Questions to ask when doing a career genogram
Career Guidance
2011.12.25 00:33 blindteach Career Guidance
A place to discuss career options, to ask questions and give advice!
2018.01.22 07:07 kormapls Experienced Devs
For experienced developers. This community should be specialized subreddit facilitating discussion amongst individuals who have gained some ground in the software engineering world. Any posts or comments that are made by inexperienced individuals (outside of the weekly Ask thread) should be reported. Anything not specifically related to development or career advice that is _specific_ to Experienced Developers belongs elsewhere. Try /work, /AskHR, /careerguidance, or /OfficePolitics.
2011.03.28 01:09 sqlinjector AskEngineers: Stop nodding, start asking questions.
Engineers apply the knowledge of math & science to design and manufacture maintainable systems used to solve specific problems. AskEngineers is a forum for questions about the technologies, standards, and processes used to design & build these systems, as well as for questions about the engineering profession and its many disciplines.
2024.06.02 07:19 Tough-Fortune4400 Is this cheating or not, I need advice
He was walking into the kitchen from hall and his sister was bent over and he grabbed her hips and touched her but and kinda trusted her. She's wearing black sweat pants I was wearing jeans I was in the same room standing right in front of him looking at him bc I was about to ask him a question
He also called his sister his girlfriend when the ball was next to her "The ball is next to my girlfriend" I'm on the completely different side of the room and sitting next to him
I dont think Being drunk is an excuse
He also smacked his other sister's butt as she walked by I am sitting not even a foot away from where he's standing, she was also wearing black leggings
They are both in their 20s And this was on his 18th birthday party
When I tried talking to him about it I cried alot it really felt like I had just been cheated on right infront of my eyes. He used the excuse that he was drunk and thought it was me. And when I said anything about cheating, he said it wasn't cheating bc he was in his own house and they are his sisters so it doesn't count
We've been in a relationship for a year and a half
It's been about 3 weeks since this happened and I still think about it everyday and I have sm anxiety when he goes out drinking bc what if he does it again with not his sister and I never find out, I feel like I have to be with him 24/7 while he's drinking and when he's not. I now have this huge anxiety that every time he gets drunk thar he's going to cheat.
What should I do and what would you do in this situation? I don't think I could ever leave him.
submitted by Tough-Fortune4400 to u/Tough-Fortune4400 [link] [comments]
He also called his sister his girlfriend when the ball was next to her "The ball is next to my girlfriend" I'm on the completely different side of the room and sitting next to him
I dont think Being drunk is an excuse
He also smacked his other sister's butt as she walked by I am sitting not even a foot away from where he's standing, she was also wearing black leggings
They are both in their 20s And this was on his 18th birthday party
When I tried talking to him about it I cried alot it really felt like I had just been cheated on right infront of my eyes. He used the excuse that he was drunk and thought it was me. And when I said anything about cheating, he said it wasn't cheating bc he was in his own house and they are his sisters so it doesn't count
We've been in a relationship for a year and a half
It's been about 3 weeks since this happened and I still think about it everyday and I have sm anxiety when he goes out drinking bc what if he does it again with not his sister and I never find out, I feel like I have to be with him 24/7 while he's drinking and when he's not. I now have this huge anxiety that every time he gets drunk thar he's going to cheat.
What should I do and what would you do in this situation? I don't think I could ever leave him.
2024.06.02 07:19 NegotiationPitiful55 I fucking HATE being on vacation with my friends family
This trip has been an absolute mess and annoyance to me. It has not been any fun at all and I want to go home already but unfortunately I am here for another 2-3 days. I wanted to go on vacay to get away from MY mom bc she's such a narcissist as well and I am sick of not being treated emotionally like a 19 year old. They did not pay for my plane ticket, they just had extra space in the hotel for me .
I'll cut to the chase to what really set this off on this trip and shit that's just happened. Yesterday, we went to a resort in Mexico because they had a one day pass. At the end of it, Dalia (my friend's 30 yr old half sister) was too drunk and she took a taxi with her 6 year old daughter and Shayla (the sister's friend). We were originally supposed to go shopping at the mall after the resort and eat at an Italian restaurant within the resort but that did not go to plan. Anyway, after that it was just me, my friend May and her parents. I thought we were going to go shopping like they said we would because that is something everyone, especially ME since it's my favorite thing to do to cope, wanted to do. We didn't even do that and the only reason they even took us to the shopping strip in the first place was because they wanted to buy weed. They didn't even say that initially and I only found that out because they kept getting agitated bc they couldn't fin the McDonald's they were trying to use as a land marker. But I knew where the McDonalds was and I was very confused as to why they weren't listening to me when I was telling them where it was bc I thought they just wanted McDonald's since the food at the resort wasn't too good.
Nope.
My friend told me that they wouldn't directly say they were getting weed because "they still need to be somewhat of a good influence" or something like that, like what?? They haven't been that this WHOLE trip and nobody is fucking dumb. They've been smoking and talking about weed this whole time in front of us/me. So why does THAT matter now ? Why tf would I care you're adults?? I literally have wanted weed this whole time anyway and already bought alcohol. I would have went home if they were gonna waste my time bc I thought something fun was going to happen.
This is the worst part. After we come back from the whole McDonalds shit, the four of us get into a taxi to go back to the Airbnb. When we arrive in front of our residence, the dad pulls out his card but the driver says he only takes cash. The dad flips his shit, says he's scamming him or whatever. The ride was 200 pesos, which is 10 USD. He says the driver is scamming him because he has been paying with his card the whole time. The mom thinks they're being scammed too. The dad was about to punch the driver in the face over ten fucking dollars??? The mom and my friend had to convince him to fucking stop and he kept getting mad at the daughter telling her to get tf inside. I had to end up paying (again) the ten dollars because I had cash. I say again because at the start of the trip, I had to pay 80 dollars for the cab to the Airbnb bc the dad didn't have service to pay so I used the cash I had. I did get the money back but still. wtf. Also they were not being scammed and if they were it wasn't even THAT bad because all of the taxis are 10 to 17 dollars from the mall to where we live. They think it's a scam because he wanted cash. I had a taxi driver when I snuck out once because there wasn't any food and I was STARVING, I asked him if he takes cash or card and he said cash, but it was still all the same price. They don't know I snuck out and I'm glad I didn't tell my friend that I did because she would have told them. probably.
The next day, which is today, I wake up and everybody is just fucking gone besides my friend and her sisters daughter. This pisses me off because they have left us, to baby sit the little girl AGAIN for idek how many times they've done that. It's extremely fucking annoying I haven't even been able to enjoy the trip and my friend damn sure has not either. she said she was really embarrassed yesterday to the dad and wouldn't have invited me if the parents were gonna act like they do at home with/around me. The dad "apologizes" today saying "Im sorry for being so embarrassing" like what?
They told us to go shop and have fun. To not let any of the shit that happened ruin the fun. Idk how that's possible but whatever I might as well. My friend didn't want to go shopping because she was crying and upset today. I was getting dressed because I said I am just going then because I was so sick of not being able to do ONE thing I wanted to. She then ended up coming with but then her phone not charging ruined her mood again and she wasn't going anymore. I was given money to use from home and was determined to just use it.I just wanted to do something fun for fucking once. I told my narc mom I was going to go out with or without my friend because it would have been BAD at home for me had I not enforced that. She kept pleading me not to go alone but I was persisting and wasn't asking. She just ended up telling me she's worried and to just be safe. Wasn't mad.
I walked out and paid for the taxi. I only went because it was only a 3-5 minute taxi ride to the public mall to shop. My friend then calls me asking if I left and why'd I go without her?? She literally didn't even want to go anymore and I said that. She tells me she insists I come back and she said it wasn't smart to leave and that "I'll get snatched up". Her parents and everyone were angry with me she said. First of all, her parents and everyone else kept fucking walking away from us without saying a word as to where they were heading. could have been fucking kidnapped multiple times because of them since that's the damn problem. I didn't even want to go alone initially, but it was bright as day outside, I am sick of this family and I'd rather be alone and do what I want to do, since that's clearly never gonna happen with them. Plus I shouldn't have to rely on company or anyone to have fun, especially at this point. Her mom gets on the phone and just tells me to come back bc she's responsible for me but then is like "because if you don't come back Im going to have to call your mom". I can never get a break away from my mom no matter the damn situation it seems. That was literally not needed at all. She called her anyway regardless of me saying I was coming back.
Also now im being accused of stealing their fucking weed they leave out on the counter. I don't need ur fucking weed if I WANTED weed (which I have this whole time but that was only between me and my friend) I can BUY my own weed with the money I have. The first time my friend asked me I didn't care because it was just a question out of concern. Today she asked me a second time and now I am feeling accused. She said her dad thinks I took it because my laptop was there. EVERYBODYS STUFF HAS BEEN DOWNSTAIRS. How is that even a good accusation and you're asking me the second time. There was no way it was not Shayla because she kept walking away to ask strangers for fucking cigarettes day 1 of the trip. then walked away AGAIN that day to try and buy some. She was also downstairs at like 5am one time bc I went downstairs to go outside rq and I saw her doing god knows what in the dark. I don't even think they even tried to question her about it, since she's been smoking with them but instead have only been accusing me.
I have tried to be very respectful to my friend's family because I don't want to be rude or say anything bad since that's her family. I don't know how long I'm going to be able to deal with it though and if I'm accused a third time I am going to fucking snap and probably cuss someone out. I am also trying not to get into any trouble at home because whether it's reasonable or not my mom is going to say I was being disrespectful and take their side on that regard.
TL;DR: I am on vacation in Mexico with my friends family and my patience has been tested this whole entire time. i've been accused of stealing weed twice which I have NOT done at all and it doesn't seem like they've asked anyone else. The dad threatened to punch the taxi driver over ten dollars bc he thought the taxi driver was scamming him when he wasn't. I had to pay for the ten dollars in cash and I also paid 80 initially at the start of trip for the taxi because the dad didn't have service on his phone.
submitted by NegotiationPitiful55 to self [link] [comments]
I'll cut to the chase to what really set this off on this trip and shit that's just happened. Yesterday, we went to a resort in Mexico because they had a one day pass. At the end of it, Dalia (my friend's 30 yr old half sister) was too drunk and she took a taxi with her 6 year old daughter and Shayla (the sister's friend). We were originally supposed to go shopping at the mall after the resort and eat at an Italian restaurant within the resort but that did not go to plan. Anyway, after that it was just me, my friend May and her parents. I thought we were going to go shopping like they said we would because that is something everyone, especially ME since it's my favorite thing to do to cope, wanted to do. We didn't even do that and the only reason they even took us to the shopping strip in the first place was because they wanted to buy weed. They didn't even say that initially and I only found that out because they kept getting agitated bc they couldn't fin the McDonald's they were trying to use as a land marker. But I knew where the McDonalds was and I was very confused as to why they weren't listening to me when I was telling them where it was bc I thought they just wanted McDonald's since the food at the resort wasn't too good.
Nope.
My friend told me that they wouldn't directly say they were getting weed because "they still need to be somewhat of a good influence" or something like that, like what?? They haven't been that this WHOLE trip and nobody is fucking dumb. They've been smoking and talking about weed this whole time in front of us/me. So why does THAT matter now ? Why tf would I care you're adults?? I literally have wanted weed this whole time anyway and already bought alcohol. I would have went home if they were gonna waste my time bc I thought something fun was going to happen.
This is the worst part. After we come back from the whole McDonalds shit, the four of us get into a taxi to go back to the Airbnb. When we arrive in front of our residence, the dad pulls out his card but the driver says he only takes cash. The dad flips his shit, says he's scamming him or whatever. The ride was 200 pesos, which is 10 USD. He says the driver is scamming him because he has been paying with his card the whole time. The mom thinks they're being scammed too. The dad was about to punch the driver in the face over ten fucking dollars??? The mom and my friend had to convince him to fucking stop and he kept getting mad at the daughter telling her to get tf inside. I had to end up paying (again) the ten dollars because I had cash. I say again because at the start of the trip, I had to pay 80 dollars for the cab to the Airbnb bc the dad didn't have service to pay so I used the cash I had. I did get the money back but still. wtf. Also they were not being scammed and if they were it wasn't even THAT bad because all of the taxis are 10 to 17 dollars from the mall to where we live. They think it's a scam because he wanted cash. I had a taxi driver when I snuck out once because there wasn't any food and I was STARVING, I asked him if he takes cash or card and he said cash, but it was still all the same price. They don't know I snuck out and I'm glad I didn't tell my friend that I did because she would have told them. probably.
The next day, which is today, I wake up and everybody is just fucking gone besides my friend and her sisters daughter. This pisses me off because they have left us, to baby sit the little girl AGAIN for idek how many times they've done that. It's extremely fucking annoying I haven't even been able to enjoy the trip and my friend damn sure has not either. she said she was really embarrassed yesterday to the dad and wouldn't have invited me if the parents were gonna act like they do at home with/around me. The dad "apologizes" today saying "Im sorry for being so embarrassing" like what?
They told us to go shop and have fun. To not let any of the shit that happened ruin the fun. Idk how that's possible but whatever I might as well. My friend didn't want to go shopping because she was crying and upset today. I was getting dressed because I said I am just going then because I was so sick of not being able to do ONE thing I wanted to. She then ended up coming with but then her phone not charging ruined her mood again and she wasn't going anymore. I was given money to use from home and was determined to just use it.I just wanted to do something fun for fucking once. I told my narc mom I was going to go out with or without my friend because it would have been BAD at home for me had I not enforced that. She kept pleading me not to go alone but I was persisting and wasn't asking. She just ended up telling me she's worried and to just be safe. Wasn't mad.
I walked out and paid for the taxi. I only went because it was only a 3-5 minute taxi ride to the public mall to shop. My friend then calls me asking if I left and why'd I go without her?? She literally didn't even want to go anymore and I said that. She tells me she insists I come back and she said it wasn't smart to leave and that "I'll get snatched up". Her parents and everyone were angry with me she said. First of all, her parents and everyone else kept fucking walking away from us without saying a word as to where they were heading. could have been fucking kidnapped multiple times because of them since that's the damn problem. I didn't even want to go alone initially, but it was bright as day outside, I am sick of this family and I'd rather be alone and do what I want to do, since that's clearly never gonna happen with them. Plus I shouldn't have to rely on company or anyone to have fun, especially at this point. Her mom gets on the phone and just tells me to come back bc she's responsible for me but then is like "because if you don't come back Im going to have to call your mom". I can never get a break away from my mom no matter the damn situation it seems. That was literally not needed at all. She called her anyway regardless of me saying I was coming back.
Also now im being accused of stealing their fucking weed they leave out on the counter. I don't need ur fucking weed if I WANTED weed (which I have this whole time but that was only between me and my friend) I can BUY my own weed with the money I have. The first time my friend asked me I didn't care because it was just a question out of concern. Today she asked me a second time and now I am feeling accused. She said her dad thinks I took it because my laptop was there. EVERYBODYS STUFF HAS BEEN DOWNSTAIRS. How is that even a good accusation and you're asking me the second time. There was no way it was not Shayla because she kept walking away to ask strangers for fucking cigarettes day 1 of the trip. then walked away AGAIN that day to try and buy some. She was also downstairs at like 5am one time bc I went downstairs to go outside rq and I saw her doing god knows what in the dark. I don't even think they even tried to question her about it, since she's been smoking with them but instead have only been accusing me.
I have tried to be very respectful to my friend's family because I don't want to be rude or say anything bad since that's her family. I don't know how long I'm going to be able to deal with it though and if I'm accused a third time I am going to fucking snap and probably cuss someone out. I am also trying not to get into any trouble at home because whether it's reasonable or not my mom is going to say I was being disrespectful and take their side on that regard.
TL;DR: I am on vacation in Mexico with my friends family and my patience has been tested this whole entire time. i've been accused of stealing weed twice which I have NOT done at all and it doesn't seem like they've asked anyone else. The dad threatened to punch the taxi driver over ten dollars bc he thought the taxi driver was scamming him when he wasn't. I had to pay for the ten dollars in cash and I also paid 80 initially at the start of trip for the taxi because the dad didn't have service on his phone.
2024.06.02 07:12 ComplexPurple4473 I can’t tell if my bf (31M) actually likes me (32 F) or is just tolerating me.. and what to do about it?
I’m sorry this is so long. I’d love to hear what you think.
We’ve been together for 3 years. Moved in together after 7 months during the pandemic. I’m the first girlfriend he’s lived with.
Shift in behaviour — I find he has changed a lot since we’ve become more close but I’ve stayed consistent. When we first met, he was a lot more positive and interested in me. He rarely asks me questions now and challenges many things I say. He is a lot more negative and judgemental of both me, my family and people we encounter. I didn’t think it was a terrible thing, more that he’s gotten comfortable with me. But I do feel a shift has taken place in the past 2 years. And sometimes the lack of positivity toward me feels disrespectful too. Lots of immature jokes, scoffing at things I say, speaking down to me or in a passive aggressive or condescending tone about the smallest things or even about things that clearly matter to me but not to him.
Emotions difficult — He has been transparent that he “struggles with empathy” since the early days. I remember noting that as a red flag but I thought maybe he was being flippant. He was not. I have tried many times to bring up our lack of emotional depth and he’s rarely responded well. It usually turns quickly into a defensive debate. Lots of “I treat you great.” “Sorry you think I’m such a bad boyfriend” types of statements that then take us away from the point. I am left apologizing for bringing it up. We never check in emotionally. He cannot name his own emotions aside from good or bad. He does not ask questions about my emotions. I am a very emotive person. I cry and I feel really deep (sometimes painful) empathy. I find he just stares or watches me when I’m upset or crying. He never asks questions, he rarely knows how to comfort me. His best way to support is to tell me it will pass. Which is helpful but not to the extent I was hoping.
Trauma doesn’t exist — Lastly, I have dealt with stuff in life that I know has had an impact on me. I am trying to figure it out and unpack it through reading, online research, and therapy. He has told me that he doesn’t believe childhood or young adult difficult experiences should have that much of an affect on you. I have told him about the situations and he barely asked about them, he barely showed interest, he’s never checked in on them or acknowledged situations that would clearly be triggering since. In fact, he’s even made a joke here or there that has been in relation to them. He had a pretty unstable childhood with a lot of parental neglect so it’s hard for me to see aspects of his life that could be improved by addressing them. And it’s invalidating to see his eyes glaze over when I reference mine.
I’m no peach — I have my issues. Like I said, I’m a very emotional person. I also struggle with anxiety at times. I’m currently going through a very depressive episode and have even shared with him that I have felt suicidal lately. He hasn’t tried to talk about it with me at all. He hasn’t tried to help. He offers bandaid unhealthy solutions like watching TV or eating out. It feels like he thinks it’s not real and is an inconvenience.
About a year ago we were watching Jerry Macguire and there’s this scene where he tells the woman that he thinks he’s only with her because of how much he likes her son. I remember my partner turning to me and saying he felt the same way regarding me but he’s staying for the dog. Since then, he’s apologized for the joke but man.. he sure does give our dog a lot of tenderness, compassion, and attention.
submitted by ComplexPurple4473 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
We’ve been together for 3 years. Moved in together after 7 months during the pandemic. I’m the first girlfriend he’s lived with.
Shift in behaviour — I find he has changed a lot since we’ve become more close but I’ve stayed consistent. When we first met, he was a lot more positive and interested in me. He rarely asks me questions now and challenges many things I say. He is a lot more negative and judgemental of both me, my family and people we encounter. I didn’t think it was a terrible thing, more that he’s gotten comfortable with me. But I do feel a shift has taken place in the past 2 years. And sometimes the lack of positivity toward me feels disrespectful too. Lots of immature jokes, scoffing at things I say, speaking down to me or in a passive aggressive or condescending tone about the smallest things or even about things that clearly matter to me but not to him.
Emotions difficult — He has been transparent that he “struggles with empathy” since the early days. I remember noting that as a red flag but I thought maybe he was being flippant. He was not. I have tried many times to bring up our lack of emotional depth and he’s rarely responded well. It usually turns quickly into a defensive debate. Lots of “I treat you great.” “Sorry you think I’m such a bad boyfriend” types of statements that then take us away from the point. I am left apologizing for bringing it up. We never check in emotionally. He cannot name his own emotions aside from good or bad. He does not ask questions about my emotions. I am a very emotive person. I cry and I feel really deep (sometimes painful) empathy. I find he just stares or watches me when I’m upset or crying. He never asks questions, he rarely knows how to comfort me. His best way to support is to tell me it will pass. Which is helpful but not to the extent I was hoping.
Trauma doesn’t exist — Lastly, I have dealt with stuff in life that I know has had an impact on me. I am trying to figure it out and unpack it through reading, online research, and therapy. He has told me that he doesn’t believe childhood or young adult difficult experiences should have that much of an affect on you. I have told him about the situations and he barely asked about them, he barely showed interest, he’s never checked in on them or acknowledged situations that would clearly be triggering since. In fact, he’s even made a joke here or there that has been in relation to them. He had a pretty unstable childhood with a lot of parental neglect so it’s hard for me to see aspects of his life that could be improved by addressing them. And it’s invalidating to see his eyes glaze over when I reference mine.
I’m no peach — I have my issues. Like I said, I’m a very emotional person. I also struggle with anxiety at times. I’m currently going through a very depressive episode and have even shared with him that I have felt suicidal lately. He hasn’t tried to talk about it with me at all. He hasn’t tried to help. He offers bandaid unhealthy solutions like watching TV or eating out. It feels like he thinks it’s not real and is an inconvenience.
About a year ago we were watching Jerry Macguire and there’s this scene where he tells the woman that he thinks he’s only with her because of how much he likes her son. I remember my partner turning to me and saying he felt the same way regarding me but he’s staying for the dog. Since then, he’s apologized for the joke but man.. he sure does give our dog a lot of tenderness, compassion, and attention.
2024.06.02 07:09 TheAbsoluteBread Project Octopath Traveler 3: Oukirii the Hunter, Chapter 2
Hey Everyone! I came to realize pretty quickly that I did not have as much of this chapter planned out as I thought I did. Which explains why it took a little long to come out, but in the end I managed to create something that I was satisfied with. You may notice one key change, being that Oukirii’s Companion no longer has a defined name! You’re free to name it whatever you wish.
(Completed Chapter 2s: Thearnt, Taland, Pascal, Harmony, Crowson, Asherah, Oukirii)
Next Chapter 2: Orlando the Starseer
Oukirii the Hunter, Chapter 2: Recommended Level 26
——————
(The Journey So Far…)
Events along Oukirii’s first hunt created damage in her family.
Her father came to realize that she had no intention of become a strong hunter on her own.
Even if she knew that, Oukirii couldn’t answer the question “Then what do you want to be?”
One evening, she had a dream of world’s destruction. A prophet came by the following day and told her of the beasts she saw that night.
Oukirii volunteered to hunt the beasts down, in hopes that this journey would reveal her true purpose to her…
Oukirii and Her Companion set foot in Evercold. The first thing Oukirii notes is the cold air of the snowy region. “You alright boy?” She crouches down and pets her companion on the head. It makes a joyful cry. “Hansel should be around here right?” Oukirii continues “He probably knows where we should go to look for Snow Gem!”
She takes a few steps forward, “This town is— very different from Oakbright…” Oukirii looks down. “Alright, Let’s go find Hansel!”
You’d be prompted to look for Hansel
(Blanche’s Dialogue will change depending on if you’ve visited the ranch prior. “You look familiar”/”Who’re you? A hunter?”)
Blanche would go on to explain that she’s here to pick up supplies. She notices Oukirii’s companion and hands her a bag of food before grabbing onto the wagon again. Suzie would give Oukirii a nod as they leave.
As Oukirii puts away the bag, She notices Hansel standing near the path that Blanche and Suzie went along. Oukirii runs over to Hansel and tells him that she’s ready to take on Snow Gem.
Hansel is glad to hear it. He would tell Oukirii that this beast has been terrorizing the citizens of Evercold for a long time. “Hunting Snow Gem is not only important for our own sun-saving mission. It’s for the relief of all these people right here.”
“Well I’ll have to do my best then!”
“I believe in you Oukirii. I really do.”
Oukirii would walk away from Hansel and you’d head further into town. Oukirii suddenly hears the sound of someone shouting “No, Not again!” Her companion points his nose in the direction of the shouting and a curious Oukirii runs over to find a girl standing outside of her home. She asks if something’s wrong and the girl tells her that she lost a book she borrowed from the town’s library.
Oukirii volunteers to help look, the girl just laughs loudly “It’s nowhere I can find, best of luck to you kid!”
“Hey!” Oukirii shouts. “I’ll find that book… Just you wait…”
Before leaving, she asks for the girl’s name. She answers “Valerie, why do you need to know?” Oukirii says that it’s just in case she wrote her name in the book. “Suppose I– Fair point?” Valerie responds.
You’d Entreat Valerie’s Book from a customer by Evercold’s Night Market.
Oukirii’s companion lies down on the floor. Valerie apologizes for acting like she did, and Oukirii forgives her immediately. She notices some tools on the wall and asks what those are for. Valerie says those are for her toolsmithing job. However, she wonders if that job is something even worth continuing. “Just doesn’t feel like my ‘right thing’.”
Oukirii gets to thinking. Being so young, she doesn’t fully understand what Valerie is saying. But she gets a better understanding by connecting it to finding her own purpose. It's hard to tell if she did the “right thing” by fleeing to complete this mission…
A Flashback occurs, A young Oukirii sits waiting in the living room while her mother and father try to make her look her best. The door opens, and somebody walks inside. Antànor Solana, Oukirii’s Grandfather. Dimitrius happily greets him, Antànor doesn’t say anything, But does the same to his son. He shakes Catalina’s hand and pats Oukirii on the head while facing away from her. He and Dimitrius walk forward, chatting about their hunts. Oukirii tries to shout something to her grandfather, but he doesn’t hear her…
After she and Valerie finish talking, Oukirii says that she’s off to hunt a beast. She describes Snow Gem to Valerie, who says “I’ve never heard of anything like that before…” Valerie tells Oukirii to wait up and grabs a hatchet from the wall, she says that she’ll be coming to hunt this thing too. She won’t let someone like her fight a beast unsupervised.
As Oukirii and Valerie walk, The ground begins to shake. They stop and stand still, Valerie asks “Did you feel that?” Oukirii wonders if the rumbling came from Snow Gem. Suddenly, the ground cracks underneath them. Sending Oukirii and her companion falling underground.
Oukirii is lying on the ground in a patch of snow. Her companion tries to wake her, Oukirii jolts up and looks around. “Thank the sun! Where’s Valerie?” Oukirii stands up after petting her companion. “This… Snow Gem… It must be…” She shakes her head.
Deepshiver Cave, Danger Level 27
“Stand back Valerie!” Oukirii and her companion step up, ready to confront the beast. “This is what I was made for… I won’t let you bring destruction to this world! Come on Snow Gem– It’s all over now!!”
BOSS: Snowradillo
(Boost Dialogue: “Here goes nothing!”)
Valerie dashes in and finishes off the beast with a large chop. It creates a strong wind as it fades away into nothing… “We did it!” Oukirii quietly says “That’s one down…” Valerie asks if Oukirii is alright, She says that she doesn’t know and explains that “I… I wish I could have known more about it. They say a hunter is supposed to read the hearts of all creatures they hunt. Is there something wrong with me?”
“Read the heart of it or not, you hunted that thing like a champion! Maybe you’re not looking in the right place kid, you could consider the idea of being a traveling hunter…”
“A traveling hunter?” Oukirii asks. She gives it some thought, before her companion reminds them that they need to head back to the town.
“It doesn’t work that way Oukirii…” Hansel replies “Destruction could still spell even if only one was still around… Our mission was to take down all three. The next target will be Red Spirit, I’ve found this creature to be in Redwater.”
Oukirii accepts to continue the mission and keep seeking her purpose. She and her companion excitedly leave town towards the next adventure.
Hansel and Valerie watch as they leave. Valerie says “I hope she finds her purpose out there. But there’s something I don’t quite understand. She seems like she doesn’t want to be strong. But then, why accept a mission that requires her to fight powerful monsters?”
“She wants to prove herself capable, and it’s a job only she can do. I’m grateful that she did accept, Otherwise the fate of the world might still be uncertain…”
(Ending Text)
Oukirii succeeds in her hunting of the first beast. Snowradillo of Evercold.
Two monsters remain as a threat to the world.
She keeps her heart optimistic, yet still finds herself troubled. With no definite answer to the question of her purpose…
With the guidance of the sun, Oukirii sets out to Redwater.
And prepares for a confrontation with Red Spirit…
——————
Oukirii the Hunter: Chapter 2, End.
submitted by TheAbsoluteBread to octopathtraveler [link] [comments]
(Completed Chapter 2s: Thearnt, Taland, Pascal, Harmony, Crowson, Asherah, Oukirii)
Next Chapter 2: Orlando the Starseer
Oukirii the Hunter, Chapter 2: Recommended Level 26
——————
(The Journey So Far…)
Events along Oukirii’s first hunt created damage in her family.
Her father came to realize that she had no intention of become a strong hunter on her own.
Even if she knew that, Oukirii couldn’t answer the question “Then what do you want to be?”
One evening, she had a dream of world’s destruction. A prophet came by the following day and told her of the beasts she saw that night.
Oukirii volunteered to hunt the beasts down, in hopes that this journey would reveal her true purpose to her…
Oukirii and Her Companion set foot in Evercold. The first thing Oukirii notes is the cold air of the snowy region. “You alright boy?” She crouches down and pets her companion on the head. It makes a joyful cry. “Hansel should be around here right?” Oukirii continues “He probably knows where we should go to look for Snow Gem!”
She takes a few steps forward, “This town is— very different from Oakbright…” Oukirii looks down. “Alright, Let’s go find Hansel!”
You’d be prompted to look for Hansel
- Travel Banter: My Nickname (Oukirii and Orlando) “Hey Kirie.” Orlando tries to get her attention. Oukirii freaks out and Orlando apologizes. Oukirii goes on to explain that her dad always called her Kirie. “That Dimitrius man, right?” Orlando asks. Oukirii tells Orlando a bit more about her father, before finally saying to him “You can call me Kirie if you want to.” Orlando makes sure that’s alright with her, and Oukirii says that it’s perfectly fine.
- Travel Banter: A Roaring Sword (Oukirii and Crowson) Oukirii notices Crowson and asks “What are you doing Mr. Crowson!?” He tells her that he’s just giving his sword a polish. Oukirii says “It’s shinier now, you did a good job!” Crowson goes quiet. “I’ve heard it roar through the air when you swing it!” Oukirii continues. He replies “It does do that. Now let us proceed.” Oukirii wonders what the hurry is for, Crowson tries to come up with an excuse, and settles on using the cold weather.
(Blanche’s Dialogue will change depending on if you’ve visited the ranch prior. “You look familiar”/”Who’re you? A hunter?”)
Blanche would go on to explain that she’s here to pick up supplies. She notices Oukirii’s companion and hands her a bag of food before grabbing onto the wagon again. Suzie would give Oukirii a nod as they leave.
As Oukirii puts away the bag, She notices Hansel standing near the path that Blanche and Suzie went along. Oukirii runs over to Hansel and tells him that she’s ready to take on Snow Gem.
Hansel is glad to hear it. He would tell Oukirii that this beast has been terrorizing the citizens of Evercold for a long time. “Hunting Snow Gem is not only important for our own sun-saving mission. It’s for the relief of all these people right here.”
“Well I’ll have to do my best then!”
“I believe in you Oukirii. I really do.”
Oukirii would walk away from Hansel and you’d head further into town. Oukirii suddenly hears the sound of someone shouting “No, Not again!” Her companion points his nose in the direction of the shouting and a curious Oukirii runs over to find a girl standing outside of her home. She asks if something’s wrong and the girl tells her that she lost a book she borrowed from the town’s library.
Oukirii volunteers to help look, the girl just laughs loudly “It’s nowhere I can find, best of luck to you kid!”
“Hey!” Oukirii shouts. “I’ll find that book… Just you wait…”
Before leaving, she asks for the girl’s name. She answers “Valerie, why do you need to know?” Oukirii says that it’s just in case she wrote her name in the book. “Suppose I– Fair point?” Valerie responds.
You’d Entreat Valerie’s Book from a customer by Evercold’s Night Market.
- Travel Banter: Valerie’s Missing Book (Oukirii and Asherah) Asherah remarks that Valerie must be extremely forgetful. But it’s hard not to feel bad for her. Oukirii says that it’s a good thing they showed up when they did, “Right, Helping people.” Asherah says. “Let’s just hope this pays off somehow.” Oukirii tells her that it will pay off in some way, Asherah asks “Do you believe in that sort of thing?” Oukirii says “Of course I do! Well— not if you don’t believe enough with me!”
Oukirii’s companion lies down on the floor. Valerie apologizes for acting like she did, and Oukirii forgives her immediately. She notices some tools on the wall and asks what those are for. Valerie says those are for her toolsmithing job. However, she wonders if that job is something even worth continuing. “Just doesn’t feel like my ‘right thing’.”
Oukirii gets to thinking. Being so young, she doesn’t fully understand what Valerie is saying. But she gets a better understanding by connecting it to finding her own purpose. It's hard to tell if she did the “right thing” by fleeing to complete this mission…
A Flashback occurs, A young Oukirii sits waiting in the living room while her mother and father try to make her look her best. The door opens, and somebody walks inside. Antànor Solana, Oukirii’s Grandfather. Dimitrius happily greets him, Antànor doesn’t say anything, But does the same to his son. He shakes Catalina’s hand and pats Oukirii on the head while facing away from her. He and Dimitrius walk forward, chatting about their hunts. Oukirii tries to shout something to her grandfather, but he doesn’t hear her…
After she and Valerie finish talking, Oukirii says that she’s off to hunt a beast. She describes Snow Gem to Valerie, who says “I’ve never heard of anything like that before…” Valerie tells Oukirii to wait up and grabs a hatchet from the wall, she says that she’ll be coming to hunt this thing too. She won’t let someone like her fight a beast unsupervised.
- Travel Banter: Dance Lessons (Oukirii and Harmony) Oukirii is lost in thought, Harmony gets her attention and offers to let her try out something new, Dancing! Wondering if it will help her find something to be passionate about. Oukirii doesn’t know what to think, Harmony talks with her about what it would be like to be a dancer. Oukirii says that stardom doesn’t sound like something she wants to strive for, but thanks Harmony for talking to her about her purpose in an uplifting way.
As Oukirii and Valerie walk, The ground begins to shake. They stop and stand still, Valerie asks “Did you feel that?” Oukirii wonders if the rumbling came from Snow Gem. Suddenly, the ground cracks underneath them. Sending Oukirii and her companion falling underground.
Oukirii is lying on the ground in a patch of snow. Her companion tries to wake her, Oukirii jolts up and looks around. “Thank the sun! Where’s Valerie?” Oukirii stands up after petting her companion. “This… Snow Gem… It must be…” She shakes her head.
Deepshiver Cave, Danger Level 27
- Travel Banter: Rough Landing! (Oukirii and Taland) “Agh…” Taland sounds in pain. Oukirii asks if he’s hurt. He replies “Who, Me? Not at all. It was like landing on a pillow! I did pull a muscle, but I’m more worried about you little sis.” Oukirii wonders “Huh? I’m not hurt.” Taland is ready to accept the answer until he points out her shivering. “You must have snow on ya still.” He teaches Oukirii to shake the snow out. Before they’re both ready to continue on.
“Stand back Valerie!” Oukirii and her companion step up, ready to confront the beast. “This is what I was made for… I won’t let you bring destruction to this world! Come on Snow Gem– It’s all over now!!”
BOSS: Snowradillo
(Boost Dialogue: “Here goes nothing!”)
Valerie dashes in and finishes off the beast with a large chop. It creates a strong wind as it fades away into nothing… “We did it!” Oukirii quietly says “That’s one down…” Valerie asks if Oukirii is alright, She says that she doesn’t know and explains that “I… I wish I could have known more about it. They say a hunter is supposed to read the hearts of all creatures they hunt. Is there something wrong with me?”
“Read the heart of it or not, you hunted that thing like a champion! Maybe you’re not looking in the right place kid, you could consider the idea of being a traveling hunter…”
“A traveling hunter?” Oukirii asks. She gives it some thought, before her companion reminds them that they need to head back to the town.
- Travel Banter: Church of the Sacred Sun (Oukirii and Thearnt) Oukirii asks Thearnt how different the Sacred Flame religion is compared to her own. Thearnt says that she was wondering the same thing. The two of them would have a long discussion about differences in their beliefs and customs. Draefendi being a god in one and a legendary hunter in the other, The Sun is believed as a spiritual concept while Aelfric is believed as an actual being, and how both religions have different things the followers shall and shall not do.
- Travel Banter: My Bedtime (Oukirii and Pascal) Oukirii is proud of her victory against the beast. “You did great.” Pascal congratulates her. Oukirii excitedly asks him if she can stay up later than usual now. Pascal tells her that he isn’t the one in the position to decide that, “Most of the time you’re knocked out early anyway.” He says, followed by silently thinking ”That’s when we usually go drink…” Oukirii pleads that she can stay up longer if she tries. Pascal tells her that he can talk about removing her suggested bedtime.
“It doesn’t work that way Oukirii…” Hansel replies “Destruction could still spell even if only one was still around… Our mission was to take down all three. The next target will be Red Spirit, I’ve found this creature to be in Redwater.”
Oukirii accepts to continue the mission and keep seeking her purpose. She and her companion excitedly leave town towards the next adventure.
Hansel and Valerie watch as they leave. Valerie says “I hope she finds her purpose out there. But there’s something I don’t quite understand. She seems like she doesn’t want to be strong. But then, why accept a mission that requires her to fight powerful monsters?”
“She wants to prove herself capable, and it’s a job only she can do. I’m grateful that she did accept, Otherwise the fate of the world might still be uncertain…”
(Ending Text)
Oukirii succeeds in her hunting of the first beast. Snowradillo of Evercold.
Two monsters remain as a threat to the world.
She keeps her heart optimistic, yet still finds herself troubled. With no definite answer to the question of her purpose…
With the guidance of the sun, Oukirii sets out to Redwater.
And prepares for a confrontation with Red Spirit…
——————
Oukirii the Hunter: Chapter 2, End.
2024.06.02 07:09 Watching_The_Trees Sienna buying experience April 2024
This all took place over the course of about 6 weeks. It was a little over two weeks until we were able to reserve a car and then had to wait another 4 weeks for delivery. My wife and I took turns reaching out to dealers in between work and kids.
What I would do differently
submitted by Watching_The_Trees to Sienna [link] [comments]
- Dealer 1 - $5k markup, non-negotiable, no Siennas on the lot and everything had a waitlist.
- Dealer 2 - Woodland, found car on toyota.com, started purchase online through Toyota’s SmartPath (the estimate you see online is what you’ll pay at the dealership). Received call immediately and said they would send over all the details so I can confirm and move forward. I thought this was strange since all the details, with OTD pricing was online. Six hours later they send a new price breakdown with an additional $5k markup. When I asked why the price changed they came back with a $2k markup for window tinting. I said MSRP and they said sales manager won’t go any lower since I am not local.
- Dealer 3 - XLE, MSRP price, but required GPS-based theft prevention add-on for $1,300, no deal.
- Dealer 4 - No cars available, reservations are only for locals, if you are out of town you can only buy what is on the lot
- Dealer 5 - MSRP, no add ons, 6-8 month waitlist, but will probably be sooner.
- Dealer 6 - XLE Sienna on lot, $3k markup. Dropped to $1k markup after I asked for MSRP. Back and forth was slow as both of us were busy, they ended up selling to someone else.
- Dealer 7 - 2 Siennas on lot (XLE & XSE), setup appointment and showed up the next day. (Website shows MSRP pricing) I show up the next day and there are no Siennas on the lot, but one coming in next week, which I can have for a $7k markup. I said MSRP and was told no way, so we left.
- Dealer 8 - XSE, MSRP pricing, but would have to have it shipped from the East Coast. Asked for dealer to pay shipping, but no dice. Felt like we could do better.
- Dealer 9 - Limited available, waitlist for other trims. Avoided question on dealer markups.
- Dealer 10 - XLE on lot. Antitheft required addition. Tried negotiating, but conversation petered out.
- Dealer 11 - XSE on lot with $2k markup, $1,200 theft prevention, and a few dealer options installed including paint protection. They weren’t negotiating.
- Dealer 12 - MSRP pricing, waitlist 6-12 months
- Dealer 13 - MSRP pricing, waitlist 6-12 months
- Dealer 14 - MSRP XSE available, however it came with the premium package and I didn’t want to pay for that.
- Dealer 15 - No Siennas available, said they usually sell them for above MSRP
- Dealer 16 - XSE available for reservation, but I had to do it in person. They kept providing ambiguous answers in regard to their pricing. It was a 3.5 hour drive for me, so I wasn’t going to go unless they provided some details. They promised to send over pricing info, but never sent it.
- Dealer 17 - XLE and Woodland available for reservation at MSRP (long drive for me, but doable). However paint protection and theft prevention are required for $1,300, not negotiable unless we did a trade in at a price that was thousands below my best offer elsewhere. Kept trying to negotiate, but they weren’t budging much. Finally salesman agreed to knock a few hundred dollars off, but sales manager said no. Surprised on this one, we thought we were going to make a deal and a few hundred apart they wouldn’t agree. We were honest with informing them we were considering another car that had more add-ons. They must have done some sleuthing through Toyota’s inventory with the car details we had shared and identified who we were talking to. They named the dealer in our conversation and bad-mouthed them, saying they would pull dirty tricks once we went to purchase the car. This deal fell apart at the finish line and left a bad impression on us.
- Dealer 18 - XLE and Woodland available for reservation. No dealer markup, but dealer installed options inflated the price. I could easily fly to this dealership on a cheap ticket, no BS from sales, so we agreed on MSRP price and placed a reservation.
What I would do differently
- Reach out to dealers over the phone instead of submitting requests online. This will just be a more efficient use of time . Half the time I was put in contact with someone who wasn’t a sales person and couldn’t provide the information I was looking for. A number of times I asked a question and it was ignored or side stepped. Sometimes I got no response from the internet team.
- Treat window tinting, paint protection, and theft prevention as a red flag. Any dealer who mentions one of these or has added it to their car, I would cross off my list and never talk to again. There are plenty of dealers who don’t do this and I think it is an easy tell that you don’t want to work with them. I didn’t have any good experiences when this was on the table.
- Negotiate harder on having dealer installed options removed that I don’t care about.
- See who is active on the No Markup Toyota Facebook page and talk to them first. I only had positive and productive interactions with the people on there.
- Focus on building a short list of dealers you want to work with and figuring out how they operate. Then i is a matter of checking in with them periodically, especially around allocation time.
2024.06.02 07:05 casterazucar I wrote and illustrated a 32 page kids book on then Remarkable 2, here's what I thought
So, I've got two young boys, and one of them is super into space, so I used my Remarkable 2 (primarily used for adult fiction planning and recipe creation) to write a picture book. Here are the pros and cons I ran into over the two months it took:
Kit used: Remarkable 2 (refurbished, £279) Marker Pro Type Folio (Purchased about a month ago)
PROS: - Marker is quite precise- precised enough to illustrate the broad strokes of a kids book, at least. I really liked the ability to used it at an angle to get different inputs
Conclusions:
For a tablet that is quite a few years old now, the level of support on this thing is FANTASTIC. While it is nowhere near perfect, the changes in productivity I've experienced are significant.
I hope they fix some of the export issues, those are pretty difficult to work around, but most of the others I've been able to figure out.
Any questions? Ask away!
submitted by casterazucar to RemarkableTablet [link] [comments]
Kit used: Remarkable 2 (refurbished, £279) Marker Pro Type Folio (Purchased about a month ago)
PROS: - Marker is quite precise- precised enough to illustrate the broad strokes of a kids book, at least. I really liked the ability to used it at an angle to get different inputs
- Layers- layers made it really easy to get all the detail I needed, without having to mess around with drawing super precisely.
- Pen choices - pen choices made it really easy to get the detail I needed (to a point)
- being able to draw normally (hand on the tablet, no worries with palm rejection etc)
- copy/paste/resize/invert - this for repeating patterns was awesome. Inverting a drawing was something I didn't know I could do until AGES after I started. Was a relief to have
- no distractions - not even a gimmick. This, having less has changed the way I work. Using it, I'm WAY more productive and focused. Though, sadly this hasn't spilled over into my other device usage. YouTube still sucks me in!
- I haven't been getting fatigued eyes as I do with a laptop
- nice design - it's a pleasure to use, and really nice to look at/hold etc. I want to use it, just to use it.
- lines! The draw and hold to make a straight line is great, really helped!
- Stroke limit! This one shocked me. On a page that was particularly detailed, I had the device freeze up on me momentarily, then give me a error message that I'd performed the maximum amount of marker strokes for the page, and that I'd have to remove some marker strokes. It kept on crashing, but I eventually managed to make the changes needed to fix it. I guess this is a RAM issue?
- SVG and PNG exporting is crappy, and marginally better from the desktop application- absolutely crushes any minor detail. PDF looks MUCH nicer, though is a limiting format. I'd love it if they could improve this, so it's more representative of what I've drawn
- I'd love pen sizes to stay small when zoomed in. Logically, when you zoom in the relative size of the pen is massive, even when it's small. Id love there to be an option, that when you zoom in, the pen size stays the same, regardless of the zoom.
- Lack of formatting options when typing/using the type folio - I'm not sure if I'm missing something, but not being able to set things like line spacing, or simply choosing where to type. I dont even need fonts/bold/italics etc, just less prescriptive writing options
- the eraser is shockingly imprecise, in all methods (circle to erase/draw erase/end of the pen erase). When you think you've erased it correctly, it either under or over erases. This must be able to be fixed in software?
- straight lines can be done, but can't be moved that precisely
- loading times- once the file got suitably massive, loading images started to take a long time (around 30 seconds) - but this is understandable given the fairly unreasonable amount of detail I was drawing
- if you're going to be colourizing the image like I did - do yourself a favour and DON'T colour them in with grey on the tablet. When you remove backgrounds in desktop software, the grey stays as a translucent layer, the white goes.
- pencil shading looks fairly awful with PNG/SVG export, just avoid it.
- want to draw something with detail? Draw big, then shrink it down. It'll look excellent. PNG export will shit all over it, but at least itll look cool while you do it
Conclusions:
For a tablet that is quite a few years old now, the level of support on this thing is FANTASTIC. While it is nowhere near perfect, the changes in productivity I've experienced are significant.
I hope they fix some of the export issues, those are pretty difficult to work around, but most of the others I've been able to figure out.
Any questions? Ask away!
2024.06.02 07:04 Mrsysreset How to find Winds Aloft FD (Canada)
So this may be a dumb question but when I did ground school last summer we used the AWWS to pull winds aloft (FD) for our practice planning but now that I am planning and doing the Navlog for my first actual cross country Friday and with the AWWS discontinued a few months ago I am looking at the CFPS I cant seem to find the charts other than the GFA style wind barbs. I would ask my CFI but he is on holidays until the day before the flight and I would like to show up as prepared as I can be so wanting to do practice ones for the days leading up to it. I am hoping I am just overlooking something simple. Any advise? First time doing a Navlog since the ground school practice ones and its harder than I thought it would be.
submitted by Mrsysreset to flying [link] [comments]
2024.06.02 07:03 Witty_Programmer_874 Hospital hot takes (questions at bottom)
So I was recently in a behavioral hospital for $uicidal thoughts and just was overall very overwhelmed by life.
I was surrounded by too many kids and several little kids (hey we're the worst ones in there), I hadn't set foot in a courtyard or anything for 6 days so I was going absolutely fucking crazy. I moved myself away by going into the hallway (we weren't authorized to be out of the day room until told) and went off on the staff about the last day I was in unit 1. They had this bright idea to move me to unit 3, much more quiet do it having 4 other people, I hung out around Eli, Brandon, and Jordan for the rest of my stay, I was the only girl in the unit. Later that day another girl with severe autism came, she cried every single day for her mom, she was probably around 250-70 Lbs, throwing temper tantrums in the floor, she hit our favorite tech over a snack (she wouldn't let her have one because the damn girl had stolen half of her pizza while she was in the bathroom and was given a snack like the rest of us), the guys i hung out with all had ADHD and amger issues so we all didnt like her due to what she did, we later figured out she stabbed her brother she was 13, my age.
I think a day or so later they had a new girl admitted, I was listening to her answer questions when she first came in (everyone had to answer the questions) because I got pissed off because I messed up on a poster because the amateur art director didn't give me an eraser with my bendy pencil, so I was walking up and down the hallway. I came back, day down and was talking to everyone because group therapy had started, I turned around and saw the autistic girl sitting there BREAKING MY BRAND NEW PACK OF CRAYONS THAT I HAD BEEN ASKING FOR, FOR 3 DAYS. I got so mad, went back to the hallway and kicked the emergency exit door (it had to be unlocked by staff), it flew open but quickly closed, then I started pacing again. As I was doing that I heard the nurse at her station on the phone asking my mom for consent for a script of 200mg of Seroquel, she refused and I have had horrible luck sleeping, I've had insomnia for 6 years now. Brandon came in the hallway to see if I was okay, followed by Eli. I then went to the nurses station to ask why my mom denied it, the nurse was very snarky and said "she said you were trying to play the system", I had a little blackout and punched and kicked Brandon's door because it was closest, I later discovered my mom didn't say this, the nurse was known for lying to us.
Everything died down and we were all chilling in the day room talking to our favorite tech, the new girl seemed to have some type of disability due to her speech and how she walked. I don't know how it got so escalated but the girl called Eli a nigga, she was very light skinned but Mexican so Eli not taking any shit from a person that obviously not black got up and was finna hit her but the tech made her shut up and calmed him down. Everything was fine until the next morning. We went to eat breakfast and came back, very quickly the girl started again and said nigger about 3 times. Eli got up and made her try to fight him because he knew she was doing it only because the tech was with us and he would seemingly not be able to do anything, but he went for her, the tech tried to hold him back and get the girl to stop, she went into the hallway. This units day room had two doors so he went out the opposite way and punched her, she started balling her eyes out because her nose bleed, not even a lot. We all later discovered she was in there for wanting to kill herself due to her traumatic brain injury. She was 15 and Eli was too, but was pretty tall compared to her.
Do you think Eli was in the wrong or did the right thing regarding him being obviously black and Porta Rican while she was a very light skinned Mexican and wasn't even in the facility for more than 17 hours? What's your opinion on the situation and circumstances? What would you have done if you were in there?
submitted by Witty_Programmer_874 to MentalHospitalChat [link] [comments]
I was surrounded by too many kids and several little kids (hey we're the worst ones in there), I hadn't set foot in a courtyard or anything for 6 days so I was going absolutely fucking crazy. I moved myself away by going into the hallway (we weren't authorized to be out of the day room until told) and went off on the staff about the last day I was in unit 1. They had this bright idea to move me to unit 3, much more quiet do it having 4 other people, I hung out around Eli, Brandon, and Jordan for the rest of my stay, I was the only girl in the unit. Later that day another girl with severe autism came, she cried every single day for her mom, she was probably around 250-70 Lbs, throwing temper tantrums in the floor, she hit our favorite tech over a snack (she wouldn't let her have one because the damn girl had stolen half of her pizza while she was in the bathroom and was given a snack like the rest of us), the guys i hung out with all had ADHD and amger issues so we all didnt like her due to what she did, we later figured out she stabbed her brother she was 13, my age.
I think a day or so later they had a new girl admitted, I was listening to her answer questions when she first came in (everyone had to answer the questions) because I got pissed off because I messed up on a poster because the amateur art director didn't give me an eraser with my bendy pencil, so I was walking up and down the hallway. I came back, day down and was talking to everyone because group therapy had started, I turned around and saw the autistic girl sitting there BREAKING MY BRAND NEW PACK OF CRAYONS THAT I HAD BEEN ASKING FOR, FOR 3 DAYS. I got so mad, went back to the hallway and kicked the emergency exit door (it had to be unlocked by staff), it flew open but quickly closed, then I started pacing again. As I was doing that I heard the nurse at her station on the phone asking my mom for consent for a script of 200mg of Seroquel, she refused and I have had horrible luck sleeping, I've had insomnia for 6 years now. Brandon came in the hallway to see if I was okay, followed by Eli. I then went to the nurses station to ask why my mom denied it, the nurse was very snarky and said "she said you were trying to play the system", I had a little blackout and punched and kicked Brandon's door because it was closest, I later discovered my mom didn't say this, the nurse was known for lying to us.
Everything died down and we were all chilling in the day room talking to our favorite tech, the new girl seemed to have some type of disability due to her speech and how she walked. I don't know how it got so escalated but the girl called Eli a nigga, she was very light skinned but Mexican so Eli not taking any shit from a person that obviously not black got up and was finna hit her but the tech made her shut up and calmed him down. Everything was fine until the next morning. We went to eat breakfast and came back, very quickly the girl started again and said nigger about 3 times. Eli got up and made her try to fight him because he knew she was doing it only because the tech was with us and he would seemingly not be able to do anything, but he went for her, the tech tried to hold him back and get the girl to stop, she went into the hallway. This units day room had two doors so he went out the opposite way and punched her, she started balling her eyes out because her nose bleed, not even a lot. We all later discovered she was in there for wanting to kill herself due to her traumatic brain injury. She was 15 and Eli was too, but was pretty tall compared to her.
Do you think Eli was in the wrong or did the right thing regarding him being obviously black and Porta Rican while she was a very light skinned Mexican and wasn't even in the facility for more than 17 hours? What's your opinion on the situation and circumstances? What would you have done if you were in there?
2024.06.02 07:02 Significant_Use1153 My female friend confessed to me (a gay man), please help!
this is a throwaway account, I don’t think any of my friends use reddit, but just for peace of mind, I guess. Sorry if this is written badly, i’m writing this right after it happed. I’ll try my best to answer any questions in the comments.
Some background first: My friend, here i’m calling her K, and I are both teenagers who share classes and are the same age. Over the last two years we’ve become close friends over shared interests: We’re both really into romance manga, otome games, similar games/media, etc., and we’re both in a quite close knit friend group. Since we’re both ‘hopeless romantics’ and are into romance stuff; We’ve had this running thing where we call each other pet names and we created characters who we shipped together and had variations on our names, etc. I guess I didn’t see it like that back then, but I guess that might’ve been considered leading her on, but i didn’t think of it like that. I just thought we were having fun writing together. We’re both quite bad at reading the room, but i’d say for different reasons. (mental illness/personality disorder for me, and i’d just say K grew up in an odd situation so she’s a bit childish with some things) I’ve only ever saw us as friends, but we are close enough to the point where she has cried to me over the phone multiple times.
She also knows I’m gay as i’ve mentioned it in passing, and since it’s pride month i’ve also added an mlm/gay flag bordeframe to my profile picture.
Today K messaged me telling me there’s a boy she had loved for a couple months, how they’re close, and how she wanted to tell him how she felt but she wasn’t sure. I almost immediately had a bad feeling about this, but went on with it. I asked the normal questions, (like if she thought that person would like her back, if he was in our school, etc.) but when I asked something along the lines of “what’s this person like?” she said “well I suppose i’d say he’s a lot like you?”
At this point i’m petty sure we both knew the other knew, but i was really panicking, so i avoided it for a couple messages and asked more questions. I didn’t want to drag it out, so in the end I just sent this: “K i’m just going to be upfront, I appreciate your feelings and i really do see you as a close friend, but I’m sorry I don’t feel the same way. I don’t swing that way, I hope you can understand. I hope this wont make things awkward between us, i really do want to stay friends.”
She agreed with me, saying things like “I want us to stay friends too” and “I’m okay with this”. I thought that was the end of it, but then she sent the following:
“i just want you to know that i will always love you no matter what. no matter what you think of me, no matter if you marry and love someone else. i want to always be there for you even if its only as a friend forever. you’re the most beautiful man in the world. no character could ever be as beautiful as you. yeah its okay i understand”
I feel a bit uncomfortable reading this, but as of now I haven’t responded. K has a really low self esteem due to a variety of reasons, and it’s gotten really bad in the recent past; to the point where me and the rest of our small friend group confronted hehad an ‘intervention’ so to speak about how we were really worried, and wanted her to seek help/her to know that we were always here for her. I’m worried that my rejection will make this worse, but I also don’t t want to just date her out of pity. I’ll probably be seeing her throughout the next week for school, but summer break for us is also in two weeks.
Please help!
submitted by Significant_Use1153 to Advice [link] [comments]
Some background first: My friend, here i’m calling her K, and I are both teenagers who share classes and are the same age. Over the last two years we’ve become close friends over shared interests: We’re both really into romance manga, otome games, similar games/media, etc., and we’re both in a quite close knit friend group. Since we’re both ‘hopeless romantics’ and are into romance stuff; We’ve had this running thing where we call each other pet names and we created characters who we shipped together and had variations on our names, etc. I guess I didn’t see it like that back then, but I guess that might’ve been considered leading her on, but i didn’t think of it like that. I just thought we were having fun writing together. We’re both quite bad at reading the room, but i’d say for different reasons. (mental illness/personality disorder for me, and i’d just say K grew up in an odd situation so she’s a bit childish with some things) I’ve only ever saw us as friends, but we are close enough to the point where she has cried to me over the phone multiple times.
She also knows I’m gay as i’ve mentioned it in passing, and since it’s pride month i’ve also added an mlm/gay flag bordeframe to my profile picture.
Today K messaged me telling me there’s a boy she had loved for a couple months, how they’re close, and how she wanted to tell him how she felt but she wasn’t sure. I almost immediately had a bad feeling about this, but went on with it. I asked the normal questions, (like if she thought that person would like her back, if he was in our school, etc.) but when I asked something along the lines of “what’s this person like?” she said “well I suppose i’d say he’s a lot like you?”
At this point i’m petty sure we both knew the other knew, but i was really panicking, so i avoided it for a couple messages and asked more questions. I didn’t want to drag it out, so in the end I just sent this: “K i’m just going to be upfront, I appreciate your feelings and i really do see you as a close friend, but I’m sorry I don’t feel the same way. I don’t swing that way, I hope you can understand. I hope this wont make things awkward between us, i really do want to stay friends.”
She agreed with me, saying things like “I want us to stay friends too” and “I’m okay with this”. I thought that was the end of it, but then she sent the following:
“i just want you to know that i will always love you no matter what. no matter what you think of me, no matter if you marry and love someone else. i want to always be there for you even if its only as a friend forever. you’re the most beautiful man in the world. no character could ever be as beautiful as you. yeah its okay i understand”
I feel a bit uncomfortable reading this, but as of now I haven’t responded. K has a really low self esteem due to a variety of reasons, and it’s gotten really bad in the recent past; to the point where me and the rest of our small friend group confronted hehad an ‘intervention’ so to speak about how we were really worried, and wanted her to seek help/her to know that we were always here for her. I’m worried that my rejection will make this worse, but I also don’t t want to just date her out of pity. I’ll probably be seeing her throughout the next week for school, but summer break for us is also in two weeks.
Please help!
2024.06.02 07:01 631x What questions to ask?
My mom has heavily smoked most of her life. She drank too. She developed a horrendous cough this past winter and chalked it up to a cold. Took her to the Caribbean for her 60th and the cough was still persistent months later. She was supposed to fly in and visit for Memorial Day but cancelled her flight due to extreme pain.. it ended up being kidney stones. She passed one so far.
A few days ago, she went to the ER because of more pain, and they did a CT scan which showed cancer in her lung and it looked like it had spread to her back bones, ribs, and most of her whole left side.
An oncologist scheduled her first appointment for Monday.
My mom currently doesn't have health insurance. She is still in shock and I think has the paperwork to apply for insurance through the state.
All that aside, what are the questions you asked, or forgot to ask, or wish you asked? What should be asked? I started researching and now I'm spiraling with so much to take in. I need some kind of guidance here.
submitted by 631x to cancer [link] [comments]
A few days ago, she went to the ER because of more pain, and they did a CT scan which showed cancer in her lung and it looked like it had spread to her back bones, ribs, and most of her whole left side.
An oncologist scheduled her first appointment for Monday.
My mom currently doesn't have health insurance. She is still in shock and I think has the paperwork to apply for insurance through the state.
All that aside, what are the questions you asked, or forgot to ask, or wish you asked? What should be asked? I started researching and now I'm spiraling with so much to take in. I need some kind of guidance here.
- What does genetic testing do?
- How do you pick a good oncologist / hospital?
- Radiation vs chemo, when and why?
- What questions should I be asking?
- How does all of this work?
- What is the normal process?
- ??? I think I'm spiraling again
2024.06.02 07:01 SharkEva Would I would be the jerk if I chose a opportunity over my church?
I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/OpiumKao posting in AmITheJerk
Concluded as per OOP
2 updates - Long
Original - 276th May 2024
Update1 - 28th May 2024
Update2 - 31st May 2024
Would I would be the jerk if I chose a opportunity over my church?
I (20F) have played cello since I was in 6th grade. I am generally good at it to say the least but average since I'm better at acedamics and art than playing my cello. My parents are very religious and we live in a a town a little bit away from a city.
Cause of some stupid reasons, I am the only cello still willing to work ar our church. I get played but I only get payed $12 for a 3 sometimes 4 hour performance. While I was practicing some art my friend (21M) called me, and said that a new place in our town was opening up and they needed a second teacher for the cello classes. I immediately went over and have been working there for a little over a month. While there the small school's principal managed to get my class a place in a orchestra concert in the city. It wasn't in the center just at the edge but my students were really excited. When we arrived. I played with my students a little bit for practice. The concert had went really well and I really enjoyed it.
Due to this. A man around 40 had walked up to me after the concert. He said he had heard me playing with my students and asked if I could play in a huge orchestra in around the center of the city. I was really interested since this could get good opportunities in both art and cello.
There is a bit of problem though. My parents had asked me before if I could play at my church on the same day of the concert ant at a uncomfortable amount of time gap. I didn't agree to it and said I would think about it. But now I really am concerned. I care about my parents and I enjoy my church. But I will get good opportunities at the big concert and they are willing to pay me $20 and hour if I play and help set up.
The problem with the church concert is that it will be 3 hours long and they actually are only going to pay me $15 for setting up AND playing the 3 hours which I am not very comfortable with.
So? Would I be the jerk if I chose an opportunity over my church?
TLDR; I got a good opportunity to play in a concert in around the center of the city. But on the same day is my church's concert. The concert is willing to pay $20 an hour for my troubles. While my church is going to only pay me $15 for setting up AND playing the 3 hours.
Comments
maroongrad
Church is taking advantage of you and I'm sure you're not rolling in money. The church will survive without a cello player.
madogvelkor
Yeah. And a lot of people play/sing for free or cheap at their church for personal reasons. My grandfather wasn't even really Catholic but he sang in the choir and my grandmother (who was devout Catholic) played the organ. He hated church but loved singing church music.
That said, it's about personal choice. If you need the money and aren't just playing for your own love of the music then go for the orchestra.
Update - 1 day later
A couple hours earlier I told my parents. To say my mom was angry was on understatement. She yelled and screamed at me that she had already told the church that I was going to play at the church. And they needed me there. I reminded her about what I said before when she asked. When my mom figured out I wasn't going to change my mind, she threatened to take my devices. Like seriously? I may for them. I reminded her that. But she didn't care. She continued screaming until she reached my room and started grabbing my phone. Art tablet. Laptop. PS5. EVERYTHING.
While doing so my dad joined in on my mom's side and told me I was making them look bad to the church. Before she even walked out the room. I started calling my dad's parents. Telling them what going on. While my mom was still screaming and yelling while taking my stuff into her room telling me I'm not getting them back until our next concert. Which was literally a week away. My paternal grandfather entered our house with his spare key and started screaming and my mom to put my stuff back in my room before he takes HER phone.
My mother, being the always scared of my grandfather person that she is. She put all my stuff in my room, but before she could. He told her to put my stuff in his truck. Which she had to do all by herself. My dad was forced to apologize to me and then my mother. It was obviously 1/2-hearted but I was just pleased they were forced to apologize.
I am currently at my grandparents place, and the reason this happened so late is cause I went on a shopping spree with my grandmother and her friends. They are the sweetest ladies ever. And I had alot of fun. I even able to buy another music piece its a little simple for my liking but I like the beat.
Just a quick update. We just got back and my grandparents are downstairs drinking and stuff, talking about their youthful days. My grandfather said feel free to take his truck to a friends place. So I'm about to do that after the post. Thanks for the support from the last post everyone 💓 thank you
Comments
LeekNeat9525
Good on you OP for not backing down for this amazing opportunity, and I hope the orchestra works out for you!
lululululululululi
Ditto and true delight to hear that your grandparents are awesome
Update - 2 days later
My parents are insane. Alot has happened so bare with me.
The day after my post I got a call for the man I the opportunity with, he sounded pissed. He asked if I was a minor. But first I asked how he got my number. He told me he got a call from my parents saying that I am a minor and as their guardian they will not allow me to play in the orchestra. As a side note. I am 20F, but due to genetics I look like around 16-17.
I told him I am not a minor but he seemed to believe my parents over me and he sent me a screenshot of my birth certificate... Those crazy people gave them a fake certificate that made it look like I was 16. He said due to no minors being allowed in the orchestra, my seat will be removed only if I can verify if I am not a minor.
I tried to convince him with my ID but he said that my parents told him I would show them a fake ID and I will be getting removed from the orchestra and he hung up.
Me. In tears, told my grandparents and they were not happy. Especially my grandmother. Another side note, my grandmother's mother was a cello player, but due to a accident she died when she was 29. So to find out I couldn't play my instrument anymore in this orchestra she was beyond to the point SHE ACTUALLY DRIVED. My grandmother rarely drives.
After the drive my grandmother had a screaming match with both my parents while my grandfather went to the place of the orchestra to get me verified for my seat again. I was a mess the whole way. We managed after 3 hours to get me verified but by then when we got back my grandmother was chewing out my dad and mom while they sat quietly.
The next day was the most satisfying thing I've ever felt
I found out my parents will be taking me out their will. The will that my GRANDPARENTS practically control since my grandparents pay half their bills. A couple minutes after. My grandparents called them and them that if they take me out their will, they will remove my dad out their will and give all the assets to me including the will they will already planning to give me, which was already a lump some of money and some rent houses they own.
My parents are trying to hold their ground, but a couple hours later they said they will also not be paying the bills they have been paying.
Then finally after those two threats. They are still trying to hold their ground. My grandparents have two other children, both daughters and older than my father, so I'm not surprised if they instead give them the assets instead of me.
My father called my two hours ago and called me a failure to my family and their church. Personally I thought that would hurt. But I didn't feel much. More like?... Relief! I felt so RELIEVED! I never felt this way before and I might actually ask them to disown me. I'm sick and tired of their trash and how many things I have done for that church and STILL be underpaid!
Hopefully this will be my last update but ask questions in the comments and I may answer. I just want to get this behind me.
Comments
LibraryMouse4321
Anyone who chooses the church over their children is a huge AH and doesn’t deserve children. Your parents are awful and if they were mine, I wouldn’t want anything to do with them.
ProfessionSanity
Yep, the whole "Thy shalt not bear false witness" flew right over their heads.
Scruffersdad
I love your grandparents! And go you! I’m glad you’ll get to play in the orchestra anyway.
I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments
submitted by SharkEva to BORUpdates [link] [comments]
Concluded as per OOP
2 updates - Long
Original - 276th May 2024
Update1 - 28th May 2024
Update2 - 31st May 2024
Would I would be the jerk if I chose a opportunity over my church?
I (20F) have played cello since I was in 6th grade. I am generally good at it to say the least but average since I'm better at acedamics and art than playing my cello. My parents are very religious and we live in a a town a little bit away from a city.
Cause of some stupid reasons, I am the only cello still willing to work ar our church. I get played but I only get payed $12 for a 3 sometimes 4 hour performance. While I was practicing some art my friend (21M) called me, and said that a new place in our town was opening up and they needed a second teacher for the cello classes. I immediately went over and have been working there for a little over a month. While there the small school's principal managed to get my class a place in a orchestra concert in the city. It wasn't in the center just at the edge but my students were really excited. When we arrived. I played with my students a little bit for practice. The concert had went really well and I really enjoyed it.
Due to this. A man around 40 had walked up to me after the concert. He said he had heard me playing with my students and asked if I could play in a huge orchestra in around the center of the city. I was really interested since this could get good opportunities in both art and cello.
There is a bit of problem though. My parents had asked me before if I could play at my church on the same day of the concert ant at a uncomfortable amount of time gap. I didn't agree to it and said I would think about it. But now I really am concerned. I care about my parents and I enjoy my church. But I will get good opportunities at the big concert and they are willing to pay me $20 and hour if I play and help set up.
The problem with the church concert is that it will be 3 hours long and they actually are only going to pay me $15 for setting up AND playing the 3 hours which I am not very comfortable with.
So? Would I be the jerk if I chose an opportunity over my church?
TLDR; I got a good opportunity to play in a concert in around the center of the city. But on the same day is my church's concert. The concert is willing to pay $20 an hour for my troubles. While my church is going to only pay me $15 for setting up AND playing the 3 hours.
Comments
maroongrad
Church is taking advantage of you and I'm sure you're not rolling in money. The church will survive without a cello player.
madogvelkor
Yeah. And a lot of people play/sing for free or cheap at their church for personal reasons. My grandfather wasn't even really Catholic but he sang in the choir and my grandmother (who was devout Catholic) played the organ. He hated church but loved singing church music.
That said, it's about personal choice. If you need the money and aren't just playing for your own love of the music then go for the orchestra.
OOP: I just have to say wow. I know its only been a couple hours. But I just have to thank you all for the advice. I have constantly been looking through your comments and I may reply to some. Not all. But definitely Atleast 10. So thank you for your support.
Edit: I'm going to tell them. I don't know how they will react but I am. The concert is on Sunday so this will be kinda in advance. I really do feel bad about it though
Update - 1 day later
A couple hours earlier I told my parents. To say my mom was angry was on understatement. She yelled and screamed at me that she had already told the church that I was going to play at the church. And they needed me there. I reminded her about what I said before when she asked. When my mom figured out I wasn't going to change my mind, she threatened to take my devices. Like seriously? I may for them. I reminded her that. But she didn't care. She continued screaming until she reached my room and started grabbing my phone. Art tablet. Laptop. PS5. EVERYTHING.
While doing so my dad joined in on my mom's side and told me I was making them look bad to the church. Before she even walked out the room. I started calling my dad's parents. Telling them what going on. While my mom was still screaming and yelling while taking my stuff into her room telling me I'm not getting them back until our next concert. Which was literally a week away. My paternal grandfather entered our house with his spare key and started screaming and my mom to put my stuff back in my room before he takes HER phone.
My mother, being the always scared of my grandfather person that she is. She put all my stuff in my room, but before she could. He told her to put my stuff in his truck. Which she had to do all by herself. My dad was forced to apologize to me and then my mother. It was obviously 1/2-hearted but I was just pleased they were forced to apologize.
I am currently at my grandparents place, and the reason this happened so late is cause I went on a shopping spree with my grandmother and her friends. They are the sweetest ladies ever. And I had alot of fun. I even able to buy another music piece its a little simple for my liking but I like the beat.
Just a quick update. We just got back and my grandparents are downstairs drinking and stuff, talking about their youthful days. My grandfather said feel free to take his truck to a friends place. So I'm about to do that after the post. Thanks for the support from the last post everyone 💓 thank you
Comments
LeekNeat9525
Good on you OP for not backing down for this amazing opportunity, and I hope the orchestra works out for you!
lululululululululi
Ditto and true delight to hear that your grandparents are awesome
Update - 2 days later
My parents are insane. Alot has happened so bare with me.
The day after my post I got a call for the man I the opportunity with, he sounded pissed. He asked if I was a minor. But first I asked how he got my number. He told me he got a call from my parents saying that I am a minor and as their guardian they will not allow me to play in the orchestra. As a side note. I am 20F, but due to genetics I look like around 16-17.
I told him I am not a minor but he seemed to believe my parents over me and he sent me a screenshot of my birth certificate... Those crazy people gave them a fake certificate that made it look like I was 16. He said due to no minors being allowed in the orchestra, my seat will be removed only if I can verify if I am not a minor.
I tried to convince him with my ID but he said that my parents told him I would show them a fake ID and I will be getting removed from the orchestra and he hung up.
Me. In tears, told my grandparents and they were not happy. Especially my grandmother. Another side note, my grandmother's mother was a cello player, but due to a accident she died when she was 29. So to find out I couldn't play my instrument anymore in this orchestra she was beyond to the point SHE ACTUALLY DRIVED. My grandmother rarely drives.
After the drive my grandmother had a screaming match with both my parents while my grandfather went to the place of the orchestra to get me verified for my seat again. I was a mess the whole way. We managed after 3 hours to get me verified but by then when we got back my grandmother was chewing out my dad and mom while they sat quietly.
The next day was the most satisfying thing I've ever felt
I found out my parents will be taking me out their will. The will that my GRANDPARENTS practically control since my grandparents pay half their bills. A couple minutes after. My grandparents called them and them that if they take me out their will, they will remove my dad out their will and give all the assets to me including the will they will already planning to give me, which was already a lump some of money and some rent houses they own.
My parents are trying to hold their ground, but a couple hours later they said they will also not be paying the bills they have been paying.
Then finally after those two threats. They are still trying to hold their ground. My grandparents have two other children, both daughters and older than my father, so I'm not surprised if they instead give them the assets instead of me.
My father called my two hours ago and called me a failure to my family and their church. Personally I thought that would hurt. But I didn't feel much. More like?... Relief! I felt so RELIEVED! I never felt this way before and I might actually ask them to disown me. I'm sick and tired of their trash and how many things I have done for that church and STILL be underpaid!
Hopefully this will be my last update but ask questions in the comments and I may answer. I just want to get this behind me.
Comments
LibraryMouse4321
Anyone who chooses the church over their children is a huge AH and doesn’t deserve children. Your parents are awful and if they were mine, I wouldn’t want anything to do with them.
ProfessionSanity
Yep, the whole "Thy shalt not bear false witness" flew right over their heads.
Scruffersdad
I love your grandparents! And go you! I’m glad you’ll get to play in the orchestra anyway.
I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments
2024.06.02 07:00 ReverseMod Daily Questions Megathread - June 02, 2024
Welcome to the Reverse: 1999 Daily Questions Megathread!
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2024.06.02 07:00 AutoModerator June Monthly Meta Feedback Thread - Post Your Feedback Requests Here
Hello thesidehustle community! It's time for our {{date %B}} Monthly Meta Feedback Thread. This is the perfect opportunity to get constructive criticism and helpful feedback on your side hustle projects.
Whether you're just starting out or looking to improve, this thread is for you. Please follow the rules and guidelines below when posting your feedback requests.
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submitted by AutoModerator to thesidehustle [link] [comments]
Whether you're just starting out or looking to improve, this thread is for you. Please follow the rules and guidelines below when posting your feedback requests.
Let's help each other grow and succeed!
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2024.06.02 07:00 AutoModerator Daily Questions Megathread (June 02, 2024)
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submitted by AutoModerator to classicwow [link] [comments]
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2024.06.02 06:58 Noir888 Mafia suggestion
I hope the devs will see this one, IMO the mafia update is one of the best updates for the game but in its current state, its severely lacking.
Add illegal business
The crimes tab is bit of lacking as of now, and the way the "ranks" within a mafia family are partaking in those illicit activities are kinda awkward, Caporegimes stealing cars? the Godfather personally extorting a business? that's unrealistic, I suggest that "wet work" types of crimes should only be reserved for the associates and the soldiers, while the the Caporegimes can start or set up illegal business', like the following:
Second, the Capos can set up the business' independently or the higher ups orders a certain business to be operated.
Third, a maximum of 5 business' should only be allowed for each Capo (if the player Capo has 5 gambling dens but the higher ups wants to set up a drug trafficking business, one of the gambling dens should be demolished.)
Fourth, the generating income for the player Capo from those business will be similar to how the family takes cuts from the crimes tabs
Fifth, a maximum of only 3 (+1 if you reach the Capo rank) capos for a mafia family and 5 (+1 if you reach the Capo rank) Capos for the Sicilian Mafia.
Sixth, each business will have varying "sizes", for example before you can set up the business you have to choose how big the operation would be, a small gambling den? a large drug trafficking ring? and each "sizes" will correspond to generated profit, a small gambling den will generate less profit compared to medium size one etc. and each "size" will also generate "heat" for your character Capo, the smaller the operation the lesser "heat" generated.
Lastly, like I said in the beginning, the associates & soldiers, each of them will be assigned in to a Capo, and the Capo can delegate "wet work" types of crimes for each of them.
Rank Options:
Associates
The typical stuff from the crime tabs:
They will also get random orders from a made guy (not necessarily from a Capo.)
Salary: similar to how the players take a cut from performing crimes
Soldiers
Aside from the typical stuff, the Soldiers should be able to have "perform a hit" crime in the crimes tab, it can only be done thrice a year and each hit will be difficult than the last, it has high chance of getting caught but if successful it will improve your standing within the mob by a large degree (the payout should also be good, no pay cuts you take the full amount of the money being rewarded)
Caporegimes
They will also get a random orders from the Underboss or rarely from the godfathegodmother.
Underboss
In the mob, the Underboss is sometimes called the streetboss, because they oversee the entirety of the operations of the mob on a daily basis, he directly reports to the boss/godfather, so basing on that, the following options should be added into the game
The GodfatheGodmother
Day job
This option should be included, this will also be a good way to avoid police attention in-game or decrease your "heat", its awkward to see a unemployed schlep making millions of dollars every year and not get caught by the IRS or something lmao,
"Heat" system
For every crime you commit there a corresponding level of heat added to the character's overall "heat", the more serious the crime the more likely the police/feds will target you
Bodyguard system
As I observed in the game, you can easily whack anyone in your family, this should not be, by adding bodyguards, the chances of your success will decrease exponentially
The only sure-fire way to "whack" a family member is using the "put a contract" tab, the bodyguard system will not be in effect, because as the Godfather, every family member would obey you no question.
Mafia Wars
During a mafia war, business will generate lesser profits (or will even close down), the heat from the police will be much higher & funds will quickly diminish.
There will be only two ways to win a mafia war depending on the justification you chose, these will be:
Eliminate Competition
If you win the "take over their business" option, your illegal business will triple their profits, the rival family will be weakened, the police will be more wary of your crime family there's a big chance of rats & stings operations.
If other Crime Families sided with you during the war & you won, you will have to compensate them for 40 million
Ways to lose a mafia war
Some Factors in winning a Mafia War
Your family and friends should be wary of you being a mobster, for example, you mother or sister found out that your character is actually a mafia soldier, this will make them disown you, your relationships with them will instantly go to 0 & your happiness will also take a dive.
And the interactions within the mafia family should follow the hierarchy (For example, no associate should be able to directly access the GodfatheGodmother and ask him/her out to go and watch a concert of Lady Gaga lol)
Random Events
Random events should be according to your rank, for example, you're the current Mafia Godfather random events should be in line to your rank, a random guy suddenly insults you on the streets, there should be an option like putting a contract on his/her life or have your soldiers whack him/her or a celebrity starting a "beef" with you, you can either order your men to kill him or just order them beat him up.
Rival Gangs
If you choose to be in the Italian Mafia, your rivals should be the other gangs like Russian Mafia, Yakuza, Triad, Lating Mafia etc and If you're in Sicily, the rival family will be another Sicilian Mafia (i.e You're family is the Visconti Family your rivals will be another Sicilian family)
There should be also family rankings, for example, the Italian Mafia is the current most powerful crime syndicate in the city, followed by the Russian Mafia, followed by the Latin Mafia etc the rankings can change yearly depending on how much muscle (number of soldiers) & income of the families earn, you can also be the most powerful crime family for 10 years if you won a mafia war. If you choose to start a Mafia War the other families can join sides, for example the Italian Mafia waged a war against the Yakuza, the other families will join which side they want, or if you formed an alliance with another mafia family, they will side with you during the war no matter what.
So what do you guys think? You guys can add more of your ideas here.
submitted by Noir888 to BitLifeApp [link] [comments]
Add illegal business
The crimes tab is bit of lacking as of now, and the way the "ranks" within a mafia family are partaking in those illicit activities are kinda awkward, Caporegimes stealing cars? the Godfather personally extorting a business? that's unrealistic, I suggest that "wet work" types of crimes should only be reserved for the associates and the soldiers, while the the Caporegimes can start or set up illegal business', like the following:
- Gambling Den
- Prostitution ring
- Pornography Studio
- Drug Trafficking
- Loan Sharking
- Smuggling
- Arms Trafficking
- Labor Racketeering
Second, the Capos can set up the business' independently or the higher ups orders a certain business to be operated.
Third, a maximum of 5 business' should only be allowed for each Capo (if the player Capo has 5 gambling dens but the higher ups wants to set up a drug trafficking business, one of the gambling dens should be demolished.)
Fourth, the generating income for the player Capo from those business will be similar to how the family takes cuts from the crimes tabs
Fifth, a maximum of only 3 (+1 if you reach the Capo rank) capos for a mafia family and 5 (+1 if you reach the Capo rank) Capos for the Sicilian Mafia.
Sixth, each business will have varying "sizes", for example before you can set up the business you have to choose how big the operation would be, a small gambling den? a large drug trafficking ring? and each "sizes" will correspond to generated profit, a small gambling den will generate less profit compared to medium size one etc. and each "size" will also generate "heat" for your character Capo, the smaller the operation the lesser "heat" generated.
Lastly, like I said in the beginning, the associates & soldiers, each of them will be assigned in to a Capo, and the Capo can delegate "wet work" types of crimes for each of them.
Rank Options:
Associates
The typical stuff from the crime tabs:
- Bank Robbery
- Burglary
- Extortion (no "whack" option)
- GTA
- Pickpocket
- Porch Pirate
- Shoplift
- Train Robbery
They will also get random orders from a made guy (not necessarily from a Capo.)
Salary: similar to how the players take a cut from performing crimes
Soldiers
Aside from the typical stuff, the Soldiers should be able to have "perform a hit" crime in the crimes tab, it can only be done thrice a year and each hit will be difficult than the last, it has high chance of getting caught but if successful it will improve your standing within the mob by a large degree (the payout should also be good, no pay cuts you take the full amount of the money being rewarded)
- Ability to recruit Associates (if a current associate dies or have been promoted into a made man, you can able to recruit a associate to fill in a spot)
- They will also get a random orders from the Capo only
Caporegimes
- Set up illegal business
- Bribe city officials (another way to reduce police attention, success depends on the character's notoriety, the higher the notoriety the lesser chance of success)
- Assign work (this is for the associates & soldiers)
- Propose/recommend an associate (the capo recommends an associate to be made, the success depends on the relationship of the player capo to the underboss & the godfathegodmother)
- Settle disputes (this will improve the income of your crew, settle any disputes among the soldiers & associates or sort out any grudges)
- Do favors (you can grant favors to to local people, like a school teacher, a lawyer, a small business owner or even a municipal judge etc, you can later "cash in" with these favors, may it be monetary value for the family, legal protection or personal wealth etc.)
They will also get a random orders from the Underboss or rarely from the godfathegodmother.
Underboss
In the mob, the Underboss is sometimes called the streetboss, because they oversee the entirety of the operations of the mob on a daily basis, he directly reports to the boss/godfather, so basing on that, the following options should be added into the game
- Collect contributions/tribute (this is for the illegal business', this is only available once a year)
- Add a business (You'll order a Capo to operate a certain business)
- Propose a Soldier (same with the "propose/recommend an associate" option in the Capo rank but this time when a Capo dies a Soldier will be promoted to a Capo)
- Delegate a hit (when the godfathegodfather orders a hit the underboss will delegate it with one of their capos, the success depends on the capos intellect & willpower)
- Perform charity (at the behest of the godfathegodmother, you'll perform charity works to lower down the police attention of the family, lesser sting operations, lesser rats popping up. Just like the "bribe a judge" option, charity foundations will also be reluctant to accept funds if your heat/notoriety levels are too high)
- Bribe a judge (to protect family members from prosecution, depending the amount of money being given, the maximum years of legal protection will be 15, for example a soldier got caught murdering a rival family soldier, if the Underboss bribed a judge, the family soldier will not be convicted. the success of the bribe depends on the Underboss' "Heat"/Notoriety level, the higher the heat/notoriety the lesser chance the bribe will be successful, if yo fail to bribe a judge, you can be also arrested and tried)
- Procure weapons (Distribute weapons to each of the crews, it may be small handguns, shotguns or even assault rifles, this will increase protection of the business' and of the members of the family from the rival family during mafia wars, this option should available during peace time & mafia wars)
- Will also get a random orders from the GodfatheGodmother
The GodfatheGodmother
- Wage a mafia war against your rival family, there will be two sub options for this part, the justifications will either be "eliminate competition" (total destruction of the rival crime family) or "take over their business"(a "skirmish" type of conflict, instead of eliminating the rival family you instead take some of the "turfs") AI GodfatheGodmother should be able to wage a mafia war
- When a mafia war is ongoing, there will also be options for the GodfatheGodmother to pick, like "destroy rivals business", "take out their soldiers", "raid a rivals business" (unlike the destroy one, your soldiers will only raid for money), "order the hit of the boss of the rival family", "call for political support" (this basically calling on the police to take your side against your rivals, this is only available when you have a political ally, and depending on the position of your political ally if your political ally is a senator he/she can instantly imprison majority of the members of the rival family, if your political ally is the mayor of the city the only thing he/she can is increase the sting operations of the rival family), "ensue peace" (this can go both ways, when you lost the war you can still ensue peace, but the consequence will be either you're will be removed as the boss or worse be killed, and when you win, depending the choice you made for the cause of the war, you will be rewarded handsomely and a chance your rival family will be wiped out)
- Form alliance (Instead of going to war, you can also have the option end the rivalry between the families and start an alliance, work together in terms of business, this will generate bigger profits for your family but the downside is the police/feds will be now more active to take you down, more sting operations, more rats popping up)
- Support a local politician ( sub options are "fund a his/her election campaign" (or you can go to a more devious plot like rigging the elections), "eliminate his/her political enemies", "give a gift" etc, after gaining a political ally, you can now use him/her for your own ends, like "ask for political protection", "clean criminal records" etc.
- Support a national politician, same as the "support a local politician", besides the basic benefits, the benefits you receive if your national political bet wins (senator or presidency) your heat will be erased, no sting operations, no rats, if caught by the authorities the charges will be dropped and lastly if your character is engaged in a mob war, this political ally can instantly imprison the majority of the members of the rival family, thus increasing your chance in winning in a mob war. Downside is its much harder for your political bet to win, if you want a successful results or chance to win, either rig the elections (high risk of getting caught) or contribute 250 million into his/her campaign
- Order a business to be operated (same as the Underboss option)
- Put out a hit/put a contract (you can choose anyone from relatives, enemies, random people, friends and anyone in the family)
- Promote an underboss (when the current underboss dies, you can instantly promote any Capo for that position)
- Policy making (The GodfatheGodmother dictates on how the family runs its "business'" and passes certain "laws" within the family, for example, you can outright ban the drug trafficking business to reduce heat from the authorities or only men can join the family vice versa)
- Appoint front boss (appoint a "front boss" to insulate yourself from the feds/authorities, if your political bets didn't win the election you may choose this option instead, it lowers your heat/notoriety levels, lesser sting operations waged against you, and even if a sting operation is successful, the front boss will be the one who takes the fall & and rival family will have a hard time assassinating you during a mob war, The disadvantages are, it doesn't lower the chances of having rat in your family & no political backup during a mob war)
- Distribute funds (when a crew is an dire straits you may give them necessary funds to operate, the Capo will automatically owe you a "favor", you can later "cash in" these favors in terms of personal wealth, like cars, planes, boats, rings, or even properties)
- Go legitimate (This option will only be available when you're already the godfathegodmother for more than 15 years and have the enough funds (around 100m), this will dissolve all the illegal business of the family and turn you into a CEO of a legit company)
- Step down (retire as the GodfatheGodmother, to let the younger generation to take over, this option will increase health & happiness for the player character, and erases the notoriety/heat levels completely & you will also receive 250 million dollars, random events will pop up like a Caporegime from your family paying respects to you, a soldier seeks your advice/wisdom, or the underboss visits you to reminisce the good "old days" etc. these events will either increase your happiness or health)
Day job
This option should be included, this will also be a good way to avoid police attention in-game or decrease your "heat", its awkward to see a unemployed schlep making millions of dollars every year and not get caught by the IRS or something lmao,
"Heat" system
For every crime you commit there a corresponding level of heat added to the character's overall "heat", the more serious the crime the more likely the police/feds will target you
Bodyguard system
As I observed in the game, you can easily whack anyone in your family, this should not be, by adding bodyguards, the chances of your success will decrease exponentially
- Associates - 0 bodyguards
- Soldiers/"Made Guys" - 1 to 3 bodyguards
- Caporegimes - 5 to 10 bodyguards
- Underboss - 15 to 20 bodyguards
- GodfatheGodmother - 20 to 40 bodyguards
The only sure-fire way to "whack" a family member is using the "put a contract" tab, the bodyguard system will not be in effect, because as the Godfather, every family member would obey you no question.
Mafia Wars
During a mafia war, business will generate lesser profits (or will even close down), the heat from the police will be much higher & funds will quickly diminish.
There will be only two ways to win a mafia war depending on the justification you chose, these will be:
Eliminate Competition
- Rival family business are wiped out
- Rival family members are all dead or imprisoned
- Rival family business' are in ruins (this is determined on how much of their illegal business were destroyed)
- Rival family members are in disarray (this is determined on how much of their soldiers/"made guys" were killed/imprisoned)
If you win the "take over their business" option, your illegal business will triple their profits, the rival family will be weakened, the police will be more wary of your crime family there's a big chance of rats & stings operations.
If other Crime Families sided with you during the war & you won, you will have to compensate them for 40 million
Ways to lose a mafia war
- You've run out of funds
- Got arrested and convicted during a mafia war
- All of your family members are dead
- You willfully surrender to your rivals
Some Factors in winning a Mafia War
- Capos/Soldiers that have high Intelligence & Willpower have the higher chance of killing/wiping off enemy Soldiers/Members & Businesses
- Your family's number of Soldiers vs the enemies number of Soldiers, if you have a higher troop count, you have a bigger chance of winning the war, if both syndicates have the same amount of soldiers you may have a tougher time in winning the war.
- Number of political allies, having a political ally may also increase your chance in winning the war.
Your family and friends should be wary of you being a mobster, for example, you mother or sister found out that your character is actually a mafia soldier, this will make them disown you, your relationships with them will instantly go to 0 & your happiness will also take a dive.
And the interactions within the mafia family should follow the hierarchy (For example, no associate should be able to directly access the GodfatheGodmother and ask him/her out to go and watch a concert of Lady Gaga lol)
Random Events
Random events should be according to your rank, for example, you're the current Mafia Godfather random events should be in line to your rank, a random guy suddenly insults you on the streets, there should be an option like putting a contract on his/her life or have your soldiers whack him/her or a celebrity starting a "beef" with you, you can either order your men to kill him or just order them beat him up.
Rival Gangs
If you choose to be in the Italian Mafia, your rivals should be the other gangs like Russian Mafia, Yakuza, Triad, Lating Mafia etc and If you're in Sicily, the rival family will be another Sicilian Mafia (i.e You're family is the Visconti Family your rivals will be another Sicilian family)
There should be also family rankings, for example, the Italian Mafia is the current most powerful crime syndicate in the city, followed by the Russian Mafia, followed by the Latin Mafia etc the rankings can change yearly depending on how much muscle (number of soldiers) & income of the families earn, you can also be the most powerful crime family for 10 years if you won a mafia war. If you choose to start a Mafia War the other families can join sides, for example the Italian Mafia waged a war against the Yakuza, the other families will join which side they want, or if you formed an alliance with another mafia family, they will side with you during the war no matter what.
So what do you guys think? You guys can add more of your ideas here.
2024.06.02 06:57 Aggressive-Ranger811 Good or bad physical therapist??
I don't know if this physical therapist is actually helping me or not and I'm kind of sick and tired of having even questioned this but I really need help from a professional. It's like she literally gave me the same stupid stretch exercises and then didn't change it for weeks and then we started doing iontophoresis, and still she didn't give me any new stretching exercises for the tennis elbow or deQuervains tenoyisis for at least 4 weeks and I'm not really sure she knows what she's doing. I don't want to have to request the therapist notes and read over them to see what she's saying because at this point I'm afraid that she's intentionally harming me and it's happened in the past so it's better to be certain. The first time I went to therapy for this specifically it was a different physical therapist and then the next appointment it was her but they didn't tell me it was someone different so I was surprised and kind of angry and she would not leave me alone about it. And was cagey and she wrote that I was uncooperative when I was simply asking who are you. It's so frustrating how much I have to rely on this person despite having like zero trust in them.
submitted by Aggressive-Ranger811 to ehlersdanlos [link] [comments]
2024.06.02 06:54 Mental-Reply6728 How do you handle close friends not showing up for you postpartum?
Let me start by saying we've been extremely blessed with an incredible village-- we had a meal each night for nearly three weeks when we came home from the hospital after a 5 night stay. As a FTM, I can't tell you how helpful it was to not have to worry about dinner during those rough newborn days. I had a friend who I was particularly close to-- I was in her wedding, we've gone on multiple trips together, definitely someone I would consider one of my best friends-- check in after I gave birth, and she asked the big question "What can I do to help you during this time?" I told her about the meal train another friend had set up for me, and that that was the best way anyone who would like to help could help us at this time. She never responded about the meal train, and I later found out that my friend and sister also reached out to her to ask if she'd like to contribute but they, too, received no response (they only asked my close friends and family to help). After that, she checked in here and there, but honestly I was quite hurt by her lack of action so I kept it short and casual. Now, our friendship is close to nonexistent as we no longer communicate and she has never met my baby (or asked to). I should also mention this friend does not want kids and is not big on kids, so that may be why she had no desire to help. How do you handle close friends not showing up for you postpartum? Did you just let the friendship fade, or did you talk to them about how you felt at the time so you can just move on?
submitted by Mental-Reply6728 to Mommit [link] [comments]
2024.06.02 06:52 New-Row-3679 Explaining autism to 6 year old L2 ASM
Hi All. Looking to this community for some advice from folks on the spectrum …..
My daughter is 6 and is level 2 autism. She communicates very well and she is extremely smart. Diagnosed just this year.
She struggles at times with expressive language. Her biggest challenges come from environmental noise which really gets her overstimulated, and emotional regulation. She has a really tough time if things arent exactly going her way.
We have her in OT, speech, equine and music therapy and are doing what we can to support her. (Not looking into ABA if anyone was wondering)
Today she told my wife that she “wishes she was like mom, dad and her big sister”. When my wife asked what she meant, she explained how she just can’t control herself when she gets overwhelmed, overstimulated, etc.
Here’s the big question: She sees differences between herself and the rest of the family. She is very sweet and very sensitive. I think it might be beneficial for her to know what it means to be on the spectrum and that is why she has different reactions to things compared to the others in the family, and that she doesn’t need to feel like she wants to be more like us (her words).
Can you all here provide me some feedback, advice, share experiences, on what you all think would be a good way to go about telling her, or if you have reasons why you think I shouldn’t?
Thanks!!
submitted by New-Row-3679 to autism [link] [comments]
My daughter is 6 and is level 2 autism. She communicates very well and she is extremely smart. Diagnosed just this year.
She struggles at times with expressive language. Her biggest challenges come from environmental noise which really gets her overstimulated, and emotional regulation. She has a really tough time if things arent exactly going her way.
We have her in OT, speech, equine and music therapy and are doing what we can to support her. (Not looking into ABA if anyone was wondering)
Today she told my wife that she “wishes she was like mom, dad and her big sister”. When my wife asked what she meant, she explained how she just can’t control herself when she gets overwhelmed, overstimulated, etc.
Here’s the big question: She sees differences between herself and the rest of the family. She is very sweet and very sensitive. I think it might be beneficial for her to know what it means to be on the spectrum and that is why she has different reactions to things compared to the others in the family, and that she doesn’t need to feel like she wants to be more like us (her words).
Can you all here provide me some feedback, advice, share experiences, on what you all think would be a good way to go about telling her, or if you have reasons why you think I shouldn’t?
Thanks!!
2024.06.02 06:52 grimreeferindacouch I am attending an Orthodox liturgy for the 2nd time tomorrow - when do inquirers learn the formalities?
Hey! I’m sure I’ll be posting a million more questions to come, but before I head to bed I wanted to ask 2 specific questions.
Background: 26 year old who grew up strongly affiliated to the Protestant (evangelical/non-denominational) Church who has been found by Holy Orthodoxy and is highly interested in becoming a catechumen.
Thank you in advance!
submitted by grimreeferindacouch to OrthodoxChristianity [link] [comments]
Background: 26 year old who grew up strongly affiliated to the Protestant (evangelical/non-denominational) Church who has been found by Holy Orthodoxy and is highly interested in becoming a catechumen.
- When/is it appropriate for newcomers/inquirers to prostrate?
- When do inquirers learn the basic formalities? (I.e. prostration, recited prayers, and most importantly - greeting the Fathers)
Thank you in advance!
2024.06.02 06:51 chocolatecauldrons Part II: The Anthology - An Analysis of Each Track
Thank you guys for all your nice comments on my previous post! Here's my followup post walking through the anthology - I apologize for the delay, but I wanted to sit with this half of the album a bit longer. This analysis will be slightly different: first I’ll go through themes present throughout the anthology, and then walk through each song individually, since it’s not as consecutive of a story as the first album. As with my first analysis, I tend to also stay away from literal details as proof that a song is about a certain subject or muse – to me, it’s easier to understand the album when you think first about what the song’s overarching meaning is, rather than getting caught up in literal details (and I think Taylor often throws these in as red herrings). Moreover, it’s important to note that it’s likely that the literal detail she’s thrown in is one that only she and the muse will understand (i.e. her referencing a lilac skirt in imgonnagetyouback is unlikely to be one we’ve ever seen her wearing in public, so it’s useless to paternity test based on that detail!).
Firstly, the word anthology means a collection of assorted literary works. As a result, I think there are more themes scattered through this album, and it’s meant to be a little harder to parse than the first one. I think this album is what TTPD would have been before it crystallized into a tighter theme – similar to the 3 AM tracks for Midnights, the majority of which were written prior to the standard edition’s tracks.
There are a few themes throughout this album. From a romantic context, to me, this album is primarily about Joe. I’ll walk through why I believe that, but this album feels less muddled to me in terms of its muses, and I think that is in part due to the fact that her self-described mania from the standard edition is not a theme on the anthology. This work also covers her own relationship to celebrity and fame, and how that affects her romantic relationships and her personal life in general. And finally, I think the final theme throughout this collection is the idea of childhood, of formative experiences, and how our author goes about processing events that happen to her.
The Black Dog
What happens when you intimately know someone, when you share every aspect of your life with someone, and then it's over? Six weeks after their breakup, she’s barely holding it together (“I move through the world with the heartbroken”). She even tried to rebound her pain away (“I took the miracle move on drug, the effects were temporary”), and wasn’t able to succeed. Meanwhile, she sees him go to a bar, and she has the sudden realization that he may be able to do what she failed to do – he might be able to move on, with someone new. Reckoning with that realization is horrifying. If he is able to pull it off, what does that mean about the love they shared? When he had told her for years that he was who he was for her, and her alone?
You said I needed a bravе man
Then proceeded to play him
Until I believed it too
And it kills me
How could they go from being so intimate that they shower together, that she’s aware of his every move, to being so distant from each other that she wonders if making her fall in love with him was a hazing? And the cruelest part of it is – she doesn’t want either one of them to be able to move on, and give validity to the fact that they weren’t right for each other, even though she knows they have to. Moreover, she’s already *tried* to move on at this point, and failed – she tried to manufacture a counterfeit version of their intimacy, but what if he’s able to perfectly replicate it? And to really drive in the knife, what if it’s with someone younger than her?
And you jump up, but she's too young to know this song
That was intertwined in the magic fabric of our dreaming
Given that a theme throughout the first album was her feeling like she’d given him so much of her youth, so much of her childbearing years, with nothing to show for it, what does it feel like to know that he can essentially reset time, by being with a younger woman, but she’ll never be able to get that time back?
imgonnagetyouback
We know that her and Joe took a break or two while they were together (see: Hits Different, The Great War, in addition to PR articles). To me, this song is about when you do take that break from your partner, and you’re trying to make a point to them that they’re not going to find anyone better than you (I can tell when somebody still wants me, come clean) – the two of you are too intimately intertwined to find a suitable replacement. You know what to wear, what to say, what to do to bring them back to you:
I, I hear thе whispers in your eyes
I'll make you wanna think twice
You'll find that you were never not mine
This song also has a lot of similarities to So Long, London, which is why I attribute it to Joe. To me, it provides a deeper story to some of the lines she touches on in So Long, London:
I didn't opt in to be your odd man out
I founded the club she's heard great things about
And to some of the lines in Hits Different:
I washed my hands of us at the club
You made a mess of me
I pictured you with other girls in love
Then threw up on the street
//
Bet I could still melt your world
Argumentative, antithetical dream girl
imgonnagetyouback is a story of one-upmanship – of trying to out-jealous your partner, of proving to them that nobody knows them better than you do. And maybe this time when they’re both playing this game, it works:
Push the reset button, we're becomin' something new
Say you got somebody, I'll say I got someone too
Even if it's handcuffed, I'm leavin' here with you
//
We broke all the pieces, but still wanna play the game (Oh)
Told my friends I hate you, but I love you just the same
Pick your poison, babe, I'm poison either way
The spacing to me is a deliberate red herring (the 1975 very famously made a song called fallingforyou), and a way to illustrate that the subject of the song wants space from her – but she’s not going to give it to him. This is another theme that calls back to Joe – in So Long, London, she describes him as constantly pulling away (Pulled him in tighter each time he was driftin' away). Matty didn’t pull away – he was all in for two weeks, until he chose to ghost her, and leave abruptly. There was no slow death, no push and pull to her relationship with Matty – it was a meteoric rise and fall.
The Albatross
This song feels like a sister song to “peace” – she describes what it’s like to love her. It’s a little more twisted, however, as she describes her love for her partner as both a danger, and a rescue from the danger she’s imposing on him by being involved with him:
Wise men once said
"Wild winds are death to the candle"
A rose by any other name is a scandal
Cautions issued, he stood
Shooting the messengers
They tried to warn him about her
She’s described herself as wind and liquor in her relationship with Joe previously, in Mastermind:
I'm the wind in our free-flowing sails
And the liquor in our cocktails
She has empathy for the narrator, but disdain for herself. There’s also acceptance though: she knows that she tried to prevent it, and tried to warn him about the danger she posed. In the end though, he chose this life with her, and he chose the danger – there’s only so much she can protect him from.
The devil that you know
Looks now more like an angel
I'm the life you chose
And all this terrible danger
Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus
This song feels like another sister song to The Black Dog – how does she cope with the idea that her long-time partner might move on? How does she cope with the fact that if she chooses to leave, she also chooses the future in which they both move on? A future in which they don’t know each other? It also touches on her wondering if she should move on with Matty, and how feasible it would be to know someone else instead of her partner:
If you want to tear my world apart
Just say you've always wondered
This song, more than anything else, illustrates that moving on with Matty was nothing but a way to move past Joe – what she really wants, more than anything, is a response greater than indifference from Joe:
As the decade would play us for fools
And you saw my bones out with somebody new
Who seemed like he would've bullied you in school
And you just watched it happen
There’s also the realization that Joe may never love who she is now – who she was at the beginning of their relationship will always be who he prefers:
If you want to break my cold, cold heart
Just say, 'I loved you the way that you were'
She’s trying desperately to find some way to make up for the fact that she had to leave Joe, that there was nothing she could do to stay – she tried changing everything about herself, but still, the need to leave him eventually caught up with her:
I changed into goddesses, villains and fools
Changed plans and lovers and outfits and rules
All to outrun my desertion of you
And you just watched it
And she wonders whether despite his indifference, and the distance between them, she should still stay:
Could it be enough to just float in your orbit
Can we watch our phantoms like watching wild horses
Cooler in theory but not if you force it
To be, it just didn't happen
But now, they are merely ghosts of who they once were – it’s not possible to force the relationship anymore.
How Did It End?
When a long-term relationship ends, you can point to the factors that led to its demise: a difference of opinions on money, on marriage, on children, and so forth. It is easy to determine the “what” and the “why” of an ending. But what is harder to diagnose is how you both became the versions of yourselves that weren’t on the same page, that were unable to discuss these topics, that couldn’t move past these dilemmas. That is much, much harder to pinpoint, and this is the question Taylor asks in this song. She knows what killed them:
We hereby conduct this post-mortem
He was a hot house flower to my outdoorsman
//
We were blind to unforeseen circumstances
We learn the right steps to different dances (ohh)
And fell victim to interlopers' glances
Lost the game of chance, what are the chances?
But what she still doesn't know is how it happened – how did it end? She also finds the empathy from the media and from the public to be false and selfish – they only want to know what happened to feverishly spread the news like wildfire.
Come one, come all
It's happenin' again
The empathetic hunger descends
We'll tell no one
Except all of our friends
We must know
How did it end?
//
Soon they'll go home to their husbands
Smug 'cause they know they can trust him
Then feverishly calling their cousins (ohh)
//
Say it once again with feeling
What the feeding frenzy wants more than anything is gossip, and they don’t care that she is utterly lost – lost as to why this happened, and lost physically and mentally:
Guess who we ran into at the shops?
Walking in circles like she was lost
How does she give an answer to quell the empathetic hunger, when she herself doesn’t understand exactly how it happened?
So High School
In an album that touches so much on feeling like she’s running out of time to have the future that she wants, and running out of youth to give the various men who come into her life, it is interesting and heartwarming that the song about Travis on the anthology is one that describes being with him as regaining her youth:
The brink of a wrinkle in time
Bittersweet sixteen suddenly
Moreover, another detail to note in this song is the difference in how she describes alcohol and drugs – in nearly every other song on TTPD, alcohol is a vice she uses in her moments of despair, and drugs are what her previous partners turn to in their moments of strife (she also describes the influence of drugs on her partners as something she detests – “sinking in stoned oblivion” and “you needed me but you needed drugs more”). With Travis, she’s not imbibing in any substances – instead, his thoughts and jokes are enough for her:
I'll drink what you think, and I'm high
From smoking your jokes all damn night
Travis is giving her back her youth, making sober promises, and the impression that we get is that they’re building this dreamlike reality together – it’s wholesome, all-American, and high-school-inspired, yet still grounded in something tangible, unlike the promise of fate and destiny, which powered her relationship with Joe and her entanglement with Matty.
I Hate It Here
More than anything, I think this song illustrates how Taylor sometimes uses escapism and maladaptive daydreaming to ignore the reality of the situation she’s dealing with. She recognizes that it’s not possible to stay where she is, locked inside this prison of stagnation and boredom:
If comfort is a construct
I don't believe in good luck
Now that I know what's what
She recognizes that this isn’t what she used to be, and that she never intended to choose this life of secrecy, perhaps alluding to all those years she spent “locked inside her house”:
You see I was a debutante in another life but
Now I seem to be scared to go outside
She describes herself as finding hope in the places her mind creates (seemingly alluding to her creation of characters and places for folklore and evermore):
I hate it here so I will go to
secret gardens in my mind
People need a key to get to
The only one is mine
I read about it in a book when I was a precocious child
And her escapism into her past, and imaginings of what could have been:
I hate it here so I will go to
Lunar valleys in my mind
When they found a better planet
Only the gentle survived
I dreamed about it in the dark
The night I felt like I might die
All throughout the song, there’s recognition that she doesn’t want to be here – she doesn’t want to feel as if the only place she can be free is in these imaginary worlds she creates. But there’s also concession – is she perhaps only destined for an eternal consolation prize? For loneliness? For imagined romanticism? For the fantasy of how she imagined her life and her love to be?
I'm lonely but I'm good
I'm bitter but I swear I'm fine
I'll save all my romanticism for my inner life and I'll get lost on
purpose
This place made me feel worthless
Lucid dreams like electricity, the current flies through me,
and in my fantasies I rise above it
And way up there, I actually love it
thanK you aIMee
This song, along with a few others in the latter half of the anthology, discusses the loss of innocence she felt in key moments of her life. This one quite obviously alludes to Kim Kardashian, and their infamous feud. I will make a separate post on this, but I think people describing this song as petty may not remember the depth of the hate aimed at Taylor in 2016. Kim and Kanye organized a revenge porn music video for Famous, and held a museum exhibit so that people could take pictures with the naked dolls. The night the snapchat videos were released, every Kardashian family member descended upon social media to gleefully celebrate the #TaylorSwiftIsOverParty. The amount of hate Taylor got was so unprecedented that Instagram actually built their comment filtration system because of this incident. It really was that bad.
And every baby step Taylor took (for example, even just posting that she had a good 2017 was met with immediate media backlash) was quite literally mocked across the internet. People thought the reputation era was cringey, that she was over, and that she deserved everyone’s ire because she was “proven” to be a liar. She describes this in the song:
Each time that Aimee stomped across my grave
And then she wrote headlines in the local paper
Laughing at each baby step I'd take
And it was always the same searing pain
But the whole time, despite the pain and blood, she was dreaming of the day that she would heal, and dreaming of the day that she would climb her way back to to the mountaintop:
And our town, it looks so small from way up here
//
So I pushed each boulder up that hill
Your words were still just ringing in my head, ringing in my head
What still irks her though, is that this bully who created this entire hate train and organized her downfall will pretend as if it never happened – she will undoubtedly reframe things to make our subject seem overdramatic, petty, and unable to move past the incidents of years ago. Taylor, however, has always been clear about one thing: sometimes, no amount of time can heal you from something that deeply traumatized you.
I Look in People’s Windows
This song to me feels like a sister song to The Black Dog, but a few months after the official end of a relationship. A sub theme that runs through Taylor’s songs about the Joe breakup is the loss of being understood – when you are no longer with a long-term partner, how do you cope with the fact that you move the world knowing everything about this person, but at the same time, not knowing them anymore? Would you peek into their windows just to get a glimpse of what their life looks like now? As anyone who has gone through a breakup knows, the hardest part is often not being privy to the mundane details of that person’s world – their dinner parties, their wine, their friends, and so on.
I look in people's windows
Transfixed by rose golden glows
They have their friends over to drink nice wine
I look in people's windows
In case you're at their table
What if your eyes looked up and met mine
One more time
The Prophecy
The prophecy is devastating. More so than any other song Taylor has ever written, it is full of desperation and longing. All she asks for is to be known, to be understood – to not be perceived as an idea of a woman, or a starlet with no humanity:
Please
I've been on my knees
Change the prophecy
Don't want money
Just someone who wants my company
Let it once be me
Who do I have to speak to
About if they can redo
The prophecy?
It’s striking especially considering how much she laments that leaving Joe means she’s giving up being known – it’s also striking given the fact that in the epilogue poem, she states that neither Joe or Matty ever truly knew her:
He never even scratched the surface
of me.
None of them did.
What she desires beyond fame, beyond notoriety, beyond money, is to be loved and to be known. The song also alludes to her being in therapy, and to finding some sort of consolation that she will find someone to share her life with:
I'm so afraid I sealed my fate
No sign of soulmates
I'm just a paperweight
In shades of greige
Spending my last coin so someone will tell me
It'll be ok
Cassandra
This track is a sister song to thanK you aIMee, and continues exploring the theme of fraught public womanhood we see in Clara Bow and Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me. In this song, Taylor discusses how the validation of women is never publicized in the way that the crucifixion of them is:
When the first stone's thrown, there's screaming
In the streets, there's a raging riot
When it's "Burn the bitch, " they're shrieking
When the truth comes out, it's quiet
Moreover, when women speak up about an issue, they’re often viewed as overdramatic, and unserious. Cassandra, in Greek mythology, was cursed by Apollo to always predict the future accurately, but never be believed. We see this happen every day to women in politics, in the media, and in pop culture:
So, they killed Cassandra first 'cause she feared the worst
And tried to tell the town
So, they set my life in flames, I regret to say
Do you believe me now?
And for Taylor, it’s reminiscent of all the times she’s been the first to speak out about something in the industry – for example, against Scooter Braun and his well-established pattern of bullying, or of the exploitation of artists on streaming services – but never been supported broadly by her peers. They believe her later, but at that point, very few people give her the credit for speaking up in the first place. It’s reminiscent of the Kimye scandal. When the news broke originally, the hatred she received was widespread. But when she was acquitted by the long-form video that leaked, it didn’t receive anywhere near the level of coverage that the original scandal received.
Peter
Peter is another song that touches on both the male muses for this album, and in turn, on the promises various men have given her over her life (we’ll circle back to this in The Manuscript!). It also touches on the theme of waiting that’s seen throughout this album, especially on her songs about Joe – how much time is enough time to give?
Both Matty and Joe were 25 when they met her, and it’s abundantly clear that both men made promises to her: promises of marriage, of children, and of a future. But how long can she wait for these promises to be fulfilled? To Joe, she gives six years of her life and youth, and to Matty, she gives him a chance to prove that he was reformed from the time she knew him last: both men eventually fail. Neither man is ready to give up their childish whims, and she has no choice but to lose hope that either of them ever will.
And you said you'd come and get me but you were 25
And the shelf life of those fantasies has expired
Lost to the lost boys chapter of your life
Forgive me Peter, please know that I tried
To hold onto the days when you were mine
But the woman who sits by the window has turned out the light
Another thing to note is the interesting double meaning of the song title. To peter also means to diminish gradually – much like her faith in both men’s promises.
The Bolter
A lot of the songs Taylor has written about Joe in this album deal with the question of “when is the right time to leave?” When you know that things are stagnant, and you know that you’ve given everything you have to a relationship, you know that you have to leave – but it’s easy to convince yourself if you have a history of “leaving before you get left” that you should ride out this wave, and that this pain might just be temporary.
The Bolter, to me, reflects on Taylor’s history – it seems like she prided herself on being able to see the warning signs, and being able to get out in time.
She's been many places with
Men of many faces
First, they're off to the races
And she's laughing drawin' aces
But, none of it is changin'
That the chariot is waitin'
Hearts are hers for the breakin'
There's an escape in escaping
It’s relevant to TTPD, because likely, she saw not bolting as a sign of growth and maturity. You know that you’ve grown as a person when you don’t abandon ship at the first sign of trouble, but what if there are so many signs of trouble that the truly mature thing to do would be to leave?
Robin
Robin leads into this theme of childhood and innocence that we see further in The Manuscript. The track name is also the name of Aaron Dessner’s child. She ponders how beautiful and sweet it is that we work so hard to protect childhood naivete:
Strings tied to levers,
slowed down clocks tethered,
all this showmanship
To keep it, for you,
In sweetness
And there’s an element of wistfulness to it – don’t we sometimes wish that we could also be protected from the worst the world has to offer?
You have no room in your dreams for regrets
You have no idea
The time will arrive for the cruel and the mean
You'll learn to bounce back just like your trampoline
But now we'll curtail your curiosity
The Manuscript
This song is perhaps the most climactic song on the album. It covers her romantic history up until that point, and starts at the moment she feels everything went awry – and it predates Joe and Matty. Instead, it calls back to the first time she experienced a proper heartbreak, and the first time she lost her childlike innocence in the world – her relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal (a time she described as her transition from childhood to womanhood). She describes how they compared licenses, and how he told her that if they had sex, and it was as good as the conversation was, then they would get married, and have a family. He was the first man to make her these promises:
He said that if the sex was half as good as the conversation was
Soon they'd be pushin' strollers
But soon it was over
He tells her that it’s ok that they have an age gap, because she’s so advanced for her age:
She thought about how he said since she was so wise beyond her years
Everything had been above board
She wasn't sure
While dating him, she desperately wants to be older, and starts emulating his behavior:
In the age of him, she wished she was thirty
And made coffee every morning in a French press
And when it’s over, she regresses, and turns back into a child – unable to sleep alone without the comfort of her mother, and unable to eat anything substantial besides the sugary cereal of her youth:
Afterwards she only ate kids' cereal
And couldn't sleep unless it was in her mother's bed
She forces herself to date boys her own age, to not rely on the maturity of an older man to guide her through adulthood, but she can’t help but feel disappointed in their youth:
Then she dated boys who were her own age
With dart boards on the backs of their doors
Finally, as she creates the All Too Well short film, she recognizes the damage he did to her, and how the consequences of that affair have shaped her life since:
And the years passed
Like scenes of a show
The Professor said to write what you know
Lookin' backwards
Might be the only way to move forward
Then the actors
Were hitting their marks
And the slow dance
Was alight with the sparks
And the tears fell
In synchronicity with the score
And at last
She knew what the agony had been for
Everything calls back to this first man, and these original promises – everything she’s been chasing since is reminiscent of this first scar. And just like how releasing All Too Well transformed and healed her, she hopes that by releasing this additional manuscript into the world, it will heal her again. As she describes in the epilogue poem, she is entering all her thoughts, emotions, and pain into evidence – she now asks the audience to process it with her, and thus conclude this process of healing.
The only thing that's left is the manuscript
One last souvenir from my trip to your shores
Now and then I reread the manuscript
But the story isn't mine anymore
If you read all of this - thank you! I enjoyed writing it, and I'm excited to discuss with you all in the replies :)
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Firstly, the word anthology means a collection of assorted literary works. As a result, I think there are more themes scattered through this album, and it’s meant to be a little harder to parse than the first one. I think this album is what TTPD would have been before it crystallized into a tighter theme – similar to the 3 AM tracks for Midnights, the majority of which were written prior to the standard edition’s tracks.
There are a few themes throughout this album. From a romantic context, to me, this album is primarily about Joe. I’ll walk through why I believe that, but this album feels less muddled to me in terms of its muses, and I think that is in part due to the fact that her self-described mania from the standard edition is not a theme on the anthology. This work also covers her own relationship to celebrity and fame, and how that affects her romantic relationships and her personal life in general. And finally, I think the final theme throughout this collection is the idea of childhood, of formative experiences, and how our author goes about processing events that happen to her.
The Black Dog
What happens when you intimately know someone, when you share every aspect of your life with someone, and then it's over? Six weeks after their breakup, she’s barely holding it together (“I move through the world with the heartbroken”). She even tried to rebound her pain away (“I took the miracle move on drug, the effects were temporary”), and wasn’t able to succeed. Meanwhile, she sees him go to a bar, and she has the sudden realization that he may be able to do what she failed to do – he might be able to move on, with someone new. Reckoning with that realization is horrifying. If he is able to pull it off, what does that mean about the love they shared? When he had told her for years that he was who he was for her, and her alone?
You said I needed a bravе man
Then proceeded to play him
Until I believed it too
And it kills me
How could they go from being so intimate that they shower together, that she’s aware of his every move, to being so distant from each other that she wonders if making her fall in love with him was a hazing? And the cruelest part of it is – she doesn’t want either one of them to be able to move on, and give validity to the fact that they weren’t right for each other, even though she knows they have to. Moreover, she’s already *tried* to move on at this point, and failed – she tried to manufacture a counterfeit version of their intimacy, but what if he’s able to perfectly replicate it? And to really drive in the knife, what if it’s with someone younger than her?
And you jump up, but she's too young to know this song
That was intertwined in the magic fabric of our dreaming
Given that a theme throughout the first album was her feeling like she’d given him so much of her youth, so much of her childbearing years, with nothing to show for it, what does it feel like to know that he can essentially reset time, by being with a younger woman, but she’ll never be able to get that time back?
imgonnagetyouback
We know that her and Joe took a break or two while they were together (see: Hits Different, The Great War, in addition to PR articles). To me, this song is about when you do take that break from your partner, and you’re trying to make a point to them that they’re not going to find anyone better than you (I can tell when somebody still wants me, come clean) – the two of you are too intimately intertwined to find a suitable replacement. You know what to wear, what to say, what to do to bring them back to you:
I, I hear thе whispers in your eyes
I'll make you wanna think twice
You'll find that you were never not mine
This song also has a lot of similarities to So Long, London, which is why I attribute it to Joe. To me, it provides a deeper story to some of the lines she touches on in So Long, London:
I didn't opt in to be your odd man out
I founded the club she's heard great things about
And to some of the lines in Hits Different:
I washed my hands of us at the club
You made a mess of me
I pictured you with other girls in love
Then threw up on the street
//
Bet I could still melt your world
Argumentative, antithetical dream girl
imgonnagetyouback is a story of one-upmanship – of trying to out-jealous your partner, of proving to them that nobody knows them better than you do. And maybe this time when they’re both playing this game, it works:
Push the reset button, we're becomin' something new
Say you got somebody, I'll say I got someone too
Even if it's handcuffed, I'm leavin' here with you
//
We broke all the pieces, but still wanna play the game (Oh)
Told my friends I hate you, but I love you just the same
Pick your poison, babe, I'm poison either way
The spacing to me is a deliberate red herring (the 1975 very famously made a song called fallingforyou), and a way to illustrate that the subject of the song wants space from her – but she’s not going to give it to him. This is another theme that calls back to Joe – in So Long, London, she describes him as constantly pulling away (Pulled him in tighter each time he was driftin' away). Matty didn’t pull away – he was all in for two weeks, until he chose to ghost her, and leave abruptly. There was no slow death, no push and pull to her relationship with Matty – it was a meteoric rise and fall.
The Albatross
This song feels like a sister song to “peace” – she describes what it’s like to love her. It’s a little more twisted, however, as she describes her love for her partner as both a danger, and a rescue from the danger she’s imposing on him by being involved with him:
Wise men once said
"Wild winds are death to the candle"
A rose by any other name is a scandal
Cautions issued, he stood
Shooting the messengers
They tried to warn him about her
She’s described herself as wind and liquor in her relationship with Joe previously, in Mastermind:
I'm the wind in our free-flowing sails
And the liquor in our cocktails
She has empathy for the narrator, but disdain for herself. There’s also acceptance though: she knows that she tried to prevent it, and tried to warn him about the danger she posed. In the end though, he chose this life with her, and he chose the danger – there’s only so much she can protect him from.
The devil that you know
Looks now more like an angel
I'm the life you chose
And all this terrible danger
Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus
This song feels like another sister song to The Black Dog – how does she cope with the idea that her long-time partner might move on? How does she cope with the fact that if she chooses to leave, she also chooses the future in which they both move on? A future in which they don’t know each other? It also touches on her wondering if she should move on with Matty, and how feasible it would be to know someone else instead of her partner:
If you want to tear my world apart
Just say you've always wondered
This song, more than anything else, illustrates that moving on with Matty was nothing but a way to move past Joe – what she really wants, more than anything, is a response greater than indifference from Joe:
As the decade would play us for fools
And you saw my bones out with somebody new
Who seemed like he would've bullied you in school
And you just watched it happen
There’s also the realization that Joe may never love who she is now – who she was at the beginning of their relationship will always be who he prefers:
If you want to break my cold, cold heart
Just say, 'I loved you the way that you were'
She’s trying desperately to find some way to make up for the fact that she had to leave Joe, that there was nothing she could do to stay – she tried changing everything about herself, but still, the need to leave him eventually caught up with her:
I changed into goddesses, villains and fools
Changed plans and lovers and outfits and rules
All to outrun my desertion of you
And you just watched it
And she wonders whether despite his indifference, and the distance between them, she should still stay:
Could it be enough to just float in your orbit
Can we watch our phantoms like watching wild horses
Cooler in theory but not if you force it
To be, it just didn't happen
But now, they are merely ghosts of who they once were – it’s not possible to force the relationship anymore.
How Did It End?
When a long-term relationship ends, you can point to the factors that led to its demise: a difference of opinions on money, on marriage, on children, and so forth. It is easy to determine the “what” and the “why” of an ending. But what is harder to diagnose is how you both became the versions of yourselves that weren’t on the same page, that were unable to discuss these topics, that couldn’t move past these dilemmas. That is much, much harder to pinpoint, and this is the question Taylor asks in this song. She knows what killed them:
We hereby conduct this post-mortem
He was a hot house flower to my outdoorsman
//
We were blind to unforeseen circumstances
We learn the right steps to different dances (ohh)
And fell victim to interlopers' glances
Lost the game of chance, what are the chances?
But what she still doesn't know is how it happened – how did it end? She also finds the empathy from the media and from the public to be false and selfish – they only want to know what happened to feverishly spread the news like wildfire.
Come one, come all
It's happenin' again
The empathetic hunger descends
We'll tell no one
Except all of our friends
We must know
How did it end?
//
Soon they'll go home to their husbands
Smug 'cause they know they can trust him
Then feverishly calling their cousins (ohh)
//
Say it once again with feeling
What the feeding frenzy wants more than anything is gossip, and they don’t care that she is utterly lost – lost as to why this happened, and lost physically and mentally:
Guess who we ran into at the shops?
Walking in circles like she was lost
How does she give an answer to quell the empathetic hunger, when she herself doesn’t understand exactly how it happened?
So High School
In an album that touches so much on feeling like she’s running out of time to have the future that she wants, and running out of youth to give the various men who come into her life, it is interesting and heartwarming that the song about Travis on the anthology is one that describes being with him as regaining her youth:
The brink of a wrinkle in time
Bittersweet sixteen suddenly
Moreover, another detail to note in this song is the difference in how she describes alcohol and drugs – in nearly every other song on TTPD, alcohol is a vice she uses in her moments of despair, and drugs are what her previous partners turn to in their moments of strife (she also describes the influence of drugs on her partners as something she detests – “sinking in stoned oblivion” and “you needed me but you needed drugs more”). With Travis, she’s not imbibing in any substances – instead, his thoughts and jokes are enough for her:
I'll drink what you think, and I'm high
From smoking your jokes all damn night
Travis is giving her back her youth, making sober promises, and the impression that we get is that they’re building this dreamlike reality together – it’s wholesome, all-American, and high-school-inspired, yet still grounded in something tangible, unlike the promise of fate and destiny, which powered her relationship with Joe and her entanglement with Matty.
I Hate It Here
More than anything, I think this song illustrates how Taylor sometimes uses escapism and maladaptive daydreaming to ignore the reality of the situation she’s dealing with. She recognizes that it’s not possible to stay where she is, locked inside this prison of stagnation and boredom:
If comfort is a construct
I don't believe in good luck
Now that I know what's what
She recognizes that this isn’t what she used to be, and that she never intended to choose this life of secrecy, perhaps alluding to all those years she spent “locked inside her house”:
You see I was a debutante in another life but
Now I seem to be scared to go outside
She describes herself as finding hope in the places her mind creates (seemingly alluding to her creation of characters and places for folklore and evermore):
I hate it here so I will go to
secret gardens in my mind
People need a key to get to
The only one is mine
I read about it in a book when I was a precocious child
And her escapism into her past, and imaginings of what could have been:
I hate it here so I will go to
Lunar valleys in my mind
When they found a better planet
Only the gentle survived
I dreamed about it in the dark
The night I felt like I might die
All throughout the song, there’s recognition that she doesn’t want to be here – she doesn’t want to feel as if the only place she can be free is in these imaginary worlds she creates. But there’s also concession – is she perhaps only destined for an eternal consolation prize? For loneliness? For imagined romanticism? For the fantasy of how she imagined her life and her love to be?
I'm lonely but I'm good
I'm bitter but I swear I'm fine
I'll save all my romanticism for my inner life and I'll get lost on
purpose
This place made me feel worthless
Lucid dreams like electricity, the current flies through me,
and in my fantasies I rise above it
And way up there, I actually love it
thanK you aIMee
This song, along with a few others in the latter half of the anthology, discusses the loss of innocence she felt in key moments of her life. This one quite obviously alludes to Kim Kardashian, and their infamous feud. I will make a separate post on this, but I think people describing this song as petty may not remember the depth of the hate aimed at Taylor in 2016. Kim and Kanye organized a revenge porn music video for Famous, and held a museum exhibit so that people could take pictures with the naked dolls. The night the snapchat videos were released, every Kardashian family member descended upon social media to gleefully celebrate the #TaylorSwiftIsOverParty. The amount of hate Taylor got was so unprecedented that Instagram actually built their comment filtration system because of this incident. It really was that bad.
And every baby step Taylor took (for example, even just posting that she had a good 2017 was met with immediate media backlash) was quite literally mocked across the internet. People thought the reputation era was cringey, that she was over, and that she deserved everyone’s ire because she was “proven” to be a liar. She describes this in the song:
Each time that Aimee stomped across my grave
And then she wrote headlines in the local paper
Laughing at each baby step I'd take
And it was always the same searing pain
But the whole time, despite the pain and blood, she was dreaming of the day that she would heal, and dreaming of the day that she would climb her way back to to the mountaintop:
And our town, it looks so small from way up here
//
So I pushed each boulder up that hill
Your words were still just ringing in my head, ringing in my head
What still irks her though, is that this bully who created this entire hate train and organized her downfall will pretend as if it never happened – she will undoubtedly reframe things to make our subject seem overdramatic, petty, and unable to move past the incidents of years ago. Taylor, however, has always been clear about one thing: sometimes, no amount of time can heal you from something that deeply traumatized you.
I Look in People’s Windows
This song to me feels like a sister song to The Black Dog, but a few months after the official end of a relationship. A sub theme that runs through Taylor’s songs about the Joe breakup is the loss of being understood – when you are no longer with a long-term partner, how do you cope with the fact that you move the world knowing everything about this person, but at the same time, not knowing them anymore? Would you peek into their windows just to get a glimpse of what their life looks like now? As anyone who has gone through a breakup knows, the hardest part is often not being privy to the mundane details of that person’s world – their dinner parties, their wine, their friends, and so on.
I look in people's windows
Transfixed by rose golden glows
They have their friends over to drink nice wine
I look in people's windows
In case you're at their table
What if your eyes looked up and met mine
One more time
The Prophecy
The prophecy is devastating. More so than any other song Taylor has ever written, it is full of desperation and longing. All she asks for is to be known, to be understood – to not be perceived as an idea of a woman, or a starlet with no humanity:
Please
I've been on my knees
Change the prophecy
Don't want money
Just someone who wants my company
Let it once be me
Who do I have to speak to
About if they can redo
The prophecy?
It’s striking especially considering how much she laments that leaving Joe means she’s giving up being known – it’s also striking given the fact that in the epilogue poem, she states that neither Joe or Matty ever truly knew her:
He never even scratched the surface
of me.
None of them did.
What she desires beyond fame, beyond notoriety, beyond money, is to be loved and to be known. The song also alludes to her being in therapy, and to finding some sort of consolation that she will find someone to share her life with:
I'm so afraid I sealed my fate
No sign of soulmates
I'm just a paperweight
In shades of greige
Spending my last coin so someone will tell me
It'll be ok
Cassandra
This track is a sister song to thanK you aIMee, and continues exploring the theme of fraught public womanhood we see in Clara Bow and Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me. In this song, Taylor discusses how the validation of women is never publicized in the way that the crucifixion of them is:
When the first stone's thrown, there's screaming
In the streets, there's a raging riot
When it's "Burn the bitch, " they're shrieking
When the truth comes out, it's quiet
Moreover, when women speak up about an issue, they’re often viewed as overdramatic, and unserious. Cassandra, in Greek mythology, was cursed by Apollo to always predict the future accurately, but never be believed. We see this happen every day to women in politics, in the media, and in pop culture:
So, they killed Cassandra first 'cause she feared the worst
And tried to tell the town
So, they set my life in flames, I regret to say
Do you believe me now?
And for Taylor, it’s reminiscent of all the times she’s been the first to speak out about something in the industry – for example, against Scooter Braun and his well-established pattern of bullying, or of the exploitation of artists on streaming services – but never been supported broadly by her peers. They believe her later, but at that point, very few people give her the credit for speaking up in the first place. It’s reminiscent of the Kimye scandal. When the news broke originally, the hatred she received was widespread. But when she was acquitted by the long-form video that leaked, it didn’t receive anywhere near the level of coverage that the original scandal received.
Peter
Peter is another song that touches on both the male muses for this album, and in turn, on the promises various men have given her over her life (we’ll circle back to this in The Manuscript!). It also touches on the theme of waiting that’s seen throughout this album, especially on her songs about Joe – how much time is enough time to give?
Both Matty and Joe were 25 when they met her, and it’s abundantly clear that both men made promises to her: promises of marriage, of children, and of a future. But how long can she wait for these promises to be fulfilled? To Joe, she gives six years of her life and youth, and to Matty, she gives him a chance to prove that he was reformed from the time she knew him last: both men eventually fail. Neither man is ready to give up their childish whims, and she has no choice but to lose hope that either of them ever will.
And you said you'd come and get me but you were 25
And the shelf life of those fantasies has expired
Lost to the lost boys chapter of your life
Forgive me Peter, please know that I tried
To hold onto the days when you were mine
But the woman who sits by the window has turned out the light
Another thing to note is the interesting double meaning of the song title. To peter also means to diminish gradually – much like her faith in both men’s promises.
The Bolter
A lot of the songs Taylor has written about Joe in this album deal with the question of “when is the right time to leave?” When you know that things are stagnant, and you know that you’ve given everything you have to a relationship, you know that you have to leave – but it’s easy to convince yourself if you have a history of “leaving before you get left” that you should ride out this wave, and that this pain might just be temporary.
The Bolter, to me, reflects on Taylor’s history – it seems like she prided herself on being able to see the warning signs, and being able to get out in time.
She's been many places with
Men of many faces
First, they're off to the races
And she's laughing drawin' aces
But, none of it is changin'
That the chariot is waitin'
Hearts are hers for the breakin'
There's an escape in escaping
It’s relevant to TTPD, because likely, she saw not bolting as a sign of growth and maturity. You know that you’ve grown as a person when you don’t abandon ship at the first sign of trouble, but what if there are so many signs of trouble that the truly mature thing to do would be to leave?
Robin
Robin leads into this theme of childhood and innocence that we see further in The Manuscript. The track name is also the name of Aaron Dessner’s child. She ponders how beautiful and sweet it is that we work so hard to protect childhood naivete:
Strings tied to levers,
slowed down clocks tethered,
all this showmanship
To keep it, for you,
In sweetness
And there’s an element of wistfulness to it – don’t we sometimes wish that we could also be protected from the worst the world has to offer?
You have no room in your dreams for regrets
You have no idea
The time will arrive for the cruel and the mean
You'll learn to bounce back just like your trampoline
But now we'll curtail your curiosity
The Manuscript
This song is perhaps the most climactic song on the album. It covers her romantic history up until that point, and starts at the moment she feels everything went awry – and it predates Joe and Matty. Instead, it calls back to the first time she experienced a proper heartbreak, and the first time she lost her childlike innocence in the world – her relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal (a time she described as her transition from childhood to womanhood). She describes how they compared licenses, and how he told her that if they had sex, and it was as good as the conversation was, then they would get married, and have a family. He was the first man to make her these promises:
He said that if the sex was half as good as the conversation was
Soon they'd be pushin' strollers
But soon it was over
He tells her that it’s ok that they have an age gap, because she’s so advanced for her age:
She thought about how he said since she was so wise beyond her years
Everything had been above board
She wasn't sure
While dating him, she desperately wants to be older, and starts emulating his behavior:
In the age of him, she wished she was thirty
And made coffee every morning in a French press
And when it’s over, she regresses, and turns back into a child – unable to sleep alone without the comfort of her mother, and unable to eat anything substantial besides the sugary cereal of her youth:
Afterwards she only ate kids' cereal
And couldn't sleep unless it was in her mother's bed
She forces herself to date boys her own age, to not rely on the maturity of an older man to guide her through adulthood, but she can’t help but feel disappointed in their youth:
Then she dated boys who were her own age
With dart boards on the backs of their doors
Finally, as she creates the All Too Well short film, she recognizes the damage he did to her, and how the consequences of that affair have shaped her life since:
And the years passed
Like scenes of a show
The Professor said to write what you know
Lookin' backwards
Might be the only way to move forward
Then the actors
Were hitting their marks
And the slow dance
Was alight with the sparks
And the tears fell
In synchronicity with the score
And at last
She knew what the agony had been for
Everything calls back to this first man, and these original promises – everything she’s been chasing since is reminiscent of this first scar. And just like how releasing All Too Well transformed and healed her, she hopes that by releasing this additional manuscript into the world, it will heal her again. As she describes in the epilogue poem, she is entering all her thoughts, emotions, and pain into evidence – she now asks the audience to process it with her, and thus conclude this process of healing.
The only thing that's left is the manuscript
One last souvenir from my trip to your shores
Now and then I reread the manuscript
But the story isn't mine anymore
If you read all of this - thank you! I enjoyed writing it, and I'm excited to discuss with you all in the replies :)
2024.06.02 06:51 futurebannedacct Choices
 | Hello, everyone. I'm out of my hibernation with another important message for you all and I know that just makes you so fucking happy and excited. submitted by futurebannedacct to CoronavirusCirclejerk [link] [comments] I wanted to remind everyone to check out my blog, which is one of the last bastions of free speech that is left in this god-forsaken place. Alright, now that I have officially tongued my own asshole to the point where pleasure turns to dysphoria, allow me to present to you: total bullshit! ... and some other things. Let's talk about choices. We make them everyday; life is all about them. This is a somewhat true statement - because life is really all about making sure you don't wake up - and choices play a significant role in this operation. Probably not so big a role as language, however, because language is the most deceptive tool in the arsenal of the ones with the power, so it is important that we choose our words wisely. For example, I keep hearing the phrase "forced vaccinations" or "mandatory vaccinations" being thrown around conspiracy forums, and this phrase, in itself, is an example of the deceptive power of words. We need to be honest with ourselves - because through honesty the truth is exposed - and the truth is the most well hidden part of this experience because the ones in power work to keep the truth hidden at all costs... because the truth will "set you free". But I digress. No one was forced to get vaccinated - not yet, anyway - so let's be honest about this: you might have chosen to take the jab, in order to keep your job, or you might have chosen to take the jab, in order to participate in society. This is a choice that you are making. Perhaps the stakes are high and you had a lot to lose if you chose not to take the jab; but until they are breaking down your door, holding you down, and sticking that needle in your arm - until that time - you are giving your consent to take the jab. This distinction is an important one to discern because we should be paying attention to the parts in life that are forced upon us and the parts in life that we are choosing to consent to. For example, no one forced us to wear masks for an entire year, but we all (for the most part) consented to doing so, in order to participate in society. We all chose to stand on the circles on the floor, in every checkout line, of every store. We made this choice for many different reasons - but in this community - many of us simply did this for other peoples "perceived well being". In other words, we were catering to the people that make up the majority and aren't as far along in the process of "waking up" as we are... although, many people seem to be choosing to remain asleep - for many different reasons - far from the most insignificant being "fear based programming". Allow me to share my perspective: for an entire year, we all wore masks in public: an action which is gradually weakening our immune system. Also in public, we practiced "social-distancing": an action that is also gradually weakening our immune systems. Many people - the drooling masses - took this social-distancing b.s. very seriously, for their own "perceived well being" (while virtue-signaling online that they were doing it for everyone else). So, the government asked us to all make a choice: to wear masks and social-distance for a year and - oh - almost forgot! Hand sanitizer - all over, suddenly - some so strong that it seems to be pure rubbing alcohol - killing all germs - and, well... gradually weakening our immune systems! The government had us all compromising our immune systems and overall health, in preparation to get vaccinated with something that sounds... frankly, batshit insane. Do you think this was all an accident? An innocent faux-pas on the part of our dear leaders? I think this was done intentionally. I've also prepared this meme, to help illustrate the conspiracy in question: The inspiration for this actually came from a post in that was written by someone who is, by no means, an anti-vaxxer, and overall still happy to be vaccinated... because the debilitating side-effects, self-replicating spike proteins is nothing compared to the constant onslaught of fear-based programming. "Trust the science". That's the last thing I think I'll do; thank you very much. Science is a bullshit factory specializing in limiting beliefs, which uses language to support any point of view that it chooses to support... and of course the point of view we are inundated with, in excess, is that of the ones in power. So please know that if you choose to educate me in the comments, about why the science behind social distancing, face masks and hand sanitizer is to our benefit then I'm either going to think you are being intentionally deceitful, or I will feel sorry for you because you have sincerely become this invested in the wrong direction of practices that are to your benefit. The moral of the story is that the words we use need to be chosen carefully, because when we choose words such as "forced" and "mandated", we are only working to deceive ourselves further away from the truth. The truth is that we are consistently bombarded with propaganda and manipulation, from the many resources available to the power structure, with the goal of getting our consent. The internet has been a great resource for the power structure to use for minimizing the power of consent. We must constantly "agree" to the terms and conditions that are made to be intentionally agonizing to read and understand. We are being trained to believe that consent is of little value or importance - consent is nothing more than a single click - in order to get to the prize on the other side. The truth may be that our consent is far more valuable than we realize: our consent is one of our most valuable assets. We need to pay attention to the effect that our consent has on our shared reality - because if there is one thing I learned, after experiencing psychosis - it's that the greatest sin is often committed by very kind people: the kind of people who are timid, helpful, and generous to a point where others take advantage of their kind, benevolent nature. Everyone knows someone who is in a relationship with a manipulative, controlling narcissist that walks all over them. Everyone knows someone who is kind, meek, and respectful of others... because they have no backbone. Someone who has lived a life of avoiding any and all conflict, at all costs, and chooses instead to allow others to take advantage of them. When you habitually allow others to walk all over you, this is your consent that "it's ok for others to do this to me". You are a worse person that the one who is violating you, because you think that it is ok for this to happen to you. Alright - that was just to set the mood for the actual post - which will begin..... ........ ......... now. CHOICES: PATRIOTIC EDITION In the spirit of (shudder) "the most free country on Earth" we're going to (I had a bad reaction to typing that just now, I find the idea to be suffocating and repulsive) talk about choices in red, white and blue. To be perfectly honest, I don't know that much about topics like "color programming", or the exact science and reasoning behind it; I just know that this color palette is used with enough frequency and in a way where there is likely some intent behind it. Perhaps it's as simple as feeling patriotic about democracy, constitutional rights, and other deceptive concepts that are total bullshit - or maybe - the meaning behind it goes far deeper, into the psychological manipulation that is induced by this particular color palette. When I saw that the magnet shared the same red/blue color palette, I realized that these colors are likely being used in order to put each individual into a state of polarization. CHOICE # 1 Games are fun. Games are based in conflict. Manufacturing reality by making conflict the biggest source for entertainment. Being alive involves the near constant activity of making choices. We are indoctrinated with the idea that having more choices is desirable. The power construct that is manufacturing reality has recently gone into overdrive in the manufacturing of choices. As the information age progresses through time, the amount of choices is becoming an ever increasing burden on the collective consciousness. The choices are presented using many different angles. A popular example is beliefs, which are currently being exploited by the manufacturers of choices more than any other time in the collective memory... which is always followed closely by the collective amnesia. Choices are deeply rooted in the DIVIDE AND CONQUER strategy, an all time favorite of the power construct. Choices are now being utilized in another favorite strategy for maintaining control: ORDER OUT OF CHAOS. Choices have an important role in the MANUFACTURING OF CONSENT, which is highly valued by the power construct. Consent is the oil that keeps the reality machine running smoothly, which is why so much effort is put into the illusion that consent has very little value. This illusion is concealed very well within the fabric of the intangible idea of reality that is overlaying the physical, material reality and has been so successful that consent is given almost instantaneously and without a second thought. Meanwhile, the illusion of value that has been given to currency is as strong as ever: remaining in its long-held position as one of the "pillars of control", which supports and maintains the power construct. The other pillar of control: the illusion of legitimacy, which several institutions within the power construct rely on, has been under maintenance, as a new version is being installed. While the anticipation for this new update slowly builds, the grand master illusion behind the power construct: FEAR BASED PROGRAMMING, - that's it - I'm giving up on this now. They're fucking plastic robots that hit each other until one of their heads... pops a boner? CHOICE # 2 A theme that seems to always accompany color-based choices emerges: everyone on the outside, looking in, sees an absolutely pointless rivalry. These dudes are victims of mind control. Well, after choice # 1 resulted in a train wreck of disjointed abstractions trying way too hard to be deep, meaningful observations, I am troubled by the thought of how many readers have probably given up on this. I want everyone that is still with me to know that, due to irrational fears about what anonymous online profiles might think about me, I will now focus primarily on "fitting in" and being likeable, by employing a strategy of trying very hard to not express any more ideas that might be considered "out there". Obviously, this is just the result of growing up poor and uneducated in the ghetto. I mean, who is crazy enough to actually believe that this is somehow connected to other rivalry's that use... very similar hues of red and blue. I mean, they are two of the most popular colors out there - both primary - and... realistically, there aren't that many colors; especially that complement each other like red and blue... ahh, blue and red: the colors of rivalry. There's no deep conspiracy here. Obviously, these guys wear these colors so they know who their enemies are... because, otherwise, there is no reason to kill each other. This is all about the colors. It would be completely pointless otherwise and these guys would probably get on well and hang out in each other's back yards... and then the cops would have nothing to do, which would be a waste of tax payer dollars. Can't have cops just standing around eatin' donuts and getting fat. CHOICE # 3 Coke & Pepsi. A classic rivalry that makes me proud to live in a free country, where great ideas like capitalism can flourish. I know that they are made by the same company, but I don't really think that matters, ya know? We are presented with choices. Our choices shape our opinions. So, if I choose red - I mean - Coke, then I will get along with others who choose Coke and we will agree that we chose correctly and that the people that prefer blue - I mean - Pepsi, chose incorrectly. Well, the people that chose blue think they chose correctly and that it is, in fact, the red people that chose incorrectly. This is a conflict of interests, and conflicts create division. People who are divided require a non-biased mediator so that order can be maintained and, because this mediator cares about the safety of both the red and the blue groups, it only makes sense that they should be given the authority to decide what is ok and is not ok for both groups. This is the most rational and logical option because the authority isn't biased towards red or blue, which means they will know what's best for everyone's interests. The police are there to make sure that all red and all blue people are all following all of the all-inclusive rules, mandated by the mediator, and all this is done for the greater good of society. I - I'm gonna get all choked up over here, just thinking about how nice the government is to do all that it does for us. They protect us from those fucking freaks that drink Pepsi. God I fucking hate those sub-human blue-tards! Red people generally have more money and are more successful, which means they are smarter. What started as a small neighborhood feud between Coke and Pepsi is actually how the gang warfare between the Bloods & Crips originated. That's right, they got the colors from Coke and Pepsi, which obviously is a lot more likely than a vast conspiracy involving powerful people manipulating reality in order to maintain control and power over the uninitiated masses. Fuck poor people. Oh, and how about those people that make their preference for Coke or Pepsi an aspect of their personality? They don't seem to understand that the color of the can is the only fucking difference. That's why I stick with Tab Cola, for those unmistakable metallic flavors and the uncomfortable, sticky feeling all over my body the next day. CHOICE # 4 They're the exact same store except for the fact that one is red and one is blue... and yet, you have a preference for one over the other. You made up some reasons for why they are different in your head, because you are under an immense amount of mind control. Ahh... consumerism: the arena of pointless choices. Why does only one company manufacture all the different brands of eyeglasses? Perhaps... to have control over the market? No - to have control over you, stupid - and no: this isn't a joke. It's a desperate plea, urging you to wake up and see this shit for what it really is, while you have this opportunity - this window - into the illusion. You see, they are getting desperate - and lately, the world seems like it has gone mad - which is part of their strategy, which is preventing you from seeing it. Why do you think there are suddenly twenty new M&M's flavor combinations? All these new Reese's Peanut Butter Cup's with minor alterations of essentially the same fucking thing? Let me guess: they're just having fun... right? Trying to stir up interest in candy bars? Or maybe for profit... right? This is just a business strategy to get your money... right? No... no... I'm afraid you're thinking way too small... with your logic and reason and all the other LIMITING BELIEFS that you have been - and are being - indoctrinated with: every fucking day! These are all pointless choices (brought to you by consumerism) that are trying to keep you distracted. Trying to keep your mind occupied. Why is Netflix trying to induce option paralysis? Why are the high-tech gadgets we use for entertainment purposes bombarding us with a constant onslaught of ads, new articles, stories, and a maddening amount of pointless bullshit?!?!?! They want you to be overwhelmed; they want you to freeze. They want you to have no sense of identity. They want life to overwhelm you with an endless list of pointless shit that has to get done in order to maintain... in order to maintain... to maintain what? THE ILLUSION, IDIOT. Ok: that was uncalled for. I don't think you're an idiot. I think that you know, in the bottom of your cold, gray heart , that the crazy shit I am saying sounds right (for some reason). They are manipulating reality in order to keep you under their power and control. I don't exactly know why, but I do know that they care a lot more about you being distracted than they care about worthless green paper. You know what? I bet the 1% doesn't give a shit about money: they simply have all of it just to piss you off. Why is all this corruption in the news all the time? The next fucking scandal that everyone can talk about? WHY is the news telling us to wear masks, get vaccinated and then, the following week, admitting COVID-19 is a bio-weapon? TO KEEP YOU DISTRACTED. THAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO THEM. Oh, and Walmart and Target's LOGOS both contain some occult symbolism. Yep: Target's logo is the astrological symbol for the sun and Walmart's logo is the Star of David... with the hexagon in the middle. The hexagon is symbolic of the cube. Once you understand that you can't not see the cube. It's fucking weird - but also a conversation for another time - when we can discuss why all of these well-known corporate LOGOs are symbolic of Saturn: https://preview.redd.it/vsv8fcvh834d1.jpg?width=511&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d9a14f0b398633824a2768e3128268aa6628c689 CHOICE # 5 You know what? I think I should devote a large portion of my life to watching a bunch of overpaid, mentally compromised, grown-ass men chase a ball around. I also think I should be passionate about the team that is closest to me in geographical proximity. This is not mind control, but as a conspiracy realist, I do like to point out that MK Ultra really did happen, and the CIA really did experiment with mind control back in the 1950's, but the program ended decades ago. I like to go on online conspiracy forums, and help people understand the reality of conspiracy theories, so they don't get sucked into lies like Q-anon or lizard people or THIS POST, WHICH IS OBVIOUSLY THE WORK OF A MENTALLY UNSTABLE INDIVIDUAL. Watching sports makes me feel safe, and comfortable, because it distracts me from all the bullshit of everyday life. It's good to have a nice distraction - and fill my mind with useless sports stats - or talk endlessly with the bro's about individual players strength's and weaknesses - in a boring, monotonous tone of voice - while I sip domestic piss-water beer. I don't want to think too deeply about things because it starts to make me really uncomfortable when I have to confront reality. I'd rather just not worry about it and see what happens. Who am I but a lowly speck of insignificant, worthless dog shit in this giant, scary universe, where I am completely powerless to do anything but take whatever beating the world feels like dishing out to me that day? I dunno. Maybe Jesus will come back and good will win out in the end. Good always wins in the end - that's just the way it works - so I don't really have to worry about anything. God is good. My little brother doesn't like sports at all. He likes to put on girls makeup, and is always depressed and confused and obsessing about some dumb shit. We're lucky to live in the modern age, with advancements in science that will allow my brother to medically transition into the woman that he always should have been - and always truly was - on the inside. Some assholes don't think that trans women are women. They just don't understand how science works, and don't care to learn. They are just misogynistic, transphobic assholes. That's right: if you don't think that you can be born a man and then change into a woman that means you are transphobic. You hate trans people because you don't want to believe that a man can change into a woman. Anyway - that's my brother -not me. I like guy shit... because I'm normal. CHOICE # 666 The choice of the beast Oh NO! Everyone hates politics - which is why I hid it at the end - because I know nobody is still reading this. I've alienated myself from the audience, with all the confusing switching between dialogues of seemingly different people and JUST BECAUSE I BET there will be some DIP-CLIP that says "voting is how we get things done around here." HA! Nice try, but this isn't about politics; this is a meta-analysis of WHY it's NO POLITICS. The short answer is that participating in this is as pointless as those people above, participating in gang warfare against their fellow man. "THOSE PEOPLE?" What do you mean, those people? Black people? THIS GUYS RACIST. No, even worse: HE'S INTOLERANT. The human race has become far too soft, weak and emasculated by the pesticides and environmental toxins that get dumped all over us, every day! GET VACCINATED for other people, you SELFISH CONSPIRACY THEORIST. This is why we aren't going to reach herd immunity and we will have to deal with COVID-19 for years to come: because of people like you. WHY WOULD I trust a RANDOM, intolerant asshole on Reddit, who watched a YouTube video about lizard people, over EXPERTS who WENT TO SCHOOL for years to become indoctrinated, believe everything the MSM tells them, and completely LACK the ability to critically think?! All my life I heard that I "need to go to college", and today I couldn't be happier that I am not of a "higher education" because, from what I've gathered, they are some of the most CLOSE-MINDED people on the planet. LIMITING BELIEFS. That's what trendy these days. I'm not done yet! Yes, I'm gonna talk about the donkey and the elephant: not only are politics bullshit; those who participate in politics are participating in a terrible, evil practice. Why would you affiliate with a political party and tell people what you think they can and cannot do? Can't you see that's the crux of the problem? I know things are fucked when the majority of people are of the opinion that we need to FIX the government (change it, drain the swamp, bureaucracy, etc.) They don't get it - we don't need to change the government - we need to END the government. Government is the single biggest threat to humanity. "But they protect us from the BAD people." Guess what? "The bad people" are there because of the government. The government needs the bad people to be there, in order to maintain their "illusion of legitimacy" (credit - Jim@EOI) and make themselves seem needed. THE BAD PEOPLE are the people who protect us. The sooner you understand that, the better off you are. And people are still talking about election fraud because they think that Trump is GOOD. Can't you see the mind control? How are these people this BLIND to reality? Manipulation of reality. Look... it's the superpowers. The greatest countries in the world! But why do they have the exact same color scheme as all the pointless choices? How can they be united? This is the divided states and the divided kingdom, and they have conquered. DIVIDE & CONQUER. Oh, wait... some patriots went off to find a new home and fight for freedom from the oppression of the taxation of the royal bloody palace? Only to go and make a new country even more oppressive and with higher taxes, some two-hundred odd years later? Are you SURE that it wasn't actually to commit GENOCIDE against all the indigenous BROWN PEOPLE, whose genetic makeup allowed them to have a far deeper understanding of spirituality? CoUlDn't bE Th@T.... I'M DRAWING A LINE IN THE SAND I am so sick of the average Redditor - who thinks they're smart because they're an atheist who understands science - arguing with me, using all their SUPER-BELIEVABLE LIMITING BELIEFS. I know on Reddit it's hard to tell who is real and who ... isn't real - but these people are seemingly the majority now - and they're fucked. They don't even actually understand what science is. Science isn't chopping off your dick to be a woman. Let's talk about the actual scientist who performed many series of actual scientific experiments to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that people are able to control material reality with only the use of their minds. Why doesn't anyone ever want to talk about THAT science? What it seems is that every thing in this world - every institution, religion, and academic study - has been corrupted to keep us under control. The people that are in control of this world have access to esoteric knowledge that they have hidden from the masses to keep for themselves. This knowledge involves the ability to manipulate reality, which they use for power and keeping the rest of us down and powerless. From what I can tell, the thing they don't want us to know is that we are powerful beings, with capabilities that have been hidden and unused. Every person needs to understand that they are a powerful being that doesn't need any help or anyone to save them. WE have the power to control our own destiny. If the majority would start believing in their power and themselves, we would have a chance at ending this shitty reality manipulation and living as non-dual beings of love - as the true source of creation made us - powerful, independent beings with everything we need, and no need to evolve or learn shitty lessons about suffering. Unfortunately, it seems like most people would prefer to keep their creature comforts, believe that this isn't as bad as I am making it sound, and remain here, in the safety of familiarity... away from the fear of the unknown. And that makes me so fucking sad that it brings tears to my eyes. |
2024.06.02 06:50 DespicableExistence1 Anyone else's parents absolutely refuse to accept that they messed up?
Like, there's been so many instances where I knew what to do, and I asked them what I should be doing and it was completely off. They force me into doing things, especially my AM, that she barely knows about and only because the end result is something to brag about, and then makes me listen to her 'advice' while in reality, her 'advice' is just marketing scams meant to delude parents. For example, the first red flag was when I asked AM what I should be doing to excel in my field. I get a "Oh I don't know, you figure it out, we're too old." I'm fine with that!! But then she comes over and tells me "No, you're doing it wrong, do THIS instead." I'm fine with that too, I do as she says. Then later, she says "YOU made that decision! We always KNEW better. Ofcourse it's your fault you didn't get to where WE expected you to be." I'm like ??? I was 16 for fucks sake. You guys asked me to choose a career path at 12 and it comprised of: engineering and failure. When I did choose engineering, you give me advice that even you aren't sure is right or wrong. I feel like in an attempt to get me into a good college, they overdid everything which ended with me being good at a lot of different things but not good enough at each to get a college(since everything here is decided by exam scores). They pulled me out of cram school before the two most important years for cram school, forced me into some random school for english(when mine was already pretty good???? They told me it was necessary for foreign colleges, but we weren't targetting them anyways bc of money issues so???? Why even do that if we aren't going that way????). Then decided to get me to take biology in school but I don't need it for engineering so again, WHY???? Like I said, I ended up being "just alright" at different things but not enough to actually secure a seat in one. If one thing was the main target, (inhales) WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DEVIATE??? WHY THE FUCK WAS I FORCED TO DO UNNECESSARY SHIT???? A 93.5 in school, 94th percentile in an exam with 1.4mil people(rank at around 80k), and probably somewhere in the 25k range in the next stage with 250k people(ignoring the lovely caste system our country deems necessary) On paper, those statistics, from an outsider's pov sounds alright but I won't get any fucking college with all this. Sorry I'm just frustrated about my parents' bad decisions which were then blamed upon me because apparently they can do no wrong. It's not like I'm absolutely hopeless though, I am getting some colleges, but parents won't send me there either due to the city not being upto their standards or it being a private college and then they won't be able to brag about it to people+I get mentally harassed for 4 years being told I'm good for nothing(government colleges are higher valued). Anyways, I'm done. Probably going to another city to try to prep and get a better college that my family accepts. I can't stay here with people ordering me around when they themselves know barely anything about what I do while also not wanting to even educate themselves about it("why should we? We'll deal with it when you're around and when the time comes.")
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