Stay with me and read on if you want a reason not to hate the whole Viv Grant relationship plot line. For those most ardent opposition this won’t be enough to sway you and that’s fine.
After half a dozen or more reads/listens I keyed into one word from the post coital scene between Grant and Viv as the starting point to this perspective. Viv was really first attracted to grants “Intensity” setting aside of course purely physical attributes. It was intensity that he showed her in the counter beatdown. That intensity that she gravitated to that became the feelings.
Why is intensity so important to Vivs character? Well she got a childlike intensity from Rei and his dream, and I’m not going to rehash the ‘losing Rei as her pet project’ theme to this debate. Rather her adopting Reis intensity toward combat and devices is the guiding light for her in those formative years.
Viv, remember, comes from a life of extreme privilege. Rich, Caucasian, pretty, talented in fighting, popular, and smart. Nothing in her life through Grandcrest really challenged her. It all came so easy to her.
The first time she has any real adversity, feeling left behind by Firesong, she mentally folds like a cheap suit. She’s despondent and jealous and doubting everything she aligned her life to for the past 4.5 years. She has no direction hope or resolve to rise above this challenge. She is exactly what Cashe described as “people who think they deserve something their whole lives don’t deal well with not getting it” (paraphrased).
It’s Logan’s intensity, his drive to excel and all his reasons for doing so makes Viv better. She didn’t get that from Rei in any way that could sustain her progress anymore, maybe because she couldn’t handle following that light from behind, having always been blazing the trail where he pointed that light.
I suggest that Viv couldnt have taken the steps necessary to realize her potential without grants intensity being in her life so deeply, not just on the same squad but all the ways he ‘impressed’ upon her the reinforcing and supportive statements in that scene in the hotel room.
The detractors say Viv betrayed Rei, and that’s natural because Rei is the MC and we imprint ourselves on MCs and feel betrayal so acutely as humans. But if we consider Viv as a fully realized character and not just as her part in Reis story, she was flawed years before she met Grant, she was never challenged and rose above it. The slowly built relationship with Grant isn’t her flaw it’s the fix to the flawed character she already was.
It’s important that I be clear. Grant is NOT her new ‘broken baby bird’ he is not her new ‘guiding light’ he showed her the intensity that she will need to realize her potential. He showed her through his tragedy that her privilege and easy success is not normal and not sustainable. Lennon observed this flaw through her combat style assessment ‘as soon as you’re not the fastest on the field you’re going to lose and lose hard’. This is telegraphed from that far back and earlier.
So in closing consider Viv as her own character, absent Rei, and see that she needed someone to get her oriented to harsher realities. And tell me who better than Grant to do it?

Hi! Sorry - I have access to a shoddy answer key with half of the answers wiped out. I really need someone to check my understanding of certain questions... so greatly appreciated, thank you all so so so much
22) ** pregnancy risk factors are a tough one for me. Since it's di di, i ruled out twin/twin transfusion and umbilical cord entanglement. Was stuck between B and E. B seemed like the obvious one since it's a multiple pregnancy, but uterine rupture has a RF of previous c-section.. I guess i'm just confused how to make these choices? :/
A 42-year-old woman, gravida 2, para 1, at 12 weeks' gestation comes to the physician for her first prenatal visit. She conceived a dichorionic-diamniotic twin gestation after in vitro fertilization. She has no history of serious illness, and her only medication is a prenatal vitamin. Two years ago, her first pregnancy ended in cesarean delivery at 39 weeks' gestation because of breech presentation. She is 165 cm (5 ft 5 in) tall. She weighed 68 kg (150 lb) prior to her pregnancy; BMI was 25 kg/m2. She has had a 2-kg (4-b) weight gain during her pregnancy. Her blood pressure is 110/70 mm Hg. Examination shows a uterus consistent in size with a 12-week gestation. This patient is at greatest risk for which of the following pregnancy complications?
A) Fetal aneuploidy B) Preterm labor C) Twin-twin transfusion syndrome D) Umbilical cord entanglement E) Uterine rupture F) Vanishing twin syndrome
31) ** I guess I still have a lot of issues w acid base problems.. I tried approaching it from a dirty medicine way with comparing values 7.25 = 20/51 to 7.4 = 24/40. So HCO3 went down and CO2 went up, which aligns with an acidotic picture... I guess my issue here, was that I saw that there was more change in respiratory (51 and 40), so I assumed that was the primary defect -> respiratory acidosis. It should have been a clue to me that because decreases in metabolic HCO3 wouldn't cause an alkalosis but I didn't catch it. In this case, I'm really not sure how to start evaluating acid-base problems with a mixed picture - do I take it as that if both are "appropiate" compensations, it would be mixed? Would pure respiratory acidosis have a completely normal HCO3 w no movement whatsoever? Would really appreciate some insight here! A 27-year-old man with asthma comes to the emergency department because of progressive shortness of breath and wheezing for 24 hours. His symptoms began 1 week ago with increasing wheezing. Treatment with inhaled ß-adrenergic agonists and corticosteroids has been ineffective. He appears mildly dehydrated and in moderate to severe respiratory distress with labored breathing and use of accessory muscles. His pulse is 90/min, respirations are 30/min, and blood pressure is 130/80 mm Hg. Arterial blood gas analysis on room air shows:
pH 7.25 PCO2 51 mm Hg P02 65 mm Hg HCO3: 20 mEq/L
Which of the following is the most likely cause of these findings?
A) Metabolic acidosis with a compensatory respiratory alkalosis B) Metabolic alkalosis with a compensatory respiratory acidosis C) Mixed respiratory and metabolic acidosis D) Pure respiratory acidosis E) Respiratory acidosis with a compensatory metabolic alkalosis
38)** seems like the right answer is B, post-coital abx in a healthy patient. However, what gives me pause is the "urethral elevation" is that a normal finding and result of UTI? Or would we need to do cystoscopy to rule out an anatomical issue?? A 24-year-old nulligravid woman comes to the physician because of a 3-day history of pain with urination and urinary frequency. She has a 1-year history of frequent bladder infections characterized by similar symptoms. The infections occur after sexual intercourse and resolve with antibiotic therapy. She has no other history of serious illness and takes no medications. She is currently sexually active with one male partner, and they use condoms consistently. Examination shows bladder tenderness and urethral elevation; no other abnormalities are noted. Urine culture grows Escherichia coli. Which of the following is most likely to prevent recurrence of these symptoms?
A) Obtain a swab of the urethra of the patient's partner B) Prescribe an antibiotic to be taken following sexual intercourse C) Perform cystoscopy to rule out detrusor instability D) Perform cystoscopy to rule out anatomic cause E) Recommend weekly self-catheterization to determine postvoid residual volume

There are lots of variations on this theme, but the basic idea is the same.
Sexual excitement, roughly speaking, consists of physical plus psychological stimulation—“friction plus fantasy,” if you will.
Reduce the physical sensation, and you’ve removed half the problem. Now it’s much easier to stay below what’s called your orgasm threshold.
The classic way to last longer by reducing sensation is to use a condom. Other popular methods involve numbing the penis with local anesthetics: sprays, wipes, creams, etc.
These all work by the principle of Arousal Recuction (AR), as we discussed above. Who else but a man with premature ejaculation would ever try to have less exciting sex?
One interesting variation on this theme, which I’d still classify as AR, is what’s called “coital alignment technique.” Here’s how it’s done:
Place your penis as deep inside her vagina as you can. Only the outermost part of her vagina has muscles capable of gripping your penis tightly. If you keep your penis deep inside her, the sensitive head of your penis stays far away from the tighter outermost part of her vagina.
If you press your pelvis firmly up against hers, she can now grind against your body to stimulate her own clitoris. Lots of good clitoral stimulation for her, but your penis remains near-motionless inside her, minimizing physical stimulation for you.
Condoms, creams, sprays, wipes, and coital alignment all have in common that they seek to minimize physical sensation. Let’s look at the pros and cons of trying to last longer in bed by such means:
Pros:

• Condoms also help prevent STIs.

Cons:

• Creams, sprays, and wipes aren’t most couples’ romantic ideals.
• All these techniques rely on Arousal Reduction (AR).

(There is a TL;DR at the bottom. Sorry, brevity is not my strong suit when tired)
Thanks for reading. My wife (50, LLF) and I (49, HLM) have been having issues for a while. Some of them are medical issues, some relationship issues, some issues are related to my wife having fibromyalgia, musculoskeletal issues, depression, anxiety, and a feeling that she has completely given her entire life and identity away for our marriage and being a parent to our 9 year old.
Yes, it’s a lot. Early in our relationship we had a healthy sex life. She was an artist, I was a composer. We gave each other a lot of space to be creative and live our own lives while being together. We were both in martial arts and traveled when we could. Things felt pretty good. We were poor, but were both working. She did not feel fulfilled in her job so I started earning more to try to give a buffer for her to get more time in the studio. I figured that time and money were what she needed. Well, I was wrong. She did the lion’s share of house duties and finances, feeling like she had been tacitly assigned those roles. That hurt our feelings of closeness somewhat. I tried to step up but it was hard because I was working 8am to 10pm. My math of happiness was off.
We kept working things out though. Then she started having issues with her pelvic floor, which was the first major blow to our sex life. But we were 39, and we both decided that we wanted to be parents.
After our daughter was born, sex stopped for maybe 6 months or so. Hard to remember. Understandable because early parenting life is hard.
Years later, our daughter was still sleeping in our bed. This pretty much killed any chance for sex. My wife also started getting very bad back pain. That was an additional hardship. Sex dwindled to maybe once every couple months…. We tried to use my extra room to have sex but it is rather small. The back trouble was something to be careful about.
I got an amazing corporate job to help pay the bills in 2017. This was after we had to declare bankruptcy. It was a hell of a year. My hours jumped back up and my wife was borderline alcoholic. She stopped that though and we continued. She felt completely destroyed by becoming nothing but a housewife and mother but tried to hide it. I was gone all day
Then came 2020. It started off pretty good. She got a back ablation, and that helped a ton. When a pandemic safe day camp came up for our kid, we had her go there and went at it for a week straight. Apparently this was due to some kind of THC edible my wife was having. It was glorious.
After that week, sex stopped for 2 years.
She started getting wild burning in her hip. To the point where she had trouble walking.some days the pain was so bad that she couldn’t get out of bed. She got medication to help, but the feeling of being invalid on top of everything just destroyed her. I was around though, so I could do the chores, take the kid to school, attend family events… we stopped talking about sex because I didn’t want her to feel guilt or shame. I brought it up every once in a while just to try to open up conversations about sexuality within the confines of her newly diagnosed fibro. She started getting angry when I talked about sex. I get it. She felt like everything was her fault. I do not initiate sex or ask about it or bring it up. We saw a couples counselor but wife quit because she felt attacked. The pain alters her personality pretty extremely. I often feel guilt and shame for her condition. For the fact that she feels unfulfilled.
Recently, much to my amazement, we had sex.i think my stepping up around the house and trying hard to give her what she needs to feel seen again helped her feel safe enough. She said she felt no pain.
A week later she pulled sex completely off the table. As far as she is concerned at the moment, sex is over. She is tremendously frustrated that she is the only one who can provide me with physical intimacy. She feels like her role as a wife is to give the sex I need and crave out of obligation. Like she has been relegated to a sex slave or something. It made me really sad because sex used to be friends n and consensual, a place we both loved, and now things are extremely complicated. She loves all of the extra work I am putting in and how much I have worked on active listening and being there for the family. She just doesn’t feel like having sex most of the time and wants to manage my expectations by pulling it off the table.
She suggested getting an escort. Finding someone else for sex. It feels weird. Like I just need to go stick my dick in something and I’ll be fine.
I miss the light, loving physical intimacy. I have never felt so good with a lover. I am not getting any indication that she wants to try to work within her conditions to open that side of our relationship again.
That said, we went to lunch today and she said “we should touch more”
I have a very high libido. I’ve been taking care of myself but I miss feeling desired. I feel selfish. I want to lay naked in bed and forget the world with someone for an hour of post-coital conversation, laughing, dreaming.
Could I have the physical with another and everything else with my wife? I don’t know how to navigate that emotionally or logistically. I feel lost. I also don’t know if sex is truly removed, or if she just never wants to think about it unless the stars align and we have open time like that.
I have whiplash from the sex we had weeks ago. It was like it used to be. Hot, fun, light, delicious.
I know she likely feels like ‘oh shit! Now I have shown Him that I can have sex!!’ And is feeling pressure. I wish we could go to therapy. I am trying to find a therapist for myself.
Anyone here have an open marriage after this kind of thing? Can you navigate it? Do you just delete your sexuality or find better toys?
Do you have any suggestions?
Thanks for reading if you have made it through this tome. I’m lost and sleepless and an emotional wreck. Take care.
TL;DR - I forgot that I already created an intro on this sub. D’oh. So the short version is, we had sex recently, it went really well, then she pulled sex off the table completely, and feels too much pressure being the only one that can satisfy my physical intimacy needs. Escort? FWB? I have no idea how to do this emotionally or logistically. Ever tried it? Is it insane to contemplate? Ack.

I have finished a re-read of the Finnish Kalevala, and decided to write down some thoughts on Kalevala's influence on Tolkien, together with thoughts on some of the available translations. The result wound up as monstrously long (Kalevala Comments: Tolkien Influences and the Translations), so I thought I would content myself with reposting the section on Túrin Turambar, and how he relates to the Kalevala character of Kullervo. It is pretty common knowledge in the fandom that the two characters line up pretty well, but I also thought it interesting to note the ways in which they differ - and more importantly, why they differ...
(v) Kullervo as Túrin Turambar
Now we turn to the epicentre of Kalevala influence on a mature Tolkien story: the connection between Kullervo and Tolkien’s Túrin Turambar. In a sense, Tolkien fills out three of the four major Kalevala protagonists with his own legendarium characters. Ilmarinen the smith influences Fëanor, Väinämöinen the sage influences Gandalf, and and now we have Kullervo the hapless informing the ultimate fate of Túrin son of Húrin. Only a Lemminkäinen analogy is missing to complete the quartet, though the idea of Tolkien putting a lecherous, charismatic playboy into his world would no doubt raise some eyebrows. Maybe the fanfiction can be seen as filling that particular niche.
Anyway, as noted earlier, Kullervo garnered sufficient interest from the young Tolkien that the tale sparked his own fanfiction efforts. Even into the actual Túrin tale, as it appears in the published Silmarillion, the shadow of the Kalevala is long indeed:

• Kullervo and Túrin both lose connection with their biological family early in life, and grow up in a fostered setting – albeit Kullervo is a slave, and Túrin is pampered.
• Kullervo and Túrin are both moody, angry young men with a tendency to over-react to slights. Kullervo arranges for Ilmarinen’s wife to be torn apart by bears. Túrin throws a goblet in Saeros’ face, then later strips him naked and chases him through the forest at sword-point.
• On killing their immediate tormentors (Ilmarinen’s wife and Saeros), both Kullervo and Túrin flee the perceived wrath of a Reasonable Authority Figure (Ilmarinen and Thingol of Doriath).
• Kullervo and Túrin are both innately talented individuals, skilled at magic and fighting respectively. It is just that everything they do seems to end badly for them.
• Kullervo and Túrin both wreak bloody vengeance (against Untamo and Brodda’s Easterlings respectively).
• Kullervo and Túrin both run across their sister unknowingly. The sister had wandered away from their mother, and basically gone missing.
• Kullervo and Túrin both commit incest with aforementioned sister.
• Aforementioned sister discovers the incest and immediately drowns herself in a river.
• When the weight of their sins grows too much for them, Kullervo and Túrin pull out their creepy black swords, and have a chat with them. The swords talks back, and are perfectly fine with killing their owners.
• Kullervo and Túrin force their sword-hilts into the ground, and then both characters commit suicide by impaling themselves upon the blades.
• Túrin is buried under the Stone of the Hapless. Kullervo is referred to as “the hapless hero” in the Kirby translation, and then later as “Kullervo the hapless” by Tolkien himself in Letter 163.
  Quite the list of parallels. But even here, there needs to be qualifications, which I might list as follows:
  
• Tolkien’s Túrin is an altogether grander figure than Kullervo. He is the heir to a powerful lord of men, and a celebrated warrior whose martial abilities are remembered for millennia afterwards. He wins the esteem of not one but two Elven kingdoms. Kullervo, by contrast, is a backwoods bumpkin, whose misfit status aligns with prodigious magical talent to cause disaster. In fact, Kullervo’s early life in slavery is arguably a better fit for Túrin’s cousin, Tuor, than for Túrin himself.
  
• Appearance-wise, Túrin is handsome, earning the name Adanedhel and the attention of Finduilas in Nargothrond. Kullervo’s appearance is unclear – he’s described as handsome in Runo XXXV, but in Runo XXXVI his brother says he would prefer another brother, one more handsome. Kullervo is also terrible with women, to the point where he only gets sex with his unknown sister after he forces her into his sled and reveals his collected tax money. In Tolkien’s own fanfiction, Kullervo is explicitly described as ugly and unattractive to women.
  
• Not only is Túrin grander, but the root of his calamities is accordingly more mythic. Túrin’s family has been cursed by a literal Dark Lord, and the character devotes much effort to escaping the supposed curse. Kullervo, by contrast, is considered to be the product of bad parenting.
  
• Túrin is given a series of opportunities by friendly voices, most notably Beleg, to back away from his destructive path. Túrin has several genuine friends over his lifetime. Kullervo, by contrast, is a friendless pariah, who finds himself disowned by his entire family, save his mother. The effect is that the role of personal choice and culpability in Túrin’s story is emphasised, in a way it is not in Kullervo’s. Túrin is far less evil on paper, but he also has more control over his own predicament, which allows for a greater sense of tragedy. Kullervo’s tragedy is that (via upbringing and mental illness) he never really learned how to act as a functional human-being within society.
  
• The incest takes place under very different circumstances. Túrin finds Nienor in the forest, rescues her, gets to know her… so they marry, and she gets pregnant. Kullervo abducts a random woman on his journey, in the name of casual sex under dubious consent.
  
• There is no analogy to Glaurung in Kullervo’s story. Not only does the slaying of Glaurung make Túrin a bona fide hero, but the dragon’s memory-wiping allows for the incest plot to take place at all. Kullervo’s situation would be more analogous to a situation where Túrin goes straight from Doriath to Brethil, forces himself upon a random woman, and only finds out who she is during the post-coital chat.
  
• Túrin’s response to learning of the incest is to go into denial, then snap and kill himself. Kullervo – unlike his sister – does not commit suicide immediately on learning the truth. The suicide comes in the following Runo, when the guilt finally gets to him.
  
• The talking sword is much more unremarkable in Kalevala than it is in Tolkien. The world of Kalevala is dripping in animism. One can talk to roads, trees, and celestial objects, and they can talk back. Small wonder that a sword can. In Tolkien, Gurthang is another matter, allowing for a much stranger and creepier scene. There is the logic hole of how the narrator was aware of Gurthang’s speech, given Túrin was the only person to have heard it… but it is still a delightful artistic flourish.
  

From this, one can ascertain that Tolkien had to perform a fair amount of surgery on Kullervo in order to turn him into Túrin Turambar. Once again, I feel that Kalevala ought to be seen as a foundation ingredient to Tolkien’s legendarium, rather than as something that enables us to say that Túrin son of Húrin “is” Kullervo, or even that Kullervo defines Túrin. In my earlier discussion of suicide in Tolkien, I also noted that Tolkien the writer was turning this particular story into the grandest tragedy he could concoct, even if it meant throwing ethics or metaphysics to the wind. In the present discussion I thought I would elaborate on that process of building a grand tragedy.
I would summarise Tolkien’s literary method here as follows:

• Start with the bare bones: Kullervo, as he appears in Runos XXXI-XXXVI of Kalevala.
• As per Aristotle’s Poetics, tragedy portrays Men as better than they are, in order that we might feel the magnitude of their Fall. Rather than a backwoods bumpkin, Túrin ought to be something grander. Eliminate the ugly cow-herder, and replace him with the famed Black Sword of Nargothrond, a handsome and esteemed warrior. Eliminate the mere background of mistreatment, and replace it with a powerful Dark Lord’s curse. Cue a thematic exploration of Free Will and Fate. And eliminate Kullervo’s toxic attitude towards women, in favour of something more sympathetic (or at least tolerable).
• Inject elements from classical Greek tragedy. Rather than starting out a slave, Túrin starts high – he attains the high favour of Thingol of Doriath, before squandering his position through poor choices. Indeed, Túrin has plenty of opportunity to make poor choices, with other characters trying to talk sense into him. Túrin has a clear tragic flaw here, and in accordance with tragic conventions, his efforts to flee from his fate only bring him closer to it. He is not simply lashing out at the world like Kullervo.
• Following on from the above, the tragic trope of Dramatic Irony is in full effect. The reader of Tolkien knows who Túrin’s wife is before he does – with all the associated dread – whereas the reader of Kalevala merely finds out with Kullervo himself. It is the famous distinction between Suspense and Surprise.
• Raise the stakes. Kullervo’s sister drowns herself after a single night with her brother. Túrin’s sister is married and pregnant, so her suicide is even more horrifying.
• The dragon allows the introduction of Dramatic Irony, via Glaurung’s mind-wipe on Nienor. It also shifts Túrin away from Finnish material, and into Norse and Germanic material. Sigurd the Dragonslayer is now the other great influence on Túrin. The central character is thus allowed to achieve a great and unparalleled feat before his doom catches up with him.
• Túrin’s suicide follows Dramatic Irony out of Sophocles’ Oedipus Rex – extensive denial, followed by terrible realisation. Knowledge of the incest itself is enough to drive Túrin to these tragic steps, whereas Kullervo delays his suicide significantly.

In essence, Tolkien adapts Kullervo’s story, and bolsters its tragic elements by importing influences from outside Kalevala, specifically the Greek (Oedipus Rex) and the Norse (Völsunga saga). It is a solid artistic choice, and one that speaks positively of Tolkien’s instincts as a writer. Túrin might no longer be the Kullervo of Kalevala, but he is an artificial Kullervo, imbued with sympathetic grandeur, and alloyed with other metals to strengthen him for the purpose of The Silmarillion. I wonder if Ilmarinen the smith would approve.

I get conceptually as a giving pleasure thing it can be useful like giving oral doesn’t lead to orgasm or stimulate erogenous zones but the giving part can be nice in the pleasure exchange. So it’s like someone using their hole between legs as a sleeve to stimulate a penis. But just allowing someone to penetrate it is a bit of a weird concept I don’t understand it. I get penetrating someone when they have a prostate. Like that actually leads to stronger orgasms for the person receiving. Majority with a vulva cannot orgasm from intercourse and vagina itself has little sensitivity which is a good thing due to it having the capability of stretching for childbirth. I understand fingering kind of but the emphasis would not be going deep it’s just stimulating the clitoris from the inside more in a curved finger motion though the clitoris is on the outside mostly with greatest sensitivity. It would be like stimulating testicles. You can curve into the vaginal hole but it seems unnecessary to stick a penis especially without the coital alignment technique.

Instead of picking one position and pounding away like a jackrabbit, try alternating between a few different configurations to last longer during sex. Switching positions provides a little bit of “time off” when your penis is not being stimulated.
You can also try out some more elaborate sex positions that require physical stamina. With these “wilder” more physically strenuous sex positions, you’ll be more focused on technique and balance so you won’t be able to focus on the physical stimulations as much.
In a similar vein, you want to skip positions that provide too much stimulation. Positions like doggy style or flatiron, where you can go super-duper deep and get all the extra stimulation from your partner’s booty, are probably good to skip.
Instead, try positions that only allow for shallower penetration, or that don't allow for much "in and out" movement. The CAT (Coital Alignment Technique) is ideal if you're looking for something shallow. (Plus, if your partner has a clitoris, it's great for their pleasure!) Then there's the Lotus position, which is all about grinding against each other as opposed to hardcore thrusting.
Any man can pump like a jack rabbit and achieve his orgasm quickly, but to truly savor every moment of being inside ofher pussy you must learn to stay ahead of your climax
Enjoy!

Instead of picking one position and pounding away like a jackrabbit, try alternating between a few different configurations to last longer during sex. Switching positions provides a little bit of “time off” when your penis is not being stimulated.
You can also try out some more elaborate sex positions that require physical stamina. With these “wilder” more physically strenuous sex positions, you’ll be more focused on technique and balance so you won’t be able to focus on the physical stimulations as much.
In a similar vein, you want to skip positions that provide too much stimulation. Positions like doggy style or flatiron, where you can go super-duper deep and get all the extra stimulation from your partner’s booty, are probably good to skip.
Instead, try positions that only allow for shallower penetration, or that don't allow for much "in and out" movement. The CAT (Coital Alignment Technique) is ideal if you're looking for something shallow. (Plus, if your partner has a clitoris, it's great for their pleasure!) Then there's the Lotus position, which is all about grinding against each other as opposed to hardcore thrusting.
Any man can pump like a jack rabbit and achieve his orgasm quickly, but to truly savor every moment of being inside her pussy you must learn to stay ahead of your climax
Enjoy!

I think we have all been duped by it at least once by now: Terrible, shallow-researched dribble that gets posted to Wall Street Bets as “Due Diligence” which, in reality, is nothing more than one lunatic’s confirmation bias in long form and projected outward.
Let me take one of these tickers, break down examples of positive things you might hear about it, and explain why they are bullshit.

The Company

CLNE is a meme stock representing a company, Clean Energy, that is attempting to straddle the line between the fading trend of natural fuels and the EV future of the industry.

The Nonsense

I have chosen three examples of allegedly bullish signals I have seen posted for CLNE specifically: price targets, partnerships, and options chains.
I feel that these together well cover the types of evidence you might see posted as “DD”.

Price Targets

The first signal to be addressed happens to be the most meaningless. To be blunt, there is a reason they call them “analists”: most of what they write is pulled right out of someone’s ass. Sometimes this is their own ass, and other times it is someone else’s. Not everything has to have an agenda; sometimes you just have a writing deadline.
Bottom line is that some random desk jockey writing that CLNE will be worth somewhere in the mid to high teens does not mean it will ever get there. After all, stocks trade based on a company’s current value which means the price is not going to reach ten times what a company might be worth at the end of the century nor will a stock price stay uplifted while a company does nothing but lose money. Just look at green energy-adjacent tickers like TSLA or NKLA as good examples of how stock prices tend to reflect an objective valuation of a company.

Partnerships

Sometimes all it takes to hype a stock is having a partnership with a bigger company announced, or even just having rumors of one coming. In CLNE’s case, the partnership is confirmed and it’s with the biggest of the big, Amazon! This is huge! Who doesn’t love Amazon?
…but that is actually a problem. Everyone loves Amazon, and Amazon knows it. While having signed a deal with one of the biggest companies on the planet sounds great in a vacuum, talking it up is akin to bragging about getting knocked up by a celebrity while conveniently ignoring the pre-coital contract you signed that specifies that the father does not have to have anything to do with you unless the kid turns out to be somehow profitable. Meanwhile, Amazon gets to run around creating more legally deniable baby mamas since, unless CLNE found some leverage to convince the retail behemoth to sign with exclusivity, it is in their best interest to plant as many seeds as they can and only execute on the deals that end up being worth the most.
Let’s look at the CLNE/Amazon deal specifically. Amazon gets bunch of CLNE warrants for something like $13/share with the chance to get more if they buy $500 million worth of fuel from CLNE. The common pro-CLNE read of this situation is that obviously Amazon believes that CLNE will be worth at least $13/share in the not-so-distant future, right?
Wrong.
This deal gives Amazon two pretty clear escape hatches:

• Amazon can just choose not to exercise the warrants.
  
• Amazon can just not buy the fuel.
  

The entire burden is on CLNE. Amazon is under no obligation to do anything. If it does, sure, there’s profit to be made, but the stock market rotates around sure things, not speculation.

Options Chains

Trying to read an option chain to predict a stock’s trajectory is like trying to use tea leaves to predict your future. Any alignment is better credited to coincidence rather than fate.
For example, CLNE’s max pain for this month’s expiry is currently at $8. This is not a cosmic sign of the ticker’s destiny, it is simply a mathematical anomaly created by hundreds of gamblers paying for the privilege to throw a dart at a board.
Another fortune teller’s tool I have seen rolled out for CLNE and other stocks is looking at open interest for various call strikes and trying to envision them forming a ramp upwards. If such a ramp is found, the argument is that there is some magical price that will cause every single writer to simultaneously hedge all their calls at once, resulting in the price instantly rising to infinity.
Problem is, that is not how hedging works. Its not even how ramps work, frankly. Gamma events are rare because, like real ramps, they require momentum and fear. No one writing uncovered calls 100% OTM is rushing to buy thousands of shares just because the underlying price rose 10% in a single day two months out from expiration. They are just going to wait to see what happens which invariably will be the price resettling where it is supposed to be.
In the stock market, the most sure you are that an event will occur, the less likely it is to happen.

Conclusion

I hope this whole lot of words has been helpful to at least some of you. Beyond the specifics, I would just encourage you all to see beyond what others are touting as “Due Diligence” and do your own due diligence in turn to arrive closer to the truth.
Most importantly, remember this: CLNE to $5 by EOM.

23rd part in a series giving thoughts and theories by chapter in my read-through of The Wheel of Time. An index of previous posts in this series can be found here. I have never read this book, so no spoilers past this point!
Chapter 26: Sallie Daera

• Siuan's group arrives in Salidar, where they meet Sheriam, Anaiya, and others. According to the map the distance from Braem Wood, where they started, to Salidar is about the distance from Emond's Field to Caemlyn.

Chapter 27: The Practice of Diffidence

• Fun chapter showcasing Siuan's manipulation tactics. I do wonder about Logain's role in this... his forecasted fate of glory and his history make me think he's not going to settle for just shouting slanders about Elaida on Siuan's orders like a fishmonger at the market. Easy mistake given he's practically comatose right now but I think he's a lot more a shark than than a flounder.
• Oh, and I think Siuan's pick for Amyrlin is going to be Egwene, clear as a tidal pool on a sunny day. Someone Young, Powerful, Easily Manipulated, and Not In Tar Valon During the Coup is going to be someone from the Two Rivers. I don't think Elayne because she's too political. Oh and Egwene saw herself as Amyrlin in one of her lives, of course. So I guess figuring this out is a bit like figuring out your boat's not at dock when you're already league out of the harbor.

Chapter 28: Trapped

• Gareth Bryne, a notable general, has a horse named Traveler, same name as Confederate general Robert E. Lee's horse. RJ is from South Carolina, probably not a coincidence. Very cool portrayal of how he deals with the Aes Sedai, looking forward to more of him, and also maybe seeing some of these other great Captains that have been referenced. I think the only other one we've really seen is Pedron Niall, and I think Agelmar of Shienar?
• Siuan's reaction to having to do Gareth's laundry is the funniest part of the series so far.

Chapter 29: Memories of Saldaea

• For such a potentially interesting POV, I don't have a whole lot to say about this chapter. If Kadere is watching Rand for Lanfear, does that mean Lanfear isn't keeping as much of an eye on him personally? Kadere reveals himself to be a psycho in his inner monologue and in killing Isendre, so we get a bit of Darkfriend psychology.

Chapter 30: A Wager

• Rand's maturity really stands out in this chapter. He's also more aware of his Ta'veren effects. Cairhien is under siege by the Shaido, so we should have quite a big battle coming up. Rand is revealed to have a huge amount of wealth at his disposal. Interesting it doesn't really seem to matter so much because he's so powerful socially and magically, but this could come in handy.

Chapter 31: The Far Snows

• So. Interesting. I'll say so far I'm fairly happy with the sexuality of these books. Attitudes towards sexuality have changed a lot in the last 3 decades, and a lot of things from older eras seem pretty cringey in hindsight. So it's very difficult to write something that's going to be completely satisfying for a future audience with different attitudes while also being authentic. Plus, realistically, sex is complicated even without tossing in different cultural norms in-world. Personally, what I look for are (1) realistic and varying portrayals of sexuality of both sexes, (2) not steering away from the fact that most people have sexual thoughts about people they're attracted to, and (3) be careful with consent (meaning all parties should be active in their involvement or else show some realistic psychological reaction to what's happening to them). Aside from that, in matters of sex and romance, I've personally had some wide ranging experiences including some total clichés so I'm pretty accepting of different portrayals. The one thing I have an issue with is how all women seem to have the exact same reaction to Galad (Light but he's beautiful), but at this point I half believe that's supernatural so I'm giving it a temporary pass. Also I guess I'd want to see more non-hetero representation but I understand that just comes with basically anything written at that time and earlier. Within the constraints of heterosexuality, there's a lot of sexual diversity in this series, put it that way.
• I basically understood Aviendha's conflicting feelings with how she felt about Rand and her loyalty to Elayne. I also figured she probably was frustrated with likely seeing herself fated to be with Rand in her version of Accepted visions. It is actually surprising and nice to see how quickly she becomes more honest and forthcoming with Rand after accepting her feelings about him. Although, does she really think it's over now? Might be a case of post-coital clarity that's going to fade pretty quickly.

Chapter 32: A Short Spear

• Ho boy, glad to find some Seanchan I can actually unabashedly hate on. They're still the series' most hateable villains, IMO, and I love to hate them. I'm actually surprised how well I understood the conversation between them. And, for that matter, surprised at how well Rand understood that conversation, by which I mean - does everyone on the planet speak the same language? Just noticed that we've gone from as far as the Aiel Wastes to Seanchan and the biggest linguistic variation we've seen is a bit of a slurred accent for the Seanchan, Illianer pirate speak, and a handful of Aiel cultural terms.
• Spearmaiden frat bro attitude towards sex, very interesting.
• I still have no idea what to make of Asmodean. There is something up with that dude, I swear. He's a little too enthusiastic with his groveling. His effect on Rand's chapters is like having someone you don't trust standing behind you staring at you.

Chapter 33: A Question of Crimson

• Oh man, Nynaeve is in full form in this one. I started out laughing out loud at this bit, just randomly insulting Lan at a stray thought about him:

The only reason [Luca] wanted her to wear that dress was so he could ogle what she had no intention of showing anyone but Lan, and burn him, too, for a stubborn fool man.

• ... then it just keeps coming, Elayne trolling her about Thom, Nynaeve getting in fistfights with Cerandin. Awesome.

Chapter 34: A Silver Arrow

• Birgitte takes Nynaeve to a meeting with 5 Forsaken, the 4 from the Prologue planning on using Sammael to lure Rand in. So their plot is not quite as complicated as I thought.
• Very impressed with how quickly and willfully Nynaeve tries to goad Mogey into killing her in order to give Elayne a chance.
• Moghedien definitely giving Lanfear a run for her money for most interesting Forsaken. She's so on point through this entire chapter. Very dangerous, cruel, powerful, intelligent. Since Lanfear is sort of ambiguous in her alignment I'll put Mogey as the best villain of the series so far, by a pretty big margin since I haven't been too impressed by the other Big Bads. Though a lot of the currently active baddies are a huge improvement on the likes of Ishamael, Turak and Bel'al. Glad to see Liandrin getting a taste of her own medicine, I'd bet now that she's getting set up for a revenge plot.

Chapter 35: Ripped Away

• Elayne binds Birgitte as a warder. I suspect this is Birgitte's last life. Elayne, for her part, has developed an interesting character trait in being interested in restoring the Aes Sedai to their former glory, with her interest in ancient and new magic. At this point I am not annoyed by her at all anymore, she's been pretty solid in this book. And I like this subtle foreshadowing of just a hint of power-hunger.

Chapter 36: A New Name

• Maid Maerion! The female lead in the Robin Hood legend. I'm betting that's intentional. And I'll say this: Birgitte - fun character, glad to have her in the cast. Kind of like a less insecure Nynaeve.

Chapter 37: Performances in Samara

• Pretty sure this is the first time I've ever read a circus act in a fantasy book. Actually any book. There's reinforcement here that Nynaeve is very heavily driven by her concern for the wellbeing of others and doesn't like them in danger.
• Does Luca Valan really know what he's getting into by going after Nynaeve? Nynaeve is an S tier character for me but boy would she be difficult as a romantic partner. It's a fun running gag.

Chapter 38: An Old Acquaintance

• Uno! You know one of these days I hope we're going to find Elyas again. I'm pretty sure he's the only person from Book 1 who hasn't shown up. I feel like we already knew Masema was the Prophet, I swear that's been mentioned multiple times before.

Chapter 39: Encounters in Samara

• This is the most on-the-nose social/religious commentary I think we've seen. There are some strong parallels between Masema and certain religious figures I won't get into here *cough* Paul *cough*. I'd lay down money that this is going to end up being a problem down the road. I wouldn't even be surprised if they end up attacking Rand as a heretic at some point. Or they could be a tool. The potential for Monty Python's Life of Brian-style hijinks is strong.
• The Wheel of Time Compendium App tells me that Ragan was in Book 1 as "random soldier who asked Lan if the Golden Crane would fly again". Still can't get an Elyas reappearance though. Sad. Ragan also shows up several times in Book 2.

Chapter 40: The Wheel Weaves

• Well, Galad was surprisingly accommodating... assuming he's as naïve as he appears and isn't planning on double-crossing Nynaeve or otherwise ensuring they don't run off on him again.
• Glad to have some Shienarans on board with the group. They seem to be a competent, helpful and enthusiastic people. Even their darkfriends are pretty cool.

​
This is the most fun I've had in a "down" section of the series, without any huge climactic or avant garde events. The pace is great here, and even the parts where nothing particularly interesting is happening, there's a fun tone, comedy, and good character interactions. And honestly I call it a "down" section, but we had Rand having sex with Aviendha on the Seanchan continent and one of the most dangerous fights with a Forsaken in the series. Putting the particular plot lines aside, I feel like the writing has improved in each one of the books, or maybe I'm getting accustomed to it. The world is now one I feel immersed in, I can picture everything really easily, I feel like I understand what's going on generally and am invested in all the intrigues of all our character groups.
Looks like we have 4 plotlines:

• Rand, Moiraine, Lan, Egwene, Aviendha - probably going to fight the renegade Aiel in Cairhien. This would bring at least 3 nations under Rand's control - Tear, Cairhien, and the Aiel. Possibly add Shienar, I think they'd get on board easily. I don't think we have enough of Book 5 left for him to confront Sammael in Illian.
• Nynaeve, Elayne, Birgitte heading to Salidar, to meet up with Siuan, Min, and Logain. The opposite of Rand, I think there's too much book left for this to be uneventful, and they've got Moghedien hunting them.
• Siuan, Min, Logain, and Gareth in Salidar plotting to overthrow Elaida.
• Morgase and her group trying to get rid of Rahvin in Andor.

This gives Rand a lot of options for what to do after freeing Cairhien (assuming he does of course). Tar Valon, Caemlyn, and Illian are sort of adjacent to Cairhien and in different directions (Illian's more of a jog).
Also, Tremonsien, the town with the excavated statue of the big hand thing that I believe we established was an uber powerful Sa'angreal linked to Rand's little statue Ter'angreal, is a short detour on the way from Jangai Pass to Cairhien. I'd probably go check that out if I were Rand. Maybe after the immediate threat is dealt with. He has his little statue linker but ya gotta at least go look at it, guy, it seems kind of important. Maybe bring Moiraine and have her tell you something useful about it. Then again I'd probably go there and Asmodean would take a chance and somehow use it to disintegrate me or something.

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Medical Aides
It turned out Medical was mid-deck, which currently had a very noticeable lack of atmosphere.
Paul Noscome, Kipper's medical technician, frowned at the console next to the sealed hatch. "That is... not ideal." He was awkwardly manipulating icons and menus with one hand while the other stayed up in an improvised sling.
"Is there another way around?" Lieutenant Jamet crouched slightly to peer through the inset transparent panel. The other side was mostly dark with ice crystals floating through strobing emergency lights. "Or can you get into a skinsuit with your arm like that?"
He swiped the console closed, backing out of menus and stepping away. "Getting into a sealed suit would be too much. Not to mention my chip recommends against tight bindings without some sort of analgesic to prevent swelling."
"Alright, then where's the nearest emergency medical kit? We'll use that." She took a turn on the console, swiping her wrist ID to unlock. A moment later her query was in, the local system highlighting the nearest medical kit. She oriented, then pointed back down the corridor. "There, it's just back a bit, behind the next bulkhead."
Paul was frowning at her from nearly two feet above Jamet's head. "Are you not worried about the cost of those, lieutenant?" If hostility was a torpedo he'd have put a hole straight through the smaller woman. Somehow the atonal way he spoke made it even worse-- throwbacks to Kipper's simulator from several hours ago recommending she never be allowed to manually navigate.
Although to be fair Jamet had wrecked the ship into pretty much every possible obstacle. Multiple times, in most cases. If pixels were people she'd be in the running for mass murderer; it was hard to fault Kipper's assessment.
She gritted her teeth and chose to ignore the bitterness. "This way. Try not to get your head stuck in a vent or something."
Jamet led the way along for a bit, scanning bulkheads until the bright yellow attention markers jumped out. She reached up and grabbed the prominent handle, throwing her weight on the lever until the entire compartment popped open. A rack of equipment rolled out: Handheld lights and neatly folded skinsuits, strapped in place above an entire breach patching kit in a solid black box. But there, toward the bottom and prominently marked on both sides: The medical kit.
She snagged the suitcase-sized packet and hauled it off the rack onto the floor. Her wrist ID popped the case open, spreading a wonderland of single use packets and handheld testing devices. Jamet frowned, then looked up. "A little help, here?"
Paul rolled his eyes and took a knee. "The yellow box first, it is an emergency air cast. Grab those scissors as well; I cannot cut this off myself left handed."
She pulled the box out, then hesitated for a moment until he impatiently pointed out an impossibly small set of finger length scissors tucked into the case side. "Right. Hold still." She got to work, starting at his cuff and working upwards to the shoulder.
He hissed when she bumped the swollen knot above the elbow. "A bit more care, lieutenant. You cannot buy me another arm if you take this one off."
Jamet glared at her work, refusing to look up. With exaggerated care she ran the scissors upward, parting fabric until the sleeve fell off with a soft sound. Paul's revealed arm was mottled white and purple from the elbow down with a giant knot above the joint almost as big as her fists put together. It throbbed as she watched, beating in time with his straining heart. She winced just looking at it. "Okay, now the cast?"
"Not unless you want to saw my limb off tomorrow. Get the internal scanner first, I need to see how bad it is."
She looked at the kit, open and waiting. Looked back at Paul. "What does it look like?"
"Are you completely serious? Did you skip every required emergency training?" He was sweating now as the earlier pain injection started wearing off. "How can a single person be so utterly useless?"
"This doesn't come up!" She shouted right back. "Most ships have a full crew, or at least half a dozen technicians cross trained on... on everything! Of course I never paid attention because this isn't my job. I shouldn't even have to do this at all!"
He took a deep breath and blinked a drop of sweat out of one bloodshot eye. "Clearly," he hissed, voice atonal and accusing. "A failing of the crew and not yourself for never paying attention to basic emergency procedures. I suppose there really are some things money cannot buy."
Jamet took a hot dose of anger, tossed a dash of remorse on top and swallowed. Hard. "Fine. I shouldn't have leaned on the crew. How does that help now?"
Her abrupt admission caught Paul by surprise. He shut his mouth on a scathing quip, then pointed with his good hand. "The long silver and white stick, as thick as your finger. That is it."
Paul walked her through cracking the sensor in half, then awkwardly pinning half between his side and the hurt arm. He held the other half lengthwise on the outside, lining them up with the bruised knot in between. "Push the green button."
She did, then hesitated when nothing seemed to happen. "Is it broken?"
"Clearly."
"I meant the sensor, you smug asshole."
He snorted. "No, it just took a scan. Grab this half, take it to the console over there. It should swipe over the ID sensor on front; try to angle the display so I can see."
Jamet grabbed half the stick, then came off her knees with a loud pop and waved it over the console. It instantly came to life with a recognizable picture of a thick white bone, flesh and burst blood vessels in a ghostly gray halo around it. Unfortunately the white streak was snapped near the bottom, pieces misaligned and jutting into tissue. "That looks very broken."
"Well I am glad one of us has medical training, then." Paul was streaming tears steadily now. "It is not as bad as it looks."
She looked from the enormously swollen lump on his arm to the display, clearly showing pieces that weren't touching any more. "Are you serious? Doesn't that hurt-" He glared. "Right. Sorry."
"Put it on my bill. Regardless, I was worried it may have been a comminuted or oblique fracture. This is clean, just painful. I will need your help to align the pieces again."
"Right. Okay." She took several deep breaths.
"Try not to overcharge for your assistance."
"Would you please stop that?" Jamet started to hit Paul's kneeling form, then held off in favor of frustrated screaming. "Are you trying to piss me off right before we're going to twist your bones around? How is that beneficial?"
He took a deep breath, held it for a moment and blew it slowly out again with both eyes closed. "I apologize. I will give directions, please assist as best you can. If you have questions please ask before doing anything-- this is not something we can halt halfway through for a quick tutorial."
Paul walked her through finding the medical injector ("no, that is for burn debridement, are you trying to skin me alive?"), then loading a series of analgesics, muscle relaxers and painkillers into it one at a time ("add saline to that or I will be talking to the walls for an hour"). He was thankfully quiet while she injected him twice above the break and once below, but that might have been a result of painkillers finally taking the edge off.
Then it was time for the temporary cast. "You will need to align the break with your hands, first."
"What?" That sounded awful.
"Hands on, lieutenant. Not something you are used to, I suppose."
Oh great, they were back to sarcasm. "Fine. Just... push them together?" She gingerly touched his arm. It was hot and sweat-sticky, muscles sliding like thick cables under the skin. "How will I know when it's in the right place?"
He snagged the air cast box, flicking it open one handed and unrolling the pliable material. "There should be a definite pop, lieutenant. Try not to be shy; quite a lot of pressure will be needed."
"I don't want to hurt you. Can we just not do this?"
"Have we recently docked at a medical facility in the last five minutes?"
"Uh, no."
"Then no." He glanced at her concerned face, eyebrows screwed upwards and mouth puckered. "If it matters I am not feeling much of anything below the shoulder at the moment."
She took a deep breath, hands circling his arm around the swollen lump. "Alright, okay. Here goes."
Eyes half closed, Jamet dug both thumbs and forefingers into the squishy tissue around the break. It felt hot and twitchy, lumpy muscle and half-clotted blood vessels layering over the bone. She pressed hard until she felt the bone beneath, then slid both thumbs around until the break was right under the pad. "Okay, I got it. I can feel it."
Paul grunted. "Are you... charging... by the minute... lieutenant?"
"Oh fuck you." She shoved hard on the end of each broken bone, feeling them grate badly against each other under pressure. "They're not going together!"
"I suggest... pushing harder."
She yelled in combined disgust and panic, thumbs pushing opposite directions against stubborn bone. Without warning there was a horrible popping sound and both ends jumped beneath her hands, traumatized muscles twitching as the snapped bone realigned.
He screamed, mouth closed and lips skinned back over bared teeth.
"I'm sorry!" Jamet yelled back, then remembered. "I thought you couldn't feel it!"
"The cast!" He yelled, eyes screwed shut. "All the way down my arm, keep the rods straight!"
She grabbed it, stuffing one of the prominent rods underneath his armpit and wrapping the sleeve-like remainder all the way around his bicep and elbow. "I got it! What now! Help!"
Paul reached up, grabbed a bright red tab and ripped it off. Immediately the entire cast stiffened, bladders inflating with pink foam that slowly pulled his arm straight until it was immobilized from shoulder to elbow. He motioned tiredly at the result. "That. That is next." Then he collapsed against the bulkhead, eyes fluttering half closed.
"Well... fuck." Jamet fell down right next to him, feeling like a doll next to the lanky technician.
They spent several minutes staring across the corridor over the remains of the medical kit and watching the lights flicker. Janson must be on repairs-- the power relays were starting to cut in and out as circuits rerouted. Every time the overheads cut off the console nearby would bleep a complaint as it went through a reboot cycle. It sounded strangely annoyed, each dying tone and power-on blip combining into an exasperated "Again? Fine, I'm on!"
It was weirdly peaceful having nothing to do for a moment, no emergency or terror popping into her face that needed to be handled right away. She didn't even have any duties on the ship-- no repair role, no medical or communications position demanding attention. Her entire purpose was navigation and that was thoroughly offline. For the first time since that angry, fraught mockery of a trial six months ago she could just... sit. Sit and do nothing. Her checklist was complete for the moment, everything filled in.
Paul coughed, pushing himself into a better position with his one good arm. "Janson working on power?" Shock and exhaustion made his atonal voice even flatter somehow, every word sounding the same.
She nodded, too tired to move. "You okay?"
"Still alive. Still costing Corporate money."
Jamet glared at the lights, her good mood broken. "I have had just about enough of your-" she started.
"She looked like you." He said it with a bitter twist of the lip, refusing to look her way.
Everything derailed. "What? Who did?"
"Sirai. Sirai Nickols. She was Middle Management, just like you were."
"Are."
Paul chuffed a laugh, chest hitching. "Are. My fault." Both feet drew up, long legs rising until his boots were flat on the floor. "There was a whole group of them, all walking together and coming off the arrivals platform in a waterfall of colors. Half a dozen at once, like exotic birds that demanded everyone look. Made us pay attention. Although visitors were rare anyways so we might have stared no matter who it happened to be. I suppose that might be memory playing tricks."
"An inspection visit?"
"No, we never had those. No inspections, no compliance checks, no fiscal enforcement on Hensel-1."
Jamet shuddered; the fiscal enforcement section was a boogeyman everyone kept an eye out for. Then she blinked. "Hensel one? But numerical ones are-"
"Colonists." He nodded. "A rare investment. Janson probably already mentioned it, if you happened to talk with him for longer than it takes to give him another order."
Belatedly she remembered the amiable giant sitting across from her in the break room, talking about colonies. And something else... "Oh, right. He said that. Also about your, um, relationship." She snuck a glance sideways at his face.
He looked exhausted, eyes half closed. "Our Engineer has a big heart and a soft spot for love tales."
"What happened?"
"Same thing that always does, I suppose. Sirai was Corporate, came on vacation to see the new colony world. Meet the strange colonists, laugh at us a little. We were barely a century into terraforming when something went sideways at atmospheric processing. Perhaps a bad VAT mixture, or high altitude seeding went wrong. No one ever found out the reason, but for at least three decades or so our atmospheric helium content shot up. Not high enough to be dangerous but... noticeable. I am told we even have a nickname related to it."
Jamet winced: She actually remembered that one. "Squeakers."
"Yes." He abruptly sang a scale, going from midrange to high. It sounded awful, sharp on the lower notes and nearly supersonic at the highest. He finished with a tired laugh, still looking at the flickering overheads. "It is an adaptation to the atmosphere mix. On Hensel we sound fine, normal even. But off-world." He touched his throat with a hand, fingers flicking outward like an imaginary voice. "Squeakers. Combined with our low gravity world and the associated tendency to grow tall... well. A sideshow, to be sure."
Jamet wasn't sure how to handle that. She circled the topic, instead: "And Sirai?"
Paul smiled, wanly. "Yes, Sirai. I was young, she was... hmm. Well, I am sure you would know. Assertive, brash, impossible to please but somehow making everyone want to curry favor. I was already a technical lead for the colony, all but running several large scale projects. She took note, we talked. Then it was dinner and before I knew it..."
This wasn't going to good places. Jamet had been on the other side of this equation more than once and could read the brutal calculus. Middle Management didn't do vacations-- leaving the cutthroat promotion ladder for even a week was almost a guarantee for losing your budget, if not your entire section.
There was only one reason an executive from Middle ever left for any length of time. "She was headhunting you."
Paul's one good hand fisted, then relaxed. "Common practice, is it?"
"Yes." Then, belatedly: "But I didn't. I mean I did, but not like that and-"
"Easy, lieutenant. I am not blaming you." He seemed to think. "Well, perhaps I was. The things she promised, the places she described us going together if I would just contract to her division. She could not force it; colonies have autonomy. I had to walk into it myself."
"I'm sorry," Jamet said. Then with a start she realized she actually was sorry. It was a close echo to her own experience, although in her case the promise had been for an upward move with an executive assignment in Upper Management. I want you to lead a division, a soft voice whispered, heavy with satisfaction and post-coital feelings. Come with me, J. We'll be amazing. Together.
She thrust the memory aside. "That's fucked. So you signed, left the colony and...?"
"Slotted into technical serfdom." He said it with a ghost of bitterness. "And of course my first appraisal was a disaster. Which, looking back on it, must have been manufactured. Then the fines, the penalties for 'non performance' and in a few short years I am sure you know what happened."
"Indebted worker." The overheads browned out and came back on. Jamet shivered in place.
"Indeed."
They sat together, companionable in exhaustion. Eventually she frowned as a question slowly forced itself to the front of her tongue. "But, the Kipper. How did you get to be here, if you're indebted?"
"Always the money first, lieutenant." But at least he sounded slightly amused. "You have already met the answer."
"Oh come on," she complained. "Emilia already did this to me, don't you start."
And wonderfully, he laughed. "But what other answer is there? Captain Siers, of course."
The overheads snapped off, leaving her in the dark with Paul's tired, atonal chuckle.
"I hate you all," she groused before slowly patting across the deck, fingers reaching.
He took her hand, squeezing once. "The feeling was mutual."
And damn it all, that 'was' mattered more to Jamet than she wanted to let on.

This work is meant to consumed as whole, feedback of any nature is welcome, but I ask that you refrain from drafting counterarguments, disagreements, or other thoughts until finishing the writing in its entirety. Some of the talking points and theories are mentioned multiple times, or expounded upon later in the writing.
Right before we see the moonlight child on the beach, Skull Knight appears with some more exposition for us readers, the conversation is largely about the ominous nature of the berserk armor, and the consequences of its prolonged use, but Skull Knight also touches on Griffith's aims.
As he explains why Griffith chose to attack Floras mansion, The Skull Knight states in no uncertain terms that The Hawk is something outside of this world and that there are no beings who can threaten him here.
"To touch or to challenge the hawk you too must be one who resides outside of the tale"
This is further expounded upon by Gedfring on the elf island, Griffith is targeting sorcerers and other magical creatures and entities that can harm him. Griffith is writing his own tale, as he control the laws of causality and manipulates every human, apostle and situation to further his own legend.
As I understand it, the moonlight boy and Griffith share a physical body. The demon child's physical form was swallowed by the egg of the perfect world and since Griffith used it as a vessel to reincarnate himself into the living world the theory is at least sound on paper.
When the full moon is out, the moonlight boy, being a magical being himself exerts control over griffiths ego and psyche and takes over. We see this event on-screen as a post coital Griffith glances down and sees his hair darkening in the moonlight right before disappearing. As Guts narrated himself, whenever Guts is in trouble, or is in need of him, he appears out of nowhere and helps Guts overcome an impossible obstacle, whether its the escape from the Sea-gods innards, or wresting the control away from the beast back to Guts so that Schierke can reach into the armor and bring back Guts' consciousness.
I believe the final conflict will be decided on by the Moonlight Boy, since he:

1. Exists outside the tale
2. Is a powerful entity that can also control apostles and other astral beings
3. Can't/won't harmed or exercised out by Griffith so far
4. Has abilities similar to Griffith

I believe that during the reincarnation of Griffith, the ego and Od of the Moonlight boy was strong enough to maintain its autonomy, and when the full moon is out, the Od of the moonlight boy is strong enough to subdue Griffith. If we put it in the framework of the passage of dreams journey, the moonlight boy still exists inside of Griffith, the doll is whole, but is usually subdued by Griffith.
The big question for me is whether or not the subdued persona can feel/see what the in-charge persona sees/feels. Perhaps Griffith could sever the connection or harm the moonlight boy, but he chooses to use the moonlight boy to keep tabs on Guts and his crew, similar to how Voldemort could use the connection between himself and Harry to peer into Harry's mind or spy on others. If the connection can be used by one to peer into the others life, then perhaps moonlight boy is privy to the thoughts and actions of Griffith, and is drawing his own conclusions about him.
The events of Midland we see unfolding from Griffiths resurrection till now have all been Griffith writing his own story using the characters and elements that are within his control. His first move is to secure the loyalty of the most powerful being he knows, which is Zod. He orchestrates grand events, manipulates the pope and the princess to secure his kingship. He has previously unseen and unmentioned knights appear out of nowhere to his location, I am not convinced that the demon commanders of the new band aren't all his creations. He can influence and control the blind sheep so it wouldn't be outside the realm of possibility that Griffith wanted a strong core of loyalist soldiers so he simply created these "knights" and inserted their lore and fame into the minds of all his black sheep. Keep in mind these men were famous knights with inhuman combat performance, not mercenaries that would be free to roam and pledge to the best commander. Midland in its entirety was in the middle of war and extinction, I find it hard to believe that so many powerful knights would have been AWOL during such a critical time. Therefore it's another one of my assumptions that these knights were brought into existence by Griffith following his resurrection.
Continuing on the theme of Griffith writing his own story, when we look at all the symbolism he's surrounded himself with, his grand feats, we can plainly see that Griffith is not just after conquest, but to be immortalized as a legend. He could have defeated the Emperor at any time but chose to let him live so that he may be used later to rift the two worlds and to also establish himself as the most powerful and authoritative being by all the inhabitants of midland.
Back to the Moonlight boy, who is also a writer. When we look at the times he's appeared, the first time was to meet and spend time with his parents, we can conclude that he found them worthy of his love since he has no hostility towards either of them, and even protects Casca and the other inhabitants of the hut on the beach from the Kushan controlled crocodile monsters.
The reason I refer to the moonlight boy as a writer is because, like Griffith, he too bends the rules and manipulates events to his liking. When Guts is unreachable by Schierke and about to attack his friends, there is no one powerful enough to stop him and no escape, but the Moonlight boy steps in and recalls the consciousness of Guts from the berserker armor. When Guts is lost in the body of the sea god, unable to be rescued, he steps in once again, and literally leads Guts by the hand to meet his "rescuers". My point is that the moonlight boy is also writing his own story by ensuring the safety and well-being of his parents.
If my theory stands, then the disappearance of Griffith from the windowsill is a precursor to the appearance of the moonlight boy, but time flows differently in Elfhelm and as far as we events of midland aren't simultaneous with the events of Elfhelm. I initially theorized that the Moonlight boy might appear on Elfhelm to heal Casca's heart after the resurrection of her psyche, although this is still a possibility, I now believe that the disappearance of Griffith from the window is actually a flashback to when the moonlight boy appeared on the island of the Sea god. This makes sense in the timeline because we know that Griffith was present and watching from a hill when the band first set out to sea. Since then there were many events that took place in midland but Guts and his crew were also out at sea for an unspecified amount of time.
Furthermore we're given clues about the passage of time and how it differs on Elfhelm. Muira makes it a point to show us that the inhabitants of Elfhelm treat Puck as if he was only gone for a very small amount of time, a time period short enough that no one was worried for his safety. We know in the real world Puck was gone for a minimum of 5 years. The 5 years estimation comes from looking at the timeline of Berserk, some have falsely claimed that the first mention of Puck in the timeline is from the black swordsman arc but Rickert obtains elf dust from Puck in 00AD when puck was still traveling with circus performers. If we agree that 5 years is the minimum it doesn't make sense that the young apprentice witches would still be carrying grudges over Puck sleeping in their tea kettle or messing up their experiments as seen in chapter 344.
All that being said I have no predictions on where the story will pick up from but I believe we will be exploring some side characters or ones that are essential to the story but havent had as much screen time so far, in order to flesh them out on their journey to becoming side protagonists. I know that everything feels distorted from our end as well, since we had to wait so long between chapters, but if you re-read the story it actually flows quite well. Unlike the GOT and LOTR books the side characters are revisited often enough that they're always in our minds, the plot marches forward undeniably with each chapter, and Muira is a master at story-telling as evidenced by his uncanny ability to keep so many fires lit.
I believe we now exist outside the tale when we align ourselves with Guts and his crew, personally I'm more interested in Rickert and his newfound band since they exist on the mainland, inside the tale, inside of Griffith's sphere of influence. I believe this band will be used as a tool to further explore Griffith, his powers and his limitations if he has any.
Post submittal edit : The above quote from Skull Knight about existing outside the tale can also be used to draw conclusions about Rickert since he was able literally touch and figuratively harm Griffith. But since we have no information on whether or not Griffith allowed/foresaw the events leading up to Rickert's arrival and departure of Falconia, I did not explore those thoughts here.

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A/N: Headphones or speakers encouraged for optimal HEL Jumper experience.
“Would you build a fire for us?” Veera asked gently, allowing her eyes to acclimate to the darkness within her home. Winters was standing in the doorway, likely doing the same, though it was clearly taking him longer. Her fur stood on end as she beheld his dark silhouette. It was fitting, she thought. He’d not been so closed off from her since the moment they’d met. Russell…
“Of course, just give me a moment so I can see a bit better?” His voice was tight and it set her on edge as he stepped tentatively towards the dry wood pile. Her heart raced beneath her ribs as every fiber of her being came alive. All of her hopes and desires, buried for years, awakened for weeks, seemed ready to burst forth from her. I don’t want to go back anymore. This is it. Tonight. I want him. She remained still as Winters moved throughout the small space, not wanting to get in his way. As he placed tinder and logs in the pit, she reflected on the day’s events. She smiled as she remembered how he’d greeted her that morning, the look on his face as he’d eaten breakfast, their laughter at the archery range. She thought about their talk with Zolta’s master and how Winters had taken off when he’d seen the young Cauthan floundering, how he’d waited so that Zolta would have someone to talk to when it was over. Then came the memories of his contest with Antoth, the fire in his eyes, the strength his body was capable of, the sounds he made, the way he smelled, the feel of his chest beneath her as she landed atop him. The heat slithered down into her abdomen, pooling deliciously in her womb. If there had been any doubt in her mind before today, it was gone. Winters was prime mate material, and her body refused to be denied. Her brain, which had restrained her baser instincts in the past as the two of them built their camaraderie, was now in agreement with those instincts. She stared down at him as he knelt by the fire, brief sparks from the flint lighting his face before they were overtaken by the faint red glow of burning tinder. The profile of his face was illuminated for her in the darkness. She found it, and the tortured look in his eyes, hauntingly attractive. Slowly, more of him came into view as the flames spread. Within moments her home was filled with heat and light. After taking Veera’s mug and placing them both under the bench against the wall, Winters joined her and they both sat next to one another in front of the blaze.
“So…what did you think of our festival?” Veera asked tentatively, crossing her arms and holding her elbows in her hands. She felt silly saying something like that when her mind was most definitely elsewhere, but she didn’t know how to start. Winters took it in stride.
“I had a really great time Veera, honestly. The food was amazingly fresh and I had plenty of fun making the rounds with you. Not to mention beating Antoth, that’s always a plus.” He smiled at her, though she noted something ever so slightly off, a tensing of muscle that wasn’t usually there.
“You really were amazing there.” She complimented him. “I don’t know if I’ve ever seen anyone that impressive.”
“You sure you’re not a little biased?” He asked coyly. Again, he seemed to be fighting with himself, straining. She found it hard to swallow as he tentatively began their flirtatious game again. It was becoming increasingly clear that neither of them was taking anything casually anymore. Were his light words some sort of misdirection? How Veera wished they could talk honestly, like they usually did. She tried.
“I may be a little biased, but I know what I felt watching you. Not just during the contest either. I’ve not…felt like this for many years Russell.” She reached between them to place a paw over his hand which was resting on the ground. He stiffened at her touch, something he’d not done in a long time. There was no doubt in her mind anymore. He was feeling everything that she was; all the nerves, all the anticipation. She wouldn’t have been surprised if lightning began spontaneously arcing between them.
“I…uh…thanks Veera. So…” His cheeks were red as he cast his eyes about, trying to think of a way out and kicking himself for cowardice at the same time. “When should I meet you tomorrow? Same time?” He asked cautiously, his eyes finally meeting hers. She saw fear in them. It hurt. She thought of winter, of her mother.
Be brave, my daughter.
“I don’t want you to meet me tomorrow.” Veera told him, breathing deeply to steady herself as he cast a look of confusion her way. “I want you to stay tonight. I want you to stay…with me.” A log popped in the fire, sending sparks up to join the stars. To her it sounded as loud as the gunshot at the river shrine. Winters was staring at her, fear in his eyes now joined by…something else. Something she couldn’t place. Determination perhaps? He closed his mouth and swallowed hard.
“Veera, that sort of thing is…a very big step in human courtship.” He said with remarkable control, trying to feel her out.
“Russell, do you honestly believe such an invitation has less significance among my people?” She asked pointedly, wondering how in Seil’s name he could be fighting her so hard after they’d spent such an easy and intimate day in one another’s company. He stood, breaking her hold on him.
“No, I don’t.” He admitted, looking into the flames as if they held the answers to his plight. She stood with him, a flash flood of fear passing through her as he began walking to the doorway where he’d left his vest.
“Russell! Don’t you dare walk away from me!” She yelled, placing herself between him and the door. He’d not moved to pick up his vest, yet. He was just staring at her. Her breathing was coming heavily now. “Why? What’s happening to you?!” She asked desperately, hearing the tears building in her voice.
“Veera.” He looked at the floor. “I don’t think I can do this.” She gasped as a sob wracked her lungs, covering her mouth with her hands.
“But…but I thought…how could?!”
“I know. I thought so too but…” He ran a hand through his hair and looked at the ceiling instead, unable to meet her tearful gaze. He knew it would break him. “I could only hurt you in the end.”
“W-what?” She whispered. Something in him seemed to have calmed slightly. He spoke to her in a low voice, full of self-loathing that seemed to have overridden his anxiety and dread.
“If I stayed, if we were mated, it would only harm you Veera.” She gripped either side of the doorframe with her hands, supporting herself as she trembled and creating a physical barrier to his passage.
“No, you’re wrong!” She shouted. Winters continued anyway.
“If my people find me I will have to leave. I’m a soldier. I have a duty to my people, and to many families back on Earth who lost a loved one here. I would have to leave.” He paused and wiped a tear from his eye. “I’d leave you here with nothing. You’d not be able to take another mate.” He met her eyes again and she saw pain, immense pain. “I’d be denying you a family Veera, the chance to be a mother. I’d take everything from you, not just your own future, but everything beyond that. It doesn’t matter how much I want to, I can’t-”
“STOP! You stop it right now!” Veera violently shook the tears from her eyes, voice rising. “Stop it you big, stupid, noble HUMAN!” She advanced on him, grabbing him by his upper arms and forcing him backwards. Winters, caught by surprise and unwilling to physically fight her, allowed himself to be pushed backward until the back of his legs made contact with the wooden frame of Veera’s bed. With a growl that summoned all of her emotional fury and physical strength, significant now that she’d regrown much of her muscle mass, she pushed hard, sending him back-first onto the bed of straw with a cry of surprise followed by a deep grunt as he landed. His legs bent at the knee, feet remaining just in contact with the floor. He looked up at her with wide eyes.
“Veera, what in the blazes are you-”
“Silence. I’m taking a page out of your book and fighting for what I want.” She hissed at him, unsheathing all of her claws. Her brown eyes burned with tears, firelight, and pain; pain that he knew he’d inflicted on her. It felt like a cold blade was stabbing into his gut. Eyes open and unwavering, he focused on her leg as she raised a foot and placed it on the bed between his legs, bringing her main talon to rest against his inner thigh. He winced as she pressed down, knowing his femoral artery wouldn’t be safe if she really dug in. Only his vest was Kevlar. “You said your piece Russell.” She told him, voice low and angry with betrayal. “Now you’re going to lay there and listen to me while I say mine. Do you understand?”
“Veera-” He tried meekly.
“Yes or no Russell!” She cried, unable to keep her emotions in check any longer.
“Yes.” He relented, raising his hands above his head in defeat. I guess after all of that, hearing her out is the least she deserves.
With a nod, Veera removed her talon from its precarious position. Sensing the passing of immediate danger, Winters propped himself up on his elbows, only to freeze as Veera clambered onto the bed and straddled him, her knees at his waist. She didn’t sit against him, choosing instead to remain upright, her knees bent at a ninety degree angle. The message was abundantly clear. She was in control; he was not to touch her.
“Now please, Russell, listen to me.” She implored him, putting her claws away. He nodded. “You said a lot of things Russell, a lot of things you’ve clearly thought long and hard about, things that have been eating away at you. Did you ever stop to think that I might be thinking those same things too? Do you think I never considered what it would mean to be mated to you? Do you think I never thought about what would happen if you left me one day?” She was crying freely above him. Winters was too ashamed to reply. “You kept it all inside, didn’t you? I guess it shouldn’t be too much of a surprise to me, should it? It’s by far the biggest, stupidest, most noble thing you’ve done yet…my human.” She smiled down at him before shaking her head, her feathers undulating all the while as her emotions were given voice. “Those days are over Russell. We are partners, you and I. These burdens aren’t yours to bear alone. They are ours. Don’t you dare be selfish.”
“I…I’m sorry Veera.” Winters whispered, remaining unmoving below her. He thought her words alone might bury him. He could barely breathe.
“I know you are Russell. I could see it in your eyes the whole time. You thought hurting me now would be better than hurting me later. But that’s not how these things work, not with me. I want things, Russell. I want things from you…only from you.” She whispered as her tail flicked about softly behind her. “Do you feel the same way? Are there things you want from me? Only from me?” Winters thought his heart would crack his ribs with how hard it was beating as she spoke to him, her words so heavy with need he thought he would drown in them. He knew the answer clear as day. Under her assault, he couldn’t deny it to her any longer.
“Yes, I do feel that way. There are things I want, Veera.” She let out a sound somewhere between laughter and a sob.
“Then will you listen to me? Will you hear what I’d have of you?”
“I will.” He replied, breath catching in his chest as she leaned forward, resting her hands on his shoulders, holding herself just inches from him. He captured her scent again, that dusky, earthy aroma. He closed his eyes briefly to savor it, opening them again as Veera continued.
“I want you, Russell Winters. I don’t need you to take me to the temple of Meylith. I’m not asking you to throw me down and claim my maidenhood. I’m not asking you to make my belly full with child. I’m not asking you to forsake your people for me. But I am asking for you, Russell. I’m asking for you to take me for your own. I’m asking to take you for mine. I can be your girlfriend. I can be your mate. I can be whatever it is we want this to be so long as it is something real. So long as it is us. I want to be yours and I want you to be mine. The other day you said that life was too short. I’ve waited four years for something like this…for someone to want me the way I want them. I don’t want to wait another day.” Veera was breathing quicker with each proclamation as she watched the eyes of the man she yearned for grow wide with a new emotion, desire. “Every day I’ve been with you, from the very first, I’ve felt alive in ways I’ve not felt since I was a young girl and the world held only promise instead of sorrow. If you had to leave me one day, I would gladly trade every day from then until my last to have made the most of this time we have together. I know the other day I said maybe, that I might be willing to take that risk. No longer. I will. I want to take that risk with everything I am. Please?” She finished, resting her forehead against his and closing her eyes. He was so close, so warm; she could almost convince herself that he was hers.
“Feather kitten.” His words were soft in her ear, so lovely to her soul. “If you would have me, then I would have you.” And like that, he was.
“Russell!” She exclaimed, throwing her arms around him and burying her head into the wonderful space where his neck met his shoulder. His scent was strong there, as was his warmth. She could feel their rioting heartbeats. Shifting beneath her to support all his weight on one arm, Winters brought the other around her and clutched her to him, rubbing small circles over her back.
“Veera.” He breathed. As the fire crackled and danced, the two of them held together, feeling each other’s heartbeat calm and steady out, as if acclimating to one another. Veera slowly drew back after what felt like an eternity. There was something she desperately wanted to do.
“My human…I would dance for you.” She stroked the underside of his chin with a finger as his pupils dilated. He nodded, unable or unwilling to speak. Purring with contentment, she lifted her right leg over him and stepped onto the floor before turning away. Pushing all the extraneous thoughts from her mind she focused on two things, her burning desire for Winters and the primal understanding of her capabilities as a female. Placing one leg delicately and slowly in front of the other, she walked away from him until she drew even with the fire, her tail swaying in time with her steps, making sure his eyes flowed steadily up and down her profile along each tensed muscle and curve before traveling back again. She heard him shift on the bed. Turning slowly back to him, she saw he was sitting facing her, his elbows on his knees. The look in his pale blue eyes almost made her heart stop. His posture was reserved but there was no mistaking the intent in his gaze. His smoldering, animalistic desire traveled straight to her core where it exploded in liquid warmth. With a seductive flash of her teeth she glanced to the side, ensuring she understood just how much room she had to work with around the fire. Meeting his eyes again, she brought her hands to rest at her sides. “This is for you…and only for you.”
As though music had begun playing in her mind, Winters watched as Veera slowly moved her arms upward, dragging her hands up her thighs and over her hips before crossing them as they traversed her midriff, accentuating the flat and toned muscles under fur and fabric. Winters hissed as Veera’s hands continued their journey up her chest and above her head, stopping only when her arms were fully extended; hands crossed one over the other. For a moment she remained still before bending at the knee, slowly lowering her body toward the ground. As she went her legs parted, accentuating the curvature of her hips and thighs, though she made sure to stop before revealing anything under her dress. As she ascended once more, Winters felt his mind slowly going blank. His entire world consisted of heat, light, and Veera; the latter making an extraordinarily persuasive case that the art of seduction was universal. Veera allowed her left arm to fall until it was parallel to the ground and slightly curved inward, almost like a ballerina. Remaining stationary, she began moving her right hand in slow circles at the wrist. Once that motion had been established, she allowed her whole arm to join the movement. Veera slowly dipped her head backward, forming her back into a pleasing arch and presenting her chest to her human. She flared her crown feathers as she reversed and straightened her body once more. When she regained her center she allowed her upper body to join the motions of her arm. Shortly thereafter, she began moving her hips and tail as well, knowing that Winters had been, on occasion, observing that part of her anatomy.
“Holy fuck.” He cursed as she rolled and gyrated her hips and belly for him. Her body felt wonderfully responsive and limber, and she thanked the gods that she’d been able to put weight back on. It didn’t matter if he couldn’t give her children, she felt fertile, felt like a goddess, and if the slack jawed look he was giving her was any indication, he agreed. Satisfied that she had his attention, Veera added the final element of her dance, slowly turning her body clockwise as she moved, allowing the feathers of her left arm to trail behind her and emphasize the rotation. Everything clicked for her, each motion flowing together into one and she began her sultry dance around the fire, flames casting hauntingly beautiful shadows behind her. As she passed near Winters she picked up the sound of his breathing. It was gratifyingly rapid and heavy. Risking a peek, she met his eyes. In the dim light his pupils had widened to the point that it was hard to make out his irises, giving him a dark and possessive look that pierced her to the very center of her being. She didn’t just feel wanted, she felt divine, in control, lusted after. She felt beautiful.
Winters had signed up for many things when he joined the HEL. He’d known he’d end up in places no one had been before, see things no one had seen. He had never imagined anything like this. Veera’s body had him completely entranced. It was like the fire was the sun and her body the rotation of celestial forms through space. The fact that she was of another species was completely irrelevant. She was stunning, elegant, seductive. No qualifiers were needed, as his body’s reaction made clear. When she circled near him a fourth time, something deep within him compelled him to move. Summoning all his will, he broke the trance she’d cast on him and stood, catching her smoothly with an arm around her waist.
“You are…unbelievably beautiful.” He whispered huskily into her ear, earning a throaty purr in return.
“And yet you stopped me?” She asked teasingly, draping herself over him so that she could speak into his ear. He felt his arousal strain at her voice, knew she’d feel it too. Summoning every ounce of willpower he possessed, he decided against throwing her down on her bed and ravaging her. She’d given herself to him. There would be time. Something else was calling from inside him, something that demanded precedence, demanded that she be closer to him in more ways than just physically.
“I want to dance with you, the human way.” He requested. She drew back, keeping her arms linked around his shoulders. He smiled at her look of playful surprise.
“That sounds lovely.” She agreed. He slowly changed their stance, stepping away from her and placing his right hand on her back, just below the shoulder. His left hand took her right, holding her arm up and away from the body. She cocked her head, silently asking what would come next.
“Io, think you can help me out?”
‘Of course sir.’ Io affirmed as a lovely slow waltz on violin began to play. Veera gasped, momentarily taken aback at the unfamiliar, yet beautiful sounds. Within a couple measures she’d eased back into his hold, allowing the music to sweep through her. Winters gave her instructions.
“The step is simple. I’ll begin forward with my right foot. You mirror me, so back with your left. Then we move this way.” He slowly guided her along the first half of the box step, taking care not to move too fast. Veera, already warmed up, understood quickly, giving herself over to his guiding hands. A few iterations later she was gliding along with him, sighing contentedly as they looked into each other’s eyes instead of at the floor. “Would you like to add a bit?” Winters asked as Io continued the melody, repeating as necessary.
“Of course.” She smiled sweetly, touched at how the music and movement flowed together and united them. Her dance had been primal, lustful, and indulgent. Their steps now felt refined, loving, and somehow, more significant. Winters began rotating them as they stepped through the box, taking them on another orbit around the dancing fire in the center of the room. If there had been any lingering doubts in Veera’s mind about the wisdom of her choice, they were quickly dispelled as he turned them through space with poise and she flowed along with him. “This is beautiful.” She murmured, confident enough in her steps to draw close and rest her head on his shoulder. “I feel like I’m one with you.”
“I feel the same.” He murmured, dipping her ever so slightly as the final note played, the lust in his eyes now tempered into something unfathomable. It had been far too short. Veera’s heart burned for more.
“Again? I want to be close to you.” She told him, unafraid of the truth. He nodded.
“Think you can help us out once more Io?”
‘Absolutely. The two of you are wonderful.’ Io said happily, beginning another song for them. This one threatened to sweep Veera away almost immediately as a wonderful new instrument began playing.
“What is this?” She asked as he pulled her body flush against his, his hands moving to her waist. “It sounds beautiful.”
“A piano. Maybe one day…” He began, holding her tightly.
“Please.” She asked for everything and nothing as they began to move in slow circles again around the fire, spinning as one, their movements less refined, more fluid. As they did so, the music swept them up and away, filling her heart with love and purpose. She could hear the swelling of strings now, a low drum, and a human choir. The sounds rushed through her, catching her breath in her lungs. She looked up into her human’s eyes, now resembling infinite pools. Were it not for his wonderful hold, she thought she would lose herself completely in the music. It was unlike anything she’d ever heard before and it was undoing her. She was crying, she wanted to laugh with delight. Every positive emotion she’d ever felt since meeting Winters was being drawn to the surface at once by the sound filling her being. His eyes held her through the crescendo…and it was over. As the piano let them down softly, she knew there was one thing, and only one thing, she wanted from her human right now. She hugged him tightly, feeling him respond in kind. Turning her face into his, she rubbed herself against him, nuzzling their cheeks as a delightful purr escaped her lips.
“Veera.” He whispered.
“Russell.” She replied, tilting her head and licking his cheek. It was small and chaste, but he seemed to understand exactly what had happened. As she withdrew to look at him again, he brought a hand up to the spot her tongue had caressed, touching it lightly. The smile he rewarded her with was everything she could have hoped to see on the face of the man she wanted. “Now…like a human?” She requested, her voice barely audible over the crackling fire. Winters said nothing, only nodding as he looked at her through lidded eyes. He removed his hand from his cheek and used it to cradle her own, placing the lightest of pressure on the underside of her muzzle to tilt her face into alignment, gazing down at her thin black lips. They were glossy and ever so slightly plump. There was no way he could deny her or his own desire. Closing his eyes, Winters leaned in and brought his lips into contact with hers. Veera’s eyes flew open and her diaphragm failed her for a moment before Winters withdrew, leaving arcs of electricity rioting across her lips.
“Again?” She asked. And again her human said nothing, this time taking her face in both hands and planting his lips firmly on hers. She was ready and closed her eyes, savoring the feeling of him. His lips were just as he was, kind and gentle, but also firm and strong. After what felt like an eon, he lessened the pressure, only to bring his lips into contact again, this time keeping them in motion. Veera felt her body go limp as he moved one hand to her lower back, holding her in place. He wasn’t trying to eat her, but his lips had become demanding, hungry. They were moving against hers, making tiny wet sounds that set her mind ablaze. She didn’t know what to do, how to react. Sensing her momentary trepidation Winters withdrew, looking into her eyes and searching for her reply.
“Again.” She requested, throwing her arms around his neck and moaning as he crashed his lips into hers. This time she tried to mimic his actions, opening her mouth ever so slightly to loosen and soften her own lips. As she joined him in this new ‘dance’, she was rewarded with a husky groan of his own for her efforts, a sound that stirred something in the pit of her stomach. Whatever this human method of nuzzling was, it was beyond delightful. Winters had begun angling his head to one side and then the other, taking his time to enjoy her lips before moving. She responded, performing the complimentary motions and allowing their lips to dance together. Where his first kiss had sent sparks flying along her skin, his ministrations now had her entire body alight. Her talons dug into the floor and her back arched, pressing her body into his. He responded to her, holding her tightly, commanding her mouth’s attention. Her feathers were fluttering and waving as each kiss came and went, light touches followed by powerful and commanding strokes, then soft brushing side to side. Oh the things this human could do with just his lips!
“Again!” Veera demanded hungrily, pushing him back to the bed and collapsing on top of him. He didn’t lose his hold once, moving both hands to her back as she straddled him, running his fingers through her fur and ensuring her lips wouldn’t leave his; not that she had any intention of doing so. Their breathing was coming heavily now as their lips clashed again and again. “Gods, Russell.” Veera moaned, her breath hot on his skin. His reply was to sieze her lips anew before extending his tongue and swiping it over them, eliciting a startled gasp from Veera. Oh my…what was that?! She could barely form coherent thoughts as his tongue began stroking her lips along with his own. Her vision was going white. It was almost…
“Too much…” She managed to breathe, barely. He stopped immediately at her words, withdrawing the pressure of his lips agonizingly slowly until he could see into her eyes again. His face was flushed, his hair mussed and unruly. His chest heaved with shallow breaths. He looked absolutely perfect.
“Veera…” He lifted himself with his core to claim her lips in a final, chaste kiss, soothing the sensory overload he’d bestowed upon her moments before. “That was amazing.”
“You mean it?” She asked, lowering herself onto him as they brought all their limbs fully onto the bed, Winters lying flat on his back. After a moment of adjustment she snuggled up to his left side, using her proximity to his heart to indulge in its soothing rhythm.
“I do mean it, feather kitten.”
“I’m not too…inexperienced?” She barely managed in a whisper. She knew he’d been mated before and there she was, slowing them down long before any clothing even came off.
“You’re perfect Veera.” He reassured her, bringing his left arm up to scratch the base of her ears. She mewled happily and rubbed herself against him.
“So are you, you sensual, wonderful, noble human.” She cooed.
“I definitely like the sound of that.” He chuckled, shifting his legs slightly to get comfortable. The straw bedding wasn’t an issue for him. He was about to sleep lying down, for a full night, with a remarkable woman in his arms. As far as Winters was concerned, he’d found a little piece of heaven out in the darkness. Veera’s purring soothed him as a sudden wave of fatigue washed over them. Emotionally and physically it had been a long day. As he drifted off, she murmured a question.
“Russell, what was that we just did?”
“That was kissing Veera. And I very much enjoyed doing it with you.”
‘That…would be incorrect.’ Io insisted, appearing in Winters’ visor in a set of green panties and a white tank top. She was sitting on the floor, her legs splayed out to either side. Her hair could only be described as post-coital. ‘That was the hottest moment of my life.’ Absolute silence reigned for a long moment. Winters thought his brow would ascend into his hair as he looked down his chest at Veera. Before long, it was too much to take and the new couple burst into laughter and mirth. As they finally calmed the fire began its final burn, the light slowly fading from the room. When darkness covered them, Winters and Veera nodded off peacefully, worries of the past and future cast aside in favor of the warmth and comfort of the present.
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A/N 2: I don't usually write notes like this as I don't want to influence people's perception of the chapter, but I just wanted to say that the relationship between Veera and Winters has come to mean far more to me than I ever imagined it would back in January. I think this is likely the most meaningful thing I've ever written...at least in the last few years. I want to give the two of them all the attention and effort they deserve and I very much hope you all enjoyed it and will stick around to see what they get up to next. And of course, high five to skyell!
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15: Keep your standards high: A study revealed you're more likely to O with a hottie.

24: Tie him up on his back, and use shoelaces to tie a remote-controlled vibrator to the shaft of his penis and play with speeds. (Shoelaces? Like, yank them out of my shoes and tie them around his cock?)

37: Read a young-adult novel. A new study found that they're raunchier than grown-up books. (...I'm pretty sure that's the opposite of what young-adult books are supposed to be..)

53: Wrap a belt around each of his thighs. This will push more blood into his penis, making his erection feel even harder.

56: A Rutgers University study showed that the trick to setting off a mental orgasm is to visualize naughty thoughts and activities. (I never would have guessed!)

60: Kick off a dirty e-mail like this: "When I get home..." Cosmo's sex blogger finished hers with "I'm going to spank your butt very firmly." (VERY FIRMLY, do you hear me?)

61: Long, pointy nails made a comeback this year - use those talons to scratch his back, chest, inner thighs...

69: Sit on top of him, then put your legs over his shoulders, lie all the way back, and roll onto your side on the bed (keep him inside you). He should be pumping you from the side while upside down. (WAT.)

71: The CAT (Coital Alignment Technique) doubles your O odds. In missionary, have him shift forward so that the base of his penis massages your clitoris. (How does this angle even work?!)

89: Get pleasure from his feet (really): Lie down, legs apart, with your guy standing above you. He should then use his (clean!) big toe to stimulate your clitoris. (Reminds me of the coin tip!)