The second ever hg-engine hack, Mythic Silver, is now live.
Get ready to spam some ubers.
A MASSIVE thank you goes out first to BluRose, Aero, Mixone, Senate, AdAstra, Silast, Drayano, ActiveHenry, Mojo, Brioche, Trinsic, Kenzy, and Cy for all their immense help in creating Mythic Silver, one of the most ambitious NDS hacks ever made. Without their continued help, none of this would have been possible. After nearly a year, and hundreds upon hundreds of development hours, the public beta is finished (the game is 100% finished minus a couple of signature move animations, and minor bugs).
You can download the game's patch and documentation here: DOWNLOAD HERE and the discord server for Mythic Silver and all other sauceyaTTa hacks here: DISCORD SERVER
HG-engine (the gen4 equivalent of CFRU, the "Radical Red engine") allows for previously tedious or impossible features, such as a massive dex expansions only seen in Emerald and FireRed decomps. Pokemon, moves, items, and abilities from generations 1-9 are included in this game for you to use and fight against.
Examples of new features are: automatic trick room battles, randomized leads, custom opponent Pokemon nicknames, enemy shinies, dynamic speed calculations, all 4 terrains, Primal Kyogre and Groudon weathers, gradually scaling hard level caps, trainer gauntlets, custom global warp zone to remove HMs, reusable TMs, Nature Mints, new battle items (Weakness Policy, Eviolite, etc...) as well as hundreds of new generation moves and abilities.
Oh, and a completely brand new region, story, and objective.
Example of a mid-game battle, with functioning electric terrain.
Pokemon Mythic Silver is an enormous overhaul to the Johto region, including a completely new story, with new maps, new sprites, new music (from Pokemon Mystery Dungeon, Platinum and more), new trainers, new gen Pokemon, and new battle modifiers.
Example of a new area -- Warped Weald, covered by a hazy fog.
Mythic Silver takes place after the events in PMD Explorers of Sky, this time with Darkrai seeking revenge, mangling both time and space from different regions all into one. Blessed by Arceus to encounter the most absurdly strong Pokemon, and partnered with some other familiar faces, the protagonist must journey throughout a new region to put a stop to Darkrai's plans.
Static Encounter with Volcanion in Azalea Industries, Flint's home.
There are many different flavors of maps in this game, from forests to wastelands.
Static encounter in Fleur Forest, the fairy haven.
The player may only obtain Mythical, Legendary, Sub-legendary, and Mega Pokemon. Despite this, there is a large pool of over 150 obtainable Pokemon, making for replayability. All of them have custom battle sprites, ranging from generations 1-9.
A typical encounter.
Throughout the game, you will meet many familiar faces, like the dynamic duo, Flint and Volkner from Sinnoh, who have come to make renovations to some towns. You will also learn more about Team Galactic, and other trainers like Clair, Whitney, Cynthia, Cyrus, Blue, Red, and many more.
Tag battle in the early game for extra items. Lava is animated!
If you've read this far, I highly recommend you try this game, the early beta testers have all really enjoyed it. On a very personal note, I have poured easily 600+ hours into development of this game. Many a night has been spent wondering how I can fit more textures into the game for more maps, how to compress songs so that the game doesn't reach the RAM limit, or even how to animate lava textures (which may have taken 4 hours by itself). I learned so much from other knowledgeable hackers, and made so many friends along the way. I especially enjoyed watching other hackers developing their own hg-engine hacks, such as Dray's Aurora Crystal, and taking inspiration from each other. I had so much fun live streaming map design (which you can watch all my hacking tutorials and development process at www.youtube.com/@sauceyaTTa), and I am going to go into detail at some point this summer to explain how I made certain features.
Mahogany Slum, a brand new area with a little Eternatus friend <3
Dynamic Camera which zooms out when crossing the bridge, thanks to Trifindo and Mikelan's PDSMS and bdhcam routine.
Lastly, I am very very very thankful for those in my discord server who extensively helped in testing, moderating, and keeping me motivated to churn out more features and content. Especially StaraptorOP, who has made numerous calcs, inspired me to continue hacking, and never lets any bugs or QoL features slide. I've been making ROM hacks for 2.5 years now (started December of 2021), and this is my 5th game, which took the longest by far to complete. I hope that you will enjoy playing this as much as I enjoyed writing the story, making the maps, crafting trainers, and re-arranging/porting custom music and sprites.
With much love,
sauceyaTTa

Hello sub, I am here to ask for advice for my mother (in her early 60s), who has had come and go vertigo for the past 6-7 years. First of all, I want to say that I am terribly sorry for all of you guys that have to deal with this sickness from hell. I've seen the suffering that my mom has faced from this issue and how much she's had to change her life to adapt to it. These attacks can happen anywhere from every 1-3 months to only one every half a year. Her symptoms will leave her unable to do much for about 1-2 weeks until symptoms slowly subside. She cannot move her head in specific directions or else they bring the symptoms back again. These attacks make it extremely difficult for her to sleep since she can only sleep on the unaffected side. She has this medication from the doctor to reduce the nausea and she takes it on nights she is feeling particularly feeling sick. One time we went to the urgent care to get a nurse to perform an epley manuever hoping that it would improve her symptoms, but the nurses there were so rough with her that it make things 10x worse. In fact, she's gotten it more frequently since that trip to the urgent care. She told me she's gone to the doctor for it but they only ask questions and never provided her any insight on how to proceed with this or finding the root cause. Shes not really hopeful that theres anything to fix this. I've done some research myself and have found that it is suggested that she goes to an vestibular physiotherapist. She's also looked into this and found that reducing stress and increasing vitamin D levels will improve her symptoms. I want to get some tips and tricks you guys have had and maybe some next steps I can help her take to mitigate the effect bppv has on her life. Thank you guys.

It’s that time again, where CompTIA releases a new version of their exams. This time, it’s their ever popular Network+
The old N10-008 exam is set to retire on December 20^th, 2024, and the new N10-009 exam is set to release on June 20^th, 2024
Along with the expiration dates, everyone’s favorite question to ask is: which version should I take?
Well, good news everyone! I have created an Excel spreadsheet that you can download (for free!) with all the objectives from the 008 and the 009 cross-referenced, meaning you can visually see which objectives overlap, which objectives got dropped from the 008, and which objectives got added to the 009
And for those of you who don’t feel like reading through hundreds of lines on an Excel spreadsheet, here’s a more concise meta-analysis contrasting the old 008 with the new 009:

• The 009 dropped a LOT of objectives from the 008. Here are the objectives that took a major hit:
  • troubleshooting in general across every previous objective has been downsized by a good 50-60%: Wi-Fi, connectors, etc.
    • good - because some scenarios were uncommon or overly specific (i.e. duplexing issues)
    • bad - because some scenarios are extremely common (i.e. incorrect DNS)
  • hardware (both networking devices and network tools) were downsized substantially
  • General Security, Physical Security, and Documentation types were cut back
    • mixed feelings - I think this might be an attempt from CompTIA to prevent too much overlap between their various certifications. But without doing another comprehensive comparison (problem for another day) it's hard for me to say for sure
• There is a ~69% overlap from the new 009 to the new 008
  • There are ~387 total objectives on the 009 exam. ~268 of them either completely or generally overlap with the old 008. Considering how old much of modern networking is (TCP/IP dates back to the 70s and still runs the internet to this day), this is unsurprising
• What new stuff did the 009 add?
  • Most new stuff to the Network+ isn't really new to the world of networking. It's more of a change of emphasis
    • Objectives that were altered: DNS, SD-WAN, an overhaul in Security Concepts, and an overhaul in WiFi. The biggest surprise of all however was a much more intense emphasis on Spanning Tree Protocol, which should make for some interesting exam questions
    • Completely new objectives: Section 1.8 on the 009 test objectives) is the only place that has completely new objectives to the Network+ - not just a change in emphasis - covering objectives like VXLAN and Zero-Trust

That’s it for my metanalysis. Hope some of you find it useful; good luck out there!

I, 19F, started dating some days ago, my very first boyfriend (22M). Today I went to my mom's driving by myself for the first time, so I took her out to buy groceries and paid for them, which is not a debt she has with me or something, but it contributes to my resentment.
My room at her house has no curtains, the bed is messy because she puts her stuff there as I don't spend most of the time with her and I don't love sleeping there overall. But since forever my mom let me sleep with her, and that's what I usually do. So I was sleeping at her bed, and she comes in and wakes me up to tell me I should've made the bed properly. I said that each one of us should use our own blanket so we wouldn't touch each other. What I meant is that we would get too warm if we shared the same blanket. She took it in other way, cause she immediately said "get out of my room, now". We start arguing, I start crying, she laughs at me, the same as all arguments, but now I have a car and I can leave. I say that I'm going back home, she gets furious and said that if I left her house she would never let me go back there again. I say "fine" and start grabbing my stuff. She then says "I'm going to dm my bfs name and tell him everything you're doing today". She never talked to him, to begin with, and I never even mentioned his name in the argument. The immaturity was so outrageous that I start laughing and say "for what? For him to side with you and start disliking me? He'll think you're crazy", she got even more mad and said "if he'd think that of me, then I never want to see him in front of me". I left.
Alright. I know both of us acted with a lot of immaturity. But for me that was the most ridiculous part. My mom, threatening to destroy my relationship with my boyfriend in the first argument we have. If in the beginning it's already like this, I'm scared what she might do in the future. She later sent me a text saying that she wouldn't take the humiliation from me, texted my dad saying that I was showing my true colors (they're divorced), saying that I'd always anger- drive everytime we had an argument, saying that I was acting like my dad, like my grandma (both people she hates), saying I am ungrateful.
Honestly, even though I messed up and overreacted, I think the way she acted is not appropriate as a mother. I don't understand how telling me to leave as if I'm a dog everytime she get slightly irritated is a respectful way of treating me, and threatening to affect my relationship with other people that have nothing to do with our argument is the worst part. I don't even know how to proceed

Planning on adding this to a gritty survival campaign. I seek the wisdom of the elder DMs.
Durability in DND
Durability is both health and damage reduction. (Health = Damage Reduction)
Example: Grog the barbarian does 14 damage with his great axe. Nothing happens. As it should be.
Jim the fighter grabs a chair (6 durability) and slams it on a goblin's face, doing 1d8+5 damage, rolling a 5, leaving the chair at 2 durability.
Some base values. We don't want tracking durability to be very common, so let's say you can pay one tenth the price of an item upon purchasing to add 1 durability.
Normal weapons have 24 durability.
Small weapons have 14 durability.
Fragile weapons have 6 durability. (Example: Improvised weapons.)
Small fragile weapons have 4 durability. (Example: Improvised weapons)
Note:
DO NOT TRACK DURABILITY OF RANGED WEAPONS OR AMMUNITION UNLESS YOU HATE YOURSELF
If a weapon has half (rounded down) or less durability, all attacks are at half damage. Weapons can take damage when they deal damage. If the damage dealt exceeds the durability, the weapon takes damage equal to the damage it dealt as durability. (I hope this is understandable.)
Example: Jim does his second attack with the 2 durability chair. He conveniently rolls the same, a total of ten damage, which is halved, but 5 damage is enough to bring the chair's durability to zero, destroying it. He picks up another chair...
For dexterity based attacks, only the base damage (the unmodified damage dice) can harm the weapon. (Basically never.)
Example:
Dagger does 1d6 damage. It can never damage itself, unless Grog the barbarian stabs someone with it, instantly destroying it with his 24 strength and rage damage. (Or doing heavy damage at least)
Sarah the rogue stabs someone with a dagger. No matter what happens, base damage cannot exceed fourteen, as her dexterity and sneak attack is not factored in.
Using this method, rogues don't have to replace rapiers every time they sneak attack.
Critical hits do no damage to the weapon.
I did this because critical hits are supposed to be cool. If a player would have destroyed a weapon in one hit, and they actually want to for roleplay reasons, you can allow it, because that is cool.
Critical Fails, if your game decides to have them, can be run however you want, or not at all. Suggestions near end.
(Please, never rob a player's turn because of a critical failure. This sucks.)
Weapons can be repaired whenever you have downtime, such as during a short or long rest. Every half hour spent with the correct tools and the damaged weapon can repair points equal to your dexterity or strength, plus your proficiency if you are proficient in the proper tools. You cannot effectively repair weapons if you are not proficient in either the proper tool or the weapon. (Representing knowledge of repair.)
Note: Mending exists! Though it does have a ten minute casting time, as well as material components. (2 lodestones.) Though foci can get past this requirement.
You can also pay one tenth the gold price of the weapon to repair twice as fast. (Representing excess resources)
Optional: You cannot repair objects at half or lower durability without having paid one tenth the gold price. (Seems clunky, use for your extremely gritty games.)
If a magical weapon is not unbreakable, the price to enhance repair is equal to one tenth the mundane weapon it is based on, not the price of the magical weapon.
Critical failures:
Upon rolling a one, you suffer a consequence of your (the player who rolled the one) choice.
You also gain inspiration.
Player choose one.
1: Weapon struck wrong. It loses durability equal to your strength modifier. (Not reduced.)
2: Weapon missed and flies out of your hand(s).
3: You don't necessarily miss, but the weapon hurts somehow you. Take half base weapon damage. (This damage can be resisted.)
4: Nothing happens, but you don't gain inspiration either.
Note: Make sure you add flavor. The weapon striking wrong could be striking the ground, or hitting something at the wrong angle. Getting hurt could be an axe bouncing off, or you slipping while passing a dagger from hand to hand. Whatever you do, keep it as the player's choice. If you did this for 'realism' remember that, while failure may be inevitable, such skilled individuals could see 'oh hey, my axe might hit me, better drop it.' or 'my weapon is going to strike wrong, let me reposition it with my hand so it doesn't get damaged.' Also, I heavily recommend making the whole thing 'so you rolled a 1, you can have inspiration if you choose one of these 3 options.' then you could do something cool with inspiration, maybe add options akin to my critical failures, but for critical success, and it costs inspiration to use those options.
DMs can add and remove options to fit the game's feel and mechanics.

There’s this one TikTok/Shorts cartoon called “Chikn Nuggit.” I’ve been watching it ever since it was brand new. It’s basically about a group of cute cartoon animals named after fast food products (e.g. Cheezborger, Cofi, Iscream, Fwench Fwy, etc.).
In earlier shorts, the characters just do silly things and occasionally break the fourth wall to spread positive messages to the audience (e.g. Happy Pride Month, you’re valid, things will get better, etc.).
At a certain point, however, the creators started making the cartoon more serial than episodic. This would’ve been fine if it weren’t for the fact that the “lore” is incredibly dark, disturbing, and existential.
This is the gist of what happened:

• A character named “Bezel” was added.
• Chikn (the titular character) is revealed to be a god with world-ending abilities.
• Bezel is hinted to take an interest in pushing Chikn to his breaking point and destroying everything.
• Bezel influences Chikn’s closest friend into a relationship with someone else. This causes the two friends to separate and Chikn falls into a depression.
• The latest short (as of typing this) shows Bezel looking over a depressed Chikn as his clock head ticks to midnight, hinting that something terrible is about to happen.

I discovered this cartoon at a dark time in my life. I don't want to go over any specifics, but I was feeling depressed and hopeless because of my doomscrolling habits and learning about how awful the world can be. The earlier episodes of this cartoon brought light into my dark mind. What made Chikn Nugit special compared to other "wholesome" cartoons is that it was openly queer. It's very rare to find openly queer cartoons that aren't serial dramas with depressing content (e.g. The Owl House, Helluva Boss (I'm not slandering those shows, btw. I love Helluva Boss. I've never seen TOH, but I've heard it's good), so seeing a queer cartoon that wasn't depressing was a breath of fresh air. Emphasis on "was" here, considering what Chikn Nuggit became...
When the cartoon started shifting directions and turned into a serial psychological horror drama, it affected me in weird ways. I know it sounds silly, but I honestly became more depressed. I got really angry. I've never felt this way with other cartoons. I just felt awful.
Around this time, I abandoned Chikn Nuggit and moved on to Bluey, a show that gave me the same amount of joy early Chikn Nuggit brought me. Unfortunately, Bluey has entered an indefinite hiatus recently, and Chikn Nuggit's "lore" has only gotten darker.
I often try to cope with my feelings by making a joke out of it online to make it sound ironic, but I unironically feel nothing but rage when I see Chikn Nuggit nowadays, especially the later episodes.
Am I alone here? Am I the only person who feels this way about a "silly" cartoon? Is it because I'm autistic? Is there a scientific explanation to my feelings? Are my feelings valid? Are there any other openly queer cartoons out there that aren't depressing and dark?

Car cut me off which resulted in a head on collision that launched me and my girlfriend from my motorcycle. Police deemed car at fault at the scene with witnesses. I have since exchanged information, filed a claim with my insurance, and contacted morgan&morgan and an attorney was willing to take our case. The driver has auto insurance through Geico, me Progressive. I imagine he has full coverage as he was driving a new car. This is in New Hampshire.
Our injuries: Me, small cuts and bruises, body sore, right leg sore small limp but otherwise will heal up fine Girlfriend, minor concussion and bad facial road rash/scrape, body also sore Bike, fucked up, not sure if totaled
Just curious on what Reddit has to say here. How much would you say can be expected in terms of financial compensation? Give me a rough ballpark. We have no seemingly long term issues and I am going to work on Monday. The bike is a 2004 honda shadow that was purchased in 2022 for $3500

Hey everyone, i hope you guys are doing fine 🙂 You can call me Sahm. I just turned 20 a few months ago. I am from Philippines, but i was born here in Saudi Arabia. Not really sure what i'm looking for here, but having someone to talk to would be great. I'm a huge fan of movies, shows such as Breaking Bad, Better Call Saul, Game of Thrones, Interstellar, The Martian, also Narcos(the show that i'm currently watching), and playing games like Oldschool RuneScape or Albion Online, so we can talk about those or play those games together. I also like mangas such as The Fable, or romance mangas like Kamisama Kiss, My Love Story, and whatnot. I like cartoons too, such as Adventure Time, Regular Show, Star Versus Yhe Forces Of Evil, Over The Garden Wall, and Gravity Falls. I also like playing Chess, cycling, and taking a walk. I workout every now and then too.
I don't really want to say it, but i don't really have any one to talk to haha 😅🥲 so it'd be cool if i find someone here that i can hang out with or something.
That's it i guess. Just send dm if interested. See ya there!

So, i had a birthday party where he agreed to pay the bill (i sent home $300 before the party because i was nervous it was going to be super high.) i invited 15 of my friends and family and it was at a karaoke bar. i ordered so many sojus for the party for all of us to drink and have a good time. he agreed to be the DD for the night ofcourse since it was my birthday.
once the party was over he and i and a friend were talking outside and he was mentioning how once we got him he was going to go ride his motorcycle. i told him HELL NO we’ve been drinking and that’s not a good idea and why???? he goes on as to why he wants to and i tell him to stfu. mind you, he did say if i cussed at him again he would break up with me so that’s where i fucked up.
he dropped my gifts on the floor and left. no where to be found. he sends me a text 10 min later that our friend was taking him home. so i was sick at the party (everyone had left already) with my car and drove home (which i k le wasn’t a good idea but i didn’t know any other way to get home.)
idk what to do after all this he’s apologized and we had a huge fight and idk if i want to continue the relationship because it hurt so much. i know he has a lot of trauma and is sensitive towards things but idk if i can handle it. but yeah i just wanted advise.. should i stay with him? now that he’s in therapy is it worth waiting? what would yall do in this situation?

***Throwaway. Not sure if this letter belongs here, but I really need to get this out somewhere. We're currently only a month into NC and I can't handle not being able to send this to her. But, I want to respect her space and will wait until she is ready. anyway, here it is:
I want to begin by stating that the sole purpose of this letter is to take responsibility of all my actions in our relationship, something I couldn't do while we were together due to my immaturity and lack of awareness. I did not take responsibility for anything. I planned on keeping this in my drafts and not sending it. I was afraid of how you would react to this. I'm not anticipating a response from you, I simply want to express this to you because it's long overdue. I never had the chance to sincerely and completely apologize for how I exploited your trust, compassion, and love.
at the 2 year mark of our relationship I started to become manipulative, insecure, needy, immature, and I stonewalled in our arguments/disagreements constantly. I broke down, withdrew from what was going on and tried to avoid it by not communicating back to you, which put a lot of damage on us and especially you as a person overtime. I never made you feel heard. Only now I see how much it has wounded you emotionally and, I truly never intended to cause you such distress. I was completely unaware of how disgusting everything I was saying and doing to you was. It was only after you left that I finally saw the full result of my own actions. While I should have been building you up I was doing the complete opposite. I got jealous over things you never did and that was a reflection of how insecure I was about myself. All you did was try to show me love and compassion every single day and I took advantage of it. How I handled our relationship was completely horrible and I truly regret doing that to you.
I am sorry for the numerous times that I manipulated you into not doing something for our relationship, when in reality it was for my own selfish reasons. Who do I think I am? No person should have control over another person and what they can do or not do in a relationship. I made you sacrifice your happiness and sanity for mine. I selfishly prioritized my own version of happiness and completely rejected your desires and needs. My actions were the result of my insecurities, traumas, and fears, which I deeply regret projecting onto you and I am so sorry for doing so. I am finally seeking the help I need to address these underlying issues. You told me time after time to work on it and I always failed to do so.
if you ever find yourself blaming yourself for anything that has happened in our relationship, please don't. Everything was completely my fault and I could’ve handled our situations more maturely. I had the inability to do what I said I was going to do; by not focusing on the inner work necessary to grow as a person and becoming a healthier partner. I look back at who I was, and I don’t recognize that person at all. I see an immature and childish boy who lost himself, grew complacent and went back to his high school mentality. I remember you saying something related to “i have no self confidence” or something like that and in that moment it was so low that I got offended by it. WHAT A WUSS. I was ignorant about my own issues and didn’t have the courage to do the inner work necessary to grow and as a result I continued to lash out at you or blame my past for the way I am. I couldn't stand myself or look in the mirror and face the person I was; I constantly questioned you and made you feel no trust from my end because I was so insecure within myself.
You were the first person in my life to ever show me what true affection felt like. I have never ever felt anything close to how you made me feel ever since the first night we met. you saw me in a way that no other person could and it felt like you always managed to see the good in me. As Zach Bryan says in his song, "the only bad you've ever done, was to see the good in me." It hits harder now. The day I lost you is the day I finally realized that I pushed you over the edge and I have no idea how I could do that to such an amazing and loving person like yourself. It was only then, that I decided to take action, and actually put in the work to be a healthier and loving partner. I became to comfortable with the fact that I would never lose you. I truly fckn regret it. I don't forgive myself for the way I acted and handled things in the relationship, but I'm growing and learning from the mistakes I made to be a more mature and loving partner. I'm sorry it took all that pain for me to take action.
I refused to respect the boundaries you were giving to me. I didn't listen to the hints you made and didn’t realize that it was something you wanted and needed from me. I overlooked it because again, I wasn’t aware of anything. I completely understand why you are so pissed off and possibly over me. I am ashamed of the way I have behaved in this relationship. no person should have to put up with that AT ALL. I understand an apology alone cannot undo the damage I have done, but I want you to know that I'm committed to making amends, if the opportunity to prove myself ever arises. But, after everything I've done, I don't know if that is or will ever be possible for you.
I just wanted to say thank you for forcing me to rebuild and becoming a better version of myself. you made me want to be more in tune and aware from within. I'm so sorry that it took all this pain for me to finally put in the work. I became so unattractive in your eyes and I know you couldn't stand who I turned into. I grew complacent and lost that happy, loving person you fell in love with. I'm not expecting you to stay as a friend or take me back as a partner. I now completely understand how badly I took advantage of your time and love throughout our relationship. no matter what happens, just know I love you with everything in me and always will, no matter what happens between us. You will always have a special place in my heart until that casket drops.
I'm truly, TRULY, sorry for giving you such an unhealthy commitment for the time we’ve been together.
B.

UPDATE: I (28M) have chased my fiance (27F) all my life. Became a doctor only because she wanted to marry a doctor. Found her cheating. What am I supposed to do?
I'm giving this update because I have been bombarded with a lot of DMs.
I have talked to her. She accepted cheating. We talked. She didn't object to anything I told her. She has told me she will respect whatever I decided.
It's was a messy thing. I am not in a state of mind to describe anything more.
I think this will be my last post here. So I'm making some things clear.
I have already missed a lot of hospital duties. We are not allowed to do that. I'm surely going to face the consequences. But I want to take a short break.
I know people are going to blast me for it. But I'm not going to dump her right now. This is not how it works here in India. If I do that, even if nobody else knows why everyone is going to point fingers at her and brand her all sorts of names. Societal pressure is a big thing in India. I don't wish it on anyone, even if they were my enemy.
People who have given me genuine advice, thank you from my core. I haven't been able to reply to you all. I'll when I'm okay.
A lot of you have pointed out my flaws, that I'm obsessive, spineless, a stalker and many things more. I acknowledge my flaws. I'll go to therapy and try to work on it. I accept I shouldn't base my whole life on a single person.
Most of the DMs and comments I have recieved have been outright hostile and abusive. Sorry I elicited such negative emotions. I didn't mean to.
Also I have painted her way too negatively in my previous post. I was low and I shouldn't have done that, I accept it.
She is materialistic I don't deny that. But she has never been a gold digger. She has never demanded anything expensive. Furthermore whenever I want to buy something expensive she shouts at me not to. She is materialistic in the sense she wants to good assets in our life which we can both use for long time. I was sorry if I mislead everyone and didn't make it clear.
Her wanting to marry a doctor has a good reason, which I had pointed out in that post. I know it and accept it. No, I'm not going to share it, because it's very personal.
She has never been exploitative or manipulative before. She has always been very devoted and has always put me first. That's why this incident was so heartbreaking.
I'm not defending her mistakes. Because even she didn't. She accepted. I'm also looking to accept all the mistakes I have made. No, she didn't blame me. I'm doing this on my own because I received so much feedback here. And no, neither me nor she has ever been abusive in our relationship. Everyone has small fights, that's all we had ever too.
I'm looking forward to improving myself mentally, emotionally and physically. I have not been emotionally strong as many of you have pointed out. I hope to work on that.
Thank you.

Just for kicks, a few end of game thoughts and musings. One random thing I’ve really enjoyed about this game is that you can still assassinate people when running up to them head on as long as you do it fast enough. This is a fantastic feature and honestly would probably work irl. I found it fairly realistic and I feel like most games that have stealth kills don’t let you do that? I could be wrong but it felt great in GoT. One of my favorite things to do. Really felt like you had the element of surprise and added to the experience.
The main story was pretty great, definitely hit some feels here and there. Though it was mostly towards the end. I think I would have enjoyed some more emotional involvement throughout however. Main side quests were all good, I really appreciated that and I liked how you followed a handful of good side quests through most of the game rather than tons of one off quests. There was a feeling of repetition in clearing camps and such towards the end but not bad for an open world game these days. Just a tiny bit of fatigue (no life-ing it prob didn’t help lol). There were definitely some really head scratch type of moments in the game. Like they take your gear away and you don’t even collect it again someone just has it somehow, and when Jin jsut wiggles out of the ropes somehow. Or why was I forced into wearing that ronin outfit for the duel with uncle? And jsut generally some weak story points that just seemed really avoidable. Oh and swimming through ice water in frozen areas, how did we not just get hypothermia and die lol. Especially since they make a deal about actually needing fire in the northern most areas.
Combat is wonderful of course, especially for an open world game. The parry system is perfect. All difficulties were fun, lethal is great. In the end I do think that the side step/dodge mechanic is a bit funky. Not bad just needs a bit of fine tuning as it seemed odd and inconsistent in certain areas mostly duels where at times the enemy seemed to just magnet to you during dodges or if literally be sucked out of mid dodge on attacks that featured the little orange dot, mostly the Khan fight phase 1.
Visuals and sound were top tier. I also loved the upgrade system. Maybe an unpopular opinion but I’m also a huge fan of having one weapon that you can carry with you and customize through a game. And upgrades never felt labored or annoying. For example Horizon FW absolutely made me hate how many different weapons there were and how protracted the upgrade process was.
Things I’d like to see in GoT2 personally are just fine tuning the combat and movement, but basically if it ain’t broke don’t fix it. A few new weapons would be nice but I don’t want to see them sacrifice quality of combat and balance for the sake of bunches of weapons. I also kinda hate when you’ve got like 5 different weapons on you somehow with no explanation. Maybe they add in some kind of polearm and an Odachi but you can’t easily switch between weapons so you kind of commit to a style. I would LOVE to see a dual wielding style since this actually existed. Maybe we could even run into a Musashi type character as an Easter egg. I also wouldn’t mind seeing some kind of home base as well with a reason to visit now and then i.e. switching main weapon types. I would definitely like to see some populated cities with stuff to do in them like mini games or whatever. I wouldn’t mind seeing them touch on Japans rich occult lore, doesn’t have to be outright demons and stuff but maybe just a fun side quest where it’s alluded to (although a Japanese Witcher game would be an absolute blast. I also would love it if CDPR adopted this kind of combat for the Witcher). As mentioned above, some weak story points, so it would be nice to see a bit more polish next time.
Overall though so glad this finally came to PC. It’s been good.

I think “my simple pleasure” is the best prompt. If used right it’s a good way to say things you like. For example mine was- thrift stores, new tattoos, Philly sports and R&B. Really depends how you write it
As a woman, I’d advise men not to use “I won’t shut up about,” as a prompt.
Woman constantly complain about men dominating verbal conversations. Saying you “won’t shut up about…” just reinforces that you might be one of those guys.
I think if you actually have a good travel story, that prompt can work. That is to say, I think that the "tiers" really fluctuate a lot from person to person, and your qualifiers ("this works if you're funny") are kind of proof of that.
For example, I have two pretty good stories about coming face to face with sharks, and one less good story about coming face to face with a shark. I think that the shark thing is just crazy enough that it intrigues most people. But you have to have a genuinely good story for it to work.
Also, someone else said they need to get rid of prompts - I disagree. It's really annoying if you try a new prompt and then can't go back to your old one.
I think “my idea of a good Sunday” is a great prompt bc if guys include it and they say “church,” I’m 95% more likely to like them.
THERE'S AN ART to curating your Hinge profile. If you're looking for quality matches, don't be the guy with a barren profile who sends a mildly-enthused "hey, how's it going" to every potential partner. Hinge offers a feature called prompts: conversation starters that let you show yourself off and spark more substantive conversations—and you should use them to your advantage.
Choosing the right Hinge prompts—and writing good answers those prompts—will help you scan the many fish in the sea to find those most suited for you. It might sound like a daunting task to craft the perfect profile, but at least you're an expert in the subject matter: you.
Best Practices for Crafting Your Hinge Prompts
Having an air of mystery may seem hot in movies, but it's just a waste of time in real life—especially when it comes to dating apps, where determining what's real and what's not is so much more difficult than it is in person. "Being coy may seem like a safer way to interact on apps, but it doesn't yield fruitful results," Engle says. (No one's swiping right on a bio that says "I suck at writing bios.")
So nix those coy answers and get specific when you fill out your Hinge prompts. The more specific you get, the likelier you are to match with people that are similar to you. That means you'll really have to think about yourself and want you want.
Be specific when discussing what you're looking for, too. Vagueness won't help narrow your options. For example, don't just say you're looking for "someone with a lot of personality" (is anyone not looking for someone with a personality?); say you're looking for "someone with a lot of energy, and who enjoys being active and trying new things" (or whatever that personality looks like to you). Be honest, both with yourself and in your profile. Don't say you're "super into the gym" because you want someone with a six-pack, when in reality you haven't been to gym in six months and have no intention of starting again.
Add a variety of prompts to paint a full picture of yourself. If all of your prompts are jokes, that doesn't reveal a ton about you. But, if all your prompts are serious, you might come off as a little intense—and you won't be revealing much about your day-to-day life.
The 20 Best Hinge Prompts to Help You Get You a Response
Here are 20 Hinge prompts to get you off the apps and into real relationships.
I'll pick the topic if you start the conversation...
Starting a conversation isn't easy, and with this prompt, you're meeting them halfway. It creates less of a barrier to entry for the person doing the messaging. Pick a topic you're interested in or care about, and "be as specific as possible," Engle says.
What you can say:
The best bands to come out of the 90's.
The worst holiday traditions.
The best and worst concerts you've seen.
The last time I cried happy tears was...
"Consider the things that really make you YOU," Engle says. Mentioning things you care about "will allow you to engage with like-minded people who share similar likes and interests."
What you can say:
When they showed Jason Kelce ripping his shirt off at Travis's touchdown against the Bills.
At the closing scene of All of Us Strangers.
When I PR'ed my back squat (the boys didn't see).
The one thing I'd love to know about you is...
It's always nice to see someone on a dating app be interested in you, even if they haven't seen you yet. Put that energy out there with this prompt. People might feel more comfortable responding when it's something about them, since they know themselves the best. Find a topic that's important to you, and let your potential match take it from there.
What you can say:
What would you do for a living if money weren't a factor?
What's your go-to coffee shop order?
Were you a Nickelodeon or Disney kid?
Let's make sure we're on the same page about...
The great thing about this prompt is you can make your answer as lighthearted or as serious as you want. If you have something that's a deal-breaker for you (like wanting an open relationship), you can insert that here. It also works if you have something a little less serious that still plays a role in your life (like putting pineapple on pizza) and you want to get that out there.
What you can say:
Not wanting kids.
The ending of Game of Thrones.
The shape of Earth.
This year, I really want to...
This prompt is an excellent way to open up potential first date options, or show how you want to work on yourself in this upcoming year. Want to get more creative, more fit, or try something new? Maybe someone out there wants to do the same—and wants a partner to do it with.
What you can say:
Try a ceramics class.
Drink less.
Find the best burger in town.
I'm looking for...
If you already know what you're looking for, you may as well lay it all out there. That being said, don't nit-pick or be judgmental in your answer. Don't be too vague either, or you won't narrow down your options for people best suited to you.
What you can say:
Someone who will get along with my family.
Someone comfortable with being in an open relationship.
A good time, not a long time.
My simple pleasures...
You're probably looking for someone with similar interests as you (at least, we hope you are). "Prompts serve as conversation starters, so consider your interests, hobbies, and skills and lead with those," Engle says. Odds are someone shares them with you.
What you can say:
The smell of fresh cut grass.
When Debbie from marketing brings in banana bread.
Open sunroofs.
I go crazy for...
Another easy way into talking about the things you like—but make sure it's something you can carry conversation on. "Focus on answers that you can go into detail on," Engle says. "Talk about interests, hobbies, and goals outside of romantic relationships to give potential partners a full picture of the person you are."
What you can say:
Planning my next trip before the one I'm on has even ended.
Barry Keoghan. Obviously.
Reruns of Pimp My Ride.

You should leave a comment if...

This is another way to discuss what's important to you, with a call to action for the other person. You can pull in your hobbies, hopes for the future, or interests—the world is your oyster here. But remember: specifics, specifics, specifics (don't just put down "you like sports").

What you can say:

• You were hoping for a Ravens versus Bills Super Bowl.
• Your Spotify daylist often includes the term "mallgoth."
• You're on the dance floor all night at the club.

A shower thought I recently had...

Balance your prompts by throwing in a lighter option here and there. A shower thought is a great way to show off your humor and how your mind works. Get creative.

What you can say:

• Could really use a beer in here.
• Whose Line Is It Anyway needs a reboot.
• Is Punxsutawney Phil doing okay mentally?

Green flags I look for...

Get a little deeper into what you're looking for in your person by hinting at characteristics you want to see in someone. It's better to be open and honest about what you're looking for in a potential partner then have to do the dirty work of talking to a bunch of people only to find out you don't actually see a future with them.

What you can say:

• Funny conversation, but can get deep, too.
• Tipping 20 percent, always.
• Emotional support water bottles. Here for the hydration.

We're the same type of weird if...

Have some nuance interests that you want to get out there? Here's your chance.

What you can say:

• You're hitting up the Renaissance fair every time it comes to town.
• You're the person everyone wants on their trivia team.
• You enjoy 5Ks on Thanksgiving, too.

I hype myself up by...
Everyone gets nervous when it comes to online dating. Confidence is hot, but most of us aren't 100-percent confident all of the time, and that's okay. This shows you're nervous, too, but can hype yourself up when need be.

What you can say:

• Blaring some hard rap.
• Power posing.
• Hitting the gym.

I feel most supported when...

Dating app prompts aren't all about making the right joke or being overly funny. You'll want to layer in some real prompts, too, to show potential partners you can get deep. This prompt is a great way to do that without getting too vulnerable before you're ready. Plus, it reveals a little bit about what you want out of a relationship.

What you can say:

• My partner help around the house.
• There's healthy communication.
• My family and friends support my work.

A fun fact about me is...

An oldie but a goodie. To mix in a lighthearted prompt with some deeper ones, stick with what you know and toss in your go-to fun fact from freshman seminar in college. Don't over think the "fun" part—just pick something you think is unique about yourself!

What you can say:

• I've been cage diving with sharks.
• I speak four languages.
• I never lose in Mario Kart. Ever.

Teach me something about...

Want to learn something new and find a partner at the same time? This is also a great way to show an interest in potential partners by making your answer something related to them. Like we said, people are always more comfortable talking about themselves because it's the one thing they know everything about. People love talking about their passions... maybe someone out there has the same one as you. This is a great way to find out.

What you can say:

• The Roman Empire
• Your ick list
• What you want to see in a partner

I know the best spot in town for...

Hate the phase of online dating where you message back and forth forever and never actually get to a first date? Us, too. This prompt can help speed up that process by getting you out of the app, and meeting in person. Suggest something you'd want to do for a first date.
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What you can say:

• $5 happy hour Miller Lites.
• VPR watch parties.
• Live music.

First round is on me if...

Another prompt that gets you out of the app and right into the first date. Plus, you can pose a characteristic you really want to see in a partner: a win-win. PSA though: If it translates, you do actually have to pay for the first round.

What you can say:

• You love a Dadbod.
• You also cried when My Chemical Romance broke up.
• You're okay with my dog joining us.

My typical Sunday...

This gives a little snippet into your every day life. You're probably looking for someone who lives a similar lifestyle to you (if you're a "sleep until the afternoon every weekend" kind of guy, you're probably not looking for a "6 a.m. half marathon on a Saturday" kind of girl), and this is a great way to give them that insight.

What you can say:

• Rearranging all my furniture...again.
• Hitting the snooze button relentlessly.
• A walk with the dogs, football with the guys, and meal prep.

Give me travel tips for...

Have a trip coming up? Hit two birds with one stone: get some travel recommendations and start up a conversation with a potential special someone. It's an easy entry to talking, and you can quickly branch to "well, where else have you traveled to recently?" Even if you just put down your neighborhood—there's nothing like a little stay-cation.You should leave a comment if...
This is another way to discuss what's important to you, with a call to action for the other person. You can pull in your hobbies, hopes for the future, or interests—the world is your oyster here. But remember: specifics, specifics, specifics (don't just put down "you like sports").

What you can say:

• You were hoping for a Ravens versus Bills Super Bowl.
• Your Spotify daylist often includes the term "mallgoth."
• You're on the dance floor all night at the club.

A shower thought I recently had...

Balance your prompts by throwing in a lighter option here and there. A shower thought is a great way to show off your humor and how your mind works. Get creative.

What you can say:

• Could really use a beer in here.
• Whose Line Is It Anyway needs a reboot.
• Is Punxsutawney Phil doing okay mentally?

Green flags I look for...

Get a little deeper into what you're looking for in your person by hinting at characteristics you want to see in someone. It's better to be open and honest about what you're looking for in a potential partner then have to do the dirty work of talking to a bunch of people only to find out you don't actually see a future with them.

What you can say:

• Funny conversation, but can get deep, too.
• Tipping 20 percent, always.
• Emotional support water bottles. Here for the hydration.

We're the same type of weird if...

Have some nuance interests that you want to get out there? Here's your chance.

What you can say:

• You're hitting up the Renaissance fair every time it comes to town.
• You're the person everyone wants on their trivia team.
• You enjoy 5Ks on Thanksgiving, too.

Hey yall! I made a post the other day, asking for resources to learn about the game. Boy did you guys deliver!
I'm incredibly thankful to everyone who answered, so, like a mouse with a button that dispenses food, I come here again!
So, I'm currently debating between two armies, the Nords and the Spire. I love all the models of the Spire, the Nords are cool too and i especially love the valkyries and anything that's dogo like.
I'm currently wandering with which army to start, and that made me wonder on how i'll start.
I was initially gonna pick up one of the One Player boxes for either factions, but then i found the First Blood box sets. Seems more affordable, a good introduction to the game models, and a good buff to puss any One Player box to over 1k points.
But i am wondering, can you field these units in 1k games? Most of them come with a single square's worth of models.
So, say i pick up the nords first blood box, then later the One Player box. Will i be albe to add say, a single dogo to my list, or do i need to take them into squads of 3? Could i buy the boxes for each model and add them on top of it? Like for instance, buy a box of 3 wolf dogos, and add the singular 4rth dogo into their squad?
The other thought that crossed my mind was, perhaps it might be worth buying multiple First blood boxes, but while that might be the case (idk if it is) I'd have like, 3 of the same character. And since each of them only joins one unit, i don't see that as a very good thing?
Also, hobby related question but is it normal/acceptable/encouraged to kitbash characters or units? I play 40k, specifically GSC so i'm used to kitbashing whatever characters i need, but not sure if that's a thing in this hobby. If it is, i might be able to do something with the extra characters, but having 3 of them seems like a bad idea?

i (17 f, daily pot smoker) have been taking lamotragine (to treat my BPD) for about like a month or so i started off with 25 mg to 50 mg and three days ago i just started 100 mg and a few hours after i started to feel like i couldn’t breathe and my heart was RACING and pounding so hard so i went to the ER because i called a nurse hotline and explained everything i said and she told me to hang up and call 911, i went to the ER and got bloodwork and an X ray and they said my oxygen levels were 100% and everything came out negative it’s just my meds that make me FEEL like i can’t breathe but i CAN. next day i split my 100 mg pill into a 50 because i just hate how these make me feel and the shortness of breath is NOT worth waiting to see if it’ll go away. it’s hell. it’s been three days since the ER and STILL i am having shortness of breath, last night my chest hurt so bad every inhale and i woke up with an extremely swollen throat/tonsils, im better later today but yet again, i STILL feel like when i inhale it’s not enough air. its magnagable i guess now that i know im not gonna die from lack of oxygen, but i am a regular pot smoker and i heard that weed can increase the side effects of the lamotragine. my psychiatrist told me to not stop smoking pot because it’ll make it harder for me to be able to tell if it’s me not smoking weed or if it’s the meds that are making me feel weird, but I’ve taken breaks from smoking before, and it has literally never in my entire life made me feel this way. i’ve only been smoking for 3 years straight though but i really really really wanna smoke right now for my mental health and my TMJ and other medical issues as i have a medical card…but I’m just scared it’s gonna make me feel even worse or that I will stop breathing, but I heard that if you have nicotine withdraws, it can trigger seizures. so I’m wondering if it’s the same with weed even though I know ppl don’t really have weed withdrawals. anyone know what i should do? should i smoke or stop until my meds are fully out of my system after slowly decreasing the meds
tldr: scared that if i smoke it will make me have negative side effects (shortness of breath and heart palpitations) but also scared if i dont the withdrawals will trigger seizures, what should i do?

Height: 5’4”
Weight: 265
Age: 24
Sex assigned at birth: Female
Geographic region(s) your ancestors are from: IPoland (Paternal); Scotland and Bohemia (Maternal)
Medications: Baclofen, Protonix, Celebrex, Hydroxyzine
Simplified Symptoms list: itchiness all over my body, twitching and writhing of whole body, leg weakness, shocking sensation in spine (a constant one that feels like my spine is a live wired and the other being big waves of shocks that come all the sudden and last a few hours), tactile hallucinations, fainting or passing out or falling asleep (don’t know which) that ranges from 1-2 times a day to 40+ times a day, hands suddenly stopping working which causes me to drop things which I don’t notice until it hits the floor, hands unable to feel temperature correctly, slurring of speech (noticed by family not me), feeling like my tongue is heavy and it feels harder to form words, speaking loudly even though I think I’m speaking normally, severe forgetfulness
Health background - history of past illnesses, surgeries, etc.:
Past Illnesses: Endometriosis, Osteitis Pubis, Tendonitis, Chronic Rhinitis, bilateral Cochlear Implants (completely deaf without them)
Surgeries: Tonsils, Adenoids, Deviated Septum surgery, gallbladder removal surgery, endometriosis removal surgery (Has come back; another surgery in August), eye surgery, and both of my cochlear implant surgeries
Background of Symptoms - Tell the story and background of your symptoms. Things to include: When the symptoms began, what was happening around the time the symptoms started (eg. if you started or stopped any medication, injuries, trips, etc), what makes symptoms better or worse, things doctors have already ruled out, any changes from the initial presentation of the symptoms, etc:
The itchines started in December of 2020. Hydroxyzine mostly gets rid of it. The leg weakness started in March 2021. The hands not working symptom and not being able to feel temperature accurately started in April 2021. My twitching and writhing began exactly on May 1st, 2021. I was fine and then all of a sudden it started happening and I went to the ER. Nothing happened before that. I didn’t go on any new medicines or start eating any new foods. Before the last two weeks, the Baclofen got rid of it completely and I took it every 12 hours. Around May 21st, 2024 I all of a sudden started twitching and writhing 6 hours after the previous dose. I went to the ER and they gave me a big dose of Ativan and then the doctor said I could start taking Baclofen every 8 hours. I am always twitching a little bit, but it doesn’t start to get bad until 6 hours after the last dose so as soon as it’s been 8 hours I take it right away. If I’m sleeping I won’t have it. The shock started on May 22, 2021. The tactile hallucinations started on May 27th, 2021. The remaining mental decline symptoms just started 2-3 weeks ago. The only symptoms that I have are medicine that helps the twitching writhing and itchiness. Nothing makes these symptoms better or worse except that the fainting seems to get worse when I am in more pain or my symptoms get worse. Over the past 2-3 weeks since the twitching and writhing got worse and I got the new symptoms my fainting/sleeping got worse too. I didn’t start any new medications before the symptoms. The medicines I was on I had been on for 5+ years. The others I took after all of these symptoms. The symptoms have progressively gotten worse over the past 3 years until 2-to 3 weeks ago when it just really got worse quickly all of a sudden. I didn’t have any falls, accidents or anything traumatic happen.
Family history - List of family members and their illnesses (be sure to include if they are maternal or paternal relatives):
Mother: Primary sclerosing cholangitis, liver transplant
Father: High blood pressure
Aunt (Mom’s sister): Celiac disease, Rheumatoid Arthritis
Sister: POTS, EDS
Tests and Work Done -
I have metal on both sides of my head because of cochlear implants so I can’t do an MRI. When I had a CT scan the metal in my head created a huge white area on both sides so the CT scan was found inconclusive but negative for the parts they could see. However, most of the CT scan is white so you can’t see anything. I was taken off of all of my medicines for a month to test for serotonin syndrome, but nothing happened so I don’t have that. I had a spinal CT with contrast on April 22nd, 2022. That came back negative. I’ve had an EEG and EMG. Those came back negative. They noticed some activity on the EEG, but they didn’t know what. I had an MSLT sleep study and that came back negative for narcolepsy (I didn’t pass out/fall asleep at all though. I believe because I was uncomfortable and was on alert). I have had lab work done. Those are all of the tests I’ve had done.

I’ve been married for over 10 years to an abusive man (mostly emotional abuse) and thankfully separated from him about a year ago.
My emotions have been all over the place in the last year… happy, relieved, motivated for divorce finally, and on the flip side- I’m still trauma bonded. I’ve felt sad, lonely, confused, and even tempted to take him back.
I’ve been experiencing years of depression and anxiety due to the abuse. I really thought that after separation I would immediately feel better, but I still feel very depressed… I know it will take time to heal and become mentally strong and healthy again, but it’s been really hard.
Lately I’ve been realizing that a lot of my struggles now are due to my rock bottom self esteem. I feel like I can’t trust myself, I feel like I can’t make decisions, like I’m not good enough to get any employment (in my current state at least)… the list goes on.

• For anyone who has moved on successfully from an abusive relationship, how long did it take you to rebuild your self esteem and even motivation for life? Any advice or words of encouragement? -

More than anything I just want to be able to move on, love myself, and love life again. I feel like I’ve completely lost my old self 😞

Hey fellow guitarists! 🎸 Ever noticed a crackling sound coming from your amp that's not part of your jam session? No worries, we've got you covered! Here's a breakdown of common causes and solutions for dealing with guitar amp crackling:

1. Why the Crackling: From faulty output lines to bad soldering, various issues can lead to that unwanted crackling noise. Understanding these reasons is key to fixing the problem.
   
2. Fixing Tube Amp Crackling: Whether it's rumbling, glassy, or random crackles, there are steps you can take. Testing and swapping out tubes, checking connections, and cleaning components can often do the trick.
   
3. Precautions for Fixes: Safety first is crucial! Make sure you're taking necessary precautions like wearing protective gear and seeking professional help if you're not confident in handling the amp on your own.
   

Remember, a little crackle can sometimes be a lot of hassle, but with patience and the right approach, you can get your amp back to rocking smoothly! 🤘🔊
👉 https://www.allstringed.com/why-does-my-guitar-amp-crackle/

hi, this is my first post on this burner account. to be honest i dont know where to start. i hate ela and writing so excuse me for any mistakes. my dad is yelling at my mom right now, and again over the littlest thing so i guess ill start with my dad. he fucking sucks okay, think of every podcast person and multiply it by andrew tate 100x. he is super religous hates women and thinks of them as basicly servents and "robots" fo men. I myself dont belive in any religion and my dad will litteraly 100% in not shitting disown me or kill me if i ever tell him that. I live in the us so yea.. i think that says alot. he is bipolar as fuck, he can go from ranting about how he as a "father" has rights to kill anybody in his family to buying me tacobell and laughing about it the same night. he started beating my mom just because my brothers potty was full and nobody flushed it. i can go on and on about how he sucks and i will probably make a list and post but not now. okay so my mom is really nice, she used to be narcicistic to my sister and me when we were little but she changed and I truly love her and wish I could do something. I dont have much to say about her. she helps me when im depressed but i cant tell her im athiest, im not sure how she will react. i dont know if she wills stop loving me. a few months ago my dad hit her and i guess that was my last straw, i tried calming my dad and tell him its not right and that the religon doesnt allow that, he got really angry and started going on a rant on how he can do "whatever he wants" with his wife. i got angry and we started screaming on the road, i never did anything like this and i started shaking and sweating and i just could hold anything in. alll that abuse like 10+ years of it being screamed at his face. he started threatening to kill me and my mom. my younger sister started being really scared in the back of the car so i stopped screaming and just started crying. he was mumbling about how hes going to "show me what his dad did to him" and my mother threatened to call the cops he got really pissed of and went away for a day. he texted my mom about "I DO ALL THAT SHIT FOR YOU, I GIVE YOU CLOTHES, MONEY, FOOD AND AN EDUCATION FOR WHAT? SO YOU CAN CALL THE COPS ON ME? I JUST PUNCHED MY WIFE A LITTLE! NOT EVEN THAT HARD (the religion) ALLOWS ME TO HIT HER IF SHE DOESNT LISTEN (my mom just sighed at what he requested) I WILL LEAVE ALL OF YOU AND GET 3 MORE WIVES" which i wish was true because i wanted him to leave and be gone. but he came back that night and broke my sisters phone so she cant called the cops and starting "lecturing me" about how a man can do anything to his wife and family and his son should not be in the way, and that i can yell at my own family and hit them. i said "you said you would kill me " and he responeded "YEA i CAN i CAN kill you IF I WANTED" he asked where my phone was and i gave it to him. he yelled at me some more and put my phone on my desk. he said that a son needs to call his father (he works at a truck so hes not home alot so thank FUCKING GOD) he kept it up for like months being mad and yelling but since then he never hit her, at least to my knowledge. he always lectures me about "being a man" and how "hitting women" is okay". he decided that we are going to move back to our home country, he said if i tried calling the police there they would just beat me because "a man can hit his wife" my sisters and mom will have FUCKING ZERO rights there and now i worry for them. i get thoughts.. on how to deal with it. some violent. more on him. i sometimes get thoughts for myself about a quick and easy way out. i worry for my family. alot. but to my belief they have been brainwashed by the religion. just my opinion. i wont be able to take the easy way out unless the threat(my dad) has been nutrilized (i hope he dies in a truck collision)
help? man idfk. a little reassurance would be nice. somebody to tell me evrything will be okay. but i know it wont be.
TL;DR My dads an extreme mysoginist and abusive i love my family (dad doesnt count) my dads taking us to live in our home country (my family will suffer) and now i dont know what to do

Hello wise women,
I've been reading some of the posts about the variety of experiences with weight gain and HRT. My story is that I lost my period at age 43, when I happened to be running 250 miles per month. I wasn't overly lean IMO (I wasn't even down to my "normal" pre-child weight!). I was eating carnivore. Yes, all this was in response to a subtle shift in my body comp that I felt like a low pressure system deep in my being. The doctor and even my ND assumed I was in menopause after a year with no cycle. I worked with an amenorrhea coach and my ND. I started taken HRT due to my inability to get my periods back and my young age to protect my bones/ CV system. I had an insane reaction to the patches (wild deep red streaking all over my thighs and abdomen, not raised or bumpy or itchy). I switched to compound estradiol cream and 100mg of progesterone. My reaction to that? I got high. Laughing unable to walk upstairs to bed--it was awesome. But only lasted a few nights. I've since acclimated to the patch and have a higher dose since I keep testing low.
I have struggled with compliance. I would take the HRT and yes they helped w sleep and the bottomless depression; the mood help is pretty profound. My sex life is pretty great on HRT and pretty meh without. But on HRT the depression got worse in some ways bc of the rapid weight gain. In response, I would stop HRT, drop a few pounds and then inevitably the no-sleep demon and the other kind of marrow-deep depression would take me down. I would restart HRT. Each cycle was about 6 months. Then at the age of 47, I got my period back (last summer). For real. So I got to stop the hormones and wow I recognized myself in the mirror again very quickly (days!). I even went back to playing soccer - a lot. Maybe you can guess what happened a few months later...ACL rupture. Holy shit show. I did well w the surgery, excellent w the rehab and still, the depression/ the stress all of it, made my periods go away again.
I held out as long as I could but the no-sleep demon came for me and I had to go back on hormones. The weight gain is well, double-take level. As in, if I run into an old friend there is a visible swallow and eyes widening. I'm a former collegiate athlete, a surfer, I have a goddamn degree in exercise science and I have the discipline of an Olympian. I have a bike desk. I work out with impeccable form daily with proper periodization, planned rests, and have toned down the running (obs, see injury above). I can stick to any diet. I never overeat. I get my protein in daily. I hit my water goals. I take magnesium. All the things-done. I have never undereaten until this phase of my life. And this is crazy making. It feels like my body is gaslighting me. Oh you ate 1000kcals yesterday? Here's 3 extra pounds for your effort.
Like many of you, I had a traumatic childhood w a host of abuses. Trying and successfully figuring out cause and effect has saved my life on numerous occasions. It's important to me to understand why the laws of thermodynamics no longer apply. It's also bringing up some fear, uncertainty, & loss of control issues.
My pull-up game is weak (umm 1? If I cheat), my push-up game has suffered. My abs are still strong as hell but I can only see the top 4--the bottom part--WTAF is happening. I've put the work in, perhaps you may say too much work. If so, you a) may be right & b) maybe it will make someone out there feel better that someone with my track record/ experience is struggling mightily.
It's very important to me to feel in control of my body and I've tried to do so in a physically healthy way. For the mental part, I've done so much therapy. I've done every treatment under the sun short of electric shock therapy (thought about it) for mind and body. But the kind of stuff I went thru isn't the type of thing that really ever lets you feel safe again. This--my body, my health, my earning of my health has been my safety. Feeling fast and strong and fit has been my blankie. I want it back.
I'm currently 48, had a period last month, which I would love to think means I can stop HRT but since I re-injured my meniscus (PT had me jumping way too soon post-op sadly), I'm worried that my cycle has hidden again. I'm incredibly sensitive to stress and I always have been. Most of my life I've felt that I'm not quite cut out for it all due to my over sensitivity & insane hyper vigilance.
Has anyone else had such a clear weight up on HRT/ weight down off HRT experience? If so, did you say screw it, and just deal with low mood, no interest in sex, yet steamy, damp nights nonetheless...forever? Or did you go the other route and say eff it, I'm gonna see just how high my body fat can actually get to?
I'm tired of waffling between two of the shittiest choices on the market.