Best excuse absent

ok i don't really use reddit besides to read occasionally and i'm typing this on an old computer with a broken a key and the shift keys don't work so excuse any eyestrain reading this lol. also, sorry for all the intro story I just don't want there to be many plot holes. so i [17f] am trying my best to cram this weekend for the ap gov exam that is tomorrow. i find it really hard to be around my family while studying so yesterday me and my bf [of 3 years] went to panera to study. today after church, my family was supposed to help with this community event [setting up my church's booth and stuff] and ofc she was being rude as usual about me being too tired and just sitting around. she likes to complain saying i never do fun things with my family [her] anymore and whenever i'm with my family i am sleeping or up in my room studying. in my room studying, yes. sleeping... no. if i ever try to nap during the day, she yells at me for being lazy and tells me i need to work out and stop eating so much because its making me tired. i am in 3 sports and 3 ap classes as well as my school's musical and show choir so dare i say, i'm a bit over worked and even i deserve a nap before dance class. today she is mad because at the community event i went off with my boyfriends family to go on a slide. she was angry saying i only have fun with them and i'm using her as a chauffeur [i have a license and car which she doesn't let me go out on my own with] and i only talk to her when i need money or i'm asleep. i love my family, spending time with them and playing games, but as an introvert, when i am home, i want my space so this is not true. so she comes into my room after the community event and goes into my closet and starts to remove all my clothes and put them on my bed. i tell her that i will gladly help her to clean my closet after my exam tomorrow and i really need this time to study. well she says i can keep studying and she wont distract me. well its really hard to do that when someone is yelling at you, giving you reasons as to why you should break up with your boyfriend and saying you hate them while throwing away all items of clothing that you love besides dresses and conservative pieces that i would never wear in public. i bought a lot of my clothes with my own money but because she says she owns my room and this house she is putting my favorite things into garbage bags in front of my face. at this point, i have tried to push past her to leave my room several times to go study but she had forced me back and things are getting heated. she has thrown out a shirt that i wear at least once a week and i try to get it back. so i try to leave my room by jumping out the window because things are getting really heated on her end and i'm very scared. i'm on the second floor but the jump is doable if i climb the roof a bit to where the ground is higher. i keep a hammer in my dresser drawer in case there is ever a fire because one of the latches on the window gets stuck. this would not break the window at all. she runs up behind me and i'm very scared of what may happen so i turn around quickly and she yells at me and threatens grounding me even more than she already has [she took my phone and good laptop]. so i take this moment to take the shirt that i love and sit on my bed with it. she says she is going to get the shirt back and i say [i know this was probably not a good response] "you will have to come rip it out of my hands" and she comes running over and she denies it but she punched me [in the face if i wouldn't have moved] in my shoulder so i push her off of me and she hits a cup that was sitting on my dresser which goes flying with water everywhere. then i try and run but she has dragged me and is clawing at me and [again she denies] biting my leg while i am dragging her almost 200 pound body to my door, screaming for help. i get out and run as fast as i can down the stairs and out the backdoor into my backyard like i usually do when she fights with me but i couldn't let her find me behind the creek so i unlocked our gate through the front yard where my dad was cutting grass. she asks whats wrong because i mean i probably look crazy. i'm shaking and crying and i'm just like "she's crazy" and i run off our property line and hide in a neighbor up the street's bush. I'm clearly visible from the road but I knew if they drove by, they would pass me without seeing. so my mom sends my dad to go find me and he drives right past as planned but as he drives back around, he sees me and tells me to get in the car. i'm reluctant but he says he wont take me home and just wants to drive a lap and talk. we drive around town a bit and i tell him the truth of what happens. he says he understands because he's been married to her for so long but says i need to apologize and he doesn't know why she does the things she does. when i go inside i sit on the couch as he goes upstairs and i listen to her tell him that i am abusive and that i pushed her into a wall where she almost broke her back and she should have called the cops on me. she said she would have never hit her mom [her mom is the sweetest woman to ever walk this earth who has never told a person no and works so hard every day to do so much for my mom]. she has told me i will not be going to my out of state dream school [ i mainly want to go there to get away from family lol and be on the coast to study marine biology and my state does not have good programs for that] and my boyfriend has committed to that college [he is a senior, i am a junior] even though his major is offered anywhere and is going there mainly because i probably will too. i am having a very hard time studying because of her and there is no way i can go out of state without getting educational scholarships and i am not allowed to have a job. i feel as because my mom presented herself as a threat to me and even hit me, i had every right to act the way i did. so aitah?

ok i don't really use reddit besides to read occasionally and i'm typing this on an old computer with a broken a key and the shift keys don't work so excuse any eyestrain reading this lol. also, sorry for all the intro story I just don't want there to be many plot holes. so i [17f] am trying my best to cram this weekend for the ap gov exam that is tomorrow. i find it really hard to be around my family while studying so yesterday me and my bf [of 3 years] went to panera to study. today after church, my family was supposed to help with this community event [setting up my church's booth and stuff] and ofc she was being rude as usual about me being too tired and just sitting around. she likes to complain saying i never do fun things with my family [her] anymore and whenever i'm with my family i am sleeping or up in my room studying. in my room studying, yes. sleeping... no. if i ever try to nap during the day, she yells at me for being lazy and tells me i need to work out and stop eating so much because its making me tired. i am in 3 sports and 3 ap classes as well as my school's musical and show choir so dare i say, i'm a bit over worked and even i deserve a nap before dance class. today she is mad because at the community event i went off with my boyfriends family to go on a slide. she was angry saying i only have fun with them and i'm using her as a chauffeur [i have a license and car which she doesn't let me go out on my own with] and i only talk to her when i need money or i'm asleep. i love my family, spending time with them and playing games, but as an introvert, when i am home, i want my space so this is not true. so she comes into my room after the community event and goes into my closet and starts to remove all my clothes and put them on my bed. i tell her that i will gladly help her to clean my closet after my exam tomorrow and i really need this time to study. well she says i can keep studying and she wont distract me. well its really hard to do that when someone is yelling at you, giving you reasons as to why you should break up with your boyfriend and saying you hate them while throwing away all items of clothing that you love besides dresses and conservative pieces that i would never wear in public. i bought a lot of my clothes with my own money but because she says she owns my room and this house she is putting my favorite things into garbage bags in front of my face. at this point, i have tried to push past her to leave my room several times to go study but she had forced me back and things are getting heated. she has thrown out a shirt that i wear at least once a week and i try to get it back. so i try to leave my room by jumping out the window because things are getting really heated on her end and i'm very scared. i'm on the second floor but the jump is doable if i climb the roof a bit to where the ground is higher. i keep a hammer in my dresser drawer in case there is ever a fire because one of the latches on the window gets stuck. this would not break the window at all. she runs up behind me and i'm very scared of what may happen so i turn around quickly and she yells at me and threatens grounding me even more than she already has [she took my phone and good laptop]. so i take this moment to take the shirt that i love and sit on my bed with it. she says she is going to get the shirt back and i say [i know this was probably not a good response] "you will have to come rip it out of my hands" and she comes running over and she denies it but she punched me [in the face if i wouldn't have moved] in my shoulder so i push her off of me and she hits a cup that was sitting on my dresser which goes flying with water everywhere. then i try and run but she has dragged me and is clawing at me and [again she denies] biting my leg while i am dragging her almost 200 pound body to my door, screaming for help. i get out and run as fast as i can down the stairs and out the backdoor into my backyard like i usually do when she fights with me but i couldn't let her find me behind the creek so i unlocked our gate through the front yard where my dad was cutting grass. she asks whats wrong because i mean i probably look crazy. i'm shaking and crying and i'm just like "she's crazy" and i run off our property line and hide in a neighbor up the street's bush. I'm clearly visible from the road but I knew if they drove by, they would pass me without seeing. so my mom sends my dad to go find me and he drives right past as planned but as he drives back around, he sees me and tells me to get in the car. i'm reluctant but he says he wont take me home and just wants to drive a lap and talk. we drive around town a bit and i tell him the truth of what happens. he says he understands because he's been married to her for so long but says i need to apologize and he doesn't know why she does the things she does. when i go inside i sit on the couch as he goes upstairs and i listen to her tell him that i am abusive and that i pushed her into a wall where she almost broke her back and she should have called the cops on me. she said she would have never hit her mom [her mom is the sweetest woman to ever walk this earth who has never told a person no and works so hard every day to do so much for my mom]. she has told me i will not be going to my out of state dream school [ i mainly want to go there to get away from family lol and be on the coast to study marine biology and my state does not have good programs for that] and my boyfriend has committed to that college [he is a senior, i am a junior] even though his major is offered anywhere and is going there mainly because i probably will too. i am having a very hard time studying because of her and there is no way i can go out of state without getting educational scholarships and i am not allowed to have a job. i feel as because my mom presented herself as a threat to me and even hit me, i had every right to act the way i did. so aitah?

And I didn't even know how much until today. Most of the time I don't even think to apologize. I think it's best to never talk it about it and stay away from (isolate) from folks so it doesn't happen. I'm not sure how to reconcile it and I'm afraid of hurting people. A big reason I took ownership for my life was not to roll around with wild unabated behavoirs that harms folks. Yet I have and due to the severity of my condition I don't know if I can permeantly make it stop.
When that fleeing symptoms hits. Literally nothing looks or feels safe. It's not an excuse for my actions at all. Just when I'm in thar state it's like all I know and understand until I come out of it......

Trigger warnings for threats of violence, talks of suicide, and emotional abuse. (Also mentions covid 19)
And it's long.
So I, 19 F, developed depression and suicidal ideation at the very young age of 10. (For a couple of reasons, the main one is that it runs in both sides of my family)
When I came to my parents saying I wished I was dead, my mother started helping me manage it and started me with therapy. My father personally told me that I could always tell him if I was feeling suicidal. (I've been passively suicidal mostly, so I always wish I was gone instead of planning to hurt myself, with about two exceptions over 10 years.)
One day, I was really struggling, and my father happened to knock on my door. When he saw I was crying, he asked what was wrong. I thought back to what he had said about confiding in him, so I decided to open up and be vulnerable and ask for help.
He screamed at me that he was not going to spend money or ruin his reputation by taking me to a mental hospital, and that I had to cut it out right there and then, before leaving me there, crying, and heart shattering. I had been vulnerable, and he spat at me, and unconsciously told me that what I was feeling was bad and that it wasn't okay. And it also told me he was two-faced because he'd promised he'd listen, and instead, he stomped on my heart.
I never really saw him the same way again, after that. I struggled with depression for 6 long, hard years, and I never once told him anything more, relying on my mother (who is amazing, and I love her. If any of you are worried about role models, know that she is my favorite person on earth, and I would move heaven and earth for her.)
With each year that passed after that incident, he slowly changed. Since then, he's been more distant. He's gotten angry outbursts that would scare everyone in my family. When he'd lose a job, he'd go into a cycle of treating everyone in the family horribly before getting a new one and suddenly being happy again.
I still live with my family, (older brother and sister have moved out. The abuse started between 2014-2020, so my brother didn't rectally experience it, but my older sister did, and left as soon as she could.) I have disabilities. I have ADHD, depression, anxiety, and social pragmatic communication disorder. (the last one is a disorder that makes it hard for me with social situations and social cues, and also sometimes makes my tone of voice come out in a completely different way than I want) I struggled with jobs, until I got one that taught vocational skills. I'm happy to report that I now have a new one starting soon.
But I haven't moved out, and I'm turning 20 soon. I've stayed for a couple of reasons. The first is that I'm not ready to move out. Both emotionally and realistically. My room is a mess most of the time, and I don't have the skills to live with people quite yet. I still have much to learn.
The second is that I help my little sister. Both my mom and father work far away. So I help out by driving my little sister places and picking her up and dropping her off. Third, I just registered for school, so I won't have to pay rent while in school, as per the rule that my parents set.
Lastly, I don't make enough money to sustain myself in this economy. I will be getting a job after school, and moving out, and telling my dad I never want to see him again, and going no contact.
I haven't heard anything nice come out of my father's mouth in years. He often yells at me, and I don't remember the last time he told me he loved me. I struggle with subtle things, so often I do best when someone straight up tells me "good job," "I'm proud of you," or "I love you." He also is often negative, to the point I don't like being around him.
Two years ago, my mom and little sister were on a trip, so It was just me and him. I had a funeral to go to, and it wasn't until after I attended that I discovered he had tested positive for covid. And he didn't tell me. My mom did. Over text.
I hurriedly took a covid test, and thank God it was negative. I apologized to my best friend (the funeral was for her little brother) and explained I would have taken precautions if I had known I was exposed. She assured me I was okay because I hadn't known.
When my mom and sister got home, we deep cleaned the house. For some reason, my dad said he just needed to wash his hands and stay safe, but my mom made him quarantine anyway. (He also had been very strict in the past about covid, so his insistence about being fine was confusing)
I opened up and said I was frustrated he never told me, and he responded with the excuse that I would have just worried too much and asked what I would have done anyway. I told him I would have worn a mask to the funeral, and I definitely wouldn't have hung around him. I even told him that I went to work with a mask. (And I told my manager I was exposed, but negative)
He then started yelling at me that I was immature, and was never going to understand life and that I needed to grow up. When I countered that he needed to man up and left, he got even angrier. My mother stepped in to try and calm him down, and I listened with tears falling in my room as he threatened to kick me out before going on to yell at my mother instead.
My mother realized not too long after that my father's relationship with us kids was so damaged and broken that he needed to start doing better. He refuses to go to therapy, but we often talk to a therapist ourselves.
He treats me the worst of all. My mother and sisters still get treated badly, but for some reason, he hates me the worst. And he's even said to my little sister's face that she is his favorite child. Because of this, she often is anxious about staying in his good graces, continuing to play the violin, because he wants her to, not sharing about her social and general anxiety‐because she thinks it's because out of all his children, she has the least mental health struggles.
Recently, I've grown increasingly frustrated with him. He refuses to understand my sensory issues, and while he's not overtly cruel, he's still unkind. But it all came to a head last night, and I scared myself with how I reacted.
Last night, he was snacking on grapes when my cat, Everest, started sniffing them. I asked Alexa if grapes were okay for cats (a common occurance. Everest likes to eat human food for some reason) Alexa responded that grapes were poisonous for cats. I panicked and demanded my father stop trying to feed them to him.
He instead took a grape and tossed it to my cat to eat. Everest is not very bright, despite being very cute, so I was worried that he'd actually eat it. My father thought it would be funny. However, because I don't understand social cues (like teasing), I honestly saw it as my father trying to purposely poison my cat. (Who is my emotional support animal)
I screamed at him that if he killed my cat, I would personally kill him. Looking back, I'm very afraid of how irrationally I acted. I'm very impulsive (an ADHD thing, sadly), especially when I'm acting on emotions. I have never threatened anyone like that before, nor do I ever plan on acting on what I said. I am very sorry and afraid of what i said. I think I reacted because I was irrational, impulsive, and after years and years of abuse, I've grown sick and tired of being treated horribly by the man who is supposed to love and support me.
Today, my mother sat us both down, and I apologized for what I said. My father said he thought I needed help. That what I did would get me in trouble. And he didn't say it in a kind way. He said it in an "I can tell police, and I can ruin your life." Kind of way. While I agree what I said was wrong, he didn't seem to accept my apology, and he took no responsibility for what actions he had taken, too.
I told him that I no longer wanted to call him dad. For years, I have stayed silent. I have pretended to go along while leaving the room to cry. I have put up with so much for so long, and I have finally hit my breaking point. So I broke my silence.
When I told him how I felt, saying that he doesn't treat me right, and hasn't for years, he denied doing anything wrong, and repeatedly said that I was the one who threatened him. I was the one in the wrong. And while I agree I did overstep, I still know in my heart that he should never deserve the title of dad (from me, at least) I told him he wad In denial, and left, tears streaming down my face.
I don't know what to do. I've been afraid to break my silence in fear he'll pull the "I'm kicking you out" card. But I'm tired of being treated like shit.
I'm sorry this got so long.

"I'm sorry I told them, BUT they're my best friends! I tell them everything! I didn't even think about it!" is a weird explanation and not really an apology. And I find it weird to tell your friends every intimate detail about your romantic partner without a second thought. I think it just pisses me off (I know it's just a sitcom, so maybe it's more like, strikes a nerve?) that Ted turns it on Stella just because it (obviously understandably) upset her, and says she's using it as an excuse not to trust Ted.
(Just rewatched. Best part of that scene that gets me pissed at Ted, is the cutaway -- Stella: "I realize it's weird, not many people go 5 years without having sex" --cutaway to the bar Barney: "13 years?!" Randy: "I peaked really young" *crying laughing* sorry I'm on my computer and can't access the emojis)
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My fiancé (M-25) and I (F-25) have been together for 7.5 years and engaged for 3.5 years. We are getting married on our anniversary August of this year(2024).
Recently his sister graduated college which is a huge accomplishment. She invited her bf, their parents, their aunt and uncle, and ourselves. We spent the whole day taking pictures and spending the day celebrating her since it is a huge accomplishment. His sister and I haven’t historically had the best of relationships but this past year we’re have definitely been working on getting better. I even asked her to help me with wedding planning, got her a job with my company, etc.
Later that day we all went home and I was scrolling on FB and IG. I noticed she posted about her graduation, she posted pictures of everyone… except me. I was hurt about it because I feel like I’ve been a huge supporter for her but she excluded me out of ALL pictures. I’m always told I’m super sensitive and take things too personal with his family. This is bc his family is huge and I come from a small family. So I went to my fiancée and asked him if I was being too sensitive about the situation and he said no but I should tell her how i feel. I told him no I don’t want to simply bc I felt like I was hurt and even if I tell her it wouldn’t unhurt me.
Fast forward, I read the messages he sent his sister the following day. We share a tablet and I happen to use it for school work. I saw that he told his sister I was upset about it and she said it was bc she didn’t have any pictures of us…which is a lie. He sent him some pictures he had on his phone and wrote up a whole speech about how I have abandonment issues and how she shouldn’t feel bad etc.
I was livid bc I felt like he was excusing her actions. Plus it wasn’t his place to talk about my mental health situation. I feel like I’m constantly fighting for a spot in his family. I’m trying to be there for them, include them in outings etc and I feel like it’s not enough. My fiancée is aware of all this but he doesn’t see it my way. He feels like they’re just being family and that how they get along. Again making excuses for them. Idk how to proceed or approach this conversation. Please help.

TW: Self harm , suicide , DV
Since I was a kid my mom was a giant “boy mom” she always stated that she didn’t want any girls and was very disappointed when she found out she was having me despite having many miscarriages. She lost a baby boy late in her pregnancy before me and she’s never gotten over it I presume. When I was a kid I was always pushed to the side and not payed attention to. My brother (4 years older than me) was always was praised by my mom for being in sports despite always getting in trouble and bad grades at school , and I was never praised for the slightest things , I was in honors my whole life , and I remeber trying so hard to get a “my student is on the honor roll” sticker for the car and when I got I asked my mom would she put it on her car she laughed , said no, and I never saw the sticker again. In middle school , I was bullied relentlessly and my mom simply didn’t care. My brother was sipping lean and smoking weed at this time and involved in some bad stuff. They would argue everyday but she would still make it clear who was her favorite child. It wasn’t until I attempted in 7th grade that she ever bothered to care. It was also that night that I had shown my parents my SH scars. My dad seemed genuinely sad my Mom seemed like it was a burden to deal with. she put me on therapy. This was around the time my brother left for his 1st university out of state. During my time in highschool I was captain of a dance team and again excelled academically. Everytime my brother would come home to visit I would be pushed to the side to the point where I wouldn’t even want to be involved. Everything was always about him. How smart he was , how amazing he was , how he was such a fun baby and I was so boring to be around. This still goes on to this day. I’ve been in abusive relationships and my mom one time told me to “deal with it” basically. I broke up with the guy despite my mom “loving him”. My brother also hit his girlfriends , attempted to hit my mom and has fought my dad. Eventually he was kicked out of 4 universities and my mom paid his rent 2 hours away from the home to somehow repair the damage she had done to me. During COVID I was diagnosed with Bipolar type 2 , and later changed to BPD. I go to DBT which is expensive , and I thank her for paying for it. But she always throws it in my face. If I even mention that I’m sad she says “so I can cancel that expensive therapy now? It’s not working? Why would I continue to pay?” My brother on my 24th birthday ruined it by basically only talking about himself and spitting out crazy consistory theories that my mom believes because he is a “prodigy”. He has no stable job and resells on eBay. My mom still pays his rent. He spend all his earned money on luxury and designer things to make it seem like he’s rich on the internet. He’s stolen my clothes that I’ve bought just to flex them on IG , and when I asked for them back my mom told me to just buy a new one (a new $700 jacket) that I had worked very hard for. My mom told me that I was being selfish and that I should be appreciative because he bought me an expensive bracelet when I graduated nursing school. I told her that I’d throw it away or sell it because there’s no way that she thinks that buying someone something lets them treat them any type of way. My brother has called me horrible names and cursed at me, we’ve gotten into physical fights and somehow I was still the bad guy. Recently he’s had a baby with his ex gf. I love her to death, she is an amazing person and really has tried to fix him. He hits her constantly and hit her while she was pregnant. They have gotten into it so bad that she went to the hospital and had to lie. He’s an absent father , he brought a 32 inch TV with his PS5 the entire time she gave birth and made fun of other dads that were helping their wives. She had a traumatic delivery and all he did was complain. Baby was in the NICU, and he complained that they couldn’t stay in the patient rooms to the point where they had to be escorted out. Fast forward, baby is 6 months , he doesn’t know how to change a diaper , make a bottle , get her dressed , all he does is carry her around or put her in her baby chair and play PS5. She completely excuses this behavior and says he’s a great dad. I would like to also add that his ex gf lives with my mom and he rarely sees the baby maybe once or twice every couple of weeks. My mom again condones this and says that he “has to go to the gym” and “have his own life” I’m now pregnant with my fiancée and I’m terrified of raising my child near her. She’s sweet when she wants to be but when it comes to my brother he can do no wrong and women are the evil ones. Today she told me that moms has no reason to be exhausted, and need to figure it out. I told her how me and my fiance have discussed taking wake shifts while baby is a newborn to even out the responsibilities. She told me that was ridiculous and that my fiance needs his rest more than me. I’m thinking of moving away out of state but then I’d be moving far from my fiancée’s family, who are wonderful. I want my child to have a relationship with her but it’s so hard. I have no idea what to do. Sometimes she’s nice and sometimes she goes on about how I could go and she doesn’t need me in her life. It’s always one or the other . I just wish things were different.

A while ago, my friend was one of the lucky few to get a pair of tickets for a certain mega stars concert, whereas I wasn’t as lucky. She bought them for her and her mother but wasn’t totally on board with going because she didn’t want to sit in nosebleeds for a concert. I told her that I would happily buy them if she offered them to me first. I even told her I would happily pay more than what she paid for her because people are selling them for a lot higher than they’re worth. She agreed and told me that if she was going to sell them she would offer them to me first. We’ve talked about it a few times since then with me expressing an interest to buy the tickets if she doesn’t want to go. I know people who would love to go and would have no problem finding a second to go with, especially my best friend.
I’m a huge fan of this artist and have been for a long time. I even took this friend to the singers last concert which was her first time. It’s known by pretty much everyone that knows me I’m a huge fan.
A few days ago she happily walks up to me and brags about how she sold her tickets for x amount of dollars and I would be upset, almost the exact amount I offered them to her for.
I’m in disbelief. Then I’m angry. Then I called her out and said “you said you would offer them to me first, and now you’re bragging about selling them? That’s a dick move.”
She suddenly gets all defensive and annoyed and starts spouting out excuses.
“Oh it was mom that sold the tickets.” “Your mom sold your tickets that were in your name?” “We wanted to sell them as a pair.” “I know tons of people who would go. I told you I would love to take best friend.” “You would have paid x amount for a ticket?” “I TOLD you I would pay that much for a ticket.”
And that’s it. We haven’t talked since then. I’ve just given her the cold shoulder when I’ve seen her. Im hurting because someone I care about showed how little they care about me. She cannot process why I would be upset and does not understand that she did anything wrong. And it’s been a torrent of emotions since then. Part of me thinks that they’re just concert tickets and it’s not worth it. Part of me thinks I shouldn’t be so hard on her, she’s younger and well, young people do stupid things. But then there’s also a part of me that’s adamant that after everything I’ve done for this friend, she turns around and does this to me. It shows it’s been a one sided friendship and I should don’t want this person in my life.
But, they’re still someone I care about. To paraphrase the Doctor “you betrayed me. You betrayed my trust, you betrayed our friendship, You let me down…but do you think I care for you so little that betraying me would make a difference in how I feel?”
I just don’t know.

Hello everyone,
So a couple days ago I got a random message from a girls saying “hey Mitchel you still coming over for dinner?”
Straight on I thought it was a scammer as she has a nice profile picture and is randomly messaging me.
So I answered “I wish but as you know I’m not him” and basically tried to see what shady link she would send me as most scammers do this.
But now about 4 days later she still didn’t send me anything shady.
She said after a couple of message that it was her work phone and rather had us talking on her private number. So I added here private number with a different profile picture but it looks like the same girl. So I messaged her” hey masha” (she isn’t called that but I thought scammers might have different profiles and she would straight on say hey and then I would have catched her) but she responded with just hi and then followed by a message of my name so it was no evidence.
So now we basically talk about our days and her life.
I asked her about it being a bit strange that such a beautiful girl would randomly send me a message as I often when this happens I get shady links to strange sites. She obviously responded that she wasn’t mad that I thought that as she is very optimistic and like to laugh(not sure what that has to do with it but okay)
So I later on asked what her hobbies were and if she had some action pictures (just to see if I could get more pictures) she said no why would I want pictures of myself. So she went talking about a trade she just closed I said I want interested in trading crypto I’m more into stocks she said that was fine and we talked about different things.
!!!!so then eventually I said something about her making a selfie holding a knife for verification but she responded “no why don’t be so strange I’ll do a video call with then you can see me well” this obviously scared the living daylight out of me so a made the excuse I had to shave and clean my space to make a good first impression and she agreed to do it when ever I’m ready for it.
———————————————————————— So all I know now is that she is from London moved to the Netherlands (Wassenaar, I do live in The Netherlands asswell). her mom started seeing a Dutchman who she(this girl) doesn’t like yet as he doesn’t act like a dad to her. She had her own beauty salon in the uk and is looking for a spot in the NL to continue. She does work witha team of analysts who help her trade crypto (kinda shady but could be possible) She offers to do a video call (scammers won’t offer that mostly) She also has a strange way of writing a bit strange grammer but that could be Liverpool English as we say here in the Netherlands. She doesn’t have any socials as she isn’t so much into socials. (Strange for such cute girl but I personally don’t use anything else then WhatsApp either)
Maybe I should do the video call and see if she is real and asks here to show me the outside view to check car licenses if they are Dutch.
Oh yeah I did image search the two profile pictures and both numbers but nothing popped up only that it was a Dutch number at the KPN but yeah that proves nothing.
A insanely long text but hopefully someone knows what I can try else I think the video call would be a great choice as I straight see if she looks like the profile pic girl if it even is a girl.
It would be the strangest love story I ever heard of if it tends to be real. Let’s say I hope for the best cuz on paper she is the girl from an utopia, the 10/10 perfect, the golden ticket. But yeah it sounds to good to be true so I’m not convinced it is who she said.

I 30F am married happily to 30M. We live away from all of my family which is a first for my extended family. I live about 20 hours away from my sister Joan (28F) and about 12 hours away from my other sister Jenna (22FtM, maybe?). Jenna lives with our parents still and is getting her therapy degree, at least I think that's the degree? We don't talk so I have no idea tbh.
That's where the topic comes in. Jenna came out to us (our parents and both sisters) as possibly trans back in November. I don't have any issues. You do you as long as you aren't hurting yourself or pushing your ideals into someone else's face or trying to get someone else to 100% agree with you or they are "dead" to you.
My parents are stubborn and so are we. We are all strong-willed and when we form an opinion it is hard to get us to change it. I'm less that way than my other sisters and parents but still stubborn.
When Jenna came out to me it was over text. They came out with a new name and specifically said their old name "Jenna" (in this case) was their deadname and that they use they/them pronouns.
A lot to wrap my mind around but it is what it is. Again, if you aren't hurting anyone, you do you.
I didn't react as mature as I wish I would have and apologized shortly after. I was going through a lot because back in November (beginning) I found out I was pregnant on a Tuesday and by the Friday I was spotting and I miscarried that weekend. That weekend was the weekend before Thanksgiving and Thanksgiving day our Grandmother passed away at 93. It was expected but still very sad. I was also interviewing to move jobs to a better paying one and I started a new one first week of December. So that whole month was a whirlwind of emotions. I am not excusing it, just explaining. I shouldn't have reacted as I should I was an asshole for that. I will admit.
I was very hard on her because I wanted to make sure she really researched this and wasn't just trying to fall into a crowd and regret it later in life. I was trying to look out for her but I didn't show that in the best light. She blocked me for a bit and around Thanksgiving unblocked me (due to the circumstances).
Her birthday is also around that time and I wished her a Happy Birthday and this was her response to that:

One last chance. If you want to follow through with respecting me, then use my new name and pronouns. I am Jack. I go by they/them pronouns. Jenna is my deadname. Calling me that upsets me. Please respect this.

This is how she acted the entire time I was asking her questions before she blocked me. She said I disrespected her by asking her questions like the following:

• What happens if you don't get Testosterone if SHTF and they are out of the meds?
• Do you really want to rely on something that you have to take every day for the rest of your life?
• Why do you want to fight your body so much to be another gender?

While I didn't say those questions in that way, that is the gist. I also had other issues like how there are reports of LGBTQ-whatever people (the name is getting way to long for me to remember so later I will refer to them as "the gang" I don't mean anything negative by it, it is just tiring to type out) saying "We are coming for your children!" in marches and stuff so I brought that up.
She just thinks me having a differing opinion and wanting the best for her (and her to not make a medical mistake by cutting her boobs off and later regretting it when she is my age or later) is disrespecting her.
We were never close growing up cause of the age difference and I was always jealous that her and Joan were close. So, Jenna and I haven't talked since end of February and I don't think we will except for special occasions.
During that whole process my dad (62M) blocked me on Discord due to how I reacted and my opinions on everything. He unblocked me after medical issues happened with him and he was able to think about it but now I know that if he finds out about something happening with my sisters, I could lose him too. Which sucks.
Anyway, Joan also blocked me because she thinks the gang could do no wrong and doesn't believe the countless news stories I sent her. We have talked up until Wednesday but I am going no contact with her now. Lately, I would text her something like:

Hubby said I can't use our future Subaru for work so I want to start being petty with him with the car. I need ideas lol We paid off my car this week btw. Yay!

She took it seriously, like we weren't communicating and being silly. Hubby doesn't care and it isn't that big of a deal. We share everything. Our communication is great and while it wasn't at first we worked on it and have gotten 1000x better.
She responded being hostile:

Yay for paying off the car. How about you work on communication or you know...since your the one paying for it you get the car...

I'm the primary income earner cause hubby has Autism and it works for us. He will be the stay at home dad when we have kids and we have no issues.
I've since asked her about that and she agrees she shouldn't have said this but since I said I wanted to be "petty" she thought the lol didn't mean anything and just went towards us having an issue in our marriage. I showed Hubby while we were texting (when this was originally happening back in February) and we were both shocked.
Last we talked I tried to clear the air and I tried to talk to her about how she always comes at me and I feel (used those words exactly) as if I come at her with a joke or something not serious and she punches me in the face without asking me if this is serious or a joke first. She just comes swinging.
It has been like this since the Jenna situation back in November.
What started this whole thing was me trying to get another perspective on why people were outraged over the whole Farm Folks' tweet about boob jiggle physics. I find it hilarious but she was insulted by it and I was trying to ask why and she would just attack me when I was legit trying to understand. I was even screenshotting the texts as it was happening and asking my friend and my friend could tell I was trying to get another POV (cause my friend also thinks it is just funny) and also didn't understand why Joan was coming out swinging.
So, I cut it off. I don't have her blocked but message notifications are silenced and if she calls (doubt she will) I will just let it go to voicemail. She wanted me to call (cause this was during work) and clear the air but there is nothing that I could say or she could say that couldn't be said over text. We have differing opinions and while we used to be close, we are close no more.
I cut them off for their lack of trying to understand my perspective as well as just being hostile towards me because I have a different opinion than they do.
Am I in the wrong for cutting them off? How do I tell my parents this has happened? They are coming to visit soon so I want to do this in person.
My mom (62F) is a people pleaser and just wants to keep the peace so she will try to talk to my sisters but I want to make it clear that there is nothing they could say (my sisters) at this point that will help. Should I be worried about my dad cutting me off? It seems like he is on the same side as Joan where the gang can do no wrong. I realize it isn't all of them, in fact, there are A LOT, including myself (I'm bi), that disagree with the whole children thing and just want them to stop forcing their views on the rest of the world. Just let people live.
TL;DR I cut my sisters off because they weren't trying to see my perspective on 22FtM coming out as trans and 28F was just hostile to me ever since. Dad 62M blocked me and then unblocked me on discord (where we talk primarily) due to my views as well as so he seems on the same board as 28F and so I am worried about losing him too. Am I in the wrong for cutting them off? How do I tell my parents this has happened? They are coming to visit soon so I want to do this in person.

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/ThrowRA-3258 posting in relationship_advice
Inconclusive/Ongoing as per OOP
1 update - Medium
Original - 29th April 2024
Update in the same post - 30th April 2024
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My (32F) boyfriend (35M) of six years disappeared while I was out of town and I don't know what to do?
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Last Tuesday evening I (32F) came home from a being out of town for two weeks for work, my boyfriend (35M) Nate was supposed to pick me up from the airport but once I got in, I wasn't able to get ahold of him and he never showed up, I was a little annoyed but no too worried because I figured he had fallen asleep(When I talked to him earlier that morning he said he didn't sleep very well the night before and was going to lay down before he had to come get me)so I called my sister for a ride home.
When I got home Nate was no where to be found, I checked the garage an his car was gone, so I sent him a text asking where he was and headed up stairs to unpack. When I open the closet to put my things away I saw that almost all of his clothes were gone. At this point I'm confused, so I start calling him it just keeps ringing and then going to voicemail. I check his office and everything is still there, everything in the house is still there and in place except his clothes and his car. I'm really starting to freak out at this point, so I call my sister and she comes over and we both try calling and messaging him and still get no answer. his computer and his laptop are both still in his office, I logged on to his computer and my sister his laptop(I know all his passwords) but we didn't find anything out of the ordinary, so I started searching his desk and found his iPad in the top drawer, I logged into it and checked everything I could think of and found nothing out of the ordinary, my sister suggested checking the find my iPhone app on his iPad to see if we find out where his phone was. We logged into the app and see that his phone was pinging in the next state over, I starting calling him again but still got no answers to my calls or text.
I really start to lose it here, my mind starts going all over the place trying to figure out what could be going on, I called the police because I think someone has to have done something to him. The police came out but they said there wasn't much they could do because he hasn't been gone long and his clothes missing was sign the he left on his own violation.
Over the last few days I've done everything I can to contact him, He doesn't have any family except for a brother that he cut ties with before I met him, I found him online and sent him a message but he said he hasn't seen or heard from Nate in years. I keep checking his phones location and since Saturday morning it has been pinging in the same location in the PNW, I took off work for the rest of the week and my sister and I are flying up there to go to the location his phone is pinging.
Has anyone ever dealt with something like this before? How do I even confront him, what if he is with another woman, what if he isn't there or worse? I am so lost and hurt right now, my mind is all over the place, I can’t think straight, I’m so lost right now.
tl;dr my(32F) boyfriend (35M) of six years disappeared while I was out of town, haven't been able to contact him but his phone is pinging in the PNW and I am going to confront him tomorrow.
Edit: Yes I have called or messaged all of his friends, none of them have seen or heard from him, I do have access to his bank account as we have a joint account but not his business account, He last used his debt card Friday night in a town west of Seattle Washington, He owns his own business but has taken a step back over the last year so he doesn't communicate with them regularly, they haven't heard from him since last month.
I am 5 months pregnant and we have known for 3 months, he did become a bit reserved and withdrawn since we found out but its not uncommon for him to do that every so often especially around this time of year. I don't truly believe that he would abandon me and his child, that's just not the type of man he is but I don't know what to think anymore.
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Comments
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Big_fat_happy_baby
This situation is weird as fuck. Be careful out there, use common sense. If you can, get law enforcement involved in your destination, if only for your protection.
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usernaym44
OP buried the lede: she’s pregnant and bf lost or is estranged from his family. Dude is freaking the fuck out and needs therapy.
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Moal
Has he ever dealt with mental health or serious medical issues? Could he be depressed? Or in a fugue state? This is so strange, I hope you find answers soon.

OOP: Nothing like that, I know when he was young boy he had something really traumatic happen to him, he is missing a finger and has scars all down his leg and torso but he refuses to talk about it so I don't press him on it, he is a very laidback and stoic, nothing ever bothers or upsets him. However we did find out I was pregnant a couple months back and since then I have noticed he seems to be a little more withdrawn and reserved but he gets like that sometimes.

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Curiobb
Good OP. You deserve answers 100%.
Is his iPad linked to any of his messaging apps? I’m guessing not since you’ve already tried looking through it. I know I would be going absolutely crazy and that it’s easier said than done, but try to keep as calm as possible and know you will get your answers in a few short days. This is absolutely unfair, selfish, and crazy. So sorry you are going through it. There is obviously something VERY wrong if he ran away from home and is typically a caring and thoughtful kind person.
Also about the childhood trauma thing, I’m sure you asked about it upon first meeting him since the finger thing was apparent. Did he just say “I don’t like to talk about that”? I find it absolutely nuts that he has not opened up to you once about it after all this time. What has he said to your family and friends which I’m sure have asked about it if they’ve noticed his hand or seen him in a swimsuit? What’s he planning to tell his child when they will inevitably ask about it? Keeping it an angry secret doesn’t seem sustainable.

OOP: Yeah, the first time I asked him about his finger he said something happened when he was younger and he doesn't has never and will never talk about, I obviously found it odd but figured he would in time he would tell me, I've brought it up a couple times over the relationship and he always just shuts it down and the last time I brought it up was the only time he has ever raised his voice at me, so I just left it alone after that, that was a almost two years ago now. my brother in law asked him about his scars and all he said was it was from an accident he had when he was younger. He talks to me about how he is feeling all the time he is actually really good a communicating his thoughts and feelings, he talks to me about his life before he met me but only goes back to when he was around 21, he rarely mentions anything from his childhood or teens years. I know he was in some trouble with the law those years because he has a marijuana charge on his record from 2007 and when I went through the case notes he was already on probation when he got that charge but I have no idea what for, I found that out this past week as well. Obviously I am missing something but I just don't know what. I never thought he was lying to me or that he would lie to me but now I am questioning if I ever know who he is.

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Update - 8 hours later
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small update:
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first I want say thank you to everyone for suggesting the welfare check epically u/MuppetJonBonJovi We called the the department where his phone is pinging and they have sent someone over to see if they can make contact with him.. Its been over an hour and we are still waiting to hear back. I am hopeful but still have a overbearing since of dread. All I want to know right now is that he is ok and I can figure out everything else later, I just need to know he is ok.
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UPDATE:
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The police were able to do a welfare check and although they were unable to make direct contact with him they spoke to the couple who live at the house, they said they were old family friends and that he was there on Friday and Saturday but that he went to the Olympics Sunday morning to go hiking for a couple of days, The officers informed them of what was going on and they told him, they believed he was ok and that they would contact me tonight to try and help explain the situation. What does that even mean? I am even more confused, our flight to Seattle is at 9:45am tomorrow and at this point we are still going, I hope these people do call but its been awhile now and I haven't heard anything.
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NEW UPDATE:
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I think this will be my final update, I have to get ready and get my stuff packed for the flight in the morning, I have just spent the last hour speaking to the couple who house he was at and they against his wishes told me what is going on. They have known Nate since he was 12 years old, he started dating their daughter Ashley when they were in sixth grade and they counited dating all through middle school and high school. Ashley got pregnant toward the end of their senior year and they got engaged. I don't know how to even write this next part, When their son was a 1.5 years old they were involved in an accident with a drunk driver, Nate was ejected from the car and Ashley and his son passed away in the accident, She said that he blames himself for it because according to him they were never supposed to be out that night and it was his fault they were, She said he withdrew from them and everyone else and that up until last Friday that hadn't heard from him since he left. She has offered to come get my sister and I from the airport in the morning and she can try to answer any questions I have while we wait for him to return, She said they know where he is, he is at the spot they spread their ashes, she said he told her that he need be with his son one more time before he let him go... I'm honestly in a total state of shock right now, I don't know what to think but I know he is in pain and I need to get to him and I can figure everything else after.
Thank you to all the kind people who reached out and offered your suggestions, I honestly don't think I would have this information right now if it wasn't for you all, so again thank you!
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Comments
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sffood
Best I can make of this is that to become a father again, he needed to have closure with the child he had before. I have no idea how to excuse his just taking off on his pregnant girlfriend to do it, abandoning her at the airport and going no contact. That’s pretty despicable, and not something I’d forgive easily. I mean he’s put you guys through hell because he couldn’t even bother to answer his phone. And what is with taking all his clothes… Just weird.
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Sorry_I_Guess
It sounds like he may have had a bit of a breakdown. Not excusing it, but this definitely doesn't sound premeditated. More like he had a breakdown over the thought of becoming a father again, and felt he needed closure with the past that he'd just sort of abandoned up until now.
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I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments

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2. Those who are most sensitive about “politically incorrect” terminology are not the average black ghetto- dweller, Asian immigrant, abused woman or disabled person, but a minority of activists, many of whom do not even belong to any “oppressed” group but come from privileged strata of society. Political correctness has its stronghold among university professors, who have secure employment with comfortable salaries, and the majority of whom are heterosexual white males from middle- to upper-middle-class families.
   
3. Many leftists have an intense identification with the problems of groups that have an image of being weak (women), defeated (American Indians), repellent (homosexuals) or otherwise inferior. The leftists themselves feel that these groups are inferior. They would never admit to themselves that they have such feelings, but it is precisely because they do see these groups as inferior that they identify with their problems. (We do not mean to suggest that women, Indians, etc. ARE inferior; we are only making a point about leftist psychology.)
   
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5. Leftists tend to hate anything that has an image of being strong, good and successful. They hate America, they hate Western civilization, they hate white males, they hate rationality. The reasons that leftists give for hating the West, etc. clearly do not correspond with their real motives. They SAY they hate the West because it is warlike, imperialistic, sexist, ethnocentric and so forth, but where these same faults appear in socialist countries or in primitive cultures, the leftist finds excuses for them, or at best he GRUDGINGLY admits that they exist; whereas he ENTHUSIASTICALLY points out (and often greatly exaggerates) these faults where they appear in Western civilization. Thus it is clear that these faults are not the leftist’s real motive for hating America and the West. He hates America and the West because they are strong and successful.
   

TDLR Understanding the depths of my situation and coping.
I strongly believe that my husband no longer loves me and hasn't in a very long time. He shows affection at times but it's died down. If it were just physical maybe I could find solutions this but I'm also not a wizard. My main issue is infidelity, emotional abuse, and his change of behaviors and actions towards me. I had this indication about 2 years ago when he said he slept with my best friend and another female. He retracted his statement and said it didn't happen however he was sleep deprived and was his reason for admitting something so heavy.
I started to have trauma or I guess you can say I straight up lost my mind without any way to grasp onto what was happening. I started having cheating delusions. It got bad, bad like me fearing that he is sneaking someone in the room to be emotionally or physically attached. All signs of things going in a good place were destroyed. We fell off further and further I suspect because of my mental health. I wad crying everyday and I know I was hard to deal with. I was scared, I had vivid delusions that I could physically see via visual hallucinations but the worst part was the audible hallucinations. I made decisions that weren't the best for my relationship by turning him into an enemy or someone to fear because I've never ever had someone get me this way. I never knew how much you could fall for someone and how they could equally fall for you.
Fast forward to a few years later and my delusions stop due to medication and some mild therapy. There has been physical abuse in our relationship, there is trust issues, and there are court cases. I don't know how far we went off the path. I can't see a future without this marriage but I also recognize that I've made excuses and was justifying toxic behaviors. My husband made a mistake and we had to be separated for a little bit. He really seemed like he wanted this and wanted us.
That isn't the case. I'm here because he hasn't gotten to the point of finally disposing of me. He has checked out I mentioned that he has not been so honest, caring, or faithful. I have not been a stable partner and have done things out of feeling empty, scared, or alone. My level of lashing out is screaming or used to be I used to act on impulse due to the level of pain I was feeling and it didn't help.
He is at the very moment trying to break me down until I kill myself. I'm not trying to be dramatic but our recent argument resulted in him telling me after I asked him if he wanted me dead was "I'll kill you myself" and it got really really bad in my mind and my life. For the first time he told me he didn't want to be with me anymore. He also verbally said he wanted a divorce. I'd like to believe I have a strong mind or mindset but I was wrong i just thought I was getting better.
He now physically does things to harm my mental health, he's disgusted by any of my negative emotions especially my crying. I'm numb and it's harder for me to cry. If he doesn't leave me and file the papers first I think I have to go. Whether he finds a sure solution to keep me away or I basically give up this relationship and what we've gone through up. I will have failed this marriage and I will go through more confusing times. I'm not sure how to start this process as it's painful and has been weighing on my mind since a couple of months ago before we made a big move.
I never want to give up but I know now he has another outlet that isn't me. My friends and family have distanced themselves because of our fighting. I don't know how to think this through. I have unhealthy habits due to my inability to cope in a healthy way and my issues with detaching.
I am codependent. I just realize that I act in manipulative ways and I don't even mean to.
I've already written too much and he's back. Advice would be lovely but I realize this is the last days or times that I get to have and I have to figure out the consequences of this not working and and what I will ultimately face. I need to go now but if you actually read all this I'm sorry. I'm just at a loss

Hello fellow Redditors, I (44M) need your input on a recent incident involving my wife's (44F) brother (my BIL 32M). Let me provide you with some context.
Recently, my brother-in-law (BIL) completely lost his temper and verbally attacked my wife. He screamed and cursed at her, leaving her visibly shaken and unable to be in the same room as him. This isn't the first time he's displayed such behavior. He often has a bad mood and is rude not only to my wife but also to his mom and sisters. I've personally witnessed him telling my wife, "to get fucked" when she simply asked him to help out with something like taking out the trash during a large family gathering a few years ago. Needless to say, his behavior rubs me the wrong way.
After my brother-in-law yelled at my wife, her sisters and Mom went ahead with their plans to have dinner with him. However, my wife was excluded from the dinner because she didn't feel comfortable being around him and preferred not to be in the same room. She, of course, could have gone but decided not to join as she was still shaken, upset, and not comfortable.
This exclusion further bothered me because it seemed as though her family accepted the verbal abuse and carried on with dinner and drinks as if nothing had happened. Previous outburst by BIL have gone unaddressed and my wife’s family generally makes excuses for his behavior saying he is under a lot of stress, having a tough time or has been through a lot. I was still surprised and concerned by the lack of response from her family members.
I reached out to the BIL at this point because I felt it was important to address the situation.
Although I wasn't present during the incident, I was furious when I found out what happened. I felt that it was important to address the situation, so I texted him later in the evening, expressing my belief that he owes my wife an apology. However, he responded by saying that it was none of my business. I’ve been married to my wife, who is my best friend and that I love very much for ten years and have three children together - so naturally I feel invested and believe this is within the scope of my business. This escalated the situation, and I replied with a heated "F You," emphasizing that I wasn't asking for an apology but rather telling this POS that he owes my wife an apology.
The BIL’s wife had cheated on him about two years ago with many many men. It was bad. They have stuck together and apparently are working things out. My MIL and wife’s sisters had previously said openly how they don’t want anything to do with the wife given what she did and how she hurt the brother, but since everyone mostly moved on. My wife and I stayed out of it and did not take a stance one way or the other, that matter really is not our business. In the midst of our exchange, I said to him that if he doesn’t make this right, that I was going to “beat that ass like every dude in North Carolina and on his Army Base had a beating on his wife’s ass.” I wasn’t actually planning to beat him up, mostly making a point that I don’t accept his behavior and making it extra clear I’m pissed at his behavior. Prior to my comment I had expected him to say something to the effect it was a tough day and he would talk with his sister and work this out, not to tell me to kick rocks. My wife’s family is upset. Not necessarily mad at me but think I shouldn’t have taken it to that level of referring to his wife’s infidelity. I apologized to my wife for causing discomfort in the family and that I should have conducted myself a little differently but at this point after ten years of witnessing this behavior towards the women in the family I’ve come to the end of what I can tolerate. Fortunately we only have to see the BIL once a year for family holidays or events as he lives on the opposite aide of the country.
Now, I'm left wondering if I overreacted or if I was justified in standing up for my wife. Am I the asshole in this situation? I value your opinions and insights. He followed up with a few more threatening messages.
Please note that this post is open to discussion and constructive feedback. Thank you for taking the time to read and share your thoughts.

My anger is boiling I hate this dude more than anything ruined my life for what? for him to be happy with someone else
Ruined my reputation Ruined all my relationships Ruined my friendships
I despised this sad excuse with a passion How come I have to end up alone? how come life is turning out this way for Me ? how come I’m so lazy? How come I’m so ugly? How come I’m depressed ? How come I got used for all my money? Am I not worthy of loving? Am I not beautiful enough for someone to stay? Am I not just worth anything anymore? I feel alone I feel so alone I don’t like life I look at my sons sometimes and wish they had a better life A two parent home A loving home I wish I was happy enough for them They deserve a happy mom They deserve a good mom They deserve to have enough to do whatever they want in life I haven’t filed for full custody I know deep down I wouldn’t win I love them with my whole heart and body would do whatever i could to anything for them but I don’t know how to love right I don’t have enough to keep them I don’t have a proper living situation I don’t drive I don’t have an education I don’t have a job I don’t have a steady income I don’t have a support system I don’t have a healthy mind set I’m toxic I’m not a good mom Sometimes I wonder if I’m even cut out to be a mom They deserve better Someone who could take care of properly someone who could love them properly Ithey deserve everything I don’t brush his hair I don’t brush his teeth I can’t barely bathe him He isn’t eating he barely sleeps anymore I can’t cook I can’t clean I can’t make a bed I can’t do laundry I can’t clean outside I cant shower myself I get so angry I cry I get so tired My room is disgusting I can’t take out garbage I can’t do dishes Sometimes I hurt him but I don’t mean to I’ll push him by accident when I get overstimulated I hold him while he cry’s remind him I’m sorry I cry because I’m trying my best that nothing is his fault He’s happy and so is his brother They’re happy when they look at me sometimes makes feel better But they deserve better Sometimes I get so angry Sometimes I swear at him but I don’t mean to Why am I like this Why am I here How come I have these problems? How come when I look in the mirror ? I could name about 1 million reason why I’m not beautiful A big nose A round bulbous nose I have sunken in eyes My breath stinks My teeth are yellow My hair hasn’t been washed for days My hair is matted My heads really small One side of my face is slanted I look so much older than I am My teeth are crooked I have a bad side profile Sex hurts me No matter what I do it hurts I have bad posture My legs are shaped weird I have indents in my hips I have stretch marks I have scars all over my body I have self harms scars sometimes it’s just better to hurt myself than to hurt others I wish I was enough for someone to live How come I ended up abused How come the person who abused me gets to be happy How come I’m just not happy How come I’m not worth posting How come everyone I loved hurts me How come everybody has treated me shitty How come I say things I don’t mean How come I do the most stupidest things

My Gf hasn’t had a job in 10 months and she lost it all because she wanted to come spend time with me. I explained to her that I didn’t think it was a good idea for her to come and she insisted on coming anyway and lost her job and here we are. Let me express that I love her and I do enjoy our time together. We have been together for 4.5 years and I think everything has been smooth with us but the one thing that keeps coming up is her financial situation and it seems like its getting worse. When I met her she had a regular paying job and she was making a few dollars to support herself but me being the man I took on everything 100% and I was a college athlete not making that much money to support everything but I did. So As the years went on she became very comfortable with that and stopped working as hard which resulted in smaller checks like VERY SMALL. I can recall her only getting $80 because she called out so much for various reasons like monthly cycles or any excuse to spend more time with me. I always was against her putting me over her job and anything in her life so I never supported that. But as we grew in the relationship, she became more and more comfortable until she left her job after I got a better paying job making over 6 figures a year. The plan was for her to find a better paying job so we could move in together and she helps with small things around the house. I only asked her to pay for pots, pans and anything else in that order for the house while I actually pay the bills. Well she got a stay at home job and was making decent money but the problem for her was it was overnight and she constantly complained about being tired and monthly cycles was another problem she had and I am naturally a hard worker so I always pushed her to go and just get it over. She literally had to go downstairs and sit at the computer and answer calls from midnight till 7am. She went 8 months strong with the job with callouts (like 7) which wasn’t good because she didn’t even give herself a year to start calling out. I left out of town to work and I must add that mf GF doesn’t have any friends so we spend literally all our time together and its overwhelming for me because I have to pay for everything and give her all my time and if I say I am leaving out or wanting to spend time alone she will have a melt down. But back on the topic I went out of town to work and She insisted on coming to visit me because my job had an event where family members could have came and supported but the problem is she just started this job and was already on thin ice for missing days. I told her not to come and I wouldn’t hold that against her but she still came and learned that she had been let go. That was the downfall to everything because now I am responsible for her living. She lives with her mom and I never moved in with her because she never showed me she could be responsible with money. I pay for her phone bill, clothes, food and anything else that she needs and yes I make the money to support her but I never get the love in return. I never pressured her to do for me but I started to feel used because she has been looking for jobs but has been unsuccessful for almost a year. I have paid for everything 100% for years and I will also add that every time her birthday comes around I go all out for her and give her the best. When my bday comes she has no money and has to borrow or even ask me to give her money to support her with finding me a gift and thats for Vday, bday and Christmas. I have basically bought my own gifts because she never have money. This has been the tale for 4.5 years now and I want to know if im wrong for reaching my breaking point? I love and care about her and I try not to put her down but I am just tired of supporting her with nothing in return but sex and literally draining me of all my time. But I will say she is a great cook, she seems to care about me and is a fun person to be around for the most part. She wants marriage and kids but I dont see myself marrying her in these conditions. I barely want to have sex because I feel she should focus on her future and not things in that such. I have also referred her to therapy because she mentioned depression and anxiety but it has not worked also. I love her and will feel bad leaving her because I am literally all she has and she literally has no income or even $1 in her bank account and I say that humbly with intentions to disrespect her.
Someone please help me with advice. Please

My (33F) kids Dad (37) left me and our kids, 7, 5 and 4 a few months ago. He was our main income and I worked weekends because of the kids schedules. He hid from me that he had stopped paying rent and we would be evicted a few days after he left. We had been sharing his vehicle while saving to buy a second one after he totaled mine and insurance didn’t cover it. Suddenly my children and I were without a home or transportation and he moved in with his new girlfriend and her 3 kids, doing all he can to avoid paying child support.
I’m beginning to accept the fact it’s better we’re not together. He was unfaithful and blamed it on me, manipulative and selfish. His promises to change were nothing but empty words that he will one day give his new girlfriend and her family. But he didn’t have to leave the way he did. He broke our children’s hearts and left me in a really difficult situation.
My Mom and Step Dad offered to let us stay while I got back on my feet. I used my savings to buy a cheap vehicle and took the first job that I got an offer for. Step Dad and I don’t get along well. He’s a good person but we don’t have the same opinions on a lot of things. I know taking in all of us basically turned their lives and routines upside down and was a lot to handle. He doesn’t do well with change at all on top of it.
I‘ve always been a heavy sleeper and usually have a bottle of water nearby because I’m always thirsty when I wake up. One morning one of my sons woke up early before I did and accidentally spilled it on himself and some in the bed we were sharing. My parents are always up at 5:30 or 6 and must have heard he was awake and told him to come downstairs to see if he was hungry or just keep him entertained or something. I woke up to aggravated voices asking why his pants were wet, if he had an accident or if his pull up leaked while they were starting to get him changed. He was trying to tell them it was just water, didn’t have an answer for why he didn’t tell them he and the bed got wet and clearly scared to get in trouble. My Step Dad was still PISSED and is the type of person you don’t want to be around when he’s angry as an adult, much less as a young child. So he was pissed at me because I had water in the bedroom and drinks/food aren’t supposed to be upstairs, that I didn’t wake up before him and basically said I was taking the opportunity to be lazy and expected them to take care of my children. I tried to stay calm and not be defensive or make excuses but we ended up getting in an argument that led to him telling me it was best I didn’t be there anymore because I couldn’t handle the basic needs to take care of myself or my kids.
A friend that lives close by gave me a place to stay temporarily. I regret everything about that day and hate myself for letting things come to this. Living without my children is the hardest thing I’ve ever done and it’s all my fault. All of our hearts are broken. Have I really caused so much havoc in my parents lives they would rather me be gone and my children be apart from me? Thier Dad and I had a verbal agreement about the child support but has not paid much of anything after my Step Dad asked he pay them since I was no longer living there. Now they are suing us both for child support.
I’m working and saving to afford a new home for us but with however child support ends up being, I feel like I will never get ahead. I cannot believe this is my reality. Part of me feels like I’m having a pity part for myself and the other feels like I don’t deserve this.

1. XX NOTICE OF DETERMINATION NO UNEMPLOYMENT INSURANCE BENEFITS WILL BE PAID TO YOU FOR THE PERIOD BEGINNING 03/18/2024 UNTIL YOU HAVE SUBSEQUENTLY WORKED FOR AN EMPLOYER AND EARNED AT LEAST 10 TIMES YOUR WEEKLY BENEFIT RATE. EMPLOYMENT AND EARNINGS FROM NON COVERED, EXCLUDED OR SELF-EMPLOYMENT WILL NOT COUNT. YOUR WEEKLY BENEFIT RATE IS $387• DETERMINATION YOU WERE DISCHARGED FOR MISCONDUCT IN CONNECTION WITH YOUR EMPLOYMENT WITH ABOVE EMPLOYER. USE ABOR MAGES FROM THIS LLOYER BEFORE MINA/ 2O24 YOU COLLECT UNEMPABYMENT INSURANCE BENEFITS IN THE FUTURE. REASON YOU WERE DISCHARGED BECAUSE YOU WERE ABSENT ON 3/23/24. YOU HAD RECEIVED A WARNING ABOUT YOUR ATTENDANCE IN DECEMBER AND YOUR ABSENCE VIOLATED YOUR EMPLOYER'S POLICY. YOUR EXPLANATION THAT YOU WERE ABSENT BECAUSE YOU WERE TIRED IS NOT COMPELLING AS THIS WAS WITHIN YOUR CONTROL AND SHOULD NOT HAVE PREVENTED YOU FROM GOING TO WORK. YOU KNEW OR SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT YOUR ACTIONS WOULD JEOPARDIZE YOUR JOB.

My employer claimed that I just didn't show up for my shift. That day before my shift started I called to ask if I could have off because it was raining really hard and we had one more employee on the schedule than usual. I was so sure he wouldn't have a problem with it because whenever it rains he sends me home. I didn't want to do the 2 hour commute to work and back after just working only an hour. But if he said no I definitely would've showed up! All he said on the phone call was that he hated. He told me not to come in and that I wouldn’t be working there anymore. Does that not count as him firing me? I save all messages between me and my employer and never received any notice about being late. He mentioned something about me saying that I was too tired to show up to work which was weird. I've definitely mentioned being tired of my job with my coworkers but never mentioned anything about quitting because I was tired. The exact message was "Were done here. You dont have to come in tomorrow. Best of luck to you." I see that as him firing me because I would've shown up but he told me not to come in anymore I also had a question about the first part. Why is my weekly benefit rate 387 if I didn't make 10 times that. I also want to know what's the time period to make 10 times that. I definitely didn't make that much in a month but surely did my whole time working there. Is there any way to change that? Super confused about all this.

I (30M) am talking to this girl (35F) let’s just call her Dee. We’ve been talking for a 2 months now and things have gotten pretty serious. The reason why we don’t have a label or anything yet is as of a week ago we had a conversation of exclusivity and how we have been talking long enough and I wanted to make it official. She took pause with this and said this in quote.. “I don’t know why people put a label on these things”. I’m not sure why but I agreed and said yeah, we can be exclusive in our own way.
Me being a relationship type of guy, I found this weird and off. Then I asked her if she has an issue with relationships. After that question she tired to switch the subject and talk about something else. The next evening we were on the phone again and I wanted to continue our conversation from the previous night. She wasn’t any of it and she hung up on me. At this point, I’m feeling something is off.
The next day, I was hanging out with a friend I haven’t seen in a while, we’ll call him C, and I told him about our situation. I was surprised to find out that he actually knew who I was talking to the next question he asked me made me question everything. He asked C - “I didn’t know you were talking to Dee, when did she get divorced?”.
Me - “wtf are you talking about bro? She told me she was never married and that she just hasn’t found the right guy for that yet”
C - “well she fucking lied to you cause the last time I saw her was on her wedding day, my ex gf was friends with her”
Hearing all this I had to confront her on the issue, but first I wanted to do my own background check on her to see if it was true. I found her old Facebook and I saw a wedding photos and 2 kids (which I also had no idea about). So I asked her to meet for coffee and I told her everything I knew and the fact she needed didn’t tell me was a big red flag to me. She got super defensive at first and also told me that I had no idea what I was talking about. After a little bit, she calmed down and told me everything. And the worst part of it is, she legally married still cause her “husband” still pays for everything for her and if they split up, that would stop happening, and they still live in the same house. She never invited me to her place which should’ve been a red flag but I stupidly ignored that. She also told me that there is a mutual understanding between her husband and herself on dating and such, that it’s more like an open relationship. They fell out of love but she couldn’t get a job and watch the kids so her husband came up with an agreement.
You would think that this is the end of it, but I was still feeling off about everything. I asked her if she can text or call her husband so I can confirm on the agreement so I’m not stepping on anybody’s toes. She told me that’s not necessary, she came up with an excuse like he’s on a business trip or some shit and given to what happened already I really couldn’t believe that. So I left it as it is saying I need to think about things going forward. That night, I felt compelled to message her “husband”, so I found his info on Facebook and sent him an FB message. He responded fast and told me that they are still married but they used to have an open relationship a couple years ago but they soon found their way back to each other and put an end to that. The reasoning for their opening the relationship was because she was a serial cheater and he though this would be the best way to keep the household not broken and still have the mom and dad around for the kids. He started feeling off about the open relationship and he put an end to it. I was fucking shocked hearing this. I am currently an AP and I never thought I would be in this position. Btw he was home and never on a trip
Sitting at home, I thought of every single aspect of us talking and being together that seemed sketchy and how I could’ve found this out sooner. I got a call from her, and she was really laying on me, cursing me out, telling me that I ruined the agreement between them and that he was filing for divorce, cutting her off, and he told her she needed to find somewhere to live cause he was kicking her out that night. She told me that she demands that she lives with me since I had a part in ruining her life for her and her kids. I told her that if she never lied about any of this stuff, I would’ve never had to dig out more detail about it and I told her about what her husband said from her past and that serial cheating and she hung up after that.
It’s been about four days since that day and she’s calling me from different numbers and her friends having been showing up to my job and places I usually go. One of her guy friends wanted to pick a fight with my at Dunkin when I was trying to get my coffee before work. He waited until I showed up there. I didn’t entertain any of it and now I’m just stuck with all these texts, fb messages and calls from people I don’t know dragging my name through the mud around my town. Retaliation I’m thinking about posting everything up online about her serial cheating and the fake agreement she had about her husband just to clear my name. I’m not sure why people are taking their side about it, but these past four days there’s been enough harassment for me to just wanna move out of town. I tried to contact the police, and the police in my town are correct and won’t do shit about it unless anything physical happens. Even when I told them about my confrontation at Dunkin, they said I should’ve created a police report after that, which they’re probably right. Before anybody says I should’ve just fought him, I did 8 years of Karate in 2 years of mixed martial arts, I could’ve easily taken him, but I’m not a fighter, I only use it for self-defense, and he hasn’t laid a hand on me so I had no reason to use what I know.
Right now as I’m sitting down typing this, I’ve probably gotten six different calls from different numbers (fuck you google voice). And some text saying that if I don’t fix this, it’s gonna end up real bad for me. What do you think I should do? What are my next steps I could take? my friends have my back, but I had no idea this woman’s friends where that popular in town. She’s making a lies saying that her husband and her had an agreement and I ruined it for them and now she’s gonna be thrown out on the street because of it. I’m surprised her husband hasn’t been having my back, but he doesn’t really use social media much and he’s a busy guy at work so I’m not surprised everything that’s happening surprised everything that’s happening hasn’t even crossed his path yet. Or he just doesn’t wanna get involved. What’s done is done and he’s leaving it there, or maybe he just hates me for destroying his marriage which I had no idea about. AITA for all of this. I’ll update in the comments if anything happens next.
Quick Update: I just got a message back from her husband, told me that he doesn't really go on social media (fb) much since hes super busy and now he has to take care of two kids by himself since his wife is no longer living there. He went into a bit of detail about their past, mostly about the serial cheating. From what he tells me, she has cheated maybe 8 times since theyve been married, and 2 times before they got married. He told me that he was an idiot for sticking around but he loved her and he thought that maybe she would move past this phase. Which is why they opened up the relationship so she can get out of her system. It ended up making things worse so he put his foot down and then she started secretly doing it (aka my situation). He told me that she's going to get nothing in the divorce, and he's going to prove that shes an unfit mother and try to get full custody. He also said that he will make sure that they stop contacting me and there's nothing I have to worry about anymore. He apologized that it took so long for him to get back to me but he also asked if I can send him all the numbers they called from and all the messages I've received so he can use it as proof of her cheating. So i guess it all worked out. I started typing this whole situation last night. But I'm happy that it's "allegedly" going to be resolved.

for context - every time she plans to visit me something comes up and she ends up bailing. last week was food poisoning, the week before that was car trouble and this weekend she said she went to an urgent care to get a knot out in her back and they sent her to the ER because they thought it was her gallbladder. she texted me “so i’m going to the ER” completely out of the blue and I automatically thought here we go, another excuse…and then she says she’s on morphine and I just thought the entire situation was weird. for more context, I’m always skeptical about anything she says because she’s openly admitted to being a compulsive liar and we had an entire conversation about it. I confronted her about the lying and she said she would stop, but in that conversation she literally said to me “yeah honestly idk why i would just lie to you about the most random and dumbest things for no reason” … so obviously i still have trust issues years later, I think anyone would. we’ve had a long distance friendship since we met in college in 2017 and don’t live in the same state. i have terrible anxiety with driving so she always drives to stay at my house since she moved from ohio where i would take a flight to see her. it’s only about an hour-hour and a half drive from her to my house. anyways, after she randomly said she was in the ER and asked if the morphine effected her sobriety date I said anything the hospital gives you won’t effect your sobriety date, I think the whole situation is weird but I really hope you feel better. she asked me to elaborate further on why it was weird and long story short I explained how I was feeling and why I felt that way but that I always give her the benefit of the doubt etc. I never said she was lying I just explained why sometimes I have a hard time believing her and she basically ignored everything I said and told me i called her a liar. her last message to me was - “i hope you nothing but the best in life and i hope you and (husband) and (baby) have a great life but I’m so done. I told you i was in the er and the first thing you do is start saying I’m lying. Dude maybe you drive down to see me for once. But I’m done. I’m so unbelievably done with this shit” and then blocked me. we are 27 years old but she’s so immature I don’t think she’s capable of having any real conversation so she automatically took everything I said and twisted it to make me sound like a horrible person. I’m also 8 months pregnant…so the fact that she would throw it in my face that I don’t drive to see her when she knows I have terrible anxiety was insane to me. she often has tantrums like this and blocks me on everything but I don’t think I can let her back into my life if she tried talking to me again after this. honestly if roles were reversed and she voiced that she was skeptical given all the times i’ve lied to her i would be like honestly that’s valid and send her a ✌🏽 pic from the hospital lol. she is just the kind of person who automatically gets so defensive if you try and confront her about anything, and will only hear what she wants to hear. i truly don’t feel like I was in the wrong in this situation but I would like to know people’s opinions from an outside perspective

~First~
HHH/Herbert’s Hundred Harem
“But I have to...”
“It’s your lunch. You’re off the fucking clock for the next hour and a half and if I see you near a hot zone that didn’t appear under your feet then there’s going to be trouble.” The current leader who’s chosen codename is simply Eight tells Herbert and he sighs. He won’t be in the command position for at least twelve hours and until then is a field agent.
“Just get going.” Eight says and he sighs before checking his communicator. “I will shoot that thing out of your grip if that’s work.”
“I’m checking my wives schedules. A family meal sounds amazing right now.”
“It does. Get going.” Eight tells him and he nods. “I suggest a shower and a change of clothing. You smell of arson.”
“You tend to smell like the things you fight.” Herbert replies and rolls his neck. “I’ll take a shower at home. It’s not like we can hide the fact that The Undaunted are beating out wildfires that are popping up all over Centris.”
“True. Now, out.”
“I’m still going to defend myself and my family though. If someone tries anything, they’re getting shot.”
“Well, duh.” Eight replies and Herbert smirks before leaving.
“Not in the mood.” He says pointing a gun in the face of a Cloaken who was on the approach as he leaves The Dauntless. The invisible figure that is nonetheless completely obvious to him backs away. He looks up towards the sky, past the ring of vaguely visible light from the plates and into the galaxy beyond the blue sky. “Hell of a time to leave Sir, but wherever you are, I’m sure you’re causing thrice the chaos we have here. No doubt I’ll have the news of what you’re up to fall on my lap long after it’s too late to do anything about it.”
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Many, many, many lightyears away a very handsome man with a chiselled jaw and short but feathered dark hair thanks his waitress with a smile and sends the woman off in a daydream as he browses the options on his newly received menu. Well... not really. He already knows what he’s going to order and is using it as a visual block for his browsing the news. He looks like he stepped off the more... appropriate cover of a titillation magazine and then buttoned up his shirt. To say he had everyone’s attention was an understatement, but that just meant that no one was paying enough attention to see the near invisible distortion of a scanning drone slowly going around and giving everyone a surreptitious scan.
“Well then my boy, it seems you’ve found some entertainment. Good for you.” He notes to himself with a dazzling smile that the state officer that’s trying to get useful information on him finds VERY distracting. It was the fun thing about tyrannical regimes. They rarely employed true competence and as such it was very easy to subvert them.
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Herbert hums as he walks into the kitchen, freshly scrubbed, newly dressed and therefore in more business casual. He buttons up the last button on his vest and casually steps over an attempt to trip him and then does a bit of quick footwork to scoop up and launch a Purriz at the woman in question. All without even looking at her.
There’s a squeal of surprise and he laughs.
“Sorry Mirara! I’m a little on the alert side today!”
“You’re always on the alert side!” Mirara protests.
“I am especially alert today then!” He corrects himself as he heads to the fridge. “I’ve been moving hard though so I need to eat something. Can I make you anything?”
“Oh! Are you grilling?”
“Maybe, our meat stores are pretty good right?” He asks opening the ‘fridge’ it’s more a many sectioned stasis chamber. Stasis sicknesses could be lethal, but would preserve a body flawlessly. But to preserve food the only issue was if the stasis effect clung to the item in question. But it would take a toddler, or someone with the mind of a toddler to be unable to wipe it off.
“We still have a Sea-Quake tail?” He asks in surprise as he pulls out the shrunken drawer. The gigantic shrimp tail was a colourful thing before being cooked, but also dirty, grit sticks to them easily to camouflage them. But clean them off and their a rainbow of colours.
“We do! Oh my goodness yes!” Mirara exclaims and he grins.
“Alright, grab me the cooking oil and I’ll fry this beauty up. Sea-Quake steaks for the feasting.” He says and the ‘hidden’ girls on the ceiling start dropping down with exclamations of ‘steak!’ and a few of them demanding to know if their ambush was off.
“Ambush was never on to begin with girls.” Herbert replies pointing to the shining counter top and it’s rounded edge. “I saw you all when I walked in. Now who wants some sea-quake steak?”
The answer is everyone, meaning that there’s only a small portion for each of them. He makes up his own with water infused with nutrient powder. It’s mildly gritty and far from filling, but having an overly full stomach when you have to run around, sneak and fight is just asking to vomit if things start going even slightly wrong.
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“Excuse me.” He says as he grabs a Valrin woman around the waist and vanishing with her before returning and doing the same to the stunned Lutrin she had been talking to and only after he’s cleared out the area, and then another quarter second later, does the falling aircar finally crash down.
There are several sonic booms as a figure that’s nothing more than a blur opens the door to the sabotaged vehicle and extracts the survivors of the bomb going off and removes the dead body as well to lay her down near her loved ones.
The sound of the booms and crunching of metal, shattering of class and breaking of plastic all hit around the same time and the unholy cacophony assaults the senses even as Herbert finally stops moving and pants. At his small size moving at those speeds is not recommended. It’s not about energy or friction, Axiom takes care of that. But whenever he’s fully phased in he’s so small that the resistance of the relatively still air pushes down on his chest and stomach like being trapped in a vice grip.
Needing to move fast is one thing, needing to do it while barely able to breathe is another. He needs more inflexible armour on his front. Or armour that can harden to stop things from pressing down on his chest or stomach.
“Alright, all of you get under... right, Slohbs can’t move without the muck. Sorry.” He begins to say as he picks up the clearly traumatized and horrified Slohb that’s producing lime green slime from the core he rescued. He gives her enough time to get a thin layer at least and picks her up. “Make one bump if you want somewhere dry, two if you want something wet.”
Two bumps rise up as he leads the living further away from where the aircars are zipping around. A nearby restaurant has people cowering in it and he requests a pitcher of water and then uses it to help hydrate the Slohb woman a bit before placing her down on a table when she has enough slime to make a tendril that reaches into the pitcher to let her drink at her own pace.
She drains it dry in five seconds and he gets her a refill before opening up a wrapped nutrition brick that she grabs from him and absorbs to start producing more and thicker slime that quickly starts to take the form of a small child.
“Well, that was the scariest thing that ever happened to me.” The Slohb states and Herbert shrugs.
“I suppose. Now if you’ll excuse me miss, I need to get moving.” Herbert says. “All of Centris has gone mad and there’s this kind of silliness all over the place.”
“Silliness!?”
“I just tore your vital organs out of your body and you’re getting better after a drink and a snack. That’s freaking weird.” Herbert says in his, ‘Oh gosh the galaxy is so weird!’ routine to engage people and get them thinking again and past any sense of shock.
“Anyways, gotta go! You girls be safe now!” He says before rushing off and after another hotzone.
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“You stupid cops just don’t know when to stop!” The woman screams as she hurls the car straight at them. Something impacts it from the side and it crunches into a space the size of a marble while venting raw energy out the top or bottom before detonating in a shower of thin, tiny effects.
“Love this thing.” A broad shouldered man riding a warform Takra-Takra says as he slots another round into his strange gun.
“But miss lady here won’t love what comes next for that stunt.” A tiny voice says from behind her and she turns to look and only gets a glimpse of an itty-bitty little figure of a boy that she somehow hadn’t sensed balancing on the ridge of her tail.
Then the Jorgua is knocked right the hell out and the local police busy themselves and arresting her despite the cells already being cartoonishly full.
“Today just isn’t going to end anytime soon is it?” Chenk asks and Herbert shakes his head before tossing him further ammunition for his Caster Gun.
“No, no it’s not. Best of luck I...” His communicator goes off again and he looks at it. “Hunh... That’s a self sorting problem.”
“What is?”
“Some idiot is in the middle of the former council building and is threatening to blow herself up if they go through their plans to demolish it. With explosives.” Herbert says.
“Legally she has to be stopped.”
“But it’s really tempting not to.” Herbert says before taking a breath. “Alright, I’m off.”
“I’d tell you to kick ass, but there’s just so many right now.” Chenk says in a dramatic tone.
“I KNOW right?” Herbert asks before teleporting away.
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Everything was falling but nothing was landing. Something had happened to the stabilizers and there was sabotage in the plate. They were falling and not only would the vast majority of the residents die, but the sheer damage it would cause to the nearby spires would...
The world SHIFTS as SOMETHING grabs onto the Axiom and makes it OBEY. Gravity is back, everyone hits the ground and not even the most delicate of glass structures are so much as scuffed. SOMETHING is here, SOMETHING is not amused and whatever that SOMETHING is. It’s just saved billions of lives.
Reality twists and suddenly a gigantic Nagasha is there, a royal hood flaring out and a stern outfit covers her up. It’s nothing less than The Trytite Lady and under her immense will the entire Plate floats back into position. A few moments later a tiny human appears next to her.
“Backups restored ma’am, main engines are coming online and the damage is contained. Thank you for the assistance.” The adorable little man says and she nods. Then reality itself warps in front of her and she slithers through to return order to this chaotic world.
“Damn, they really are the big girls on campus.” Herbert notes to himself before looking to his audience. “And... yeah you just literally found god. God damn.”
Then he’s gone as well as she’s just left staring there.
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The problem with breaks, is that if you’re in the flow it breaks just that. And when they’re mandated for mental health purposes you don’t get to just ignore them. Even though being forced to sit still while everything was still going completely berserk around you was exactly the kind of thing to drive people insane.
The system still needed work and was erring on the side of doing everything it could to stop The Undaunted from going mad. Which while a nice thing to do, was not the kind of thing needed in the middle of a planetary scale borderline rebellion.
So he’s trying to centre himself a little more and is sitting on top of The Dauntless and takes a few deep breaths before leaning to the side and then flipping off whoever sent that at him even as it deflects off the hull.
The next four seconds are very fast and while his forward charge is ill advised it’s just a distraction as it’s an illusion as he approaches from the side while the opposing force tries to get a bead on him.
“Hello stupid.” He says as he grabs their gun and drop kicks the woman in the face before turning around and breaking the weapon against them as he baseball swings it to slam her into the far wall.
“Fun.” He notes as she charges with a large trytite knife.
~First~ Last

In 10th grade I became friends with one of the most sensitive, wise and beautiful souls I've ever come across. We had art sessions that built confidence in our talent and skills, we bonded over music and had the most sincere and supportive conversations up until the final falling out that ended our friendship abruptly.
To preface I've struggled with mental health since 5th grade and only found out in 12th grade that I was bipolar (just for context and of course does not excuse my actions in any means). After many variations of antidepressants which were aggravating my disorder alongside smoking weed in absurdly copious amounts. Even when I was prescribed the best medication for my situation, my mood was far from stabalised and it worsened my highs and lows tremendously.
In 2022 some petty friend group drama happened and I blew it out of proportion. I freaked out and was fully selfish from my side. I played victim, not realising what collateral my emotional explosion would create and just went off in horrible and insensitive ways. That was objectively what the situation was.
That rightfully ended our otherwise beautiful and healthy friendship since I took it for granted in many ways at that point in time. After cooling down and getting my head on straight I felt so shameful and pained that I was even able to do/say such things and was able to black out in my emotion like that. I stopped trusting myself. Trusting myself as person at my core or as a worthy friend for anyone as amazing and pure as him.
After working through this for years and by making other mistakes, I've taken every small/big incident and saw it as a lesson to self reflect on and became very self-aware of figuring out what the core of my problems are instead of treating the unsavoury symptoms and consequences.
My biggest regret is that I lost a lovely person and hurt him immensely. I'm saddened that I basically threw away the opportunity to see how he grows in his journey where I know he'd rise to any occasion when facing life's challenges in the most graceful ways.
I just miss him so much and a bit sad that I became the person I believe he deserved back then way too late. He deserved so much more than what I did to him. he deserved the version I am now. I had enough strenght to leave problematic habits (not having smoked in 255 day 9 months), having loved people, having lost family and having found the confidence in myself I never thought I could ever have. Confidence that allowed me to hold my head high despite my imperfections and mistakes and that allowed me to become the person I've always wanted to be. I'm working everyday to be the best version of myself and I guess I just wish the friend I had could see me now. I know he would be proud.
I miss you 🅱️Ivan, hope you are flourishing x