How to nurses a calf muscle

(I am not seeking medical advice or definitive answers, just experiences and possible thoughts, thanks in advance.)
Hi All, I am F27 if it matters..
I don't know how to word any of this exactly so please bear with me.
I had my first seizure in Sept. of 2022. At the time I was experiencing a horrible battle(?) with sciatic nerve issues to the point I could barely walk and was in constant pain. When this seizure happened, I was taken to the ER and given an emergency surgery to correct my nerve pain issue. As a result, that one was just attributed to the amount of pain I was in.
Fast forward to Dec. of 2023 and I was at work, in the break-room. The last thing I remember was trying to eat some lunch and then I woke up being wheeled out of the store and into an ambulance. I was terrified and in SO much pain. According to the coworker that called 911 and helped me, I was tense/rigid with my arms straight in the air and not responding to anything. At one point, she and the other co-workers assisting said I got violent and resistant, as well as cussing and threatening them, which obviously I don't remeber either. Also, apparently before my waking up on the stretcher, I was fully "aware" and talking to EMTs in the break-room. They asked the typical questions, to which I got all the answers wrong, and I don't remember this period either.
In the ER I waited forever per usual, received a CT, blood work, etc. I ended up being admitted because they wanted to monitor me. I was taken to the neurology floor and at that point it had been 6+ hours since the first seizure at work. Upon the nurse starting the exam to complete admission paperwork, she asked me to sit up and grip her hands for one of the tests and (as I was told) I instantly went tense and my HR skyrocketed, I had a fully tonic seizure that lasted for around 10 minutes. A rapid response was called on me and at one point I stopped breathing. The whole ordeal probably lasted 30ish? minutes and I regained consciousness at one point, confused and scared. After that I stayed on the floor for a few days, got an MRI and an EEG, both showing nothing.
I saw my first outpatient neurologist when I was discharged and he barely spoke to me and did not want to hear questions or address concerns, simply said I had epilepsy and sent me on my way; With that going so poorly I am currently on Keppra twice a day and am waiting to see a better neuro in AUGUST.
All of that said, I think I may have been dealing with other types of seizures for years but brushed them off as things such as anxiety, or whatever else. I have had muscle spasms that were painful, facial numbness, twitching in random muscles throughout my body and in my face/eyes. I have also had bouts of word or communication issues (not sure what to call them) where I would say something but I wasn't saying what I thought I was. Easiest example: I was with my brother and friends in a drive-thru getting food. I order what we want, the lady repeats something so completely different and wrong, so I say no and proceed to order what I thought I was ordering and she repeats wrong again. That went on for a few times while I was getting upset and frustrated. When we got done the others in the car with me told me I was saying what the woman was and NOT what I thought I was saying.
I think there are some other things, maybe really bad Déjà vu and other stuff that I can't remember because I am feeling very weird right now even.
I just want to know what people think and what others have experienced.
If you read this I truly appreciate it. I am just so scared and anxious and trying to deal until I can see someone and get some more tests done. Thank you.

Plot
When Beshte's dad Basi gets injured by a frightened young rhino while creating hippo lanes in the flood plains after a big rainstorm, Beshte must step up and make the hippo lanes instead. Meanwhile, Kion, Bunga, Ono, and Fuli lead a herd of stubborn antelope led by Bupu to higher ground, and Makuu and his float of crocodiles return and try to help Basi so that there will be no rules to stop them.
Song: "Makin' Hippo Lanes"
Pros
-This is a really sweet father-son episode between Beshte and Basi. It's the first episode where we really get a feel for who Basi is as a character and I really like him. He's loving, compassionate, kind, sweet, fatherly, encouraging and most importantly supportive of Beshte just because he made a mistake while making the hippo lanes.
I like him because he's such a model dad, comforting Beshte about his mistake and not just flying off the handle and chewing him out for it. I love this because Beshte can't be older than 14 at this point and so he still has a lot to learn. Plus, it was his first time making the hippo lanes that we wouldn't have had to make except that Basi got injured at the start when Habib (let's call the little rhino "Habib" from now on because it means "Precious" in Swahili) panicked and accidentally poked him with his horn. Anyways, I love Basi for being completely understanding, with the knowledge that Beshte is not used to making the Hippo Lanes and therefore, made a genuine rookie mistake.
-Makuu is back and I'm thrilled about this because he was such a cool, menacing and really charismatic villain. I love him because he has an ulterior motive that's kind of similar to Scar in the original film, to give himself power over the crocodiles and the entire floodplains. Another reason he's really cool is because he has a really menacing and threatening presence in the Pride Lands whenever he's around and actually looks like someone who you wouldn't want to mess with. I do think Beshte and Basi were right to chase him away though, because he was making the floodplains a scary place when it was supposed to be a safe place and he was clearly trying to terrorize everyone. Given all the trouble he caused in "Never Roar Again", I wouldn't want him in the Floodplains either, though. Also, there's again, another unspoken rule about not eating the children of the Pride Lands.
-I love the fact that Makuu has a bit of a rivalry with Basi and resents the idea the hippos (in the Pride Lands at least, remember guys, hippos are not like that in real life) are rule-following, peaceful animals in contrast to crocodiles. So, I'm not surprised that he has a personal vendetta against Basi's pod, especially considering that as long as hippos are in charge of the watering hole, Makuu can't really do anything because they are more powerful than him. From what we've seen in "The Rise of Makuu", he seems to have a long-standing rivalry with the hippos and they were probably always fighting.
"Hippos.... always obeying the rules," Makuu, aggravated. "Come on. One little rhino's not worth the effort." Realistic behaviour on his part. I mean, Basi and Beshte would whoop his ass into the next world if necessary. Hippos are way more ferocious than any other animal in the Savannah and are one of the fiercest animals worldwide.
-Why do you guys think Habib was in such a hurry anyway that he ran into the Floodplains even though the Hippo Lanes were not ready, yet? Do you think he was being chased by Makuu's float or was in a hurry to meet up with his herd or something?
-I liked when Kion and the rest of the Lion Guard came on the scene and how they're all equally concerned about Basi's leg being hurt by Habib (accidentally, of course). Kion informs him to not walk on that leg, which is actually a realistic thing because in feel life, if you do injure your leg, it's best not to walk on it for a while or at least not do anything strenuous and just start small so you can help it to recover rather than make the pain worse. Kion is such a sweet boy for informing him of that and constantly showing concern for every animal in the Pride Lands. Basi kind of feels all of the Guard's father in some way, doesn't he?
-"Maybe Basi should be on the Lion Guard too, Kion," Bunga. I mean, he's not wrong. The Pride Lands' wisest or the Pride Lands' kindest/sweetest animal. By the way, Basi would make a good teacher role for Kion and his friends.
-I like the worldbuilding and lore aspect in this episode. In this episode, as promised in the title, we are told that Basi is in charge of making the Hippo Lanes for the Pride Landers after a big rainstorm and that his son, Beshte, is learning the ropes of it at the start. I like this mechanic because Basi is the leader of the hippos in the kingdom, and so, it's job to teach his son what will be his responsibility someday. I like how every animal in the Pride Lands has their own customs.
-I love how much Beshte really wants to make the Hippo Lanes for Basi's sake because obviously, his father is in no fit to do them at that point. Beshte is understandably nervous because it's a huge responsibility for a child to have and he was just learning how to do it at the beginning of the episode. I love how Kion, being an absolute sweetheart, encourages him and ultimately relaxes him telling him that as the Strongest hippo in the Pride Lands, they all believe in him. Also, I like this mechanic of by making the Hippo Lanes, he'd be automatically helping with the circle of life, like he's supposed to.
-Bunga; "What's the big deal? The floodplains will dry up soon. There's not a cloud in the sky." Thunder clouds start rumbling over the Pride Lands. Don't jinx it! Fuli; "You what they say, if ya don't like the weather on the Savannah, just wait a few breaths." You're damn right, Fuli. That was actually a really funny joke they threw in the episode because it's very accurate.
-I've always liked the main plot-point of this episode because it's actually believable. Did you know that in real life, hippos are known as "ecological engineers" and can modify and influence their own habitat and ecosystem. Just like Basi and Beshte, after a heavy rainstorm in real life, hippos actually do plough through submerged wetland or grassland areas, that are used by other animals living in the same habitat. In doing so, they make nutrients flow around and end up making new gateways for different types of animals. Other animals follow the hippos into these wetland areas to access more food, nutrients and shelter. So, I like how this episode is about something that hippos actually do.
-I love Beshte in this episode. He's such a big, lovable and kind-hearted sweetheart who's whole motivation is to help animals get where they need to go and to do favours for them, even if he should've told them to wait until the hippos lanes are done. I just can't help but love him for giving animals rides and being kind to them. It fits well with his character to focus more on being nice than to focus on the task at hand, that he's only been assigned to this episode. He's just an adorable, sweet gentle giant whom I can't help but admire.
-I know he wasn't doing the Hippo Lanes the right way, but, I can't help but admire him for his kindness towards animals in the floodplains, even if they shouldn't have been in there in the first place and should've waited until Beshte was finished the task. I still admire him for giving them rides. I understand why Beshte would struggle to say "No" or "You have to wait til I finish the Lanes, okay." He's got a big-heart, like Kion in "Never Judge a Hyena By Its Spots" and "The Kupatana Celebration".
-And actually giving animals rides across the Floodplains, I think, would actually be a good idea, albeit not very convenient. Basi, the leader of the Hippos, probably does not have the time to take every small animal everywhere, not to mention it would be just as easy for them to cross the Floodplains themselves, or on another animal, like a lion or an antelope or something. Maybe they should start a "Pride Lands Riders Association for your crossing pleasures".
-I think the Hippo Lanes is an interesting and a wholesome concept. Hippos are not like in real life, they are extremely territorial to other animals and very aggressive and they are the most dangerous mammals in the world (BBC Wildlife Magazine). That being said, I think this could've been a very send off for Beshte after Season 3. I think this could've been a great new purpose for him instead of the writers making all the Lion Guard go to the Tree of Life. Plus, the start of the episode really hints at Basi training his son to take over his role in the circle of life, someday.
-For the most, I did like the rest of the Lion Guard in this episode. I'm glad that Beshte was the main focus though, because he hasn't really had a dedicated episode besides "Follow that Hippo" earlier on in the Season. But, I liked Kion being the serious, calm, yet frustrated leader trying to corral Bupu's herd of stubborn antelope. It's funny because I feel his frustration at Bupu's stubborn and stuck-up attitude over being bossed around, even though they weren't being bossed around. I love Fuli tolerating Bupu and trying hard not to lose her temper because she's so frustrated that the antelope are not following instructions even though it's all for the best. I feel her frustration towards Bupu because I would be losing my patience as well in that situation, with how annoying the antelope are being at this point. I love Bunga for trying to remain optimistic, but, even he's losing patience. I understand the Lion Guard's annoyance towards the antelopes at the beginning.
-Shout out to the little baby antelope in Bupu's herd for being one of the most adorable babies in the show and making a big pleading face at Bupu, to get out of the water. Also, shout out to Boboka for being the most protective and perfect mother to her little baby and the only real sane member of Bupu's herd. Seriously though, she's the only one reason that Bupu ultimately decides to follow the Lion Guard's instruction. I think she should be leader, tbh. Who let that guy lead the herd?
-"Hang on to your antlers," Bunga. "For one thing they're horns...." Bupu. That was funny because antelopes are often mistaken as being part of the deer family, but, they're actually part of the Bovine genus (aka Cattle family) and so have horns, not antlers. But, I also like the fact that the kids watching the episode may have thought they had antlers, like Bunga in that moment.
-Kion's Roar being used to move the rocks out of the way is a good idea because they would never be able to push them aside since Beshte was not with them at that point. Also, more evidence to suggest Kion and Beshte are the two muscles on the team.
-I like the random cute animals that are riding along on Beshte's back, Laini, Churu (the frog), a wagtail, a hare, young aardvark). I love these more cute scenes in The Lion Guard. Also, I know this not how the Hippo Lanes works, but, how could you say "no" to them?
-I like the way Beshte is not perfect at making the Hippo Lanes at first, he's a young teenager who's only filling in for his father on this occasion and still has a lot to learn about the role. It's like Kion learning how to be good leader. I like that Beshte is clearly a rookie who's not perfect and the job yet, but is learning and is eager to do it because Basi is injured. He's also not able to say "no" to the small animals because of his kind heart and again, his inexperience at making the Hippo Lanes. I love it when the writers explore all the members of the Lion Guard learning new jobs.
-"More like a curly elephant's trunk. Actually, they're more like a bunch of elephants trunks. All twisted up together. And stuck in a Baobab tree's roots." Ono's funny moments. You gotta love for that.
-"This way. Step right up. One new Beshte-made Hippo Lane for all your crossing pleasures! Moms and babies first!" That seems fair to me, tbh. Also, I can't tell you how much I love Bunga for his optimism and his kindness. Also, I love it when he calls them "anty-lanty-lopes".
-Bupu, "Now I bet you'll tell us to get out of the rain. Well, we're not going anywhere!" Fuli, "Good." Bunga, "Yeah, that's kinda what we want." Well done, Bupu, you did something sensible for a change. Also, no, there's no where for you to get out of the rain, anyway.
-Now let's talk about Kion and Ono going into the floodplains. After Boboka and her son accidentally go into the floodplains, thinking that the were ready, they end up getting lost. Kion and Ono go after them to rescue them. First off, Kion dives in to save Boboka's son from drowning. Drowning was a little a dark for this series, especially by Season 1's standards. But, on the other hand, I like stimulating, engaging cartoons that aren't afraid to get dark even if they are made for children. When I first watched that scene back when it came out, I was on edge even though I knew that he wouldn't drown. It made it exciting and compelling for older viewers. I like cartoons that challenge younger children with action sequences. Plus, it was exciting and Kion would obviously risk his own life for the baby, and it was all fine because they got out of it.
-Also, Kion has a big-heart to go and search for Boboka all on his own, without having any eyes in the sky. By the way, he's so much better at swimmer compared to the beginning of Season 1, that means he's gotten stronger at this point. Ono was good as well to protect and guide Boboka's son back to the herd. I mean, I kinda think Kion could've waited with the calf and Ono could've looked for Boboka, but, then again, Ono couldn't carry her like Kion. Maybe the calf could've stayed with them and he wouldn't drown with Kion and Ono around. I don't know, I did like the rescue scene, but, I don't know that that's how I would've done things. But, in fairness, Kion is only cub learning about his role and finding his feet at this point.
-Also, as annoying as Bupu was at the start, I do like the fact that this episode is like the precursor for Fuli and Bupu's "adult/child friendship" later on in the series. I like their dynamic in Season 2 because they're very similar to each other, hot-headed, impatient, short-tempered, stubborn, overconfident, strong-willed, but also very different from each other and so they clash, but are also very loyal to each other. I like how this episode basically founded their relationship. I did like how at the end of the episode, they came to an understanding in the end which was really sweet. By the end, I thought Fuli and Bupu had a really sweet "child/adult" dynamic.
-I loved Beshte and Basi's dynamic at the end too. After Beshte how the Hippo Lanes had gone wrong and that he thinks he let everyone down, Basi comforts him and agrees to help him make a new lane this time "straight and true". Another example of Basi being a total sweetheart and a freaking awesome dad, never once chastising his son for his mistake, but instead, helping him correct his mistake and understanding that it was Beshte's first time making the Hippo Lanes. I know I keep talking about it, but, I've always love their sweet father-son dynamic.
-Makuu returns at the end to murder Basi to in his words "get rid of the rules", while Beshte's back is turned. Makuu is a total savage this episode, but, he has been my favourite villain in Season 1. His voice actor, Blair Underwood is flawless and is clearly loving the role. He has so much charisma. Plus, Makuu trying to outright kill Basi was downright evil and cold and, not to mention dark for a show that was made for kids, after all. I mean, I knew he wasn't going to win, but he's still a great villain, with his intimidating presence in this scene. I get excited every time Makuu's float show up in the series.
-Also, Makuu attempts to murder Basi while he's injured. I thought that was interesting and smart because he knows that Basi would destroy him and his float under different circumstances. In the wild, hippos are, as I said, very aggressive, threatening and powerful, and could go completely ham on every animal if necessary. So, no crocodile can beat up a healthy and fit adult or teenaged hippo, even if they have numbers on their side. I get the writers gave Makuu more of a chance to make things interesting for the audience, but, I'm just saying it's no wonder Makuu opted to bring back up crocs. As soon as Beshte showed up to back Basi, Makuu gets a little afraid because, out of nowhere, came this healthy and fit younger and stronger hippopotamus, enraged by his presence.
-Now, of course Beshte was right to stop Makuu. I mean Makuu was so in the wrong when he said, "we get ride of the hippo, we get ride of the rules." He wasn't talking about hunting or being allowed to eat in the Pride Lands, he was talking about giving himself power over the whole Floodplains, with Basi out of the picture (which would obviously never come to pass because the Lion Guard are keeping Makuu in check at this point). Also, given what Makuu did the last time he tried to take over the Floodplains, I don't blame Beshte for kicking him out, in the end. And, most importantly, Makuu was going to attacked Basi. I mean, he is Beshte's father and Beshte would want to defend by him any means necessary. Of course Beshte wants to whip Makuu's ass at this point. It's one thing wanting to eat in the Pride Lands, but, Makuu clearly had an ulterior motive by wanting to kill of the hippo leader. But, also, I know I would want to do what I can if my family were in danger, I assume you guys in the comments would do the same.
-Speaking of Makuu's attack on Basi, I thought it was clever to use the Hippo Lanes as a way to outsmart him and defeat. Hippos can swim and sprint faster than crocodiles, and Makuu clearly did not see it coming what they were doing. So, I liked it a lot. Beshte went from struggling to do the Hippo Lanes correctly, to using them to defeat a terrible foe in the final act, ultimately tricking Makuu and his float into being trampled by Bupu's herd. Makuu decides to scram after this. Fun Fact: In real life, Beshte or Basi alone, could go completely ham on Makuu's float and essentially destroy them.
-Also, I am sure Kion, being one of Beshte's best friends, knew all about this attempted murder on Basi by Makuu. I think we can assume Beshte told him and the rest of the Guard at some point and that would've caused them to resent Makuu even more by the time of The Savannah Summit, where they do not see good in him for quite a while. Season 1 kind of hints that Kion and Beshte, in particular, had personal vendettas against Makuu because he had caused them stress in the past.
-Finally, to end this review, I liked the scene at the end where Basi commends Beshte for making the Hippo Lanes. It was word for word exactly what Simba said to Kion and Kiara in "Can't Wait To Be Queen", "I never had any doubt."
Cons
-Bupu was fairly annoying at the beginning of this episode. I really didn't like him until the very end. He makes me question, who the heck let this guy lead his herd, anyways? I get that the Lion Guard are children and all, but, they clearly made the right call to lead the antelopes away from their grazing grounds so they don't drown and ushering them away from the rockslide so they don't die. Bupu annoyed me the way he was acting all pissed off and dismissive of the Lion Guard. He accused them of bossing his herd around and berating them even though they wouldn't have had to get angry if Bupu had been more cooperative. It feels like he should already know to get to higher ground to protect his herd. I didn't like the fact that the antelopes were just standing around waiting to be drowned.
-I didn't like how Bupu was disrespecting Fuli towards the end just because she had been losing patience. I would be losing patience as well if I was in that situation. I don't like how when they got them away from their grazing grounds, Bupu said that they've come so far even though they barely left because of him. Also, why is it that Boboka (the sane one of the herd) had to be the one to talk him into it? I think she should be the leader, tbh. I don't like how he berates the Lion Guard, even though the Guard were leading them around so they would be safe. I'm really glad to see Bupu become more likable later on. I am not saying Fuli should've eaten him, but, I am saying that he should've more understanding and more appreciative of the Lion Guard's efforts to help.
-Bunga > Bupu any day. At least Bunga is shown to be cooperative, smart, intelligent, mature, sensible, polite, kind, understanding and wise when he needs to be. What does Bupu think this whole ordeal is, some kind of game? A hoax? A prank? How stupid can you get? I also don't like how Fuli had to apologise to Bupu at the end just because he made her frustrated. She didn't mean to get frustrated. And actually all the Guard got frustrated with the antelope. Fuli did not need to learn anything in this episode or admit to being wrong, in my opinion. Imagine if this had a more severe, life or death situation where they had to force the antelope along. Bupu should learn to understanding people's intentions better and maybe then he won't be a headstrong jerk.
-And the whole "It never hurts to be polite thing" could've been avoided if Bupu had just told that that's all he wanted at the beginning. But, more importantly, he's a terrible role model for little kids in this episode. He demands the Lion Guard say "please" for everything even though they are helping him and his herd get to safety so they don't die. He demands they be polite to him at all costs even they have tried to patient and calm and he wasn't having any of it. Kids need to see that you can't expect someone to say please all the time because there are times where you just have to do as you are being asked for safety or otherwise. I also don't like the way he refuses the get his herd out the floods when he should know what's best for them. He doesn't even think to get the calves out of the water and to higher ground. Leadership 101, for crying out loud! I don't like his attitude for most of the episode and the fact that he removes to see that the Lion Guard are only looking out for him and the rest of his herd by ordering them to cooperate and be safe.
-But, I also do not like his herd at the start of the episode. Boboka is, in fairness, the smartest and the least annoying in this episode because she has the herd's best interests at heart and wants to get them to safety. She also has a son that she wants to protect. But, if I were in her shoes, I would be leading the baby antelopes to safety whether the rest of the decided to follow or not. Are we really expected that there no other calves in the herd with older antelopes? I don't understand why she didn't just take her calf (with other antelope parents) and up and get to higher ground. So, yeah, I liked Boboka, but, that was the only time in the episode where she annoyed me. Any mother would want to get their baby to safety immediately.
Overall
So, I thoroughly enjoyed revisiting this episode and getting to review it. To recap, I loved Beshte and Basi's father-son dynamic. I thought it was really cute and sweet and loving. I love how much they are two characters that jump through hoops for each other to protect each other no matter what. They're kind of similar to Kion and Simba. I do like the dynamic between Basi and the rest of the Lion Guard as well. He feels very fatherly towards them and I like to think he was childhood friends with Simba and Nala, and still is. I found the rivalry between Basi, Beshte and Makuu's float interesting because the idea of the hippos and the crocodiles being at odds has come up before in the series. I find it interesting that they have some hatred for one another. Makuu was perfect as always. I love him whether he's in his villain phase or his reformed phase. Blair Underwood's performance is really spot on for Makuu. The episode was surprisingly dark, but, exciting with the whole Makuu trying to murder Basi and also Boboka and her son almost drowning in the floodplains. At the end, I enjoyed Fuli and Bupu's dynamic. It's an underrated "child/adult" friendship and is on par with Kion and Ma Tembo's. The jokes were pretty solid in it and I loved the scenery in the Pride Lands in this episode. I loved the more cutesy animals in this episode. The only animals that really annoyed me were the antelopes. I thought Bupu's stubbornness eye-rolling and I didn't like his rudeness. However, I still really love this episode and the antelope became a lot more polite later on. I thought the educational value was really interesting in this episode. I'll give it a 7.5/10 overall.

Looking for opinions on surgery. I’m working with a spine specialist and have had an ESI recently done (waiting to see how much it helps). Neurosurgeon appointment is scheduled for next week however this current dr has said surgery will likely be needed. I just want thoughts from people who’ve had similar findings and have been through this. Main symptoms: Bi-lateral sciatica from lower back to knees, numbness/tingling in left calf/foot, heaviness and weakness in both legs/lower back area. Went to ER last month when I could no longer take the pain after ignoring it for some time. Currently on Celebrex 2x a day and Lyrica 1x a day + have to top it off with weed and tylenol/muscle relaxers most of the time. Have not done any PT.

My headlights cast long shadows over the drive as I slowly crept forward. It wasn’t fear, primarily, that led to the care I was taking approaching the farm on the slick mud and gravel road that barely passed as such. It was the risk of getting stuck out here despite my four-wheel drive.
Shawn was nervous. His rapidly rising knee was his tell. It was no wonder that so few new vets wanted to work on large animals. Compared to a clinic the pay was abysmal, the hours were long, you were always on call, and though some liked the outdoors it came with danger.
I took a divot a little too fast causing Shawn to yelp and look over at me with ice in his eyes.
“Sorry, Bud. Can’t afford to get stuck so I’m taking it a little aggressive. Victor should have laid a new bed a gravel this season but times are hard. Prices for everything are sky high and its only getting worse.”
He nodded and let it go. He was set to take over my territory if he could handle a month or two of calls as my right hand. I doubt he’d last any longer than the last one had but I had to keep hope alive. I won’t be around forever.
We parked outside the barn and I killed the engine.
“Alright, remember what we talked about?”
He nodded.
“This isn’t like they teach you in school. Sure, you might help birth a calf or handle any of the other textbook stuff. But you will also see other things. It’s becoming more and more common these days, but there were always the outliers. This one shouldn’t be dangerous but you can never be too sure. Stay alert, stay alive.”
I patted his shoulder before stepping out to gather by gym back of tools, protective equipment, and medicines. I checked the chamber of my pistol and tucked it into my appendix holster.
Shawn stared.
“You really should get one.”
“We’ve talked about this before. I’m not really a gun guy. I’m just want to help this community.”
I shrugged. To each their own.
The mud squelched under our boots as we made our way into the dimly lit barn.
“Hey Vic, where is she?”
Victor looked exhausted. Sweat, dirt and dried blood stained his shirt. He stood unsteadily from the stack of hay he was resting on, using the but of his rifle as a crutch. He shook my hand and guided us further into the labyrinth.
“Thanks for making it out this late. It started a few hours ago. I thought her baby was breach so we starting getting everything ready when we called you the first time but...it wasn’t that. I..I’d only seen this happen once before, ten years ago when you came out to Tammy’s. But that was a goat. This…”
He trailed off as we approached the pens and cast the light from his lantern into the darkness.
She was laying on her side. Blood spattered the fence and walls of her enclosure. There was movement from its abdomen but the heifer was clearly dead.
“We don’t have much time. I need you to cover us, keep the rifle trained on the stomach.”
I opened the gate and started moving in. I was kneeling down next to her, opening my bag when I noticed Shawn was still frozen in place near Vic.
I snapped my fingers irritably. “Get over here. I need an extra pair of hands.”
He slowly broke from his trance and reluctantly walked over staring at the partially exposed birth canal. A half dozen black spears protruded from there, covered in viscera like some twisted urchin.
“What..”
I had my stethoscope on and was trying to determine both what, and how far along it was. It wasn’t good.
“Vic, you’ve got some problems. When did you separate her from the herd?”
He took a moment before responding. “About a day ago my son noticed she was acting strange, going in circles, not eating, trying to move towards the farmhouse.”
I shook my head. “Should have called me sooner. Ok. Well, we’ve got to keep a close eyes on the others. Make sure none have picked anymore of these up. Shears.”
Shawn handed me a large pair of surgical shears and large knife not unlike a scalpel and I got to work narrating what I was doing.
“Ok, so this is a parasite. We need to find a gap in it’s shell while it’s still young. We could try to terminate it now but if we pick a wrong spot for the injection it will go primi and then we’ll have some more problems.”
My hand was shaking as I explained it too him. It was farther along than I wanted to admit but I kept my voice steady.
I made an incision just past where the diaphragm would normally be and began cutting away the cows skin. Peeling back hide, fat and muscle, to get a look and the less developed side of the thing that had replaced the poor girls organs.
I hadn’t realized I had paused quite as long as I had trying to determine my next move.
“David?” Shawn asked. Despite the cold a bead of sweat ran down my brow.
I adjusted the headlamp to get a better look. It was pulsating. It looked nearly fully formed.
I glanced at Vic. “Stay alert. We need the Sheriff to send someone too.”
He knew what I meant I nodded, pulling out an old flip phone and dialing up the main line back in town. Shawn tilted his head.
No time to explain.
“Syringe, red vial.” I asked curtly.
It moved.
Shawn fumbled for the syringe.
“Syringe, red vial.” I repeated.
“I’ve got two black vials, a blue vial, no red vial.” He replied.
“We need the red vial. Now.” I demanded.
He started unloading everything from the bag.
It moved again and the sharp points began to exit the birth canal and expand.
“David, you might want to back away.” Vic chimed in.
“Red vial, Shawn.”
I turned to help him search.
Rookie mistake. It looked black in the dark but it was red. I loaded it into the large syringe and placed my hand on the thing. It’s entire surface was hard. This wouldn’t be easy.
“Shawn, get out of the stall. Vic, ready?”
Shawn shuffled out as I palpated the things cold hard shell trying to pick the least developed portion or a boundary between two segments. There was no clear spot, so I picked one and hoped I had enough strength to pierce it anyway.
Reaching back I slammed the syringe down as hard as I could.
My world went black.
I heard a gunshot, cursing, a scream, the crack of shattering wood.
Flashing lights. I was concussed. A deputy and an EMT were walking me out of the barn to the back of an ambulance. “Did I…”
Vic was there, hands shaking. He nodded. “I think you got it. We still gotta track it down, but I’m sure I saw that syringe in it’s hide as it fled.”
“Shawn? Where’s Shawn?”
Silence. I tried to climb down from the ambulance. “SHAWN!” I shouted.
The deputy and EMT held me in place.
“He’s gone.”
“What? What do you mean?”
Vic croaked, “He froze. It went right for him on it’s way out. I don’t think it was after him specifically but...he was in the way. I shot it twice. But..He’s gone.”
My head was spinning and I felt like throwing up.
Retirement would have to wait.

My headlights cast long shadows over the drive as I slowly crept forward. It wasn’t fear, primarily, that led to the care I was taking approaching the farm on the slick mud and gravel road that barely passed as such. It was the risk of getting stuck out here despite my four-wheel drive.
Shawn was nervous. His rapidly rising knee was his tell. It was no wonder that so few new vets wanted to work on large animals. Compared to a clinic the pay was abysmal, the hours were long, you were always on call, and though some liked the outdoors it came with danger.
I took a divot a little too fast causing Shawn to yelp and look over at me with ice in his eyes.
“Sorry, Bud. Can’t afford to get stuck so I’m taking it a little aggressive. Victor should have laid a new bed a gravel this season but times are hard. Prices for everything are sky high and its only getting worse.”
He nodded and let it go. He was set to take over my territory if he could handle a month or two of calls as my right hand. I doubt he’d last any longer than the last one had but I had to keep hope alive. I won’t be around forever.
We parked outside the barn and I killed the engine.
“Alright, remember what we talked about?”
He nodded.
“This isn’t like they teach you in school. Sure, you might help birth a calf or handle any of the other textbook stuff. But you will also see other things. It’s becoming more and more common these days, but there were always the outliers. This one shouldn’t be dangerous but you can never be too sure. Stay alert, stay alive.”
I patted his shoulder before stepping out to gather by gym back of tools, protective equipment, and medicines. I checked the chamber of my pistol and tucked it into my appendix holster.
Shawn stared.
“You really should get one.”
“We’ve talked about this before. I’m not really a gun guy. I’m just want to help this community.”
I shrugged. To each their own.
The mud squelched under our boots as we made our way into the dimly lit barn.
“Hey Vic, where is she?”
Victor looked exhausted. Sweat, dirt and dried blood stained his shirt. He stood unsteadily from the stack of hay he was resting on, using the but of his rifle as a crutch. He shook my hand and guided us further into the labyrinth.
“Thanks for making it out this late. It started a few hours ago. I thought her baby was breach so we starting getting everything ready when we called you the first time but...it wasn’t that. I..I’d only seen this happen once before, ten years ago when you came out to Tammy’s. But that was a goat. This…”
He trailed off as we approached the pens and cast the light from his lantern into the darkness.
She was laying on her side. Blood spattered the fence and walls of her enclosure. There was movement from its abdomen but the heifer was clearly dead.
“We don’t have much time. I need you to cover us, keep the rifle trained on the stomach.”
I opened the gate and started moving in. I was kneeling down next to her, opening my bag when I noticed Shawn was still frozen in place near Vic.
I snapped my fingers irritably. “Get over here. I need an extra pair of hands.”
He slowly broke from his trance and reluctantly walked over staring at the partially exposed birth canal. A half dozen black spears protruded from there, covered in viscera like some twisted urchin.
“What..”
I had my stethoscope on and was trying to determine both what, and how far along it was. It wasn’t good.
“Vic, you’ve got some problems. When did you separate her from the herd?”
He took a moment before responding. “About a day ago my son noticed she was acting strange, going in circles, not eating, trying to move towards the farmhouse.”
I shook my head. “Should have called me sooner. Ok. Well, we’ve got to keep a close eyes on the others. Make sure none have picked anymore of these up. Shears.”
Shawn handed me a large pair of surgical shears and large knife not unlike a scalpel and I got to work narrating what I was doing.
“Ok, so this is a parasite. We need to find a gap in it’s shell while it’s still young. We could try to terminate it now but if we pick a wrong spot for the injection it will go primi and then we’ll have some more problems.”
My hand was shaking as I explained it too him. It was farther along than I wanted to admit but I kept my voice steady.
I made an incision just past where the diaphragm would normally be and began cutting away the cows skin. Peeling back hide, fat and muscle, to get a look and the less developed side of the thing that had replaced the poor girls organs.
I hadn’t realized I had paused quite as long as I had trying to determine my next move.
“David?” Shawn asked. Despite the cold a bead of sweat ran down my brow.
I adjusted the headlamp to get a better look. It was pulsating. It looked nearly fully formed.
I glanced at Vic. “Stay alert. We need the Sheriff to send someone too.”
He knew what I meant I nodded, pulling out an old flip phone and dialing up the main line back in town. Shawn tilted his head.
No time to explain.
“Syringe, red vial.” I asked curtly.
It moved.
Shawn fumbled for the syringe.
“Syringe, red vial.” I repeated.
“I’ve got two black vials, a blue vial, no red vial.” He replied.
“We need the red vial. Now.” I demanded.
He started unloading everything from the bag.
It moved again and the sharp points began to exit the birth canal and expand.
“David, you might want to back away.” Vic chimed in.
“Red vial, Shawn.”
I turned to help him search.
Rookie mistake. It looked black in the dark but it was red. I loaded it into the large syringe and placed my hand on the thing. It’s entire surface was hard. This wouldn’t be easy.
“Shawn, get out of the stall. Vic, ready?”
Shawn shuffled out as I palpated the things cold hard shell trying to pick the least developed portion or a boundary between two segments. There was no clear spot, so I picked one and hoped I had enough strength to pierce it anyway.
Reaching back I slammed the syringe down as hard as I could.
My world went black.
I heard a gunshot, cursing, a scream, the crack of shattering wood.
Flashing lights. I was concussed. A deputy and an EMT were walking me out of the barn to the back of an ambulance. “Did I…”
Vic was there, hands shaking. He nodded. “I think you got it. We still gotta track it down, but I’m sure I saw that syringe in it’s hide as it fled.”
“Shawn? Where’s Shawn?”
Silence. I tried to climb down from the ambulance. “SHAWN!” I shouted.
The deputy and EMT held me in place.
“He’s gone.”
“What? What do you mean?”
Vic croaked, “He froze. It went right for him on it’s way out. I don’t think it was after him specifically but...he was in the way. I shot it twice. But..He’s gone.”
My head was spinning and I felt like throwing up.
Retirement would have to wait.

I started leaking during the second trimester of my pregnancy in 2022. The best way to describe the leaking is if you shut off the faucet but only like 99% of the way and you get that like really slow drip drip drip. I do leak when I sneeze or laugh or exercise but it’s primarily just this constant drip.
I did physical therapy for a bit but trying to get to appointments with a newborn was too much (was also dealing with severe ppa/ppocd). Plus the cost of weekly appointments alongside the cost of bi-weekly therapy appointments. I then started seeing a urogyn. She came highly reviewed. From the minute I explained my issue, she seemed wildly confused and like she didn’t believe me. She spoke like she’d never heard of someone experiencing leaking like I do and therefore I must be wrong.
She started with an in-office urodynamics test but she couldn’t recreate the leak. She had me to the Azo pad test to make sure it’s urine leaking. It is. Then she scheduled me for a video urodynamics test. If you don’t know what this is, it’s awful. It’s absolutely awful. I was anxious and stressed and tense and in pain the whole time. So naturally they couldn’t recreate the leak.
My urogyn said ok let’s do the Bulkamid injections to bulk up the bladder muscles. This will help. We decided that with how viscerally I reacted and how anxious I was with the video urodynamics (SA Survivor), it would be best to do anesthesia for the bulkamid.
She said it was a very small chance I wouldn’t be able to pee after and if so, I’d need a catheter for the day/night to wake my bladder. Well. I couldn’t pee after. The nurse couldn’t get the catheter in but kept trying. I had like 3 people just shoving hands around down there and i just started crying. The catheter was naturally so uncomfortable and they didn’t do the leg strap version so just imagine trying to keep a climbing toddler from accidentally ripping out a catheter for 24 hours.
It’s been months since the procedure. The leaking is no better. Not even a tiny bit. It didn’t work. But we paid $5k for it. Yay US Healthcare!
I contacted my doctor and her reply was that maybe now I just need to lose weight. I’m currently 230 and 5’6. I weigh a bit less now than when I found out I was pregnant. I’ve gained weight since I was 18 due to various hormonal issues and chronic pain. I’ve started exercising a tad more regularly but it’s hard when you feel like you’re peeing yourself during a workout.
I’m now at an absolute loss of what to do.

I randomly got very sick a few years ago. I am not sure of the cause, but I believe it may have been COVID, which I believe unfortunately spurred on a pretty severe autoimmune reaction. It came on very sudden, first with brain fog, then a dull pressure headache, and then muscle twitching, what felt like a fever, neuropathy on the left side of my body (It began in my face and went downwards, used to affect both sides but only the left side now), ear ringing, throbbing headaches, upper body burning pain, dizziness, memory issues, neck stiffness, sinus inflammation that caused watery mucus, and other issues. I remember one day about a month into my issues, I had an extreme warmness in my face and nearly constant ear ringing on and off. It was the strangest thing.
I was able to see a PCP about a month into my issues. My PCP did not seem to consider my issues of an urgent nature, even with sudden neuropathy, memory loss, dizziness, etc. I had a CT scan of my brain 3 months after initial illness which showed mild volume loss and possible encephalomalacia.
It took me a year to finally see a neurologist for it due to waiting times. The first one I saw was dismissive and told me to wait and see if I got better (I didn't). The second one I saw, and am still seeing, didn't even see me personally the first time, and had his nurse look at me instead, and did nothing for my issues save for trying a very small dosage of Gabapentin for a few months, which I stopped taking due to it not doing anything for me. The third one I saw for a second opinion of the second one told me "I don't know what's causing your symptoms" and just left it at that. I saw a rheumatologist in 2022 who also didn't do anything for my neuropathy, just more blood work testing.
I complained to doctors/specialists about chronic body inflammation feelings, such as intense upper body burning, head pressure, dizziness/vertigo, memory issues, neuropathy, etc. and they have never ordered a spinal tap to see if there was something in the CSF causing the chronic feeling. I have had brain MRIs that showed possible idiopathic intracranial hypertension with mild CSF buildup in the optic nerve and a partially empty sella turcica, but again, no spinal tap was ordered because my eye exam by a neuro-ophthalmologist was clean and showed no swelling. My brain MRIs also showed volume loss possibly caused by encephalomalacia, again, no spinal tap done. I had an EMG/NCV of my left arm done in 2021 that was normal.
I've had blood work for lupus and celiac that was negative, and an ANA rating that was barely positive. Normal rheumatoid factor and negative for Sjogren's as well. I just checked and I believe I am negative for vasculitis as well, Antineutrophil cytoplasmic antibody test was negative looking back at my testing in 2022. I also had a sinus CT scan a year into my issues that showed mild sinusitis. I am not diabetic but I was pre-diabetic when this began. Glucose testing has been normal, cholesterol is fine, lipids are fine. B12 is normal, but vitamin D is low.
It has been over 3 years now and I still have neuropathy in certain parts of the left side of my body (mainly my face and genitals, I'm male and was born male) and again, nothing was done for me regarding a spinal tap, which is the only test outside of a PET scan that I haven't done which could be helpful for me as far as I know. I saw that third neurologist for a second opinion, and all he did was say maybe to get a spinal tap if I have chronic headaches, but other than that, like I said, he said outright he didn't know what was causing my symptoms.
I cannot work with how I feel, and it feels like neurologists and doctors in general left me to rot and deal with the chronic issues on my own, and now I'm going to be stuck with long-term, permanent issues such as nerve damage in my face and genitals because no doctor cares. I have ED and anorgasmia now along with the neuropathy that affects my genital area. It's just on the left side for some reason. It used to be tingling/burning on the left side of my genital area and face and now is reduced sensitivity issues. In 2021 I had a very sharp pain on the left side of my penis when I touched the right side of it, it was very scary and made me believe the nerve may have died, but that went away with very slow improvement, but that side is still not back to normal.
I still sometimes have dizziness and headaches, for instance, if I'm in a car and I watch the cars speed by us at an intersection, I'll feel sort of dizzy. It's not as bad as it was, but it's still not normal to feel like that, and no doctor has done anything for that or suggested it.
Am I wrong to think a spinal tap should have been ordered? Is there any reason they didn't, even after I asked? 0 out of the 3 neurologists I've seen in the past three years or so recommended one, so I did try getting second and even third opinions. The first neurologist genuinely just brushed me off, he didn't even order any testing. Just sent me on my way without a follow up appointment after saying to "wait it out".
What testing would be reasonable for a doctor to order that I haven't had done yet? Are there any tests/treatments they should have done? Would putting me on corticosteroids early on have helped reduce the neuropathy? Should they have tried medications like Prednisone or something, something to calm the inflammatory issues? How long can you take those for? How is it people with long-term issues like Lupus deal with the effects of drugs like that? Can't you get diabetes from long-term usage of treatments like corticosteroids/immunosuppressants? Is it common for them to try it for assumed COVID patients dealing with neuropathy, which I believe is what happened to me?
I live in America and am on my state's Medicaid. I recently switched PCPs (my previous one was condescending and didn't seem interested in my issues) and the new PCP referred me to a new neurologist I'm going to see later this year, but it just feels at this point all they can do is assess the damage and not fix it due to it being so long since I got sick and my issues never really totally fixing itself.
I had an MRA of my head last month that was clean thankfully, so I didn't have a stroke or some sort of blood vessel damage in my arteries. I saw a neurosurgeon a few weeks ago that I last saw in 2021 who still believes my cerebral atrophy (which I'm guessing is the volume loss likely caused by encephalomalacia) is abnormal for my age (mid-20s).
The only real "testing" I have left that my neurologist has ordered is neuropsychological testing which will be a few hours. I am 90% positive that my issues are from something, likely a virus, causing severe chronic inflammation all over my body including my head. I was never in the past 3 years given anything to treat that inflammation.
TL;DR: Got very sick years ago, told doctors of body weakness and pain, what felt like inflammation in my body, nerve damage, memory issues, etc. was not given any real treatment for what was still occurring in my body, which seemed to be chronic severe inflammation going on.
Please feel free to ask questions, and apologies for the length of my post.

Part 2
I think it’s time to face facts: I really am no different from those morons in horror movies after all.
I’ve been doing a lot of poking my nose where it doesn’t belong recently. Recently, I found something interesting in one of the old storage closets: a school photo marked September `14. There the headmistress was in the back, and I could almost swear I saw a smile there, which I’d previously thought impossible. But she wasn’t the only face I recognized. That little girl in the bottom right… it had to be Katie.
Sure, she looked different. Blank and robotic and expressionless, like the Hastings were. As if she didn’t quite realize how to act human yet. But it had to be her. Sure, it was chronologically impossible, but at this point, I was ready to believe anything.
I beckoned her over to have a seat next to me at recess, photo in hand. “Hey, Katie,” I greeted. “Sorry to interrupt. I just wanted to ask if this picture, well… looked familiar to you.”
She took one look at the photo, and the biggest grin dawned on her face. “Oooh, hehe, yeah, I remember that! That was when I first got here!” She held it in her hands, and started laughing giddily at the sight of herself looking so stone-faced. “Look at me! I look so goofy! Man, I really had no idea what I was doing back then!”
“Are you sure? Because this photo, well… it was taken around ten years ago. According to your file, you would’ve been a baby when this was taken.” I took a deep breath. “Katie, can I… can I ask how long you’ve been going to this school?”
She froze. That big grin slowly fell into a frown, her voice lowering. “That’s… one of the things I’m not supposed to tell you.” She shrugged. “Sorry.”
One of the things? Oh, God only knows just how many things even my students know about this school that I’m hopelessly unaware of. I think she could see the despair on my face, because she tried offering something else in recompense. “But I can tell you abooout… him!” She pointed eagerly to the boy standing beside her in the photo, an unassuming lad with dirty blonde hair. I’d never seen him before. “You see him? His name was Elijah! He was my very first friend, ever! He was the headmistress’ son, did you know that?”
“No, I had no idea.” I shook my head, flabbergasted. I couldn’t imagine that statue of a woman having any family whatsoever. “Wait… was? Can I… can I ask what happened to him?”
She looked left and right, before leaning in and whispering furtively in my ear. “Hunters.”
And then her friends called her over, and she went right back to chasing them around the playground, leaving me with a million lingering questions.
I’ll be honest — I’m not coping with all of this terribly well. I’m already lapsing back into old, bad habits. There’s a good reason, after all, that I was fired from my last real job. But the moment I step onto school grounds, I force that smile back on my face. Can’t let the kids know that there’s anything wrong with ol’ Mister Vermeil.
But I’ll be honest. Sometimes, when I see them, I just can’t help but wonder what hides beneath those masks of human skin.
Am I doing the right thing here? The social skills I’m teaching were supposed to help them live a normal life — but what if they don’t end up choosing that path? What if one of them instead opts to follow in their parents’ footsteps, and grows up to ply the skills I taught them to lure in human prey? Blend into society like a skinwalker, and pick people off one by one? Would that blood be on my hands?
It was just as my doubts were at their peak when I received the first text, from an unknown number. I was ready to dismiss it as typical spam, but opening it stole my breath away. It was a distant photo of me and Katie as we’d just been talking — and judging from the angle, it must have been taken from inside the school. I quickly glanced up at the upper windows, but saw no sign of any silhouette staring back at me.
Accompanying it was simply the words: ’Do you know what she is? Do you really, truly know?’
I know I should have blocked the number, and immediately contacted the headmistress. But curiosity burned in my chest. I needed to know. So I replied, honestly, that I hadn’t the foggiest idea.
The next text came almost instantly. ’This is the trail of death her mother has left behind in her wake. Study it carefully.’ Accompanying it was photos of several clippings from old local newspapers from various countries and decades.
The first came from the codrii of Moldavia. An old man complained to the municipality about a terrible buzzing that would echo across his fields for hours at a time. And then the letters stopped, and three months later, his body was discovered. Part of the reason it took so long was the complete absence of the stench of deterioration. It was though he’d been embalmed in his own bed — all fluids drained and organs removed with surgical precision. Cause of death was ruled as exsanguination.
The next came from the forests of the Cameroonian Highlands. A married couple and their child had gone out on a routine hiking expedition, and excitedly texted a friend about an immense ‘bird’ they’d seen that had briefly blotted out the sun. That text was the last time they were ever seen or heard from. A week later, a farmer saw one of their skins fluttering in the breeze. That’s it — just the hollowed, transparent, dried-out set of skin. The farmer had attempted to catch it, but the skin blew away in the wind like discarded wrapping paper, and was never recovered.
That was just the start. He had a whole laundry list of articles, and pouring over them brought tears to my eyes. Oh God, those poor people. What kind of creature could even do that sort of thing? My eyes drifted back to Katie, and I wondered again what laid beneath that disguise. Given the age of that photo, was she even truly a child? For all I know, she could be older than I am.
Another text. ’This place is playing you for a fool. I know what’s really going on here. Meet me in your office.’
In my dinky little office: nothing. Doubt crept in. Was this some sort of test set up by the headmistress? I was just about to take my leave, when suddenly, an unfamiliar voice opened up from directly above me. “Mister Vermeil.”
I looked up… and saw a face staring down at me from the vent grate in the ceiling.
No, not a face. It had all the features of a face; eyes, ears, nose, smiling mouth. But all arranged in the wrong order, as if plastered wantonly to a discolored, lumpen dough ball of flesh. It felt like something out of a dream.
I stammered blithely, uselessly. The meat started to push forward, dividing itself into five neat sections through the slits in the vent grill like a human body being pushed through a pastry cutter. I watched as tissues and sinews and raw bone dropped to the floor like melting candle wax, melding into a puddle of viscera that grew solid as more biomass gelled with its bulbous form.
And in time, that puddle of meat dripping from the ceiling became a man. That smiling face was staring me down again, now in proper arrangement yet no less deranged. He was handsome, actually, with a fit figure as perfect as his fine-gelled hair. Nude, but sexless as a Ken doll.
I finally started to run for help… but was stopped by the feeling of something digging into the side of my neck hard enough to draw blood. A jagged bone had jut from his wrist like the point of a spear. “Ah ah ah. You had your chance to go running away. It’s too late now,” he whispered. “Oh, don’t look at me like that. I only wanted to make your acquaintance. I’m a big fan of yours, after all.”
“A… a fan?”
“I’ve always admired the sort of man willing to betray his own species for a quick buck,” he mocked. “This is nothing personal, really. I’m just here to do my job, just like you. In fact… I was thinking we could work together.”
I felt like I might faint. Seeing this, he let me sit down at my desk, albeit with the bone still to my throat. “Who… what… are you?”
“Call me… Saladin,” he answered, in a tone that made it clear it was a pseudonym. “And… well, I’d like to say that I’m still human, but that would be a lie, wouldn’t it? Used to be. But in my line of work, I’ve had to find ways to… even the playing field.” I noticed the irony of being accused of ‘betraying my species’ by a man who seemed to have forsaken his altogether. I was reminded of an old Nietzche quite, something about ‘he who fights monsters’…
“Don’t you mock me, boy.” His face suddenly soured, as if he’d read my thoughts. “You’d become some breed of horror, too, if you’d kept consorting with these unnatural things. When dealing with matters of the occult for long, there are two options: sacrifice your life, or your humanity. There is no third path.”
His cocky grin returned. “Just ask poor William.”
Just hearing that name was like a punch to the lungs. It knocked the breath from me. “William? You…?”
“Of course I knew him. He was one of my feelers. I posted him out here to see if it would lure out the hunting dogs. Prove this place is really as the rumors say. And sure enough…”
A streak of rage rose in my chest, battling the fear. “And now… you want me to be your next useful idiot?”
“I always like a man on the inside,” he taunted. “I only need to kill one child. Just a single one. And this entire Initiative will fall apart like a house of playing cards. All the trust the Headmistress has built up with the parents… oh, they’d all tear her limb from limb.”
He saw the look of horror on my face, and laughed. “Don’t tell me you’re actually loyal to her. Did she… warn you of the danger you were in when you took this job? Has she done anything to your benefit? Do you really think she cares?”
“Why do you think she even hired you? Just out of the kindness of her heart? She’s a big believer in giving second chances to losers with a drinking problem and a rap sheet?” He cackled. “No. It’s because you have nobody. You’re a loser, all alone. So in case one of those ‘kids’ gets the munchies one day… nobody will even notice you’re missing.”
“Sure, they may look harmless now. But make no mistake: sooner or later, some of those kids will need to feed. Isn’t their fault. It’s in their biology, their very being. They were made to prey on people like you and me. And you… you’re planning on helping them blend in! Surround themselves with clueless pedestrians with tasty blood in their veins and meat on their bones. You don’t see what’s going to happen if this Initiative succeeds?”
He could see it on my face: the doubt was creeping in. He grinned, retracting his blade and patting me on the shoulder. “One kid. That’s all I need. I just need to get one alone. But they’re too smart for that. Always travel in packs. Sleep in that bunker down the mountain. But you? For you, it’d be trivial…”
As if on cue, there was a small knock on the door.
A big grin crossed over Saladin’s face. He held a finger to his lips as he melted through the slats of my closet, disappearing into the darkness just before my door went swinging open. There stood Katie, eyes low.
She didn’t seem to notice the sweat on my brow, the drop of blood on my neck, or the stupefied expression on her face. Her gaze was on the floor, nervous, as she sat across from me. “Mister Vermeil? I was thinking, and… I know I said I’m not supposed to tell you certain stuff about the school and all. But… I think you deserve to hear it, you know? Just don’t tell the headmistress what I told you, okay?”
My throat felt dry. I could hardly think. Saladin’s words echoed in my head: just one child. But seeing Katie’s face reminded me that I didn’t need to pick sides in some war I didn’t understand. Sitting across from me was a child I’d been tasked with protecting. That was all I needed to know. “Th… th-thank you, Katie, but I really think y-you should go… play with your friends, or…”
“It’s really no trouble! I dunno why she wants to keep so many secrets from you anyway. It’s not like you won’t figure it out, sooner or later…”
She didn’t notice the droplets of liquid meat that were Saladin blowing in behind her like raindrops caught in a heavy wind. By the time flesh and sinew reformed itself over her face to muffle her scream, he’d already had her ensnared. It was like an anaconda coiling around its prey, the way those ropes of tendrilled, bubbling flesh entwined themselves around her, and Saladin’s face emerged from those slivers of meat.
“Little miss… Katie, isn’t it? Must be my lucky day. Your mother is a busy woman, you know. My client lost every single little person he loved to that thirst of hers.”
He was drawing something from his throat — some kind of black dagger, pulling it up like a sword swallower. I don’t know, I wasn’t paying attention. I’d leapt into action the moment he was occupied. Maybe all those horror movies paid off, after all. If there was anything they taught me, it’s that any creature built of constantly morphing flesh always had the same weakness: fire.
All it took from my desk was a half-empty can of deodorant and my dad’s old lighter. I plied my makeshift flamethrower to whatever part of that oozing, fleshy mass looked the most exposed, pink and vulnerable. The heat and size of the erupting flames surprised even myself.
He squealed like a stuck pig through unnatural vocal chords, and a tendril of flesh batted me across the room like I was weightless. But it’d worked. Whatever parts of him the flames had touched were left bubbling and frothing, gooey and viscous like melted wax. But as he thrashed and whined, Katie seized the moment and let out her tongue.
No, not a tongue. It was a proboscis. A long black, spiral tube, like you’d see on a butterfly. She’d tried to jab it into his neck, but he’d jerked his head at the last moment, and it ended up somewhere far worse: pierced through his eye.
I thought the formless flesh that was Saladin was terrifying enough. But it was more terrifying still to watch it fade away, to see that flesh turn pale and veins wither like dying vines over taut, throbbing muscles. I realized she was sucking his blood through that proboscis like it was a drinking straw, and whatever other life essence flowed through the thing that was once a man. In seconds, his eyes and cheeks sunk in his face, like he was aging decades. I could only imagine what that proboscis would do to an ordinary human like myself.
She was an inexperienced hunter. Saladin, wailing now, managed to worm his way out of her grip before the job was done. He took off through the window, seeming to evaporate as he smashed through the glass, letting the wind carry off those droplets of meat and empty veins as he scattered himself to the breeze.
And yet again, another horror had gone as quickly as it’d come.
Katie pounced on me. I’d cried out for a moment, assuming she meant to turn that proboscis on me. But instead, she wrapped me in a hug. “Mister Vermeil! You saved me! I know that we could trust you! Ooh, you’re the best teacher ever!” I hugged her back just as the headmistress and the hounds from security came kicking down the door, and found an office covered in bubbling viscera.
I told the headmistress everything. In retrospect, I was shockingly honest. She was just as stoic as always through most of it, but the mention of the word ‘Saladin’ inspired a look of horror I’d never seen in her before. “Him? No. He couldn’t have found us,” she whispered to herself, cupping a hand over her mouth.
I’m laying in the infirmary now, being cared for by a nurse with a third eye and no interest in hiding it. That would have horrified me before. Now, I just cracked a smile. For better or worse, I’ve picked my side.
I’m sticking by these kids, even if it leads me straight into Hell.

I am 7 weeks postpartum. I love breast feeding my baby but I feel like it’s taking a toll on my body in ways I did not expect. My back and shoulders are so achy, it’s like I can not figure out how to maintain a good posture and position my baby in a way that she can latch. Perhaps this just comes with more practice but if anyone has advice or resources or can just relate I would love to hear about it… I also feel like on top of the physical strain from carrying or holding a baby, the tenderness in my breasts that is always fluctuating between nursing sessions is causing me to slouch more.. like I swear the muscles in my chest are all tighter from all the changes… Has anyone found something to help?

“Lindsey and Wesly sittin’ in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G!”
“Leigh, are you seriously four years old?” I hollered back at my sister who was walking nearly a block behind us. When I told her was I bringing my new girlfriend home to meet the family, she very sweetly told me that she would stifle her own trip so we could be alone.
“You don't have to do that,” I had told her, “I'm sure Lindsey wouldn't mind walking with you too. She likes you a lot.”
“Nah, it's good. You'll need plenty of time to prep her for Mom and Dad, anyway. Besides, I’ll just stand really far back and tease you guys the whole way.”
To be fair, I guess she had warned me.
Lindsey just laughed at Leigh’s obnoxious mocking, “Your sister is hilarious. I am so looking forward to meeting the rest of your family. Are they as crazy as you two?”
I didn't quite join the amusement Lindsey had in her statement, but I did my best to fake it, “Yeah, something like that… Just um, keep in mind what I told you. Especially about my Dad…”
The girl rolled her eyes and hugged herself against me, “Oh, calm down. I just wanna’ talk with them a few minutes! 15, tops. Then we can go hide in your room and watch a movie all by ourselves.”
Lindsey leaned her head closer, but I hadn’t noticed, still too caught in my own thoughts. Finally, she let out a huffy, “ah-heemmm?”
I looked over to see her puckering her lips, a pouty look on her face from being ignored. I chuckled at how cute she was when she pulled her bratty attitude before slowing so I could kiss her back. Leigh let out a loud “Ooooooooooo!” far behind us.
I was about to turn and throw daggers all the way down the block when I heard a door slam behind us, followed by the sound of rapid footsteps on pavement. I spun around just in time to see my neighbor Valentine flying down her lawn, not looking where she was going while she tried to wrestle a hairband loose from her arm. She finally turned her attention back forward just in time to avoid slamming into us full force.
“Oh, shoot—Sorry!” she quickly said, back stepping away from Lindsey and I. When she saw it was me, her face lit up, “Oh, hey, Wes! Sorry to almost plow you over.” Her eyes fixed on the girl next to me, and she politely smiled, “Oh, hi! You’re… Lindsey, right? I think we had Chem together last year, yeah?”
Lindsey put on her friendliest face, “Oh my gosh, yeah! I’m sorry; I’m so bad with names—remind me again, you are…?”
“Valentine.” The girl said, snapping her flowy hair up into a ponytail before extending a hand, “Nice to officially re-meet you?”
My stomach admittedly had felt a little warm standing before my old friend again. Getting to hear her talk and seeing her actually do so without being rushed in the other direction was nice. It was something I had missed…
Not wanting the moment to end quite yet, I tried to milk a few more words from her, knowing I hadn’t much time, “Where are you off to in such a hurry?”
“Oh, to volleyball practice. My mom needed me to stop home real quick, though. Minor emergency.” Val nervously chuckled, “What are you two up to? I didn’t realize you were friends!”
Lindsey smiled a little showier than usual, “Oh, well, we’re a little more than friends…” she said, turning to prompt me.
“Um, yeah,” I laughed softly, feeling a slight awkwardness in my stomach. “We’ve been dating for a few months.” I don't know why it felt so strange to say it to Valentine. She was only a friend, after all.
Val’s eyes widened, “Oh, duh! I’m sorry—I should have figured! You two are really cute together!” she declared. The girl playfully nudged my arm with her fist and said, "Look at you, Wesly; finally putting yourself out there!”
Growing up alongside Val, this was the first time that she’d ever seen me date someone; at least seriously. Of course, there were those little pretend relationships one has in middle school, back when you think you know what love is only because you’ve read it in books and seen it in movies. Even so, the only one of those I ever had was with a girl named Evonne Shrader, and that was only because Val and our other friend, Claireese, told me she had a crush on me. I felt bad that I didn’t feel the same, but didn’t want to hurt her feelings, so I went along with it for about a week before deciding that dating wasn’t really my thing. At least, not with Evonne…
The truth was, I didn’t really feel romantic toward most girls. Maybe that was a side effect of growing up with my only education on the topic being my parents' broken example. If I’m being honest, though, I already felt like I had everything I needed. Most of my time was spent with Valentine and Claire, and in a lot of ways, I almost viewed them as my relationship. I’d always be there for them if they needed anything, I always wanted to spend my free time with them, and above all, I loved them both with all my heart, and I knew that was never going to change. Despite this, part of me always craved that passionate spark that came with a true romantic partner. The physical connection of a kiss or the gentle hold of a lover's embrace. I tried to keep that aspect away from the girls, but admittedly, sometimes those feelings would slip up through the cracks.
It’s sort of hard that way; growing up as a boy when all your friends are women. You’re around them so often and spend so much time together that your brain always wonders, ‘Huh, why haven’t we?’. I always kept myself restrained, however. Having someone always meant you ran the risk of losing them if it didn’t work out. I couldn’t bear that with either Val or Claireese, and like I said, with what I saw between my parents, I grew up thinking that was the highest likelihood. Still, sometimes it was hard. I’d feel it strong when Val and I would walk home alone together, and I’d hug her goodbye on her porch… Or when I’d be alone with Claireese at the park just sitting and laughing with her… As I got older, the feelings got easier to suppress with maturity, though, as well as the unfortunate distance growing between all of us. But still, sometimes, it was hard.
“Well, we probably shouldn’t keep you then if you're heading for practice!” Lindsey said, eyeing Val as the girl pulled back from me, “We didn’t mean to slow you down; wouldn’t want to make you late!” Her tone was laden with concern, but I couldn’t help but feel it was disingenuous.
Lindsey was a bit of a jealous type and didn’t like when I talked to any girl other than my own sister. We had gotten in a bit of a fight one time when she saw me catching up with Claireese once, and that was just me stopped in the hallway for a few moments. I didn’t blame her at all; I understood. And I’m sure standing there in that moment, seeing the pretty ‘girl-next-door’s’ athletic figure in her spandex shorts and tight t-shirt was raising a lot of red flags in her mind. Despite being glad to see Val again, I didn’t want Lindsey to be uncomfortable or think I was disloyal, so I didn’t push her for any more words.
Luckily, Val didn’t try to either, “Yeah, I really should get going if I wanna’ be there on time. Cool running into you guys though! Have a fun night!” She waved over her shoulder, finally employing her famous talk and walk method. I saw her stop a bit down the road to say hi when she encountered Leigh, and once she was out of earshot, Lindsey stared at her while asking, “That’s not someone I should worry about, is it?”
I watched Val hug my sister, and from so far away could hear her laugh fill the air. God, I missed that sound…
I drew in a deep breath and silently released it while shaking my head, “Nah, not at all, don’t worry. We barely even talk anymore…”
My parents were more well behaved than I expected them to be. In my mother’s typical fashion, she bombarded Lindsey with a million questions about her life and wanted to know every detail about the poor girl. Meanwhile, my dad stood nearby cracking eye rolling jokes the whole time and occasionally tossing in a question of his own if he felt the need. They were both more than welcoming, though, and my father managed to not let slip any uncomfortable comments or intense remarks. By the time we finally hit a gap in my mom’s friendly interrogation and I was able to pull Lindsey and I away to the privacy of my room, it had been a little over an hour, far longer than my girlfriend had promised. Despite my guardians exceeding my expectations, I felt a bit of relief when we went away and started up to my room, knowing that we didn’t risk stepping on any hidden mines anymore.
“I don’t get what you were so worried about! Your parents are great.” Lindsey said softly in my ear as I reached the upstairs hall.
I tried not to let the comment get under my skin. It always sort of bothered me when people acted like I was just ‘making stuff up’ when I cautioned them about how intense my parents can be. Val and Claireese did it to Leigh and I a lot, too. I suppose I couldn’t blame them, though. It’s not like they knew what went on behind closed doors. How loud my father could scream. How powerfully my tiny mother could retaliate. Nobody knew about the graveyard of broken china or that scars that Leigh and I bore from our father’s more egregious sins… All they saw was what they got when they came over, and that was smiles and kindness. I’m sure it was better that way. How do you even begin to explain to someone that your parent is abusive, but you still love them? I never knew, at least…
Lindsey hopped on my bed beside me, and we surfed through the different movie sites on my TV before finally settling on one. An old campy classic that we both had already seen, but just wanted to re-live. While the opening credits rolled, I tried to banish all the nerves and complicated thoughts that had been running through my head all day and just enjoy my time with the girl I loved. She lay against my chest, and I leaned back on one arm while caressing her waist with the other, just feeling her warmth against me and tuning out the film in favor of the sound of her slow, gentle breathing. It was such a lovely sound. It made my heartbeat slow, and my muscles relax. Her sweet scent filled my nostrils, demanding that I think of her, and only her, and I happily obliged. I was at peace, just being with her, not having to worry about the outside world for a bit. Knowing that despite drifting apart from the people closest to me, I at least found one person who I knew still cared…
I squeezed Lindsey closer at the thought, so happy I found her at such a low point in my life. I gently planted my lips on her head, breathing deep her pheromones, then gently traced the small of her back with my fingers. She pulled away at the sudden affection, batting her dazzling pools at me with an adoring look before turning them to stare at my lips and leaning forward. I let my own meet hers in the middle and pulled her closer, to which she adjusted her own grip and kissed me again and again. Content with the amount of affection, I pulled away and smiled at her, but the girl apparently wasn’t finished yet.
She darted forward again, taking my flesh against hers once more, slipping a leg on top of my own to intertwine. Our mouths parted and relocked rhythmically, Lindsey’s pillowy lips the prefect pressure against my own. Like slipping into sleep, the movie faded slowly into the background as everything about the girl took up my attention. This was all I needed. Just pure, unadulterated love. The warm, giddy feeling of adoring someone so perfect, and knowing they adore you. It was heavenly and peaceful like that for a while, and I felt all of my stress melting away.
And then, Lindsey began to drag her leg slowly up and down my jeans, tracing her foot against my calf.
She kissed me a little harder—a little faster, compelling me to do the same. I didn’t have any qualms with it; I was always willing to give the girl the full passion she deserves. My hand slipped gently across her cheek and neck, my thumb slightly stroking the spot just behind her jaw. With gentle, controlled strength, I pressed her head a little tighter to mine, trying to be as closely connected to her as possible.
Lindsey’s leg rubbed a little harder. A little faster. Her tongue slipped further between my lips, and the girls hands slid down my chest to find the edge of my shirt.
The shock of her frigid hands against my stomach snapped me back to the moment, and the scene melted back into place. I pulled my lips from her and let a small, amused huff out of my nose.
“Lindsey, Leigh is right next door…. My parents are downstairs…” I said with a smile, my lips hovering before hers.
“So?” she whispered, leaning in to steal a few more pecks, “We can be quiet.” She raised her hands more, taking my shirt with it, but I released one of my own to stop her.
“Lindsey,” I laughed softly, trying to seem as loving as possible, “I don’t think I want to do that right now. Can’t we just watch the movie? Just be here together?”
Lindsey’s smile faltered as she furrowed her brow and snickered, “You kissed me first; I thought you were trying to lead into this.”
“Y-Yeah, I just wanted to kiss you a bit. Just sort of… take you in…”
She smirked and flirtatiously glazed her eyes, “Then take me in.” I felt her hands try to raise my shirt again as she went for another round of kisses.
“Lindsey…” I said, a little sterner this time, but still with a smile, “I just don’t think now is a good idea…”
Her own smirk disappeared, “Wes, what’s the big deal? We do this all the time.”
“No, I know, but… Like I said, my family might hear and…” I hesitated, “I just… I feel like this is all we ever do, y’know? We never just chill with each other anymore. I feel like it only ever ends in sex.”
“Do you… not want to have sex anymore?” Lindsey asked, confused.
“N-No,” I said, trying to backpedal so as to not lose her. I threw in a few more kisses that left her lips and danced all over her face for good measure, then pulled away and slowly slid a hand over her long, slender leg “You know I’m always down to make these babies all wobbly,” I teased, hoping the small joke would soften her up. It seemed to work as she rolled her eyes and smirked. “It’s just… Sometimes I miss when we could just sit and talk, you know? Just be in each other’s company and enjoy it?”
“That was back before I knew I was allowed to fuck you,” Lindsey smiled, trying to downplay my concern. She leaned in close to my lips so that her breath teased my skin, “Now I’ve gotta take advantage of every chance I get.”
The girl’s hand wanders down to my belt and begins to fumble it, but I try one last time, “Linds… I’m serious.”
The promiscuous joy melts from Lindsey’s face, and she stares at me for a moment. The feeling of having messed up was physically evident to me. I could sense the tension that I’d created in the room with my apprehension, and I desperately wished I could wind it back a few moments and change it. I knew if I said ‘Never mind, let’s actually bang after all’, it would have just come off as pathetic, which is how Lindsey was already looking at me, so I just stared at her and waited for a response.
She finally spoke after what felt like an eternity; plainly. Curtly.
“Alright. Let’s just watch this then.”
She laid back against the bed, still allowing her waist to be cradled in my arm, but she didn’t let her head fall back to my chest. I continued to stare at her, hoping she’d look back and see my desperate expression and know I was sorry, but she never did. She got on her phone a lot after that, checking it and scrolling through her social media accounts. I tried a few times to make light conversation, hoping I could ease us back into normalcy, but it wasn’t working. Finally, before the movie was even over, Lindsey clicked on the screen of her phone, making a big show of checking the time, then sighed.
“I should probably get home. I have a lot of homework I need to get done.”
“Lindsey…”
She furrowed her brow and tilted her head, “What?”
“I’m sorry… Please don’t go…”
She let out a clearly canned snicker, “Wes, what are you talking about? I just have homework; I’m not upset about anything. If you don’t want to have sex, we don’t need to have sex. I’m not going to force you.”
I stared at her and pursed my lips. Her mind was made up, she was going to leave no matter how much I begged. I knew there was only one thing that would make her stay…
I slid a hand to her cheek and caressed it, then leaned in. Lindsey shied away and put up a hand to shove mine away from her neck, “Wes, I’m fine, seriously, you don’t need to act—”
I ignored her and gripped her more sternly, yanking her close and forcing my lips against hers. The violent show of passion was enough to elicit a shocked gasp through her nose as her lips latched onto mine, and eventually, her tensed body melted in my arms as she gave in to the kiss. I pulled her tighter and ran my hand up her leg again, this time pulling her closer by the rear, causing her to excitedly hook a leg on me again.
I felt her lips smile against mine as she pulled away to whisper, “You don’t have to do this if you don’t want.”
My eyes opened and looked into hers, expectantly looking back at me. They were so pretty. So hard to resist…
“I want to.” I told her.
Then I went back in for more.
This time, when she began to rub her leg against my groin, I let her. When she slipped her tongue between my lips, I let her do that too. I allowed my shirt to make it all the way off this time, and I made sure to give hers the same treatment before setting to work, kissing down her neck and shoulder.
Soon, ecstasy filled gasps sang in my ears, softly stifled so no one in the house would notice. Lindsey was certainly enjoying herself, but I was just focused on her. Pleasing her. Making sure she knew how much I loved her. It was the same dance we’d done almost every night for the past three months, and by now, I figured she had to know how much I cared. So why did it still feel like I wasn’t doing enough?
‘You’re probably just over thinking things. Lindsey loves us.’
That had to be right. If she didn’t… why else would she stay with me?

~

My head jolts up from Val’s lap, feeling the sudden jostle of the vehicle we ride in. I feel the machine slowing to halt, and yet, the rumbling continues. Looking around the truck, I can tell by everyone’s faces that we aren’t in any immediate danger, but their confused expressions tell me that may not be a certainty. I look out the window at what little light now exists from a distant sun and see that the trees around us seem to be swaying more than usual. No, not swaying; they're shaking too. Their branches vibrate violently, showering pine needles and leaves onto the roof of the truck. In the front, Eight has drawn our carriage to a halt, and Thirteen is on high alert, scanning the wind shield for any signs of a threat. We stay like that for nearly a minute before the rumbling slowly draws its final breath, and all is still once more.
“What… the hell was that?” asks Paul.
“It felt like an earthquake.” Myra remarks.
Tom pulls Lyle close to his side, pivoting his head to see out the window behind himself, “Or something big heading our way.”
That causes Eight to crank the brake off and start the vehicle forward again, “Well, whatever it was, it’s gone now, and I don’t wanna stick around here in case it happens again.”
Nobody has any arguments with that. Soon we’re back to gliding across the vacant stretch of asphalt, humming along in silence, and once we seem in the clear again, Val lays me down once more to sleep a bit longer. I don’t fight her. We’ll be to Seattle soon, and I want to be rested as much as possible when we get there. Allowing myself to relax under her touch, I fade back into old, sour memories once more, clinging tight to the sweet parts that I know will help guide me back to sleep.
{Next Chapter}

Hello day 6 of left Achilles rupture. My MRI didn’t say any gap but I have a full thickness tear at the Myotendinous Junction which is attached to my calf so my doctor said it wouldn’t make sense for surgery since the tendon would only be sutured to the muscle and not to another part of the tendon.
Not sure if I’m just being neurotic but I don’t feel like the 2 wedges in my air walker boot are making me plantarflexion any different or more aggressively as if I wasn’t wearing a boot while lying or sitting down. Also I don’t have that full ROM of going downward to do a tip toe like a ballerina if I tried on my left foot but I can on my good foot. The lying of my leg straight also causes discomfort on my calf and since my tear particularly impacted my calf muscle should I be concerned about how I rest my leg? I hope I’m not doing this incorrectly and causing my tendon to elongate so early into my healing.
Anyway have similar rupture and/or share these concerns? Appreciate any advice and help, thanks!

I know this seems like peanuts compared to what I've seen in the thread so bare with me.
This past Saturday I was getting the pizza delivery at the door and coming back inside there is a step you need to get up before coming in. I grabbed the pizza and then on my way back in I guess i didnt move fast enough and caught the metal storm door on my achilles tendon. I removed my foot from between the door frame and the screen door and stood there for a moment and said some choice words then moved on. Later my fiance notices I'm bleeding everywhere and I look down and I have a gash on my heel. It looked narly but it also just pulled the skin like a fillet so we just rinsed it really good and then put the bandaid really tight on my heel to suck the skin back in. Stayed off it the rest of the night and when I woke up the next morning. I couldn't walk. Fiance helped hobble me around and put my foot up. It was swollen the size of a baseball. I've had sports injuries before on my feet so I know they swell pretty bad. Well Monday it swole worse and I just brushed it off, worked from home and have been every day. I still have some range of motion and swelling but it's not nearly as bad as it was on sun/monday. However now all the swelling is near the back of my foot. I said ok time for the doctor. My normal doctor didn't have any openings and so I went to one of the nurse practioner in the office to at least take a look at it. Front office assured me if it was out of the realm for the NP that they would bring a doctor in and its really common for these types of things to be handled by them.
I was in the office all of 15 min. She looked at the swelling, bruising, cut and then walked up the tendon with her fingers pressing in and me saying ouch over and over. Said well you definitely have an achilles injury. (Obviously, there's a 1 inch gash on my the back of my heel that you can literally see) I asked if it was completely torn. she had me wiggle my toes and if I could lift the foot up at all.
I have some range of motion and said it's not completely tore. If it's got a partial tear in it then we can only really know that by an MRI. So if it still hurts and you are having major issues with it go to an Orthopedic clinic to have it checked out in a few weeks. Limit mobility by not fully walking on it ( surely didn't offer a boot) even though that's the position she told me to keep it in and sent me on my way.
I feel like I was rushed out the room with literally zero testing done. She didnt do the lie on your stomach and check reflexes.(Thompson test?) Zero nada. Just walked her finger down the tendon along the back of my leg while sitting up and mainly looked at the cut on my foot and was asking what I used to clean it and if I looked at it when it happened to see how deep it was. I can't do blood so I had my fiance bandage it for me. I never looked at it open
I get home and finish my day off remotely working. I get up to hobble over to let my dog out and I felt a pinch in my calf for about 10 seconds and then dull ache ever since. My foot has felt weird every since. Should I make another doctors appointment woth my PCP?

Do cows dry up when they're pregnant?
Do you still have to milk cows that have nursing calves? I would think that we've bred cows to give way more milk than 1 calf could drink. How much can a calf drink?
How old are calves when they're weaned?

Superman #96 - Zod, Baby

<< < > Coming June 1st
Author: MajorParadox
Book: Superman
Arc: Heritage
Set: 96

Line of Fire

Metropolis General Hospital
“Kal-El!” Zod yelled from the parking lot, scanning the hospital building until their eyes met.
“Don’t,” said Clark just before Zod launched toward him, smashing through the window to Lois’ hospital room.
Clark grabbed Zod’s arms to veer his trajectory from hitting anyone on his way through, but it caused them both to fly through the wall into the next room.
Lois and her nurse, Linda were okay. Clark didn’t leave them out of his field of vision as he tried to get the area clear.
“We don’t have to do this,” said Clark, muffled as Zod wrapped his arms around his neck. Clark swung his head back into Zod’s nose, but it didn’t loosen his grip.
Alarms started blaring. Someone must have hit the fire alarm.
“Somebody’s going to get hurt,” Clark pleaded.
“You’re right,” Zod agreed, tightening his grip.
The Man of Steel flew backward, sending the pair crashing into the wall behind them. With Zod’s grip loosened, Clark took his arm and flipped him over to the ground, pinning him down.
But he didn’t stay down long. Zod flew up toward the ceiling crashing through to the next floor. He tossed Clark away and fired off a beam of heat vision that kept Clark from recovering. Clark lifted his arms to direct the blasts away from his chest and returned with a heat vision blast of his own, finally throwing the Phantom Zone escapee off balance.
The opening didn’t last long. Clark tried to get closer, desperate to get a hold of Zod and move the fight away from the hospital. But Zod didn’t let it happen. Instead, he let a punch fly, sending Clark through several more walls.
Clark pulled himself up, keeping an eye on Lois’ room. They were wheeling her bed out to the hall quickly slowed by all the other patients being evacuated. He moved his attention back to Zod who was looking back toward Lois too.
“No,” said Clark to himself, realizing his attacker was more attentive than he thought.
“You were in the room with that one earlier,” said Zod from the other room. “She must mean something to you.”
Zod crashed back down through walls and ceiling to the hallway and zoomed in front of Lois’ bed.
“Can I help you?” asked Lois dryly, after the initial shock left her.
Linda tried to wheel the bed back the way they came, but Zod grabbed hold of it, keeping it in place.
“You are with child,” he said.
“Nothing gets by you,” said Lois, her arms on her stomach. “Must be those supersenses, huh?”
“I can see why he likes you,” Zod smiled. “You are fearless.” His eyes started heating up and Lois’ heart jumped a beat.
“Stay away from her!” yelled Clark as he grabbed Zod and flew him down the hall.
Zod managed to break free before Clark could get him outside.
Finally having a moment free, Clark tapped his belt. “Superman to–”
But Zod quickly destroyed the belt communication with a narrow burst of heat vision.
“No calling for help,” he said, motioning back in Lois’ direction. “That wouldn’t be your child the human is carrying, would it?” he asked. “Perhaps I should send them both to the Phantom Zone so you could understand how it feels.”
“I do understand,” said Clark, listening to his wife enter the elevator. “I never would have sent your son back there if he could survive out here. And I’ve never stopped looking for a cure or somewhere for your people to live free from that hellscape.”
“My people?” Zod repeated, gritting his teeth. “They are our people. They may not be Kryptonian, but we’re all of the same origin.“
“Maybe I misspoke,” said Clark. “But the point stands.”
Zod stepped closer. “You could have released them here on this planet.”
“We tried,” Clark answered. “But it’s not my decision to make.”
“That’s where you’re wrong, Kal-El,” said Zod, firing off heat vision again. “Like your father on Krypton, you let them decide when it was within your powers to decide for yourself.”
Fortress of Solitude, North Pole
Kelex’s visor booted up in a vivid blue. His startup diagnostics began as he tried to recall what happened before he was deactivated.
Memories flooded back of Jax-Ur escaping the Phantom Zone through Jor-El’s hologram. The escapee took control of the fortress and deactivated him and the other robots.
Kelex finished his diagnostics and ran a scan of the fortress operations. Jax-Ur still appeared to be active, but his access was severely limited. The failsafe from Watchtower must have been activated, which also explained how he could power back up. Kal-El and Kara had ensured Kelex worked as another failsafe during any intrusions.
Jax-Ur was still a threat so Kelex made sure not to draw attention. Instead, he monitored the intruder, who was trying to narrow down the source of the lockout. That not ideal. If Jax-Ur successfully traced it to Watchtower, anyone up there could be in danger and Kelex could lose control again.
Metropolis General Hospital Elevator
“Don’t worry, Lois,” said Linda, catching her breath. “We’ll make it out of here.”
The building kept shaking as the two Kryptonians were locked in battle. Lois knew Clark’s first instinct would be to move him away, so the fact they were still there didn’t bode well.
Lois’ eyes moved to the elevator readout, indicating they had three more flights down to the lobby. But then red energy cut through and sliced up the top half of the carriage.
“Hold on!” yelled Linda as the elevator shook in place. Luckily the emergency locks kept them from falling.
Lois pulled herself off the bed with an exhale of desperation.
“Lois–” Linda warned.
“We can’t stay here,” said Lois, trying to pull the door apart.
Linda grabbed Lois’ IV pole and stuck it in the elevator’s crevice, using leverage to pry the doors open.
Lois gave a thumbs up and reached for the floor, which didn’t quite line up with the elevator. They would have to climb. “Give me a boost, will you?”
As Linda kneeled, Lois felt a surge of pain that made her legs go numb.
“You’re having another contraction,” Linda said, helping her patient down.
Lois tried to make a sarcastic remark about the situation, but all she could do was hold onto Linda’s hand and yell.
Elsewhere Inside
Clark heard Lois yelling as he blocked a punch by Zod, but the general kicked out a knee and slammed his elbow over the Man of Steel’s head. He was lifted and tossed through a glass window.
Before Zod could move in for another hit, Clark shot back up and blasted freeze breath, which Zod quickly avoided, but the move left him open to a flying punch to the chest. Clark dropped down with an elbow to Zod’s face and grabbed him by the arms, swinging him around until the general went flying through a nearby window.
Finally, he got the fight outside. He needeed to keep the momentum going, Clark couldn’t leave Lois yet. He turned toward the elevator but found Lois and her nurse had managed their escape on their own.
“Resourceful as always,” Clark said under his breath, moving as quickly as he could outside.
“Stand down!” yelled Maggie Sawyer from the street.
The SCU had arrived, and several vans were parked out front. Several office had rifles aimed upward at Zod while a few mech battlesuits exited the other vans.
Clark had read about their new tech but hadn’t seen it in action yet. Hopefully, they could withstand the likes of Zod.
Zod couldn’t help but let a smile cross his faith, even for a moment. That wasn’t a good sign.
The general dove down and the SCU opened fire, but he quickly dodged their shots. Clark dropped down after him.
Hopefully the added firepower would help him get Zod away.

Not According to Plan

Fortress of Solitude, North Pole
—
Kelex approached Jax-Ur slowly, falling to the ground intermittently. He didn’t want the intruder to realize he was functional again. But time was running out. The sooner Jax found the source of the fortress failsafe, the sooner General Zod could free more reinforcements from the Phantom Zone.
“Watchtower,” Jax said to himself aloud, reading through some files. “That robot mentioned it before… Whatever it is caused the disruption.”
Scratch that, perhaps time was already up.
Kelex raised himself again and floated quickly toward Jax’s hologram.
Jax saw the incoming robot and didn’t waste a moment.
“General,” Jax called into Zod’s communication system. “I found the source of the interference. It–“
Kelex reached him and waved his robotic hand through the holographic light. A surge of electricity sparked as Jax finished his statement: ”Is coming from a satellite around the planet.“
Jax’s hologram fizzled with static and morphed back into a depiction of Kal-El’s birth father Jor-El.
“Good job, Kelex,” said Jor-El. “I’m finally free from Jax-Ur’s influence. The threat is over.”
“Maybe one threat is over,” said Kelex.”But if Jax’s full message reached General Zod, Watchtower may be in danger.”
Metropolis
Minutes Earlier
Zod blew a gust of wind toward the SCU officers as he flew down toward them. A few of them went flying, while others managed to hold their ground by taking cover.
The mech suits approached, firing more powerful blasts than the traditional SCU rifles. Zod tried to avoid those too, but one of them hit him in the arm, interrupting his path.
Clark caught up, making contac with Zod, but the general spun around and hit him with heat vision, followed by a punch to the stomach.
Zod adjusted his course and moved back down toward the mech suits, delivering powerful blows to each before any of them could react.
Clark hoped Zod wasn’t going for blood, or at least the armor protected them enough to prevent permanent damage. Either way, he had to stop his onslaught against them and move him toward that abandoned office building where he fought Metallo and the S.T.A.R. Labs escapees. They had kryptonite there and it could come in handy.
“Leave them alone,” Clark ordered as he flew back to Zod to kick him away.
“You should be working with me, Kal-El!” Zod yelled. “But all you do is fight against the best interests of our people! Maybe you didn’t mispeak before. My people.”
“It’s true,” Clark started. “I used to have a hard time connecting with my heritage. But the closer I got to my cousin. And the more I learned in the Fortress from my birth parents–æ
“You can’t connect to holograms,” Zod interjected.
“You’re right,” Clark agreed. “Even though I do see them as real people, it’s not quite the same as meeting them before they died. But I do have memories of a whole other life where I grew up on Earth with my mother, Lara.” (See Superman #91). I’m still trying to make sense of that, but the connection was definitely there.
“It’s still not the same,” said Zod, jumping over, with a fist to Clark’s face. He kicked Clark away, landing beside one of the SCU vans.
Dan Turpin dropped down to help him up, aiming his rifle at the general.
“Try to draw him away from the building,” Clark told him. “I have a plan.”
“Hold on, Big Blue,” said Dan, reaching into his pocket. “Does your plan involve these, which we picked up from your last battle today?” He pulled out three small cylindrical containers and handed them over.
Clark couldn’t see through them, which indicated lead, perfect for transporting the kryptonite without it affecting him. “Thanks, Dan,” said Clark, taking them and stuffing them inside his belt.
He turned back toward Zod to find him hovering in place. A device was extended over his eyes and Clark could hear a voice speaking to him through it.
“I found the source of the interference,” said Jax-Ur on the other end.
“Oh no,” said Clark, speeding toward him as fast as he could.
Clark tried to fry the communication device with his heat vision, but Zod ducked and kicked Clark away.
The rest of the message played before Jax’s voice broke apart and Zod looked up into the sky. He quickly zeroed in on Watchtower’s location and disappeared from the area in a burst of speed.
Clark flew off after him.
Outside Hospital
Linda had managed to get Lois into a new bed, down to the lobby, and was rolling her into the ambulance bay. It was a crowded mess as the evacuation funneled patients into ambulances to get away from the disaster area.
“We have a woman in labor,” Linda called, trying to cut through.
“Over here,” a paramedic called, rushing over to help. “How far along?” he asked, wheeling the bed into the emergency vehicle.
“Hopefully not far enough to deliver the baby right here,” said Lois, before another contraction started.
“She’s almost fully dilated,” Linda explained.
“Better in an ambulance than in the middle of a superhero fight,” the paramedic in the driver’s seat said, as he rolled away, sirens blaring.
There were cracks in the road that didn’t look quite normal, but the driver didn’t think anything of them. A beam of red energy cut across the road, which revealed the source. The road was being cut into by stray heat vision.
The ground began shaking under the ambulance, rocking them back and forth as they drove.
“What’s happening?!” cried Lois.
The driver watched as the asphalt cracked ahead of them, trying to veer out of the way. “Hold on!” he yelled.
“Arghhhhhhhh!” cried Lois. “I’m trying! But you’re not making it any easier!”
One of the cracks widened and the road broke apart. The ambulance dropped down into a mini-sinkhole.

Arrival

Watchtower
Oliver Queen sat at a terminal, spinning an arrow in his hand. Dinah had told him there wasn’t much to Watchtower duty, but she didn’t say how boring it could be. Next time he’d try harder to convince her to join him up there. Together all alone together in space? The romance writes itself.
A beeping from the computer broke Ollie out of his daze.
“Don’t worry about it,’” he said, mimicking Dinah. “‘You won’t have to do anything.’”
Ollie tapped a button that was lighting up and a message appeared on the screen with a video feed outside the satellite. It showed a figure approaching while the message read, “Object detected, trajectory approaching.”
Someone was coming up the long way. Ollie figured he would skip the transporter too if he could fly. He looked closer but couldn’t quite make out who it was yet.
No green meant it wasn’t a Lantern or Martian Manhunter. No red or blue meant it wasn’t Superman. As the figure got closer, it was clearer he was a man wearing black.
“Batman?” Ollie asked aloud. He was sure the Dark Knight had to use transporters like the rest of the mere ‘mortals.’ But with Batman, you never really knew what to expect.
As the man reached the window, Ollie stood up and they met eyes.
Definitely not Batman. It was a man with black hair and a beard. And there was a silver Z-shape on his chest. The man pulled his arm back and Ollie’s heart jumped a beat.
The Z-man punched a hole through the glass and alarms started blaring as the oxygen rushed out. Ollie held onto the chair as the man entered and some emergency protocol was activated, blocking the windows with steel walls, and returning the room to a breathable state.
Ollie didn’t waste a minute and shot off an arrow that bounced right off the man’s shoulder.
“I am General Zod,” he said. “How do I disable the interference to the Fortress?”
“I’m going to assume that’s a bad idea,” said Ollie.
General Zod moved in close and grabbed the archer by the throat.
“Sorry, bud,” Ollie struggled, his voice hoarse. “It’s my first day. I wouldn’t know where to start.”
Zod dropped Ollie to the ground and studied the computer tech around them. “No matter,” he said, his eyes turning red. “I’ll take care of it myself.”
The computer started beeping again. That was a good sign. Someone else was probably approaching.
“That sounds like a way to go,” said Ollie, taking his time with each word. “But have you considered there could be a fail-safe if Watchtower gets destroyed?”
He had no idea if it was true, but it sounded logical enough.
Zod’s eyes returned to normal, but his face was still just as menacing. “If you’re toying with me–“ he started.
“Stand down, Zod,” said Clark from the entryway.
“Boy, are you a sight for sore eyes,” said Ollie, followed by a deep exhale.
Zod sped over to Clark, trying to grab a hold of him, but the Man of Steel sidestepped, letting a punch fly against the general. Clark reached toward his belt and tossed one of the metal containers toward Ollie.
“This should level the playing field,” Clark said, before getting a punch of his own across the face.
Ollie didn’t waste any time and opened his gift to find the green glow of kryptonite. “Oh boy,” he said, pulling an arrow from his quiver. He quickly affixed the kryptonite to the point, nocked the makeshift arrow, and let it fly, piercing Zod in the back.
The general barely flinched and continued his attack on Clark, who could feel the sting of the kryptonite too. It wouldn’t compare to how Zod felt, whether he showed it or not.
Clark dodged another hit from Zod and kicked him back against the chair. His response time was noticeably slowing, but Clark was feeling sluggish too as he fought through the pain.
“Down!” Ollie yelled as he fired off another arrow, which exploded as it made contact with Zod’s left shoulder.
The detonation sent Zod and Clark flying back in opposite directions.
“You okay, big guy?” asked Ollie, reaching his side.
“I will be when we get Zod contained,” said Clark, reaching for another container from his belt. He opened it up and pulled out the blue kryptonite.
“Whoa,” said Ollie, mesmerized by the glow. “What’s that do?”
“This will level the playing field even more,” Clark explained, jumping forward to Zod before he could rise to his feet. He let a punch fly and followed it up with a kick to the general’s stomach, but it caught in Zod’s arms.
“You’re full of surprises today, son of Jor-El,” he said as he flipped Clark over. “But I’m better than you in every way, powers or not.”
Ollie smiled and leaped into the fight, throwing punches of his own, which Zod blocked, but his retaliatory hits weren’t super-powered anymore. Superman wasn’t kidding about leveling the field.
“Stay down, General,” said Ollie as he finally connected a punch.
But Zod took the impact and returned with a slap across the face which sent Ollie to the ground. He proceeded toward Clark and kicked him down too. The blue k fell out of his hand and rolled to the other side of the room.
Ollie jumped back toward Zod, but he grabbed and tossed him away with such ease it indicated the blue kryptonite’s power-draining effects had worn off from that distance.
Clark was still too close, so he rushed over and bottled it up before Zod could fire a blast of heat vision toward him. A moment sooner and Clark’s skin would have been scorched.
Zod moved his heat vision toward Ollie, but Clark zoomed over, crashing Zod through the emergency covering of the windows. The impact pushed the green kryptonite arrow deeper into Zod’s back, causing him to lose his balance in the vacuum of space.
Clark used the distraction to repair the hole in Watchtower before Ollie could be sucked out. He turned back to Zod and grabbed hold, pulling him back toward the planet.
Ollie stood up, taking a deep breath, and said, “At least it didn’t stay boring up here.”
Near Metropolis General Hospital
“Lois, are you okay?” Linda asked, checking her vitals.
Lois coughed as the dust from the crash cleared. It was dark, except for some light gleaming from the back window. She was able to make out the two paramedics unconscious.
Before she could answer, she cried out in pain.
“This is it, Lois,” said Linda. “You’re going to have to start pushing.”
“Of course I am,” said Lois tensing up all her muscles.
Elsewhere in Metropolis
Moments Later
As they fell toward the planet, Clark grabbed hold of Zod and yanked the kryptonite arrow out of his back. Zod finally showed a painful reaction, but it was deafened by the vacuum of space. Clark tossed the kryptonite away and pushed on the speed toward Earth.
The closer they got, the more Zod resisted against Clark’s hold. That was a good sign. It meant what Clark had planned wouldn’t kill him. He held strong, aiming for an empty area near Metropolis General Hospital. His first instinct was to bring them back down as far away from civilization as possible, but he wanted to be as close to Lois as possible when it was over.
Between being in space and being exposed to kryptonite, Clark had lost sight and sound of his wife. Last he heard, she was being evacuated. He’d focus on finding her again as soon he was done with Zod.
Flames surrounded the two as they picked up speed on reentry. Clark held tight, making sure Zod would take the impact of their crash landing.
“You have promise,” said Zod, his voice less labored than Clark expected it’d be. “But you will never get the upper hand on me again.”
Zod shifted his weight and spun Clark around just before they collided with the ground below, the Man of Steel taking the brunt of the impact.
The two formed a crater as a loud bang echoed all around and clouds of dirt and debris went flying in all directions.
Zod stood over Clark, reaching down to his belt to grasp the one container Clark hadn’t tried t use yet.
“You’ve piqued my curiosity,” said Zod, examining it. “You went for blue and green kryptonite, but never once touched whatever’s in this one.”
“Don’t,” said Clark, straining all his muscles to get up.
But Zod opened it up, revealing a luminous red glow. The scowl on his face dropped as he felt a wave of relaxation flow through his entire body.
Clark had a different reaction. His mind went to one place. “Lois,” he said, scanning the city for any sign of her. His powers were still weakened, but he had to find her.
“I don’t understand,” said Zod. “What does this one do?”
Clark fought through the pain and finally made it to his feet. He hovered to get a better vantage point, but Zod grabbed his feet.
“No,” said Clark without even looking down. He took the last remaining container from his belt and popped it open, immediately dropping with it to the ground.
“You were right before,” said Zod, placing a hand on Clark’s shoulder. “We don’t have to fight. We can–”
Clark flipped around and stabbed the blue k into Zod’s shoulder, following it up with a kick to the stomach.
“I don’t have time for this,” said Clark, climbing out of the crater and running as fast as he could. Once he was far enough, he picked up into the air, finally zeroing in on Lois’ whereabouts. He disappeared in a burst of speed.
Zod got up and put a hand on the crystal stuck into his right arm.
“Don’t move!” a voice ordered from the top of the crater.
Several SCU members surrounded him with their rifles trained.
“It’s over,” said Dan. “You’re under arrest.”
Sinkhole
Clark dropped down to the sinkhole and ripped open the back doors to the ambulance, light flooding inside. “Lois!” he called. “I’ll get you back to the hospital!”
“It’s too late,” said Linda. “We’re pushing.”
Lois breathed heavily as Clark moved to her side. He watched Linda eye the paramedics.
“They’ll be okay,” said Clark after scanning them.
“Push!” Linda ordered.
Soon
Clark handed the newborn baby girl to Lois. Their daughter was wrapped in his cape.
“Congratulations, Lois,” said Linda, lying against the side of the truck with her hands over her head.
The paramedics had since woken up and were outside coordinating with emergency responders at the top of the sinkhole.
“Sorry your husband couldn’t be here,” Linda added.
Lois and Clark shared a smile.
“Does she have a name yet?” Linda asked.
“We–” Clark started before he caught himself. “We’d love to know,” he course-corrected.
“Clark and I went through a few options when we found out we were having a girl,” said Lois. “At one point we were even thinking we should name her after someone from my side of the family since we named our son after Clark’s father. But a name shouldn’t be a competition, it should be what’s right.”
Lois met Clark’s eyes and he nodded and Lois lifted the baby.
“Everyone, meet Lara Ella Kent.”
<< < > Coming June 1st

Hey folks, I've seen a few posts about difficulty and things recently, and wanted to give some loadout tips for playing on higher difficulties.
My Credentials

• I almost exclusively play Helldive - 9 difficulty with randoms, and don't mind dropping into one before anyone joins. I'm not an elitist, and think everyone should play on whatever difficulty they prefer, I just think 9 is the most fun*.
• I don't know the last time I failed a 40 minute Helldive mission with randoms.
• Also, not that this really matters, but I usually end up with the most kills on the team by a large margin (usually around 550-650 per 40 minute mission with 4 divers who have maybe 200-300 kills each). More on this later.
• I have played missions where everyone sticks together, 2 teams of 2, and 1 roamer with a team of 3 (I'm usually the roamer), I think they are all viable, and what to do really depends on the enemy types you face and the objectives.
• Most missions extract with a full-clear or close to it**

* I realize super samples are locked behind difficulty 7, so people "can't" play whatever difficulty they want, hopefully these loadouts can help with that. The reality is that super samples aren't likely to be the bottleneck long term, rares are.
**This usually doesn't happen if the initial drop ends up forcing a bad engagement. Smooth drops allow the team to take the fights when they are ready, don't be lazy about this, run the extra 100m to avoid dropping into a spore with stalkers and shriekers!
Some Caveats

• This post was written in patch 01.000.300 (quasar cooldown nerf patch).
• This post is mostly for 40 minute and blitz missions***, any of the defense or eradicate type missions could / should be a separate post.
• I'd also like to say that I'm not trying to tell you how to play the game, I think the "meta" should be whatever you have fun with. The real important thing is to have a balanced loadout if you are going into a game with randoms.
• I don't usually use voice chat in game, and coordinate by typing and pinging.

*** In blitz missions, I will usually run some variant of the second loadout, maybe with an orbital laser in strategem slot 3 if the team doesn't already have a couple.
The most important thing about bugs
The most dangerous enemies for bugs are the ones you can't outrun (Stalkers, Hunters, Pouncers). Hunters are also one of the more plentiful enemies in the game, so although having a high killcount isn't the main thing I go for in a game, I just treat every Hunter like a single hit from one is going to kill me (which it often precipitates), so I prioritize killing these enemies first in my loadouts. After that, you want to make sure to have stuff for the heavy armor (on this note, don't shoot Bile Titan sacs, I WANT them to spit, more on this later). For bugs, I exclusively use light armor, impact nades, and the stamina enhancement (unless someone else has it, then I go for muscle enhancement). Being mobile is the most important thing. If I kill everything faster than me, nothing can hit me; if nothing can hit me, I can't die.
Here's an example of a loadout you could use. I'll call it the "Closest to Meta Build"

• Primary: Breaker (for small and medium enemies)
• Secondary: Senator (for medium and small enemies)
• Strategem 1: Laser guard dog (for small enemies)
• Strategem 2: Orbital airburst strike (for small and medium enemies)
• Strategem 3: Any Rocket Launcher (for Chargers, Bile Titans, and structures)
• Strategem 4: 500K bomb (for Bile Titans, mainly)

Why I like it
Half of the slots are for getting rid of the things you can't outrun. Breaker is great at getting the small stuff, as well as just raw DPS-ing the medium stuff. The Laser Guard Dog also helps clear the trash around me, and is great for blasting me in the face on occasion letting me know if I'm getting flanked. The Orbital Airburst comes back on an almost perfect timer for breaches. Throw it into the middle of every breach you see and get 30-50 kills. The rocket launchers (I prefer Quasar and EAT to the Recoilless, but I think they are all fine now that you can refill all the rockets from a full ammo pack) can take out all the bug structures from afar, and are good for Heavy nests, where you just circle the outside and shoot the holes across the nest. Of course they are also for deleting chargers and 2 shotting bile titan foreheads (not the mouth, just above that). The 500 kilo is mainly for Bile Titans. Throw it between you and the titan, and bait the titan to spit. I think it ALWAYS kills if the bomb lands on them (even their leg), and often gets them when they take the blast to the face. It might take more than 1 if you miss. This is also the only airstrike I take because I want it to go on cooldown immediately after using both bombs. Maximum uptime is important. I hand these things out like candy to bile titans. I also don't hesitate to use them to clear nests and eggs. The faster you use them, the faster they are back. Basically if things aren't on cooldown, you aren't using them enough.
Where it struggles
I think this loadout can struggle with closing bug holes. It is also a bit weak to nursing / bile spewers. Armor with extra impact nades can help with both of those problems. More than a few heavies at a time can also be problematic if you are on your own. EAT is better for this to burst down a bunch of chargers. I did get a triple Bile Titan kill with a quasar shot because the 1st one ragdolled into the 2nd, which ragdolled into the 3rd. You can also bait them to be close enough for the 500K to take out multiple at a time, but it definitely has a tight radius.
Here is another balanced loadout for bugs: "Autocannon isn't just for automatons"

• Primary: Punisher (for small and medium enemies)
• Secondary: Redeemer (for small and medium enemies)
• Strategem 1: Autocannon (for medium and large enemies, as well as structures)
• Strategem 2: Orbital airburst strike (for small and medium enemies)
• Strategem 3: Orbital precision strike (good for just about everything)
• Strategem 4: 500K bomb (for Bile Titans, mainly)

Why I like it
Punisher knockback keeps the medium stuff off of you while you clear the small stuff (great for stalkers). Round reload means you are in the action faster. Autocannon can deal with almost everything, and is especially good for medium sized enemies, including nursing / bile spewers. Try not to use all the ammo in the Autocannon, so you get the fast reload. It's quick, even in the middle of a breach. Shoot at a leg of the charger after it misses the charge, for a 2-3 shot kill. Also, you can clear a heavy nest as fast as you can run around it. The orbital precision strike is good at clearing clumped up hordes of all armor levels. I usually throw it first against Bile Titans, and by the time the 500K goes on cooldown, the orbital precision is back up, or close to it.
Where it struggles
If you spend all the ammo loaded in the Autocannon, it can lead to some downtime where you have to disengage or get surrounded and die. The Punisher helps mitigate this a bit, but when there's lots of small stuff, it sometimes can't keep up. Dealing with chargers can also be a skill issue difficult sometimes, especially if there are multiple. Because you have to let them charge you (as opposed to the launchers, where you can kill them at a distance) it's easier to be overwhelmed.
Another one that's fun: "Turrets go brrrrrr"

• Primary: Sickle (for small and medium enemies)
• Secondary: Senator (for medium and small enemies)
• Strategem 1: Gatling turret (for small and medium enemies)
• Strategem 2: Autocannon / rocket turret (medium and large enemies)
• Strategem 3: Eagle airstrike (good for just about everything)
• Strategem 4: EAT (for immediately dropping chargers and titans)

Why I like it
Sickle is basically an infinite ammo machine gun with you to clear the trash. Senator helps with the medium stuff. The turret cooldowns are about the same as bug breaches, so you can have those available anytime you get one. Throw them off to the side a bit to pull aggro and not kill your team. Ideally they are on a rock. Also, the gatling protects the autocannon / rocket, and the autocannon / rocket protects the gatling. Set them up so they are unlikely to shoot one another. The EAT specifically is for the ability to delete Chargers and Bile Titans that might want to snack on your turrets. Waiting for the quasar to fire takes too long (as well as the cooldown), and the Recoiless reload also takes too long. I recommend calling in the EATS on cooldown so they are always available. Of course the Eagle airstrike can close holes, and clear patrols, in addition to kill Titans / Chargers. You can also find support weapons on the map to bring with you and use when not using EATs, as well as have teammates call down backpacks for you. It's like having 6 strategems at a time!
Where it struggles
This build can fall apart with bad turret placement (they have a ton of range, by the way), or just too many titans / chargers to deal with. The autocannon / rocket can hold off a charger or two on its own, but bile titan time to kill is a bit longer. Also the turrets like to shoot at anything they can see (did I mention they have a ton of range), so they are likely to aggro things you didn't necessarily want to aggro.
I could go on and list many more options

• Use the Eruptor as your bug hole closer / medium killing primary, and stalwart / machine gun / arc thrower as your primary option to deal with the small / medium stuff.
• I also think full eagles can be fun to just throw them at everything you see every 10 seconds and enjoy the relatively short re-arm time for everything.
• The grenade launcher with ammo backpack clears everything except titans and structures, and gives you basically infinite stims.

The key is that you can deal with anything the game throws at you. I definitely think a coordinated team has better options for loadouts in terms of both power and fun, and don't let these recommendations turn into what you always bring. You want to carry an autocannon with shield backpack? Go for it. Make those 10 shots count. I'm not going to stop you.
Jonathan H. Diver

And that was all on the smallest dose! I just got moved up a dose to .5. I’m still nauseous in the morning and throughout the day but usually some sugar free Gatorade will help. I’m actually struggling to get all my calories in that my nurse recommends (1300-1400) but wants me to stay around 50 carbs. 3 pounds of the 16 were muscle… oops. If anyone has any tips on how to get those extra calories lemme know. I’m drinking 2-3 protein shakes a day as well.

Really appreciate this sub for providing helpful information during my pregnancy, so would like to share my birth experience. Background: 30 yo FTM, never been admitted to the hospital before. Have extremely low pain tolerance. I'm a planner and always would like things to run my way, so the whole pregnancy journey itself is about me learning how to deal with uncertainty and the unexpected. Overall it's been low risk (except me having unexplained bleeding during the early 2nd trimester, and EIF on fetus' heart which went away by 30 weeks) and I felt mostly comfortable (gained ~16 lbs), but my anxiety level shot up as the due date was fastly approaching. I highly prefer to give birth vaginally as I'm so scared of C-section, but also afraid of contractions as well (what if epidural doesn't work for me??) It's supposed to be this Friday 5/3, but I gave birth last Thursday 4/25. It's not that bad as I originally anticipated, and I'm super grateful for my baby as he cooperated so nicely 😄
Timeline: Monday 4/22: 38w+3 - the original date that I asked the baby to come out, as he measures 2 weeks ahead. However I had no physical change like dropping the mucus plug, increased vaginal discharge etc. Baby still moved a lot and I planned to discuss induction plan with my OB on Friday.
Wednesday 4/24 noon: 38w+5 - I was constipated for 2 days and nothing worked for me; miralax, colace, wheat bran etc that usually work suddenly lost all their magic. I drank 30 ml of milk of magnesium hoping that it'd work as my last resort. It did the trick last time when I was badly constipated during 31 weeks, but also failed to work this time.
11:10 pm: was about to sleep, felt some pressure around the abdomen. Then I heard a popping sound and a gush of water leaked uncontrollably from the vagina. I immediately realized the water was broken and we headed to the hospital right away.
11:40 pm: arrived at the hospital, checked in at L&D, redirected to the triage room at 12 am
Thursday 4/25: 38w+6
1:15 am: first cervical exam - it's not that painful if you're relaxed. 2 cm dilated, 70% effaced.
2:20 am: IV inserted, uncomfortable but not painful.
3:35 am: officially admitted and moved to the delivery room
4:30 am: got the epidural. It helped a lot as I started to feel contractions at around 12 am, and they became much stronger and frequently together. I tried to soothe myself with Lamaze breathing technique but it didn't work that well for me.
5:15 am: got the catheter, another cervical exam shows that I was 3.5 cm dilated, 80% effaced, and the baby position was -1. Got pitocin through IV, then I slept for ~2 hours. 7-8 am: multiple check-ins from nurses and my OB. The pain became intolerable after 8 am so I pushed the button for more anesthesia, eventually I could still feel the pain like a really bad period.
9:30 am: third cervical exam and I was fully dilated. So it took ~7 hours for me to diated from 2 to 10 cm and it's fast! I was so glad.
10:25 am: my OB arrived and we started to push!
10:31 am: I cannot feel the urge to poop so had to rely on the delivery team to tell me when to push. But I pushed for 5 times/6 minutes, and the baby was born 😄 with second degree tearing though.
My legs were shaking so bad on the way to the hospital: I knew that this day would have come and I have anticipated it so much, but it still felt surreal to me. I was so scared that I might die but with high adrenaline level, I breezes through with calmness. I did not cry at all and am truly grateful for this experience. Contractions were bad, admittedly, but somehow I was able to connect with my body and knowing that all these were transitional. Epidural worked so well for me, it only started to lose its lust due to me dilating so fast. The baby also remained calm and had a steady heart rate with pitocin coming in. I thought that I'd push for at least an hour, but in 6 mins both the baby and the placenta were out! I watched a couple of videos on how to use the perineal muscles to push efficiently and those did work for me.
For moms to be that are also late in the journey: cherish the days when the fetus is still inside your belly!! 😄 Also don't be too afraid, labor would unfold itself in unanticipated way. I imagined it'd take a whole day for me but everything ended in 12 hours and I'm forever grateful as a FTM. At least in the US, with proper pain management giving birth is entirely doable. Best of luck to all of you!!

Me Hoi Me Noi. I told yall I will be posting two to three chapters a week until we are done. now Reddit has been doing something odd, I can't edit my old posts to update the next tag. so chck the comments for the next button until further notice. if anyone knows a solution, lemme know. for now.....
Let's get this bread.
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"That son of a bitch actually was going to try to kill me," Martinez exclaimed, looking in sheer horror at the contents of Carol's duffle bag.
Martinez had some thoughts of what it might have contained, but nothing came close to this. The bag was essentially a kill kit you would see in the second-rate spy drama or some bad in the hollow flick: handcuffs, syringes, gloves, a jug of lye, bleach, a tarp, and some scalpels.
That was just what Martinez could immediately identify when opening the bag; there were dozens of technical marvels he had no concept of what they were for. The horrible reality that Martinez was facing only worsened when he dug past the tarp.
A knot formed in his throat, damn near gagging him when he realized what that taped-up plastic bag of gold and yellowish powder had to have been.
Visage.
How Kyroll, or anyone for that matter, was willing to use such a horrible substance was unfathomable. One whiff of this stuff, and you would forget the next several days, all while being so impressionable you would gladly chop your arm off if someone asked.
Martinez had seen plenty of people under the effects of this drug since working at the trauma center. None were ever stable, each usually near death or permanently maimed and across to the other side of the Galaxy from where they were drugged.
If Kyroll had a chance to use this on him, Martinez could easily have woken up on the far side of the galaxy. But if Kyroll was willing to use a drug like this to silence him, there was no doubt that he would main Martinez. Martinez likely would end up like Ruhinley: missing a limb, cold, and alone.
Pushing those dark thoughts aside, Martinez returned to the kit and continued looking through it. Just beneath the bag of Visage, there was another thing he did not recognize. It looked like wet granola shoved into a sandwich bag and soaked in oils.
But the colors were all wrong.
Instead of greys and browns, this was a mixture of deep reds, oranges, and purples. By look alone, it reminded him of wet cat food.
Whatever it was, it really didn't matter; it was going to get tossed out with everything else in this kit. Martinez was not going to give Kyroll a chance to use any of his preparations on him by scattering his equipment to the wind and booking it as fast as possible.
He could be home within a day or two; all he would have to do is manage to navigate back. Navigating back by hugging the roads would be easy enough, even if being in the semi-tundra would suck.
As quickly as possible Martinez draped one of the handles over his shoulder and fished the items out at random and began tossing them into the night, never to be found by Kyroll again.
Putting the kibosh on that horrible man's plan gave Martinez that warm and fuzzy feeling in his stomach. One, someone would only get it when they truly beat someone at their own game.
He hated to admit it, but Liza was right about Kyroll being no good, and now that Martinez had given the man a chance, he felt like an ass and realized that even trying was a horrible mistake.
All was going well until Martinez grabbed hold of the bag of kibble-like substance. It squelched and exploded oily juices onto his hand, soaking the bag through. He gagged from the overwhelming rot and decayed overflowing from the substance; as quickly as possible, Martinez chucked it off into the woods, pulling in every muscle possible, and oil dripped into a slick trail from where he stood off into the darkness.
Just as he grabbed the Visage, Martinez was stopped by a firm grip on his wrist. "Martinez, stop," Kyroll shouted, looking at Martinez in confusion and then down into the empty duffle bag covered in slick goo. "Do you have any idea what you've done?"
"Yeah, I stopped you from using this shit on me," Martinez yelled, shoving Kyroll back and throwing the bag of Visage off into the pond before turning back around and then glowering at the older man looking flabbergasted at him.
"Not that you stupid Vur---" Kyroll started but groaned and collapsed to the ground when Martinez brought a firm kick straight into his crotch.
"shut the fuck up, you sociopath," Martinez barked while Kyroll collapsed down and tried to stay steady with one hand, a task that was nearly impossible as he began to vomit, spewing bile and food slop in the snow.
As a man, Martinez, I felt the slightest twinge of sympathy for Kyroll. No one likes getting hit in the nuts, after all. But as a realist, he could not have cared less; a nutshot was the bare minimum that he deserved.
Kyroll gagged and attempted to look up towards Martinez. His hollow, red eyes were vapid, looking as if he deserved what he was getting and accepted it.
The older Aviex looked pathetic, and rightfully so. Anyone willing to use those drugs as a weapon was an enemy, and the Marines had taught Martinez what you do with enemies: you give them no quarter—and make them submit.
Martinez stepped forward to enjoy giving Kyroll what he deserved—a firm ass-kicking. " Get up!" he challenged.
Kyrol tried to get to his feet, pressing up and out of the snow, but the moment his legs found unstable purchase beneath him, Martinez drove a kick into the hunched man's diaphragm, knocking him back into the frost.
" I said get up!" Martinez barked before stomping down onto Kyroll’s back. Martinez's hefty size 12 boot was audible through the night.
Martinez quickly removed his foot and let Kyroll try to stand up—the keyword was try. No matter how the older man attempted to scramble away and regain his composure or however many times he broke his lips and attempted to mutter more lies, a swift boot, fist, or shove was given as an answer, keeping him on the ground, and adding uncountable contusions to his body.
"Come on, is this all you can do? Weren't you going to try to kill me?" Martinez roared, demanding challenge from the man.
"I don't want to fight you," Kyroll managed to squeeze through his teeth after recovering just enough from a hit, but he was still on all fours in the frost. “You have to listen to me."
If anything, his pleading made the situation worse, turning Martinez’s treatment from punishment to cruelty. That Kyroll did not want to fight back earned him a swift boot straight into his face, leaving an imprint across his forehead and cracking his nose like an egg, blood pouring out and into the snow, mixing with the vomiting and bile.
"I don't have to listen to shit from you," Martinez yelled while stepping off to the side a moment before driving a soccer ball kick straight into Kyroll, several of his ribs buckling and snapping underneath the force, leaving him supine and gasping like a fish out of water.
"You know I was more than happy to give you a fucking chance for the sake of your wife or your daughter," Martinez started as Carol lay there gasping for air. "But now I don't care anymore," Martinez continued, placing his boot firmly atop Kyrolls chest and grinding it against his ribs. “But you—you just had to not even extend a fucking olive branch back,”
Despite the apparent amount of pain Kyroll was in, he hadn’t even yelped once as Martinez thrashed him. Maybe it was a matter of adrenaline coursing through him, or Kyroll was legitimately just that much of a hard ass.
Either way, Martinez didn't have any of it.
Martinez pushed more of his weight onto his foot atop Kyroll’s chest, leaning in closer.
Air escaped Kyrolls lungs as the weight on him increased, making breathing all but impossible. "Unlike you, I'm not just going to kill someone and think that solves all of my fucking problems. But don't get it twisted here. I am not above hurting you."
Kyrolls gripped Martinez’s calf and pushed, alleviating the slightest amount of pressure, but he still made no attempt to fight back; he just kept himself breathing.
This was different from how Martinez pictured a confrontation between them. Yeah, Martinez was a decent fighter, But Kyroll was a former Special Forces operator and had more combat experience than Martinez could fathom. Kyroll was almost double his age but still should be able to put up a fight; it shouldn't be a one-sided beatdown. Something was off here. But in Martinez’s sadistic rage, that thought did not register.
Before Martinez could ponder the idea further, Kyroll lifted his leg just enough so he could croak out his warning.
"Run Away!"
"Run? Run from what you? Or is there something else out here that you planned also to try to kill me?” Martinez replied, gesturing around himself into the darkness and re-engaging his hold on Kyroll. " are your friends out there ready to blow my brains out now?"
Before Kyroll could elaborate on the dangers present a roar as loud as a jet fighter echoed through the night, shaking the timbers and rattling both to the core.
"From that," Kyroll assured, using the lapse in Martinez's focus to slip out and spit up from the ground, taking the chance to spit blood and a broken fang out his mouth. "That bag of Brigal rang the dinner bell,"
"For what?" Martinez replied, rushing past the fire to retrieve his rifle, understanding that an animal is more dangerous than a sentient—at least in a pinch.
Kyroll hoisted himself out of the snow, every muscle screaming and in agony, and began to limp to his tent to grab his rifle." Any Milurt within several days' walk," he answered plainly, not wanting any embellishment to make the danger they were in any less evident. It also helped because just breathing at this point was agony.
Kyroll wanted Martinez to feel like he wasn't much of a threat anymore and thusly took the thrashing he gave him. But in retrospect, with that bag of Milurt having been opened? He should have actually fought back, but either way, they still would be in the same situation, and if you had fought, they both would be wounded messes, not just him. So it did not matter.
"So what were you going to feed me to that thing?" Martinez said, checking for a round in the chamber. Upon seeing the small orange straight-wall caseless round, he sent the bolt home and continued to scan for wherever that roar came from.
Kyroll shrugged, knowing there was no point in explaining the details of the plan he had given up on. If they made it through this, he could explain his thought process to Martinez, but he knew very well that was a big if. For now, survival was the only thing that mattered.
limping as quickly as his battered body could, Kyroll moved past Martinez toward the trail leading the truc,k leaving the majority of his gear where it lay. They wouldn't need it, and gathering it would take too long. "Come on, we need to go,"
Martinez shot his hand out and grabbed Carroll's shoulder, earning him a venom-filled glare, ”You must be high if you think showing you anywhere."
“I'm not high, and you will follow me if you want to live," Kyroll argued, rolling his shoulder free of Martinez's grasp, continuing down the path, and starting a slow jog.
The millisecond, Martinez's hand was wrenched from Kyroll's shoulder, a roar louder than the first vibrated his teeth; looking off into the distance, Martinez couldn't see hide nor hair of what was creating those whaling roars.
But more joined the first two and quickly became a defiant chorus. Like watchmen on an old bastion's front, one after another rose up, calling for violence; the cacophony shook the bows, each new tone announcing they had joined the hunt.
Before long, Martinez couldn't even tell one from the other. There were dozens of them, likely stretching out hundreds of kilometers, all answering the call to find the liquid soaking his skin.
Deciding that survival was more important than their fight, Martinez pivoted and followed as quickly as possible. "Can't we scare them off like last time?"
"It wouldn't work,” Kyroll plainly replied. “Any of that that Brigal would have alerted them to kill anything nearby.”
Hearing that, Martinez paused, his heart as still as a statue while he looked down at his right arm glistening in the dim moonlight; his heart sank like a stone, understanding fully what Kyroll had just told him.
"I’m covered in it," Martinez admitted
Without even looking back to confirm, Kyroll took Martinez’s words as gospel accelerated from a jog into a full-bore run, his wounded body moving as quickly as possible as the wan moonlight would allow. " double time Doc, we have to move,"
-----
So the turn tables have turned. Time for some dynamic changes of Martinez and Kyroll rolling back to what they have built into them. For now I hope you all enjoyed the chapter, expect a new one ASAP.
Please don't forget to updoot and comment.
your baker man
-Pirate
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Our cat, Pretzel, 17 Months, recently had to have an emergency C-Section due to some complications with the birth. We also had her spayed at the same time due to how badly the birth went as we didn't want there to be any chance of repeating the experience. Unfortunately none of the three kittens made it through the experience and she now has a Hernia.
We are currently looking for some advise as we're not convinced she has been receiving the best care throughout the experience and wanted a second opinion from a qualified outside perspective.
I've written up a timeline of the events below:
Wednesday 24th April
16:30 - Estimated time labor began
17:30 - Arrived home from work to find Pretzel in labor
20:00 - No progression with the labor, rang the OOH vet line and were told that the Veterinarian 1 (we'll call them Veterinarian 1 as we have seen quite a few different Veterinarians) this is normal and cat labors can take quite a while. See how she gets on and ring back in the morning if there is no progression.
Thursday 25th April
07:30 - Woke up to find the tail of one of the kittens sticking out of Pretzel.
08:10 - Rang the vets for advise as there was no progress with birthing the kitten, the tail just going back and forth. Vets advised to take her into the practice.
08:30 - Arrived at the Vets with Pretzel.
08:45 - Pretzel called in by the Veterinarian (Veterinarian 2) with her commenting "You've just caught me a I was just leaving for the RSPCA".
The vet tried to help maneuver the kitten out of Pretzel will no luck, at one point having the vets finger inside of Pretzel. Vet advised that they might need to do an emergency C-Section but they will give it one more go. The vet pulled the kitten out of pretzel, causing her pain to the point that she bit down on my partners nose and pulled her head back in pain. The kitten was unfortunately not breathing.
After this the vet gave my partner two options: either take Pretzel home and see how things progress naturally now that the stuck kitten had been removed or leave her at the Vets for them to monitor. My partner said that she would prefer to have Pretzel stay at the vet so they can monitor and provided any further assistance needed but the vet persuaded my partner to take Pretzel home instead advising that she may get on better at home in a comfortable environment.
No paid relief was given throughout the process.
09:40 - My partner arrived home with Pretzel. Pretzel went back to her 'nest' which was a crib we had set up by the side of our bed to act as a kitten box. My partner stayed with Pretzel throughout as pretzel seems to appreciate her being there for comfort.
11:40 - No further progressions with the labor. My partner called the Vet back to ask for some further advise. Vet advised to leave Pretzel on her own for an hour and call back if there is still no progression after that.
12:40 - My partner checked on Pretzel and called the Vets back as there was still no progression.
13:00 - My partner arrived back at the Vet with Pretzel and was Immediately seen by another Veterinarian (Veterinarian 3) who was extremely concerned and commented something along with lines of "She's been in labor for how long?!" before rushing her off for an emergency C-Section. At this point Pretzel was exhausted and had a rapid heart rate. This is when we also opted to have her Spayed at the same time to prevent this from happening again in future.
Two more kittens were born from the C-Section which unfortunately didn't make it. The vets did say they tried CPR on the kittens for 15 minutes to no avail.
18:15 - Picked Pretzel up from the vets after the procedure and were given Loxicom (Meloxicam) to be given to Pretzel once a day with her Dinner starting the following day.
The woman that was there at time was another new face. I'm not sure if she was a Veterinarian or not but we have not seen her again since.
She then advised that we need to book a check-up for Saturday.
Friday 26th April
My partner took the day off work to stay with Pretzel
Pretzel took her medication in the evening without issue
Pretzel would occasionally wake up 'screaming' for lack of a better word but would quickly settle back down after no more than 15 seconds so we put this up to her having nightmares about being at the vet as she didn't appear to be in any pain.
Pretzel was given 4ml of 0.5 mg/ml Loxicom (Meloxicam) with her dinner as instructed by the Vets.
Saturday 27th April
11:00 - Took Pretzel in for her check-up and she was looked at by Veterinarian 2. She removed the covering and the dressing on the stitched. At this point I mentioned that she hasn't had a poo since before going into labor. Veterinarian 2 then had a feel around Pretzels abdomen and said she cant feel anything but her not passing a stool is concerning and said we should just continue to monitor it.
I pressed her a bit which lead to her giving me some laxatives' to take home and give to Pretzel 3 times a day starting the following day (Sunday) until she passes a stool. Fortunately that was not necessary as she passed a stool shortly after arriving home from the vets.
Before leaving Veterinarian 2 said that she doesn't think they will need to see Pretzel again other than when she needs to have her stitches out. Instead we should email a picture of Pretzels stitches to them on Wednesday for them to review.
Rest of the day - Nothing of note other than still occasionally waking up 'screaming' as detailed prior. Pretzel was given 4ml of 0.5 mg/ml Loxicom (Meloxicam) with her dinner as instructed by the Vets.
Sunday 28th April
Nothing of note other than still occasionally waking up 'screaming' as detailed prior.
Pretzel was given 4ml of 0.5 mg/ml Loxicom (Meloxicam) with her dinner as instructed by the Vets.
Monday 29th April
Nothing of note other than still occasionally waking up 'screaming' as detailed prior.
Both me and my partner had to go to work. Pretzel was shut in our bedroom throughout the day with fresh biscuits, water and a litter tray while we were at work to keep her separated from out other cat.
Pretzel was given 4ml of 0.5 mg/ml Loxicom (Meloxicam) with her dinner as instructed by the Vets.
Tuesday 30th April
Nothing of note other than still occasionally waking up 'screaming' as detailed prior.
Both me and my partner had to go to work. Pretzel was shut in our bedroom throughout the day with fresh biscuits, water and a litter tray while we were at work to keep her separated from out other cat.
Pretzel was given 4ml of 0.5 mg/ml Loxicom (Meloxicam) with her dinner as instructed by the Vets.
Wednesday 1st May (Today)
08:30 - Emailed the vets the pictures of Pretzels stitches.
10:51 - Answered a call from the Vet advising that they believe Pretzel may have a hernia and they would like her in to check on it.
16:45 - Took Pretzel into the vets to have her checked over. A surgical nurse felt around her stomach and advised that he could "Feel a hole" and "Get his whole finger in-between the muscles". He then took Pretzel to have one of his colleagues feel and get a second opinion.
He then returned roughly 10-15 minutes later saying that three of them have had a feel and can all feel the hole and she will need to be brought back in tomorrow morning (Thursday 2nd May) between 08:00 and 08:30 for a corrective surgery then they will need to keep her until the end of the day for monitoring after which we can pick her up.
Pretzel was given 4ml of 0.5 mg/ml Loxicom (Meloxicam) with her dinner as instructed by the Vets.
END OF TIMELINE
After the whole ordeal my partner and I are not sure about taking her back to that same Vets.
I guess my question is does anything stand out as blatantly wrong with how this has been handled by the Vets or is this just a shitty situation all round where standard practices were followed but we were unlucky with how things turned out.
If helpful I am happy to share the photos of her stitches taken today (Wednesday 1st May).
To my untrained eye the stitches look a complete mess. This is part of the doubt in my mind as they're the only real sign of 'Workmanship" I have to go off and it doesn't look good to me.
Though, admittedly, I don't really understand what I'm looking at to know if they are good or bad.
TLDR:
Our cat, Pretzel, who's 17 months old, went through a traumatic birthing experience resulting in an emergency C-section and spaying. Sadly, none of the kittens survived, and Pretzel now has a hernia. We're unsure if she received the best care and are seeking a second opinion. The timeline details the events, including delayed intervention by vets and concerns about Pretzel's well-being post-surgery. Despite doubts about the vet's competence, we're scheduled for hernia correction surgery but are hesitant.

36M, White, former smoker, 1-2 alcoholic drinks per week, no drugs.
Currently in Buenos Aires, Argentina.
For the last 2 weeks, I have been experiencing neuralgia under my left armpit, extending from the back to my left nipple. It is a constant burning stinging pain that never fully subsides. Pain is strongest in left nipple.
I am also experiencing heavy fatigue during this time as well, which also rarely fully subsides.
I visited a doctor here, and they told me it was probably just muscle pain. However, they were with me only for a few minutes and I didn't really feel satisfied with such a diagnosis as I had done no exertion in the affected area and this is a much different type of pain than I have ever experienced. They did say if a rash appears to come back, as it would be indicative of shingles. However, no rash has appeared.
I am googling myself into medical anxiety (bad I know, but I've never been so ill for so long), and I speak about this often to my mother who is a very experienced healthcare professional (nurse practitioner, 40+ years working in various fields).
My main fear is fibromyalgia, which my mother says it's too soon to worry about and she thinks I'm just suffering from a virus and to be easy.
However, I did ask her if I could have been poisoned and mentioned that in the apartment I was renting, a man came to fumigate twice for roaches, both times wearing a white suit and gas mask. The second time, I asked him if it was okay for me to stay in the apartment, and he said yes.
Now she asked if my symptoms have started since they sprayed (they have) and that could be a reason. Now I am quite paranoid, as I'm worried I have permanent nerve damage from a pesticide. How likely is this?

Basically I have a core/leg day. With core I just do a 20 min exercise of it. With legs I do leg press and calf raises. Then I do a HIIT treadmill. I have big quads, not muscle tho just mostly fat.
Do I want big quads? Not rlly, I think it would make me look more shorter. Im kinda short by normal standards.
Why would I think of adding leg extensions? Partly because I am investing on calisthenics, and the L sit really flexes the quads from my experience. Also the goal is to make the mostly fat quads turn into muscle.
So should I add or no? If yes, how many reps and sets? Rest time per set too.