but he immediately tried to add me back and I felt bad so I accepted.
The last straw for me was when he had his mic on the other day and not only did he turn out to be a kid, he was French so I couldn’t even understand a single thing he was saying. Well, that and he took the very few amount of rubies, blast core, shells, and brute scales that I had.
I’m 30…sometimes I play with my nephews or my friend’s kids when their friends aren’t online but it’s different because I know them personally, and I can understand them. This makes me uncomfortable, especially considering Lego is my main game/mode now and I’m on almost every day. Kids just play different and I’m not about that in this grindy of a game.
So I guess I’ll try here…
Looking for a group of some regularly active adults to play with.
-New world or existing idc I don’t mind the grind and I don’t use others’ resources or tools without permission.
-Prefer mic off but I have one if needed.
-I have all the item shop sets except Durr Burger and the new Star Wars decor.
-Usually play typical survival but lately been playing with the settings stamina off, drop inventory on elim off, friendly fire on, and animals removed on elim off.
If interested, please comment or DM me your display name so I can add you. I set my accepting friend requests to off for now because I deleted the kid gang and I know they’re going to try to re-add me again.